subtitlecat.com

All language subtitles for College.2008.720p.BrRip.x264.YIFY

Afrikaans

Akan

Albanian

Amharic

Arabic

Armenian

Azerbaijani

Basque

Belarusian

Bemba

Bengali

Bihari

Bosnian

Breton

Bulgarian

Cambodian

Catalan

Cebuano

Cherokee

Chichewa

Chinese (Simplified)

Chinese (Traditional)

Corsican

Croatian

Czech

Danish

Dutch Download

English

Esperanto

Estonian

Ewe

Faroese

Filipino

Finnish

French

Frisian

Galician

Georgian

German

Greek

Guarani

Gujarati

Haitian Creole

Hausa

Hawaiian

Hebrew

Hindi

Hmong

Hungarian

Icelandic

Igbo

Indonesian Download

Interlingua

Irish

Italian

Japanese

Javanese

Kannada

Kazakh

Kinyarwanda

Kirundi

Kongo

Korean

Krio (Sierra Leone)

Kurdish

Kurdish (Soranî)

Kyrgyz

Laothian

Latin

Latvian

Lingala

Lithuanian

Lozi

Luganda

Luo

Luxembourgish

Macedonian

Malagasy

Malay Download

Malayalam

Maltese

Maori

Marathi

Mauritian Creole

Moldavian

Mongolian

Myanmar (Burmese)

Montenegrin

Nepali

Nigerian Pidgin

Northern Sotho

Norwegian

Norwegian (Nynorsk)

Occitan

Oriya

Oromo

Pashto

Persian

Polish

Portuguese (Brazil)

Portuguese (Portugal)

Punjabi

Quechua

Romanian

Romansh

Runyakitara

Russian

Samoan

Scots Gaelic

Serbian

Serbo-Croatian

Sesotho

Setswana

Seychellois Creole

Shona

Sindhi

Sinhalese Download

Slovak

Slovenian

Somali

Spanish Download

Spanish (Latin American)

Sundanese

Swahili

Swedish

Tajik

Tamil

Tatar

Telugu

Thai

Tigrinya

Tonga

Tshiluba

Tumbuka

Turkish

Turkmen

Twi

Uighur

Ukrainian

Urdu

Uzbek

Vietnamese

Welsh

Wolof

Xhosa

Yiddish

Yoruba

Zulu

Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:15,000 Created and Encoded by -- Bokutox -- of www.YIFY-TORRENTS.com. The Best 720p/1080p/3d movies with the lowest file size on the internet. 2 00:00:44,487 --> 00:00:48,110 MAN: (SINGING) I'm just a penny on the train track 3 00:00:48,111 --> 00:00:50,694 Waiting for my judgment day 4 00:00:51,235 --> 00:00:54,443 Come on, baby girl, let me see those legs 5 00:00:54,568 --> 00:00:57,233 Before I get flattened away 6 00:00:57,692 --> 00:00:59,442 I wait 7 00:01:01,107 --> 00:01:03,065 Yeah, I wait 8 00:01:04,481 --> 00:01:09,272 For something good, for something great 9 00:01:11,521 --> 00:01:14,729 Stopping in somebody's old home town 10 00:01:14,812 --> 00:01:17,894 Gotta get that midnight meal 11 00:01:18,269 --> 00:01:21,518 If you can't get behind your own life 12 00:01:21,601 --> 00:01:24,517 Get behind the driving wheel 13 00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:29,598 And go, just go 14 00:01:32,098 --> 00:01:36,264 Find a place that you don't know 15 00:01:38,846 --> 00:01:41,762 Ran into a friend just the other night 16 00:01:41,887 --> 00:01:44,386 Got a badge, he's a local cop 17 00:01:45,386 --> 00:01:48,427 Haven't seen that boy in over seven years 18 00:01:48,552 --> 00:01:51,426 Since out of high school I dropped 19 00:01:51,509 --> 00:01:57,133 I see, I see 20 00:01:59,090 --> 00:02:03,839 All the things that I should be 21 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:26,416 (ALARM CLOCK BEEPING) 22 00:02:26,499 --> 00:02:28,707 I wait 23 00:02:28,832 --> 00:02:30,290 Yeah, I wait 24 00:02:32,247 --> 00:02:36,870 For something good, for something great 25 00:02:39,744 --> 00:02:41,452 Dude! You're totally missing it! 26 00:02:41,744 --> 00:02:45,077 It's fucking crazy here, man! Dude! Kev. 27 00:02:45,201 --> 00:02:47,410 I've got an idea. I want you to drop what you are doing. 28 00:02:47,534 --> 00:02:52,033 I want you to come down here and take a picture of this for the paper! 29 00:02:52,116 --> 00:02:55,907 (LAUGHING) Now that, my friend, is front page material. Lateski. 30 00:03:01,446 --> 00:03:03,154 Hey, Mom! Gina, Morris and I are gonna leave 31 00:03:03,238 --> 00:03:05,071 for Fieldmont right after school today. 32 00:03:05,154 --> 00:03:08,361 Honey, I completely forgot about that. Can you do it next weekend? 33 00:03:08,444 --> 00:03:12,151 Derek was gonna take me into the city tomorrow night for dinner. 34 00:03:12,235 --> 00:03:14,360 - God! It's already 7:00? - KEVIN: We can't. 35 00:03:14,442 --> 00:03:17,025 Morris has a scholarship meeting and we're signed up for the campus tour. 36 00:03:17,109 --> 00:03:19,400 - Carter. - Hi. What's up Ms. B? 37 00:03:21,191 --> 00:03:25,439 Dude, she totally threw off my groove! I was almost at the top level. 38 00:03:26,064 --> 00:03:27,314 - Hey, Carter. - What's up, man? 39 00:03:27,398 --> 00:03:29,438 What's up, little people? 40 00:03:31,980 --> 00:03:33,396 Running a little bit low. 41 00:03:33,479 --> 00:03:35,353 Kev! Can I ask you a question? 42 00:03:35,436 --> 00:03:38,477 You know that book that Miss Dangle makes everybody read about the mice? 43 00:03:38,561 --> 00:03:41,726 - You mean Of Mice and Men? - Bingo! That's the one, yeah. 44 00:03:41,852 --> 00:03:43,309 So let me get this straight. 45 00:03:43,393 --> 00:03:47,808 These two dudes dream of buying a farm together to raise rabbits? 46 00:03:48,558 --> 00:03:50,015 Hmm. 47 00:03:50,099 --> 00:03:53,723 And I'm no expert, but doesn't that seem a little... 48 00:03:53,848 --> 00:03:57,847 I don't know. Kind of G-A-Y? 49 00:03:58,264 --> 00:03:59,721 Dude, I think you're kind of missing the point. 50 00:03:59,805 --> 00:04:02,720 - We can spell, Carter. - Yeah, dumb A-S-S. 51 00:04:03,679 --> 00:04:05,469 Dude. Satan's children, I swear. Spawn of Satan. 52 00:04:05,553 --> 00:04:06,885 (CAR HORN HONKING) 53 00:04:09,968 --> 00:04:13,384 Right. Come on, guys! Mrs. Seavers is here. Let's go! 54 00:04:14,716 --> 00:04:16,591 Grab your backpacks. 55 00:04:24,297 --> 00:04:25,256 Oh, yeah! 56 00:04:25,380 --> 00:04:26,713 All right, see you guys! 57 00:04:32,003 --> 00:04:34,002 (SCHOOL BELL RINGING) 58 00:04:36,377 --> 00:04:39,376 Would you look at this guy? Why do we have to hang out with him? 59 00:04:39,459 --> 00:04:40,834 - Hey, Morris. - Hey, guys. 60 00:04:40,917 --> 00:04:43,500 Hey, Morris, what's up with all the geek books? 61 00:04:43,625 --> 00:04:45,499 I've got a scholarship interview in a day, Carter. 62 00:04:45,582 --> 00:04:47,666 And my parents are up my ass about it. 63 00:04:47,790 --> 00:04:49,832 Morris, your parents are always up your ass. 64 00:04:49,957 --> 00:04:52,580 Besides, don't you want to go to some fancy-shmancy Ivy League school? 65 00:04:52,705 --> 00:04:54,663 Guys, come on! Do we really have to start this early? 66 00:04:54,746 --> 00:04:56,496 Well, apparently, it's not my choice, Carter. 67 00:04:56,621 --> 00:04:58,495 At least Kevin will be there. Right, Kev? 68 00:04:58,578 --> 00:05:01,370 Yep. Hey, did you grab your stuff so we can split right after school today? 69 00:05:01,453 --> 00:05:03,244 Yeah. It's in my... 70 00:05:10,575 --> 00:05:13,866 Yeah, the technique was a little off, but the timing was better. 71 00:05:13,949 --> 00:05:15,199 And by the way, she's easy, 72 00:05:15,324 --> 00:05:19,156 but not in the, like, I'm-gonna-fuck-Morris kind of way easy. 73 00:05:19,989 --> 00:05:21,406 Come on, Kev, I've got to pee. I need you to shake it. 74 00:05:21,531 --> 00:05:22,613 Carter. 75 00:05:27,028 --> 00:05:29,112 You sure you don't wanna come with us this weekend, man? 76 00:05:29,195 --> 00:05:31,319 What? There's no reason for him to come. 77 00:05:31,444 --> 00:05:35,651 You know what, Morris? I think, for the first time, you and I are on the same page. 78 00:05:35,776 --> 00:05:38,067 I don't know. Campus tours and scholarship interviews, 79 00:05:38,192 --> 00:05:39,650 sounds like a real blastie-blast. 80 00:05:39,733 --> 00:05:42,983 But I think I'd rather sock myself in the nuts. 81 00:05:43,066 --> 00:05:44,357 I mean, seriously, look at this thing. 82 00:05:44,440 --> 00:05:47,356 Like, where are all the hotties, you know? Show some skin. 83 00:05:47,439 --> 00:05:48,855 - Hey. - Hey! 84 00:05:49,939 --> 00:05:51,854 - Hey, Gina. - Hey, Gina. 85 00:05:52,479 --> 00:05:55,312 Kevin, really, just... Listen, don't take this the wrong way. 86 00:05:55,396 --> 00:05:58,436 But I need to talk to your friend outside, alone. 87 00:05:58,520 --> 00:06:00,185 (LAUGHS) Nice! Does that mean you're gonna 88 00:06:00,310 --> 00:06:02,810 blow him underneath the bleachers? 89 00:06:04,559 --> 00:06:06,184 Yeah. That's exactly what I'm gonna do. 90 00:06:06,309 --> 00:06:08,975 Awesome! You kids have fun! High five! 91 00:06:12,307 --> 00:06:13,431 I got my high five, dude. 92 00:06:13,515 --> 00:06:14,931 Does he give you a high five like that? 93 00:06:15,014 --> 00:06:16,514 See you... 94 00:06:16,639 --> 00:06:18,888 Here's your brochure, though. Have a good weekend. 95 00:06:20,513 --> 00:06:21,887 Miami? 96 00:06:23,263 --> 00:06:26,469 - When did you apply there? - A couple months ago. 97 00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:28,135 KEVIN: What about us? 98 00:06:28,261 --> 00:06:29,927 I mean, what about our plans to go to Fieldmont together? 99 00:06:30,010 --> 00:06:32,301 And the campus tour this weekend? 100 00:06:32,385 --> 00:06:34,217 Just go without me. 101 00:06:35,509 --> 00:06:39,216 Look, it's senior year. 102 00:06:40,340 --> 00:06:45,130 It's, like, so exciting, and I wanna party, and I wanna have fun. 103 00:06:45,214 --> 00:06:49,004 And you're, like, not fun. 104 00:06:51,462 --> 00:06:55,419 Like, so what? So I don't drink very much, you know. We still have fun. 105 00:06:55,503 --> 00:06:57,293 Like our Friday nights at mini golf. 106 00:06:57,377 --> 00:06:58,710 Yeah, they're kind of boring. 107 00:06:58,834 --> 00:07:01,459 Our camping trips, the school carnival, studying together? 108 00:07:01,584 --> 00:07:04,625 Standing around while you're taking pictures of everything? 109 00:07:04,750 --> 00:07:06,666 - Thrilling! - Gina... 110 00:07:06,791 --> 00:07:08,165 When we were freshmen, it was one thing. 111 00:07:08,249 --> 00:07:12,747 But this is our time to really go crazy! We're supposed to be partying. 112 00:07:12,830 --> 00:07:15,996 And you, you're just... You're a loser! 113 00:07:18,704 --> 00:07:20,411 Kevin, it's over. 114 00:07:20,912 --> 00:07:25,619 College is just around the corner, and I can't let you ruin my senior year. 115 00:07:28,201 --> 00:07:29,700 That's mine. 116 00:07:30,284 --> 00:07:32,492 CARTER: Okay, so let me get this straight. 117 00:07:32,908 --> 00:07:36,366 You didn't get blown under the bleachers? 118 00:07:36,491 --> 00:07:39,989 No! Dude, have you been listening to me? She dumped me! 119 00:07:40,114 --> 00:07:42,113 I was dumped once. 120 00:07:42,197 --> 00:07:44,072 Morris, you're such a fucking liar, dude. 121 00:07:44,155 --> 00:07:46,946 - You've never even had a girlfriend. - Shut up, Carter. Yes, I did. 122 00:07:47,071 --> 00:07:48,986 Remember, Kev? You introduced me to her. 123 00:07:49,070 --> 00:07:50,237 - Right. - MORRIS: She was real. 124 00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:53,902 - We went to physics camp together. - Maybe more like fantasy camp. 125 00:07:53,985 --> 00:07:56,360 Come on, you guys. Do you mind? I'm having a breakdown here. 126 00:07:56,485 --> 00:07:57,818 What am I supposed to do now? 127 00:07:57,901 --> 00:08:00,234 It was all set. First, we'd go to college together, 128 00:08:00,317 --> 00:08:03,565 and then we'd get married, have a couple kids, one girl, one boy. 129 00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:07,190 Dude, is that the kind of shit you would say to Gina? 130 00:08:07,315 --> 00:08:10,272 God! No wonder she dumped your ass. You're fucking lame. 131 00:08:10,939 --> 00:08:13,687 - What's up, fellows? - What's up, Fletcher? 132 00:08:14,729 --> 00:08:15,895 What's up with Negative Nancy over here? 133 00:08:15,978 --> 00:08:17,853 Gina dumped him. He's having a breakdown. 134 00:08:17,978 --> 00:08:21,811 Cool. So are you guys going on some sort of road trip to Fieldmont this weekend? 135 00:08:21,936 --> 00:08:24,227 - I don't think I'm going anymore. - That's too bad. 136 00:08:24,309 --> 00:08:26,850 I just went there last weekend to visit my bro. 137 00:08:26,975 --> 00:08:28,017 I almost didn't make it back. 138 00:08:28,142 --> 00:08:30,891 "Almost didn't make it back"? Dude, it's just college. 139 00:08:30,974 --> 00:08:33,224 Yeah, yeah, just college. Yeah, see, that's what I thought, too. 140 00:08:33,307 --> 00:08:35,765 And then I went, and I'm telling you guys right now, 141 00:08:35,848 --> 00:08:39,180 it is fucking nuts, man. It's retarded. 142 00:08:39,888 --> 00:08:41,805 Why? What happened? 143 00:08:41,888 --> 00:08:43,929 You guys want to know? 144 00:08:44,845 --> 00:08:46,886 Basically, this is how it went down. 145 00:08:46,969 --> 00:08:48,552 I didn't sleep for three days, okay? 146 00:08:48,636 --> 00:08:50,010 I don't have any money left in my bank account. 147 00:08:50,135 --> 00:08:51,260 I maxed out my parents' credit card, 148 00:08:51,384 --> 00:08:53,426 which was only supposed to be used in case of an emergency. 149 00:08:53,510 --> 00:08:55,592 I lost my cell phone, which is actually my dad's cell phone. 150 00:08:55,675 --> 00:08:57,300 So he's pissed about that and the credit card. 151 00:08:57,425 --> 00:09:00,548 I tried smoking a tampon, which I thought was a big fat joint. 152 00:09:00,632 --> 00:09:03,381 Still got high. Stole a car, got in a bar fight, ate some goldfish. 153 00:09:03,465 --> 00:09:06,005 Played naked Frisbee, did some whip-its, wet my brother's bed twice. 154 00:09:06,130 --> 00:09:07,089 Shit my pants, once, 155 00:09:07,214 --> 00:09:09,796 but please don't tell anyone, 'cause I'm kind of embarrassed about that. 156 00:09:09,921 --> 00:09:13,628 Saw two girls make out. With tongue! With tongue! 157 00:09:13,795 --> 00:09:16,044 Watched my brother's roommates eat as many cheeseburgers as they could 158 00:09:16,127 --> 00:09:17,127 until one of them puked. 159 00:09:17,252 --> 00:09:19,126 Found a tattoo on my lower back of a unicorn. 160 00:09:19,851 --> 00:09:20,851 Don't remember getting that. 161 00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:22,892 Figure I'll just tell people it's some sort of killer unicorn. 162 00:09:23,017 --> 00:09:24,184 You know? So it doesn't seem so gay. 163 00:09:24,308 --> 00:09:26,849 I laughed. I cried. Fell in love. 164 00:09:27,599 --> 00:09:30,890 Yeah, and did I mention earlier that I got laid? 165 00:09:31,015 --> 00:09:33,847 Three times. Different girls, yeah. 166 00:09:33,931 --> 00:09:38,013 So all in all, I'd say it was pretty much the best weekend of my fucking life. 167 00:09:38,137 --> 00:09:39,304 Yeah. 168 00:09:40,137 --> 00:09:42,011 Dude, you should go. 169 00:09:44,386 --> 00:09:47,635 What if I could have a weekend like that, a weekend like Fletcher's? 170 00:09:47,718 --> 00:09:51,134 How? No way. Who knows if he's even telling the truth? 171 00:09:51,259 --> 00:09:53,342 Come on, man. What if he was? You heard him. 172 00:09:53,425 --> 00:09:58,298 All the craziness, the partying, the sex, the drinking, it sounds incredible. 173 00:09:59,507 --> 00:10:01,506 You know, maybe I'll even get a tattoo. 174 00:10:01,589 --> 00:10:04,338 Wait, you're joking, right? 175 00:10:04,672 --> 00:10:09,295 You got me, Kev. That's a good one. Partying, drinking, sex. Up top. 176 00:10:09,379 --> 00:10:13,336 I'm not kidding, Morris. You know, maybe Gina's right, I'm no fun. 177 00:10:13,461 --> 00:10:15,794 A weekend like Fletcher's is exactly what I need. 178 00:10:15,877 --> 00:10:19,792 Kev, having some crazy weekend to get back at Gina is a really bad idea. 179 00:10:19,875 --> 00:10:22,874 Or a really good idea, and I say go for it. 180 00:10:26,207 --> 00:10:27,415 Bitch. 181 00:10:28,289 --> 00:10:29,289 You know what? I'm gonna go for it. 182 00:10:29,373 --> 00:10:31,248 In fact, I'm gonna have a better weekend than Fletcher. 183 00:10:31,372 --> 00:10:32,497 Yes! 184 00:10:32,622 --> 00:10:34,038 (LAUGHS MOCKINGLY) 185 00:10:34,121 --> 00:10:35,163 (BLOWING RASPBERRY) 186 00:10:35,287 --> 00:10:36,496 Dude, I am so going. 187 00:10:37,037 --> 00:10:39,869 MAN: (SINGING) I gotta move 188 00:10:39,953 --> 00:10:44,035 While the streets ahead are sunny 189 00:10:44,160 --> 00:10:49,367 Fall in love with some honey Oh, mama 190 00:10:49,784 --> 00:10:53,199 I gotta move 191 00:10:55,281 --> 00:10:59,905 It's time I broke out into the open 192 00:11:00,030 --> 00:11:02,780 You know I'll settle down again some day 193 00:11:02,863 --> 00:11:05,362 Dude, this is definitely better than the brochure! 194 00:11:05,445 --> 00:11:07,237 KEVIN: Yeah, man, I've got a good feeling about this. 195 00:11:07,362 --> 00:11:08,444 Good feeling? What kind of good feeling? 196 00:11:08,528 --> 00:11:10,361 Like your-boy-Carter's-gonna-get-laid kind of feeling? 197 00:11:10,486 --> 00:11:12,902 'Cause I have that feeling too, and I love it! 198 00:11:13,026 --> 00:11:15,442 I don't know, man, just everything. I'm ready to have fun. 199 00:11:15,526 --> 00:11:18,067 Yeah, man, good! Positive vibes. Positive vibes. 200 00:11:18,192 --> 00:11:22,607 Okay, Kev, it says here that the campus tour is at 12:30 tomorrow afternoon. 201 00:11:22,690 --> 00:11:26,773 And there's a pre-frosh reception tonight before dinner in the main... 202 00:11:26,855 --> 00:11:29,271 Okay, that's enough! That is enough. No more. 203 00:11:29,355 --> 00:11:30,396 That's our schedule for the weekend! 204 00:11:30,522 --> 00:11:33,978 Dude, Morris, fuck schedules, man! We're in college now. 205 00:11:34,062 --> 00:11:35,853 You know what that means? 206 00:11:35,978 --> 00:11:39,685 No parents! No curfew! Free fucking beer! 207 00:11:39,811 --> 00:11:42,684 It does not get any better than this! 208 00:11:43,601 --> 00:11:46,475 Except for that. Dude, slow down, slow down. 209 00:11:46,558 --> 00:11:48,641 Hey, what's up, ladies? You on your way to class? 210 00:11:48,724 --> 00:11:51,140 No. We just like carrying all these books around for fun. 211 00:11:51,224 --> 00:11:55,181 (LAUGHING) Right! A girl's got to read, huh? Awesome. 212 00:11:55,264 --> 00:11:58,180 So, look, we're in town for the weekend, and we were just kind of wondering 213 00:11:58,305 --> 00:12:00,596 if you guys could, I mean, I don't know, show us around? 214 00:12:00,679 --> 00:12:03,012 New guys, huh? What college are you visiting from? 215 00:12:03,095 --> 00:12:05,511 No, no, see, we're not in college. 216 00:12:05,636 --> 00:12:09,052 - We're actually still in high school. - CARTER: What the fuck? 217 00:12:09,177 --> 00:12:10,301 - I hate you so much! - Stop it! 218 00:12:10,426 --> 00:12:11,967 You're crushing my testicles! 219 00:12:12,051 --> 00:12:14,592 - What my friend meant to say was... - Fuck off! 220 00:12:14,674 --> 00:12:17,466 All righty then. I'll see you guys later. 221 00:12:17,549 --> 00:12:20,798 Hey, green shirt, if I give you $5 right now, 222 00:12:20,923 --> 00:12:23,631 would you fart in a can and let me just keep it in my bedroom? 223 00:12:23,756 --> 00:12:25,505 I'll never open it! I promise. 224 00:12:28,712 --> 00:12:31,669 These dorms are whack. Why do we have to stay here? 225 00:12:31,795 --> 00:12:33,087 You don't have to, Carter. 226 00:12:33,169 --> 00:12:36,169 This is where the admissions board put me and Kevin. 227 00:12:36,251 --> 00:12:39,251 Look, I got a cousin who's a legacy in one of the fraternities. 228 00:12:39,334 --> 00:12:41,250 I'm sure if we go there, they'll hook us up. 229 00:12:41,334 --> 00:12:44,208 - Yeah, my parents would love that. - Yeah. 230 00:12:44,333 --> 00:12:48,539 Enough, you guys! Look, I don't see what's so bad about this, Carter. 231 00:12:49,248 --> 00:12:50,456 (MAN MOANING) 232 00:12:51,830 --> 00:12:53,413 (WHIPPING ON TV) 233 00:12:55,662 --> 00:12:56,996 - What? - ALL: God! 234 00:12:58,329 --> 00:12:59,411 (WOMAN MOANING ON TV) 235 00:12:59,495 --> 00:13:01,036 - Hi. - Hey, there. 236 00:13:01,161 --> 00:13:02,286 I'm Morris. 237 00:13:03,161 --> 00:13:06,326 I'm Kevin, Kevin Brewer, prospective freshman. 238 00:13:06,451 --> 00:13:08,950 We're supposed to be staying in your room this weekend. 239 00:13:09,034 --> 00:13:10,492 Right. 240 00:13:11,949 --> 00:13:15,823 Look, fellows, I'm gonna need about 20, 30 minutes to finish up here, okay? 241 00:13:15,907 --> 00:13:18,073 So just come back later. 242 00:13:22,488 --> 00:13:23,738 Probably just working out. 243 00:13:23,821 --> 00:13:26,695 Yeah, he's just working out one of these. 244 00:13:30,444 --> 00:13:32,235 - Disgusting! - How's that frat house sound, guys? 245 00:13:32,319 --> 00:13:33,443 Pretty good? Awesome. 246 00:13:39,900 --> 00:13:41,566 KEVIN: Okay, dude, do you actually know where you're going? 247 00:13:41,650 --> 00:13:44,732 Dude, relax! It's right up here, I think. 248 00:13:45,440 --> 00:13:46,689 All right, dude, I'm not perfect, all right? 249 00:13:46,814 --> 00:13:48,439 All these Greek letters look the same to me. 250 00:13:48,564 --> 00:13:50,147 Maybe we should go back and try the dorm again. 251 00:13:50,271 --> 00:13:52,771 You shut your mouth! Shut your mouth! 252 00:13:52,896 --> 00:13:54,103 Or not. That's cool, too. 253 00:13:59,644 --> 00:14:04,225 Holy shit. Those chicks definitely weren't in the brochure. 254 00:14:04,309 --> 00:14:05,934 - Hey, guys. - Hey. 255 00:14:06,808 --> 00:14:08,891 - What's up, college girls? - Ladies. 256 00:14:08,974 --> 00:14:11,599 - I'm Morris. - Hi, Morris. 257 00:14:12,307 --> 00:14:16,139 - She said my name. - Chicks are smoking hot! Yeah. 258 00:14:18,305 --> 00:14:21,887 "Chicks are smoking hot"? Come on, real smooth, Carter. 259 00:14:24,386 --> 00:14:25,802 Yeah. Smooth. 260 00:14:25,886 --> 00:14:27,427 Whatever! All you got out was your name. 261 00:14:27,552 --> 00:14:29,093 Which she repeated back to me, I'd like to note. 262 00:14:29,218 --> 00:14:30,177 Shut up. 263 00:14:34,342 --> 00:14:35,300 (PELLET GUN FIRES) 264 00:14:35,425 --> 00:14:36,425 Jesus! 265 00:14:36,507 --> 00:14:38,674 - Nut shot. - Ten points! 266 00:14:38,798 --> 00:14:40,090 Get some. 267 00:14:40,590 --> 00:14:42,465 Shitty news, dudes. 268 00:14:43,464 --> 00:14:47,254 Dean Chandler has denied our petition, and we're still on probation. 269 00:14:47,338 --> 00:14:48,504 Shit! 270 00:14:48,962 --> 00:14:52,587 I guess he's taking that whole singing thing pretty seriously. 271 00:14:52,711 --> 00:14:54,544 Looking good, Goose. 272 00:14:54,628 --> 00:14:58,043 Looks like we got another semester without any pledges. 273 00:14:58,126 --> 00:15:00,001 This fucking blows, man! 274 00:15:00,126 --> 00:15:03,625 What's the point of college if you can't have pledges? 275 00:15:03,750 --> 00:15:04,917 Shit! 276 00:15:06,299 --> 00:15:07,299 (PELLET GUN FIRING) 277 00:15:07,424 --> 00:15:08,590 Fuck! 278 00:15:10,340 --> 00:15:11,464 MAN: Fuck! 279 00:15:14,005 --> 00:15:15,463 Son of a... 280 00:15:18,587 --> 00:15:21,003 That's it. This just might be the year to graduate. 281 00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:22,212 - What? - What? 282 00:15:22,294 --> 00:15:24,127 - No. - Yeah, I didn't think it'd come so soon. 283 00:15:24,252 --> 00:15:26,876 You can't graduate. You're Bearcat. 284 00:15:27,001 --> 00:15:28,959 - You're an institution. - I know. 285 00:15:29,084 --> 00:15:31,042 I'm scared to graduate. 286 00:15:31,167 --> 00:15:34,374 It seems like torturing pledges, that's all I'm good at. 287 00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,749 That's not true, and you know that. 288 00:15:36,873 --> 00:15:41,122 You're good at a lot of things. Cooper, tell him what he's good at. 289 00:15:42,247 --> 00:15:45,996 Like... Like the keg toss. 290 00:15:47,245 --> 00:15:49,203 And you take the biggest dumps in the house. Right? 291 00:15:49,286 --> 00:15:53,036 Yeah. Nobody beats you at that. It's like a real gift. 292 00:15:53,118 --> 00:15:56,659 It is, isn't it? Thanks, guys. I feel a lot better. 293 00:15:57,576 --> 00:15:59,700 - Hang in there, big guy. - You're all right. 294 00:15:59,825 --> 00:16:01,366 Hang in there. 295 00:16:05,823 --> 00:16:09,198 We'll figure this whole pledge thing out, I promise. 296 00:16:21,693 --> 00:16:24,359 Hey, man, is this the Beta Phi house? 297 00:16:24,485 --> 00:16:26,692 What? You can't read Greek? 298 00:16:26,817 --> 00:16:28,858 My cousin is a legacy here. 299 00:16:28,941 --> 00:16:31,274 - Yeah? Who's your cousin? - Toby Scott. 300 00:16:31,399 --> 00:16:32,940 You mean Queef? 301 00:16:34,398 --> 00:16:35,981 - What? - Queef. 302 00:16:36,814 --> 00:16:39,230 - What's a queef? - A pussy fart. 303 00:16:39,980 --> 00:16:41,563 It's his pledge name. 304 00:16:41,687 --> 00:16:44,187 - Who'd want that name? - Yeah, he earned it. 305 00:16:44,312 --> 00:16:49,102 I'd like to help you guys out, with you being his cousin and everything, but... 306 00:16:50,685 --> 00:16:51,851 Hey! Wait, wait, wait, wait! 307 00:16:51,934 --> 00:16:54,517 Come on, man. Look, we're in high school, you know? 308 00:16:54,642 --> 00:16:57,683 We're just up here to party, you know? Is that too much to ask? 309 00:16:57,767 --> 00:17:01,182 You guys are a bunch of high school kids? Yeah, yeah, yeah. 310 00:17:01,265 --> 00:17:03,473 No, okay? Go try the dorms. 311 00:17:07,014 --> 00:17:09,512 - A legacy, dude? - Yeah, he's... I... 312 00:17:09,637 --> 00:17:12,678 I can't believe they call Toby "Queef." Toby kicks ass. 313 00:17:15,719 --> 00:17:16,844 What did those guys want? 314 00:17:16,927 --> 00:17:21,176 A couple of high school kids looking to crash here for the weekend. 315 00:17:21,717 --> 00:17:24,133 One of them was Queef's cousin. Remember him? 316 00:17:24,216 --> 00:17:28,424 God, that guy could toss a salad. That thing he did with his tongue? 317 00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:31,590 Sorry. That guy's a loser. 318 00:17:31,715 --> 00:17:34,838 So, they're looking for a place to crash, huh? 319 00:17:36,921 --> 00:17:39,545 - Maybe we should let them stay. - COOPER: What, are you serious? 320 00:17:39,670 --> 00:17:40,670 What the hell are we gonna do with a bunch 321 00:17:40,795 --> 00:17:43,711 of fucking high school kids here all weekend? 322 00:17:46,460 --> 00:17:48,792 TEAGUE: Brothers. MAN: Do it, man! 323 00:17:49,293 --> 00:17:51,292 - Listen up. - Boner. 324 00:17:51,375 --> 00:17:53,458 Goose, shut the fuck up. 325 00:17:54,124 --> 00:17:55,291 (MEN LAUGHING) 326 00:17:56,041 --> 00:17:58,373 These guys. What's your names? 327 00:17:58,956 --> 00:18:00,789 I'm Kevin, and this is Morris and Carter. 328 00:18:00,873 --> 00:18:03,496 Okay, whatever. These guys are our guests for the weekend. 329 00:18:03,622 --> 00:18:04,830 (ALL CHEERING) 330 00:18:04,954 --> 00:18:07,829 Well, see, technically, we're supposed to stay in the dorms, 331 00:18:07,913 --> 00:18:09,953 but our roommate's a little... 332 00:18:10,037 --> 00:18:11,328 - MAN: Technically, you're a fag! ...preoccupied. 333 00:18:11,411 --> 00:18:12,869 Yeah, he's jerking off. 334 00:18:12,952 --> 00:18:15,660 Pussy! Fuck hole! Did we say you could talk? 335 00:18:15,784 --> 00:18:19,575 Bearcat! Relax, big man. They didn't mean anything by it. 336 00:18:21,491 --> 00:18:24,365 Sorry. He's got anger management issues. 337 00:18:24,449 --> 00:18:26,365 How about I show you guys where you are staying? 338 00:18:26,489 --> 00:18:27,865 Put your stuff away? 339 00:18:27,948 --> 00:18:29,655 - Morris, do you like the sound of that? - MAN: Party! 340 00:18:29,780 --> 00:18:31,988 - ALL: Party! Party! Party! - Party! Party! Party! 341 00:18:32,071 --> 00:18:34,155 - Party! Party! Party! - Party! Party! Party! 342 00:18:34,237 --> 00:18:36,279 - Party! Party! Party! - Party! Party! Party! 343 00:18:36,362 --> 00:18:38,153 - Party! Party! Party! - Party! Party! Party! 344 00:18:39,111 --> 00:18:40,236 What's up, shit face? 345 00:18:40,360 --> 00:18:43,193 This is usually where we let our pledges stay. 346 00:18:43,319 --> 00:18:48,317 We call this room the dungeon, but don't let the name scare you. 347 00:18:49,858 --> 00:18:51,733 You're gonna love it. 348 00:18:55,690 --> 00:18:56,981 (CRASHING) 349 00:18:57,355 --> 00:18:58,938 COOPER: Watch the step. 350 00:19:16,058 --> 00:19:18,183 Yeah, this place fucking sucks. 351 00:19:18,308 --> 00:19:20,640 Dude, it beats some guy jerking, all right? 352 00:19:20,724 --> 00:19:24,056 Like we said, all of our guest rooms are taken tonight. 353 00:19:24,182 --> 00:19:27,264 Yeah. We feel really bad about having to put you guys down here. 354 00:19:27,347 --> 00:19:30,888 - Is that a rat? - A rat? No. Probably just a shadow. 355 00:19:31,013 --> 00:19:32,596 And don't you guys worry. 356 00:19:32,679 --> 00:19:35,595 We're gonna give you the 411 on all the great parties this weekend. 357 00:19:35,678 --> 00:19:40,093 In fact, I think that the Lambdas are having a kegger tonight. 358 00:19:40,177 --> 00:19:42,676 Keggers? We love keggers. Right, Kev? Keggers, keggers! 359 00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:44,176 We are all about keggers. 360 00:19:44,301 --> 00:19:47,591 Cool. Well, you guys are gonna love the Lambdas. 361 00:19:53,423 --> 00:19:54,714 COOPER: Bearcat! 362 00:19:57,172 --> 00:19:59,129 - What the fuck is up with that... - BEARCAT: Are you talking? 363 00:19:59,254 --> 00:20:02,795 - No, man. I'm chilling. What? - Yeah. Shut the fuck up. 364 00:20:07,169 --> 00:20:08,626 So excited! 365 00:20:08,710 --> 00:20:12,375 All right, guys. This is it. Party time. 366 00:20:13,167 --> 00:20:15,374 Let's do the rundown. Rubbers? 367 00:20:16,499 --> 00:20:17,665 Check. 368 00:20:17,790 --> 00:20:19,457 Breath mints? 369 00:20:22,955 --> 00:20:24,247 Check. 370 00:20:24,330 --> 00:20:25,705 Retainers? 371 00:20:26,663 --> 00:20:27,829 (GROANS) 372 00:20:29,120 --> 00:20:32,619 I was kidding. That's so fucking gross. Put that away. 373 00:20:33,744 --> 00:20:38,367 - So, you guys sure about this? - Relax, man. It's just a frat party. 374 00:20:38,909 --> 00:20:40,409 What? 375 00:20:40,492 --> 00:20:42,907 What? We're here to learn about college, right? 376 00:20:43,191 --> 00:20:45,482 God, I love the new attitude, Kevin. It looks good on you, man. 377 00:20:45,565 --> 00:20:47,315 It makes your eyes pop and your hair shine. 378 00:20:47,398 --> 00:20:51,105 It makes your shirt look better. Good times. Good times. All right, guys. 379 00:20:51,189 --> 00:20:55,146 Hold onto your socks, because this is going to be awesome. 380 00:20:56,604 --> 00:20:57,646 (DANCE MUSIC PLAYING) 381 00:20:57,729 --> 00:21:01,102 Hey, guys! Come on in! The kegs are full and the Jacuzzi's hot! 382 00:21:01,186 --> 00:21:02,311 Yeah! 383 00:21:02,977 --> 00:21:04,143 Party! 384 00:21:04,726 --> 00:21:05,893 Yeah! 385 00:21:07,184 --> 00:21:11,016 What's up? Going on? Ladies? 386 00:21:15,681 --> 00:21:17,514 There's a lot of dudes here, right? 387 00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:20,056 Yeah. It's a total sausage fest. 388 00:21:21,888 --> 00:21:22,846 Check it out! 389 00:21:22,971 --> 00:21:26,470 These guys are so drunk they're making out with each other. 390 00:21:26,595 --> 00:21:27,969 Morris, I don't think they're drunk. 391 00:21:28,053 --> 00:21:30,427 Who wants to play glow-in-the-dark boners now? 392 00:21:30,511 --> 00:21:31,511 (CROWD CHEERING) 393 00:21:31,636 --> 00:21:34,176 It's boner tag! It's boner tag! 394 00:21:35,051 --> 00:21:36,176 (EXCLAIMING IN DISGUST) 395 00:21:41,341 --> 00:21:45,423 Why would they send us to an all-gay fraternity? Do we look gay? 396 00:21:45,507 --> 00:21:49,838 Maybe they found out how many times you've been laid and just assumed. 397 00:21:49,963 --> 00:21:51,129 Real funny, Carter. 398 00:21:51,213 --> 00:21:55,836 Look, my cousin's a legacy. I doubt they're gonna do that to us on purpose. 399 00:21:56,836 --> 00:22:00,543 Don't worry! That was not full of my piss or anything. 400 00:22:01,876 --> 00:22:03,584 Just Bearcat's. 401 00:22:03,667 --> 00:22:04,792 MAN: Yeah! 402 00:22:04,875 --> 00:22:07,625 Hey, how was the party? Did you guys find any dates? 403 00:22:07,708 --> 00:22:09,665 Yeah, real funny, guys. We almost got jumped back there. 404 00:22:09,790 --> 00:22:12,790 Watch your step, pre-frosh! This ain't high school! 405 00:22:12,915 --> 00:22:15,622 Welcome to college, boys. Enjoy. 406 00:22:18,497 --> 00:22:19,496 Crap. 407 00:22:20,871 --> 00:22:23,703 MAN: (SINGING) Don't talk about it 408 00:22:23,828 --> 00:22:27,702 Oh, boy, don't talk about it 409 00:22:27,827 --> 00:22:31,659 If you do, I'll die 410 00:22:39,073 --> 00:22:40,948 Holy shit! This is insane! 411 00:22:41,031 --> 00:22:43,781 No, man. This is fucking college. 412 00:22:44,197 --> 00:22:45,447 (IMPLANTS SQUISHING) 413 00:22:47,362 --> 00:22:49,987 God bless America for such a place! 414 00:22:50,987 --> 00:22:52,903 Let's rock this bitch. 415 00:22:57,818 --> 00:22:59,485 (GLASS SHATTERING) 416 00:23:01,317 --> 00:23:04,150 Hey! Hey! Hey! What's up, fellows? 417 00:23:04,816 --> 00:23:08,814 Look, we feel like absolute shit for what happened earlier. 418 00:23:08,939 --> 00:23:13,314 - Yeah. We think you guys are cool. - Yeah. It was just a joke. 419 00:23:13,397 --> 00:23:16,645 We weren't trying to be like assholes or anything. 420 00:23:17,312 --> 00:23:18,312 Let us make it up to you. 421 00:23:18,437 --> 00:23:19,853 We're gonna go do some body shots. 422 00:23:19,978 --> 00:23:23,102 And we would love it if you guys would come with us. 423 00:23:23,186 --> 00:23:24,643 Dude, we are so down! 424 00:23:24,769 --> 00:23:27,268 Actually, you know what? I just filled up, so I'm cool. 425 00:23:27,392 --> 00:23:30,100 Yeah, I think I'm gonna take a pass, too. 426 00:23:30,184 --> 00:23:31,141 (SCOFFS) 427 00:23:31,266 --> 00:23:33,766 Lame and lamer. 428 00:23:35,890 --> 00:23:38,889 Just saying, man, I guess Gina was right. 429 00:23:41,638 --> 00:23:43,013 Dude, where's the bathroom? 430 00:23:43,138 --> 00:23:46,636 All right. All right, you know what? Fuck it! I'm in. 431 00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:51,094 - COOPER: Bottle. - This is awesome. 432 00:23:56,509 --> 00:23:57,759 Salt. 433 00:24:00,924 --> 00:24:02,132 Limes. 434 00:24:05,298 --> 00:24:06,672 And lube. 435 00:24:08,380 --> 00:24:09,880 - What the hell is that for? - TEAGUE: Just in case. 436 00:24:09,963 --> 00:24:14,587 We probably won't need it. You guys... You guys are gonna love this. 437 00:24:14,712 --> 00:24:16,669 Where did the girls go? 438 00:24:16,794 --> 00:24:17,753 Unfortunately, 439 00:24:17,836 --> 00:24:18,960 (GRUNTS) 440 00:24:19,085 --> 00:24:20,501 the girls had to go home early. 441 00:24:21,835 --> 00:24:24,626 So who are we doing body shots off of? 442 00:24:24,751 --> 00:24:27,750 - Great question, Mike. - Morris. 443 00:24:27,875 --> 00:24:31,249 Bearcat was nice enough to take their place. 444 00:24:31,332 --> 00:24:32,790 Bearcat? 445 00:24:35,748 --> 00:24:36,747 MAN: Yeah! 446 00:24:37,130 --> 00:24:38,255 (GROANS) 447 00:24:41,921 --> 00:24:43,754 (ROARING) 448 00:24:48,752 --> 00:24:50,044 (ALL CHEERING) 449 00:24:50,918 --> 00:24:52,751 That's right, motherfuckers! 450 00:24:52,876 --> 00:24:54,791 - Okay, we're outta here, let's go. - Yeah. 451 00:24:54,917 --> 00:24:56,083 Where are you guys going? 452 00:24:56,208 --> 00:25:00,498 Yeah, we thought you guys were cool. We thought you wanted to party. 453 00:25:00,582 --> 00:25:02,332 Guess we were wrong. 454 00:25:02,414 --> 00:25:06,206 Well, have fun back at the dorm, you fucking pussies. 455 00:25:12,828 --> 00:25:14,744 (FRAT BOYS CHANTING) 456 00:25:19,826 --> 00:25:21,700 (ALL CHEERING) 457 00:25:39,237 --> 00:25:40,737 (FRAT BOYS CHANTING) 458 00:26:00,272 --> 00:26:02,605 - ALL: Do it! Do it! Do it! - Do it! Do it! Do it! 459 00:26:02,730 --> 00:26:05,062 - Do it! Do it! Do it! - Do it! Do it! Do it! 460 00:26:05,188 --> 00:26:07,645 - Do it! Do it! Do it! - Do it! Do it! Do it! 461 00:26:08,228 --> 00:26:09,561 - MAN: Do that shot! - Yeah! 462 00:26:09,686 --> 00:26:11,186 MAN: Do that shot! Do it! 463 00:26:14,934 --> 00:26:16,393 Watch this! 464 00:26:30,222 --> 00:26:32,096 You are my best friend! 465 00:26:32,221 --> 00:26:34,763 MAN: (SINGING) All the girls and the boys And people making noise 466 00:26:34,888 --> 00:26:36,012 Just let me hear you shout 467 00:26:36,137 --> 00:26:37,845 Bring them out Bring them out 468 00:26:37,928 --> 00:26:40,594 Everything's spinning around me. I'm drunk right now. 469 00:26:40,719 --> 00:26:44,176 Doing shots of tequila out of some guy's ass crack will do that to you. 470 00:26:44,301 --> 00:26:46,759 Whatever, man. You guys are lightweights. I don't feel shit! 471 00:26:46,884 --> 00:26:48,467 Is that a fat joke, you bitch? 472 00:26:48,550 --> 00:26:50,466 - Here! Video me! - Okay. 473 00:26:52,257 --> 00:26:55,214 Yeah, wait till Gina sees this! Party! 474 00:26:55,339 --> 00:26:57,589 (ALL CHEERING) 475 00:27:00,330 --> 00:27:02,287 Party! 476 00:27:08,410 --> 00:27:10,452 MAN: (SINGING) Pump up your fist If you twist like this 477 00:27:10,576 --> 00:27:11,701 Till the lights go out 478 00:27:11,826 --> 00:27:13,034 Bring them out Bring them out 479 00:27:14,408 --> 00:27:16,408 Katie 480 00:27:16,492 --> 00:27:19,241 I don't know why I even try 481 00:27:19,366 --> 00:27:21,531 'Cause lately 482 00:27:21,657 --> 00:27:24,240 You're always out with other guys 483 00:27:24,365 --> 00:27:26,780 Pretty baby 484 00:27:26,905 --> 00:27:29,363 Don't you know I'll treat you right 485 00:27:29,488 --> 00:27:31,987 I'll go crazy 486 00:27:32,071 --> 00:27:35,361 If you pass me up tonight 487 00:27:35,611 --> 00:27:38,027 Hey, hey, hey, hey 488 00:27:38,110 --> 00:27:40,443 Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey 489 00:27:40,568 --> 00:27:42,983 All this time can't get it off my mind 490 00:27:43,067 --> 00:27:44,691 Dance the night away 491 00:27:44,816 --> 00:27:45,775 Keep rocking with me 492 00:27:45,900 --> 00:27:48,149 When the grooves all right Rocking all night 493 00:27:48,233 --> 00:27:50,315 I want to hear you say 494 00:27:50,648 --> 00:27:53,189 All the girls and the boys And people making noise 495 00:27:53,272 --> 00:27:54,563 Just let me hear you shout 496 00:27:54,688 --> 00:27:55,980 Bring them out Bring them out 497 00:27:56,063 --> 00:27:58,354 All the girls and the boys And people making noise 498 00:27:58,479 --> 00:28:00,020 Just let me hear you shout 499 00:28:00,145 --> 00:28:01,187 Bring them out Bring them out 500 00:28:01,312 --> 00:28:03,186 Pump up your fist If you twist like this 501 00:28:05,019 --> 00:28:05,519 Till the lights go out 502 00:28:05,644 --> 00:28:06,602 Bring them out Bring them out 503 00:28:06,727 --> 00:28:08,392 Wake up 504 00:28:08,518 --> 00:28:11,184 I'm calling you up I need a ride 505 00:28:11,267 --> 00:28:13,391 We're gonna shake up 506 00:28:13,517 --> 00:28:16,224 So hurry it up, no wasted time 507 00:28:16,349 --> 00:28:19,389 The girls in their makeup In black and white 508 00:28:19,515 --> 00:28:21,722 Exchanging looks tonight 509 00:28:21,847 --> 00:28:24,721 I just ran into some other friends of mine 510 00:28:24,805 --> 00:28:27,221 Someone's coming round To pick them up at nine 511 00:28:27,346 --> 00:28:29,845 All the girls and the boys And people making noise 512 00:28:29,969 --> 00:28:30,969 Just let me hear you shout 513 00:28:31,053 --> 00:28:32,594 Bring them out Bring them out 514 00:28:33,144 --> 00:28:34,185 (SCREAMING) 515 00:28:34,560 --> 00:28:35,560 MAN: Fuck yeah! 516 00:28:37,351 --> 00:28:38,850 (HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING) 517 00:28:53,323 --> 00:28:54,573 Drink! 518 00:28:56,114 --> 00:28:59,280 - Sorry. What? - I made the shot. Now you drink. 519 00:28:59,405 --> 00:29:01,945 Yeah, yeah, right. Cool. All right. 520 00:29:06,777 --> 00:29:09,485 - So when do I get a turn? - When I miss. 521 00:29:11,151 --> 00:29:12,942 You kids having fun? 522 00:29:14,983 --> 00:29:17,192 What? I can't play? 523 00:29:18,940 --> 00:29:23,564 What do you say we wrap up this game and bring it up to my room? 524 00:29:24,106 --> 00:29:25,397 Minus the dickhead. 525 00:29:25,522 --> 00:29:27,563 Yeah. I think I'll pass. 526 00:29:32,978 --> 00:29:35,935 Could I get the beer? No? Later? Well, okay. 527 00:29:37,227 --> 00:29:39,767 - What an a-hole. - Tell me about it. 528 00:29:40,226 --> 00:29:42,100 Anyway, where were we? 529 00:29:42,392 --> 00:29:43,683 (COIN PLOPPING) 530 00:29:44,433 --> 00:29:45,641 Nice. 531 00:29:48,098 --> 00:29:51,098 Nitrous in the hizzie! Who wants a balloon? 532 00:29:53,431 --> 00:29:55,929 Granola Bar! Can I have one, please? 533 00:29:56,013 --> 00:29:58,220 Whoa, whoa, whoa! The lady needs a balloon. 534 00:29:58,304 --> 00:30:00,137 There you go, darling, that one's just for you. 535 00:30:00,262 --> 00:30:02,261 - I'm gonna sit. - All right. 536 00:30:06,093 --> 00:30:10,050 Hey, here you go. Have a balloon. 537 00:30:10,134 --> 00:30:12,924 This balloon's for you! Have a balloon! 538 00:30:14,591 --> 00:30:15,882 No, no. 539 00:30:17,007 --> 00:30:21,672 You have to inhale it. It makes chicks crazy horny, like her. 540 00:30:22,088 --> 00:30:23,338 MORRIS: Wow. 541 00:30:24,921 --> 00:30:26,379 (INHALING DEEPLY) 542 00:30:27,087 --> 00:30:28,879 Feel the flow. 543 00:30:32,752 --> 00:30:37,459 Hey, I saw a laundry room back there. You want to go make out or something? 544 00:30:38,043 --> 00:30:40,916 - Oh, my God! Are you serious? - Yeah. 545 00:30:41,042 --> 00:30:44,957 I haven't heard a line like that since, like, high school. Later. 546 00:30:45,914 --> 00:30:47,789 You've got flat tits! 547 00:30:48,831 --> 00:30:50,039 Do you mind? 548 00:30:50,122 --> 00:30:53,912 What? Yeah, absolutely. Have a... Have a sip. 549 00:30:56,661 --> 00:30:59,785 Or down the whole thing. That's cool. Whatever. 550 00:30:59,910 --> 00:31:01,244 (BURPING) 551 00:31:08,366 --> 00:31:11,699 I'm so getting laid. Excuse me. Excuse me! 552 00:31:12,115 --> 00:31:13,656 Excuse me. Excuse me! 553 00:31:13,740 --> 00:31:15,364 What's up? How's it going? 554 00:31:15,489 --> 00:31:17,864 Excuse me! Excuse me! Excuse me! Excuse me! 555 00:31:17,947 --> 00:31:19,863 You're bigger than me. Excuse me! Excuse me! 556 00:31:30,068 --> 00:31:31,735 This is awesome! 557 00:31:42,939 --> 00:31:45,148 Wait. What was that? 558 00:31:45,731 --> 00:31:47,147 (GIRLS LAUGHING) 559 00:31:47,272 --> 00:31:49,604 Shit! I think someone's coming. 560 00:31:53,061 --> 00:31:54,103 - No, no, no. The bed, the bed! - What? 561 00:31:54,228 --> 00:31:55,311 - I'm not gonna fit under there! - You'll fit! 562 00:31:55,394 --> 00:31:58,185 - I will not fit under this bed. - Get under! 563 00:31:59,727 --> 00:31:59,976 (DOOR OPENING) 564 00:32:03,100 --> 00:32:05,100 Are you sure this room's okay? 565 00:32:05,225 --> 00:32:08,807 It's fine. Relax, okay? Everyone's downstairs. 566 00:32:09,223 --> 00:32:11,598 - Are you sure? - Yeah. Positive. 567 00:32:11,973 --> 00:32:15,305 GIRL 1: I'm just a little nervous, you know? I've never really been with a girl before. 568 00:32:15,763 --> 00:32:20,262 GIRL 2: Don't worry. I'll be gentle. I promise. 569 00:32:27,051 --> 00:32:28,135 (INAUDIBLE) 570 00:32:37,382 --> 00:32:40,506 Morris, maybe it's because I'm really high right now, 571 00:32:40,590 --> 00:32:42,881 but I will just go for this. 572 00:32:42,964 --> 00:32:45,379 Go for what? You want another... 573 00:32:56,251 --> 00:33:00,375 Sorry. Your hand is down my pants. 574 00:33:00,458 --> 00:33:02,374 I know. Just relax. 575 00:33:03,666 --> 00:33:05,040 Sweet! 576 00:33:06,331 --> 00:33:09,081 Oh, God! That feels so good! 577 00:33:09,873 --> 00:33:13,454 - Your hands are like butter! - Are like butter. 578 00:33:14,745 --> 00:33:18,036 You know, normally, I'd be doing this to myself, 579 00:33:18,744 --> 00:33:21,077 but this is way better. 580 00:33:21,161 --> 00:33:24,577 Plus, I don't have to worry about my mom walking in, and... 581 00:33:31,241 --> 00:33:33,699 Heather? Hello? 582 00:33:33,824 --> 00:33:35,240 (SNORING) 583 00:33:36,031 --> 00:33:38,114 Damn it! So close! 584 00:33:38,489 --> 00:33:39,905 (SIRENS BLARING) 585 00:33:51,421 --> 00:33:52,672 Cop! 586 00:33:53,404 --> 00:33:54,778 - What's your problem? - Hey, come on. 587 00:33:54,903 --> 00:33:56,611 - Run! - Who is that? 588 00:33:58,777 --> 00:34:01,569 Party's busted! Everybody run! 589 00:34:06,151 --> 00:34:07,525 GIRL: That sucks. 590 00:34:09,941 --> 00:34:11,232 (GIRL MOANING) 591 00:34:16,647 --> 00:34:18,063 GIRL 1: That feels so good. 592 00:34:18,188 --> 00:34:20,938 GIRL 2: I almost forgot. GIRL 1: You carry that with you? 593 00:34:21,063 --> 00:34:23,271 GIRL 2: They don't call it a pocket rocket for nothing. 594 00:34:23,396 --> 00:34:24,603 (INAUDIBLE) 595 00:34:25,478 --> 00:34:26,853 (VIBRATOR BUZZING) 596 00:34:29,310 --> 00:34:30,726 GIRL 1: You got it? 597 00:34:31,685 --> 00:34:34,143 GIRL 2: Yeah. I got it. Where were we? 598 00:34:34,267 --> 00:34:35,392 (GIRL 1 MOANING) 599 00:34:40,682 --> 00:34:43,140 GIRL 2: I didn't know you were so kinky. 600 00:34:48,346 --> 00:34:49,513 GIRL 1: Yeah! 601 00:34:50,470 --> 00:34:52,470 Kiss me. Kiss me now. 602 00:34:52,554 --> 00:34:54,803 - GIRL 2: Really? - Kiss me! 603 00:34:54,886 --> 00:34:56,635 Do it! 604 00:34:56,719 --> 00:34:59,385 - What was that? - GIRL 2: I didn't hear anything. 605 00:34:59,510 --> 00:35:02,008 - GIRL 1: Are you sure? - Yeah. Just relax. 606 00:35:02,592 --> 00:35:05,050 What the fuck do you know about welfare reform? 607 00:35:05,133 --> 00:35:07,632 MAN: Come on down and check it out. 608 00:35:12,756 --> 00:35:13,922 (CELL PHONE BEEPS) 609 00:35:20,379 --> 00:35:24,836 So, I don't really know what this means, 610 00:35:26,085 --> 00:35:30,334 but Amy says that she's under the bed with your friend Carter. 611 00:35:30,418 --> 00:35:32,792 (BOTH LAUGHING) 612 00:35:32,874 --> 00:35:35,207 - Should I be worried? - Yeah, definitely. 613 00:35:35,290 --> 00:35:36,832 Okay. 614 00:35:36,915 --> 00:35:39,789 Wait a second. Why aren't they on top of the bed? 615 00:35:39,872 --> 00:35:41,872 That's a good question. 616 00:35:44,496 --> 00:35:47,329 So what are you guys? Freshmen? 617 00:35:49,203 --> 00:35:52,036 Yeah. Yeah, yeah, we're freshmen. Yep. 618 00:35:52,119 --> 00:35:53,785 What's your major? 619 00:35:53,868 --> 00:35:55,743 Uh... 620 00:35:55,868 --> 00:35:58,325 - Photography. - Really? 621 00:35:59,033 --> 00:36:03,533 I love photography. I really suck, but that's cool. 622 00:36:03,657 --> 00:36:05,365 I heard they have a really great program here. 623 00:36:05,490 --> 00:36:08,031 Yeah. It's supposed to be one of the best in the country. 624 00:36:08,156 --> 00:36:10,738 Maybe you can give me a lesson sometime. 625 00:36:10,863 --> 00:36:12,363 Yeah, sure. 626 00:36:13,696 --> 00:36:15,029 (DOOR CLOSING) 627 00:36:17,195 --> 00:36:18,695 That was so hot. 628 00:36:18,820 --> 00:36:20,486 Please tell me you're as horny as I am right now. 629 00:36:20,569 --> 00:36:21,568 - Hornier. - Good. 630 00:36:21,694 --> 00:36:22,860 BEARCAT: What's up, man? 631 00:36:22,985 --> 00:36:26,900 Wow, motherfucker, I can't believe we did that shit last night. 632 00:36:41,146 --> 00:36:42,562 What the... 633 00:36:44,187 --> 00:36:46,020 Christmas came early! 634 00:36:46,311 --> 00:36:47,686 (VIBRATOR BUZZING) 635 00:36:47,769 --> 00:36:49,769 (BEARCAT MOANING) 636 00:36:58,516 --> 00:37:01,807 - Here we are. - Yep. Here we are. 637 00:37:02,974 --> 00:37:06,014 You know, you're different than most college guys. 638 00:37:06,138 --> 00:37:09,930 Well, you know, I don't even really feel like a college guy. 639 00:37:10,720 --> 00:37:13,637 Yeah. I could tell. But it's a good thing. 640 00:37:18,593 --> 00:37:21,051 - Maybe I'll see you around. - Yeah. 641 00:37:21,968 --> 00:37:24,300 - I hope so. - Okay. Bye. 642 00:37:24,425 --> 00:37:26,050 In the night sky 643 00:37:27,674 --> 00:37:30,674 In the night sky 644 00:37:31,798 --> 00:37:34,713 In the night sky 645 00:37:40,003 --> 00:37:44,752 In the night sky It used to be home 646 00:37:47,793 --> 00:37:49,626 - Kevin! - Jesus, what? 647 00:37:50,793 --> 00:37:52,167 What do you want? 648 00:38:23,990 --> 00:38:27,115 Morris. Wake up, sleepy. 649 00:38:35,821 --> 00:38:38,529 Holy shit. Did we... 650 00:38:38,653 --> 00:38:40,985 Heck, yeah! All night long. 651 00:38:41,069 --> 00:38:42,069 (GROWLING) 652 00:38:42,152 --> 00:38:43,568 Give it to me again, big boy! 653 00:38:43,652 --> 00:38:46,276 This is the greatest day of my life. 654 00:38:48,317 --> 00:38:52,024 Hey, Dad. Dad! What are you doing here? 655 00:38:52,149 --> 00:38:57,481 You missed your interview, Morris. You blew it, the scholarship, Fieldmont, 656 00:38:58,814 --> 00:39:00,271 everything. 657 00:39:01,021 --> 00:39:02,313 (SCREAMING) 658 00:39:10,144 --> 00:39:11,394 Shit! 659 00:39:14,643 --> 00:39:16,267 The interview! 660 00:39:26,972 --> 00:39:28,263 Give it up 661 00:39:31,471 --> 00:39:32,804 Give it up 662 00:39:36,053 --> 00:39:37,344 Give it up 663 00:39:40,635 --> 00:39:41,593 Give it up 664 00:39:48,091 --> 00:39:50,674 Apparently, Mr. Hooper's a no-show. 665 00:39:55,339 --> 00:39:56,797 MORRIS: Thank God! 666 00:39:57,963 --> 00:40:00,837 You're still here. I'm sorry I'm late. 667 00:40:05,628 --> 00:40:10,459 Now, behind me is the bronze statue of a revolutionary war hero, 668 00:40:10,542 --> 00:40:12,792 General W.S. Fieldmont. 669 00:40:12,917 --> 00:40:16,707 It has become one of the most sacred landmarks of our time. 670 00:40:18,873 --> 00:40:22,705 My life is over. My parents are gonna disown me. 671 00:40:22,789 --> 00:40:27,663 - Dude, they probably didn't even notice. - Didn't notice? Did you see my face? 672 00:40:27,788 --> 00:40:28,954 (LAUGHING) 673 00:40:29,079 --> 00:40:32,078 Yeah, dude, I did. That shit was so funny. 674 00:40:32,161 --> 00:40:35,785 Whatever, dude. Just kiss the scholarship bye-bye and move on. 675 00:40:35,910 --> 00:40:37,285 And where the hell is Kevin, by the way? 676 00:40:37,409 --> 00:40:39,867 You know, he should've been here by now. This is his campus tour. 677 00:40:39,951 --> 00:40:43,824 He probably just hooked up last night. At least someone did. 678 00:40:44,783 --> 00:40:46,907 You don't think something happened to him, do you? 679 00:40:47,032 --> 00:40:50,614 Dude, it's college. What could possibly happen to him? 680 00:40:53,738 --> 00:40:55,738 (ALL LAUGHING) 681 00:41:11,983 --> 00:41:16,440 Looking good, Kev. A lot hairier than I thought you'd be. 682 00:41:22,146 --> 00:41:24,479 - Check it out. - Hey! 683 00:41:24,604 --> 00:41:27,229 - Nice diaper! - Looking good, buddy! 684 00:41:31,268 --> 00:41:33,601 Okay. This is really embarrassing. 685 00:41:33,684 --> 00:41:36,100 Yeah, it's not really the highlight of my day either, Carter. 686 00:41:36,184 --> 00:41:37,433 Why would they do this to you? 687 00:41:37,558 --> 00:41:42,349 I don't know. Because they can, I guess. There's some clothes in my car. Try... 688 00:41:50,930 --> 00:41:52,179 Maybe we should just go home. 689 00:41:52,262 --> 00:41:54,012 We're not going anywhere, all right? Not yet. 690 00:41:54,095 --> 00:41:56,512 Why not? What are you trying to prove? 691 00:41:56,595 --> 00:42:00,052 I'm not trying to prove anything. I'm just trying to have fun. 692 00:42:00,177 --> 00:42:02,843 Amen to that! God, I love the new Kevin! 693 00:42:02,926 --> 00:42:04,634 You call this having a good time? 694 00:42:04,759 --> 00:42:08,133 I'll get back at them. It could have been worse. 695 00:42:08,257 --> 00:42:11,090 What could be worse than getting duct-taped naked to a statue all night? 696 00:42:11,423 --> 00:42:14,923 Hey, what's up, Gina? It's that boring guy you dumped! 697 00:42:15,048 --> 00:42:16,755 Fieldmont rocks! 698 00:42:17,005 --> 00:42:19,546 (KEVIN WHOOPING) 699 00:42:27,419 --> 00:42:29,335 Dude, maybe the message didn't even send. 700 00:42:29,418 --> 00:42:32,043 You know what? Whatever, I'm kind of hoping it did. 701 00:42:32,167 --> 00:42:35,583 Really? Well, in that case, let's do like a whole Kevin party series. 702 00:42:35,666 --> 00:42:37,458 - We'll post it online... - Yeah, dude, don't push it. 703 00:42:37,582 --> 00:42:38,707 Okay. 704 00:42:41,581 --> 00:42:44,247 Come on, Morris. Being stuck here isn't the worst thing. 705 00:42:44,372 --> 00:42:46,871 You know, I mean, it's probably for the best. 706 00:42:46,954 --> 00:42:48,163 How's it for the best? 707 00:42:48,246 --> 00:42:50,661 Because if you went home now, you know exactly what would happen. 708 00:42:50,745 --> 00:42:54,203 Yeah! Your parents would go ape-shit on your ass for blowing the big interview. 709 00:42:54,328 --> 00:42:56,744 And now at least you could probably talk to that Dean Chandler guy. 710 00:42:56,826 --> 00:42:58,826 You know, explain what happened. 711 00:42:58,910 --> 00:43:00,618 You really think that would work? 712 00:43:00,742 --> 00:43:02,909 I think it's worth a shot. What do you have to lose? 713 00:43:03,033 --> 00:43:04,200 And you may see that Heather chick again 714 00:43:04,283 --> 00:43:06,824 and get more than a half hand job. 715 00:43:08,573 --> 00:43:10,906 I think he'll definitely see her again. 716 00:43:11,530 --> 00:43:12,739 (CARTER EXCLAIMS) 717 00:43:14,489 --> 00:43:15,905 Yeah. 718 00:43:16,237 --> 00:43:18,029 (HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING) 719 00:43:42,396 --> 00:43:47,395 By the way, I sort of accidentally told Kendall we were in college last night. 720 00:44:26,476 --> 00:44:28,600 Looks like those high school fuckers aren't as stupid as we thought. 721 00:44:28,725 --> 00:44:30,641 They got front row seats to nipple city. 722 00:44:36,264 --> 00:44:38,597 Motherfuckers! 723 00:44:40,138 --> 00:44:42,138 It's part of the whole sorority experience. 724 00:44:42,221 --> 00:44:45,803 Fraternities throw parties, and we have charity events. 725 00:44:45,887 --> 00:44:47,761 Nice! Are any of them naked? 726 00:44:47,886 --> 00:44:48,844 (BLOWING WHISTLE) 727 00:44:48,969 --> 00:44:52,052 All right, bitches, you're up! This isn't social hour! 728 00:44:52,177 --> 00:44:53,925 So I guess you better go, huh? 729 00:44:54,051 --> 00:44:55,967 Yeah, but maybe if you're lucky, 730 00:44:56,051 --> 00:44:58,799 we'll let you guys buy us a few beers tonight at Bruno's. 731 00:44:58,883 --> 00:45:00,716 - What's that? - A bar. 732 00:45:01,215 --> 00:45:03,964 Wait. You guys do go to bars, right? 733 00:45:05,131 --> 00:45:09,047 - Bars? Yeah. All the time. - Every day. I'm always at the bar. 734 00:45:09,588 --> 00:45:12,087 Just make sure you bring this guy. 735 00:45:12,545 --> 00:45:14,086 - This guy? - Me? 736 00:45:14,211 --> 00:45:15,462 Yeah, you. 737 00:45:15,544 --> 00:45:19,169 Last night was the first frat party I actually enjoyed. 738 00:45:19,294 --> 00:45:20,917 Because of me? 739 00:45:21,209 --> 00:45:24,667 - Okay. - Well, we'll see you guys tonight then. 740 00:45:26,666 --> 00:45:29,957 Hey, I was thinking maybe we could, you know, 741 00:45:30,041 --> 00:45:31,914 finish what we started last night. 742 00:45:32,040 --> 00:45:35,247 Maybe. Just try not to pass out on me this time. 743 00:45:39,079 --> 00:45:40,163 God, that girl fucking rocks. 744 00:45:44,036 --> 00:45:45,077 - Kev? - Yeah? 745 00:45:45,202 --> 00:45:51,242 On a scale of one to ten, I like boobies at, like, 9,000. Seriously. 746 00:45:51,367 --> 00:45:53,283 What's up, fellows? 747 00:45:53,992 --> 00:45:54,991 Hey, Kevin! 748 00:45:55,074 --> 00:45:59,489 Heard you and the General got a little cozy last night. Jesus Christ! 749 00:46:00,115 --> 00:46:02,156 Yeah. Yeah, that was a good one, Teague. 750 00:46:02,239 --> 00:46:06,196 Hey, I don't suppose you know what happened to my car, do you? 751 00:46:10,278 --> 00:46:12,736 - So that's how it's gonna be, Teague? - That's right, pre-frosh. 752 00:46:12,861 --> 00:46:15,776 In fact, we got a job for you three douche bags. 753 00:46:15,860 --> 00:46:17,943 What kind of job? 754 00:46:18,026 --> 00:46:22,150 Nothing much. We're just gonna need you to clean the house for our party tonight. 755 00:46:22,233 --> 00:46:26,523 Maybe wash my car. You know how I like to keep my ride clean. 756 00:46:26,648 --> 00:46:28,898 Where did I put them keys? 757 00:46:29,898 --> 00:46:31,314 (EXCLAIMING) 758 00:46:39,520 --> 00:46:43,186 - Fuck that! No! - Am I sensing some hostility? 759 00:46:43,311 --> 00:46:44,351 Wait, are you guys serious? 760 00:46:44,476 --> 00:46:45,893 Well, you guys didn't think your room and board 761 00:46:46,018 --> 00:46:47,350 were gonna be free here, did you? 762 00:46:47,475 --> 00:46:49,517 We're not cleaning your house! No fucking way! 763 00:46:49,641 --> 00:46:52,433 Well, maybe your little girlfriends over there would like to find out 764 00:46:52,516 --> 00:46:54,891 you guys are still in high school. 765 00:46:55,015 --> 00:46:56,348 How do you know we didn't already tell them? 766 00:46:56,473 --> 00:47:00,930 Because if you did, they wouldn't be giving you the time of day, you little dicks. 767 00:47:01,014 --> 00:47:03,429 Better get to work now, boys! 768 00:47:03,512 --> 00:47:05,220 TEAGUE: Pick the keys up. 769 00:47:08,761 --> 00:47:09,886 Boom! 770 00:47:12,759 --> 00:47:15,468 And Kevin? Kevy? 771 00:47:16,967 --> 00:47:18,758 Don't waste your time with Kendall. 772 00:47:18,842 --> 00:47:21,133 You don't want my sloppy seconds, do you? 773 00:47:21,215 --> 00:47:24,673 Unless you're into that? You fucking sicko! Go inside. 774 00:47:30,838 --> 00:47:34,378 Dude, why do we have to clean? Don't they got pledges to do this shit? 775 00:47:34,503 --> 00:47:37,461 Dude, I think this weekend we are the pledges. 776 00:47:39,544 --> 00:47:41,501 (BEER SONG PLAYING) 777 00:47:51,498 --> 00:47:53,539 MAN: (SINGING) Don't let them take it all away 778 00:47:58,163 --> 00:48:00,329 I'm down on my luck I'm out on the streets 779 00:48:00,455 --> 00:48:02,870 I'm at wit's end I've nearly been beat 780 00:48:02,995 --> 00:48:05,952 See they've taken my home They've taken my wife 781 00:48:06,077 --> 00:48:08,368 They've taken my job And they've taken my life 782 00:48:08,493 --> 00:48:11,118 But there's one thing That they will not take 783 00:48:11,201 --> 00:48:13,950 That I will hold till the end Until my dying day 784 00:48:14,033 --> 00:48:16,657 'Cause it's part of me And it's time that we say 785 00:48:16,782 --> 00:48:19,781 They will not take it all away! 786 00:48:34,944 --> 00:48:36,818 Don't let them take it all away 787 00:48:40,359 --> 00:48:42,358 It's getting harder every day 788 00:48:45,816 --> 00:48:47,815 Brothers, sisters, hear me say 789 00:48:51,939 --> 00:48:54,771 I'm pounding the pavement Through thick and thin 790 00:48:54,855 --> 00:48:57,229 Good times and bad I just can't win 791 00:48:57,312 --> 00:49:00,311 I've been beat on, kicked on Insulted to my face 792 00:49:00,395 --> 00:49:02,686 The whole bleeding world thinks I'm a bleeding disgrace 793 00:49:02,811 --> 00:49:05,768 Yeah, they can own my body But they'll never own my mind 794 00:49:05,852 --> 00:49:08,101 So they better face the facts 'Cause now is the time 795 00:49:08,184 --> 00:49:11,142 Till we all join hands And all of us say 796 00:49:11,267 --> 00:49:14,099 They will not take it all away 797 00:49:25,679 --> 00:49:28,428 That's really funny. 'Cause I've been cleaning all day, 798 00:49:28,553 --> 00:49:30,969 so you think that it'd be funny to come in and throw a cup down. 799 00:49:31,052 --> 00:49:34,010 Because I've been working really hard and you want to ruin that for me. 800 00:49:34,135 --> 00:49:37,842 I love that! You're just... You're so fucking cool, you bitch. 801 00:49:37,967 --> 00:49:41,300 Yeah, get some, you punk-ass bitch! Come here, you steaming fuck! 802 00:49:50,713 --> 00:49:55,254 - I don't know if this is a good idea. - You want that scholarship, don't you? 803 00:49:56,461 --> 00:49:57,587 Go on. 804 00:50:02,293 --> 00:50:07,417 Come on, man! You can do it! I believe in you! You're the coolest, bro! 805 00:50:08,541 --> 00:50:11,957 - Yeah, he's totally fucked. Yep. - Yeah, totally. 806 00:50:12,290 --> 00:50:13,707 Shit! Run away! 807 00:50:15,290 --> 00:50:21,204 Let's just say that this morning was, well, rather shocking. 808 00:50:21,745 --> 00:50:24,744 Heck, I didn't even know what some of those words meant. 809 00:50:24,869 --> 00:50:27,119 I had to search the Internet for them. 810 00:50:27,244 --> 00:50:31,576 But I guess that's what happens when you choose to stay at a frat house, 811 00:50:31,659 --> 00:50:34,617 rather than the dorm room we assigned you. 812 00:50:34,700 --> 00:50:37,616 I know, sir. It was a bad choice. 813 00:50:37,700 --> 00:50:42,739 Christ, if I had my way, I'd kick every fraternity off this campus. 814 00:50:42,865 --> 00:50:47,904 Do you know that those animals suck nitrous oxide 815 00:50:48,029 --> 00:50:51,195 out of balloons just to get high? 816 00:50:51,279 --> 00:50:53,528 Really? That's just awful! 817 00:50:54,278 --> 00:50:55,444 (CHUCKLING) 818 00:50:56,277 --> 00:51:00,693 Mr. Hooper, there is no doubt that you are academically gifted, 819 00:51:02,025 --> 00:51:07,065 but the scholarships we give out here are about much more than just that. 820 00:51:07,190 --> 00:51:09,190 Dean Chandler, that's me. 821 00:51:09,982 --> 00:51:12,064 My family has a long history at Fieldmont, 822 00:51:12,189 --> 00:51:14,855 and I'd like to continue that legacy. 823 00:51:14,938 --> 00:51:17,563 Well, you know, son, I guess you're gonna have to prove it to me. 824 00:51:17,646 --> 00:51:19,603 For, as of right now, Mr. Hooper, 825 00:51:19,687 --> 00:51:23,853 you and your scholarship are hanging by a thread. 826 00:51:29,392 --> 00:51:32,183 God! You're so lame! 827 00:51:32,267 --> 00:51:34,099 Dude, where have you been? It's go time! 828 00:51:34,224 --> 00:51:38,764 Relax! Relax! I just had to run a little errand. 829 00:51:39,764 --> 00:51:43,596 All my years of hard work have finally paid off! That's my boy. 830 00:51:45,804 --> 00:51:48,011 - Nice. - What's wrong, Morris? 831 00:51:49,636 --> 00:51:52,885 What's wrong? I'm having a breakdown, Kevin! 832 00:51:52,969 --> 00:51:54,843 Or have you forgotten what that feels like? 833 00:51:54,926 --> 00:51:56,926 - I understand, man. - What am I gonna do? 834 00:51:57,009 --> 00:52:00,883 Somehow, I have to convince the Dean that I actually want to go here. 835 00:52:00,967 --> 00:52:03,133 Well, look, there's nothing you can do about it tonight, all right? 836 00:52:03,258 --> 00:52:07,048 - So let's just go get our girls. Here. - This doesn't even look like me. 837 00:52:07,172 --> 00:52:09,172 Whatever, Morris. Just tell the bouncer you don't photograph well. 838 00:52:09,297 --> 00:52:10,839 Let me see it. 839 00:52:12,213 --> 00:52:16,753 Dude, this will totally work! You guys are both just so ugly. 840 00:52:16,878 --> 00:52:19,002 You're a little uglier, but it'll be good. Don't worry about it. 841 00:52:19,294 --> 00:52:20,752 (LAUGHING) 842 00:52:21,043 --> 00:52:22,751 Laquisha? 843 00:52:22,876 --> 00:52:26,667 Man, you actually expect me to buy that your name is Laquisha? 844 00:52:27,458 --> 00:52:29,999 You know what? I like how you roll, dog. You in. 845 00:52:30,083 --> 00:52:32,332 10 bucks cover tonight, guys. 846 00:52:33,832 --> 00:52:35,039 Shit! 847 00:52:35,747 --> 00:52:38,288 - Sorry, guys. No dough, no go. - Fuck! 848 00:52:39,080 --> 00:52:40,205 Let the ladies through. 849 00:52:40,287 --> 00:52:42,745 Let the ladies through. Let the ladies through. 850 00:52:42,829 --> 00:52:47,036 - What was that? They didn't pay. - Did you see the size of those racks? 851 00:52:48,744 --> 00:52:52,326 - No. - Yeah, you big, big man. 852 00:52:52,410 --> 00:52:54,950 You like that when I squeeze them together for you? 853 00:52:55,075 --> 00:52:56,033 I said no. 854 00:52:59,990 --> 00:53:02,490 I cannot believe those assholes ripped us off. 855 00:53:02,573 --> 00:53:05,072 They've done pretty much everything else to us so far this weekend. 856 00:53:05,155 --> 00:53:06,905 Why not that? 857 00:53:07,030 --> 00:53:08,488 Man, do you think this is what it's going to be like 858 00:53:08,613 --> 00:53:11,570 - when we're really in college? - Who knows? 859 00:53:11,654 --> 00:53:14,736 Well, we probably won't all be together. I know that. 860 00:53:14,861 --> 00:53:17,443 God, Morris, you're such a fucking baby! Would you stop being a girl? 861 00:53:17,568 --> 00:53:20,693 - Would you please just shut up? - What? It's true! 862 00:53:20,818 --> 00:53:24,192 Think about it, guys. This is it! Senior year. 863 00:53:26,274 --> 00:53:28,315 Man, he's right. This is it. 864 00:53:28,399 --> 00:53:30,815 You know, all the more of a reason to take advantage of being here. 865 00:53:30,898 --> 00:53:32,481 All right, I'm not sitting around. Come on, you guys! 866 00:53:32,564 --> 00:53:33,605 Where are you going? 867 00:53:33,730 --> 00:53:36,188 What do you think? We've got a frat party to go to. Come on! 868 00:53:36,313 --> 00:53:38,688 - What about the girls? - Shut up. 869 00:53:40,436 --> 00:53:41,561 (MORRIS GROANING) 870 00:53:42,811 --> 00:53:43,894 - It hurts. - Morris, let's go! 871 00:53:44,019 --> 00:53:45,394 Come on. 872 00:53:45,519 --> 00:53:48,476 - Wait for me! - You're so slow! You're so slow! 873 00:53:49,393 --> 00:53:52,392 MAN: (SINGING) I was on my way up She was on her way down 874 00:53:52,517 --> 00:53:56,265 And I didn't know I crossed that line 875 00:53:56,391 --> 00:54:00,847 Make me sick to my stomach When I think of that woman 876 00:54:00,973 --> 00:54:03,763 Sitting in this cell of mine 877 00:54:04,180 --> 00:54:08,054 I said, "Goddamn, I'm only a man" 878 00:54:08,178 --> 00:54:11,344 Give me 15 years to life 879 00:54:12,219 --> 00:54:14,010 Jailbait 880 00:54:17,509 --> 00:54:20,841 (JAILBAIT CONTINUES PLAYING) 881 00:54:31,047 --> 00:54:33,546 (SLICE OF LIFE PLAYING) 882 00:54:44,709 --> 00:54:46,459 GIRL: Come on, cowboy. 883 00:54:48,042 --> 00:54:49,124 MAN: Yeah! 884 00:54:49,999 --> 00:54:53,165 GIRL: You guys ready to celebrate? All right! 885 00:54:56,872 --> 00:54:58,622 Where's my whip? 886 00:55:00,080 --> 00:55:02,454 You want to be my bitch, huh? 887 00:55:06,827 --> 00:55:08,161 Pass it on. 888 00:55:33,195 --> 00:55:34,362 (EXCLAIMS) 889 00:55:37,860 --> 00:55:41,943 - Fellows, it's not polite to stare! - What the fuck, man? What's up? 890 00:55:42,526 --> 00:55:46,274 Ladies, I want you to meet some very special guests. 891 00:55:46,358 --> 00:55:48,024 - Hi, boys. - What's up? 892 00:55:48,149 --> 00:55:51,815 - Hi, cutie. - Me? Hi. 893 00:55:51,940 --> 00:55:54,189 Wait. You're the Penthouse Pet of the Year. 894 00:55:54,314 --> 00:55:55,438 Mmm-hmm. 895 00:55:55,522 --> 00:55:58,896 - (STAMMERING) And you're... - On the cover of Penthouse Letters. 896 00:55:59,021 --> 00:56:01,812 Fellows! Good for you for staying current. 897 00:56:01,895 --> 00:56:03,144 (SIGHS) 898 00:56:03,269 --> 00:56:07,477 Where were we? Where were we? Where were... 899 00:56:10,392 --> 00:56:12,642 Yeah, that's right. Ladies? 900 00:56:12,767 --> 00:56:16,016 These guys were nice enough to pay for all this. 901 00:56:16,140 --> 00:56:18,640 Wait a second. That's what you did with our money? You paid for this party? 902 00:56:18,765 --> 00:56:21,639 Hey, kegs aren't cheap these days, my man. 903 00:56:21,764 --> 00:56:23,764 Neither are the circus animals we got coming later. 904 00:56:23,846 --> 00:56:25,554 Wait! You couldn't have paid for this. 905 00:56:25,679 --> 00:56:27,096 We didn't even have that much money in our wallets. 906 00:56:27,179 --> 00:56:30,803 - Yeah. - Yeah. What's up with that? 907 00:56:30,928 --> 00:56:32,636 Luckily, you guys had some plastic. 908 00:56:32,761 --> 00:56:34,552 God, my parents gave me that in case of an emergency. 909 00:56:34,676 --> 00:56:36,635 Well, good thing they got such a high limit! 910 00:56:36,718 --> 00:56:40,300 We almost maxed those puppies out. Especially on this guy. 911 00:56:41,008 --> 00:56:42,424 Verne Troyer? 912 00:56:42,966 --> 00:56:45,132 - That's Mini-Me. - Verne! 913 00:56:48,173 --> 00:56:51,880 - Why do you keep hitting me? Fuck! - Shut up, bitch! 914 00:56:52,922 --> 00:56:54,338 Fucking Mini-Me. 915 00:56:54,463 --> 00:56:57,712 It was Bearcat's idea. God, I love that guy. 916 00:56:59,336 --> 00:57:03,293 Anyhow, we've gotta go be social. 917 00:57:03,418 --> 00:57:06,959 You douche bags have fun. Okay? Okay. 918 00:57:07,084 --> 00:57:08,250 Babies? 919 00:57:11,208 --> 00:57:14,332 That was so weird, but so hot! Dude, she grabbed my nipple! 920 00:57:14,457 --> 00:57:16,414 Dude, she twisted my nipple, dude! 921 00:57:16,539 --> 00:57:19,789 So, basically, this is our party. 922 00:57:19,872 --> 00:57:24,787 - Yeah. In a roundabout way, I guess it is. - Why don't I like where this is going? 923 00:57:24,870 --> 00:57:26,953 Come on, Morris! I mean, we paid for it. We may as well enjoy it. 924 00:57:27,078 --> 00:57:29,661 - That's my boy! - Come on! Who wants to keg stand? 925 00:57:29,786 --> 00:57:32,660 Me! Me! I'm first! I wanna go first! Please. 926 00:57:35,493 --> 00:57:37,034 (LET'S GO GET WASTED PLAYING) 927 00:57:37,158 --> 00:57:40,116 - Have you ever done one of these before? - No, but it looks like fun, huh, man? 928 00:57:40,240 --> 00:57:41,449 Yeah. Real fun. 929 00:57:41,574 --> 00:57:43,199 All right, here, make sure you get a good shot. 930 00:57:43,323 --> 00:57:45,697 Wait, I thought you didn't want to send Gina any more videos. 931 00:57:45,822 --> 00:57:48,030 I changed my mind, all right? Wait till she sees this one. 932 00:57:48,155 --> 00:57:50,113 - Nice! - Kev, come on. 933 00:57:50,196 --> 00:57:53,112 What's happening? You don't have to do this. 934 00:57:53,820 --> 00:57:56,278 Yeah, I do, Morris, all right? And you should lighten up and do one, too. 935 00:57:56,361 --> 00:57:58,194 Yeah, fuck nugget. 936 00:57:58,319 --> 00:58:01,026 Me? No way. That's a bad idea. 937 00:58:01,151 --> 00:58:04,275 - I'm already on thin ice with the Dean. - Whatever! 938 00:58:05,525 --> 00:58:09,941 You know what? I think I'm gonna go and find something non-alcoholic to drink. 939 00:58:10,024 --> 00:58:11,148 You guys have fun puking on yourselves. 940 00:58:11,273 --> 00:58:14,606 Okay. We will, buddy. I love you! Call me later. Be safe. 941 00:58:14,689 --> 00:58:18,104 - All right, whatever. Let's do this thing! - All right. 942 00:58:18,188 --> 00:58:21,103 Yeah. Be careful with him, guys. He's fragile. 943 00:58:21,187 --> 00:58:23,478 Bitches spit, Kev. Bitches spit. 944 00:58:35,224 --> 00:58:38,473 - Hey, is there alcohol in there? - In the punch? 945 00:58:40,681 --> 00:58:43,306 No, not at all. 946 00:58:43,430 --> 00:58:47,888 In fact, this is non-alcoholic for our designated drivers. 947 00:58:49,304 --> 00:58:52,595 - Really? - Big old Bearcat wouldn't lie to you. 948 00:58:53,419 --> 00:58:56,752 After last night, I feel like we bonded. 949 00:58:55,535 --> 00:58:59,742 In fact, if you don't believe me, have a taste. 950 00:59:02,774 --> 00:59:04,607 Hey, can I have some punch? 951 00:59:05,033 --> 00:59:07,282 Hey, safety first. 952 00:59:07,865 --> 00:59:10,114 - Another designated driver. - Thank you. 953 00:59:13,080 --> 00:59:18,703 - Wow! It's pretty good. - Drink up, buddy. You look thirsty. 954 00:59:18,828 --> 00:59:21,827 Thanks, Bearcat. You're all right. 955 00:59:21,952 --> 00:59:24,701 Listen to me. If anybody, 956 00:59:24,826 --> 00:59:29,242 and I mean anybody, fucks with you tonight, find me. 957 00:59:29,366 --> 00:59:30,825 I got your front. 958 00:59:30,949 --> 00:59:34,240 - Don't you mean "back"? - If that's how you want it. 959 00:59:35,449 --> 00:59:38,239 If you feel something moving in your pants, don't fight it! 960 00:59:39,322 --> 00:59:40,780 Who's fucking on my floor? 961 00:59:45,279 --> 00:59:47,986 - Heather! - I know you! 962 00:59:48,069 --> 00:59:50,360 GIRL: Hey, Teague, who's the blonde? 963 00:59:51,194 --> 00:59:55,234 Hey! Kendall! I'm glad you made it. Let me get you girls some beers. 964 00:59:55,359 --> 00:59:57,650 No, thanks, Teague. Not now. 965 00:59:57,734 --> 01:00:01,940 If you're looking for who I think you're looking for, don't bother. 966 01:00:02,065 --> 01:00:04,814 He's a loser, him and his little friends. 967 01:00:05,231 --> 01:00:08,855 Are you really that jealous? 968 01:00:09,980 --> 01:00:13,396 You had your chance, Teague, and thank God you blew it. 969 01:00:26,035 --> 01:00:28,077 (ROCK MUSIC PLAYING) 970 01:00:30,867 --> 01:00:33,325 - Yeah! - I wanna drink! I wanna drink! 971 01:00:34,325 --> 01:00:37,699 - Fuck, yeah! - You are so awesome! 972 01:00:37,824 --> 01:00:39,824 - Verne! - Verne! Hey, Verne! 973 01:00:39,948 --> 01:00:42,864 - Fuck you, prick! - I love you, too! 974 01:00:42,947 --> 01:00:45,446 - Hey, man, did you get that one? - Dude, you fucking drained the thing! 975 01:00:45,530 --> 01:00:49,404 - Holy shit. Oh, hey, hey! Look, look! - Ladies! 976 01:00:49,529 --> 01:00:51,861 Hey, Kendall! Kendall, hey! 977 01:00:51,945 --> 01:00:53,194 What's up, ladies? 978 01:00:53,319 --> 01:00:54,652 We were hoping you guys would show up. 979 01:00:54,735 --> 01:00:58,110 Yeah, we waited at the bar tonight for, like, two hours. 980 01:00:58,193 --> 01:00:59,776 Yeah. Way to blow us off. 981 01:00:59,860 --> 01:01:03,816 Amy, girl, you know I'd never blow you off. 982 01:01:03,941 --> 01:01:08,315 Especially last night, you know, after the lesbian thing. 983 01:01:08,398 --> 01:01:11,064 Hey, hey, look, the bouncer wouldn't let us in, 'cause our IDs sucked. 984 01:01:11,189 --> 01:01:13,146 We got in just fine, and we don't even have ID. 985 01:01:13,272 --> 01:01:17,312 Yeah, but, see, you guys got tits, and those things are like gold. 986 01:01:18,062 --> 01:01:20,645 Hey, but you know what? You know what we're gonna do? 987 01:01:20,727 --> 01:01:25,102 Let us make it up to you, okay, 'cause you still need those beers, right? 988 01:01:25,227 --> 01:01:28,351 - I think you've had plenty. - Me? Come on! Please! 989 01:01:30,267 --> 01:01:32,266 I'm just getting started. 990 01:01:34,015 --> 01:01:36,015 All right, well, I'm gonna get you those beers. 991 01:01:36,139 --> 01:01:37,139 We're gonna get you the beers. 992 01:01:37,223 --> 01:01:39,181 - So don't move. - Let's go! 993 01:01:39,639 --> 01:01:42,555 - Excuse me, boobies! Look out! - Wait. Where's Morris? 994 01:01:48,011 --> 01:01:49,261 (HORN HONKING) 995 01:01:50,010 --> 01:01:51,593 - Cocksucking motherfucker! - Fuck you! 996 01:01:51,677 --> 01:01:54,135 Come on back and fight like a man! 997 01:01:57,134 --> 01:01:58,925 MAN: (SINGING) So, let's go 998 01:01:59,134 --> 01:02:01,007 And get wasted 999 01:02:01,966 --> 01:02:04,382 Let's go Let's go 1000 01:02:04,465 --> 01:02:07,005 And get high 1001 01:02:07,131 --> 01:02:08,630 Let's go 1002 01:02:10,713 --> 01:02:12,213 (EXCLAIMS) 1003 01:02:12,296 --> 01:02:14,711 Look who's here! Little high school friends. 1004 01:02:14,795 --> 01:02:17,961 Hey, come on, don't be a dick, Teague. Fill us up. 1005 01:02:18,503 --> 01:02:20,710 - What'd you say? - I said fill us up, fucktard. 1006 01:02:20,794 --> 01:02:22,335 Or is that too complicated for your small... 1007 01:02:22,459 --> 01:02:25,583 Hey, hey! Hey, hey! He meant that in the nicest way possible. 1008 01:02:25,708 --> 01:02:28,958 Stop being an asshole, Teague, and give them our beer. 1009 01:02:29,083 --> 01:02:32,915 So you want some beer for your ladies? 1010 01:02:34,206 --> 01:02:35,497 All right. 1011 01:02:37,288 --> 01:02:41,579 You know what? You guys put up with a lot of shit these past couple of days, 1012 01:02:41,703 --> 01:02:43,953 and you deserve this beer. 1013 01:02:45,078 --> 01:02:47,119 In fact, hold on. 1014 01:02:48,952 --> 01:02:49,952 (GROANS) 1015 01:02:51,159 --> 01:02:53,617 Hey, everybody, listen up! I've got a quick announcement to make! 1016 01:02:53,742 --> 01:02:57,533 - Lay off, Teague. - Trust me, Kendall. You're gonna love this. 1017 01:02:58,324 --> 01:03:02,781 See these guys right here? These guys are pre-frosh. 1018 01:03:02,906 --> 01:03:04,072 (CROWD BOOING) 1019 01:03:04,364 --> 01:03:08,071 - That's right! They're high school kids! - High school? 1020 01:03:08,154 --> 01:03:09,196 High school? 1021 01:03:09,279 --> 01:03:14,361 All right, come on now, once upon a time we were high school kids, too. 1022 01:03:15,361 --> 01:03:17,652 - No way! - Come on. 1023 01:03:17,777 --> 01:03:18,734 Grow up! 1024 01:03:18,859 --> 01:03:20,567 All right, shut up! 1025 01:03:21,192 --> 01:03:22,900 These guys are cool. 1026 01:03:23,316 --> 01:03:26,482 They're good guys who want a beer and a good time. 1027 01:03:27,524 --> 01:03:29,107 Give them one. 1028 01:03:29,232 --> 01:03:31,690 Here it is. Your beer. 1029 01:03:42,019 --> 01:03:46,227 What the fuck? Stop peeing on me! What are you doing? 1030 01:03:46,310 --> 01:03:48,059 Would you fucking stop peeing on me, you little shit? 1031 01:03:48,184 --> 01:03:52,849 Say what? Nobody talks to my bear kitten like that! 1032 01:03:52,933 --> 01:03:55,932 What me and him got, you'll never understand. 1033 01:03:56,057 --> 01:03:57,390 Pick me up, bitch! 1034 01:03:57,473 --> 01:03:59,681 Stop calling me bitch! This is my frat. You're embarrassing me. 1035 01:03:59,764 --> 01:04:01,180 And now let's get fucked up! 1036 01:04:01,263 --> 01:04:02,555 (CROWD CHEERING) 1037 01:04:10,886 --> 01:04:13,344 - Kendall, wait! - Nice one. 1038 01:04:18,425 --> 01:04:21,383 - Oh, my word, that was fun. - (LAUGHING) That's not dancing. 1039 01:04:21,508 --> 01:04:22,591 (CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING) 1040 01:04:22,715 --> 01:04:24,298 They can't dance. 1041 01:04:25,048 --> 01:04:26,506 Jim! Look out! 1042 01:04:28,714 --> 01:04:33,213 - Sweet Jesus! That was close! - Hi! Dean Chandler! 1043 01:04:33,338 --> 01:04:35,712 Just the guy I wanted to talk to. 1044 01:04:38,586 --> 01:04:41,502 CHANDLER: Oh, my God! 1045 01:04:50,540 --> 01:04:51,998 (ALL URINATING) 1046 01:04:52,123 --> 01:04:53,790 I'm so dead. 1047 01:04:53,915 --> 01:04:58,121 Yeah, well, at least you didn't get beer poured on you by about 300 people. 1048 01:04:58,247 --> 01:04:59,996 Yeah, Kendall looked pretty pissed back there, huh? 1049 01:05:00,080 --> 01:05:01,080 Pissed? 1050 01:05:01,204 --> 01:05:05,827 Dude, it looked like she was gonna shoot fucking daggers out of her eyeballs. 1051 01:05:08,661 --> 01:05:10,868 Kev? Kev! Where you going? 1052 01:05:10,952 --> 01:05:13,784 I'm gonna go apologize. You coming with me? 1053 01:05:26,072 --> 01:05:30,071 Hey! Shut the fuck up! This is my favorite part! Watch this shit! 1054 01:05:40,692 --> 01:05:41,984 MAN: Dude. 1055 01:05:43,650 --> 01:05:45,608 BEARCAT: There's Goose! There's Goose! 1056 01:05:45,733 --> 01:05:46,941 (LAUGHING) 1057 01:05:47,233 --> 01:05:49,731 Shit, that's funny! Hey, play that shit again! 1058 01:05:49,815 --> 01:05:51,356 Play it in slow-mo! 1059 01:05:51,481 --> 01:05:54,939 - You guys do this shit for fun? - All day, every day. 1060 01:05:55,064 --> 01:05:58,229 - Butch up, Goose! Stop being a pussy! - Yeah! 1061 01:06:01,394 --> 01:06:05,560 I just saw those high school kids heading over to the sorority house. 1062 01:06:06,143 --> 01:06:07,518 Just saying. 1063 01:06:12,391 --> 01:06:13,350 No way. 1064 01:06:13,433 --> 01:06:14,599 (KNOCKING ON WINDOW) 1065 01:06:16,973 --> 01:06:18,306 What? 1066 01:06:18,389 --> 01:06:22,347 - Can I talk to you alone for a minute? - Why? So you can tell me more lies? 1067 01:06:22,472 --> 01:06:24,638 - No, thanks. - Hey! Wait! 1068 01:06:27,970 --> 01:06:31,677 - Come on, I leave tomorrow. - You know, I thought you were different. 1069 01:06:31,803 --> 01:06:35,426 But you're just like the rest of them. Have a nice drive. 1070 01:06:38,051 --> 01:06:39,550 College blows! 1071 01:06:41,133 --> 01:06:43,299 You think I'll ever see Heather again? 1072 01:06:43,382 --> 01:06:46,381 Probably not, Morris. I pretty much blew it for all of us. 1073 01:06:46,465 --> 01:06:48,464 So that was my last shot to score with Amy. 1074 01:06:48,547 --> 01:06:50,630 All I wanna do is bang one college chick this weekend. 1075 01:06:50,713 --> 01:06:52,797 Is that so much to ask? 1076 01:06:52,880 --> 01:06:54,379 What the hell? 1077 01:06:57,128 --> 01:06:59,087 MORRIS: My glasses! My glasses! 1078 01:07:01,877 --> 01:07:04,751 Get them in the van! Get them in. 1079 01:07:05,334 --> 01:07:06,709 Get them in. 1080 01:07:17,206 --> 01:07:20,663 - TEAGUE: You pukes are worthless. - Worthless! 1081 01:07:20,788 --> 01:07:24,578 Nothing but a bunch of goddamn high school kids! 1082 01:07:24,703 --> 01:07:27,286 Goddamn high school kids! 1083 01:07:32,160 --> 01:07:36,450 I can't believe we're even out here wasting our time on you. 1084 01:07:36,533 --> 01:07:39,324 Wasting our motherfucking time! 1085 01:07:39,449 --> 01:07:42,157 Dude, what's with the repeating? It's fucking killing me. 1086 01:07:42,281 --> 01:07:46,655 Sorry! It's stupid. Can I get a hug? 1087 01:07:49,197 --> 01:07:52,570 Just go stand over there and look fucking mean. 1088 01:07:52,695 --> 01:07:53,737 Do the growl thing. 1089 01:07:54,361 --> 01:07:58,153 Come on, man, I'll jeeper creeper these motherfuckers. Hug me. 1090 01:07:59,985 --> 01:08:01,193 (BARKING) 1091 01:08:08,691 --> 01:08:13,148 We got beer to drink. So it's been fun, kind of. 1092 01:08:14,856 --> 01:08:16,647 By the way, 1093 01:08:16,771 --> 01:08:20,979 have you guys ever seen a pig stampede before? 1094 01:08:21,104 --> 01:08:23,978 - Fucked up. Pig stampede. - Pig stampede! 1095 01:08:24,061 --> 01:08:26,269 - ALL: Pig stampede! Pig stampede! - Pig stampede! Pig stampede! 1096 01:08:26,352 --> 01:08:28,977 - Pig stampede! Pig stampede! - Pig stampede! Pig stampede! 1097 01:08:29,101 --> 01:08:32,225 - Pig stampede! Pig stampede! - Pig stampede! Pig stampede! 1098 01:08:32,350 --> 01:08:34,016 (PIGS SQUEALING) 1099 01:08:41,681 --> 01:08:44,930 BEARCAT: Get out of the front seat, bitch! I called shotgun! 1100 01:08:48,470 --> 01:08:49,762 (GUN FIRES) 1101 01:08:49,970 --> 01:08:51,719 Shit! Run! 1102 01:08:55,010 --> 01:08:56,135 (GROANING) 1103 01:09:00,842 --> 01:09:03,715 Keep running, you little sicko pig fuckers! 1104 01:09:04,425 --> 01:09:05,757 (GUN FIRES) 1105 01:09:09,172 --> 01:09:10,214 This sucks. 1106 01:09:10,339 --> 01:09:13,754 Yeah, thanks for stating the obvious, Carter. 1107 01:09:13,838 --> 01:09:18,628 You know, I never thought I'd say this, but I think I actually miss high school. 1108 01:09:20,752 --> 01:09:22,585 - What, Kevin? - Nothing. Forget it. 1109 01:09:22,669 --> 01:09:24,502 Don't forget it. If you have something to say, fucking say it! 1110 01:09:24,626 --> 01:09:27,042 Okay, fine, you want it? Here it is. You're full of shit, Carter! 1111 01:09:27,167 --> 01:09:28,167 I'm full of shit? 1112 01:09:28,292 --> 01:09:30,500 Yeah! You're always talking such a big fucking game, man. 1113 01:09:30,625 --> 01:09:33,915 You know what? Newsflash! He's never even been laid. 1114 01:09:35,998 --> 01:09:41,288 - So, that's how it's gonna be, huh, Kevin? - No, no, no. Wait. You're still a virgin? 1115 01:09:41,372 --> 01:09:45,537 - (LAUGHING) Man! This is great. - Yeah, whatever, Morris! Shut up! 1116 01:09:45,662 --> 01:09:47,120 You know what, Kev? Stop dumping on us 1117 01:09:47,245 --> 01:09:49,244 'cause the weekend didn't turn out the way you thought it would! 1118 01:09:49,327 --> 01:09:51,035 Yeah, probably because I've been listening to you too much. 1119 01:09:51,160 --> 01:09:55,534 Yeah, 'cause it was my idea to try to prove Gina wrong and lie to Kendall! 1120 01:09:55,659 --> 01:09:58,449 - That was all you, man! - Guys, come on. Let's not fight. 1121 01:09:58,533 --> 01:10:00,949 You know what? Stay out of it, Morris! You're not part of this! 1122 01:10:01,032 --> 01:10:02,407 I'm not part of this? 1123 01:10:02,490 --> 01:10:04,490 This was supposed to be yours and my weekend here. 1124 01:10:04,573 --> 01:10:06,073 Dude, whatever. I didn't mean it like that. 1125 01:10:06,155 --> 01:10:08,030 No, but while we're comparing shitty weekends, 1126 01:10:08,155 --> 01:10:09,197 here's one for you. 1127 01:10:09,321 --> 01:10:11,946 My face got written on before my scholarship interview, 1128 01:10:12,071 --> 01:10:13,945 a pig just snacked on my nuts, 1129 01:10:14,070 --> 01:10:15,945 and, oh, yeah, I almost forgot about this one, 1130 01:10:16,070 --> 01:10:17,569 I puked on the Dean's car, 1131 01:10:17,695 --> 01:10:19,986 which pretty much means that I'm not getting my scholarship! 1132 01:10:20,110 --> 01:10:21,402 God, Morris! Ever since you got here 1133 01:10:21,485 --> 01:10:23,609 you whine, whine, whine about your fucking scholarship. 1134 01:10:23,734 --> 01:10:24,817 You don't even want to go here. 1135 01:10:24,942 --> 01:10:27,441 It's not about what I want! You know how my parents are! 1136 01:10:27,566 --> 01:10:29,941 Yeah, well, then grow some fucking balls and stand up to them. 1137 01:10:30,065 --> 01:10:31,440 It's not that easy. 1138 01:10:31,524 --> 01:10:33,773 Hey, man, what's next? They're gonna choose what job you take? 1139 01:10:33,897 --> 01:10:36,689 - What girl you marry? - Dude, lay off, Kev! 1140 01:10:37,522 --> 01:10:39,312 That's a first. You're sticking up for Morris, man? 1141 01:10:39,437 --> 01:10:42,312 - You bag on him more than anyone. - That's not true and you fucking know it! 1142 01:10:42,436 --> 01:10:43,603 Ha! 1143 01:10:44,561 --> 01:10:46,936 Okay, you know what, Morris? Fuck you! 1144 01:10:47,018 --> 01:10:49,518 That's the last time I ever have your fucking back! 1145 01:10:49,643 --> 01:10:54,016 You know what? Fuck you, too, Kevin, for dumping all your bullshit on us. 1146 01:10:57,766 --> 01:10:59,515 All right, fine, Morris. Yeah, walk away with him. 1147 01:10:59,640 --> 01:11:02,265 Why don't you hold his hand while you're at it? 1148 01:11:02,348 --> 01:11:06,388 - Fuck you, Kevin. - Dropping the F-bomb, big man. 1149 01:11:06,471 --> 01:11:08,595 What is that, the first time you ever used it? 1150 01:11:08,720 --> 01:11:10,720 I'm telling your parents! 1151 01:11:11,970 --> 01:11:13,053 Fuck! 1152 01:11:13,136 --> 01:11:15,386 MAN: (SINGING) We do not know 1153 01:11:18,842 --> 01:11:19,968 How things work 1154 01:11:19,968 --> 01:11:20,509 How things work 1155 01:11:23,633 --> 01:11:26,840 We do not know 1156 01:11:30,714 --> 01:11:33,089 Where you go 1157 01:11:38,711 --> 01:11:40,045 In the night 1158 01:11:42,794 --> 01:11:44,418 Through the door 1159 01:11:46,584 --> 01:11:50,708 Through the door that holds you 1160 01:11:54,457 --> 01:11:58,623 Through the door that holds you 1161 01:12:01,539 --> 01:12:03,538 Out of the blue 1162 01:12:10,619 --> 01:12:13,910 We do not know 1163 01:12:18,534 --> 01:12:22,533 The door that holds you 1164 01:12:25,448 --> 01:12:27,572 Silent as glue 1165 01:12:30,030 --> 01:12:32,321 We stand under it 1166 01:12:33,112 --> 01:12:35,529 But we don't understand it 1167 01:12:37,945 --> 01:12:40,027 The door that holds you 1168 01:12:45,317 --> 01:12:48,024 Silent as glue 1169 01:12:50,233 --> 01:12:55,481 And stars fall on 1170 01:12:58,813 --> 01:13:03,937 Stars fall on 1171 01:13:05,561 --> 01:13:08,393 Silent as glue 1172 01:13:28,596 --> 01:13:32,720 - Nice look. - This? Yeah, thanks. 1173 01:13:35,803 --> 01:13:36,968 So... 1174 01:13:41,759 --> 01:13:44,050 - Look, about what happened... - Don't even go there. 1175 01:13:44,133 --> 01:13:47,882 - Just let me explain. - I really don't want to hear it, Kevin. 1176 01:13:47,965 --> 01:13:49,839 I don't even know who you are. 1177 01:13:49,923 --> 01:13:52,381 Yeah, to be honest, I'm not even sure I know anymore. 1178 01:13:52,464 --> 01:13:55,005 Maybe it's time you figure that out. 1179 01:13:57,004 --> 01:14:01,878 You know, high school, college, it wouldn't have mattered to me. 1180 01:14:02,003 --> 01:14:04,252 Yeah, I know. It's so stupid. 1181 01:14:04,377 --> 01:14:08,417 You know, I came down here thinking I needed to change who I was. 1182 01:14:09,584 --> 01:14:11,667 Lying to you was just part of it. 1183 01:14:11,792 --> 01:14:14,374 I thought you were pretty great. Why would you want to change that? 1184 01:14:14,499 --> 01:14:15,956 I don't know. 1185 01:14:17,374 --> 01:14:19,331 You don't know? 1186 01:14:19,414 --> 01:14:22,913 Like, I mean, I kind of liked who I was, or I am. 1187 01:14:23,038 --> 01:14:26,204 You know, a little uptight at times, responsible. 1188 01:14:30,495 --> 01:14:33,327 God, I really screwed up this weekend. 1189 01:14:33,410 --> 01:14:35,910 You know, now Morris and Carter are pissed at each other. 1190 01:14:36,034 --> 01:14:37,992 They're both pissed at me. 1191 01:14:40,116 --> 01:14:44,074 You just seem like the kind of person who doesn't make mistakes. 1192 01:14:44,448 --> 01:14:45,490 Ha! 1193 01:14:47,572 --> 01:14:50,572 A couple weeks ago... Brace yourself. 1194 01:14:53,029 --> 01:14:54,946 I hooked up with Teague. 1195 01:14:55,071 --> 01:14:57,653 - Huge mistake. - Yeah, he kinda told me. 1196 01:14:59,694 --> 01:15:02,027 Why not? He told the whole campus. 1197 01:15:04,609 --> 01:15:07,400 Why'd you do it? I mean, with a guy like Teague? 1198 01:15:07,525 --> 01:15:10,149 - He is so... - For all the wrong reasons. 1199 01:15:11,899 --> 01:15:14,773 He was good-looking. He made me feel special, 1200 01:15:16,522 --> 01:15:18,980 and since he was a really good liar, 1201 01:15:19,104 --> 01:15:24,770 he made believe that it was more than just a one-night thing. 1202 01:15:27,519 --> 01:15:29,685 - Ouch. - Yeah. 1203 01:15:31,093 --> 01:15:34,343 It was kind of why I freaked out tonight. 1204 01:15:36,467 --> 01:15:41,924 I found out that you lied and I assumed that you were just like Teague. 1205 01:15:42,049 --> 01:15:45,173 Oh, God, please, look, I'm nothing like that guy. 1206 01:15:47,380 --> 01:15:49,796 I'm really sorry about everything. 1207 01:15:52,046 --> 01:15:54,502 Is this the real Kevin talking? 1208 01:15:54,586 --> 01:15:57,919 Or is this the new and improved college Kevin talking? 1209 01:15:58,044 --> 01:15:59,168 No, this is the real me, 1210 01:15:59,251 --> 01:16:02,834 the uptight, responsible, un-fun high school one. 1211 01:16:05,083 --> 01:16:08,249 Good. Apology accepted then. 1212 01:16:12,414 --> 01:16:15,622 All right, well, I gotta go find Carter and Morris. 1213 01:16:17,121 --> 01:16:21,370 Before you go, can I please give you some clothes? 1214 01:16:25,535 --> 01:16:29,367 - Morris? Morris, wake up! - Kevin? 1215 01:16:31,575 --> 01:16:34,033 - What's with the... - Where's Carter? 1216 01:16:40,448 --> 01:16:44,946 Look, you guys. I've been thinking all night. I just want to say I'm sorry 1217 01:16:45,905 --> 01:16:47,654 about everything. 1218 01:16:47,737 --> 01:16:50,819 - You said some harsh things, man. - Yeah, I know. 1219 01:16:51,903 --> 01:16:55,985 I've realized a lot about myself this weekend, and you guys. 1220 01:16:56,110 --> 01:16:57,984 I didn't mean what I said. 1221 01:16:58,067 --> 01:17:00,650 I've just been so hung up on what Gina told me 1222 01:17:00,734 --> 01:17:05,191 that I haven't even stopped to think that, you know, maybe she was wrong. 1223 01:17:06,899 --> 01:17:07,898 You guys are my best friends. 1224 01:17:08,023 --> 01:17:11,688 I'm not gonna let some stupid weekend at college ruin that. 1225 01:17:13,396 --> 01:17:17,187 Whatever, man. It's cool. I like the boring Kevin more anyway. 1226 01:17:17,479 --> 01:17:19,436 Thanks, Carter. I think. 1227 01:17:22,894 --> 01:17:24,185 Morris? 1228 01:17:25,851 --> 01:17:30,224 We all said some stuff, you know? No biggie. I'm over it. 1229 01:17:31,183 --> 01:17:34,098 Sorry I, like, freaked out and lost my shit. 1230 01:17:40,430 --> 01:17:41,804 You guys, 1231 01:17:43,888 --> 01:17:46,261 that was so gay. 1232 01:17:46,386 --> 01:17:49,385 That was like the third gayest thing we've done this weekend. 1233 01:17:49,510 --> 01:17:52,634 - It's getting out of hand. - All right, look. Does this mean we're cool? 1234 01:17:52,718 --> 01:17:55,134 Yeah, man. For sure. 1235 01:17:55,217 --> 01:17:58,216 Okay! So now that we're done arguing like a bunch of chicks, 1236 01:17:58,300 --> 01:18:02,673 - what the hell are we doing out here? - Go ahead and look for yourselves. 1237 01:18:06,797 --> 01:18:09,005 - Is that all our stuff? - Yeah. 1238 01:18:09,088 --> 01:18:13,420 - They even threw in all our rubbers. - Those taint-sucking ball junkies. 1239 01:18:14,836 --> 01:18:15,878 Yep. 1240 01:18:33,372 --> 01:18:35,997 - Can we go home now? - No. Not yet. 1241 01:18:36,122 --> 01:18:39,329 - Dude, why the fuck would we stay? - The weekend's over, Kevin. 1242 01:18:39,454 --> 01:18:41,037 It's pretty clear we're not wanted here anymore. 1243 01:18:41,162 --> 01:18:42,995 Come on, you guys. We've got to stand up for ourselves. 1244 01:18:43,120 --> 01:18:45,286 No, we don't. We need to go home. 1245 01:18:45,369 --> 01:18:46,660 Come on, man. After all the shit we've been through? 1246 01:18:46,785 --> 01:18:49,492 We can't leave like this, Morris. 1247 01:18:49,576 --> 01:18:52,992 Besides, I can't stand up to these fraternity assholes on my own. 1248 01:18:53,075 --> 01:18:57,990 All right, fuck it! If I'm not gonna get laid, I might as well get revenge, right? 1249 01:19:01,531 --> 01:19:04,530 Come on, Morris. We can't do this without you. 1250 01:19:06,113 --> 01:19:09,570 Come on, man. Just think about it. Who wrote "hairy balls" on your face? 1251 01:19:09,695 --> 01:19:11,194 - Fraternity guys. - Yeah. 1252 01:19:11,320 --> 01:19:13,694 Who made you wash their car, drink out of some dude's belly button 1253 01:19:13,819 --> 01:19:15,319 and puke all over the Dean's car? 1254 01:19:15,444 --> 01:19:16,444 CARTER: Who stripped you naked 1255 01:19:16,568 --> 01:19:18,693 and made you feel like a little bitch all weekend long? 1256 01:19:18,817 --> 01:19:22,483 - Fraternity guys! - Yeah, that's right, the fraternity guys. 1257 01:19:22,567 --> 01:19:23,983 Look, man, you want to stand up to your parents? 1258 01:19:24,108 --> 01:19:27,273 Why don't you start by taking a stand here first? 1259 01:19:27,773 --> 01:19:30,273 Let's take those motherfuckers down. 1260 01:19:47,976 --> 01:19:49,850 Fuck! 1261 01:19:57,889 --> 01:20:00,306 One, two. 1262 01:20:02,138 --> 01:20:04,929 - Four, five... - Dude, open the door! 1263 01:21:21,823 --> 01:21:23,281 Get over here! 1264 01:21:36,610 --> 01:21:37,776 (GROANING) 1265 01:21:47,149 --> 01:21:50,730 Five, four, three, two... 1266 01:21:51,897 --> 01:21:53,021 (SHOUTING) 1267 01:21:56,146 --> 01:22:00,270 - Dude, are you sure this is going to work? - Trust me. It's physics. 1268 01:22:26,054 --> 01:22:27,387 Fuck. 1269 01:22:44,507 --> 01:22:46,756 - What the fuck? - Nothing's happening. 1270 01:22:46,881 --> 01:22:48,339 Maybe the matches blew out. 1271 01:22:50,130 --> 01:22:51,463 (BEEPING) 1272 01:22:51,963 --> 01:22:53,421 (ALARM RINGING) 1273 01:23:07,166 --> 01:23:08,499 What the... 1274 01:23:12,165 --> 01:23:14,248 Shit! Fuck! 1275 01:23:18,372 --> 01:23:19,871 What the fuck? 1276 01:23:37,408 --> 01:23:38,740 Fucking pig! 1277 01:23:40,115 --> 01:23:41,615 Fucking shit! 1278 01:23:44,905 --> 01:23:46,363 (PIG SQUEALING) 1279 01:23:48,904 --> 01:23:50,112 Oh, shit! 1280 01:23:53,611 --> 01:23:57,068 - What the fuck is happening? - There's pigs everywhere! 1281 01:24:02,525 --> 01:24:04,774 Fuck me! God damn it! 1282 01:24:08,023 --> 01:24:09,523 What the fuck? 1283 01:24:11,439 --> 01:24:12,730 It's beer! 1284 01:24:14,605 --> 01:24:16,521 It's fucking beer, man! 1285 01:24:28,309 --> 01:24:30,433 (SIRENS BLARING) 1286 01:24:36,890 --> 01:24:40,056 Hey, you guys, you got to come outside! 1287 01:24:40,181 --> 01:24:43,180 I think the Beta Chi House is on fire or something. 1288 01:25:04,590 --> 01:25:06,048 Fuck you, pig! 1289 01:25:10,755 --> 01:25:12,547 Nice hair cut, buddy! 1290 01:25:16,420 --> 01:25:18,003 - Bearcat. - Wait! 1291 01:25:21,169 --> 01:25:24,543 Wait! Can I flush first, guys? Come on! 1292 01:25:24,626 --> 01:25:27,750 You boys are in a world of shit now. Disturbing the peace, 1293 01:25:27,875 --> 01:25:30,208 destruction of property, stealing farm animals! 1294 01:25:30,291 --> 01:25:33,457 What the hell are you talking about? It wasn't us! 1295 01:25:35,665 --> 01:25:40,288 - It was those fuckers right there! - Officer, we don't even go here. 1296 01:25:40,413 --> 01:25:42,412 No. We're just a bunch of high school kids. 1297 01:25:42,538 --> 01:25:45,994 You know, Officer, frankly, I'm appalled at the behavior on this campus. 1298 01:25:46,119 --> 01:25:48,203 Motherfuckers! 1299 01:25:48,327 --> 01:25:49,661 Fuck you! 1300 01:25:49,744 --> 01:25:53,660 Careful there, buddy. You've got a little cut from a straight razor on your nipple. 1301 01:25:53,742 --> 01:25:55,325 Wait, wait! Wait! 1302 01:25:57,242 --> 01:25:59,116 - Where's my car? - MAN: Plastic pussy stole it! 1303 01:25:59,241 --> 01:26:00,615 Where's my fucking car? 1304 01:26:07,613 --> 01:26:09,530 This was donated by a group of our alumni. 1305 01:26:09,655 --> 01:26:12,278 This has made a very welcome addition to our campus. 1306 01:26:12,403 --> 01:26:15,986 And I'm sure that your child will embrace their studies... 1307 01:26:16,111 --> 01:26:19,860 Why don't we go ahead, guys? Just follow me. Come on, guys. 1308 01:26:25,942 --> 01:26:28,482 CARTER: So, wait. You're in high school? 1309 01:26:28,565 --> 01:26:31,981 AMY: Yeah. I just came here to visit for the weekend, like you guys. 1310 01:26:32,065 --> 01:26:36,397 - But you even drink like a college girl. - Really? Thanks. 1311 01:26:38,646 --> 01:26:43,811 - So I guess this is it, huh? - Well, it doesn't have to be. 1312 01:26:46,352 --> 01:26:47,643 Carter! 1313 01:26:50,226 --> 01:26:53,183 Spank me, tiger! Yeah! 1314 01:27:00,181 --> 01:27:03,347 - I guess I better... - Morris. 1315 01:27:06,763 --> 01:27:09,678 Think you're gonna go here next year? 1316 01:27:09,804 --> 01:27:13,011 After this weekend, I kind of feel like I already do. 1317 01:27:13,135 --> 01:27:16,551 Plus, I already have a girlfriend lined up, so... 1318 01:27:16,677 --> 01:27:18,634 Yeah? And who's that? 1319 01:27:20,676 --> 01:27:24,257 Someone I met. She plays a mean game of quarters. 1320 01:27:25,840 --> 01:27:30,255 So I guess that means I'll be getting my photography lessons after all. 1321 01:27:50,416 --> 01:27:53,832 - So that's everything. - I guess we should get on the road. 1322 01:27:53,915 --> 01:27:56,123 Wait. You know what? Hang on. 1323 01:28:05,578 --> 01:28:07,827 All right, guys. Let's go home. 1324 01:28:21,574 --> 01:28:23,448 Here comes trouble. 1325 01:28:23,531 --> 01:28:27,280 - Hey, Kevin. - Hey, Gina. 1326 01:28:27,364 --> 01:28:29,696 So I got your video message. 1327 01:28:30,279 --> 01:28:32,279 Looks like you guys had a pretty crazy weekend. 1328 01:28:32,404 --> 01:28:33,737 Hell, yeah! 1329 01:28:35,736 --> 01:28:37,486 - Yeah! - Breath mint. 1330 01:28:37,736 --> 01:28:39,777 (GIGGLING) 1331 01:28:39,860 --> 01:28:45,275 Anyway, well, it kind of made me think a lot 1332 01:28:45,359 --> 01:28:49,233 about you and me and, you know, us. 1333 01:28:50,981 --> 01:28:53,481 Why don't we just forget this whole break-up thing ever happened? 1334 01:28:53,564 --> 01:28:55,147 What do you say? 1335 01:28:56,939 --> 01:28:58,230 Well... 1336 01:29:01,520 --> 01:29:02,728 You know, 1337 01:29:04,645 --> 01:29:06,269 I don't think so. 1338 01:29:08,227 --> 01:29:11,392 - What? - Yeah, you see, I've moved on. 1339 01:29:13,350 --> 01:29:17,432 Moved on? We've only been broken up for, like, three days. 1340 01:29:17,557 --> 01:29:20,473 Yeah, well, a lot can happen in three days. 1341 01:29:20,848 --> 01:29:27,013 And, Gina, that guy you saw? Yeah, that's not really me. 1342 01:29:28,221 --> 01:29:30,553 Well, see you around. 1343 01:29:30,678 --> 01:29:33,844 And get a boob job, Gina. Lift. 1344 01:29:35,594 --> 01:29:39,384 Kevin! Wait! Seriously! 1345 01:29:44,133 --> 01:29:46,965 So what do you guys want to do next weekend? 1346 01:29:47,049 --> 01:29:50,048 Next weekend? Aren't you grounded for, like, the next six months? 1347 01:29:50,131 --> 01:29:53,130 Fuck that! No problem. I can just sneak out. 1348 01:29:54,796 --> 01:29:58,295 You know, I've got a cousin that goes to U of I. 1349 01:30:14,166 --> 01:30:17,207 I'll pay you $5 a sniff, either one of your farts. 1350 01:30:17,331 --> 01:30:20,955 I just want to cherish your gaseous fumes. 1351 01:30:21,080 --> 01:30:22,996 It can be a birthday present. My birthday's coming up! 1352 01:30:23,413 --> 01:30:25,162 Yeah! Lost my shoe. 1353 01:30:25,287 --> 01:30:26,745 (BOYS LAUGHING) 1354 01:30:27,953 --> 01:30:29,827 Dude, you gotta see the shots I got from last night's game. 1355 01:30:29,952 --> 01:30:32,368 I got one where Stoloff is mid-air right over the inset... 1356 01:30:32,494 --> 01:30:35,201 Insectercide? Whatever the hell... What the... 1357 01:30:35,284 --> 01:30:36,617 (STAMMERING) 1358 01:30:37,242 --> 01:30:40,991 Dean Chandler has denied our petition, and we're still on probation. 1359 01:30:41,116 --> 01:30:42,616 - Shit. - Yeah. 1360 01:30:42,782 --> 01:30:44,074 WOMAN: Okay, cut! 1361 01:30:44,157 --> 01:30:45,323 (ALL LAUGHING) 1362 01:30:46,490 --> 01:30:50,030 Our camping trips? Our... The school... 1363 01:30:50,113 --> 01:30:52,279 Thing that was awesome that we did together. Remember that? 1364 01:30:52,404 --> 01:30:54,862 It was you and me. What's the line? 1365 01:30:57,153 --> 01:31:00,610 Looks like my years of hard work have finally paid off! 1366 01:31:02,485 --> 01:31:03,443 KEVIN: What's the matter, Morris? 1367 01:31:03,526 --> 01:31:05,900 - I'm sorry. - It's okay. 1368 01:31:05,983 --> 01:31:09,649 I've taken some whip-its, you know, the cracker shit. 1369 01:31:10,857 --> 01:31:12,106 (ALL LAUGHING) 1370 01:31:13,564 --> 01:31:15,814 Whatever, man. You guys are lightweights. I don't feel shit. 1371 01:31:15,938 --> 01:31:20,313 - Mom's a lightweight. - Here... Fuck you, dude! 1372 01:31:21,854 --> 01:31:23,936 Well, it doesn't have to be. 1373 01:31:25,478 --> 01:31:26,894 (CREW LAUGHING) 1374 01:31:28,852 --> 01:31:30,143 Is that our stuff? 1375 01:31:30,268 --> 01:31:33,100 Yeah. They even threw all our rubbers in. 1376 01:31:33,933 --> 01:31:36,350 Those scrotum-eating baby rapers. 1377 01:31:38,474 --> 01:31:40,848 Those taint-sucking ball junkies. 1378 01:31:43,348 --> 01:31:44,638 (ALL LAUGHING) 1379 01:31:46,472 --> 01:31:48,929 Those jizz-guzzling monkey fuckers. 1380 01:31:53,969 --> 01:31:56,552 You sucked in Austin Powers. Mike Myers carried you. 1381 01:31:56,635 --> 01:31:58,634 You didn't even say nothing, bitch. 1382 01:31:58,760 --> 01:32:01,343 Dude, you're doing it wrong, anyway. You gotta flip it, bitch. 1383 01:32:01,467 --> 01:32:02,924 Fucking beat you... 1384 01:32:03,008 --> 01:32:04,549 (CREW CHEERING) 1385 01:32:05,883 --> 01:32:08,798 Dude, this is so much better than the brochure. 1386 01:32:08,923 --> 01:32:10,714 I know, man. I've got a good feeling about this. 1387 01:32:10,797 --> 01:32:15,172 - I'm sorry, K.B. just said he had a boner. - He said he had a boner. 1388 01:32:15,254 --> 01:32:16,588 WOMAN: Can we cut? Cut. 1389 01:32:17,171 --> 01:32:19,253 I've got to ask you a favor. 1390 01:32:20,170 --> 01:32:21,753 You know that book about the mice 1391 01:32:21,878 --> 01:32:25,044 that Miss Dangle is asking everybody to read? 1392 01:32:25,627 --> 01:32:28,209 - That's way too much cereal. - MAN: Swallow. 1393 01:32:30,126 --> 01:32:32,625 Twin powers, activate! 1394 01:32:33,874 --> 01:32:38,123 Form of a screaming... Screaming manimal! 1395 01:32:38,248 --> 01:32:39,747 (SCREAMING) 1396 01:32:42,413 --> 01:32:46,496 Bearcat's gay and he wants to do me 1397 01:32:47,662 --> 01:32:51,828 I'm gonna punch his face And then he'll sue me 1398 01:32:53,119 --> 01:32:56,951 I'm going home with pussy on my pee-pee 1399 01:32:58,158 --> 01:33:04,907 Gonna tell my friends That college is the shitty, yeah 1400 01:33:06,448 --> 01:33:07,906 Eat that shit 1401 01:33:07,989 --> 01:33:09,239 WOMAN: And cut! 1402 01:33:10,322 --> 01:33:11,571 (CREW CHEERING) 1403 01:34:14,053 --> 01:34:15,095 Subtitles by LeapinLar 1404 01:34:16,000 --> 01:34:19,099 Best watched using Open Subtitles MKV Player 111336