All language subtitles for 破浪男女
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1
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Action sequences are supervised by professionals.
Do not attempt to re-create to avoid any risks.
2
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泳池的身体
3
00:01:29,917 --> 00:01:32,583
那年刚补满水
4
00:01:32,583 --> 00:01:35,792
等着夏日恋情绽放
5
00:01:45,875 --> 00:01:48,708
当人鱼救起王子时
6
00:01:48,708 --> 00:01:54,750
并不会知道海里的故事这么深 这么冷
7
00:02:06,042 --> 00:02:10,375
他以为是失温的鸡皮疙瘩
8
00:02:10,375 --> 00:02:13,875
靠近才知道是天鹅绒般的花瓣
9
00:02:15,583 --> 00:02:17,042
火辣
10
00:02:31,917 --> 00:02:36,917
原来这就是心动的最初
11
00:02:36,917 --> 00:02:38,542
纯爱的开始
12
00:05:03,958 --> 00:05:06,125
像现在这样半梦半醒的
13
00:05:06,125 --> 00:05:08,250
最舒服了 不是吗
14
00:05:10,042 --> 00:05:12,042
想上岸啦
15
00:05:21,833 --> 00:05:24,125
时间到了吗
16
00:05:24,125 --> 00:05:25,458
还没啊
17
00:05:27,583 --> 00:05:29,500
我把时间延长了
18
00:05:32,625 --> 00:05:34,375
像现在这样半梦半醒的
19
00:05:34,375 --> 00:05:36,042
最舒服了 不是吗
20
00:05:37,375 --> 00:05:39,333
想上岸啦
21
00:05:41,958 --> 00:05:44,250
干 别闹啦
22
00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:57,250
喂
23
00:05:57,875 --> 00:06:00,250
该起床罗 小绿老师
24
00:06:02,833 --> 00:06:05,500
可是我不想上班
25
00:06:06,208 --> 00:06:08,875
但每个礼拜一的早上有朝会耶
26
00:06:08,875 --> 00:06:11,375
不到的话校长会念喔
27
00:06:13,250 --> 00:06:17,667
对啊 长官真的很鸡掰欸
28
00:06:17,667 --> 00:06:20,500
没关系啊 你再睡一下
29
00:06:21,667 --> 00:06:25,833
像现在这样半梦半醒的最舒服了 不是吗
30
00:06:27,583 --> 00:06:29,875
我梦见你在梦里梦到我
31
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:32,458
你怎么知道…
32
00:06:32,458 --> 00:06:35,042
你猜啊 温馨提醒
33
00:06:35,042 --> 00:06:37,333
例会真的会来不及喔
34
00:06:38,667 --> 00:06:40,167
祝你今天顺利
35
00:06:42,708 --> 00:06:46,500
下去…我要上班啦 快点
36
00:06:46,500 --> 00:06:48,125
下去
37
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干
38
00:06:59,958 --> 00:07:02,167
我今天早上梦遗了
39
00:07:02,917 --> 00:07:05,917
蛤 你在说什么
40
00:07:15,833 --> 00:07:18,958
早上醒来整个床都是湿的
41
00:07:20,542 --> 00:07:24,125
妈咧 简直就是
42
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水漫金山寺
43
00:07:29,375 --> 00:07:33,000
我没梦遗过 也没听过哪个女生会梦遗
44
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:34,750
可是我梦遗过啊
45
00:07:34,750 --> 00:07:37,250
不是尿的味道
46
00:07:40,333 --> 00:07:42,958
不好意思 那是什么味道
47
00:07:44,042 --> 00:07:45,542
为什么有百合
48
00:07:45,542 --> 00:07:49,792
百合遇到沉香有一种廉价殡仪馆的味道
49
00:07:49,792 --> 00:07:51,333
蝴蝶兰呢
50
00:07:51,333 --> 00:07:53,833
报告总监 报价太贵
51
00:07:56,167 --> 00:08:00,292
蝴蝶兰的花期比较长 应该会比较划算吧
52
00:08:00,708 --> 00:08:03,667
太太觉得敬佛的花不宜太过艳丽
53
00:08:03,667 --> 00:08:05,333
我折衷两位的意见
54
00:08:05,333 --> 00:08:08,625
没有减少太多兰花 增加一些百合
55
00:08:08,625 --> 00:08:11,333
整体看起来也比较豪华一点
56
00:08:11,333 --> 00:08:15,750
大厅是给客人的第一印象 太太很坚持
57
00:08:15,750 --> 00:08:18,542
嗯 对不起
58
00:08:23,333 --> 00:08:26,625
欸 小绿 该不会你上辈子记忆还在吧
59
00:08:27,792 --> 00:08:31,167
不会吧 都切掉几年了
60
00:08:31,500 --> 00:08:36,458
不过最近的梦好烦喔 很像鬼打墙
61
00:08:36,917 --> 00:08:40,917
一直梦到同样的人 同样的...
62
00:08:41,375 --> 00:08:43,708
你有没有听过
63
00:08:51,500 --> 00:08:56,167
观世音菩萨 -烦欸 不是啦
64
00:08:56,167 --> 00:09:01,208
我说的是登登…
65
00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:03,000
反正就是某个固炮 -没听过
66
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:05,500
每次事后烟在我身上弹的那种旋律
67
00:09:05,500 --> 00:09:08,458
Care? 没救了你
68
00:09:08,458 --> 00:09:10,417
灭火群那个吗
69
00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:12,625
灭火群都是群得来速
70
00:09:12,625 --> 00:09:14,375
裤子脱了就要吸
71
00:09:14,375 --> 00:09:16,375
纯干没有恋爱感我不行
72
00:09:16,375 --> 00:09:18,042
我说的是自由氏
73
00:09:18,042 --> 00:09:20,083
群主自介说自己手指很厉害
74
00:09:20,083 --> 00:09:22,583
练过布袋戏的那个单亲霸
75
00:09:22,583 --> 00:09:24,667
传说中被他爱上的女人
76
00:09:24,667 --> 00:09:28,125
就可以独享马赛海鲜汤的那个
77
00:09:28,125 --> 00:09:29,750
你们到几垒啦
78
00:09:29,750 --> 00:09:32,333
一垒而已啊 就打炮
79
00:09:32,333 --> 00:09:35,167
顶多赛后检讨的时候
80
00:09:35,167 --> 00:09:38,083
一起喝啤酒 吃多多咸水鸡
81
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多多
82
00:09:40,917 --> 00:09:43,500
是不是有手牵手逛夜市啊
83
00:09:43,500 --> 00:09:46,333
白 那都到三垒了好吗
84
00:09:46,333 --> 00:09:49,708
我好好的人鱼公主不当 干嘛上岸当人啊
85
00:09:49,708 --> 00:09:51,333
而且他根本不是菜
86
00:09:51,333 --> 00:09:53,375
你今天不用上班啊
87
00:09:53,375 --> 00:09:54,667
病假啊
88
00:09:55,167 --> 00:09:57,292
昨天医生都警告我说
89
00:09:57,292 --> 00:09:59,208
我快瞎了 叫我不要再用电脑
90
00:09:59,583 --> 00:10:03,708
小绿老师 你现在是不是在追剧
91
00:10:03,708 --> 00:10:05,167
嗯啊 要不然咧
92
00:10:05,167 --> 00:10:09,208
阿公 过门罗 -阿弥陀佛
93
00:10:09,208 --> 00:10:11,500
我找了好多妹妹图来比对
94
00:10:11,500 --> 00:10:12,875
为什么我觉得我的…
95
00:10:12,875 --> 00:10:15,208
你视讯开出来了 -啊干 对不起
96
00:10:15,625 --> 00:10:17,000
阿弥陀佛
97
00:10:18,083 --> 00:10:21,792
欸 我觉得我妹妹形状怪怪的欸
98
00:10:21,792 --> 00:10:24,042
每一朵花本来就不一样啊
99
00:10:24,042 --> 00:10:27,750
哪有 我觉得一定是哪里有问题
100
00:10:27,750 --> 00:10:30,375
所以怎么做 都没有传说中那种...
101
00:10:30,375 --> 00:10:32,875
升天到南天门的感觉
102
00:10:32,875 --> 00:10:37,083
别喔 你去过那里之后就会掉到地狱喔
103
00:10:37,083 --> 00:10:38,125
为什么
104
00:10:48,542 --> 00:10:50,958
总监 新的信封打样来了
105
00:10:50,958 --> 00:10:52,833
请您过目一下
106
00:10:54,167 --> 00:10:57,958
这个logo我记得应该要烫两个不同层次的银
107
00:10:57,958 --> 00:11:01,458
然后这个纸的磅数好像也不太一样了
108
00:11:01,458 --> 00:11:04,458
执行长在预算会议上指示的
109
00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:10,625
报告总监 客人快到了先挑一下衣服吧
110
00:11:10,625 --> 00:11:12,792
你决定吧
111
00:11:12,792 --> 00:11:14,083
选黑的
112
00:11:15,208 --> 00:11:19,125
今天我们鼎海跟DR建设正式联手合作成功
113
00:11:19,125 --> 00:11:21,958
来 大家举杯 -可以上了
114
00:11:21,958 --> 00:11:25,833
谢谢白叔叔 我替我爸爸敬各位
115
00:11:33,875 --> 00:11:38,208
菊理媛 有意思
116
00:11:38,542 --> 00:11:40,292
姊
117
00:11:45,958 --> 00:11:48,250
Matt喜欢喝的是威士忌
118
00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:51,375
报告执行长 我去后面拿麦卡伦
119
00:11:51,375 --> 00:11:54,583
不用了 没有OMAR的话就用不麻烦了
120
00:11:54,583 --> 00:11:55,875
是
121
00:11:58,500 --> 00:12:00,083
欸 Queenie
122
00:12:00,083 --> 00:12:02,750
我怎么看你跟Matt像陌生人哪
123
00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:07,458
以后我们两家可是要长远又深入的合作啊 -对啊
124
00:12:07,458 --> 00:12:10,875
其实我以前在纽约的时候就认识Queenie了
125
00:12:10,875 --> 00:12:12,708
想追她的男生
126
00:12:12,708 --> 00:12:15,458
多到可以组一个篮球队
127
00:12:17,625 --> 00:12:19,458
是棒球队
128
00:12:19,458 --> 00:12:20,708
人比较多
129
00:12:23,208 --> 00:12:25,167
Queenie长那么漂亮
130
00:12:25,167 --> 00:12:27,708
白董 你一定很舍不得吧
131
00:12:27,708 --> 00:12:29,625
其实我这一次回来
132
00:12:29,625 --> 00:12:32,708
已经偷偷的跟Queenie约会了很久
133
00:12:32,708 --> 00:12:35,833
今天这一局呢 就是要顺便告诉爸
134
00:12:35,833 --> 00:12:37,958
姐跟Matt两个的事
135
00:12:38,750 --> 00:12:42,875
Queenie你保守秘密的功夫太到家了
136
00:12:43,458 --> 00:12:45,417
给我自己一个惊喜啊
137
00:12:46,167 --> 00:12:48,750
惊喜
138
00:12:52,125 --> 00:12:56,917
来 这一杯敬我们DR建设还有鼎海
139
00:12:56,917 --> 00:13:02,333
以后我们两大家族要一起打造天堂与人间 干杯
140
00:13:02,333 --> 00:13:05,125
说得太好了 来 干杯
141
00:13:13,667 --> 00:13:15,458
是你女儿不想回去见你的
142
00:13:15,458 --> 00:13:16,792
我们的事跟她无关
143
00:13:16,792 --> 00:13:20,042
我警告你 赡养费你已经拖了半年
144
00:13:20,875 --> 00:13:22,250
布丁
145
00:13:25,875 --> 00:13:27,500
过来吃饭
146
00:13:30,583 --> 00:13:32,083
为什么不理我
147
00:13:41,250 --> 00:13:42,292
喂 Sammy
148
00:13:42,292 --> 00:13:44,042
我之前写给Lucifer的歌
149
00:13:44,042 --> 00:13:47,417
中间的歌词我想改一下 改成
150
00:13:48,042 --> 00:13:49,875
你从我的梦中苏醒
151
00:13:49,875 --> 00:13:51,958
我还贪恋他身躯的湾
152
00:13:51,958 --> 00:13:54,542
海没有岸 床没有框
153
00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:57,208
你这是在写3P吧
154
00:13:57,208 --> 00:14:00,542
我担心跟他的纯爱形象会有落差欸
155
00:14:00,542 --> 00:14:02,417
你考虑一下罗
156
00:14:02,417 --> 00:14:06,083
这句歌词是今天早上我灵光乍现想到的
157
00:14:08,417 --> 00:14:11,375
哪个女生给你这个灵感
158
00:14:11,375 --> 00:14:12,375
你啊
159
00:14:15,958 --> 00:14:19,125
你老婆前两天有打给我
160
00:14:19,125 --> 00:14:22,667
我说你们哪 总是在输赢
161
00:14:24,750 --> 00:14:27,667
这个周末我会去海钓会带一点海鲜回来
162
00:14:27,667 --> 00:14:29,125
你有没有空
163
00:14:29,125 --> 00:14:31,292
周末有约了 抱歉
164
00:14:32,792 --> 00:14:36,375
没关系 你忙 -掰
165
00:14:37,417 --> 00:14:38,958
欸 大家都到齐了吧
166
00:14:38,958 --> 00:14:40,583
到了到了
167
00:14:40,583 --> 00:14:42,958
昨天晚上我有查了一下后台
168
00:14:42,958 --> 00:14:45,333
《外遇》的预告片反应还不错
169
00:14:45,333 --> 00:14:47,250
可是火没有炒起来
170
00:14:47,250 --> 00:14:49,542
不然这样 大家角色互换一下
171
00:14:49,542 --> 00:14:51,417
A组的 "在那编" "在海编"
172
00:14:51,417 --> 00:14:53,500
你们改成用台男的角度去酸异女
173
00:14:53,500 --> 00:14:56,375
那B组 "在天编" 就用女性的角度去骂沙猪
174
00:14:56,375 --> 00:14:57,750
越凶越好
175
00:14:57,750 --> 00:15:00,042
不是啊 我不要反串异男
176
00:15:00,042 --> 00:15:02,125
认真的时候会真的生气
177
00:15:02,125 --> 00:15:03,875
而且我心脏不好刚做支架
178
00:15:03,875 --> 00:15:06,000
你刚做支架不就是要趁这次机会
179
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:09,042
测试一下会不会心脏病复发吗
180
00:15:09,042 --> 00:15:11,042
新的一天
181
00:15:11,042 --> 00:15:14,083
要找新的题材煽风点火 兴风作浪
182
00:15:14,083 --> 00:15:16,583
如果没有别的事情 其他人先下线吧
183
00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:18,875
"在那编" 你留下来
184
00:15:22,625 --> 00:15:24,042
失恋啦
185
00:15:25,458 --> 00:15:29,375
那你失恋去操客人祖宗八代有比较开心吗
186
00:15:29,375 --> 00:15:31,375
要操就去操真人啊
187
00:15:31,375 --> 00:15:33,042
约炮约起来啊
188
00:15:33,042 --> 00:15:34,708
在你失恋的时候去约炮
189
00:15:34,708 --> 00:15:36,500
全世界的人都不会怪你
190
00:15:36,500 --> 00:15:38,750
还会反过来可怜你 同情你
191
00:15:38,750 --> 00:15:40,208
教宗还会赐福你
192
00:15:40,208 --> 00:15:41,958
老天保佑
193
00:15:51,625 --> 00:15:53,208
我长话短说
194
00:15:53,208 --> 00:15:56,167
赡养费我已经信托了 去找律师拿
195
00:15:56,167 --> 00:15:58,708
是你违约在先不让Lorraine回来
196
00:15:58,708 --> 00:16:00,292
而且我要提醒你
197
00:16:00,292 --> 00:16:03,208
歇斯底里的态度会影响小朋友的人格发展
198
00:16:03,208 --> 00:16:06,458
请你检查你的态度
199
00:16:28,875 --> 00:16:31,708
你看 我做的南瓜蛋糕
200
00:16:31,708 --> 00:16:36,875
店长称赞说吃起来有栗子的味道 很特别
201
00:16:36,875 --> 00:16:39,917
你自己亲手做的 这么厉害
202
00:16:39,917 --> 00:16:41,542
那先吃你的
203
00:16:42,750 --> 00:16:44,917
这里禁带外食耶
204
00:16:44,917 --> 00:16:47,667
不可以吗
205
00:16:47,667 --> 00:16:49,208
没关系吧
206
00:16:49,875 --> 00:16:52,792
不好吧 等一下被发现
207
00:16:54,542 --> 00:16:56,625
你是怎么知道我们的
208
00:16:57,292 --> 00:16:59,208
是 "19.5" 先认识你的
209
00:16:59,208 --> 00:17:02,792
我看过你们的所有影片
210
00:17:02,792 --> 00:17:04,708
感觉满厉害
211
00:17:18,500 --> 00:17:21,292
欸 你不觉得很奇怪吗
212
00:17:21,292 --> 00:17:23,792
是什么时候开始流行把发卷戴在头上
213
00:17:23,792 --> 00:17:26,500
然后出门逛街喝咖啡的
214
00:17:26,500 --> 00:17:28,167
我也不懂耶
215
00:17:28,500 --> 00:17:31,125
可能觉得自己很瞎趴吧
216
00:17:31,125 --> 00:17:33,208
其实我觉得满幼稚的
217
00:17:33,208 --> 00:17:35,208
我们班很多人也这样子
218
00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:38,875
喔 你高中生啊
219
00:17:40,750 --> 00:17:44,167
想不到你年纪这么小就喜欢吃综合口味
220
00:17:48,125 --> 00:17:53,083
今天我生日欸 就不能违规一下吗
221
00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:04,125
要不要试看看
222
00:18:04,125 --> 00:18:06,333
我的有没有比较湿
223
00:18:18,458 --> 00:18:20,833
全线预备 开始射击
224
00:18:33,167 --> 00:18:34,667
张家福
225
00:18:34,667 --> 00:18:37,000
听教官说你枪法很准
226
00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:40,375
每一枪都打到要害你想打死嫌犯啊
227
00:18:40,375 --> 00:18:43,583
再不及格你就一直补考 不要休假了
228
00:18:43,583 --> 00:18:45,833
报告长官 我每天都在看监视器
229
00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:48,500
医生说再这样下去我可能会瞎掉
230
00:18:48,500 --> 00:18:50,792
瞎掉还那么准啊
231
00:18:50,792 --> 00:18:53,583
既然那么辛苦那你赶快申请职灾补助啊
232
00:18:53,583 --> 00:18:55,583
早点退一退啊
233
00:18:55,583 --> 00:18:58,708
然后拿到钱喔 可以赶快再去整一整
234
00:18:58,708 --> 00:19:01,125
让你看起来更像真的女人
235
00:19:03,500 --> 00:19:06,833
我本来就是真的 谢谢长官
236
00:19:47,417 --> 00:19:48,958
喂 真的假的
237
00:19:48,958 --> 00:19:50,667
要烙人过去吗
238
00:20:45,542 --> 00:20:48,125
七点半手术房的吗
239
00:22:05,167 --> 00:22:06,250
名字
240
00:22:08,250 --> 00:22:09,833
Bajingan
241
00:22:10,333 --> 00:22:11,833
安全词
242
00:22:12,792 --> 00:22:13,708
掰掰
243
00:22:14,542 --> 00:22:15,875
再一次
244
00:22:18,375 --> 00:22:19,625
掰掰
245
00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:43,667
看清楚
246
00:24:31,417 --> 00:24:32,542
十
247
00:24:43,375 --> 00:24:44,792
九
248
00:24:49,542 --> 00:24:50,708
说啊
249
00:24:55,458 --> 00:24:56,792
八
250
00:24:58,292 --> 00:24:59,875
说你爱我
251
00:25:02,833 --> 00:25:04,250
七
252
00:25:09,667 --> 00:25:11,250
六
253
00:25:17,125 --> 00:25:18,375
五
254
00:25:19,708 --> 00:25:21,708
说你爱我
255
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:28,458
四
256
00:25:35,042 --> 00:25:36,292
三
257
00:25:41,583 --> 00:25:43,375
说你爱我
258
00:25:52,083 --> 00:25:53,458
说你是我的
259
00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:05,958
小绿老师 好不好吃
260
00:26:05,958 --> 00:26:09,625
什么蛋糕啊 这是发粿吧
261
00:26:09,625 --> 00:26:14,500
正确来说应该是南瓜口味的栗子蛋糕
262
00:26:14,500 --> 00:26:17,958
欸... 我排了一个小时的多多咸水鸡请你吃
263
00:26:17,958 --> 00:26:20,333
结果换来这什么 干掉的发粿
264
00:26:20,333 --> 00:26:22,458
人家小女生一片心意嘛
265
00:26:22,458 --> 00:26:24,333
不然房费我来出
266
00:26:25,500 --> 00:26:28,917
不要 订房软件点数要过期了
267
00:26:30,042 --> 00:26:32,167
可是我不会过期啊
268
00:26:33,750 --> 00:26:35,708
蒜味很重欸
269
00:26:39,125 --> 00:26:42,500
蒜头就是Pesto
270
00:26:42,500 --> 00:26:46,917
咸水鸡是南国Pesto佐嫩鸡
271
00:26:46,917 --> 00:26:52,000
哇赛 你味精工厂啊 这么会唬烂
272
00:26:53,083 --> 00:26:54,875
你要懂得观想啊
273
00:26:56,958 --> 00:27:00,583
你脑袋里面想着欧洲 就会在欧洲啊
274
00:27:06,250 --> 00:27:08,292
欸 今天有点奇怪
275
00:27:08,625 --> 00:27:11,042
上次吃脚脚的时候觉得是25.5
276
00:27:11,042 --> 00:27:12,958
今天怎么感觉是26啊
277
00:27:13,375 --> 00:27:14,750
烦捏
278
00:27:22,583 --> 00:27:25,625
小女生搭了两个小时客运你不陪她
279
00:27:26,333 --> 00:27:28,875
人很多 要排队好不好
280
00:27:28,875 --> 00:27:32,250
齁 这么夯
281
00:27:33,333 --> 00:27:34,917
她是 "19.5" 约的啊
282
00:27:34,917 --> 00:27:39,083
而且她后面还安排了一对孪生兄弟井
283
00:27:39,792 --> 00:27:41,333
刺激吧
284
00:27:42,125 --> 00:27:45,625
这么哈扣 然后咧
285
00:27:46,750 --> 00:27:49,042
然后我跟那个小女生
286
00:27:49,042 --> 00:27:51,542
就先在咖啡店里面坐着等
287
00:27:53,167 --> 00:27:58,083
我们两个戴着蓝牙耳机
288
00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:01,000
很小声的
289
00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:02,708
聊色
290
00:28:07,208 --> 00:28:10,083
我们家是家具行
291
00:28:12,500 --> 00:28:15,458
有一次趁大人不在家
292
00:28:17,125 --> 00:28:21,625
我和搬运哥哥在仓库里面
293
00:28:23,750 --> 00:28:26,792
忍不住亲亲抱抱起来
294
00:28:32,708 --> 00:28:34,208
然后呢
295
00:28:36,208 --> 00:28:37,417
然后呢
296
00:28:37,417 --> 00:28:41,750
然后 他的那个前面
297
00:28:41,750 --> 00:28:46,167
有点咸咸 腥腥的
298
00:28:47,292 --> 00:28:49,500
他的头
299
00:28:49,500 --> 00:28:53,625
像绷到不能再硬的气球
300
00:28:54,042 --> 00:28:56,000
好红喔
301
00:29:00,625 --> 00:29:04,625
我跟他就在旋转椅上面做
302
00:29:06,083 --> 00:29:11,208
一次次的在各种不同的椅子上做
303
00:29:11,208 --> 00:29:15,167
味道就都留在那些椅子上
304
00:29:18,875 --> 00:29:23,833
她说暑假的时候
305
00:29:23,833 --> 00:29:26,458
仓库很热
306
00:29:27,083 --> 00:29:32,417
流出来的汗水吹到窗口一点点的风
307
00:29:32,417 --> 00:29:34,625
凉凉的
308
00:29:36,333 --> 00:29:39,625
我在想如果有一天
309
00:29:40,250 --> 00:29:43,417
做爱后蒸发出来的味道
310
00:29:43,917 --> 00:29:47,292
会不会让坐在椅子上面的人
311
00:29:47,292 --> 00:29:49,708
莫名其妙的发情呢
312
00:29:51,083 --> 00:29:53,750
第一次虽然有点痛
313
00:29:55,083 --> 00:29:58,958
可是他的龟头慢慢的滑进来
314
00:29:58,958 --> 00:30:03,042
然后撑开
315
00:30:04,500 --> 00:30:08,750
撑开好像它本来就应该回到那个位置
316
00:30:09,292 --> 00:30:13,833
然后我的下面把它热热的包住
317
00:30:40,292 --> 00:30:42,458
那个来自火星的女孩
318
00:30:43,167 --> 00:30:46,750
看见了干涸多年的游泳池
319
00:30:46,750 --> 00:30:49,208
一直在那里等着
320
00:30:49,958 --> 00:30:53,125
这时候雨季来临
321
00:30:53,125 --> 00:30:55,667
它才从睡梦中醒来
322
00:31:02,792 --> 00:31:05,667
你死人哪 打算继续装聋作哑是不是
323
00:31:05,667 --> 00:31:08,167
遇到事情闷不吭声就是想激怒我嘛
324
00:31:08,167 --> 00:31:10,167
律师马上就会通知你 等着…
325
00:31:21,750 --> 00:31:23,583
干 白
326
00:31:24,167 --> 00:31:26,917
今天早上我又水漫金山寺了
327
00:31:30,500 --> 00:31:33,250
你每次听别人的故事就溃堤
328
00:31:33,250 --> 00:31:37,208
你不是说单亲霸不是菜吗 还约
329
00:31:37,208 --> 00:31:38,917
饭店点数要过期了
330
00:31:38,917 --> 00:31:40,375
是PUA
331
00:31:40,792 --> 00:31:42,500
什么PUA 我怎么可能被PUA
332
00:31:42,500 --> 00:31:44,833
我破麻专业户耶 还不了解
333
00:31:44,833 --> 00:31:46,917
那种ID人设是情伤浪子的
334
00:31:46,917 --> 00:31:49,208
百分百就是要激起圣母情结
335
00:31:49,208 --> 00:31:52,625
你吃了那男孩一整年的牛排 接下来他就要你...
336
00:31:52,625 --> 00:31:54,500
含他一整年的鸡巴
337
00:31:54,500 --> 00:31:57,292
欸 我们群里那个凉圆要上岸了
338
00:31:57,292 --> 00:31:59,375
我在想是什么厉害的角色把她捞起来
339
00:31:59,375 --> 00:32:00,500
结果查了一下
340
00:32:01,042 --> 00:32:02,042
你看
341
00:32:04,958 --> 00:32:06,542
怎么可能
342
00:32:06,542 --> 00:32:10,375
不是 凉圆不是外貌协会吗 这男的是...
343
00:32:11,333 --> 00:32:12,833
天赋异禀吗
344
00:32:13,833 --> 00:32:16,667
凉圆说一切都是缘份派他来的
345
00:32:17,167 --> 00:32:19,458
在她遇到这个男的之前连续几天
346
00:32:19,458 --> 00:32:22,167
她一直做满天都是金鱼游来游去的梦
347
00:32:22,167 --> 00:32:24,375
她去大稻埕找了一个很准的梦婆
348
00:32:24,375 --> 00:32:26,792
那个人就问她说 梦里面会有那种
349
00:32:26,792 --> 00:32:30,708
屁眼上面都是大便 拖着游来游去的那种金鱼
350
00:32:30,708 --> 00:32:34,000
凉圆整个吓烂 想说连这种细节她都知道
351
00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:36,917
然后梦婆就说 你的缘份到了
352
00:32:36,917 --> 00:32:42,042
印表机…你们那个谁啊 不要在那边假会好不好
353
00:32:42,042 --> 00:32:44,375
调了印表机设定就要调回去啊
354
00:32:44,375 --> 00:32:45,458
又不是每个人都会用
355
00:32:45,458 --> 00:32:49,667
队长 这个是要给 -给那个谁
356
00:32:49,875 --> 00:32:54,042
监视器 看一下监视器
357
00:32:54,042 --> 00:32:55,917
那再麻烦学姊了
358
00:32:57,208 --> 00:32:58,833
然后呢…
359
00:32:59,958 --> 00:33:01,792
本来凉圆一见面就想闪人
360
00:33:01,792 --> 00:33:05,250
结果下大雨啊 那个男的就说要送她回家
361
00:33:05,250 --> 00:33:07,875
哪知道雨大到根本连车都开不过去
362
00:33:07,875 --> 00:33:10,750
那男的就背她涉水过街回家了
363
00:33:12,083 --> 00:33:14,125
你梗铺这么长就跟我说这些
364
00:33:15,083 --> 00:33:16,750
没想到一进门
365
00:33:16,750 --> 00:33:19,958
每天便秘的凉圆不知道为什么突然屎意充满
366
00:33:19,958 --> 00:33:21,958
藉口要洗澡就冲进厕所
367
00:33:21,958 --> 00:33:24,417
狂拉猛拉 大拉特拉
368
00:33:24,417 --> 00:33:26,208
我要生气罗
369
00:33:26,208 --> 00:33:29,708
那天淹大水的结果是大楼的屎管整个大倒灌
370
00:33:29,708 --> 00:33:31,792
喷的整个厕所都是
371
00:33:31,792 --> 00:33:34,250
凉圆就一直尖叫 啊天哪 大便
372
00:33:34,250 --> 00:33:36,000
好了啦
373
00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:37,458
那个男的一听到
374
00:33:37,458 --> 00:33:39,375
不顾一切踹开门救出凉圆
375
00:33:39,750 --> 00:33:41,333
Happy ending 来了
376
00:33:42,125 --> 00:33:45,833
那个男的把一切的屎尿都清得干干净净
377
00:33:45,833 --> 00:33:47,458
事后绝口不提
378
00:33:51,833 --> 00:33:55,583
就这样凉圆决定 是他了
379
00:33:55,583 --> 00:33:57,042
全剧终
380
00:33:57,583 --> 00:34:00,833
你说 这不是纯爱吗
381
00:34:01,875 --> 00:34:05,417
白 我们去找那个梦婆好不好
382
00:34:07,708 --> 00:34:10,542
不要 我没有梦
383
00:34:16,833 --> 00:34:18,125
查无此梦
384
00:34:19,583 --> 00:34:22,292
就是我这边找不到你说的那个梦
385
00:34:22,292 --> 00:34:24,333
有可能它根本就不是梦
386
00:34:25,292 --> 00:34:28,000
来这边的人都是因为真假不分
387
00:34:28,000 --> 00:34:30,917
执着在颠倒梦想里
388
00:34:30,917 --> 00:34:35,292
"假作真时真亦假 无为有处有还无"
389
00:34:38,042 --> 00:34:41,000
意思就是你把假的东西当作是真的
390
00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:43,375
那真的东西就会变成假的
391
00:34:44,958 --> 00:34:46,167
啥洨
392
00:34:46,167 --> 00:34:50,583
耐心一点 我们可以把这个世界变成真的
393
00:34:50,583 --> 00:34:52,875
姊姊那你可以先告诉我梦的结局吗
394
00:34:52,875 --> 00:34:55,125
人生哪有快转这件事
395
00:34:55,125 --> 00:34:56,667
至于
396
00:35:11,292 --> 00:35:14,583
为什么你的梦总是同一个
397
00:35:15,167 --> 00:35:18,708
一直重复…
398
00:35:22,125 --> 00:35:25,208
名字 -Bajingan
399
00:35:25,917 --> 00:35:27,417
安全词
400
00:35:30,250 --> 00:35:31,417
掰掰
401
00:35:31,417 --> 00:35:32,833
再一次
402
00:35:37,667 --> 00:35:38,750
掰掰
403
00:37:44,375 --> 00:37:46,167
说你爱我
404
00:37:58,083 --> 00:37:59,708
说你爱我
405
00:38:01,000 --> 00:38:02,917
说啊
406
00:38:21,167 --> 00:38:22,292
说啊
407
00:38:27,208 --> 00:38:28,250
说你爱我
408
00:38:28,250 --> 00:38:29,542
不要啦
409
00:38:29,542 --> 00:38:31,583
我就不要说那个嘛
410
00:38:54,625 --> 00:38:56,208
说你是我的
411
00:38:57,333 --> 00:38:58,625
说你是我的
412
00:39:00,375 --> 00:39:01,875
说你爱我
413
00:39:07,125 --> 00:39:08,333
你还好吗
414
00:39:13,417 --> 00:39:14,375
安全词
415
00:39:15,292 --> 00:39:16,292
安全词
416
00:40:25,375 --> 00:40:27,208
你可以先走没关系
417
00:41:04,750 --> 00:41:06,708
还有十五分钟
418
00:41:28,083 --> 00:41:30,167
慢慢就不痛了
419
00:41:37,958 --> 00:41:41,333
可是有些事情会一直在
420
00:41:42,250 --> 00:41:43,875
不会消失
421
00:42:05,750 --> 00:42:09,250
你温柔的慈悲
422
00:42:09,250 --> 00:42:13,250
让我不知道如何后悔
423
00:42:13,250 --> 00:42:17,375
再也不可能有任何改变
424
00:42:17,375 --> 00:42:20,792
再也愈合不了…
425
00:42:31,958 --> 00:42:35,167
陈为龙 反正你就是个没肩膀的鲁蛇
426
00:42:35,167 --> 00:42:37,208
东西寄过来 运费我出
427
00:42:37,208 --> 00:42:39,000
不要再卢洨了
428
00:42:50,375 --> 00:42:51,542
Neko
429
00:42:52,375 --> 00:42:54,458
你再不回来
430
00:42:54,458 --> 00:42:56,917
我把这些公仔全部都丢掉
431
00:43:02,875 --> 00:43:05,167
你老母不要你了
432
00:43:39,667 --> 00:43:42,625
干 吃我钱
433
00:43:42,625 --> 00:43:46,917
烦耶操你妈 吃我们20块 还我钱啦
434
00:43:56,583 --> 00:44:00,042
喂 张小姐 你机台又吃我们钱啦
435
00:44:00,042 --> 00:44:03,500
吃我20块 快点过来 快点
436
00:44:04,500 --> 00:44:06,833
这边有啦 -这边这边 过来 快点
437
00:44:06,833 --> 00:44:08,583
可以把它摇下来
438
00:44:08,583 --> 00:44:11,125
妈的 滚出来
439
00:44:14,125 --> 00:44:15,542
边一部
440
00:44:17,000 --> 00:44:18,375
边一部
441
00:44:21,500 --> 00:44:22,875
哪一台
442
00:45:03,792 --> 00:45:05,417
我儿子下周回来
443
00:45:05,417 --> 00:45:07,750
我想带他去环岛走一走
444
00:45:12,125 --> 00:45:13,417
这么巧
445
00:45:14,083 --> 00:45:16,250
Lorraine刚好也要回来
446
00:45:16,250 --> 00:45:18,417
要不要我安排一下行程
447
00:45:21,333 --> 00:45:23,875
我们现在这样不是很舒服吗
448
00:45:38,833 --> 00:45:41,375
我最近开始又动笔写小说了
449
00:45:43,875 --> 00:45:46,042
你又再度心动罗
450
00:45:52,750 --> 00:45:55,125
这次是哪个缪思
451
00:45:56,958 --> 00:45:59,625
是个像火星人一样的女生
452
00:46:01,542 --> 00:46:03,417
跟其他人不太一样
453
00:46:11,125 --> 00:46:13,125
那你还来找我
454
00:46:14,583 --> 00:46:17,375
你是我避免迷航的指南针啊
455
00:46:22,542 --> 00:46:25,125
你有给她专属旋律吗
456
00:46:28,750 --> 00:46:31,000
赶快去煮你的马赛鱼汤啊
457
00:46:43,833 --> 00:46:45,458
也不是这个
458
00:46:57,542 --> 00:46:59,375
好像是欸
459
00:47:03,542 --> 00:47:05,042
来吧
460
00:47:22,375 --> 00:47:24,292
不好意思 你有没有怎么样
461
00:47:24,292 --> 00:47:26,958
冲啥洨啊 -你有没有受伤
462
00:47:41,042 --> 00:47:44,500
欸 那个 刚刚拍的可以发限动吗
463
00:47:44,500 --> 00:47:48,500
喔 欸 你刚最后弹的那首是什么啊
464
00:47:48,500 --> 00:47:50,875
你说让你很湿的那一首喔
465
00:48:12,000 --> 00:48:14,958
来我们脚放下去试一下水温
466
00:48:16,958 --> 00:48:20,333
水温可以吗 那先泡一下 谢谢
467
00:48:22,417 --> 00:48:24,750
我的妈那个屄的把你屄的他妈操烂
468
00:48:24,750 --> 00:48:26,333
我操你妈的
469
00:48:26,333 --> 00:48:28,167
今天晚上他妈给我舔屄喔
470
00:48:28,167 --> 00:48:32,000
操你妈 听到没 啊 给我舔屄
471
00:48:33,583 --> 00:48:37,583
你看 我的是不是很硬啊
472
00:48:37,583 --> 00:48:39,542
这样有很猛吗
473
00:48:41,500 --> 00:48:42,750
啥款
474
00:48:42,750 --> 00:48:46,542
你猜 什么是巴西里佐海盐嫩鸡
475
00:48:55,000 --> 00:48:56,625
等一下带过去给你
476
00:49:27,250 --> 00:49:28,625
还在忙吗
477
00:49:30,333 --> 00:49:33,625
我是说多多咸水鸡啦
478
00:49:33,625 --> 00:49:35,625
好想吃多多
479
00:50:03,000 --> 00:50:06,667
(把女生的床弄垮了 哭哭)
480
00:50:17,417 --> 00:50:19,583
小姐可不可以先让我填单啊
481
00:50:21,542 --> 00:50:24,500
这什么意思 没了
482
00:50:24,500 --> 00:50:25,958
全部都没了吗 -没有罗
483
00:50:25,958 --> 00:50:27,833
可是他刚才在点啊 -后面的不用排了没有了
484
00:50:27,833 --> 00:50:30,208
我刚刚等了一个多小时 -没有了 都没有了
485
00:50:30,208 --> 00:50:32,375
那你应该提前跟我们讲 不然我刚才排…
486
00:50:32,375 --> 00:50:35,167
没有了 就已经卖完了
487
00:50:39,708 --> 00:50:42,708
哥哥 没了就没罗
488
00:50:43,833 --> 00:50:46,792
靠 你也让我等太久了吧 你也真是
489
00:50:47,417 --> 00:50:48,708
干嘛
490
00:50:50,125 --> 00:50:52,583
等一下 冷静冷静
491
00:50:52,583 --> 00:50:54,667
违反道上规矩不行喔
492
00:50:55,542 --> 00:50:59,792
有什么关系 规矩就是拿来打破才会爽 走啦
493
00:50:59,792 --> 00:51:02,583
哪有人在外面牵手的啦
494
00:51:03,083 --> 00:51:07,500
肚子很饿耶 我为了你排了一个多小时 快点
495
00:51:18,542 --> 00:51:21,000
欸不要忙了啦 先来吃啦
496
00:51:25,208 --> 00:51:27,750
好吃吗 -不太行
497
00:51:28,500 --> 00:51:32,333
是吗 是因为你没有装在盘子里啦
498
00:51:33,542 --> 00:51:36,375
这样比较有吃饭的样子啊 有没有
499
00:51:37,833 --> 00:51:39,583
这就是好吃的样子
500
00:51:40,625 --> 00:51:43,833
要确定耶 -试试看
501
00:51:47,042 --> 00:51:48,458
怎么样 说实话
502
00:51:50,250 --> 00:51:52,833
嗯 差多多一点
503
00:51:52,833 --> 00:51:54,875
差多多可多了欸
504
00:51:55,500 --> 00:51:57,208
多多就跟我一样是极品
505
00:51:57,208 --> 00:51:59,542
可遇不可求 想吃还吃不到
506
00:51:59,542 --> 00:52:01,833
啊不就刚好我捡到你
507
00:52:03,708 --> 00:52:05,875
我也是顺路来看我的兰花女儿啊
508
00:52:05,875 --> 00:52:08,333
你看你这个后母怎么照顾的
509
00:52:08,333 --> 00:52:09,667
快要烂根了啦
510
00:52:09,667 --> 00:52:13,458
哪有啊 你每次打电话来我都有照着你讲的浇水
511
00:52:15,500 --> 00:52:18,292
你就比较不会照顾自己啊
512
00:52:18,292 --> 00:52:20,583
你看你的床 睡到都垮了
513
00:52:21,333 --> 00:52:23,167
我之前那个专属的蓝色床包呢
514
00:52:23,167 --> 00:52:25,458
你真的很像我爸一直碎碎念
515
00:52:25,458 --> 00:52:27,417
你不要动拜托我自己来啦
516
00:52:28,708 --> 00:52:30,083
小心啦
517
00:52:32,542 --> 00:52:34,000
摊开啊
518
00:52:42,875 --> 00:52:45,250
两个人一起换床单还是太超过了
519
00:52:45,250 --> 00:52:46,292
不要闹啦
520
00:52:47,333 --> 00:52:48,292
干嘛
521
00:52:48,500 --> 00:52:52,875
会让你回想到曾经一起换床单心痛的回忆吗
522
00:52:58,625 --> 00:53:02,125
干 那个小屌男
523
00:53:02,125 --> 00:53:05,750
干嘛 -这是我最喜欢的小说欸
524
00:53:07,917 --> 00:53:10,417
你也喜欢这本纯爱小说喔
525
00:53:10,792 --> 00:53:12,750
"最初的心动"
526
00:53:13,792 --> 00:53:15,292
破掉
527
00:53:17,792 --> 00:53:20,917
这当年在网路上连载超级好看的
528
00:53:21,333 --> 00:53:24,125
真的好想知道他们的后续喔
529
00:53:24,875 --> 00:53:27,750
不知道为什么那个二等文豪不写了
530
00:53:31,792 --> 00:53:34,042
继续写会烂尾吧
531
00:53:37,375 --> 00:53:40,500
主角他们要是认识到最真实的彼此啊
532
00:53:40,500 --> 00:53:42,292
故事就结束了
533
00:53:42,292 --> 00:53:46,292
你说认识彼此 纯爱就不纯爱了
534
00:53:47,458 --> 00:53:50,042
我是说 你口中那个二等文豪啊
535
00:53:50,042 --> 00:53:51,167
有可能啊…
536
00:53:51,167 --> 00:53:53,833
他在现实生活当中只是一个…
537
00:53:53,833 --> 00:53:57,667
会随便乱尬的...烂咖
538
00:54:04,167 --> 00:54:06,500
纯爱还是太逼人了
539
00:54:08,292 --> 00:54:11,625
还是早点认清我自己是个破麻
540
00:54:18,000 --> 00:54:20,667
"人面不知何处去"
541
00:54:25,833 --> 00:54:28,958
干 那什么破脸啊 干嘛
542
00:54:28,958 --> 00:54:31,375
以为自己真的是二等文豪喔
543
00:54:33,667 --> 00:54:34,917
我是啊
544
00:54:50,708 --> 00:54:52,667
是炮友要接也没关系啊
545
00:54:52,667 --> 00:54:55,083
我今天那个来 先去洗澡
546
00:54:56,375 --> 00:54:58,292
你那个来我不介意喔
547
00:54:59,125 --> 00:55:00,833
想要闯红灯喔
548
00:55:00,833 --> 00:55:04,333
万一我真的是警察 小心我开单喔
549
00:55:36,125 --> 00:55:41,167
(Something came up. Fixed the bed
550
00:55:41,167 --> 00:55:44,958
是我自己不想回台湾的 你不用逼妈妈
551
00:55:44,958 --> 00:55:49,625
我不知道你在说什么喔 而且我没逼你妈啊
552
00:55:49,625 --> 00:55:53,875
你手机拿高一点让我看看你 拿高一点
553
00:55:55,125 --> 00:55:57,042
你妈在你旁边啊
554
00:55:59,083 --> 00:56:01,750
那你的意思是我可以不用回台湾罗
555
00:56:01,750 --> 00:56:04,083
那你干嘛叫妈妈找律师
556
00:56:04,083 --> 00:56:07,250
那你跟爸爸说 你为什么不想回来看到我
557
00:56:07,250 --> 00:56:09,083
我长大了 今年不想
558
00:56:09,083 --> 00:56:10,750
请尊重我的意愿 掰
559
00:56:10,750 --> 00:56:13,000
Lorraine别挂 我再跟你说两句
560
00:56:20,833 --> 00:56:25,250
泳池的身体那年刚补满水
561
00:56:25,250 --> 00:56:28,292
等着夏日恋情绽放
562
00:56:29,458 --> 00:56:33,625
他以为是失温的鸡皮疙瘩
563
00:56:33,625 --> 00:56:38,042
靠近才知道是天鹅绒般的花瓣
564
00:56:39,625 --> 00:56:40,917
火辣
565
00:56:44,042 --> 00:56:46,208
我教你接吻
566
00:56:46,208 --> 00:56:48,667
想像那里是她的嘴唇
567
00:57:17,500 --> 00:57:21,917
如果你是女生
568
00:57:21,917 --> 00:57:24,500
我一定会很喜欢你
569
00:57:34,542 --> 00:57:38,167
这个好像还不错喔 -还可以还行
570
00:57:38,417 --> 00:57:41,042
但跟我们家宝贝的气质还差一点
571
00:57:41,042 --> 00:57:43,417
还在找真爱啊
572
00:57:44,167 --> 00:57:46,875
没啊 那你呢
573
00:57:49,917 --> 00:57:52,208
没啊 这些纯炮友而已
574
00:57:56,083 --> 00:58:00,542
就算有真爱 你我都逃不出这一局
575
00:58:01,542 --> 00:58:05,167
你看我们 金童玉女
576
00:58:06,375 --> 00:58:08,875
我赌你先输
577
00:58:11,458 --> 00:58:13,500
这是谁啊
578
00:58:14,667 --> 00:58:19,250
你外婆呀 外婆
579
00:58:23,625 --> 00:58:26,083
陈为龙
580
00:58:26,083 --> 00:58:29,625
我是望你成龙 怎知变成虫
581
00:58:29,625 --> 00:58:32,083
整天玩手机
582
00:58:33,375 --> 00:58:34,917
婆婆
583
00:58:37,375 --> 00:58:41,583
好了好了不要拍了 快点啦快点
584
00:58:43,167 --> 00:58:49,375
小时候你妈当你叉烧不如 要把你丢了
585
00:58:49,375 --> 00:58:53,042
还好是我把你带回来 养这么大
586
00:58:53,042 --> 00:58:55,667
结果还是叉烧不如
587
00:59:07,708 --> 00:59:11,500
陈为龙 妇产科诊所我找好了
588
00:59:11,500 --> 00:59:16,167
下礼拜五 四点半 手术要有人签字陪同
589
00:59:20,125 --> 00:59:24,583
还有后天实战秀是已经答应的工作 一定得去
590
00:59:24,583 --> 00:59:28,417
你要是敢不来的话 我马上把夹娃娃机的押金没收
591
00:59:28,417 --> 00:59:32,000
最后提醒你 我不是你的狗了
592
00:59:42,333 --> 00:59:44,125
嘿 最近好吗
593
00:59:46,167 --> 00:59:49,708
Jason 等下跟你喝
594
00:59:51,250 --> 00:59:52,250
嗨 Matt
595
00:59:52,250 --> 00:59:55,500
嗨 好久不见
596
00:59:58,250 --> 01:00:00,958
气色不错啊 -谢了
597
01:00:06,625 --> 01:00:10,208
我今晚不回家 你开心玩啊
598
01:00:11,208 --> 01:00:12,958
走吧 玩到爽啊
599
01:00:13,875 --> 01:00:15,458
嗨 Matt
600
01:00:15,458 --> 01:00:18,000
恭喜 -谢啦
601
01:00:31,125 --> 01:00:32,500
Neko
602
01:00:34,208 --> 01:00:38,167
对不起 之前的事是我的错
603
01:00:41,000 --> 01:00:43,417
我们今天不要绑 好不好
604
01:00:44,542 --> 01:00:46,708
下一组Neko
605
01:00:50,083 --> 01:00:53,333
上工了 把你的苦瓜脸遮起来
606
01:01:02,542 --> 01:01:13,542
现在让我们来欢迎 Neko和外卖屌
607
01:01:37,042 --> 01:01:40,125
宝宝的事我会负责 回来吧
608
01:01:46,833 --> 01:01:48,792
算我求你了
609
01:01:54,208 --> 01:01:58,583
难道我们就一点点爱都没有吗 一点点爱
610
01:01:59,250 --> 01:02:01,792
打炮什么时候是为了生宝宝啊
611
01:02:02,042 --> 01:02:05,375
干 他妈我有说小孩是你的吗
612
01:02:05,375 --> 01:02:07,375
快点硬起来啦
613
01:02:07,375 --> 01:02:13,000
你就这么想让人看吗 好啊 看啊
614
01:02:18,792 --> 01:02:22,875
对 我就是只外卖屌你想换就换
615
01:02:22,875 --> 01:02:25,250
你在干嘛 -我不玩了行不行
616
01:02:25,250 --> 01:02:27,750
干 疯女人
617
01:02:34,958 --> 01:02:37,917
欸新郎 -过来过来
618
01:02:37,917 --> 01:02:40,542
先生不好意思 总监她还在补妆
619
01:02:40,542 --> 01:02:41,958
是不是再稍等一下
620
01:02:41,958 --> 01:02:43,458
是吗
621
01:02:46,750 --> 01:02:50,792
对不起 你这礼拜有空吗 我们老地方见
622
01:02:52,542 --> 01:02:54,792
来 家属一起复诵
623
01:02:54,792 --> 01:02:57,208
阿嬷过门厅喔…
624
01:02:57,208 --> 01:02:58,917
南无阿弥陀佛
625
01:02:59,792 --> 01:03:04,125
这什么鬼 你们是忍者喔
626
01:03:04,667 --> 01:03:09,083
阿嬷入新厝喔…
627
01:03:09,083 --> 01:03:13,333
天堂欢迎你...还是地狱
628
01:03:20,333 --> 01:03:23,708
好看 -拉一下裙摆 很好
629
01:03:23,708 --> 01:03:29,708
欸 不要忘了笑喔 仙女下凡了
630
01:03:30,875 --> 01:03:34,417
很好ok 裙摆再动一下 -记得笑
631
01:03:36,292 --> 01:03:40,250
记得笑
632
01:03:48,750 --> 01:03:53,125
蔻里安佐海味米浓汤就是海鲜粥加香菜啊
633
01:03:54,833 --> 01:03:57,250
蔻里安就是香菜
634
01:03:57,250 --> 01:04:00,375
这么假掰你也猜得到
635
01:04:00,375 --> 01:04:01,958
算你厉害
636
01:04:01,958 --> 01:04:05,125
报告长官 这位女士要报性侵案
637
01:04:06,792 --> 01:04:08,875
当事人是哪一位
638
01:04:11,625 --> 01:04:13,042
这边请
639
01:04:16,208 --> 01:04:19,083
我女儿一定是被强迫的 -没有
640
01:04:19,083 --> 01:04:21,167
你说什么没有
641
01:04:24,917 --> 01:04:28,125
好…
642
01:04:29,167 --> 01:04:31,583
他们的确有付我外拍费
643
01:04:31,583 --> 01:04:34,708
怎么样 这样有犯法吗
644
01:04:34,708 --> 01:04:40,458
代号 "19.5" "孪生兄弟井" "单亲霸"
645
01:04:40,458 --> 01:04:42,250
总共四个对吗
646
01:04:43,250 --> 01:04:47,958
那你再猜 粥为什么放了两天都不会凉
647
01:04:47,958 --> 01:04:51,667
因为周休二日
648
01:04:53,292 --> 01:04:55,500
也太心有灵犀了吧
649
01:04:55,500 --> 01:05:00,375
有一家超好吃的海产粥 我请你
650
01:05:26,750 --> 01:05:28,833
你到底在哪里
651
01:05:31,708 --> 01:05:34,708
狗奴敢耍主人喔 你完蛋了
652
01:06:18,875 --> 01:06:22,542
没关系 看你要去哪
653
01:06:41,292 --> 01:06:42,667
逆向了
654
01:06:52,792 --> 01:06:57,625
小朋友 小小树苗飞啊飞
655
01:06:57,625 --> 01:07:00,625
小小树苗躲起来
656
01:07:56,125 --> 01:07:59,250
会不会开车啊 单行道耶
657
01:08:02,500 --> 01:08:05,875
踩刹车 方向盘左打
658
01:08:11,250 --> 01:08:12,750
不要慌
659
01:08:20,708 --> 01:08:22,250
油门轻踩
660
01:08:41,708 --> 01:08:44,000
原来你真的是单亲爸喔
661
01:08:44,000 --> 01:08:47,833
我还以为你是味素工厂 讲什么都加料
662
01:08:49,167 --> 01:08:52,000
我是一个劈过腿说过谎的人啊
663
01:08:52,000 --> 01:08:54,042
但我后来学会了说真话
664
01:08:54,042 --> 01:08:56,917
就一切简单了 就不会再痛苦了
665
01:09:02,375 --> 01:09:05,375
猪笼草喔 酷喔
666
01:09:05,708 --> 01:09:09,500
欸 没礼貌 人家是仙履兰 是兰花
667
01:09:09,500 --> 01:09:13,292
干嘛 又生气 -跟她说对不起
668
01:09:15,375 --> 01:09:16,542
我的花
669
01:09:18,708 --> 01:09:20,458
你把她救活罗
670
01:09:20,458 --> 01:09:22,875
我就跟你说不能浇太多水
671
01:09:22,875 --> 01:09:25,042
我不浇水她就活啦
672
01:09:28,500 --> 01:09:32,917
咦 你叫什么名字
673
01:09:34,292 --> 01:09:35,583
布丁
674
01:09:35,583 --> 01:09:38,750
布丁 布丁你好
675
01:09:39,917 --> 01:09:41,917
画面有点感人
676
01:09:41,917 --> 01:09:43,667
它大概有一百年不让我抱了
677
01:09:43,667 --> 01:09:45,875
我不知道喔 我没有勾引它
678
01:09:49,333 --> 01:09:52,375
欸 不嘴炮
679
01:09:52,375 --> 01:09:54,208
我给你一次机会
680
01:09:55,875 --> 01:09:58,333
问我一个问题 我诚实回答
681
01:09:58,333 --> 01:10:00,458
保证不掺味素
682
01:10:00,917 --> 01:10:04,292
一个 神灯不都是三个愿望
683
01:10:06,500 --> 01:10:08,958
贪心 好啊 三个就三个
684
01:10:08,958 --> 01:10:12,042
那你想拿什么秘密来换
685
01:10:19,458 --> 01:10:22,292
跟你介绍一下 这个是…
686
01:10:22,292 --> 01:10:23,625
我知道
687
01:10:24,917 --> 01:10:26,417
你怎么知道
688
01:10:45,333 --> 01:10:48,417
现在餐桌礼仪不是要先拍照吗
689
01:10:49,667 --> 01:10:52,667
可是我吃到传说中的马赛鱼汤
690
01:10:55,375 --> 01:10:58,375
你的不一样
691
01:10:58,375 --> 01:11:00,042
我加了粥
692
01:11:08,792 --> 01:11:10,792
我去洗香香
693
01:11:13,167 --> 01:11:17,542
我想跟你一起洗 -不要 我还要大便
694
01:11:17,542 --> 01:11:19,375
好啦 我们一起洗澡啦
695
01:11:19,375 --> 01:11:22,417
不要 不行 -我想跟你一起洗
696
01:11:26,542 --> 01:11:27,792
喔
697
01:11:29,208 --> 01:11:32,333
你有我一支还不够喔 要那么多支喔
698
01:11:33,375 --> 01:11:34,333
对呀
699
01:11:45,500 --> 01:11:48,375
小绿老师 手机跳提醒耶
700
01:11:50,125 --> 01:11:52,500
明天早上八点要帮学生补考
701
01:11:53,542 --> 01:11:55,958
干 忘记 谢谢
702
01:12:01,833 --> 01:12:03,042
白
703
01:12:04,125 --> 01:12:06,250
原来他说的都是真的
704
01:12:07,250 --> 01:12:10,292
而且我吃到传说中的马赛鱼汤了
705
01:12:13,000 --> 01:12:16,542
他刚还对我生气 超好笑
706
01:12:32,792 --> 01:12:37,708
如果没想去哪的话 就跟我走吧
707
01:12:49,083 --> 01:12:52,417
如果是比较快乐的做爱
708
01:12:52,417 --> 01:12:57,000
生出来的小孩 应该会比较幸福吧
709
01:12:59,583 --> 01:13:05,333
像我就是那种年终周年庆来一炮
710
01:13:05,333 --> 01:13:07,208
跟赠品一样
711
01:13:07,958 --> 01:13:14,375
你才不是 你很特别
712
01:13:14,375 --> 01:13:16,625
好像火星人一样
713
01:13:17,875 --> 01:13:21,792
反而都在问我别的女生不会问的事
714
01:13:24,208 --> 01:13:26,667
其实我只是想知道
715
01:13:26,667 --> 01:13:29,167
到南天门是什么感觉
716
01:13:31,000 --> 01:13:34,125
我好想知道那些人说
717
01:13:34,125 --> 01:13:37,458
干死我吧 干死我
718
01:13:38,792 --> 01:13:41,125
是不是死了以后
719
01:13:41,125 --> 01:13:47,458
隔天醒来就可以变成一个新的好人了
720
01:14:02,750 --> 01:14:04,792
别人都已经走了
721
01:14:06,417 --> 01:14:08,625
我们还在原地想
722
01:14:14,708 --> 01:14:16,875
他为什么这么狠
723
01:14:18,417 --> 01:14:21,542
可是想想 当初自己也狠过啊
724
01:14:24,042 --> 01:14:24,875
因为...
725
01:14:32,750 --> 01:14:35,042
我不想再骗我自己了
726
01:15:42,542 --> 01:15:43,750
姓名
727
01:15:47,625 --> 01:15:49,583
说你爱我
728
01:15:55,042 --> 01:15:56,125
住手
729
01:16:51,333 --> 01:16:53,292
说你爱我
730
01:17:25,667 --> 01:17:26,667
别扯
731
01:17:26,667 --> 01:17:27,750
不行
732
01:17:27,750 --> 01:17:28,958
别扯啊
733
01:17:31,208 --> 01:17:32,125
住手
734
01:18:18,500 --> 01:18:20,458
我再也受不了了
735
01:18:32,958 --> 01:18:34,958
昨天
736
01:18:34,958 --> 01:18:37,292
今天 到永远
737
01:18:52,958 --> 01:18:55,167
你爱我 对吧
738
01:18:58,667 --> 01:19:00,500
说你爱我
739
01:19:06,042 --> 01:19:07,333
爽不爽
740
01:19:07,708 --> 01:19:08,708
不要
741
01:19:12,000 --> 01:19:12,875
说啊
742
01:19:12,875 --> 01:19:13,917
不要
743
01:19:14,333 --> 01:19:16,125
爽要叫啊
744
01:19:16,667 --> 01:19:17,750
说啊
745
01:19:18,583 --> 01:19:19,542
说啊
746
01:19:20,292 --> 01:19:21,083
说啊
747
01:19:22,542 --> 01:19:23,458
停下来
748
01:19:29,917 --> 01:19:31,375
说你爱我
749
01:20:05,250 --> 01:20:10,292
现在是中华民国112年5月11日 上午10点30分
750
01:20:10,292 --> 01:20:12,125
侦讯笔录开始
751
01:20:13,417 --> 01:20:15,792
姓名 出生年月日
752
01:20:17,625 --> 01:20:21,167
陈健元 民国71年7月19
753
01:20:22,250 --> 01:20:27,625
陈健元 你涉及用金钱诱迫未成年少女发生性行为
754
01:20:27,625 --> 01:20:28,833
我们有证据证明
755
01:20:28,833 --> 01:20:32,417
你跟ID代号 "南瓜女孩" 进行性交易
756
01:20:34,208 --> 01:20:38,042
我是有跟她见面 但我们只有聊天
757
01:20:38,042 --> 01:20:42,167
可是所有的嫌疑人跟当事人都指控你耶
758
01:20:42,167 --> 01:20:44,250
说你有参与其中
759
01:20:45,208 --> 01:20:48,667
我当事人只有到车站接送该女并没有参与
760
01:20:48,667 --> 01:20:50,958
请警方协助调阅旅馆监视器
761
01:20:50,958 --> 01:20:53,125
就可以证明我当事人没有参与
762
01:20:53,125 --> 01:20:56,250
所有相关地点的监视器我们都有拍到你
763
01:20:57,292 --> 01:20:59,333
我没有进去那家旅馆
764
01:20:59,333 --> 01:21:01,333
我刚说了 我就只有...
765
01:21:02,167 --> 01:21:03,792
只有怎么样
766
01:21:04,375 --> 01:21:07,667
我就只有...
767
01:21:07,667 --> 01:21:09,375
听她说故事
768
01:21:26,125 --> 01:21:29,917
学姐 你还在修那个未成年性侵案的旅馆硬碟喔
769
01:21:33,000 --> 01:21:34,917
这我之前修过了
770
01:21:35,792 --> 01:21:37,042
没关系
771
01:21:40,125 --> 01:21:42,000
那学姐不好意思 我先走罗
772
01:21:51,208 --> 01:21:54,500
(档案恢复 6/100)
773
01:22:07,500 --> 01:22:09,375
学姐 我先走罗
774
01:22:12,917 --> 01:22:14,792
(档案修复失败)
775
01:22:20,917 --> 01:22:26,792
哈罗 对不起 这么晚吵醒大家起来上工洗地
776
01:22:26,792 --> 01:22:29,083
那个纯爱小王子性爱影片外流的事
777
01:22:29,083 --> 01:22:32,458
谁去查一下 他女朋友什么底
778
01:22:34,083 --> 01:22:35,500
我找到一个赞的耶
779
01:22:35,500 --> 01:22:37,667
他女朋友据说高中还没有毕业
780
01:22:37,667 --> 01:22:39,542
就在林森北做捞妹耶
781
01:22:40,417 --> 01:22:41,792
真假
782
01:22:42,333 --> 01:22:44,958
如果是真的就不要说谎
783
01:22:46,292 --> 01:22:48,958
没有比诚实更重要的事情
784
01:22:50,792 --> 01:22:53,417
是男人就担下来吧
785
01:22:57,500 --> 01:22:59,208
"在天编"
786
01:22:59,208 --> 01:23:03,292
我想 你直接在论坛上写篇抒情文好了
787
01:23:03,292 --> 01:23:10,208
你就写你…
788
01:23:10,208 --> 01:23:11,542
梦见...
789
01:23:14,792 --> 01:23:18,667
当王子在欢场遇到那个女孩的开始
790
01:23:18,667 --> 01:23:21,583
其实就发现他原来是个人鱼
791
01:23:23,292 --> 01:23:25,208
但王子不在意啊
792
01:23:27,583 --> 01:23:28,833
真的吗
793
01:23:32,417 --> 01:23:36,750
爱情故事里都需要纯爱的王子 对吧
794
01:24:55,625 --> 01:24:57,833
硬碟救回来了
795
01:24:57,833 --> 01:25:00,417
其实我不应该跟你泄漏案情
796
01:25:00,417 --> 01:25:03,375
但你的律师晚点就会通知你没事了
797
01:25:06,833 --> 01:25:08,208
太好啦
798
01:25:09,083 --> 01:25:10,500
谢谢你
799
01:25:12,500 --> 01:25:15,208
我现在好想冲过去抱抱你喔
800
01:25:18,750 --> 01:25:20,167
其实我也好高兴喔
801
01:25:20,167 --> 01:25:22,250
原来你就是二等文豪
802
01:25:23,750 --> 01:25:29,500
糟糕 现在我的底细被你摸得一清二楚罗
803
01:25:31,542 --> 01:25:36,958
希望认识彼此不是关系破灭的开始
804
01:25:42,667 --> 01:25:45,250
我想再吃一次鱼汤
805
01:25:45,708 --> 01:25:47,333
当然没问题啊
806
01:25:49,000 --> 01:25:50,792
我找一间好餐厅
807
01:25:52,542 --> 01:25:55,083
去你的秘密花园就行啦
808
01:26:03,208 --> 01:26:04,458
也可以
809
01:26:06,750 --> 01:26:09,750
关于你的事情 我绝对不会告诉别人的
810
01:26:11,583 --> 01:26:13,375
我的什么事
811
01:26:15,292 --> 01:26:19,208
比如说其实你是个警察
812
01:26:19,208 --> 01:26:22,792
然后 又像是一个火星来的人
813
01:26:28,000 --> 01:26:29,833
我是真的不在意
814
01:26:32,250 --> 01:26:35,417
但是我希望你亲口告诉我
815
01:26:41,625 --> 01:26:44,167
"我绝对不会告诉别人的"
816
01:26:46,542 --> 01:26:48,625
"我是真的不在意"
817
01:26:59,125 --> 01:27:01,042
好熟悉喔
818
01:27:03,875 --> 01:27:06,083
好像什么的前奏一样
819
01:27:17,042 --> 01:27:20,833
我是真心的
820
01:27:20,833 --> 01:27:22,542
完全不在意
821
01:27:31,208 --> 01:27:33,500
连干话都说不出来罗
822
01:27:40,667 --> 01:27:42,667
总之我现在是真的
823
01:27:45,375 --> 01:27:47,625
我一直都是真的女人
824
01:27:54,542 --> 01:27:56,333
我的神灯
825
01:27:59,708 --> 01:28:03,083
下礼拜我生日 有趴踢喔
826
01:28:04,208 --> 01:28:06,125
我还有愿望还没许
827
01:28:07,500 --> 01:28:09,125
通告再发给你
828
01:28:26,625 --> 01:28:29,292
我在老地方等你
829
01:28:29,292 --> 01:28:31,125
我给你两倍的钱 三倍的钱
830
01:28:31,125 --> 01:28:34,250
拜托你来 拜托
831
01:28:48,583 --> 01:28:55,000
Neko 宝宝的事我们一起来想办法好不好
832
01:28:57,583 --> 01:29:02,167
一起 你先想好什么叫做在一起吧
833
01:29:28,583 --> 01:29:31,000
你在跟我开玩笑吗 -
那我刚刚打给你怎么不接
834
01:29:31,000 --> 01:29:32,458
你现在给我立刻去机场接Lorraine
835
01:29:32,458 --> 01:29:35,375
你有没有搞错 Lorraine她才几岁
836
01:29:35,375 --> 01:29:36,917
你怎么会让她一个人搭飞机回来啊
837
01:29:36,917 --> 01:29:39,833
她就是瞒着我买的 你现在立刻马上去机…
838
01:29:46,083 --> 01:29:50,208
嘿Lorraine 你到了吗 你先不要乱跑
839
01:29:50,208 --> 01:29:53,250
你跟爸爸说你在哪里 我过去接你
840
01:29:53,667 --> 01:29:57,083
谢谢 我自己会搭车回家 我有钥匙
841
01:29:58,125 --> 01:30:01,917
好啊…还是你...你这几天
842
01:30:01,917 --> 01:30:05,000
喔 这几天有没有想要去哪里玩
843
01:30:05,000 --> 01:30:06,250
爸爸陪你出去玩好不好
844
01:30:06,250 --> 01:30:08,792
协议里面只有说我得回台湾吧
845
01:30:08,792 --> 01:30:10,875
没有说我要陪你度假
846
01:30:10,875 --> 01:30:14,875
我回来了就不要再逼妈妈了 把钱给她
847
01:30:16,208 --> 01:30:19,042
Lorraine 你注意一下你的态度
848
01:30:19,042 --> 01:30:20,333
你可以表达你的情绪
849
01:30:20,333 --> 01:30:22,333
但不表示你可以这样跟我说话
850
01:30:22,333 --> 01:30:25,750
麻烦检查一下你这句话的逻辑好吗
851
01:30:27,333 --> 01:30:29,042
你知道爸爸很爱你
852
01:30:29,042 --> 01:30:31,167
你把那句爱你对你手机里那些女生说
853
01:30:31,167 --> 01:30:33,042
看她们谁会信
854
01:30:52,667 --> 01:30:54,625
希望世界和平
855
01:30:55,125 --> 01:30:57,792
希望我今天可以
856
01:30:57,792 --> 01:30:59,750
一步登天
857
01:31:03,958 --> 01:31:05,417
南天门的天啊
858
01:31:09,042 --> 01:31:10,750
我要你
859
01:31:10,750 --> 01:31:12,417
干他
860
01:31:23,542 --> 01:31:25,708
警察姐姐的话要听喔
861
01:31:50,125 --> 01:31:53,500
如果这一切都搞得像输赢
862
01:31:53,500 --> 01:31:55,708
这样好可惜喔
863
01:35:21,250 --> 01:35:22,875
告诉我
864
01:35:22,875 --> 01:35:27,792
你在我身上弹的是什么歌
865
01:35:29,500 --> 01:35:31,333
我不要告诉你
866
01:35:32,083 --> 01:35:35,500
告诉你故事就结束了
867
01:36:02,208 --> 01:36:03,875
干死我
868
01:36:04,667 --> 01:36:06,333
干死我吧
869
01:36:07,667 --> 01:36:12,083
我也想变成一个好人 我也想
870
01:38:11,208 --> 01:38:14,917
心 跳漏了一拍
871
01:38:16,917 --> 01:38:20,083
原来那就是心动的最初
872
01:38:20,708 --> 01:38:22,583
纯爱的开始
873
01:38:32,208 --> 01:38:36,708
火星人在离开地球的漫长寒冷旅程中
874
01:38:37,583 --> 01:38:41,667
回忆着电光火石的瞬间取暖
875
01:38:42,583 --> 01:38:45,000
后来想起
876
01:38:45,000 --> 01:38:50,167
居然还有一点 火辣
877
01:39:12,333 --> 01:39:13,708
上岸啦
878
01:39:19,125 --> 01:39:21,083
什么时候再见面
59612