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1
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[ Groaning ]
2
00:00:32,399 --> 00:00:33,866
[ Groaning Stops ]
3
00:00:33,966 --> 00:00:36,170
[ Beeping ]
4
00:00:36,204 --> 00:00:37,771
[ Beep Flatlines ]
5
00:00:39,207 --> 00:00:41,741
NOTIFY HIS SURVIVORS.
6
00:00:44,545 --> 00:00:46,179
* B-E-N-D-E-R
7
00:00:46,213 --> 00:00:48,249
* BENDER!
8
00:00:48,348 --> 00:00:49,783
* B-E-N-D-E-R
9
00:00:49,883 --> 00:00:51,451
* BENDER!
10
00:00:51,484 --> 00:00:53,087
* SAYING B...
11
00:00:53,186 --> 00:00:55,256
* E-N...
12
00:00:55,356 --> 00:00:57,524
* DER!
13
00:00:57,557 --> 00:00:58,658
[ Beeps ]
14
00:00:58,759 --> 00:01:00,060
[ Singing Stops ]
15
00:01:00,161 --> 00:01:01,329
MAIL CALL!
16
00:01:01,429 --> 00:01:04,531
AMY, HERE'S YOUR
DESIGNER LINGERIE CATALOG
17
00:01:04,564 --> 00:01:07,234
FRY, SADIE'S BRA PARADE
18
00:01:07,334 --> 00:01:09,469
AND, LEELA, BULK
UNDERPANTS OUTLET.
19
00:01:09,503 --> 00:01:11,037
YOU BUY ONE POUND
OF UNDERWEAR
20
00:01:11,070 --> 00:01:12,673
AND YOU'RE ON
THEIR LIST FOREVER.
21
00:01:12,772 --> 00:01:16,777
AND FOR BENDER-- UH-OH--
A BLACK-BORDERED ENVELOPE.
22
00:01:16,876 --> 00:01:19,313
OH, NO.
SOMEONE YOU KNOW MUST'VE DIED.
23
00:01:19,347 --> 00:01:20,248
[ Beeps ]
24
00:01:20,347 --> 00:01:21,948
I HOPE IT WAS ONE OF MY ENEMIES.
25
00:01:22,049 --> 00:01:24,185
THOSE GUYS SUCK.
26
00:01:24,284 --> 00:01:25,319
[ Gasps ]
27
00:01:25,353 --> 00:01:27,954
OH, NO!
MY UNCLE VLADIMIR.
28
00:01:28,055 --> 00:01:29,456
OH, I'M SORRY, BENDER.
29
00:01:29,557 --> 00:01:30,591
WHEN'S THE FUNERAL?
30
00:01:30,691 --> 00:01:32,793
TOMORROW AT THE FAMILY CASTLE.
31
00:01:32,825 --> 00:01:34,828
FOLLOWED BY
THE READING OF HIS WILL.
32
00:01:34,927 --> 00:01:36,764
WELL, I'M RICH.
33
00:01:36,864 --> 00:01:40,668
GOOD-BYE, LOSERS
WHOM I'VE ALWAYS HATED.
34
00:01:40,700 --> 00:01:42,034
COME ON. IT'LL BE FUN.
35
00:01:42,135 --> 00:01:44,003
[ Thunder Crashing ]
36
00:01:55,615 --> 00:01:58,485
AH, PARDON ME,
MY GOOD SIMPLETON
37
00:01:58,519 --> 00:02:01,221
COULD YOU TAKE US
TO YON CASTLE?
38
00:02:02,355 --> 00:02:04,292
CASTLE?
[ Mumbling ]
39
00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:08,728
SOME SAY UNHOLY THINGS
HAPPEN UP THERE.
40
00:02:08,829 --> 00:02:11,399
FOR EXAMPLE,
ALL OF US SAY THAT.
41
00:02:11,498 --> 00:02:12,865
[ Grunts Dismissively ]
42
00:02:12,900 --> 00:02:14,835
SUPERSTITIOUS
ROBOT MUMBO JUMBO.
43
00:02:14,867 --> 00:02:18,838
MUMBO, PERHAPS;
JUMBO, PERHAPS NOT.
44
00:02:18,938 --> 00:02:20,674
WITH ALL YOUR
MODERN SCIENCE
45
00:02:20,707 --> 00:02:22,975
ARE YOU ANY CLOSER
TO UNDERSTANDING
46
00:02:23,009 --> 00:02:25,746
THE MYSTERY OF HOW
A ROBOT WALKS OR TALKS?
47
00:02:25,846 --> 00:02:27,247
YES, YOU IDIOT.
48
00:02:27,348 --> 00:02:28,681
THE CIRCUIT DIAGRAM IS
49
00:02:28,716 --> 00:02:31,352
RIGHT HERE ON THE INSIDE
OF YOUR CASE.
50
00:02:31,384 --> 00:02:32,819
I CHOOSE TO BELIEVE
51
00:02:32,853 --> 00:02:35,588
WHAT I WAS PROGRAMMED
TO BELIEVE.
52
00:02:35,688 --> 00:02:37,358
[ Horses Neighing ]
53
00:02:42,263 --> 00:02:44,764
I WILL GO THIS FAR
AND NO FURTHER.
54
00:02:48,701 --> 00:02:52,004
AND, SO, WE COMMEND
VLADIMIR'S REMAINS TO THE EARTH.
55
00:02:52,038 --> 00:02:56,210
FILINGS TO FILINGS,
RUST TO RUST.
56
00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:07,721
[ Sobs ]
57
00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:15,429
[ Man ]
TO MY LOYAL BUTLER
58
00:03:15,528 --> 00:03:18,198
"YOU THERE," FOR
HIS DECADES OF SERVICE
59
00:03:18,231 --> 00:03:19,533
I LEAVE A PITTANCE
60
00:03:19,633 --> 00:03:22,370
TO BE PAID
IN 20 EQUAL INSTALLMENTS
61
00:03:22,402 --> 00:03:24,771
OF 1/20th OF A PITTANCE EACH.
62
00:03:24,872 --> 00:03:26,706
[ Sobbing ]
63
00:03:26,740 --> 00:03:28,876
TO MY LAZY,
SPOILED SON TANDY
64
00:03:28,975 --> 00:03:31,778
WHO NEVER LEARNED
THE VALUE OF A DOLLAR
65
00:03:31,978 --> 00:03:35,215
I LEAVE MY ENTIRE
$10 MILLION FORTUNE.
66
00:03:35,248 --> 00:03:36,616
[ Whispering ]
IS THAT A LOT?
67
00:03:36,650 --> 00:03:38,618
AND TO MY
LOVING NEPHEW BENDER
68
00:03:38,651 --> 00:03:41,421
ASSUMING HE'S NOT RESPONSIBLE
FOR MY DEATH
69
00:03:41,521 --> 00:03:42,956
I LEAVE MY CASTLE...
70
00:03:42,990 --> 00:03:44,957
YES!
LET'S STAY THERE TONIGHT.
71
00:03:44,991 --> 00:03:47,961
ON CONDITION THAT HE SPEND
ONE NIGHT WITHIN ITS WALLS.
72
00:03:47,995 --> 00:03:51,198
OH, MAN, THERE'S ALWAYS A CATCH!
73
00:03:51,230 --> 00:03:53,366
[ Screeching ]
74
00:03:53,401 --> 00:03:54,701
[ Squishy Thud ]
75
00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:56,069
[ Thud ]
76
00:03:56,168 --> 00:03:58,472
[ Slurps And Sighs ]
77
00:03:58,506 --> 00:04:01,140
I GET A GOOD VIBE
FROM THIS PLACE--
78
00:04:01,174 --> 00:04:02,810
NICE, LONG, DINNER TABLE
79
00:04:02,842 --> 00:04:04,912
QUIET, WELL-BEHAVED SPIDERS...
80
00:04:05,012 --> 00:04:06,713
GRAVEYARD ADJACENT.
81
00:04:06,747 --> 00:04:07,948
YEP, IT'S GOING TO BE...
82
00:04:08,048 --> 00:04:09,049
[ Gasps ]
83
00:04:09,081 --> 00:04:09,717
WHAT IS IT?
84
00:04:09,750 --> 00:04:10,850
THAT PAINTING.
85
00:04:10,950 --> 00:04:12,520
THE EYES ARE WATCHING ME.
86
00:04:12,620 --> 00:04:13,920
HMM.
87
00:04:14,021 --> 00:04:18,559
IT HAS MOTOR EYE SENSORS
ATTACHED TO MOTION DETECTORS.
88
00:04:18,591 --> 00:04:19,793
SO DOES MY BUTT
89
00:04:19,826 --> 00:04:22,161
BUT I DON'T FRAME IT
AND PUT IT ON THE WALL.
90
00:04:22,194 --> 00:04:23,497
ALTHOUGH...
91
00:04:23,531 --> 00:04:25,432
[ Spooky Organ Glissando ]
92
00:04:25,533 --> 00:04:27,266
[ Man Laughing Ominously ]
93
00:04:27,367 --> 00:04:28,435
WHAT'S THAT?
94
00:04:28,536 --> 00:04:30,437
I DON'T KNOW,
BUT IT'S INFECTIOUS.
95
00:04:30,538 --> 00:04:33,540
[ Laughing ]
96
00:04:33,641 --> 00:04:35,343
[ Thunder Crashing ]
97
00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:37,478
[ Teeth Chattering ]
98
00:04:37,511 --> 00:04:40,047
NO DOUBT ABOUT IT,
THIS PLACE IS HAUNTED.
99
00:04:40,146 --> 00:04:41,514
DON'T BE SILLY, MON.
100
00:04:41,548 --> 00:04:44,384
THE LAST GHOST DIED
OVER 200 YEARS AGO.
101
00:04:44,485 --> 00:04:47,654
THE LAST HUMAN GHOST,
BUT ROBOT GHOSTS...
102
00:04:47,687 --> 00:04:49,021
[ Shudders ]
103
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:50,858
[ Spooky Organ Glissando ]
104
00:04:50,891 --> 00:04:52,625
[ Gasps ]
105
00:04:52,725 --> 00:04:56,963
0-1-0-1-1-0-0-1-0-1.
106
00:04:57,064 --> 00:04:58,230
WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
107
00:04:58,331 --> 00:04:59,132
IT'S JUST GIBBERISH.
108
00:04:59,165 --> 00:05:00,199
[ Gasps ]
109
00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:03,836
1-0-1-0-0-1-1-0-1-0?!
110
00:05:03,870 --> 00:05:04,904
[ Screams ]
111
00:05:11,077 --> 00:05:12,879
UNCLE VLADIMIR!
112
00:05:12,980 --> 00:05:14,481
COME, BENDER.
113
00:05:14,514 --> 00:05:16,817
YOU'LL LIKE BEING DEAD.
114
00:05:16,850 --> 00:05:19,086
THAT'S WHAT THEY SAID
ABOUT BEING ALIVE.
115
00:05:19,185 --> 00:05:21,088
[ Moaning ]
116
00:05:21,187 --> 00:05:22,723
JOIN US.
JOIN US.
117
00:05:22,822 --> 00:05:24,925
JOIN US, BENDER.
118
00:05:25,024 --> 00:05:25,992
OH, OH, MY GOD!
119
00:05:26,026 --> 00:05:28,862
[ Stammering ]
120
00:05:28,961 --> 00:05:30,730
[ Screaming ]
121
00:05:30,831 --> 00:05:32,566
[ Crying ]
122
00:05:37,870 --> 00:05:39,105
[ Sizzles ]
123
00:05:39,206 --> 00:05:40,707
JUST AS I SUSPECTED.
124
00:05:40,740 --> 00:05:44,512
THESE ROBOTS WERE BURIED
IN IMPROPERLY SHIELDED COFFINS.
125
00:05:44,545 --> 00:05:47,047
THEIR PROGRAMMING LEAKED
INTO THE CASTLE'S WIRING
126
00:05:47,146 --> 00:05:48,981
THROUGH THIS OLD ABANDONED MODEM
127
00:05:49,016 --> 00:05:52,218
ALLOWING THEM TO PROJECT
THEMSELVES AS HOLOGRAMS.
128
00:05:52,319 --> 00:05:53,185
OF COURSE!
129
00:05:53,220 --> 00:05:54,654
IT WAS SO OBVIOUS.
130
00:05:54,687 --> 00:05:57,990
YES, THAT SEQUENCE OF WORDS
I SAID MADE PERFECT SENSE.
131
00:05:58,024 --> 00:05:59,358
WE REALLY SHOULD TELL BENDER
132
00:05:59,393 --> 00:06:01,428
THERE'S NOTHING
TO BE AFRAID OF.
133
00:06:01,528 --> 00:06:04,363
[ Screaming ]
134
00:06:08,735 --> 00:06:10,202
[ Panting ]
135
00:06:10,237 --> 00:06:11,471
HUH?
136
00:06:15,442 --> 00:06:17,043
[ Gasps ]
137
00:06:18,978 --> 00:06:20,713
NO!
138
00:06:25,285 --> 00:06:29,689
[ Howling ]
139
00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:30,723
HONK! HONK!
140
00:06:34,827 --> 00:06:36,062
BENDER, WAKE UP.
141
00:06:36,163 --> 00:06:37,064
[ Moans ]
142
00:06:37,163 --> 00:06:38,298
OH...
143
00:06:38,331 --> 00:06:40,968
HE'S OKAY. QUICK,
DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY LIQUOR?
144
00:06:43,471 --> 00:06:44,771
BENDER, WHAT HAPPENED?
145
00:06:44,872 --> 00:06:47,139
SOMEBODY TRIED TO RUN ME OVER
146
00:06:47,173 --> 00:06:49,042
AND NOT WITH A NORMAL HOVER CAR.
147
00:06:49,076 --> 00:06:51,944
IT CREPT ALONG THE GROUND
ON ROUND RUBBER FEET
148
00:06:52,045 --> 00:06:53,079
LIKE A WOLF.
149
00:06:53,180 --> 00:06:55,649
POOR BENDER,
YOU'RE SEEING THINGS.
150
00:06:55,682 --> 00:06:57,584
YOU'VE BEEN DRINKING
TOO MUCH, OR TOO LITTLE.
151
00:06:57,685 --> 00:06:59,019
I FORGET HOW IT
WORKS WITH YOU.
152
00:06:59,119 --> 00:07:02,021
ANYWAY, YOU HAVEN'T DRUNK
EXACTLY THE RIGHT AMOUNT.
153
00:07:02,122 --> 00:07:03,223
MAYBE HE HAS.
154
00:07:03,255 --> 00:07:04,524
LOOK AT THESE TRACKS.
155
00:07:04,625 --> 00:07:05,658
[ Screams ]
156
00:07:05,692 --> 00:07:07,995
I THINK BENDER MAY
BE TELLING THE TRUTH.
157
00:07:08,028 --> 00:07:09,497
[ All Scream ]
158
00:07:17,870 --> 00:07:18,971
[ Groans ]
159
00:07:19,005 --> 00:07:20,439
[ Moaning ]
160
00:07:20,540 --> 00:07:22,175
BENDER, YOU LOOK AWFUL.
161
00:07:22,209 --> 00:07:24,677
I PRESCRIBE MAKEUP.
162
00:07:24,711 --> 00:07:28,380
HERE. IT JUST SO HAPPENS
I HAVE MY MARY KAY SAMPLE CASE.
163
00:07:28,481 --> 00:07:30,149
AH, I JUST NEED SLEEP.
164
00:07:30,182 --> 00:07:33,721
I HAD NIGHTMARES ALL NIGHT
ABOUT CARS RUNNING PEOPLE OVER.
165
00:07:33,821 --> 00:07:36,456
MANY PEOPLE DREAM
OF A FRESH NEW LOOK
166
00:07:36,557 --> 00:07:39,959
AND MARY KAY CAN MAKE
THOSE DREAMS COME TRUE.
167
00:07:40,060 --> 00:07:42,730
LOOK AT THIS! THEY FOUND
THOSE SAME RUBBERY TRACKS
168
00:07:42,829 --> 00:07:44,463
RIGHT HERE IN NEW NEW YORK.
169
00:07:44,497 --> 00:07:46,899
THERE WAS A HIT-AND-RUN BY
THE ROBOT PORNO THEATER.
170
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:47,668
[ Gasps ]
171
00:07:47,701 --> 00:07:48,836
ROBOT PORNO THEATER?
172
00:07:48,935 --> 00:07:52,471
I WAS IN THAT...
GENERAL AREA LAST NIGHT.
173
00:07:52,505 --> 00:07:54,406
WHOEVER RAN ME DOWN
OUT ON THE MOORS
174
00:07:54,507 --> 00:07:56,576
MUST'VE FOLLOWED ME BACK HERE.
175
00:07:56,677 --> 00:07:59,346
BENDER, MON, NO ONE'S
TRYING TO RUN YOU OVER.
176
00:07:59,446 --> 00:08:01,514
STOP BEING A BIG
HALLUCINATING BABY.
177
00:08:01,615 --> 00:08:02,314
YEAH?
178
00:08:02,348 --> 00:08:03,315
WELL, COULD A BIG
179
00:08:03,350 --> 00:08:05,017
HALLUCINATING
BABY DO THIS?
180
00:08:05,117 --> 00:08:08,321
[ Crying ]
181
00:08:08,355 --> 00:08:10,057
I'M SCARED.
182
00:08:16,495 --> 00:08:18,398
[ Tires Squealing ]
183
00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:29,341
[ Laughing ]
184
00:08:29,375 --> 00:08:31,310
I DON'T KNOW
WHICH I LIKE MORE
185
00:08:31,343 --> 00:08:34,014
SMASHING CARS
OR SMASHING FACES.
186
00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:36,515
WELL, LUCKY YOU DON'T
GOT TO DECIDE TONIGHT.
187
00:08:36,616 --> 00:08:38,485
NOW, COME ON, WE GOT
CHURCH TOMORROW.
188
00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:41,855
[ Engine Chugging Softly ]
189
00:08:46,025 --> 00:08:47,595
[ Clanks ]
190
00:08:47,695 --> 00:08:48,596
[ Engine Revs ]
191
00:08:48,696 --> 00:08:50,397
DID YOU HEAR SOMETHING?
192
00:08:50,496 --> 00:08:53,399
NAH, IT WAS PROBABLY
JUST A GOLDEN MARMOSET.
193
00:08:53,500 --> 00:08:55,368
[ Engine Revs ]
194
00:08:55,402 --> 00:08:57,269
THAT DON'T SOUND LIKE
195
00:08:57,370 --> 00:09:00,273
NO GOLDEN MARMOSET
I EVER HEARD.
196
00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:02,909
[ Whimpering ]
197
00:09:03,009 --> 00:09:05,913
[ Panting ]
198
00:09:06,013 --> 00:09:06,913
AAH!
WHOO!
199
00:09:06,947 --> 00:09:08,248
MADE IT.
200
00:09:08,347 --> 00:09:10,884
SO, ANYWAY, UH,
WHAT ARE YOU
WEARING TOMORROW?
201
00:09:10,984 --> 00:09:11,951
[ Screaming ]
202
00:09:12,885 --> 00:09:16,056
[ Car ]
HONK, HONK, HONK!
203
00:09:16,155 --> 00:09:17,825
[ Howling ]
204
00:09:24,163 --> 00:09:25,865
[ Moaning ]
205
00:09:25,899 --> 00:09:27,967
WHAT THE...?
206
00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:29,501
TRANSMISSION FLUID?
207
00:09:29,602 --> 00:09:30,738
WHERE HAVE I BEEN?
208
00:09:30,837 --> 00:09:31,871
WHAT HAPPENED?
209
00:09:31,904 --> 00:09:32,905
[ Grunts ]
210
00:09:33,005 --> 00:09:35,241
GETS OUT OF HERE,
YOUSE LOUSY BUM.
211
00:09:35,341 --> 00:09:37,409
PLEASE, I'M SCARED.
212
00:09:37,509 --> 00:09:38,510
WE'RE ALL SCARED.
213
00:09:38,611 --> 00:09:39,913
IT'S THE HUMAN CONDITION.
214
00:09:40,013 --> 00:09:42,581
WHY DO YOU THINKS I PUT
ON THIS TOUGH-GUY FACADE?
215
00:09:42,682 --> 00:09:43,850
NOW, BEAT IT!
216
00:09:43,951 --> 00:09:46,253
[ Bender ]
I PASSED OUT AROUND MIDNIGHT
217
00:09:46,352 --> 00:09:48,455
WHICH IS MUCH EARLIER
THAN USUAL
218
00:09:48,488 --> 00:09:49,690
AND WHEN I WOKE UP
219
00:09:49,789 --> 00:09:51,991
I FOUND THESE
IN MY CHEST CABINET.
220
00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:53,360
AW, RELAX, BUDDY.
221
00:09:53,460 --> 00:09:55,796
YOU WERE PROBABLY JUST SHOOTING
SOME BIG, FUZZY CRAPS.
222
00:09:55,828 --> 00:09:56,797
NO!
223
00:09:56,830 --> 00:09:58,530
I THINK
I MAY HAVE HURT SOMEONE.
224
00:09:58,631 --> 00:10:01,634
OH, LORD, I'M ON THE VERGE
OF A NERVOUS MELTDOWN.
225
00:10:03,370 --> 00:10:05,038
GEEZ, BENDER,
YOU'RE SCARING ME.
226
00:10:05,138 --> 00:10:06,306
YOU'RE GOING WACKO.
227
00:10:06,339 --> 00:10:07,307
YOU'RE RIGHT.
228
00:10:07,340 --> 00:10:08,975
I NEED PROFESSIONAL HELP
229
00:10:09,009 --> 00:10:10,476
AND DAMN THE EXPENSE.
230
00:10:10,509 --> 00:10:11,812
[ Crickets Chirping ]
231
00:10:11,845 --> 00:10:13,480
DAMN THE EXPENSE!
232
00:10:15,282 --> 00:10:18,051
MY FRIEND, YOU HAVE
NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT...
233
00:10:18,150 --> 00:10:22,022
EXCEPT A NIGHTMARISH LIFE
OF UNREMITTING HORROR.
234
00:10:22,054 --> 00:10:23,123
PHEW.
235
00:10:23,222 --> 00:10:26,192
FOR, YOU SEE,
YOU ARE A WERE-CAR.
236
00:10:26,225 --> 00:10:28,195
[ Both Gasping ]
A WERE-CAR?
237
00:10:28,227 --> 00:10:30,363
THE CAR THAT RAN YOU DOWN
ON THE MOORS
238
00:10:30,397 --> 00:10:31,831
WAS ALSO A WERE-CAR.
239
00:10:31,932 --> 00:10:35,001
IT BEAMED THE VIRUS TO YOU
THROUGH ITS DEMONIC HEADLIGHTS.
240
00:10:35,101 --> 00:10:36,168
THAT'S CRAZY.
241
00:10:36,269 --> 00:10:39,538
YES. SO CRAZY
THAT IT MUST BE TRUE.
242
00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:42,575
EACH MIDNIGHT,
WHEN YOUR CLOCK RESETS TO ZERO
243
00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:46,379
YOUR HARDWARE RECONFIGURES INTO
A MURDEROUS FOUR-WHEELED CAR.
244
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,849
I CAN'T KEEP
RUNNING PEOPLE OVER.
245
00:10:48,881 --> 00:10:50,850
I'M NOT FAMOUS ENOUGH
TO GET AWAY WITH IT.
246
00:10:50,951 --> 00:10:52,418
CAN'T YOU HELP ME?
247
00:10:52,519 --> 00:10:56,489
YES, BUT YOU MUST BE WILLING
TO PAY A TERRIBLE PRICE.
248
00:10:56,523 --> 00:10:58,692
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
249
00:10:58,792 --> 00:11:01,327
FOLLOW ME.
250
00:11:03,029 --> 00:11:04,865
ACCORDING TO THIS ANCIENT
"READ ME" FILE
251
00:11:04,965 --> 00:11:08,600
YOUR ONLY HOPE IS
TO DESTROY THE
ORIGINAL WERE-CAR.
252
00:11:08,701 --> 00:11:09,535
I'M WITH YOU.
253
00:11:09,568 --> 00:11:10,971
IN ITS DEATH THROES
254
00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:15,042
THE DREAD CAR WILL BEAM OUT
THE VIRUS'S UNINSTALL PROGRAM
255
00:11:15,142 --> 00:11:17,344
THUS, RIDDING YOU OF THE CURSE.
256
00:11:17,443 --> 00:11:19,645
AND, OTHERWISE, I CAN NEVER DIE?
257
00:11:19,678 --> 00:11:21,648
WHO SAID THAT?
SURE YOU CAN DIE.
258
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:22,581
YOU WANT TO DIE?
259
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:23,817
NO! I WANT TO LIVE.
260
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:26,019
THERE'S STILL TOO MANY THINGS
I DON'T OWN.
261
00:11:26,052 --> 00:11:28,120
THEN LIVE ON,
FOREVER CURSED.
262
00:11:28,221 --> 00:11:32,192
EACH NIGHT, YOUR ATTACKS
WILL BECOME MORE GRUESOME
263
00:11:32,225 --> 00:11:33,692
UNTIL ONE DARK NIGHT
264
00:11:33,793 --> 00:11:37,197
YOU ARE DOOMED TO KILL
YOUR DEAREST FRIEND.
265
00:11:37,297 --> 00:11:38,331
[ Gulps ]
266
00:11:38,365 --> 00:11:40,332
I WOULDN'T WANT
TO BE ME RIGHT NOW.
267
00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:43,570
NOW, GO! GO!
268
00:11:43,669 --> 00:11:46,072
UH... COULD ONE OF YOU JUST...
269
00:11:46,173 --> 00:11:47,407
AW, FORGET IT.
270
00:11:47,506 --> 00:11:49,408
I'LL JUST SLEEP HERE.
271
00:11:49,509 --> 00:11:52,078
[ Snoring ]
272
00:11:52,178 --> 00:11:54,713
[ Zapping ]
273
00:11:56,615 --> 00:11:58,051
THERE!
274
00:11:58,150 --> 00:11:59,952
NO RAMPAGING FOR
YOU TONIGHT.
275
00:12:00,086 --> 00:12:01,822
WOULDN'T IT MAKE MORE SENSE
276
00:12:01,922 --> 00:12:03,823
TO WELD EVERYONE EXCEPT ME
TO THE WALL?
277
00:12:03,923 --> 00:12:05,292
JUST RELAX, BENDER.
278
00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:08,128
TOMORROW, WE'LL PRY
YOU DOWN, HAVE A
NICE BREAKFAST
279
00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:10,831
AND THEN GO HUNT
DOWN AND SLAUGHTER
THAT ANCIENT EVIL.
280
00:12:10,931 --> 00:12:13,000
IT WILL BE A
RICH, FULL DAY.
281
00:12:14,967 --> 00:12:16,269
WELL, GOOD NIGHT.
282
00:12:16,369 --> 00:12:18,938
I'M GOING TO GO MAKE MY DINNERS
FOR THE NEXT MONTH
283
00:12:19,038 --> 00:12:19,940
AND FREEZE THEM.
284
00:12:29,649 --> 00:12:31,851
[ Mumbling Sleepily ]
285
00:12:33,352 --> 00:12:35,687
[ Beeping ]
286
00:12:37,490 --> 00:12:38,758
[ Gasps ]
287
00:12:40,759 --> 00:12:41,628
OH!
288
00:12:41,661 --> 00:12:43,663
[ Yelling ]
289
00:12:50,102 --> 00:12:52,438
[ Engine Revving ]
290
00:12:52,538 --> 00:12:54,173
[ Tires Squealing ]
291
00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:05,818
[ Howling ]
292
00:13:05,852 --> 00:13:07,187
HONK! HONK!
293
00:13:09,022 --> 00:13:10,857
HONK! HONK!
294
00:13:12,860 --> 00:13:14,793
HONK!
295
00:13:14,894 --> 00:13:17,129
HONK!
296
00:13:18,697 --> 00:13:20,399
[ Engine Revving ]
297
00:13:23,169 --> 00:13:24,504
BENDER, NO!
298
00:13:24,537 --> 00:13:25,972
FRY, STAY BACK!
299
00:13:29,808 --> 00:13:32,178
[ Panting ]
300
00:13:32,211 --> 00:13:33,379
YOU JERK!
301
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:35,414
I THOUGHT I WAS
YOUR BEST FRIEND.
302
00:13:35,514 --> 00:13:37,850
WHAT KIND OF TWO-TIMING
KILLMOBILE ARE YOU?
303
00:13:39,052 --> 00:13:41,754
[ Screaming ]
304
00:13:56,937 --> 00:13:59,505
[ Grunts ]
305
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:05,445
HUH?
306
00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:10,517
[ Barking ]
307
00:14:12,684 --> 00:14:13,852
I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.
308
00:14:13,953 --> 00:14:16,188
BENDER'S SUPPOSED TO
MURDER HIS CLOSEST FRIEND
309
00:14:16,288 --> 00:14:18,991
WHICH I THOUGHT WAS ME, BUT
HE WENT STRAIGHT FOR YOU.
310
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:21,494
HE DIDN'T EVEN TRY
TO SECOND-DEGREE MURDER ME.
311
00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:22,995
COULD YOU GIVE
ME SOME HELP?
312
00:14:23,029 --> 00:14:24,530
I THINK BENDER
CRUSHED MY FOOT.
313
00:14:24,630 --> 00:14:26,099
STOP RUBBING IT IN.
314
00:14:29,101 --> 00:14:31,370
[ Shrieking ]
315
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:38,345
OH, GOD.
316
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:40,613
FRY, I'M SO GLAD TO SEE YOU.
317
00:14:40,647 --> 00:14:41,813
I DIDN'T HURT
YOU, DID I?
318
00:14:41,914 --> 00:14:43,316
NOT PHYSICALLY
319
00:14:43,415 --> 00:14:46,052
BUT WHY DON'T YOU ASK
YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND, LEELA?
320
00:14:46,153 --> 00:14:47,486
I TRIED TO RUN
YOU OVER?
321
00:14:47,586 --> 00:14:49,489
IT WAS VERY SWEET
OF YOU, BENDER.
322
00:14:49,588 --> 00:14:51,624
FRY, IT DOESN'T
MEAN ANYTHING.
323
00:14:51,658 --> 00:14:53,426
I HAVE LOVE
ENOUGH FOR TWO.
324
00:14:53,525 --> 00:14:55,928
WORDS, NOTHING BUT
SWEET, SWEET WORDS
325
00:14:56,028 --> 00:14:59,198
THAT TURN INTO BITTER,
ORANGE WAX IN MY EARS.
326
00:14:59,231 --> 00:15:01,600
ENOUGH WITH THE FEELINGS,
YOU TWO.
327
00:15:01,701 --> 00:15:03,903
IF WE'RE GOING TO CURE BENDER,
WE'VE GOT TO GO
328
00:15:04,004 --> 00:15:06,940
BACK TO THE CASTLE AND HUNT DOWN
THE ORIGINAL WERE-CAR.
329
00:15:12,678 --> 00:15:14,514
[ Murmuring ]
330
00:15:14,614 --> 00:15:15,715
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
331
00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:17,250
CURSED, GOT IT.
[ Bender ]
WHATEVER.
332
00:15:22,822 --> 00:15:24,091
THE TRACKS LEAD HERE.
333
00:15:24,191 --> 00:15:25,258
THANKS, EAGLE EYE.
334
00:15:25,357 --> 00:15:26,426
NOW IT'S DAYLIGHT.
335
00:15:26,525 --> 00:15:28,495
SO, HE SHOULD BE
IN ROBOT FORM...
336
00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:29,828
BUT BE CAREFUL.
337
00:15:29,928 --> 00:15:32,198
MANY ROBOTS ARE STUPID
AND VIOLENT.
338
00:15:32,298 --> 00:15:34,634
I WISH I WAS STUPID AND VIOLENT.
339
00:15:34,667 --> 00:15:36,668
THEN WE'D SEE WHAT'S WHAT.
340
00:15:36,702 --> 00:15:38,837
I'D POUND HIM TILL I... OH!
341
00:15:38,870 --> 00:15:42,341
GET YE TO YOUR HOUSES,
YE IGNORANT VILLAGERS.
342
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:44,010
HEY!
343
00:15:44,043 --> 00:15:45,945
WE ARE NOT
IGNORANT VILLAGERS.
344
00:15:46,046 --> 00:15:48,315
WE'RE SOPHISTICATED
NEW NEW YORKERS.
345
00:15:48,347 --> 00:15:49,982
WHUP HIS BUTT!
346
00:15:51,618 --> 00:15:53,552
STOP! WHAT ARE YE DOING?
347
00:15:53,653 --> 00:15:55,955
WE'RE WHALING ON
THE ORIGINAL WERE-CAR
348
00:15:56,056 --> 00:15:57,456
WHICH IS YOU, YOU JERK.
349
00:15:57,557 --> 00:15:59,558
YE THINK ME BE HE?
350
00:15:59,658 --> 00:16:00,793
SI!
351
00:16:00,826 --> 00:16:02,729
NEE. I MEAN, NO.
352
00:16:02,828 --> 00:16:05,631
I WAS GIVEN THE CURSE
MANY A YEAR AGO
353
00:16:05,664 --> 00:16:09,235
WHILE ON A BIRD-WATCHING TRIP
TO THE ARCTIC.
354
00:16:09,336 --> 00:16:11,803
I WAS ATTACKED
BY A VICIOUS MOTORIZED SLED.
355
00:16:11,837 --> 00:16:13,706
THE NATIVES CALLED IT...
356
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:17,043
THE ABOMINABLE SNOWMOBILE.
357
00:16:19,145 --> 00:16:20,513
YES, IT'S TRUE.
358
00:16:20,547 --> 00:16:23,549
I RAN OVER THAT BIRD-WATCHING
JERK AND A HUNDRED OTHERS
359
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:26,352
EVEN MY BEST FRIEND
FROM AROMATHERAPY SCHOOL.
360
00:16:26,385 --> 00:16:28,355
I ONCE HAD A BEST FRIEND
361
00:16:28,455 --> 00:16:31,191
WHO LIKED TO SMELL THINGS
WITH ME.
362
00:16:31,291 --> 00:16:33,993
ALAS! I'M AFRAID I'M NOT
THE ORIGINAL WERE-CAR.
363
00:16:34,027 --> 00:16:35,528
I RECEIVED THE CURSE
364
00:16:35,628 --> 00:16:38,197
WHILE TAKING A LEARNING ANNEX
CLASS FROM A FAMOUS ROBOT ACTOR.
365
00:16:38,230 --> 00:16:40,167
YOU KNOW HIM AS...
366
00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:42,201
CALCULON!
367
00:16:42,235 --> 00:16:43,669
OH, FATE MOST CRUEL!
368
00:16:43,702 --> 00:16:48,307
WOULD THAT MY BOUNDLESS ACTING
SKILLS MIGHT AVAIL ME A SWORD
369
00:16:48,341 --> 00:16:51,477
WITH WHICH TO SLAY
THIS WRETCHED CURSE.
370
00:16:51,510 --> 00:16:52,845
LET'S KICK HIM
SOME MORE!
371
00:16:52,879 --> 00:16:54,246
NO, WAIT, LET ME EXPLAIN.
372
00:16:54,346 --> 00:16:58,551
IT ALL BEGAN ONE FATEFUL NIGHT
A THOUSAND YEARS AGO.
373
00:16:58,650 --> 00:17:00,187
WHOA! WHOA!
WHOA! WHOA!
374
00:17:00,287 --> 00:17:01,754
YOU'RE 1,000
YEARS OLD?
375
00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:03,556
YOUR BIO SAYS
YOU'RE 27.
376
00:17:03,655 --> 00:17:07,394
LIES! I CHANGE MY IDENTITY
AND UPGRADE MY APPEARANCE
377
00:17:07,493 --> 00:17:09,862
EVERY FEW DECADES
TO AVOID SUSPICION.
378
00:17:09,961 --> 00:17:12,865
I WAS ALL OF HISTORY'S GREAT
ACTING ROBOTS:
379
00:17:12,898 --> 00:17:16,836
ACTING UNIT 0.8, THESPOMAT,
DAVID DUCHOVNY.
380
00:17:16,868 --> 00:17:19,205
LOOK, ARE YOU
THE ORIGINAL WERE-CAR OR NOT?
381
00:17:19,306 --> 00:17:21,874
NO, BUT YOU ARE NEARING THE END
OF YOUR SEARCH
382
00:17:21,907 --> 00:17:25,244
FOR, YOU SEE, I WAS ATTACKED
BY THE ORIGINAL WERE-CAR.
383
00:17:25,278 --> 00:17:27,046
GIVE US A NAME, MacBUTT!
384
00:17:27,146 --> 00:17:28,847
THE YEAR WAS 2019
385
00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:32,050
AND I WAS JUST A LOWLY ROBOT ARM
386
00:17:32,152 --> 00:17:34,886
WORKING IN
AN AUTOMOTIVE RESEARCH LAB.
387
00:17:34,987 --> 00:17:37,089
I WAS WORKING ON PROJECT SATAN
388
00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:39,159
A SAVAGE,
INTELLIGENT MILITARY VEHICLE
389
00:17:39,259 --> 00:17:40,727
BUILT FROM THE MOST EVIL PARTS
390
00:17:40,826 --> 00:17:43,096
OF THE MOST EVIL CARS
IN ALL THE WORLD--
391
00:17:43,195 --> 00:17:45,464
THE STEERING WHEEL
FROM HITLER'S STAFF CAR
392
00:17:45,498 --> 00:17:48,234
THE LEFT TURN SIGNAL
FROM CHARLES MANSON'S VW
393
00:17:48,335 --> 00:17:49,635
THE WINDSHIELD WIPERS
394
00:17:49,669 --> 00:17:51,938
FROM THAT CAR
THAT PLAYED KNIGHT RIDER.
395
00:17:52,038 --> 00:17:53,105
KNIGHT RIDER WASN'T EVIL.
396
00:17:53,205 --> 00:17:54,707
HIS WINDSHIELD
WIPERS WERE.
397
00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:57,042
IT DIDN'T COME UP MUCH
IN THE SHOW, THOUGH.
398
00:17:57,076 --> 00:17:59,746
ANYWAY... ONLY AFTER BRINGING
PROJECT SATAN TO LIFE
399
00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:02,515
DID THEY DISCOVER THEY
HAD MADE A HORRIBLE MISTAKE.
400
00:18:02,615 --> 00:18:05,084
FOR YOU SEE...
401
00:18:05,117 --> 00:18:07,453
IT WAS PURE EVIL.
402
00:18:11,490 --> 00:18:12,791
HONK! HONK!
403
00:18:12,825 --> 00:18:13,992
[ Howls ]
404
00:18:14,026 --> 00:18:16,262
SO WHAT HAPPENED
TO PROJECT SATAN?
405
00:18:16,363 --> 00:18:19,798
IT'S EITHER IN PARIS,
OR, MUCH MORE LIKELY...
406
00:18:19,832 --> 00:18:22,469
STILL IN THE ABANDONED
AUTOMOTIVE LAB.
407
00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:30,710
YOU GUYS DISTRACT
THE WERE-CAR
408
00:18:30,809 --> 00:18:33,645
AND I'LL KILL IT
BY PLUGGING ITS
EXHAUST PIPE
409
00:18:33,680 --> 00:18:35,214
WITH THIS
SILVER POTATO.
410
00:18:38,518 --> 00:18:40,186
PSST! THERE IT IS.
411
00:18:40,287 --> 00:18:43,823
[ Crying ]
412
00:18:43,855 --> 00:18:45,657
IT LOOKS SO UNHAPPY.
413
00:18:46,858 --> 00:18:49,961
EXCUSE ME, ARE YOU
PROJECT SATAN?
414
00:18:49,996 --> 00:18:53,065
[ Mumbling ]
415
00:18:53,165 --> 00:18:54,233
DON'T BE AFRAID.
416
00:18:54,334 --> 00:18:55,835
WE KNOW WHAT YOU ARE.
417
00:18:55,867 --> 00:18:57,170
YOU DO?
418
00:18:57,203 --> 00:19:00,673
WOULD YOU LIKE
US TO... PUT YOU
OUT OF YOUR MISERY?
419
00:19:00,707 --> 00:19:02,074
MISERY, WHAT MISERY?
420
00:19:02,174 --> 00:19:03,809
I LOVE KILLING PEOPLE--
421
00:19:03,843 --> 00:19:08,315
SQUISHING THEM TILL THEIR ORGANS
SQUIRT OUT LIKE CHUNKY MUSTARD.
422
00:19:08,347 --> 00:19:10,349
LOOK, EVERYONE LOVES
KILLING PEOPLE
423
00:19:10,383 --> 00:19:12,318
BUT I DON'T WANT
TO HURT MY FRIENDS.
424
00:19:12,352 --> 00:19:13,385
HUMPH!
425
00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:14,820
[ Clock Chimes ]
426
00:19:14,854 --> 00:19:16,355
OOH!
427
00:19:16,388 --> 00:19:18,258
OH, NO! IT'S MIDNIGHT!
428
00:19:18,357 --> 00:19:21,160
HEY, THIS IS STARTING
TO FEEL PRETTY GOOD.
429
00:19:21,193 --> 00:19:23,195
[ Both Laughing Maniacally ]
430
00:19:24,864 --> 00:19:26,266
FRY, DISTRACT HIM!
431
00:19:26,365 --> 00:19:28,667
HEY, PROJECT SATAN,
OVER HERE!
432
00:19:28,701 --> 00:19:29,801
I'M A BLIND PEDESTRIAN!
433
00:19:29,836 --> 00:19:31,170
20 POINTS!
434
00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:38,009
OH NO!
435
00:19:38,109 --> 00:19:39,711
THERE'S NO EXHAUST PIPE.
436
00:19:39,811 --> 00:19:43,883
THAT'S RIGHT, THANKS TO
ED BEGLEY, JR.'S ELECTRIC MOTOR
437
00:19:43,982 --> 00:19:47,487
THE MOST EVIL PROPULSION SYSTEM
EVER CONCEIVED!
438
00:19:47,519 --> 00:19:49,055
[ Laughing ]
439
00:19:49,154 --> 00:19:51,523
[ Groans ]
440
00:19:54,260 --> 00:19:56,762
TAKE WHICHEVER
ONE YOU WANT.
441
00:19:58,565 --> 00:20:01,867
OH, BOY, I FEEL LIKE
A CAR IN A CANDY STORE.
442
00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:07,640
[ Growling ]
443
00:20:09,576 --> 00:20:11,810
YES! HE CHOSE ME.
444
00:20:11,911 --> 00:20:14,814
HE'S TRYING TO KILL ME.
445
00:20:14,913 --> 00:20:17,584
LEELA, I'M SO HAPPY.
446
00:20:17,683 --> 00:20:18,785
[ Panting ]
447
00:20:22,153 --> 00:20:23,722
OH, THANKS, BENDER.
448
00:20:23,823 --> 00:20:26,792
[ Choking ]
HEY, TOO TIGHT, TOO TIGHT!
449
00:20:26,826 --> 00:20:29,729
[ Groaning ]
450
00:20:36,969 --> 00:20:38,837
WHOA!
451
00:20:38,938 --> 00:20:40,640
[ Yells ]
452
00:20:41,807 --> 00:20:43,643
WHOA!
453
00:20:43,675 --> 00:20:45,612
[ All Screaming ]
454
00:20:50,982 --> 00:20:52,951
[ Laughing ]
455
00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:55,288
[ Gasps ]
456
00:20:55,322 --> 00:20:56,655
[ Whimpering ]
457
00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:59,858
NO! NO! NO! NO!
458
00:20:59,959 --> 00:21:02,429
[ Circuits Pulsating ]
459
00:21:02,528 --> 00:21:03,996
[ Beeping ]
460
00:21:05,531 --> 00:21:07,334
UH-OH!
461
00:21:07,433 --> 00:21:10,470
[ Yelling ]
462
00:21:10,502 --> 00:21:11,671
[ Grunts ]
463
00:21:11,703 --> 00:21:13,472
OH!
464
00:21:13,506 --> 00:21:14,973
BENDER, YOU'RE CURED!
465
00:21:15,007 --> 00:21:16,709
BUT WHAT HAPPENED TO FRY?
466
00:21:16,808 --> 00:21:18,310
I MUST HAVE KILLED HIM.
467
00:21:18,345 --> 00:21:22,280
[ Crying ]
HE WAS MY BEST FRIEND,
AND I KILLED HIM.
468
00:21:22,382 --> 00:21:23,950
OH!
469
00:21:24,049 --> 00:21:26,786
I NEVER FELT SO EMPTY INSIDE.
470
00:21:26,885 --> 00:21:28,555
BENDER, I'M ALIVE!
471
00:21:28,654 --> 00:21:29,888
YOU DIDN'T HURT ME AT ALL
472
00:21:29,989 --> 00:21:32,991
BUT I KNOW YOU WANTED TO,
AND THAT'S WHAT MATTERS.
473
00:21:35,161 --> 00:21:36,328
HERE'S TO YOU.
474
00:21:36,363 --> 00:21:37,329
[ Gulping ]
475
00:21:37,364 --> 00:21:38,498
[ Sighs ]
476
00:21:38,530 --> 00:21:41,634
HEY, THAT'S MY LAST BEER,
YOU BASTARD!
477
00:21:41,667 --> 00:21:42,835
I'LL KILL YOU!
478
00:21:42,868 --> 00:21:44,836
I'LL KILL YOU, TOO, BUDDY.
479
00:21:44,936 --> 00:21:46,472
I'LL KILL YOU, TOO.
480
00:21:48,375 --> 00:21:50,542
[ Gagging ]
HEY!
481
00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:52,144
[ Choking ]
482
00:21:52,177 --> 00:21:54,713
[ Choking Continuing ]
29699
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