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531
00:00:11,360 --> 00:00:14,113
- Monica...
- 'Who's Monica?'
2
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:17,309
- Mum...
- Mum?
3
00:00:17,400 --> 00:00:21,109
She looks absolutely beautiful.
l miss her.
4
00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:23,873
- Marry me.
- You know l've got a boyfriend.
5
00:00:24,880 --> 00:00:27,348
Two grand's worth of debt
and still rising!
6
00:00:27,440 --> 00:00:30,432
- 'Where is he?'
- 'We have got bailiffs front and back.'
7
00:00:30,520 --> 00:00:33,830
'Do you know your new name, Frank?
Dead Man Walking.'
8
00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:36,832
Mr Wilson, Housing Officer.
9
00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:41,311
You won't get away with that one
cos l'll haunt you for every last penny,
10
00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:43,231
- madam.
- (Screaming)
11
00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:47,108
He's no more help than you. We'd have
been better off without both of you.
12
00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:49,077
Over to you...Mum!
13
00:00:49,160 --> 00:00:50,991
Your house. Drive.
14
00:00:54,080 --> 00:00:57,629
'Nobody's saying the Chatsworth Estate
is the Garden of Eden
15
00:00:57,720 --> 00:01:01,599
'but it's been a good home to us,
to me, Frank Gallagher,
16
00:01:01,680 --> 00:01:05,355
'and me kids, who l'm proud of,
17
00:01:05,440 --> 00:01:08,352
'cos every one of 'em
reminds me a little of me.
18
00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:10,635
'They can all think for themselves
19
00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:12,676
'which they've me to thank for.'
20
00:01:12,760 --> 00:01:14,079
Run for it!
21
00:01:14,160 --> 00:01:16,958
'Fiona, who's a massive help.
22
00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:21,955
'Lip's a bit of a gobshite, which is
why nobody calls him Phillip any more.
23
00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:24,759
'lan is like his mam,
which is handy for the others
24
00:01:24,840 --> 00:01:26,671
'cos she's vanished into thin air.
25
00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:29,433
'We daren't let Carl
grow his hair for two reasons.
26
00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:33,513
'One, it stands on end and makes
him look like Toyah. Two, nits love him.
27
00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:36,637
'Debbie! Sent by God. Total angel.
28
00:01:36,720 --> 00:01:40,633
'You've to check your change,
but she'll always do you a favour.
29
00:01:40,720 --> 00:01:43,439
'Plus Liam! Gonna be a star.
30
00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:46,796
'Once we've got the fits under control.
31
00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:49,110
'Steve - Fiona's boyfriend.
32
00:01:49,200 --> 00:01:52,556
'The truth is out there. Not.
33
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:55,194
'Fantastic neighbours -
Kev and Veronica.
34
00:01:55,280 --> 00:01:57,475
'Lend you anything. Well, not anything.
35
00:01:57,560 --> 00:02:01,348
'But all of 'em, to a man,
know first and foremost
36
00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:04,352
'one of the most vital necessities
in this life
37
00:02:04,440 --> 00:02:07,557
'is they know how to throw a party!
38
00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:09,835
'Heh-heh-heh-heh! Scatter!'
39
00:02:11,880 --> 00:02:13,836
(Wailing)
40
00:02:13,920 --> 00:02:17,833
(Frank) 'l've dreamt about lesbians
for as long as l can remember
41
00:02:17,920 --> 00:02:22,198
'but l bet l'm the only bloke who,
when his best wish gets granted,
42
00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:25,989
'has to accept that the only lezzer
he'll ever get his hands on
43
00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:28,355
'is his ex-wife.
44
00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:32,353
'Not only is she not in the sack
with Olivia Newton-John,
45
00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:35,989
'she's picked an oppo
who's bigger and stronger than l am
46
00:02:36,080 --> 00:02:38,036
'and earns more than l ever could.'
47
00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:41,395
(Carl) Mum, come and make
the breakfast.
48
00:02:43,480 --> 00:02:45,436
Jesus. Oh, my God.
49
00:02:45,520 --> 00:02:48,318
- Y'all right, Norm?
- No, summat just moved.
50
00:02:48,400 --> 00:02:52,393
- God, it is. lt's a bloody rat!
- Don't be daft. lt'll be the wind.
51
00:02:52,480 --> 00:02:54,436
(Squeaking)
52
00:02:54,520 --> 00:02:56,556
So what's this?
53
00:02:56,640 --> 00:02:58,870
A fart in a fur?
54
00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:04,753
(Debbie)
Mum, we're gonna be late for school!
55
00:03:04,840 --> 00:03:07,638
You cannot tread backwards, Monica.
56
00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:09,551
You don't belong here.
57
00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:17,870
(Frank) 'The day l married Monica
was the happiest day of my life.
58
00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:21,953
'The day she left me
looking after six kids, l thought,
59
00:03:22,040 --> 00:03:25,589
'''Right, fuck her.''
The day she reappears after three years
60
00:03:25,680 --> 00:03:29,468
'l just thought, ''Absolutely.
Go on, Frank. Fuck her.'''
61
00:03:29,560 --> 00:03:32,836
You spent the last three years
burying all this.
62
00:03:32,920 --> 00:03:34,672
There you go, love.
63
00:03:34,760 --> 00:03:37,877
Oh, l can't eat eggs.
l'm allergic. They're Carl's.
64
00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:40,030
Carl! Your tits are ready!
65
00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:43,874
- You never used to be allergic to eggs.
- l almost died from 'em.
66
00:03:43,960 --> 00:03:47,111
Your mum's trying to have
a conversation here.
67
00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:49,156
We can do our own breakfast.
68
00:03:49,240 --> 00:03:52,550
- lf you want privacy, go back in the van.
- lt stinks!
69
00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:55,438
- Never used to.
- l've just killed a rat that size.
70
00:03:55,520 --> 00:03:57,875
- Haven't l, Mon?
- Yeah.
71
00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:01,752
What size?
72
00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:07,230
What colour?
73
00:04:09,100 --> 00:04:15,174
The Venom - $5 million GTD Poker Tourney
Download AmericasCardroom.com
74
00:04:25,520 --> 00:04:28,512
Who in their right mind
keeps a rat as a pet?
75
00:04:34,720 --> 00:04:37,075
Pack up. We're going back to Moston.
76
00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:39,276
lt's like Village Of The Damned.
77
00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:42,955
- Who else will look after 'em?
- Never bothered you before.
78
00:04:43,040 --> 00:04:45,395
Well, Fiona was here before.
79
00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:54,874
l'm not asking for a court report, only
if she sorted the school uniform out.
80
00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:57,554
Yes, cos lan nipped round with the milk.
81
00:04:57,640 --> 00:05:02,350
- So Monica hasn't abandoned the kids?
- lt was all kosher when l popped round.
82
00:05:02,440 --> 00:05:07,116
Even Carl's? lf he forgets his tie
one more time, they'll suspend him.
83
00:05:07,200 --> 00:05:10,636
- Oi! l'm trying to have a life here!
- 'Oh, fine.'
84
00:05:10,720 --> 00:05:13,473
l'll go round and check in three minutes.
85
00:05:13,560 --> 00:05:16,916
Make sure the kids have all got
my number and enough cash.
86
00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:19,275
Shall l do the washing-up as well(? )
87
00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:21,271
- l'm being serious.
- 'And me brief.'
88
00:05:21,360 --> 00:05:23,715
Ring us back in...half an hour or so.
89
00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:26,109
What are they like?
90
00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:29,112
Be quick.
l want to check Carl's got his tie.
91
00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:31,156
Aye, hang on. That's it.
92
00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:33,595
Oh, Kev! Oh!
93
00:05:38,760 --> 00:05:42,275
- (Whirring)
- (Frank) # Sunshine on a rainy day
94
00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:46,675
# Sunshine on a rainy day #
95
00:05:48,240 --> 00:05:50,196
(Hairdryer off)
96
00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:09,676
Yeah, you're right. lt fits.
97
00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:12,832
A month ago,
you said you wouldn't be seen dead in it.
98
00:06:12,920 --> 00:06:16,230
Can't you take a joke?
l'm going for a paper. Owt you want?
99
00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:21,110
Yeah, get us enough for an overdose.
Tell the chemist l'll pay him later.
100
00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:23,953
Joke! Just practising.
101
00:06:24,040 --> 00:06:26,395
Hey, and a good 'un.
102
00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:28,152
See you later.
103
00:06:28,240 --> 00:06:30,834
l usually get a kiss.
104
00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:44,672
(lmaginary birds screeching)
105
00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:01,994
(Frank) (Kev, see if
anyone's looking for us.)
106
00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:35,275
- Watch. Watch.
- (Phone bleeping)
107
00:07:41,640 --> 00:07:43,596
Two bailiffs, six o'clock.
108
00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:47,229
- ls that front or back?
- Back, back. So be sharp.
109
00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:51,276
And watch out for Wilson.
110
00:07:51,360 --> 00:07:53,794
lt's the shirt l'm feeling sorry for.
111
00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:57,837
lt's not my fault
he's getting a stiffy for his ex.
112
00:07:57,920 --> 00:07:59,876
Best not be either.
113
00:08:31,080 --> 00:08:33,275
Hughesy! Hughesy, come here.
114
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,875
Michael, over.
115
00:08:42,400 --> 00:08:46,029
Monica? Frank wants to see you.
116
00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:55,192
Don't dribble on that.
You're not keeping it.
117
00:08:56,440 --> 00:08:58,510
Not you! Where's Monica?
118
00:08:58,600 --> 00:09:02,434
Two reasons why Monica'll
never make it home - size doesn't matter
119
00:09:02,520 --> 00:09:05,034
and it's just a blister. lt'll fade.
120
00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:08,556
Day we wed,
it was till death do us part.
121
00:09:08,640 --> 00:09:10,278
- lf that's a threat...
- No.
122
00:09:10,360 --> 00:09:13,989
lt's just a promise that she made me
on our wedding day.
123
00:09:14,080 --> 00:09:16,833
Are these dead, fellas?
124
00:09:16,920 --> 00:09:21,471
Here, chick. Fetch us a couple of bevvies
and whatever Worzel's having.
125
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:26,031
Pint of Dog, cheese and onion pie
and some more nuts. She's paying.
126
00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:28,953
More nuts? ln your dreams, daddio.
127
00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:30,792
That's a good 'un.
128
00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:34,111
- ls he allowed all this?
- Frank thinks l owe him big style
129
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:36,760
- so he can have what he wants.
- And two Es.
130
00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:48,476
Two years ago
131
00:09:48,560 --> 00:09:51,916
we rescued a woman and her kids
from a total psycho.
132
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:54,594
l'm not fucking interested.
133
00:09:54,680 --> 00:09:57,558
She'd have been dead now
if we hadn't killed her.
134
00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:01,836
Cos of him, she owed thousands.
135
00:10:01,920 --> 00:10:05,549
And she walked away
without so much as a paper bill.
136
00:10:05,640 --> 00:10:09,519
All we needed was one official agency
to list her as dead.
137
00:10:09,600 --> 00:10:12,797
Within a week,
it all went as quiet as a mouse for her.
138
00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:16,873
No debts, no bailiffs, no hassle...
139
00:10:16,960 --> 00:10:18,916
just like that.
140
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:20,956
lmagine that, Frank.
141
00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:24,430
You pretend to be dead,
but your debts die for real.
142
00:10:30,680 --> 00:10:32,352
Actually, Sheila,
143
00:10:32,440 --> 00:10:36,149
we've had complaints about noise
from the neighbours.
144
00:10:36,240 --> 00:10:38,196
You having a bit of trouble?
145
00:10:39,280 --> 00:10:42,192
Frank's ex coming round
shouting the odds.
146
00:10:42,280 --> 00:10:47,434
They haven't seen each other for a bit
so they'd a lot to say, as it happens.
147
00:10:53,120 --> 00:10:55,953
You and Fiona,
you're as mad as each other.
148
00:10:56,040 --> 00:10:59,794
You'll spend your lives
cleaning up after Frank. ls he worth that?
149
00:10:59,880 --> 00:11:03,998
l'd give my right arm to spend my life
cleaning up after Frank.
150
00:11:06,080 --> 00:11:08,036
- Have you met Monica?
- No.
151
00:11:08,120 --> 00:11:12,159
Cracking on, she's a lesbian.
l saw the way she looked at him.
152
00:11:12,240 --> 00:11:16,836
- Fiona's mum's a lesbian?
- Not for long, she's not. You watch.
153
00:11:24,080 --> 00:11:26,389
Hey, hey... Here y'are.
154
00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:29,153
l can't see anybody fighting over Frank.
155
00:11:29,240 --> 00:11:31,595
l would if l could.
156
00:11:31,680 --> 00:11:34,911
She's got her feet back under the table
at Fiona's
157
00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:37,958
except it's not Fiona's
cos she's forced her out.
158
00:11:38,040 --> 00:11:41,157
- What? Fiona's gone?
- No choice. She's gone to live...
159
00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:42,992
- Where's she gone?
- Aaargh!
160
00:11:43,080 --> 00:11:45,355
- Aaaarghh, Michael!
- What?
161
00:11:45,440 --> 00:11:47,078
(Screaming)
162
00:11:47,160 --> 00:11:49,754
- What've you done to her?
- Tissue!
163
00:11:49,840 --> 00:11:51,910
- lt's there in your hand.
- l know!
164
00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:53,752
l wiped me eyes!
165
00:11:53,840 --> 00:11:55,671
Chillies! Cooking with chillies!
166
00:11:55,760 --> 00:11:58,069
- l can't see!
- Bring her to the sink!
167
00:11:58,160 --> 00:12:01,391
- Let's have a look.
- Don't touch her if you held the towel!
168
00:12:01,480 --> 00:12:04,631
- l'm blind!
- Here you are, this way. This way.
169
00:12:04,720 --> 00:12:06,358
Rest on t'wall.
170
00:12:06,440 --> 00:12:08,510
Come into the kitchen. Sheila!
171
00:12:08,600 --> 00:12:10,830
(Sheila screaming)
172
00:12:10,920 --> 00:12:13,354
Here y'are, slam this over your fa...
173
00:12:18,040 --> 00:12:20,998
- (Shrieking hysterically)
- Over here, Sheila.
174
00:12:21,960 --> 00:12:23,518
Oh, my God!
175
00:12:23,600 --> 00:12:25,431
- Where am l?
- Home.
176
00:12:25,520 --> 00:12:28,193
- Chatsworth Estate.
- Where am l standing?
177
00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:29,599
Garden.
178
00:13:05,280 --> 00:13:08,238
(Birds singing)
179
00:13:14,920 --> 00:13:17,195
l did it.
180
00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:19,236
l went outside.
181
00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:23,199
- Where's Fiona gone?
- Five years.
182
00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:25,999
''She's gone to live round...''
183
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:28,274
Steve's.
184
00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:35,596
- Oh, God. l think l'm going to faint.
- No, you're fine, Mrs Jackson.
185
00:13:35,680 --> 00:13:37,511
l know...
186
00:13:37,600 --> 00:13:39,477
(Thudding)
187
00:13:39,560 --> 00:13:41,676
Well, how does it work, then?
188
00:13:41,760 --> 00:13:44,035
Two teams of girls.
We've done it for years.
189
00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:46,634
A Team deals with deaths and overseas.
190
00:13:46,720 --> 00:13:50,076
B Team specialises
in ''domestic'' manoeuvres.
191
00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:55,393
Helping like-minded chicks do a runner.
Yeah, and money, accommodation etc.
192
00:13:55,480 --> 00:13:57,198
So which one are you?
193
00:13:57,280 --> 00:14:01,319
- You need military training for A.
- We're B.
194
00:14:01,400 --> 00:14:06,599
- So...you helped Monica leave me?
- No, that was Cindy, l think.
195
00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:09,638
- The two Juliets.
- Oh.
196
00:14:09,720 --> 00:14:12,712
So you knew you were a lezzer
before you fucked off?
197
00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:15,155
She's always been a chick, Frank,
198
00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:19,995
so don't build your hopes up. She can't
even look at a penis without gagging.
199
00:14:22,760 --> 00:14:26,355
So what would l have to do
if l went along with all this?
200
00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:28,476
The least, which is lucky.
201
00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:34,875
He thinks he stands a chance
and he won't listen to me.
202
00:14:34,960 --> 00:14:37,679
Well, don't apologise... Stan, yeah?
203
00:14:37,760 --> 00:14:42,390
Everyone's entitled to give it their
best shot. You can't hate him for it.
204
00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:50,591
Why's he sniffing round Chatsworth
for a love life if he can get it anywhere?
205
00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:56,435
Think about what you've just said and
apologise when you've worked it out.
206
00:14:58,160 --> 00:15:01,311
- l'm not saying that.
- You are fucking saying!
207
00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:04,153
- l'm not good enough for him?
- No, no, no.
208
00:15:04,240 --> 00:15:08,791
OK, maybe it came out wrong, but...
you think about what l said, Fiona.
209
00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:12,316
A middle-class bloke, money,
a fucking house this size...
210
00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:14,960
Come on. You don't meet
people like that.
211
00:15:15,040 --> 00:15:18,032
People like you
do not meet people like that.
212
00:15:18,120 --> 00:15:21,078
Oh, yeah, and Steve loves
Chatsworth so much
213
00:15:21,160 --> 00:15:24,038
- he asked you to move in here.
- No, it was my idea.
214
00:15:24,120 --> 00:15:26,680
He thinks coming here is a mistake.
215
00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:29,149
- For?
- Me, the kids.
216
00:15:29,240 --> 00:15:32,391
l have left them
with my mum and her girlfriend -
217
00:15:32,480 --> 00:15:35,119
neither of 'em capable
of running that house.
218
00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:39,478
And it's the kids that are suffering -
again. And l agree with him.
219
00:15:39,560 --> 00:15:43,109
lt's Steve saying that.
lt's him talking me around.
220
00:15:43,200 --> 00:15:48,069
He spends more time at ours than he
does here. He'd move in permanently!
221
00:15:48,920 --> 00:15:52,390
- What?!
- That's the whole fucking point!
222
00:15:56,880 --> 00:15:58,438
How's that normal?
223
00:15:58,520 --> 00:16:02,149
A 25-year-old bloke.
He buys stuff like this.
224
00:16:03,560 --> 00:16:08,270
Oh, no, he'd rather stay on an estate with
his girlfriend and five suffering kids -
225
00:16:08,360 --> 00:16:11,397
- none of 'em hers.
- Make it sound like a pigsty.
226
00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:15,155
That's what it would look like to him.
How could it not?
227
00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:17,276
- (Door opening)
- Think.
228
00:16:17,360 --> 00:16:19,078
(Steve) Sorry, Helmet, time's up.
229
00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:23,233
Fiona, the kids just rang.
They need us round at yours now.
230
00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:28,118
l'm going. Think about what l said, Fiona.
231
00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:45,876
Right, go, Stan!
232
00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:48,633
Didn't l say l can often surprise myself?
233
00:16:48,720 --> 00:16:50,995
l'm not in the fucking mood. Drive!
234
00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:54,311
l'm not in the fucking mood either,
so calm down.
235
00:16:54,400 --> 00:16:57,039
Wing mirror. Blue car. His? Yeah?
236
00:16:58,240 --> 00:17:00,913
So? He doesn't have to pay for it.
His work does.
237
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:03,956
lt's nicked.
238
00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:10,438
The VlN number
doesn't match the reg plate.
239
00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:14,115
- How do you know?
- He's got a pair of plates in the boot.
240
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:17,317
Not the current one.
Not the original one either.
241
00:17:17,400 --> 00:17:22,474
Hey, again, Mr Premature Ejaculation.
Buckle up. We've got work to do.
242
00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:23,879
- We nick him.
- We will.
243
00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,518
But if we nick him for more,
244
00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:29,991
we're looking at a longer-term sentence,
not a holiday camp. Get me?
245
00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:41,916
What's going on?
246
00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:44,389
(Monica) Your dad's got news for you.
247
00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:49,270
(Frank) l'm dying, apparently.
248
00:17:51,600 --> 00:17:53,477
(Fiona) You what?
249
00:17:56,040 --> 00:17:58,759
(Phone ringing)
250
00:17:58,840 --> 00:18:00,796
Yeah, Steven with a V.
251
00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:03,796
McBride.
252
00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:11,193
62 Whalley Lane, Manchester M14 2KM.
253
00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:17,116
(Wilson) lt's not good news.
254
00:18:17,200 --> 00:18:18,872
But don't blame me.
255
00:18:18,960 --> 00:18:21,520
Eviction notice.
256
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:26,276
They want you out. They mean it.
They've had enough of your dad -
257
00:18:26,360 --> 00:18:29,113
not so much the deviance as the lies.
258
00:18:30,240 --> 00:18:32,549
Well, they'll love the next bit.
259
00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:35,516
You best come in, Mr Wilson.
260
00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:49,038
Oh, sweet Jesus, no!
261
00:18:49,120 --> 00:18:51,918
Both wrists and a bottle of tablets.
262
00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:53,956
- l blame meself.
- So do l.
263
00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:56,679
- We all do.
- l'm off to work.
264
00:18:56,760 --> 00:18:59,399
Work? Surely not?
265
00:18:59,480 --> 00:19:02,870
l fucking hated him.
And l need the money.
266
00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:11,113
Are you OK, Mr Wilson?
267
00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:14,715
lt was never the best job in the world,
but never this bad
268
00:19:14,800 --> 00:19:16,597
by a long chalk.
269
00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:22,757
Do you mind if l...
270
00:19:23,840 --> 00:19:28,709
Please do. He'd appreciate it
if you paid your respects.
271
00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:39,796
Dear Lord,
help us house the tenants we could
272
00:19:39,880 --> 00:19:43,509
Show compassion and mercy
whenever we should
273
00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:45,477
Lord...
274
00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:49,314
Give us strength
when full strength is needed
275
00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:52,676
To nail the ones we know
who have cheated
276
00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:58,515
Dear Lord, let not this trickiest job
277
00:19:58,600 --> 00:20:00,272
Make us grand
278
00:20:00,360 --> 00:20:03,909
Or smug or proud
279
00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:05,433
Or snobs.
280
00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:10,470
Something written by wife
to help me get through the job.
281
00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:14,758
She died last summer so l know
what you're all going through.
282
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:18,832
So she'll be with me dad?
283
00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:21,309
No, she'll be over the other side
284
00:20:21,400 --> 00:20:23,197
probably.
285
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:26,113
(Funeral bells chiming)
286
00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:30,794
Dead? How?
287
00:20:30,880 --> 00:20:33,235
Woman over there says heart attack.
288
00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:35,276
Fucking hell...
289
00:20:35,360 --> 00:20:39,831
- Poor Frank.
- No, there's summat not right about this.
290
00:20:39,920 --> 00:20:41,876
- Dad!
- Get off!
291
00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:46,078
- Another verse and l'd have croaked.
- Get back in the coffin!
292
00:20:46,160 --> 00:20:51,154
lt freaks me out. l'm having flashbacks
to me mam. She's taking the piss.
293
00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:54,312
- She's trying to show me up.
- You don't need help.
294
00:20:54,400 --> 00:20:56,675
lf they catch you,
you're dead anyway. ln!
295
00:20:56,760 --> 00:20:59,832
Your parents had a clue,
dropping the L from ''normal''.
296
00:20:59,920 --> 00:21:02,480
l never borrowed any money
l couldn't repay.
297
00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:04,551
- You're a sad bitch.
- Dad!
298
00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:07,950
- ln your box!
- Look at all you. Where's the L word?
299
00:21:08,040 --> 00:21:12,591
Loyalty - not doing what you're told
by this twisted, rug-chomping
300
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:14,830
- fucking chimp!
- lt's the bailiffs!
301
00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:17,229
lf it's a warrant, we're in trouble.
302
00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:20,073
Frank, get in the coffin.
303
00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:23,238
Get him in, quick.
304
00:21:25,360 --> 00:21:27,191
(Banging at door)
305
00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:31,594
(Banging gets louder)
306
00:21:32,800 --> 00:21:35,360
Show a bit of respect...
307
00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:45,118
You piece of shit!
308
00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:49,239
Too late to apologise for that, love.
We were only doing our jobs.
309
00:21:49,320 --> 00:21:51,709
And we feel bad enough to leave this.
310
00:21:52,720 --> 00:21:54,676
(Debbie) To keep?
311
00:21:54,760 --> 00:21:58,833
He was a good bloke, your dad. We
meet a lot like him. They mean no harm.
312
00:21:58,920 --> 00:22:01,434
They always think they can pay it back.
313
00:22:01,520 --> 00:22:03,476
Boo! You're not dead!
314
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:05,630
Get up now, you fuck!
315
00:22:05,720 --> 00:22:07,631
Michael, cut it out.
316
00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:10,029
Two and a half grand, and counting!
317
00:22:10,120 --> 00:22:12,714
- Plus the car one of you nicked.
- Michael.
318
00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:15,553
Michael! This is really, really sick.
319
00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:27,790
Hey, hey. No, look...
320
00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:30,438
l mean, l thought he was...
321
00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:32,078
l thought you were...
322
00:22:37,120 --> 00:22:39,076
Oh, shit!
323
00:22:47,120 --> 00:22:50,112
(Debbie)
Sheila, come out and help me. Help!
324
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:51,918
Debbie!
325
00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:54,719
She-Sheila!
326
00:22:55,800 --> 00:22:57,677
- Debbie!
- Sheila, help me.
327
00:22:59,520 --> 00:23:01,397
Come on, Sheila. Now!
328
00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:06,639
Get off, you bastards!
329
00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:09,280
(Screaming) Get away!
330
00:23:09,360 --> 00:23:11,271
Get away!
331
00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:16,270
Aaagh! Aaagh! Aaagh! Aaagh!
332
00:23:19,440 --> 00:23:21,396
Sheila, you did it!
333
00:23:21,480 --> 00:23:24,631
- Sheila, it worked. The plan worked!
- l did it!
334
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:28,076
l did it! l did it! l did it! l did it!
335
00:23:34,680 --> 00:23:36,671
(Sobbing)
336
00:23:47,360 --> 00:23:49,430
(Carl) He's dead!
337
00:23:49,520 --> 00:23:51,795
And he's not coming back!
338
00:24:03,920 --> 00:24:07,230
l'd love to know what people
thought about me when l'm dead.
339
00:24:07,320 --> 00:24:09,515
You wouldn't if you were Frank.
340
00:24:14,360 --> 00:24:16,316
There's Wilson.
341
00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:29,992
Family only.
342
00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:33,470
Definitely not you! Not tonight.
343
00:24:33,560 --> 00:24:38,315
There's a gazebo and dartboard round
the back for punters without invitations.
344
00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:43,155
Frank Gallagher was a deeply valued and
respected member of this community.
345
00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:44,593
(Laughter)
346
00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:48,070
He was a good friend and neighbour
and he'll be sorely missed.
347
00:24:50,080 --> 00:24:53,709
He once told me in private
that if he ever died unexpectedly
348
00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:56,678
that the one thing
he'd like saying at his wake
349
00:24:56,760 --> 00:24:58,398
was this...
350
00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:03,558
(Cheering)
351
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:07,520
l'm ali-i-ve! Heh-heh-heh!
352
00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:10,433
(# (l've Had) The Time Of My Life)
353
00:25:10,520 --> 00:25:15,833
Are you there, Martin? Who the fuck
would bury anyone in a white suit?
354
00:25:15,920 --> 00:25:17,876
Whose idea was that?
355
00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:20,155
Tonight, Matthew, l'm going to be
356
00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:22,117
a party-y-y!
357
00:25:30,040 --> 00:25:32,679
When you're ready.
358
00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:36,150
- (lan) ls it OK if l shoot off in a sec?
- Who you meeting?
359
00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:42,350
No, you've shown your face. Well done.
Once l've slung this down, l'm off.
360
00:25:42,440 --> 00:25:44,556
l thought Liam had a baby-sitter.
361
00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:47,473
- Only till nine.
- l'll come with you.
362
00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:50,028
No, you stay.
You're not used to a lock-in.
363
00:25:50,120 --> 00:25:52,350
You'll love it.
364
00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:05,636
(Door opening and closing)
365
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:09,795
So you came home to collect Liam?
366
00:26:09,880 --> 00:26:12,155
Liam's in bed.
367
00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:18,714
Liam sleeps with the lights blazing.
368
00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:22,876
All the upstairs lights are off.
369
00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:29,911
- Have l done something wrong?
- No, not...
370
00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:37,192
Five nights out of seven,
Liam ends up in my bed
371
00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:40,555
and that doesn't bother you.
372
00:26:40,640 --> 00:26:43,154
- Not if l'm honest.
- lt wasn't the question.
373
00:26:45,440 --> 00:26:47,829
The night you met me
374
00:26:49,720 --> 00:26:52,439
why didn't you take me back
to your house?
375
00:26:52,520 --> 00:26:54,476
Because yours was nearer.
376
00:26:55,560 --> 00:26:58,950
- And because l don't like mine.
- Sometimes, Stevie...
377
00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:02,715
l can't tell whether
it's me you're interested in
378
00:27:02,800 --> 00:27:04,756
or my family.
379
00:27:06,760 --> 00:27:08,557
What's that supposed to mean?
380
00:27:08,640 --> 00:27:13,156
lt's obvious we need all the help we can
get, so how can we be good for you?
381
00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:19,878
(# Green, Green Grass Of Home)
382
00:27:21,760 --> 00:27:25,070
# The old home town
looks the same, Kev
383
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:29,198
# As l step down from the train
384
00:27:30,800 --> 00:27:34,713
- (Banging)
- # And there to meet me is my mama
385
00:27:35,800 --> 00:27:37,995
# And papa #
386
00:27:38,080 --> 00:27:39,832
You never thought l'd stop.
387
00:27:40,760 --> 00:27:44,309
- (Frank) # Down the road, l walk... #
- Where's Steve?
388
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:46,755
- He shot off a while back.
- With our Fiona.
389
00:27:46,840 --> 00:27:49,912
# Hair of gold and tits like cherries
390
00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:52,956
- # lt's good to touch
- Wait here.
391
00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:58,998
# The green, green grass of home
392
00:28:00,040 --> 00:28:04,636
# Yes, they'll all come to meet me #
393
00:28:04,720 --> 00:28:06,233
Come here, sunshine.
394
00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:09,232
- Do you want a drink, Stan?
- l can't. l'm on overtime.
395
00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:11,356
Soda and a couple of beers for later?
396
00:28:11,440 --> 00:28:14,432
Yeah, great, if l'm not in anybody's way.
397
00:28:14,520 --> 00:28:18,035
# The green, green grass of ho... #
398
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:23,718
Sheila?
399
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:28,112
l know. lf l look to the left or right,
this could be a nightmare
400
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:30,430
but l don't have to. There you are.
401
00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:33,318
l'm absolutely fine, but if l faint
402
00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:36,949
don't shift us.
l'll be right as rain in a few minutes.
403
00:28:37,040 --> 00:28:40,396
- You allowed a drink, Sheila?
- Oh, vodka and tonic for me.
404
00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:43,631
Rum and black for Debbie.
Thanks, sweetheart.
405
00:28:43,720 --> 00:28:45,597
Just a black. And a straw, please.
406
00:28:45,680 --> 00:28:48,035
Everybody looks 10 years older.
407
00:28:49,120 --> 00:28:52,192
- l feel like Woody Allen.
- You look fantastic.
408
00:28:52,280 --> 00:28:54,840
lt's less disorientating if l look at Monica.
409
00:28:54,920 --> 00:28:59,072
She's wearing an outfit l had on
when l last went out.
410
00:28:59,160 --> 00:29:01,151
- (Laughter)
- The bitch!
411
00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:04,869
- Are you sure you should be doing this?
- Absolutely sure.
412
00:29:05,960 --> 00:29:08,315
l need a kiss.
413
00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:17,276
You don't want to overdo it, do you?
414
00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:19,316
You feel a lot safer at home.
415
00:29:20,280 --> 00:29:22,236
l feel alive again, Frank.
416
00:29:24,200 --> 00:29:26,270
l've got a little surprise for you.
417
00:29:41,080 --> 00:29:43,036
(Feedback)
418
00:29:43,120 --> 00:29:45,076
l'm pregnant.
419
00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:47,958
(Whooping)
420
00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:51,715
- (Applause)
- (Man) Well done, Frank.
421
00:29:51,800 --> 00:29:54,109
Can l baby-sit, Dad?
422
00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:05,991
Hey, Frank...
423
00:30:06,080 --> 00:30:08,435
you're officially dead.
424
00:30:09,520 --> 00:30:10,873
l am now.
425
00:30:12,480 --> 00:30:15,074
Yes, l like your family.
426
00:30:15,160 --> 00:30:16,832
l love being here.
427
00:30:16,920 --> 00:30:20,390
Every time l turn up,
l feel more welcome
428
00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:24,712
and treated better than any place
l've ever turned up in my life.
429
00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:26,995
And d-do you know why that is, Fiona?
430
00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:29,833
l'm here because you're here.
431
00:30:29,920 --> 00:30:32,514
l'm here for you.
432
00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:37,752
What do you want? Somebody
who doesn't like where you live?
433
00:30:37,840 --> 00:30:40,673
Somebody
who wants the total opposite?
434
00:30:40,760 --> 00:30:44,389
- No!
- l don't know what l've done wrong!
435
00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:46,357
Nothing, honestly.
436
00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:48,158
Nothing!
437
00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:51,232
l have been dumped on so many times.
438
00:30:51,320 --> 00:30:53,595
Bloody Mum, bloody Dad...
439
00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:55,671
And you are so...
440
00:30:55,760 --> 00:30:58,513
- generous.
- With other people's money.
441
00:30:58,600 --> 00:31:00,397
l'm talking about money.
442
00:31:01,480 --> 00:31:03,516
The way you are with the kids.
443
00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:05,955
The time you spend with 'em.
444
00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:09,749
- They love having you around.
- This is where l'm confused
445
00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:13,071
cos generally,
l think l'm quite a decent bloke.
446
00:31:17,360 --> 00:31:18,793
Plus...
447
00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:21,712
some day soon
448
00:31:22,800 --> 00:31:25,792
l really want to have a family of my own.
449
00:31:27,000 --> 00:31:29,195
l do too.
450
00:31:31,240 --> 00:31:33,754
l hadn't banked on one this big,
but l do too.
451
00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:38,197
Ooh... l definitely wouldn't do that, Fiona.
452
00:31:41,000 --> 00:31:43,309
BMW. 3 Series.
453
00:31:43,400 --> 00:31:45,311
Registration Y586...
454
00:31:45,400 --> 00:31:47,197
BC Y.
455
00:31:47,280 --> 00:31:50,875
Or the Shogun from Leeds. No?
456
00:31:52,240 --> 00:31:56,313
- The black Merc from Didsbury?
- l'm saying nothing till l get a lawyer.
457
00:31:56,400 --> 00:32:00,188
Fine. Say nothing.
We know what nothing means.
458
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:02,316
(Tony) He's a thief.
459
00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:05,472
He's just a ringer.
That's all we've got here.
460
00:32:05,560 --> 00:32:07,630
That's where the money comes from.
461
00:32:07,720 --> 00:32:12,111
Don't listen to a word of this.
lt's all bollocks. l want a lawyer.
462
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:14,760
lt's not ''What Merc?'',
just ''l want a lawyer''.
463
00:32:14,840 --> 00:32:17,035
lt's the surest sign you're right.
464
00:32:18,120 --> 00:32:20,873
How come you're on your own, Tony?
465
00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:25,155
- lt's a favour.
- For?
466
00:32:25,240 --> 00:32:27,879
The last thing l want
is embarrassment for you.
467
00:32:27,960 --> 00:32:29,916
Are you nicking him or not?
468
00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:32,912
- l'll leave that up to you.
- Oh, go on!
469
00:32:34,040 --> 00:32:36,156
- No, l'm saying...
- What, Tony? What?
470
00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:39,915
You let him go and l'm lumbered with
paying back favours to you?
471
00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:44,710
Fuck off. l told you months back that
you weren't my type. What do you do?
472
00:32:44,800 --> 00:32:46,631
- Blackmail?
- No, it's not.
473
00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:48,995
Bloody is, mate.
474
00:32:50,560 --> 00:32:54,314
- You've told him no, but he's still here.
- Only because
475
00:32:54,400 --> 00:32:56,914
l love him.
476
00:33:02,000 --> 00:33:03,672
A bloody car thief?
477
00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:06,354
That's not all he is!
478
00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:28,674
Steven McBride,
479
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:31,957
- l am arresting you on suspicion of theft.
- Oh, no, Tony!
480
00:33:32,040 --> 00:33:35,191
- You do not have to say anything...
- Please, Tony, stop!
481
00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:37,157
(Siren)
482
00:33:45,960 --> 00:33:48,918
(Brakes on hard)
483
00:33:49,000 --> 00:33:51,070
(Doors slamming)
484
00:33:54,760 --> 00:33:58,799
How come it's always people like you
always get their own way?
485
00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:02,111
- You blew that, mate, not me.
- l am not your mate!
486
00:34:03,160 --> 00:34:06,152
lf l take you in,
she won't talk to me again, will she?
487
00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:08,196
No.
488
00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:10,475
What have you got l haven't?
489
00:34:11,560 --> 00:34:13,755
l just got there before you, Tony.
490
00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:21,830
l promised that l'd never let anybody
do that again.
491
00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:33,992
Look, can l smoke?
492
00:34:35,280 --> 00:34:37,077
Do you want to help me out here?
493
00:34:51,880 --> 00:34:53,950
Could get five years for this.
494
00:35:01,840 --> 00:35:03,796
Have you ever driven a 3.5 litre?
495
00:35:04,880 --> 00:35:07,269
- No.
- Give it a try.
496
00:35:08,360 --> 00:35:09,998
Take it for a spin.
497
00:35:12,240 --> 00:35:17,758
Yeah, right. How to keep Tony quiet?
Buy him off. You fuck right off!
498
00:35:17,840 --> 00:35:19,956
- l've got principles.
- Yeah, so have l.
499
00:35:20,040 --> 00:35:23,669
- Huh!
- l've never committed one violent crime.
500
00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:26,320
l've never hurt anyone. l-l...
501
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:28,914
l've never burgled anyone.
l don't need to.
502
00:35:33,800 --> 00:35:35,472
lt's...
503
00:35:35,560 --> 00:35:40,793
lt's a compulsion.
l just like driving other people's cars.
504
00:35:40,880 --> 00:35:43,758
Especially when l know
they're fully comp.
505
00:35:44,840 --> 00:35:46,796
Just imagine it.
506
00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:49,314
You're nipping out for a pint of milk -
507
00:35:49,400 --> 00:35:54,474
something as...mundane, something
as ordinary and boring as that.
508
00:35:56,200 --> 00:35:58,714
You wouldn't believe how sexy that is.
509
00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:02,633
ls it just because...it's not your car?
510
00:36:02,720 --> 00:36:04,392
Precisely that.
511
00:36:05,760 --> 00:36:07,990
And l swear that one
512
00:36:08,080 --> 00:36:10,036
is completely untraceable.
513
00:36:11,120 --> 00:36:13,554
Where would l say l got it?
514
00:36:16,240 --> 00:36:18,390
You bought it from me, in good faith.
515
00:36:18,480 --> 00:36:22,109
You give me a cheque for �15,000,
l'll give you 15 grand back in cash.
516
00:36:44,360 --> 00:36:46,316
(Door slamming)
517
00:36:46,400 --> 00:36:50,313
Mum, can l have some egg, Mum?
Mum, Mum, how l don't like my egg.
518
00:36:50,400 --> 00:36:53,836
lt's all circular, Mum. Mum, Mum, Mum!
519
00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:55,876
(Chorus of competing voices)
520
00:37:00,560 --> 00:37:04,109
- Mum, what about my chips?
- l need a letter for games.
521
00:37:04,200 --> 00:37:07,078
- Mum, there's no ketchup!
- Mum!
522
00:37:07,160 --> 00:37:09,515
(All shouting at once)
523
00:37:09,600 --> 00:37:11,318
Liam!
524
00:37:11,400 --> 00:37:15,154
- He's still at the nursery.
- (Debbie) And it closes at five.
525
00:37:15,240 --> 00:37:17,834
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, Mum...
526
00:37:17,920 --> 00:37:21,549
- At least she came back.
- She didn't. She were forced.
527
00:37:21,640 --> 00:37:25,349
- She's only here cos she can't leave.
- Right, hands up.
528
00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:29,877
Who believes her when she says
she had no idea where we were living?
529
00:37:33,800 --> 00:37:35,916
Time for you to go...Mum.
530
00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:56,633
lf a clairvoyant told me last week
l'd be doing this,
531
00:37:56,720 --> 00:37:59,393
l think l'd have hit her.
532
00:38:00,240 --> 00:38:02,800
- (Doorbell)
- l'll get that!
533
00:38:11,480 --> 00:38:15,473
- Fiona...how are you?
- Sheila, that was fantastic!
534
00:38:15,560 --> 00:38:17,516
And is the other bit true?
535
00:38:17,600 --> 00:38:21,479
Nurse came this morning
with the dates for the antenatal.
536
00:38:21,560 --> 00:38:25,155
- l did it!
- Oh, congratulations!
537
00:38:26,640 --> 00:38:28,471
Give us them flowers, you.
538
00:38:28,560 --> 00:38:32,030
l was gonna ask if you wanted anything
from the supermarket
539
00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:35,078
- but do you fancy coming?
- Oh, my God, Frank.
540
00:38:35,160 --> 00:38:37,116
- l can do me own shopping.
- Good.
541
00:38:37,200 --> 00:38:38,918
Hey, don't go mad though.
542
00:38:39,000 --> 00:38:40,752
Oh, give over. l'm loaded.
543
00:38:40,840 --> 00:38:43,673
l've spent next to nothing
the last five years.
544
00:38:43,760 --> 00:38:46,991
Ooh. Maternity clothes - l love 'em.
545
00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:50,675
Bereavement cards
from people who took it seriously.
546
00:38:51,880 --> 00:38:55,555
''Good luck, kids. One man's loss
can be a game for many.''
547
00:38:55,640 --> 00:38:58,234
- Victor.
- l'll twat him when l see him.
548
00:38:58,320 --> 00:39:00,515
You won't have to
if he thinks you're dead.
549
00:39:00,600 --> 00:39:02,397
(Laughter)
550
00:39:02,480 --> 00:39:04,948
And a death benefit certificate for �25.
551
00:39:05,040 --> 00:39:07,429
- lt'll go towards the funeral.
- (Sheila) How sweet.
552
00:39:07,520 --> 00:39:09,511
lt's in my name.
553
00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:11,875
Ahhh. But l'll sign it over to you
554
00:39:11,960 --> 00:39:15,111
- as it's the last Giro you'll see.
- What you on about?
555
00:39:15,200 --> 00:39:17,714
Well, you can't claim if you're dead, Dad.
556
00:39:17,800 --> 00:39:21,998
(Sheila) Don't be gormless, Frank!
Even l worked that one out.
557
00:39:24,800 --> 00:39:28,076
- Devious fucking bitch!
- What?
558
00:39:28,160 --> 00:39:33,234
The fucking lezzers have done this
to get out of paying maintenance.
559
00:39:33,320 --> 00:39:35,550
But l claim enough for all three of us.
560
00:39:35,640 --> 00:39:39,713
Mum and Norma have settled for 100,
in cash, up front, every week to me.
561
00:39:39,800 --> 00:39:41,995
- Says who?
- Mum and Norma.
562
00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:44,389
Right.
563
00:39:45,680 --> 00:39:47,796
Frank!
564
00:39:57,680 --> 00:40:03,357
# l will find you there
565
00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:09,834
# You don't have to say you love me
just be close at hand
566
00:40:10,920 --> 00:40:17,632
# You don't have to stay forever
l will understand
567
00:40:17,720 --> 00:40:19,199
# Believe... #
568
00:40:19,280 --> 00:40:21,555
You stitched me up, you bitch.
569
00:40:21,640 --> 00:40:24,029
You whores of Satan.
Where's my money?
570
00:40:24,120 --> 00:40:28,557
Calm down, Frank. Everyone got what
they wanted. Nobody stitched anybody.
571
00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:30,790
l can't even claim basic. Basic!
572
00:40:30,880 --> 00:40:33,997
Well, your kids
never saw the money anyway.
573
00:40:34,080 --> 00:40:37,550
- They never saw any from her, did they?
- She was in recovery.
574
00:40:37,640 --> 00:40:39,995
Fuck off. You stitched me.
575
00:40:40,080 --> 00:40:42,036
Hey, hey. That's enough.
576
00:40:42,120 --> 00:40:44,076
No, don't patronise me.
577
00:40:44,160 --> 00:40:46,549
Frank's a pussy, aren't ya?
578
00:40:46,640 --> 00:40:48,915
Mee-oww, mee-oww.
579
00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:50,638
- Say a prayer!
- (Cheering)
580
00:40:51,880 --> 00:40:53,552
Wanker.
581
00:40:55,080 --> 00:40:56,479
Look out!
582
00:40:56,560 --> 00:40:59,518
Oh, Frank! You tosser.
What have you done?
583
00:40:59,600 --> 00:41:01,830
You dickhead.
584
00:41:01,920 --> 00:41:03,990
- Are you all right?
- Yeah?
585
00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:05,354
Well?
586
00:41:05,440 --> 00:41:07,874
And? OK?
587
00:41:07,960 --> 00:41:11,157
OK, come on. You fuck like a bloke.
588
00:41:11,240 --> 00:41:12,992
Come on, fight like one.
589
00:41:23,720 --> 00:41:27,838
You going for a beer? Three beers,
please. You're showing off.
590
00:41:30,160 --> 00:41:33,038
- Which one's yours?
- lt's the one at the end
591
00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:34,951
next to the derelict house.
592
00:41:35,040 --> 00:41:37,395
- Hiya, Sheila.
- Hiya, Steve!
593
00:41:39,040 --> 00:41:40,758
Hiya, Kev. How are you?
594
00:41:42,760 --> 00:41:44,716
- State of me!
- Hiya, gorgeous.
595
00:41:44,800 --> 00:41:50,158
(Sheila) Credit card expired in 2000
so we had to get cash, didn't we?
596
00:41:50,240 --> 00:41:52,390
l loved it!
597
00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:56,712
Sheila, you look about three months
more pregnant than last time.
598
00:41:56,800 --> 00:41:58,756
- lt's a cushion.
- ls it?
599
00:41:58,840 --> 00:42:02,276
l'm testing my smocks.
What do you think?
600
00:42:04,120 --> 00:42:07,669
- God, your shoes are top.
- We got lagers here.
601
00:42:07,760 --> 00:42:11,958
We're just having a break, Fiona,
from fixing Steve's boiler.
602
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:14,031
Fucking slave-driver or what?
603
00:42:14,120 --> 00:42:17,317
Let it be
and give us an hand with the bags.
604
00:42:17,400 --> 00:42:19,356
Here y'are.
605
00:42:19,440 --> 00:42:22,113
Thanks. Come on.
606
00:42:44,400 --> 00:42:46,675
- And you can pack that in for a start.
- What?
607
00:42:46,760 --> 00:42:50,469
- Steve's boiler? He hasn't moved in yet.
- Yes, l have.
608
00:42:50,560 --> 00:42:54,519
l took the liberty of bringing
some clothes and a bit of furniture.
609
00:42:54,600 --> 00:42:56,477
- Ahhhh.
- No, you haven't.
610
00:42:56,560 --> 00:42:58,516
Oh, sorry...
611
00:42:58,600 --> 00:43:01,512
Sorry, you thought l meant your house.
612
00:43:01,600 --> 00:43:03,750
No, you see, l meant ours.
613
00:43:10,920 --> 00:43:12,876
- ls he for real?
- Yep.
614
00:43:12,960 --> 00:43:15,997
- He did a cash deal.
- For more than it's worth, if you ask me.
615
00:43:17,080 --> 00:43:19,355
lt took a month of hard bargaining.
616
00:43:19,440 --> 00:43:23,479
You weren't meant to find out
and that was long before Helmet...
617
00:43:23,560 --> 00:43:26,393
Hey, speak of the bent little devil.
618
00:43:26,480 --> 00:43:29,631
- He-hey! Helmet!
- (Whooping)
619
00:43:34,720 --> 00:43:36,676
- Can l look?
- Oi. Hey.
620
00:43:36,760 --> 00:43:39,672
Look... l haven't finished.
621
00:43:39,760 --> 00:43:41,716
What l want to say...
622
00:43:42,800 --> 00:43:46,395
is, Fiona, from the bottom of my heart,
623
00:43:46,480 --> 00:43:48,596
l love you.
624
00:43:49,680 --> 00:43:51,636
Happy 21 st.
625
00:43:56,360 --> 00:43:58,316
(She splutters)
626
00:44:06,320 --> 00:44:09,198
(Cheering)
627
00:44:10,800 --> 00:44:12,472
Oi, all right!
628
00:44:16,240 --> 00:44:20,199
- l could fit this over your arm.
- Erm, best not, yet.
629
00:44:20,280 --> 00:44:23,556
- lt'll be great in a fortnight.
- Kev reckons it only cost 500.
630
00:44:23,640 --> 00:44:25,596
- That's if you want it.
- You don't have to.
631
00:44:25,680 --> 00:44:29,559
- l can be in charge next door.
- Yeah, that'd be top.
632
00:44:29,640 --> 00:44:34,031
A couple of hands to do it up.
That'll come off the insurance claim.
633
00:44:34,120 --> 00:44:36,429
What insurance claim?
634
00:44:37,640 --> 00:44:39,551
Oh, fucking hell!
635
00:44:46,040 --> 00:44:49,157
(Whooping and cheering)
636
00:44:58,800 --> 00:45:02,429
- That'd be your boiler, then, Steve?
- Seems like it, Kev.
637
00:45:02,520 --> 00:45:06,149
Wouldn't you know it?
British workmanship. Whoo-hoo!
638
00:45:09,320 --> 00:45:10,992
Come here.
639
00:45:11,080 --> 00:45:12,308
(Screams)
640
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:20,593
(Frank) 'That's why Tony Blair's a no-no.
641
00:45:21,480 --> 00:45:25,029
'Forget lraq. Never mind pensions.
642
00:45:25,120 --> 00:45:29,796
'All that gimp's achieved is making
lesbians think they own the place
643
00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:35,273
'while working class heroes like me are
left propping the bleeding country up.
644
00:45:35,360 --> 00:45:37,032
'Well, fuck him!
645
00:45:40,240 --> 00:45:42,993
'Actually, don't, l bet he'd love it.'
646
00:46:25,920 --> 00:46:27,876
(TV is on)
647
00:46:34,560 --> 00:46:36,312
(Frank whistling)
648
00:46:38,360 --> 00:46:41,352
(Sheila) You'll have to wait,
you dirty boy.
649
00:46:41,440 --> 00:46:44,512
l promised to go and see my mam
before she died.
650
00:46:44,600 --> 00:46:46,556
- (Horn)
- There's me taxi.
651
00:46:47,405 --> 00:46:53,550
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