Original subtitles

Okay, I just got off the phone with Sarah, and she said that Jamie said that

Debbie said that Barbara said that Katie is coming.

Really? Sarah told me that Jamie said that Brenda said that Barbara said that

Katie won't come if we invite Vicky.

Who's Vicky?

You know, she's the real popular cheerleader with all the boyfriends.

Oh, yeah.

We hate her.

See, we're planning a slumber party.

It's very complicated, but it's gonna be great. Beyond great.

Legendary. Oh!

I even made up a schedule.

A schedule?

She's a real thrill seeker, isn't she?

Okay. Eight to ten, we watch videos.

Ten to eleven -thirty, we do each other's hair. Tia, we don't need a

This is a slumber party.

So what are we going to do?

You know, stay up all night, talk about boys, listen to music, talk about boys,

eat pizza to rehearsal, and talk about boys.

Now that's a good schedule.

Are you doing anyway?

I'm team -proofing the house.

Oh, that's good, Ray. It's like putting away to China before the Manson family

comes.

Hey, we got the best stuff for the party.

Chips, dips, candy, and soda.

Oh, the four major food groups.

You got enough food for everybody?

Feels like it.

Thanks for carrying our stuff back from the store.

Oh, I'm happy to do it. And as a reward, you can invite me to your slumber

party. Roger, you'll be the only boy there.

And that's a bad thing?

Roger, no boys allowed.

It's not fair.

Little Ray is the guy and he gets to go.

He's been fixed.

I don't want to go that bad.

I'll take you girls to the video store as soon as I put the plastic covers over

the furniture.

Not the plastic covers.

Well, I think it's necessary.

I think you're my grandmother.

talking. Well, is there any way you guys could go out tonight and come back

like, uh, Tuesday?

Yeah, we're old enough to be left here alone with our friends.

Well, you don't have to worry about me. I will be out with my Dr. Hank tonight.

Ooh, you got another date with him?

Mm -hmm. This doctor gives me the fever.

Excuse me, uh, this guy's a chiropractor.

Are you supposed to call him a doctor?

Oh, yeah.

Especially if you're dating him.

What about you, Dad? Are you going out tonight?

Uh, I don't think so.

Oh, don't worry. You can hang out with me tonight, Mr. Campbell. We can go

cruising for honey.

You've been having a dry spell lately.

No, thanks, Roger.

I'll have you know I'm doing fine in the honey department.

Uh... Oh, come on, Dad. Go out tonight.

We want you to enjoy your declining years.

Okay, I'll tell you what.

If you behave and prove that you can be trusted...

Next time, you can stay here by yourselves.

Great. We can have the real deal party next week.

I'm available.

Oh, Ray, why don't you call up a lady friend and join us?

Dr. Hank is taking me salsa dancing tonight, and I feel spicy.

And you're giving me heartburn.

I just think I'm going to stay home.

Oh, come on, Ray. Show the girls you have some faith in them.

But I don't. They're 14. That's too young to be left alone.

But 14 is a lot older nowadays than it was for us.

I bet you weren't doing that until you were at least 20.

Hello?

Hank? Oh, you sound terrible, baby. What's wrong?

Oh, no, the flu.

Well, you got to be careful whose back you crack.

Oh, no, of course. You should stay home tonight.

Uh -huh.

Hank, you want me to come over and bring my vaporizer?

We could get nice and steamy.

No? Oh, yeah.

No, no, no, no, no. You're right, you're right.

You should stay home and get your rest. Mm -hmm.

Oh, no, don't worry about me, no.

Oh, I am not disappointed.

Well, maybe just a little.

And then the psycho splits open the guy's head, sucks down all his brains,

says it tastes just like chicken.

Great.

I guess you guys don't want to get the little mermaid, huh?

Dad. Just love this thing and clam.

Party poopers.

Lisa, I'm sorry your date got canceled.

Oh, that's okay.

Yeah, well, we'll have fun tonight with the girls.

You watch the girls.

I'm going to rent She's Got a Heaven, because I'm not getting it.

Remember the Vicky we didn't invite?

I think that's her.

She's coming over here.

Don't say anything about the party. I'm not stupid.

Hi, Vicky.

Oh, hi.

Do you want to come to our summer party tonight?

No, I'd love to, but I'm having my own party tonight.

Bye.

Could you believe her?

She's having a party and didn't even invite us.

So rude.

I just love these old musicals. Fred Astaire, Gene Kelly. How come they don't

make more movies like that?

Because those were the last two white guys who could dance.

Tell you what they should do. They should get somebody like Gregory Himes.

what's Hank doing here?

That's Hank?

He's sick. He's supposed to...

I think he's headed in that direction.

I can't believe this. He lied to me.

Sorry, Lisa. I got to get out of here. Don't be embarrassed by it.

Embarrassed? I'm worried I might insert a cassette where it doesn't belong.

Lisa?

Lisa!

You know, I thought I would come down and rip myself a video, but I'm still

pretty sick, you know. Yeah, I saw your nurse.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I can explain. Well, what's to explain? I think we all

know what's going on here.

Now, Lisa, you have to understand... Oh, there you are, sweetheart.

What?

Um, we're in luck. I found our favorite video for tonight.

Beauty and the Beast?

Yeah, and tonight, I'll be the beast.

You sure hooked up with somebody fast.

Well, if the truth be known, Ray has always been my first choice.

You were just Robin. This here is Batman.

Karen, this is Lisa.

Karen, have you two known each other long?

Um, just a couple of weeks.

Ah, then he hasn't introduced you to Marilyn.

Marilyn? That's the woman living inside of him.

Ready, Honey Munch? Anytime, Cape Crusader.

Nice meeting you, Hank. Yeah. Karen.

Marilyn.

not as good a kisser as Jeff.

You kissed Jeff Russell?

And he lived.

Sarah, what's wrong?

I miss Adam.

Miss him? You'll see him tomorrow.

No. My parents won't let me see him at all anymore.

What happened?

My parents think Adam's a hood, but they're wrong.

I mean, he just got caught spray painting some wall.

What was he writing?

Adam loves Sarah.

Parents mess up everything.

Yep, it's their job.

There must be something we can do. There's nothing.

Hopeless.

What are you wearing?

Mrs.

Labonte's bra.

See, she's really a rich heiress, but he loves her even though he thinks she's

only a waitress.

In real life, Ray, I'm talking about real life. My life.

Oh, that.

At least I'm sorry about what happened.

That wasn't me. The plastic covers.

He did.

But he lied like a dog, that pig.

Is he a dog or a pig?

Worse.

He's a man.

Sometimes a man likes a woman so much that he gets scared. You know, fear of

intimacy. Oh, he wasn't afraid of that.

Couch.

Lisa, you'll meet someone. There are a lot of good men out there.

Oh, yeah, name one.

The Pope.

a nice church going, man.

Just be patient. Love will find you.

Did you ever wonder that there's only one person in the whole wide world you

could be happy with?

Well, I don't know about all that. I mean, there are, what, five and a half

billion people on this earth?

I think there's a good chance you'll meet somebody.

Well, let's talk numbers.

20 % of those men are too young, 20 % are too old, 6 % are jailbirds, and 5 %

are wearing feathers.

Then, you deduct talking miscellaneous cheaters, beaters, and bottom beaters.

That leaves what?

One guy?

Yeah, the Pope.

Thanks for listening, Ray.

That's what fat man's for.

You know my side of the couch don't do that.

I'm a chore.

Somebody's coming.

Check it out.

Wait a minute. Did you hear that? Will you stop it?

No, I'm serious. Somebody's trying to break in.

Shut up.

Oh, my God. There's somebody at the window.

And he's tearing a hat.

Adam?

Adam.

I knew you were here.

I just had to see you.

you're together, but... But you gotta go.

All right.

Look, look, I don't want to get you guys into any trouble.

I just couldn't take it anymore.

I had to see you.

I know, but we gotta say goodbye.

Listen, you guys, I guess it's okay Adam stays.

Really?

Yeah, I'll figure something out. Look, I owe you guys big. You guys are so cool

to do this.

Yeah, we're cool.

That's us.

You know, I think you should stand up to your parents and say, hey, we're not

afraid of you.

if you girls needed anything. No, Mom, we're fine. Oh, good. Then I won't have

to run back downstairs.

Somebody here is very optimistic.

So, what are you guys doing?

Nothing.

Talking about boys, huh?

Oh, you girls are at such a wonderful age.

Everything is so fresh and new, and soon you'll meet that one wonderful boy

who'll just... sweep you off your feet you'll be so happy you walk around

smiling to yourself till one day you walk into that video store and see him

kissing and hugging on another woman and your heart is shattered into a million

pieces you'll scream out

bike a chick aren't you too young to drive a motorcycle no i don't drive i

brought it in case there was a really vicious pillow fight i think somebody

already got to your head baby

a flat -chested girlfriend?

What is a boy doing at your slumber party? I'm sorry, ma 'am, I just...

you even talk to me! And I knew you weren't Debbie.

I want to know who he belongs to.

And I want to know now.

Get the cattle prod, Ray.

Okay, since nobody knows who he is, he must be an intruder.

So I'll just have to call the police. No!

Mm -hmm.

Farrah, I can't believe you did this.

I'm sorry, Mrs. Landry.

Mom... it's not all her fault.

Don't tell me.

Yeah, don't tell her.

We let him stay.

What were you girls thinking about? This is a slumber party for girls only. No

boys allowed.

Okay, I'm going.

Roger, what are you doing here?

Well, when the lights went out, I was afraid you girls were in trouble. So I

came over to protect you.

In the closet?

There's danger everywhere.

But I can see that you're safe now, so I'll just be going.

Anybody want to walk me home? Mrs. Labonte is outside looking for her bro.

And it's not pretty.

How could you do this?

We had to. Their parents wouldn't let them see each other.

So what made you think we would?

Because of something.

What did Lisa say?

Yeah, what did Lisa say?

You know, how you have to meet that one perfect guy and you have to hold on to

him. Or you wind up 33 all alone and miserable.

She told you she was 33?

Poetic license, Ray.

And I said it after the sneak knock -in.

I'm sorry, Mom. We were just trying to help Sarah.

Yeah, they're in love.

The girls are 14 years old. What do you know about love?

Look, I know how I feel.

Adam is the only guy in the whole entire world for me. I can't just make those

feelings go away.

Yeah, but I can make him go away.

Right, right, right.

Let me speak to you just for a second.

Don't move.

Look, you could at least just give him a moment alone to say goodnight.

Need I remind you we are the adults, they are the kids?

Yeah, but love is just as serious as 14 as it is at 33.

You think I was never young?

I was never so in love that I climbed through a girl's window in the rain?

No.

Okay, maybe I didn't, but I thought about it.

Why don't you think about this?

There's so little love in the world. Who are we to just go stomping it out?

Okay, you got one minute.

I want you to work this out with your parents.

You got to know that they have your interest in mind.

You got to know that they have a lot of years of experience with this. You got

to know... Hey,

it's 3 in the morning.

Let's crash.

Yeah. Good night, Tia. Good night, Tamara.

Good night, Sarah.

Good night, Jamie.

Good night, Brenda.

Good night, Katie.

Good night, Debbie.

Good night, girls.