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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,040 --> 00:00:03,990 You're late! 2 00:00:04,670 --> 00:00:07,710 I know, I'm sorry. It was a lot of traffic. 3 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:10,990 Liam Liu. 4 00:00:11,540 --> 00:00:12,540 Profile. 5 00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:17,870 So, you know Kung Fu? 6 00:00:20,250 --> 00:00:21,660 What color belt are you? 7 00:00:24,870 --> 00:00:26,450 I, I don't have a belt... 8 00:00:26,850 --> 00:00:29,010 Oh, you know what I love? I love suspenders. 9 00:00:29,540 --> 00:00:30,740 You don't know Martial Arts? 10 00:00:31,540 --> 00:00:32,200 No. 11 00:00:32,410 --> 00:00:34,450 It says on your resume that you know Martial Arts. 12 00:00:35,350 --> 00:00:38,470 Is there Martial Art in this commercial? I thought it was for toothpaste. 13 00:00:38,700 --> 00:00:39,570 Where are you from? 14 00:00:40,000 --> 00:00:41,080 New York City. 15 00:00:41,660 --> 00:00:42,870 Uh, Queens, actually. 16 00:00:43,040 --> 00:00:44,370 But I went to Dalton, so... 17 00:00:44,950 --> 00:00:48,110 I retain the same elitist arrogance. - And what's your ethnicity? 18 00:00:48,830 --> 00:00:49,790 Oh, I'm Chinese. 19 00:00:50,370 --> 00:00:51,120 Speak Chinese? 20 00:00:52,500 --> 00:00:53,540 Not fluently. 21 00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:55,990 It says here speaks Chinese fluently. 22 00:00:57,910 --> 00:01:01,950 I'm sorry, is there Chinese in this commercial? I thought it was like... 23 00:01:02,450 --> 00:01:04,620 OK, thank you very much for coming, Liam. 24 00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:08,290 What? That's it? 25 00:01:08,660 --> 00:01:10,450 I didn't even get to read yet. 26 00:01:10,750 --> 00:01:12,870 Well, we are looking for Japanese, actually. 27 00:01:49,790 --> 00:01:50,990 Don't be sad. 28 00:01:51,910 --> 00:01:52,790 What? 29 00:01:53,290 --> 00:01:54,790 You look sad, don't be. 30 00:01:57,370 --> 00:01:58,540 It's my car. 31 00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:02,290 You know I just got towed because of a few parking tickets, 32 00:02:02,450 --> 00:02:09,040 which is why I guess I'm utilizing LA's fabulous public transportation system. 33 00:02:51,500 --> 00:02:53,290 Hey, that's... 34 00:02:53,970 --> 00:02:57,720 'Rays of sunny love' is great, but I still don't have my car. 35 00:02:58,080 --> 00:02:59,540 Well, think of it on the bright side. 36 00:03:00,660 --> 00:03:01,830 What's that? 37 00:03:03,320 --> 00:03:05,940 You never would have gotten to meet me, silly goose. 38 00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:10,240 Do you wanna get a cup of coffee with me? 39 00:03:10,620 --> 00:03:12,790 You see if I go home now, that I'm going home alone. 40 00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:14,870 And it's a little scary. 41 00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:18,370 How old are you? 42 00:03:18,620 --> 00:03:22,370 Why? Is it illegal to share a caffeinated beverage with a minor? 43 00:03:23,000 --> 00:03:25,290 I really shouldn't. 44 00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:28,700 I mean, it just wouldn't be logical. 45 00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:32,330 What if I'm the one? 46 00:03:33,410 --> 00:03:34,700 The one? 47 00:03:36,120 --> 00:03:39,160 If I am then you'll feel pretty stupid not having a cup of coffee with me. 48 00:03:40,410 --> 00:03:41,370 I guess so. 49 00:03:41,700 --> 00:03:45,620 I mean I'm not saying I am the one. There's just always the possibility, you know. 50 00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:48,370 And isn't that what life's about, possibilities? 51 00:03:50,160 --> 00:03:51,490 I really shouldn't. 52 00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:53,450 You can do anything you want to. 53 00:03:53,700 --> 00:03:55,200 It's the beauty of living. 54 00:04:13,700 --> 00:04:15,910 Every time I go out for something, Joe. 55 00:04:16,080 --> 00:04:20,660 It's always for some Kung Fu, Deli Store, Computer, Chinese... 56 00:04:20,830 --> 00:04:21,990 You are a little Chinese guy. 57 00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:25,240 You are gonna go out for roles for little Chinese guys. 58 00:04:25,410 --> 00:04:26,910 I was born in New York. 59 00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:29,790 How about a role for somebody born in New York? 60 00:04:29,950 --> 00:04:31,290 Nobody asked you to quit college... 61 00:04:31,450 --> 00:04:35,120 ...and try your hand on the lucrative world of motion picture and telematics. 62 00:04:35,290 --> 00:04:36,370 What am I gonna do with the degree? 63 00:04:36,540 --> 00:04:40,490 I'm gonna spend 8 hours a day trapped in a little cubicle, 64 00:04:40,660 --> 00:04:42,830 raking one of those desktop Zen Gardens. 65 00:04:42,830 --> 00:04:45,990 Hey, I prefer that over spending all your time with Malibu Barbie. 66 00:04:46,330 --> 00:04:48,160 Her name is Adelaide. 67 00:04:48,370 --> 00:04:51,870 She is a really sweet girl. You haven't even given her a chance. 68 00:04:52,040 --> 00:04:53,450 She is 16 years old. 69 00:04:53,620 --> 00:04:57,120 - She is applying to Stanford. - Anybody can apply to Stanford. 70 00:04:57,290 --> 00:04:59,660 - You want some of that? - At least I don't go online to meet girls. 71 00:04:59,830 --> 00:05:00,490 Heyyy now, 72 00:05:00,660 --> 00:05:03,990 God invented 'match.com' for a reason. 73 00:05:04,250 --> 00:05:06,240 And that reason was me. 74 00:05:07,500 --> 00:05:10,080 Look, one even replied to me last night. 75 00:05:10,870 --> 00:05:12,370 - You wouldn't like her though. - Why? 76 00:05:12,700 --> 00:05:14,200 - She's Asian. - Ah. 77 00:05:15,330 --> 00:05:17,200 No, but, I'm happy for you. 78 00:05:17,580 --> 00:05:19,740 - I hope she love you long time. - Thank you. 79 00:05:20,250 --> 00:05:21,660 Look, I gotta go. 80 00:05:21,870 --> 00:05:24,830 It's late, I gotta try to write something. 81 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:26,040 I'm still blocked, you know. 82 00:05:26,330 --> 00:05:29,290 Most of the writers have to write something first before getting blocked. 83 00:05:30,660 --> 00:05:33,200 You can't be impotent without first being potent. 84 00:05:33,660 --> 00:05:34,740 And what the hell was that? 85 00:05:35,250 --> 00:05:35,950 What? 86 00:05:36,330 --> 00:05:38,490 I know that's your dad calling... 87 00:05:39,250 --> 00:05:42,700 because you got that stupid little ring so that you know it's your dad calling. 88 00:05:43,120 --> 00:05:45,160 And by the way... He knows you send him to voice mail. 89 00:05:45,160 --> 00:05:46,290 - He doesn't know shit. - Yes, he does. 90 00:05:46,450 --> 00:05:47,370 Because you pushed End. 91 00:05:47,540 --> 00:05:49,870 You can't push End. It only rings twice and goes to voice mail. 92 00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:51,870 - You gotta let it go all the way through... - I don't wanna talk to him. 93 00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:54,290 Why? He's the one who support your heatedness to... 94 00:05:54,450 --> 00:05:55,990 My dad's a drunk. 95 00:05:57,040 --> 00:05:58,330 My dad's insane. You don't know my dad. 96 00:05:58,830 --> 00:05:59,910 Forget about your dad. 97 00:06:02,870 --> 00:06:04,410 And forget about Malibu Addy. 98 00:06:04,410 --> 00:06:06,910 Check out this blonde at the bar. She's gorgeous. 99 00:06:08,290 --> 00:06:09,240 Which one? 100 00:06:09,540 --> 00:06:12,490 The one in the pink, with the straw, sucking on that straw. 101 00:06:12,870 --> 00:06:13,790 Like she knows what she's doing. 102 00:06:14,080 --> 00:06:16,450 She's like an 8.9, at least. 103 00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:18,790 - 8.9? - Yeah. 104 00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:20,410 Let me tell you something, my friend. 105 00:06:20,830 --> 00:06:23,740 This girl represents everything that is wrong with this society. 106 00:06:24,250 --> 00:06:26,490 From her fake tits to her fake nose. 107 00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:29,700 That fake fucking smile. You see that? 108 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:31,620 To her fake fucking Dior bag. 109 00:06:31,910 --> 00:06:33,200 How do you know her bag's fake? 110 00:06:33,450 --> 00:06:34,200 You know what's the worst part? 111 00:06:34,410 --> 00:06:35,290 She gets away with that. 112 00:06:35,450 --> 00:06:38,740 She gets away with not having anything close to resembling a real personality. 113 00:06:40,080 --> 00:06:41,330 The bag looks real to me. 114 00:06:56,080 --> 00:06:57,240 Let me guess. 115 00:06:58,910 --> 00:07:01,330 - Capricorn? - Libra. 116 00:07:01,500 --> 00:07:03,540 Close enough, you wanna buy me a drink? 117 00:07:04,750 --> 00:07:06,330 What makes you think you deserve a drink? 118 00:07:07,290 --> 00:07:09,040 Uh, because I'm a good person. 119 00:07:09,410 --> 00:07:10,790 By Hollywood standards anyway; 120 00:07:11,120 --> 00:07:13,540 by normal standards, I'm a fucking asshole. 121 00:07:15,500 --> 00:07:18,120 Do you, do you think I'm a good person? 122 00:07:19,700 --> 00:07:20,740 Well, I don't even know you. 123 00:07:23,410 --> 00:07:28,120 Well, the truth is I think you're really cute. 124 00:07:28,580 --> 00:07:30,490 And I was compelled to meet you. 125 00:07:31,450 --> 00:07:35,330 And normally I wouldn't succumb to my compulsion so easily. 126 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:42,830 But I'm trying to embrace a new philosophy of life that involves succumbing. 127 00:07:44,170 --> 00:07:48,420 And I mean if I have to succumb, I'm glad I'm succumbing on you. 128 00:07:51,040 --> 00:07:51,790 Hey. 129 00:07:53,290 --> 00:07:55,290 Think of this drink as... 130 00:07:56,500 --> 00:08:04,120 ...as an investment for the possibility of mutual growth in this potential relationship. 131 00:08:05,040 --> 00:08:06,450 And years from now, 132 00:08:06,950 --> 00:08:10,660 when our daughter jumps into your lap, and asks you: 133 00:08:10,910 --> 00:08:12,870 Oh, how did mommy and daddy meet? 134 00:08:13,790 --> 00:08:15,450 You can look at this drink... 135 00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:19,660 ...as the best investment you've ever made. 136 00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:23,870 But I gotta know if you're really committed... 137 00:08:24,120 --> 00:08:27,490 ...to continuing this conversation before I waste my time. 138 00:08:28,330 --> 00:08:31,040 And just go talking and nothing happens. 139 00:08:33,580 --> 00:08:34,990 I'm Georgia, by the way. 140 00:08:36,070 --> 00:08:40,490 What a coincident! That's my favorite confederate state. 141 00:08:46,370 --> 00:08:48,990 You're not a very rich guy, are you? 142 00:08:51,020 --> 00:08:53,220 What gave that away, the generic brand cola? 143 00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:56,580 You don't got a lot of stuff. 144 00:08:58,330 --> 00:09:00,830 So maybe, maybe I'm not materialistic. 145 00:09:01,540 --> 00:09:03,290 Did Jesus have a lot of stuff? 146 00:09:03,750 --> 00:09:05,450 No, but Jesus was poor. 147 00:09:14,660 --> 00:09:16,620 So, what do you do for fun? 148 00:09:18,750 --> 00:09:19,830 This is pretty fun. 149 00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:26,450 I mean, what do you do for excitement? 150 00:09:27,950 --> 00:09:28,910 Good night. 151 00:09:46,500 --> 00:09:47,910 Are you OK? 152 00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:51,620 Yeah, I just have allergies, you know. 153 00:09:54,790 --> 00:09:57,080 Are you crying? Your face is wet. 154 00:09:58,160 --> 00:10:01,200 No, I'm OK. Just go to sleep. 155 00:10:36,330 --> 00:10:38,790 Hey, wake up! You have to go. 156 00:10:39,700 --> 00:10:40,410 What? 157 00:10:41,080 --> 00:10:43,040 Wake up! You have to go. I'm late. 158 00:10:43,540 --> 00:10:48,330 - Why? - Because I'm late. 159 00:10:48,540 --> 00:10:50,660 I feel like I'm talking to Helen Keller over here. 160 00:10:52,870 --> 00:10:54,370 You promised me breakfast. 161 00:10:55,080 --> 00:10:57,950 There's a bagel in the fridge. Knock yourself out. 162 00:11:16,750 --> 00:11:19,450 - I made you something. - What? 163 00:11:21,080 --> 00:11:22,450 I love brownies. 164 00:11:23,250 --> 00:11:27,040 I know, Liam, that's why I made them for you last night. 165 00:11:28,080 --> 00:11:32,240 - Thanks, you're so sweet. - Oh what can I say, I'm a sweetie pie. 166 00:11:35,580 --> 00:11:36,580 I'm good. 167 00:11:38,370 --> 00:11:39,080 What's that? 168 00:11:39,910 --> 00:11:44,200 - Ecole Des Art. What's that? - I'm applying to an art school in Paris. 169 00:11:45,120 --> 00:11:46,240 What about Stanford? 170 00:11:46,620 --> 00:11:48,870 - Ah, Stanford is boring. - What? 171 00:11:49,770 --> 00:11:51,810 That's what you wanna do for the rest of your life? 172 00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:55,660 Paint fruit and people dancing at tea parties? 173 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:58,790 I mean you're a bright girl, you know? You need a real education. 174 00:12:00,370 --> 00:12:02,540 Well, shouldn't you do what you're passionate about? 175 00:12:02,830 --> 00:12:05,950 Yes, yes, that all sounds great now. 176 00:12:05,950 --> 00:12:08,370 You're doing what you're love. You're doing what you're passionate about. 177 00:12:08,830 --> 00:12:12,040 But in 15 years, it won't be so great. 178 00:12:12,450 --> 00:12:15,870 When you're selling cotton candy on the Santa Monica promenade. 179 00:12:16,540 --> 00:12:17,620 So it's about money. 180 00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:20,990 I just don't want you to regret this. 181 00:12:22,950 --> 00:12:24,040 I don't know where to go. 182 00:12:26,870 --> 00:12:29,240 I have something important to ask you. 183 00:12:29,870 --> 00:12:31,330 You're in high school, what's important? 184 00:12:31,870 --> 00:12:34,580 You know, condescension is not the way to a girl's heart. 185 00:12:34,790 --> 00:12:35,830 Alright, I'm sorry. 186 00:12:38,250 --> 00:12:39,040 What do you wanna ask me? 187 00:12:40,410 --> 00:12:42,990 I'm sorry, I'm so sow-wy. 188 00:12:43,330 --> 00:12:45,450 - I'm so sow-wy. - Oh, my goodness. 189 00:12:45,910 --> 00:12:49,500 I know, I'm sorry. I can't do it like you can. What? 190 00:12:49,500 --> 00:12:54,120 I was going to ask you if you want to come to the junior prom with me? 191 00:12:55,500 --> 00:12:57,410 The junior prom. Wow. 192 00:12:58,220 --> 00:13:00,890 I'm sorry, Addy. I can't go to the junior prom with you. 193 00:13:01,330 --> 00:13:01,990 Why not? 194 00:13:02,370 --> 00:13:09,290 Why didn't you go with Alex, or Bowtar or Hawthorne or whatever they named them nowadays. 195 00:13:11,620 --> 00:13:13,290 'Cause I don't love them, Liam. 196 00:13:19,660 --> 00:13:20,620 All righty. 197 00:13:21,410 --> 00:13:22,870 Out of my car, Kiddo. 198 00:13:23,330 --> 00:13:25,240 Who're you calling kiddo, Buster? You know what? 199 00:13:25,540 --> 00:13:27,910 You better be careful 'cause one day you're gonna lose me. 200 00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:30,660 And it's gonna break your heart into a million little pieces. 201 00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:34,290 I could be the best thing that never happened to you and you'll regret it. 202 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:38,410 Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon, and for the rest of your life. 203 00:13:38,870 --> 00:13:42,040 Now if you excuse me, I have an algebra test to attend to. 204 00:13:45,700 --> 00:13:47,620 All right, I'll see you in another life, 205 00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:51,410 when we're both illustrious Peresian libertines. 206 00:13:52,290 --> 00:13:54,370 Or 3 p.m., whichever comes first. 207 00:14:22,700 --> 00:14:24,490 Liam, it's Mark Liu, your father. 208 00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:25,870 Where are you? 209 00:14:26,370 --> 00:14:27,580 Where are you anyway? 210 00:14:27,870 --> 00:14:28,660 Call me! 211 00:14:29,950 --> 00:14:33,450 Monday, 1:09 a.m. 212 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,450 Liam, why you not calling? 213 00:14:37,910 --> 00:14:39,160 Your grandmother is dead. 214 00:14:39,700 --> 00:14:41,200 This is Mark Liu, your father. 215 00:14:42,250 --> 00:14:45,410 Monday, 1:25 a.m. 216 00:15:00,250 --> 00:15:02,490 - Hello. - Yeah, I got your message. 217 00:15:03,500 --> 00:15:08,450 Maybe if a few more relatives die, you'll actually come to New York, huh? 218 00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:11,830 Can you give me a break? I'm just trying to make a living for myself out here. 219 00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:13,540 Oh, making a living for yourself? 220 00:15:13,950 --> 00:15:15,790 Without me sending you check every month. 221 00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:19,910 You'll be out in the street with all the others to be or not to be. 222 00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:21,370 You know, I'm sorry I called. 223 00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:23,830 She left you her house in Shanghai. 224 00:15:25,040 --> 00:15:26,830 Wait, what, what did you say? 225 00:15:27,370 --> 00:15:29,410 - She left me her house? - Yeah. 226 00:15:29,950 --> 00:15:32,790 Why... why did she leave it to me? I've never even met her. 227 00:15:33,250 --> 00:15:35,370 'Cause your last name is Liu. That's why. 228 00:15:35,620 --> 00:15:37,410 Or did you forget who you are, huh? 229 00:15:38,450 --> 00:15:39,490 How much does it worth? 230 00:15:39,660 --> 00:15:40,910 Five hundred Gs. 231 00:15:41,330 --> 00:15:43,200 That should last you until the end the month. 232 00:15:43,370 --> 00:15:46,120 You know, I'm sick of you criticizing my life. 233 00:15:46,330 --> 00:15:48,910 I have the right to criticize it. I'm paying for it. 234 00:15:50,120 --> 00:15:50,870 What about you? 235 00:15:51,500 --> 00:15:54,450 I can smell the whiskey on your breath right through the handset. 236 00:15:55,540 --> 00:15:57,700 I tell you what, I'll come home today... 237 00:15:58,040 --> 00:16:00,580 ...if you tell me you are not holding a bottle of Jack in your hand right now. 238 00:16:03,620 --> 00:16:04,870 Yeah, that's what I thought. 239 00:16:06,500 --> 00:16:08,240 You know what, I don't need your goddamn money. 240 00:16:08,830 --> 00:16:12,160 What are you gonna do, huh? Peddle cappuccinos at Starbucks? 241 00:16:12,330 --> 00:16:14,410 Well, you said I got 500 grand, right? 242 00:16:14,660 --> 00:16:16,740 That oughtta, that oughtta last me to the end of the month. 243 00:16:16,970 --> 00:16:20,300 I am your father, Liam. Why do you hate me? 244 00:16:20,300 --> 00:16:21,420 Because you killed my mother! 245 00:16:46,290 --> 00:16:47,200 Bunny! 246 00:16:53,700 --> 00:16:55,410 What's wrong? -Nothing 247 00:16:56,750 --> 00:16:58,490 What's wrong? Come on. 248 00:17:00,830 --> 00:17:03,080 I have to go to Shanghai for a week. 249 00:17:04,500 --> 00:17:06,830 Why are you going to Shanghai, silly rabbit? 250 00:17:07,870 --> 00:17:09,330 My grandmother died. 251 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:13,450 I'm sorry. 252 00:17:14,830 --> 00:17:18,330 I never met her or anything, but she left her house to me. 253 00:17:19,330 --> 00:17:22,660 My boyfriend has a house in Shanghai? That's really cool! 254 00:17:23,290 --> 00:17:25,410 Could you please not call me your boyfriend? 255 00:17:27,170 --> 00:17:31,170 So anyway, I have a cousin there, who'll find a buyer for it. And I have to go over there and sell the place. 256 00:17:37,580 --> 00:17:39,120 Dance with me, bunny! 257 00:17:41,290 --> 00:17:43,160 - I don't want to. - Come on. 258 00:18:28,700 --> 00:18:30,990 So can I go with you to Shanghai? 259 00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:33,040 You have school. 260 00:18:33,540 --> 00:18:36,200 But see, I don't have to go to school 'cause I'm a natural genius. 261 00:18:36,370 --> 00:18:39,330 Some people are just born to be natural geniuses. And we just can't help it. 262 00:18:39,500 --> 00:18:41,620 This natural genius is gonna stay right here in LA 263 00:18:41,830 --> 00:18:43,410 Please. 264 00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:45,580 I'm sorry. 265 00:18:46,330 --> 00:18:47,410 Call me every day. 266 00:18:47,910 --> 00:18:50,410 Every minute, every hour. 267 00:18:51,290 --> 00:18:54,700 Will you miss me so much, like, your intestines will bleed?! 268 00:18:54,950 --> 00:18:57,740 My intestines will spill buckets and buckets of blood. 269 00:18:58,020 --> 00:19:00,930 Oh, that's the sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me. 270 00:19:11,370 --> 00:19:12,870 I'll see you when I get back, OK? 271 00:19:14,580 --> 00:19:17,790 - OK? - Yeah. Bye, Liam. 272 00:19:36,290 --> 00:19:37,120 Do I look OK? 273 00:19:37,870 --> 00:19:39,080 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 274 00:19:39,370 --> 00:19:42,240 You look fine. Listen, Joe. 275 00:19:42,660 --> 00:19:46,120 I need you to do something for me while I'm in Shanghai. 276 00:19:46,660 --> 00:19:49,830 What? Wanna renew your subscription to Barely Legal? 277 00:19:50,700 --> 00:19:51,540 It's Addy. 278 00:19:51,750 --> 00:19:54,080 Oh, enough with Addy. Come on. 279 00:19:54,750 --> 00:19:57,160 I'm just... I'm gonna lay out a general rule here, ok? 280 00:19:57,500 --> 00:20:01,740 In America, if you hook up with a 16-year-old girl, 281 00:20:02,410 --> 00:20:06,290 you go to prison for roughly 20 years. And I'm not talking about Culver City. 282 00:20:06,450 --> 00:20:08,870 This is not about that; it's not about hooking up. 283 00:20:09,410 --> 00:20:12,910 Look, you're the cool older guy right now; 284 00:20:13,500 --> 00:20:16,910 but in ten years, you're just gonna be the old guy. 285 00:20:17,580 --> 00:20:20,450 Just take her to school in the morning, that's it. 286 00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:21,950 And make sure... 287 00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:23,540 Liam, she has parents. 288 00:20:23,910 --> 00:20:24,990 She's not little Orphan Annie. 289 00:20:24,990 --> 00:20:27,830 What do you want me to do? Give her some clam chowder and send her to bed? 290 00:20:28,660 --> 00:20:31,790 Shit! She was doing just fine before you got there. 291 00:20:33,370 --> 00:20:34,370 Yeah, you're right. You're right. 292 00:20:35,910 --> 00:20:37,120 - I just... - No, no, no. 293 00:20:38,410 --> 00:20:41,080 - I'm right. I like to hear that. - Alright, never mind, forget it. 294 00:20:44,450 --> 00:20:44,990 Shit! 295 00:20:45,500 --> 00:20:46,120 What? 296 00:20:47,410 --> 00:20:50,620 She was supposed to be here like an hour ago. She stood me up. 297 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:52,660 Maybe she got lost or something? 298 00:20:52,900 --> 00:20:57,320 No. She thinks I'm ugly, or Republican, or both. 299 00:20:57,620 --> 00:20:59,080 Yeah, what's with the brown suit? 300 00:20:59,290 --> 00:21:01,080 I mean, you look like Ronald Reagan. 301 00:21:01,290 --> 00:21:02,240 I asked you about this! 302 00:21:02,790 --> 00:21:04,120 Let me tell you what happened. 303 00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:07,480 This is what Darwin was talking about when he said natural selection. 304 00:21:07,790 --> 00:21:09,370 Only I'm the one that wasn't selected. 305 00:21:09,580 --> 00:21:11,790 Joe, women are absolutely everywhere, OK? 306 00:21:12,620 --> 00:21:14,330 See that girl at the counter? 307 00:21:14,750 --> 00:21:15,950 What do you give her? 308 00:21:16,700 --> 00:21:18,490 Solid 6. 309 00:21:19,120 --> 00:21:20,790 Yeah, if you flip her around, you get a 9. 310 00:21:22,410 --> 00:21:23,580 C'mon, go talk to her. 311 00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:25,120 - Come on, dude. - What? 312 00:21:25,410 --> 00:21:27,580 No, I can't. That's ridiculous. 313 00:21:27,790 --> 00:21:28,740 Why is that ridiculous? 314 00:21:28,950 --> 00:21:29,790 Are you kidding? 315 00:21:30,120 --> 00:21:32,580 Don't you think it's a little psycho just walking up to a girl? 316 00:21:32,910 --> 00:21:35,330 Yeah, it's psycho if you shank her in the shower afterwards. 317 00:21:37,580 --> 00:21:38,700 Alright. 318 00:21:40,620 --> 00:21:41,490 Yeah, don't bring a knife... 319 00:21:41,750 --> 00:21:42,540 I'm not bringing a knife. I'm just... 320 00:21:49,700 --> 00:21:51,410 Do I look like Ronald Reagan? 321 00:21:51,620 --> 00:21:52,370 You're on a good day. 322 00:21:56,830 --> 00:21:58,740 Hesitation doesn't get attention. 323 00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:05,990 Hi. 324 00:22:08,580 --> 00:22:09,240 Oh. 325 00:22:10,700 --> 00:22:11,790 Is this the butter? 326 00:22:21,870 --> 00:22:23,290 I hope your plane crashes. 327 00:22:23,700 --> 00:22:24,700 Maybe he's her brother? 328 00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:27,570 They kissed, what is she? Angelina Jolie? 329 00:22:29,370 --> 00:22:32,290 Can I order a big bowl of shame, please. 330 00:22:59,330 --> 00:23:00,580 Hey, that's me! 331 00:23:01,250 --> 00:23:02,240 - You're Liam? - Yes. 332 00:23:02,450 --> 00:23:04,580 - How nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you. Where did you get this? 333 00:23:04,870 --> 00:23:05,790 Your father send me. 334 00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:06,830 Do you like it? 335 00:23:07,290 --> 00:23:09,040 Eh, I don't know. 336 00:23:09,500 --> 00:23:11,490 Oh, my name is Lin Ming, your cousin. 337 00:23:11,720 --> 00:23:14,140 Lin Ming? Your name rhymes, that's beautiful. 338 00:23:14,410 --> 00:23:16,290 Thank you. Come on, let's go. 339 00:23:16,660 --> 00:23:18,370 Why didn't they give you the house? 340 00:23:18,910 --> 00:23:21,370 Actually, I'm not part of Liu family. 341 00:23:21,910 --> 00:23:24,490 The family name is just passed on through the sons. 342 00:23:24,790 --> 00:23:26,370 My mother married into the Ming family. 343 00:23:28,370 --> 00:23:29,290 Where am I staying? 344 00:23:30,700 --> 00:23:31,660 Jin Mao Tower. 345 00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:33,330 - Tower? - Yeah. 346 00:23:33,580 --> 00:23:35,410 - I'm staying in a tower? - Yes. 347 00:23:35,580 --> 00:23:36,620 What am I, Rapunzel? 348 00:25:14,700 --> 00:25:15,740 Thank you. 349 00:25:23,120 --> 00:25:26,370 - So, do we tip them or something? - No, not necessary. 350 00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:33,740 Please. 351 00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:36,660 Hey, how do you say "thank you"? 352 00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:40,700 Xia Ya Nong. (Chinese) 353 00:25:40,950 --> 00:25:42,410 No, no, no gratitude necessary. 354 00:25:42,650 --> 00:25:44,940 Oh, it's OK. I'm not being gratuitous, just giving you a tip. 355 00:25:45,410 --> 00:25:45,990 Thank you. 356 00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:48,740 Oh, no. We don't need to do anything here. 357 00:25:49,270 --> 00:25:50,310 - Really? - Yeah. 358 00:25:50,660 --> 00:25:52,830 - This is like Jewish heaven. - Yeah. 359 00:25:53,410 --> 00:25:55,580 OK, thank you for bringing the luggage here. 360 00:25:56,950 --> 00:25:58,620 Wow. Look at that. 361 00:26:03,580 --> 00:26:05,950 If I have a house here, why am I in a hotel? 362 00:26:08,120 --> 00:26:09,990 House empty, all furniture's gone. 363 00:26:10,700 --> 00:26:11,620 But don't worry. 364 00:26:11,830 --> 00:26:13,160 We'll meet the buyer tomorrow. 365 00:26:13,330 --> 00:26:15,910 You'll get the money and go back to America. 366 00:26:15,910 --> 00:26:17,240 - It's no problem. - OK. 367 00:26:18,660 --> 00:26:19,620 So what about tonight? 368 00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:21,330 What's the plan, Stan? 369 00:26:21,790 --> 00:26:23,370 You're Stan in this scenario, by the way. 370 00:26:23,660 --> 00:26:24,240 Okie dokie. 371 00:26:24,580 --> 00:26:25,910 What do you want to do? 372 00:27:24,750 --> 00:27:26,080 What the hell is this? 373 00:27:26,580 --> 00:27:27,370 Wasabi Pea. 374 00:27:27,790 --> 00:27:28,830 You can say that again. 375 00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:30,330 Wasabi Pea. 376 00:27:35,290 --> 00:27:37,540 (Chinese) Can I help you two with, anything? 377 00:27:38,160 --> 00:27:44,410 (Chinese) Right. He is an actor, from Hollywood; he makes movies. 378 00:27:44,870 --> 00:27:47,740 - You, America? - Yeah! 379 00:27:48,040 --> 00:27:50,290 You want to go for company? 380 00:27:50,950 --> 00:27:52,040 Go for what? 381 00:27:52,500 --> 00:27:53,910 For company! 382 00:27:55,830 --> 00:27:56,990 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 383 00:27:57,700 --> 00:28:00,040 Nice, nice, nice. 384 00:28:00,620 --> 00:28:02,660 You must have much money. 385 00:28:03,370 --> 00:28:05,080 Girls, (Chinese) come on in. 386 00:28:06,950 --> 00:28:07,790 (Chinese) Come in, come in. 387 00:28:09,450 --> 00:28:10,540 American. 388 00:28:11,450 --> 00:28:12,830 Smile, please. 389 00:28:13,250 --> 00:28:17,370 (Chinese) If you want money to go abroad, just smile. 390 00:28:18,870 --> 00:28:20,950 - Pick. - Pick? 391 00:28:21,330 --> 00:28:22,450 Do you like? 392 00:28:24,250 --> 00:28:26,790 Help me out here. I don't know which one should I pick. 393 00:28:27,080 --> 00:28:28,830 It's up to you, whatever your taste. 394 00:28:29,120 --> 00:28:30,830 I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings. 395 00:28:31,250 --> 00:28:33,870 You won't hurt feelings, just pick. 396 00:28:34,120 --> 00:28:37,290 I was never picked for dodgeball. It always hurt my feelings. 397 00:28:38,250 --> 00:28:40,290 OK, it's not a big deal. Just pick. 398 00:28:43,040 --> 00:28:46,160 Ah, look you like. 399 00:28:47,790 --> 00:28:50,580 Have your eye on Emmy. 400 00:28:50,870 --> 00:28:52,450 Emmy? Is that her name? 401 00:28:52,700 --> 00:28:55,830 Yeah, Emmy is very sweet. 402 00:28:56,450 --> 00:28:59,410 If you can touch her smell. 403 00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:03,330 Um, touch her smell. 404 00:29:03,570 --> 00:29:06,320 - OK, OK? - OK! 405 00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:07,990 Emmy. 406 00:29:08,620 --> 00:29:11,080 (Chinese) It's up to you now. 407 00:29:12,950 --> 00:29:15,040 Hi. 408 00:29:16,000 --> 00:29:16,740 Bye bye. 409 00:29:18,830 --> 00:29:20,040 She's crazy. 410 00:29:21,330 --> 00:29:22,200 Do you like her? 411 00:29:25,290 --> 00:29:26,200 My name is Emmy. 412 00:29:26,500 --> 00:29:29,000 - Emmy, my name is Liam. - Liam? 413 00:29:30,580 --> 00:29:34,240 - Funny kind of name. - Yeah, well, I'm a funny kind of guy. 414 00:29:35,700 --> 00:29:37,370 So you come here often? 415 00:29:38,200 --> 00:29:39,330 First come here. 416 00:29:39,700 --> 00:29:41,870 Oh, first come here... 417 00:29:43,410 --> 00:29:46,910 Em, I like your ear rings. 418 00:29:47,830 --> 00:29:49,620 No, not him, me. 419 00:29:50,080 --> 00:29:52,080 - I like the... you know. - Thank you. 420 00:29:52,330 --> 00:29:53,450 Yeah, very round. 421 00:29:54,830 --> 00:29:55,830 That's my favorite shape. 422 00:29:57,500 --> 00:29:59,870 OK, don't talk to him. He is not even there. 423 00:30:00,450 --> 00:30:02,370 Don't you have to go somewhere? 424 00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:04,200 All right. 425 00:30:22,830 --> 00:30:24,490 You should sing. 426 00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:26,830 I do not sing. 427 00:30:27,540 --> 00:30:30,290 If I sing, everybody in room will run. 428 00:30:31,290 --> 00:30:33,990 No, no, I'm sure you're not that bad. 429 00:30:34,200 --> 00:30:36,330 Trust me, that bad. 430 00:30:36,500 --> 00:30:38,160 OK, I believe you. 431 00:30:39,910 --> 00:30:41,580 Hey, you wanna go? 432 00:30:42,950 --> 00:30:43,790 You wanna go? 433 00:30:44,290 --> 00:30:45,490 OK. 434 00:30:46,250 --> 00:30:46,990 No, no. 435 00:30:47,500 --> 00:30:51,370 Us, you, me. We go, both of us. 436 00:30:52,660 --> 00:30:55,200 You want me to go with you? 437 00:30:58,580 --> 00:31:00,990 You want me to want you to go... 438 00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:02,950 ...with me? 439 00:31:05,540 --> 00:31:06,740 I'm confusing you. 440 00:31:07,330 --> 00:31:08,910 Let's go. You wanna go? 441 00:31:09,580 --> 00:31:10,410 I'm... 442 00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:17,080 Yes? You, me, you, me. Both! 443 00:31:17,620 --> 00:31:19,080 One, two, go. 444 00:31:25,290 --> 00:31:27,120 - Nice room. - Thanks. 445 00:31:29,910 --> 00:31:31,410 Great view. 446 00:31:36,830 --> 00:31:38,450 What do you want to do now? 447 00:31:39,750 --> 00:31:40,910 Whatever. 448 00:31:46,580 --> 00:31:48,160 You tell me. 449 00:31:55,550 --> 00:31:56,550 - Excuse me. - OK. 450 00:31:59,200 --> 00:31:59,830 Hello. 451 00:32:00,080 --> 00:32:03,290 Is this my very sexy Chinese man? 452 00:32:03,500 --> 00:32:04,540 How do you get this number? 453 00:32:04,700 --> 00:32:05,660 I have my ways. 454 00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:07,790 Remember, I'm a natural genius. 455 00:32:08,370 --> 00:32:09,910 I just got in a couple of hours ago. 456 00:32:10,250 --> 00:32:13,120 Well, why haven't you called me? I wonder, I wonder. 457 00:32:13,500 --> 00:32:15,490 My cousin was showing me around a little bit. 458 00:32:15,830 --> 00:32:17,040 Oh, what have you seen? 459 00:32:18,290 --> 00:32:23,790 Em, I saw a guy on a unicycle, saw a KFC... 460 00:32:24,160 --> 00:32:25,120 It's about it. 461 00:32:25,660 --> 00:32:28,740 - I'm going to take shower, OK? - OK, OK. 462 00:32:29,250 --> 00:32:30,620 Is someone there? 463 00:32:31,820 --> 00:32:35,030 I ordered room service. The girl was just bringing up late dinner. 464 00:32:35,870 --> 00:32:37,950 You know I can't really take that airplane food. 465 00:32:38,620 --> 00:32:41,330 Yeah, you and your sensitive digestive tract. 466 00:32:42,330 --> 00:32:44,160 How's, uh, how's Shanghai? 467 00:32:44,660 --> 00:32:45,660 It's beautiful. 468 00:32:46,270 --> 00:32:50,270 My hotel room is on the 85th floor. I can see Japan from my window. 469 00:32:50,790 --> 00:32:51,620 How's it look? 470 00:32:52,000 --> 00:32:55,410 Let's just say if they're planning a sneak attack anytime soon, I'll know. 471 00:32:55,830 --> 00:32:57,740 - Can I use your towel? - Yeah, yeah. 472 00:32:59,200 --> 00:33:00,240 Who is that? 473 00:33:00,580 --> 00:33:01,910 Um, television. 474 00:33:02,450 --> 00:33:04,830 Listen, I'm so tired, 475 00:33:05,160 --> 00:33:06,290 can I call you tomorrow? 476 00:33:07,540 --> 00:33:08,540 I miss you, bunny. 477 00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:11,040 OK, I'll be back soon. 478 00:33:11,870 --> 00:33:13,540 Get out of the house, alright? 479 00:33:14,080 --> 00:33:17,660 Go hang out with Summer or Marissa or one of the other girls on the OC 480 00:33:18,290 --> 00:33:19,370 Bye, Liam. 481 00:33:19,750 --> 00:33:21,120 Bye, Addy. 482 00:33:31,540 --> 00:33:36,450 OK. I finish. What do you want? Tell me. 483 00:33:37,290 --> 00:33:40,830 You know what? I'm really tired. 484 00:33:42,040 --> 00:33:43,540 Do you wanna go to sleep? 485 00:33:43,830 --> 00:33:44,740 Sleep? 486 00:33:45,290 --> 00:33:50,120 I was... I was on a flight, you know, for... for, I don't know, 16 hours. 487 00:33:50,500 --> 00:33:51,910 You know, an airplane. 488 00:33:53,750 --> 00:33:54,830 Do you mind? 489 00:33:55,700 --> 00:33:56,950 No, I don't mind. 490 00:33:57,250 --> 00:33:59,950 Because I like you. You're a really beautiful girl. 491 00:34:00,830 --> 00:34:01,830 Thank you. 492 00:34:02,620 --> 00:34:05,200 - So, is it OK? - OK. 493 00:34:06,450 --> 00:34:08,410 Alright. Good night. 494 00:34:08,620 --> 00:34:09,620 Good night. 495 00:35:36,120 --> 00:35:37,830 Hey, Liam. 496 00:35:38,830 --> 00:35:39,790 Let's go. 497 00:35:41,790 --> 00:35:43,490 Wake up. 3 p.m. 498 00:36:06,200 --> 00:36:07,660 So, this is it, huh? 499 00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:08,620 Yes. 500 00:36:18,330 --> 00:36:20,870 Your grandmother lived upstairs for 60 years. 501 00:36:21,160 --> 00:36:23,660 Your father born here. And grew up all his life. 502 00:36:25,370 --> 00:36:26,240 Be careful. 503 00:36:30,330 --> 00:36:32,540 Lots of history in this house. 504 00:36:36,790 --> 00:36:37,740 It's a share with this. 505 00:36:38,540 --> 00:36:40,370 But nobody here to take care of it. 506 00:36:44,250 --> 00:36:44,870 Wow! 507 00:36:46,830 --> 00:36:48,080 This view is amazing. 508 00:36:48,450 --> 00:36:53,450 Yes, it's Huangpu River. The most important shipping outlet of Shanghai. 509 00:36:54,410 --> 00:36:57,160 Divide the city into east and west. 510 00:36:59,950 --> 00:37:01,870 Come on, Liam. Let me show you. 511 00:37:05,330 --> 00:37:06,950 This was your father's room. 512 00:37:08,500 --> 00:37:10,830 The whole family lived here. 513 00:37:16,790 --> 00:37:19,120 - This place is great, I love it. - Yeah. 514 00:37:24,250 --> 00:37:25,830 It must be buyers. 515 00:37:29,200 --> 00:37:29,950 (Chinese) Just a minute. 516 00:37:34,120 --> 00:37:36,040 (Chinese) You must be Mr. Wu. 517 00:37:36,620 --> 00:37:37,700 (Chinese) Nice meeting you. 518 00:37:50,750 --> 00:37:52,450 (Chinese) Not so hard to find. The place is good. 519 00:37:56,870 --> 00:37:57,910 This is Mr. Wu. 520 00:38:00,330 --> 00:38:02,410 (Chinese) Mr. Wu, this is my cousin from America. 521 00:38:04,120 --> 00:38:05,990 (Chinese) You have an interesting cousin. 522 00:38:06,450 --> 00:38:08,160 (Chinese) Does he have a girlfriend yet? 523 00:38:08,790 --> 00:38:11,120 (Chinese) If he doesn't, he could become my son-in-law. 524 00:38:17,370 --> 00:38:19,330 I've never been to Shanghai before. 525 00:38:20,200 --> 00:38:25,160 So I'm surprised by how modern it is. You know, the architecture. 526 00:38:26,040 --> 00:38:27,120 Very modern. 527 00:38:30,700 --> 00:38:31,990 OK. 528 00:38:34,120 --> 00:38:35,490 I like your tie. 529 00:38:38,040 --> 00:38:39,450 Oh, look at that. 530 00:38:41,290 --> 00:38:48,740 (Chinese) We like this house, the sunlight, and the price. 531 00:38:49,700 --> 00:38:54,740 (Chinese) It's near the supermarket. Pretty good. 532 00:38:57,290 --> 00:38:57,910 So Liam, 533 00:38:59,250 --> 00:39:01,240 Mr. Wu said this place is so great. 534 00:39:01,790 --> 00:39:04,080 It's unbelievably cheap. 535 00:39:04,450 --> 00:39:06,910 Yeah, if you call 500,000 dollars cheap. 536 00:39:07,580 --> 00:39:12,660 No, no, no. It's not 500,000 dollars, it's 500,000 Yuan. 537 00:39:13,580 --> 00:39:14,950 How much is that in dollars? 538 00:39:15,950 --> 00:39:19,910 Maybe a little less than 60,000 dollars. 539 00:39:20,250 --> 00:39:22,290 Sixty thousand dollars? 540 00:39:22,660 --> 00:39:26,160 No, no, no, no. I'm not selling this place for 60,000. It's crazy. 541 00:39:26,580 --> 00:39:27,410 Are you crazy? 542 00:39:28,460 --> 00:39:32,040 - This view is worth more than 60,000 dollars. - Yeah, yeah, I know. 543 00:39:32,040 --> 00:39:33,910 My shoes are worth more than 60,000. 544 00:39:34,080 --> 00:39:35,950 Tell them no, tell them I'm not selling. It's ridiculous. 545 00:39:36,500 --> 00:39:37,490 OK. 546 00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:41,240 (Chinese) Mr. and Mrs. Wu, I'm sorry. This house is not for sale. 547 00:39:41,750 --> 00:39:44,160 (Chinese) We did not say anything about the price. 548 00:39:44,450 --> 00:39:47,910 (Chinese) You make the price. Not us. 549 00:39:50,160 --> 00:39:53,540 (Chinese) Your fault, not confirm the price first. Let's go back. 550 00:39:57,000 --> 00:39:57,740 What happened? 551 00:39:59,120 --> 00:40:00,240 I told them. 552 00:40:01,290 --> 00:40:02,580 I can see that. 553 00:40:03,500 --> 00:40:06,660 So, what are you going to do now? 554 00:40:46,120 --> 00:40:47,790 (Chinese) Hello, where to go? 555 00:40:48,290 --> 00:40:49,240 Jin Mao, please. 556 00:40:49,450 --> 00:40:52,370 - Jin Gao? - Jin Mao. 557 00:41:05,500 --> 00:41:06,160 Out. 558 00:41:06,790 --> 00:41:07,870 No, this is not it. 559 00:41:08,330 --> 00:41:09,160 Jin Gao. 560 00:41:09,620 --> 00:41:10,240 Jin Mao. 561 00:41:10,620 --> 00:41:11,370 Jin Gao. 562 00:41:11,750 --> 00:41:15,120 Jin Mao! Mao, Jin Mao, it's a hotel. 563 00:41:15,580 --> 00:41:18,660 Hotel? OK. 564 00:41:30,450 --> 00:41:31,790 No, not the place. 565 00:41:32,120 --> 00:41:35,990 - Hotel. - This is nothing, Jin Mao. 566 00:41:37,250 --> 00:41:38,160 Ting Gao? 567 00:41:38,500 --> 00:41:39,240 Jin Mao. 568 00:41:40,330 --> 00:41:41,370 Bing Gao? 569 00:41:41,660 --> 00:41:43,160 Look at my mouth, Jin Mao. 570 00:41:44,000 --> 00:41:45,490 (Chinese) This guy is so annoying. 571 00:41:46,120 --> 00:41:48,830 (Chinese) Doesn't know where he himself lives. 572 00:41:49,250 --> 00:41:50,410 Yeah, what? 573 00:41:51,660 --> 00:41:54,740 Oh, Oh yeah, look at that. 574 00:42:00,410 --> 00:42:01,080 Get out! 575 00:42:02,370 --> 00:42:03,740 What? Why you stop? 576 00:42:04,450 --> 00:42:06,240 Why you stop? I'm not getting out. 577 00:42:06,500 --> 00:42:07,540 Jin Jiang? 578 00:42:08,950 --> 00:42:10,160 Jin Mao. 579 00:42:10,870 --> 00:42:11,740 Get outta here! 580 00:42:12,080 --> 00:42:12,910 Jin Mao. 581 00:42:13,160 --> 00:42:15,620 - Jin Jiang? - Jin Mao, it's famous. 582 00:42:16,120 --> 00:42:17,990 It's the tallest building here. 583 00:42:18,410 --> 00:42:19,200 Jin Jiang. 584 00:42:19,450 --> 00:42:22,660 You've been driving me around the city all day. What are you, a fucking idiot? 585 00:42:28,290 --> 00:42:29,870 Where are you going? Get back here! 586 00:42:35,410 --> 00:42:36,080 Jin Jiang? 587 00:42:36,540 --> 00:42:37,450 Not Jin Jiang. 588 00:42:37,450 --> 00:42:39,740 Jin Mao! Jin Mao! Mao! Mao! Mao! 589 00:42:40,500 --> 00:42:42,700 Jin Jiang! Jiang! Jiang! 590 00:42:44,790 --> 00:42:48,540 You're gonna kill me! You're gonna kill me! You're gonna kill me! 591 00:42:49,410 --> 00:42:51,240 No, no, no. Jin Jiang. Jin Jiang. 592 00:42:52,580 --> 00:42:54,990 I need a drink. I need a drink. 593 00:42:55,370 --> 00:42:57,830 You're gonna drive me to drink. I need a drink. 594 00:43:00,370 --> 00:43:01,830 Can you take me to a bar? 595 00:43:02,270 --> 00:43:04,350 - Drink? - OK! OK! 596 00:43:09,830 --> 00:43:11,950 You guys know how to make a chocolate martini? 597 00:43:13,410 --> 00:43:15,700 What's that? Chocolate martini? 598 00:43:15,910 --> 00:43:16,660 You know martini? 599 00:43:16,910 --> 00:43:18,580 Yes, of course. You want a martini? 600 00:43:18,830 --> 00:43:22,990 No, chocolate martini. It's a martini, but you add some chocolate in it for flavoring. 601 00:43:23,820 --> 00:43:25,980 - OK? - OK, I do. 602 00:43:26,580 --> 00:43:29,040 A regular martini with chocolate in it. 603 00:43:29,750 --> 00:43:30,870 Chocolate martini. 604 00:43:32,500 --> 00:43:34,490 - (Chinese) The usual? - (Chinese) Yeah, please. 605 00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:52,200 Hi. 606 00:43:53,120 --> 00:43:53,870 I'm Liam. 607 00:43:55,370 --> 00:43:56,370 Micki. 608 00:43:56,700 --> 00:43:57,620 You speak English? 609 00:43:58,910 --> 00:43:59,830 You speak German? 610 00:44:01,320 --> 00:44:03,030 Why would I speak German? We're not in Germany. 611 00:44:03,410 --> 00:44:05,870 Why would I speak English? We're not in England. 612 00:44:06,080 --> 00:44:07,540 Because everybody speaks English. 613 00:44:08,120 --> 00:44:11,160 If that's true, then why you even asked me in the first place? 614 00:44:12,410 --> 00:44:13,200 Let me guess... 615 00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:16,990 You're an American and you think the world revolves around you. 616 00:44:18,160 --> 00:44:20,830 You probably don't speak any other languages besides English. 617 00:44:21,120 --> 00:44:23,620 That's not true. I speak Ethiopian. 618 00:44:28,000 --> 00:44:29,910 That means, armchair. 619 00:44:32,080 --> 00:44:33,830 Well, why don't you speak Chinese? 620 00:44:34,040 --> 00:44:35,040 Because I'm an American. 621 00:44:35,500 --> 00:44:36,660 You're not an American. 622 00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:37,950 Your face is Chinese. 623 00:44:38,580 --> 00:44:40,040 Your hair is Chinese. 624 00:44:40,290 --> 00:44:41,240 Your eyes are Chinese. 625 00:44:41,700 --> 00:44:43,040 Your skin is Chinese. 626 00:44:44,410 --> 00:44:47,200 But you probably don't know anything about your culture. 627 00:44:48,410 --> 00:44:50,790 It's a pity you don't even speak the language. 628 00:44:51,080 --> 00:44:52,490 I know more than you think. 629 00:44:52,700 --> 00:44:53,910 Here's your drink. 630 00:44:59,000 --> 00:45:01,080 Yes, I can see you're very wise. 631 00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:06,830 - Thanks. - Thank you. 632 00:45:08,830 --> 00:45:11,660 So what are you, that you're so cultured? A Pilates instructor? 633 00:45:12,620 --> 00:45:13,490 What's that? 634 00:45:14,830 --> 00:45:15,700 Never mind. 635 00:45:18,330 --> 00:45:19,740 Hey, you wanna get outta here? 636 00:45:20,330 --> 00:45:21,950 This conversation's depressing me. 637 00:45:23,410 --> 00:45:24,990 Eat your drink first. 638 00:45:28,540 --> 00:45:29,490 So beautiful. 639 00:45:29,750 --> 00:45:31,870 I never realized how beautiful Shanghai is. 640 00:45:32,330 --> 00:45:35,540 Most of these building were developed in the Opium Wars. 641 00:45:36,620 --> 00:45:39,450 Refresh my memory, Robert Downey Jr won the Opium Wars, right? 642 00:45:40,500 --> 00:45:41,290 Who's that? 643 00:45:42,700 --> 00:45:43,740 Never mind. 644 00:45:45,580 --> 00:45:47,790 You're so cute, and so funny. 645 00:45:48,450 --> 00:45:50,370 Yeah, but you don't laugh at, like, most of my jokes. 646 00:45:50,870 --> 00:45:51,910 You're still funny. 647 00:45:52,830 --> 00:45:54,370 Are all Americans so funny? 648 00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:56,790 You should know. You've been there 3 years, right? 649 00:45:59,250 --> 00:46:02,950 I use sense of humor as a defense mechanism when I'm nervous. 650 00:46:03,580 --> 00:46:05,040 At least that's what my analyst says. 651 00:46:05,870 --> 00:46:07,540 You're in analysis? 652 00:46:07,820 --> 00:46:11,440 Yeah, ever since the 2nd grade when I asked out Erin McGrath. 653 00:46:12,290 --> 00:46:15,910 She called me a doodie head and then pulled down my pants during recess. 654 00:46:16,620 --> 00:46:17,740 Oh! That's horrible. 655 00:46:18,700 --> 00:46:19,790 I can't really blame her... 656 00:46:20,000 --> 00:46:22,950 ...because I was quite empirically a doodie head. 657 00:46:23,800 --> 00:46:26,550 But then I got very self-conscious about my penis size. 658 00:46:27,790 --> 00:46:32,290 Um, I mean, you know, it was small, but I was seven. 659 00:46:32,660 --> 00:46:34,490 I think, for a 7-year-old, 660 00:46:35,790 --> 00:46:39,120 it was a decent size, I think. 661 00:46:55,580 --> 00:46:57,790 - Are you nervous? - Yeah, a little bit. 662 00:46:59,450 --> 00:47:01,580 Do I intimidate you? 663 00:47:03,450 --> 00:47:04,990 You have no idea. 664 00:47:20,120 --> 00:47:22,240 How was that? 665 00:47:23,850 --> 00:47:28,310 I'd say let's go back to my place, but I don't know where it is. 666 00:47:40,370 --> 00:47:41,490 Let me get this. 667 00:47:47,750 --> 00:47:48,450 Hello? 668 00:47:48,620 --> 00:47:50,290 I wrote you a poem, you wanna hear it? 669 00:47:52,700 --> 00:47:53,410 Uh, yeah, sure. 670 00:47:54,950 --> 00:47:59,370 I woke up lonely the day I died. The sun never sang to me so bright. 671 00:48:00,250 --> 00:48:05,910 The songs of heaven that dance inside my eyes. Watching a seagull fly and time stands still. 672 00:48:06,250 --> 00:48:09,160 As night turns the pavement red and I turn blue. 673 00:48:09,620 --> 00:48:13,700 I thought of you and only you. In the darkness, you will come. 674 00:48:14,450 --> 00:48:19,370 And dry my tears and rescue me, from the plastic cups and empty faces. 675 00:48:19,600 --> 00:48:21,760 My Shanghai Kid. My One and Only. 676 00:48:22,830 --> 00:48:25,120 For you I wait. Only God can stop me. 677 00:48:33,290 --> 00:48:37,120 Now if it totally sucks, you can tell me. I wrote it in like 5 minutes anyway. 678 00:48:37,290 --> 00:48:38,160 No, I like it. 679 00:48:41,790 --> 00:48:45,330 Um, you know, I gotta get off the bus. Can I call you later? 680 00:48:45,660 --> 00:48:46,290 Yeah. 681 00:48:47,870 --> 00:48:48,580 Bye, Addy. 682 00:48:57,870 --> 00:49:00,410 What was that ... your girlfriend? 683 00:49:01,870 --> 00:49:06,410 - No, she's just a friend. - Just a friend? 684 00:49:07,160 --> 00:49:11,790 - Give me a break, she's 16. - Why are you friends with a 16-year-old? 685 00:49:16,080 --> 00:49:16,990 I don't know. 686 00:49:22,370 --> 00:49:23,120 Excuse me. 687 00:49:26,870 --> 00:49:31,870 You disgust me! You make me puke! 688 00:49:32,290 --> 00:49:35,040 You make me sick! You make me fucking sick... 689 00:51:04,200 --> 00:51:08,790 - What's that? - Tea egg. Tea egg. 690 00:51:08,950 --> 00:51:10,120 - Egg? - Egg. 691 00:51:10,330 --> 00:51:12,290 Egg? Let's get some. I'm hungry. 692 00:51:13,330 --> 00:51:15,160 Hey, tea egg. 693 00:51:15,790 --> 00:51:20,040 Hello, hello, hello? Wake up, back to work. 694 00:51:20,700 --> 00:51:23,790 Hello, hello, hello. Ni Hao. Ni Hao. 695 00:51:24,620 --> 00:51:26,370 - How much? - One Yuan. 696 00:51:26,910 --> 00:51:31,120 One? One Yuan? That's like 12 cents. 697 00:51:31,540 --> 00:51:34,790 I want twelve. 698 00:51:38,790 --> 00:51:41,620 - So, how do you say twelve? - Twelve. 699 00:51:46,100 --> 00:51:50,180 Is this good? Wait, hold on. Taste time. 700 00:51:52,120 --> 00:51:56,290 - Why are you buying so many eggs? - I may not be a smart man. 701 00:51:56,750 --> 00:51:58,490 But I know a good bargain when I see one. 702 00:52:12,370 --> 00:52:15,370 - Wow! - What? 703 00:52:16,040 --> 00:52:17,580 In this light, you're stunning. 704 00:52:19,790 --> 00:52:20,910 You're a stunner. 705 00:52:24,200 --> 00:52:26,240 I'm actually physically stunned. 706 00:52:27,950 --> 00:52:31,990 - Well, you're not the ugliest guy I've ever met either. - OK, OK. Relax. 707 00:52:35,540 --> 00:52:40,290 So, why would you sell a house that's been in your family for 100 years? 708 00:52:41,750 --> 00:52:45,240 - What am I gonna do? Move to China? - Why not? 709 00:52:45,750 --> 00:52:50,620 - You're Chinese, aren't you? - Why not? Why don't I do anything that makes any sense? 710 00:52:50,790 --> 00:52:55,080 Why did I drop out of Columbia and move to LA to be an aspiring alcoholic? 711 00:52:55,500 --> 00:52:59,910 Why is it that the only girl that I can stand being sober with, for more than an hour, 712 00:53:00,080 --> 00:53:04,540 present company excluded, happens to be 16? Why can't I look my father in the face? 713 00:53:11,410 --> 00:53:12,330 You're right! 714 00:53:16,100 --> 00:53:22,060 I spent my entire life running away from anything Chinese, including my father. 715 00:53:23,080 --> 00:53:24,450 But I come here... 716 00:53:27,580 --> 00:53:29,160 ...and I feel like I belong here. 717 00:53:32,700 --> 00:53:35,870 Here, I'm not a Chinese guy. I'm just a guy. 718 00:53:40,660 --> 00:53:45,160 - Don't move here just for me. - Do you wanna see me again? 719 00:53:45,970 --> 00:53:48,420 - Of course! - Would you miss if I left? 720 00:53:49,040 --> 00:53:50,120 Would you miss me? 721 00:53:53,370 --> 00:53:57,200 You are the most amazing girl I've ever met! 722 00:56:19,170 --> 00:56:23,250 - Hey! Chow Yun Fat! - Hey! We're both fat. 723 00:56:23,570 --> 00:56:27,240 No, no, no, no, I'm sorry it's not him. It's the guy from Ramen Noodle package. 724 00:56:27,580 --> 00:56:28,700 And you're the noodle. 725 00:56:29,580 --> 00:56:31,490 So, how was the People's Republic? 726 00:56:31,870 --> 00:56:33,290 - It's amazing. - Yeah? 727 00:56:33,450 --> 00:56:37,330 It's so beautiful there, Joe. It really is. And I met a girl. 728 00:56:38,080 --> 00:56:41,370 - What? Like a Chinese girl? - I met a Chinese girl! 729 00:56:41,540 --> 00:56:43,200 No way! Really? 730 00:56:43,370 --> 00:56:44,200 - Yeah. - Really? 731 00:56:44,820 --> 00:56:47,270 - What's her name? - Her name is Micki. 732 00:56:47,600 --> 00:56:49,510 - That doesn't sound Chinese. - She's beautiful. 733 00:56:49,870 --> 00:56:55,290 - She's smart, sophisticated, funny. - And she's with you? 734 00:56:56,950 --> 00:56:59,700 - It's a shame you had to leave. - Actually I'm gonna move there. 735 00:56:59,980 --> 00:57:00,970 - What? 736 00:57:01,250 --> 00:57:02,520 - I'm moving to Shanghai. 737 00:57:03,290 --> 00:57:04,790 - When? - Next week! 738 00:57:06,750 --> 00:57:11,450 I just, I came back to, you know, get some things, say good bye. 739 00:57:12,910 --> 00:57:14,120 It's pilot season. 740 00:57:15,450 --> 00:57:17,910 There are no Asian guys on television. You know that. 741 00:57:20,290 --> 00:57:21,410 So, did you tell your father? 742 00:57:21,820 --> 00:57:24,320 - Does Addy know? Anybody? - No, not yet. 743 00:57:24,660 --> 00:57:27,490 - Don't you think you outta tell them? - I will, I will. 744 00:57:27,770 --> 00:57:31,100 - Your father's gonna be a little surprised. - I don't ca-, I don't give a shit what he thinks. 745 00:57:32,120 --> 00:57:33,660 Listen to yourself, man! 746 00:57:34,050 --> 00:57:38,090 You're moving to Shanghai for a girl. A Chinese girl, for God's sakes. 747 00:57:38,370 --> 00:57:40,950 - This is not just about the girl. - Then what is it? 748 00:57:41,950 --> 00:57:44,950 It just, it feels right. 749 00:57:45,540 --> 00:57:48,000 I'm Chinese. I gotta go back to my roots. 750 00:57:48,250 --> 00:57:52,410 Alright, slow down, Kunta Kinte. You don't even speak Chinese. 751 00:57:52,790 --> 00:57:55,300 What the hell are you gonna do? What, drive a rickshaw? 752 00:57:55,400 --> 00:57:56,800 I can learn Chinese. 753 00:57:56,950 --> 00:57:59,100 Learn Chinese?!? Liam, you barely speak English. 754 00:57:59,250 --> 00:58:06,500 - Don't call me Liam, Liam is my slave name. - Cute. - Wait, come here, come here. - What? 755 00:58:06,600 --> 00:58:14,040 - That's her. - Wow, she, uh, she sure looks like every other Asian girl in Monterey Park. 756 00:58:14,700 --> 00:58:16,040 - What? - Look, you wanna move somewhere? 757 00:58:16,200 --> 00:58:18,120 Move to Monterey Park, it's lovely. 758 00:58:18,750 --> 00:58:20,470 I'll miss you too. 759 00:58:20,720 --> 00:58:23,320 Come on, get in. And give me 5 bucks for parking. 760 00:58:24,150 --> 00:58:26,950 - So you came back early. - You know the sale failed, sweetie. 761 00:58:27,200 --> 00:58:29,070 - Oh, you didn't sell your house? - No. 762 00:58:29,350 --> 00:58:30,890 What're you going to do now, baby? 763 00:58:31,620 --> 00:58:34,080 Well, please don't call me "baby". 764 00:58:34,450 --> 00:58:37,150 Baby, baby, baby, baby, ba-by. 765 00:58:37,150 --> 00:58:39,440 - I have something to tell you. - Good news? 766 00:58:39,440 --> 00:58:41,950 - In a way. - Let me guess. 767 00:58:41,950 --> 00:58:44,520 - You're pregnant. - No, that was last month. 768 00:58:44,520 --> 00:58:46,000 I got it aborted. 769 00:58:46,000 --> 00:58:49,320 Oh, that's too bad. I always wanna be a father. 770 00:58:55,990 --> 00:58:57,400 So what's this news? 771 00:58:59,250 --> 00:59:00,540 This is hard to say. 772 00:59:00,750 --> 00:59:02,500 Oh, spill it, bust it, come on! 773 00:59:03,040 --> 00:59:05,290 Well, I think that we should stop. 774 00:59:05,290 --> 00:59:08,450 Oh, sugar salad. Give me those, please. Yeah, sure. 775 00:59:08,830 --> 00:59:10,540 You're the bestest boyfriend ever... 776 00:59:11,160 --> 00:59:16,700 Yeah, OK, Addy you're a great girl. You're beautiful, and smart, and strong, 777 00:59:16,700 --> 00:59:18,450 and you shouldn't be hanging around with me. 778 00:59:18,910 --> 00:59:20,450 You should be with a guy your own age. 779 00:59:22,250 --> 00:59:24,950 I'm gonna be 17 in, like, two weeks. 780 00:59:25,580 --> 00:59:28,200 What are you? Like 8 years older than me? 781 00:59:29,170 --> 00:59:30,010 12! 782 00:59:31,600 --> 00:59:32,640 Big deal. 783 00:59:33,080 --> 00:59:35,790 You even look like you're twelve. I'm even, almost taller than you. 784 00:59:35,950 --> 00:59:38,870 Look, It's not my fault that my "upper-physial" plates fused immaturely. 785 00:59:39,040 --> 00:59:40,540 - Apophyseal! - Apophyseal 786 00:59:40,700 --> 00:59:43,370 - Did you drink milk? - Yes, I drank milk. 787 00:59:43,370 --> 00:59:46,030 Whole or 2% fat? Did you drink fat free? 788 00:59:46,320 --> 00:59:48,920 What percent milk I drank is not the point. 789 00:59:49,220 --> 00:59:51,500 The point is I can drive and drink alcoholic beverages. 790 00:59:51,850 --> 00:59:54,520 Not at the same time. What's your point? 791 00:59:55,460 --> 00:59:58,020 Look, Woody Allen was with a woman 35 years younger than him. 792 00:59:58,020 --> 01:00:00,020 Woody Allen has 3 Academy awards. 793 01:00:00,020 --> 01:00:03,450 When I get 3 Academy awards I can date 12-year-olds if I want. 794 01:00:05,620 --> 01:00:06,700 I met someone. 795 01:00:11,700 --> 01:00:13,450 - Really? - Yeah. 796 01:00:16,830 --> 01:00:17,870 Is it a girl? 797 01:00:19,370 --> 01:00:22,270 No, it's an squirrel, actually. What are you talking about, is it a girl?? 798 01:00:22,650 --> 01:00:24,650 I don't know, you're uppity metro. 799 01:00:25,910 --> 01:00:28,160 It's a Chinese girl, I met her in China. 800 01:00:28,510 --> 01:00:31,570 What can I get for you? We're gonna take a sugar salad-... 801 01:00:35,660 --> 01:00:40,160 You're gone, for like 3 days. 3 days! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 802 01:00:40,330 --> 01:00:41,620 I don't know what you want me to say. 803 01:00:43,290 --> 01:00:44,660 I feel so shitty now. 804 01:00:47,160 --> 01:00:48,410 Don't feel shitty. 805 01:00:49,500 --> 01:00:54,200 Let's go get the sugar salads. No, fuck sugary salad! Fuck her up her sugary ass. 806 01:00:54,450 --> 01:00:59,030 - You're dumping me for some Chinese girl? - We were never really together. 807 01:00:59,650 --> 01:01:02,150 Oh, right. I forgot, I'm only 16. 808 01:01:02,650 --> 01:01:06,820 How are you gonna maintain the relationship with someone 7-thousands-miles-away? 809 01:01:08,040 --> 01:01:09,490 I'm moving to Shanghai. 810 01:01:11,250 --> 01:01:13,200 What? I'm moving there. 811 01:01:14,650 --> 01:01:18,610 To Shanghai? Who moves to Shanghai? No one does that. 812 01:01:18,850 --> 01:01:21,480 No one move to Shanghai. I don't know, lots of people. 813 01:01:21,480 --> 01:01:24,560 I don't know. It just feels right. 814 01:01:25,750 --> 01:01:27,950 You'll just leave me here to rot? 815 01:01:29,270 --> 01:01:30,390 Leave you here to rot? 816 01:01:30,700 --> 01:01:33,990 You live in Beverly Hills for Christ's sake. I wish I live where you lived. 817 01:01:35,370 --> 01:01:37,740 Please just go see this movie, please. 818 01:01:39,120 --> 01:01:40,870 I'm gonna get you a sugar salad. 819 01:01:41,830 --> 01:01:43,450 Don't you have any feelings at all? 820 01:01:44,040 --> 01:01:46,620 I mean your grandmother died. Don't you feel sad about that? 821 01:01:52,660 --> 01:01:55,370 Don't you feel sad about anything? You're like a fucking robot. 822 01:01:55,370 --> 01:01:58,740 Now you're going to China for some girl you've only known for 2 days. 823 01:02:02,450 --> 01:02:04,660 Do you really think that you'll gonna find what you looking for out there? 824 01:02:04,830 --> 01:02:07,080 You need to calm down. I'm going outside. 825 01:02:10,330 --> 01:02:12,490 Wait, just, just wait. 826 01:02:14,250 --> 01:02:18,170 I like you, Addy, I really do. It scares me how much I like you. 827 01:02:18,450 --> 01:02:19,660 Then why are you leaving? 828 01:02:21,620 --> 01:02:26,040 Because I feel empty here. It's like I'm pissing my life away. 829 01:02:26,580 --> 01:02:29,740 LA is a cold and desolate place, Addy. It really is. 830 01:02:29,910 --> 01:02:33,790 - It's like sucking the life right out of me. - Maybe it's you, Liam. You ever think about that, huh? 831 01:02:34,950 --> 01:02:38,360 - Maybe it's you sucking the life outta yourself. - You're just a just a kid. Addy. 832 01:02:41,790 --> 01:02:42,620 Go home. 833 01:02:44,120 --> 01:02:46,330 Don't go to Shanghai, please. 834 01:02:47,120 --> 01:02:50,330 It'll be a mistake, you know it'll be a mistake. 835 01:05:24,000 --> 01:05:24,620 (Checkmate!) 836 01:05:41,150 --> 01:05:44,690 Excuse me, Mister. Do you speak English? 837 01:05:46,620 --> 01:05:48,740 I need an umbrella. 838 01:05:52,200 --> 01:05:53,370 Raining, raining. 839 01:06:02,370 --> 01:06:03,290 (Chinese) Excuse me. 840 01:06:08,540 --> 01:06:09,540 (Chinese) Where to... 841 01:06:13,200 --> 01:06:14,080 (Chinese) buy... 842 01:06:15,750 --> 01:06:16,620 (Chinese) umbrella... 843 01:06:18,120 --> 01:06:23,740 There are umbrellas right there. Thank you, thank you. 844 01:06:25,380 --> 01:06:27,290 (Chinese) Raining? Raining? 845 01:06:40,820 --> 01:06:44,480 Let's go to McDonald. This food is scaring me. 846 01:06:44,750 --> 01:06:46,990 That stuff will kill you faster than poison. 847 01:06:47,250 --> 01:06:51,370 Somewhere out there is a bunch of angry feet-less chicken. 848 01:06:52,660 --> 01:06:55,700 Didn't your mother ever tell you not play with your food. 849 01:06:56,000 --> 01:06:57,330 I don't know. I have no mother. 850 01:06:58,160 --> 01:06:59,450 Everybody has a mother. 851 01:07:02,290 --> 01:07:05,490 You OK? Yeah, I'm fine. It's just. 852 01:07:06,600 --> 01:07:07,850 I don't really remember her. 853 01:07:09,200 --> 01:07:11,120 I mean I have memories, but... 854 01:07:11,330 --> 01:07:15,330 I don't know which ones are real and which ones I created because I needed them. 855 01:07:19,830 --> 01:07:25,620 We don't have to talk about this. No, it's good, it's good to talk about it. 856 01:07:30,570 --> 01:07:33,700 - So what happened? - Well it was my birthday. I was six... 857 01:07:34,580 --> 01:07:37,040 and we were coming home from dinner. 858 01:07:37,620 --> 01:07:41,250 We didn't have much money then, so going out to eat was special. 859 01:07:43,290 --> 01:07:45,740 Um, so I wanted to order something special, 860 01:07:46,620 --> 01:07:51,790 and after looking over the menu for 30 minutes I saw that they had turtle soup. 861 01:07:52,580 --> 01:07:58,290 And I thought, wow, wouldn't it be cool to go to school on Monday and tell everyone that I had turtle. 862 01:07:59,750 --> 01:08:06,450 But on the way to the bathroom I saw the live turtle in the kitchen, 863 01:08:06,450 --> 01:08:11,120 and I started crying. I could never eat such a good animal. 864 01:08:12,000 --> 01:08:17,660 And so I burst into the kitchen, like a knight rescuing a princess, 865 01:08:18,160 --> 01:08:25,790 And I grabbed the turtle and I burst out, right? And after my parents calm down the kitchen, 866 01:08:26,550 --> 01:08:31,800 My mom said that I could keep the turtle. As a birthday present. 867 01:08:33,150 --> 01:08:37,030 So it was sitting on my lap, in the car, and my father was driving, 868 01:08:38,300 --> 01:08:40,510 he may have been drunk, 869 01:08:40,790 --> 01:08:45,020 I'm not sure, but they started arguing in Chinese. 870 01:08:45,020 --> 01:08:47,670 Every time they argue in Chinese I know something's wrong. 871 01:08:50,580 --> 01:08:55,950 The rest is a blur. The next thing I know, the car is flipped upside down on the side of the road. 872 01:08:56,970 --> 01:09:00,550 There's this shard of glass jutting from my mother's neck. 873 01:09:01,050 --> 01:09:03,300 Blood's dripping down her white blouse. 874 01:09:06,120 --> 01:09:08,200 I never did found out what happened to the turtle. 875 01:09:12,350 --> 01:09:13,690 You wanna go see a movie? 876 01:09:14,720 --> 01:09:17,620 You have movies here, right? 877 01:09:17,620 --> 01:09:21,000 - Of course. - Let me go to the men's room then we can go see a movie. 878 01:09:34,520 --> 01:09:38,140 - I can't watch this. - Why not? 879 01:09:39,220 --> 01:09:42,630 Because the Rock sounds like Richard Simmons. That's why not. 880 01:09:43,850 --> 01:09:47,100 - Who is Richard Simmons? - Never mind. 881 01:09:50,370 --> 01:09:51,370 Who's the Rock? 882 01:09:55,330 --> 01:09:57,790 I'm gonna get something to drink. I'll be right back. 883 01:10:14,830 --> 01:10:17,740 Hey, you've reached Addy. She's not here right now, to take your call. 884 01:10:18,220 --> 01:10:19,460 I know, 'cause I'm her. 885 01:10:39,500 --> 01:10:40,240 Get in the car! 886 01:10:41,660 --> 01:10:43,830 Did you say get in the car? Why would I get in the car? 887 01:10:44,070 --> 01:10:44,780 (Chinese) Grab him! 888 01:10:52,520 --> 01:10:55,600 - Get in the car? - OK? OK? 889 01:10:56,370 --> 01:10:57,080 Yeah. 890 01:11:17,320 --> 01:11:18,070 You hit me. 891 01:11:19,580 --> 01:11:22,450 Yes, very good, very smart. 892 01:11:23,320 --> 01:11:26,690 And people are always complaining about the American education system. 893 01:11:31,070 --> 01:11:31,820 What do you want? 894 01:11:34,040 --> 01:11:34,910 Where are you from? 895 01:11:39,290 --> 01:11:42,580 Here and there, I get around. 896 01:11:44,670 --> 01:11:45,710 Where are you from?! 897 01:11:48,040 --> 01:11:49,490 I'm from Los Angeles. 898 01:11:51,870 --> 01:11:53,120 California! 899 01:11:54,620 --> 01:11:56,670 It's beautiful there isn't it? 900 01:11:56,670 --> 01:11:59,420 It's OK. Beautiful women too. 901 01:12:00,520 --> 01:12:03,980 I've never been myself. But I watch Hollywood movies. 902 01:12:04,420 --> 01:12:06,830 Like, um, Charlie's Angels. 903 01:12:07,150 --> 01:12:10,110 You've seen Charlie's Angels? It's not one of my favorites. 904 01:12:13,700 --> 01:12:16,330 - I found the plot to be lacking... - Plot??!?! 905 01:12:18,790 --> 01:12:22,160 Who needs plot when you have crazy American women running around? 906 01:12:22,540 --> 01:12:23,200 Right? 907 01:12:25,370 --> 01:12:27,240 There's something doesn't make sense to me. 908 01:12:28,750 --> 01:12:34,040 You see you have Charlie's Angels and crazy American girls... 909 01:12:35,790 --> 01:12:38,790 Yet you still feel the need to come here and steal our women. 910 01:12:40,540 --> 01:12:41,990 I don't know what you're talking about. 911 01:12:43,370 --> 01:12:45,910 I'm talking about my girlfriend. Micki. 912 01:12:48,500 --> 01:12:53,540 Lately she's been acting very strange. Always busy. 913 01:12:55,650 --> 01:12:57,190 You know what she's doing every day? 914 01:13:00,620 --> 01:13:01,700 I have no idea. 915 01:13:04,450 --> 01:13:05,870 Who do you think you are? 916 01:13:06,620 --> 01:13:08,870 You Americans think you can take anything you want? 917 01:13:10,000 --> 01:13:12,370 - I don't think that. - You don't think that?!? 918 01:13:12,540 --> 01:13:16,200 Who discovered America? Who discovered America?! 919 01:13:16,600 --> 01:13:18,520 Christopher Columbus? 920 01:13:18,770 --> 01:13:21,220 Oh, I forget. That's want you learned in school, right? 921 01:13:22,400 --> 01:13:26,120 But I want to find out... how he can discover a country... 922 01:13:26,120 --> 01:13:29,360 with already more than 40 million native Americans? Where are they now? 923 01:13:30,720 --> 01:13:34,760 They welcomed you with open arms. And you killed them all. 924 01:13:36,320 --> 01:13:38,040 I guess we have different text book, huh? 925 01:13:38,040 --> 01:13:43,820 Look, I'm Chinese. My parents went to America as immigrants. 926 01:13:45,160 --> 01:13:47,080 You will never be Chinese. 927 01:13:48,290 --> 01:13:50,790 You were raised on cheese burgers and pizza. 928 01:13:52,040 --> 01:13:54,200 You may think you have discovered China. 929 01:13:54,370 --> 01:13:56,700 But we have been here for thousands of years. 930 01:13:56,910 --> 01:14:00,040 And I'm not gonna stand around watch you take what's rightfully mine. 931 01:14:04,000 --> 01:14:04,660 (Chinese) Stop the car! 932 01:14:52,040 --> 01:14:54,490 Hi, you have a phone that I can use? 933 01:14:55,620 --> 01:14:57,830 Telephone? I can use? 934 01:15:01,660 --> 01:15:02,660 You have a... 935 01:15:14,800 --> 01:15:16,170 Hi, you have phone? 936 01:15:16,580 --> 01:15:18,240 Phone? (Japanese) Phone? 937 01:15:24,370 --> 01:15:26,700 Sir, do you have a phone? 938 01:15:28,660 --> 01:15:31,580 - Hey! - Hey! 939 01:15:32,200 --> 01:15:34,490 Ma'am. Ma'am. Can I use your phone? 940 01:15:34,790 --> 01:15:36,080 Please, please, please! 941 01:15:38,670 --> 01:15:41,420 Here, look, look! 942 01:15:41,750 --> 01:15:45,040 I give you this. You let me use that? 943 01:15:45,450 --> 01:15:48,330 OK? Can I use that? I'll give you money? 944 01:15:49,200 --> 01:15:51,290 Look! Look! 945 01:15:51,450 --> 01:15:52,870 (Chinese) I'm not gonna sell you my phone. 946 01:15:53,580 --> 01:15:56,370 This is all I have, OK? Take it. 947 01:15:56,370 --> 01:16:00,780 - (Chinese) Borrow? - I'll give it right back. I'll be right here. - (Chinese) My long-distance is expensive. 948 01:16:01,070 --> 01:16:02,660 Ma'am, please. 949 01:16:02,950 --> 01:16:06,370 - Thank you, see, good, happy. - (Chinese) What's with you? 950 01:16:10,830 --> 01:16:11,660 Thank you. 951 01:16:14,770 --> 01:16:15,360 Micki! 952 01:16:22,040 --> 01:16:23,870 I wanted to tell you... 953 01:16:24,580 --> 01:16:28,330 I really did. But Jai Lee is not the most reasonable man. 954 01:16:29,500 --> 01:16:30,620 He gets violent. 955 01:16:31,500 --> 01:16:33,790 He beat you? Who is this guy? 956 01:16:35,200 --> 01:16:36,620 We're to be married. 957 01:16:37,870 --> 01:16:41,950 That's terrific. Congratulations. Am I invited to the wedding? 958 01:16:42,410 --> 01:16:44,910 - You don't understand. - (Chinese) Sir, what would you like to order? 959 01:16:45,910 --> 01:16:47,450 A bowl of wontons please. 960 01:16:47,870 --> 01:16:52,120 - (Chinese) I'm sorry, I don't understand. - Wontons... 961 01:16:52,620 --> 01:16:54,790 - (Chinese) A bowl of wontons. - Yes, thank you. 962 01:16:54,950 --> 01:16:56,240 What don't I understand? 963 01:16:57,850 --> 01:16:58,680 Do you love him? 964 01:17:01,080 --> 01:17:03,740 It's not about love. Then what? 965 01:17:06,370 --> 01:17:08,160 I used to work as a waitress. 966 01:17:09,500 --> 01:17:13,700 And about a year ago Jai Lee comes in, throwing his money around 967 01:17:14,270 --> 01:17:17,980 Telling me how beautiful I am. And how he wants to take care of me. 968 01:17:19,620 --> 01:17:21,580 So this is all about money. 969 01:17:24,580 --> 01:17:28,370 - See, that's why you would never understand. - What don't I understand? 970 01:17:29,580 --> 01:17:31,290 You are what we call a gold digger. 971 01:17:35,570 --> 01:17:39,280 - How many siblings do you have? - I don't have any. 972 01:17:39,830 --> 01:17:43,620 I have five. Three sisters and two brothers. 973 01:17:44,120 --> 01:17:46,040 How much does the average American make? 974 01:17:48,150 --> 01:17:51,280 I don't know. Maybe 35,000. 975 01:17:52,300 --> 01:17:54,630 I make 1200 a year. 976 01:17:55,700 --> 01:17:59,290 My family, all seven of us. Live in a one bedroom apartment. 977 01:18:00,320 --> 01:18:01,740 My father died years ago. 978 01:18:02,410 --> 01:18:04,910 Leaving my mother to raise all of us. All by herself. 979 01:18:05,750 --> 01:18:07,700 So no, this is not about love. 980 01:18:08,830 --> 01:18:12,330 I'm with Jai Lee to ensure my family have a better life. 981 01:18:13,720 --> 01:18:17,710 You are gonna stay in a loveless and abusive marriage for the rest of your life? 982 01:18:20,870 --> 01:18:24,410 Trust me. There are worse things. 983 01:18:28,120 --> 01:18:30,870 (Chinese) Sir, here's your wontons. Thank you. 984 01:18:40,620 --> 01:18:41,450 You're hungry. 985 01:18:42,290 --> 01:18:43,830 Well, getting the shit beat out of me, 986 01:18:44,330 --> 01:18:47,080 Spending the night in a ditch, can be pretty consuming. 987 01:18:47,950 --> 01:18:49,990 But on the upside, I did my cardio for the week. 988 01:18:54,120 --> 01:18:55,660 Go back to America! 989 01:19:00,620 --> 01:19:01,410 What about you? 990 01:19:04,950 --> 01:19:05,870 I'll be fine. 991 01:19:10,950 --> 01:19:11,990 (Chinese) Welcome back here. 992 01:19:12,830 --> 01:19:14,740 (Chinese) Sorry for last time. 993 01:19:14,910 --> 01:19:18,410 (Chinese) I've discussed with my cousin... 994 01:19:22,620 --> 01:19:24,740 - Have you ever seen a Sinatra in concert? - Uh-uh. 995 01:19:25,330 --> 01:19:27,450 What about Billie Holiday? 996 01:19:28,540 --> 01:19:30,200 How old do you think I am? 997 01:19:31,200 --> 01:19:33,330 Well, my favorite's Nat King Cole. 998 01:19:34,080 --> 01:19:35,580 You listen to Nat King Cole? 999 01:19:36,080 --> 01:19:39,290 My mommy used to play a lot of old records when I was little. 1000 01:19:39,580 --> 01:19:42,240 She used to sing to me a lot. You're still little. 1001 01:19:52,150 --> 01:19:52,780 What's wrong? 1002 01:19:56,820 --> 01:19:58,230 Just miss her, that's all. 1003 01:20:00,870 --> 01:20:02,120 Just unfair. 1004 01:20:03,070 --> 01:20:06,690 I mean how can someone die from lung cancer when they never even smoked. 1005 01:20:07,370 --> 01:20:08,200 I know what you mean. 1006 01:20:10,200 --> 01:20:10,910 How? 1007 01:20:19,500 --> 01:20:23,290 Um, I don't know. I don't, I guess. 1008 01:20:27,830 --> 01:20:29,240 Do you talk to your mom a lot? 1009 01:20:32,540 --> 01:20:36,120 - Every night. - Really? 1010 01:20:36,620 --> 01:20:38,120 Yeah, right before I go to sleep. 1011 01:20:43,000 --> 01:20:43,990 You're a good son. 1012 01:20:48,580 --> 01:20:52,290 Hey, Liam. Liam? 1013 01:20:54,270 --> 01:20:57,640 Liam, just sign this And then, you are all set! 1014 01:21:05,500 --> 01:21:06,240 I can't. 1015 01:21:13,040 --> 01:21:14,330 (Chinese) The thing is... 1016 01:21:14,660 --> 01:21:15,800 (Chinese) we don't want to sell now. 1017 01:21:16,080 --> 01:21:19,080 (Chinese) Not selling? 1018 01:21:19,290 --> 01:21:23,620 (Chinese) My cousin come from America. (Chinese) He thinks different than us. 1019 01:21:23,790 --> 01:21:31,540 - (Chinese) He may have plans for this house. - (Chinese) What are you saying? (Chinese) Not selling? 1020 01:21:34,660 --> 01:21:41,080 - (Chinese) Calm down ... calm down. - (Chinese) Calm down? You're not making any sense. 1021 01:21:41,500 --> 01:21:43,080 (Chinese) Let's go... 1022 01:21:43,700 --> 01:21:47,620 (Chinese) I can't believe this is happening ... 1023 01:21:48,870 --> 01:21:51,450 OK, this was fun. 1024 01:21:52,470 --> 01:21:58,510 - Call me the next time you want to do this. - Hey, can you help to transfer the deed to someone else? 1025 01:22:01,500 --> 01:22:03,160 I cannot accept this. 1026 01:22:03,410 --> 01:22:06,330 Geez, Louise. If you learn anything in life, 1027 01:22:06,500 --> 01:22:09,490 Learn that when someone gives you a house, you don't say, "I cannot accept this." 1028 01:22:09,660 --> 01:22:10,870 You say, "fuck yeah!" 1029 01:22:12,450 --> 01:22:13,450 - Yeah, try it. - Ok... 1030 01:22:15,800 --> 01:22:19,810 (Together) Fuck yeah! - ALright, we'll work on that 1031 01:22:21,070 --> 01:22:24,420 No one has ever done anything like this for me before. 1032 01:22:24,870 --> 01:22:27,870 All I know is if you marry Jai Lee, you're gonna regret it. 1033 01:22:28,120 --> 01:22:32,740 Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon, and for the rest of your life. 1034 01:22:34,870 --> 01:22:39,580 Oh, can you do me a favor? 1035 01:22:41,000 --> 01:22:42,790 Before you kicked me out of your house. 1036 01:22:43,830 --> 01:22:44,620 Anything. 1037 01:22:45,700 --> 01:22:50,330 Can you read one of these letters to me? Of course. 1038 01:22:55,910 --> 01:22:57,200 This is from your father. 1039 01:22:58,160 --> 01:22:59,450 My Xiaoyin, 1040 01:23:02,540 --> 01:23:05,120 I have missed you these past few months. 1041 01:23:05,950 --> 01:23:10,700 And I regret that I cannot be with you during this vulnerable time. 1042 01:23:12,040 --> 01:23:15,160 I hope that my mother is taking good care of you. 1043 01:23:15,910 --> 01:23:20,290 Because she is so excited to become a grandmother. 1044 01:23:22,620 --> 01:23:24,910 I am working hard in Suzhou 1045 01:23:26,450 --> 01:23:30,370 to save enough money for us to go to America. 1046 01:23:32,290 --> 01:23:35,620 I hope to make enough money 1047 01:23:37,150 --> 01:23:40,440 so that we can go before you give birth. 1048 01:23:43,500 --> 01:23:45,790 I want our son to be born there 1049 01:23:46,540 --> 01:23:50,330 so he can become the president of the United States one day. 1050 01:23:51,950 --> 01:23:55,370 Please know, you will always be with me. 1051 01:23:57,580 --> 01:23:58,240 Liu Yi 1052 01:24:04,070 --> 01:24:05,150 Wow. 1053 01:24:06,770 --> 01:24:08,200 Yeah, I'll say. 1054 01:24:10,850 --> 01:24:11,770 Thanks 1055 01:24:37,330 --> 01:24:38,080 Thank you. 1056 01:24:41,370 --> 01:24:42,790 Thank you for everything. 1057 01:25:39,580 --> 01:25:40,290 Dad? 1058 01:25:45,950 --> 01:25:46,700 Dad? 1059 01:25:55,290 --> 01:25:55,870 Dad? 1060 01:26:06,290 --> 01:26:08,330 Dad? Hey 1061 01:27:01,160 --> 01:27:04,950 I loved her. I Know. 1062 01:27:10,870 --> 01:27:11,910 I'm sorry. 1063 01:27:15,660 --> 01:27:20,200 - You forgive me? - You look skinny. 1064 01:27:21,790 --> 01:27:26,160 - I'll take you to lunch. - No, I'll take you to lunch. I have a job now. 1065 01:27:28,200 --> 01:27:31,160 I'm peddling cappuccinos at Starbucks. 1066 01:27:41,160 --> 01:27:45,740 Haha, my son. I cannot believe it. You work for The Man, huh? 1067 01:27:46,330 --> 01:27:49,870 Working for The Man. Like the kids want to say, huh? 1068 01:27:51,410 --> 01:27:55,040 - Nobody says that, dad. - Are you sure? 1069 01:27:55,370 --> 01:27:59,160 You've been away too long. A kid down the street, say it all the time. 1070 01:28:14,540 --> 01:28:16,120 Damn, I miss that taste. 1071 01:28:19,350 --> 01:28:22,600 How about this girl? Over there, the blonde. 1072 01:28:24,950 --> 01:28:28,620 Like a 7.6, 7.7? What do you think? 1073 01:28:29,750 --> 01:28:31,240 She's OK. OK? 1074 01:28:32,620 --> 01:28:33,910 You don't wanna play anymore? 1075 01:28:34,370 --> 01:28:39,200 Joe, did you ever think that assigning women a numerical value between 1 and 10, 1076 01:28:40,160 --> 01:28:45,170 based on artificial qualities, is kind of superficial? 1077 01:28:45,170 --> 01:28:47,670 Liam, if you don't think she's cute... just say you don't think she's cute. 1078 01:28:48,950 --> 01:28:50,330 You know what I think? 1079 01:28:51,580 --> 01:28:53,910 I made a big mistake with Addy. 1080 01:28:55,160 --> 01:29:00,620 You can come up with a list of hundreds of qualities that you think are important 1081 01:29:00,790 --> 01:29:04,790 in another person, but in the end, the heart wants what it wants. 1082 01:29:05,160 --> 01:29:07,120 You spend your entire life fighting that. 1083 01:29:07,580 --> 01:29:10,160 Oh, my God. You just, you just you go crazy. 1084 01:29:10,450 --> 01:29:13,740 Yeah, I'm, uh, sorta going crazy just listening to you. 1085 01:29:14,040 --> 01:29:14,950 Sorry. 1086 01:29:14,950 --> 01:29:20,490 So, you could ramble on about it with me for the rest of the day. 1087 01:29:22,410 --> 01:29:27,160 Or, or ... You could call her. 1088 01:29:28,660 --> 01:29:32,330 You know what, I'm not gonna call her. I'm gonna go over there. 1089 01:29:32,500 --> 01:29:34,620 - I got it. - Thanks. 1090 01:29:34,830 --> 01:29:35,990 How you're gonna get there? 1091 01:29:36,620 --> 01:29:40,790 - You've sold your car. - I'll walk, I'll walk, I'll run, I'll fly over there. 1092 01:29:42,200 --> 01:29:44,700 - Alright, I'll catch you later. - C'mon, nobody walks in LA 1093 01:29:47,700 --> 01:29:50,950 (Excuse me, I'm sorry.) (You see that guy over there...) 1094 01:30:05,020 --> 01:30:08,390 - Hi. - Hi. 1095 01:31:35,000 --> 01:31:37,540 - What're you doing here? - I came to see you. 1096 01:31:38,620 --> 01:31:42,910 And I know I'm probably the last person you want to see right now. 1097 01:31:43,080 --> 01:31:46,290 And I wouldn't blame you if you slam the door in my face. And I deserve it. 1098 01:31:47,620 --> 01:31:49,410 I get the door slammed. 1099 01:31:52,870 --> 01:31:54,040 Who is it, sweetie? 1100 01:31:55,500 --> 01:31:58,540 - Just, Chinese. - Great. 1101 01:32:00,450 --> 01:32:01,370 Go to Paris. 1102 01:32:02,500 --> 01:32:03,270 What? 1103 01:32:03,270 --> 01:32:05,020 I want you to go to Paris. I want you to see the world. 1104 01:32:05,320 --> 01:32:07,110 I want you to do what you're passionate about. 1105 01:32:07,950 --> 01:32:10,990 When I was in Shanghai I had a lot of time to think. 1106 01:32:11,870 --> 01:32:15,370 Nobody spoke English and the movies there suck. 1107 01:32:15,540 --> 01:32:18,990 But, I realized how badly I treated you. 1108 01:32:19,750 --> 01:32:22,540 I mean you have so much heart. You can sing to the world. 1109 01:32:22,540 --> 01:32:26,220 And I always made it seem like you needed me. You don't, you never did... 1110 01:32:27,250 --> 01:32:28,700 I'm the one who needed you. 1111 01:32:30,200 --> 01:32:31,290 And I was scared... 1112 01:32:32,120 --> 01:32:33,290 Scared of you growing up. 1113 01:32:33,450 --> 01:32:36,580 Scared of you wake up one morning and realizing that you didn't need me. 1114 01:32:36,750 --> 01:32:40,080 Scared of you going off to Paris... seeing the whole world out there without me. 1115 01:32:41,420 --> 01:32:46,760 But I'm not scared anymore. And I love enough to let you go. 1116 01:32:48,650 --> 01:32:54,280 I mean, you dumped me. And then you have this epiphany in Shanghai. 1117 01:32:54,540 --> 01:32:58,200 And now you're standing here, basically, giving me permission to live my life? 1118 01:33:00,410 --> 01:33:02,330 And by the way, news flash, 1119 01:33:04,850 --> 01:33:08,500 - I'm already going to Paris. - You are? 1120 01:33:09,800 --> 01:33:10,670 Next week. 1121 01:33:12,870 --> 01:33:15,330 Great. Perfect. 1122 01:33:15,950 --> 01:33:17,740 That's what I wanted to hear. 1123 01:33:21,020 --> 01:33:23,570 Um, you're gonna, you're gonna learn so much. 1124 01:33:23,570 --> 01:33:26,600 Your are gonna meet so many interesting people. 1125 01:33:27,250 --> 01:33:31,700 If you are running into Gerard Depardieu, tell him that I loved him in Green Card. 1126 01:33:35,080 --> 01:33:37,370 Why do you make it so hard for me to hate you? 1127 01:33:41,330 --> 01:33:45,950 God, I'm starving. So, do you need some cash, bunny? 1128 01:33:46,700 --> 01:33:49,450 - I'm gonna found out? - OK. 1129 01:33:50,400 --> 01:33:56,150 - So, where's the food? - I, uh, I left it, I left it at the restaurant. 1130 01:33:57,790 --> 01:34:02,790 So, is this goodbye? 1131 01:34:05,040 --> 01:34:07,790 More like, see you later. 1132 01:34:18,000 --> 01:34:19,040 I'll just... 1133 01:34:25,720 --> 01:34:26,800 That was weird. 1134 01:34:34,750 --> 01:34:37,370 - You read the copy? - Uh, yeah, sure. 1135 01:34:38,080 --> 01:34:39,540 Just start whenever you're ready then 1136 01:34:40,300 --> 01:34:41,130 OK. 1137 01:34:41,450 --> 01:34:42,620 Right into the camera. 1138 01:34:45,750 --> 01:34:47,410 Do you have genital herpes? 1139 01:34:49,290 --> 01:34:52,240 It's just... Lately... 1140 01:34:53,660 --> 01:34:57,700 I've been feeling itching and burning around in my genital area. 1141 01:34:59,250 --> 01:35:04,160 And how did this happen to me. I ask myself... 1142 01:35:05,320 --> 01:35:09,780 Was it that girl in Puerto Rico? I knew she wasn't a virgin. 1143 01:35:12,770 --> 01:35:17,190 But will I ever be able to love again? Will anyone love me? 1144 01:35:18,290 --> 01:35:23,580 Am I supposed to spend my entire life alone? Because of one drunken night? 1145 01:35:25,300 --> 01:35:28,510 This is what I felt... Before I tried Provium. 1146 01:35:29,120 --> 01:35:33,910 Provium daily suppressive therapy can help reduce the frequency of outbreaks. 1147 01:35:35,370 --> 01:35:40,080 Make the most out of your life. Ask your doctor if Provium is right for you. 1148 01:35:43,290 --> 01:35:45,830 Wow, that was amazing. 1149 01:35:46,660 --> 01:35:49,370 You know, I really believed you have genital herpes. 1150 01:35:51,790 --> 01:35:55,870 - Do you? - Uh, no. No, I don't. 1151 01:36:01,370 --> 01:36:04,040 Well, I don't think we need to see anyone else. 1152 01:36:43,080 --> 01:36:43,620 Sorry. 1153 01:36:51,950 --> 01:36:53,080 I'll miss you! 1154 01:37:16,750 --> 01:37:19,330 Go to Paris?! Stupid! 1155 01:37:39,120 --> 01:37:42,450 Goddamn it. So stupid. 1156 01:37:43,870 --> 01:37:44,660 Hey. 1157 01:37:47,410 --> 01:37:50,790 Either you came to see me or you ordered a mail-order bride. 1158 01:37:52,040 --> 01:37:53,330 I saw you with that guy. 1159 01:37:54,700 --> 01:37:57,370 He's one of my instructors, and he's as gay as a pineapple. 1160 01:37:59,660 --> 01:38:00,910 You still remember me? 1161 01:38:03,080 --> 01:38:05,040 Bunny, you're my every other memory. 1162 01:38:07,500 --> 01:38:10,370 - How'd you know I was coming in? - I called your dad. 1163 01:38:11,160 --> 01:38:14,200 God, you're like obsessed with me or something. 1164 01:38:14,200 --> 01:38:17,300 I'm more than obsessed I'm daffy about you. 1165 01:38:18,660 --> 01:38:22,620 - Daffy like a duck? - Daffy like a duck! 1166 01:38:28,700 --> 01:38:30,490 Uhhh.... oh! These are... these are for you. 1167 01:38:32,750 --> 01:38:33,830 Thanks. 1168 01:38:36,320 --> 01:38:37,690 So you think we have a chance? 1169 01:38:40,040 --> 01:38:43,870 Anything's possible. It's the beauty of living.89487