Original subtitles

Are you ready?

I know you see me standing here.

Do I look good, my dear?

Do I look good today?

I'm just another kind of girl.

And you wanna...

I think a carbon -to -carbon double bond is shorter and stronger than a single

carbon... Okay, I'm confused.

Wait. Isn't a double bond an atom with a sigma bond and one pi bond?

I'd like to eat one pi. Can I say something?

Sure.

I hate chemistry!

Hate it!

I just wanted to make that clear.

Why don't you have a french fry? It'll calm me right down.

I'm already full.

And what happened to all your talk about eating healthier food?

What? The french fry made from the potato, a vegetable, dipped in ketchup,

from the tomato, also a vegetable.

So basically, this is like a handheld salad.

What?

You're too funny.

Goodbye. Goodbye.

Good funny.

Here it is.

could learn to dance.

But he escaped like six weeks ago and I thought he was gone forever.

It's my rat.

What's the matter with you?

Nothing! Is experimenting with rodent choreography so weird? Absolutely!

Look, just calm down, relax, and I'll catch the rat.

What?

Are you doing?

He's not going to dance along.

I believe

some of you did very well on your test.

Sadly, many of you did not.

Next time, let's try to have more happilys.

And fewer sadlys.

You're tough, Martin.

Logan?

What do you get?

Who cares?

That bad?

You don't need to be good at chemistry when you're going to be a famous athlete

and or male model.

What if you're good at both? I mean... Well, that was just a crime against

aviation. Good joke.

Bad grade.

And now I'm sad.

Zoe? Oh, man.

Those of you who did poorly are going to have to study a lot harder.

Unless you'd like to be back in this class again next year.

Dismissed.

Miss Bromwell?

What is it, Zoe?

Um, I've never gotten a grade below a B at PCA.

Well, now you have.

Uh, yeah, I know.

So I was hoping maybe I could do some extra credit work, you know, to bring up

my average. I don't believe in extra credit. But I can talk to some of my

students and see if any are interested in tutoring you.

Um, yeah, that'd be great. Thanks.

Oh, Zoe, you're good friends with Chase.

Mm -hmm.

Is his hair naturally that way, or is it a perm?

Um, no, I think it's natural.

Fascinating.

I can't believe you're going to get a tutor.

Might not be so bad. Maybe it'll be a cute guy. Yeah, because chemistry geeks

are so cute.

Hey, I resent that.

Not all people who excel in science are geeks, thank you. She meant boy

chemistry geeks. Yeah, girl chemistry geeks are the coolest.

Your sarcasm is noted.

Just finish building that trap. If I see that rat in this room, I'm moving to

Wisconsin. Yeah, you better kill that furry little beast.

I would never kill a living creature.

Anyway, there's no need to.

The rat will be lured to this wedge of Jarlsberg cheese.

Then, the strobe light will blink rapidly, disorienting him.

Then, a plasma bolt will fire from this chamber, stunning him long enough for me

to grab him and put him safely back in his cage.

So now... We wait.

Hey, why don't you just get Queen to tutor you?

Yeah, we tried that once.

It's so simple.

It's not simple.

Just repeat after me.

Spectroscopy. Spectroscopy. Is the use of the absorption, emission, or

scattering. Is the use of absorption, emission, or scattering.

Of electromagnetic radiation by atoms or molecules to qualitatively or

quantitatively study the atoms or molecules. No.

Now the strobe light should kick on, disorienting him.

It's working.

Now he'll be stunned by the plasma bomb.

It missed.

Zoe, do you have a moment?

Hi. I found you a chemistry tutor. He's one of my best students.

Cool. Who is he?

Well, he... That's peculiar.

He was right over there.

There he is.

Here's Zoe.

Logan? Look, I'm thrilled about this.

Logan doesn't know anything about chemistry. He doesn't know...

Logan happens to be one of my top students.

He got a 100 on the last test.

Did you just say it that loud?

He can't be one of your best students. I mean, no offense, but he's an idiot.

Oh, right, that's it. I didn't want to tutor you anyway.

That wasn't wise. You need him.

He's really one of your best chemistry students?

Consistently.

Ms. Romo?

Hey, Zoe?

That hair cannot be natural.

Logan! Logan!

Logan!

Wait a second.

What? You weren't done insulting me?

I'm sorry, okay? It's just you're like a straight C &D student.

Except for chemistry.

Well, how are you so good at it?

Because my grandfather was a chemistry professor at Caltech.

I had to spend every summer with him when I was a kid. And he taught you?

Against my will. And now I'm cursed with being knowledgeable.

It's so gross.

Well, will you tutor me?

I do.

Where you'll never tell anyone?

Why would I tell anyone? Being tutored by you is humiliating. Good.

We both promise.

No one finds out about this.

Let's shake on it.

Or we can kiss on it.

Or shake.

Okay. A reaction that absorbs energy in the form of heat is?

Endothermic. Good.

And a reaction that releases energy in the form of heat is?

Exothermic. Correct.

And how do you measure the enthalpy change?

Um, it's the energy used from bond -breaking reactions minus the energy

in bond -making products.

Measured in?

Kilojoules. Not bad, Brooke.

You really know chemistry.

You promised not to tell anyone. As long as you promise not to tell anyone

you're tutoring me.

Okay. Okay.

All right, let's talk about isotopes.

Wait, it's almost fine. What if Chase and Michael come back?

No, they'll be shooting hoops in the gym until at least 10.

Okay, isotopes?

That's it. I'm a little embarrassed for you.

This is a sports -related injury.

That makes me cool.

Dude, tripping over a basketball on the way to the bathroom is not cool.

Oh, hey, Quinn and Lola.

Oh, yeah.

What up, females?

Oh, hey.

What have you guys been doing? I've been watching Quinn research rat brains for

the past three hours.

Yeah, you'll change your tone when I trap that rat and lock him away forever.

Uh, what rat?

What happened to your foot?

Ah, sports -related injury, you know.

He tripped over a basketball on his way to pee.

Why don't you broadcast it on the PCA News, huh?

Hey, hey, where's Jeremiah Trotman?

Chase has a breaking story for him. Easy, pal.

Hey, was Zoe with you guys?

No, she went to a movie.

No, she told me she was taking a yoga class.

Who cares?

I gotta go prove to my rat that no rodent can outsmart Quinn Penske.

You ready for me, rat?

Are you ready for a piece of Quinn?

Okay, that's all the chemistry I can handle for one night.

Me too.

Be careful.

Oh. Hi.

Hey. Hello.

What are you guys doing?

Nothing. Talking.

Nothing. What are you guys doing? I thought you were shooting up still 10.

Oh, he was on his way to pee. Hey, quiet.

I thought you were taking a yoga class.

And Lola said you were seeing a movie.

Yeah, it was a movie about yoga, which I came to tell you guys about.

And now that you know, good night.

We gotta see that yoga movie.

All right.

I assume we all know why I've called you here.

Yes, to waste my valuable time while a rogue rat runs hither and yon through my

dorm room mocking my intelligence.

No, we're not here to discuss your rodential problem.

We're here to talk about what's going on between Zoe and Logan.

They've been sneaking around, telling us lies.

I want to know what's up.

Why do you care?

Because I'm a caring person.

See? Look, obviously Zoe and Logan are secretly dating. May I please go catch

rat now?

Yes, go. No! No one's going places till we figure out what's going on.

Now let's consider the possibilities.

I think they're dating. Dating.

The other possibilities.

I've had a chance with over Zoe.

So did I.

What do you mean?

I never had a two -year crush on Zoe.

Right, Michael?

Yes, there was no crush, you silly people.

Then why do you care if Zoe and Logan are dating?

She's not dating Logan, okay? I've known Zoe since the first day she came to

PCA, and I know she'd never date a jerk like Logan. He's one of your best

friends. Which is how I know he's a jerk.

Okay, then.

If Zoe and Logan are sneaking around, spending all this time together, you

me what the other explanations are.

Well, they could...

You know, they could be, uh... I mean, for all we know, uh... I'm gonna go find

out.

I'm gonna go cleanse my pores.

I have a creature to capture.

Am I the only normal person at this school?

I want to know what's going on. I'm just taking pictures of myself like I always

do. See?

I meant I want to know what's going on between you and Zoe.

Why? What do you know?

The two guys have been sneaking around, spending a whole lot of time together.

Why?

Why? Yes, why?

It comes right in between X and Z.

Well, the, uh... The, uh... The truth is, uh...

Zoe and I are dating.

Liar! It's true.

Zoe would never date you. You're... you're you.

Fine. Don't believe it. All right.

I'll go ask Zoe. No.

She's not going to tell you the truth.

Why not?

Because she knew you wouldn't like it.

Ha! You know that makes sense.

I still don't believe it.

Well, you should.

Prove it.

Okay.

I will.

Well, I invented a special nerve gas that should target a rat's central

system. It should put it to sleep for about a half hour, which will render it

catchable. You know, most girls' biggest problem with their roommate is they

borrow their clothes without asking.

I've got one who loses rats, shoots me in the head with plasma bolts, and fills

my room with homemade nerve gas.

Thanks.

Which apparently doesn't work too well.

I'm going to go get some coffee.

Don't you feel lightheaded?

Rousey?

You are smarter than I am.

I can't even make a mild nerve gas that works.

I should just give up science and get a job super low.

Okay.

Now what?

Get in that bush.

No. Get in the bush.

I don't want to be in a bush. I told you. Zoe's never going to admit to you

we're dating. Yeah, because you're not. I will prove it to you if... Here she

comes.

Bush!

All right!

Don't like being pushed.

Hey. Oh, hey. What are you doing here?

Uh, weren't we supposed to meet here at 4 o 'clock?

Yes.

Hey. Hey.

So, where should we go today?

I don't know.

Library? Your room?

Yeah. You know, wherever we can be alone.

Right. Um, you know, I think this is working out pretty good between me and

Don't you think?

Sure. I mean, it's kind of weird, but it's working for me.

Yeah. Listen, I gotta tell you something.

I, uh, I told Chase what's going on between us.

What? I thought we decided no one should know.

He's my friend. I thought he deserved to hear the truth.

You mad?

I guess not. I mean, I hate that I've been lying to Lola and Quinn.

Exactly. We shouldn't have to keep secrets from our friend.

Yeah, I know. It's just chemistry.

Yes, chemistry.

You know, which we have together.

All right.

I've heard enough.

Jake? Jake, what were you doing in that bush?

Cheering. Everything.

Look, I wanted to tell you, but I was embarrassed.

You should be embarrassed.

I mean, Logan?

I know, but he's taught me so much.

Oh, God.

It's true. I mean, he really knows his stuff.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh, God.

Wow, he's really upset you're tutoring him.

Yeah.

I don't feel so bad.

How can I not?

I've been intellectually bested by an animal with a brain the size of a

He won, I lost.

I don't even think the rat knew he was in a competition.

Great. He beat me without even trying.

I'm gonna end up in community college.

Hey.

Hey. I know.

Listen, I've been keeping something from you guys.

Can we talk?

Sure. Let's talk.

See, for the last week or so, I... Look!

Get him!

Why should I even try?

He's brilliant.

I mean, even if I had a superstar... There.

Rat captured.

Don't say that, Blake.

Zoe! That was genius!

Whatever.

Hey.

Hey, Grace.

Listen, Zoe.

Sorry I freaked out on you.

Back there.

Near the bush.

Yeah, what was that about?

I just... I guess it's just kind of hard for me to understand why you would want

to date a guy like Logan. Date him? You think I'm dating Logan?

Well, yeah.

Yeah. Aren't you?

No! Gross! Ew! Why would you think that?

Because you guys have been sneaking around.

I'm lying about it.

And Logan told me you were.

I am not dating Logan.

He's tutoring me in chemistry.

Chemistry?

Oh, my God, Logan?

Logan, seriously?

Oh, that's not true.

Oh, it's true.

Logan is one of my best chemistry students, which is why I asked him to

Zoe. See?

Is that really your hair?

Yes. I doubt it.

Okay. We believe you.

So, why did Logan lie?

Because he thought everyone would rip on him for being a chemistry geek.

Oh, yeah, we'll definitely do that. Yeah. I can't believe he said we were

dating. You should get him back somehow.

Yeah, you should.

Is it ready?

Yep. It's so ready.

Don't worry, little guy.

You'll be fine, Tim.

You put it in his pants?

Yep.

You know, I never would have believed Logan Lee knows chemistry.

He does, big time.

And he's really good at it?

Well, it's not like your level, but yeah, he knows his stuff.

I wonder when he's going to notice the rat in his pants.

Well, how long ago did you guys... Look at my pants!

Oh,

oh, gosh!

I think he noticed.