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All language subtitles for [SubtitleTools.com] Weird.Science.1985.2160p.4K.BluRay.x265.10bit.AAC5.1-[YTS.MX]_track3_[eng]-eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:23,774 --> 00:00:26,235 This is so beautiful. 2 00:00:27,319 --> 00:00:29,321 You know it, Gary. 3 00:00:30,739 --> 00:00:32,157 Look at her. 4 00:00:39,748 --> 00:00:42,292 Do you know what I would like to do? 5 00:00:42,417 --> 00:00:44,336 Shower with them. 6 00:00:44,795 --> 00:00:48,924 Then, bang! We hit the city, baby, dead on. 7 00:00:50,134 --> 00:00:53,929 For a little drinks, a little nightlife, a little dancing. 8 00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:55,139 Dancing. 9 00:00:55,264 --> 00:00:58,350 We throw a huge party, I mean, huge party. 10 00:00:58,475 --> 00:01:02,396 Everybody's invited, women everywhere. 11 00:01:02,521 --> 00:01:05,649 All these girls, they're all there. 12 00:01:05,774 --> 00:01:07,693 - Naked bodies everywhere. - Gary. 13 00:01:07,818 --> 00:01:09,570 - They all know my name. - Gary! 14 00:01:09,695 --> 00:01:13,824 - What? - Nobody likes us. Nobody. 15 00:01:14,992 --> 00:01:17,494 Why are you messing with the fantasy? 16 00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:22,207 We know about the reality. Don't ruin the fantasy, OK? 17 00:01:23,709 --> 00:01:28,255 And then, we're hip, man. We're popular. We're revered. 18 00:01:28,380 --> 00:01:30,716 - Man... - We're studs. 19 00:01:32,926 --> 00:01:36,096 When the smoke clears, right, 20 00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:40,142 those two dames 21 00:01:40,267 --> 00:01:44,813 fall amazingly, completely and totally in love with us, Wyatt. 22 00:01:46,273 --> 00:01:47,733 Check it out. 23 00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:52,362 Yo! Check us out! 24 00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:13,967 Look, we're sorry about... 25 00:03:37,926 --> 00:03:40,679 'Down. Down, you fool." 26 00:03:43,849 --> 00:03:46,268 You know, this isn't very scary, Gary. 27 00:03:47,436 --> 00:03:50,522 "I Spit On Your Grave" is scary. This is, um... 28 00:03:51,148 --> 00:03:53,483 It's very mild. It's timid, you know. 29 00:03:53,608 --> 00:03:56,611 The old stuff is more funny than scary. 30 00:03:56,737 --> 00:04:00,240 I believe the word is "camp". It's campy. 31 00:04:01,199 --> 00:04:03,744 "The moon's rising. We've no time to lose.' 32 00:04:03,869 --> 00:04:06,455 You ever see "Dawn of the Dead"? "Dawn of the Dead" scared me. 33 00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:10,417 It really scared me. I slept with my parents for a week, OK? 34 00:04:10,542 --> 00:04:12,127 I had to call my grandmother in the night 35 00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:14,338 to discuss my childhood with her for three hours. 36 00:04:14,463 --> 00:04:16,298 I was really petrified. 37 00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:23,972 'He's just resting, waiting for a new life to come.' 38 00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:27,726 That would've been so much cooler if Dr. Frankenstein had made a girl. 39 00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:35,817 Don't burn the butter, alright? Ticks me off. 40 00:04:42,866 --> 00:04:47,162 I mean... I personally would've made a girl, you know. 41 00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:49,706 They did make a girl, "The Bride of Frankenstein". 42 00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:52,751 - I think it was released in '35. - It was '34, alright? 43 00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:56,546 She was a scag, Wyatt, she had, like, electric hair. 44 00:04:56,671 --> 00:04:59,466 If they made her beautiful, she wouldn't go out with the monster. 45 00:05:00,092 --> 00:05:01,843 That's a good point. 46 00:05:16,691 --> 00:05:19,694 '...his insane ambition to create life. 47 00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:23,031 - Where'd your parents go, anyway? - Cincinnati. 48 00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:26,034 They're meeting the guy that my sister wants to marry. 49 00:05:27,119 --> 00:05:30,247 Chloe? Who the hell would marry Chloe? 50 00:05:30,372 --> 00:05:32,374 He's studying to be a vet. 51 00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:37,170 Try not to make a mess in there, Gary. The maid doesn't come till Monday. 52 00:05:37,295 --> 00:05:38,839 I don't understand something, Wyatt. 53 00:05:38,964 --> 00:05:41,842 How come your parents trust you? They never let you do shit before. 54 00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:45,011 Chet's coming home from college for the weekend. They trust him. 55 00:05:45,137 --> 00:05:46,763 He's in charge. 56 00:05:46,888 --> 00:05:49,391 Chet? Oh, shit! 57 00:05:50,142 --> 00:05:52,060 I can't believe this, Wyatt. 58 00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:55,397 I really wish that you told me this before I agreed to sleep over. 59 00:05:55,522 --> 00:05:58,733 You know how I feel about Chet. How do you put up with that guy? 60 00:05:58,859 --> 00:06:01,069 If I don't, he beats the shit out of me. 61 00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:03,071 It's a habit he picked up in military school. 62 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:04,739 How do you put up with that putz? 63 00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:06,867 What can I say? He's very protective of me. 64 00:06:07,534 --> 00:06:09,161 Nice relationship. 65 00:06:09,286 --> 00:06:12,622 '...there you have his mad dream. 66 00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:17,794 'Look! There's nothing to fear. 67 00:06:17,919 --> 00:06:24,134 ‘Look... no blood, no decay, just a few stitches. 68 00:06:24,259 --> 00:06:26,678 'Go on. Fix the electrodes. 69 00:06:26,803 --> 00:06:30,182 "You'll have plenty to be afraid of before the night's over. 70 00:06:30,307 --> 00:06:32,309 "The storm will be magnificent. 71 00:06:32,434 --> 00:06:34,936 'All the electrical secrets of heaven. 72 00:06:36,188 --> 00:06:39,274 ‘And this time we're ready. Hey, Fritz? 73 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:42,110 'Let's have one final test. Throw the switches.' 74 00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:50,160 'Here in this machine, I have discovered the great ray 75 00:06:50,285 --> 00:06:53,246 'that first brought life into the world. 76 00:06:53,371 --> 00:06:55,749 'And, look, here's the final touch. 77 00:06:58,627 --> 00:07:02,130 "The brain you stole, Fritz. Think of it. 78 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:05,425 "The brain of a dead man waiting to live again 79 00:07:05,550 --> 00:07:08,970 'in a body I made with my own hands...' 80 00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:11,723 - You know, that's not a bad idea. - What? 81 00:07:11,848 --> 00:07:14,309 'In 15 minutes, the storm should be at its height...' 82 00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:16,269 Making a girl. 83 00:07:19,689 --> 00:07:22,067 Actually making a girl. 84 00:07:23,526 --> 00:07:25,278 Just like Frankenstein. 85 00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:27,822 Except cuter. 86 00:07:33,578 --> 00:07:36,122 - You're serious. - Yes. 87 00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:41,378 Look me in the eyes. 88 00:07:41,503 --> 00:07:43,296 Do I look serious? 89 00:07:43,421 --> 00:07:46,341 - 'You're crazy!" - 'Crazy, am I? 90 00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:49,427 ‘We'll see whether I'm crazy or not.' 91 00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:53,473 Gary Wallace, that's absolutely gross. That's sick. 92 00:07:53,598 --> 00:07:55,767 I'm not digging up dead girls. It's... 93 00:07:58,895 --> 00:08:02,691 No, I'm not talking about digging up a dead girl, Wyatt. 94 00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:05,235 I'm talking about your system, idiot. Your computer. 95 00:08:06,653 --> 00:08:09,030 OK, you know how you're always talking how you can simulate all that stuff 96 00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:11,658 on your computer, you know? 97 00:08:11,783 --> 00:08:14,286 What's the difference? Why can't we simulate a girl? 98 00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:17,914 I don't know. I guess I could, but why? 99 00:08:18,039 --> 00:08:21,501 It's two-dimensional on the screen. It's not flesh and blood, Gary. 100 00:08:21,626 --> 00:08:25,672 I know that, but we can use it, Wyatt. We can ask it questions. 101 00:08:25,797 --> 00:08:28,425 We can put it in real-life sexual situations and see how it reacts. 102 00:08:28,550 --> 00:08:30,885 Like real sick, demented shit. You'd love it. 103 00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:34,764 Well, what about your girl in, um... Canada? 104 00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:38,977 She lives in Canada. This girl has no morals. I don't like that in a girl. 105 00:08:39,102 --> 00:08:41,396 It's rough having those kind of relationships. You'll see. 106 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:43,523 Anyway, get to work. 107 00:08:49,112 --> 00:08:50,447 Very nice. 108 00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:58,621 I'm telling you, Wyatt. If there's one thing I know, it's female stats. 109 00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:02,042 Anything bigger than a handful, you're risking a sprained tongue. 110 00:09:02,167 --> 00:09:03,918 You know, and... 111 00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:05,420 - Yeah. - Yeah. 112 00:09:07,630 --> 00:09:10,759 - Perfect. - OK. Now what? 113 00:09:12,260 --> 00:09:14,554 Should we give her a brain? 114 00:09:14,679 --> 00:09:17,849 - Yeah. We can play chess with her. - Chess? 115 00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:20,393 Just give her a brain, OK? 116 00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:32,781 OK, that's about all we can do with my stuff. 117 00:09:32,906 --> 00:09:36,117 I can't believe this shit. I can't believe this. 118 00:09:36,242 --> 00:09:38,370 Did you get a free toaster with this, too? 119 00:09:38,495 --> 00:09:40,663 Gary, it's smarter than you, OK? 120 00:09:40,789 --> 00:09:43,792 - The problem is, it's a lame idea, OK? - It's not a lame idea. 121 00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:46,711 The problem is your computer's a wimp and we need a lot more power than this. 122 00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:48,380 What do you suggest? 123 00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:54,177 'We have code penetration, we have program entry. 124 00:09:54,302 --> 00:09:57,055 'I repeat, we have code penetration, we have program entry. 125 00:10:06,106 --> 00:10:08,483 ‘Activate LAN trace.' 126 00:10:45,520 --> 00:10:46,855 We're in. 127 00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:48,815 We're in trouble, Gary. 128 00:10:48,940 --> 00:10:50,775 This is highly illegal. 129 00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:53,820 Well, you need more input. We got to fill this thing up with data. 130 00:10:53,945 --> 00:10:56,573 We gotta make her as real as possible, Wyatt. 131 00:10:56,698 --> 00:10:59,701 I want her to live, I want her to breathe. 132 00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:01,995 I want her to aerobicize. 133 00:11:37,155 --> 00:11:39,949 "It's live! All Dave, all night! 134 00:11:40,408 --> 00:11:46,498 "We know what you need. Only right here on Dave TV!" 135 00:11:47,499 --> 00:11:50,251 Look at this. It's moving, it's working. It's doing itself. 136 00:11:50,376 --> 00:11:52,045 It's working by itself. 137 00:12:11,898 --> 00:12:14,734 - Gary? 138 00:12:15,777 --> 00:12:18,905 By the way, why are we wearing bras on our heads? 139 00:12:19,656 --> 00:12:20,990 Ceremonial. 140 00:12:29,791 --> 00:12:32,794 - You ready? - Yeah. Let's go. 141 00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:38,800 - Turn it off! - It is off! 142 00:12:43,846 --> 00:12:46,307 Hang up the phone! 143 00:12:55,692 --> 00:12:58,111 - Wyatt, what's going on? - I don't know! 144 00:12:58,236 --> 00:13:00,488 - Well, unplug it! 145 00:13:04,784 --> 00:13:06,244 Oh, shit! 146 00:13:18,881 --> 00:13:21,259 No! It was a birthday present! 147 00:13:25,555 --> 00:13:27,098 Oh, shit! 148 00:13:29,058 --> 00:13:30,560 - Oh, my God! - Oh, my God! 149 00:13:30,685 --> 00:13:33,730 Oh, shit! We got to get this thing out of your house! 150 00:13:33,855 --> 00:13:35,773 You get it out! It was your idea! 151 00:13:35,857 --> 00:13:37,817 This is all your fault, you son of a bitch! 152 00:13:37,942 --> 00:13:40,278 Hit the lights out! You get it out! 153 00:13:40,361 --> 00:13:41,946 I'll get it out! 154 00:14:04,469 --> 00:14:06,763 - Whoa! - Aargh! 155 00:14:08,097 --> 00:14:09,974 Ah, shit! 156 00:14:40,755 --> 00:14:42,173 One, two, three. 157 00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:48,262 'She's alive. Alive!" 158 00:14:54,852 --> 00:14:59,941 So... what would you little maniacs like to do first? 159 00:15:04,987 --> 00:15:08,700 You guys created me. I didn't come from anywhere. 160 00:15:08,825 --> 00:15:12,912 Before you started messing around with your computer, I didn't even exist. 161 00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:20,628 By the way... you did an excellent job. Thank you. 162 00:15:25,216 --> 00:15:26,634 Hello? 163 00:15:30,096 --> 00:15:32,098 Showering's real fun, isn't it? 164 00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:41,149 If we're going to have any kind of fun together, 165 00:15:42,525 --> 00:15:44,610 you guys had better loosen up. 166 00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:54,078 What are we going to do with her? 167 00:15:54,203 --> 00:15:57,874 Look... we'll just go with the situation, OK? 168 00:15:57,999 --> 00:15:59,834 I'm sure by Sunday, you'll think of something. 169 00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:02,462 You're a very bright guy. I have a lot of faith in you, OK? 170 00:16:02,587 --> 00:16:05,465 - Alright? - I'm just being practical. 171 00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:07,967 Well, I know you are, OK? And I appreciate it. 172 00:16:08,092 --> 00:16:09,343 Let's go. 173 00:16:10,261 --> 00:16:12,138 What are we going to do about this mess? 174 00:16:12,263 --> 00:16:15,057 Wyatt, you'll have plenty of time to clean up tomorrow, OK? 175 00:16:15,183 --> 00:16:18,770 OK, but don't get any B.O. on Chet's suit, or he'll kill me. 176 00:16:22,023 --> 00:16:23,775 - Where are we going, anyway? - I dunno. 177 00:16:23,900 --> 00:16:27,445 She said we're going to go downtown... Oh, my God! Whose stuff is this? 178 00:16:27,570 --> 00:16:29,530 - Is that your suit? Wait, is this yours? - Oh, shit. 179 00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:32,992 Holy shit! Wyatt, what's going on here? 180 00:16:33,117 --> 00:16:34,994 - Gary, I don't know! - I don't know what's going on here! 181 00:16:35,119 --> 00:16:36,496 You look good, though, alright? 182 00:16:36,621 --> 00:16:37,955 - Yeah? - Yeah. 183 00:16:44,587 --> 00:16:48,174 - So, did you steal this car? - No, I didn't steal the car. 184 00:16:48,299 --> 00:16:50,760 How'd you get it? 185 00:16:50,885 --> 00:16:53,262 I can get anything I want. 186 00:16:53,387 --> 00:16:56,557 - And right now, I want to party. - Party? 187 00:16:56,682 --> 00:17:00,228 Yeah, and you better think up a name for me, too. 188 00:17:00,353 --> 00:17:02,188 What name do you want? 189 00:17:02,313 --> 00:17:05,399 You guys created me, you think of a name for me. 190 00:17:05,525 --> 00:17:07,026 How about Lisa? 191 00:17:07,151 --> 00:17:08,569 Why Lisa? 192 00:17:10,071 --> 00:17:11,697 Why not? 193 00:17:11,823 --> 00:17:16,410 - He used to like a girl named Lisa. - Oh, yeah? Old girlfriend? 194 00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:18,329 She kicked him in the nuts. 195 00:17:19,831 --> 00:17:21,749 Will you shut up? 196 00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:24,961 Look, Gary, it wasn't your fault. All you said was hello to her. 197 00:17:25,086 --> 00:17:27,129 Yeah, look, Wyatt, shut up! 198 00:17:28,256 --> 00:17:32,218 Hey, guys, I like Lisa. That'll do just fine. 199 00:17:35,221 --> 00:17:37,390 OK, you guys ready to rock? 200 00:17:37,515 --> 00:17:39,183 - Ready. - Ready. 201 00:18:04,041 --> 00:18:06,210 - Lisa? - Yeah? 202 00:18:07,545 --> 00:18:12,049 - I don't think we belong here. - Don't be silly. It's a public place. 203 00:18:15,887 --> 00:18:19,891 Look, I'm sure we'd both love to stay, but we're not 21, so I think... 204 00:18:20,016 --> 00:18:23,102 You're 21. You're 21. 205 00:18:26,522 --> 00:18:29,859 Well, maybe you'd feel better if you just got out there and mingled. 206 00:18:29,984 --> 00:18:32,111 We don't mingle, OK? 207 00:18:32,987 --> 00:18:35,990 Well, maybe you'd be comfortable if I invited all these people 208 00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:40,494 back to your house and we could all mingle there. 209 00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:42,455 - We'll mingle. - We'll mingle. 210 00:18:47,168 --> 00:18:48,628 Hi, dudes. 211 00:19:00,431 --> 00:19:02,183 Well, goddamn! 212 00:19:04,644 --> 00:19:06,687 Listening to this blues music reminds me 213 00:19:06,812 --> 00:19:09,774 of my own trials and tribulations as a young guy and, uh... 214 00:19:09,899 --> 00:19:14,153 You know, my folks, they really, really dump on me. They really do. 215 00:19:15,613 --> 00:19:17,573 So, you guys get along with your parents? 216 00:19:20,952 --> 00:19:24,246 I guess you guys moved out by now though, huh? 217 00:19:27,208 --> 00:19:29,752 - Uh, what's this, sir? - Drink it. 218 00:19:32,630 --> 00:19:34,465 Uh... 219 00:19:34,590 --> 00:19:38,094 That's a very sweet thought of both you gentlemen, but I really don't... 220 00:19:41,138 --> 00:19:42,556 Until now. 221 00:19:47,478 --> 00:19:49,397 See you guys in the emergency room, huh? 222 00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:52,900 Hello, pretty lady. Tell me something. 223 00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:56,737 What's a beautiful broad like you doing with a malaka like this, huh? 224 00:19:56,862 --> 00:20:00,032 It's purely sexual. 225 00:20:00,157 --> 00:20:01,617 No shit. 226 00:20:02,326 --> 00:20:04,161 She's into malakas, Dino. 227 00:20:08,165 --> 00:20:11,002 She's into malakas! Do you believe that? 228 00:20:17,258 --> 00:20:18,968 You can say that again! 229 00:20:36,444 --> 00:20:40,823 Fats, man... let me tell you my story, man. 230 00:20:41,490 --> 00:20:46,495 Last year, I was insane for this crazy little 8th-grade bitch. 231 00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:48,122 - Crazy insane? 232 00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:49,832 - Insane? - Crazy? 233 00:20:49,957 --> 00:20:52,209 I was nuts for the woman, man. 234 00:20:52,334 --> 00:20:55,421 Now you gotta believe me, I'm telling the truth here. 235 00:20:55,546 --> 00:20:59,842 I'm speaking to you. I mean, I was nuts for the girl. 236 00:20:59,967 --> 00:21:02,553 And what did it to me was these big titties she had. 237 00:21:02,678 --> 00:21:04,930 For a 13-year-old girl, man! 238 00:21:05,056 --> 00:21:07,892 She wouldn't have had to worry about no titties for the rest of her life, boy. 239 00:21:08,017 --> 00:21:10,728 You know, she was set and she was looking good. 240 00:21:10,853 --> 00:21:12,354 That's the truth, baby. 241 00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:14,607 I called her every night for, like, a month. 242 00:21:14,732 --> 00:21:16,650 I mean, I'm talking devotion, man. 243 00:21:16,776 --> 00:21:18,778 Every damn night? 244 00:21:18,903 --> 00:21:20,654 Every night, Mitch. I ain't playing with you. 245 00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:22,615 On the telephone? 246 00:21:24,283 --> 00:21:26,744 What's this boy talking about, on the telephone, man? 247 00:21:26,869 --> 00:21:28,829 Explain it to him. 248 00:21:28,954 --> 00:21:30,831 Goddamn. We know there's a telephone, boy! 249 00:21:30,956 --> 00:21:34,168 - What the hell he think I'm doing? - But he hung up on her. 250 00:21:34,293 --> 00:21:37,254 Oh, you didn't hang up on her? The chick with those big, big titties? 251 00:21:37,379 --> 00:21:41,133 I hung up on the bitch. Now here's the capper. 252 00:21:41,258 --> 00:21:43,636 - You know what the bitch did to me? - Lay it on me. 253 00:21:43,761 --> 00:21:46,180 Check this shit out. Listen to what she did to me. She... 254 00:21:46,305 --> 00:21:50,101 She kneed you in the nuts and called him faggot in front of everybody. 255 00:21:50,226 --> 00:21:52,311 - She did what? - Bitch kneed your nuts? 256 00:21:52,436 --> 00:21:53,646 Bitch kneed my nuts! 257 00:21:53,771 --> 00:21:56,065 Bitch. I'm not playing with you. I ain't teasing, man. 258 00:21:56,190 --> 00:21:59,026 - In the family jewels? - In the family jewels, man. 259 00:21:59,151 --> 00:22:01,946 - Worst pain there is. - Broke my heart in two. 260 00:22:02,071 --> 00:22:06,117 - She broke more than your heart. - You're right there, baby. 261 00:22:06,242 --> 00:22:08,119 You can forget that other one. 262 00:22:08,244 --> 00:22:10,496 You got this fine jewel sitting right over here by you. 263 00:22:10,621 --> 00:22:13,415 - Yeah. - Ain't that the truth, baby? 264 00:22:13,541 --> 00:22:16,919 - That's the plain truth... - Uh-oh, there he goes! 265 00:22:20,297 --> 00:22:23,634 - Party's over. - Party's over, said the girl. 266 00:22:23,759 --> 00:22:27,304 I'm gonna get out of here. I got money for you right here. $50 for you. 267 00:22:31,809 --> 00:22:35,062 - I got $500 that boy won't make it. - I bet he's gonna make it. 268 00:22:44,613 --> 00:22:47,658 You know, I really shouldn't be driving. 269 00:22:47,783 --> 00:22:51,495 Hey, listen, I appreciate it. You know, I really just don't feel like driving. 270 00:22:52,746 --> 00:22:55,791 OK, forget it. I'll drive. Give me the keys! 271 00:22:55,916 --> 00:22:57,918 Give me the keys! 272 00:22:58,043 --> 00:23:00,129 Is he going to be all right? 273 00:23:00,254 --> 00:23:03,132 I don't know. I warned him about that Blind Dog bourbon. 274 00:23:03,257 --> 00:23:06,385 Hey, he don't even have his license, Lisa. 275 00:23:06,510 --> 00:23:09,263 He's not lying. I don't even have a learner's permit. 276 00:23:09,388 --> 00:23:11,849 Hey, let's scout another party, man. 277 00:23:12,808 --> 00:23:15,227 What are you gonna tell Chet about me? 278 00:23:15,352 --> 00:23:16,937 Nothing. 279 00:23:17,062 --> 00:23:18,689 Nothing? 280 00:23:18,814 --> 00:23:20,900 That's not very realistic, Wyatt. 281 00:23:21,025 --> 00:23:24,862 Look, I don't know. I'm just trying to concentrate on the road. 282 00:23:24,987 --> 00:23:28,908 You better concentrate a little harder. You're about to run a red light. 283 00:23:29,617 --> 00:23:30,951 Oh, shit! 284 00:23:39,877 --> 00:23:42,171 I hate that boy! I always hated that shit! 285 00:23:42,296 --> 00:23:45,549 I never listen to him! I hate this car! I hate it! 286 00:23:45,674 --> 00:23:47,092 Are you OK? 287 00:23:48,969 --> 00:23:52,765 Well, my nuts are halfway up my ass, but other than that, I'm perfect! 288 00:23:53,641 --> 00:23:56,268 You better think of what you're going to do about Chet. 289 00:23:56,393 --> 00:23:58,687 He's one serious idiot. 290 00:23:58,812 --> 00:24:01,106 You're stewed, butt wad! 291 00:24:02,566 --> 00:24:03,943 Who, me? 292 00:24:04,068 --> 00:24:05,945 Know what time it is? 293 00:24:06,070 --> 00:24:08,322 Um... 2:00? 294 00:24:08,447 --> 00:24:10,658 Time to pay the fiddler. 295 00:24:17,122 --> 00:24:21,085 Um... I was kind of counting on you to be human about this. 296 00:24:27,424 --> 00:24:29,635 Here's the bottom line, Wyatt. 297 00:24:30,719 --> 00:24:33,180 I'm telling Mom and Dad everything. 298 00:24:34,181 --> 00:24:37,268 I'm even considering making up some shit. 299 00:24:39,019 --> 00:24:40,854 Alright, Chet, name your price. 300 00:24:42,731 --> 00:24:45,901 $175 and zero cents, cash. 301 00:24:46,026 --> 00:24:50,447 New bills, crisp and clean, in my wallet by 7:00 a.m. 302 00:24:51,782 --> 00:24:53,075 Thank you. 303 00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:56,287 Hey, what are big brothers for? 304 00:24:57,663 --> 00:24:59,498 See you upstairs. 305 00:25:00,708 --> 00:25:03,002 - I don't need you. - Shh! 306 00:25:09,383 --> 00:25:11,260 The boozehounds return. 307 00:25:12,303 --> 00:25:14,138 What a joke! 308 00:25:14,263 --> 00:25:15,889 Hi, girls. 309 00:25:27,192 --> 00:25:29,320 Feeling kind of queasy? 310 00:25:29,445 --> 00:25:35,534 How about... a nice greasy pork sandwich 311 00:25:35,659 --> 00:25:38,287 served in a dirty ashtray? 312 00:25:49,089 --> 00:25:51,342 He pukes, you die. 313 00:25:52,468 --> 00:25:54,595 He's not laughing at you, Chet. It's just... 314 00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:56,764 Yes, I am. 315 00:25:56,889 --> 00:26:00,100 Did you tell Chet about...? Did he tell you about the woman we made tonight? 316 00:26:00,225 --> 00:26:02,895 He's obviously had it. He doesn't know what he's talking about. 317 00:26:03,020 --> 00:26:06,565 - No shit? - No shit, Chet. No shit. 318 00:26:06,690 --> 00:26:10,194 You two donkey dicks couldn't get laid in a morgue. 319 00:26:10,319 --> 00:26:12,446 You're right. You are absolutely right. 320 00:26:12,571 --> 00:26:15,157 - You're absolutely right, Chet... - Get him outta here. 321 00:26:15,282 --> 00:26:17,493 - What? - Come on. 322 00:26:29,338 --> 00:26:32,341 Cold-blooded shit he is. He's an asshole. 323 00:26:32,466 --> 00:26:35,844 Look at his haircut. Anybody with a haircut like that you know is an asshole... 324 00:26:54,613 --> 00:26:56,407 Psst! Lisa. 325 00:26:59,118 --> 00:27:01,120 Where are you? 326 00:27:03,038 --> 00:27:05,040 I'm right behind you. 327 00:27:08,669 --> 00:27:10,087 Surprise! 328 00:27:18,220 --> 00:27:20,055 I'm not going to hurt you, you silly thing. 329 00:27:20,180 --> 00:27:22,933 I mean, your lips. They feel like rigor mortis has set in. 330 00:27:23,058 --> 00:27:26,270 Why don't you try and relax a little bit? I'm only kissing you. 331 00:27:28,021 --> 00:27:31,191 I wasn't expecting you to kiss me. I was just... 332 00:27:43,912 --> 00:27:45,747 That was better. 333 00:27:47,749 --> 00:27:49,960 Want to try it again? 334 00:27:50,085 --> 00:27:54,131 If you don't mind. I mean, yes, please, ma'am. 335 00:28:12,983 --> 00:28:17,321 - You sure you're only 15? - I'll be 16 in June. 336 00:28:19,239 --> 00:28:20,866 You made me. 337 00:28:21,533 --> 00:28:23,160 You control me. 338 00:28:28,582 --> 00:28:31,919 What's on your mind? What are you thinking about, huh? 339 00:28:32,044 --> 00:28:33,253 Um... 340 00:28:34,296 --> 00:28:36,256 Women's gymnastics. 341 00:28:37,758 --> 00:28:40,260 Well, I don't know. I'll do my best. 342 00:28:41,637 --> 00:28:42,971 Good. 343 00:29:19,675 --> 00:29:24,513 Wyatt, Wyatt, Wyatt, where are you? 344 00:29:24,638 --> 00:29:27,724 - I'm right here, Gary. - Wyatt, what happened? 345 00:29:27,849 --> 00:29:29,476 I don't know. 346 00:29:29,601 --> 00:29:31,562 I think it was a dream. 347 00:29:34,314 --> 00:29:35,482 What? 348 00:29:35,607 --> 00:29:37,651 Everything. Last night. Lisa. 349 00:29:37,776 --> 00:29:39,861 The whole thing, it had to be a dream. 350 00:29:39,987 --> 00:29:43,448 It can't be a dream, Wyatt. We were both in it. 351 00:29:43,574 --> 00:29:46,201 How can two people have the same dream? 352 00:29:47,119 --> 00:29:49,413 There's no other explanation. It had to be a dream. 353 00:29:49,538 --> 00:29:52,583 Wait, let's analyze this. Alright, in your dream... 354 00:29:53,875 --> 00:29:56,211 did I get up in the middle of the night and yak in your sink? 355 00:29:57,337 --> 00:30:00,674 Didn't throw up. No. Nothing. You didn't see anything. 356 00:30:00,799 --> 00:30:02,843 Maybe it was a dream, you know. 357 00:30:03,719 --> 00:30:07,389 A very weird, bizarre, vivid... 358 00:30:08,932 --> 00:30:13,061 ...erotic, wet, detailed dream. 359 00:30:14,688 --> 00:30:16,231 Maybe we have malaria. 360 00:30:16,815 --> 00:30:18,108 Shit. 361 00:30:25,866 --> 00:30:29,453 Gary! Wyatt! Breakfast! 362 00:30:33,749 --> 00:30:36,960 Look, I don't have the kind of bucks it would take to pay Chet off about this. 363 00:30:37,085 --> 00:30:38,754 Yo, Wyatt! Coffee! 364 00:30:38,879 --> 00:30:42,424 You can't live in fear of Chet for the rest of your life. 365 00:30:42,549 --> 00:30:44,509 Why not? Just please... 366 00:30:46,928 --> 00:30:51,391 I don't know, Wyatt. I mean, it's seriously affecting your sex life. 367 00:30:51,516 --> 00:30:55,395 Ten seconds into my gymnastics routine, you passed out. 368 00:30:55,520 --> 00:30:56,980 You slept. 369 00:30:58,023 --> 00:30:59,566 I did my toes. 370 00:30:59,691 --> 00:31:02,402 By the way, you're very cute. 371 00:31:02,527 --> 00:31:05,238 We'll try it again some other time, OK? 372 00:31:08,992 --> 00:31:12,162 - Good morning, turd brain. - Hi, Chet. 373 00:31:17,292 --> 00:31:21,338 - You spit in this? - Not that I'm aware of, no. 374 00:31:22,422 --> 00:31:24,549 Hey, that looks pretty good. 375 00:31:30,305 --> 00:31:32,933 Now make yourself one, dick weed. 376 00:31:39,773 --> 00:31:42,109 I like your panties. 377 00:31:42,234 --> 00:31:45,570 - It's a joke, Chet. You know, it's all... 378 00:31:45,696 --> 00:31:49,658 That's not a joke! That is a severe behavioral disorder. 379 00:31:49,783 --> 00:31:52,285 Those are women's underpants! 380 00:31:52,411 --> 00:31:55,122 The next thing you know, you'll be wearing a bra on your head. 381 00:31:56,415 --> 00:31:59,668 The old man's gonna have a stroke on this one for sure. 382 00:32:00,961 --> 00:32:03,004 Alright, Chet. How much? 383 00:32:03,130 --> 00:32:04,506 How much? 384 00:32:04,631 --> 00:32:08,051 Oh, this goes way beyond payment, pal. 385 00:32:08,176 --> 00:32:10,053 Come on, Chet. Please? 386 00:32:11,888 --> 00:32:13,306 Well... 387 00:32:15,934 --> 00:32:18,228 Your VCR should cover it. 388 00:32:18,353 --> 00:32:20,355 For openers. 389 00:32:20,480 --> 00:32:21,898 Thank you. 390 00:32:22,691 --> 00:32:25,694 For Christ's sakes, will you cover yourself? 391 00:32:45,672 --> 00:32:49,301 You guys looking for something for your mom? 392 00:32:51,344 --> 00:32:53,889 I really don't think so... Sue. 393 00:32:55,974 --> 00:32:59,186 You guys have, uh... girlfriends? 394 00:32:59,311 --> 00:33:02,230 You know, Sue, one does really not refer 395 00:33:02,355 --> 00:33:05,150 to a 23-year-old woman as a girlfriend. 396 00:33:05,776 --> 00:33:08,069 - A mistress, Gar. - Mistress. 397 00:33:08,195 --> 00:33:10,071 - Lover. - Sexpot. 398 00:33:10,197 --> 00:33:12,407 She's a sexpot is what she is. 399 00:33:12,532 --> 00:33:17,496 You guys are the ones that got beat up at the homecoming game, right? 400 00:33:17,621 --> 00:33:19,247 Hmm... 401 00:33:21,374 --> 00:33:26,463 Uh... Susan, do you think you could wrap up a bottle of this scent for me? 402 00:33:26,588 --> 00:33:29,299 - I like this. - Um... two. 403 00:33:29,424 --> 00:33:31,885 And why don't you set yourself up with one of them, too. 404 00:33:32,010 --> 00:33:35,263 Set yourself up. That's three scents, please. 405 00:33:35,388 --> 00:33:38,600 - If you were a 15-year-old boy... - Hmm... 406 00:33:39,392 --> 00:33:42,020 - ...would these turn you on? - Hmm...? 407 00:33:43,063 --> 00:33:45,649 I think so, too. I'll take them. 408 00:33:52,447 --> 00:33:55,659 Uh... do you have a bra to match that? 409 00:33:55,784 --> 00:33:58,745 Something in leather or rubber, or barb wire? 410 00:33:58,870 --> 00:34:00,831 Give me a break. 411 00:34:03,542 --> 00:34:05,293 Check it out. Check it out. 412 00:34:05,418 --> 00:34:06,711 What? 413 00:34:11,466 --> 00:34:12,759 Five bucks? 414 00:34:12,884 --> 00:34:14,302 Finsky. 415 00:34:16,972 --> 00:34:18,807 Max, what are you gonna do? 416 00:34:23,144 --> 00:34:25,647 - You know what, Gar? - Hmm? 417 00:34:25,772 --> 00:34:29,484 For the first time in my life, I don't feel like a total dick. 418 00:34:29,609 --> 00:34:31,111 Yeah, me either. 419 00:34:43,164 --> 00:34:45,792 Sorry, boys. Momentary loss of motor nerves. 420 00:34:45,917 --> 00:34:49,170 Getting tired of this? We're not. But I'll tell you, there is a cure. 421 00:34:49,296 --> 00:34:52,132 Rumor has it, there's a big white sale going on. 422 00:34:52,257 --> 00:34:54,426 - At Towel World! - Towel World! 423 00:34:55,468 --> 00:34:57,679 - We're not impressed. - No. 424 00:35:04,144 --> 00:35:06,438 Can I have some of that, please? 425 00:35:08,857 --> 00:35:10,859 You know I'm getting really bored of their shit. 426 00:35:10,984 --> 00:35:13,778 - Well, do you wanna dump them? - I don't know. 427 00:35:13,904 --> 00:35:17,490 We have been with them three months. We've been to the parties, met the people. 428 00:35:17,616 --> 00:35:20,243 We won't go to any more parties and we won't meet any more people. 429 00:35:20,368 --> 00:35:22,370 We'll go into a social coma. 430 00:35:23,413 --> 00:35:24,831 - Sorry. - Sorry. 431 00:35:24,956 --> 00:35:26,374 We're sorry. 432 00:35:26,499 --> 00:35:29,544 - Wanna give them another chance? 433 00:35:30,754 --> 00:35:32,505 - Will you forgive us? - Please. 434 00:35:32,631 --> 00:35:34,507 Oh, you guys. 435 00:35:35,216 --> 00:35:37,636 What are we gonna do with you? 436 00:36:11,169 --> 00:36:13,213 - Excuse me! - Get outta my way! 437 00:36:14,255 --> 00:36:16,007 We got her, we got her, we got her. 438 00:36:25,976 --> 00:36:27,394 Hey! 439 00:36:33,733 --> 00:36:34,943 Hey! 440 00:36:35,694 --> 00:36:36,903 Hi. 441 00:36:39,322 --> 00:36:41,491 - That's lan. - This is Max. 442 00:36:42,575 --> 00:36:44,619 We call him Mad Max. 443 00:36:46,162 --> 00:36:48,623 - We saw you on the escalator. - Yeah. 444 00:36:49,666 --> 00:36:52,127 Yeah, you were looking at us, right? 445 00:36:52,252 --> 00:36:53,753 Yeah. 446 00:36:59,968 --> 00:37:03,346 - So what are you doing? - Nothing. I'm waiting for my ride. 447 00:37:18,111 --> 00:37:21,239 Lis, come on, hon. We're running late. 448 00:37:21,364 --> 00:37:23,324 Honey, move. 449 00:37:23,992 --> 00:37:25,827 Speak to you later. 450 00:37:36,504 --> 00:37:40,383 She likes the rough stuff. What can I do, you know? 451 00:37:45,430 --> 00:37:48,850 By the way, there's a party tonight at Wyatt's house. 452 00:37:48,975 --> 00:37:53,146 You can find his name in the students' directory under Donnelly. 453 00:37:53,271 --> 00:37:54,856 Pass the word around. 454 00:37:59,319 --> 00:38:00,820 Party? 455 00:38:08,703 --> 00:38:10,163 Don't ask. 456 00:38:12,290 --> 00:38:14,459 Wyatt, you're gonna have a heart attack by the time you're 40 457 00:38:14,584 --> 00:38:16,920 if you don't learn to relax. 458 00:38:17,045 --> 00:38:19,297 Have you tried inversion boots? 459 00:38:20,173 --> 00:38:23,134 Lisa, you don't understand my parents. 460 00:38:24,469 --> 00:38:26,179 What's there to understand? 461 00:38:26,304 --> 00:38:29,724 They're oppressive, meddlesome, difficult, demanding and totally bizarre. 462 00:38:29,849 --> 00:38:31,643 I mean, they're normal parents. 463 00:38:31,768 --> 00:38:34,521 Now stop worrying and go and get dressed. 464 00:38:35,730 --> 00:38:37,982 Lisa, I created you. 465 00:38:38,108 --> 00:38:40,819 Why do you do insist on doing things I don't want? 466 00:38:40,944 --> 00:38:43,530 Honey buns, you want to party so badly, you could bottle it. 467 00:38:43,655 --> 00:38:45,949 I mean, you and Gary, you want friends, you want popularity, 468 00:38:46,074 --> 00:38:47,867 you want all that stuff, right? 469 00:38:47,992 --> 00:38:50,703 Well, I've thought about it, sure, but... 470 00:38:52,247 --> 00:38:54,332 So I'm giving it to you. 471 00:38:56,292 --> 00:38:57,877 Thank you, really, thank you. 472 00:38:58,002 --> 00:39:00,588 But I don't want it in my house. 473 00:39:00,713 --> 00:39:04,342 If you want to be a party animal, you have to learn to live in the jungle. 474 00:39:04,467 --> 00:39:06,970 Now stop worrying and go and get dressed. 475 00:39:07,095 --> 00:39:09,556 I'm going to go and pick up Gary. 476 00:39:09,681 --> 00:39:12,016 I can't wait to meet his parents. 477 00:39:20,066 --> 00:39:22,485 Do you go to Gary's school? 478 00:39:24,487 --> 00:39:27,448 Do I look like I'm in high school? 479 00:39:27,574 --> 00:39:28,825 No. 480 00:39:28,950 --> 00:39:33,288 Well, what it is, Dad, she's a foreign exchange student, you know, 481 00:39:33,413 --> 00:39:36,332 and they have, like, a different educational system around the world. 482 00:39:36,457 --> 00:39:38,084 You look very, er... 483 00:39:39,460 --> 00:39:40,879 ...mature. 484 00:39:41,004 --> 00:39:45,216 Doesn't she? That's funny you say that cos I was thinking the same thing. 485 00:39:45,341 --> 00:39:46,926 And what happened was that, uh... 486 00:39:47,051 --> 00:39:49,137 So what do you do for a living, Al? 487 00:39:49,679 --> 00:39:51,973 I'm an independent businessman. 488 00:39:52,098 --> 00:39:56,561 Al... Dad... My dad's a plumber. And he's into plumbing. 489 00:39:56,686 --> 00:39:59,147 And, well, I guess you plumb, right, Dad? 490 00:40:00,148 --> 00:40:01,774 Yeah. 491 00:40:01,900 --> 00:40:03,776 Yeah, well, I, uh... 492 00:40:03,902 --> 00:40:07,614 - I think it's time to go. You ready? - Where do you think you're going? 493 00:40:07,739 --> 00:40:09,741 - To a party. - To a movie. 494 00:40:10,742 --> 00:40:12,744 Movie party is what it is, folks. 495 00:40:12,869 --> 00:40:15,455 - We're going to a movie party. - Such a little liar. 496 00:40:15,580 --> 00:40:19,292 No, I've whipped up this nasty little soirée over at his friend Wyatt's house. 497 00:40:19,417 --> 00:40:23,379 - "Soir" what? - Soirée, honey. I think that means party. 498 00:40:24,505 --> 00:40:25,882 Party. 499 00:40:26,007 --> 00:40:28,009 You know, there's going to be sex, drugs, rock 'n' roll, 500 00:40:28,134 --> 00:40:30,011 chips, dips, chains, whips... 501 00:40:30,136 --> 00:40:32,722 You know, your basic high school orgy type of thing. 502 00:40:32,847 --> 00:40:36,476 I mean, I'm not talking candle wax on the nipples 503 00:40:36,601 --> 00:40:38,436 or witchcraft or anything like that. 504 00:40:38,561 --> 00:40:41,481 No, no, no, no, just a couple of hundred kids 505 00:40:41,606 --> 00:40:44,442 running around in their underwear acting like complete animals. 506 00:40:44,567 --> 00:40:47,737 - Alright, goddamn it! I've heard enough! 507 00:40:47,862 --> 00:40:49,906 - Gary, you get to your room! - Yes, sir! 508 00:40:50,031 --> 00:40:53,284 No, it's OK. Just sit here. I'll take care of this. 509 00:40:53,409 --> 00:40:57,664 Girlie, you get the hell outta here before I throw you out. 510 00:40:57,789 --> 00:41:00,041 Don't threaten me, Al! 511 00:41:00,166 --> 00:41:02,710 You're out of shape. I'll kick your arse. 512 00:41:02,835 --> 00:41:07,006 I'm going to make this real easy for you. 513 00:41:07,131 --> 00:41:10,593 I'm taking Gary to a party. 514 00:41:10,718 --> 00:41:12,512 Over my dead body. 515 00:41:12,637 --> 00:41:18,309 He's a good kid. He studies hard. You've got no complaints. 516 00:41:18,434 --> 00:41:20,937 If anybody should be bitching, it should be Gary. 517 00:41:21,729 --> 00:41:23,940 You ever compliment him on his grades? 518 00:41:24,065 --> 00:41:26,442 You ever compliment him on anything? 519 00:41:26,567 --> 00:41:29,779 Hey! Hey! Look, Ma, compliments embarrass me. 520 00:41:29,904 --> 00:41:31,656 - Dad, you know... - Shut up! 521 00:41:33,449 --> 00:41:35,910 Have you ever wondered how sad it is 522 00:41:36,035 --> 00:41:38,955 that your son's only sexual outlet 523 00:41:39,080 --> 00:41:42,333 is tossing off to magazines in the bathroom? 524 00:41:42,458 --> 00:41:44,252 Oh, Gary! 525 00:41:44,377 --> 00:41:48,089 Ma, I never tossed off to anything! 526 00:41:48,214 --> 00:41:51,759 - You told me you were combing your hair! - But I was! I was! Mom! 527 00:41:51,884 --> 00:41:54,846 - Gary, shut up! - The water's running all day long... 528 00:41:54,971 --> 00:41:57,640 - Shut up! - I've never tossed off! 529 00:41:57,765 --> 00:42:01,060 - I've never tossed off! - And you wouldn't tell your own mother! 530 00:42:01,185 --> 00:42:02,353 Shut up! 531 00:42:02,478 --> 00:42:04,689 Shut up! Shut up! 532 00:42:07,233 --> 00:42:10,236 This guy deserves a party. 533 00:42:10,820 --> 00:42:13,531 Look, I don't know who you are, 534 00:42:13,656 --> 00:42:16,951 what you are, or where you came from, 535 00:42:17,702 --> 00:42:20,038 but I'm not taking any more of this. 536 00:42:20,997 --> 00:42:24,792 Dial the police, Lucy. Dial the damn police and give me the phone. 537 00:42:24,917 --> 00:42:29,005 The phone... I'm going to get the... 538 00:42:29,130 --> 00:42:32,383 - Give me the phone. - I'm trying to... Well, here it is. 539 00:42:38,973 --> 00:42:42,769 Jesus, God. Oh, Christ. 540 00:42:42,894 --> 00:42:45,313 Oh, Lord God. 541 00:42:48,358 --> 00:42:50,902 Oh... Uh-oh... 542 00:42:51,861 --> 00:42:53,488 Go ahead... 543 00:42:54,322 --> 00:42:55,990 Make your day? 544 00:43:01,829 --> 00:43:04,374 I'm really sorry it has to come to this. 545 00:43:04,499 --> 00:43:06,000 Come to what? 546 00:43:07,251 --> 00:43:10,380 If you don't cheer up, I'll blow your face off. 547 00:43:22,809 --> 00:43:25,478 Oh, come on, don't be such an old lady. Everything's cool. 548 00:43:25,603 --> 00:43:27,647 Everything's cool! Everything's cool. 549 00:43:27,772 --> 00:43:29,732 Yeah, yeah. My dad's going to castrate me. 550 00:43:29,857 --> 00:43:31,859 And my mother almost had, like, a cardiac arrest. 551 00:43:31,984 --> 00:43:35,029 My parents'll never let me in the house, and if they do, I'll be grounded till I'm 45. 552 00:43:35,154 --> 00:43:37,156 Other than that, everything's great. Everything's just really cool. 553 00:43:37,281 --> 00:43:39,700 I mean, you know, it couldn't be better. 554 00:43:40,827 --> 00:43:42,995 Listen, trust me for once, will you? 555 00:43:45,248 --> 00:43:47,750 They don't know what happened. 556 00:43:51,003 --> 00:43:54,841 Did you think Gary was acting a little strangely this evening? 557 00:43:56,884 --> 00:43:58,177 Gary? 558 00:43:59,637 --> 00:44:01,097 Who's Gary? 559 00:44:05,852 --> 00:44:08,813 Lisa, you have to promise me 560 00:44:08,938 --> 00:44:11,274 that things aren't gonna get out of control. 561 00:44:11,399 --> 00:44:15,153 Wyatt, don't worry. You're just having a few friends over. 562 00:44:15,278 --> 00:44:17,488 I don't have any friends, Lisa. 563 00:44:17,613 --> 00:44:19,240 He doesn't. 564 00:44:20,616 --> 00:44:22,410 Boy ain't lying. 565 00:44:24,328 --> 00:44:25,997 You do now. 566 00:44:34,380 --> 00:44:35,465 Hi. 567 00:44:35,590 --> 00:44:38,009 Hi! 568 00:44:38,134 --> 00:44:39,218 Party! 569 00:44:39,343 --> 00:44:42,805 Party! Party! Party! Party! 570 00:44:42,930 --> 00:44:44,599 Party! Party! Party! Party! 571 00:45:10,166 --> 00:45:11,501 Yo! 572 00:45:11,626 --> 00:45:14,420 Who's here? How you doing? How you doing? 573 00:45:15,588 --> 00:45:17,381 - Where's the bar? - Bar! 574 00:45:20,718 --> 00:45:23,513 Do you think they'll embarrass us tonight? 575 00:45:23,638 --> 00:45:25,056 Yeah. 576 00:45:25,181 --> 00:45:26,807 - Yeah? - Yeah. 577 00:45:32,146 --> 00:45:33,439 Caviar? 578 00:45:34,398 --> 00:45:37,235 If Max and lan see her, it is all over for us. 579 00:45:39,111 --> 00:45:42,198 - How's your stomach? - It's a little better. 580 00:45:42,323 --> 00:45:45,701 If you're gonna float an air biscuit, let me know, OK? 581 00:45:45,826 --> 00:45:47,411 Float a what? 582 00:45:47,537 --> 00:45:49,413 If you're gonna fart, if you're gonna squeeze cheese, 583 00:45:49,539 --> 00:45:51,123 let me know, OK? I'll hit the fan. 584 00:45:51,249 --> 00:45:54,252 I'm sorry, Gary, it's just I suffer pain and discomfort 585 00:45:54,377 --> 00:45:57,213 due to occasional stomach upset. 586 00:45:57,338 --> 00:46:00,258 You know, I can't believe this, Wyatt. I'm so disappointed in us. 587 00:46:00,383 --> 00:46:02,468 All we ever do is sit around and talk about how great it would be 588 00:46:02,593 --> 00:46:04,053 if we went to parties, right? 589 00:46:04,178 --> 00:46:06,597 And now it's our party, and there are hundreds of people here having a great time, 590 00:46:06,722 --> 00:46:08,558 and we're in the john. we're in the john! 591 00:46:08,683 --> 00:46:12,436 - I can't believe it. - Gary, you're just as uptight as I am. 592 00:46:12,562 --> 00:46:15,064 Let me tell you something. Nobody can be as uptight as you, OK? 593 00:46:15,189 --> 00:46:17,233 Nobody. Your middle name is tense, OK? 594 00:46:17,358 --> 00:46:18,943 Wyatt "Tense Up" Donnelly. 595 00:46:19,068 --> 00:46:21,737 - Alright, this is true. This is true. - It's true. 596 00:46:21,862 --> 00:46:26,701 But... it's not that bad. I mean, we can hear the music. 597 00:46:27,535 --> 00:46:29,036 We can dance, so that's great. 598 00:46:29,161 --> 00:46:31,414 If we put our noses to the door, maybe we can smell the food. 599 00:46:31,539 --> 00:46:33,040 Hey, brother! 600 00:46:33,165 --> 00:46:35,543 What's happening, my main man? 601 00:46:35,668 --> 00:46:36,961 Right on! 602 00:46:37,628 --> 00:46:39,797 - Scotch. - Straight up? 603 00:46:39,922 --> 00:46:41,632 Ah, give me the whole bottle. 604 00:46:41,757 --> 00:46:46,596 Tell you what... you bend over and I'll shove it straight up your ass. 605 00:46:47,805 --> 00:46:50,600 - On the rocks is fine. 606 00:46:52,059 --> 00:46:55,062 Yeah, that's what I thought you were gonna say, you jive turkey. 607 00:47:08,492 --> 00:47:09,619 There she is. 608 00:47:09,744 --> 00:47:11,662 You deal with the drinks. I'll kill the girls. 609 00:47:43,944 --> 00:47:45,863 - Hi. - Hil 610 00:47:49,492 --> 00:47:51,744 - Did we see you at the mall today? - Yes. 611 00:47:51,869 --> 00:47:53,371 Oh, yeah! 612 00:47:56,165 --> 00:47:58,626 It's alright... Um... 613 00:47:58,751 --> 00:48:01,128 - What are you doing here? - I'm living here now. 614 00:48:01,253 --> 00:48:03,172 I'm Wyatt and Gary's girlfriend. 615 00:48:03,297 --> 00:48:05,925 - No! 616 00:48:06,759 --> 00:48:10,930 Ah! OK... We're Wyatt's friends. 617 00:48:11,055 --> 00:48:13,891 Er... can we come to the party or should we just bail? 618 00:48:14,016 --> 00:48:15,601 Bail! 619 00:48:18,479 --> 00:48:20,898 - No, no, come in, come on. - Really? 620 00:48:21,023 --> 00:48:22,441 Oh, thank you. 621 00:48:23,401 --> 00:48:25,695 Gary and Wyatt are around here someplace. 622 00:48:25,820 --> 00:48:28,280 I wonder if Lisa's having a good time. 623 00:48:28,406 --> 00:48:31,951 Lisa could have a good time at an insurance seminar, Wyatt. 624 00:48:32,076 --> 00:48:35,079 You know, the thing that really galls me 625 00:48:36,288 --> 00:48:39,709 is that she's ours and we can't get close to her. 626 00:48:42,294 --> 00:48:43,796 Hit the fan. 627 00:48:47,425 --> 00:48:49,385 This is, like, the best party I've ever been to. 628 00:48:49,510 --> 00:48:51,804 I know. It's great! 629 00:48:51,929 --> 00:48:54,473 Do you know whose house this is? 630 00:48:54,598 --> 00:48:58,894 I don't know. I think it might be that girl with the English accent. 631 00:48:59,019 --> 00:49:02,773 Did you notice that girl doesn't have a zit on her whole body? Did you notice that? 632 00:49:02,898 --> 00:49:06,068 - I know. She has, like, zero fat. - And she's so relaxed. 633 00:49:06,193 --> 00:49:08,279 - She burped and it was, like, charming. - Charming. 634 00:49:08,404 --> 00:49:09,488 Yeah! 635 00:49:11,282 --> 00:49:12,491 Shit. 636 00:49:13,826 --> 00:49:15,661 - Ah, yeah. - The bathroom. 637 00:49:23,753 --> 00:49:25,004 - Ladies. - Hi. 638 00:49:25,129 --> 00:49:26,547 Hi. 639 00:49:28,048 --> 00:49:29,800 I can't believe you! I cannot... 640 00:49:29,925 --> 00:49:32,511 You're dropping wolf bait and there are chicks outside! 641 00:49:32,636 --> 00:49:35,973 Light a match or something! Light a fire, I don't know. 642 00:49:38,184 --> 00:49:39,935 Hi. 643 00:49:40,060 --> 00:49:41,479 Hi. 644 00:49:41,604 --> 00:49:44,148 We're sorry. We thought there were just girls in there. 645 00:49:44,273 --> 00:49:47,234 - I'm sorry. - It's just us dudes, you know. 646 00:49:47,359 --> 00:49:49,028 What are you doing here? 647 00:49:49,695 --> 00:49:52,281 Gary was just taking a shit! 648 00:49:52,406 --> 00:49:54,074 No, what I meant was... 649 00:49:56,368 --> 00:49:59,413 No, no, what I meant was, what are you doing at the party? 650 00:49:59,538 --> 00:50:02,833 - Oh, it's my house. - This is your party? 651 00:50:02,958 --> 00:50:05,878 Yeah, well, you know, we like to do this about once a week, 652 00:50:06,003 --> 00:50:08,297 throw little gatherings here, little get-togethers, that kind of thing. 653 00:50:08,422 --> 00:50:10,382 - Haven't you guys been by? - No. 654 00:50:10,508 --> 00:50:12,593 No? How the heck did we miss these two, Wyatt? 655 00:50:12,718 --> 00:50:15,304 I don't know. So many people, so many parties. 656 00:50:15,429 --> 00:50:19,016 So many people, you know, and so many parties, you lose track... 657 00:50:19,141 --> 00:50:22,770 Um... would you mind if I came in and checked my face? 658 00:50:22,895 --> 00:50:25,022 What's wrong with your face? 659 00:50:27,066 --> 00:50:28,400 Can we come in? 660 00:50:28,526 --> 00:50:31,237 - Come on in. - Sure, yeah. OK. Be our guests. 661 00:50:31,362 --> 00:50:34,365 - Thanks, guys. - Come onin. 662 00:50:36,492 --> 00:50:38,452 Well, um... 663 00:50:38,577 --> 00:50:40,579 We've seen you guys at school, but we've never met. 664 00:50:40,704 --> 00:50:42,081 - You're Hilly. - You're Deb. 665 00:50:42,206 --> 00:50:43,707 - How you doing? - Deb. 666 00:50:43,833 --> 00:50:45,835 - Hi. I'm Gary. - I'm Wyatt. 667 00:50:45,960 --> 00:50:47,795 Well, what have you guys been doing? 668 00:50:49,588 --> 00:50:53,300 This is a wild crowd. I didn't know you guys had so many friends. 669 00:50:53,425 --> 00:50:55,386 - Yeah, neither did we. - Neither did we. 670 00:50:56,554 --> 00:51:00,724 Uh, who's the girl with the accent? I thought that this was her party, but... 671 00:51:00,850 --> 00:51:04,728 You mean the real sensuous, exotic, sexy, mature, sex symbol type? 672 00:51:04,854 --> 00:51:06,480 - Yeah. - Yeah. 673 00:51:06,605 --> 00:51:08,941 She's with us. 674 00:51:09,066 --> 00:51:11,402 She's with you guys? 675 00:51:12,027 --> 00:51:14,071 Come on, Lisa. Why not? 676 00:51:15,990 --> 00:51:19,159 Because I belong to Gary and Wyatt. 677 00:51:19,285 --> 00:51:23,372 Belong? What? They make you in the garage with power tools? 678 00:51:23,497 --> 00:51:25,583 They own you? Control you? 679 00:51:25,708 --> 00:51:28,502 - Seriously? - Seriously. 680 00:51:28,627 --> 00:51:30,004 They're toads. 681 00:51:30,129 --> 00:51:32,715 Do I look like I'd go out with two toads? 682 00:51:34,008 --> 00:51:37,011 You do. It's true. 683 00:51:37,136 --> 00:51:41,307 I think Gary and Wyatt are gonna force everyone to redefine their terms. 684 00:51:43,183 --> 00:51:46,061 And you're completely loyal to them? 685 00:51:46,186 --> 00:51:49,315 I do whatever they say. 686 00:52:00,701 --> 00:52:01,869 Hi. 687 00:52:04,663 --> 00:52:08,292 Could you excuse us for a minute, please? 688 00:52:08,417 --> 00:52:11,378 Ah, that's no problem. Yeah, we'll be in here. 689 00:52:11,503 --> 00:52:12,922 Yeah. 690 00:52:20,846 --> 00:52:22,473 OK, fine. 691 00:52:26,101 --> 00:52:28,228 I could be wrong, but I think these ladies are stoked for us, Wyatt. 692 00:52:28,354 --> 00:52:30,105 - I got that feeling myself. - What do we do? 693 00:52:30,230 --> 00:52:31,607 - I don't know. - Should we go for it? 694 00:52:31,732 --> 00:52:33,442 - What about Lisa? - She did say we should party. 695 00:52:33,567 --> 00:52:35,694 Let's get it on with these two, score points and go back to Lisa. 696 00:52:35,819 --> 00:52:37,154 This is like a dream come true. 697 00:52:37,279 --> 00:52:40,074 How about if we see if we can score with these two in case we can't later? 698 00:52:40,199 --> 00:52:42,242 - Sounds good. - But we gotta give Lisa a shot. 699 00:52:42,368 --> 00:52:45,704 I don't wanna hurt her feelings. The girls want a long, lean bone job from me. 700 00:52:45,829 --> 00:52:47,247 - Ready to party down? - 10-4. 701 00:52:47,373 --> 00:52:48,624 - Let's break. - Break. 702 00:53:00,886 --> 00:53:02,888 Those guys are weird, but they're kind of cute. 703 00:53:03,013 --> 00:53:04,515 - Hi. - Hil 704 00:53:04,640 --> 00:53:08,060 And where did you two disappear to? 705 00:53:08,185 --> 00:53:11,438 - Nowhere. We were in the kitchen. - We were in the bathroom. 706 00:53:12,356 --> 00:53:14,233 - Eating. - Doing our hair. 707 00:53:14,358 --> 00:53:16,360 Have you met Gary and Wyatt? 708 00:53:16,944 --> 00:53:18,988 - Yeah. - No. 709 00:53:19,113 --> 00:53:20,406 Sort of. 710 00:53:22,491 --> 00:53:26,120 If you get the chance... shower with them. 711 00:53:26,245 --> 00:53:29,289 I did. It's a mind scrambler! 712 00:53:30,124 --> 00:53:32,126 Oh! Hurts so good. 713 00:53:37,798 --> 00:53:40,050 She took a shower with them. 714 00:53:40,175 --> 00:53:43,012 - I have a wonderful idea, Henry. - Hmm? 715 00:53:43,137 --> 00:53:47,266 After dinner, why don't we stop by and visit with Wyatt? 716 00:53:47,391 --> 00:53:51,228 I hate to think of his being alone at home tonight. 717 00:53:51,353 --> 00:53:55,065 - Doesn't he have anything to read? - Well, I don't know, dear. 718 00:53:55,190 --> 00:53:58,569 But you know nothing's more important to a teenage boy 719 00:53:58,694 --> 00:54:00,904 than his grandparents. 720 00:54:01,030 --> 00:54:02,948 - We'll drop by. - Oh, good. 721 00:54:16,837 --> 00:54:21,341 I'd like to open up by apologizing for the Icee today at the mall. 722 00:54:21,467 --> 00:54:24,178 It was very immature, and I'm sorry. 723 00:54:24,303 --> 00:54:28,140 - And, uh... - It was just, like, tomfoolery. 724 00:54:28,265 --> 00:54:30,100 But we are sorry. 725 00:54:30,225 --> 00:54:32,644 - It happened. - Yeah. 726 00:54:33,312 --> 00:54:36,648 So what's the deal with Lisa? You know, can we borrow her? 727 00:54:37,274 --> 00:54:39,651 Uh... we can't do that, guys, 728 00:54:39,777 --> 00:54:42,029 because common decency prohibits us, we can't. 729 00:54:42,154 --> 00:54:43,572 It's not cool. 730 00:54:43,697 --> 00:54:45,991 - Well, she said it was cool. - Yeah. 731 00:54:46,116 --> 00:54:49,953 We can't take advantage of her loyalty. Sorry, guys. 732 00:54:50,079 --> 00:54:52,998 Man, but that's really selfish. That hurts, you know. 733 00:54:53,123 --> 00:54:54,374 lan, uh... 734 00:54:55,000 --> 00:54:57,002 Just forget it, guys, cos we can't do it, you know? 735 00:54:57,127 --> 00:55:00,047 Ah, come on. Quit being such pricks. 736 00:55:00,172 --> 00:55:01,298 Hey, come on. 737 00:55:01,423 --> 00:55:03,425 Regardless of what she may have told you, 738 00:55:03,550 --> 00:55:05,761 our feelings for Lisa run very deep. 739 00:55:05,886 --> 00:55:08,347 It's, like, emotions. Heavy, heavy emotions. 740 00:55:08,472 --> 00:55:11,350 Our feelings for Deb and Hilly run as deep as yours do for Lisa. 741 00:55:11,475 --> 00:55:12,893 And it's respect. 742 00:55:13,018 --> 00:55:15,270 It's like the time we spent together, you know. 743 00:55:15,395 --> 00:55:18,357 And a couple of guys like you deserve them. 744 00:55:18,482 --> 00:55:21,026 See, we like your style. So we wanna make a deal with you. 745 00:55:21,151 --> 00:55:23,278 You let us have a crack at Lisa, 746 00:55:23,403 --> 00:55:26,156 and then we'll let you have Deb and Hilly. 747 00:55:28,242 --> 00:55:30,119 Can you guys keep a secret? 748 00:55:30,244 --> 00:55:32,663 - Sure. - Secret? 749 00:55:32,788 --> 00:55:35,707 - Look again. It's Gary. - No, no. 750 00:55:35,833 --> 00:55:38,001 It's our boy, Gary. 751 00:55:38,127 --> 00:55:40,963 He's our 16-year-old boy. 752 00:55:41,088 --> 00:55:43,841 I don't know what the hell you're talking about, Lucy. 753 00:55:43,966 --> 00:55:46,385 And I want you to shut up. 754 00:55:47,427 --> 00:55:50,722 I feel like an asshole. This had better work. 755 00:55:50,848 --> 00:55:53,433 This is just the blueprint. OK, now look. You like it? 756 00:55:53,559 --> 00:55:55,269 Bigger tits. 757 00:55:55,394 --> 00:55:56,728 Go, go, go, go! 758 00:55:56,854 --> 00:55:58,647 Give him the knee-shooters. I don't care. 759 00:56:01,191 --> 00:56:05,195 'We have code penetration again. What the hell's going on in here?" 760 00:56:10,868 --> 00:56:12,703 Excuse me, Arthur. 761 00:56:12,828 --> 00:56:14,997 - It's Art. - Excuse me, Art. 762 00:56:29,636 --> 00:56:31,096 Oh, shit. 763 00:56:46,570 --> 00:56:48,405 - "Where's Eddie?' - 'Eddie's down in the lab. 764 00:56:48,530 --> 00:56:50,574 'He and Grandpa are working on a new project.' 765 00:56:50,699 --> 00:56:53,285 - 'Another invention?' 766 00:56:53,410 --> 00:56:55,704 'It's got something to do with a robot." 767 00:57:09,384 --> 00:57:12,638 Wyatt, what's going on? Turn this thing off! 768 00:57:12,763 --> 00:57:14,890 You're gonna love it! How you doing? 769 00:57:15,015 --> 00:57:17,643 I'm shitting in my pants! 770 00:58:36,972 --> 00:58:38,390 It worked. 771 00:58:56,491 --> 00:59:00,579 You had to be big shots, didn't you? You had to show off. 772 00:59:01,747 --> 00:59:04,416 When are you going to learn people will like you for what you are, 773 00:59:04,541 --> 00:59:06,543 not for what you can give them? 774 00:59:08,712 --> 00:59:11,214 In your race for power and glory, 775 00:59:11,340 --> 00:59:14,134 you forgot one small detail. 776 00:59:15,635 --> 00:59:17,471 We forgot to hook up the doll. 777 00:59:17,596 --> 00:59:20,182 You forgot to hook up the doll. 778 01:00:02,766 --> 01:00:04,726 Something's going on here, Carmen. 779 01:00:04,851 --> 01:00:08,188 I have a feeling we're not going to approve, Henry. 780 01:00:09,815 --> 01:00:12,442 A missile! A missile! 781 01:00:13,402 --> 01:00:15,737 A missile in my house, Gary! 782 01:00:17,948 --> 01:00:22,077 - Yeah, this puppy's for real, alright. - It was an accident. Simple, you know... 783 01:00:22,202 --> 01:00:24,496 Accident, my ass, Gary! 784 01:00:24,621 --> 01:00:26,873 My parents are coming home. Chet's coming home. 785 01:00:26,998 --> 01:00:30,669 - They're gonna freak out! - They're gonna shit eggrolls. 786 01:00:30,794 --> 01:00:33,380 Get out! Get out! Scat! 787 01:00:33,505 --> 01:00:36,133 Out of here, you disgusting tramps! 788 01:00:36,258 --> 01:00:38,218 You, you, you hosers! 789 01:00:38,343 --> 01:00:40,345 Out! Out! Out! 790 01:00:40,470 --> 01:00:42,556 My God, cut that out, would you? 791 01:00:42,681 --> 01:00:44,850 You ought to know better than to walk into somebody's house 792 01:00:44,975 --> 01:00:47,185 and start hitting people with your Rex Harrison hat! 793 01:00:47,310 --> 01:00:50,814 This is my daughter's home. Who the hell are you? 794 01:00:50,939 --> 01:00:54,776 Well, I'm a very dear, close personal friend of your grandson's. 795 01:00:54,901 --> 01:00:56,945 Henry, call the police. 796 01:00:57,070 --> 01:00:59,739 I will. I'll have you incarcerated. 797 01:00:59,865 --> 01:01:02,284 Here's the deal, folks. 798 01:01:02,409 --> 01:01:06,163 Gary and Wyatt, they created me on their computer. 799 01:01:06,288 --> 01:01:09,666 I'm not going to stand here and listen to this baloney. 800 01:01:09,791 --> 01:01:13,003 He won't, you know. He doesn't stand for baloney. 801 01:01:13,545 --> 01:01:16,673 Would you mind waiting here? I won't be a moment. 802 01:01:19,092 --> 01:01:21,094 Have you ever? 803 01:01:21,928 --> 01:01:23,221 Never. 804 01:01:24,222 --> 01:01:27,559 Excuse me, guys. Wyatt, your grandparents are downstairs. 805 01:01:27,684 --> 01:01:29,269 OK. Thanks, Lis. 806 01:01:33,523 --> 01:01:35,442 - Lisa! - Yes? 807 01:01:35,567 --> 01:01:37,611 Where are my grandparents? 808 01:01:38,195 --> 01:01:41,281 - Wyatt, your kitchen is blue. - You want to try one? 809 01:01:41,406 --> 01:01:43,283 Where are my grandparents, Lisa? 810 01:01:43,408 --> 01:01:45,619 They're all taken care of, OK? 811 01:01:52,667 --> 01:01:54,920 You're going to love this one. 812 01:02:00,717 --> 01:02:03,136 - Are they all right? - They're fine. 813 01:02:03,261 --> 01:02:07,974 In fact, they're better than fine. They're not aging anymore. 814 01:02:08,683 --> 01:02:10,477 See? They're smiling. 815 01:02:12,187 --> 01:02:14,731 Uh... Lisa, if any more of his relatives drop by, 816 01:02:14,856 --> 01:02:17,567 we'll be upstairs in the bathroom, OK? 817 01:02:17,692 --> 01:02:19,694 That's pretty sick, Lis. 818 01:02:20,153 --> 01:02:23,532 Those guys really need some self-confidence. 819 01:02:24,658 --> 01:02:29,996 A challenge. Something that'll bring out their inner strength and courage. 820 01:02:34,876 --> 01:02:36,920 I'm so bloody clever. 821 01:02:40,340 --> 01:02:41,633 Now! 822 01:03:30,140 --> 01:03:32,183 This Bud's for you. 823 01:03:39,899 --> 01:03:42,444 - This party's lame, Max. - What about the girls? 824 01:03:44,112 --> 01:03:46,114 Girls, shmirls! 825 01:04:06,968 --> 01:04:10,430 Lisa! What's going on? 826 01:04:11,598 --> 01:04:13,058 Aargh! 827 01:04:30,659 --> 01:04:33,036 Gary! Gary, Gary... 828 01:04:33,161 --> 01:04:34,954 Gary, listen to me. 829 01:04:35,080 --> 01:04:37,957 There are motorcycles in my house! 830 01:04:39,376 --> 01:04:42,087 Wyatt, there are killer mutants in your house, OK? 831 01:05:02,232 --> 01:05:04,526 Screw the house. 832 01:05:44,274 --> 01:05:45,650 Guys, you have uninvited guests. 833 01:05:45,775 --> 01:05:47,736 I think you better come out and ask them to leave. 834 01:05:47,861 --> 01:05:49,404 They're getting pretty rowdy. 835 01:05:54,993 --> 01:05:58,663 This is an excellent chance for you to prove your bravery and courage. 836 01:05:58,788 --> 01:06:01,791 Those are outdated concepts, alright? Excuse us. 837 01:06:03,168 --> 01:06:05,462 Don't let John Wayne hear you say that. 838 01:06:05,587 --> 01:06:07,672 The man is dead, Lisa, OK? 839 01:06:09,632 --> 01:06:12,385 Well, so are you, if you don't deal with this situation. 840 01:06:14,929 --> 01:06:16,556 No, thanks. 841 01:06:19,142 --> 01:06:21,269 Gary, do you feel like a chicken? 842 01:06:21,936 --> 01:06:25,148 Wyatt, if I could shoot an egg out my ass right now, I would. 843 01:06:27,442 --> 01:06:31,863 What about all these people? Will they think we're cowards? 844 01:06:33,406 --> 01:06:34,574 I don't know. 845 01:06:34,699 --> 01:06:37,494 Look, we can deal with shame, OK? Death is a much deeper issue. 846 01:07:03,269 --> 01:07:05,980 Uh... we're going to get you guys some drinks. 847 01:07:06,105 --> 01:07:07,941 You look like a Scotch man. You want some... 848 01:07:08,066 --> 01:07:10,109 - We're gonna get some stuff... - Ah! 849 01:07:11,361 --> 01:07:14,405 Is this your party? 850 01:07:15,782 --> 01:07:16,991 Uh... 851 01:07:18,034 --> 01:07:22,205 - Well, yeah kind of. - I don't know if you can call it a party. 852 01:07:22,330 --> 01:07:24,040 It's just a few friends. 853 01:07:24,165 --> 01:07:25,416 How come... 854 01:07:27,001 --> 01:07:31,130 ...two unpopular dicks like you 855 01:07:31,256 --> 01:07:33,049 is having a party? 856 01:07:33,716 --> 01:07:37,053 I don't know. I mean, I guess I was just asking myself that very question. 857 01:07:37,178 --> 01:07:39,848 - And I'm like dicks, sometimes... - Look, we're very sorry. 858 01:07:40,473 --> 01:07:44,435 How would you like all your friends here to know... 859 01:07:45,812 --> 01:07:49,607 ...that you wear a bra on your head? 860 01:07:57,657 --> 01:08:00,827 Tossed off into any good books lately, have we? 861 01:08:05,748 --> 01:08:09,252 You two can't even take a shower 862 01:08:10,336 --> 01:08:13,214 with a beautiful woman 863 01:08:13,339 --> 01:08:16,092 without wearing your jeans! 864 01:08:25,018 --> 01:08:26,686 You! 865 01:08:26,811 --> 01:08:28,396 Come here! 866 01:08:30,648 --> 01:08:32,108 Now! 867 01:08:51,294 --> 01:08:54,422 - Prepare to die, Wyatt. - Gary, I can't wait to die. 868 01:08:54,547 --> 01:08:56,966 - We are gonna kick... - Ass. 869 01:08:57,091 --> 01:08:59,886 OK. This is war. 870 01:09:00,011 --> 01:09:03,348 Hands off the girls. Let's leave the girls out of this. Hands off. 871 01:09:05,642 --> 01:09:08,227 I said hands off! Now! 872 01:09:19,113 --> 01:09:21,032 Why don't you shut up, bitch? 873 01:09:27,246 --> 01:09:30,166 And as for your ugly ass, let me tell you something. 874 01:09:30,291 --> 01:09:33,836 You don't come into my friend's house with your faggot friends, 875 01:09:33,962 --> 01:09:36,089 driving your motorbikes all over his floors, 876 01:09:36,214 --> 01:09:38,800 breaking windows, making a mess, stinking up the place. 877 01:09:38,925 --> 01:09:40,426 And believe me, you do stink. 878 01:09:45,056 --> 01:09:47,433 And here's what's gonna happen. 879 01:09:47,558 --> 01:09:49,227 You're gonna let go of the girls, 880 01:09:49,352 --> 01:09:52,730 and you're going to apologize to all these people. 881 01:09:52,855 --> 01:09:57,068 And you're gonna get on your bikes and pedal your ugly asses out of here. 882 01:10:00,363 --> 01:10:03,825 So now, we're gentlemen, SO we're gonna give you a choice. 883 01:10:04,409 --> 01:10:06,536 Yeah, you can leave in peace... 884 01:10:10,915 --> 01:10:13,459 Or you can stay and die. 885 01:10:25,096 --> 01:10:26,806 Choice is yours. 886 01:11:06,054 --> 01:11:07,472 Get out of here. 887 01:11:12,810 --> 01:11:15,563 Beg your pardon. You have a lovely home. 888 01:11:16,606 --> 01:11:20,359 Terribly sorry. Call me. We'll have lunch. 889 01:11:20,485 --> 01:11:22,695 Can we keep this between us? 890 01:11:24,489 --> 01:11:26,908 I'd hate to lose my teaching job. 891 01:11:31,746 --> 01:11:33,164 God bless you. 892 01:11:44,383 --> 01:11:47,970 I can't believe... You know... Is everyone alright? I just want to know. 893 01:11:48,096 --> 01:11:50,181 This is so exciting. You know, we're heroes. 894 01:11:50,306 --> 01:11:52,642 These guys came into your house and we showed them down. 895 01:11:52,767 --> 01:11:56,270 I can't believe this. Know what we did? You and me saved all these people, Wyatt. 896 01:11:56,395 --> 01:11:58,147 You don't understand that. We're heroes. 897 01:11:58,272 --> 01:12:01,067 This could mean a guest shot on Phil Donahue. But this is exciting, man! 898 01:12:01,192 --> 01:12:02,401 - Gary! - What? 899 01:12:02,527 --> 01:12:05,905 - Where the hell did you get that thing? - Squirt gun, man. That's it. 900 01:12:16,833 --> 01:12:18,668 That's my boys. 901 01:12:29,929 --> 01:12:31,931 What a weird night, huh? 902 01:12:34,392 --> 01:12:36,936 You really weren't afraid of those guys? 903 01:12:40,022 --> 01:12:44,026 I was scared. But what could I do? 904 01:12:51,951 --> 01:12:56,289 It's probably a good idea for me not to ask too many questions about tonight. 905 01:12:56,414 --> 01:12:57,874 Probably. 906 01:12:57,999 --> 01:13:00,501 This is a sort of a night of weird shit. 907 01:13:00,626 --> 01:13:04,589 I was wondering if I can ask you something kind of strange? 908 01:13:10,344 --> 01:13:12,180 Would you kiss me? 909 01:13:14,932 --> 01:13:16,976 What about lan? 910 01:13:20,062 --> 01:13:21,898 We all make mistakes. 911 01:13:29,155 --> 01:13:30,990 Where do you want it? 912 01:13:34,327 --> 01:13:36,913 Can I ask you a question? 913 01:13:37,038 --> 01:13:38,372 Yeah. 914 01:13:39,373 --> 01:13:41,417 How do you feel about Lisa? 915 01:13:42,585 --> 01:13:44,086 I love her. 916 01:13:45,755 --> 01:13:48,216 That's what I figured. 917 01:13:48,341 --> 01:13:49,759 But, um... 918 01:13:52,178 --> 01:13:54,764 ...I mean, it's definitely a different kind of love, you know. 919 01:13:54,889 --> 01:13:58,142 It's... it's more sisterly, you know, 920 01:13:58,267 --> 01:14:00,353 like big sisterly, kind of. 921 01:14:01,354 --> 01:14:03,272 But she's so beautiful. 922 01:14:06,609 --> 01:14:08,611 Yeah, she's really beautiful. 923 01:14:09,904 --> 01:14:12,406 And her body is... 924 01:14:12,531 --> 01:14:14,158 It's gorgeous. 925 01:14:15,243 --> 01:14:17,078 It's a nice figure. 926 01:14:18,204 --> 01:14:19,455 So... 927 01:14:22,375 --> 01:14:25,127 I mean, what would I be compared to her? 928 01:14:26,045 --> 01:14:31,884 Deb, Lisa is everything I ever wanted in a girl... 929 01:14:33,761 --> 01:14:36,430 ...before I knew what I wanted. 930 01:14:36,555 --> 01:14:41,769 I know that if I could do it again... I'd make her just like you. 931 01:14:45,356 --> 01:14:46,816 Honest. 932 01:14:55,825 --> 01:14:59,078 Dead honest. I'm like... I... You know, I... 933 01:14:59,203 --> 01:15:00,913 I gotta tell you cos I'm really honest when I say that. 934 01:15:01,038 --> 01:15:03,874 I'm so very honest. I mean that. 935 01:15:55,134 --> 01:15:56,802 What the hell? 936 01:15:59,263 --> 01:16:02,850 That little bastard. That little... 937 01:16:04,060 --> 01:16:06,395 Please don't let him have messed up my room. 938 01:16:06,520 --> 01:16:08,856 If my room's OK, I won't kill him, I promise. 939 01:16:08,981 --> 01:16:11,150 I'll just hurt him real bad. 940 01:16:40,262 --> 01:16:41,680 Freeze. 941 01:16:43,432 --> 01:16:44,683 Chet! 942 01:16:45,267 --> 01:16:47,561 Where's my brother? 943 01:16:47,686 --> 01:16:49,021 Ow! 944 01:16:49,980 --> 01:16:52,525 Uhh... I don't know. 945 01:16:53,859 --> 01:16:55,694 You're dead meat, pilgrim. 946 01:16:58,072 --> 01:17:00,241 Um... 947 01:17:00,366 --> 01:17:03,119 Chet, Chet, Chet, Chet, Chet, that's her nose. Come on. 948 01:17:03,244 --> 01:17:04,995 Now, look, she has nothing to do with it. 949 01:17:05,121 --> 01:17:08,416 OK. You die. 950 01:17:08,541 --> 01:17:11,210 She walks out of here with a severe limp. 951 01:17:17,216 --> 01:17:18,300 Aargh. 952 01:17:19,301 --> 01:17:20,928 I'll be back. 953 01:17:25,933 --> 01:17:30,312 That's Wyatt's older brother, Chet. He's kind of an asshole. 954 01:17:33,357 --> 01:17:35,109 Oh, hi, Chet. 955 01:17:35,234 --> 01:17:38,487 What the hell is going on around here? 956 01:17:38,612 --> 01:17:40,531 Chet, I'm sorry, it was an accident. 957 01:17:40,656 --> 01:17:42,908 An accident? An accident? 958 01:17:43,742 --> 01:17:47,371 Do you realize it's snowing in my room, goddamn it? 959 01:17:48,164 --> 01:17:50,166 Some real weird shit happened, Chet. Some real weird... 960 01:17:50,291 --> 01:17:54,086 You don't have to be a genius to figure that out, monkey dick. 961 01:17:56,005 --> 01:17:59,884 - Start talking, little man. - Look, Chet, it's a real long story. 962 01:18:00,009 --> 01:18:01,886 Gary and I were messing around with the computer Friday night, 963 01:18:02,011 --> 01:18:04,638 and we decided to make a woman, and she went crazy and messed up the house. 964 01:18:04,763 --> 01:18:07,725 Don't smart-mouth me, you wormy little shit! 965 01:18:07,850 --> 01:18:09,310 Why don't you just leave him alone? 966 01:18:09,435 --> 01:18:11,896 Stay out of this, bimbo. This is a family matter. 967 01:18:12,021 --> 01:18:15,774 Chet, just let me find Lisa. She can explain everything. 968 01:18:15,900 --> 01:18:19,153 She'll clear everything up, Chet. I swear. Chet. 969 01:18:19,278 --> 01:18:23,824 You can have my college money and my social security, Chet. 970 01:18:25,284 --> 01:18:27,161 Chet... 971 01:18:29,413 --> 01:18:33,501 So, you guys think you can pull one over on me, huh? 972 01:18:33,626 --> 01:18:34,960 Huh? 973 01:18:35,085 --> 01:18:38,797 You got everybody synched to the same bullshit story. 974 01:18:38,923 --> 01:18:42,384 This isn't bullshit. This is a Pershing missile, Chip. 975 01:18:42,510 --> 01:18:44,345 It's Chet. 976 01:18:44,845 --> 01:18:46,472 My name is Chet. 977 01:18:48,432 --> 01:18:51,393 And I didn't think it was a whale's dick, honey. 978 01:18:55,272 --> 01:18:57,274 Hi, Nanny. Hi, Grampy. 979 01:18:59,235 --> 01:19:01,612 I'm not a moron, you know. I... 980 01:19:05,491 --> 01:19:07,159 Was that my grandparents? 981 01:19:12,873 --> 01:19:16,210 - Are they dead? - Oh, no, they're just resting. 982 01:19:16,335 --> 01:19:18,754 What are they doing in here? 983 01:19:18,879 --> 01:19:21,173 I put them in there. 984 01:19:21,298 --> 01:19:24,009 I didn't want the boys to get into trouble. 985 01:19:24,677 --> 01:19:27,888 And quite frankly, they weren't having a very good time at the party. 986 01:19:28,013 --> 01:19:29,765 Not having a good time? 987 01:19:29,890 --> 01:19:33,477 Do you think they're having a good time being catatonic in a closet? 988 01:19:35,104 --> 01:19:39,483 Do you have any idea how disrespectful that is? 989 01:19:40,484 --> 01:19:45,114 Boy, I wouldn't give a squirt of piss for your ass right now. 990 01:19:50,578 --> 01:19:53,581 OK, that's quite enough. You guys get the girls home. 991 01:19:53,706 --> 01:19:57,876 Wyatt, take the Porsche. Gary, you take the Ferrari. 992 01:19:58,002 --> 01:19:59,253 The Ferrari? 993 01:20:00,421 --> 01:20:02,423 I want to be alone with Chet here. 994 01:20:02,548 --> 01:20:04,592 - Good to see you again, Chet. - Get out of here! 995 01:20:04,717 --> 01:20:06,719 Come on, take your little hussies home! 996 01:20:06,844 --> 01:20:09,513 Their parents are probably worried sick. 997 01:20:12,057 --> 01:20:17,313 Lady, I want to get to the bottom of this, A.S.A.F.P. 998 01:20:17,438 --> 01:20:19,273 Oh, so do I. 999 01:20:21,567 --> 01:20:25,112 But first, I'd like to... butter your muffin. 1000 01:20:25,237 --> 01:20:27,239 Why do you have to be such a wanker? 1001 01:20:27,364 --> 01:20:29,408 Because I get off on it. 1002 01:20:29,533 --> 01:20:33,662 Now I want you to promise that you'll keep your big mouth shut 1003 01:20:33,787 --> 01:20:36,415 about everything that has happened here this weekend. 1004 01:20:36,540 --> 01:20:40,210 And I want you to treat Wyatt and Gary with dignity and respect. 1005 01:20:40,336 --> 01:20:42,129 Oh, really? 1006 01:20:42,254 --> 01:20:44,006 Yeah. Oh, really. 1007 01:20:45,758 --> 01:20:51,680 I can be a real serious bitch if I don't get what I want. 1008 01:20:51,805 --> 01:20:55,559 Ooh, hit me with your best shot. 1009 01:21:01,398 --> 01:21:03,484 How fast are you going? 1010 01:21:03,609 --> 01:21:05,110 About 35. 1011 01:21:16,830 --> 01:21:20,626 - Wait. This can't be right. - Are you looking at the RPMs? 1012 01:21:20,751 --> 01:21:24,046 No, I think I'm looking at about fifty tickets. 1013 01:21:39,520 --> 01:21:40,938 Bye! 1014 01:22:11,427 --> 01:22:13,262 Goddamn train! 1015 01:22:13,387 --> 01:22:15,639 Oh, my. Phew! 1016 01:22:16,557 --> 01:22:18,475 That was great! 1017 01:22:27,484 --> 01:22:28,902 You son of a bitch! 1018 01:22:29,027 --> 01:22:32,656 All Al! Al, that was Gary! 1019 01:22:32,781 --> 01:22:35,325 Who is this Gary character? 1020 01:22:38,120 --> 01:22:40,622 I had a really great time last night. 1021 01:22:42,124 --> 01:22:45,669 I'll probably be grounded for a month or so, but... 1022 01:22:47,421 --> 01:22:49,047 I'll wait for you. 1023 01:23:24,750 --> 01:23:26,585 Hilly! 1024 01:23:26,710 --> 01:23:28,337 I love you! 1025 01:23:35,677 --> 01:23:37,304 Alright! 1026 01:23:42,684 --> 01:23:44,561 I want to thank you for a great night. 1027 01:23:44,686 --> 01:23:46,104 Same here. 1028 01:23:48,524 --> 01:23:50,776 Deb, I have kind of a confession to make. 1029 01:23:54,947 --> 01:23:57,032 I'm really not this cool. 1030 01:23:58,575 --> 01:24:00,619 That's not my car. 1031 01:24:00,744 --> 01:24:03,163 This is not my suit. 1032 01:24:03,288 --> 01:24:05,916 I mean, none of those people were my friends. 1033 01:24:07,000 --> 01:24:09,419 Why are you telling me all of this? 1034 01:24:11,380 --> 01:24:14,132 Because I want you to like me for what I am. 1035 01:24:14,258 --> 01:24:16,718 Whatever you are, I like it. 1036 01:24:36,738 --> 01:24:40,534 Well, um, I'd better get going, cos, um... 1037 01:24:42,035 --> 01:24:44,079 ...Wyatt and I still have to deal with Chet. 1038 01:24:44,204 --> 01:24:46,248 Quit screwing around! 1039 01:24:46,373 --> 01:24:49,376 This ain't funny, you stupid bitch! 1040 01:24:49,501 --> 01:24:52,421 Oh, now careful, Chet. Don't make me angry. 1041 01:24:52,546 --> 01:24:53,881 Sorry. 1042 01:24:57,259 --> 01:24:59,094 That's better. 1043 01:24:59,219 --> 01:25:02,681 Would you please turn me back to normal, please? 1044 01:25:02,806 --> 01:25:05,309 I haven't done anything to you. 1045 01:25:05,434 --> 01:25:07,853 No, but you've done plenty to your brother. 1046 01:25:07,978 --> 01:25:11,356 - Like what? - Well, let me see... 1047 01:25:11,481 --> 01:25:14,526 You've nagged him, harassed him, suppressed him, 1048 01:25:14,651 --> 01:25:17,696 kept him in fear of you, extorted money from him. 1049 01:25:17,821 --> 01:25:19,907 It's done out of love. 1050 01:25:20,574 --> 01:25:23,869 Just for that, I ought to give you a set of elephant balls. 1051 01:25:30,042 --> 01:25:34,046 Give me your word that you'll leave Wyatt and Gary alone, 1052 01:25:34,171 --> 01:25:35,797 and I'll change you back. 1053 01:25:35,923 --> 01:25:38,508 Oh, all right. 1054 01:25:38,634 --> 01:25:40,636 Shake on it, huh? 1055 01:25:42,846 --> 01:25:45,223 No, thanks. I'd rather not. 1056 01:25:46,350 --> 01:25:48,310 Wait! Where are you going? 1057 01:25:49,353 --> 01:25:51,605 Well, I have to go and get changed. 1058 01:25:51,730 --> 01:25:54,358 - What about me? - What about you? You'll be fine. 1059 01:25:54,483 --> 01:25:57,027 It just takes a little while for the effect to wear off, OK? 1060 01:26:09,498 --> 01:26:10,666 Well? 1061 01:26:11,959 --> 01:26:13,794 I'm in love. 1062 01:26:13,919 --> 01:26:16,630 - It's great, isn't it? - The best. 1063 01:26:16,755 --> 01:26:19,299 You know, I'll tell you, Wyatt, 1064 01:26:19,424 --> 01:26:21,385 I think things are turning around for us. 1065 01:26:21,510 --> 01:26:22,928 I mean it. 1066 01:26:23,053 --> 01:26:25,138 OK, what about Lisa? 1067 01:26:28,892 --> 01:26:31,019 Well, I think we're gonna have to have a talk with her. 1068 01:26:32,896 --> 01:26:34,648 Think she'll understand? 1069 01:26:35,691 --> 01:26:38,318 I think so. I mean, uh... 1070 01:26:38,443 --> 01:26:40,988 I sure as hell wouldn't want to date you. 1071 01:26:42,698 --> 01:26:45,033 You're not my type, you know. 1072 01:26:51,456 --> 01:26:52,833 Chet? 1073 01:26:53,750 --> 01:26:54,960 Chet? 1074 01:26:56,837 --> 01:26:58,255 Hi, dudes! 1075 01:27:02,509 --> 01:27:04,678 I'm sorry, Wyatt. 1076 01:27:04,803 --> 01:27:08,181 I'm sorry for being such a shit to you all these years. 1077 01:27:08,890 --> 01:27:11,977 And, gee, well, I want you to know that... 1078 01:27:13,270 --> 01:27:14,980 ...I love you. 1079 01:27:19,901 --> 01:27:21,903 That's nasty, Wyatt. 1080 01:27:22,779 --> 01:27:24,781 That's Chet, Gary. 1081 01:27:26,283 --> 01:27:28,326 Hey, hey, huh... 1082 01:27:34,374 --> 01:27:35,625 Hmm! 1083 01:27:37,461 --> 01:27:38,920 Oh, my God! 1084 01:27:41,840 --> 01:27:43,383 Lisa? 1085 01:27:43,508 --> 01:27:45,093 In here! 1086 01:27:45,218 --> 01:27:47,554 - Lisa? - Yeah? 1087 01:27:48,555 --> 01:27:51,767 - You saw Chet? - Yes, I did. 1088 01:27:51,892 --> 01:27:53,894 You responsible? 1089 01:27:54,978 --> 01:27:56,396 Yes, I am. 1090 01:27:56,521 --> 01:27:58,732 Lisa, we can't have him like that. 1091 01:28:00,233 --> 01:28:02,277 It'd ruin Christmas. 1092 01:28:03,653 --> 01:28:05,906 Listen, he's gonna be fine in half an hour. 1093 01:28:06,031 --> 01:28:09,242 He's not going to spoil Christmas. 1094 01:28:09,367 --> 01:28:12,579 And he's not going to bug you anymore, either. 1095 01:28:12,704 --> 01:28:14,539 Um... 1096 01:28:15,415 --> 01:28:18,502 Lisa, we have to have a talk with you. 1097 01:28:18,627 --> 01:28:20,837 What's on your mind? 1098 01:28:21,630 --> 01:28:24,591 I really don't know how to say this to you. 1099 01:28:25,258 --> 01:28:27,344 You guys found girlfriends, right? 1100 01:28:29,763 --> 01:28:33,558 Fell in love with the two girls, and they fell in love with you. 1101 01:28:34,559 --> 01:28:36,978 That's all I ever wanted for you. 1102 01:28:37,979 --> 01:28:39,564 You're not hurt? 1103 01:28:41,149 --> 01:28:43,360 Yeah, sure I'm hurt. 1104 01:28:44,194 --> 01:28:46,655 But I wouldn't change it. 1105 01:28:48,406 --> 01:28:52,661 I'm really just getting off seeing you two guys straightened out. 1106 01:29:02,212 --> 01:29:04,214 I have to go. 1107 01:29:20,772 --> 01:29:22,149 Oh... 1108 01:29:23,150 --> 01:29:25,235 I've had a wonderful time. 1109 01:29:35,787 --> 01:29:37,455 Lisa... 1110 01:29:40,000 --> 01:29:41,418 Bye. 1111 01:30:59,412 --> 01:31:00,830 Boys? 1112 01:31:01,831 --> 01:31:03,416 We're home! 1113 01:31:08,380 --> 01:31:11,841 - Hi, Mr. Donnelly. How are you? - Hi, honey. 1114 01:31:12,425 --> 01:31:15,095 - Dad, hi. - No, no, no, no. Like a man. 1115 01:31:16,054 --> 01:31:19,391 So, what did you guys do this weekend? 1116 01:31:19,516 --> 01:31:22,602 - Not much. - Just hung around the house, you know. 1117 01:31:22,727 --> 01:31:24,729 Daddy had this crazy notion 1118 01:31:24,854 --> 01:31:28,441 you guys might throw a party or do something nutty. 1119 01:31:28,566 --> 01:31:30,235 - Ha-hal! - Shit. 1120 01:31:30,360 --> 01:31:31,778 - Not us. - Not here. 1121 01:31:31,903 --> 01:31:33,196 No way. 1122 01:31:55,302 --> 01:31:56,803 Shh, shh! 1123 01:32:17,824 --> 01:32:22,203 OK... drop and give me twenty. 84911