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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:34,042 --> 00:00:35,999 Good evening folks, hmm... 2 00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:37,416 Good evening you, slags. 3 00:00:37,417 --> 00:00:38,707 No, good evening folks. 4 00:00:38,708 --> 00:00:41,749 So, who is Robbie Williams? 5 00:00:41,750 --> 00:00:43,791 Well, I've been called many things - 6 00:00:43,792 --> 00:00:46,749 narcissistic, punchable, shit-eating twat, 7 00:00:46,750 --> 00:00:48,791 but while I'm all those things, 8 00:00:48,792 --> 00:00:51,583 I wanna show you how I really see myself. 9 00:00:52,000 --> 00:00:54,291 So sit back, relax, 10 00:00:54,292 --> 00:00:58,042 while I give you a right fucking entertaining. 11 00:00:58,958 --> 00:01:02,458 So, the story starts... 12 00:01:03,750 --> 00:01:06,457 1982, Stoke-on-Trent. 13 00:01:06,458 --> 00:01:08,874 The arse-end of the north of England. 14 00:01:08,875 --> 00:01:12,082 It may look grubby and deprived, but deep down, 15 00:01:12,083 --> 00:01:14,249 it was grubby and deprived. 16 00:01:14,250 --> 00:01:15,624 I didn't have much, 17 00:01:15,625 --> 00:01:19,082 but at least I had the respect and admiration of my peers. 18 00:01:19,083 --> 00:01:20,707 - Crystal. - What!? 19 00:01:20,708 --> 00:01:22,499 They just had trouble showing it. 20 00:01:22,500 --> 00:01:24,791 - Robert. - Yes! Come on! 21 00:01:24,792 --> 00:01:26,957 Oi! Right, knobhead! 22 00:01:26,958 --> 00:01:29,249 Pass the ball to Nate and let him do the rest. 23 00:01:29,250 --> 00:01:30,332 Positions! 24 00:01:30,333 --> 00:01:32,999 Oi! The fuck you off to? You're in goal. 25 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:34,707 - But-- - Don't fuck it up. 26 00:01:34,708 --> 00:01:38,624 I'm like a chainmail condom, nothing's getting through. 27 00:01:38,625 --> 00:01:40,082 Whoo! Let's go, slags! 28 00:01:40,083 --> 00:01:41,749 I had plenty of balls. 29 00:01:41,750 --> 00:01:43,957 But I couldn't stop a single one. 30 00:01:43,958 --> 00:01:46,291 I wasn't ready. 31 00:01:46,292 --> 00:01:48,916 - Nice one, dickhead. - Come on! 32 00:01:51,333 --> 00:01:53,541 Robert Williams, captain of Port Vale. 33 00:02:01,083 --> 00:02:03,708 You really are fucking useless, aren't ya? 34 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:07,292 Little bitch! 35 00:02:09,417 --> 00:02:10,582 It's alright, Rob. 36 00:02:10,583 --> 00:02:12,541 Nate, just leave it. 37 00:02:12,542 --> 00:02:16,582 Yeah... Yeah, jog on, you tit. 38 00:02:16,583 --> 00:02:19,666 Right, come on, let's go. 39 00:02:19,667 --> 00:02:22,167 You're a fucking nobody! 40 00:02:24,958 --> 00:02:26,291 See, where I grew up, 41 00:02:26,292 --> 00:02:27,874 you were meant to act small. 42 00:02:27,875 --> 00:02:30,874 But the thing is, my DNA is cabaret. 43 00:02:30,875 --> 00:02:33,082 I came out of the womb with jazz hands. 44 00:02:33,083 --> 00:02:34,874 Which was very painful for my mum. 45 00:02:34,875 --> 00:02:37,291 Heading downstairs for a bit. 46 00:02:37,292 --> 00:02:39,457 One of the barmen's called in sick. 47 00:02:39,458 --> 00:02:41,917 Goodnight, sweetheart. Straight to bed, yeah? 48 00:02:42,917 --> 00:02:44,957 - Don't let him ruin his dinner. - Bye, love. 49 00:02:44,958 --> 00:02:47,042 ♪ And now the end is near ♪ 50 00:02:47,875 --> 00:02:53,417 ♪ And so I face the final curtain ♪ 51 00:02:53,958 --> 00:02:58,624 - ♪ My friend ♪ - ♪ I'll make it clear ♪ 52 00:02:58,625 --> 00:03:00,666 How's about a warm hand on my entrance? 53 00:03:00,667 --> 00:03:02,999 ♪ Of which I'm certain ♪ 54 00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:05,041 ♪ Of which I'm certain ♪ 55 00:03:05,042 --> 00:03:09,458 ♪ I've lived a life that's full ♪ 56 00:03:09,917 --> 00:03:15,125 ♪ I've travelled each and every highway ♪ 57 00:03:15,917 --> 00:03:18,166 - ♪ And more... ♪ - Thank you. 58 00:03:18,167 --> 00:03:20,791 Thank you. Thank you... 59 00:03:20,792 --> 00:03:25,957 ♪ I did it my way ♪ 60 00:03:25,958 --> 00:03:27,874 My dad was well enamoured 61 00:03:27,875 --> 00:03:29,332 by the stars of the day - 62 00:03:29,333 --> 00:03:34,957 Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr and of course, Sinatra. 63 00:03:34,958 --> 00:03:37,499 They were gods to him. 64 00:03:37,500 --> 00:03:42,124 Youth, you hear that? That's pure love, that is. 65 00:03:42,125 --> 00:03:43,917 It don't come cheap, mind. 66 00:03:44,292 --> 00:03:46,957 You've got to risk it all - whatever it takes. 67 00:03:46,958 --> 00:03:48,917 Because if you make it... 68 00:03:49,583 --> 00:03:51,375 ...it's paradise. 69 00:03:51,750 --> 00:03:53,416 Thing is, you can't learn it. 70 00:03:53,417 --> 00:03:55,500 You're either born with it... 71 00:03:57,792 --> 00:03:59,707 ...or you're a nobody. 72 00:03:59,708 --> 00:04:06,416 ♪ And more, much more than this, I did it... ♪ 73 00:04:06,417 --> 00:04:09,458 - Light 'em up! - Light 'em up! 74 00:04:09,667 --> 00:04:14,667 ♪ Yes there were times I guess you knew ♪ 75 00:04:15,042 --> 00:04:19,750 ♪ When I bit off more than I could chew ♪ 76 00:04:20,625 --> 00:04:25,083 ♪ And through it all when there was doubt ♪ 77 00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:30,792 ♪ I ate it up and spit it out ♪ 78 00:04:31,625 --> 00:04:35,957 ♪ I grew tall and through it all ♪ 79 00:04:35,958 --> 00:04:38,582 - Dad! Dad! - ♪ And did it my-- ♪ 80 00:04:38,583 --> 00:04:41,124 Oh, fuck it! Now, look what you've-- 81 00:04:41,125 --> 00:04:42,207 Sorry. 82 00:04:42,208 --> 00:04:43,707 I had a full head of steam then, and all. 83 00:04:43,708 --> 00:04:45,291 - I can fix it. - Get out the way. 84 00:04:45,292 --> 00:04:48,041 - We can sing without it. - It's not the same. 85 00:04:48,042 --> 00:04:49,750 - Or... or we could-- - Robert! 86 00:04:50,208 --> 00:04:52,541 I think it's time for a bath. 87 00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:53,624 But I want to keep going. 88 00:04:53,625 --> 00:04:55,249 Just go with your Nan, will ya! 89 00:04:55,250 --> 00:04:57,082 Come on, love. Come on. 90 00:04:57,083 --> 00:04:59,792 Stupid... Come on, blue eyes... 91 00:05:00,333 --> 00:05:04,083 ♪ My way... ♪ 92 00:05:06,667 --> 00:05:08,792 - Nan? - Hm-mm. 93 00:05:10,667 --> 00:05:13,292 What is... 'it'? 94 00:05:13,500 --> 00:05:15,000 What do you mean? 95 00:05:15,708 --> 00:05:19,208 Dad said you have to be born with 'it'... 96 00:05:19,583 --> 00:05:21,458 ...and maybe I wasn't. 97 00:05:22,167 --> 00:05:27,625 Believe me, whatever 'it' is, you got more than your share. 98 00:05:27,833 --> 00:05:28,916 You're just saying that. 99 00:05:28,917 --> 00:05:30,541 I'm bloody well not. 100 00:05:30,542 --> 00:05:33,500 I wouldn't change a hair on your head. 101 00:05:35,542 --> 00:05:36,917 What is it, love? 102 00:05:38,292 --> 00:05:40,333 I don't want to be a nobody. 103 00:05:40,833 --> 00:05:45,250 Oh, love, there's no such thing as a nobody. 104 00:05:46,417 --> 00:05:47,417 Remember... 105 00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:53,292 This might feel good. 106 00:05:54,208 --> 00:05:55,500 But this... 107 00:05:55,833 --> 00:05:57,375 ...this is what matters. 108 00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:02,375 You're enough. 109 00:06:05,917 --> 00:06:07,416 I was nine years old 110 00:06:07,417 --> 00:06:10,207 when I got my first real taste of the limelight. 111 00:06:10,208 --> 00:06:12,416 And I still remember that taste - 112 00:06:12,417 --> 00:06:16,125 pure, unadulterated terror. 113 00:06:16,625 --> 00:06:18,791 Have you seen the fit one with the big bulge? 114 00:06:18,792 --> 00:06:21,374 After the show, I'm going to touch him 115 00:06:21,375 --> 00:06:23,582 where his bathing suit goes. 116 00:06:23,583 --> 00:06:25,457 I'm going to fuck it up, I know it. 117 00:06:25,458 --> 00:06:28,207 So what? No one will notice. 118 00:06:28,208 --> 00:06:29,625 My dad will. 119 00:06:30,083 --> 00:06:33,541 Just go out there, sing your fucking song and walk off. 120 00:06:33,542 --> 00:06:35,749 That's not enough! He'll see right through me. 121 00:06:35,750 --> 00:06:36,832 What am I going to do? 122 00:06:36,833 --> 00:06:40,249 I don't know. I'm just doing this for the sausage. 123 00:06:42,792 --> 00:06:44,541 In the next three seconds 124 00:06:44,542 --> 00:06:46,999 I'm going to be found out. 125 00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:51,207 They'll see that I'm ugly, I'm stupid, I'm untalented. 126 00:06:51,208 --> 00:06:53,292 I'm not good at anything. 127 00:07:02,250 --> 00:07:03,832 But there is one skill I'd practised 128 00:07:03,833 --> 00:07:06,125 more than any other child in the world. 129 00:07:06,833 --> 00:07:08,874 Light 'em up. 130 00:07:08,875 --> 00:07:10,833 And that's for showing off. 131 00:07:11,625 --> 00:07:14,124 How's about a warm hand on my entrance? 132 00:07:20,042 --> 00:07:21,666 You see, I thought to become famous 133 00:07:21,667 --> 00:07:23,916 you had to be really, really good. 134 00:07:23,917 --> 00:07:27,375 Turns out you just have to show off and be a bit cheeky. 135 00:07:28,042 --> 00:07:30,624 Put your hands together for our next contestant - 136 00:07:30,625 --> 00:07:32,583 Peter Williams. 137 00:07:34,792 --> 00:07:36,167 Thank you very much. 138 00:07:38,333 --> 00:07:41,375 You know the difference between an 'oooh' and an 'aaaah'? 139 00:07:42,250 --> 00:07:43,374 Well, it's about three inches. 140 00:07:46,958 --> 00:07:51,292 ♪ For I am a Pirate King ♪ 141 00:07:52,375 --> 00:07:53,666 I usually go over people's heads. 142 00:07:53,667 --> 00:07:56,083 ♪ It's great to be a Pirate King ♪ 143 00:07:57,792 --> 00:08:00,582 ♪ Oh, naughty... ♪ 144 00:08:00,583 --> 00:08:01,916 ♪ Pirate... ♪ 145 00:08:01,917 --> 00:08:05,749 Oh, ho, oh! Eyes off my bum. 146 00:08:05,750 --> 00:08:08,750 ♪...King ♪ 147 00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:13,542 Ha! 148 00:08:22,958 --> 00:08:24,250 Whoa! 149 00:08:31,208 --> 00:08:32,831 You're useless! 150 00:08:32,832 --> 00:08:34,291 You're a disgrace! 151 00:08:35,750 --> 00:08:38,207 You're a fucking nobody! 152 00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:41,957 Look at you... 153 00:08:45,083 --> 00:08:47,292 I fucking hate you. 154 00:08:48,250 --> 00:08:50,124 My dad won five quid that night. 155 00:08:50,125 --> 00:08:51,750 Oh, you're kidding me! 156 00:08:53,042 --> 00:08:55,500 Although it might as well have been five million. 157 00:08:56,792 --> 00:08:58,541 Thank you very much. 158 00:08:58,542 --> 00:09:02,375 You have been wonderful and I've been Peter Will-- 159 00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:09,167 Conway. I'm Peter Conway! 160 00:09:10,083 --> 00:09:12,292 Not only did he change his name - 161 00:09:12,917 --> 00:09:14,917 he changed his life. 162 00:09:15,917 --> 00:09:18,500 One day he went to watch the FA Cup Final. 163 00:09:19,208 --> 00:09:21,750 Unfortunately, he didn't come back. 164 00:09:23,000 --> 00:09:24,374 The audience beckoned 165 00:09:24,375 --> 00:09:27,999 and he left us to be one step closer to his gods. 166 00:09:29,833 --> 00:09:33,167 ♪ Come on hold my hand ♪ 167 00:09:33,875 --> 00:09:37,333 ♪ I wanna contact the living ♪ 168 00:09:39,125 --> 00:09:43,083 ♪ Not sure I understand ♪ 169 00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:47,500 ♪ This role I've been given ♪ 170 00:09:48,958 --> 00:09:52,292 ♪ I sit and talk to God ♪ 171 00:09:53,167 --> 00:09:57,000 ♪ He just laughs at my plans ♪ 172 00:09:58,667 --> 00:10:05,667 ♪ My head speaks a language I don't understand ♪ 173 00:10:08,667 --> 00:10:15,667 ♪ I just wanna feel real love Feel the love ever after ♪ 174 00:10:17,667 --> 00:10:20,249 ♪ There's a hole in my soul ♪ 175 00:10:20,250 --> 00:10:25,833 ♪ You can see it in my face It's a real big place ♪ 176 00:10:28,042 --> 00:10:35,042 ♪ I need to feel real love and the love ever after 177 00:10:37,458 --> 00:10:39,666 ♪ I cannot get enough ♪ 178 00:10:45,792 --> 00:10:49,333 Don't worry, Mum. We'll be alright. 179 00:10:52,833 --> 00:10:54,500 Light 'em up. 180 00:10:56,917 --> 00:11:03,917 ♪ I just wanna feel real love Feel the home that I live in ♪ 181 00:11:06,667 --> 00:11:08,874 ♪ 'Cause I got too much life ♪ 182 00:11:08,875 --> 00:11:14,625 ♪ Running through my veins going to waste ♪ 183 00:11:16,542 --> 00:11:23,542 ♪ I just wanna feel real love Feel the life ever after ♪ 184 00:11:25,542 --> 00:11:28,041 ♪ There's a hole in my soul ♪ 185 00:11:28,042 --> 00:11:33,458 ♪ You can see it in my face It's a real big place ♪ 186 00:11:35,917 --> 00:11:39,458 ♪ Come on hold my... hand ♪ 187 00:11:39,958 --> 00:11:43,917 ♪ I wanna contact the living ♪ 188 00:11:45,333 --> 00:11:48,333 ♪ Not sure I understand ♪ 189 00:11:49,625 --> 00:11:53,250 ♪ This role I've been given ♪ 190 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:58,417 ♪ Not sure I understand ♪ 191 00:11:59,875 --> 00:12:03,125 ♪ Not sure I understand ♪ 192 00:12:04,542 --> 00:12:08,583 ♪ Not sure I understand ♪ 193 00:12:36,292 --> 00:12:37,875 Next! 194 00:12:39,167 --> 00:12:43,000 Take a pamphlet, sign the form, shut the door on your way out. 195 00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:46,417 No, you're alright. 196 00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:48,457 I know what I'm going to be. 197 00:12:48,458 --> 00:12:49,917 Oh I, what's that then? 198 00:12:50,417 --> 00:12:53,792 Famous! I'm going to sing and dance. 199 00:12:54,833 --> 00:12:56,792 I'm writing lyrics and all. 200 00:12:57,333 --> 00:12:58,874 I've seen your grades, lad. 201 00:12:58,875 --> 00:13:01,208 You couldn't rub two words together. 202 00:13:03,625 --> 00:13:05,707 "The world is mine to claim 203 00:13:05,708 --> 00:13:10,375 "all I need is a fuck load of fame. Ooh, ooh, yeah." 204 00:13:11,833 --> 00:13:14,250 Listen, don't embarrass yourself, yeah? 205 00:13:14,583 --> 00:13:18,875 This is not for you. Keep your feet on the ground. 206 00:13:32,167 --> 00:13:33,625 You might want to frame that. 207 00:13:35,333 --> 00:13:37,166 - Tosser! - Next! 208 00:13:38,333 --> 00:13:40,208 ♪ I've got the power ♪ 209 00:13:47,375 --> 00:13:48,917 ♪ I've got the power ♪ 210 00:13:49,333 --> 00:13:51,749 Oh do it, Nate! 211 00:13:51,750 --> 00:13:53,541 Fuck me! You'd make a fucking awful stripper. 212 00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:55,083 - You know that. - Fuck off. 213 00:13:55,375 --> 00:13:57,417 Oh, that's my backup plan. 214 00:13:58,333 --> 00:13:59,582 Hey, you should come work with me. 215 00:13:59,583 --> 00:14:00,832 Flint's always looking for people. 216 00:14:00,833 --> 00:14:02,749 Isn't he that flashy cunt in the coupe? 217 00:14:02,750 --> 00:14:04,874 Yeah, but he's proper. Double glazing. 218 00:14:04,875 --> 00:14:06,291 Easy job, easy money. 219 00:14:06,292 --> 00:14:07,875 How'd you meet him? 220 00:14:08,375 --> 00:14:10,916 - I shagged his mum. - Fucking hell! 221 00:14:10,917 --> 00:14:12,500 Ah it's alright, he knows. 222 00:14:13,625 --> 00:14:15,500 His dad wouldn't be best pleased though. 223 00:14:16,708 --> 00:14:18,166 Fucking have that! 224 00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:20,791 So have you told him about the trials? 225 00:14:20,792 --> 00:14:22,707 - Nah. - Well, you better. 226 00:14:22,708 --> 00:14:25,082 That scout was fucking excited. 227 00:14:25,083 --> 00:14:27,249 I thought he was going to blow you right there on the pitch. 228 00:14:27,250 --> 00:14:29,832 Fuck off! I'm not going to the trials. 229 00:14:29,833 --> 00:14:32,124 - I'm not going to the trials. - Rubbish. 230 00:14:32,125 --> 00:14:35,042 - I'm not. - What? 231 00:14:35,833 --> 00:14:39,292 Think of the money. The supermodels. 232 00:14:39,708 --> 00:14:41,957 The fans screaming for ya. 233 00:14:41,958 --> 00:14:43,416 Yeah, I don't need all that fancy shit. 234 00:14:43,417 --> 00:14:45,999 - Fucking hell, Nate! - Alright, calm down. 235 00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:48,750 You've got a ticket to heaven and you're going to stay here? 236 00:14:49,375 --> 00:14:51,499 Oh yeah, it's like you with your singing, isn't it? 237 00:14:51,500 --> 00:14:52,749 I just do it 'cause I love it. 238 00:14:52,750 --> 00:14:55,167 Who gives a fuck if you love it? 239 00:14:57,333 --> 00:15:00,500 What matters is that other people love you doing it. 240 00:15:02,583 --> 00:15:04,207 You'll have to get yourself to school. 241 00:15:04,208 --> 00:15:05,666 I can't face it. 242 00:15:05,667 --> 00:15:07,374 I've got a bastard of a headache. 243 00:15:07,375 --> 00:15:09,416 And an exam, which you better have studied for. 244 00:15:09,417 --> 00:15:11,082 Why do you think my head's pounding? 245 00:15:11,083 --> 00:15:12,749 You'lI have more than a pounding head if you haven't. 246 00:15:12,750 --> 00:15:14,374 Oh, I love it when she talks dirty. 247 00:15:15,458 --> 00:15:16,541 You're going. 248 00:15:16,542 --> 00:15:18,957 I'd take you, but I've got a million deliveries. 249 00:15:18,958 --> 00:15:21,082 God knows I've already had one man lounging about... 250 00:15:21,083 --> 00:15:22,582 A music manager in Manchester 251 00:15:22,583 --> 00:15:24,499 is holding auditions for young men 252 00:15:24,500 --> 00:15:27,082 with a keen interest in singing and dancing. 253 00:15:27,083 --> 00:15:28,457 - Don't you bloody shush me. - Mum! Shush... 254 00:15:28,458 --> 00:15:29,582 The man behind the venture, Nigel Martin Smith 255 00:15:29,583 --> 00:15:32,582 is creating a new boy band. 256 00:15:32,583 --> 00:15:34,957 I didn't think you're interested in boy bands. 257 00:15:34,958 --> 00:15:37,791 Mum, quick. Quick. Quick! Write it down. 258 00:15:37,792 --> 00:15:39,291 Head to Vanity Model Agency this Saturday. 259 00:15:39,292 --> 00:15:40,707 - Doors open at 9 AM... - This is it! 260 00:15:40,708 --> 00:15:42,750 This is it! 261 00:15:43,417 --> 00:15:46,249 I'm going to be fucking famous! 262 00:15:46,250 --> 00:15:48,041 Shut up, you tit! 263 00:15:48,042 --> 00:15:50,124 Oh fuck off, Glen! 264 00:15:53,667 --> 00:15:55,374 ♪ Para bailar La Bamba ♪ 265 00:15:55,375 --> 00:15:59,625 ♪ Se necesita una poca de gracia... ♪ 266 00:16:00,167 --> 00:16:03,250 He makes my tizzer go foo, he does. 267 00:16:04,958 --> 00:16:10,875 ♪ Ba, ba, Bamba Ba, ba, bamba ♪ 268 00:16:13,625 --> 00:16:15,125 Thank you. 269 00:16:21,958 --> 00:16:23,583 Light 'em up. 270 00:16:32,292 --> 00:16:33,791 I'm Robert. 271 00:16:33,792 --> 00:16:36,916 Nigel Martin Smith was, for legal reasons, 272 00:16:36,917 --> 00:16:40,291 an absolute sweetheart. 273 00:16:40,292 --> 00:16:41,999 Well, go on then. 274 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:43,708 And a first-class cunt. 275 00:16:50,083 --> 00:16:52,999 ♪ A buzzard took a monkey for a ride in the air ♪ 276 00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:56,166 ♪ The monkey thought that everything was on the square ♪ 277 00:16:56,167 --> 00:16:58,624 ♪ The buzzard tried to throw the monkey off of his back ♪ 278 00:16:58,625 --> 00:17:00,207 ♪ The monkey grabbed his neck ♪ 279 00:17:00,208 --> 00:17:02,375 ♪ and said, "Now listen, Jack" ♪ 280 00:17:02,708 --> 00:17:04,750 ♪ Straighten up and fly right ♪ 281 00:17:05,666 --> 00:17:08,541 ♪ Straighten up and stay right ♪ 282 00:17:08,833 --> 00:17:11,040 ♪ Straighten up and fly right ♪ 283 00:17:11,041 --> 00:17:14,165 ♪ Cool down, Papa, don't you blow your top ♪ 284 00:17:14,166 --> 00:17:16,165 ♪ Ain't no use in divin'-- ♪ 285 00:17:16,166 --> 00:17:17,874 He's bored of you. 286 00:17:17,875 --> 00:17:19,707 Look at you. You've got no talent. 287 00:17:19,708 --> 00:17:22,082 You're not fucking Sinatra. 288 00:17:22,083 --> 00:17:24,874 ♪ Straighten up and fly right ♪ 289 00:17:24,875 --> 00:17:27,457 ♪ Cool down, Papa, don't you blow your top ♪ 290 00:17:27,458 --> 00:17:30,042 Okay, that'll do, lad. 291 00:17:30,417 --> 00:17:33,041 You do know this is a pop band? 292 00:17:33,042 --> 00:17:34,458 Yeah. 293 00:17:34,708 --> 00:17:35,916 Tell you what, I'll do Milli Vanilli's-- 294 00:17:35,917 --> 00:17:37,375 No! 295 00:17:41,208 --> 00:17:42,833 Cheers then. 296 00:17:52,542 --> 00:17:54,541 So, shall we tell them that you found your man 297 00:17:54,542 --> 00:17:56,292 and they can all fuck off home then, yeah? 298 00:17:57,750 --> 00:17:59,291 No, don't you get up. 299 00:17:59,292 --> 00:18:01,667 It'll be my pleasure. 300 00:18:02,083 --> 00:18:04,957 And if I hadn't winked in that moment, 301 00:18:04,958 --> 00:18:06,958 none of this would've happened. 302 00:18:08,250 --> 00:18:10,792 I wouldn't even be here talking to you. 303 00:18:13,042 --> 00:18:14,582 Break a leg, you slags. 304 00:18:14,583 --> 00:18:16,582 Cheeky little bastard. 305 00:18:16,583 --> 00:18:18,416 He wouldn't know talent if it jumped up 306 00:18:18,417 --> 00:18:19,541 and bit him on the cock. 307 00:18:19,542 --> 00:18:21,832 It's only been a few hours, love. 308 00:18:21,833 --> 00:18:23,624 He's got no eye for it, Nan. 309 00:18:23,625 --> 00:18:25,583 You have to wait. 310 00:18:28,375 --> 00:18:29,875 I fucked it. 311 00:18:32,375 --> 00:18:34,208 He saw right through me. 312 00:18:35,292 --> 00:18:36,792 I mean, look at me. 313 00:18:37,667 --> 00:18:39,624 Do I look like a pop star to you? 314 00:18:39,625 --> 00:18:41,875 You look like you always look. 315 00:18:42,750 --> 00:18:43,875 Exactly. 316 00:18:44,333 --> 00:18:48,166 A talentless fuck who's going to die alone and fat 317 00:18:48,167 --> 00:18:51,083 and be craned out of his shitpit in Stoke. 318 00:18:53,375 --> 00:18:55,124 Aaagh... 319 00:18:55,125 --> 00:18:57,832 Fuck, Nan! Hello? 320 00:18:57,833 --> 00:18:59,583 Youth? 321 00:19:00,083 --> 00:19:01,750 Dad. 322 00:19:02,292 --> 00:19:04,707 Um, your voice is so low now. 323 00:19:04,708 --> 00:19:06,542 Thought I had the wrong number. 324 00:19:07,458 --> 00:19:11,249 - How are you, Dad? - Never better. Never better. 325 00:19:11,250 --> 00:19:15,791 Now listen, I haven't got long, but I was thinking - 326 00:19:15,792 --> 00:19:17,583 how about you come visit? 327 00:19:18,042 --> 00:19:19,874 - Really? - Yeah, why not? 328 00:19:19,875 --> 00:19:21,457 School holidays are coming up. 329 00:19:21,458 --> 00:19:23,583 You should come see what the old man's been up to. 330 00:19:24,417 --> 00:19:26,582 That's... I mean, yeah, definitely. 331 00:19:26,583 --> 00:19:29,041 Smashing! Alright, I better go. 332 00:19:29,042 --> 00:19:31,207 A full house waits for no man and all that! 333 00:19:31,208 --> 00:19:33,124 - It'll be good to see ya, lad. - Light 'em up, Dad-- 334 00:19:37,542 --> 00:19:41,333 Oh, Robert... 335 00:19:42,208 --> 00:19:44,207 Come on! 336 00:19:47,792 --> 00:19:50,250 - Oh, love. - Bloody hell, Nan. 337 00:19:50,958 --> 00:19:52,999 Is everybody having a good time? 338 00:19:54,750 --> 00:19:57,832 Peter can't hear you. You having a good time? 339 00:20:00,375 --> 00:20:01,916 I was lucky enough to grace the stage 340 00:20:01,917 --> 00:20:04,416 with this next act at a talent competition. 341 00:20:04,417 --> 00:20:06,791 I'll never forget it. He gave me a five. 342 00:20:06,792 --> 00:20:08,041 Oooh. 343 00:20:08,042 --> 00:20:09,666 Oh, it was sadder than that. 344 00:20:09,667 --> 00:20:11,291 Oooh. 345 00:20:11,292 --> 00:20:12,916 So please put your hands together 346 00:20:12,917 --> 00:20:15,583 for the irresistible... 347 00:20:16,375 --> 00:20:18,958 ...the irrepressible... 348 00:20:19,542 --> 00:20:21,958 ...the irreplaceable... 349 00:20:22,542 --> 00:20:28,207 I give him a ten out of ten - Mr. Terry Swinton. 350 00:20:30,375 --> 00:20:32,042 I've warmed them up for ya. 351 00:20:34,625 --> 00:20:39,292 ♪ Oh the shark has pretty teeth, dear ♪ 352 00:20:40,042 --> 00:20:42,291 I thought I was losing that stage left table for a bit, 353 00:20:42,292 --> 00:20:44,207 but I won them back, didn't I? 354 00:20:44,208 --> 00:20:45,500 Oh yeah. 355 00:20:47,083 --> 00:20:48,667 I'm glad you reached out. 356 00:20:49,375 --> 00:20:51,999 It was a shock, but you know, in a good way. 357 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:54,750 I thought it was about time, youth. 358 00:20:56,458 --> 00:21:00,749 Hey, I forgot to tell you, I'm joining this pop band. 359 00:21:00,750 --> 00:21:03,167 Really? When do you start? 360 00:21:03,375 --> 00:21:05,582 Well, I'm not definitely in yet, but... 361 00:21:05,583 --> 00:21:06,666 Oh... 362 00:21:06,667 --> 00:21:08,082 Well no, it's just that I haven't heard back from-- 363 00:21:08,083 --> 00:21:10,083 - Watch it! - Oh, sorry. 364 00:21:11,417 --> 00:21:14,041 ♪ Now Mack he's spending... ♪ 365 00:21:14,042 --> 00:21:16,250 Terry's the bollocks, isn't he? 366 00:21:16,958 --> 00:21:18,208 Yeah. 367 00:21:20,917 --> 00:21:24,166 Actually, you might want to keep that bed out for me. 368 00:21:24,167 --> 00:21:28,207 Failed my exams - complete fucking balls up. 369 00:21:28,208 --> 00:21:30,833 Mum's going to put me on the first bus back when I tell her. 370 00:21:34,417 --> 00:21:36,083 Fucking hopeless. 371 00:21:37,667 --> 00:21:39,875 You've got to learn from this. 372 00:21:40,375 --> 00:21:41,374 You're right. 373 00:21:41,375 --> 00:21:42,917 All of this. 374 00:21:43,708 --> 00:21:45,958 Because you know, you're learning from the best. 375 00:21:47,833 --> 00:21:51,041 ♪ Look out old Mack is back ♪ 376 00:22:03,625 --> 00:22:05,124 Seeing my dad 377 00:22:05,125 --> 00:22:07,041 surrounded by the stars of yesteryear, 378 00:22:07,042 --> 00:22:10,125 galvanised my need to become famous. 379 00:22:12,333 --> 00:22:14,542 But I had a more immediate problem. 380 00:22:15,042 --> 00:22:16,041 What's Mum going to be like 381 00:22:16,042 --> 00:22:17,875 when I tell her I failed my exams? 382 00:22:18,458 --> 00:22:20,417 Fucked up the rest of my life. 383 00:22:21,708 --> 00:22:24,624 - Did you have a good time? - Yeah. Smashing. 384 00:22:24,625 --> 00:22:27,375 - How is he? - Great. 385 00:22:30,083 --> 00:22:31,624 I, erm... 386 00:22:31,625 --> 00:22:33,332 I've got something to tell you. 387 00:22:33,333 --> 00:22:34,917 So have I. 388 00:22:35,875 --> 00:22:37,375 - I failed... - You're in that band. 389 00:22:37,708 --> 00:22:38,707 What? 390 00:22:38,708 --> 00:22:42,375 You got in! You're in that band. 391 00:22:43,167 --> 00:22:45,166 Yes! 392 00:22:45,167 --> 00:22:46,707 And I never had to tell her 393 00:22:46,708 --> 00:22:49,332 I failed my exams - until now. 394 00:22:49,333 --> 00:22:52,125 Sorry, Mum. 395 00:22:53,458 --> 00:22:56,958 - Shut up, you tit! - Oh fuck off, Glen! 396 00:22:58,500 --> 00:22:59,625 Mother! 397 00:23:04,375 --> 00:23:05,666 Nigel was my introduction 398 00:23:05,667 --> 00:23:06,874 to the adult world. 399 00:23:06,875 --> 00:23:09,874 He was fucking terrifying, like Willy Wonka. 400 00:23:09,875 --> 00:23:11,166 But what did I care? 401 00:23:11,167 --> 00:23:13,624 I was 15, I was going to have four older brothers, 402 00:23:13,625 --> 00:23:16,125 and we were going to take over the world. 403 00:23:16,583 --> 00:23:18,916 Howard Donald, panel beater. 404 00:23:18,917 --> 00:23:23,375 If you got a dent on your car, Howard would pound it out. 405 00:23:24,125 --> 00:23:26,207 Jason Orange was a featured dancer 406 00:23:26,208 --> 00:23:29,291 on a genre-defining TV music show 407 00:23:29,292 --> 00:23:31,833 called 'The Hit Man and Her'. 408 00:23:33,375 --> 00:23:35,292 Mark Owen... 409 00:23:35,833 --> 00:23:39,750 Little Marco was... lovely. 410 00:23:40,125 --> 00:23:42,208 And then of course... 411 00:23:44,417 --> 00:23:45,499 Come here, you. 412 00:23:45,500 --> 00:23:47,749 There was Gary Barlow, 413 00:23:47,750 --> 00:23:49,332 and my first thought was, 414 00:23:49,333 --> 00:23:51,999 who's this dickhead in those trainers? 415 00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:54,125 They are so three years ago. 416 00:23:54,458 --> 00:23:57,374 Gary was a genius. An actual genius. 417 00:23:59,333 --> 00:24:01,207 He'd been playing the working men's clubs 418 00:24:01,208 --> 00:24:02,791 since he was 12 years old 419 00:24:02,792 --> 00:24:05,082 and was earning more money than his teachers. 420 00:24:05,083 --> 00:24:09,833 ♪ A total eclipse of the heart ♪ 421 00:24:10,792 --> 00:24:12,707 Trouble was - Gary sang like an angel, 422 00:24:12,708 --> 00:24:14,541 but he danced like a twat. 423 00:24:16,917 --> 00:24:19,207 ..seven, eight... Hit! Hit! 424 00:24:19,208 --> 00:24:20,791 You gotta bring the energy. Come on! 425 00:24:20,792 --> 00:24:22,333 ...seven, eight... 426 00:24:23,792 --> 00:24:26,458 I recall thinking two things that day - 427 00:24:27,167 --> 00:24:29,582 a fifth of the spotlight is better than nothing, 428 00:24:29,583 --> 00:24:31,249 and... 429 00:24:31,250 --> 00:24:34,332 ...if anyone from Stoke sees me, 430 00:24:34,333 --> 00:24:36,333 I'm fucking dead. 431 00:24:42,167 --> 00:24:43,207 Tikka masalas all round, 432 00:24:43,208 --> 00:24:44,582 no coriander for the boys. 433 00:24:44,583 --> 00:24:46,457 - Thank you. - No coriander? 434 00:24:46,458 --> 00:24:48,082 Whenever Nigel took us out for dinner 435 00:24:48,083 --> 00:24:50,416 he would always say, "I'll put this on your account." 436 00:24:51,500 --> 00:24:54,124 He wasn't joking. He recouped it all. 437 00:24:54,125 --> 00:24:58,042 Look around the table, go on. 438 00:24:59,250 --> 00:25:04,458 In five years, we're all going to hate each other. 439 00:25:06,583 --> 00:25:09,832 But, we'll be fucking rich. 440 00:25:09,833 --> 00:25:11,999 Now, first things first. 441 00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:14,207 We work up our act, we take it on the road. 442 00:25:14,208 --> 00:25:15,749 What about a record deal? 443 00:25:15,750 --> 00:25:18,124 Well, that will come, we'll get your demo sent out, 444 00:25:18,125 --> 00:25:20,082 we'll let the bidding war begin. 445 00:25:20,083 --> 00:25:21,624 Ah but... 446 00:25:21,625 --> 00:25:25,999 Before that, let's sure-up your backstories. 447 00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:29,707 Mark and Jason, you were in a breakdancing group together. 448 00:25:29,708 --> 00:25:32,874 Gary and Howard, you were in a band called, 'The Cutest Rush'. 449 00:25:32,875 --> 00:25:34,207 Was I the lead? 450 00:25:34,208 --> 00:25:36,082 You weren't then, my chicken, and you're not now. 451 00:25:36,083 --> 00:25:38,124 Fuck off! 452 00:25:38,125 --> 00:25:40,499 Robert, you had a bit part in 'Brookside'. 453 00:25:40,500 --> 00:25:41,791 Oh I was fucking great, wasn't I? 454 00:25:41,792 --> 00:25:43,291 You were a bit much, frankly. 455 00:25:45,042 --> 00:25:46,707 Nige, can't we just say I'm a songwriter? 456 00:25:46,708 --> 00:25:48,124 I've got a ton of lyrics. 457 00:25:48,125 --> 00:25:49,832 Well, I can hold my breath for two minutes 458 00:25:49,833 --> 00:25:52,041 but I'm not trying to be a fucking submarine, am I? 459 00:25:56,417 --> 00:25:59,083 Gary writes the songs, yeah? 460 00:25:59,917 --> 00:26:01,667 You lot toe the line. 461 00:26:03,208 --> 00:26:06,917 Oh and also, your name's not Robert anymore - it's Robbie. 462 00:26:09,250 --> 00:26:11,249 I fucking hated the name Robbie 463 00:26:11,250 --> 00:26:13,917 but it was the single best thing Nigel did for me. 464 00:26:14,708 --> 00:26:17,832 Robbie became a character. Something I could hide behind. 465 00:26:17,833 --> 00:26:19,999 Oh now, the name of the band? 466 00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:21,749 Oh Nige, I've got a good one... 467 00:26:21,750 --> 00:26:22,832 Kick It! 468 00:26:22,833 --> 00:26:25,999 That's fucking awful. 469 00:26:27,625 --> 00:26:30,542 I've already got the name and it's brilliant. 470 00:26:30,833 --> 00:26:32,417 And clench! 471 00:26:33,708 --> 00:26:35,833 Take That! 472 00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:39,374 Initially, Nigel's plan was for us to be 473 00:26:39,375 --> 00:26:40,999 a band for the gay scene. 474 00:26:42,417 --> 00:26:44,582 Let's do this. Just remember what you rehearsed. 475 00:26:44,583 --> 00:26:46,291 - Robbie, you alright? - Don't be nervous. 476 00:26:46,292 --> 00:26:48,000 - You all look amazing. - Light 'em up. 477 00:26:48,458 --> 00:26:50,667 Robbie, what you doing? Hurry up. 478 00:26:52,125 --> 00:26:53,874 Now, for years people have rumoured 479 00:26:53,875 --> 00:26:55,499 about my sexuality. 480 00:26:55,500 --> 00:26:57,457 The worst one was that all my gay friends 481 00:26:57,458 --> 00:26:59,416 have slept with me and said I was crap. 482 00:26:59,417 --> 00:27:01,041 I'm not bothered they said I slept with them. 483 00:27:01,042 --> 00:27:03,374 These are my boys! 484 00:27:03,375 --> 00:27:05,249 It's me being 'crap' I'm worried about. 485 00:27:05,250 --> 00:27:06,833 Play it loud! 486 00:27:14,750 --> 00:27:20,417 ♪ Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, yeah, woah, yeah ♪ 487 00:27:21,333 --> 00:27:26,750 ♪ I thought I found love with somebody else's girl ♪ 488 00:27:28,250 --> 00:27:32,207 ♪ Walking 'round feeling so broken-hearted ♪ 489 00:27:32,208 --> 00:27:35,458 ♪ Lost in a different world ♪ 490 00:27:38,917 --> 00:27:41,333 That night I discovered a wonderland. 491 00:27:41,792 --> 00:27:44,792 It was welcoming and non-judgmental. 492 00:27:45,875 --> 00:27:47,916 I'd found my people. 493 00:27:47,917 --> 00:27:50,917 I'd found the promised land. 494 00:27:53,167 --> 00:27:55,416 For the entire first eighteen months 495 00:27:55,417 --> 00:27:58,458 we made 180 pounds, each. 496 00:28:00,708 --> 00:28:03,332 We played gay club after gay club. 497 00:28:03,333 --> 00:28:04,707 Two a night. 498 00:28:04,708 --> 00:28:09,666 Until out of nowhere, Nigel booked us a club full of girls. 499 00:28:09,667 --> 00:28:14,750 ♪ Oh, I see heaven in your eyes with me ♪ 500 00:28:17,333 --> 00:28:21,249 ♪ Now I will give my loving faithfully ♪ 501 00:28:22,542 --> 00:28:24,457 You gonna fucking listen! 502 00:28:24,458 --> 00:28:28,041 Fucking useless prick. I'm warning you! 503 00:28:28,042 --> 00:28:33,875 ♪ Heaven, sweet heaven baby On the wings of love ♪ 504 00:28:34,250 --> 00:28:40,082 ♪ I found heaven, sweet heaven sent your strength to me ♪ 505 00:28:40,083 --> 00:28:43,666 ♪ My sweet sweet baby ♪ 506 00:28:45,667 --> 00:28:46,917 What! 507 00:28:48,458 --> 00:28:51,542 What the fuck! 508 00:29:03,542 --> 00:29:07,707 - Did you hear that? - Settle down. 509 00:29:07,708 --> 00:29:09,749 Will you lot shut up?! 510 00:29:09,750 --> 00:29:11,542 I felt like Elvis, but thin. 511 00:29:11,958 --> 00:29:14,166 I've got good news! 512 00:29:14,167 --> 00:29:15,749 - Good news. - Good news? 513 00:29:15,750 --> 00:29:19,749 We've had some interest from a few record labels... 514 00:29:19,750 --> 00:29:21,874 - Oh, fuck off! - In London. 515 00:29:21,875 --> 00:29:23,624 London! Yes! 516 00:29:23,625 --> 00:29:25,333 That's absolutely fantastic! 517 00:29:25,875 --> 00:29:27,082 Thank you so much. 518 00:29:27,083 --> 00:29:29,917 Yeah, you deserve it. You've all done really well. 519 00:29:31,208 --> 00:29:32,792 Except for one of ya. 520 00:29:36,875 --> 00:29:39,417 And we all know who that is, don't we? 521 00:29:44,875 --> 00:29:47,292 Robbie talked to a local reporter. 522 00:29:48,667 --> 00:29:53,082 "We're like the A-team. I'm the sexy, talented one." 523 00:29:53,083 --> 00:29:54,207 Who the fuck gave you-- 524 00:29:54,208 --> 00:29:55,291 I didn't know she was a reporter, Nige-- 525 00:29:55,292 --> 00:29:56,999 You know, I almost started to like you 526 00:29:57,000 --> 00:29:59,375 but you've fucking ended that, haven't ya? 527 00:30:00,208 --> 00:30:01,291 Fuck off! 528 00:30:01,292 --> 00:30:02,375 What was that? 529 00:30:04,833 --> 00:30:07,957 I think Robbie's developing a sense of humour, Nige. 530 00:30:09,042 --> 00:30:11,707 You think it'd be difficult to go to Stoke-on-Trent, 531 00:30:11,708 --> 00:30:15,708 get another scally with ratty hair and call him Robbie? 532 00:30:17,333 --> 00:30:19,707 Right, the club wants us to do a meet-and-greet. 533 00:30:19,708 --> 00:30:21,416 There's going to be lots of girls in here 534 00:30:21,417 --> 00:30:23,332 so let's get one thing clear - 535 00:30:23,333 --> 00:30:24,707 keep it in your pants. 536 00:30:24,708 --> 00:30:25,832 No touching. 537 00:30:25,833 --> 00:30:27,541 No telephone numbers. 538 00:30:27,542 --> 00:30:29,625 No dating. Ever! 539 00:30:29,875 --> 00:30:30,874 Nige?! 540 00:30:30,875 --> 00:30:32,541 Ever! 541 00:30:32,542 --> 00:30:33,624 What's the point of bringing them up here 542 00:30:33,625 --> 00:30:35,166 - if we can't touch them? - Let's get this done. 543 00:30:35,167 --> 00:30:38,875 Alright! Bring 'em up! 544 00:30:45,208 --> 00:30:46,582 I love you all! 545 00:30:46,583 --> 00:30:48,874 Nigel had many rules for Take That, 546 00:30:48,875 --> 00:30:52,874 and the most important was that we always appeared attainable. 547 00:30:52,875 --> 00:30:54,999 Safe sex is important... 548 00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:57,624 He even made us do a Safer Sex tour 549 00:30:57,625 --> 00:30:59,582 for the Family Planning Association. 550 00:30:59,583 --> 00:31:04,292 So remember. Don't be a fool, cover his tool. 551 00:31:06,208 --> 00:31:08,041 Naturally, I took it all to heart. 552 00:31:08,042 --> 00:31:10,750 Oh, I love the way you move, Gary. 553 00:31:11,375 --> 00:31:13,667 I was happy to play Gary for the moment. 554 00:31:14,542 --> 00:31:16,708 I'll never wash my hands again. 555 00:31:19,417 --> 00:31:21,374 - Oh, my God! - Yeah? 556 00:31:21,375 --> 00:31:23,708 Oh, my God, Hurry up, hurry up! Quick! 557 00:31:24,125 --> 00:31:27,083 - Oh, that's it. - Gary, I already stopped. 558 00:31:27,583 --> 00:31:31,082 And there it was, the one time in Nigel's life, 559 00:31:31,083 --> 00:31:33,542 he wasn't the biggest wanker in the room. 560 00:31:37,833 --> 00:31:40,332 Right. Straight up - 561 00:31:40,333 --> 00:31:43,207 there's no appetite, want or need for boybands. 562 00:31:43,208 --> 00:31:46,667 They died a death. It's all grunge now. 563 00:31:54,375 --> 00:31:56,125 - Did you hear our demo? - Yes. 564 00:32:00,125 --> 00:32:02,874 These boys are going to take this country by storm. 565 00:32:02,875 --> 00:32:04,874 And if you don't sign them right now, 566 00:32:04,875 --> 00:32:06,541 I'll take them to another label 567 00:32:06,542 --> 00:32:09,124 and you'll be the twat that let the biggest band in history 568 00:32:09,125 --> 00:32:11,750 slip through your pudgy fucking fingers. 569 00:32:15,458 --> 00:32:17,582 You won't do any of that, 570 00:32:17,583 --> 00:32:19,457 because everyone else said, "No". 571 00:32:19,458 --> 00:32:21,082 I only agreed to see you 572 00:32:21,083 --> 00:32:24,499 because my daughter saw you boys live, 573 00:32:24,500 --> 00:32:26,957 and she's obsessed. 574 00:32:26,958 --> 00:32:30,583 She assures me that you are amazing in the flesh. 575 00:32:31,208 --> 00:32:32,208 So... 576 00:32:32,958 --> 00:32:36,417 I'm going to take a punt that you're right about these boys. 577 00:32:37,375 --> 00:32:40,792 Now, which one of you is Gary? 578 00:32:43,458 --> 00:32:45,542 That's me, I'm Gary. 579 00:32:48,667 --> 00:32:51,166 ♪ Me with the floorshow kickin' with your torso ♪ 580 00:32:51,167 --> 00:32:53,416 ♪ Boys getting high and the girls even more so ♪ 581 00:32:53,417 --> 00:32:55,457 ♪ Wave your hands if you're not with a man ♪ 582 00:32:55,458 --> 00:32:58,166 ♪ Can I kick it 583 00:32:58,167 --> 00:33:02,249 ♪ I got (funk) You got We got everybody ♪ 584 00:33:02,250 --> 00:33:04,832 ♪ I've got the gift Gonna stick it in the goal ♪ 585 00:33:04,833 --> 00:33:07,957 ♪ It's time to move your body ♪ 586 00:33:07,958 --> 00:33:12,624 ♪ Babylon back in business Can I get a witness ♪ 587 00:33:12,625 --> 00:33:17,291 ♪ Every girl, every man 588 00:33:17,292 --> 00:33:19,624 ♪ Houston, do you hear me? ♪ 589 00:33:19,625 --> 00:33:21,749 ♪ Ground control can you feel me? ♪ 590 00:33:21,750 --> 00:33:24,416 ♪ Need permission to land ♪ 591 00:33:24,417 --> 00:33:29,707 ♪ I don't want to rock, DJ ♪ 592 00:33:29,708 --> 00:33:33,791 ♪ But you're making me feel so nice ♪ 593 00:33:33,792 --> 00:33:39,582 ♪ When's it gonna stop, DJ? ♪ 594 00:33:39,583 --> 00:33:43,000 ♪ 'Cause you're keeping me up all night ♪ 595 00:33:44,333 --> 00:33:46,083 Let's go, boys! 596 00:33:50,042 --> 00:33:51,875 Whoa! 597 00:33:53,958 --> 00:33:56,416 ♪ Singin' in the classes Music for your masses ♪ 598 00:33:56,417 --> 00:33:58,707 ♪ Give no head No backstage passes ♪ 599 00:33:58,708 --> 00:34:00,541 ♪ Have a proper giggle I'll be quite polite ♪ 600 00:34:00,542 --> 00:34:03,457 ♪ But when I rock the mic I rock the mic (right) ♪ 601 00:34:03,458 --> 00:34:05,374 ♪ You got no love, then you're with the wrong man ♪ 602 00:34:05,375 --> 00:34:07,791 ♪ It's time to move your body ♪ 603 00:34:07,792 --> 00:34:09,957 ♪ If you can't get a girl but your best friend can ♪ 604 00:34:09,958 --> 00:34:12,750 ♪ It's time to move your body ♪ 605 00:34:13,292 --> 00:34:17,791 ♪ I don't want to be sleazy Baby, just tease me ♪ 606 00:34:17,792 --> 00:34:22,249 ♪ Got no family planned 607 00:34:22,250 --> 00:34:24,916 ♪ Houston, do you hear me? ♪ 608 00:34:24,917 --> 00:34:27,291 ♪ Ground control, can you feel me? ♪ 609 00:34:27,292 --> 00:34:29,707 ♪ Need permission to land ♪ 610 00:34:29,708 --> 00:34:35,249 ♪ I don't want to rock , DJ ♪ 611 00:34:35,250 --> 00:34:38,750 ♪ But you're making me feel so nice ♪ 612 00:34:39,500 --> 00:34:44,374 ♪ When's it gonna stop! DJ? ♪ 613 00:34:44,375 --> 00:34:48,125 ♪ 'Cause you're keeping me up all night ♪ 614 00:34:50,583 --> 00:34:55,332 ♪ Pimpin' ain't easy Most of them fleece me ♪ 615 00:34:55,333 --> 00:34:57,500 ♪ Every night ♪ 616 00:34:59,875 --> 00:35:02,791 ♪ Pimpin' ain't easy ♪ 617 00:35:02,792 --> 00:35:07,374 ♪ But if you're sellin' it 618 00:35:07,375 --> 00:35:09,958 ♪ It's alright ♪ 619 00:35:16,875 --> 00:35:19,042 ♪ I don't want to rock ♪ 620 00:35:22,042 --> 00:35:25,792 ♪ But you're making me feel so nice ♪ 621 00:35:26,167 --> 00:35:30,458 ♪ When it's going to stop! DJ? ♪ 622 00:35:31,375 --> 00:35:34,875 ♪ 'Cause you're keeping me up all night ♪ 623 00:35:35,375 --> 00:35:37,542 ♪ I don't want to rock ♪ 624 00:35:40,667 --> 00:35:43,332 ♪ But you're making me feel so... ♪ 625 00:35:43,333 --> 00:35:47,167 ♪ You're making me feel so nice ♪ 626 00:35:49,333 --> 00:35:53,917 ♪ I don't want to rock, DJ ♪ 627 00:35:54,667 --> 00:35:58,332 ♪ But you're making me feel so nice ♪ 628 00:35:58,333 --> 00:36:03,042 ♪ When it's going to stop, DJ? ♪ 629 00:36:03,917 --> 00:36:07,916 ♪ 'Cause you're keeping me up all night ♪ 630 00:36:07,917 --> 00:36:10,750 ♪ I don't want to rock ♪ 631 00:36:13,208 --> 00:36:17,082 ♪ But you're making me feel so nice ♪ 632 00:36:17,083 --> 00:36:21,583 ♪ When it's going to stop, DJ? ♪ 633 00:36:22,583 --> 00:36:26,457 ♪ 'Cause you're keeping me up all night ♪ 634 00:36:34,667 --> 00:36:36,582 Every day, there's a new lot. 635 00:36:36,583 --> 00:36:37,832 The coach brings them in. 636 00:36:37,833 --> 00:36:39,166 They come into the garden, 637 00:36:39,167 --> 00:36:40,582 they nick the wood off the fence, 638 00:36:40,583 --> 00:36:41,916 the clothes off the line. 639 00:36:41,917 --> 00:36:43,874 Someone should do something about this. 640 00:36:43,875 --> 00:36:45,749 Mum, they want this to happen. 641 00:36:45,750 --> 00:36:47,041 I went down the post office the other day 642 00:36:47,042 --> 00:36:49,249 and someone called me a posh slag. 643 00:36:49,250 --> 00:36:51,999 Oh love, you're not posh. 644 00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:54,624 It's not funny. I can't make my deliveries anymore. 645 00:36:54,625 --> 00:36:56,041 I'm having to shut the business, Robert. 646 00:36:56,042 --> 00:36:59,625 Guess who's recording the lead vocals for our new song? 647 00:37:00,000 --> 00:37:01,291 Hm-mm. 648 00:37:01,292 --> 00:37:02,666 I'll get us out of this shit hole 649 00:37:02,667 --> 00:37:06,000 and buy us a fortress, just like Gary. 650 00:37:07,458 --> 00:37:09,958 And why would I want a bigger house to hide in? 651 00:37:11,500 --> 00:37:12,749 That was the first time 652 00:37:12,750 --> 00:37:14,166 my mum closed her curtains. 653 00:37:14,167 --> 00:37:17,082 I'm going to bed. If they'll let me. 654 00:37:17,083 --> 00:37:19,666 She didn't open them for another ten years. 655 00:37:19,667 --> 00:37:22,000 Hey, love... 656 00:37:25,750 --> 00:37:28,250 Where's my little Robert gone? 657 00:37:29,458 --> 00:37:31,250 I'm a pop star, Nan. 658 00:37:32,917 --> 00:37:35,667 Fat little Robert isn't going to sell any albums, is he? 659 00:37:37,750 --> 00:37:40,042 I'm just giving the people what they want. 660 00:37:48,375 --> 00:37:51,624 I go onstage and act like a gladiator 661 00:37:51,625 --> 00:37:54,083 and pretend that the whole world is lucky to see me. 662 00:37:56,208 --> 00:37:58,625 And they all act accordingly. 663 00:38:04,833 --> 00:38:06,792 They don't see what I see. 664 00:38:08,458 --> 00:38:10,458 Then stop! 665 00:38:11,250 --> 00:38:13,417 See, that's the craziest thing to me. 666 00:38:14,875 --> 00:38:16,208 I can't. 667 00:38:16,667 --> 00:38:18,417 We love you, Robbie! 668 00:38:25,167 --> 00:38:26,875 Now, fuck off! 669 00:38:28,792 --> 00:38:32,291 I'm here at Take That HQ with the man responsible 670 00:38:32,292 --> 00:38:35,916 for the band's success, Nigel Martin Smith. 671 00:38:35,917 --> 00:38:37,457 It's quite a display. 672 00:38:37,458 --> 00:38:39,999 It is, yeah, yeah. We got Take That dolls, 673 00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:41,749 Take That calendars. 674 00:38:41,750 --> 00:38:44,416 Take That pillows, so you can sleep with Take That. 675 00:38:44,417 --> 00:38:47,417 Just kidding. Probably cut that bit out. 676 00:38:48,292 --> 00:38:51,542 For our ethnic fans we have Take That Babushka Dolls. 677 00:38:51,917 --> 00:38:54,832 Robbie's inside Mark, who's inside Jason. 678 00:38:54,833 --> 00:38:57,749 Jason's inside Howard and they all fit snugly in Gary. 679 00:38:57,750 --> 00:38:58,875 Hmm, that's quite cute. 680 00:39:01,500 --> 00:39:03,000 Lyrics? 681 00:39:04,750 --> 00:39:07,208 Just some ideas. 682 00:39:08,208 --> 00:39:10,792 Well, come on then. Give us a look. 683 00:39:11,917 --> 00:39:12,916 Will I get a credit? 684 00:39:12,917 --> 00:39:15,208 I don't know. Are they any good? 685 00:39:17,917 --> 00:39:19,958 Wouldn't you like to know? 686 00:39:21,500 --> 00:39:23,125 Whatever. 687 00:39:23,625 --> 00:39:25,249 At least pretend to give a toss. 688 00:39:25,250 --> 00:39:26,957 - What, about all this? - Yeah. 689 00:39:26,958 --> 00:39:28,207 Are you kidding? 690 00:39:28,208 --> 00:39:30,666 Do you have any idea how naff people think we are? 691 00:39:30,667 --> 00:39:32,666 Oh fuck off, Robbie, they bloody love us. 692 00:39:32,667 --> 00:39:34,958 Do you think Oasis does this shit? 693 00:39:35,667 --> 00:39:36,707 We need to branch out. 694 00:39:36,708 --> 00:39:39,667 Write something that's not so fucking cringeworthy. 695 00:39:40,208 --> 00:39:41,542 And this coming from you. 696 00:39:42,375 --> 00:39:44,582 The one who only shines when the light's on him. 697 00:39:44,583 --> 00:39:46,541 - Alright, Gaz. - No, no, let him speak. 698 00:39:46,542 --> 00:39:48,042 You think you can just turn up, 699 00:39:48,375 --> 00:39:49,624 scribble some worthless shit 700 00:39:49,625 --> 00:39:52,500 and get your name next to mine in the song credits? 701 00:39:53,250 --> 00:39:56,125 You add nothing to this. 702 00:39:57,000 --> 00:39:58,667 Any of it. 703 00:40:01,125 --> 00:40:05,833 ♪ Turn back the time 'til the days when our love was new ♪ 704 00:40:06,417 --> 00:40:08,292 ♪ Do you remember? ♪ 705 00:40:08,833 --> 00:40:13,166 ♪ No matter what was happening I was there with you-- ♪ 706 00:40:13,167 --> 00:40:15,541 Ah, just ah, hold it there for a second, thanks Robbie. 707 00:40:15,542 --> 00:40:17,041 That was better, yeah? 708 00:40:17,042 --> 00:40:19,416 Ah, you're still a little behind, I'm afraid. 709 00:40:19,417 --> 00:40:21,792 Oof, I've always liked a little behind. 710 00:40:22,125 --> 00:40:25,499 Um, what we might do, Robbie is um, if we record it - 711 00:40:25,500 --> 00:40:27,332 we can just record it line by line, yeah? 712 00:40:27,333 --> 00:40:28,624 And we can just stitch it together later-- 713 00:40:28,625 --> 00:40:30,166 Nah, I can do it all at once. 714 00:40:30,167 --> 00:40:33,208 Yeah, let's just, um, let's just go again. 715 00:40:33,708 --> 00:40:35,291 Yeah, let's go. I got it. 716 00:40:35,292 --> 00:40:38,875 Sure thing then. Here we go. 717 00:40:40,375 --> 00:40:45,124 ♪ Turn back the time 'til the days when our love was new ♪ 718 00:40:45,125 --> 00:40:47,333 ♪ Do you remember? ♪ 719 00:40:48,167 --> 00:40:53,125 ♪ No matter what was happening I was there with you ♪ 720 00:40:53,375 --> 00:40:54,958 ♪ A ha ♪ 721 00:40:55,250 --> 00:40:58,999 ♪ But if we all stand up for what we believe ♪ 722 00:40:59,000 --> 00:41:01,791 ♪ And maybe live within our possibilities ♪ 723 00:41:01,792 --> 00:41:02,874 You're worthless. 724 00:41:02,875 --> 00:41:04,707 You can't do what Gary does. 725 00:41:04,708 --> 00:41:06,542 They're all laughing at ya. 726 00:41:07,167 --> 00:41:09,874 ♪ So baby don't turn away, listen-- ♪ 727 00:41:09,875 --> 00:41:11,957 Ah, that's great. Thanks, Robbie. 728 00:41:11,958 --> 00:41:13,374 Just give us one wee sec, yeah? 729 00:41:13,375 --> 00:41:15,083 Fuck me. 730 00:41:35,208 --> 00:41:37,000 I think we might have it there, mate. 731 00:41:37,500 --> 00:41:38,958 Thank you. 732 00:41:39,542 --> 00:41:41,042 Okay, great. 733 00:41:42,875 --> 00:41:44,833 Yeah, cheers Robbie. 734 00:41:45,917 --> 00:41:48,082 Give it a sec, Gary, before you head in there. 735 00:41:48,083 --> 00:41:49,791 - Oh, my God. - You did your best. 736 00:41:49,792 --> 00:41:52,875 Yeah, you know, and now I feel like the bad guy. 737 00:42:05,833 --> 00:42:07,499 ♪ Turn back the time... ♪ 738 00:42:07,500 --> 00:42:09,332 Gary Barlow, ladies and gentlemen! 739 00:42:11,292 --> 00:42:14,624 It's already good. Fucking hell, the difference! 740 00:42:14,625 --> 00:42:15,791 It's like night and day, isn't it? 741 00:42:15,792 --> 00:42:18,042 Yeah, thank you. 742 00:42:19,333 --> 00:42:21,083 Oh, this is a hit. 743 00:42:26,708 --> 00:42:27,707 I didn't know it 744 00:42:27,708 --> 00:42:29,708 but I was suffering from depression. 745 00:42:30,042 --> 00:42:32,249 I hate that phrase - 'suffering from depression.' 746 00:42:32,250 --> 00:42:34,207 It sounds so Scarlett O'Hara - 747 00:42:34,208 --> 00:42:35,791 "I do declare Mr. Butler, 748 00:42:35,792 --> 00:42:38,249 "I have been suffering with a bout of depression." 749 00:42:38,250 --> 00:42:40,207 'Clinically depressed' is better. 750 00:42:40,208 --> 00:42:41,666 Way more lab coaty. 751 00:42:41,667 --> 00:42:45,041 - Dad! - Here he is! Here he is! 752 00:42:45,042 --> 00:42:46,124 I didn't know you were-- 753 00:42:46,125 --> 00:42:47,582 Oh, my God! 754 00:42:47,583 --> 00:42:48,958 I told you, didn't I? 755 00:42:49,250 --> 00:42:50,457 You owe me a pint, love. 756 00:42:50,458 --> 00:42:53,624 - Can I get a photo? - Of course you can. 757 00:42:53,625 --> 00:42:55,000 I'll take it for you. 758 00:42:55,833 --> 00:42:58,082 Okay, here we go. 759 00:42:58,083 --> 00:43:01,167 - Say 'fuzzy pickle'. - Fuzzy pickle. 760 00:43:01,417 --> 00:43:03,374 - Ah... - Lovely... 761 00:43:03,375 --> 00:43:04,499 Thank you so much. 762 00:43:04,500 --> 00:43:05,749 Did you want one with me in it? 763 00:43:05,750 --> 00:43:07,499 Great idea, yeah! 764 00:43:07,500 --> 00:43:09,207 Yeah, course you do. Come on. 765 00:43:09,208 --> 00:43:11,208 Look at that, hey? Peas in a pod. 766 00:43:13,583 --> 00:43:17,333 Can I lose you... use you... can I use your loo? 767 00:43:17,625 --> 00:43:18,624 Yeah. 768 00:43:18,625 --> 00:43:20,125 It's a number two. 769 00:43:21,000 --> 00:43:22,707 Be my guest. 770 00:43:22,708 --> 00:43:25,458 - Oh, my God! - Yeah... whoa... 771 00:43:28,542 --> 00:43:29,874 She seems nice. 772 00:43:29,875 --> 00:43:32,541 Oh yeah, terrific. Terrific! 773 00:43:32,542 --> 00:43:34,792 You know they've cordoned off the whole street, don't ya? 774 00:43:35,250 --> 00:43:36,499 There's girls everywhere, 775 00:43:36,500 --> 00:43:38,249 and they're not playing nice either. 776 00:43:38,250 --> 00:43:40,208 It's like a bloodsport out there. 777 00:43:41,500 --> 00:43:43,541 I told the security lads you were my son. 778 00:43:43,542 --> 00:43:45,375 I nearly got torn apart. 779 00:43:45,750 --> 00:43:47,041 You in town for long? 780 00:43:47,042 --> 00:43:50,208 No, no, just passing through. Back home tonight. 781 00:43:51,250 --> 00:43:53,125 After I collect my pint. 782 00:43:53,792 --> 00:43:54,874 I wish I'd known you were coming. 783 00:43:54,875 --> 00:43:55,957 What's this? 784 00:43:55,958 --> 00:43:58,042 - Nothing. - Prozac? 785 00:43:59,042 --> 00:44:01,041 What've you got to mope about? 786 00:44:01,042 --> 00:44:04,291 You boys are flying. Bloody Brits nomination... 787 00:44:04,292 --> 00:44:06,167 I've been telling everyone about that. 788 00:44:06,750 --> 00:44:09,167 I know. It's just... 789 00:44:12,042 --> 00:44:13,625 It's all a bit overwhelming, Dad. 790 00:44:15,500 --> 00:44:18,667 It's like I can't keep track of who I am anymore. 791 00:44:19,000 --> 00:44:20,916 Well, go and ask that lot out there. 792 00:44:20,917 --> 00:44:22,958 They know exactly who you are. 793 00:44:23,542 --> 00:44:24,707 The other lads you'd be hard pressed 794 00:44:24,708 --> 00:44:26,374 to pick 'em out of a police line up. 795 00:44:26,375 --> 00:44:29,166 Well, not Gary obviously, 'cause he's the creative one, 796 00:44:29,167 --> 00:44:33,707 but you, you're living the dream, youth. 797 00:44:33,708 --> 00:44:35,332 We love you, Robbie. 798 00:44:35,333 --> 00:44:37,583 How can you not know who you are, 799 00:44:38,417 --> 00:44:41,625 when there are thousands of people screaming your name? 800 00:44:49,667 --> 00:44:51,166 Jesus! Rob! 801 00:44:51,167 --> 00:44:52,957 - What did he take? - Could be anything. 802 00:44:52,958 --> 00:44:54,457 Hold the show until I say. 803 00:44:54,458 --> 00:44:59,207 You were an afterthought. Couldn't sing, couldn't dance. 804 00:44:59,208 --> 00:45:01,875 Looks... five at best. 805 00:45:02,625 --> 00:45:06,708 Everything you have, everything, I've given you. 806 00:45:07,583 --> 00:45:10,375 And you don't deserve any of it. 807 00:45:11,583 --> 00:45:13,292 Oh, fucking hell! 808 00:45:16,875 --> 00:45:18,916 Are you fucking retarded!? 809 00:45:18,917 --> 00:45:20,332 I fucking told them... 810 00:45:20,333 --> 00:45:22,000 Alright! Get in position. 811 00:45:22,417 --> 00:45:25,499 - I said, get in position, now! - Get up, get up! 812 00:45:27,083 --> 00:45:29,416 Wake up, you fucking baby! 813 00:45:29,417 --> 00:45:31,207 Right, follow my lead! 814 00:45:31,208 --> 00:45:33,917 All of this because of a fucking wink. 815 00:45:41,917 --> 00:45:46,375 ♪ Help me escape this feeling of insecurity ♪ 816 00:45:49,208 --> 00:45:50,957 ♪ I need you so much ♪ 817 00:45:50,958 --> 00:45:54,250 ♪ But I don't think you really need me ♪ 818 00:45:56,625 --> 00:46:00,292 ♪ But if we all stand up in the name of love ♪ 819 00:46:00,958 --> 00:46:04,208 ♪ And state the case of what we're dreaming of ♪ 820 00:46:04,667 --> 00:46:08,083 ♪ I've got to say I only dream of you ♪ 821 00:46:08,667 --> 00:46:10,791 ♪ But like a thief in the night ♪ 822 00:46:10,792 --> 00:46:14,750 ♪ You took away the love that I knew ♪ 823 00:46:17,667 --> 00:46:20,957 ♪ Relight my fire ♪ 824 00:46:20,958 --> 00:46:25,042 ♪ Your love is my only desire ♪ 825 00:46:25,417 --> 00:46:32,417 ♪ Relight my fire 'Cause I need your love ♪ 826 00:46:42,042 --> 00:46:43,458 Whoa! 827 00:46:43,875 --> 00:46:46,291 Passed out! That's a new low. 828 00:46:46,292 --> 00:46:47,541 It was a dodgy curry. 829 00:46:47,542 --> 00:46:48,707 Your job is simple - 830 00:46:48,708 --> 00:46:50,832 sing the harmonies and toe the line. 831 00:46:50,833 --> 00:46:52,082 You'd like that, wouldn't ya? 832 00:46:52,083 --> 00:46:53,667 Know your place. 833 00:46:53,958 --> 00:46:55,958 You're making us look like fucking idiots. 834 00:47:00,875 --> 00:47:03,707 ♪ Turn back the times to the days when our love was new ♪ 835 00:47:03,708 --> 00:47:05,750 Oh, fuck! 836 00:47:06,167 --> 00:47:08,042 ♪ Do you remember? ♪ 837 00:47:08,625 --> 00:47:12,499 ♪ No matter what was happening I was there with-- ♪ 838 00:47:12,500 --> 00:47:14,124 ♪ You ♪ 839 00:47:14,125 --> 00:47:15,791 ♪ A ha... ♪ 840 00:47:15,792 --> 00:47:19,292 ♪ But if we all stand up for what we believe ♪ 841 00:47:20,208 --> 00:47:23,000 ♪ And maybe live within our possibilities ♪ 842 00:47:24,417 --> 00:47:27,416 ♪ The world would be wild for the dream ♪ 843 00:47:27,417 --> 00:47:33,333 ♪ So baby, don't turn away Listen to what I gotta say ♪ 844 00:47:36,625 --> 00:47:41,958 ♪ Relight my fire 'Cause I need... ♪ 845 00:47:43,458 --> 00:47:45,583 ♪ Oh, I need... ♪ 846 00:47:47,417 --> 00:47:49,417 ♪ Your love ♪ 847 00:47:58,792 --> 00:48:00,917 ♪ Sun ♪ 848 00:48:02,083 --> 00:48:05,000 ♪ Sun ♪ 849 00:48:07,083 --> 00:48:08,957 Because he writes all the songs, 850 00:48:08,958 --> 00:48:11,291 Gary makes all the money. 851 00:48:11,292 --> 00:48:13,499 He's got a mansion in the north of England 852 00:48:13,500 --> 00:48:15,291 with a driveway full of cars. 853 00:48:15,292 --> 00:48:16,750 Fuck me! 854 00:48:17,042 --> 00:48:18,624 And a butler. 855 00:48:18,625 --> 00:48:21,042 While I'm still living at Mum's. 856 00:48:21,500 --> 00:48:23,125 He's Elton now. 857 00:48:25,583 --> 00:48:27,708 And they're all waiting for me in the garden. 858 00:48:28,083 --> 00:48:29,541 And it's to talk about the problem 859 00:48:29,542 --> 00:48:32,417 - and I am the problem. - Whoa! 860 00:48:41,458 --> 00:48:43,625 Robbie, so um... 861 00:48:45,417 --> 00:48:48,375 Well, we've all been having a think, and um... 862 00:48:48,708 --> 00:48:51,292 We'd quite like to do the next tour as a, ah... 863 00:48:52,958 --> 00:48:54,042 ...as a four piece. 864 00:48:54,667 --> 00:48:56,791 Just to see if we can do it. 865 00:48:56,792 --> 00:48:58,957 Yeah... To see if we can do it. 866 00:48:58,958 --> 00:49:00,124 Perhaps you could focus on 867 00:49:00,125 --> 00:49:02,666 some of that solo material you've been working on or um... 868 00:49:02,667 --> 00:49:04,707 To be honest, Rob, 869 00:49:04,708 --> 00:49:07,000 we've been doing it as a four-piece for a while. 870 00:49:11,208 --> 00:49:12,375 I think you should. 871 00:49:15,667 --> 00:49:17,167 That it, then? 872 00:49:20,208 --> 00:49:21,708 Ah... Yeah... 873 00:49:23,125 --> 00:49:25,917 Weeee... 874 00:49:35,125 --> 00:49:36,583 Can I take this? 875 00:49:38,208 --> 00:49:40,667 Yeah, Rob. If you want. 876 00:49:50,958 --> 00:49:52,333 This is it! 877 00:49:53,083 --> 00:49:56,708 This... is... the end! 878 00:50:25,708 --> 00:50:27,625 Fuck! 879 00:50:27,875 --> 00:50:30,167 Fuck! 880 00:50:46,667 --> 00:50:50,833 ♪ So unimpressed but so in awe ♪ 881 00:50:52,917 --> 00:50:56,792 ♪ Such a saint but such a whore ♪ 882 00:50:58,417 --> 00:51:02,667 ♪ So self aware So full of shit ♪ 883 00:51:04,167 --> 00:51:08,167 ♪ So indecisive So adamant ♪ 884 00:51:08,625 --> 00:51:14,291 ♪ I'm contemplating thinking about thinking ♪ 885 00:51:14,292 --> 00:51:19,083 ♪ It's overrated Just get another drink in ♪ 886 00:51:21,792 --> 00:51:24,374 ♪ Watch me come undone ♪ 887 00:51:24,375 --> 00:51:29,333 ♪ They're selling razor blades and mirrors in the streets ♪ 888 00:51:30,167 --> 00:51:34,875 ♪ I pray that when I'm coming down you'll be asleep ♪ 889 00:51:36,125 --> 00:51:40,332 ♪ If I ever hurt you your revenge will be so sweet ♪ 890 00:51:40,333 --> 00:51:43,999 ♪ Because I'm scum and I'm your son ♪ 891 00:51:45,417 --> 00:51:48,042 ♪ I come undone ♪ 892 00:51:50,625 --> 00:51:54,000 ♪ I come undone ♪ 893 00:51:55,375 --> 00:51:56,874 Fans are still reeling 894 00:51:56,875 --> 00:51:58,332 from the announcement on Monday 895 00:51:58,333 --> 00:52:00,874 that Robbie Williams has split from Take That. 896 00:52:00,875 --> 00:52:03,666 Help Line switch boards, set up after reports of suicides, 897 00:52:03,667 --> 00:52:06,875 have been flooded by tearful Take That fans... 898 00:52:08,417 --> 00:52:10,332 But he had built up a reputation 899 00:52:10,333 --> 00:52:11,457 as a party animal... 900 00:52:11,458 --> 00:52:15,292 ♪ So rock 'n roll So corporate suits ♪ 901 00:52:17,333 --> 00:52:20,792 ♪ So damn ugly So damn cute ♪ 902 00:52:23,292 --> 00:52:26,625 ♪ So well-trained So animal ♪ 903 00:52:29,083 --> 00:52:33,042 ♪ So need-your-love So fuck-you-all ♪ 904 00:52:34,083 --> 00:52:39,666 ♪ I'm not scared of dying I just don't want to ♪ 905 00:52:39,667 --> 00:52:44,832 ♪ If I stopped lying I'd just disappoint you ♪ 906 00:52:44,833 --> 00:52:47,082 ♪ I come undone ♪ 907 00:52:47,083 --> 00:52:51,792 ♪ They're selling razor blades and mirrors in the street ♪ 908 00:52:55,000 --> 00:52:59,708 ♪ I pray that when I'm coming down you'll be asleep ♪ 909 00:53:15,042 --> 00:53:19,541 ♪ If I ever hurt you your revenge will be so sweet ♪ 910 00:53:19,542 --> 00:53:24,083 ♪ Because I'm scum but I'm your son ♪ 911 00:53:24,667 --> 00:53:25,874 ♪ I come un-- ♪ 912 00:53:45,542 --> 00:53:47,207 How could you do this? 913 00:53:47,208 --> 00:53:49,500 We need you, Robbie! 914 00:53:53,458 --> 00:53:55,333 Don't go! 915 00:54:05,250 --> 00:54:06,666 The cheeky member of Take That 916 00:54:06,667 --> 00:54:08,166 is now the fucked-up messy one 917 00:54:08,167 --> 00:54:09,874 who's gone and broken up the band. 918 00:54:11,792 --> 00:54:13,792 And people hate me for it. 919 00:54:15,375 --> 00:54:19,375 But really, they're only saying what I think about myself. 920 00:54:21,000 --> 00:54:22,457 I've a raging cocaine habit, 921 00:54:22,458 --> 00:54:25,750 I'm a full-blown alcoholic and I'm twenty-one. 922 00:54:27,792 --> 00:54:30,832 I think I was always going to be an alcoholic or an addict, 923 00:54:30,833 --> 00:54:33,666 I just had the money and the means to get there quicker. 924 00:54:35,250 --> 00:54:38,458 But I'm also incredibly competitive. 925 00:54:39,792 --> 00:54:41,416 I mean, I've no idea 926 00:54:41,417 --> 00:54:44,125 how I'm going to pull off a solo career. 927 00:54:44,958 --> 00:54:47,125 But there's an energy to revenge, 928 00:54:47,833 --> 00:54:51,250 and it's very, very seductive. 929 00:54:51,667 --> 00:54:54,500 ...eight, seven, six, five... 930 00:54:54,875 --> 00:54:57,832 ...four, three, two, one... 931 00:55:21,917 --> 00:55:23,458 It's going to happen. 932 00:55:23,875 --> 00:55:27,333 No ifs, no buts. No left, no right. Just straight ahead. 933 00:55:34,417 --> 00:55:36,625 I'm going to be fucking massive. 934 00:55:37,500 --> 00:55:39,375 A massive what? 935 00:55:39,917 --> 00:55:42,207 Fuck! You scared the shit out of me. 936 00:55:42,208 --> 00:55:44,083 You said you wanted to be massive? 937 00:55:44,375 --> 00:55:46,458 Ah, well I was just um... 938 00:55:47,042 --> 00:55:48,917 ...wishing for a little extra girth. 939 00:55:52,167 --> 00:55:54,792 - What is it you do? - Oh, yeah... 940 00:55:57,792 --> 00:55:59,624 Oh sorry, should I already know that? 941 00:55:59,625 --> 00:56:01,624 No, no, no, no, no. 942 00:56:01,625 --> 00:56:04,457 No, I'm... I'm a singer and songwriter. 943 00:56:04,458 --> 00:56:05,541 Really? 944 00:56:05,542 --> 00:56:07,332 Yeah, just starting out on my own. 945 00:56:07,333 --> 00:56:08,624 I was in Take That and-- 946 00:56:08,625 --> 00:56:10,042 The boyband? 947 00:56:13,708 --> 00:56:15,042 Oh, don't mind me. 948 00:56:15,500 --> 00:56:16,875 Sorry. 949 00:56:17,125 --> 00:56:21,375 No, you're alright. I mean, it is why I left. 950 00:56:21,792 --> 00:56:23,499 Dancing around in the background 951 00:56:23,500 --> 00:56:25,624 like a camp sadomasochist... 952 00:56:25,625 --> 00:56:27,416 I mean, if I'm going to look like a tosser, 953 00:56:27,417 --> 00:56:29,458 I might as well do it down stage centre. 954 00:56:29,792 --> 00:56:31,041 So it's all about the spotlight? 955 00:56:31,042 --> 00:56:34,374 Wow, not even any lube - just full fist. 956 00:56:34,375 --> 00:56:36,166 I'm just saying - 957 00:56:36,167 --> 00:56:37,416 if you're going to start out on your own, 958 00:56:37,417 --> 00:56:39,375 you might as well be honest about why. 959 00:56:39,917 --> 00:56:42,041 - Shit, are you a journalist? - Fuck, no. 960 00:56:42,042 --> 00:56:43,792 I'm just curious. 961 00:56:45,250 --> 00:56:46,582 I'm not sure you'd understand. 962 00:56:46,583 --> 00:56:47,875 Try me. 963 00:56:51,333 --> 00:56:53,374 You know, I was given the golden ticket 964 00:56:53,375 --> 00:56:55,207 but it felt like I was bound and gagged 965 00:56:55,208 --> 00:56:56,457 for the last five years. 966 00:56:56,458 --> 00:56:58,041 And not in a hot way, either. 967 00:56:58,042 --> 00:57:00,666 In like a battery to the scrotum sort of way. 968 00:57:02,500 --> 00:57:05,667 I don't know, sexy, mysterious, masked lady... 969 00:57:07,083 --> 00:57:08,457 I guess I've just reached a point 970 00:57:08,458 --> 00:57:11,708 where I want to prove I can make it on my own. 971 00:57:12,500 --> 00:57:14,000 Prove to who? 972 00:57:15,583 --> 00:57:17,000 Everyone. 973 00:57:19,750 --> 00:57:22,791 See! I told you you wouldn't understand. 974 00:57:25,833 --> 00:57:27,542 Oh, fuck me! 975 00:57:31,208 --> 00:57:33,125 Nicole Appleton. 976 00:57:33,625 --> 00:57:37,124 She and her sister were members of the girl band, All Saints. 977 00:57:37,125 --> 00:57:39,292 Their manager was a cunt, too. 978 00:57:40,625 --> 00:57:43,082 She was absolutely lovely - 979 00:57:43,083 --> 00:57:45,875 with the single worst taste in men. 980 00:57:47,542 --> 00:57:48,917 Yeah, you alright? 981 00:57:50,792 --> 00:57:53,208 Fame is so fucking weird, isn't it? 982 00:57:55,292 --> 00:57:56,832 It's like that uneasy feeling you get 983 00:57:56,833 --> 00:57:57,957 when they bring the cake out 984 00:57:57,958 --> 00:57:59,874 and the whole restaurant sings Happy Birthday to you 985 00:57:59,875 --> 00:58:02,792 and you can't wait until Happy Birthday stops being sung. 986 00:58:04,958 --> 00:58:07,457 I mean, people are doing a really nice thing, 987 00:58:07,458 --> 00:58:09,582 but you just want it to stop so you can-- 988 00:58:09,583 --> 00:58:11,417 Eat the fucking cake. 989 00:58:13,250 --> 00:58:14,500 Yeah. 990 00:58:20,000 --> 00:58:21,624 Well, now you've got your gag off, 991 00:58:21,625 --> 00:58:23,042 what are you going to say? 992 00:58:24,292 --> 00:58:26,207 - I've got some lyrics. - Oh... 993 00:58:26,208 --> 00:58:27,582 I mean, they're basically different takes 994 00:58:27,583 --> 00:58:28,707 on how much I hate myself. 995 00:58:28,708 --> 00:58:31,499 So a Christmas album then? 996 00:58:31,500 --> 00:58:33,708 I'm not sure about an album. 997 00:58:34,583 --> 00:58:37,208 At the moment I'd just like to write one good song. 998 00:58:38,750 --> 00:58:40,832 - You're overthinking it. - Hmm... 999 00:58:40,833 --> 00:58:43,291 Just write about whatever's in front of you. 1000 00:58:43,292 --> 00:58:44,499 Look... 1001 00:58:44,500 --> 00:58:48,499 ♪ I've got a boat but mine's made of rubber ♪ 1002 00:58:48,500 --> 00:58:54,707 ♪ I cut a hole in the back and use my cock as a rudder ♪ 1003 00:58:54,708 --> 00:58:57,208 Yes! It's a hit! 1004 00:58:58,000 --> 00:59:00,833 See, you're going to be massive in no time. 1005 00:59:03,875 --> 00:59:05,583 ♪ I was her ♪ 1006 00:59:07,000 --> 00:59:08,875 ♪ She was me ♪ 1007 00:59:11,083 --> 00:59:13,375 ♪ We were one ♪ 1008 00:59:15,458 --> 00:59:18,292 ♪ We were free ♪ 1009 00:59:19,375 --> 00:59:24,833 ♪ If there's somebody calling me on ♪ 1010 00:59:28,542 --> 00:59:30,833 ♪ She's the one ♪ 1011 00:59:34,417 --> 00:59:40,499 ♪ If there's somebody calling me on ♪ 1012 00:59:40,500 --> 00:59:42,958 ♪ She's the one ♪ 1013 00:59:47,167 --> 00:59:49,167 ♪ We were young ♪ 1014 00:59:50,083 --> 00:59:53,291 ♪ We were wrong ♪ 1015 00:59:53,292 --> 00:59:58,957 ♪ We were fine all along ♪ 1016 00:59:58,958 --> 01:00:05,332 ♪ If there's somebody calling me on ♪ 1017 01:00:05,333 --> 01:00:07,667 ♪ She's the one ♪ 1018 01:00:12,750 --> 01:00:15,249 ♪ When you get to where you wanna go ♪ 1019 01:00:15,250 --> 01:00:17,707 ♪ And you know the things you wanna know ♪ 1020 01:00:17,708 --> 01:00:22,958 ♪ You're smiling ♪ 1021 01:00:25,417 --> 01:00:27,582 ♪ When you said what you wanna say ♪ 1022 01:00:27,583 --> 01:00:31,249 ♪ And you know the way you wanna play ♪ 1023 01:00:31,250 --> 01:00:38,333 ♪ You'll be so high you'll be flying ♪ 1024 01:00:39,333 --> 01:00:45,457 ♪ Though the sea will be strong ♪ 1025 01:00:45,458 --> 01:00:51,166 ♪ I know we'll carry on ♪ 1026 01:00:51,167 --> 01:00:57,125 ♪ 'Cause if there's somebody calling me on ♪ 1027 01:00:57,792 --> 01:01:00,167 ♪ He's the one ♪ 1028 01:01:03,583 --> 01:01:09,457 ♪ If there's somebody calling me on ♪ 1029 01:01:09,458 --> 01:01:12,250 ♪ She's the one ♪ 1030 01:01:17,708 --> 01:01:19,957 ♪ When you get to where you wanna go ♪ 1031 01:01:19,958 --> 01:01:22,457 ♪ And you know the things you wanna know ♪ 1032 01:01:22,458 --> 01:01:27,958 ♪ You're smiling ♪ 1033 01:01:29,875 --> 01:01:32,207 ♪ When you said what you wanna say ♪ 1034 01:01:32,208 --> 01:01:35,791 ♪ And you know the way you wanna play it ♪ 1035 01:01:35,792 --> 01:01:42,875 ♪ You'll be so high you'll be flying ♪ 1036 01:03:00,583 --> 01:03:03,833 ♪ She's the one ♪ 1037 01:03:05,792 --> 01:03:08,542 ♪ He's the one ♪ 1038 01:03:39,000 --> 01:03:42,417 ♪ You can't manufacture a miracle ♪ 1039 01:03:43,458 --> 01:03:45,792 ♪ The silence was pitiful... ♪ 1040 01:03:49,125 --> 01:03:51,041 It's not a competition, girls. 1041 01:03:51,042 --> 01:03:53,000 It's just hard work. 1042 01:03:55,667 --> 01:03:56,957 Here you are. 1043 01:03:56,958 --> 01:03:58,542 This place is posh as fuck. 1044 01:03:59,167 --> 01:04:01,333 You know, I've just seen fucking Bono in the toilet. 1045 01:04:01,583 --> 01:04:02,708 Had a look... 1046 01:04:03,917 --> 01:04:05,250 ...tiny. 1047 01:04:05,833 --> 01:04:07,749 You've missed me, haven't you? 1048 01:04:07,750 --> 01:04:09,583 Ah, of course you have. 1049 01:04:10,083 --> 01:04:12,292 Hm, hey, so... 1050 01:04:12,792 --> 01:04:14,458 You know my girlfriend, Kayleigh? 1051 01:04:15,875 --> 01:04:16,957 Kayleigh. 1052 01:04:16,958 --> 01:04:18,874 - The one with the club foot? - No, she ain't got a club foot. 1053 01:04:18,875 --> 01:04:20,457 - Well... - Her pelvis is out. 1054 01:04:20,458 --> 01:04:24,625 Anyway, she's up the duff. 1055 01:04:25,667 --> 01:04:27,208 I'm going to be a dad. 1056 01:04:32,667 --> 01:04:34,582 That's amazing. 1057 01:04:34,583 --> 01:04:36,291 I'm just surprised the little thing still works. 1058 01:04:36,292 --> 01:04:37,582 Fuck off! 1059 01:04:37,583 --> 01:04:38,666 Shut up! Shut up! Here it is. 1060 01:04:38,667 --> 01:04:39,749 The wait is over! 1061 01:04:39,750 --> 01:04:43,499 Coming in at number one, it's new, it's brilliant, 1062 01:04:43,500 --> 01:04:46,166 it's "Never Ever" by All Saints. 1063 01:04:56,542 --> 01:04:57,917 Whoa! 1064 01:04:58,333 --> 01:04:59,708 Come on! 1065 01:05:03,500 --> 01:05:05,707 - I can't believe it! - Well done, babe. 1066 01:05:05,708 --> 01:05:09,083 - You deserve it. - It'll be your turn next. 1067 01:05:11,625 --> 01:05:14,292 Nicole, give us a few words! 1068 01:05:18,667 --> 01:05:20,750 Okay. Ahh, I just... 1069 01:05:21,542 --> 01:05:23,124 I can't believe we did it. 1070 01:05:23,125 --> 01:05:24,707 Number fucking one! 1071 01:05:26,417 --> 01:05:28,291 To everyone who has supported us through the years, 1072 01:05:28,292 --> 01:05:30,625 you're family, and we love you. 1073 01:05:35,417 --> 01:05:37,542 And to my... 1074 01:05:38,333 --> 01:05:40,958 Ah, to my best friends... 1075 01:05:41,458 --> 01:05:43,249 Having a number one is amazing 1076 01:05:43,250 --> 01:05:45,624 and getting to celebrate it together is the best. 1077 01:05:45,625 --> 01:05:47,832 Liam Gallagher was the lead singer of Oasis, 1078 01:05:47,833 --> 01:05:49,749 the biggest band on the planet. 1079 01:05:49,750 --> 01:05:52,374 I'm in love with their songs. I'm in love with the lyrics. 1080 01:05:52,375 --> 01:05:55,041 I'm in love with how provocative they are. 1081 01:05:55,042 --> 01:05:56,541 I'm just totally in love with them, 1082 01:05:56,542 --> 01:05:58,583 and I want to be them. 1083 01:05:59,083 --> 01:06:01,041 Fame is a powerful aphrodisiac. 1084 01:06:01,042 --> 01:06:03,875 It means even ugly people can get laid. 1085 01:06:04,500 --> 01:06:07,041 Mind you, guitars do that, too. 1086 01:06:07,042 --> 01:06:08,499 What's all that about, then? 1087 01:06:08,500 --> 01:06:09,582 They got a number one. 1088 01:06:09,583 --> 01:06:11,457 Is that all? Fucking hell. 1089 01:06:11,458 --> 01:06:13,291 If I orgasmed every time I had a number one 1090 01:06:13,292 --> 01:06:14,707 I'd be fucking dry. 1091 01:06:14,708 --> 01:06:15,792 Yeah... 1092 01:06:16,417 --> 01:06:18,124 - You listen to this cunt? - Yeah! 1093 01:06:18,125 --> 01:06:20,541 Like he fucking knows what we're fucking talking about. 1094 01:06:20,542 --> 01:06:21,624 You want a number one, 1095 01:06:21,625 --> 01:06:23,332 you should've stayed Gary's back-up dancer. 1096 01:06:25,083 --> 01:06:26,582 Guess who's had the largest ever demand 1097 01:06:26,583 --> 01:06:29,082 for concert tickets in British history? 1098 01:06:29,083 --> 01:06:30,374 Me. 1099 01:06:30,375 --> 01:06:31,541 And the band-- 1100 01:06:31,542 --> 01:06:33,499 Knebworth, right? 1101 01:06:33,500 --> 01:06:36,166 125,000 fucking screaming cunts. 1102 01:06:36,167 --> 01:06:37,249 That's insane. 1103 01:06:37,250 --> 01:06:40,500 It's how you know you've made it, fucking knobhead. 1104 01:06:40,833 --> 01:06:43,332 Me and Liam wouldn't always be so cuddly. 1105 01:06:43,333 --> 01:06:46,708 Would anybody like to see me fight Liam? 1106 01:06:48,542 --> 01:06:50,957 Liam, a hundred grand of your money - 1107 01:06:50,958 --> 01:06:52,457 a hundred grand of my money. 1108 01:06:52,458 --> 01:06:54,291 We'll get in the ring and we'll have a fight 1109 01:06:54,292 --> 01:06:56,166 and you can all watch it on TV. 1110 01:06:56,167 --> 01:06:57,791 What do you think about that? 1111 01:06:57,792 --> 01:07:00,582 Now are you going to do it or are you going to pussy out? 1112 01:07:00,583 --> 01:07:02,542 You fucking wimp! 1113 01:07:03,167 --> 01:07:04,166 Thankfully, 1114 01:07:04,167 --> 01:07:06,000 he wasn't in the country at the time. 1115 01:07:08,875 --> 01:07:10,208 Knebworth... 1116 01:07:12,000 --> 01:07:13,875 Come on, let's go. This is shit. 1117 01:07:15,708 --> 01:07:17,708 - Nice chatting to you, Noel. - Fuck off, cunt. 1118 01:07:21,875 --> 01:07:24,708 Hey twinkletoes, you coming or what? 1119 01:07:25,583 --> 01:07:26,916 Yeah... 1120 01:07:26,917 --> 01:07:28,375 Come on. 1121 01:07:43,083 --> 01:07:45,000 Good evening, Knebworth. 1122 01:07:45,583 --> 01:07:47,542 You all look gorgeous tonight. 1123 01:07:48,125 --> 01:07:50,167 Here's one from my new album. 1124 01:07:50,750 --> 01:07:52,000 Thank you very much. 1125 01:07:53,417 --> 01:07:55,208 Hiya. 1126 01:07:56,042 --> 01:07:58,749 Fuck me, aren't you Miss Number One 1127 01:07:58,750 --> 01:08:01,167 of the United Kingdom of Britain? 1128 01:08:02,208 --> 01:08:04,625 Maybe. 1129 01:08:05,792 --> 01:08:07,250 And where did you end up? 1130 01:08:07,833 --> 01:08:09,582 I got kidnapped by Liam Gallagher. 1131 01:08:09,583 --> 01:08:10,999 Oh... 1132 01:08:11,000 --> 01:08:13,417 And you looked like you were having a good enough time. 1133 01:08:16,292 --> 01:08:21,000 Anyway, I was just trying to make sense of it. 1134 01:08:22,000 --> 01:08:23,250 Of what? 1135 01:08:24,832 --> 01:08:26,417 Never Ever. 1136 01:08:30,792 --> 01:08:33,624 You don't... What, you don't like our song? 1137 01:08:33,625 --> 01:08:37,167 It's fine. I mean, I'm not sure it's a number one but... 1138 01:08:39,500 --> 01:08:42,081 Well, people seem to like it. 1139 01:08:42,082 --> 01:08:43,791 It would be nice if my fiancé-- 1140 01:08:43,792 --> 01:08:49,375 Screaming, jumping around, making fucking speeches... 1141 01:08:49,707 --> 01:08:51,956 And all that bullshit about family. 1142 01:08:51,957 --> 01:08:54,916 It's not bullshit. It's everything to me. 1143 01:08:54,917 --> 01:08:56,000 Right. 1144 01:08:56,332 --> 01:08:58,206 So did you tell them that you gave up our family 1145 01:08:58,207 --> 01:08:59,832 to get that number one, then? 1146 01:09:01,582 --> 01:09:02,750 Nah... 1147 01:09:03,582 --> 01:09:06,332 I bet you left that bit out of your little speech, didn't you? 1148 01:09:12,292 --> 01:09:13,999 You're so fucking ugly when you're wasted. 1149 01:09:14,000 --> 01:09:15,791 Well, I'll be sober tomorrow. 1150 01:09:15,792 --> 01:09:17,500 Oh, and won't that be nice! 1151 01:09:18,457 --> 01:09:20,999 I can't believe I had to tell everyone that you left tonight 1152 01:09:21,000 --> 01:09:22,416 because something important came up. 1153 01:09:22,417 --> 01:09:23,499 It did. 1154 01:09:23,500 --> 01:09:24,624 Getting fucked up with your mates? 1155 01:09:24,625 --> 01:09:26,792 At least they know how to write a proper number one. 1156 01:09:27,292 --> 01:09:28,624 Which is more than you can. 1157 01:09:28,625 --> 01:09:30,081 Scribbling lyrics in your little notebook, 1158 01:09:30,082 --> 01:09:31,874 but you're too scared to show them to anyone. 1159 01:09:31,875 --> 01:09:35,541 A number one and she's giving out the advice. 1160 01:09:35,542 --> 01:09:38,291 I didn't ask you to lie to your friends, because guess what, 1161 01:09:38,292 --> 01:09:40,624 I don't give a fuck what they think. 1162 01:09:40,625 --> 01:09:43,750 You give a fuck what everyone thinks, Rob. 1163 01:09:44,375 --> 01:09:46,917 That's all you give a fuck about. 1164 01:10:16,333 --> 01:10:18,083 We need crisps. 1165 01:10:19,250 --> 01:10:20,249 We're alright, Nan. 1166 01:10:20,250 --> 01:10:23,125 Well, I don't want you wasting away on me. 1167 01:10:23,458 --> 01:10:25,374 They don't have washing machines in London? 1168 01:10:25,375 --> 01:10:27,958 Yeah, but you do it with love. 1169 01:10:28,208 --> 01:10:29,249 Oh, you bugger. 1170 01:10:29,250 --> 01:10:31,791 You should come home more often, you know. 1171 01:10:31,792 --> 01:10:33,374 She's slowing down. 1172 01:10:33,375 --> 01:10:36,332 Rubbish. Nan'll outlive all of us. 1173 01:10:36,333 --> 01:10:38,499 Anyway, I'm about to be very busy. 1174 01:10:38,500 --> 01:10:39,582 I rang around 1175 01:10:39,583 --> 01:10:42,167 and I've got a meeting with a producer called Guy Chambers. 1176 01:10:43,333 --> 01:10:45,166 Nicole's got a number one. 1177 01:10:45,167 --> 01:10:47,624 Fucking Gary's got number ones, 1178 01:10:47,625 --> 01:10:50,124 and here I am turning into a farmyard animal. 1179 01:10:50,125 --> 01:10:52,957 I wouldn't change a hair on your head. 1180 01:10:52,958 --> 01:10:54,124 Bless you, Nan. 1181 01:10:54,125 --> 01:10:56,666 Now, I spoke to your dad. 1182 01:10:56,667 --> 01:10:58,541 Oh, that makes one of us. 1183 01:10:58,542 --> 01:11:00,166 It's been radio silence since I left the band. 1184 01:11:00,167 --> 01:11:02,791 He's agreed to see you again. 1185 01:11:02,792 --> 01:11:05,124 Agreed? What do you mean? 1186 01:11:05,125 --> 01:11:08,167 Well, to have your visit, on your school holidays. 1187 01:11:15,375 --> 01:11:17,582 He called me, remember? 1188 01:11:17,583 --> 01:11:19,042 He said it'd been too long. 1189 01:11:20,208 --> 01:11:21,249 He invited me. 1190 01:11:21,250 --> 01:11:24,333 Yes, that's right. I told him to. 1191 01:11:25,750 --> 01:11:27,292 You see... 1192 01:11:29,625 --> 01:11:31,999 - Oh, Jesus... - Oh, Betty. 1193 01:11:32,000 --> 01:11:33,667 No, no, no, no... 1194 01:11:34,125 --> 01:11:36,792 I'm so sorry... 1195 01:11:37,625 --> 01:11:39,166 No... 1196 01:11:39,167 --> 01:11:40,874 It's alright... 1197 01:11:40,875 --> 01:11:42,875 Hey Nan, it's alright. 1198 01:11:44,042 --> 01:11:45,332 Come on. Don't cry. 1199 01:11:45,333 --> 01:11:47,125 It's alright... 1200 01:11:48,250 --> 01:11:50,167 Shhh, Betty... 1201 01:11:50,625 --> 01:11:52,374 It's alright, duck. 1202 01:11:52,375 --> 01:11:53,958 I'm sorry. 1203 01:11:57,458 --> 01:11:59,332 ♪ My rhymes complex, yes! ♪ 1204 01:11:59,333 --> 01:12:01,999 ♪ You're just picking up giro cheques, bless ♪ 1205 01:12:02,000 --> 01:12:03,542 ♪ A whole life on the YTS ♪ 1206 01:12:04,667 --> 01:12:05,999 ♪ I line up in a line of nine suspects ♪ 1207 01:12:06,000 --> 01:12:07,832 ♪ And I wine and dine the fine witness ♪ 1208 01:12:07,833 --> 01:12:10,124 ♪ Then she reclines and resigns to my wish list ♪ 1209 01:12:10,125 --> 01:12:12,249 ♪ So I pop it out like the litmus test ♪ 1210 01:12:12,250 --> 01:12:14,082 ♪ And she's like, am I allowed to lick this yet-- ♪ 1211 01:12:14,083 --> 01:12:16,833 Okay, okay! Hang on, hang on. 1212 01:12:18,083 --> 01:12:21,124 Listen, I appreciate you coming over, 1213 01:12:21,125 --> 01:12:22,916 but this isn't going to work. 1214 01:12:22,917 --> 01:12:24,707 Guy Chambers. 1215 01:12:24,708 --> 01:12:27,499 Guy likes it when I talk about the holidays we shared, 1216 01:12:27,500 --> 01:12:30,582 and I like it when he agrees to let me sing our songs. 1217 01:12:30,583 --> 01:12:31,666 You don't mind, do you? 1218 01:12:31,667 --> 01:12:33,583 So our lawyers had a chat... 1219 01:12:34,667 --> 01:12:36,250 And here we are on a beach. 1220 01:12:36,667 --> 01:12:38,292 Um, lower... 1221 01:12:38,708 --> 01:12:40,166 You've only heard half of them. 1222 01:12:40,167 --> 01:12:41,416 And they're all the same. 1223 01:12:41,417 --> 01:12:44,124 I can't even tell when one ends and the next one begins. 1224 01:12:44,125 --> 01:12:45,207 It's like you've written lyrics 1225 01:12:45,208 --> 01:12:47,249 you think other people want to hear. 1226 01:12:47,250 --> 01:12:48,499 I don't know... 1227 01:12:48,500 --> 01:12:50,208 That might be okay in a boyband... 1228 01:12:50,750 --> 01:12:52,207 So you want me to get naked on the first date? 1229 01:12:52,208 --> 01:12:54,291 It's the only way this works. 1230 01:12:54,292 --> 01:12:57,292 Songs are only valuable if they cost you something. 1231 01:13:02,083 --> 01:13:04,750 Luckily, I'm always naked on the first date. 1232 01:13:20,958 --> 01:13:23,500 If you're going to laugh, do it on the inside, yeah? 1233 01:13:24,667 --> 01:13:26,250 I dent easily. 1234 01:13:28,917 --> 01:13:30,500 Can you give me a C? 1235 01:13:34,167 --> 01:13:36,041 ♪ You can't-- ♪ 1236 01:13:36,042 --> 01:13:37,249 Fuck me. 1237 01:13:37,250 --> 01:13:38,917 Better make it a B flat. 1238 01:13:42,958 --> 01:13:47,541 ♪ You can't manufacture a miracle ♪ 1239 01:13:47,542 --> 01:13:53,667 ♪ The silence was pitiful That day ♪ 1240 01:13:56,208 --> 01:14:00,583 ♪ And love is getting too cynical ♪ 1241 01:14:01,292 --> 01:14:06,833 ♪ Passion's just physical These days ♪ 1242 01:14:11,125 --> 01:14:18,125 ♪ You analyse everyone you meet But get no sign, loving kind ♪ 1243 01:14:24,000 --> 01:14:30,250 ♪ Every night you admit defeat and cry yourself blind ♪ 1244 01:14:32,458 --> 01:14:34,832 Ah, this is the chorus. 1245 01:14:34,833 --> 01:14:40,250 ♪ If you can't wake up in the morning ♪ 1246 01:14:40,875 --> 01:14:45,375 ♪ 'Cause your bed lies vacant at night ♪ 1247 01:14:46,833 --> 01:14:52,791 ♪ If you're lost, hurt, tired or lonely ♪ 1248 01:14:52,792 --> 01:14:57,208 ♪ Something beautiful will come your way ♪ 1249 01:14:57,583 --> 01:14:58,832 And the second verse. 1250 01:14:58,833 --> 01:15:00,291 ♪ The DJ-- ♪ 1251 01:15:00,292 --> 01:15:02,000 No, no! Hang on, hang on. 1252 01:15:02,583 --> 01:15:05,374 We have to double the chorus or it'll sound crap. 1253 01:15:05,375 --> 01:15:07,417 What was that list? Lost... 1254 01:15:07,833 --> 01:15:09,332 ♪ ..hurt, tired or lonely... ♪ 1255 01:15:09,333 --> 01:15:11,916 Right, well, that's the hook. That's the gold. 1256 01:15:11,917 --> 01:15:13,707 The 'something beautiful' bit is cream on top. 1257 01:15:13,708 --> 01:15:14,791 You've got... 1258 01:15:14,792 --> 01:15:20,332 ♪ Lost, hurt, tired or lonely ♪ 1259 01:15:25,708 --> 01:15:27,291 And then you repeat. You understand? 1260 01:15:27,292 --> 01:15:28,541 - Yeah. - Right. 1261 01:15:28,542 --> 01:15:29,707 Well, pick it up from the chorus, 1262 01:15:29,708 --> 01:15:31,749 and give it some welly. 1263 01:15:31,750 --> 01:15:34,917 Even if it's shit, you got to make it your shit. 1264 01:15:37,292 --> 01:15:38,874 Two, three... 1265 01:15:38,875 --> 01:15:43,250 ♪ If you can't wake up in the morning ♪ 1266 01:15:43,875 --> 01:15:48,042 ♪ 'Cause your bed lies vacant at night ♪ 1267 01:15:49,208 --> 01:15:54,791 ♪ If you're lost, hurt, tired or lonely ♪ 1268 01:15:54,792 --> 01:15:58,666 ♪ Can't control it Try as you might ♪ 1269 01:15:58,667 --> 01:15:59,999 There you go! 1270 01:16:00,000 --> 01:16:04,333 ♪ May you find that love that won't leave you ♪ 1271 01:16:05,208 --> 01:16:10,042 ♪ May you find it by the end of the day ♪ 1272 01:16:10,375 --> 01:16:15,916 ♪ You won't be lost, hurt, tired or lonely ♪ 1273 01:16:15,917 --> 01:16:20,291 ♪ Something beautiful will come your way ♪ 1274 01:16:20,292 --> 01:16:21,374 One more time. 1275 01:16:21,375 --> 01:16:27,875 ♪ Something beautiful will come your way ♪ 1276 01:16:33,208 --> 01:16:35,292 You're not as crap as I thought. 1277 01:16:36,458 --> 01:16:37,917 Thanks. 1278 01:16:38,500 --> 01:16:40,832 We need to clean it up a bit but it's a start. 1279 01:16:40,833 --> 01:16:43,375 Now, what else have you got in there? 1280 01:16:46,208 --> 01:16:49,832 And coming up we have a surprise guest in the studio. 1281 01:16:49,833 --> 01:16:52,791 It's none other than ex-Take That bad boy, 1282 01:16:52,792 --> 01:16:54,750 Robbie Williams! 1283 01:16:56,750 --> 01:16:59,166 Chris Briggs - manager to the stars. 1284 01:16:59,167 --> 01:17:01,499 Amazingly, he saw something in me... 1285 01:17:01,500 --> 01:17:04,041 I mean, besides monstrous amounts of drugs and booze. 1286 01:17:04,042 --> 01:17:05,666 It'll be nice and intimate. 1287 01:17:05,667 --> 01:17:08,124 Fifty people or so - contest winners, 1288 01:17:08,125 --> 01:17:09,499 so they'll be super excited. 1289 01:17:09,500 --> 01:17:11,457 And just remember it's going out live, 1290 01:17:11,458 --> 01:17:12,916 so mind your 'shits' and 'fucks'. 1291 01:17:12,917 --> 01:17:15,499 You should start with a cover, something people recognise. 1292 01:17:15,500 --> 01:17:17,624 We want them to recognise our songs. 1293 01:17:17,625 --> 01:17:20,416 And they will, but you have to woo them first. 1294 01:17:20,417 --> 01:17:21,791 You got to get me to Knebworth. 1295 01:17:21,792 --> 01:17:22,916 How about you get through this one 1296 01:17:22,917 --> 01:17:24,332 without giving yourself a heart attack? 1297 01:17:24,333 --> 01:17:26,541 Just get me there, alright? 1298 01:17:26,542 --> 01:17:28,624 Baby steps, mate. 1299 01:17:28,625 --> 01:17:31,291 Look, I know this isn't much of a gig, but-- 1300 01:17:31,292 --> 01:17:33,874 Oh, I don't know... Blackpool, Knebworth... Hi! 1301 01:17:33,875 --> 01:17:36,750 Plus, we need the air time. What've you got to lose? 1302 01:17:37,667 --> 01:17:38,666 I would've said my dignity 1303 01:17:38,667 --> 01:17:40,833 but Take That already stole it, so... 1304 01:17:44,708 --> 01:17:48,792 I mean it, Briggsy, I have got to play Knebworth. 1305 01:17:50,208 --> 01:17:51,582 Whatever it takes. 1306 01:17:51,583 --> 01:17:53,500 It'll take everything. 1307 01:17:54,708 --> 01:17:56,458 Sure you're ready for that? 1308 01:18:00,250 --> 01:18:03,417 Then make every performance count. 1309 01:18:07,250 --> 01:18:08,750 Light 'em up. 1310 01:18:12,583 --> 01:18:14,666 One, two, three, four... 1311 01:18:16,333 --> 01:18:21,583 ♪ You got to know how to pony Like Bony Maronie ♪ 1312 01:18:21,792 --> 01:18:26,458 ♪ Do the mashed potato Do the alligator ♪ 1313 01:18:27,375 --> 01:18:32,624 ♪ Put your hands on your hips Let your backbone slip ♪ 1314 01:18:32,625 --> 01:18:37,250 ♪ Do the watusi Like my little Lucy ♪ 1315 01:18:38,083 --> 01:18:40,916 ♪ Na-na-na-na-na na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na ♪ 1316 01:18:42,583 --> 01:18:44,332 You're going to die! 1317 01:18:44,333 --> 01:18:45,707 You've left the safety of the band 1318 01:18:45,708 --> 01:18:47,082 and now you're going out on your own. 1319 01:18:47,083 --> 01:18:48,666 How does that feel? 1320 01:18:48,667 --> 01:18:49,999 I couldn't be happier. 1321 01:18:50,000 --> 01:18:54,249 I'm finally free, you know, and this is only the beginning... 1322 01:18:54,250 --> 01:18:55,833 Come on! 1323 01:18:57,833 --> 01:18:59,707 Well, the first punches have been thrown 1324 01:18:59,708 --> 01:19:01,749 and it's Gary Barlow at number one, 1325 01:19:01,750 --> 01:19:03,874 while Robbie's first album, "Life Thru A Lens" 1326 01:19:03,875 --> 01:19:05,874 has debuted at number eleven. 1327 01:19:05,875 --> 01:19:07,499 Robbie's fate now rests 1328 01:19:07,500 --> 01:19:09,750 on a national charm offensive tour... 1329 01:19:11,583 --> 01:19:13,416 Lock up your daughters, 1330 01:19:13,417 --> 01:19:15,624 lock up your sons. 1331 01:19:15,625 --> 01:19:19,542 It's Robbie Williams! 1332 01:19:20,333 --> 01:19:22,375 You know what I need you to do! 1333 01:19:24,000 --> 01:19:25,416 One, two, three, four... 1334 01:19:25,417 --> 01:19:30,167 ♪ Na-na-na-na-na na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na ♪ 1335 01:19:32,708 --> 01:19:34,582 ♪ Na-- ♪ 1336 01:19:34,583 --> 01:19:38,250 I'm going to rip your fucking eyes out! 1337 01:19:40,167 --> 01:19:42,582 With his new album rocketing up the charts - 1338 01:19:42,583 --> 01:19:45,667 ladies and gentlemen, Robbie Williams! 1339 01:19:46,500 --> 01:19:49,082 Please welcome, Robbie Williams. 1340 01:19:49,083 --> 01:19:50,166 Robbie Williams, ladies and gentlemen... 1341 01:19:50,167 --> 01:19:52,875 He's an international rock star... 1342 01:19:53,167 --> 01:19:56,875 I wanna sing, godamnit! And I wanna dance. 1343 01:19:57,833 --> 01:19:59,082 Being a pop star means 1344 01:19:59,083 --> 01:20:00,666 you can live all your fantasies. 1345 01:20:00,667 --> 01:20:03,332 I think it's what's known as the 'lucky bastard'. 1346 01:20:03,333 --> 01:20:05,207 Well, you know, being in a relationship means 1347 01:20:05,208 --> 01:20:06,958 I've put away me shagging boots, 1348 01:20:07,750 --> 01:20:09,542 but I know where the closet is. 1349 01:20:10,625 --> 01:20:14,750 ♪ Dance with me, honey Like long tall Sally ♪ 1350 01:20:16,167 --> 01:20:17,416 You know the great thing is 1351 01:20:17,417 --> 01:20:19,749 I've actually arrive now, because back at home 1352 01:20:19,750 --> 01:20:21,499 I've been voted the 'Rear of the Year'. 1353 01:20:21,500 --> 01:20:23,874 Is that right! You gonna show us? 1354 01:20:23,875 --> 01:20:26,457 So it's fair to say you're box office, right? 1355 01:20:26,458 --> 01:20:28,082 I've got me platinum disc 1356 01:20:28,083 --> 01:20:30,832 and then I'm getting a double platinum disc now. 1357 01:20:30,833 --> 01:20:33,208 It means I'm very famous. 1358 01:20:33,625 --> 01:20:37,791 ♪ One, two, na-na-na- na-na-na-na ♪ 1359 01:20:37,792 --> 01:20:39,582 We are coming for you! 1360 01:20:39,583 --> 01:20:42,082 You haven't got 'it', you've got nothing! 1361 01:20:43,708 --> 01:20:46,333 You are fucking dead! 1362 01:20:53,542 --> 01:20:55,042 Light 'em up! 1363 01:21:05,167 --> 01:21:07,000 Fuck off, the lot of ya! 1364 01:21:13,250 --> 01:21:15,082 ♪ Na-na-na-na-na ♪ 1365 01:21:15,083 --> 01:21:18,124 And the winner is... Robbie Williams. 1366 01:21:18,125 --> 01:21:20,041 - ...Robbie Williams! - ...it's Robbie Williams! 1367 01:21:20,042 --> 01:21:22,124 ...and the winner is Robbie Williams! 1368 01:21:22,125 --> 01:21:23,541 - Robbie Williams... - Robbie Williams! 1369 01:21:23,542 --> 01:21:25,582 A perfect end to a great night 1370 01:21:25,583 --> 01:21:26,832 for Robbie Williams. 1371 01:21:30,125 --> 01:21:32,499 I'm sure you all recognise this young man, 1372 01:21:32,500 --> 01:21:34,124 but did you know he had a famous father-- 1373 01:21:34,125 --> 01:21:35,541 No! 1374 01:21:35,542 --> 01:21:37,041 If any of you lovely ladies want to come up 1375 01:21:37,042 --> 01:21:38,707 and sit on Santa's knee, 1376 01:21:38,708 --> 01:21:40,582 I'll see what I've got in my sack for you. 1377 01:21:43,958 --> 01:21:44,958 Rob!? 1378 01:21:49,708 --> 01:21:51,042 Brrrr... 1379 01:21:52,000 --> 01:21:53,583 Light 'em up. 1380 01:21:57,667 --> 01:21:59,082 Whoa! 1381 01:21:59,083 --> 01:22:01,332 ♪ You gotta mash potato ♪ 1382 01:22:01,333 --> 01:22:03,500 ♪ Do the alligator ♪ 1383 01:22:05,375 --> 01:22:07,916 We're going to peel your skin off. 1384 01:22:07,917 --> 01:22:09,374 Slit your throat. 1385 01:22:09,375 --> 01:22:10,999 We are going to fucking murder you! 1386 01:22:14,167 --> 01:22:15,708 ♪ Long tall Sally... ♪ 1387 01:22:16,792 --> 01:22:19,042 ♪ Jump back in the alley, baby ♪ 1388 01:22:20,042 --> 01:22:22,125 ♪ Put your hand on your hip ♪ 1389 01:22:22,833 --> 01:22:24,167 ♪ Let your backbone slip ♪ 1390 01:22:26,083 --> 01:22:28,708 ♪ Oh, yeah... ♪ 1391 01:22:32,208 --> 01:22:34,207 ♪Yeah! ♪ 1392 01:22:36,750 --> 01:22:38,832 Where are you going to run? 1393 01:22:38,833 --> 01:22:40,416 Where are you going to fucking hide? 1394 01:22:40,417 --> 01:22:42,374 You useless little prick! 1395 01:22:42,375 --> 01:22:44,291 You're going to die alone, you cunt! 1396 01:22:44,292 --> 01:22:45,582 You're fucking replaceable! 1397 01:22:45,583 --> 01:22:47,624 You can't escape this! 1398 01:23:01,458 --> 01:23:02,916 Fan-bloody-tastic! 1399 01:23:02,917 --> 01:23:05,500 Listen to that. It's deafening. 1400 01:23:06,042 --> 01:23:07,499 Oh thank you. I'm the dad. 1401 01:23:07,500 --> 01:23:09,124 Taught him everything he knows. 1402 01:23:09,125 --> 01:23:10,792 Peter Conway. 1403 01:23:11,083 --> 01:23:12,999 You know what Chris, entrances and exits. 1404 01:23:13,000 --> 01:23:14,707 No one cares about that stuff anymore. 1405 01:23:14,708 --> 01:23:18,667 But tonight, you outshone Tom Jones, lad! 1406 01:23:18,958 --> 01:23:21,874 Oh, look at him. Just another day at the office. 1407 01:23:21,875 --> 01:23:24,667 Well, this is going to knock your socks off. 1408 01:23:25,042 --> 01:23:27,082 Rob! Rob! 1409 01:23:27,083 --> 01:23:31,583 Guess who's playing Knebworth next summer? 1410 01:23:33,375 --> 01:23:35,042 Knebworth! 1411 01:23:35,917 --> 01:23:37,499 Wait till I tell the lads! 1412 01:23:37,500 --> 01:23:39,332 Hey, have you thought about a support act? 1413 01:23:39,333 --> 01:23:41,249 Now, I could do you a couple of numbers. 1414 01:23:41,250 --> 01:23:42,458 Four at most. 1415 01:23:42,667 --> 01:23:43,707 It's incredible. 1416 01:23:43,708 --> 01:23:46,417 It also comes with a new record deal. 1417 01:23:46,750 --> 01:23:48,125 It's obscene! 1418 01:23:49,917 --> 01:23:53,292 Look at you! You're bullet-proof. 1419 01:23:53,667 --> 01:23:55,457 Oh, I need a drink. 1420 01:23:55,458 --> 01:23:58,582 Look at this! Just what the doctor ordered. 1421 01:23:58,583 --> 01:24:00,499 Okay, I'll leave you to celebrate. 1422 01:24:00,500 --> 01:24:02,374 Congratulations. 1423 01:24:02,375 --> 01:24:03,958 Thanks, Chris. 1424 01:24:08,625 --> 01:24:10,250 Knebworth... 1425 01:24:12,167 --> 01:24:13,375 How does it feel? 1426 01:24:15,333 --> 01:24:16,542 Crippling. 1427 01:24:17,708 --> 01:24:19,500 It'll sink in. 1428 01:24:21,000 --> 01:24:23,124 It's like someone's picked sides for an after-school game 1429 01:24:23,125 --> 01:24:25,208 and it's all gone horribly, horribly wrong. 1430 01:24:27,458 --> 01:24:29,332 It's one against thousands. 1431 01:24:29,333 --> 01:24:32,083 Bollocks! The audience loves ya. 1432 01:24:34,500 --> 01:24:35,708 I can't do it. 1433 01:24:37,542 --> 01:24:39,500 I can't carry Knebworth. 1434 01:24:40,125 --> 01:24:42,041 I'll be like a lamb to the fucking slaughter, Dad. 1435 01:24:42,042 --> 01:24:44,582 - It's just stage fright. - You're not listening! 1436 01:24:44,583 --> 01:24:47,125 It's normal. Okay? 1437 01:24:48,125 --> 01:24:50,333 You know what's always helped me? 1438 01:24:51,250 --> 01:24:53,250 A little bit of Dutch courage. 1439 01:24:53,875 --> 01:24:55,542 Don't I know it. 1440 01:24:58,917 --> 01:25:00,874 Dad, I'm sorry. Dad! 1441 01:25:00,875 --> 01:25:03,792 No one buys a ticket to hear your problems, son. 1442 01:25:05,000 --> 01:25:07,292 You wanna know why these people are gods? 1443 01:25:08,833 --> 01:25:11,708 Because they make other people's problems go away. 1444 01:25:13,208 --> 01:25:15,167 Dad, Dad, stay. Please! 1445 01:26:10,833 --> 01:26:12,417 Whoa! 1446 01:26:19,667 --> 01:26:21,291 He's been climbing the charts 1447 01:26:21,292 --> 01:26:22,457 - and conquering the world. - Here he is! 1448 01:26:22,458 --> 01:26:23,832 You ready? Here's daddy's best mate. 1449 01:26:23,833 --> 01:26:25,625 Ladies and gentlemen - Robbie Williams! 1450 01:26:30,167 --> 01:26:31,499 Well, it's been 1451 01:26:31,500 --> 01:26:34,666 a sudden change in fortune for you, has it not? 1452 01:26:34,667 --> 01:26:36,166 I mean, you're flying high. 1453 01:26:36,167 --> 01:26:37,582 Sober as a judge, Parky. 1454 01:26:39,125 --> 01:26:40,375 Sorry, I have to do this. 1455 01:26:42,667 --> 01:26:44,625 Look Nan, it's Parky! 1456 01:26:45,500 --> 01:26:50,041 Oh, Betty! It's Robert. 1457 01:26:50,042 --> 01:26:51,124 Let's talk if we may 1458 01:26:51,125 --> 01:26:52,624 about this success you've been having. 1459 01:26:52,625 --> 01:26:54,124 I mean, it's not the first time, is it? 1460 01:26:54,125 --> 01:26:55,917 You've had it before with Take That. 1461 01:26:56,333 --> 01:26:59,375 Would you say that this is a different kind of success? 1462 01:26:59,833 --> 01:27:01,541 It means a great deal more to me now. 1463 01:27:01,542 --> 01:27:02,749 I'm about to perform 1464 01:27:02,750 --> 01:27:05,916 in front of a record crowd at Knebworth in a few weeks. 1465 01:27:05,917 --> 01:27:09,458 No, no, stop it. It's nothing. 1466 01:27:09,667 --> 01:27:12,582 It's only the biggest music event in British history. 1467 01:27:14,083 --> 01:27:15,707 That's my boy. 1468 01:27:15,708 --> 01:27:18,291 But of course, Knebworth is not the only record 1469 01:27:18,292 --> 01:27:20,082 you've broken recently, is it? 1470 01:27:20,083 --> 01:27:23,291 There's the matter of your new deal with EMI - 1471 01:27:23,292 --> 01:27:25,082 eighty million pounds. 1472 01:27:25,083 --> 01:27:27,625 - How does that feel? - Ah, I don't know... 1473 01:27:28,792 --> 01:27:31,875 I'm rich beyond my wildest dreams! 1474 01:27:32,542 --> 01:27:33,957 I thought I was quoting that lady 1475 01:27:33,958 --> 01:27:35,707 who famously won the lottery. 1476 01:27:35,708 --> 01:27:38,332 But she said, "Spend, spend, spend." 1477 01:27:38,333 --> 01:27:40,042 So no one got it. 1478 01:27:40,333 --> 01:27:42,249 Mind you, I've said worse things in interviews... 1479 01:27:44,958 --> 01:27:46,916 How would you describe your time with Take That? 1480 01:27:46,917 --> 01:27:48,792 I was very fortunate to be in Take That... 1481 01:27:49,375 --> 01:27:51,624 ...and four out of the five Spice Girls. 1482 01:27:51,625 --> 01:27:53,833 Posh said no, didn't she? 1483 01:27:55,458 --> 01:27:57,624 Now, you've connected with many women in the past-- 1484 01:27:57,625 --> 01:28:00,249 Oh, we're going to talk about my sex life. 1485 01:28:00,250 --> 01:28:02,292 Well, I suppose... 1486 01:28:02,958 --> 01:28:04,791 There's nothing to write home about. 1487 01:28:04,792 --> 01:28:07,833 Which is a shame 'cause Mum loves getting those letters. 1488 01:28:08,375 --> 01:28:10,958 Oh, I mean, how many flat tyres can you have? 1489 01:28:11,625 --> 01:28:13,999 Well, the second one we didn't even get out of the car. 1490 01:28:14,000 --> 01:28:16,124 There was no way Natalie was going to ruin her hair, 1491 01:28:16,125 --> 01:28:18,124 so they just jacked it up with us all inside. 1492 01:28:19,250 --> 01:28:21,249 - And the weather was-- - I'm just popping to the loo. 1493 01:28:21,250 --> 01:28:23,042 The weather was horrendous. 1494 01:28:23,583 --> 01:28:25,416 At least the sound was good... 1495 01:28:25,417 --> 01:28:26,999 My voice was tired though. 1496 01:28:27,000 --> 01:28:28,791 Probably because I wasn't sleeping. 1497 01:28:28,792 --> 01:28:31,374 Which is weird because the bed was insanely comfortable. 1498 01:28:31,375 --> 01:28:34,042 I even got the name of the mattress in case we wanted... 1499 01:28:34,875 --> 01:28:36,792 But you're finally settling down? 1500 01:28:38,000 --> 01:28:39,291 I have to be a realist. 1501 01:28:39,292 --> 01:28:42,625 You know, we're both on tour a lot, 1502 01:28:43,167 --> 01:28:44,875 and it can be difficult, you know. 1503 01:29:07,667 --> 01:29:10,207 So tell me, what's it like for Robbie Williams 1504 01:29:10,208 --> 01:29:11,917 to be in love? 1505 01:29:14,042 --> 01:29:15,708 Well, that's difficult to... 1506 01:29:16,292 --> 01:29:17,750 ...um... 1507 01:29:19,833 --> 01:29:21,791 Flings are much easier. 1508 01:29:30,833 --> 01:29:33,333 You make me feel so small... 1509 01:29:34,083 --> 01:29:36,333 ...and I've hated you for it... 1510 01:29:36,792 --> 01:29:38,958 ...for making me feel so... 1511 01:29:40,792 --> 01:29:42,292 ...unnecessary. 1512 01:29:48,917 --> 01:29:51,792 The fucking awful things you do... 1513 01:29:54,417 --> 01:29:56,833 I thought you couldn't help it. 1514 01:30:02,375 --> 01:30:04,917 But you just don't want to. 1515 01:30:08,250 --> 01:30:10,875 And I can't help you anymore. 1516 01:30:29,042 --> 01:30:30,333 Rob? 1517 01:30:38,375 --> 01:30:39,750 Rob? 1518 01:30:42,208 --> 01:30:44,208 Rob, please say something. 1519 01:30:46,375 --> 01:30:47,958 Babe... 1520 01:30:56,458 --> 01:30:57,457 Nic, please! 1521 01:30:57,458 --> 01:30:59,125 You're a fucking animal! 1522 01:30:59,292 --> 01:31:01,207 Babe, you need to calm down. 1523 01:31:01,208 --> 01:31:02,667 Don't tell me what I need. 1524 01:31:05,125 --> 01:31:07,082 - Get out! - I can fix it! 1525 01:31:07,083 --> 01:31:08,458 You're too fucking late! 1526 01:31:09,000 --> 01:31:11,500 But I love you! 1527 01:31:27,292 --> 01:31:29,707 Easy! Easy now. Come on. 1528 01:31:29,708 --> 01:31:31,458 Briggsy... 1529 01:31:31,667 --> 01:31:33,542 Oh, what the fuck. 1530 01:31:33,750 --> 01:31:36,042 - He's alright. - Course I am! 1531 01:31:36,458 --> 01:31:37,749 Shit! 1532 01:31:37,750 --> 01:31:39,499 You should've said 'no' to this one. 1533 01:31:39,500 --> 01:31:40,624 To Top of the Pops? 1534 01:31:40,625 --> 01:31:42,374 You can't buy this kind of promotion. 1535 01:31:42,375 --> 01:31:43,999 What's to promote? Knebworth's sold out. 1536 01:31:44,000 --> 01:31:45,082 The world tour. 1537 01:31:46,167 --> 01:31:47,291 What, he just does Knebworth 1538 01:31:47,292 --> 01:31:48,457 and pops his feet up, does he? 1539 01:31:48,458 --> 01:31:49,707 You thought getting to the top was hard. 1540 01:31:49,708 --> 01:31:51,291 Try staying there. 1541 01:31:52,458 --> 01:31:54,583 - On in five. - Come on, you're up. 1542 01:31:57,667 --> 01:31:59,167 Leave it. 1543 01:32:02,875 --> 01:32:04,708 Oh, it's a woman! 1544 01:32:05,167 --> 01:32:06,999 Hi Mum, I'm about to go on Top-- 1545 01:32:07,000 --> 01:32:08,082 Where have you been? 1546 01:32:08,083 --> 01:32:09,207 I've been trying to reach you-- 1547 01:32:09,208 --> 01:32:10,291 I know, I know, but listen, 1548 01:32:10,292 --> 01:32:11,499 I'll have to talk to you later, ducky head, 1549 01:32:11,500 --> 01:32:14,166 because my pianist, well he's accidentally shat himself, 1550 01:32:14,167 --> 01:32:15,416 and it's just a horror show-- 1551 01:32:15,417 --> 01:32:17,125 It's your Nan. 1552 01:32:17,708 --> 01:32:19,874 She kept asking for ya. 1553 01:32:19,875 --> 01:32:22,333 I tried calling ya, but... 1554 01:32:23,917 --> 01:32:27,000 I'm so sorry, love... she's gone. 1555 01:32:31,292 --> 01:32:33,750 Come on, mate. Let's go. 1556 01:32:45,958 --> 01:32:48,707 Whoever pulls the sword out of the stone 1557 01:32:48,708 --> 01:32:51,542 gets to be the new King of England. 1558 01:32:52,208 --> 01:32:53,499 He's here tonight to sing 1559 01:32:53,500 --> 01:32:56,332 what has become the unofficial national anthem. 1560 01:32:56,333 --> 01:32:59,957 It's the song on everyone's lips and in everyone's hearts. 1561 01:32:59,958 --> 01:33:03,582 Ladies and gentlemen, the ego has landed. 1562 01:33:03,583 --> 01:33:05,874 So the next thing you know, 1563 01:33:05,875 --> 01:33:08,332 all the knights are straining... 1564 01:33:11,625 --> 01:33:16,458 ...and turning red, but nobody could budge it. 1565 01:33:17,250 --> 01:33:20,166 So you can imagine how everyone laughed 1566 01:33:20,167 --> 01:33:23,416 when little Arthur stepped up for his turn. 1567 01:33:23,417 --> 01:33:27,499 Everyone, except Merlin. 1568 01:33:27,500 --> 01:33:31,042 Merlin just stroked his beard and whispered, 1569 01:33:32,292 --> 01:33:37,541 "Arthur, I know those sexy, muscular knights couldn't do it 1570 01:33:37,542 --> 01:33:40,457 "and you're just a little fart of a child 1571 01:33:40,458 --> 01:33:42,291 "with puny little arms. 1572 01:33:42,292 --> 01:33:45,958 "But I believe in you." 1573 01:33:52,500 --> 01:33:55,292 ♪ I sit and wait ♪ 1574 01:34:06,042 --> 01:34:13,042 ♪ Does an angel contemplate my fate? ♪ 1575 01:34:15,667 --> 01:34:20,458 ♪ And do they know the places where we go ♪ 1576 01:34:21,292 --> 01:34:25,750 ♪ When we're grey and old? ♪ 1577 01:34:27,375 --> 01:34:30,875 ♪ 'Cause I have been told ♪ 1578 01:34:31,542 --> 01:34:38,542 ♪ That salvation lets their wings unfold ♪ 1579 01:34:40,958 --> 01:34:44,000 ♪ So when I'm lying in my bed ♪ 1580 01:34:45,000 --> 01:34:47,750 ♪ Thoughts running through my head ♪ 1581 01:34:48,333 --> 01:34:51,292 ♪ And I feel that love is dead ♪ 1582 01:34:52,250 --> 01:34:55,374 ♪ I'm loving angels instead ♪ 1583 01:34:56,708 --> 01:35:02,666 ♪ And through it all she offers me protection ♪ 1584 01:35:02,667 --> 01:35:09,082 ♪ A lot of love and affection Whether I'm right or wrong ♪ 1585 01:35:09,083 --> 01:35:15,499 ♪ And down the waterfall Wherever it may take me ♪ 1586 01:35:15,500 --> 01:35:18,916 ♪ I know that life won't break me ♪ 1587 01:35:18,917 --> 01:35:21,500 ♪ When I come to call ♪ 1588 01:35:22,458 --> 01:35:25,250 ♪ She won't forsake me ♪ 1589 01:35:27,458 --> 01:35:31,375 ♪ I'm loving angels instead ♪ 1590 01:36:19,458 --> 01:36:25,791 ♪ And through it all she offers me protection ♪ 1591 01:36:25,792 --> 01:36:32,457 ♪ A lot of love and affection Whether I'm right or wrong ♪ 1592 01:36:32,458 --> 01:36:38,749 ♪ And down the waterfall Wherever it may take me ♪ 1593 01:36:38,750 --> 01:36:41,582 ♪ I know that life won't break me ♪ 1594 01:36:41,583 --> 01:36:45,167 ♪ When I come to call ♪ 1595 01:36:45,708 --> 01:36:49,125 ♪ She won't forsake me ♪ 1596 01:36:50,792 --> 01:36:55,542 ♪ I'm loving angels instead ♪ 1597 01:38:14,167 --> 01:38:16,042 They were out of salt and vinegar. 1598 01:38:17,250 --> 01:38:18,792 I don't want 'em. 1599 01:38:19,500 --> 01:38:20,500 Okay... 1600 01:38:25,000 --> 01:38:26,333 Ay, we should get the boys together. 1601 01:38:27,042 --> 01:38:29,458 Hey? Have a little knees up before your concert tomorrow. 1602 01:38:29,792 --> 01:38:31,124 It'd do you good. 1603 01:38:31,125 --> 01:38:32,375 I can't face it. 1604 01:38:36,500 --> 01:38:37,833 Zip me up. 1605 01:38:39,375 --> 01:38:41,457 Fucking hell. What time's lift off? 1606 01:38:41,458 --> 01:38:43,500 - It helps hide the fat. - Oh yeah. 1607 01:38:46,833 --> 01:38:48,999 You've no idea what it takes to get up there. 1608 01:38:49,000 --> 01:38:51,457 I can't sleep. 1609 01:38:51,458 --> 01:38:52,666 My back's fucked. 1610 01:38:52,667 --> 01:38:55,207 Yeah, but once you're up there you're smashing it, so... 1611 01:38:55,208 --> 01:38:58,167 See, that fucks me right off when people say that. 1612 01:39:02,667 --> 01:39:04,625 Being up there's the worst bit. 1613 01:39:06,208 --> 01:39:08,042 Pays alright, though. 1614 01:39:09,167 --> 01:39:10,792 Fuck... 1615 01:39:13,750 --> 01:39:15,833 You don't understand. 1616 01:39:20,375 --> 01:39:22,750 No, no, I don't understand. 1617 01:39:24,958 --> 01:39:26,250 But at least I'm trying. 1618 01:39:27,417 --> 01:39:28,666 You know all I wanted, 1619 01:39:28,667 --> 01:39:32,000 was for you to ask me, just once, how I'm doing... 1620 01:39:33,333 --> 01:39:35,749 You know, with work, and my little girl. 1621 01:39:35,750 --> 01:39:41,917 I'm about to walk out to 125,000 people! 1622 01:39:42,292 --> 01:39:45,291 You've got no fucking idea what that feels like. 1623 01:39:45,292 --> 01:39:47,666 Yeah and you've no idea that I earn in a month 1624 01:39:47,667 --> 01:39:50,082 what you fucking snort in a minute... 1625 01:39:50,083 --> 01:39:53,082 Or that Kayleigh's shacked up with some fucking butcher, 1626 01:39:53,083 --> 01:39:54,416 and so I'm living in an estate 1627 01:39:54,417 --> 01:39:55,916 surrounded by fucking psychopaths! 1628 01:39:55,917 --> 01:39:57,582 Or that I only get to see my kid 1629 01:39:57,583 --> 01:39:59,541 for two hours every fortnight or-- 1630 01:39:59,542 --> 01:40:00,624 So you need money? 1631 01:40:00,625 --> 01:40:01,749 Fucking hell! 1632 01:40:01,750 --> 01:40:03,249 You know, jealousy don't suit you, Nate. 1633 01:40:03,250 --> 01:40:05,583 Jealousy? Are you fucking kidding? 1634 01:40:06,167 --> 01:40:08,332 Alright, yeah, I might have close to fuck all, 1635 01:40:08,333 --> 01:40:11,458 but you, you have fucking nothing! 1636 01:40:12,083 --> 01:40:14,291 And this coming from you - 1637 01:40:14,292 --> 01:40:17,708 a nothing, nobody cunt! 1638 01:40:19,125 --> 01:40:21,124 You know the difference between me and you, Nate? 1639 01:40:21,125 --> 01:40:23,749 It's not my money, it's not your kid. 1640 01:40:23,750 --> 01:40:26,374 It's the fact that I had the fucking balls 1641 01:40:26,375 --> 01:40:29,208 to make something of myself. 1642 01:40:39,875 --> 01:40:41,375 Yeah... 1643 01:40:41,708 --> 01:40:43,375 You bought a ticket to the dream, 1644 01:40:44,208 --> 01:40:46,583 and the dream came true, and... 1645 01:40:47,583 --> 01:40:50,083 Yeah, fuck it, I am, I'm jealous of that. 1646 01:40:51,000 --> 01:40:53,042 But you can keep the fucking rest. 1647 01:41:11,375 --> 01:41:13,416 Nate! Nate! 1648 01:41:13,417 --> 01:41:15,792 Nate! 1649 01:41:16,333 --> 01:41:18,583 Fuck! 1650 01:41:25,458 --> 01:41:30,208 ♪ Somewhere beyond the sea ♪ 1651 01:41:30,500 --> 01:41:34,542 ♪ Somewhere waiting for me ♪ 1652 01:41:35,500 --> 01:41:40,582 ♪ My lover stands on golden sands ♪ 1653 01:41:40,583 --> 01:41:47,125 ♪ And watches the ships that go sailing ♪ 1654 01:41:49,667 --> 01:41:51,917 And the crowd goes mild! 1655 01:41:55,000 --> 01:41:57,042 Time to get ready, youth. 1656 01:41:57,792 --> 01:41:59,958 We're going by helicopter and all... 1657 01:42:02,750 --> 01:42:04,208 Youth! 1658 01:42:06,583 --> 01:42:09,000 Oh, Jesus Christ! 1659 01:42:27,125 --> 01:42:28,333 Youth! 1660 01:42:34,500 --> 01:42:38,500 You bastard! I thought you'd passed out. 1661 01:42:38,958 --> 01:42:43,249 I have waited my whole life for you to step up, 1662 01:42:43,250 --> 01:42:47,707 and all it took was booking the biggest concert 1663 01:42:47,708 --> 01:42:49,416 in British history. 1664 01:42:49,417 --> 01:42:51,292 What're you going on about? 1665 01:42:51,792 --> 01:42:53,082 When you left us-- 1666 01:42:53,083 --> 01:42:54,999 Where's all this coming from? 1667 01:42:55,000 --> 01:43:00,208 All those years I thought, he's just sorting himself out. 1668 01:43:01,250 --> 01:43:06,042 He'll miss me so much and he'll come back. 1669 01:43:06,875 --> 01:43:08,333 Yeah, and I did. 1670 01:43:08,875 --> 01:43:10,042 Yeah... 1671 01:43:11,875 --> 01:43:13,458 'Cause Nan made you. 1672 01:43:17,542 --> 01:43:19,875 I didn't leave you with nothing, though, did I? 1673 01:43:20,458 --> 01:43:22,166 Where do you think your talent comes from? 1674 01:43:22,167 --> 01:43:23,749 Jesus Christ. 1675 01:43:23,750 --> 01:43:25,499 You've forgotten how fucking lucky you are, 1676 01:43:25,500 --> 01:43:27,042 that's your problem. 1677 01:43:27,458 --> 01:43:29,208 It's a privilege to do what we do. 1678 01:43:31,625 --> 01:43:32,958 What we do? 1679 01:43:33,583 --> 01:43:35,291 You live in a caravan. 1680 01:43:35,292 --> 01:43:38,207 You perform to fifteen fucking people a night. 1681 01:43:38,208 --> 01:43:41,124 And I love every second of it. 1682 01:43:41,125 --> 01:43:43,666 And I don't need pills to get me through. 1683 01:43:43,667 --> 01:43:45,124 Fucking hell... 1684 01:43:45,125 --> 01:43:46,874 Sure, I'd give anything to play to a big crowd. 1685 01:43:46,875 --> 01:43:48,208 Of course I would! 1686 01:43:48,708 --> 01:43:50,832 But if I only ever played to one person 1687 01:43:50,833 --> 01:43:51,916 for the rest of my life, 1688 01:43:51,917 --> 01:43:54,958 I'd be happy giving them everything I've got. 1689 01:43:56,792 --> 01:43:59,374 Unless that person was me though, right? 1690 01:43:59,375 --> 01:44:02,625 Really? Who's been cheering you on from the wings, hey? 1691 01:44:04,250 --> 01:44:07,792 Who was it who stopped ya from ruining your career? 1692 01:44:08,292 --> 01:44:09,791 There wouldn't be a Robbie Williams 1693 01:44:09,792 --> 01:44:11,667 if it wasn't for me. 1694 01:44:14,500 --> 01:44:17,542 You've always been there for Robbie Williams, Dad. 1695 01:44:21,458 --> 01:44:24,042 Why couldn't you just be there for Robert? 1696 01:44:34,542 --> 01:44:37,167 You off to watch the football then, yeah? 1697 01:44:39,042 --> 01:44:40,542 Nice one. 1698 01:44:42,333 --> 01:44:44,458 I'll see you in six years! 1699 01:44:47,208 --> 01:44:48,792 You don't have it. 1700 01:44:51,167 --> 01:44:53,833 That's why you never made it! 1701 01:44:55,625 --> 01:45:01,083 Not as a husband, not as a father, not as anything! 1702 01:45:05,083 --> 01:45:08,417 Peter Conway doesn't fucking have it! 1703 01:45:30,125 --> 01:45:33,083 Everything has come down to this. 1704 01:45:35,167 --> 01:45:37,042 They've come for me. 1705 01:45:38,625 --> 01:45:41,000 And I'm going to die out there. 1706 01:45:43,583 --> 01:45:45,583 This is the end. 1707 01:46:29,375 --> 01:46:31,333 Light 'em up. 1708 01:46:45,917 --> 01:46:47,207 Robbie! 1709 01:46:47,208 --> 01:46:48,791 ♪ Hell is gone and heaven's here ♪ 1710 01:46:48,792 --> 01:46:50,707 ♪ There's nothing left for you to fear ♪ 1711 01:46:50,708 --> 01:46:53,707 ♪ Shake your ass, come over here, now scream ♪ 1712 01:46:55,000 --> 01:46:58,541 ♪ I'm a burning effigy of everything I used to be ♪ 1713 01:46:58,542 --> 01:47:01,666 ♪ You're my rock of empathy, my dear ♪ 1714 01:47:01,667 --> 01:47:07,750 ♪ So come on let me entertain you ♪ 1715 01:47:10,167 --> 01:47:15,333 ♪ Let me entertain you ♪ 1716 01:47:18,042 --> 01:47:19,707 ♪ Life's too short for you to die ♪ 1717 01:47:19,708 --> 01:47:21,832 ♪ So grab yourself an alibi ♪ 1718 01:47:21,833 --> 01:47:24,708 ♪ Heaven knows your mother lied, mon cher ♪ 1719 01:47:25,500 --> 01:47:27,332 ♪Separate your right from wrongs ♪ 1720 01:47:27,333 --> 01:47:29,457 ♪ Come and sing a different song ♪ 1721 01:47:29,458 --> 01:47:32,416 ♪ The kettle's on, so don't be long, mon cher ♪ 1722 01:47:32,417 --> 01:47:38,750 ♪ So come on let me entertain you ♪ 1723 01:47:41,167 --> 01:47:46,125 ♪ Let me entertain you ♪ 1724 01:47:49,500 --> 01:47:51,292 Good evening, Knebworth. 1725 01:47:53,708 --> 01:47:55,833 My name is Robbie Williams, 1726 01:47:57,417 --> 01:47:59,041 this is my band, 1727 01:47:59,042 --> 01:48:03,208 and for the next two hours your arse is mine! 1728 01:48:04,375 --> 01:48:06,124 ♪ Look me up in the yellow pages ♪ 1729 01:48:06,125 --> 01:48:08,166 ♪ I will be your rock of ages ♪ 1730 01:48:08,167 --> 01:48:10,083 ♪ See-through fads and your crazy phases ♪ 1731 01:48:11,917 --> 01:48:13,707 ♪ Little Bo Peep has lost his sheep ♪ 1732 01:48:13,708 --> 01:48:15,832 ♪ Popped a pill and fell asleep... ♪ 1733 01:48:15,833 --> 01:48:17,499 We're going to slaughter you. 1734 01:48:17,500 --> 01:48:19,624 You're fucking useless! 1735 01:48:19,625 --> 01:48:23,124 ♪ Your mind gets burned with the habits you've learned ♪ 1736 01:48:23,125 --> 01:48:26,916 ♪ But we're the generation that's got to be heard ♪ 1737 01:48:26,917 --> 01:48:28,874 ♪ You're tired of your teachers... ♪ 1738 01:48:28,875 --> 01:48:31,207 You've got nowhere to go! 1739 01:48:31,208 --> 01:48:34,750 Do everyone a favour, and fucking end it! 1740 01:48:35,125 --> 01:48:38,125 Bounce! Bounce! Bounce! 1741 01:48:42,583 --> 01:48:47,292 ♪ Let me entertain you ♪ 1742 01:48:50,083 --> 01:48:52,749 There's only one way out! 1743 01:48:52,750 --> 01:48:55,249 You don't deserve to fucking live. 1744 01:48:55,250 --> 01:48:56,707 You will never be enough! 1745 01:48:58,292 --> 01:49:01,499 ♪ He may be good He may be out of sight ♪ 1746 01:49:01,500 --> 01:49:05,291 ♪ But he can't be here So come around tonight ♪ 1747 01:49:05,292 --> 01:49:08,957 ♪ Here is the place where the feeling grows ♪ 1748 01:49:08,958 --> 01:49:11,707 ♪ You gotta get high before you... ♪ 1749 01:49:21,042 --> 01:49:26,083 ♪ Let me entertain you ♪ 1750 01:49:28,833 --> 01:49:34,208 ♪ Let me entertain you ♪ 1751 01:49:36,583 --> 01:49:43,125 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1752 01:49:44,292 --> 01:49:45,958 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1753 01:49:46,125 --> 01:49:50,542 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1754 01:49:55,458 --> 01:49:56,750 No, no, noooo! 1755 01:50:12,542 --> 01:50:15,458 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1756 01:50:17,000 --> 01:50:19,250 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1757 01:50:19,458 --> 01:50:21,375 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1758 01:50:21,542 --> 01:50:23,958 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1759 01:50:24,917 --> 01:50:26,458 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1760 01:50:26,667 --> 01:50:28,750 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1761 01:50:28,917 --> 01:50:31,750 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1762 01:50:32,333 --> 01:50:34,542 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1763 01:50:34,708 --> 01:50:36,666 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1764 01:50:36,667 --> 01:50:40,083 ♪ Come on, come on, come on, come on ♪ 1765 01:51:11,333 --> 01:51:14,667 ♪ Send someone to love me ♪ 1766 01:51:18,292 --> 01:51:21,792 ♪ I need to rest in arms ♪ 1767 01:51:27,833 --> 01:51:31,000 ♪ Keep me safe from harm ♪ 1768 01:51:34,458 --> 01:51:36,583 ♪ In pouring rain ♪ 1769 01:51:49,750 --> 01:51:52,042 ♪ As my soul ♪ 1770 01:51:55,083 --> 01:51:58,208 ♪ Heals the shame ♪ 1771 01:52:01,542 --> 01:52:08,042 ♪ I will grow through this pain ♪ 1772 01:52:12,292 --> 01:52:17,833 ♪ Lord, I'm doing all I can... ♪ 1773 01:52:59,958 --> 01:53:03,125 ♪ Send someone to love me ♪ 1774 01:53:03,958 --> 01:53:07,125 ♪ I need to rest in arms ♪ 1775 01:53:08,125 --> 01:53:10,833 ♪ Keep me safe from harm ♪ 1776 01:53:11,667 --> 01:53:14,875 ♪ In pouring rain ♪ 1777 01:53:15,833 --> 01:53:18,833 ♪ Give me endless summer ♪ 1778 01:53:19,917 --> 01:53:22,583 ♪ Lord, I fear the cold ♪ 1779 01:53:24,375 --> 01:53:30,375 ♪ Feel I'm getting old Before my time 1780 01:53:32,333 --> 01:53:39,250 ♪ As my soul heals the shame ♪ 1781 01:53:40,583 --> 01:53:46,625 ♪ I will grow through this pain ♪ 1782 01:53:48,000 --> 01:53:54,416 ♪ Lord, I'm doing all I can... ♪ 1783 01:53:54,417 --> 01:53:55,750 I lost the house. 1784 01:53:57,167 --> 01:54:00,000 The worst thing was I lost the ability to care. 1785 01:54:03,708 --> 01:54:05,958 You're next, if you want to share. 1786 01:54:11,042 --> 01:54:13,333 I feel a bit stupid to be honest. 1787 01:54:17,250 --> 01:54:20,083 I'm just a chav that got everything they ever wanted. 1788 01:54:22,917 --> 01:54:25,208 It's a bit fucking embarrassing to be frank. 1789 01:54:28,750 --> 01:54:31,458 I was taught that fame would solve everything. 1790 01:54:34,167 --> 01:54:36,500 But fame's got fuck all to do with me. 1791 01:54:37,208 --> 01:54:39,792 It's about acting out everyone else's fantasies. 1792 01:54:40,500 --> 01:54:44,541 The shagging, the boozing, the showing your bollocks on TV 1793 01:54:44,542 --> 01:54:46,208 and people cheering you for it. 1794 01:54:47,333 --> 01:54:49,250 Fame looks good in a photo. 1795 01:54:53,083 --> 01:54:56,708 They say your life freezes at the age you become famous. 1796 01:54:58,458 --> 01:55:00,375 So I am fifteen. 1797 01:55:02,625 --> 01:55:04,250 I'm stunted. 1798 01:55:06,042 --> 01:55:07,875 I'm unevolved. 1799 01:55:10,333 --> 01:55:12,957 And that's why I'm always like, "Oh it's okay, 1800 01:55:12,958 --> 01:55:15,083 "I think I'm a cunt. I'm fine with it." 1801 01:55:15,458 --> 01:55:17,750 So I get in there before you do. 1802 01:55:20,375 --> 01:55:23,417 And I fucking hate myself for it. 1803 01:55:28,833 --> 01:55:32,625 Sometimes it's a curse to get everything we want. 1804 01:55:33,000 --> 01:55:35,207 Repairing close relationships 1805 01:55:35,208 --> 01:55:39,042 is a good first step to repairing ourselves. 1806 01:55:52,167 --> 01:55:55,708 ♪ Go easy on my conscience ♪ 1807 01:55:56,458 --> 01:55:59,333 ♪ 'Cause it's not my fault ♪ 1808 01:56:00,542 --> 01:56:06,708 ♪ I know I've been taught To take the blame ♪ 1809 01:56:23,750 --> 01:56:30,292 ♪ As my soul heals the shame ♪ 1810 01:56:31,958 --> 01:56:37,667 ♪ I will grow through this pain ♪ 1811 01:56:39,458 --> 01:56:45,708 ♪ Lord, I'm doing all I can... ♪ 1812 01:57:30,792 --> 01:57:36,792 ♪ Give me endless summer Lord, I fear the cold ♪ 1813 01:57:49,542 --> 01:57:54,875 ♪ I will grow through this pain ♪ 1814 01:57:55,583 --> 01:57:59,917 ♪ Lord, I'm doing all I can... ♪ 1815 01:58:13,750 --> 01:58:20,750 ♪ Lord, I'm doing all I can to be a better man ♪ 1816 01:58:25,750 --> 01:58:28,000 ♪ To be a better man ♪ 1817 01:58:31,792 --> 01:58:36,625 ♪ To be a better man ♪ 1818 01:58:47,292 --> 01:58:50,666 Good evening, folks. Good evening, you slags. 1819 01:58:50,667 --> 01:58:52,416 No, good evening, folks. 1820 01:58:52,417 --> 01:58:55,416 So, who is Robbie Williams? 1821 01:58:55,417 --> 01:58:57,332 Well, I've been called many things - 1822 01:58:57,333 --> 01:59:00,457 narcissistic, punchable, shit-eating twat. 1823 01:59:00,458 --> 01:59:02,416 But while I'm all those things, 1824 01:59:02,417 --> 01:59:05,207 I want to show you how I really see myself. 1825 01:59:05,208 --> 01:59:07,666 So sit back, relax, 1826 01:59:07,667 --> 01:59:11,375 while I give you a right fucking entertaining. 1827 01:59:14,458 --> 01:59:18,875 So, the story starts... 1828 01:59:53,500 --> 01:59:56,666 This is the last song of the evening. 1829 01:59:58,708 --> 02:00:00,166 It's sadder than that. 1830 02:00:02,000 --> 02:00:03,957 It's much sadder than that. 1831 02:00:05,250 --> 02:00:07,624 Thank you for being a wonderful audience tonight 1832 02:00:07,625 --> 02:00:09,832 and making my dream come true. 1833 02:00:14,417 --> 02:00:16,667 I want to thank my mum - 1834 02:00:17,625 --> 02:00:20,250 for being there when I needed ya - 1835 02:00:21,000 --> 02:00:22,708 always. 1836 02:00:22,917 --> 02:00:24,542 I love you. 1837 02:00:37,167 --> 02:00:38,458 You guessed it, folks! 1838 02:00:40,792 --> 02:00:44,791 ♪ And now, the end is near ♪ 1839 02:00:44,792 --> 02:00:45,999 If you know the words, sing up. 1840 02:00:46,000 --> 02:00:47,416 If you don't, shut up, it'll sound crap. 1841 02:00:49,542 --> 02:00:52,333 ♪ ...the final curtain ♪ 1842 02:00:53,500 --> 02:00:58,749 ♪ My friends I'll say it clear ♪ 1843 02:00:58,750 --> 02:01:04,582 ♪ And state my case On which I'm certain ♪ 1844 02:01:04,583 --> 02:01:06,249 Love you, Robbie. 1845 02:01:06,250 --> 02:01:10,750 ♪ I've lived a life that's full ♪ 1846 02:01:11,792 --> 02:01:17,041 ♪ I've travelled each and every highway ♪ 1847 02:01:17,042 --> 02:01:18,457 Come on... 1848 02:01:18,458 --> 02:01:21,166 ♪ And more... ♪ Everybody! 1849 02:01:21,167 --> 02:01:23,541 ♪ Much more than this ♪ 1850 02:01:23,542 --> 02:01:29,667 ♪ I did it my way ♪ 1851 02:01:31,250 --> 02:01:32,957 Now, I couldn't finish the show 1852 02:01:32,958 --> 02:01:35,792 without mentioning someone else here tonight. 1853 02:01:36,542 --> 02:01:39,166 I share a lot of the same mannerisms as this person. 1854 02:01:39,167 --> 02:01:41,583 People say I sing a bit like him too. 1855 02:01:43,125 --> 02:01:44,374 He's made me who I am - 1856 02:01:44,375 --> 02:01:48,125 all the good things and a touch of the bad. 1857 02:01:48,917 --> 02:01:51,167 And I wouldn't be where I am without him. 1858 02:01:51,833 --> 02:01:53,750 We haven't performed together for... 1859 02:01:54,750 --> 02:01:56,542 ...twenty five years. 1860 02:01:58,583 --> 02:02:01,417 But I've wanted to every day since. 1861 02:02:02,250 --> 02:02:04,667 Please welcome to the stage... 1862 02:02:05,500 --> 02:02:07,207 ...my dad. 1863 02:02:27,042 --> 02:02:28,208 Thank you very much. 1864 02:02:29,000 --> 02:02:31,792 What do you think, youth, shall we light 'em up? 1865 02:02:33,375 --> 02:02:35,167 Tell it like it is, Dad. 1866 02:02:38,042 --> 02:02:42,916 ♪ Regrets, I've had a few ♪ 1867 02:02:42,917 --> 02:02:44,082 Me too. 1868 02:02:44,083 --> 02:02:49,208 ♪ But then again Too few to mention ♪ 1869 02:02:50,917 --> 02:02:55,708 ♪ I did what I had to do ♪ 1870 02:02:56,583 --> 02:03:02,875 ♪ And saw it through without exemption ♪ 1871 02:03:03,833 --> 02:03:08,542 ♪ I planned each charted course ♪ 1872 02:03:09,333 --> 02:03:15,042 ♪ Each careful step along the byway ♪ 1873 02:03:17,208 --> 02:03:19,624 - I'm sorry, Robert. - I know, Dad. 1874 02:03:19,625 --> 02:03:21,500 You always had it, you know. 1875 02:03:22,042 --> 02:03:26,375 Now, look at you. You're one of the gods. 1876 02:03:27,958 --> 02:03:33,875 ♪ Yes, there were times I'm sure you knew ♪ 1877 02:03:35,250 --> 02:03:39,792 ♪ When I bit off more than I could chew ♪ 1878 02:03:41,167 --> 02:03:46,542 ♪ And through it all When there was doubt ♪ 1879 02:03:47,375 --> 02:03:53,333 ♪ I ate it up and spit it out ♪ 1880 02:03:53,833 --> 02:03:59,332 ♪ I faced it all and I stood tall ♪ 1881 02:03:59,333 --> 02:04:05,541 ♪ And did it my way ♪ 1882 02:04:23,500 --> 02:04:25,792 Peter Conway, everybody. 1883 02:04:26,667 --> 02:04:28,292 My dad! 1884 02:04:28,958 --> 02:04:30,833 Or at least that's what Mum told us. 1885 02:04:31,167 --> 02:04:32,250 Robbie... 1886 02:04:32,500 --> 02:04:37,167 ♪ I've loved I've laughed and cried ♪ 1887 02:04:38,083 --> 02:04:44,042 ♪ I've had my fill My share of losing ♪ 1888 02:04:45,042 --> 02:04:51,208 ♪ And now As tears subside ♪ 1889 02:04:51,708 --> 02:04:56,500 ♪ I find it all so amusing ♪ 1890 02:04:57,542 --> 02:05:02,667 ♪ To think I did all that ♪ 1891 02:05:03,292 --> 02:05:09,375 ♪ And may I say Not in a shy way ♪ 1892 02:05:10,750 --> 02:05:14,917 ♪ Oh no Oh no not me ♪ 1893 02:05:15,542 --> 02:05:21,124 ♪ I did it my way ♪ 1894 02:05:21,125 --> 02:05:27,500 ♪ For what is a man What has he got? ♪ 1895 02:05:28,333 --> 02:05:33,958 ♪ If not himself then he has naught ♪ 1896 02:05:35,125 --> 02:05:40,791 ♪ To say the things he truly feels ♪ 1897 02:05:40,792 --> 02:05:47,666 ♪ And not the words of one who kneels ♪ 1898 02:05:47,667 --> 02:05:54,417 ♪ Let the record show I took the blows ♪ 1899 02:05:55,375 --> 02:06:02,375 ♪ And did it my way ♪ 1900 02:06:16,208 --> 02:06:17,333 We love you! 1901 02:06:21,958 --> 02:06:27,667 Nan! This is your grandson singing and I love you. 1902 02:06:30,833 --> 02:06:37,833 ♪ I did it my way ♪ 1903 02:06:47,500 --> 02:06:50,167 Who did I love when I was a kid? 1904 02:06:50,750 --> 02:06:53,583 I loved Frank Sinatra. 1905 02:06:54,625 --> 02:06:57,792 And I loved my dad and he's an entertainer. 1906 02:06:58,750 --> 02:07:02,125 Shit! That's who I am. That feels good to me. 1907 02:07:02,750 --> 02:07:06,124 I want to make the twelve-year-old at my Nan's, 1908 02:07:06,125 --> 02:07:09,499 watching TV on a Saturday night, feeling safe... 1909 02:07:09,500 --> 02:07:11,749 I wanted to make that same twelve-year-old 1910 02:07:11,750 --> 02:07:14,083 feel safe onstage. 1911 02:07:16,125 --> 02:07:17,666 I'm a fucking entertainer. 1912 02:07:17,667 --> 02:07:20,957 It might be cabaret, but it's world-class cabaret, 1913 02:07:20,958 --> 02:07:23,208 and I'm the fucking best at it. 1914 02:07:25,917 --> 02:07:28,083 Fuck yourselves! 1915 02:07:44,083 --> 02:07:47,417 ♪ I walked along a forbidden road ♪ 1916 02:07:48,125 --> 02:07:52,208 ♪ I had to know Where does it go? ♪ 1917 02:07:54,125 --> 02:07:57,583 ♪ Like birds that fly into the sun ♪ 1918 02:07:57,958 --> 02:08:02,583 ♪ I had to run I'm not the only one ♪ 1919 02:08:04,250 --> 02:08:07,291 ♪ Why do you look at me that way? ♪ 1920 02:08:07,292 --> 02:08:10,166 ♪ I'm not a problem that needs solving ♪ 1921 02:08:10,167 --> 02:08:12,875 ♪ The truth is still evolving ♪ 1922 02:08:14,375 --> 02:08:17,499 ♪ Life is the choices that we make ♪ 1923 02:08:17,500 --> 02:08:20,249 ♪ We're the masters of our own fate ♪ 1924 02:08:20,250 --> 02:08:22,833 ♪ The painter and the paint ♪ 1925 02:08:24,208 --> 02:08:28,749 ♪ You need to lose your mind ♪ 1926 02:08:28,750 --> 02:08:35,833 ♪ To get back to the light Sometimes ♪ 1927 02:08:37,500 --> 02:08:40,667 ♪ I walked along a forbidden road ♪ 1928 02:08:41,250 --> 02:08:45,958 ♪ I had to know Where does it go? ♪ 1929 02:08:47,458 --> 02:08:51,332 ♪ Like birds that fly into the sun ♪ 1930 02:08:51,333 --> 02:08:56,125 ♪ I had to run I'm not the only one ♪ 1931 02:08:57,625 --> 02:09:00,707 ♪ Maybe I'm never satisfied ♪ 1932 02:09:00,708 --> 02:09:03,499 ♪ I made a lot of poor decisions ♪ 1933 02:09:03,500 --> 02:09:06,583 ♪ Yeah, I made some revisions ♪ 1934 02:09:07,875 --> 02:09:10,999 ♪ And I'm still trying to get it right ♪ 1935 02:09:11,000 --> 02:09:16,542 ♪ I'm a living contradiction The cure and the affliction ♪ 1936 02:09:17,333 --> 02:09:22,207 ♪ You need to lose your mind ♪ 1937 02:09:22,208 --> 02:09:29,292 ♪ To get back to the light Sometimes ♪ 1938 02:09:30,625 --> 02:09:34,125 ♪ I walked along a forbidden road ♪ 1939 02:09:34,375 --> 02:09:38,833 ♪ I had to know Where does it go? ♪ 1940 02:09:40,625 --> 02:09:44,125 ♪ Like birds that fly into the sun ♪ 1941 02:09:44,583 --> 02:09:49,042 ♪ I had to run I'm not the only one ♪ 1942 02:09:49,417 --> 02:09:54,208 ♪ So do you love me now? ♪ 1943 02:09:54,667 --> 02:09:59,083 ♪ Or did I let you down? ♪ 1944 02:09:59,625 --> 02:10:02,541 ♪ You said you wanted all my secrets ♪ 1945 02:10:02,542 --> 02:10:04,957 ♪ So I showed you all my demons ♪ 1946 02:10:04,958 --> 02:10:09,417 ♪ Do you love me now? ♪ 1947 02:10:10,917 --> 02:10:14,250 ♪ I walked along a forbidden road ♪ 1948 02:10:14,792 --> 02:10:19,375 ♪ I had to know Where does it go? ♪ 1949 02:10:20,917 --> 02:10:24,333 ♪ Like birds that fly into the sun ♪ 1950 02:10:24,917 --> 02:10:30,333 ♪ I had to run I'm not the only one ♪ 189604