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Captioning Provided By:
MTV NETWORKS
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00:00:11,620 --> 00:00:12,862
ARE YA READY, KIDS?Kids: AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN.
3
00:00:13,034 --> 00:00:14,758
I CAN'T HEARYOU.
4
00:00:14,965 --> 00:00:16,344
Kids: [SHOUTING]
AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN.
5
00:00:16,551 --> 00:00:19,517
♪ OHH... ♪
6
00:00:19,724 --> 00:00:21,551
♪ WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE
UNDER THE SEA? ♪
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00:00:21,758 --> 00:00:23,896
Kids: ♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ♪
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00:00:24,068 --> 00:00:25,655
Captain: ♪ ABSORBENT AND YELLOW
AND POROUS IS HE ♪
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00:00:25,862 --> 00:00:28,034
Kids: ♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ♪
10
00:00:28,241 --> 00:00:29,827
Captain: ♪ IF NAUTICAL NONSENSE
BE SOMETHIN' YOU WISH ♪
11
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:32,137
Kids: ♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ♪
12
00:00:32,344 --> 00:00:33,896
Captain: ♪ THEN DROP ON THE DECK
AND FLOP LIKE A FISH ♪
13
00:00:34,068 --> 00:00:35,413
Kids: ♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ♪
14
00:00:35,620 --> 00:00:37,103
Captain: ♪ READY? ♪
15
00:00:37,310 --> 00:00:38,689
All: ♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ♪
16
00:00:38,896 --> 00:00:40,241
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ♪
17
00:00:40,448 --> 00:00:42,310
♪ SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS ♪
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00:00:42,517 --> 00:00:44,931
Captain: ♪ SPONGEBOB
SQUAREPANTS ♪
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00:00:45,103 --> 00:00:47,344
[CAPTAIN LAUGHING]
20
00:00:47,551 --> 00:00:49,896
[WHISTLING]
21
00:00:50,068 --> 00:00:50,793
[WAVES CRASHING...
SEAGULLS SQUAWKING]
22
00:00:53,172 --> 00:00:54,689
[♪...]
23
00:01:02,965 --> 00:01:06,000
SpongeBob: 97, 98, 99...
24
00:01:07,103 --> 00:01:08,793
100.
25
00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,793
OK, GARY, LET'S DO
THE OTHER SIDE NOW.
26
00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:13,103
GARY?
27
00:01:13,310 --> 00:01:14,137
CAN YOU HEAR THAT?
28
00:01:27,103 --> 00:01:28,827
OH, SQUIDWARD, IT'S YOU.
29
00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:31,172
I THOUGHT I HEARD SOMETHING.
30
00:01:31,379 --> 00:01:34,448
SPONGEBOB, I'VE BEEN SITTING
HERE MOTIONLESS FOR 45 MINUTES.
31
00:01:34,655 --> 00:01:37,206
WHAT COULD YOU POSSIBLY
HAVE HEARD ME DOING?
32
00:01:37,413 --> 00:01:40,034
BREATHING.
33
00:01:40,241 --> 00:01:44,448
SPONGEBOB, I WILL GIVE YOU $5
IF YOU LET ME ENJOY THE REST
OF MY MORNING IN PEACE.
34
00:01:44,655 --> 00:01:46,000
OK.
35
00:01:46,172 --> 00:01:48,034
[GRUMBLING]
36
00:01:48,241 --> 00:01:50,379
HEY, I COULD'VE SWORN
I HAD $5 IN HERE.
37
00:01:50,586 --> 00:01:52,448
I HAVE IT, SQUIDWARD.
38
00:01:52,655 --> 00:01:55,724
YOU GAVE IT TO ME
TO LEAVE YOU ALONE YESTERDAY.
39
00:01:55,931 --> 00:01:57,310
SQUIDWARD, YOU CAN HAVE
THE $5 BACK.
40
00:01:57,517 --> 00:01:59,103
MR. KRABS SAYS...
41
00:01:59,310 --> 00:02:01,137
I DON'T CARE
WHAT MR. KRABS SAYS.
42
00:02:01,344 --> 00:02:03,862
I JUST WANT...
43
00:02:04,034 --> 00:02:06,862
COFFEE RAIN!
44
00:02:07,034 --> 00:02:10,275
IT'S HOT CHOCOLATE.
45
00:02:10,482 --> 00:02:13,517
CHOCOLATE RAIN!
46
00:02:13,724 --> 00:02:17,241
SQUIDWARD.
47
00:02:17,448 --> 00:02:18,551
[SCREAMING]
48
00:02:18,758 --> 00:02:20,275
SQUIDWARD, WAIT!
49
00:02:20,482 --> 00:02:20,931
[PANTING]
50
00:02:27,068 --> 00:02:27,827
[PANTING]
51
00:02:31,655 --> 00:02:33,379
[GRUNTING]
52
00:02:33,586 --> 00:02:34,862
IT'S LOCKED.
53
00:02:35,034 --> 00:02:36,137
SpongeBob: SQUIDWARD.
54
00:02:36,344 --> 00:02:38,620
SQUID...WARD.
55
00:02:38,827 --> 00:02:40,482
[GRMUBLING]
56
00:02:40,689 --> 00:02:43,344
HUH?
57
00:02:43,551 --> 00:02:45,310
THE KEY.
58
00:02:45,517 --> 00:02:47,482
OH, WHERE DID I PUT
THAT STUPID...
59
00:02:47,689 --> 00:02:48,793
SQUIDWARD.
60
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:50,172
[STAMMERING]
61
00:02:50,379 --> 00:02:51,793
SQUIDWARD.
62
00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:53,793
OH, WHY CAN'T I JUST FIND THE...
63
00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:54,965
SQUIDWARD?
64
00:02:55,137 --> 00:02:56,103
WHAT?
65
00:02:56,310 --> 00:02:58,206
[PANTING]
66
00:02:58,413 --> 00:03:00,758
YOU LEFT YOUR KEYS ON
THE TABLE BACK THERE.
67
00:03:00,965 --> 00:03:02,172
[ENGINE REVVING]
68
00:03:02,379 --> 00:03:03,344
HEY, SQUIDWARD.
69
00:03:03,551 --> 00:03:05,655
YES?
70
00:03:05,862 --> 00:03:06,965
DIDN'T YOU USED TO HAVE ONE
OF THOSE CUCUMBER BICYCLES?
71
00:03:07,137 --> 00:03:08,931
OH, [LAUGHING].
72
00:03:09,103 --> 00:03:10,965
THAT WAS A RECUMBENT BICYCLE,
AND I SOLD IT.
73
00:03:11,137 --> 00:03:12,965
WHY?
74
00:03:13,137 --> 00:03:14,206
SO I COULD GET FURTHER
AWAY FROM YOU!
75
00:03:14,413 --> 00:03:15,482
[LAUGHING]
76
00:03:20,344 --> 00:03:22,482
OK, I'LL SEE YOU
LATER THEN, SQUIDWARD.
77
00:03:22,689 --> 00:03:26,310
BON VOYAGE, NINCOMPOOP.
78
00:03:26,517 --> 00:03:30,827
[POLICE SIREN BLARING...]
79
00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:33,586
WHAT THE?
80
00:03:33,793 --> 00:03:35,517
[INDISTINCT VOICE ON RADIO]
81
00:03:35,724 --> 00:03:37,689
CAN I HELP YOU, OFFICER?
82
00:03:37,896 --> 00:03:39,620
NO.
83
00:03:39,827 --> 00:03:41,896
BUT YOU CAN HELP YOURSELF
TO THIS TICKET.
84
00:03:42,068 --> 00:03:43,068
[GASPING]
85
00:03:43,275 --> 00:03:44,655
TICKET?
86
00:03:44,862 --> 00:03:45,965
[INDISTINCT VOICE ON RADIO]
87
00:03:46,137 --> 00:03:47,586
OFFICER, PLEASE.
88
00:03:47,793 --> 00:03:49,931
I HAVE IMPECCABLE BOAT SMARTS.
89
00:03:50,103 --> 00:03:51,931
I PRIDE MYSELF IN MAINTAINING
AN UNSOILED DRIVING RECORD.
90
00:03:52,103 --> 00:03:54,724
IT'S ALL THAT I HAVE.
91
00:03:54,931 --> 00:03:58,586
WELL, YOU CAN HAVE IT AGAIN
RIGHT AFTER YOU COMPLETE
BOATING SCHOOL.
92
00:03:59,896 --> 00:04:01,103
[STAMMERING]
93
00:04:04,379 --> 00:04:05,448
BOATING SCHOOL.
94
00:04:05,655 --> 00:04:07,000
[HUFFING]
95
00:04:07,206 --> 00:04:09,137
OH, WELL.
96
00:04:09,344 --> 00:04:10,586
IT'S JUST ONE DAY OUT
OF YOUR LIFE, SQUIDDY.
97
00:04:10,793 --> 00:04:12,034
HOW BAD COULD IT BE?
98
00:04:12,241 --> 00:04:15,724
OH, SQUIDWARD.
99
00:04:15,931 --> 00:04:18,482
[SOBBING]
100
00:04:18,689 --> 00:04:20,448
GOOD MORNING, CLASS.
101
00:04:20,655 --> 00:04:21,931
WOULD EVERYONE PLEASE
TAKE A SEAT?
102
00:04:22,103 --> 00:04:23,206
[MURMURING]
103
00:04:23,413 --> 00:04:24,379
PSST, SQUIDWARD.
104
00:04:24,586 --> 00:04:25,758
SIT HERE.
105
00:04:25,965 --> 00:04:27,689
HERE.
106
00:04:27,896 --> 00:04:29,827
UM, EXCUSE ME.
107
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,793
THERE DON'T SEEM TO BE
ANY EMPTY SEATS LEFT.
108
00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:32,827
BUT THERE'S ONE
RIGHT NEXT TO SPONGEBOB.
109
00:04:38,896 --> 00:04:40,206
DO YOU MIND?
110
00:04:40,413 --> 00:04:41,689
DON'T WORRY, SQUIDWARD.
111
00:04:41,896 --> 00:04:43,896
WE'RE BOATING BUDDIES NOW.
112
00:04:44,068 --> 00:04:48,068
I'LL TEACH YOU EVERYTHING
I KNOW, AND THEN WE CAN...
113
00:04:48,275 --> 00:04:51,551
WE WON'T BE DOING ANYTHING,
BECAUSE THERE IS NO "WE".
114
00:04:51,758 --> 00:04:53,034
UNDERSTAND?
115
00:04:53,241 --> 00:04:54,379
QUIET IN THE FRONT, PLEASE.
116
00:04:54,586 --> 00:04:56,275
OH, I UNDERSTAND.
117
00:04:56,482 --> 00:05:00,793
I UNDERSTAND PERFECTLY...
BOATING BUDDY.
118
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:02,724
Mrs. Puff: OK, CLASS.
119
00:05:02,931 --> 00:05:04,896
WHY DON'T WE GET
TO KNOW OUR NEW STUDENTS
120
00:05:05,068 --> 00:05:07,034
BY TELLING EACH OTHER WHY
WE WERE SENTENCED TO...
121
00:05:07,241 --> 00:05:10,000
I MEAN, WHY WE ARE ENROLLED
IN BOATING SCHOOL.
122
00:05:10,172 --> 00:05:12,275
UM, I GOT CAUGHT SPEEDING.
123
00:05:12,482 --> 00:05:13,448
VERY GOOD.
124
00:05:13,655 --> 00:05:15,517
NEXT.
125
00:05:15,724 --> 00:05:17,000
I DON'T SEE WHAT'S
SO VERY GOOD ABOUT IT.
126
00:05:17,172 --> 00:05:18,137
NO, I DIDN'T MEAN VERY...
127
00:05:18,344 --> 00:05:19,620
[SIGHING]
128
00:05:19,827 --> 00:05:20,827
I KNOW WHAT YOU MEANT.
129
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:22,310
NEXT.
130
00:05:22,517 --> 00:05:24,379
I AM HERE BECAUSE MY...
131
00:05:24,586 --> 00:05:26,551
WE ALL KNOW WHY
YOU'RE HERE, SPONGEBOB.
132
00:05:26,758 --> 00:05:27,724
WHAT ABOUT YOU, SIR?
133
00:05:27,931 --> 00:05:28,896
WHAT, ME?
134
00:05:29,068 --> 00:05:31,517
YES.
135
00:05:31,724 --> 00:05:32,758
WOULD YOU LIKE TO TELL
THE REST OF THE CLASS
WHY YOU'RE WITH US TODAY?
136
00:05:32,965 --> 00:05:34,103
WHY, I...
137
00:05:34,310 --> 00:05:36,862
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
138
00:05:37,034 --> 00:05:38,827
ALL RIGHT, I'LL TELL YOU.
139
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:41,172
I WAS TRYING
TO GET AWAY FROM HIM!
140
00:05:43,758 --> 00:05:45,517
HE IS THE BANE OF MY EXISTENCE.
141
00:05:45,724 --> 00:05:47,931
YOURS TOO?
142
00:05:48,103 --> 00:05:50,206
UH, WHAT I MEANT TO SAY WAS,
PLEASE COME UP TO THE CHALKBOARD
143
00:05:50,413 --> 00:05:52,724
AND DRAW A DIAGRAM
OF THE INCIDENT.
144
00:05:52,931 --> 00:05:55,620
Squidward: GLADLY.
145
00:05:55,827 --> 00:05:57,000
IT ALL STARTED
WHEN I LEFT MY HOUSE.
146
00:06:01,482 --> 00:06:02,137
AND THEN HE APPEARED.
147
00:06:05,896 --> 00:06:08,586
HE MADE AN IMMEDIATE
RIGHT TURN AND PARKED...
148
00:06:08,793 --> 00:06:11,344
...HERE.
149
00:06:11,551 --> 00:06:15,724
SEEING THE ONCOMING HAZARD,
I LOOKED BOTH WAYS AND PROCEEDED
SAFELY TOWARD MY VEHICLE.
150
00:06:15,931 --> 00:06:19,310
IT WAS THEN THAT I REALIZED
I WAS BEING FOLLOWED
AT AN UNSAFE DISTANCE.
151
00:06:22,137 --> 00:06:25,310
SO IN ORDER TO CREATE
MORE OPTIMAL DRIVING CONDITIONS
152
00:06:25,517 --> 00:06:29,896
I WAS FORCED TO THEN PARTAKE
IN EVASIVE ACTION.[SCREECHING]
153
00:06:30,068 --> 00:06:31,827
[ALL GROANING]
154
00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:34,758
AND BY INCREASING SPEED SLIGHTLY
155
00:06:34,965 --> 00:06:38,517
I CREATED A SAFETY CUSHION
WHILE INADVERTENTLY ATTRACTING
156
00:06:38,724 --> 00:06:42,137
THE ATTENTION OF SAID
LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICIAL.
157
00:06:42,344 --> 00:06:45,241
MAY I SIT DOWN NOW,
SWEET CHEEKS?
158
00:06:45,448 --> 00:06:46,586
WHY, CERTAINLY.
159
00:06:46,793 --> 00:06:49,172
AND PERHAPS NOW
160
00:06:49,379 --> 00:06:51,862
SPONGEBOB WOULD LIKE
TO COME UP AND ILLUSTRATE
HIS SIDE OF THE STORY.
161
00:06:52,034 --> 00:06:54,448
HIS SIDE?
162
00:06:54,655 --> 00:06:58,862
WELL, FIRST, I STARTED
OVER HERE, AND THEN,
I WENT WAY OVER HERE.
163
00:06:59,034 --> 00:07:01,275
DOO-DOO-DOO-DOO-DOO, LIKE THAT.
164
00:07:01,482 --> 00:07:03,413
AND THEN,
I WENT AROUND LIKE THIS,
AND OVER HERE LIKE THAT
165
00:07:03,620 --> 00:07:05,310
AND ACROSS THIS WAY,
AND THEN DOWN HERE
166
00:07:05,517 --> 00:07:05,724
AND OVER HERE LIKE THIS,
AND THEN...
167
00:07:21,206 --> 00:07:26,241
AND THEN, I CAME AROUND
AND STOPPED RIGHT HERE.
168
00:07:26,448 --> 00:07:30,724
Class: SPONGEBOB AND SQUIDWARD,
BEST BOATING BUDDIES FOREVER?
169
00:07:30,931 --> 00:07:32,206
[ALL TALKING AT ONCE]
170
00:07:32,413 --> 00:07:34,413
DO YOU LIKE IT, SQUIDWARD?
171
00:07:34,620 --> 00:07:35,896
SHUT IT.
172
00:07:36,068 --> 00:07:38,068
[SCHOOL BELL RINGING]
173
00:07:38,275 --> 00:07:39,896
[GENERAL CONVERSATION]
174
00:07:40,068 --> 00:07:42,206
AH, LUNCH TIME,
EH, BOATING BUDDY?
175
00:07:45,620 --> 00:07:47,965
I'LL HAVE TO EAT OVER HERE,
JUST LIKE BACK IN GRADE SCHOOL.
176
00:07:48,137 --> 00:07:49,965
[SPONGEBOB GRUNTING]
177
00:07:50,137 --> 00:07:51,413
SQUIDWARD, YOU GOT ANY
EXTRA MUSTARD IN THERE?
178
00:07:51,620 --> 00:07:53,137
[SQUIDWARD SCREAMING]
179
00:07:53,344 --> 00:07:55,551
MM, BON APPETIT, SQUIDDY.
180
00:07:55,758 --> 00:07:58,034
[TOILET FLUSHING]
181
00:07:58,241 --> 00:08:00,758
[GROANING]
182
00:08:00,965 --> 00:08:05,482
YOU'VE RUINED MY MORNING,
YOU'VE RUINED MY LUNCH,
AND YOU'RE RUINING MY...
183
00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:07,482
[STAMMERING...]
184
00:08:11,689 --> 00:08:12,931
[SCHOOL BELL RINGING]
185
00:08:13,103 --> 00:08:14,896
Mrs. Puff: OK, CLASS.
186
00:08:15,068 --> 00:08:17,379
IT'S TIME FOR OUR BEHIND
THE WHEEL LESSON.
187
00:08:17,586 --> 00:08:20,655
SQUIDWARD, YOU'LL BE RIDING
WITH SPONGEBOB.
188
00:08:20,862 --> 00:08:23,344
YEAH, I NEVER SAW THAT COMING.
189
00:08:23,551 --> 00:08:27,000
NOW, WE'RE GONNA TAKE
THIS NICE AND SLOW.
190
00:08:27,206 --> 00:08:30,172
SPONGEBOB, WHAT DO WE DO
WHEN PULLING AWAY FROM THE CURB?
191
00:08:30,379 --> 00:08:31,344
STEP ON THE GAS?
192
00:08:31,551 --> 00:08:32,689
GOOD.
193
00:08:32,896 --> 00:08:34,000
NICE AND EASY.
194
00:08:34,206 --> 00:08:35,310
NOW LET'S SLOW...
195
00:08:35,517 --> 00:08:36,827
[SCREAMING]
196
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:37,310
SPONGEBOB, LOOK OUT!
197
00:08:43,241 --> 00:08:44,482
SPONGEBOB, GIVE ME THE WHEEL.
198
00:08:44,689 --> 00:08:45,724
I GOT IT, I GOT IT.
199
00:08:45,931 --> 00:08:47,034
[STAMMERING]
200
00:08:47,241 --> 00:08:48,344
JUST LET GO OF IT!
201
00:08:48,551 --> 00:08:50,344
[SCREAMING]
202
00:08:50,551 --> 00:08:51,827
HOOLIGANS!
203
00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:53,000
[SCREAMING]
204
00:08:56,517 --> 00:08:58,137
[BELL RINGING]
205
00:08:58,344 --> 00:08:58,931
[SCREAMING]
206
00:09:03,517 --> 00:09:06,344
[SCREAMING]
207
00:09:06,551 --> 00:09:08,931
JOHNSON, I'VE FINALLY
FIGURED OUT A WAY
208
00:09:09,103 --> 00:09:12,310
TO SHRINK AN ORDINARY MAILMAN
DOWN TO THE SIZE
OF A GRAIN OF SAND.
209
00:09:12,517 --> 00:09:13,793
BUT HOW?
210
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:14,758
BY USING THIS SHRINK RAY.
211
00:09:19,793 --> 00:09:22,103
MOTHER OF MERCY!
212
00:09:22,310 --> 00:09:23,448
WHERE'D THEY GO?
213
00:09:23,655 --> 00:09:25,655
Scientist: THERE.
214
00:09:25,862 --> 00:09:27,310
THEY'RE HEADED RIGHT FOR
THAT DISCARDED POTATO CHIP.
215
00:09:27,517 --> 00:09:29,724
[GROWLING]
216
00:09:29,931 --> 00:09:31,620
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
217
00:09:31,827 --> 00:09:33,206
POTATO CHIPS
ARE HIS FAVORITE SNACK.
218
00:09:33,413 --> 00:09:35,103
JOHNSON!
219
00:09:35,310 --> 00:09:38,793
NO!
220
00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:40,379
NO, NO, NO.
221
00:09:53,275 --> 00:09:56,241
I NEVER WILL UNDERSTAND
THESE CITY FOLK.
222
00:09:56,448 --> 00:09:58,000
SpongeBob: HEY,
WHERE'D SQUIDWARD GO?
223
00:09:58,206 --> 00:10:00,344
[WHISTLING]
224
00:10:02,482 --> 00:10:03,931
[GROWLING]
225
00:10:04,103 --> 00:10:05,896
I WAS JUST LEAVING.
226
00:10:06,068 --> 00:10:08,172
[SCHOOL BELL RINGING]
227
00:10:08,379 --> 00:10:10,793
Mrs. Puff: OK, CLASS, IT'S TIME
TO TAKE OUR FINAL EXAM.
228
00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:12,241
PLEASE HAVE YOUR PENCILS READY.
229
00:10:12,448 --> 00:10:13,620
PSST.
230
00:10:13,827 --> 00:10:15,965
HEY, BOATING BUDDY.
231
00:10:16,137 --> 00:10:17,965
IF YOU NEED ANY HELP, I'VE TAKEN
THIS TEST HUNDREDS OF TIMES.
232
00:10:18,137 --> 00:10:19,965
HOW MANY TIMES
DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU?
233
00:10:20,137 --> 00:10:22,206
I AM NOT YOUR BUDDY.
234
00:10:22,413 --> 00:10:26,862
I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP,
AND I DON'T NEED YOU, EVER!
235
00:10:27,034 --> 00:10:29,655
NOW, JUST KINDLY LET ME
TAKE THIS STUPID TEST
236
00:10:29,862 --> 00:10:33,448
SO I CAN GET OUT OF HERE
AND NEVER HAVE TO SEE YOU AGAIN
FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.
237
00:10:33,655 --> 00:10:35,551
OK, SQUIDWARD, IF THAT'S
THE WAY YOU WANT IT.
238
00:10:35,758 --> 00:10:37,586
THANK YOU.
239
00:10:37,793 --> 00:10:41,931
[SQUIDWARD GRUNTING]
240
00:10:46,965 --> 00:10:48,068
THREE MORE MINUTES, CLASS.
241
00:10:48,275 --> 00:10:49,344
[GRUNTING]
242
00:10:49,551 --> 00:10:51,000
SPONGEBOB.
243
00:10:51,206 --> 00:10:52,586
SPONGEBOB, I NEED YOUR HELP.
244
00:10:52,793 --> 00:10:54,000
Mrs. Puff: TWO MORE MINUTES.
245
00:10:54,172 --> 00:10:55,379
SPONGEBOB, PLEASE?
246
00:10:55,586 --> 00:10:57,965
THIS IS IMPORTANT.
247
00:10:58,137 --> 00:11:00,103
YOU SAID YOU DIDN'T
NEED MY HELP, SQUIDWARD,
AND THAT YOU DIDN'T NEED ME.
248
00:11:00,310 --> 00:11:01,517
NO, NO, I DIDN'T.
249
00:11:01,724 --> 00:11:03,689
I NEVER SAID THAT.
250
00:11:03,896 --> 00:11:06,551
I don't need your help,
and I don't need you.
251
00:11:06,758 --> 00:11:09,034
JERK.
252
00:11:09,241 --> 00:11:11,448
ALL RIGHT, I SAID IT,
BUT THAT WAS BEFORE.
253
00:11:11,655 --> 00:11:12,896
BEFORE WHAT?
254
00:11:13,068 --> 00:11:15,137
BEFORE... BEFORE...
255
00:11:15,344 --> 00:11:17,275
Mrs. Puff: ONE MORE
MINUTE, CLASS.
256
00:11:17,482 --> 00:11:20,448
BEFORE WE WERE...
[GASPING], BOATING BUDDIES.
257
00:11:21,620 --> 00:11:23,413
YAY!
258
00:11:23,620 --> 00:11:24,896
Mrs. Puff: OKAY, CLASS,
TIME IS UP.
259
00:11:25,068 --> 00:11:26,206
[SCHOOL BELL RINGING]
260
00:11:26,413 --> 00:11:28,413
TIME CAN'T BE UP.
261
00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:29,896
I DIDN'T GET A CHANCE
TO FILL IN A SINGLE ANSWER.
262
00:11:30,068 --> 00:11:32,482
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?
263
00:11:32,689 --> 00:11:34,068
YOU DO THE SAME THING
THAT EVERYBODY ELSE DOES
WHO FAILS THE TEST.
264
00:11:34,275 --> 00:11:35,827
YOU TAKE IT AGAIN NEXT WEEK.
265
00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:37,241
NEXT WEEK?
266
00:11:37,448 --> 00:11:39,275
DON'T WORRY, SQUIDWARD.
267
00:11:39,482 --> 00:11:41,551
I'VE NEVER GOTTEN ONE ANSWER
RIGHT ON THIS TEST
268
00:11:41,758 --> 00:11:44,172
BUT WE'LL MEET AGAIN NEXT WEEK
AT MRS. PUFF'S BOATING SCHOOL.
269
00:11:44,379 --> 00:11:49,620
[SCHOOL BELL RINGING][SQUIDWARD SCREAMING]
270
00:11:51,862 --> 00:11:57,206
[♪...]
271
00:12:03,793 --> 00:12:04,931
SpongeBob: ORDER UP!
272
00:12:05,103 --> 00:12:06,517
[BELL RINGING]
273
00:12:06,724 --> 00:12:08,551
HOW'S IT LOOKIN' OUT THERE, BOY?
274
00:12:08,758 --> 00:12:10,793
LIKE TWO MORE
SATISFIED REGULARS, MR. K.
275
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:13,689
I AIN'T INTERESTED IN THE SAME
OLD REGULARS, SPONGEBOB.
276
00:12:13,896 --> 00:12:16,655
SO I TOOK OUT AN AD
IN THE BIKINI BOTTOM EXAMINER
TO BRING IN SOME NEW CUSTOMERS.
277
00:12:16,862 --> 00:12:18,344
'TWAS A BARGAIN TOO.
278
00:12:18,551 --> 00:12:20,275
ONLY COST ME A NICKEL.
279
00:12:20,482 --> 00:12:22,379
SO TELL ME NOW, BOY.
280
00:12:22,586 --> 00:12:25,655
HOW MANY NEW CUSTOMERS
WE GOT OUT THERE SO FAR?
281
00:12:25,862 --> 00:12:27,172
OOH, UH, LET ME SEE.
282
00:12:27,379 --> 00:12:28,896
THERE WAS... NONE.
283
00:12:29,068 --> 00:12:30,379
WHAT?
284
00:12:30,586 --> 00:12:32,310
WHAT DO YOU MEAN, NONE?
285
00:12:32,517 --> 00:12:34,551
DON'T THESE PEOPLE
READ THE PAPER?
286
00:12:34,758 --> 00:12:37,137
OOH.
287
00:12:37,344 --> 00:12:39,586
THIS THING HASN'T BEEN
TOUCHED IN MONTHS.
288
00:12:39,793 --> 00:12:43,275
WHILE THAT PAPER IS SELLIN'
LIKE KRABBY PATTIES.
289
00:12:43,482 --> 00:12:45,551
EH, PARDON ME, SIR.
290
00:12:45,758 --> 00:12:48,931
COULD I INTEREST YOU IN A COPY
OF THE EXAMINER THIS FINE DAY?
291
00:12:49,103 --> 00:12:50,551
[LAUGHING]
292
00:12:50,758 --> 00:12:52,482
NOBODY READS THE EXAMINER, BUD.
293
00:12:52,689 --> 00:12:55,344
IT'S ALL FULL OF
BORING CHARTS AND FACTS.
294
00:12:55,551 --> 00:12:57,724
THE BOTTOM FEEDER
IS WHERE IT'S AT.
295
00:12:57,931 --> 00:13:00,379
IT'S GOT, LIKE,
INTERESTING STORIES AND STUFF.
296
00:13:00,586 --> 00:13:02,103
FISH BOY STRIKES AGAIN?
297
00:13:02,310 --> 00:13:04,172
WAIT A MINUTE.
298
00:13:04,379 --> 00:13:06,034
AREN'T THESE STORIES
A LITTLE LESS THAN TRUTHFUL?
299
00:13:06,241 --> 00:13:07,931
I DON'T KNOW,
BUT THEY'RE SELLING.
300
00:13:08,103 --> 00:13:11,172
YES, THEY CERTAINLY ARE.
301
00:13:11,379 --> 00:13:13,068
PLEASE, ALLOW ME.
302
00:13:13,275 --> 00:13:14,517
THANK YOU.
303
00:13:14,724 --> 00:13:17,000
NO, THANK YOU.
304
00:13:17,206 --> 00:13:20,000
NOW, LET'S SEE HOW MUCH
THEY CHARGE FOR ADVERTISING.
305
00:13:20,172 --> 00:13:21,379
[SCREAMING]
306
00:13:21,586 --> 00:13:23,862
25 CENTS PER WORD?
307
00:13:24,034 --> 00:13:25,482
THE NEWSPAPER BUSINESS
SURE IS EASY MONEY.
308
00:13:29,034 --> 00:13:30,724
THAT GIVES ME AN IDEA.
309
00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:38,551
WHAT A "FANTABULASTICAL" DAY,
EH, SQUIDDY?
310
00:13:38,758 --> 00:13:41,793
YEP, ANOTHER WONDERFUL,
HUMDRUM DAY SLINGING BURGERS.
311
00:13:44,965 --> 00:13:47,310
OFF OF YOUR DUFF, BOY.
312
00:13:47,517 --> 00:13:49,310
YOU THINK I SPENT ALL LAST NIGHT
ASSEMBLING THIS PRINTING PRESS
313
00:13:49,517 --> 00:13:52,310
SO YOU COULD
LAZE AROUND ALL DAY?
314
00:13:52,517 --> 00:13:56,931
FROM NOW ON,
YOU'LL BE TWICE AS BUSY, AND
I EXPECT YOU TO WEAR TWO HATS
315
00:13:57,103 --> 00:13:59,862
'CAUSE ALONG WITH
YOUR USUAL FRY-COOKIN' DUTIES
316
00:14:00,103 --> 00:14:03,793
YOU'RE MY LEAD REPORTER
FOR THE NEW KRABBY KRONICLE.
317
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:06,275
OH, MY VERY OWN PRESS BADGE!
318
00:14:06,482 --> 00:14:07,896
THAT'S RIGHT, BOY.
319
00:14:08,068 --> 00:14:10,827
AND HERE'S YOUR VERY OWN CAMERA.
320
00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:13,965
SEE, YOU'LL NEED IT TO DOCUMENT
ALL THEM JUICY STORIES
YOU'RE GONNA WRITE.
321
00:14:14,137 --> 00:14:16,172
WELL, WHAT ARE YOU
WAITIN' FOR, BOY?
322
00:14:16,379 --> 00:14:18,965
THE PUBLIC THIRSTS FOR
A JUICY STORY, EH?
323
00:14:19,137 --> 00:14:21,379
HM, BUT WHAT KIND OF STORY
IS JUICY ENOUGH TO QUENCH
THEIR DRY NEWS GULLETS?
324
00:14:21,586 --> 00:14:23,241
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE
TO BEGIN TO LOOK.
325
00:14:23,448 --> 00:14:25,379
[ALARM BLARING][PEOPLE TALKING AT ONCE]
326
00:14:27,586 --> 00:14:30,551
[GROWLING]
327
00:14:30,758 --> 00:14:32,482
HM, NO NEWS TO REPORT HERE.
328
00:14:32,689 --> 00:14:34,931
STOP THE PRESSES, IT'S PATRICK!
329
00:14:35,103 --> 00:14:38,034
AND HE APPEARS TO BE
WAITING FOR THE BUS.
330
00:14:38,241 --> 00:14:41,620
THIS IS THE KIND
OF BREAKING STORY MY READERS
ARE WAITING FOR.
331
00:14:41,827 --> 00:14:43,689
PATRICK STAR?
332
00:14:43,896 --> 00:14:45,862
I'M SCOUP SQUAREPANTS
FROM THE KRABBY KRONICLE.
333
00:14:46,034 --> 00:14:47,827
EVERYONE'S WONDERING,
WHAT BUS ARE YOU TAKING TODAY?
334
00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:50,413
OH, I'M NOT TAKING
A BUS, SPONGEBOB.
335
00:14:50,620 --> 00:14:54,620
I AM WATCHING THIS POLE,
SO THE NEXT TIME IT MOVES,
I WILL SEE IT.
336
00:14:56,931 --> 00:14:58,206
WHOA, THIS STORY IS JUICY.
337
00:15:11,655 --> 00:15:14,758
WHAT A "MONEY-TASTICAL" DAY,
EH, MR. SQUIDWARD?
338
00:15:14,965 --> 00:15:17,206
YEAH, I'M JUST RAKING IT IN.
339
00:15:17,413 --> 00:15:20,724
I'M EXCITED ABOUT ALL
THE NEWSPAPER SALES TOO.
340
00:15:20,931 --> 00:15:22,931
WE HAVEN'T SOLD
ANY PAPERS TODAY.
341
00:15:23,103 --> 00:15:25,586
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
WE HAVEN'T SOLD ANY NEWSPAPERS?
342
00:15:25,793 --> 00:15:29,206
CERTAINLY, THIS GENTLEMAN
WOULD LIKE A COPY
OF THE KRABBY KRONICLE.
343
00:15:29,413 --> 00:15:30,862
LOOKS BORING.
344
00:15:31,034 --> 00:15:32,103
CAN I JUST HAVE A KRABBY PATTY?
345
00:15:32,310 --> 00:15:34,172
TOO BORING?
346
00:15:34,379 --> 00:15:35,758
SPONGEBOB!
347
00:15:35,965 --> 00:15:37,241
WHAT'S THE MEANING OF THIS?
348
00:15:37,448 --> 00:15:38,758
MEANING OF WHAT, MR. KRABS?
349
00:15:38,965 --> 00:15:40,965
LOCAL RESIDENT WATCHES POLE?
350
00:15:41,137 --> 00:15:43,724
NO ONE'S GONNA PAY
TO READ THIS MALARKEY.
351
00:15:43,931 --> 00:15:47,034
WHEN YOU WRITE THESE STORIES,
YOU GOT TO USE
A LITTLE IMAGINATION, BOY.
352
00:15:47,241 --> 00:15:49,517
IMAGINATION.
353
00:15:49,724 --> 00:15:51,413
YEAH.
354
00:15:51,620 --> 00:15:53,896
MAYBE INSTEAD OF
"MAN WATCHES POLE"
355
00:15:54,068 --> 00:15:58,379
YOU COULD SAY SOMETHING
LIKE, OH, "MAN MARRIES POLE."
356
00:15:58,586 --> 00:16:02,275
THEN YOU COULD ALTER THE PHOTO
TO FIT THE HEADLINE, AND SEE?
357
00:16:02,482 --> 00:16:04,413
NOW, THAT'S A JUICY STORY.
358
00:16:04,620 --> 00:16:06,034
MR. KRABS, ISN'T THAT LYING?
359
00:16:06,241 --> 00:16:07,724
DON'T THINK OF IT AS LYING, BOY.
360
00:16:07,931 --> 00:16:10,689
THINK OF IT AS A PRACTICAL JOKE.
361
00:16:10,896 --> 00:16:13,310
YOU KNOW, SOMETHING EVERYBODY
CAN HAVE A GOOD LAUGH ABOUT.
362
00:16:13,517 --> 00:16:16,068
THE PUBLIC EXPECTS A LITTLE
EMBELLISHMENT HERE AND THERE
363
00:16:16,275 --> 00:16:19,241
SO I WANT YOU TO GO OUT THERE
AND GET ME A LEAD STORY
THAT'LL SELL.
364
00:16:27,931 --> 00:16:29,931
[LAUGHING]
365
00:16:30,103 --> 00:16:32,068
MRS. PUFF IS GONNA LAUGH
HER HAT OFF WHEN SHE READS THIS.
366
00:16:32,275 --> 00:16:34,379
Mr. Krabs: BOATING TEACHER
IN HIGH SPEED CHASE!
367
00:16:34,586 --> 00:16:36,413
I THINK YOU'VE FINALLY
DONE IT, BOY!
368
00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:38,689
YOU'VE GIVEN ME
A STORY THAT'LL SELL!
369
00:16:38,896 --> 00:16:40,137
AND SELL IT HAS.
370
00:16:40,344 --> 00:16:42,896
[GENERAL CONVERSATION]
371
00:16:43,068 --> 00:16:44,965
YEAH, BUT THAT ISN'T
THE STORY I WROTE.
372
00:16:45,137 --> 00:16:47,103
THAT'S CALLED
EDITORIAL PRIVILEGE, SON.
373
00:16:47,310 --> 00:16:49,896
IT GIVES IT THAT EXTRA "OOMPH"
TO MOVE UNITS.
374
00:16:50,068 --> 00:16:55,172
BESIDES, HOW COULD SUCH
A LITTLE NEWS STORY POSSIBLY
EFFECT MRS. PUFF IN ANY WAY?
375
00:16:55,379 --> 00:16:59,000
I CAN'T BELIEVE SUCH
A LITTLE NEWS STORY
COULD HAVE RUINED MY BUSINESS.
376
00:17:03,068 --> 00:17:05,000
LET'S SEE WHAT THERE IS TO SEE.
377
00:17:05,172 --> 00:17:06,724
WAIT A MINUTE.
378
00:17:06,931 --> 00:17:08,448
LARRY THE LOBSTER.
379
00:17:08,655 --> 00:17:10,758
HM.
380
00:17:10,965 --> 00:17:11,620
I WONDER WHAT KIND OF DIRT
HE HAS UNDER THOSE MUSCLES.
381
00:17:14,551 --> 00:17:15,689
AH-HA.
382
00:17:15,896 --> 00:17:17,413
THIS LOOKS SHADY.
383
00:17:17,620 --> 00:17:19,310
VERY SHADY.
384
00:17:19,517 --> 00:17:20,620
LARRY.
385
00:17:20,827 --> 00:17:22,172
HEY, TOUGH GUY.
386
00:17:22,379 --> 00:17:23,344
CAN I PUNCH YOU IN THE GUT?
387
00:17:23,551 --> 00:17:24,724
SURE.
388
00:17:24,931 --> 00:17:26,206
EVERYBODY DOES.
389
00:17:26,413 --> 00:17:27,482
IT WON'T HURT ME A BIT.
390
00:17:27,689 --> 00:17:29,000
[LAUGHING]
391
00:17:29,206 --> 00:17:30,310
TOLD YOU IT WOULDN'T HURT.
392
00:17:30,517 --> 00:17:31,689
THANKS, BIG GUY.
393
00:17:31,896 --> 00:17:33,068
SEE YOU AROUND.
394
00:17:33,275 --> 00:17:35,551
VERY INTERESTING.
395
00:17:35,758 --> 00:17:37,482
Male voice: OUT, OUT, OUT!
396
00:17:37,689 --> 00:17:39,275
HEY, WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?
397
00:17:39,482 --> 00:17:41,517
THIS!
398
00:17:41,724 --> 00:17:43,517
Larry: LARRY THE LOSER
GETS BEATEN UP BY PIPSQUEAK?
399
00:17:43,724 --> 00:17:44,689
BUT... BUT... BUT...
400
00:17:44,896 --> 00:17:47,103
NO BUTS.
401
00:17:47,310 --> 00:17:49,586
I CAN'T HAVE A WIMP LIKE YOU
DESTROYING MY GYM'S REPUTATION.
402
00:17:49,793 --> 00:17:51,241
YOU'RE BANNED FOREVER.
403
00:17:51,448 --> 00:17:52,620
HELLO, LARRY.
404
00:17:52,827 --> 00:17:54,655
NOT NOW, SPONGEBOB.
405
00:17:54,862 --> 00:17:56,275
LET ME TAKE IN THE FACT
THAT MY LIFE IS RUINED.
406
00:17:56,482 --> 00:17:57,862
RUINED?
407
00:17:58,034 --> 00:17:59,655
WHAT'RE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
408
00:17:59,862 --> 00:18:00,896
THESE LIES SOMEONE
WROTE ABOUT ME.
409
00:18:01,068 --> 00:18:02,896
[GASPING]
410
00:18:03,068 --> 00:18:04,344
Mr. Krabs: THANKS FOR
YOUR BUSINESS.
411
00:18:04,551 --> 00:18:06,310
AND HERE'S YOUR PAPER.
412
00:18:06,517 --> 00:18:07,689
MR. KRABS, CAN I HAVE
A WORD WITH YOU?
413
00:18:07,896 --> 00:18:10,000
MAKE IT QUICK, BOY.
414
00:18:10,172 --> 00:18:12,275
THESE PAPERS ARE SELLING FASTER
THAN WE CAN PRINT 'EM.
415
00:18:12,482 --> 00:18:14,586
THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED
TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT, SIR.
416
00:18:14,793 --> 00:18:16,551
I DON'T THINK THESE STORIES
ARE DOING ANYONE ANY GOOD.
417
00:18:16,758 --> 00:18:17,931
WELL, THEY'RE CERTAINLY
DOING ME SOME GOOD.
418
00:18:18,103 --> 00:18:19,344
CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?
419
00:18:19,551 --> 00:18:22,034
LOOK AT ALL THIS LOOT!
420
00:18:22,241 --> 00:18:27,379
YEAH, BUT ISN'T THERE A WAY
WE COULD WRITE JUICY STORIES
WITHOUT HURTING PEOPLE?
421
00:18:27,586 --> 00:18:29,275
[SIGHING]
422
00:18:29,482 --> 00:18:30,827
YOU JUST DON'T GET IT,
DO YOU, BOY?
423
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:33,241
WE'RE NOT HURTING ANYONE.
424
00:18:33,448 --> 00:18:35,689
WE'RE JUST MAKING THEIR LIVES
INTERESTING FOR EVERYBODY ELSE.
425
00:18:35,896 --> 00:18:37,551
NOW, GET OUT THERE
AND FETCH ANOTHER STORY.
426
00:18:40,586 --> 00:18:42,137
OH, KAREN.
427
00:18:42,344 --> 00:18:44,655
I THINK THIS IS IT.
428
00:18:44,862 --> 00:18:48,896
THE CHUM STICK THAT'S FINALLY
GONNA DRIVE KRABS
OUT OF BUSINESS.
429
00:18:49,068 --> 00:18:50,310
[LAUGHING]
430
00:18:50,517 --> 00:18:51,896
Male voice: I THINK NOT.
431
00:18:52,068 --> 00:18:54,000
I'M HEALTH INSPECTOR YELLOWTAIL.
432
00:18:54,206 --> 00:18:55,413
I'M OFFICIALLY CLOSING
DOWN YOUR RESTAURANT.
433
00:18:55,620 --> 00:18:56,862
WHY?
434
00:18:57,034 --> 00:18:58,137
I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING.
435
00:18:58,344 --> 00:18:59,689
[CHUCKLING]
436
00:18:59,896 --> 00:19:01,862
THAT'S NOT WHAT THIS SAYS.
437
00:19:02,034 --> 00:19:04,344
Plankton: PLANKTON'S CHUM
MADE OF YOUR CHUMS?
438
00:19:04,551 --> 00:19:06,586
THE CHUM BUCKET
SERVES YOUR FRIENDS
IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE?
439
00:19:06,793 --> 00:19:08,379
WHAT?
440
00:19:08,586 --> 00:19:10,172
WHO'S TO BLAME FOR THIS?
441
00:19:10,379 --> 00:19:11,689
WHO?
442
00:19:14,655 --> 00:19:16,517
[LAUGHING]
443
00:19:16,724 --> 00:19:19,103
YOU'RE REACHING NEW LEVELS
OF IMAGINATION, BOY-O.
444
00:19:19,310 --> 00:19:20,793
YEAH, I KNOW.
445
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:22,172
WHAT'S WRONG, BOY?
446
00:19:22,379 --> 00:19:23,551
YOU SICK OR SOMETHING?
447
00:19:23,758 --> 00:19:25,000
YES, MR. KRABS.
448
00:19:25,172 --> 00:19:26,413
YOU COULD SAY THAT.
449
00:19:26,620 --> 00:19:27,724
DON'T BE SILLY, BOY.
450
00:19:27,931 --> 00:19:29,310
WE'RE A SUCCESS!
451
00:19:29,517 --> 00:19:30,551
MR. KRABS, WE'RE HURTING PEOPLE.
452
00:19:30,758 --> 00:19:32,793
OH, BALONEY.
453
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:34,655
AND YOU BETTER START FEELIN'
RIGHT, 'CAUSE IF YOU DON'T
454
00:19:34,862 --> 00:19:36,068
YOU CAN JUST KISS
YOUR SPATULA GOODBYE.
455
00:19:36,275 --> 00:19:37,551
MR. KRABS, YOU WOULDN'T!
456
00:19:37,758 --> 00:19:39,517
OH, DARN TOOTIN', I WOULD.
457
00:19:39,724 --> 00:19:40,862
NOW GET OUT THERE
AND BRING ME A JUICY ONE.
458
00:19:41,034 --> 00:19:41,551
AYE-AYE, CAPTAIN.
459
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:49,310
SORRY, "FELLERS".
460
00:19:49,517 --> 00:19:50,758
THIS IS A PRIVATE TREE DOME.
461
00:19:50,965 --> 00:19:52,172
I HAD NO IDEA IT TALKED.
462
00:19:52,379 --> 00:19:54,103
DON'T WORRY.
463
00:19:54,310 --> 00:19:56,586
WE'RE FROM THE NEPTUNIAN
SCIENCE COMMITTEE
464
00:19:56,793 --> 00:20:00,103
AND WE'VE COME TO CONFISCATE
ALL YOUR SCIENCE AWARDS.
465
00:20:00,310 --> 00:20:01,551
HAVEN'T YOU READ
TODAY'S HEADLINES?
466
00:20:01,758 --> 00:20:03,551
IT CAN'T EVEN READ.
467
00:20:03,758 --> 00:20:04,965
WHY ARE YOU...
468
00:20:05,137 --> 00:20:06,448
OH, GIVE ME THAT!
469
00:20:06,655 --> 00:20:08,758
SANDY CHEEKS OR SANDY CHUMP?
470
00:20:08,965 --> 00:20:11,517
BUSHY-TAILED BRAINIAC REALLY
A SLOW-WITTED SQUIRREL?
471
00:20:11,724 --> 00:20:13,793
BY SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS?
472
00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:16,241
THAT YELLOW SIDEWINDER THINKS
HE CAN DO THAT TO ME?
473
00:20:16,448 --> 00:20:17,655
OH, BOY.
474
00:20:17,862 --> 00:20:19,655
WE'D BETTER SCRAM.
475
00:20:19,862 --> 00:20:20,931
THE DUMB ONES ARE ALWAYS
THE MOST VIOLENT.
476
00:20:21,103 --> 00:20:22,344
[GROWLING]
477
00:20:22,551 --> 00:20:27,068
[MR. KRABS LAUGHING]
478
00:20:27,275 --> 00:20:28,862
YOU'VE REALLY OUTDONE
YOURSELF THIS TIME.
479
00:20:29,034 --> 00:20:32,931
[LAUGHING]
480
00:20:33,103 --> 00:20:35,862
MR. KRABS, I CAN'T WRITE
THESE STORIES ANYMORE.
481
00:20:36,034 --> 00:20:37,931
COME ON,
THAT'S A BUNCH OF HOOEY.
482
00:20:38,103 --> 00:20:40,793
I'VE SEEN PEOPLE'S LIVES
RUINED WITH MY OWN EYES.
483
00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:43,000
PEOPLE WANT WILD, JUICY STORIES.
484
00:20:43,206 --> 00:20:45,655
THAT'S WHAT SELLS.
485
00:20:45,862 --> 00:20:48,758
NOW, I WANT YOUR LITTLE,
YELLOW NOGGIN TO COME UP
WITH THE WILDEST STORY EVER.
486
00:20:48,965 --> 00:20:51,206
ONE THAT'LL TOP ALL THE OTHERS.
487
00:20:51,413 --> 00:20:52,724
WELL, GEE, MR. KRABS,
I'VE WRITTEN ABOUT
EVERYONE IN TOWN.
488
00:20:52,931 --> 00:20:53,965
ANY IDEAS, SIR?
489
00:20:54,137 --> 00:20:55,344
SURPRISE ME.
490
00:20:55,551 --> 00:20:58,206
GIVE ME A SHOCKER.
491
00:20:58,413 --> 00:21:00,241
GOOD NIGHT, BOY.
492
00:21:00,448 --> 00:21:02,275
I'LL CHECK ON YOU
TOMORROW MORNING.
493
00:21:02,482 --> 00:21:03,620
AND REMEMBER,
THE WILDEST STORY EVER.
494
00:21:05,172 --> 00:21:06,896
AH, THE WILDEST STORY EVER, HUH?
495
00:21:11,551 --> 00:21:12,655
HOW'S IT GOIN', LAD?
496
00:21:16,275 --> 00:21:18,413
AH, IT'S A SURPRISE.
497
00:21:18,620 --> 00:21:20,000
Mr. Krabs: EXCELLENT.
498
00:21:20,172 --> 00:21:21,793
WE'RE GONNA SELL OUT IN NO TIME.
499
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:23,413
WE'LL HAVE TO DO
ANOTHER PRINTING.
500
00:21:23,620 --> 00:21:25,137
[GENERAL CONVERSATION]HUH?
501
00:21:25,344 --> 00:21:26,586
TASKMASTER!
502
00:21:26,793 --> 00:21:28,034
WHAT'S GOING ON?
503
00:21:28,241 --> 00:21:30,068
YOU SHOULD KNOW!
504
00:21:30,275 --> 00:21:31,517
KRABS OVERWORKS EMPLOYEES?
505
00:21:31,724 --> 00:21:33,655
REAPS REWARD?
506
00:21:33,862 --> 00:21:36,275
KRABBY KRONICLE MASTERMIND
BEHIND BOGUS STORIES
507
00:21:36,482 --> 00:21:39,517
PAYS HIS TIRED,
UNDERAGE REPORTER PENNIES
WHILE HE RAKES IN THE DOUGH?
508
00:21:39,724 --> 00:21:42,551
HOW COULD YOU DO THAT
TO SUCH AN INNOCENT CHILD?
509
00:21:42,758 --> 00:21:45,379
IT'S SICK AND INHUMANE.
510
00:21:45,586 --> 00:21:48,724
NOT TO MENTION THE FACT
THAT HE'S WRITTEN LIES ABOUT US.
511
00:21:48,931 --> 00:21:51,758
I LOST MY RESTAURANT
BECAUSE OF YOU.
512
00:21:51,965 --> 00:21:54,000
AND I THOUGHT IWAS EVIL.
513
00:21:54,206 --> 00:21:56,482
ALL THE KIDS IN TOWN WANT
TO BEAT ME UP FOR LUNCH MONEY.
514
00:21:56,689 --> 00:21:58,827
[SOBBING]
515
00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:02,275
AND I'VE HAD TO GO BACK
TO WATCHING DAYTIME TELEVISION.
516
00:22:02,482 --> 00:22:03,862
THAT'S IT!
517
00:22:04,034 --> 00:22:05,448
WE'RE TAKING OUR MONEY BACK!
518
00:22:05,655 --> 00:22:08,000
[ALL TALKING AT ONCE]
519
00:22:08,172 --> 00:22:09,586
[MR. KRABS SCREAMING]
520
00:22:09,793 --> 00:22:11,000
[SOBBING]
521
00:22:11,172 --> 00:22:13,000
MR. KRABS, ARE YOU OK?
522
00:22:13,172 --> 00:22:16,034
HOW CAN I BE OK
WHEN ME MONEY'S GONE?
523
00:22:16,241 --> 00:22:17,310
[SOBBING]
524
00:22:17,517 --> 00:22:19,000
ALL GONE.
525
00:22:19,172 --> 00:22:23,517
[SOBBING]
526
00:22:23,724 --> 00:22:27,172
IT JUST GOES TO SHOW,
TRYING TO MAKE AN EASY BUCK
DOESN'T PAY.
527
00:22:30,172 --> 00:22:30,413
OR DOES IT?
528
00:22:40,103 --> 00:22:41,620
GET ME SOME SCISSORS, BOY-O.
529
00:22:41,827 --> 00:22:43,793
IT'S TIME TO USE MYIMAGINATION.
530
00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:46,000
Patrick: HEY, GUYS?
531
00:22:46,206 --> 00:22:48,068
CAN YOU FIX ME AND THE WIFE UP
A COUPLE OF KRABBY PATTIES?
532
00:22:51,137 --> 00:22:56,517
[♪...]
533
00:23:33,344 --> 00:23:37,344
[CHILDREN LAUGHING]
36810
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