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1
00:00:06,658 --> 00:00:08,356
Hey, there's a guy
who looks like he's ready
2
00:00:08,399 --> 00:00:11,837
to take the world by the balls
and never stop squeezing.
3
00:00:11,881 --> 00:00:13,317
-Oh, that's it?
-That's it.
4
00:00:13,361 --> 00:00:16,016
-How nice and simple.
-Here, eat this.
5
00:00:16,059 --> 00:00:17,713
-This for me?
-Yeah, breakfast burrito!
6
00:00:17,756 --> 00:00:19,367
I can't have my business partner
pounding the pavement
7
00:00:19,410 --> 00:00:21,543
-on an empty stomach.
-Oh, my God!
8
00:00:24,154 --> 00:00:27,549
Fuck, come on, man.
Smaller bites, smaller bites!
9
00:00:27,592 --> 00:00:31,422
Yeah, or maybe make
a tighter burrito...?
10
00:00:31,466 --> 00:00:33,120
Really?
11
00:00:36,123 --> 00:00:38,473
-Was that our first fight?
-Yeah, I think so.
12
00:00:38,516 --> 00:00:40,736
[chuckles]
Well done.
13
00:00:40,779 --> 00:00:42,694
-You, too.
-Let me get that for ya.
14
00:00:42,738 --> 00:00:44,827
[whirring]
15
00:00:46,524 --> 00:00:48,091
That's working
like a charm.
16
00:00:48,135 --> 00:00:50,093
-Aw!
-Oh, man!
17
00:00:50,137 --> 00:00:51,442
That was my best vacuum.
18
00:00:51,486 --> 00:00:53,531
Damn it,
that was my only tie.
19
00:00:53,575 --> 00:00:55,359
Well, it was your tie,
but all right.
20
00:00:55,403 --> 00:00:57,361
Well, I better take
my leave.
21
00:00:57,405 --> 00:00:58,928
Don't wanna be late
on my first day,
22
00:00:58,971 --> 00:01:00,364
-right, business partner?
-You're right.
23
00:01:00,408 --> 00:01:01,931
-Here, don't forget this.
-No, no, no.
24
00:01:01,974 --> 00:01:02,932
I'm not really a coffee guy.
Makes me shit.
25
00:01:02,975 --> 00:01:04,629
Neither am I.
26
00:01:06,979 --> 00:01:09,591
-Fuck, what?
-Thermos bong.
27
00:01:09,634 --> 00:01:11,158
-What do you think?
-I think
28
00:01:11,201 --> 00:01:13,377
you're the best
business decision I ever made.
29
00:01:13,421 --> 00:01:15,118
Time for a quick rip?
30
00:01:15,162 --> 00:01:16,946
It's 8:00
in the morning.
31
00:01:16,989 --> 00:01:18,339
-Yeah, right.
-I'm just kidding!
32
00:01:18,382 --> 00:01:19,340
Oh, fuck,
you got me, man!
33
00:01:19,383 --> 00:01:22,256
♪
34
00:01:51,763 --> 00:01:53,635
♪
35
00:01:53,678 --> 00:01:55,202
Kevin Pavarotti?
36
00:01:55,245 --> 00:01:57,160
Uh, yeah.
Close enough.
37
00:01:57,204 --> 00:02:00,032
Hi, I'm Spencer.
I manage the store.
38
00:02:00,076 --> 00:02:01,469
What? "The" Spencer?
39
00:02:01,512 --> 00:02:03,558
No. It's just
a fortunate coincidence.
40
00:02:03,601 --> 00:02:04,820
I'll say.
41
00:02:04,863 --> 00:02:06,169
Uh, let me show you
the problem.
42
00:02:06,213 --> 00:02:07,475
So, when I go to close up
for the night,
43
00:02:07,518 --> 00:02:10,782
these lights just won't
shut off.
44
00:02:10,826 --> 00:02:13,045
-Mm-hmm.
-Our electric bill is insane.
45
00:02:13,089 --> 00:02:14,656
I bet. Okay.
46
00:02:14,699 --> 00:02:17,137
Well-- shit.
Well, sir,
47
00:02:17,180 --> 00:02:20,662
I am a true professional
and I will not rest
48
00:02:20,705 --> 00:02:22,098
until I solve
your ghost case.
49
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:26,015
Oh, my God.
50
00:02:27,277 --> 00:02:29,366
Oh, Pac,
you have made it.
51
00:02:29,410 --> 00:02:31,020
[chuckles]
52
00:02:31,063 --> 00:02:34,197
Lap of luxur-- shit.
53
00:02:34,241 --> 00:02:36,199
Hey. Hey, hey, hey.
54
00:02:36,243 --> 00:02:38,245
-No, no, shh.
-Hey, I was enjoying that!
55
00:02:38,288 --> 00:02:41,204
No, shh, no, no, no, man.
The show is on.
56
00:02:41,248 --> 00:02:42,814
You're talking
about that?
57
00:02:42,858 --> 00:02:44,903
That is not a show.
That's a lamp, okay?
58
00:02:44,947 --> 00:02:46,644
Shows have things like
characters and storylines
59
00:02:46,688 --> 00:02:48,559
and-- oh, shit.
60
00:02:48,603 --> 00:02:51,258
That one just split into two.
Look at the little baby.
61
00:02:51,301 --> 00:02:53,085
I hope the baby's okay.
62
00:02:53,129 --> 00:02:55,305
All right.
I get it.
63
00:02:55,349 --> 00:02:56,828
That's a good show.
64
00:02:56,872 --> 00:02:59,483
But, unfortunately,
65
00:02:59,527 --> 00:03:01,746
the show's
been cancelled.
66
00:03:01,790 --> 00:03:04,619
Oh, boo, man!
Not cool!
67
00:03:04,662 --> 00:03:08,231
-Who are you?
-I am Pac.
68
00:03:08,275 --> 00:03:09,972
-Well, I'm Weasel.
-Well, Weasel,
69
00:03:10,015 --> 00:03:12,540
I am a medium
and I'm here to help you.
70
00:03:12,583 --> 00:03:15,151
-You can see ghosts?
-I can.
71
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:18,502
-Prove it.
-Like, by talking to you?
72
00:03:18,546 --> 00:03:20,330
Yeah.
73
00:03:20,374 --> 00:03:22,376
-Oh. [laughs]
-Yeah, you got there.
74
00:03:22,419 --> 00:03:23,899
-Nice.
-Okay,
75
00:03:23,942 --> 00:03:25,248
tell me why you're
still sticking around.
76
00:03:25,292 --> 00:03:27,163
I don't really
remember, man.
77
00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:28,773
Okay.
78
00:03:28,817 --> 00:03:30,079
All right, then.
Fair enough.
79
00:03:30,122 --> 00:03:32,081
What is the last thing
you remember?
80
00:03:32,124 --> 00:03:35,084
-I was going somewhere.
-Okay.
81
00:03:35,127 --> 00:03:37,956
-Any idea? Oh!
-Uh, Taco's!
82
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:39,697
Going to get
some tacos.
83
00:03:39,741 --> 00:03:42,091
No, no, no. I was going
to my buddy Taco's.
84
00:03:42,134 --> 00:03:44,180
-You were going to your buddy.
-Yeah.
85
00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:45,442
-He is named Taco.
-Yeah!
86
00:03:45,486 --> 00:03:47,183
-Got it.
-Oh, wait. But, no. Hold on.
87
00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:49,490
He wasn't home. I was, like,
really fucking hungry.
88
00:03:49,533 --> 00:03:51,274
So I decided to go get
some tacos.
89
00:03:51,318 --> 00:03:53,102
You're going to go eat
some tacos. Okay.
90
00:03:53,145 --> 00:03:55,147
Now I'm totally on board.
Got it.
91
00:03:55,191 --> 00:03:57,802
But the taco place
was closed.
92
00:03:57,846 --> 00:04:01,545
So I decided
to go get Mushu instead.
93
00:04:01,589 --> 00:04:03,678
Mushu. Excellent choice.
You were still hungry,
94
00:04:03,721 --> 00:04:05,462
-after all.
-No, no, no, dude.
95
00:04:05,506 --> 00:04:08,204
-Mushu is my girlfriend.
-What the fuck, man?
96
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:10,380
She owed me money
and I decided to collect
97
00:04:10,424 --> 00:04:12,339
so I could go get some...
98
00:04:12,382 --> 00:04:14,036
-Tacos?
-...ice cream.
99
00:04:14,079 --> 00:04:16,081
No, man.
The taco place was closed.
100
00:04:16,125 --> 00:04:18,170
You're not listening?
101
00:04:19,998 --> 00:04:22,740
You're a bad medium.
You're not listening to me.
102
00:04:25,743 --> 00:04:27,615
...and that's when I settled
on Thai food.
103
00:04:27,658 --> 00:04:29,094
Okay, Weasel.
104
00:04:29,138 --> 00:04:31,706
What happened...
105
00:04:31,749 --> 00:04:33,795
after you ate?
106
00:04:33,838 --> 00:04:35,971
Oh, I had to fuel up
for the thing.
107
00:04:36,014 --> 00:04:39,453
-What thing?
-It's the Bong Pong-a-thon, man!
108
00:04:39,496 --> 00:04:42,107
It's, like, the biggest
bong pong tournament
109
00:04:42,151 --> 00:04:43,587
-in the Tri-state area.
-Okay,
110
00:04:43,631 --> 00:04:44,719
now we're
getting somewhere.
111
00:04:44,762 --> 00:04:46,808
What exactly
is bong pong?
112
00:04:46,851 --> 00:04:50,464
It's like beer pong
with a twist to it.
113
00:04:50,507 --> 00:04:52,335
Is the twist
that you smoke bongs
114
00:04:52,379 --> 00:04:53,510
instead of drinking beer?
115
00:04:53,554 --> 00:04:55,033
The greatest game ever.
116
00:04:55,077 --> 00:04:56,383
Did you ever make it
to that tournament?
117
00:04:56,426 --> 00:04:58,472
-No, man.
-No.
118
00:04:58,515 --> 00:05:00,343
I got hit
by a retard bus.
119
00:05:00,387 --> 00:05:01,779
Oops.
120
00:05:01,823 --> 00:05:03,651
I left my partner high
121
00:05:03,694 --> 00:05:05,566
and high.
122
00:05:05,609 --> 00:05:08,612
-Never won the championship.
-Okay, well, bingo.
123
00:05:08,656 --> 00:05:10,266
That's it. That's your
unfinished business.
124
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:13,008
We gotta find your partner
and win that tournament.
125
00:05:13,051 --> 00:05:14,575
Far out, man!
126
00:05:14,618 --> 00:05:16,446
All right, let's get
this show back on.
127
00:05:16,490 --> 00:05:18,753
Hey, who the fuck
are you again?
128
00:05:18,796 --> 00:05:20,145
Doesn't matter.
129
00:05:20,189 --> 00:05:24,193
♪
130
00:05:29,503 --> 00:05:31,243
It's busted.
131
00:05:31,287 --> 00:05:34,072
[saw whirring]
132
00:05:40,470 --> 00:05:41,950
Wait till you
meet Nugget, man.
133
00:05:41,993 --> 00:05:44,256
He's, like,
the chillest dude ever.
134
00:05:44,300 --> 00:05:45,823
Awesome.
I love chill dudes.
135
00:05:45,867 --> 00:05:47,999
Ahem.
136
00:05:48,043 --> 00:05:52,134
I believe I may be looking
for your son, Nugget?
137
00:05:52,177 --> 00:05:54,484
-Nugget?
-Nugget.
138
00:05:54,528 --> 00:05:57,400
No one's called me
that name in 25 years.
139
00:05:57,444 --> 00:06:00,534
Nugget?
Is that you, man?
140
00:06:00,577 --> 00:06:02,971
Holy shit, dude,
you've aged terribly.
141
00:06:03,014 --> 00:06:07,149
Okay, well, this is gonna sound,
maybe, a little bit weird,
142
00:06:07,192 --> 00:06:09,499
but I am a medium
and I have been talking
143
00:06:09,543 --> 00:06:11,153
to the ghost
of your old friend Weasel.
144
00:06:11,196 --> 00:06:13,721
"Easy Weasy"?
145
00:06:13,764 --> 00:06:15,418
-He needs your help.
-Of course!
146
00:06:15,462 --> 00:06:17,202
I'd do anything
for that guy.
147
00:06:17,246 --> 00:06:18,813
Okay, he needs you
to enter
148
00:06:18,856 --> 00:06:21,032
the annual Bong Pong-a-thon
this weekend
149
00:06:21,076 --> 00:06:23,774
and he needs you
to win.
150
00:06:23,818 --> 00:06:25,733
-I can't do that.
-Yes, you can.
151
00:06:25,776 --> 00:06:27,430
You just need
a little confidence.
152
00:06:27,474 --> 00:06:29,476
I'm the Chief Resident
and the Head of Neurosurgery
153
00:06:29,519 --> 00:06:31,216
at the most prestigious
hospital in the city.
154
00:06:33,131 --> 00:06:34,742
I can't smoke weed.
155
00:06:34,785 --> 00:06:36,831
-But we need you, Nugget.
-But we need you, Nugget!
156
00:06:36,874 --> 00:06:39,355
Nugget is dead.
157
00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:41,662
-[door closes]
-Whoa, man.
158
00:06:41,705 --> 00:06:43,968
Hold on.
159
00:06:44,012 --> 00:06:45,883
Nugget's dead, too?
160
00:06:45,927 --> 00:06:48,799
I feel like
I just saw him, man.
161
00:06:48,843 --> 00:06:50,627
Come on, let's go.
162
00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:55,240
Whoa.
163
00:06:55,284 --> 00:06:56,764
Of course I've heard
of bong pong.
164
00:06:56,807 --> 00:06:58,113
It's like beer pong,
but with a twist.
165
00:06:58,156 --> 00:06:59,549
Yeah, well,
the bigger twist
166
00:06:59,593 --> 00:07:01,116
is that this guy's partner,
Nugget,
167
00:07:01,159 --> 00:07:02,944
is a 40-year-old
brain surgeon
168
00:07:02,987 --> 00:07:04,728
who doesn't
smoke weed anymore.
169
00:07:04,772 --> 00:07:06,251
What are you doing?
170
00:07:06,295 --> 00:07:08,689
Well, you know
how our vacuum cleans good,
171
00:07:08,732 --> 00:07:10,168
but it doesn't
clean great
172
00:07:10,212 --> 00:07:11,866
and you and I
have sort of been trying
173
00:07:11,909 --> 00:07:14,477
to figure out ways
to make it more powerful?
174
00:07:14,521 --> 00:07:16,218
I've never once
thought about the vacuum.
175
00:07:16,261 --> 00:07:17,480
There's a huge market
176
00:07:17,524 --> 00:07:19,177
for industrial-strength
vacuums, man.
177
00:07:19,221 --> 00:07:20,614
I could knock on any door
in the city and sell one.
178
00:07:20,657 --> 00:07:22,398
Clyde, I believe you
and I don't care!
179
00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:24,052
I have a ghost case
to solve, man!
180
00:07:24,095 --> 00:07:26,097
Why don't you just ask the ghost
if you and I can enter?
181
00:07:27,751 --> 00:07:29,274
Uh, no go, bro.
182
00:07:29,318 --> 00:07:30,493
One of you
can play for me,
183
00:07:30,537 --> 00:07:32,843
but the other one
has to be,
184
00:07:32,887 --> 00:07:34,454
uh-- uh...
185
00:07:36,325 --> 00:07:38,414
...be, um,
186
00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:40,460
-we just saw him.
-Nugget?
187
00:07:40,503 --> 00:07:42,897
-That's right. Nugget, man.
-No go, bro.
188
00:07:42,940 --> 00:07:44,333
It's gotta be Nugget.
189
00:07:44,376 --> 00:07:47,075
-Okay.
-Team Brain Damage'd has to win.
190
00:07:47,118 --> 00:07:49,817
And it's not Team Brain Damage'd
without...
191
00:07:51,906 --> 00:07:53,516
Nugget!
192
00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:56,345
Nugget is
a brain surgeon, right?
193
00:07:56,388 --> 00:07:58,608
Pretty smart guy.
We're smart guys.
194
00:07:58,652 --> 00:08:00,697
-So...
-Right.
195
00:08:00,741 --> 00:08:02,133
All we have to do
196
00:08:02,177 --> 00:08:04,179
is fight smart guy fire
with smart guy fire.
197
00:08:05,397 --> 00:08:07,704
[siren blares]
198
00:08:11,055 --> 00:08:12,535
You again? What?
199
00:08:12,579 --> 00:08:13,928
What are you
doing here?
200
00:08:13,971 --> 00:08:15,538
Yeah, hi.
My brain is kind of fucked up.
201
00:08:15,582 --> 00:08:16,887
I was wondering if you could
take a look at it.
202
00:08:16,931 --> 00:08:19,411
-Excuse me?
-The tiger is in the barn!
203
00:08:19,455 --> 00:08:21,239
What-- hey!
204
00:08:21,283 --> 00:08:23,546
Hey! Ow!
Oh, stop that!
205
00:08:23,590 --> 00:08:24,721
Stop that, please!
206
00:08:24,765 --> 00:08:26,070
Hey, what the hell
is going on?
207
00:08:26,114 --> 00:08:27,942
-Come on, come on!
-Yes!
208
00:08:27,985 --> 00:08:29,596
-Mm!
-We have pictures of you
209
00:08:29,639 --> 00:08:31,772
in a private room
with a naked man.
210
00:08:31,815 --> 00:08:32,990
Looks like you're
gonna be competing
211
00:08:33,034 --> 00:08:35,123
in that Bong Pong-a-thon
after all.
212
00:08:35,166 --> 00:08:36,385
Guess you're not
the only smart one
213
00:08:36,428 --> 00:08:37,734
in the room now,
are ya, Doc?
214
00:08:37,778 --> 00:08:40,476
Your--
your lens cap is on.
215
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:41,608
-Pfft. [chuckles]
-Yeah, nice try.
216
00:08:41,651 --> 00:08:43,131
-Oh, shit.
-Fuck.
217
00:08:43,174 --> 00:08:44,828
I wish I could help,
but I haven't played
218
00:08:44,872 --> 00:08:46,569
bong pong in forever.
219
00:08:46,613 --> 00:08:49,267
I haven't even smoked weed
in, like, 25 years!
220
00:08:49,311 --> 00:08:53,010
You haven't smoked weed
in 25 years?
221
00:08:53,054 --> 00:08:54,534
Okay, all right,
you know what? Ahem.
222
00:08:54,577 --> 00:08:56,013
Fine, we will leave.
223
00:08:56,057 --> 00:08:57,624
Okay.
224
00:08:59,234 --> 00:09:01,584
But only after you
take a hit from this joint.
225
00:09:01,628 --> 00:09:03,760
I don't know.
I-- I'll pass.
226
00:09:03,804 --> 00:09:05,022
You can pass,
227
00:09:05,066 --> 00:09:07,024
but you've gotta
puff-puff first.
228
00:09:07,068 --> 00:09:09,026
If my wife found out
I was smoking pot again,
229
00:09:09,070 --> 00:09:10,593
-she'd ground me.
-[exhales]
230
00:09:10,637 --> 00:09:13,770
I mean she would leave me.
She'd leave me!
231
00:09:13,814 --> 00:09:15,685
Your wife sounds
like a huge cunt.
232
00:09:15,729 --> 00:09:17,208
She's very particular.
233
00:09:17,252 --> 00:09:18,949
Particularly huge cunt.
234
00:09:20,211 --> 00:09:21,735
I mean-- I mean,
sure, sure,
235
00:09:21,778 --> 00:09:23,475
we could have sex
more often
236
00:09:23,519 --> 00:09:24,955
than the third Thursday
of every month.
237
00:09:24,999 --> 00:09:26,478
And it's true,
238
00:09:26,522 --> 00:09:28,785
it could be a position
other than missionary.
239
00:09:28,829 --> 00:09:31,353
And, yeah,
she decided I was vegan,
240
00:09:31,396 --> 00:09:34,182
but a quinoa steak
241
00:09:34,225 --> 00:09:37,794
is--
[sighs]
242
00:09:37,838 --> 00:09:40,667
-give me that fucking joint.
-Yeah, here.
243
00:09:43,017 --> 00:09:44,801
-[sneezes]
-Ugh!
244
00:09:44,845 --> 00:09:46,847
Sorry.
245
00:09:46,890 --> 00:09:48,196
The first one
always makes me sneeze.
246
00:09:48,239 --> 00:09:49,676
Yeah, on my tits.
247
00:09:59,686 --> 00:10:01,078
Towel the door.
248
00:10:01,122 --> 00:10:03,254
Yes! I'll use my robe.
249
00:10:05,126 --> 00:10:07,171
Dr. Morris, dial 118.
250
00:10:07,215 --> 00:10:10,087
Nugget, now, you've been out
of the game for a long time.
251
00:10:10,131 --> 00:10:11,698
Long motherfuckin' time!
252
00:10:11,741 --> 00:10:13,438
And weed has changed.
253
00:10:13,482 --> 00:10:15,876
We got a whole bunch
of new strains and cross-strains
254
00:10:15,919 --> 00:10:17,529
and hybrids and...
255
00:10:17,573 --> 00:10:19,270
we wanna make sure
you're prepared out there.
256
00:10:19,314 --> 00:10:21,011
-Okay.
-That's why I've compiled
257
00:10:21,055 --> 00:10:23,797
every type of weed
that there is.
258
00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:26,277
-And we're...
-Gonna smoke the shit out of it?
259
00:10:26,321 --> 00:10:28,149
You bet we are!
260
00:10:28,192 --> 00:10:30,586
Oh, the batteries
are weird.
261
00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:33,110
You gotta--
you gotta get it just right.
262
00:10:33,154 --> 00:10:35,504
Montage song,
kick in already!
263
00:10:35,547 --> 00:10:37,637
♪
264
00:10:44,339 --> 00:10:46,254
Oh, that was close!
265
00:10:49,083 --> 00:10:51,085
[coughing]
266
00:10:51,128 --> 00:10:52,521
You're fucking sad,
both of you.
267
00:10:52,564 --> 00:10:54,784
-Throw shorter.
-[coughing]
268
00:10:54,828 --> 00:10:56,743
Oh, God.
269
00:10:56,786 --> 00:10:58,570
Throw fucking shorter.
270
00:11:01,138 --> 00:11:02,792
[coughs]
271
00:11:02,836 --> 00:11:04,228
Oh!
272
00:11:04,272 --> 00:11:06,709
-Oh!
-[pager beeping]
273
00:11:06,753 --> 00:11:08,363
What? Open up.
274
00:11:10,060 --> 00:11:12,062
I'm supposed to be operating
on the mayor.
275
00:11:13,716 --> 00:11:15,326
Right now.
276
00:11:22,029 --> 00:11:24,205
[coughing]
277
00:11:24,248 --> 00:11:25,685
Oh.
278
00:11:25,728 --> 00:11:26,990
But seriously,
I have to go.
279
00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:30,080
[monitor beeping]
280
00:11:30,124 --> 00:11:31,952
Scalpel.
281
00:11:32,953 --> 00:11:34,606
Forceps.
282
00:11:36,043 --> 00:11:37,827
Doritos...?
283
00:11:38,828 --> 00:11:40,308
No?
284
00:11:40,351 --> 00:11:42,876
How about, uh-- how about
some reggae music?
285
00:11:42,919 --> 00:11:44,791
Huh, set the mood?
286
00:11:46,314 --> 00:11:49,056
All right, let's put
a clamp on that.
287
00:11:49,099 --> 00:11:50,666
[monitor beeping]
288
00:11:52,973 --> 00:11:54,104
Are we still
doing this?
289
00:11:54,148 --> 00:11:56,977
-Cue the music.
-Sweet!
290
00:11:57,020 --> 00:11:59,762
Come on!
291
00:12:00,807 --> 00:12:02,460
♪
292
00:12:04,854 --> 00:12:06,029
[grunting]
293
00:12:15,169 --> 00:12:16,823
Wait, how--
how is this useful?
294
00:12:16,866 --> 00:12:18,476
Shh, just trust
the process.
295
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:20,174
Okay.
296
00:12:20,217 --> 00:12:23,612
♪
297
00:12:31,489 --> 00:12:33,274
[gasps]
298
00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:37,539
Ah, yeah!
299
00:12:37,582 --> 00:12:41,369
This was
such a great day!
300
00:12:41,412 --> 00:12:44,764
Oh, we are gonna crush
this "tourniement" tomorrow.
301
00:12:44,807 --> 00:12:47,027
"Tourniement."
302
00:12:47,070 --> 00:12:49,812
"Tourniement," is that--
is that right?
303
00:12:49,856 --> 00:12:51,205
Tournament.
304
00:12:51,248 --> 00:12:52,946
No, no, that's definitely
not right.
305
00:12:52,989 --> 00:12:54,730
Tournam--
306
00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:57,559
holy shit,
I have no idea anymore.
307
00:12:57,602 --> 00:13:00,823
Tour-na-ment.
308
00:13:00,867 --> 00:13:04,566
-"Tour-nament."
-"Tour-na-ment."
309
00:13:04,609 --> 00:13:06,524
Alfred!
310
00:13:06,568 --> 00:13:09,092
Alfred, are you...?
311
00:13:09,136 --> 00:13:10,615
Stoned?
312
00:13:10,659 --> 00:13:12,139
No.
313
00:13:12,182 --> 00:13:14,750
You're grounded.
No tournament for you.
314
00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:16,404
That sounds right.
315
00:13:16,447 --> 00:13:17,405
Who are you?
316
00:13:17,448 --> 00:13:19,233
That's--
317
00:13:21,888 --> 00:13:23,150
Alfred, come.
318
00:13:23,193 --> 00:13:26,022
♪
319
00:13:29,591 --> 00:13:32,376
I'm sorry, guys. I can't do
the Bong Pong-a-thon.
320
00:13:32,420 --> 00:13:34,204
Shelly really
put her foot down.
321
00:13:34,248 --> 00:13:35,989
Hey, we're gonna
break you out.
322
00:13:36,032 --> 00:13:38,730
Wait, why are you
whispering?
323
00:13:38,774 --> 00:13:41,385
Oh, I don't know. Duh.
[chuckles]
324
00:13:41,429 --> 00:13:43,779
It's useless. She's--
she's got me on lockdown.
325
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:46,173
It's cool.
We got a plan.
326
00:13:46,216 --> 00:13:47,783
Does your plan involve
327
00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:49,524
trying to pose my wife
with a naked guy
328
00:13:49,567 --> 00:13:51,352
and then using the pictures
as blackmail?
329
00:13:51,395 --> 00:13:53,049
No!
330
00:13:53,093 --> 00:13:55,095
We need a new plan.
331
00:13:55,138 --> 00:13:57,358
I've got one.
332
00:13:57,401 --> 00:14:01,275
♪
333
00:14:01,318 --> 00:14:03,190
[knocking on door]
334
00:14:03,233 --> 00:14:05,235
Well, isn't today
your lucky day?
335
00:14:05,279 --> 00:14:06,671
-Can I help you?
-No.
336
00:14:06,715 --> 00:14:08,630
But I can help you.
337
00:14:08,673 --> 00:14:09,892
Really?
338
00:14:09,936 --> 00:14:11,676
Jack Slenderson,
Clypac Vacuums.
339
00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:13,287
I'm sure you've
heard of us.
340
00:14:13,330 --> 00:14:16,116
We're one of the big dogs
in the vacuum community.
341
00:14:16,159 --> 00:14:17,595
I haven't.
342
00:14:17,639 --> 00:14:21,121
-Excuse me.
-W-wait, uh, shoes off!
343
00:14:21,164 --> 00:14:23,427
Now, when the science doctors
at Clypac
344
00:14:23,471 --> 00:14:24,994
set out
to revolutionize
345
00:14:25,038 --> 00:14:26,561
the way we suck shit
up off the floor,
346
00:14:26,604 --> 00:14:28,911
they knew they had to think
outside the box.
347
00:14:28,955 --> 00:14:32,915
Which is why this comes
in a case.
348
00:14:32,959 --> 00:14:34,264
That's still a box.
349
00:14:34,308 --> 00:14:37,746
May I... cunt-inue?
350
00:14:37,789 --> 00:14:39,922
See that blue cord?
351
00:14:39,966 --> 00:14:41,881
That blue cord hooks up
to the Internet.
352
00:14:41,924 --> 00:14:43,752
That's what really makes
the R2D2
353
00:14:43,795 --> 00:14:45,232
so incredibly special.
354
00:14:45,275 --> 00:14:47,060
Now, the R2D1 did not have
several features.
355
00:14:47,103 --> 00:14:48,931
Obviously, you've got
some nice fancy lights here,
356
00:14:48,975 --> 00:14:50,759
but it's
incredibly functional.
357
00:14:50,802 --> 00:14:52,804
In fact, let's fire it up
right now!
358
00:14:52,848 --> 00:14:54,894
-[whirring]
-You feel that power?
359
00:14:54,937 --> 00:14:57,026
You feel the power
in your pussy?
360
00:14:57,070 --> 00:14:59,986
It's like Christmas
following a Sunday morning!
361
00:15:00,029 --> 00:15:02,336
-It's very loud!
-You know who hates this sound?
362
00:15:02,379 --> 00:15:04,816
-Dirt.
-I do, too!
363
00:15:06,644 --> 00:15:10,170
♪
364
00:15:10,213 --> 00:15:12,346
[laughing, chatter]
365
00:15:19,396 --> 00:15:21,746
Oh, uh, excuse me. Do you know
where the sign-in is?
366
00:15:21,790 --> 00:15:23,618
Oh, yeah, sure!
367
00:15:23,661 --> 00:15:26,316
It's just right up inside
my sister's stretched-out pussy.
368
00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:27,927
Oh.
369
00:15:29,450 --> 00:15:31,234
Did she say it was
in her sister's pussy?
370
00:15:31,278 --> 00:15:32,714
"Stretched-out pussy."
371
00:15:32,757 --> 00:15:35,630
You did it, man.
You got Nugget.
372
00:15:35,673 --> 00:15:37,719
Yeah. Some of the competition
around here is pretty mean.
373
00:15:37,762 --> 00:15:41,375
The key to bong pong
is extreme focus.
374
00:15:41,418 --> 00:15:43,594
Like, laser-fucking foc--
375
00:15:43,638 --> 00:15:45,683
holy shit, man, look!
376
00:15:47,033 --> 00:15:49,078
Okay, come on.
Let's go do this.
377
00:15:49,122 --> 00:15:52,212
♪
378
00:15:54,127 --> 00:15:56,303
Here we are
at the 36th Annual
379
00:15:56,346 --> 00:15:57,652
Bong Pong-a-thon.
380
00:15:57,695 --> 00:15:59,654
Where does the time go,
huh, Gary?
381
00:15:59,697 --> 00:16:02,004
It's un-fucking-believable,
Jerry.
382
00:16:02,048 --> 00:16:04,833
It really is.
Really is.
383
00:16:04,876 --> 00:16:06,530
First-round matches
are underway
384
00:16:06,574 --> 00:16:08,184
and right now,
Team Brain Damage'd
385
00:16:08,228 --> 00:16:10,143
find themselves in the middle
of a real bong burner
386
00:16:10,186 --> 00:16:12,145
with the Frat Buds.
387
00:16:12,188 --> 00:16:14,060
Hey, just...
[breathes deeply]
388
00:16:14,103 --> 00:16:16,149
[exhales]
389
00:16:17,759 --> 00:16:19,979
Team Brain Damage'd
working off the dust.
390
00:16:20,022 --> 00:16:21,850
Right again,
Jer-bear.
391
00:16:21,893 --> 00:16:23,460
-[applause]
-Come on! What's going on?
392
00:16:23,504 --> 00:16:25,419
I don't know.
I-- I'm nervous, I guess.
393
00:16:25,462 --> 00:16:28,030
Nervous? You're-- you're
a fucking brain surgeon.
394
00:16:28,074 --> 00:16:29,118
Yeah, but that's
different.
395
00:16:29,162 --> 00:16:31,251
This is
the Bong Pong-a-thon.
396
00:16:31,294 --> 00:16:32,600
The stakes
are so high!
397
00:16:32,643 --> 00:16:34,036
Just try and relax
and have some fun.
398
00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:35,342
How am I supposed to
relax and have fun?
399
00:16:35,385 --> 00:16:37,387
[crowd cheers]
Yeah!
400
00:16:39,041 --> 00:16:41,652
Why don't you
let 'er rip there, Nuggles?
401
00:16:41,696 --> 00:16:43,872
[pipe gurgling]
402
00:16:43,915 --> 00:16:45,439
[crowd murmurs]
Whoa!
403
00:16:52,228 --> 00:16:53,360
Wow!
404
00:16:56,058 --> 00:16:58,017
[applause, whistling]
405
00:16:58,060 --> 00:16:59,975
That was
a huge hit, Gary!
406
00:17:00,019 --> 00:17:01,672
He's really taking it up
a notch.
407
00:17:01,716 --> 00:17:03,239
I wasn't even looking.
Totally missed it, Jerry.
408
00:17:09,158 --> 00:17:10,551
[grunts]
Yes!
409
00:17:10,594 --> 00:17:12,466
The doctor is in!
410
00:17:12,509 --> 00:17:13,945
He's a brain surgeon.
411
00:17:13,989 --> 00:17:15,643
I am a brain surgeon.
412
00:17:15,686 --> 00:17:18,124
♪
413
00:17:18,167 --> 00:17:19,429
[cheering]
414
00:17:38,274 --> 00:17:40,885
That's what
I'm talking about!
415
00:17:40,929 --> 00:17:42,583
-Whoo!
-It's awesome!
416
00:17:45,151 --> 00:17:47,153
-Whoa!
-[laughing]
417
00:17:49,503 --> 00:17:50,547
[grunts]
418
00:17:50,591 --> 00:17:53,246
Our championship match is set.
419
00:17:53,289 --> 00:17:55,248
To no one's surprise,
our returning champions,
420
00:17:55,291 --> 00:17:57,859
the Tamp-Bongs, have made it
all the way into the finals.
421
00:17:57,902 --> 00:17:59,556
But the real story here
is that of their competitor.
422
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:02,211
Coming out
of a 25-year retirement,
423
00:18:02,255 --> 00:18:03,778
Team Brain Damage'd.
424
00:18:03,821 --> 00:18:05,040
At some point, you have to
ask yourself, Jerry,
425
00:18:05,084 --> 00:18:06,433
"Who gives a shit?"
426
00:18:06,476 --> 00:18:08,391
All right, what is going on
with you, Gary?
427
00:18:08,435 --> 00:18:10,654
Susan left me.
She took the kids.
428
00:18:10,698 --> 00:18:13,483
[exhales]
Jesus.
429
00:18:13,527 --> 00:18:15,137
Do I have to stay here
for the rest of this?
430
00:18:15,181 --> 00:18:16,530
Yeah.
431
00:18:16,573 --> 00:18:19,185
♪
432
00:18:19,228 --> 00:18:21,839
Shelly, I would have to be
a real maniac
433
00:18:21,883 --> 00:18:25,147
to have collected
all of the dog shit
434
00:18:25,191 --> 00:18:26,801
from your neighborhood
435
00:18:26,844 --> 00:18:29,934
and pour it right here
on your carpet.
436
00:18:29,978 --> 00:18:31,849
Uh, don't. Don't!
437
00:18:31,893 --> 00:18:34,113
Oh, you did that!
438
00:18:34,156 --> 00:18:35,679
-Oh!
-Oh, look at that.
439
00:18:35,723 --> 00:18:38,117
-Ugh!
-You ready for the magic?
440
00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:39,335
Yeah.
441
00:18:39,379 --> 00:18:41,642
[motor sputters]
442
00:18:43,426 --> 00:18:46,516
[sputtering]
443
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:48,083
Well, that's not good.
444
00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:49,911
Well, hang on now,
hang on.
445
00:18:49,954 --> 00:18:52,261
I could just--
maybe if I just--
446
00:18:52,305 --> 00:18:53,610
-oh, yeah.
-Oh.
447
00:18:53,654 --> 00:18:55,177
-Wh...
-That's just
448
00:18:55,221 --> 00:18:56,526
pushing the shit deeper
449
00:18:56,570 --> 00:18:57,745
into the fibers
of your carpet.
450
00:18:57,788 --> 00:18:59,616
Oh.
[groans]
451
00:18:59,660 --> 00:19:01,488
Now the peanut butter
has mixed.
452
00:19:01,531 --> 00:19:05,448
It looks like a Reese's Pieces,
but a shit version.
453
00:19:05,492 --> 00:19:06,841
Here we are.
It all comes down to this.
454
00:19:06,884 --> 00:19:08,408
One bong to one bong.
455
00:19:08,451 --> 00:19:10,584
What was that name again?
Team Tamp-Bongs?
456
00:19:10,627 --> 00:19:12,673
What, do you shove bongs
up your p-chenks?
457
00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:15,589
Team Brain Damage'd
doing their best
458
00:19:15,632 --> 00:19:16,677
to psych
those girls out.
459
00:19:16,720 --> 00:19:19,201
Shove this,
cheese dick.
460
00:19:19,245 --> 00:19:21,160
[groaning]
461
00:19:21,203 --> 00:19:23,640
-Shit!
-[groans]
462
00:19:23,684 --> 00:19:25,947
Oh, my eye.
I can't see.
463
00:19:25,990 --> 00:19:27,644
If Team Brain Damage'd
doesn't make this shot,
464
00:19:27,688 --> 00:19:29,124
-they're out.
-Like me.
465
00:19:29,168 --> 00:19:31,039
Right out of the condo.
466
00:19:31,082 --> 00:19:32,258
I can't see!
I can't do it!
467
00:19:32,301 --> 00:19:33,563
Yes, yes!
Hey, listen to me!
468
00:19:33,607 --> 00:19:36,871
Yes. Yes, you can.
469
00:19:36,914 --> 00:19:38,351
Okay.
470
00:19:38,394 --> 00:19:40,048
Remember your training.
471
00:19:40,091 --> 00:19:42,833
-"Trust the process."
-Go deep inside.
472
00:19:42,877 --> 00:19:44,661
-Deep inside.
-Come on.
473
00:19:44,705 --> 00:19:47,490
-Okay.
-Shh.
474
00:19:47,534 --> 00:19:50,189
♪
475
00:20:01,591 --> 00:20:03,289
No good!
It's no good!
476
00:20:03,332 --> 00:20:05,595
It's all over.
The Tamp-Bongs have won it.
477
00:20:05,639 --> 00:20:07,554
-Was I close?
-No, not even cl--
478
00:20:07,597 --> 00:20:10,034
oh, take
the blindfold off.
479
00:20:10,078 --> 00:20:12,036
Don't know why you did that.
You couldn't see already.
480
00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:13,473
-Oh.
-You didn't have to
481
00:20:13,516 --> 00:20:15,083
-add another--
-I was trying to use the Force.
482
00:20:15,126 --> 00:20:16,606
I guess I'll go back
to Spencer's Gifts.
483
00:20:16,650 --> 00:20:18,217
I'm sorry
it didn't work out, Weasel.
484
00:20:18,260 --> 00:20:20,262
-It's cool, man.
-Tell him, "Me, too."
485
00:20:20,306 --> 00:20:21,916
You can tell him yourself.
He's right there.
486
00:20:21,959 --> 00:20:24,440
O-oh, I'm sorry
I let you down, Weasel.
487
00:20:24,484 --> 00:20:27,574
But, hey, at least we won
in '87, right?
488
00:20:27,617 --> 00:20:30,316
-What?
-What?
489
00:20:30,359 --> 00:20:31,839
You won
the tournament before?
490
00:20:31,882 --> 00:20:35,277
-Yeah, 1987.
-Oh, that's right, man!
491
00:20:35,321 --> 00:20:36,974
That's totally right!
492
00:20:37,018 --> 00:20:38,237
[chuckles]
493
00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:40,151
Okay, later, 'gator.
494
00:20:40,195 --> 00:20:41,718
Finally done.
495
00:20:41,762 --> 00:20:43,459
You wanna get out of here
and get some food?
496
00:20:43,503 --> 00:20:45,679
I'm just gonna take some pills.
I'll watch you eat.
497
00:20:45,722 --> 00:20:48,290
♪
498
00:20:51,772 --> 00:20:53,687
-Hey, Pac?
-What?
499
00:20:53,730 --> 00:20:56,255
I know you think
this whole thing
500
00:20:56,298 --> 00:20:57,473
was a waste of time,
501
00:20:57,517 --> 00:20:59,562
but I just wanted
to say thanks.
502
00:20:59,606 --> 00:21:02,348
I really needed
something like this.
503
00:21:06,700 --> 00:21:08,136
Oh, oh, hey!
504
00:21:08,179 --> 00:21:10,530
If you ever
need brain surgery,
505
00:21:10,573 --> 00:21:12,096
give me a call.
506
00:21:12,140 --> 00:21:13,402
I will.
507
00:21:13,446 --> 00:21:16,100
And I will.
508
00:21:16,144 --> 00:21:18,494
-Let's get you inside.
-All right.
509
00:21:20,061 --> 00:21:21,323
I don't really think
510
00:21:21,367 --> 00:21:22,933
that's doing much
of anything.
511
00:21:22,977 --> 00:21:24,935
Do you have
a vacuum cleaner?
512
00:21:26,197 --> 00:21:28,548
Are you seriously
asking me that?!
513
00:21:28,591 --> 00:21:30,811
That's about all the time
we have for today's demo.
514
00:21:30,854 --> 00:21:32,291
I hope you've enjoyed
what you've seen
515
00:21:32,334 --> 00:21:34,510
and, uh, if you have
any feedback,
516
00:21:34,554 --> 00:21:35,946
negative or positive,
please fill out
517
00:21:35,990 --> 00:21:37,165
a customer
response survey
518
00:21:37,208 --> 00:21:39,167
at Clypacs.edu.
519
00:21:40,516 --> 00:21:42,301
Dot E-D-U?
520
00:21:42,344 --> 00:21:45,347
♪
521
00:21:45,391 --> 00:21:49,220
Listen, you can hear it
in my chest. Ah-hh-hh...
522
00:21:49,264 --> 00:21:50,874
The first thing
I want everyone to know
523
00:21:50,918 --> 00:21:54,748
is that I'm feeling good
and sharper than ever.
524
00:21:54,791 --> 00:21:58,317
These chairs are way better
than cash, am I right?
525
00:21:58,360 --> 00:22:01,102
Yeah, I was mad
at first,
526
00:22:01,145 --> 00:22:03,322
but I'm not complaining.
It feels great on my shoulder.
527
00:22:03,365 --> 00:22:07,064
I think I overworked it
when I ruined that lady's home.
528
00:22:07,108 --> 00:22:10,372
First off, I am banning eggs
on Tuesdays.
529
00:22:10,416 --> 00:22:14,811
No more eggs from sundown
to sunup on Tuesdays,
530
00:22:14,855 --> 00:22:17,118
unless, of course,
you're left-handed.
531
00:22:17,161 --> 00:22:21,078
This guy is finally starting
to make some sense.
532
00:22:21,122 --> 00:22:23,167
Of course, I'm left-handed,
so I'm biased, but...
36368
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