Original subtitles

Hello. Welcome to Rocket Burger, home of the Big Bang Burger and Jupiter -sized

fries. How may I help you?

I'll have the Neptuna Melt.

Uh -huh.

Oh, and give me the Saturn Onion Rings.

Excellent choice. May I suggest the Astro Apple Pie for dessert? It's out of

this world.

Yeah. Give me some pie.

Way to push the apple pie, Tia. It's getting a little green.

I thought it was supposed to be that color.

Yeah, good.

That's what you tell the customers.

You know, I've been watching you, and you have real management potential,

the other half of the egg.

Try a lunar lunch, Jake. Can't feed me?

Lettuce, natto, pickles on a slab of meat.

I don't think it's kind of cute, Mr. Woodman.

Maybe, but the lunar lunch is onion, avocado, and bacon on a slab of cod.

I ain't ever gonna let you go.

got an opening at the executive level. How would you like to be my assistant

manager?

Me? Yes.

Assistant manager?

Wow. But what about Mr. Spooner? Isn't he assistant manager?

You mean Pops? He's no longer with the company.

Oh, well, that's too bad. I'd like to send him a nice little note. Do you have

his address?

Mount Bethel Cemetery.

It's the last time I put one of the old guys on playground detail.

Here's your assistant.

Manager shirt.

Wow, the goat shirt.

This wasn't Pops, was it? No, no, he requested to be buried in his.

Anyway, you start tomorrow.

Yes.

Hey, Denise, I hate this job.

If my dog didn't need surgery, I'd bail.

Denise, I've just been promoted to assistant manager.

The old shirt.

So have you told Tamara?

Not yet. It's going to be a way harsh blow to her ego.

I'm excelling and she isn't.

Denise, would you mind telling Tamara about my promotion?

I don't want her to think I'm, you know, rubbing it in.

You are so sensitive.

Hey, Denise. How's your dog?

They're playing in the voice box today, thanks.

They found a donor vehicle.

Listen, I have something to tell you.

What is it?

Woodman chose a new assistant manager.

Oh, no.

Who is it?

It's Tia.

Just take a couple deep breaths.

Yes!

From now on, this is going to be an easy gig.

Tia wouldn't dare boss me around like Pops did.

you're taking my promotion so well. And I want you to know, if you need

anything, I'll be there for you.

Great. Um, can you be there for me tomorrow?

I don't think I'm coming in.

Sure, as long as you have a good excuse.

Of course I do.

There's a Ricky Lake I've gotta see.

Hi, Tia. I'm here to apply for a job.

Why didn't you just come down to Rocket Burger?

What are the chances I'll catch you in your pajamas there?

Fine, Roger. I'll talk to Mr.

Woodman and put in a good word for you, but I'm not promising anything.

Thanks. And by the way, I can handle all the sexual harassment you can dish out.

I am so glad you enjoyed yourself, Lisa.

It's not very many women who can appreciate an organ concerto.

Is that what that was?

All those years hearing it at the roller rink, I never even thought to ask.

And I'm very glad you moved into the mall.

You know, when you walked into my shop, it felt like the faith had sent you

there. Actually, I was sent by the Johnsons from God is the Lord. They said

had a bathroom.

You know, it was my grandfather Frederick's dream to open an organ

Yes, like so many visionaries, though, he was not very good at business.

I was the one who suggested that we expand into the clavichord and spinet

market. Oh, I just love a man who is so passionate about his work.

You want a peanut?

Thank you.

Listen, Lisa, how would you like to come with me to the John Tesh concert Friday

night? I've got great seats.

Actually, I've got a deal on a whole row.

How about it?

Don't you hear enough of that music in the mall?

Hi, Mom.

Guess what?

I just finished... promoted to assistant manager.

Congratulations, honey.

Thanks, Mommy. Good night. Good night, baby.

That's my daughter.

I didn't know you had a daughter. Yeah.

So, anyway, maybe we should do something else besides the John Tush concert. You

know, like, say, anything else?

Hi, Lisa.

Hi, Meg.

Oh, Meg? This is Greg.

Oh, hi there.

Hi.

So,

Who's the guy in the robe?

Oh, he's just a guy I live with. So let's go to the movies. Whoa, wait a

This guy, Ray, who lives here and walks around in a bathrobe, you and he, well,

you know what I mean. You think Ray and I are... No way.

Elisa, have you seen my laundry?

Your underwear is right there on the washing machine, right next to my

pantyhose.

Well, I didn't see them.

Well, lady... Oh, I'll get them.

Excuse me, Greg.

So, are you Lisa's brother?

No.

Good night, Daddy.

Good night, honey.

Here's your underwear, Ray. And next time, don't put that red sweatshirt in

my stuff. Now I got two pink bras.

Well, thank you. Good night, Greg.

He's the dad.

Yeah. And you're a mom.

Uh -huh. And you're not married. Right. I'm out of here.

No, no, wait a minute. That sounds funny. I know, but I can explain it. Oh,

don't bother. I may be an organ salesman, but I'm no fool. Goodbye.

You no fool, huh? You're the one who bought John Tesh tickets.

Roger, what took you so long to clean the woman's bathroom?

I wanted to make a good impression on my first date. And besides, it took me a

while to write my number on all the stalls.

Well, go on. Wash it off.

Oh, I was just kidding.

Go wash it off.

Okay.

Well, that's done. I'm off to a seminar now.

E. coli bacteria.

Don't let it eat away at your profits or your customers.

By the way, I'm expecting a shipment of frozen meat -like patties. Just have

them stack it in the freezer.

Will do, sir.

Well, I'm going to blast off now.

Bye -bye.

your sister.

I hate her too. This hairnet makes me look silly.

through the closing checklist.

I've got to go to the bank and make a deposit.

Denise, do I have this straight?

Close up, go home, leap.

Yeah, that's it.

Okay. I took care of that hole in the wall of the girl's bathroom.

What hole?

Uh, never mind.

I'm off. See you.

Oh, let's get out of here, Denise. Sure. Oh, wait. What about the closing

checklist? Oh.

Okay. Burner off, check. Preach door closed. Check alarm on. Check blah,

blah. Check blah, blah, blah.

Get out of here.

Larry, please, don't play with the... Oh, it's you.

I barely recognized you with clothes on.

Look, Greg, I came down here because I thought I should explain a few things.

There is nothing going on between Lisa and me except two single parents trying

to raise two very different daughters who happen to be twins.

Twins? Right.

You see, Lisa adopted Tia and I adopted Tamara.

We didn't know that they even had a twin sister until they were teenagers and

accidentally bumped into one another down at the mall.

So if you and Lisa want to go out, you should feel perfectly comfortable.

You know, I was going to go over and talk to Lisa.

Good. She'll be glad about that. Until you came in here with that ridiculous

story. Wait, wait, wait.

That story's not all that ridiculous.

Well, it does put on the absurd.

But it is true.

If you'll excuse me, I have a Wurlitzer to re -pipe.

Ray, what are you doing over there?

Well, I... You know, I said I was going to go over and talk to Greg, and, well,

I did, and I... Well, so how'd it go?

Well, it didn't work out too well. As a matter of fact, I think I made matters

worse. I'm sorry.

Oh, well, don't worry about it. I'll just talk to him later.

Oh,

excuse me.

Hello, Fashions by Lisa.

Oh, hi, Lester. It's Lester from security.

Yeah, what's up? Did I illegally park my car...

No, no, that's what I mean. I mean that we don't have twins. I have one and he

has one, but we didn't have them together.

Hello?

Can't be seen with you. Get away from me.

Who's going to see us? The security cameras can see us.

This is ridiculous.

I mean, who would think that I would be the least bit interested in a woman like

you? I know, Ray, but just... Wait a minute.

What's so ridiculous about it?

Nothing. It's just that our backgrounds are so different.

Just forget I said anything, all right?

Oh, no, I know what you're saying. You're saying that you're too good for

No, I am not saying that.

I would never say that I was too good for you.

Of course you would. That would be ridiculous.

I mean, I didn't mean that. What I meant... Yes, you did.

No, really, I... Ray, would you please leave?

I would like to explain.

I think you've made yourself perfectly clear.

If you won't leave, I will.

Lisa,

listen. What I was trying...

So

I'm sitting at the vet with my dog, and this really fine guy, Jason, walks in

with a duck.

What is that awful smell?

It's not really a smell, it's...

It's a stench.

Yeah. It smells like rotting meat -like stuff.

Oh, no.

Denise, please tell me Tamara closed the freezer door before locking up last

night. 2 ,000 meat -like patties ruined.

Why wasn't the freezer door closed?

And from now on, I will make sure that the freezer door is always closed.

Not unless they have a freezer door down at the unemployment office.

What are you saying, sir?

You're fired!

Um, I feel like such a failure.

It was my first real job, and I got fired.

So tell me, what happened at the Rocket Burger?

Some employee did something really stupid.

responsibility.

Well, that is a very admirable quality.

I'm very proud of you, honey.

Thanks, Mom.

By the way, you gonna sell Tamera that you covered for?

Nah. I think I'll just keep it to myself.

Sure call.

Theo, I just found out. I've never been so angry in my life. They can't fire

you. Thanks, Tamera, but it's okay.

See ya.

To protest the injustice that you suffered, I want you to know that I plan

quit. I appreciate that, Roger, but you won't get any points with me.

Well, I gotta get back to work before I get in trouble.

Wait, what were you fired for?

Nothing. Just stuff.

Well, Tia, I just want you to know that I told Mr. Woodman exactly how I felt

about the whole thing.

Tamira, you shouldn't jeopardize your job over me. I told Woodman that he made

gigantic mistake in firing you and that he's gonna have to look long and hard...

to find someone to fill your shoes.

He offered me

personally.

Denise, get out here and clean these tables.

I'm busy and you're right there. Why can't you do it?

Because I'm management in your labor.

And management always tells labor what to do. Now move it! Hup, hup, hup!

Oh, miss, my french fries are cold.

Oh, I'll take care of that personally.

Roger, I need some hot fries.

But I was just going to mop up the girl's bathroom.

Roger, I think five times a day is enough.

Why don't you mop the men's bathroom?

Why, it's dirty in there.

Hi.

What are you doing here?

I came by to pick up my last check.

So, how are things going?

Oh, an executive nightmare.

Last assistant manager left me with nothing but headaches.

Oops, sorry.

Miss, what about my refill you promised me you'd bring an hour ago?

See what I mean?

Maybe I should get my check later.

No, no, no, don't leave.

Stay. Talk.

Bust some tables.

I'll see you at home later.

It's about time.

Taking my break?

We need help at the counter.

Why don't you ever pitch in?

Excuse me?

Is your shirt gold?

Oh, no, it isn't, is it?

But look, my shirt is gold.

I guess that's why I don't have the pitching.

You had a gold shirt, and she always helped out. Well, she was fired. She

obviously didn't have all the answers. Come on.

Tia never should have taken the fall for you.

Excuse me?

Denise, what do you mean by that?

The only reason that Tia got fired was because you forgot to close the freezer

door and ruined all the meat -like patties.

She told Woodman it was her fault.

Dear Ray, there is a delicious leftover pot roast in the fridge, but you can't

have any because it's probably not good enough for you.

Drop dead, Lisa.

I'm not good enough for you, Landry.

Oh, you.

Lisa, this has gone far enough. It's got to stop. We have to rectify the

situation. You know, that means patch things up.

I know what that means.

Oh, see, there I go again, being condescending. You know, talking down to

If you do that one more time, Ray, I will annihilate you. That means, you

kill you.

Listen, Lisa, I've given a lot of thought to what I said. You and I was

You're just as good a person as I am. Well, that's very nice, Ray, but I think

you should stop right there before you go. No, no, I've got something to say,

and I want to say it.

I can understand why people think we're compatible. I mean, after all, you are a

sexy, a beautiful, and intelligent woman.

And I would be lucky to have a woman like you in my life.

Ray, that's so sweet.

Lisa, can I give you a hand with those drinks?

I knew it!

Oh, Greg, wait now! We've got to rectify this, you know? Fix it!

Hi.

How come you're not at work?

I told Mr. Woodman that it was all my fault.

and that I was the one who left the freezer door open and ruined all the

like patties.

Then I quit.

Well, what did Mr. Woodman say?

Yes!

Well, thanks.

You didn't have to do that, you know.

Yes, I did.

I hope you won.

Hey, do you think I can get my job back?

I don't know. It's possible.

I gave you my highest recommendation.

I told Woodman... that you taught me everything I know about running a burger

business.

I'll go apply at the gas.

Whatever.

That's just as well. It was a stupid job anyway. I know.

I wonder what poor Chumpy got to do it.

I quit.

Well, she only started two hours ago.

I know.

I would have quit earlier, but I didn't want it to be obvious. I only took the

job for this cool hat.