Original subtitles

[theme music]

OK, so just to bring you up to speed,

we got these totally righteous promotions that turned

out to be totally heinous.

That batty nut job, Terrance, asked us to take out Jerry.

And if we didn't, he was going to take out Dean--

ultra lame, right?

So we found Jere, and he came up with a brilliant plan.

We make it look like we eliminated him.

Then, together, we go lay a major butt kicking on Terrance.

One problem though, the plan didn't go exactly

the way we wanted, poor Jere.

[crying]

Anyway, when we went back to the WOOHP training facility,

we found out that Dean was, get this, a double agent!

Can't say we say that one coming.

So then, we find ourselves hanging on

for dear life over this bottomless-pit,

evil, ballroom thingy.

And just when it looks like we're

about to bite it big time, this freaky mystery helicopter

shows up.

Hello!

Can you say random?

I so have no idea what's gonna happen to us.

[grunting]

Thanks for the save, Mr. Helicopter Guy.

ALL: [gasp] Jerry!

I can't believe it!

You're still alive!

JERRY: [giggling]

It really is you!

In that case, group hug!

ALL: Aw!

Ew!

Gross!

We're the ones who should be sweating, not you.

It's not sweat, Clover.

It's my wetsuit, tailor made by Grahams of London--

kept me well insulated in the chilly waters.

Ah, that's better!

But we thought you were totally

swimming with the fishes.

So does Terrance, no doubt.

Your more than convincing reactions saw to that.

How could you trick us like that!

I'm sorry about that, spies.

But now that Terence truly thinks

I'm cavorting with the crustaceans,

we can safely thwart his evil plan to hijack

the Spy Droid project.

Ugh, Spy Droid, Spy Droid, Spy Droid--

that's all anyone's talking about these days.

Yeah, how come we never heard about it before?

The Spy Droid project is WOOHP's most top secret

endeavor.

I've been personally spearheading it for 15 years.

At an ultra high security location,

WOOHP is building a small army of

super sophisticated androids. SAM: [gasp]

ALEX: Wow!

JERRY: But they will, in fact, be

the super agents of the future.

Whoa, let me get this straight,

you want to replace us with machines?

Some gratitude for all our hard work.

Yeah, so much for being the chosen ones.

Girls, girls, the spy droids won't

be operational for 50 years.

By then, you'll no doubt be sipping

tea in your charming, Cotswold cottages.

Cotswold cottages?

OK, Bahamian villas-- whichever,

but your jobs are safe and more crucial than ever now

that Terence is on the loose.

But why is Terence so interested in the spy droids?

Unfortunately, we don't know what

nefarious plans he has in mind.

But we do know this--

if the spy droids ever fell into the wrong hands,

they could take over the world.

Wow, this could be like the most important WOOHP mission

ever!

You know, besides the one where our mall was under attack.

We've got to stop him!

We've got to find him first!

But where could he be?

I think I've got a pretty good idea.

Hypersonic speed!

[whoosh]

[shivering and teeth chattering]

Welcome to Antarctica, spies--

home of WOOHP's most clandestine facility.

Wow!

It's so clandestine I can't even see it!

That's the idea.

Follow me.

All I can say is they better have a hot tub!

[music playing]

[beeping]

Now keep it down, girls.

We must retain the element of surprise.

(WHISPERING) Wow, that's the most androids I've ever seen!

And let me tell you, I've seen a lot of Androids!

[gasp] Look!

[laughs]

And now, the moment I've been waiting for--

time for the droids to awaken from their slumber

and serve Master Terrance!

Hm.

[static]

What's happening?

Get up, you titanium twits!

The spies must have switched the chip.

I told you we couldn't trust them!

Impossible!

JERRY: Impossible is our business.

[gasp] You're alive!

But Terrance saw you do a bloomin' header himself!

JERRY: [laughing] Some a trick of the eye, ol' chum.

[scream]

[grunting]

You're going down, double-agent boy!

[whooshing]

[screams]

[laughing]

[gun firing]

[laughing]

You never were able to defend against my atomic wedgie,

brother!

Brother?

You wish!

I'm afraid it's true.

Ladies, meet my twin brother, Terrence.

[gasp] Twin brother?

[music playing]

But, Jere, he doesn't even look like you!

The magic of plastic surgery, my dear.

A little nip here, a little tuck there--

after all, who would want to look like the most

evil man in the world?

Jerry, evil?

As if!

Apparently, you didn't get the memo.

You're the evil twin, not him!

Yeah!

Jerry has dedicated his entire life to fighting evil!

Not quite his entire life, I'm sorry to say.

There was a time when this paragon of virtue

was evil incarnate in short pants!

Dear, young Jerald and I were just

finishing up our fourth year at venerable Clottsworthy Academy.

Knowing our parents expected nothing less than perfection,

we decided to share our knowledge during final exams.

You cheated?

We cheated.

But one fateful day, the jig was up--

for me, at least.

I was hung out to dry by my own brother, my twin brother!

While little Terrance's life spiraled downward,

and he turned to pilfering pennies just to survive--

and all because of his dear, twin brother!

You expect us to believe all that?

Not only would Jerry never cheat,

the idea that he would betray his brother, his twin brother--

It's the only time I've ever lied in my entire life.

And not a day goes by that I don't regret it.

Enough waltzing down memory lane!

Give me that real microchip, now!

I'm sorry, dear brother, but I don't have it.

[scoffs] It seems this is the second time you've ever

lied in your entire life.

Dean!

Looks like you've chipped your tooth!

[grunting]

[laugh]

[screams]

[grunts]

COMPUTER: Password, please.

Winford.

How did you know?

That the password was the name of your childhood pet wombat?

That mangy marsupial menace you loved even more

than your own brother?

You know, lattes also come in decaf.

[laughing]

Behold!

My very own army of evil Jerrys, or is that redundant?

[laughing]

Wow, they even have your same exact comb-over.

Very clever, what do you have in store for us now?

These creatures with my likeness robbing banks

all over the world?

How petty, is it any wonder mother liked me best?

Robbing banks?

Please.

You're going to witness the destruction of the one thing

you love most--

WOOHP!

And you are going to do the destroying!

[laughing]

No!

You can't do that!

[rumbling]

[music playing]

Good heavens!

[scream] Let him go, you evil, spy droid, Jerry lookalike!

Unhand me at once! [grunting]

You will never get away with this!

Who's going to stop me, you?

[laughing]

Well, barring any flight delays, we should be in Beverly Hills

by 1:30-ish, destroyed WOOHP by, oh,

2:15, and it's off to the beach for a well deserved nap.

Oh, one more thing, Dean, get rid of them.

And this time, do it right.

And do it slowly.

[laughing]

[grunting]

[laughing]

[gun whining]

Dean, um, can't we talk about this?

You know, that thing is really dangerous.

A job well done is its own reward.

[buzzing]

[gasps]

Hey, aren't you supposed to be the bad guy?

You just let us go.

That was his first mistake!

Wait!

I'm on your side!

Guys, I can explain.

Listen, I'm your actual WOOHP instructor.

I'm your friend!

All your virtual instructors were just a different part

of my personality, see!

Whoa!

Freaky!

The only way for you to get out alive

was for me to get close to Terence,

so I pretended to switch sides.

Besides, I'd seen you guys in action.

I knew you'd find a safe way out somehow.

So you're a double, double agent?

Double double?

Wouldn't that make him a quadruple agent?

The point here is, I'm one of the good guys.

I knew someone so cute could never be evil.

You know, I've got this debutante ball coming up soon,

and I was wondering if maybe--

Later, Clover!

We've got to save WOOHP now!

Let's go!

[helicopter taking off]

Now remember what you learned.

Even though we'll be outnumbered by about 100 to 1,

you can win by a evaluating your fear factor

and manipulating it, surrendering to your intuition,

and using teamwork.

See, he even talks cute!

Hang on!

There it is, WOOHP headquarters,

the epicenter of all evil!

Attention spy droids, fulfill your glorious mission!

Jump and attack!

[music playing]

Hm?

Hey, boss is back.

[gasp]

Gary, what's going-- [grunts]

[explosion]

[thud]

[explosion]

[siren blaring]

[explosions]

[laughing]

Attacking the innocent, how noble.

Coming from a true man of honor.

Now, time for us to join the party!

[alarm blaring]

[phone rings]

WOOHP headquarters-- I'm sorry,

he's tied up at the moment.

Would you like his voice mail?

[laughing]

Take one last look, dear brother,

before it's all gone for good.

Do what you will, Terence.

But you can never completely destroy WOOHP.

Not unless I blow up the nuclear core.

That's impossible!

Only I have the clearance to access that information!

And I personally designed the security system

based on the latest in DNA scan technology!

And I, being your identical twin brother--

Share my DNA.

Why didn't I think of that before?

[music playing]

[explosion]

[gasp] That's WOOHP headquarters!

It's under attack!

[grunt]

Hey, this will get the red out!

[gasp] Hiyah!

It's all in the wrist!

[grunting]

Hiyah!

Somebody has gotta take the fall!

Let's go!

[alarm blaring]

Terry, you don't know what you're doing.

Don't I?

The core of WOOHP will be no more--

like your cold, black heart!

[beeping]

Spy droid will self destruct in 60 seconds--

59, 58, 57--

Farewell, dear brother!

Wait, don't I at least get a proper handshake?

How about the Clottsworthy Academy secret handshake--

for old times sake?

I suppose it would be a fittin' final parting.

In spite of all this, you must know I'm deeply sorry.

You always have been an odd bird.

Hm, more like a sly fox.

[music playing]

[screaming and grunting]

[zapping]

ALL: Jerry!

[explosion]

Ah, mirrors, is there anything they can't do?

No time to waste, spies.

There's a walking time bomb headed for the core of WOOHP.

We've only seconds to spare-- and 498 to go!

With luck, this chip should deactivate the lock!

COMPUTER: Password, please.

Winford. COMPUTER: Invalid

Invalid?

He must have changed the password!

Evil twin?

COMPUTER: Invalid.

Ugh, rude much?

COMPUTER: Invalid.

[gasp] Wedgie!

COMPUTER: Invalid.

[grunts]

Uh, backstabber!

[beeping] ALL: Oh!

JERRY: [giggling]

[beeping]

15, 14, 13--

[powering down]

COMPUTER: Spy droids deactivated, have a nice day!

Yes!

Backstabber, how did you know?

It was Terrance's favorite word,

whenever he talked about Jerry.

[laughing]

4, 3, 2, 1!

Ground zero!

What?

Why is WOOHP still standing? [sirens]

[gasp]

JERRY: My spies might have had something to do with that.

[music playing]

Mummy and Daddy thought you showed such promise.

But sadly, misfortune lead you astray.

Misfortune nothing!

It was you!

Indeed, and I can't help feeling

partly responsible for the path your life has taken.

Oh, how magnanimous of you!

So I contacted our old headmaster and confessed.

I'm going to be punished, by repeating the fourth grade.

Ah, finally, a little justice.

But we must all accept responsibility for our actions,

[interposing voices] And you'll do that,

I'm afraid, in a maximum security WOOHP cell.

Farewell, dear brother.

I prefer au revoir.

[laughing]

[music playing]

I can't believe we're getting our promotions!

We didn't even finish our official WOOHP training.

Dean said we totally deserve to be called super spies

because we saved WOOHP.

Well, then I totally deserve a date with Dean.

After all, I did save your life.

Clover, I'd be honored to escort

you to your debutante ball.

Aw. -

[clears throat] Might we attend the business at hand,

your promotions?

Sure!

I say we celebrate our promotions

with a party tonight!

Yeah!

Great idea, Alex!

Ladies, this is a very solemn occasion, and--

[phone rings]

Yes?

Uh, Mother, yes, of course I'm glad to hear from you.

Well, it's just that I'm a little, um, busy right now.

You're here?

At the airport?

Well, I wasn't expecting you till next week.

But I'm-- well, it's very important.

And there's this party later, you see.

And-- yes, Mother, I'll be right there.

[giggling]

Sorry, agents, we'll have to make this brief-- duty calls.

Oh, we understand-- mama's boy!

[gasps]

With these medals, I hereby promote you three

to the level of super spies.

[clapping]

[music playing]

Wow, thank you, Jerry.

Clover.

Um, just to be clear, these are real diamonds

and not rhinestones, right?

Alex.

Ooh, it's kind of heavy.

[laughing]

Mother!

[footsteps running]

Get in here, Dean!

We couldn't have done it without you!

Thanks, girls.

[music playing]

[laughs]

Guard!

Guard!

Jerry?

H-- h-- how did you get in there?

It's my criminal brother, Terrance!

He escaped and locked me in his cell!

We've got to find him before he strikes again!

Sure, boss, whatever you say.

[grunt]

[thud]

[laughing]

[theme music]