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1
00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:37,580
This is the story of a
couple madly in love.
2
00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:40,958
So mad, they drove
each other crazy.
3
00:00:41,041 --> 00:00:43,544
- Oh, fuck you, Travis Maddox.
- Fuck you!
4
00:00:44,211 --> 00:00:47,381
{\an8}You know, for someone who
claims they're not a toxic male,
5
00:00:47,465 --> 00:00:48,716
{\an8}you don't do a very good job.
6
00:00:48,799 --> 00:00:50,050
{\an8}Oh, waah!
7
00:00:50,134 --> 00:00:54,096
Another ten point loss for Travis
in Abby's stupid married contest.
8
00:00:54,180 --> 00:00:57,558
Aw, don't worry. You lost that
contest a very long time ago.
9
00:00:57,641 --> 00:01:00,269
Oh, really? Did you give
yourself a ten point reduction
10
00:01:00,352 --> 00:01:02,855
when you ran with your
titties out on a public beach?
11
00:01:02,938 --> 00:01:04,523
Or how about this morning?
12
00:01:04,607 --> 00:01:07,651
Was your boyfriend surprised to
see the carpets match the drapes?
13
00:01:07,735 --> 00:01:08,611
Silence!
14
00:01:08,694 --> 00:01:10,362
I'm sorry, Sister Bertrille.
15
00:01:12,823 --> 00:01:14,943
You gonna let Mother Teresa
push you around like that?
16
00:01:15,201 --> 00:01:19,872
Por favor. Let's start from the
beginning. Tell me how you fell in love.
17
00:01:22,166 --> 00:01:25,127
Well, it all started
at the Circle.
18
00:01:26,045 --> 00:01:29,256
It's this underground fight
club I'm a pretty big deal at.
19
00:01:29,340 --> 00:01:31,634
Oh, the ego on you.
20
00:01:32,718 --> 00:01:35,846
From the moment I saw her, I
couldn't take my eyes off of her,
21
00:01:35,930 --> 00:01:38,933
which was a mistake, because
I was fighting somebody.
22
00:01:39,016 --> 00:01:41,352
Then I caught her
Insta-stalking me,
23
00:01:41,435 --> 00:01:44,188
which was creepy, if
she wasn't so adorable.
24
00:01:44,271 --> 00:01:48,108
I was not Insta-stalking.
Okay, maybe I was.
25
00:01:48,192 --> 00:01:50,486
But he was all I
could think about.
26
00:01:51,278 --> 00:01:56,075
Then we went on this really romantic
date and I knew she was the one.
27
00:01:56,158 --> 00:01:58,828
Yeah, but I thought
he was a total player.
28
00:01:58,911 --> 00:02:02,414
He had a drawer full of
sex toys and condoms.
29
00:02:02,498 --> 00:02:03,767
So I made a bet with her,
30
00:02:03,791 --> 00:02:07,711
and if I won, she'd have to be my
roommate for a month, platonically.
31
00:02:07,795 --> 00:02:08,921
Wall of China.
32
00:02:09,004 --> 00:02:13,175
I lost the bet. And yeah,
he was charming, but crazy.
33
00:02:13,259 --> 00:02:15,135
And I didn't wanna date crazy.
34
00:02:15,219 --> 00:02:18,639
I wanted a nice, normal
guy like Parker Hayes.
35
00:02:18,722 --> 00:02:20,808
Oh, God!
36
00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:22,911
- Who he terrorized.
- Why are you bringing that up?
37
00:02:22,935 --> 00:02:25,271
- Because that's what happened.
- Okay, Miss Honesty.
38
00:02:25,354 --> 00:02:27,714
Why don't we talk about your
morning flogging of the bishop?
39
00:02:27,773 --> 00:02:30,067
- Bishop Gomez?
- No, it's a euphemism.
40
00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:32,470
- She was giving me a hand job.
- This is not a confession.
41
00:02:32,528 --> 00:02:35,155
- He's a priest!
- And you're an asshole!
42
00:02:35,239 --> 00:02:39,493
Anyhow, against my better judgment,
I fell madly in love with him.
43
00:02:39,577 --> 00:02:41,620
He even took me home
to meet his brothers.
44
00:02:41,704 --> 00:02:43,622
And just as everything
was going great,
45
00:02:43,706 --> 00:02:46,417
I get abducted by this
Vegas gangster Benny
46
00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:48,460
because I happen to
be very good at poker.
47
00:02:48,544 --> 00:02:52,590
- And then I saved her.- And then I saved him.
48
00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:54,967
And then we found
her stolen money,
49
00:02:55,050 --> 00:02:58,345
ran away from the bad guys,
and lived happily ever after.
50
00:02:58,429 --> 00:03:03,225
Except we're not happily, I mean
happy, which is why we're here.
51
00:03:03,309 --> 00:03:07,146
Okay, um, why don't we start
at "happily ever after"?
52
00:03:07,229 --> 00:03:09,815
Was that your wedding night?
53
00:03:09,899 --> 00:03:11,025
Uh...
54
00:03:11,108 --> 00:03:14,403
- That's a little unclear.
- Yeah. We were fucked up.
55
00:03:14,486 --> 00:03:17,531
Okay, how about we start six
days ago? When we woke up.
56
00:03:17,615 --> 00:03:19,825
That might be helpful.
57
00:03:35,966 --> 00:03:38,302
♪ What can I do... ♪
58
00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:40,137
I never wanna leave
this bed, pigeon.
59
00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:42,765
♪ Oh, I love you... ♪
60
00:03:43,849 --> 00:03:47,061
♪ And what can I say... ♪
61
00:03:47,770 --> 00:03:49,355
Oh, baby.
62
00:03:50,064 --> 00:03:51,482
Mmm.
63
00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:53,317
- Yeah, babe.
- Shep?
64
00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:55,027
I know what you want, baby.
65
00:03:55,110 --> 00:03:59,573
You want the... the magic
Maddox fingers, don't you?
66
00:03:59,657 --> 00:04:03,410
Ooh, tickle, tickle.
67
00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:10,793
You're not Mare.
68
00:04:10,876 --> 00:04:12,711
Mare has brown eyes.
69
00:04:13,545 --> 00:04:16,382
- What are you guys doing?
- Nothing.
70
00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:19,843
- Where's Mare?
- Mare?
71
00:04:19,927 --> 00:04:22,304
- Yeah.
- Where is Mare?
72
00:04:22,388 --> 00:04:23,764
I don't know.
73
00:04:23,847 --> 00:04:28,227
- Mare... Pumpkin, where are you?
- What the fuck happened last night?
74
00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:31,855
- What the hell happened last night?
- I... I don't know. I don't know.
75
00:04:31,939 --> 00:04:34,274
- Whoa.
- Where did all this money come from?
76
00:04:34,358 --> 00:04:38,612
- Benny.
- No. This is Benny's money right here.
77
00:04:38,696 --> 00:04:42,199
- I'm confused.
- Oh, I think I went gambling last night.
78
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:43,867
Oh, my God, what is going on?
79
00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:49,081
Oh, guys, hey, we're on TV.
80
00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:50,958
Oh, my God.
81
00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:53,210
- I guess you won?
- Good work.
82
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:55,045
- So we all split it?
- Lucky 13.
83
00:04:55,129 --> 00:04:57,357
- There you go, camera.
- I have no memory of that!
84
00:04:57,381 --> 00:04:59,925
I don't remember that.
I wonder what we sang?
85
00:05:00,009 --> 00:05:04,388
- Pumpkin, you took care of me.
- Yeah, 'cause I love you.
86
00:05:05,973 --> 00:05:08,225
- Oh, babe.
- Yeah.
87
00:05:09,101 --> 00:05:10,728
- I fingered Travis.
- What?
88
00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:11,979
- What?
- What?
89
00:05:12,062 --> 00:05:13,063
What?
90
00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:15,482
What?
91
00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:17,985
That's not real.
92
00:05:19,111 --> 00:05:22,364
- I wouldn't do that.
- It looks pretty real.
93
00:05:25,451 --> 00:05:28,203
Oh, shit. Guys, look...
look at the screen.
94
00:05:29,121 --> 00:05:30,497
That's not real.
95
00:05:30,581 --> 00:05:34,334
- That's just us goofing around, right?
- That's... That's funny.
96
00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:37,629
Oh, shit.
97
00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:41,592
- Oh, my God.
- Okay. Okay, Abby.
98
00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:43,028
- We got married last night?
- It's okay.
99
00:05:43,052 --> 00:05:44,678
- Look at me.
- Oh, my God.
100
00:05:44,762 --> 00:05:47,473
This probably isn't an ideal
way to do this, but I love you,
101
00:05:47,556 --> 00:05:49,850
I really do love you, and I
wish that my family was here
102
00:05:49,933 --> 00:05:51,894
to see you and me like this.
103
00:05:51,977 --> 00:05:53,187
I love you...
104
00:06:03,822 --> 00:06:06,658
- Oh, Abby.
- That's not what we needed.
105
00:06:06,742 --> 00:06:08,261
Well, hey, listen,
on the bright side,
106
00:06:08,285 --> 00:06:12,581
I thought that... I thought
that speech was very romantic.
107
00:06:16,877 --> 00:06:18,837
Hello.
108
00:06:18,921 --> 00:06:23,175
Hi, this is at the front desk with a
reminder that checkout was an hour ago,
109
00:06:23,258 --> 00:06:27,971
so there's gonna be a
surcharge of about $180,000.
110
00:06:28,055 --> 00:06:30,307
- You fucking ass-clowns.
- What?
111
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,935
- Wait, is that Benny?
- Benny?
112
00:06:33,018 --> 00:06:34,603
- Who's Benny?
- Benny?
113
00:06:34,686 --> 00:06:37,165
- No, no, no, I got this. Don't worry.
- No, I got this. Benny?
114
00:06:37,189 --> 00:06:40,734
What is it with your generation
and the utter lack of manners?
115
00:06:40,818 --> 00:06:42,736
There's no "good
morning, how's your day"?
116
00:06:42,820 --> 00:06:45,531
Look, I know all about the con
that you and my dad and Jesse
117
00:06:45,614 --> 00:06:47,324
tried to screw me
over with, okay?
118
00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:49,284
Yeah, that's ancient history.
119
00:06:49,368 --> 00:06:54,039
This is about Travis assuming your
debt by fighting against Chernobyl.
120
00:06:54,123 --> 00:06:57,751
- Money that I did not get back.
- I have it. I'm hanging up on you.
121
00:06:57,835 --> 00:07:01,964
Well, I can see who wears the
balls in this relationship.
122
00:07:02,339 --> 00:07:05,050
I wanna see the two of you
in my office in an hour.
123
00:07:05,134 --> 00:07:08,178
And don't you even
think of skipping town.
124
00:07:08,262 --> 00:07:11,098
- Buh-bye.
- At least let me...
125
00:07:11,181 --> 00:07:17,181
Come on, pool, let's go. Fucking
look at me like that. Let's go. Damn!
126
00:07:17,271 --> 00:07:18,981
- He's bluffing.
- Yeah.
127
00:07:30,325 --> 00:07:31,493
Gun!
128
00:07:33,579 --> 00:07:36,331
Get him! Get him, get
him! Baby, get him!
129
00:07:40,085 --> 00:07:42,880
- Good job, baby.
- Get in there, man!
130
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:45,382
- I'm proud of you.
- Did you just fucking kick my cousin?
131
00:07:47,384 --> 00:07:50,137
- He's down. It's okay.
- Something to cool down with.
132
00:07:50,596 --> 00:07:53,515
- Oh, God. Oh, my God. Guys.
- No, no. Guys.
133
00:07:53,599 --> 00:07:55,142
- Yeah.
- Oh, yeah.
134
00:07:55,225 --> 00:07:56,810
You like that?
135
00:07:56,894 --> 00:07:59,146
- You thirsty?
- You thirsty? Okay. Drink up!
136
00:07:59,229 --> 00:08:00,939
- There you go.
- Guys?
137
00:08:01,023 --> 00:08:02,774
- Almost done.
- Hold on.
138
00:08:02,858 --> 00:08:05,235
Guys!
139
00:08:05,319 --> 00:08:06,320
Oops.
140
00:08:07,738 --> 00:08:08,738
Hello?
141
00:08:10,115 --> 00:08:11,115
Anyone home?
142
00:08:11,742 --> 00:08:14,161
- Jerry?
- Attention!
143
00:08:19,249 --> 00:08:21,001
Jerry won't be joining us.
144
00:08:21,627 --> 00:08:23,337
Stupid son of a bitch
did that keto thing
145
00:08:23,420 --> 00:08:26,173
and is now pissing kidney
stones the size of leema beans.
146
00:08:26,256 --> 00:08:27,257
- Lima.
- Huh?
147
00:08:27,341 --> 00:08:30,010
- And you are?
- Chief Warrant Officer Delroy Murphy.
148
00:08:30,093 --> 00:08:34,097
But my friends and
enemies call me Buzz.
149
00:08:36,266 --> 00:08:37,643
Hi, Buzz.
150
00:08:39,478 --> 00:08:43,023
Lady Hawk and I will be
flying you down to Méjico.
151
00:08:43,106 --> 00:08:46,568
- That thing can't fly to Mexico.
- Don't tell me my business, sweet peach.
152
00:08:46,652 --> 00:08:49,529
Lady Hawk has been
retrofitted and modified!
153
00:08:50,614 --> 00:08:53,700
- The Millennium fucking Falcon.
- Oh! Star Wars!
154
00:08:56,078 --> 00:09:01,166
I'll take you down to Méjico.
No passports, no questions.
155
00:09:01,625 --> 00:09:05,212
The whole enchilada
for ten grand.
156
00:09:05,295 --> 00:09:07,506
- Wow, that's pretty...
- We'll take it.
157
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:10,217
What, like we have a choice?
158
00:09:11,927 --> 00:09:14,554
Here. Here's 5K now.
159
00:09:14,638 --> 00:09:17,599
And then I'll give you the rest
when we make it there in one piece.
160
00:09:18,141 --> 00:09:19,452
- I like your style.
- What about getting back?
161
00:09:19,476 --> 00:09:21,478
That's not my problem, Slotty.
162
00:09:25,691 --> 00:09:29,903
Okay, um, you guys have fun with,
uh, Lando Calrissian and his macho...
163
00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:46,295
Roger!
164
00:09:47,337 --> 00:09:50,549
Whoa! This is so cool!
Wireless headsets.
165
00:09:51,383 --> 00:09:54,970
- Hey, Buzz, you got Spotify on this?
- You want an ass-whippin'?
166
00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:57,389
I'm gonna be, uh,
really honest right now.
167
00:09:57,472 --> 00:10:00,017
This whole, uh, Vegas gangster
168
00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:03,270
combined with fleeing to
Mexico got me really on edge.
169
00:10:03,353 --> 00:10:06,315
So... And I'm assuming that no
one has any Xanax or alcohol.
170
00:10:06,398 --> 00:10:09,568
- So I'm gonna need you...
- Oh, babe.
171
00:10:09,651 --> 00:10:11,611
- To follow me...
- My sternum.
172
00:10:11,695 --> 00:10:16,533
Into whatever the fuck that thing
is and send me into a dopamine coma.
173
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:17,784
Okay.
174
00:10:19,536 --> 00:10:23,749
Hello, mile high
club. So... Oh...
175
00:10:23,832 --> 00:10:26,001
- We're gonna have so much fun.
- This is fun.
176
00:10:26,084 --> 00:10:27,377
- Yeah.
- This is fun.
177
00:10:34,384 --> 00:10:38,180
A hundred and thirty-eight thousand,
seven hundred and ninety-eight dollars.
178
00:10:38,263 --> 00:10:39,264
Damn!
179
00:10:41,224 --> 00:10:44,102
- What you doing?
- I am texting Sancho.
180
00:10:44,186 --> 00:10:45,354
Who's Sancho?
181
00:10:45,437 --> 00:10:49,649
He is the concierge at a luxury villa
in Gatito, Mexico, that I just booked.
182
00:10:49,733 --> 00:10:51,777
Sounds out of our price range.
183
00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:55,113
- You just said that we have $138,000.
- Yeah, but I...
184
00:10:55,197 --> 00:10:57,199
- And it's my honeymoon.
- Well, sure.
185
00:10:57,282 --> 00:10:58,533
It's my honeymoon.
186
00:11:00,535 --> 00:11:01,995
- Hey, Buzz?
- Yeah?
187
00:11:02,079 --> 00:11:04,748
- We're going to Gatito, Mexico.
- Copy that.
188
00:11:04,831 --> 00:11:07,292
- Thanks.
- Happy wife, happy life.
189
00:11:07,376 --> 00:11:09,836
Oh, yeah, that
is... that is true.
190
00:11:14,716 --> 00:11:16,134
Happy wife, happy life.
191
00:11:17,844 --> 00:11:20,931
- Oh, come on.
- What?
192
00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:24,184
You can't tell me that you're
not freaking out about this.
193
00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:31,817
Travis, we're married. That means
that you're stuck with me forever.
194
00:11:31,900 --> 00:11:34,986
Well, I have had
some reservations.
195
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:38,782
Like the fact that
you're beautiful, smart,
196
00:11:38,865 --> 00:11:40,784
can make us a fortune
in less than an hour.
197
00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:45,080
But I will never, ever
find anyone like you.
198
00:11:46,998 --> 00:11:48,750
Love you so much.
199
00:12:10,564 --> 00:12:12,482
Rise and shine, sleepyheads.
200
00:12:12,566 --> 00:12:15,735
We have arrived at your
destination. Méjico.
201
00:12:17,904 --> 00:12:22,534
Open the door and get some air.
Take in the view. Don't jump.
202
00:12:31,751 --> 00:12:33,920
The plane, the plane!
203
00:12:34,379 --> 00:12:37,466
It's much smaller, my
love. It's a helicopter.
204
00:12:42,429 --> 00:12:44,931
If you get into trouble,
you know where to find me.
205
00:12:45,015 --> 00:12:47,434
I also do hostage and
rescue situations.
206
00:12:47,517 --> 00:12:48,685
Thanks.
207
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:53,106
Well, you're a man of your word,
Buzz, so, here you go. Thank you.
208
00:12:58,069 --> 00:13:00,655
Hey, honey, I think
it's this way.
209
00:13:07,996 --> 00:13:12,959
♪ My name is Sancho ♪
210
00:13:13,043 --> 00:13:14,794
♪ And I want to welcome you ♪
211
00:13:14,878 --> 00:13:17,964
♪ To Casa Suave ♪
212
00:13:18,048 --> 00:13:22,344
♪ Arriba! Arriba!
Arriba! Arriba! ♪
213
00:13:22,427 --> 00:13:26,056
- Hola! Señor y Señora Maddox!
- Gracias!
214
00:13:26,139 --> 00:13:32,139
And your best friends, Mr. Shepley
and Miss United States.
215
00:13:32,604 --> 00:13:34,856
Oh, no, America.
216
00:13:34,940 --> 00:13:36,167
My name is America.
217
00:13:36,191 --> 00:13:39,110
America! Home of the brave!
218
00:13:39,194 --> 00:13:41,488
- Hello, Mrs. Maddox.
- Hola!
219
00:13:41,571 --> 00:13:43,740
Hello, United States.
220
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:47,702
Okay, okay, okay. So much
to do and so little time.
221
00:13:52,123 --> 00:13:53,291
Don't touch me.
222
00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:09,516
Okay, welcome! Bienvenidos!
223
00:14:09,599 --> 00:14:14,145
This is the room of living.
224
00:14:14,229 --> 00:14:16,356
Here, we have everything.
225
00:14:16,439 --> 00:14:19,192
If you have no clothes,
I will give you clothes.
226
00:14:19,276 --> 00:14:20,360
Do you have ESPN?
227
00:14:20,443 --> 00:14:22,755
Because the Sacramento Kings
are in the NBA finals tonight,
228
00:14:22,779 --> 00:14:24,447
and I've waited my
whole life for this.
229
00:14:24,531 --> 00:14:26,074
ESPN, yes!
230
00:14:26,157 --> 00:14:28,785
Yes! SUV, DUJ.
231
00:14:28,868 --> 00:14:30,579
We have everything.
232
00:14:31,496 --> 00:14:34,457
Right, but do you have ESPN?
233
00:14:34,541 --> 00:14:40,338
♪ I make dreams come true! ♪
234
00:14:40,797 --> 00:14:44,926
Look, my friend,
blondie, you don't worry.
235
00:14:45,010 --> 00:14:47,929
We have it, we have
it, we have it!
236
00:14:48,013 --> 00:14:50,265
Come on! Come,
come, come with me.
237
00:14:50,348 --> 00:14:52,601
Come, come, come, come, come.
238
00:14:52,684 --> 00:14:54,853
♪ Come, come, come, come, come ♪
239
00:14:54,936 --> 00:14:59,107
Señor Shepley y
Señorita Estados Unidos.
240
00:14:59,190 --> 00:15:01,776
-♪ That's not my name ♪
- Come, come, come.
241
00:15:01,860 --> 00:15:03,320
Un momento.
242
00:15:04,279 --> 00:15:05,464
Oh, he said to wait.
243
00:15:05,488 --> 00:15:08,491
Yeah, that's not
happening, Señora Maddox.
244
00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:11,369
Who says I'm taking
Señora Maddox?
245
00:15:12,495 --> 00:15:15,373
I like my name. Abby
Abernathy is a great name.
246
00:15:15,457 --> 00:15:16,958
It has a really good flow to it.
247
00:15:17,042 --> 00:15:21,588
Oh, but Travis Abernathy?
You could be trendsetting.
248
00:15:21,671 --> 00:15:25,842
- You wanna castrate me too?
- No.
249
00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,677
- Hey, wait!
- What?
250
00:15:28,970 --> 00:15:31,473
You almost just
crossed the threshold.
251
00:15:32,307 --> 00:15:33,642
Oh!
252
00:15:33,725 --> 00:15:35,244
- It's bad luck, you know.
- Oh, my God.
253
00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:37,604
You know we Maddoxes have our
own form of this tradition?
254
00:15:37,687 --> 00:15:39,439
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
255
00:15:39,522 --> 00:15:43,109
Well, this isn't too
barbaric. Oh, my God.
256
00:15:43,193 --> 00:15:46,363
- Horny.
- Oh, my God! This is so cute.
257
00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:48,448
- Yeah!
- Look, look, look! It has our initials!
258
00:15:48,531 --> 00:15:52,535
Wait. Hold on. Wait, wait, wait. I wanna
get a photo. I wanna get a photo. Okay.
259
00:15:52,619 --> 00:15:54,621
- No, I want you to hold me for the photo.
- Okay.
260
00:15:54,704 --> 00:15:56,623
- Lift me up.
- Lifting.
261
00:15:56,706 --> 00:15:59,334
- Smile.
- Okay. Okay, okay.
262
00:15:59,417 --> 00:16:01,878
Okay. Now get one
of me on the bed.
263
00:16:04,923 --> 00:16:08,677
No, actually, will you hold it
lower? And then will you flip it?
264
00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:10,261
- You like it?
- I like it, yeah.
265
00:16:10,345 --> 00:16:12,055
Will you do one more
flipped the other way?
266
00:16:12,138 --> 00:16:13,973
- Got it. I got it, I got it.
- Got it?
267
00:16:14,057 --> 00:16:15,892
- Okay, do you want one on the bed?
- No.
268
00:16:17,519 --> 00:16:20,397
No, but it was so cute
with our initials on it.
269
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:24,275
T and A. It stands for titty and
ass, 'cause you got the best.
270
00:16:24,359 --> 00:16:25,610
Oh!
271
00:16:26,736 --> 00:16:28,947
You are such a neanderthal.
272
00:16:29,030 --> 00:16:31,616
Ooo-gah. Ooo-gah.
273
00:16:32,450 --> 00:16:33,702
- Ooh.
- Ooh-gah?
274
00:16:33,785 --> 00:16:35,745
Ooo-gah hate this pillow.
275
00:16:35,829 --> 00:16:37,789
Does Ooo-gah wanna
consummate this marriage?
276
00:16:37,872 --> 00:16:39,791
- Ooo-gah wanna fuck.
- Yeah?
277
00:16:39,874 --> 00:16:42,419
Ooo-gah. Ooo-gah.
278
00:16:55,473 --> 00:16:56,349
Adios!
279
00:16:56,433 --> 00:16:57,934
- No, thank you.
- No, thank you!
280
00:16:58,017 --> 00:16:59,936
- No, gracias!
- No, thank you.
281
00:17:00,019 --> 00:17:04,399
Thank you. No, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no.
282
00:17:06,693 --> 00:17:10,029
I don't know about you, but hearing a
traditional Mexican song about a cockroach
283
00:17:10,113 --> 00:17:11,865
really gets me in the mood.
284
00:17:11,948 --> 00:17:14,826
Here. How about this?
285
00:17:14,909 --> 00:17:17,245
Thank you. Much better.
286
00:17:18,288 --> 00:17:19,998
- Where were we?
- Come here.
287
00:17:28,757 --> 00:17:30,008
Condoms...
288
00:17:31,176 --> 00:17:33,136
Shit.
289
00:17:33,219 --> 00:17:36,055
Is this the only
protection we have?
290
00:17:36,639 --> 00:17:39,809
- I didn't bring any. Did you?
- No.
291
00:17:39,893 --> 00:17:43,563
Wait a minute. We don't need
protection. We're married.
292
00:17:43,646 --> 00:17:46,191
Easy, Dracula.
293
00:17:46,274 --> 00:17:49,319
I'm too young to be married,
let alone have a kid.
294
00:17:50,945 --> 00:17:54,741
- We can pull out.
- No.
295
00:17:54,824 --> 00:17:57,660
I have complete control over
my seminal fluid emission.
296
00:17:57,744 --> 00:18:02,165
That's a cliché that's caused, like,
thousands of unwanted pregnancies.
297
00:18:04,751 --> 00:18:08,338
We could do other things.
Other things like...
298
00:18:11,341 --> 00:18:12,341
this.
299
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:15,720
That's interesting.
300
00:18:16,513 --> 00:18:21,643
I was thinking other
things like... this.
301
00:18:23,228 --> 00:18:26,773
Ooh. That's interesting.
302
00:18:27,857 --> 00:18:29,859
Yeah, this is good.
303
00:18:31,402 --> 00:18:32,821
This is better, actually.
304
00:18:33,738 --> 00:18:36,157
- This is fun.
- This is fun.
305
00:18:36,241 --> 00:18:39,202
- I'm glad we're doing this.
- Yeah, right? I'm glad we're doing this.
306
00:18:39,285 --> 00:18:42,330
- We should really do it more often.
- I agree. No, this is great.
307
00:18:42,413 --> 00:18:45,625
- Those are my balls.
- Mm-hmm.
308
00:18:45,708 --> 00:18:47,794
- It's cool.
- A little faster?
309
00:18:47,877 --> 00:18:52,298
Yeah, let's go really fast right
now. Let's kick this up a notch.
310
00:18:54,425 --> 00:18:57,178
Are you satisfied?
I'm satisfied.
311
00:18:59,013 --> 00:19:00,807
- No.
- Come here.
312
00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:02,767
- Okay.
- Okay.
313
00:19:04,477 --> 00:19:05,854
Get 'em off. Get 'em off.
314
00:19:10,608 --> 00:19:12,819
- We're gonna be safe, right?
- Yeah.
315
00:19:12,902 --> 00:19:15,196
- You're not gonna get a drop!
- I promise.
316
00:19:15,280 --> 00:19:17,115
- Got it?
- Mm-hmm.
317
00:19:22,203 --> 00:19:24,789
- Just an inch.
- An inch.
318
00:19:24,873 --> 00:19:27,166
- Just an inch.
- An inch.
319
00:19:27,250 --> 00:19:29,252
Hey!
320
00:19:31,170 --> 00:19:32,672
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
321
00:19:32,755 --> 00:19:35,133
It's a nice inch.
322
00:19:36,050 --> 00:19:37,969
- Maybe like a little...
- Another inch?
323
00:19:38,052 --> 00:19:40,847
A little bit more. Like another
inch? Yeah, okay, another inch.
324
00:19:40,930 --> 00:19:42,390
- Whoo.
- Another inch.
325
00:19:42,473 --> 00:19:43,474
Another inch.
326
00:19:44,642 --> 00:19:47,645
Yeah, but... maybe like a...
327
00:19:48,479 --> 00:19:51,733
- You're gonna have to be more clear.
- Maybe just...
328
00:19:51,816 --> 00:19:52,859
I don't under...
329
00:19:52,942 --> 00:19:55,236
Whoa.
330
00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:57,280
Oh. Whoa.
331
00:19:57,363 --> 00:19:58,865
- Ah.
- Whoa.
332
00:19:58,948 --> 00:20:00,491
- Now, that's in.
- Yeah. Ah.
333
00:20:00,575 --> 00:20:04,329
That feels way better without the
rubber. Yeah, like, whoa. Okay.
334
00:20:05,371 --> 00:20:07,916
Oh. Oh! Whoa.
335
00:20:09,167 --> 00:20:13,338
- Babe, you're blocking my escape hatch.
- Oh, I'm so close.
336
00:20:13,421 --> 00:20:17,091
Well, I know, but so am I.
That's why this is a problem.
337
00:20:17,175 --> 00:20:19,052
- Oh, goddammit!
- Oh!
338
00:20:22,347 --> 00:20:24,599
- Go get me a condom, like, now!
- Where?
339
00:20:24,682 --> 00:20:26,809
It's not like there's a
CVS across the street.
340
00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:28,895
I don't know. Shep.
Shepley must have condoms.
341
00:20:28,978 --> 00:20:30,605
Okay, fine, I'm going!
342
00:20:37,153 --> 00:20:39,030
Sorpresa!
343
00:20:39,113 --> 00:20:40,198
Hola!
344
00:20:40,281 --> 00:20:43,409
No, no, don't touch the pillow.
345
00:20:43,493 --> 00:20:44,494
Uh...
346
00:20:48,915 --> 00:20:52,418
Hey, Travis. You got any con...
You got any condoms on you?
347
00:20:52,502 --> 00:20:55,254
'Cause I... 'Cause I ran out.
348
00:21:12,814 --> 00:21:15,024
Buenas noches, Señor Maddox.
349
00:21:15,108 --> 00:21:16,526
Buenas noches.
350
00:21:16,609 --> 00:21:18,903
- You look like a man in love.
- Thank you.
351
00:21:18,987 --> 00:21:21,364
- A man's man in love.
- Thanks.
352
00:21:21,447 --> 00:21:23,992
- A man's man... man...
- Where's my wife?
353
00:21:26,035 --> 00:21:27,412
She's ready.
354
00:21:30,331 --> 00:21:32,417
- Ta-da!
- Wow.
355
00:21:32,500 --> 00:21:34,961
- You look amazing.
- Thank you.
356
00:21:36,504 --> 00:21:37,547
So do you.
357
00:21:38,673 --> 00:21:41,175
Your dinner is ready.
358
00:21:42,051 --> 00:21:43,344
Por favor.
359
00:21:49,976 --> 00:21:53,312
- Wow. Look at this.
- This is beautiful.
360
00:21:53,396 --> 00:21:54,772
Thank you.
361
00:21:56,232 --> 00:21:58,359
Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh.
362
00:21:59,569 --> 00:22:01,404
Sit. There you go.
363
00:22:01,487 --> 00:22:02,363
There you go.
364
00:22:02,447 --> 00:22:04,073
Very good. Very good.
365
00:22:04,157 --> 00:22:10,157
Now, Pino has prepared a
traditional seven-course meal
366
00:22:11,205 --> 00:22:13,291
for newlyweds especially.
367
00:22:13,374 --> 00:22:17,211
- Thank you.
- Okay. Enjoy. Huh.
368
00:22:19,088 --> 00:22:20,506
Pino?
369
00:22:21,090 --> 00:22:24,177
Well, here's to us.
370
00:22:24,260 --> 00:22:25,970
And happily ever after.
371
00:22:26,054 --> 00:22:28,306
- I love you, pigeon.
- I love you too.
372
00:22:34,896 --> 00:22:36,981
So, I, uh, I made this.
373
00:22:37,065 --> 00:22:39,609
- I didn't know we were doing gifts.
- Yeah.
374
00:22:39,692 --> 00:22:42,862
It's just a little something I made
on the flight while you were sleeping.
375
00:22:43,780 --> 00:22:46,699
- Travis, I love you so much.
- I love you too.
376
00:22:48,117 --> 00:22:50,620
- What is it?
- It's a pro/con list.
377
00:22:50,703 --> 00:22:54,040
- To see if we should stay married or...
- Or...?
378
00:22:54,123 --> 00:22:56,542
Or we get a quick annulment.
379
00:22:57,585 --> 00:23:00,046
Whoopsies. What happened?
380
00:23:00,129 --> 00:23:01,923
Why is it so decorated?
381
00:23:02,006 --> 00:23:04,550
I thought that maybe if you saw
how much effort I put into it
382
00:23:04,634 --> 00:23:06,969
you would... you'd
maybe like it.
383
00:23:07,053 --> 00:23:11,057
I don't like it. This is like
getting cancer news framed.
384
00:23:11,140 --> 00:23:12,225
This is a pro/con list.
385
00:23:12,308 --> 00:23:14,977
Just to help us gain some
clarity, only while we're here.
386
00:23:15,061 --> 00:23:19,732
And, look, I even gave us a 30-point head
start because you have the biggest dick.
387
00:23:19,816 --> 00:23:22,652
- Who's got a big dick?
- This guy.
388
00:23:23,277 --> 00:23:26,072
I knew it! I knew it! I knew it!
389
00:23:26,155 --> 00:23:30,368
That is why you are
so self-confident.
390
00:23:30,451 --> 00:23:35,623
I knew a powerful
and successful man
391
00:23:35,706 --> 00:23:38,668
who, alas, had a small dick...
392
00:23:38,751 --> 00:23:41,021
I'll agree to this if you get
him to stop talking about it.
393
00:23:41,045 --> 00:23:43,714
Deal. Sancho, what is this?
394
00:23:43,798 --> 00:23:47,760
Soup. That is soup. That
is the first course. Yes.
395
00:23:47,844 --> 00:23:49,004
Enjoy your meal.
396
00:23:49,053 --> 00:23:50,847
I shall be back.
397
00:23:55,351 --> 00:23:57,353
Yum.
398
00:23:57,436 --> 00:24:01,691
Mmm. This is amazing.
399
00:24:02,900 --> 00:24:06,445
You know, this reminds me of this
one time when I was really young.
400
00:24:06,529 --> 00:24:10,867
I think I was... I don't know, I must
have been around 12 or something.
401
00:24:10,950 --> 00:24:15,955
And my grandmother, she's passed,
but she was so funny and wonderful.
402
00:24:16,038 --> 00:24:17,039
Well, screw her.
403
00:24:17,874 --> 00:24:20,501
- Screw my dead grandmother?
- Oh.
404
00:24:21,669 --> 00:24:25,506
- When do I get to meet her?
- What? Travis, are you listening to me?
405
00:24:25,590 --> 00:24:28,384
I'm sorry. I'm not
feeling very well.
406
00:24:28,467 --> 00:24:31,137
I do not want to
ruin this moment.
407
00:24:31,220 --> 00:24:33,472
I'm gonna run off and throw up.
408
00:24:33,556 --> 00:24:36,642
- And I will be right back, okay?
- Oh, no. Okay.
409
00:24:38,895 --> 00:24:40,605
I love you.
410
00:24:42,481 --> 00:24:43,900
So happy we're married!
411
00:24:45,401 --> 00:24:48,154
- What's the score?
- Fourth quarter just started.
412
00:24:48,237 --> 00:24:50,114
- We're down by 12.
- Fuck!
413
00:24:51,115 --> 00:24:52,241
Yeah.
414
00:24:52,783 --> 00:24:55,453
Dude, you're about to
lose a thousand bucks.
415
00:24:56,787 --> 00:24:58,080
Shit!
416
00:25:02,543 --> 00:25:05,004
- Are you feeling better?
- Uh, yeah. Feeling better.
417
00:25:05,087 --> 00:25:06,797
Mmm, soup.
418
00:25:11,969 --> 00:25:15,723
Oh, somebody liked the soup.
419
00:25:15,806 --> 00:25:18,142
Ah. It was delicious,
Sancho. I'm stuffed.
420
00:25:18,226 --> 00:25:21,103
No, that is only the
first course, señor.
421
00:25:21,187 --> 00:25:23,272
- There are six more.
- Six?
422
00:25:23,356 --> 00:25:25,316
Can we bring them all
out at the same time?
423
00:25:25,399 --> 00:25:27,360
- Uh, sure.
- That's not how it works, Travis.
424
00:25:27,443 --> 00:25:29,820
- Well, I'm just trying to be efficient.
- No, it's okay.
425
00:25:29,904 --> 00:25:33,032
Okay, it's not a problem.
I can handle this.
426
00:25:34,033 --> 00:25:35,618
- Pino!
- It's fine. It's fine.
427
00:25:35,701 --> 00:25:38,371
- No, please.
- I... No triangle.
428
00:25:39,580 --> 00:25:40,623
It always works.
429
00:25:40,706 --> 00:25:43,251
Pino, where are you, shithead?
430
00:25:45,419 --> 00:25:49,048
- Are you okay?
- Yeah. I'm fine.
431
00:25:51,467 --> 00:25:53,302
- So, how's your dad?
- What?
432
00:25:55,012 --> 00:25:57,974
I'm sorry. I was just
trying to make conversation.
433
00:25:58,057 --> 00:25:59,642
I'm not feeling too good.
434
00:26:01,936 --> 00:26:03,521
- Score?
- We're down by two.
435
00:26:03,604 --> 00:26:04,605
Yes!
436
00:26:06,399 --> 00:26:08,651
- Dude, you can't miss this!
- Fuck dinner, fuck dinner.
437
00:26:08,734 --> 00:26:10,278
- One minute.
- Yeah.
438
00:26:12,863 --> 00:26:15,741
- Okay, there we go. There we go.
- Whoo.
439
00:26:17,868 --> 00:26:21,872
Oh, you can just leave that next
to his soup. He's not feeling well.
440
00:26:22,999 --> 00:26:24,792
Yeah! Ah!
441
00:26:26,669 --> 00:26:28,796
- Oh!
- Oh! Oh, my God!
442
00:26:28,879 --> 00:26:31,674
- Oh, my God! Let's go, baby!
- It's happening! It's happening!
443
00:26:31,757 --> 00:26:33,676
Come here! Come here,
baby! Come here!
444
00:26:33,759 --> 00:26:35,678
- Whaa!
- Come here.
445
00:26:37,972 --> 00:26:40,308
- Dude, I can't believe it!
- Fucking blow my back!
446
00:26:40,391 --> 00:26:42,643
- Blow it out!
- Whoa!
447
00:26:42,727 --> 00:26:44,103
- Blow my back!
- Okay, okay.
448
00:26:44,186 --> 00:26:47,732
- Oh! Maddox special.
- Maddox special.
449
00:26:47,815 --> 00:26:49,567
Wait, wait, wait. I
need to look sick.
450
00:26:49,650 --> 00:26:51,569
Oh, yeah. You look
a little too good.
451
00:26:51,652 --> 00:26:53,279
- Soak me!
- Okay.
452
00:26:53,362 --> 00:26:54,363
Soak me!
453
00:26:55,531 --> 00:26:56,532
Fucking get me!
454
00:26:59,577 --> 00:27:03,080
Are you okay? How's your tummy?
You look a little bit clammy.
455
00:27:04,540 --> 00:27:07,460
I'm... fine.
456
00:27:07,543 --> 00:27:08,836
I was, um...
457
00:27:10,379 --> 00:27:13,257
The game and... How mad are you?
458
00:27:13,341 --> 00:27:17,094
Well, you bailed on wedding
night dinner. Minus five points.
459
00:27:17,178 --> 00:27:19,513
You lied. Minus five points.
460
00:27:19,597 --> 00:27:23,351
And then you insulted my dead
grandmother. Minus five points.
461
00:27:23,434 --> 00:27:24,935
Shit, that's a lot of points.
462
00:27:25,978 --> 00:27:29,398
Knowing he had
fucked up really bad,
463
00:27:29,482 --> 00:27:33,903
Travis planned the happiest
two days of Abby's life.
464
00:29:31,145 --> 00:29:33,981
Left hand green.
465
00:29:35,274 --> 00:29:36,942
Fire in the hole.
466
00:29:39,195 --> 00:29:42,698
If you were smart, you'd quit.
467
00:29:42,781 --> 00:29:47,244
- Yeah, but then you'd never respect me.
- Who says I ever respected you?
468
00:29:49,705 --> 00:29:53,918
Oh, no. Oh! No,
don't. Don't you...
469
00:29:54,001 --> 00:29:57,129
- Okay, you know what?
- No, no, no, no, no, no!
470
00:29:57,213 --> 00:29:58,589
- Why, dude?
- Stop.
471
00:29:58,672 --> 00:30:00,883
♪ What's a matter you, hey ♪
472
00:30:00,966 --> 00:30:02,885
♪ Gotta no respect, hey ♪
473
00:30:02,968 --> 00:30:04,887
♪ What a you think you do, hey ♪
474
00:30:04,970 --> 00:30:06,847
♪ Why you looking so sad, hey ♪
475
00:30:06,931 --> 00:30:08,891
♪ It's not so bad, hey ♪
476
00:30:08,974 --> 00:30:10,601
♪ It's a nice a place ♪
477
00:30:10,684 --> 00:30:12,186
♪ Ah shaddap-a you face ♪
478
00:30:15,189 --> 00:30:18,317
Oh, oh, oh, oh. You're a stork.
Yeah, you're an angry stork.
479
00:30:18,859 --> 00:30:21,737
I... I don't know. I
don't... What are you doing?
480
00:30:21,820 --> 00:30:23,405
- Damn. What?
- You're...
481
00:30:23,489 --> 00:30:26,534
- Baby pterodactyl.
- Thank you. Thank you.
482
00:30:26,617 --> 00:30:27,493
How did you get that?
483
00:30:27,576 --> 00:30:30,204
You're good at cards,
I'm good at charades.
484
00:30:30,287 --> 00:30:31,455
I'd love to just hunt one.
485
00:30:31,539 --> 00:30:34,917
Have a little baby pterodactyl
above the fireplace.
486
00:30:36,168 --> 00:30:38,629
How about we just stick
to deer? You're up.
487
00:30:42,341 --> 00:30:43,341
Movie.
488
00:30:44,260 --> 00:30:46,428
- American in Paris.
- Yes! Winner.
489
00:30:46,512 --> 00:30:48,264
- This is rigged.
- How's it rigged?
490
00:30:48,764 --> 00:30:50,891
She pointed to me, and
it's her favorite movie.
491
00:30:50,975 --> 00:30:53,185
I didn't know that was
your favorite movie.
492
00:30:53,269 --> 00:30:54,853
I've always planned
on living in Paris.
493
00:30:54,937 --> 00:30:57,815
How am I gonna pursue criminal
justice living in Paris?
494
00:30:58,983 --> 00:31:00,401
I don't know.
495
00:31:01,277 --> 00:31:05,406
I mean, I also didn't know that we were
gonna get married after three months.
496
00:31:08,784 --> 00:31:12,705
Okay, new game. Um, how
about Never Have I Ever?
497
00:31:12,788 --> 00:31:17,626
My favorite game. I
always lose, you know.
498
00:31:17,710 --> 00:31:22,423
Okay, I will start. Never have I
ever joined the mile high club.
499
00:31:23,465 --> 00:31:26,552
- The mile high?
- Sex on a plane.
500
00:31:27,845 --> 00:31:33,726
Um, long time ago
back when, uh, Pan Am,
501
00:31:33,809 --> 00:31:36,353
I satisfied many.
502
00:31:36,437 --> 00:31:38,439
- Oh, did you?
- You?
503
00:31:38,522 --> 00:31:44,194
Yeah, yeah, no, I... I've broken down
a few lavatory doors on United myself.
504
00:31:44,278 --> 00:31:48,616
No. I knew we had
something in common.
505
00:31:48,699 --> 00:31:52,453
- Yes, my friend.
- Yeah. Yes.
506
00:31:52,536 --> 00:31:53,662
I'm gonna go for a walk.
507
00:31:55,289 --> 00:31:58,250
Uh-oh. I said something bad.
508
00:31:58,334 --> 00:32:01,462
- What's her problem?
- What's your problem?
509
00:32:11,972 --> 00:32:13,641
You wanna talk about it?
510
00:32:15,225 --> 00:32:16,435
Talk about what?
511
00:32:17,227 --> 00:32:20,147
How we're married and we
barely know each other?
512
00:32:21,148 --> 00:32:23,442
- That's not true.
- I mean, kind of.
513
00:32:23,525 --> 00:32:28,489
I wanna move to Paris, and apparently
you love having sex on airplanes.
514
00:32:28,572 --> 00:32:32,493
Have you ever stopped to think
maybe why I'm against an annulment?
515
00:32:32,576 --> 00:32:34,376
What couple do you know
that has survived one?
516
00:32:37,706 --> 00:32:38,706
Hmm?
517
00:32:43,128 --> 00:32:44,463
I see your point.
518
00:32:45,589 --> 00:32:51,470
Look, if you're worried about Paris,
screw it, let's move to Paris.
519
00:32:52,012 --> 00:32:56,350
I can promise you, we'll
never have a dull moment.
520
00:32:57,893 --> 00:32:59,645
I have no doubt.
521
00:32:59,728 --> 00:33:03,440
Speaking of which, have
you ever had pool sex?
522
00:33:04,400 --> 00:33:05,901
Excuse me?
523
00:33:09,029 --> 00:33:11,532
Is it anything like shower sex?
524
00:33:11,615 --> 00:33:14,576
It is. Only it's a lot
prettier in movies.
525
00:33:14,660 --> 00:33:17,830
Well, I think I'm gonna pass on
anything of yours entering me
526
00:33:17,913 --> 00:33:19,748
until it's wearing a raincoat.
527
00:33:25,295 --> 00:33:29,091
Abby and Travis thought
the worst was over,
528
00:33:29,174 --> 00:33:32,845
but the worst was yet to come.
529
00:33:56,076 --> 00:33:57,119
Oh!
530
00:33:58,495 --> 00:34:01,874
Wow. Oh! Ooh.
531
00:34:06,211 --> 00:34:07,755
- Yeah?
- Throw, catch.
532
00:34:07,838 --> 00:34:10,132
Throw, catch. Throw, catch.
533
00:34:10,215 --> 00:34:13,218
You have such good coordination.
I don't think I could do it.
534
00:34:18,807 --> 00:34:21,018
Ooh. So close. Again?
535
00:34:21,101 --> 00:34:23,645
Throw, catch. Throw, catch.
536
00:34:25,105 --> 00:34:27,733
- Morning.
- Buenos días, señor Maddox.
537
00:34:30,319 --> 00:34:31,779
Those are good grapes, huh?
538
00:34:34,114 --> 00:34:36,325
I guess you don't like 'em.
539
00:34:39,286 --> 00:34:41,038
Órale.
540
00:34:50,672 --> 00:34:52,758
- I should get back to work.
- Yeah.
541
00:34:59,139 --> 00:35:01,517
- It's cute, right?
- Oh, it's adorable.
542
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:03,769
- Would you hunt this?
- What?
543
00:35:03,852 --> 00:35:06,396
- Have this up on your mantle?
- What?
544
00:35:08,690 --> 00:35:10,984
- That's a lot of salt, babe.
- Yeah, I like salt.
545
00:35:11,068 --> 00:35:12,361
Do you not know that about me?
546
00:35:12,444 --> 00:35:14,071
Buenos días.
547
00:35:14,154 --> 00:35:15,155
- Buenos días.
- Hey.
548
00:35:15,239 --> 00:35:16,240
Good morning.
549
00:35:29,503 --> 00:35:32,589
- Is that all I get?
- I said hi to you this morning.
550
00:35:33,006 --> 00:35:36,301
Oh. Is that what that was, when
you showed your cock to the worker?
551
00:35:37,845 --> 00:35:41,139
Well, you were so busy juggling
balls, I thought I'd show you mine.
552
00:35:41,223 --> 00:35:45,018
- Can't have everything, I guess.
- Yeah, guess you can't.
553
00:35:52,818 --> 00:35:55,404
Hey. So what's going on?
What happened this morning?
554
00:35:56,238 --> 00:35:57,990
Come on, talk to me.
555
00:35:58,073 --> 00:35:59,884
Well, there was this guy,
and he was outside juggling.
556
00:35:59,908 --> 00:36:01,845
- And I've always wanted to know how to...
- Mare!
557
00:36:01,869 --> 00:36:04,913
- What is wrong with everyone today?
- Mare, where are you?
558
00:36:04,997 --> 00:36:07,833
So, your new friend gonna
join us down at the beach?
559
00:36:07,916 --> 00:36:11,670
His name is Miguel, and, no, because
you scared him off with your big dick.
560
00:36:11,753 --> 00:36:12,838
Mare!
561
00:36:14,089 --> 00:36:17,050
Hey, guys. Hey, hey.
Have you seen Mare?
562
00:36:21,346 --> 00:36:24,141
- Look, I know I can be possessive.
- You? No.
563
00:36:24,224 --> 00:36:27,519
- I just don't like when guys touch you.
- Well, Travis, you have to get over that.
564
00:36:27,603 --> 00:36:29,354
What if I have a male
gynecologist one day?
565
00:36:29,438 --> 00:36:31,315
Why would you have
a male gynecologist
566
00:36:31,398 --> 00:36:33,400
when there's perfectly
good female gynecologists?
567
00:36:33,483 --> 00:36:35,277
What about female empowerment?
568
00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:36,963
Isn't that what the diversity
movement's all about?
569
00:36:36,987 --> 00:36:39,406
Oh, my God, I hate
you right now.
570
00:36:39,489 --> 00:36:41,533
Look who's not
being progressive.
571
00:36:41,617 --> 00:36:43,493
Mare?
572
00:36:43,577 --> 00:36:44,995
Mare?
573
00:36:46,872 --> 00:36:48,582
- You miss me?
- Ugh.
574
00:36:50,918 --> 00:36:54,129
Hey. Hey, have you guys
seen a small American girl?
575
00:36:55,047 --> 00:36:56,965
We don't speak English.
576
00:36:59,217 --> 00:37:01,261
We're looking for our friends.
577
00:37:01,345 --> 00:37:03,013
Whoo.
578
00:37:03,096 --> 00:37:05,641
You must have a lot of friends.
579
00:37:05,724 --> 00:37:07,476
Whee!
580
00:37:07,559 --> 00:37:09,227
Uh... Uh...
581
00:37:09,311 --> 00:37:12,814
Our friends are from
the United States.
582
00:37:12,898 --> 00:37:14,775
Are they as cute as you are?
583
00:37:17,402 --> 00:37:18,487
I'm Blanca.
584
00:37:18,570 --> 00:37:19,570
I'm Travis.
585
00:37:20,322 --> 00:37:21,949
Are you here on vacation?
586
00:37:23,116 --> 00:37:24,785
Yes - vacation.
587
00:37:24,868 --> 00:37:25,786
Yes!
588
00:37:25,869 --> 00:37:27,496
Are you having fun?
589
00:37:28,997 --> 00:37:30,582
It's a good color, right?
590
00:37:30,666 --> 00:37:32,352
- She didn't like the color before.
- Oh. I didn't.
591
00:37:32,376 --> 00:37:34,211
I don't speak English!
592
00:37:34,294 --> 00:37:36,213
Oh, yeah. Sí, Inglés.
593
00:37:36,296 --> 00:37:37,297
And this?
594
00:37:37,839 --> 00:37:40,676
Watch. It gets bigger.
595
00:37:41,343 --> 00:37:42,886
It took a while.
596
00:37:46,348 --> 00:37:47,348
What does it mean?
597
00:37:47,683 --> 00:37:49,059
Oh, yeah. It's...
598
00:37:49,142 --> 00:37:50,602
Ah.
599
00:37:50,686 --> 00:37:52,145
One moment...
600
00:37:55,190 --> 00:37:56,608
Hey. Hey, hey, hey.
601
00:37:57,818 --> 00:37:59,987
- Where'd you go?
- You seemed distracted.
602
00:38:00,070 --> 00:38:02,048
Well, I was just trying to find
out where our friends were.
603
00:38:02,072 --> 00:38:03,712
I didn't ask them to
take their tops off.
604
00:38:03,782 --> 00:38:05,200
Oh, okay.
605
00:38:05,283 --> 00:38:07,369
Look, look, look, look.
It's a topless beach.
606
00:38:07,452 --> 00:38:10,747
See? I don't make the rules
here. Boobies, boobs, tits.
607
00:38:11,540 --> 00:38:14,793
Yeah. Yeah! Travis, you
know what? You're right.
608
00:38:14,876 --> 00:38:17,796
Thanks. No, honestly, I wasn't
trying to cause trouble or anything.
609
00:38:19,673 --> 00:38:22,300
- What are you doing?
- You said it was a topless beach.
610
00:38:22,384 --> 00:38:24,928
- That doesn't apply to foreigners!
- Oh, that is absurd.
611
00:38:25,012 --> 00:38:26,739
- Photos! Portraits!
- You're absurd!
612
00:38:26,763 --> 00:38:28,098
Please...
613
00:38:28,849 --> 00:38:31,852
- What is this, OnlyFans? Fuck off!
- You're a psycho!
614
00:38:31,935 --> 00:38:35,105
- Leave me alone.
- Cover your titties!
615
00:38:35,188 --> 00:38:40,027
Ay, caramba!
616
00:38:41,319 --> 00:38:43,039
Come back, baby.
I make movies.
617
00:38:56,752 --> 00:39:01,131
Mare! Mare! Mare, look! Look,
I'm shedding my inhibitions!
618
00:39:05,927 --> 00:39:08,638
Hey, hey, hey. She's the
one that took her top off.
619
00:39:15,979 --> 00:39:16,897
Central!
620
00:39:30,368 --> 00:39:31,453
Travis!
621
00:39:36,708 --> 00:39:38,043
Hey, blondie.
622
00:39:41,671 --> 00:39:44,841
It's the police!
You're under arrest.
623
00:39:46,927 --> 00:39:48,053
Really?
624
00:40:04,528 --> 00:40:07,864
Come on, Darius. Just
give me five more minutes.
625
00:40:07,948 --> 00:40:10,450
- Mmm.
- Look, I got a crisis on my hands.
626
00:40:10,534 --> 00:40:14,496
- So just please, okay? Please.
- Mmm.
627
00:40:14,579 --> 00:40:17,165
What is so important that
you need me on a Sunday?
628
00:40:19,167 --> 00:40:20,335
What do you mean?
629
00:40:21,878 --> 00:40:24,214
Her stripper name is Pocahontas.
630
00:40:24,297 --> 00:40:26,675
She needs to wear the headdress.
631
00:40:26,758 --> 00:40:31,263
I have had enough of this culturally
inappropriate woke shit. The last...
632
00:40:34,182 --> 00:40:37,102
What did I tell you
about sneaking up on me?
633
00:40:37,185 --> 00:40:39,813
Sorry, sir. Sorry. Sorry, sir.
634
00:40:42,315 --> 00:40:44,192
I'll call you back.
635
00:40:46,862 --> 00:40:49,948
Oh, my... I guess this is their
way of staying under the radar.
636
00:40:50,574 --> 00:40:51,741
Ass-hats.
637
00:40:53,201 --> 00:40:56,538
Gatito? I know this place.
638
00:40:56,621 --> 00:40:59,457
Darius and I fell
in love down here.
639
00:40:59,541 --> 00:41:01,710
Call Vince, take a couple
of guys down there,
640
00:41:01,793 --> 00:41:04,379
and go get me my money
and a couple of fingers.
641
00:41:04,462 --> 00:41:06,173
- Fingers?
- Yeah, fingers.
642
00:41:06,256 --> 00:41:09,634
No, no, forget it. I'm gonna
take care of this myself.
643
00:41:09,718 --> 00:41:13,013
What time's the next flight?
644
00:41:13,096 --> 00:41:14,306
Darius!
645
00:41:19,102 --> 00:41:21,396
Darius! Dari...
646
00:41:25,150 --> 00:41:29,696
So... I posted your bail.
647
00:41:31,031 --> 00:41:33,325
But since you don't
have passports,
648
00:41:34,201 --> 00:41:35,702
you're gonna have to wait.
649
00:41:54,679 --> 00:41:56,848
Thank you, guys, for bailing
us out and being so nice.
650
00:41:56,932 --> 00:41:58,767
I'm just sorry my
husband is so rude.
651
00:41:58,850 --> 00:42:02,437
Well, I wouldn't have to be so rude if
my wife would just respect some of my...
652
00:42:02,520 --> 00:42:04,481
Rules? Are you gonna
house-break me too?
653
00:42:04,564 --> 00:42:07,442
I was gonna say "requests,"
like when we're on our honeymoon
654
00:42:07,525 --> 00:42:11,821
surrounded by a few hundred horny
spring-break TikTok obsessed douchebags,
655
00:42:11,905 --> 00:42:13,925
- maybe don't show your tit...
- Oh, do not say the T word.
656
00:42:13,949 --> 00:42:16,260
If you say the T word, I am
jumping out of this car, Travis,
657
00:42:16,284 --> 00:42:18,036
and out of your life, I mean it.
658
00:42:18,119 --> 00:42:19,555
That's a bullshit way to
end an argument, Abby.
659
00:42:19,579 --> 00:42:22,540
- I don't care.
- Then don't show your titties!
660
00:42:22,624 --> 00:42:25,186
- Titties, titties, titties, titties!
- Oh, fuck you, Travis Maddox.
661
00:42:25,210 --> 00:42:26,753
- Fuck you!
- Titties, titties!
662
00:42:27,796 --> 00:42:31,424
- Abby, get back here.
- No, no, wait, wait. Señor Travis. No.
663
00:42:31,508 --> 00:42:34,302
- Take your hands off me.
- Miguel can take care of her.
664
00:42:34,386 --> 00:42:37,222
She's my wife. She just has
a bad habit of running away.
665
00:42:37,305 --> 00:42:39,599
Yes, because she is
running from you.
666
00:42:46,940 --> 00:42:50,485
I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I was just...
I'm just looking for my ride.
667
00:42:52,153 --> 00:42:53,947
I was just looking
for a friend of mine.
668
00:42:54,030 --> 00:42:57,867
Angel! Why do you bring
your family such shame?
669
00:42:57,951 --> 00:43:00,704
Go home! All of you, now!
670
00:43:03,331 --> 00:43:06,501
- Are you okay?
- Yeah. Yeah, that was...
671
00:43:07,752 --> 00:43:09,504
I could really use a drink.
672
00:43:11,172 --> 00:43:12,299
Thank you.
673
00:43:16,344 --> 00:43:19,764
Hey. If you could at least text
me to let me know you're alive,
674
00:43:19,848 --> 00:43:21,516
that would be much
fucking appreciated!
675
00:43:21,599 --> 00:43:25,270
- Jesus. Is that the way you talk to her?
- What the fuck do you want?
676
00:43:25,353 --> 00:43:27,063
What the fuck do I...
677
00:43:28,273 --> 00:43:31,776
Let me be clear. I think
you're being an asshole.
678
00:43:31,860 --> 00:43:36,239
And I think that getting married at
19 is the dumbest shit in the world.
679
00:43:38,158 --> 00:43:41,911
But all I care about right now is my
best friend, and she's in love with you.
680
00:43:42,287 --> 00:43:43,496
Yeah, I love her too.
681
00:43:43,580 --> 00:43:47,250
- What's the problem?
- The problem is you're suffocating her!
682
00:43:47,334 --> 00:43:50,295
You're suffocating her, and she
has a bad habit of disappearing,
683
00:43:50,378 --> 00:43:52,672
and I don't want that to
happen to either of us.
684
00:43:56,843 --> 00:43:58,553
Buenas noches, Miguel.
685
00:44:01,139 --> 00:44:03,308
Well, aren't you super popular?
686
00:44:03,391 --> 00:44:04,976
- Hola, Miguel.
- Hola.
687
00:44:05,060 --> 00:44:06,853
That wasn't always the case.
688
00:44:07,771 --> 00:44:10,190
I find that so hard to believe.
689
00:44:10,273 --> 00:44:11,858
You're way too nice.
690
00:44:13,401 --> 00:44:14,402
What's your back story?
691
00:44:16,529 --> 00:44:17,572
Tell me.
692
00:44:19,324 --> 00:44:22,577
Okay. Um... Well, I'm
part Maldive, part Samoan.
693
00:44:22,660 --> 00:44:25,205
- Okay.
- My family moved here when I was a kid.
694
00:44:25,288 --> 00:44:27,999
- Okay.
- They were actually pretty wealthy.
695
00:44:28,083 --> 00:44:31,002
You know, the house that you
stay at used to be our home.
696
00:44:31,795 --> 00:44:32,921
What happened?
697
00:44:33,463 --> 00:44:36,549
The government took it
when my father was killed.
698
00:44:36,633 --> 00:44:40,011
- Miguel, I...
- No, don't shed any tears for him.
699
00:44:40,762 --> 00:44:42,055
He wasn't a good guy.
700
00:44:42,806 --> 00:44:46,726
When he was killed, my
mom and I had to restart.
701
00:44:46,810 --> 00:44:51,606
I was just a very
angry kid, like Angel.
702
00:44:52,565 --> 00:44:54,150
And then one day,
I got the calling.
703
00:44:54,234 --> 00:44:55,234
The calling?
704
00:44:56,945 --> 00:44:59,781
Oh. Oh, you mean
like "the" calling.
705
00:44:59,864 --> 00:45:02,242
- So you're a...
- Priest. In training.
706
00:45:03,034 --> 00:45:05,662
I did not see that coming. Wow.
707
00:45:05,745 --> 00:45:08,331
Tell me, Abby, have you ever...
708
00:45:09,416 --> 00:45:13,503
I mean, I believe, but I don't
practice or anything like that.
709
00:45:13,586 --> 00:45:15,231
Well, there's a first
time for everything.
710
00:45:15,255 --> 00:45:18,091
- No. No, I still got my beer.
- Jesus, we've got another!
711
00:45:18,174 --> 00:45:19,175
I'm not that bad!
712
00:45:26,391 --> 00:45:28,226
Have we ever talked like this?
713
00:45:29,310 --> 00:45:32,689
Yeah. There was that one
time in the laundry room.
714
00:45:33,481 --> 00:45:34,816
Yeah, you know.
715
00:45:34,899 --> 00:45:40,071
You know asked me if I had any soap,
and I said that I needed to get some.
716
00:45:42,407 --> 00:45:44,742
That was nice.
717
00:45:46,369 --> 00:45:48,371
Yeah, it's funny. You...
718
00:45:48,455 --> 00:45:51,499
You don't get to pick the people
who your boyfriend hangs out with.
719
00:45:51,583 --> 00:45:54,711
- I never would have picked you.
- I wouldn't have picked you either.
720
00:45:56,463 --> 00:45:58,214
How long have you known her?
721
00:45:59,215 --> 00:46:00,300
A long time.
722
00:46:04,304 --> 00:46:05,763
That's pretty cute.
723
00:46:05,847 --> 00:46:07,932
You know that kid who does
all these great things
724
00:46:08,016 --> 00:46:10,518
and her parents never
show up for anything?
725
00:46:11,811 --> 00:46:13,146
That was Abby.
726
00:46:14,147 --> 00:46:16,399
It's frustrating to watch.
727
00:46:16,483 --> 00:46:20,737
But, Travis, she is not
your problem to solve.
728
00:46:21,654 --> 00:46:24,741
Okay? You just have
to give her time.
729
00:46:24,824 --> 00:46:26,659
I mean, she's had no
stability in her life,
730
00:46:26,743 --> 00:46:32,743
and you are like this... egomaniac
emblem of hyper-masculinity,
731
00:46:32,999 --> 00:46:36,461
semi-toxic, who I actually
hope is, you know, extinct.
732
00:46:36,544 --> 00:46:38,939
- Whoa, whoa. Where'd that come from?
- Oh, I'm just teasing you.
733
00:46:38,963 --> 00:46:40,465
- Jesus!
- What the hell?
734
00:46:44,260 --> 00:46:45,260
Uh...
735
00:46:46,387 --> 00:46:48,389
Hey, guys.
736
00:46:48,473 --> 00:46:51,351
- Are you okay?
- Yeah. No, I'm...
737
00:46:51,434 --> 00:46:56,147
Yeah, I was... Uh, yeah, I was just
stargazing at... at, uh, Copernicus and...
738
00:46:56,231 --> 00:46:57,857
Telescope's over there, bro.
739
00:46:58,733 --> 00:47:00,818
Oh, they have one
of those over there?
740
00:47:01,694 --> 00:47:04,572
- Were you spying on us?
- No, no, I would never do that, okay?
741
00:47:04,656 --> 00:47:07,784
I'm... I was, uh... I
was getting coconuts.
742
00:47:07,867 --> 00:47:09,577
Your favorite.
743
00:47:09,661 --> 00:47:11,371
Babe. Hey, where you going?
744
00:47:12,288 --> 00:47:13,414
Babe!
745
00:47:13,498 --> 00:47:16,292
Whoa! Whoa, you feel that?
746
00:47:16,376 --> 00:47:20,171
Whoa, you feel that?
It's an earthquake, babe!
747
00:47:20,838 --> 00:47:22,757
She... She's gone, buddy.
748
00:47:22,840 --> 00:47:25,093
- Whoa, Mommy!
- You aced it.
749
00:47:25,176 --> 00:47:29,472
Thanks for everything today, and
for making sure I got home safe.
750
00:47:29,556 --> 00:47:31,641
Look, I know you have
a lot on your mind,
751
00:47:31,724 --> 00:47:36,187
and Travis has a... interesting
way of expressing himself.
752
00:47:36,271 --> 00:47:39,774
But something tells me that this
marriage is worth fighting for.
753
00:47:40,733 --> 00:47:42,068
And I know I'm not ordained yet,
754
00:47:42,151 --> 00:47:46,239
but if you and Travis ever wanna talk
anything through, I'm here to listen.
755
00:47:46,864 --> 00:47:50,368
And I won't splash you with
holy water or anything.
756
00:47:50,493 --> 00:47:52,412
- Thanks.
- Bye.
757
00:47:52,495 --> 00:47:53,495
Bye.
758
00:48:12,640 --> 00:48:14,058
- Hi.
- Hi.
759
00:48:15,351 --> 00:48:17,562
It's the first time we've
been in sync for a while.
760
00:48:17,645 --> 00:48:18,896
Yeah.
761
00:48:20,898 --> 00:48:22,567
I'm sorry I've been such a dick.
762
00:48:23,526 --> 00:48:25,695
I mean, you haven't. It's...
763
00:48:25,778 --> 00:48:27,030
I really have.
764
00:48:28,156 --> 00:48:29,866
We know I have.
765
00:48:29,949 --> 00:48:32,076
You have.
766
00:48:32,160 --> 00:48:35,788
Well, thank you. I
appreciate that. It...
767
00:48:37,498 --> 00:48:40,918
Look, I mean, I have a really bad
habit of running away from my problems.
768
00:48:41,002 --> 00:48:42,920
- You do.
- I do.
769
00:48:43,004 --> 00:48:45,381
And I really don't
wanna run away from you.
770
00:48:48,051 --> 00:48:50,178
Maybe we just need a
little bit of a break.
771
00:48:51,929 --> 00:48:55,975
Our whole relationship has just
been this crazy pressure cooker,
772
00:48:56,059 --> 00:49:00,813
and neither of us have been able to go off
and have any fun or blow off any steam.
773
00:49:03,358 --> 00:49:05,902
I have fun with you.
774
00:49:06,944 --> 00:49:09,364
I know, but I... I
meant independently.
775
00:49:09,447 --> 00:49:10,448
Yeah.
776
00:49:11,366 --> 00:49:14,452
I have always wanted
a bachelor party.
777
00:49:14,535 --> 00:49:15,536
Okay.
778
00:49:17,121 --> 00:49:20,083
Let's do it. I mean, there's
no time like the present.
779
00:49:23,461 --> 00:49:25,296
I like your thinking, Abby.
780
00:49:26,047 --> 00:49:29,425
Hey, bro, get all the boys
together and come down to Mexico.
781
00:49:29,509 --> 00:49:31,678
Oh, by the way, we got married.
782
00:49:31,761 --> 00:49:33,054
Abby, dipshit.
783
00:49:33,721 --> 00:49:39,644
Always ready for a good time, the
Maddox brothers flew down to Gatito.
784
00:49:40,770 --> 00:49:43,773
Yeah, Dad, yeah. Talk soon.
785
00:49:44,607 --> 00:49:47,318
- What'd he say?
- That I'm in charge.
786
00:49:47,402 --> 00:49:49,904
And to make sure you
don't do anything stupid.
787
00:49:54,117 --> 00:49:56,202
It says that El Jefe
had kilos of cocaine
788
00:49:56,285 --> 00:49:59,997
that was eaten by a clowder
of hairless Mexican cats.
789
00:50:00,081 --> 00:50:01,958
I swear, if you ruin
Travis's bachelor party
790
00:50:02,041 --> 00:50:03,501
with a cocaine cat
scavenger hunt,
791
00:50:03,584 --> 00:50:07,171
I will sell you to a local cartel
and they will use you as a drug mule.
792
00:50:07,255 --> 00:50:08,256
Ow!
793
00:50:12,009 --> 00:50:16,472
No, look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I
don't know how many times I can say it.
794
00:50:16,556 --> 00:50:20,059
There's a first-class ticket waiting
for you at Delta. I booked us a suite.
795
00:50:20,143 --> 00:50:23,980
I just gotta get this money and a couple
of fingers, and then it's just us.
796
00:50:24,063 --> 00:50:29,444
There will be no talk of work, I
swear, just massages and margaritas.
797
00:50:29,527 --> 00:50:34,115
Oh, Darius, just come
down, please. Call me back.
798
00:50:38,536 --> 00:50:44,083
Don't you ever, ever
do that again, you...
799
00:50:44,167 --> 00:50:47,962
Hey. Oh, hey, babe. Hey, how are
you? Where were you last night?
800
00:50:48,045 --> 00:50:50,715
- Why'd you spy on me?
- Spy? What are you talking about?
801
00:50:50,798 --> 00:50:52,884
- What are you talking about?
- So everything's fine.
802
00:50:52,967 --> 00:50:55,845
Yes, everything's fine, so
there's nothing to talk about.
803
00:50:55,928 --> 00:50:58,181
Oh! Ah!
804
00:50:58,264 --> 00:51:01,768
Oh, that hurt. Oh... Babe!
805
00:51:01,851 --> 00:51:04,037
- Why did you do that?
- Hey! You holding out on us, cuz?
806
00:51:04,061 --> 00:51:07,774
- Hey, guys. Welcome to Mexico.
- Keeping the riches to yourself, huh?
807
00:51:07,857 --> 00:51:10,151
- Yeah, you're a fucking dead man, right?
- What?
808
00:51:10,234 --> 00:51:11,903
- This place have a bidet?
- Fucking nerd.
809
00:51:11,986 --> 00:51:14,989
What? It was a long flight. They're
completely normal in Europe. No!
810
00:51:15,072 --> 00:51:16,741
Don't chuck me in the ocean!
811
00:51:16,824 --> 00:51:18,201
- Hey, buddy.
- Hi.
812
00:51:18,284 --> 00:51:20,828
- Hey, hey, guys.
- Change of plans.
813
00:51:20,912 --> 00:51:23,289
So, the girls' spa treatment
is now in the afternoon,
814
00:51:23,372 --> 00:51:24,641
so they're going to
the beach with us.
815
00:51:24,665 --> 00:51:27,265
- Will you teach me how to play football?
- Hey, Shep, think fast.
816
00:51:28,461 --> 00:51:30,797
- Heads up, buddy.
- Touchdown!
817
00:51:30,880 --> 00:51:34,425
♪ Call me good Call me bad ♪
818
00:51:38,471 --> 00:51:41,307
♪ But I know that you're sad ♪
819
00:51:42,099 --> 00:51:46,103
♪ And I know I'll make you happy with
the one thing that you never had ♪
820
00:51:46,187 --> 00:51:50,775
♪ Baby, I'm your man ♪
821
00:51:51,359 --> 00:51:53,486
♪ Don't you know that ♪
822
00:51:53,569 --> 00:51:58,241
♪ Baby, I'm your man ♪
823
00:51:59,992 --> 00:52:03,371
♪ You bet! If you're gonna
do it, do it right, right ♪
824
00:52:03,454 --> 00:52:04,455
♪ Do it with me ♪
825
00:52:04,539 --> 00:52:06,666
♪ If you're gonna do
it, do it right, right ♪
826
00:52:06,749 --> 00:52:08,042
♪ Do it with me ♪
827
00:52:08,125 --> 00:52:10,002
♪ If you're gonna do
it, do it right, right ♪
828
00:52:10,461 --> 00:52:11,462
♪ Do it with me ♪
829
00:52:11,546 --> 00:52:14,090
♪ If you're gonna do
it, do it right, right ♪
830
00:52:14,173 --> 00:52:15,174
♪ Do it with me ♪
831
00:52:15,258 --> 00:52:17,927
♪ So good You're divine ♪
832
00:52:18,719 --> 00:52:21,931
♪ Wanna take you, wanna make you
But they tell me it's a crime ♪
833
00:52:22,014 --> 00:52:25,393
♪ Oh, everybody knows
where the good people go ♪
834
00:52:25,476 --> 00:52:30,106
♪ But where we're going, baby
Ain't no such word as no ♪
835
00:52:30,189 --> 00:52:35,152
♪ Baby, I'm your man ♪
836
00:52:35,236 --> 00:52:37,071
♪ Don't you know who I am ♪
837
00:52:37,154 --> 00:52:42,869
♪ Baby, I'm your man ♪
838
00:52:42,952 --> 00:52:44,370
♪ You know You bet ♪
839
00:52:44,453 --> 00:52:46,831
♪ If you're gonna do
it, do it right, right ♪
840
00:52:46,914 --> 00:52:48,124
♪ Do it with me ♪
841
00:52:48,207 --> 00:52:50,376
♪ If you're gonna do
it, do it right, right ♪
842
00:52:50,459 --> 00:52:52,003
♪ Do it with me ♪
843
00:52:52,086 --> 00:52:54,505
♪ I'll be your man I'll be
the one who understands ♪
844
00:52:54,589 --> 00:52:58,217
♪ I'll be your first, I'll be your
last I'll be the only one you ask ♪
845
00:52:58,301 --> 00:53:01,554
♪ I'll be your friend, I'll be your toy
I'll be the one who brings you joy ♪
846
00:53:01,637 --> 00:53:03,764
♪ I'll be your hope,
I'll be your pearl ♪
847
00:53:03,848 --> 00:53:06,267
♪ I'll take you halfway
round the world ♪
848
00:53:07,310 --> 00:53:10,479
♪ I'll make you rich
I'll make you poor ♪
849
00:53:12,398 --> 00:53:15,443
♪ Just don't use the door If
you're gonna do it, do it right ♪
850
00:53:15,526 --> 00:53:19,989
Hey. Okay, babe, what's going on?
Seriously, you're acting so weird.
851
00:53:20,072 --> 00:53:22,408
I mean, you literally
built a wall between us.
852
00:53:23,117 --> 00:53:24,285
Okay, you...
853
00:53:25,077 --> 00:53:26,722
You know when you're
driving down the highway
854
00:53:26,746 --> 00:53:29,874
and a really great song comes on,
and you get really into the song
855
00:53:29,957 --> 00:53:31,517
and then you miss
your exit and then...
856
00:53:31,542 --> 00:53:34,128
Okay, wait, wait. Am I
the song or the highway?
857
00:53:34,211 --> 00:53:37,506
No, just... I feel like I'm learning
all of these things about you.
858
00:53:37,590 --> 00:53:38,590
Good, good, good.
859
00:53:38,633 --> 00:53:40,718
You should be, you know,
learning things about me,
860
00:53:40,801 --> 00:53:42,361
and me learning things
about you, yeah.
861
00:53:42,428 --> 00:53:45,264
Yeah, no, definitely. Then
I find out that you hunt.
862
00:53:45,348 --> 00:53:48,559
- I hunt. Yeah, I'm not hiding it.
- No, you're not listening to me.
863
00:53:48,643 --> 00:53:51,483
- You're not listening to me.
- Okay, maybe I shouldn't have even tried.
864
00:53:51,562 --> 00:53:53,439
Yeah, maybe you shouldn't have.
865
00:53:56,359 --> 00:53:59,445
And so the boys and girls
went their separate ways.
866
00:53:59,528 --> 00:54:02,615
The girls went off
to a relaxing spa,
867
00:54:02,698 --> 00:54:06,035
{\an8}and the boys, well...
868
00:54:16,837 --> 00:54:18,798
Let's go! Let's go!
869
00:54:18,881 --> 00:54:21,467
More, more! Don't
be a bitch! Come on.
870
00:54:24,303 --> 00:54:26,806
Ah, what the fuck!
871
00:54:26,889 --> 00:54:30,059
- Come on, let's go. Let's go, bitch!
- Shut up, bitch. Shut up!
872
00:54:37,024 --> 00:54:39,836
- Jeez, my skin feels like silk.
- We should try that seaweed wrap next.
873
00:54:39,860 --> 00:54:42,047
Ooh, I would love to do a seaweed
wrap. I've always wanted to.
874
00:54:42,071 --> 00:54:42,989
Yeah.
875
00:54:43,072 --> 00:54:45,533
Okay, well, at least
come with us to dinner.
876
00:54:45,616 --> 00:54:48,160
No, nobody's going
to bother you.
877
00:54:49,078 --> 00:54:51,205
You know what? Okay,
do whatever you want.
878
00:54:51,288 --> 00:54:53,958
But tomorrow we
are going sailing.
879
00:54:56,293 --> 00:54:59,380
- I'm sorry about that.
- No, you're fine.
880
00:54:59,463 --> 00:55:02,883
- Sounds like you need some relaxation.
- What brings you girls down here?
881
00:55:02,967 --> 00:55:05,761
- Honeymoon.
- Oh!
882
00:55:06,595 --> 00:55:09,390
I once had a one-night
stand with my doula.
883
00:55:11,225 --> 00:55:14,103
- Oh, n... No, no, no. It's not, no.
- No, not us, not us.
884
00:55:14,186 --> 00:55:16,081
Not that they're, no. Great
for you, though. No, but...
885
00:55:16,105 --> 00:55:18,315
- We don't have a problem with that.
- No, it's great.
886
00:55:18,399 --> 00:55:21,402
- We love that. We support that.
- It's her honeymoon. It's not...
887
00:55:21,485 --> 00:55:23,446
Yeah. It's our bachelor
and bachelorette parties.
888
00:55:23,529 --> 00:55:27,283
- We're doing it kind of backwards.
- Well, where's the rest of your party?
889
00:55:27,366 --> 00:55:29,952
- Yeah, you're looking at it.
- Yeah.
890
00:55:30,036 --> 00:55:32,371
Well, is that what you wanted?
891
00:55:33,622 --> 00:55:35,916
Well... no.
892
00:55:36,000 --> 00:55:38,669
Oh, okay. It's what
he wanted. Okay.
893
00:55:38,753 --> 00:55:41,213
Yeah, I guess I'm just
trying to make him happy.
894
00:55:41,297 --> 00:55:44,425
Oh, God. Oh, no, I heard
it. That was awful.
895
00:55:44,508 --> 00:55:46,844
- I know.
- Hey, hey, hey, you.
896
00:55:46,927 --> 00:55:49,346
- Put that down.
- Hey, I can't, I can't.
897
00:55:49,430 --> 00:55:52,141
- Put it down.
- Hey, you need to behave.
898
00:55:52,224 --> 00:55:54,185
Oh. Are you gonna teach me?
899
00:55:57,938 --> 00:55:59,732
Ow!
900
00:55:59,815 --> 00:56:03,444
- Oh, my God, you're my hero.
- Pour yourselves a drink, girls.
901
00:56:03,527 --> 00:56:04,653
Okay.
902
00:56:05,321 --> 00:56:06,781
Can I be frank?
903
00:56:06,864 --> 00:56:07,865
- Please.
- Please.
904
00:56:07,948 --> 00:56:10,951
This marriage is starting
off on the wrong foot.
905
00:56:11,035 --> 00:56:14,955
This is not about his needs.
It's about your needs.
906
00:56:15,039 --> 00:56:17,041
Now, I lead women's retreats
throughout the year,
907
00:56:17,124 --> 00:56:19,668
and it's mostly Fortune 500,
908
00:56:19,752 --> 00:56:22,838
but I also cater to the homemaker
and poor people like yourself.
909
00:56:22,922 --> 00:56:23,922
Oh.
910
00:56:23,964 --> 00:56:26,884
Because as much as you would
like to deny it, girls,
911
00:56:26,967 --> 00:56:31,430
you cannot disrespect or
demean the power of the pussy.
912
00:56:32,890 --> 00:56:34,850
Drink your drink.
913
00:56:34,934 --> 00:56:36,936
- Drink it. It's expensive.
- Oh.
914
00:56:38,896 --> 00:56:41,982
Ladies, these two
will be joining us.
915
00:56:42,066 --> 00:56:43,734
I have some calls to make,
916
00:56:43,818 --> 00:56:46,070
but Fernando knows where
to take you, so run along.
917
00:56:46,153 --> 00:56:47,404
I'll see you later.
918
00:56:53,661 --> 00:56:55,704
We don't see this in the States.
919
00:56:55,788 --> 00:56:58,749
Yeah. That's because
it's illegal.
920
00:57:11,679 --> 00:57:13,180
My son!
921
00:57:14,473 --> 00:57:15,808
My son!
922
00:57:16,475 --> 00:57:17,935
My son!
923
00:57:35,911 --> 00:57:37,705
You okay, Shep?
924
00:57:38,664 --> 00:57:43,252
Yeah, yeah. Sorry. I, uh... Just
fuck. The allergy season, right?
925
00:57:44,587 --> 00:57:48,549
After massages and
muchas margaritas,
926
00:57:48,632 --> 00:57:53,012
the girls chose to take their
bachelorette party to the streets
927
00:57:53,095 --> 00:57:55,139
in search of more fun.
928
00:57:55,222 --> 00:57:57,808
♪ Welcome to the festival
The festival de lucha ♪
929
00:57:57,892 --> 00:57:59,560
Can you tell me
where the lucha is?
930
00:57:59,643 --> 00:58:03,147
Your tent over
yonder, my fair wench.
931
00:58:03,230 --> 00:58:05,649
- Hey, excuse me, Shakespeare.
- Ow.
932
00:58:05,733 --> 00:58:08,319
I don't really like that
you called me a wench.
933
00:58:08,402 --> 00:58:11,322
And the winner is GEK the GEK!
934
00:58:12,948 --> 00:58:14,658
Okay, the next event,
935
00:58:14,742 --> 00:58:16,118
the next fight,
936
00:58:16,202 --> 00:58:19,079
with public participation.
937
00:58:19,538 --> 00:58:22,041
Here's the fabulous, the only...
938
00:58:23,250 --> 00:58:26,003
Thumbelina!
939
00:58:26,086 --> 00:58:27,838
- Thumbelina!
- ♪ My name is Thumbelina ♪
940
00:58:27,922 --> 00:58:31,175
- ♪ I'm three feet tall... ♪
- Oh, my God, she's so cute.
941
00:58:31,258 --> 00:58:32,635
Hey, what is he saying?
942
00:58:33,928 --> 00:58:36,847
He wants to know if
anyone'll fight Thumbelina.
943
00:58:36,931 --> 00:58:40,184
What? No, she's like a
delicate little flower.
944
00:58:40,267 --> 00:58:42,811
These people can't fight her.
I'll do it! I will do it.
945
00:58:42,895 --> 00:58:44,664
- It's gonna be fine. I'll be fine.
- No, no, no.
946
00:58:44,688 --> 00:58:47,024
- We have a challenger.
- I'll do it.
947
00:58:47,107 --> 00:58:48,734
This is a terrible idea. Ah!
948
00:58:48,817 --> 00:58:50,778
Hi. Hi.
949
00:58:50,861 --> 00:58:52,863
- Hi.
- Aw, I'm Abby.
950
00:58:52,947 --> 00:58:55,241
- Aw!
- I told you it was gonna be fine.
951
00:58:55,324 --> 00:58:57,451
She's cute.
952
00:58:57,534 --> 00:58:59,620
Okay, so, uh... so
do I get a costume?
953
00:58:59,703 --> 00:59:01,830
She wants a costume!
954
00:59:01,914 --> 00:59:03,141
Sure, sure. Come on.
955
00:59:03,165 --> 00:59:06,919
Oh, you're good. You're
good, Shep. You're good.
956
00:59:07,002 --> 00:59:10,547
It's just a stupid, stupid
little chicken, okay?
957
00:59:10,631 --> 00:59:12,925
Okay, okay.
958
00:59:13,884 --> 00:59:16,887
All right. Get it together.
Get it together. Get...
959
00:59:17,680 --> 00:59:19,390
My favorite rooster!
960
00:59:21,308 --> 00:59:23,227
No, no, no.
961
00:59:23,310 --> 00:59:24,979
No!
962
00:59:25,980 --> 00:59:27,898
Look at his little feet.
963
00:59:28,899 --> 00:59:30,818
Where's the humanity?
964
00:59:32,319 --> 00:59:35,364
You people are
sick! You did this!
965
00:59:35,447 --> 00:59:40,077
You did this to your child!
How do you feel about that?
966
00:59:40,619 --> 00:59:42,329
He's an animal of love.
967
00:59:51,630 --> 00:59:53,382
This is sick fuck.
968
00:59:54,341 --> 00:59:55,843
Not on my watch.
969
00:59:56,468 --> 00:59:57,845
You.
970
00:59:57,928 --> 01:00:02,266
And now from the United
States, Abby Abernathy!
971
01:00:06,478 --> 01:00:08,522
- You okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
972
01:00:08,605 --> 01:00:11,108
Listen very carefully
to the rules, all right?
973
01:00:11,191 --> 01:00:12,943
- Okay.
- There are no rules.
974
01:00:14,069 --> 01:00:15,112
Go!
975
01:00:16,864 --> 01:00:18,115
Meow.
976
01:00:18,198 --> 01:00:20,284
A cat.
977
01:00:20,367 --> 01:00:22,995
- Ow!
- Oh, my... Jesus.
978
01:00:23,746 --> 01:00:25,456
- You bitch!
- Ow!
979
01:00:27,333 --> 01:00:29,209
- What's happening?
- Come here!
980
01:00:32,338 --> 01:00:35,132
- Oh, God.
- Okay. Truce?
981
01:00:49,563 --> 01:00:52,941
- Will you tell me that's not Abby?
- It's definitely Abby.
982
01:00:57,029 --> 01:00:59,239
All right, all right,
all right, all right.
983
01:01:00,574 --> 01:01:02,618
Oh, God. Oh, hi, honey.
984
01:01:03,702 --> 01:01:07,414
- Okay.
- What happened to mani-pedis?
985
01:01:07,498 --> 01:01:09,458
I could really use
your advice right now.
986
01:01:09,541 --> 01:01:13,337
Okay, okay, um... Well, she's
favoring her right knee.
987
01:01:13,420 --> 01:01:15,672
- Go for her knee.
- No, that's so mean.
988
01:01:15,756 --> 01:01:17,674
It's really mean, but
it might save your life.
989
01:01:17,758 --> 01:01:20,636
Sorpresa!
990
01:01:20,719 --> 01:01:23,347
Don't listen to her. She's trying
to get in your head. Look at me.
991
01:01:23,430 --> 01:01:24,973
Okay, okay.
992
01:01:25,057 --> 01:01:27,476
What's happening,
English-speaking woman?
993
01:01:27,559 --> 01:01:30,145
- What are you doing?
- Nothing.
994
01:01:31,021 --> 01:01:33,357
Your boyfriend
is very handsome.
995
01:01:33,440 --> 01:01:36,610
- She's trying to fuck you.
- I... I don't know. I'm gonna go.
996
01:01:37,569 --> 01:01:39,947
- Listen here...
- Hasta la vista, fatty!
997
01:01:40,030 --> 01:01:41,490
Fatty?
998
01:01:42,616 --> 01:01:44,827
- I think you dropped something.
- Huh?
999
01:01:45,953 --> 01:01:47,496
- My leg!
- Yeah!
1000
01:01:49,790 --> 01:01:52,501
That's what you get for
trying to fuck my husband!
1001
01:01:52,584 --> 01:01:55,504
Yeah. Oh, some Mario shit.
1002
01:01:55,587 --> 01:01:58,924
Slam her! Yes! I don't know
what's legal. Do whatever.
1003
01:02:01,051 --> 01:02:03,053
Just do it!
1004
01:02:04,680 --> 01:02:07,808
Mama!
1005
01:02:07,891 --> 01:02:09,560
My tiny leg!
1006
01:02:09,643 --> 01:02:12,563
- I am immensely turned on by you.
- Uncle! Uncle!
1007
01:02:14,982 --> 01:02:17,067
- Yeah!
- Yes!
1008
01:02:18,735 --> 01:02:22,489
I can't believe you did it.
You were awesome! You won!
1009
01:02:22,573 --> 01:02:24,658
All right, baby. Have fun
at your bachelor party!
1010
01:02:24,741 --> 01:02:27,744
All right! I love you! Have fun!
1011
01:02:28,662 --> 01:02:32,416
♪ There's a cabin in
the town In the town ♪
1012
01:02:32,499 --> 01:02:36,086
♪ Where my sweet love sits
me down Sits me down ♪
1013
01:02:36,170 --> 01:02:40,090
♪ And drinks her wine
as merry as can be ♪
1014
01:02:40,174 --> 01:02:42,843
♪ Never, never thinks of me ♪
1015
01:02:42,926 --> 01:02:45,179
Whoa. Looks like the
power's out again.
1016
01:02:45,262 --> 01:02:46,722
Sorpresa!
1017
01:02:49,183 --> 01:02:51,852
What's with all the
eye candy? I'm married.
1018
01:02:51,935 --> 01:02:54,855
- You are.
- But we're not.
1019
01:02:55,689 --> 01:02:58,817
Don't get any cute ideas.
Abby's our sister now.
1020
01:02:58,901 --> 01:03:01,570
Yeah. I'll have to agree
with him on that one.
1021
01:03:17,711 --> 01:03:22,799
I mean, I love him. That's
gotta be worth something, right?
1022
01:03:23,717 --> 01:03:25,385
Yeah, absolutely.
1023
01:03:26,845 --> 01:03:29,848
- I don't know what love is anymore.
- Uh-oh.
1024
01:03:31,141 --> 01:03:33,185
Have you eaten anything today?
1025
01:03:33,268 --> 01:03:34,353
I'm full...
1026
01:03:35,354 --> 01:03:37,606
of rage!
1027
01:03:38,565 --> 01:03:41,777
Here's the thing, girls. I
got married too fucking young.
1028
01:03:41,860 --> 01:03:45,155
It didn't work out, you know?
What are you gonna fucking do?
1029
01:03:45,239 --> 01:03:48,075
What do you mean, what am I
gonna fucking do? I'm already...
1030
01:03:48,158 --> 01:03:49,868
Oh, look, I'm peeing.
1031
01:03:51,995 --> 01:03:55,582
- I'm never getting married.
- Listen.
1032
01:03:55,666 --> 01:03:58,794
The stats are not
in your favor, okay?
1033
01:03:58,877 --> 01:04:00,671
And by the way, hey, listen.
1034
01:04:00,754 --> 01:04:05,592
Hey, it's not like you came into
any assets or anything, right? So...
1035
01:04:05,676 --> 01:04:09,596
And there are no kids
involved. So, you got that.
1036
01:04:09,680 --> 01:04:13,308
I'm gonna have a baby
on my own. Millicent.
1037
01:04:14,142 --> 01:04:17,354
Just buy one. They're
more grateful.
1038
01:04:23,527 --> 01:04:25,237
Okay. Shit.
1039
01:04:25,320 --> 01:04:28,615
Okay, I got you... I
got you food. Oh, oh.
1040
01:04:30,701 --> 01:04:33,370
This looks so good, guys.
1041
01:04:33,453 --> 01:04:34,663
All right.
1042
01:04:36,081 --> 01:04:39,334
Mmm! You're free now, yeah.
1043
01:04:41,628 --> 01:04:46,049
Ooh, you hungry? Yeah. Ooh!
1044
01:04:46,133 --> 01:04:47,551
Bon appétit.
1045
01:04:48,427 --> 01:04:50,971
Mmm! Yeah, come on.
1046
01:04:51,054 --> 01:04:54,141
What? The food's over here.
Here you go. Yeah, you can eat.
1047
01:04:54,224 --> 01:04:57,769
No, no, no. Hey, hey, hey.
1048
01:04:57,853 --> 01:04:58,854
Cease!
1049
01:04:58,937 --> 01:05:00,063
Para! Para! Para!
1050
01:05:02,691 --> 01:05:06,737
Para! Stop! Stop!
Para! Para! Para!
1051
01:05:08,238 --> 01:05:10,616
Guys, just be friends,
just be friends!
1052
01:05:13,243 --> 01:05:15,954
No! No! No!
1053
01:05:24,046 --> 01:05:26,882
I'm an exchange student!
1054
01:05:26,965 --> 01:05:28,133
Help me!
1055
01:05:37,643 --> 01:05:39,478
- Oh!
- I got you!
1056
01:05:39,686 --> 01:05:41,271
- I got you.
- You got me.
1057
01:05:41,355 --> 01:05:43,315
- I love you so much.
- Okay, come on, let's go.
1058
01:05:43,398 --> 01:05:45,043
- You're such a good friend.
- I know. I love you very much.
1059
01:05:45,067 --> 01:05:48,278
- Who needs Shep? Here we go.
- No one needs him. I love you.
1060
01:05:48,362 --> 01:05:51,990
- Here we go. Where's the waterbed?
- Okay, okay. No, it's not a waterbed.
1061
01:05:52,074 --> 01:05:54,660
You know, lady, I love you too.
I think we're good together.
1062
01:05:54,743 --> 01:05:58,497
No. I... I just need to know
if Darius made his flight.
1063
01:05:59,831 --> 01:06:03,293
What are you looking at? I don't
give a fuck about Abby anymore.
1064
01:06:03,377 --> 01:06:04,836
I just want Darius.
1065
01:06:05,879 --> 01:06:08,465
What do you mean, he cashed
his ticket in? No, no, no!
1066
01:06:08,548 --> 01:06:10,926
Those are my miles!
That's my money!
1067
01:06:12,094 --> 01:06:15,931
I work my whole fucking life to
build a nest egg of money and love.
1068
01:06:16,014 --> 01:06:19,393
And what's the point if you keep
losing the nest egg and the love?
1069
01:06:20,268 --> 01:06:22,396
Help me!
1070
01:06:23,897 --> 01:06:26,191
Oh!
1071
01:06:30,737 --> 01:06:33,949
Oh, no, no, no. No!
1072
01:06:34,032 --> 01:06:35,701
Hi, Shepley, baby. It's Mom.
1073
01:06:35,784 --> 01:06:39,538
- I'm at hospice with Granny.
- Mommy, yes, it's me!
1074
01:06:39,621 --> 01:06:41,891
We're about to pull the plug
and she wanted to say goodbye.
1075
01:06:41,915 --> 01:06:43,834
- No, Grandma!
- Where are you?
1076
01:06:43,917 --> 01:06:45,293
No, Grandma!
1077
01:06:48,046 --> 01:06:51,883
Shepley, it's Granny. I
just wanted to tell you I...
1078
01:06:51,967 --> 01:06:53,844
No!
1079
01:06:53,927 --> 01:06:57,097
No! Goodbye, Granny!
1080
01:07:06,314 --> 01:07:10,777
No, I don't like those.
I like Pino. Pino!
1081
01:07:12,529 --> 01:07:14,948
Guys! Oh, they'll
never believe me.
1082
01:07:27,711 --> 01:07:29,129
Guess who?
1083
01:07:30,672 --> 01:07:32,299
Remember us?
1084
01:07:32,382 --> 01:07:33,382
Raar.
1085
01:07:33,967 --> 01:07:35,886
You learn English fast.
1086
01:07:35,969 --> 01:07:38,138
I learn a lot of things fast.
1087
01:07:38,221 --> 01:07:40,474
Isn't this your bachelor party?
1088
01:07:40,557 --> 01:07:44,478
Whoo. It sure is
my bachelor party.
1089
01:07:44,561 --> 01:07:46,980
So, don't you wanna
have some fun?
1090
01:07:47,063 --> 01:07:48,523
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
1091
01:07:48,607 --> 01:07:49,900
Let's have fun!
1092
01:07:49,983 --> 01:07:54,696
Okay. You know, um, I thought I
was having enough fun already.
1093
01:07:55,572 --> 01:07:56,990
You know what we mean.
1094
01:07:58,074 --> 01:08:00,160
Whoo!
1095
01:08:00,243 --> 01:08:02,621
We'll make it hard.
1096
01:08:02,704 --> 01:08:04,748
Away from Blondie.
1097
01:08:04,831 --> 01:08:06,458
You mean Abby, my wife.
1098
01:08:07,083 --> 01:08:10,086
Come on. We won't tell.
1099
01:08:16,593 --> 01:08:18,136
I gotta go.
1100
01:08:18,220 --> 01:08:20,430
Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.
1101
01:08:23,141 --> 01:08:24,434
Naughty, naughty.
1102
01:08:25,727 --> 01:08:27,938
Thank you for letting
us stay on the cot.
1103
01:08:28,021 --> 01:08:32,108
Yeah, well, okay,
ladies, it's been real.
1104
01:08:32,192 --> 01:08:35,111
Good luck with your
life, your marriage.
1105
01:08:35,195 --> 01:08:36,905
And if you were a gambler,
1106
01:08:36,988 --> 01:08:40,909
I would tell you that the odds
are not in your favor and to fold.
1107
01:08:40,992 --> 01:08:43,119
Wait, I have to pee.
Is this a bathroom?
1108
01:08:43,203 --> 01:08:45,539
Yeah. But no, no, no, no.
Don't... Don't go there.
1109
01:08:45,622 --> 01:08:48,041
That's Parker's room.
Just go in the pond.
1110
01:08:48,124 --> 01:08:49,376
Parker?
1111
01:08:49,459 --> 01:08:52,254
My son, the doctor that
we were talking about.
1112
01:08:52,337 --> 01:08:55,006
- What's your last name?
- Hayes.
1113
01:08:55,090 --> 01:08:56,925
Hayes.
1114
01:08:57,008 --> 01:08:58,969
Parker Hayes.
1115
01:08:59,052 --> 01:09:00,345
Doctor.
1116
01:09:02,138 --> 01:09:03,723
Hey, Parker!
1117
01:09:03,807 --> 01:09:05,100
Dr. Hayes.
1118
01:09:05,183 --> 01:09:07,018
Parker Hayes?
1119
01:09:07,102 --> 01:09:08,103
Parker!
1120
01:09:11,231 --> 01:09:13,567
Mare! Mare, we gotta go!
1121
01:09:23,618 --> 01:09:24,618
Ugh.
1122
01:09:26,663 --> 01:09:28,999
Travis.
1123
01:09:31,668 --> 01:09:32,836
Naughty, naughty.
1124
01:09:34,379 --> 01:09:36,298
Travis? Travis,
come and get me.
1125
01:09:39,050 --> 01:09:40,510
Travis!
1126
01:09:40,594 --> 01:09:42,137
- Asshole!
- You like that?
1127
01:09:42,220 --> 01:09:45,390
- Fine. Two can play at that.
- Oh, Travis, you're so good.
1128
01:09:58,069 --> 01:10:01,197
Okay, Parker. Okay, I'm just...
1129
01:10:02,240 --> 01:10:06,077
Shit. Okay, go. Wait. Okay.
1130
01:10:06,161 --> 01:10:07,287
Ow!
1131
01:10:08,580 --> 01:10:09,873
Ow.
1132
01:10:09,956 --> 01:10:13,585
Okay. Hi, Parker. Hi. Hi,
you old nice, boring man.
1133
01:10:13,668 --> 01:10:15,337
Okay, we're gonna take a photo.
1134
01:10:15,420 --> 01:10:17,964
Shit. What?
1135
01:10:21,843 --> 01:10:23,136
Good. Okay.
1136
01:10:34,397 --> 01:10:36,483
No! What are you doing? Don't...
1137
01:10:42,697 --> 01:10:46,743
Shh, shh, shh. Shh. Shh.
1138
01:10:48,495 --> 01:10:50,455
Goddammit!
1139
01:10:52,290 --> 01:10:54,459
How are you
sleeping? Roll over!
1140
01:10:54,542 --> 01:10:57,879
God, you're fucking
pointless. Roll over.
1141
01:10:58,546 --> 01:11:00,757
One.
1142
01:11:00,840 --> 01:11:03,343
Two.
1143
01:11:03,426 --> 01:11:06,346
Oh, oh, come on!
1144
01:11:06,429 --> 01:11:10,100
Come on. Ow! No!
1145
01:12:12,871 --> 01:12:15,457
What the hell happened in here?
1146
01:12:24,382 --> 01:12:25,717
Is that me?
1147
01:12:33,141 --> 01:12:34,726
So mean.
1148
01:12:35,643 --> 01:12:38,688
I am sorry, señor. There is
no one here by that name.
1149
01:12:38,772 --> 01:12:42,108
Or the other girls. Have you
tried calling the police?
1150
01:12:42,192 --> 01:12:44,861
Yeah, I don't think we're
there yet. Thank you, though.
1151
01:12:45,612 --> 01:12:46,821
Okay.
1152
01:13:34,327 --> 01:13:35,995
Mmm?
1153
01:14:10,196 --> 01:14:12,907
- Who the fuck are you?
- It's me! It's me!
1154
01:14:12,991 --> 01:14:15,910
- It's Abby! It's me!
- Abby? What are you doing here?
1155
01:14:15,994 --> 01:14:19,247
- I was just trying to take a selfie.
- A selfie? Fucking psycho.
1156
01:14:19,330 --> 01:14:20,707
Abby?
1157
01:14:20,790 --> 01:14:24,794
- Oh, God. He's gonna kill you.
- Abby, open up!
1158
01:14:24,878 --> 01:14:26,713
There's nobody here by
that name, so piss off!
1159
01:14:26,796 --> 01:14:30,466
- Shh!
- Oh, my God! You fucked Parker!
1160
01:14:33,052 --> 01:14:35,263
What are you doing here?
1161
01:14:35,346 --> 01:14:37,682
Nothing happened!
Nothing happened!
1162
01:14:48,568 --> 01:14:50,486
It's a madhouse!
1163
01:14:58,536 --> 01:15:01,956
Well? How's that for
your first time, Miguel?
1164
01:15:03,416 --> 01:15:08,296
Ain't she something else? Found her
in bed with her ex on our honeymoon.
1165
01:15:11,424 --> 01:15:13,676
It was really stupid.
1166
01:15:14,260 --> 01:15:17,972
I was drunk and trying to get
a selfie to make him jealous.
1167
01:15:18,056 --> 01:15:20,934
The only reason I
did it is because
1168
01:15:21,017 --> 01:15:25,146
I went to FaceTime Travis last
night and this is what I saw.
1169
01:15:28,566 --> 01:15:29,566
I...
1170
01:15:31,236 --> 01:15:32,737
Abby, I had nothing
to do with this.
1171
01:15:32,820 --> 01:15:34,447
You have to believe me.
1172
01:15:34,530 --> 01:15:35,531
I do.
1173
01:15:37,116 --> 01:15:40,161
I do. When I sobered up this
morning and I had a second to think,
1174
01:15:40,245 --> 01:15:42,538
I figured that, I don't know,
1175
01:15:42,622 --> 01:15:45,458
that some girls must have
taken your phone or something.
1176
01:15:45,541 --> 01:15:46,918
And that's the truth.
1177
01:15:48,586 --> 01:15:50,755
Right. I believe you.
1178
01:15:50,838 --> 01:15:53,299
You guys, there's...
there's hope in this.
1179
01:15:54,759 --> 01:15:58,763
Except that doesn't really go both
ways in our relationship now, does it?
1180
01:16:02,141 --> 01:16:06,604
Well... it's not really like
you gave me a fighting chance
1181
01:16:06,688 --> 01:16:09,023
with your marriage
annulment contest.
1182
01:16:11,067 --> 01:16:13,152
You set me up to fail.
1183
01:16:17,615 --> 01:16:20,535
Miguel, I know that you said that
there's something in Travis and I
1184
01:16:20,618 --> 01:16:21,911
that's worth fighting for,
1185
01:16:21,995 --> 01:16:25,915
but, you know, I don't really
think I have any fight left.
1186
01:16:28,501 --> 01:16:31,045
- Then neither do I.
- I...
1187
01:16:31,129 --> 01:16:32,255
Travis...
1188
01:16:36,509 --> 01:16:40,847
- Abby, Psalm 51 says create a...
- Save it. I'm done.
1189
01:16:53,776 --> 01:16:55,111
My mom knows someone
1190
01:16:55,194 --> 01:16:58,031
who can get us on a four o'clock
flight back to Sacramento.
1191
01:16:58,114 --> 01:17:02,118
Thanks, but I think I'm just
gonna hang around here, wander.
1192
01:17:02,201 --> 01:17:04,037
Don't wander too far.
1193
01:17:05,288 --> 01:17:09,250
- Promise?
- Yes. Yes, I promise, Mare.
1194
01:17:09,334 --> 01:17:10,668
But enough about me.
1195
01:17:10,752 --> 01:17:14,005
- How are you doing?
- This is so weird, Abby.
1196
01:17:14,088 --> 01:17:16,549
The second I met Shepley,
I just fell so hard.
1197
01:17:16,632 --> 01:17:18,718
And we get here, and I
feel like I'm just seeing
1198
01:17:18,801 --> 01:17:20,470
who he really is
for the first time.
1199
01:17:20,553 --> 01:17:24,599
- Yeah, sounds familiar.
- I mean, he hunts, he spies on me.
1200
01:17:25,391 --> 01:17:28,561
I just can't. He's
not right for me.
1201
01:17:31,397 --> 01:17:32,607
I hear you.
1202
01:17:32,690 --> 01:17:35,401
I thought maybe
Travis was different,
1203
01:17:35,485 --> 01:17:38,446
but he's just like all
the men from my past.
1204
01:17:38,529 --> 01:17:40,281
I mean, I don't know
what to say, Mare.
1205
01:17:40,365 --> 01:17:43,159
I guess we were both
just dealt a really...
1206
01:17:45,286 --> 01:17:47,413
Hello? Abby?
1207
01:17:52,627 --> 01:17:55,797
I wanna see the two of you
in my office in an hour,
1208
01:17:55,880 --> 01:17:58,424
and don't you even
think of skipping town.
1209
01:17:59,717 --> 01:18:04,972
This is about Travis assuming your
debt by fighting against Chernobyl.
1210
01:18:51,769 --> 01:18:54,355
Abby, it's not what you think!
1211
01:18:57,650 --> 01:18:59,902
- I fucking hate you!
- I don't hit women.
1212
01:18:59,986 --> 01:19:01,821
Motherfucker!
1213
01:19:04,323 --> 01:19:07,827
- You said you wouldn't do anything!
- God, you're firm.
1214
01:19:07,910 --> 01:19:11,205
I fucking hate you,
you maggot dick!
1215
01:19:11,289 --> 01:19:14,459
- What are you, hormonal?
- Fuck you!
1216
01:19:17,503 --> 01:19:18,671
Who is it?
1217
01:19:22,425 --> 01:19:24,760
What... What do you want?
1218
01:19:35,313 --> 01:19:37,565
I'm sorry about your painting.
1219
01:19:39,317 --> 01:19:42,987
Sorry about fucking
up your life, ish.
1220
01:19:45,656 --> 01:19:51,120
You didn't fuck up my life. You
fucked up my relationship with my dad.
1221
01:19:51,204 --> 01:19:53,706
There were some other things.
1222
01:19:53,789 --> 01:19:56,250
- Toledo.
- Hmm.
1223
01:19:56,334 --> 01:19:59,545
Toledo? Dude, I was 14.
1224
01:19:59,629 --> 01:20:01,672
You were a cash cow.
1225
01:20:01,756 --> 01:20:04,425
You really did deserve
that rock to the head.
1226
01:20:06,469 --> 01:20:08,262
I'm sorry about...
1227
01:20:08,346 --> 01:20:10,056
- Darius?
- Yeah.
1228
01:20:10,139 --> 01:20:13,184
I don't even know if he
ever really loved me.
1229
01:20:13,267 --> 01:20:16,896
This painting was my last-ditch
effort, 'cause we were down...
1230
01:20:16,979 --> 01:20:18,397
Doesn't matter.
1231
01:20:21,609 --> 01:20:25,112
Well, for what it's worth, it's not
like my relationship is any better.
1232
01:20:25,196 --> 01:20:28,324
I'm about to be
a divorcée at 19.
1233
01:20:28,407 --> 01:20:29,951
- What?
- Yeah.
1234
01:20:30,743 --> 01:20:34,789
For somebody who is so good at
cards, you are a real fuckin' idiot.
1235
01:20:34,872 --> 01:20:37,667
- Excuse me?
- Oh, yeah, right, Miss Wisdom at 19.
1236
01:20:37,750 --> 01:20:39,877
You don't see what's staring
you right in the face.
1237
01:20:39,961 --> 01:20:42,380
Love, Abby. Love.
1238
01:20:42,463 --> 01:20:46,551
Your guy, this guy, the fighter,
Travis, and the passion you two have.
1239
01:20:46,634 --> 01:20:49,845
You think you can buy that
on Amazon? You cannot.
1240
01:20:49,929 --> 01:20:54,433
I don't care if you're 19 or you're
90. When that happens, sha-bam!
1241
01:20:57,436 --> 01:21:00,064
- Sha-bam?
- Sha-bam!
1242
01:21:03,776 --> 01:21:06,112
- Sha-bam.
- Fuckin' sha-bam.
1243
01:21:07,488 --> 01:21:10,157
- What do you guys want?
- We want you to fight for her.
1244
01:21:10,241 --> 01:21:13,452
- You don't think I'm trying?
- Then, dude, try fuckin' harder.
1245
01:21:13,536 --> 01:21:16,581
It's like Dad always said, "Sometimes
you have to fight for both of you
1246
01:21:16,664 --> 01:21:17,707
when one of you gives up."
1247
01:21:17,790 --> 01:21:20,209
That's right. You fight and you
fight, and you keep fighting.
1248
01:21:20,293 --> 01:21:23,004
'Cause you're a Maddox, and
that's what we do for love.
1249
01:21:23,087 --> 01:21:25,214
Travis, do you love her?
1250
01:21:26,465 --> 01:21:28,217
Of course I love her.
1251
01:21:29,343 --> 01:21:31,470
Then go and get her, dude.
1252
01:21:32,680 --> 01:21:34,098
I don't even know where she is.
1253
01:21:34,181 --> 01:21:36,475
- I think she found you, bro.
- What?
1254
01:21:39,186 --> 01:21:41,939
♪ With all the ground
we've covered ♪
1255
01:21:42,315 --> 01:21:45,359
♪ With all the
fights we've won ♪
1256
01:21:45,443 --> 01:21:48,988
♪ I won't let you
drown in the ocean ♪
1257
01:21:49,071 --> 01:21:52,241
♪ I won't watch you
burn in the sun ♪
1258
01:21:52,325 --> 01:21:54,160
♪ We'll sing it in a song ♪
1259
01:21:55,703 --> 01:21:59,540
♪ We'll sing it in a song ♪
1260
01:21:59,624 --> 01:22:02,918
♪ In all the seas
we've sailed on ♪
1261
01:22:03,002 --> 01:22:06,088
♪ Our faces turned to stone ♪
1262
01:22:06,172 --> 01:22:09,884
♪ I will follow you
where the light goes ♪
1263
01:22:09,967 --> 01:22:12,428
♪ And tell the rights
we've wronged ♪
1264
01:22:12,511 --> 01:22:15,973
♪ And sing it in a
song Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
1265
01:22:16,057 --> 01:22:20,686
♪ Sing it in a song ♪
1266
01:22:20,770 --> 01:22:24,315
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
1267
01:22:24,398 --> 01:22:30,363
♪ The greatest
story never told ♪
1268
01:22:31,280 --> 01:22:33,157
♪ Our finest dreams ♪
1269
01:22:33,240 --> 01:22:38,037
♪ Our hearts and souls ♪
1270
01:22:38,120 --> 01:22:43,542
♪ Forever young, forever bold ♪
1271
01:22:44,960 --> 01:22:48,798
♪ The greatest
story never told ♪
1272
01:22:54,095 --> 01:22:56,389
Where did you get these
suits, Douchebags-R-Us?
1273
01:22:56,472 --> 01:22:57,932
- They're traditional.
- Really?
1274
01:22:58,015 --> 01:23:01,060
Did you get these suits with a sign
that reads "Please don't fuck me"?
1275
01:23:01,143 --> 01:23:03,604
He's a fucking priest.
Have some respect!
1276
01:23:06,774 --> 01:23:08,484
No biting!
1277
01:23:08,567 --> 01:23:11,445
Queso!
1278
01:23:24,041 --> 01:23:27,878
This is the ring that our
father got our mother,
1279
01:23:27,962 --> 01:23:33,509
and, uh, she passed before Travis
really got to ever know her.
1280
01:23:34,593 --> 01:23:36,512
But it's special.
1281
01:23:36,595 --> 01:23:39,682
And you're special.
1282
01:23:39,765 --> 01:23:44,603
We'd like you to have it, 'cause
we all love you very much.
1283
01:23:46,021 --> 01:23:47,898
This is beautiful.
1284
01:23:49,150 --> 01:23:51,068
I just wish that I could
have met her, you guys.
1285
01:23:51,152 --> 01:23:54,238
But I'm sure she
was so incredible.
1286
01:23:55,906 --> 01:23:58,492
I don't even know what to say.
1287
01:23:58,576 --> 01:24:01,704
Well, you... you could say yes.
1288
01:24:01,787 --> 01:24:03,748
Yes, yes, yeah.
1289
01:24:04,790 --> 01:24:07,960
I'll cherish this forever.
Thank you guys so much.
1290
01:24:08,711 --> 01:24:11,714
I'm really proud to call
you guys my brothers.
1291
01:24:14,842 --> 01:24:16,343
Hey!
1292
01:24:17,553 --> 01:24:19,472
What are guys doing to her?
1293
01:24:27,354 --> 01:24:29,064
♪ Right from the start ♪
1294
01:24:29,148 --> 01:24:32,026
♪ We knew we'd be together... ♪
1295
01:24:32,985 --> 01:24:34,987
Tried the Trabby?
1296
01:24:35,070 --> 01:24:36,155
Hey!
1297
01:24:36,238 --> 01:24:40,117
Yeah. Yeah, I've had, like, three.
They're great. They're great.
1298
01:24:40,201 --> 01:24:43,788
- You should get one, man.
- All right, I'll have one.
1299
01:24:47,416 --> 01:24:50,336
- Did you talk to Mare?
- Mare? Uh...
1300
01:24:52,963 --> 01:24:54,673
You all right?
1301
01:24:59,011 --> 01:25:01,931
Yeah, I mean, it doesn't
matter. It's your night, man.
1302
01:25:02,014 --> 01:25:04,225
- It's your night.
- Cheers. Shep, I love you.
1303
01:25:04,308 --> 01:25:08,062
I love... Well, stop. I love...
Dude, I love you. I love you so much.
1304
01:25:08,145 --> 01:25:12,066
- No, but, seriously, I love you.
- I love you more, bro. For real.
1305
01:25:12,149 --> 01:25:13,692
I would leave her
tonight for you.
1306
01:25:13,776 --> 01:25:16,946
If it weren't for the whole cousin
inbreeding thing, we could have something.
1307
01:25:17,029 --> 01:25:20,115
Come here. Come here.
1308
01:25:20,199 --> 01:25:24,036
I'm so happy for you. Now,
you should find your wife.
1309
01:25:24,119 --> 01:25:26,038
- That's weird to say.
- I know.
1310
01:25:26,121 --> 01:25:28,249
- You good?
- I'm good. I'm good. I'm good.
1311
01:25:28,332 --> 01:25:29,458
- Okay.
- I'm good.
1312
01:25:35,005 --> 01:25:39,593
Hey, what's... what's the
Shepmare? Can I have one of those?
1313
01:25:39,677 --> 01:25:44,431
- You tell me.
- Oh, my... Oh, my... Baby!
1314
01:25:44,515 --> 01:25:47,017
- Babe! Oh, my God! Come here, come here.
- I came back!
1315
01:25:47,101 --> 01:25:51,146
- Pumpkin! Pumpkin! I missed you!
- I missed you too!
1316
01:25:51,230 --> 01:25:54,066
I was at the spa and heard that
someone tried to free the roosters
1317
01:25:54,149 --> 01:25:55,710
but didn't realize that
they're trained killers.
1318
01:25:55,734 --> 01:25:58,112
- I didn't know they were killers!
- Did you do that?
1319
01:25:58,195 --> 01:26:03,409
Yeah, I was just trying to be a nice guy,
and they're not... they're not nice. No.
1320
01:26:03,492 --> 01:26:06,829
You're a good man, Shepley
Maddox, and I've been such a jerk.
1321
01:26:06,912 --> 01:26:09,164
I spun out about a dumb
thing and I shut down...
1322
01:26:09,248 --> 01:26:10,708
- Stop, stop, stop.
- I'm so sorry.
1323
01:26:10,791 --> 01:26:14,503
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry for spying on you.
- I love you so much.
1324
01:26:14,587 --> 01:26:18,215
- I love you so much, baby.
- And I wanna be your baby pterodactyl.
1325
01:26:18,299 --> 01:26:19,884
You wanna be my...
1326
01:26:21,302 --> 01:26:24,513
- I wanna be on your mantle!
- Come here, babe!
1327
01:26:31,186 --> 01:26:33,439
- Buenas noches.
- Hmm.
1328
01:26:34,231 --> 01:26:36,567
- Sancho, right?
- Sí.
1329
01:26:41,113 --> 01:26:43,782
I feel like I'm past my prime.
1330
01:26:43,866 --> 01:26:46,285
You're telling me!
1331
01:26:46,368 --> 01:26:49,330
- All I want to do is nap.
- Mmm.
1332
01:26:50,372 --> 01:26:54,335
I'd take a good nap over that
painting, meditation bullshit.
1333
01:26:57,630 --> 01:27:00,049
Money doesn't fix it.
1334
01:27:00,132 --> 01:27:01,717
Ass doesn't fix it.
1335
01:27:03,093 --> 01:27:04,093
Ass?
1336
01:27:05,137 --> 01:27:06,305
No bueno.
1337
01:27:07,264 --> 01:27:08,599
Pino's ass?
1338
01:27:09,892 --> 01:27:10,892
Tight.
1339
01:27:11,477 --> 01:27:12,895
Treacherous.
1340
01:27:15,898 --> 01:27:20,152
I just wanna find somebody to
sail off into the sunset with.
1341
01:27:20,235 --> 01:27:23,822
I mean, fuck a couple of people up
along the way, right, just for fun.
1342
01:27:23,906 --> 01:27:27,451
I like a man like you.
1343
01:27:27,534 --> 01:27:29,453
Masculine.
1344
01:27:34,583 --> 01:27:36,877
I've never tried Mexican.
1345
01:27:39,838 --> 01:27:44,051
I think that you would
find it most appealing.
1346
01:27:45,719 --> 01:27:48,597
♪ Falling in love again ♪
1347
01:27:49,598 --> 01:27:52,643
- Okay, so I've been thinking.
- Uh-oh.
1348
01:27:53,602 --> 01:27:56,647
I've been thinking about
giving the Maddox name a try.
1349
01:27:56,730 --> 01:27:59,858
But it has to include
some personalized towels.
1350
01:27:59,942 --> 01:28:01,652
- Towels?
- Mm-hmm.
1351
01:28:03,487 --> 01:28:05,322
Expensive towels.
1352
01:28:06,198 --> 01:28:09,618
- And how many points is that?
- Oh, forget about the points.
1353
01:28:09,702 --> 01:28:13,330
I stopped counting when we
were down by like a thousand.
1354
01:28:13,414 --> 01:28:15,290
A thousand's an exaggeration.
1355
01:28:15,374 --> 01:28:18,544
It was stupid anyway. I can't
rationalize this marriage.
1356
01:28:18,627 --> 01:28:23,090
And I can't rationalize
why I love you. But I do.
1357
01:28:26,635 --> 01:28:30,264
And so Abby and Travis agreed,
1358
01:28:30,347 --> 01:28:32,725
"Till death do us part."
1359
01:28:34,351 --> 01:28:37,312
As long as they don't
kill each other.
1360
01:28:37,396 --> 01:28:38,689
Adios, amigos!
1361
01:28:52,286 --> 01:28:53,537
Jesus, Roger!
1362
01:28:56,331 --> 01:28:58,333
Jesus Christ!
1363
01:34:13,148 --> 01:34:16,234
♪ My name is Thumbelina
I'm three feet tall ♪
1364
01:34:16,318 --> 01:34:19,613
♪ My mommy always told
me "Fuck, you're small" ♪
1365
01:34:19,696 --> 01:34:22,699
♪ My neighbors, they tease
me It sends me in a roll ♪
1366
01:34:22,783 --> 01:34:25,994
♪ I fuck them up for
money after all ♪
1367
01:34:26,078 --> 01:34:28,205
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