All language subtitles for SpongeBob SquarePants 1999 S02 E01

?Are you ready, kids-

!KIDS: Aye, aye, Captain

.I can't hear you-

!KIDS: Aye, aye, Captain

THEME SONG: Oh, who lives in
?a pineapple under the sea

!SpongeBob SquarePants

Absorbent and yellow
.and porous is he

!SpongeBob SquarePants

If nautical nonsense
.be something you wish

!SpongeBob SquarePants

,Then drop on the deck
!and flop like a fish

!SpongeBob SquarePants

?Ready

.SpongeBob Squares

.SpongeBob SquarePants

.SpongeBob SquarePants

!SpongeBob SquarePants

[LAUGHING]

!Wow-

.It's Sunday, Gary

.Guess what's for breakfast

[MEOWING]

.That's right

.A sundae

.Whoops

Looks like we're
.out of ice cream

Guess I'll have to
.use something else

!Ketchup

[GROANING]

.Hm

.Bananas, cherries

.Boring

.Ah, here we go

.Onions

?Ready, Gary

[MEOWING]

[PLAYING VIOLIN]

.Just one more thing

!Peanuts

Gary, our peanuts
.jar is totally empty

[BURPING]

.Hm

.Wait

I know one other place
.we can find peanuts

Good thing I still
have these peanut

plants growing in
.the windowsill

[BUZZING]

.A little texture never hurt

.There we go

This sundae's going
.to taste great

Aren't you going
?to help me, Gary

?Gary

.Oh, well

.More for me

.Ah

.Mm

.You know what they say, Gary

.I'm easy like Sunday morning

.OK, let's see my to do list

,Go to work, go to work
.go to work, go to work

.No, that's not right

.I need the one for Sunday

.Ah, here we go

Say hi to everyone
.in Bikini Bottom

.Hello

Some people are
.even late on Sunday

.Hi, Mail Fish

[SNIFFING]

[WHISTLE BLOWING]

.Hi, Mrs. Crossing Guard

!Mother of mercy-

[HORN HONKING]

[SCREAMING]

[CRASHING]

!Oh-

!Wow, a parade

.Hi, parade

.Hi, tuba player

.Hi, drummer

.Hi, guy with the cymbals

.Hi, trumpeter

.Hi, tambourine girl

.Hi, timbali man

.Hi, didgeridoo player

.Hi, triangle player

.Hi, guy with the kettledrum

.Hi, pianist

.Hi, guy with the flute

!And hello, Dolly

!My leg-

!Oh, my-

[SCREAMING]

?Was is something I said-

Something weird
.is going on today

.Everyone's running away from me

And now giant
?piles of bubblegum

?Oh, what next

.Hi, SpongeBob-

.Oh, hi, Patrick-

.I'm confused

.Yes, I am-

Patrick, everyone is-
.running away from me

.Watch

.Hi, building

.I just don't get it

.I don't either-

Maybe it's the way
.you're dressed

.Nah-

.Maybe it's your voice-

[LAUGHING]

.Good one, Patrick-

Well, maybe it's just-
.because you're ugly

?Ugly-

.You gotta be kidding me

.Better try the reflection test-

.Hi-

.Ugly-

!Oh, no-

!I can't be ugly

!I can't be

.I can't be ugly

?Am I ugly

[SCREAMING]

?Am I ugly

!My eyes-

!My eyes

[GROANING]

!I'm ugly-

SpongeBob, can I-
?borrow some bath beads

[ORGAN MUSIC PLAYING]

?SpongeBob

.Go-

.Run away like all the others

No one would want a
.friend as ugly as I am

.Sure they would-

It makes them feel better
.about the way they look

.Maybe a story will cheer you up

".It's called "The Ugly Barnacle

Once, there was
.an ugly barnacle

He was so ugly
.that everyone died

.The end

.That didn't help at all-

?How long

How long have I
?been ugly, Patrick

.As long as I can remember-

.You poor ugly thing, you

!Help me-

.I'm so ashamed

!I'm spiralling

!I'm spiralling

.Thanks, Patrick

.It's OK, Patrick

.Spiralling over

Just do what I do-
.when I have problems

!SCREAMING) Scream)

.Come on, buddy

.I'll help you

.OK now, say it

.Say it

.I can't-

SpongeBob, you're never-
going to feel better

until you get this
.thing off your chest

.I know, Patrick-

.Say it-

.Say it

.I'm ugly-

?You're ugly and what-

?Square-

.No-

.Proud

.I'm ugly, and I'm proud-

!Good-

.Say it louder

.I'm ugly, and I'm proud-

.Louder-

!I'm ugly, and I'm proud-

!PATRICK: Louder

SPONGEBOB: I'm
!ugly, and I'm proud

SCREAMING) I am)
!ugly, and I'm proud

!I'm ugly, and I'm proud

?Is that what he calls it-

[PANTING]

!That felt great-

.I feel empowered

?So what do you want to do now-

.I don't know-

?How about a movie

[MUSIC PLAYING]

.Pardon me

.Ugly sponge coming through

.People respect self-esteem-

.Hi-

I'm very ugly, but you should
.enjoy the movie anyway

.Excuse me, sir

I hope my horrible ugliness
.won't be a distraction to you

.Not at all, boy-

[SCREAMING]

[RUNNING]

Don't worry about-
.him, SpongeBob

--He's just a

[CRYING]

.SpongeBob

?SpongeBob, what's wrong

[SNIFFING]

.I can't do this, Patrick-

I've tried, and I've
tried, but-- I'm

not always as
.confident as I look

Maybe I better just
.go back and hide

?What is wrong with you people-

Afraid to look
?ugliness in the face

!Well, here

!Look at it

?It's ugly, isn't it

!You look at it

.Hello-

!You look at it-

.Hi-

!Look at it-

!Look at it

!Look at it

Look at it! (SCREAMING) I
!want all of you to look at it

[SCREAMING]

.They all ran away, Patrick-

I bet there's no-
.line at the snack bar

?Hello

?Hello

.They must be on break

.Oh, wait, Patrick-

.I just remembered

I've got some of my peanut
.onion sundae we can share

.That looks great-

[SLURPING]

.Ah

[RATTLING]

.Oh

.I gotta go to the restroom

.I'm out of soap

--Could I borrow

!Stay back-

--Uh, I just want some-

.Here-

.Here's my money

.Take it

.Take it, and go away

.My hands aren't that dirty-

.Hey

Hey, do you guys want
?to hear a bathroom joke

[GAGGING]

?You trying to kill us-

.Oh, that's ridiculous-

!Oh-

!Oh

!I got the ugly

Patrick, is-
?everything OK in here

[CRYING]

What are you doing
?in there, Patrick

?Wouldn't you like to know-

And why is that-
?bag on your head

?Why-

.Oh, no reason

!Except you gave me the ugly

[SCREAMING]

?Well, what am I going to do

I can't go out
.looking like this

Just remember what-
.we talked about

.There's power in pride

That may be fine-
for you, but I was

.one of the beautiful people

!Now look at me

!I'm almost as ugly as you

[SNIFFING]

I always thought, if I
,was as ugly as that guy

.I don't know what I would do

.Patrick-

?What's my mom going to say-

.Patrick-

Oh, my gosh, if my-
.sister finds out

.Patrick-

Oh, wait, I don't-
.have a sister

,If the bank-- oh, I mean
it's one thing if you have

bad shoes or even
--bad hair, but

!Patrick-

.You're not ugly

.Your breath stinks

.Really bad

[SIGHING]

.What a relief-

[SCREAMING]

,Gah, barnacles, Patrick-
?what did you eat

,Oh, some roast beef-
.some chicken, a pizza

.No, I mean, just the morning-

,Some roast beef-
.some chicken, a pizza

?What else-

Well, I had some-
.of your sundae

.Sundae-

Patrick, my sundae
.gave us rancid breath

?What do you mean-

.I mean, we're not ugly-

.We just stink

?Stink-

[CHEERING]

!We stink-

!We stink

!We stink

!We stink

!We stink

!We stink

!We stink

!We stink

!We stink

!We stink

!Oh, guess what, Squidward-

!We stink-

!Ah, yeah-

!Yes

!I stink-

!PATRICK: I reek

!SPONGEBOB: Smell me

[MUSIC PLAYING]

!MR. KRABS: Attention

!Attention

All Krusty Krew
!employees, attention

Get the anchors out of your
.pants and report to me office

.That will be all

I have an important
.announcement to make

!Ooh-

!Hooray

!The new spatulas are here

.Sit down, boy-

.There's no new spatulas

.How disappointing-

You men know me-
.daughter, Pearl

.She's growing up fast

It seems like it
was just yesterday

I was teaching
.her how to breach

.Me mammalian angel

[CLEARING THROAT]

Anyway, uh, so she's
going to be working

.here during her summer vacation

She's got a lot of
fresh ideas to bring

.in some hungry customers

[DOOR OPENING]

!PEARL: Hello

?Daddy

!There she blows-

SpongeBob, do you-
?realise what this means

.No new spatulas-

!No-

It means some bratty
teenager's coming

.in here to tell us what to do

.We can't have that

?We have seniority, right

.Right-

So we'll work together to-
.protect our pathetic positions

.Okie dokie, Squidward-

And then we'll get
.those new spatulas

.All right, men-

.Say hello to me Pearl

.Hello, Pole-

.Hi, guys-

It makes me jolly-
as a roger to finally

have you aboard the
.family business

Great, Dad, because I-
.have so many new ideas

.I can smell the money already-

I'll be in my office
.if you need me

?What's in the box-

.It's a surprise-

.I like surprises-

.Great-

.Then close your eyes

!I'm ready-

.Well, I like it so far-

!Ta-da-

[GASPING]

It's the new Krusty
.Krew uniform

[LAUGHING]

.I designed it myself

.OK, this is it, SpongeBob-

Now tell her how you really
.feel about that uniform

.OK, Squidward-

Pearl, this is the
!greatest uniform ever

.Fish paste-

Oh, SpongeBob, you-
.look so adorable

.I could just eat you up

Sorry, Pearl, this-
.item's not on the menu

Well, I didn't think it-
,was possible, SpongeBob

but you look even more
.ridiculous than usual

PEARL: Don't be
.jealous, Uncle Squiddy

.I made one for you, too

!Don't bother-

.Only a fool would wear that

.Avast, ye shipmates-

Don't these just
?shiver your timbers

.Get that suit on, sailor

.It's already been paid for

.Rage-

.Fury

.Irritation

.Humiliation

.Squidward is such a barnacle-

.A stick in the sand-

.But not you, SpongeBob-

.You are full of style

?Me-

?Really

.Totally, SB-

.You ooze fashion

And I've got some
completely coro

.concepts for this old joint

And I'm going to need someone
with your kind of talent

.to help me

Well, I have been-
trying to get Mr. Krabs

to make some
.changes around here

Why, with my girlish instincts-
,and your, um, sponginess

we'll turn this worn out lunch
.waggon into a teenage paradise

SpongeBob, what do
--you like better

the Kutie Krab or
?the Kooky Krab

?For what-

.Dare I ask

.The new name for our new look-

I mean, the Krusty
.Krab has got to go

Who wants to eat at a
?place they think is crusty

.Blech

Well, sure, it's-
,a terrible name

.but this is a terrible place

Therefore, the name
.should be left alone

?Right, SpongeBob

!I got it-

?How about the Chaotic Crab

.Hm-

?How about the Kissy Krab

.The King Krab-

.The Candy Crab-

The Cool Crab or-
.the Cowboy Crab

.The Curly Crab

.The Creepy Crab

.The Killer Krab

[GASPING]

.No-

.You're right-

.Too scary

.Hm

!The Kuddly Krab-

.Aww

[LAUGHING]

[GROANING]

It's a shame old man-
.Krab sold the Krusty Krab

.It's a darn shame-

Hey, lady, do you
know where we can

get something to
?eat around here

!That's it I quit-

[WHISTLE BLOWING]

Finally a cool place for teens-
.to just, you know, hang out

.Pearl, you're a genius-

,All these young
.hip new customers

.Phooey on Squidward

.He can't keep up with the times

.You're a true visionary, Pearl

.Thank you, SpongeBob-

.I do have 20/20 vision

Well, hip people-
.have to eat, too

.Back to the grill

,The customers may be hot
.but my grill is hotter

[HISSING]

.PEARL: SpongeBob, order up

.Two salads-

.Never heard of it

.I gotta stay hip

I don't want to end up
.like silly old Squidward

But what in the name of Davy
?Jones's locker is a salad

.Here you go

.Two salads

.Ew, gross-

.Those aren't salads

.Take those back

Remove the bun, the
.patty and the condiments

But that leaves just-
.lettuce and tomato

.Exactly-

.All right-

.OK

.No buns

.That's hip

.No patties

.Happening

Oh, yeah, that's definitely
.the coolest meal I ever saw

.This is so cool-

.Two salads-

.That was awful

I hope I never
have to tear apart

a perfectly good Krabby
.Patty ever again

I don't think my
.heart can take it

[SCREAMING]

?Where's the grill

,Come on, SpongeBob-
.you're a hip guy

You know fried foods
.are O-U-T, out

.Uh, right on-

Check out this new-
.menu I came up with

.Salad and tea-

But where are the
?Krabby patties

.Oh, silly, those aren't hip-

Oh, you won't be needing
.that thing anymore

[SCREAMING]

--B--b--b-

PEARL: I've got something more
.fun for you to do, anyway

?Hey, buddy, you need a ride-

I was just on my way to
.the big doofus convention

[LAUGHING]

.This is humiliating-

.I'm a fry cook, darn it

,You can take away my spatula
but when you take away

my dignity, that's
!when I get mad

I'm going to march right into
Mr. Krabs's office and tell him

.this is just too much

.Oh

[GROANING]

.OK, SpongeBob, you can do this

.Come on

?Mr. Krabs, could I talk to you

.Come on in, me boy-

.Have a seat

.Thanks, Mr. Krabs-

Don't you just-
?love me new office

.Pearlie designed it for me

Mr. Krabs, uh, I think-
.we've got a problem

Isn't that the neatest-
?40 chair you ever sat in$

Sure, Mr. Krabs, but-
.I've got some bad news

How about my cuddly-
?executive bunny

Reduces stress for only
.five easy payment of $9.95

Mr. Krabs, Pearl is-
.ruining the Krusty Krab

?What-

Why, Peal is saving
.the Krustry Krab

.I mean, the Kuddly Krab

What would we do without
these beautiful $20 sea

?unicorn wall hangers

How could we have ever survived
?without these $35 heart lights

How could we go on wit a sea
?fern on every last table

!It's hip

!It's coro

!It's-- it's losing money

Ah, you're right, SpongeBob, but
.I can't fire me pride and joy

It would break her
.fragile little heart

?What am I going to do

[CRYING]

.There, there, Mr. Krabs-

.I'm sure there's another way

.That's it, boy-

?What's it-

.You could fire her-

.It's OK if she hates you

.That's not what I said, sir-

.Great then, it's all settled-

.You fire Pearlie

.I'll hide in the office

.Totally rude, SpongeBob-

Pearl, could I see you in-
?the kitchen for a second

.Sure, SpongeBob-

VOICEOVER) How am I)-
?going to break it to her

.I've never fired anyone before

.Well, I just got to say it

.Pearl, you're fired

.OK, here it goes

[INHALING]

[CRYING]

.Oh, SpongeBob-

.I can't take it anymore

.Nothing I do is working

.Sure, it is, Pearl-

Look at all the hip, young
.people eating salads

.No-

?Don't you get it

I've been trying to get
.fired since day one

I was only pretending to like
.this place to please Daddy

This job is cutting majorly
.into my social life

?Oh, SpongeBob, what should I do

.I've got it-

.I could pretend to fire you

I'll take the heat from
.old man Krabs later

Gosh, you'd really-
?do that for me

.You're a great pal, SpongeBob

?How can I ever thank you

Stop trying to-
.break me in half

.Deal-

.Oh, boy

.Oh, boy

.WHISPERING) OK, Pearl)-

We've got to make
.this convincing

Pearl, I need to
.have a word with you

[CRYING]

.Oh, no-

.Here it goes

I don't know if I
.can bear to listen

It's not that you haven't-
.done a good job around here

--It's just that

Oh, don't be too-
.hard on her now

?Why does it have to be this way

.It's for the best

Well, we feel it might be in-
--everybody's best interest if

.I can't let him do this-

?Huh

!Get on with it, SpongeBob

.Pearl, you're fire-

[SCREAMING]

.Thanks, SpongeBob-

.Come on, gang

!The mall waits

!Hey, Mr. Krabs, I did it-

[SCREAMING]

.Oh, Pearlie-

?Is that a 20

Oh, SpongeBob, how
could we have done

such a thing to me
?own flesh and blood

.There, there, Mr. Krabs-

.Pearl took it just fine

In fact, she seemed
.kind of happy

?Really-

She's off to bigger-
.and better things

That's me girl, tough as-
.nails, just like her old man

But how am I going to get my
?money back for all this stuff

.Hm-

[MUSIC PLAYING]

!Woo

!Yeah

[LAUGHING]

[YELLING]

!All right

?Isn't this great, Gary

And it only cost me
.one year's salary

[MEOWING]

[MUSIC PLAYING]