Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,061 --> 00:00:02,461
The following programme
contains strong language
2
00:00:02,501 --> 00:00:05,061
and adult humour from the start.
3
00:00:14,821 --> 00:00:16,821
Hey, Christoph, you...
4
00:00:18,821 --> 00:00:20,821
Hey, Vin.
You all right?
5
00:00:20,861 --> 00:00:22,861
Yeah. Fine, I'm fine.
6
00:00:22,901 --> 00:00:24,901
You look like shit, man.
7
00:00:24,941 --> 00:00:27,581
You see patients like that?
Yeah, you're right.
8
00:00:27,621 --> 00:00:29,621
I'm not sleeping.
Oh.
9
00:00:29,661 --> 00:00:31,861
Got a bifta on you?
You can't have a bifta at work.
10
00:00:31,901 --> 00:00:35,301
Fuckin' diagnosing people.
I can do that with my eyes closed.
11
00:00:35,341 --> 00:00:37,381
Go on, give us a...
Have you got a vape?
12
00:00:37,421 --> 00:00:39,621
One toot.
It's strong. Take it easy.
13
00:00:41,701 --> 00:00:44,341
Just a bit.
That's enough. That's a good amount.
14
00:00:44,381 --> 00:00:47,581
Fuck, dude. You're going to end up
throwing a whitey, man.
15
00:00:47,621 --> 00:00:50,941
That's enough. Your fucking eyes
are bulging out your head.
16
00:00:50,981 --> 00:00:53,101
What's going on with you?
17
00:00:53,141 --> 00:00:56,021
My ex. She's getting married again
next weekend.
18
00:00:56,061 --> 00:00:58,781
So, go on. What's the problem, then?
19
00:00:58,821 --> 00:01:01,981
Just making me reflect, Vin.
You know.
20
00:01:02,021 --> 00:01:04,661
I've been looking at myself
squarely in the face
21
00:01:04,701 --> 00:01:06,701
and saying -
What a wanker.
22
00:01:07,781 --> 00:01:10,141
Yeah. I mean, who are you?
I'm 50 years old.
23
00:01:10,181 --> 00:01:12,181
I'm just frittering my life away,
24
00:01:12,221 --> 00:01:15,221
bedding this endless parade
of fit young women.
25
00:01:15,261 --> 00:01:19,101
It's just a blur of knees
and blowjobs.
26
00:01:19,141 --> 00:01:21,421
It's all because of this.
It's so easy now with that.
27
00:01:21,461 --> 00:01:24,821
My life has become
one great big wet orgasm.
28
00:01:24,861 --> 00:01:26,861
God, how awful!
Thanks.
29
00:01:26,901 --> 00:01:28,901
Thanks for your sympathy.
30
00:01:28,941 --> 00:01:30,941
I listen to you week in, week out.
31
00:01:30,981 --> 00:01:33,101
When I've got a problem,
you're never -
32
00:01:33,141 --> 00:01:35,141
I'm sorry. And I really mean that.
33
00:01:35,181 --> 00:01:37,181
I know you love... Er... Maria.
34
00:01:37,221 --> 00:01:39,221
Melinda.
Melinda.
35
00:01:41,021 --> 00:01:44,581
If I had a flower
for every time I think of you,
36
00:01:44,621 --> 00:01:46,901
I'd walk in my garden forever.
37
00:01:48,781 --> 00:01:50,781
Tennyson. Poetry.
38
00:01:50,821 --> 00:01:52,821
It's intense.
39
00:01:52,861 --> 00:01:54,861
It was her favourite.
Mm.
40
00:01:54,901 --> 00:01:56,901
The human heart, eh?
41
00:01:56,941 --> 00:02:00,181
It's a capricious
and mercurial beast.
42
00:02:01,261 --> 00:02:03,221
Oh?
43
00:02:03,261 --> 00:02:05,261
Oh, she's nice.
No.
44
00:02:05,301 --> 00:02:07,301
Look at that. It's blonde.
45
00:02:07,341 --> 00:02:09,741
It's blonde.
Look at the mammaries on that!
46
00:02:09,781 --> 00:02:12,101
All right!
You fucking sociopath, Chris.
47
00:02:12,141 --> 00:02:14,861
I'm doing all right.
- Bipolar's good.
- Keen hiker.
48
00:02:14,901 --> 00:02:19,661
You're so unprofessional, dude.
You get on my fucking...tits.
49
00:02:19,701 --> 00:02:22,341
You all right, Mr Bishop?
Yeah, good, good. You?
50
00:02:22,381 --> 00:02:24,501
Done summat to your hand?
No. Nothing.
51
00:02:24,541 --> 00:02:27,181
You're being a bit sheepish.
What have you done?
52
00:02:27,221 --> 00:02:29,221
Nothing.
Oh, come 'ed.
53
00:02:29,261 --> 00:02:31,261
Go on.
54
00:02:31,301 --> 00:02:33,341
All right,
but you can't laugh, yeah?
55
00:02:33,381 --> 00:02:35,381
Yeah.
Promise?
56
00:02:35,421 --> 00:02:37,421
Yeah, I do.
57
00:02:39,461 --> 00:02:41,461
Ooh!
58
00:02:41,501 --> 00:02:43,501
Yeah, all right.
59
00:02:43,541 --> 00:02:45,541
Fuck, what have you done?!
60
00:02:45,581 --> 00:02:47,581
An accident with the fish.
61
00:02:47,621 --> 00:02:49,621
What do you mean, with the fish?
62
00:02:49,661 --> 00:02:52,381
Are you trying to say
I've been fingering my fish?
63
00:02:52,421 --> 00:02:54,421
What else... What else could it be?
64
00:02:54,461 --> 00:02:56,701
You couldn't even...
Their arses are...
65
00:02:56,741 --> 00:02:58,741
It's you that suggested fingering -
66
00:02:58,781 --> 00:03:01,741
You're the one doing the gesturing!
What's that?
67
00:03:01,781 --> 00:03:05,021
Fuck's sake, dude! That woman's
really... She's heard that.
68
00:03:05,061 --> 00:03:06,341
Fine.
69
00:03:06,381 --> 00:03:08,701
Goodbye.
Goodbye to you.
70
00:03:13,261 --> 00:03:15,261
Sorry.
71
00:03:17,701 --> 00:03:21,141
Bollocks!
What does he fucking want? Hello?
72
00:03:21,181 --> 00:03:23,181
Are you still a petty criminal?
73
00:03:23,221 --> 00:03:25,621
Cheeky bastard!
I'm a professional thief.
74
00:03:25,661 --> 00:03:27,661
I want to hire you.
75
00:03:27,701 --> 00:03:29,701
Hm?
76
00:03:31,261 --> 00:03:33,301
Go on, then.
What can we help you with?
77
00:03:33,341 --> 00:03:35,341
Business, Vinnie.
78
00:03:35,381 --> 00:03:37,701
I hear you're a man
that can get things done.
79
00:03:37,741 --> 00:03:41,661
As you're already aware, my ex-wife
is an unpleasant woman.
80
00:03:41,701 --> 00:03:45,421
She's manipulative and conniving
and...sexually loose.
81
00:03:45,461 --> 00:03:47,061
I can testify to that.
82
00:03:47,101 --> 00:03:49,941
We are still engaged in a bitter
and acrimonious divorce battle.
83
00:03:49,981 --> 00:03:52,541
Still?
Still. It's at an impass-ey.
84
00:03:52,581 --> 00:03:54,581
Impass.
85
00:03:54,621 --> 00:03:57,621
That bitch has got my house,
my kids, and half my money.
86
00:03:57,661 --> 00:03:59,661
And I tolerated it. Ha ha!
87
00:03:59,701 --> 00:04:02,221
I was being the height
of fucking reasonable.
88
00:04:02,261 --> 00:04:04,781
But now she's gone too far.
Now she's involved
89
00:04:04,821 --> 00:04:07,821
three beautiful and innocent ladies
that have got nothing to do with it.
90
00:04:07,861 --> 00:04:09,861
Which ladies?
91
00:04:11,421 --> 00:04:13,421
My classic cars.
Ooh!
92
00:04:13,461 --> 00:04:15,901
I registered them all in her name.
Tax dodge.
93
00:04:15,941 --> 00:04:19,181
Now she's only gone and fucking
sold them for a pound apiece
94
00:04:19,221 --> 00:04:21,221
to her new boyfriend.
95
00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:23,261
It's not about the money, Vin. It...
96
00:04:26,061 --> 00:04:28,621
I... I just want them cars!
97
00:04:28,661 --> 00:04:30,781
What are you doing,
pretending to cry?
98
00:04:30,821 --> 00:04:33,661
Trying to cry there?
Your missus tried to do that...
99
00:04:33,781 --> 00:04:36,381
Remember his missus trying to cry?
100
00:04:36,421 --> 00:04:39,541
All right, look, I just love
the cars and I want them back.
101
00:04:39,581 --> 00:04:42,581
All right. Where are they
and who's the new boyfriend?
102
00:04:42,621 --> 00:04:46,061
I've no idea. But whoever he is,
he must be blind and deaf and...
103
00:04:46,101 --> 00:04:49,221
..like getting slobbery blowjobs
from a halitosis gob.
104
00:04:49,261 --> 00:04:51,381
I actually found her
surprisingly fragrant.
105
00:04:51,421 --> 00:04:54,221
This whole thing could just be
a ruse to piss me off.
106
00:04:54,261 --> 00:04:57,061
But it's possible she has sold them.
107
00:04:57,101 --> 00:04:59,141
All right, we'll get them back
for you.
108
00:04:59,181 --> 00:05:01,621
But that's not enough.
No, this now.
109
00:05:01,661 --> 00:05:04,661
And the same again when the cars
are back in my possession. Deal?
110
00:05:04,701 --> 00:05:06,741
It's not enough.
You don't know how much is there.
111
00:05:06,781 --> 00:05:08,381
How much is there?
Loads.
112
00:05:08,421 --> 00:05:10,421
Nailed it, Dylan.
113
00:05:11,581 --> 00:05:14,301
All right, misery bollocks,
who do you want to be?
114
00:05:14,341 --> 00:05:16,461
Good cop or bad cop?
I'm done with cops.
115
00:05:16,501 --> 00:05:19,101
No-one does it properly. Let's find
out who this boyfriend is.
116
00:05:19,141 --> 00:05:21,141
You're miserable today.
117
00:05:21,181 --> 00:05:23,181
Miserable.
118
00:05:27,181 --> 00:05:29,181
Hello, boys.
You all right, love?
119
00:05:29,221 --> 00:05:31,221
Yeah.
Go and get your mam, will you?
120
00:05:31,261 --> 00:05:33,261
Mum!
121
00:05:33,301 --> 00:05:39,181
Oh, wow. If it isn't
the useless fish killers.
122
00:05:39,221 --> 00:05:41,461
What do you two want?
Hello, Daphne.
123
00:05:41,501 --> 00:05:44,461
Don't Daphne me. Has he sent you?
124
00:05:44,501 --> 00:05:46,981
What does he want this time?
Money related, no doubt.
125
00:05:47,021 --> 00:05:49,741
Yeah, a bit. Your husband,
he's getting a bit frustrated.
126
00:05:49,781 --> 00:05:52,221
This divorce, it's taking
a bit of doing, isn't it?
127
00:05:52,261 --> 00:05:54,181
He's sent us down.
In the spirit of goodwill.
128
00:05:54,221 --> 00:05:56,941
He just wants it over
so you can move on with your lives.
129
00:05:56,981 --> 00:06:00,301
He's got that lass from the shop.
That skinny Botox bitch?
130
00:06:00,341 --> 00:06:02,861
Yeah, her. And you've got
whoever you've got.
131
00:06:02,901 --> 00:06:06,141
I hope he's dead nice, an' all.
Found herself someone nice?
132
00:06:06,181 --> 00:06:08,181
Right, so that's it, is it?
133
00:06:08,221 --> 00:06:11,101
He wants to know
who the boyfriend is.
134
00:06:11,141 --> 00:06:14,461
Well, you can tell him from me
135
00:06:14,501 --> 00:06:19,661
that I am sucking the D-I-C-K
136
00:06:19,701 --> 00:06:22,581
of every eligible bachelor
in Hawley.
137
00:06:22,621 --> 00:06:24,621
Now piss off!
138
00:06:25,621 --> 00:06:27,621
Magenta.
139
00:06:27,661 --> 00:06:30,261
Right. Plan B, stakeout.
140
00:06:31,981 --> 00:06:33,981
Gis a light, will you?
141
00:06:34,021 --> 00:06:36,661
I grew that place, right?
142
00:06:36,701 --> 00:06:39,141
From a fucking spit and sawdust
strip club
143
00:06:39,181 --> 00:06:41,741
to a high-class
erotic establishment.
144
00:06:41,781 --> 00:06:43,781
And now she, Erin,
145
00:06:43,821 --> 00:06:45,821
thinks she can swan in
146
00:06:45,861 --> 00:06:49,501
and make it all feminist burlesque
and suffragette theme nights.
147
00:06:49,541 --> 00:06:52,781
You've got to move with the times.
That's what she's doing.
148
00:06:52,821 --> 00:06:54,821
No, no. I move with the times.
149
00:06:54,861 --> 00:06:56,901
I'm a rolling stone.
I gather no moss.
150
00:06:56,941 --> 00:06:59,821
Right.
Don't forget,
151
00:06:59,861 --> 00:07:01,861
I am as woke as the next man.
152
00:07:04,101 --> 00:07:07,421
Unless, of course, the next man
happens to be my Uncle Cyril.
153
00:07:07,461 --> 00:07:10,101
Who... Bless his heart, still enjoys
154
00:07:10,141 --> 00:07:12,181
rubbing up against people
on busy buses.
155
00:07:13,261 --> 00:07:15,261
Oi oi!
156
00:07:15,301 --> 00:07:17,301
She's on the move.
Yeah.
157
00:07:17,341 --> 00:07:20,221
And it looks like...
she is going golfing.
158
00:07:20,261 --> 00:07:23,101
Do make sure you get the enormous
bi-noc-ulars out.
159
00:07:23,141 --> 00:07:25,141
She's fucking right there!
160
00:07:25,181 --> 00:07:28,581
And there's no way she's going
bloody golfing in that outfit.
161
00:07:28,621 --> 00:07:30,621
Look at time of day it is!
162
00:07:30,661 --> 00:07:32,981
Maybe she enjoys a round
of twilight golf.
163
00:07:33,021 --> 00:07:35,221
Twilight golf,
that's not a thing, man.
164
00:07:35,261 --> 00:07:37,381
Of course it's a thing.
Everything's a thing.
165
00:07:37,421 --> 00:07:40,741
You think of a thing.
The weirdest thing you can think of.
166
00:07:42,781 --> 00:07:44,781
Pony Scrabble.
What?
167
00:07:44,821 --> 00:07:46,621
Pony Scrabble.
168
00:07:46,661 --> 00:07:49,501
That's not a fucking thing.
They haven't got hands.
169
00:07:53,621 --> 00:07:56,021
Genital chess.
Gen... Yes! That is a thing.
170
00:07:56,061 --> 00:07:58,781
Does everything have to come down
to sex with you?
171
00:07:58,821 --> 00:08:02,861
No, no, sunshine. There's plenty
of things that aren't sex-related.
172
00:08:04,501 --> 00:08:06,501
Go on, think of one, then.
Well, I will.
173
00:08:06,541 --> 00:08:08,541
There's...
174
00:08:09,501 --> 00:08:11,501
What is there? What is there?
175
00:08:11,541 --> 00:08:13,541
Yeah.
That isn't...
176
00:08:13,581 --> 00:08:15,581
Nice one. Well done, dickhead.
177
00:08:15,621 --> 00:08:17,621
Oh, shit!
178
00:08:17,661 --> 00:08:19,661
Here.
179
00:08:19,701 --> 00:08:21,701
There.
180
00:08:27,301 --> 00:08:29,101
♪ She likes the green
# Green
181
00:08:29,141 --> 00:08:30,541
♪ Grass
# Grass
182
00:08:30,581 --> 00:08:32,581
♪ Under her shoes
183
00:08:33,581 --> 00:08:36,301
♪ What can I lose
cos I got no dough
184
00:08:37,381 --> 00:08:39,381
♪ Oh, no?
185
00:08:39,421 --> 00:08:43,581
♪ I'm all alone when I lower my lamp
186
00:08:43,621 --> 00:08:47,021
♪ That's why the lady is a tramp ♪
187
00:08:55,741 --> 00:08:57,741
Hardwick.
188
00:08:57,781 --> 00:09:00,461
♪ That's why the lady is a tramp ♪
189
00:09:10,741 --> 00:09:12,741
Hardwick.
190
00:09:12,781 --> 00:09:15,981
They're mine. My pond, my balls.
191
00:09:16,021 --> 00:09:19,061
I... I found them.
In my pond.
192
00:09:19,101 --> 00:09:21,101
You fat fucking peasant!
193
00:09:22,981 --> 00:09:24,981
Lousy piece of shit.
194
00:09:25,021 --> 00:09:27,541
You know him?
You could say we've got history.
195
00:09:27,581 --> 00:09:29,701
He was horrible to my Cardi.
Come here.
196
00:09:29,741 --> 00:09:31,741
I'm fine.
Come here. Come to Mum.
197
00:09:31,781 --> 00:09:34,301
Isn't he married?
Yeah, to a fucking heiress.
198
00:09:34,341 --> 00:09:37,181
She's not an heiress.
Her dad runs Brisby Sausages.
199
00:09:37,221 --> 00:09:39,221
I think that makes her an heiress.
200
00:09:39,261 --> 00:09:42,061
Now he's sticking his pork banger
somewhere else.
201
00:09:42,101 --> 00:09:44,141
That's exactly why
we're going to screw him.
202
00:09:44,181 --> 00:09:46,621
How are we going to know
where he stores the cars?
203
00:09:46,661 --> 00:09:48,781
Dylan's right. They'll have garages.
204
00:09:48,821 --> 00:09:52,021
And they won't show it to you
unless you're an enthusiast.
205
00:09:52,061 --> 00:09:54,661
I was listening to a podcast
about the Amphibicar.
206
00:09:54,701 --> 00:09:57,621
Fucking hell! It's all fish, fish,
fish with you, isn't it?
207
00:09:57,661 --> 00:10:00,501
We need to get down to Russell's
bloody golf course.
208
00:10:00,541 --> 00:10:03,141
I need you two dressing up
as enthusiasts. Get him chatting.
209
00:10:03,181 --> 00:10:06,381
Find out where them cars are.
But Hardwick knows us, dude.
210
00:10:06,421 --> 00:10:07,621
He knows me and you.
211
00:10:07,661 --> 00:10:10,261
But he doesn't know Fat Ronaldo
and Captain Hansen, does he?
212
00:10:10,301 --> 00:10:13,701
How are we going to pose as car
enthusiasts without a classic car?
213
00:10:13,741 --> 00:10:15,341
My mum's got a really old car.
214
00:10:15,381 --> 00:10:18,341
What's the name of it? Triumph...
A fucking Triumph? Triumph Herald?
215
00:10:18,381 --> 00:10:21,381
Yeah, that's it.
My grandad left it to her.
216
00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:24,661
When she was emptying his
house out, she found animal porn.
217
00:10:24,701 --> 00:10:26,741
Which animal?
What does that matter?
218
00:10:26,781 --> 00:10:29,301
Just curious. Which animal?
It was hamsters.
219
00:10:29,341 --> 00:10:31,341
That's disgusting.
Can you get it?
220
00:10:31,381 --> 00:10:33,381
What, the porn?
The car!
221
00:10:33,421 --> 00:10:35,541
That would be worth seeing.
Don't see why not.
222
00:10:35,581 --> 00:10:37,981
It's just sitting there.
You've saved the bloody day!
223
00:10:38,021 --> 00:10:41,261
You angel! Take JJ. And if you can
find the porn for our Ashley,
224
00:10:41,301 --> 00:10:43,541
bring it, he's curious.
Who's that girl?
225
00:10:43,581 --> 00:10:46,221
Oh, yeah. She started last week.
Staring at you.
226
00:10:46,261 --> 00:10:48,261
No.
Shh!
227
00:10:48,301 --> 00:10:50,301
Ahem.
228
00:10:50,341 --> 00:10:52,381
Carol, you should have seen
her face. Boo!
229
00:10:52,421 --> 00:10:56,141
I said it's not Halloween yet. And
she said 'Maybe it is Halloween.'
230
00:10:56,181 --> 00:10:58,181
Did you see that?
Oh, piss off.
231
00:10:58,221 --> 00:11:00,221
Just go and talk to her.
And say what?
232
00:11:00,261 --> 00:11:02,261
Just say, like, hello.
233
00:11:02,301 --> 00:11:04,301
Talk to her like you talk
to one of us.
234
00:11:04,341 --> 00:11:06,341
Hey, how's it going?
235
00:11:06,381 --> 00:11:08,901
You and I should
just go for a coffee together.
236
00:11:08,941 --> 00:11:10,941
That does it.
Sexy, that.
237
00:11:10,981 --> 00:11:12,981
That was sexy. That whispery thing.
238
00:11:13,021 --> 00:11:16,221
I'm Vinnie. Do you want to go...
239
00:11:16,261 --> 00:11:18,581
..for a coffee?
Doesn't work.
240
00:11:18,621 --> 00:11:20,941
Maybe just leave it.
It is a shocker, like.
241
00:11:20,981 --> 00:11:23,821
You can piss clean off, Carol!
You stupid forehead!
242
00:11:23,861 --> 00:11:25,861
I'm going to have a stand-up wee.
243
00:11:29,501 --> 00:11:31,501
Right, well, there she is.
244
00:11:32,541 --> 00:11:34,541
She might not even start.
245
00:11:36,021 --> 00:11:38,781
We'll have to give her a bump-start.
246
00:11:38,821 --> 00:11:40,821
Ta-ra-ra bumpt-ee-eh!
247
00:11:42,901 --> 00:11:44,901
Not looking good, is it?
No.
248
00:11:44,941 --> 00:11:46,941
Can you do it up?
249
00:11:46,981 --> 00:11:49,621
Yeah. And a bloody wash
might make a difference.
250
00:11:49,661 --> 00:11:51,661
Just touch it up a bit.
Ooh-er!
251
00:11:51,701 --> 00:11:53,701
Good with his hands, is he, Sugar?
252
00:11:53,741 --> 00:11:55,781
I like a man
who's good with his hands.
253
00:11:57,861 --> 00:11:59,861
Yeah. Yeah, he is.
254
00:11:59,901 --> 00:12:03,101
You know, I'm so glad
that you've found someone, darling.
255
00:12:03,141 --> 00:12:05,141
Because she's not a classic beauty.
256
00:12:05,181 --> 00:12:07,181
Quirky, we used to call her.
257
00:12:07,221 --> 00:12:09,221
Quirky little quack quack!
258
00:12:09,261 --> 00:12:11,261
Quack quack quack!
259
00:12:11,301 --> 00:12:13,301
Quaaaack!
260
00:12:15,381 --> 00:12:18,621
Right, who wants a drink?
261
00:12:18,661 --> 00:12:20,661
Great! Quack quack!
262
00:12:22,741 --> 00:12:26,261
What the hell are you doing?
She thinks we're a couple, you know.
263
00:12:26,301 --> 00:12:28,821
I just can't stand her going on
about me being single.
264
00:12:28,861 --> 00:12:31,861
It's no difference to you. We'll be
out of here in half an hour.
265
00:12:31,901 --> 00:12:33,901
Fine.
Fine.
266
00:12:35,781 --> 00:12:39,021
I don't think you look like a duck,
by the way.
267
00:12:39,061 --> 00:12:41,061
Thanks.
Right!
268
00:12:41,101 --> 00:12:43,901
T-T-Top up!
269
00:12:45,661 --> 00:12:47,661
Oh... Pilau rice.
270
00:12:47,701 --> 00:12:49,701
Nice?
271
00:12:49,741 --> 00:12:51,741
Mm.
272
00:12:53,701 --> 00:12:58,101
Oh, it's so lovely
to see you, sweetheart.
273
00:12:58,141 --> 00:13:00,901
I'm so glad that you're so happy.
274
00:13:00,941 --> 00:13:04,141
And JJ, you seem...lovely.
275
00:13:04,181 --> 00:13:05,861
Mm. Thank you.
276
00:13:05,901 --> 00:13:08,421
He is. He adores me.
277
00:13:08,461 --> 00:13:10,461
And I adore him.
Hm!
278
00:13:10,501 --> 00:13:12,501
Oh, good. Good, good, good.
279
00:13:12,541 --> 00:13:14,341
Cos you're like me.
280
00:13:14,381 --> 00:13:16,221
I love a dark-skinned man.
281
00:13:16,261 --> 00:13:20,021
You know, Omar Sharif and...
282
00:13:20,061 --> 00:13:22,061
..Mohamadam Ali.
283
00:13:22,101 --> 00:13:24,101
Get 'em up!
284
00:13:25,301 --> 00:13:27,301
But now that you're both here,
285
00:13:27,341 --> 00:13:30,061
there is something
that I want to talk to you about.
286
00:13:30,101 --> 00:13:32,101
What is it?
287
00:13:35,381 --> 00:13:37,381
Oh, my God, are you dying?
288
00:13:37,421 --> 00:13:40,301
Is Uncle Paulie my real dad?
No!
289
00:13:40,341 --> 00:13:42,941
Well, it's unlikely.
290
00:13:42,981 --> 00:13:44,981
Then what?
291
00:13:45,021 --> 00:13:47,901
Look, me and her dad,
292
00:13:47,941 --> 00:13:51,501
we had a lot of...
..problems.
293
00:13:51,541 --> 00:13:54,541
Yeah?
And one of them was...
294
00:13:54,581 --> 00:13:56,581
..the menopause.
295
00:13:56,621 --> 00:14:00,261
What about it?
It came very early to me.
296
00:14:00,301 --> 00:14:03,901
A lot earlier
than I've ever told you about.
297
00:14:03,941 --> 00:14:05,981
How early?
I was 33.
298
00:14:07,021 --> 00:14:09,021
And your gran had it as well.
299
00:14:09,061 --> 00:14:11,061
You mean...
Yeah. So it's...
300
00:14:11,101 --> 00:14:13,101
It's... It's thingy!
301
00:14:13,141 --> 00:14:15,141
Um... Hereditary.
302
00:14:15,181 --> 00:14:17,181
That's it. Hededitry. I mean...
303
00:14:17,221 --> 00:14:19,221
I do not want to scare you,
304
00:14:19,261 --> 00:14:21,261
but you seem so much in love.
305
00:14:21,301 --> 00:14:23,901
And if you're set on having kiddies,
I would...
306
00:14:23,941 --> 00:14:25,941
I'd just get a move on.
307
00:14:29,221 --> 00:14:31,221
Ooh! That's the nan bread.
308
00:14:45,061 --> 00:14:47,061
Are you OK?
309
00:14:49,701 --> 00:14:52,701
I want to be someone's mummy.
310
00:14:52,741 --> 00:14:57,341
I want to dress her up
in dungarees and pigtails.
311
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,901
What if I've left it too late?
312
00:15:21,381 --> 00:15:23,381
Gentlemen, meet...
313
00:15:25,421 --> 00:15:27,421
..Teresa.
314
00:15:27,461 --> 00:15:29,461
Dude! Amazing, man!
315
00:15:29,501 --> 00:15:31,501
Fucking brilliant, dude.
316
00:15:31,541 --> 00:15:33,541
Why did you call her Teresa?
317
00:15:33,581 --> 00:15:35,581
Like Mother Teresa.
318
00:15:35,621 --> 00:15:38,821
I know, but she's a fucking nun
with dry ankles, isn't she?
319
00:15:38,861 --> 00:15:40,861
Can you not think
of a sexy car name?
320
00:15:40,901 --> 00:15:43,301
All right, but what is
a super sexy car name?
321
00:15:43,341 --> 00:15:44,941
Scarlett.
Nicole.
322
00:15:44,981 --> 00:15:46,981
Carol.
Ooh.
323
00:15:47,021 --> 00:15:50,621
- What?
- Doesn't look like the kind of
car that'd be in a porno, love.
324
00:16:00,621 --> 00:16:02,621
Right, follow my lead.
325
00:16:07,061 --> 00:16:09,261
You there! You there!
Young man!
326
00:16:09,301 --> 00:16:12,861
Young man! We're from out of town,
looking for a game.
327
00:16:12,901 --> 00:16:14,901
Is the owner around, by any chance?
328
00:16:14,941 --> 00:16:16,941
Mr Hardwick? He'll be in his office.
329
00:16:16,981 --> 00:16:18,981
I can radio him.
330
00:16:19,021 --> 00:16:21,821
Oh, goodness me,
that would be terrific. Nice one.
331
00:16:21,861 --> 00:16:24,781
What? What are you doing?
What is that stupid accent?
332
00:16:24,821 --> 00:16:26,821
My posh voice.
Groundsman to Mr Hardwick?
333
00:16:26,861 --> 00:16:28,861
Adds a touch of class, no?
334
00:16:28,901 --> 00:16:31,221
Just...
It doesn't match your face, so...
335
00:16:31,261 --> 00:16:33,381
What do you mean,
it doesn't match my face?
336
00:16:33,421 --> 00:16:35,541
Will you just speak normally,
please?
337
00:16:35,581 --> 00:16:37,581
I'm in character, you clown.
338
00:16:37,621 --> 00:16:40,341
This is method acting, for Rory.
My golf persona.
339
00:16:40,381 --> 00:16:42,381
Rory?
That's right.
340
00:16:42,421 --> 00:16:44,421
Worked out a whole back story
for him.
341
00:16:44,461 --> 00:16:47,901
Believe me,
he had a tough childhood.
342
00:16:47,941 --> 00:16:50,141
Oh, for fuck's sake.
In spite of that, he's prevailed.
343
00:16:50,181 --> 00:16:52,901
He's going to meet you
at the terrace. Over there.
344
00:16:52,941 --> 00:16:56,741
Oh... Ever so nice.
Nice. Thank you very much.
345
00:16:56,781 --> 00:16:59,501
Don't draw attention to yourself.
I know this...
346
00:16:59,541 --> 00:17:01,541
Are you the out of towners?
347
00:17:01,581 --> 00:17:03,901
Yes, aye. Dylan.
Dylan Golding is my name.
348
00:17:03,941 --> 00:17:05,941
And this is my associate.
349
00:17:05,981 --> 00:17:07,981
Rory Finnegan. MBE.
350
00:17:08,021 --> 00:17:10,221
Russell Hardwick, managing director.
351
00:17:10,261 --> 00:17:12,501
So, which club are you from?
Brookworth.
352
00:17:12,541 --> 00:17:14,541
Brookworth? I know it well.
353
00:17:14,581 --> 00:17:17,581
- Yeah?
- Yeah, I know the MD
down there. Michael Fincher.
354
00:17:17,621 --> 00:17:20,061
Oh, Michael. Mickey boy.
The Finchmeister.
355
00:17:20,101 --> 00:17:22,541
He's a great lad.
Yeah, he's great, isn't he?
356
00:17:22,581 --> 00:17:24,581
And such a nice guy.
357
00:17:24,621 --> 00:17:27,541
Shame though about...what happened.
358
00:17:27,581 --> 00:17:29,581
Frightful.
I know.
359
00:17:29,621 --> 00:17:32,861
- Frightful.
- You wouldn't want to be
managing with only one.
360
00:17:32,901 --> 00:17:36,461
Definitely better
with more than one. For sure.
361
00:17:36,501 --> 00:17:38,701
So you're after a game, yeah?
Cheeky 18?
362
00:17:38,741 --> 00:17:40,741
That would be great.
363
00:17:40,781 --> 00:17:44,181
We've been driving, you see.
Lots of driving, don't you know.
364
00:17:44,221 --> 00:17:48,621
And we rather thought it would be
great to stretch our legs
365
00:17:48,661 --> 00:17:52,541
and swing a few clubs around
the golf...course.
366
00:17:52,581 --> 00:17:55,581
No problem. Strictly speaking,
we're a members club.
367
00:17:55,621 --> 00:17:58,661
But I shall just give Mickey a call.
He can vouch for you.
368
00:17:58,701 --> 00:18:00,701
And away you go.
369
00:18:00,741 --> 00:18:03,061
The old cars.
I don't know about you, mate,
370
00:18:03,101 --> 00:18:05,101
I find it really stiffens me up.
371
00:18:05,141 --> 00:18:07,341
I say old, I mean classic.
Won't be a sec.
372
00:18:07,381 --> 00:18:10,021
They go like a dream,
but they're not built for comfort,
373
00:18:10,061 --> 00:18:12,061
the old classic cars!
374
00:18:12,101 --> 00:18:14,101
Michael! Russell Hardwick.
375
00:18:14,141 --> 00:18:16,141
Prepare to leg it.
376
00:18:16,181 --> 00:18:18,181
Yeah, how's life?
377
00:18:18,221 --> 00:18:21,821
Fantastic. I've got a couple of
your boys here looking for a game.
378
00:18:21,861 --> 00:18:23,461
Dylan Golding and Rory...
379
00:18:23,501 --> 00:18:25,301
Finnegan.
Finnegan.
380
00:18:25,341 --> 00:18:27,341
MBE.
381
00:18:29,461 --> 00:18:31,461
Uh-huh. OK.
382
00:18:31,501 --> 00:18:33,501
OK, catch you later.
383
00:18:37,301 --> 00:18:39,301
Course is all yours, gentlemen.
384
00:18:39,341 --> 00:18:41,341
Mickey vouched for you.
385
00:18:41,381 --> 00:18:44,021
Oh, Mickey. Good old... Michael.
386
00:18:44,061 --> 00:18:46,301
We need to get him a drink. Thanks.
Enjoy.
387
00:18:46,341 --> 00:18:49,461
We'll just fetch our clubs
from the Triumph Herald 1963.
388
00:19:04,101 --> 00:19:06,101
It's like Ford Knox, Vinnie.
389
00:19:06,141 --> 00:19:09,141
There is no way we are nicking
them cars from Hardwick.
390
00:19:09,181 --> 00:19:11,781
He keeps them in a special compound.
What kind of compound?
391
00:19:11,821 --> 00:19:13,821
Can we not break in?
392
00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:16,501
No, the whole thing is guarded.
It's patrolled.
393
00:19:16,541 --> 00:19:19,461
We asked to see them.
He got really paranoid about it.
394
00:19:19,501 --> 00:19:24,701
I keep mine under lock and key.
CCTV. Guard dogs.
395
00:19:24,741 --> 00:19:27,461
And a moat with piranha fish.
396
00:19:27,501 --> 00:19:30,021
So dressing up as Rory
was pointless.
397
00:19:33,061 --> 00:19:35,781
So what you're saying is
we're fucked, aren't we?
398
00:19:35,821 --> 00:19:37,821
Yes.
Yeah? All right, fine.
399
00:19:37,861 --> 00:19:40,061
We'll blackmail him, then.
Blackmail?
400
00:19:40,101 --> 00:19:42,221
This is Hardwick
we're talking about.
401
00:19:42,261 --> 00:19:44,261
He's an enormous cockhole.
402
00:19:44,301 --> 00:19:46,301
Remember what he did to our Cardi?
403
00:19:46,341 --> 00:19:48,661
Eh? He thinks he's better
than everybody.
404
00:19:48,701 --> 00:19:51,101
And we've got photographic evidence
of him playing away.
405
00:19:51,141 --> 00:19:53,141
Thomas, give me the phone.
406
00:19:55,221 --> 00:19:58,221
Who would over-arm it like that,
you fucking nutcase?
407
00:19:58,261 --> 00:20:01,461
Oh, dude, he's a vindictive bastard.
408
00:20:01,501 --> 00:20:03,501
He could turn nasty.
409
00:20:03,541 --> 00:20:05,861
His wife's minted.
We could name our price
410
00:20:05,901 --> 00:20:08,301
and earn more
than what Bishop's offering.
411
00:20:08,341 --> 00:20:10,341
Exactly. JJ, have a look at that.
412
00:20:12,381 --> 00:20:14,381
Still got his golfing glove on.
413
00:20:14,421 --> 00:20:17,021
Seriously, listen.
All we need to do is work out
414
00:20:17,061 --> 00:20:19,101
how to get photographs
off the phone,
415
00:20:19,141 --> 00:20:21,221
show his wife what a twat he is.
416
00:20:21,261 --> 00:20:23,261
Yeah. You need a specific cable.
417
00:20:23,301 --> 00:20:26,461
Christ!
Thwarted at the first hurdle.
418
00:20:28,541 --> 00:20:30,541
Ah.
419
00:20:30,581 --> 00:20:32,581
Here he is. Knobhead.
420
00:20:32,621 --> 00:20:37,021
Right, you. All you have to do
is show him these images...
421
00:20:37,061 --> 00:20:39,061
Jesus...
422
00:20:39,101 --> 00:20:41,261
Show him these
and ask for the money.
423
00:20:41,301 --> 00:20:43,301
I don't want to do this.
He scares me.
424
00:20:43,341 --> 00:20:46,461
You need to go and show him who he's
dealing with, privileged knobhead.
425
00:20:46,501 --> 00:20:49,141
Leave the pigeon as well.
I need him. I need the courage.
426
00:20:49,181 --> 00:20:51,701
You can't take Nigel over there.
I'm not doing it, then!
427
00:20:51,741 --> 00:20:53,941
Me and Nigel or nothing!
Stop snapping, dude!
428
00:20:53,981 --> 00:20:55,981
Knobhead!
429
00:20:56,021 --> 00:20:58,021
Cardi, tuck him in.
Yes!
430
00:20:58,061 --> 00:21:00,701
Tuck yourself in.
That doesn't even make sense.
431
00:21:00,741 --> 00:21:02,741
It's just Russell Hardwick.
432
00:21:02,781 --> 00:21:04,901
Just that knobhead Russell Hardwick.
433
00:21:04,941 --> 00:21:06,941
Russell.
You?
434
00:21:06,981 --> 00:21:08,981
The aquatic golf ball boy.
435
00:21:11,061 --> 00:21:13,061
Yeah, that's right.
436
00:21:13,101 --> 00:21:15,101
It's me. Well, it's not just me.
437
00:21:15,141 --> 00:21:17,341
There's other people
involved as well.
438
00:21:17,381 --> 00:21:19,781
They're sitting in that van.
What the fuck?
439
00:21:19,821 --> 00:21:23,021
And this is Nigel.
Brains of the operation.
440
00:21:23,061 --> 00:21:25,061
Er... Here's t'photos.
441
00:21:29,821 --> 00:21:31,981
Nice one of you, that. Good angle.
442
00:21:33,021 --> 00:21:35,021
Get in.
443
00:21:35,061 --> 00:21:37,701
Get in the car if he's asking you
to get in the car.
444
00:21:37,741 --> 00:21:39,741
Get in!
445
00:21:44,221 --> 00:21:46,621
You can keep those.
Those are copies.
446
00:21:46,661 --> 00:21:48,661
Thank you.
447
00:21:48,701 --> 00:21:50,701
So um...
448
00:21:50,741 --> 00:21:52,741
Have you got the cash?
449
00:21:59,381 --> 00:22:01,381
Shall I tell you what happened?
450
00:22:01,421 --> 00:22:03,421
Er... Yeah.
451
00:22:03,461 --> 00:22:06,541
My wife, my beautiful,
beautiful wife,
452
00:22:06,581 --> 00:22:08,581
Sophia...
453
00:22:09,821 --> 00:22:11,821
..has got an incurable illness.
454
00:22:13,541 --> 00:22:16,061
She's only 52 and she won't see 53.
455
00:22:16,101 --> 00:22:18,101
♪ The Way We Were
456
00:22:20,341 --> 00:22:22,341
I love her.
457
00:22:23,701 --> 00:22:25,701
I do. I love her with all my heart.
458
00:22:25,741 --> 00:22:30,221
But for a long time now,
because of the treatment,
459
00:22:30,261 --> 00:22:32,261
and the drugs she's been taking,
460
00:22:32,301 --> 00:22:34,301
there's been no...
461
00:22:34,341 --> 00:22:36,501
..physical side to our relationship.
462
00:22:36,541 --> 00:22:39,301
Have you any idea what that does
to a man, eh?
463
00:22:39,341 --> 00:22:41,341
Er... Yeah.
464
00:22:41,381 --> 00:22:43,901
And I know I should feel ashamed
of myself,
465
00:22:43,941 --> 00:22:46,581
but... I just need...
466
00:22:48,181 --> 00:22:50,181
..that touch,
467
00:22:50,221 --> 00:22:52,221
that...
468
00:22:52,261 --> 00:22:54,261
..feel of a woman.
469
00:22:54,301 --> 00:22:56,301
And I succumbed.
470
00:22:57,701 --> 00:23:00,741
But if you send those photos
to my Sophia...
471
00:23:00,781 --> 00:23:02,781
..it will kill her.
472
00:23:02,821 --> 00:23:04,821
It will. It will finish her off.
473
00:23:04,861 --> 00:23:08,101
Imagine if it was your loved one.
Imagine how you'd feel.
474
00:23:10,181 --> 00:23:12,181
Eh?
475
00:23:12,221 --> 00:23:14,221
Sorry. Sorry.
476
00:23:14,261 --> 00:23:16,261
No, it's...
477
00:23:17,301 --> 00:23:19,301
It's all right. We... We...
478
00:23:19,341 --> 00:23:21,861
We won't tell her.
We won't show the photos.
479
00:23:21,901 --> 00:23:23,901
Really?
Yes!
480
00:23:25,101 --> 00:23:27,101
Swear to me.
481
00:23:27,141 --> 00:23:29,141
On your pigeon's life.
482
00:23:32,941 --> 00:23:35,061
I swear on my pigeon's life,
all right?
483
00:23:35,101 --> 00:23:37,861
Thank you. You...good, good man.
484
00:23:37,901 --> 00:23:39,901
Thank you.
485
00:23:42,261 --> 00:23:46,021
♪ Like a catfish in the river,
like a flounder in the sea... ♪
486
00:23:46,061 --> 00:23:49,181
Why isn't he carrying anything?
Shouldn't he have a bag?
487
00:23:49,221 --> 00:23:51,221
Cardi... Cardi, where's the money?
488
00:23:51,261 --> 00:23:53,261
Dickhead, why is he driving off?
489
00:23:53,301 --> 00:23:55,901
I couldn't, Vin, man.
I just fucking couldn't.
490
00:23:55,941 --> 00:23:57,941
What the fuck's going on?
491
00:23:57,981 --> 00:23:59,981
I couldn't.
Couldn't what?
492
00:24:00,021 --> 00:24:02,021
What are you doing?
493
00:24:05,341 --> 00:24:07,341
He misses the touch.
494
00:24:07,381 --> 00:24:09,381
What does that even mean?
495
00:24:09,421 --> 00:24:13,501
Make some noise
for the amazing Baga Chipz!
496
00:24:15,581 --> 00:24:17,821
Who's ready for my battered sausage?
497
00:24:17,861 --> 00:24:21,061
Oh, God, look at the state of him!
498
00:24:21,101 --> 00:24:23,301
Look at his weird forehead.
Weird eyes.
499
00:24:23,341 --> 00:24:25,341
He does have weird eyes.
500
00:24:26,621 --> 00:24:28,861
Is that a couple...
Wanting a threesome?
501
00:24:28,901 --> 00:24:31,061
Oh, stop it!
Oh, my God!
502
00:24:31,101 --> 00:24:33,101
You can't rush into this, you know.
503
00:24:33,141 --> 00:24:36,181
Trust me, as someone who got
pregnant at the wrong time,
504
00:24:36,221 --> 00:24:38,541
you need to make sure
that you're certain.
505
00:24:38,581 --> 00:24:41,661
I wish I had someone
I could even consider a future with.
506
00:24:42,701 --> 00:24:44,781
Men just see me as my job.
507
00:24:44,821 --> 00:24:46,821
Er... Excuse me!
508
00:24:46,861 --> 00:24:49,701
You are beautiful, for starters.
And you're funny.
509
00:24:49,741 --> 00:24:52,941
There's someone out there that would
kill to be with a woman like you.
510
00:24:52,981 --> 00:24:54,981
Not him.
511
00:24:55,021 --> 00:24:57,061
He looks like he smells of fish.
512
00:24:58,181 --> 00:25:00,181
Mr McCann.
513
00:25:01,741 --> 00:25:03,741
We'll catch up later.
514
00:25:05,661 --> 00:25:07,901
Does she know...
about our arrangement?
515
00:25:07,941 --> 00:25:10,461
Oh, no, no. I'll tell her
you were looking for Vinnie.
516
00:25:10,501 --> 00:25:12,821
Here. Incorporate this
into the takings.
517
00:25:12,861 --> 00:25:16,221
And congratulations,
you've had a very good month.
518
00:25:16,261 --> 00:25:18,261
Thank you.
519
00:25:18,301 --> 00:25:20,301
I'll be seeing you.
520
00:25:33,381 --> 00:25:35,381
That's it. We've failed.
521
00:25:35,421 --> 00:25:38,141
We've had the opportunity
to screw him twice now,
522
00:25:38,181 --> 00:25:40,221
and we've failed.
Still, hear me out.
523
00:25:40,261 --> 00:25:42,701
We could still send the photos
to his missus.
524
00:25:42,741 --> 00:25:46,661
Unless, right, in his car,
he had this brochure for a car show.
525
00:25:46,701 --> 00:25:49,941
The Vintage North. What if
he's taking his classics to that?
526
00:25:49,981 --> 00:25:52,821
I'm googling that.
The Vintage North it was called.
527
00:25:52,861 --> 00:25:54,861
Last day for entry is today.
528
00:25:54,901 --> 00:25:57,621
So we're going to need to enter
Teresa, like, now.
529
00:25:57,661 --> 00:25:59,661
We'd better get a shift on
with that.
530
00:25:59,701 --> 00:26:02,021
I don't want to miss that,
Christ on a bike.
531
00:26:04,101 --> 00:26:06,101
Nice tats.
Sorry?
532
00:26:06,141 --> 00:26:08,141
I like these.
533
00:26:08,181 --> 00:26:10,261
You like my tattoos?
I like your t...
534
00:26:11,901 --> 00:26:14,301
I nearly said tits.
I panicked a little bit.
535
00:26:14,341 --> 00:26:16,541
What I meant...
I like your chain and...
536
00:26:16,581 --> 00:26:18,581
I'm Sugar.
I'm Vincent.
537
00:26:18,621 --> 00:26:20,621
Er... Vinnie. Vin... Vin.
538
00:26:20,661 --> 00:26:24,941
Well, good to meet you, Vin,
Vincent, Vinnie, Vin.
539
00:26:24,981 --> 00:26:26,981
Oh, shit.
540
00:26:27,021 --> 00:26:29,941
I drink coffee sometimes.
You'll find me doing it...
541
00:26:29,981 --> 00:26:31,981
Um... I do it alone most times.
542
00:26:32,021 --> 00:26:34,021
And I'm wondering...
543
00:26:34,061 --> 00:26:36,061
You... Would... Do...
544
00:26:36,101 --> 00:26:39,021
Would you like to come...with me...
545
00:26:39,061 --> 00:26:42,061
It'll just be me and you
on the day.
546
00:26:42,101 --> 00:26:44,101
Yeah, that sounds great.
547
00:26:44,141 --> 00:26:46,461
Yeah, I'd love a brew.
With you. On the day.
548
00:26:46,501 --> 00:26:48,501
Yeah?
549
00:26:48,541 --> 00:26:51,581
Oh, look at us two!
Just a couple...of coffee drinkers.
550
00:26:52,421 --> 00:26:54,021
I drink coffee!
Shit, dude.
551
00:26:54,061 --> 00:26:55,261
That went bad.
552
00:26:57,021 --> 00:26:59,021
What's his name, Harold Shipman?
553
00:26:59,061 --> 00:27:01,901
Not Harold Shipman!
554
00:27:01,941 --> 00:27:04,101
That doesn't get annoying, does it?
555
00:27:05,741 --> 00:27:08,261
Harold... Harold Pipsky?
Hello, gentlemen.
556
00:27:08,301 --> 00:27:10,701
I trust you've come
to fill in the paperwork
557
00:27:10,741 --> 00:27:12,741
to enter the competition.
Yes.
558
00:27:12,781 --> 00:27:15,301
And that's the lady, is it?
Yeah, there she is.
559
00:27:15,341 --> 00:27:17,781
Very nice indeed.
Right, I'll get the forms.
560
00:27:17,821 --> 00:27:22,261
Her indoors prefers me to keep
car matters out of the house.
561
00:27:22,301 --> 00:27:24,461
Oh!
Two ticks.
562
00:27:24,501 --> 00:27:26,501
All right.
563
00:27:26,541 --> 00:27:28,981
Looks like he needs a little rod,
doesn't he?
564
00:27:29,021 --> 00:27:31,941
A spade, and the pointy ears,
and a four-leaf clover.
565
00:27:31,981 --> 00:27:34,701
That's a bloody leprechaun.
It's the same thing.
566
00:27:34,741 --> 00:27:37,461
No, it's not.
A leprechaun is just an Irish gnome.
567
00:27:37,501 --> 00:27:39,501
He looks like a gnome.
568
00:27:41,821 --> 00:27:43,821
Are them the forms?
569
00:27:46,861 --> 00:27:48,861
Beautiful.
570
00:27:48,901 --> 00:27:50,901
Can I use your back?
571
00:27:50,941 --> 00:27:52,941
Scrumptious.
572
00:27:52,981 --> 00:27:54,981
Cardi, stay still.
573
00:27:55,021 --> 00:27:57,661
Ever wish you
could take her out for dinner?
574
00:27:59,301 --> 00:28:01,301
Wine her, dine her.
575
00:28:01,341 --> 00:28:04,661
Maybe get a little flirty
after a couple of glasses too many.
576
00:28:04,701 --> 00:28:06,941
Maybe invite her back
for a bit of coffee.
577
00:28:06,981 --> 00:28:08,981
A tender kiss
when the time is right.
578
00:28:09,021 --> 00:28:11,021
Exactly.
579
00:28:11,061 --> 00:28:13,061
Then fuck her brains out.
What?
580
00:28:13,101 --> 00:28:15,101
What? No...
581
00:28:15,141 --> 00:28:17,141
It's all right. I just got...
582
00:28:17,181 --> 00:28:19,181
..carried away with the...
583
00:28:19,221 --> 00:28:21,221
..metaphors. Is it metaphor?
584
00:28:21,261 --> 00:28:22,661
Yeah.
585
00:28:22,701 --> 00:28:25,141
And where are you going to put it
anyway? Up the exhaust -
586
00:28:25,181 --> 00:28:27,181
Hey! Shall we just leave it there?
587
00:28:27,221 --> 00:28:29,221
Absolutely.
I'm sorry to ask this,
588
00:28:29,261 --> 00:28:31,341
but I'm a bit concerned
about the old...
589
00:28:32,981 --> 00:28:35,221
..security.
We can trust everyone, can't we?
590
00:28:35,261 --> 00:28:38,301
Nothing to worry about
on that account.
591
00:28:38,341 --> 00:28:40,981
We're a community.
We all trust each other implicitly.
592
00:28:41,021 --> 00:28:43,021
Fantastic.
593
00:28:43,061 --> 00:28:46,101
Thanks ever so much.
Thank you, mate. All right.
594
00:28:46,141 --> 00:28:49,581
Dude, that is a gnome.
That is a gnome.
595
00:28:49,621 --> 00:28:52,901
Thanks for coming, Carol.
Moral support.
596
00:28:52,941 --> 00:28:54,501
Hey. Alex.
597
00:28:54,541 --> 00:28:56,541
Nick.
598
00:28:56,581 --> 00:28:58,581
I work in the travel industry.
599
00:28:58,621 --> 00:29:02,581
Wednesday, we have a black bin
for general waste.
600
00:29:02,621 --> 00:29:04,621
Green for garden clippings.
601
00:29:04,661 --> 00:29:07,301
Sellotape, to me, is like heroin.
602
00:29:07,341 --> 00:29:09,341
I love the look of it,
the smell of it.
603
00:29:09,381 --> 00:29:11,501
There's nothing you can't fix
with it.
604
00:29:11,541 --> 00:29:14,741
What about a plate? Or an arm?
605
00:29:16,821 --> 00:29:20,021
She could have a face like a eel
but if she's got the right shoes on,
606
00:29:20,061 --> 00:29:24,061
I will ride her like a bronco. Mm!
607
00:29:25,141 --> 00:29:27,141
I do like it out the back.
608
00:29:27,181 --> 00:29:30,101
Out the...
In the front, out the back.
609
00:29:31,381 --> 00:29:34,021
I'm a stripper.
Not out the back, like.
610
00:29:34,061 --> 00:29:37,781
I was a lesbos for a while
but I'm back into solids now.
611
00:29:37,821 --> 00:29:40,341
I get my kit off
and men pay me money.
612
00:29:48,181 --> 00:29:50,981
Sorry, love, that was flat.
Can I have another one?
613
00:29:51,021 --> 00:29:53,021
Whoa!
Hey, are you all right?
614
00:29:53,061 --> 00:29:54,661
JJ...
615
00:29:54,701 --> 00:29:56,701
Hang on. Got a podcast.
616
00:29:56,741 --> 00:29:59,461
What's it on?
Californian droughts of the 1930s.
617
00:29:59,501 --> 00:30:02,901
It is a madness. Back then, yeah,
the wind used to be so strong,
618
00:30:02,901 --> 00:30:05,381
it would blow the dry soil
right up into the sky
619
00:30:05,421 --> 00:30:07,421
and blacken it.
620
00:30:07,461 --> 00:30:09,461
Yeah.
Oh, really?
621
00:30:09,501 --> 00:30:11,501
Mm. Fascinating.
622
00:30:11,541 --> 00:30:14,661
And this is before all the bloody
global warming as well.
623
00:30:14,701 --> 00:30:17,421
Where are you going?
Going home. You?
624
00:30:17,461 --> 00:30:19,461
Yeah, same. I've...
625
00:30:19,501 --> 00:30:21,501
I've had a bit of a bad day.
626
00:30:21,541 --> 00:30:24,381
Do you fancy coming and helping me
drown my sorrows?
627
00:30:24,421 --> 00:30:26,421
Oh, I'm just going to...
628
00:30:28,101 --> 00:30:30,101
Yeah?
629
00:30:31,341 --> 00:30:34,541
There's something I want you to see
from last year's show.
630
00:30:34,581 --> 00:30:36,341
Before the judging takes place,
631
00:30:36,381 --> 00:30:38,381
everybody gathers
for a group photograph.
632
00:30:38,421 --> 00:30:39,821
Check out the background.
633
00:30:39,861 --> 00:30:41,861
They've left their cars.
Exactly.
634
00:30:41,901 --> 00:30:44,821
And you wouldn't believe how long
it takes to get that photo sorted.
635
00:30:44,861 --> 00:30:46,861
They'll have their keys with them
though.
636
00:30:46,901 --> 00:30:49,541
Some do, some don't.
It won't make a difference.
637
00:30:49,581 --> 00:30:51,981
Them old cars,
no deadlocks, no immobilisers.
638
00:30:52,021 --> 00:30:54,021
Do you not know this man, Hardwick?
639
00:30:54,061 --> 00:30:55,661
No, never met the man.
640
00:30:55,701 --> 00:30:58,421
I don't even know how she met him.
Through the golf probably.
641
00:30:58,461 --> 00:31:00,461
Or dogging.
Is this ornamental?
642
00:31:00,501 --> 00:31:02,501
No, no, I have got ornamental ones.
643
00:31:02,541 --> 00:31:05,741
But that will take your head
- clean off.
- Looks ornamental.
644
00:31:05,781 --> 00:31:08,421
- It isn't.
- What's all this oriental
stuff about?
645
00:31:08,461 --> 00:31:10,981
Why are you so into it?
I'm a quarter Japanese.
646
00:31:11,021 --> 00:31:13,021
I find that very hard to believe.
647
00:31:13,061 --> 00:31:15,061
When I was married,
my wife hated it.
648
00:31:15,101 --> 00:31:18,741
But now I am free to embrace
my cultural identities.
649
00:31:18,781 --> 00:31:20,981
Sorry, where might one find
a washroom?
650
00:31:21,021 --> 00:31:22,821
He wants a piss.
651
00:31:22,861 --> 00:31:24,861
Oh, er...
Outside, first on the right.
652
00:31:24,901 --> 00:31:28,221
Much obliged, Lord Bishop.
Stop doing Downton Abbey, love!
653
00:31:28,261 --> 00:31:31,581
You're doing my head in.
He loves a period drama.
654
00:31:32,821 --> 00:31:34,821
Ooh!
Sorry.
655
00:31:46,781 --> 00:31:48,781
Never met him, is it?
656
00:31:51,101 --> 00:31:54,021
Vin, Bishop's won competitions
all over with his cars,
657
00:31:54,061 --> 00:31:56,061
but not in the last three years.
658
00:31:56,101 --> 00:31:59,621
He's also pictured with Hardwick
and other lads, smiling away.
659
00:31:59,661 --> 00:32:01,661
Look at this.
660
00:32:01,701 --> 00:32:04,221
What the fuck?
What do you reckon, bit of beef?
661
00:32:04,261 --> 00:32:06,261
Looks that way, yeah.
662
00:32:06,301 --> 00:32:08,301
Oi!
Good luck!
663
00:32:08,341 --> 00:32:10,341
Nice one, fella.
664
00:32:10,381 --> 00:32:13,421
Slippery bastard.
What are you up to?
665
00:32:15,021 --> 00:32:17,021
Oh, you've got Rod Stewart on here!
666
00:32:17,061 --> 00:32:19,781
That is awful.
You should be ashamed of yourself.
667
00:32:19,821 --> 00:32:21,821
That was for a party, to be fair.
668
00:32:21,861 --> 00:32:25,181
What about The Beautiful South,
was that for a party as well?
669
00:32:25,221 --> 00:32:27,221
What the fuck is Bro-se?
670
00:32:27,261 --> 00:32:28,341
Bros!
671
00:32:28,381 --> 00:32:29,861
Bros?
672
00:32:29,901 --> 00:32:31,701
No, Bros.
Bros?
673
00:32:31,741 --> 00:32:34,581
Put Bros on, they are my fave.
I promise you're going to love it.
674
00:32:34,621 --> 00:32:35,821
Oh, God.
675
00:32:35,861 --> 00:32:37,861
♪ When will I, will I be famous?
676
00:32:37,901 --> 00:32:39,621
As bad as I thought.
677
00:32:39,661 --> 00:32:42,781
Oh, my God, come on! Let the music
run through your veins.
678
00:32:42,821 --> 00:32:44,821
No way are you getting me dancing.
679
00:32:44,861 --> 00:32:47,461
Let the brothers Bros enter you.
No, thank you.
680
00:32:47,501 --> 00:32:50,541
Come on! Just don't worry about
what anyone thinks.
681
00:32:50,581 --> 00:32:52,581
Come on!
682
00:32:52,621 --> 00:32:54,621
OK!
Come on!
683
00:32:54,661 --> 00:32:57,661
Shake your ass.
Pretend nobody's watching.
684
00:32:57,701 --> 00:33:01,501
What would Bros have done if they
worried about what people thought?
685
00:33:01,541 --> 00:33:03,541
This song wouldn't exist.
686
00:33:03,581 --> 00:33:05,581
♪ I can't answer that! ♪
687
00:33:05,621 --> 00:33:07,621
You're mad.
688
00:33:08,621 --> 00:33:12,821
♪ When will I, will I be famous?
689
00:33:12,861 --> 00:33:15,901
♪ I can't answer,
I can't answer that ♪
690
00:33:35,941 --> 00:33:38,501
That X there, that's where
we are now. All right?
691
00:33:38,541 --> 00:33:43,461
The in-competition cars,
they're going to be...
692
00:33:43,501 --> 00:33:45,501
..there.
Why?
693
00:33:45,541 --> 00:33:47,821
Why? They're going to line up
alphabetically.
694
00:33:47,861 --> 00:33:49,861
Alphabetical to what though?
695
00:33:49,901 --> 00:33:52,021
The name of the owner
or the make of car?
696
00:33:52,061 --> 00:33:55,061
It's the name of the owner.
Hardwick's a piece of piss cos...
697
00:33:55,101 --> 00:33:58,421
It's halfway, in't it? You're not
good with letters, buddy.
698
00:33:58,461 --> 00:34:00,261
I'm not good with letters.
699
00:34:00,301 --> 00:34:02,101
Zuh...
Zed.
700
00:34:02,141 --> 00:34:06,061
Zed... That's our getaway. Through
the gate, gravel path, we're gone.
701
00:34:06,101 --> 00:34:08,101
What's that Q?
That Q...
702
00:34:08,141 --> 00:34:10,381
..is the cake
stall in case we get hungry.
703
00:34:10,421 --> 00:34:14,021
We're not going for cakes! We're
robbing classic cars, bell end.
704
00:34:14,061 --> 00:34:16,061
We are trying to be a cool criminal.
705
00:34:16,101 --> 00:34:20,221
Check your walkie-talkies.
Let's have a go on them.
706
00:34:20,261 --> 00:34:22,261
Testing, testing.
707
00:34:22,301 --> 00:34:24,621
Mine's not working.
Have you turned it on?
708
00:34:24,661 --> 00:34:27,061
No, where's on?
Big fucking orange button.
709
00:34:27,101 --> 00:34:29,101
Do we know what were doing?
Yeah.
710
00:34:29,141 --> 00:34:31,501
All right, sound enough.
Positions, then.
711
00:34:33,661 --> 00:34:36,301
Give it here. Do you know
what you're doing, you?
712
00:34:36,341 --> 00:34:38,341
No.
No.
713
00:34:38,381 --> 00:34:41,221
Get up there, you. Get up there
and behave yourself.
714
00:34:41,261 --> 00:34:43,261
Cardi, nice one. Behave yourself.
715
00:34:43,301 --> 00:34:45,301
Will do.
716
00:34:45,341 --> 00:34:47,981
No cakes, dude, I'm serious.
OK, OK.
717
00:34:49,221 --> 00:34:50,781
Hiya.
718
00:34:50,821 --> 00:34:52,821
Oh, hi.
719
00:34:52,861 --> 00:34:54,861
I've brought you a...
720
00:34:54,901 --> 00:34:56,901
Yeah, thanks.
721
00:34:56,941 --> 00:34:59,181
It's a latte. If that's OK.
722
00:34:59,221 --> 00:35:02,141
Didn't put sugar in.
No, that's fine, thanks.
723
00:35:06,981 --> 00:35:09,661
So I... I've called you
a couple of times and...
724
00:35:09,701 --> 00:35:11,701
..Whatsapped.
Yeah, I know.
725
00:35:11,741 --> 00:35:13,741
I know you have actually. And...
726
00:35:13,781 --> 00:35:15,781
I've been meaning to ring you.
727
00:35:15,821 --> 00:35:17,821
But...the thing is...
728
00:35:17,861 --> 00:35:19,861
..my mum is ill.
729
00:35:19,901 --> 00:35:21,901
Yeah.
730
00:35:21,941 --> 00:35:25,181
And um... It's in her...pancreas.
731
00:35:25,221 --> 00:35:27,221
So I had to go and visit her.
732
00:35:27,261 --> 00:35:29,261
Right.
733
00:35:29,301 --> 00:35:31,541
Pancreas?
Yeah, yeah.
734
00:35:31,581 --> 00:35:35,021
Interestingly, the man who
discovered the pancreatic duct,
735
00:35:35,061 --> 00:35:37,861
he got murdered
in a disagreement with another man
736
00:35:37,861 --> 00:35:39,821
who claimed he discovered it first.
737
00:35:39,901 --> 00:35:42,141
Is it because
you think I just want a baby?
738
00:35:45,941 --> 00:35:47,941
No.
739
00:35:50,301 --> 00:35:52,301
Your mum's not sick, is she?
740
00:35:52,341 --> 00:35:53,941
You just haven't called
741
00:35:53,981 --> 00:35:56,381
because you want to pretend
that it didn't happen.
742
00:35:56,421 --> 00:35:58,221
I'm sorry.
Is it because of my job?
743
00:35:58,261 --> 00:36:00,261
No.
Then what?
744
00:36:03,621 --> 00:36:05,621
You know what? Just fuck off, JJ.
745
00:36:05,661 --> 00:36:07,661
I thought you were different.
746
00:36:07,701 --> 00:36:09,701
You're just like all the rest.
747
00:36:16,421 --> 00:36:18,421
What is wrong with me?
748
00:36:20,701 --> 00:36:24,181
Positioning Teresa
in the main viewing arena. Over.
749
00:36:26,541 --> 00:36:28,541
Are you at that fucking gate, you?
750
00:36:28,581 --> 00:36:31,381
I swear, if you are eating
confectionery, dude...
751
00:36:38,181 --> 00:36:44,621
All competitors, please gather
for the annual group photograph!
752
00:36:47,341 --> 00:36:49,741
Has anyone got eyes on Hardwick?
Negative.
753
00:36:49,781 --> 00:36:52,181
His cars are here but
there's no sign of him. Over.
754
00:36:52,221 --> 00:36:55,221
Ashley, get yourself to where
that photo's happening
755
00:36:55,261 --> 00:36:57,261
and get eyes on Hardwick.
756
00:36:57,301 --> 00:36:59,741
Me and Tommo are going to head
round the back.
757
00:36:59,781 --> 00:37:02,621
Wait for the signal.
I can't see him anywhere, lads.
758
00:37:02,661 --> 00:37:04,661
Me neither. Over.
759
00:37:04,701 --> 00:37:06,701
He's not here.
760
00:37:06,741 --> 00:37:10,061
Let's hope John's taken
the lens cap off!
761
00:37:10,101 --> 00:37:12,101
Oh! Oh, shit.
762
00:37:12,141 --> 00:37:14,141
Where is he?
He's right behind you.
763
00:37:14,181 --> 00:37:16,181
Oh, shit.
764
00:37:16,221 --> 00:37:18,221
Mm. Mm.
765
00:37:18,261 --> 00:37:20,261
Original.
766
00:37:20,301 --> 00:37:22,621
Er... What the fuck
are you two doing here?
767
00:37:25,941 --> 00:37:28,341
Daphne.
Don't Daphne me.
768
00:37:28,381 --> 00:37:31,901
First you're at my door and now
you turn up here. What's going on?
769
00:37:31,941 --> 00:37:34,661
Into cars. Sun's out.
You're after his cars, aren't you?
770
00:37:34,701 --> 00:37:36,701
No.
No, that's too much.
771
00:37:36,741 --> 00:37:38,741
Heeellp!
772
00:37:41,181 --> 00:37:43,981
Oh, fuck, dude!
You're biting my fucking hand off!
773
00:37:44,021 --> 00:37:46,021
Stop! Fucking hell!
774
00:37:48,101 --> 00:37:50,101
Ow!
775
00:37:50,141 --> 00:37:52,581
You've been taking pictures of me,
you perv!
776
00:37:52,621 --> 00:37:54,621
Don't go in there, love.
777
00:37:56,701 --> 00:38:00,021
Fuck! She got my dick!
778
00:38:00,061 --> 00:38:02,061
Stop pissing around, dickhead!
779
00:38:02,101 --> 00:38:04,101
Daphne!
780
00:38:05,141 --> 00:38:07,141
I see him there now.
781
00:38:07,181 --> 00:38:09,181
He's with the wife.
782
00:38:09,221 --> 00:38:12,821
She's looking fierce healthy
for a dying woman. On the cocktails.
783
00:38:12,861 --> 00:38:14,861
How are you, man?
784
00:38:14,901 --> 00:38:18,101
The gentleman down there,
if he could move in a little bit.
785
00:38:18,141 --> 00:38:20,781
The man in the purple shirt,
move in a little bit.
786
00:38:22,861 --> 00:38:24,861
Don't be a dick. Come on.
787
00:38:29,821 --> 00:38:31,821
What are you going to do now?
788
00:38:31,861 --> 00:38:33,981
Hit a woman?
That your style now, is it?
789
00:38:34,021 --> 00:38:36,021
You useless fucking fish killers.
790
00:38:36,061 --> 00:38:39,661
Look, Bishop just wants
his cars back.
791
00:38:39,701 --> 00:38:42,621
I know you're going through
a really shitty divorce.
792
00:38:42,661 --> 00:38:45,461
But them cars out there,
they're his pride and joy.
793
00:38:45,501 --> 00:38:47,501
What the fuck are you talking about?
794
00:38:47,541 --> 00:38:51,901
The cars you've given away,
he wants them back.
795
00:38:51,941 --> 00:38:53,941
He's paying us to do it.
796
00:38:53,981 --> 00:38:55,981
Those aren't his cars.
797
00:38:56,021 --> 00:38:58,941
They're Russell's.
You what?
798
00:38:58,981 --> 00:39:02,901
Fucker! He's using us, dude!
799
00:39:02,941 --> 00:39:05,981
He's fucking using us to steal
Hardwick's cars for him!
800
00:39:06,021 --> 00:39:08,021
Fuck!
801
00:39:08,061 --> 00:39:11,901
Because he's jealous of him winning
and he can't win shit!
802
00:39:11,941 --> 00:39:13,941
Useless little dick twat.
803
00:39:13,981 --> 00:39:16,101
Fuck's sake.
How much is he paying you?
804
00:39:16,141 --> 00:39:18,141
Five grand.
Hm!
805
00:39:18,181 --> 00:39:20,181
Five grand.
806
00:39:20,221 --> 00:39:22,221
I'll pay you six not to.
807
00:39:24,301 --> 00:39:25,261
Ten.
808
00:39:25,301 --> 00:39:26,301
Seven.
809
00:39:26,341 --> 00:39:28,341
Nine.
Seven.
810
00:39:29,381 --> 00:39:31,901
Eight and a half.
Take the seven, god's sakes.
811
00:39:31,941 --> 00:39:33,941
I'll take it.
812
00:39:33,981 --> 00:39:35,981
Knob.
813
00:39:37,021 --> 00:39:39,861
Why are you here anyway?
His wife's round t'corner.
814
00:39:39,901 --> 00:39:42,101
Because we like
dangerous lovemaking.
815
00:39:42,141 --> 00:39:44,141
Adds a little extra spice.
816
00:39:44,181 --> 00:39:46,181
Course you do.
Oh...
817
00:39:46,221 --> 00:39:49,341
It's called living, Vinnie.
You want to try it some time.
818
00:39:49,381 --> 00:39:51,381
Right, well, bye-bye, boys.
819
00:39:51,421 --> 00:39:53,421
See you, love.
Daphne.
820
00:39:54,621 --> 00:39:56,621
No.
821
00:39:56,661 --> 00:39:58,661
Nice dealing with you boys.
822
00:40:03,021 --> 00:40:05,061
You trust her to pay you?
I don't know.
823
00:40:05,101 --> 00:40:06,901
I tell you one thing though,
824
00:40:06,941 --> 00:40:09,381
she might get a kick shagging
other people's husbands.
825
00:40:09,421 --> 00:40:11,581
I get mine stealing cars,
smoking weed,
826
00:40:11,621 --> 00:40:14,621
and hanging out with knobheads.
Change of plan!
827
00:40:14,661 --> 00:40:16,661
Shit!
We're on!
828
00:40:24,261 --> 00:40:26,261
Vintage cars!
829
00:40:31,181 --> 00:40:33,181
Oi!
830
00:40:33,221 --> 00:40:36,141
How do you like them apples,
Hardwick, you posh twat!
831
00:40:36,181 --> 00:40:38,181
Come... Oh, no!
832
00:40:40,221 --> 00:40:42,221
Bastards!
833
00:40:42,261 --> 00:40:45,901
Get in the car!
We've got to stop them!
834
00:40:45,941 --> 00:40:47,821
Cardi, put down
whatever you're scoffing!
835
00:40:47,861 --> 00:40:49,861
We're on our way, lad!
Standing by.
836
00:40:49,901 --> 00:40:51,901
Come on! Faster!
837
00:40:51,941 --> 00:40:53,941
Cardi, get a bloody wriggle on!
838
00:41:00,101 --> 00:41:02,101
Close the gate, Cardi! Stall them!
839
00:41:02,141 --> 00:41:04,141
Get in the fucking car!
840
00:41:04,181 --> 00:41:06,181
All right, I'm going
as fast as I can!
841
00:41:06,221 --> 00:41:08,221
Go for it!
842
00:41:11,861 --> 00:41:14,261
Get after them, boys!
Go on, get after them!
843
00:41:20,301 --> 00:41:22,301
Take that, Hardwick. Fuck it.
844
00:41:31,261 --> 00:41:34,101
Ash, Cardi, you take
the side road after the bridge!
845
00:41:34,141 --> 00:41:36,461
Hold on, Cardi.
Make your way back to JJ's.
846
00:41:36,501 --> 00:41:38,501
Me and Dylan will take it from here.
847
00:41:38,541 --> 00:41:41,141
Once they get onto the main road,
don't lose sight of them!
848
00:41:41,181 --> 00:41:43,421
I know somewhere
I can lose them here.
849
00:41:43,461 --> 00:41:45,461
Fuck me!
850
00:42:04,221 --> 00:42:06,221
Yeah! We lost them, boys!
Whoo-hoo!
851
00:42:23,341 --> 00:42:25,461
We did it!
We've fucking done it, boys!
852
00:42:38,861 --> 00:42:40,861
Hello?
Hi.
853
00:42:40,901 --> 00:42:42,901
How's things?
854
00:42:42,941 --> 00:42:45,501
Yeah, fine. What do you want?
855
00:42:45,541 --> 00:42:47,541
Yeah, look, I've just been...
856
00:42:48,941 --> 00:42:51,341
..thinking about a few things.
And er...
857
00:42:51,381 --> 00:42:54,901
I realise that I've just been
a total idiot.
858
00:42:54,941 --> 00:42:56,941
I could have told you that.
859
00:42:59,501 --> 00:43:03,301
I haven't been with anyone
in a really long time.
860
00:43:04,381 --> 00:43:06,381
I understand.
861
00:43:06,421 --> 00:43:08,821
But that doesn't mean
that I don't like you.
862
00:43:08,861 --> 00:43:12,461
And it definitely doesn't mean
that I don't want to see you again.
863
00:43:12,501 --> 00:43:15,341
I just...
I need to take things slow.
864
00:43:15,381 --> 00:43:17,381
All right.
865
00:43:19,141 --> 00:43:22,061
So, well, if that works for you,
866
00:43:22,101 --> 00:43:24,061
and you're still interested...
867
00:43:25,301 --> 00:43:27,861
Well, I'd love to take you
on a date, you know.
868
00:43:28,941 --> 00:43:31,141
Yeah. Yeah, maybe.
869
00:43:31,181 --> 00:43:33,181
I'll have to check my diary.
870
00:43:33,221 --> 00:43:35,221
When are you thinking?
Um...
871
00:43:37,141 --> 00:43:39,861
How about right now?
What?
872
00:43:39,901 --> 00:43:41,901
Look out your front window.
873
00:43:46,621 --> 00:43:49,741
Your carriage awaits.
OK, but you'll have to wait for me.
874
00:43:49,781 --> 00:43:51,981
I can't go for a date
with these armpits.
875
00:43:52,021 --> 00:43:54,021
Give me 15 minutes.
876
00:43:54,061 --> 00:43:56,061
Maybe 20.
877
00:43:56,101 --> 00:43:57,701
Yeah, yeah, that's fine.
878
00:43:57,741 --> 00:44:00,661
I've got my podcast anyway.
The history of the pancreas.
879
00:44:00,701 --> 00:44:02,701
OK, OK. OK.
880
00:44:24,661 --> 00:44:25,661
Yaah!
881
00:44:25,701 --> 00:44:28,021
Mammy was adamant.
We all had the same dad.
882
00:44:28,061 --> 00:44:30,061
I just want to find out.
883
00:44:31,541 --> 00:44:34,341
If them two aren't fucking,
I am Uncle Tom Cobbler.
884
00:44:34,381 --> 00:44:35,861
He's definitely mixed race, dude.
885
00:44:35,901 --> 00:44:38,061
Are you saying my mother
cheated on her loving husband
886
00:44:38,101 --> 00:44:40,101
with a black man? How dare you?!
887
00:44:40,141 --> 00:44:42,141
What the fuck are you doing?
888
00:44:42,181 --> 00:44:44,421
You know Mammy well.
You know she as no saint.
889
00:44:44,461 --> 00:44:46,061
Ah, she liked the dick.
890
00:44:46,101 --> 00:44:48,181
There is something in them
he doesn't want us to see.
891
00:44:48,221 --> 00:44:50,821
Don't move or we'll take
your fucking heads!
892
00:44:54,101 --> 00:44:56,421
AccessibleCustomerService@sky.co.uk
65991
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof