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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,491 --> 00:00:09,111 This coffee is so good. 2 00:00:09,311 --> 00:00:10,841 It's got a nice body, 3 00:00:11,041 --> 00:00:12,951 a lot of light, biscuity 4 00:00:13,151 --> 00:00:14,111 but it fades to reveal 5 00:00:14,311 --> 00:00:15,611 an earthy yet creamy finish. 6 00:00:15,811 --> 00:00:17,901 Is it a shade-grown 7 00:00:19,031 --> 00:00:21,501 It's Folgers, Dave. 8 00:00:23,071 --> 00:00:24,571 That was my next guess. 9 00:00:26,011 --> 00:00:28,061 Hey-hey. 10 00:00:28,261 --> 00:00:30,301 We got a package at 11 00:00:30,501 --> 00:00:31,631 Well, all right. 12 00:00:31,831 --> 00:00:33,501 And with a few days to spare, 13 00:00:33,701 --> 00:00:36,571 I finally got the perfect 14 00:00:36,771 --> 00:00:38,771 Got to do it big 15 00:00:38,971 --> 00:00:41,961 Yeah, and Dad has a bad history 16 00:00:42,961 --> 00:00:45,041 Yep, he is 0 17 00:00:45,241 --> 00:00:47,551 Remember when he got her 18 00:00:47,751 --> 00:00:49,421 Oh, she was so upset. 19 00:00:49,621 --> 00:00:53,501 She vacuumed through 20 00:00:54,641 --> 00:00:56,661 Well, don't forget her 40th. 21 00:00:56,861 --> 00:00:57,721 The cake. 22 00:00:57,921 --> 00:00:58,861 Mm. 23 00:00:59,061 --> 00:01:00,091 Was it a carrot cake? 24 00:01:00,291 --> 00:01:01,991 You know, vegetables 25 00:01:02,201 --> 00:01:03,381 Full stop. 26 00:01:04,311 --> 00:01:05,501 I like zucchini bread. 27 00:01:05,701 --> 00:01:06,681 No! 28 00:01:08,381 --> 00:01:10,301 It turns out 29 00:01:10,501 --> 00:01:12,371 Her face swelled up 30 00:01:12,571 --> 00:01:14,441 That's why the next year, 31 00:01:14,641 --> 00:01:17,061 And ran over her 32 00:01:18,431 --> 00:01:20,881 Well, I couldn't see 33 00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:23,071 But this year 34 00:01:23,971 --> 00:01:26,491 I got her the most 35 00:01:26,691 --> 00:01:28,951 A genuine Chanel jacket 36 00:01:29,151 --> 00:01:31,671 straight off 37 00:01:32,681 --> 00:01:36,151 Look like it came straight 38 00:01:37,151 --> 00:01:38,131 (chuckles) 39 00:01:38,331 --> 00:01:39,901 She's gonna love it, baby... 40 00:01:40,101 --> 00:01:41,031 DAVE: 41 00:01:41,231 --> 00:01:43,791 Ah, yes. Oh, no. 42 00:01:45,721 --> 00:01:48,041 Hey, man, that's too small. 43 00:01:48,241 --> 00:01:49,641 I can see that, Dave. 44 00:01:49,841 --> 00:01:54,011 Yeah, so I don't have to point 45 00:01:54,211 --> 00:01:55,451 Uh, no. 46 00:01:55,651 --> 00:01:57,751 Well, looks like 47 00:01:57,951 --> 00:01:59,101 (laughs) 48 00:02:02,441 --> 00:02:03,361 Hey. 49 00:02:03,561 --> 00:02:04,861 Now, what are you boys up to? 50 00:02:05,061 --> 00:02:06,591 Nothing. 51 00:02:06,791 --> 00:02:08,361 Well, I hope you're 52 00:02:08,561 --> 00:02:10,431 anything extravagant 53 00:02:10,631 --> 00:02:13,531 I don't need anything. 54 00:02:13,731 --> 00:02:15,231 Well, you know you got that. 55 00:02:15,431 --> 00:02:17,041 You know? But I got to do 56 00:02:17,241 --> 00:02:18,701 a little something 57 00:02:18,901 --> 00:02:21,071 Okay, I'm just saying, 58 00:02:21,271 --> 00:02:23,841 at my age, you can't ask 59 00:02:24,041 --> 00:02:25,341 You know what I mean? 60 00:02:25,541 --> 00:02:27,351 You know what I mean? 61 00:02:27,551 --> 00:02:29,421 You do it, Mama. Okay. 62 00:02:29,621 --> 00:02:30,981 (Malcolm chuckles) 63 00:02:31,181 --> 00:02:34,101 Oh, man, she is definitely 64 00:02:35,671 --> 00:02:38,291 Luckily, we found 65 00:02:38,491 --> 00:02:39,831 Oh, yes, we did. 66 00:02:40,031 --> 00:02:41,561 The latest 67 00:02:41,761 --> 00:02:43,601 because she's always complaining 68 00:02:43,801 --> 00:02:45,781 Well, they did get run over. 69 00:02:47,621 --> 00:02:49,001 Okay, how much do 70 00:02:49,201 --> 00:02:51,501 (chuckles) 71 00:02:51,701 --> 00:02:52,811 Come on, guys. 72 00:02:53,011 --> 00:02:55,211 Look, I'll give 73 00:02:55,411 --> 00:02:57,541 (laughs) 74 00:02:57,741 --> 00:02:58,881 You have got to get your own. 75 00:02:59,081 --> 00:02:59,911 (laughter) 76 00:03:00,111 --> 00:03:01,251 Watch out. 77 00:03:01,451 --> 00:03:03,281 Move out the way. 78 00:03:03,481 --> 00:03:05,231 mm-hmm. 79 00:03:06,271 --> 00:03:08,221 * Welcome to the block, 80 00:03:08,421 --> 00:03:09,841 * Welcome to the hood. * 81 00:03:15,141 --> 00:03:16,981 Oh, hey, babe. 82 00:03:18,981 --> 00:03:20,331 What's going on? 83 00:03:20,531 --> 00:03:22,971 Our online fundraising 84 00:03:23,171 --> 00:03:24,601 and our donations suck. 85 00:03:24,801 --> 00:03:27,691 What are you talking about? 86 00:03:29,631 --> 00:03:30,781 Yeah. 87 00:03:30,981 --> 00:03:33,851 Anyway, I'm waiting 88 00:03:34,051 --> 00:03:35,251 to walk by to pick up his kids. 89 00:03:35,451 --> 00:03:37,151 I'm going to "accidentally" 90 00:03:37,351 --> 00:03:39,291 and get him to donate 91 00:03:39,491 --> 00:03:42,051 Oh, finally, the day I get 92 00:03:42,251 --> 00:03:43,491 Ooh, there he is. 93 00:03:43,691 --> 00:03:44,561 He's mine. Jerry. 94 00:03:44,761 --> 00:03:46,461 Jerry! Ooh! 95 00:03:46,661 --> 00:03:47,961 Oh... 96 00:03:48,161 --> 00:03:50,861 Fire! Uh, false alarm. 97 00:03:51,061 --> 00:03:52,001 Hey. 98 00:03:52,201 --> 00:03:54,071 You okay? 99 00:03:54,271 --> 00:03:55,831 Hey, can I ask you 100 00:03:56,031 --> 00:03:57,701 No, I don't know 101 00:03:57,901 --> 00:03:59,421 Rebecca Romijn 102 00:04:00,821 --> 00:04:02,511 (strained laughter) 103 00:04:02,711 --> 00:04:05,311 That's funny. 104 00:04:05,511 --> 00:04:08,061 I don't know how I got 105 00:04:09,261 --> 00:04:11,981 So, anyway, our big 106 00:04:12,181 --> 00:04:13,551 is coming up, 107 00:04:13,751 --> 00:04:15,821 if you might be able to donate 108 00:04:16,021 --> 00:04:17,291 Of course. I'm pretty sure 109 00:04:17,491 --> 00:04:20,061 I have a Kindle 110 00:04:20,261 --> 00:04:21,061 Brand-new. 111 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:24,401 Oh, uh, yeah, thanks. 112 00:04:24,601 --> 00:04:27,401 I'm kidding. How many VIP 113 00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:30,801 Oh, four. Yes. 114 00:04:31,001 --> 00:04:32,591 Hooah. 115 00:04:33,861 --> 00:04:34,711 I'm sorry? 116 00:04:34,911 --> 00:04:35,871 No, I'm-- I just-- 117 00:04:36,071 --> 00:04:37,081 I-I don't... 118 00:04:37,281 --> 00:04:38,911 I don't mean to embarrass you, 119 00:04:39,111 --> 00:04:43,351 but, uh, I just-- Scent of 120 00:04:43,551 --> 00:04:46,021 Me, too. But that 121 00:04:46,221 --> 00:04:47,771 I'm Jerry O'Connell. 122 00:04:53,841 --> 00:04:57,411 * * 123 00:04:58,981 --> 00:05:00,671 I'll take any idea you got. 124 00:05:00,871 --> 00:05:03,341 I am desperate to find 125 00:05:03,541 --> 00:05:05,271 Well, I got her 126 00:05:05,471 --> 00:05:07,341 I found on Oprah's 127 00:05:07,541 --> 00:05:10,341 It's designed by her 128 00:05:10,541 --> 00:05:14,551 Perfect. I'll give you $300 cash 129 00:05:14,751 --> 00:05:18,221 Calvin. Come on, 130 00:05:18,421 --> 00:05:19,691 You've got to dig deeper. 131 00:05:19,891 --> 00:05:21,691 All right, $350. 132 00:05:21,891 --> 00:05:23,091 Calvin! 133 00:05:23,291 --> 00:05:25,991 Just, whenever I ask 134 00:05:26,191 --> 00:05:28,191 she says, "All I need is you." 135 00:05:28,391 --> 00:05:29,291 Well, yeah, 136 00:05:29,501 --> 00:05:32,101 but we actually want the gift. 137 00:05:32,301 --> 00:05:33,331 Well, 138 00:05:33,531 --> 00:05:34,771 you know, 139 00:05:34,971 --> 00:05:37,871 I'm going to play her 140 00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:39,301 I've been practicing for weeks. 141 00:05:39,511 --> 00:05:42,911 Grover, that's really sweet 142 00:05:43,111 --> 00:05:44,041 Look, say it's from me, 143 00:05:44,241 --> 00:05:45,611 I'll give you $300 cash. 144 00:05:45,811 --> 00:05:48,351 Mixed bills, tens and 20s. 145 00:05:48,551 --> 00:05:50,521 No, no, no, no. 146 00:05:50,721 --> 00:05:53,191 Come on, Calvin, 147 00:05:53,391 --> 00:05:55,251 Why not support a good cause 148 00:05:55,451 --> 00:05:57,121 from the school auction site? 149 00:05:57,321 --> 00:06:00,091 All right, 150 00:06:00,291 --> 00:06:01,561 (groans) 151 00:06:01,761 --> 00:06:04,901 Lunch with 152 00:06:05,101 --> 00:06:06,231 Yeah. 153 00:06:06,431 --> 00:06:08,101 Juggling lessons. 154 00:06:08,301 --> 00:06:09,771 (scoffs) 155 00:06:09,971 --> 00:06:11,741 A 60-pound weighted blanket? 156 00:06:11,941 --> 00:06:13,211 How do you get out of bed? 157 00:06:13,411 --> 00:06:16,211 It's been a rough 158 00:06:16,411 --> 00:06:17,441 Ooh, ooh, ooh. 159 00:06:17,641 --> 00:06:20,351 VIP tickets to The Talk. 160 00:06:20,551 --> 00:06:21,481 Tina loves The Talk. 161 00:06:21,681 --> 00:06:23,221 Sheryl Underwood is her girl. 162 00:06:23,421 --> 00:06:24,981 All right, you know what? 163 00:06:25,181 --> 00:06:26,841 Great. 164 00:06:27,701 --> 00:06:31,591 Okay, well, how about 165 00:06:31,791 --> 00:06:35,411 right now and we cut out 166 00:06:36,551 --> 00:06:39,501 The middleman is 167 00:06:39,701 --> 00:06:41,131 for underprivileged kids. 168 00:06:41,331 --> 00:06:43,571 Okay, all right. $375. 169 00:06:43,771 --> 00:06:46,071 $400 and I take Grover 170 00:06:46,271 --> 00:06:48,711 We all know he can be a handful. 171 00:06:48,911 --> 00:06:50,461 I'm right here. 172 00:06:51,191 --> 00:06:52,911 * * 173 00:06:53,111 --> 00:06:54,611 Man, this auction is blowing up. 174 00:06:54,811 --> 00:06:57,221 I've had to up my bid, 175 00:06:57,421 --> 00:06:58,251 Scent of a Woman. 176 00:06:58,451 --> 00:07:00,241 How could I be so stupid? 177 00:07:01,001 --> 00:07:03,061 Okay. All right. 178 00:07:03,261 --> 00:07:04,821 Okay, here we go-- oh. 179 00:07:05,021 --> 00:07:05,991 Oh... 180 00:07:06,191 --> 00:07:07,191 (clears throat) 181 00:07:07,391 --> 00:07:08,231 What are you boys 182 00:07:08,431 --> 00:07:10,281 Oh, you know, uh, watching porn. 183 00:07:11,481 --> 00:07:13,071 No, we are not. 184 00:07:13,271 --> 00:07:14,701 Oh. 185 00:07:14,901 --> 00:07:16,131 I get it. I get it. 186 00:07:16,331 --> 00:07:18,801 The birthday girl is going 187 00:07:19,001 --> 00:07:19,971 Yeah. All right. 188 00:07:20,171 --> 00:07:21,241 Bye. 189 00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:22,841 Man, that was terrible. 190 00:07:23,041 --> 00:07:25,641 You're lucky I was here. 191 00:07:25,841 --> 00:07:26,611 (computer chimes) 192 00:07:26,811 --> 00:07:29,351 Oh. Oh, man, I got to up my bid. 193 00:07:29,551 --> 00:07:31,051 Down to the final five seconds. 194 00:07:31,251 --> 00:07:32,721 Okay, here we go. 195 00:07:32,921 --> 00:07:35,691 Three, two, one. 196 00:07:35,891 --> 00:07:37,061 Yeah! 197 00:07:37,261 --> 00:07:38,561 Yeah, baby! Let's go! 198 00:07:38,761 --> 00:07:40,011 You're going to the... 199 00:07:41,281 --> 00:07:44,481 Right, uh, wow, that is 200 00:07:46,821 --> 00:07:48,971 * * 201 00:07:49,171 --> 00:07:52,911 (playing poorly) 202 00:07:53,111 --> 00:07:54,991 * * 203 00:07:58,861 --> 00:08:01,881 Oh, wow. Aw. 204 00:08:02,081 --> 00:08:04,021 Oh, thank you, Grover. 205 00:08:04,221 --> 00:08:06,351 Bless your little heart. 206 00:08:06,551 --> 00:08:08,151 That was beautiful. 207 00:08:08,351 --> 00:08:09,791 What was that? 208 00:08:09,991 --> 00:08:12,541 I thought it was 209 00:08:14,781 --> 00:08:16,431 He's been working 210 00:08:16,631 --> 00:08:18,601 Yeah, that's easily 211 00:08:18,801 --> 00:08:20,131 Yeah. 212 00:08:20,331 --> 00:08:23,341 Well, thank you, Johnson family, 213 00:08:23,541 --> 00:08:24,841 And the concert. 214 00:08:25,041 --> 00:08:26,971 Yeah, yeah, uh, 215 00:08:27,171 --> 00:08:29,261 Open ours, Mommy. 216 00:08:30,031 --> 00:08:33,651 Okay, let me see 217 00:08:33,851 --> 00:08:35,031 Ugh. 218 00:08:38,931 --> 00:08:40,771 These are nice. 219 00:08:41,541 --> 00:08:43,921 Is that why you said "ugh"? 220 00:08:44,121 --> 00:08:45,821 Oh, did I? No, no, I... 221 00:08:46,021 --> 00:08:48,691 Well, they look 222 00:08:48,891 --> 00:08:50,701 No, no, no, no, no. 223 00:08:50,901 --> 00:08:52,201 They're just padded 224 00:08:52,401 --> 00:08:54,951 improve posture, 225 00:08:57,621 --> 00:08:59,141 Well, when you put 226 00:08:59,341 --> 00:09:00,961 Oh, damn. 227 00:09:03,531 --> 00:09:04,681 Oh, yeah. Look at that. 228 00:09:04,881 --> 00:09:06,561 They're endorsed by Marla Gibbs. 229 00:09:08,361 --> 00:09:11,101 Y'all got y'all mama 230 00:09:13,771 --> 00:09:15,391 We have got to get 231 00:09:15,591 --> 00:09:16,991 Oh, yeah, y'all 232 00:09:17,191 --> 00:09:18,591 Yeah, we know, Gemma. 233 00:09:18,791 --> 00:09:22,491 Well, babe, you're going 234 00:09:22,701 --> 00:09:24,701 your nice new Velcro kicks. 235 00:09:24,901 --> 00:09:27,971 So here you go. 236 00:09:28,171 --> 00:09:30,201 What'd you get me? 237 00:09:30,401 --> 00:09:31,701 Oh, my God! 238 00:09:31,901 --> 00:09:34,441 You got me four tickets 239 00:09:34,641 --> 00:09:36,541 I get to see 240 00:09:36,741 --> 00:09:40,751 Oh, baby, this is 241 00:09:40,951 --> 00:09:42,511 Hit it, Grover. I'm feeling it. 242 00:09:42,721 --> 00:09:44,351 (playing poorly) 243 00:09:44,551 --> 00:09:47,071 * * 244 00:09:56,751 --> 00:09:58,331 * * 245 00:09:58,531 --> 00:10:01,231 Baby, we are in the front row. 246 00:10:01,431 --> 00:10:03,671 I mean, Sheryl is 247 00:10:03,871 --> 00:10:04,941 I could touch her. 248 00:10:05,141 --> 00:10:06,241 Okay, you know what? 249 00:10:06,441 --> 00:10:07,911 gonna be right here 250 00:10:08,111 --> 00:10:09,171 Don't do that, okay? 251 00:10:09,371 --> 00:10:10,641 Okay. 252 00:10:10,841 --> 00:10:12,111 So exciting. 253 00:10:12,311 --> 00:10:13,711 You know, Jerry is 254 00:10:13,911 --> 00:10:16,751 This is the last chance for 255 00:10:16,951 --> 00:10:18,351 There is no friendship. 256 00:10:18,551 --> 00:10:21,941 Well, not with that 257 00:10:24,941 --> 00:10:26,321 ANNOUNCER: 258 00:10:26,521 --> 00:10:28,161 - * You and me * 259 00:10:28,361 --> 00:10:30,301 * You know we make 260 00:10:30,501 --> 00:10:31,531 * Company... * 261 00:10:31,731 --> 00:10:33,771 Oh, my God, it's Sheryl! 262 00:10:33,971 --> 00:10:35,701 * You know we make 263 00:10:35,901 --> 00:10:37,341 Hi, Sheryl! 264 00:10:37,541 --> 00:10:39,641 * * 265 00:10:39,841 --> 00:10:41,441 * Hoppin', we poppin', 266 00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:44,881 * Lord knows I love conversating 267 00:10:45,081 --> 00:10:47,881 (chanting): 268 00:10:48,081 --> 00:10:49,111 Jerry! 269 00:10:49,311 --> 00:10:50,721 Wrong show. Wrong Jerry. 270 00:10:50,921 --> 00:10:51,721 Stop doing that. 271 00:10:51,921 --> 00:10:53,371 (laughing) 272 00:10:54,941 --> 00:10:57,091 * * 273 00:10:57,291 --> 00:10:59,191 Okay, here's a gift idea. 274 00:10:59,391 --> 00:11:01,661 An LED light therapy 275 00:11:01,861 --> 00:11:03,201 Are you crazy? 276 00:11:03,401 --> 00:11:06,051 That'll be like telling Mama 277 00:11:08,981 --> 00:11:11,471 See, man, look, look. 278 00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:15,141 Ah. Things were so 279 00:11:15,341 --> 00:11:17,711 We made her an ugly necklace 280 00:11:17,911 --> 00:11:18,981 and she loved it. 281 00:11:19,181 --> 00:11:22,081 Oh, man. 282 00:11:22,281 --> 00:11:23,521 You know, one time 283 00:11:23,721 --> 00:11:25,951 I gave her a Lando Calrissian 284 00:11:26,151 --> 00:11:27,391 that she bought me, 285 00:11:27,591 --> 00:11:29,021 and she said it was 286 00:11:29,221 --> 00:11:32,711 Yeah, and then 287 00:11:33,511 --> 00:11:35,941 She wasn't gonna 288 00:11:36,911 --> 00:11:40,171 Well, as you know, we here on 289 00:11:40,371 --> 00:11:42,471 And today 290 00:11:42,671 --> 00:11:45,071 is going to share 291 00:11:45,271 --> 00:11:46,771 (cheering and applauding) 292 00:11:46,971 --> 00:11:49,411 And spoiler alert, 293 00:11:49,611 --> 00:11:50,581 So good. 294 00:11:50,781 --> 00:11:52,341 Oh, you guys, stop. 295 00:11:52,541 --> 00:11:54,681 Okay, now, I'm going 296 00:11:54,881 --> 00:11:57,751 lucky audience members 297 00:11:57,951 --> 00:11:59,121 Anybody hungry? 298 00:11:59,321 --> 00:12:00,351 Me! Me, me, me! Me! 299 00:12:00,551 --> 00:12:01,951 I'm starving, I'm starving! 300 00:12:02,151 --> 00:12:03,721 Hey, birthday girl. 301 00:12:03,921 --> 00:12:05,921 Oh, yeah, a-and the 302 00:12:06,121 --> 00:12:07,091 And the birthday girl's friend. 303 00:12:07,291 --> 00:12:08,461 Okay, you four. Come on. 304 00:12:08,661 --> 00:12:09,631 Oh. Okay! 305 00:12:09,831 --> 00:12:11,631 Come on, baby. 306 00:12:11,831 --> 00:12:13,301 Oh, I'm so excited. 307 00:12:13,501 --> 00:12:14,631 Hey. 308 00:12:14,831 --> 00:12:16,871 Come on up. 309 00:12:17,071 --> 00:12:19,571 Okay, okay. 310 00:12:19,771 --> 00:12:21,071 Pasadena, Sheryl. 311 00:12:21,271 --> 00:12:22,711 Uh-huh. 312 00:12:22,911 --> 00:12:24,281 All day, every day. 313 00:12:24,481 --> 00:12:27,311 Sheryl is standing right here, 314 00:12:27,511 --> 00:12:28,711 I can see that, babe. 315 00:12:28,911 --> 00:12:30,381 Was 'cause your man 316 00:12:30,581 --> 00:12:31,651 a great birthday present. 317 00:12:31,851 --> 00:12:33,221 Yes, you did, baby... 318 00:12:33,421 --> 00:12:35,051 And your birthday's 319 00:12:35,251 --> 00:12:37,191 because I'm going 320 00:12:37,391 --> 00:12:38,321 GEMMA: Ooh. 321 00:12:38,521 --> 00:12:39,931 (audience applauding) 322 00:12:40,131 --> 00:12:41,691 Hey, Jerry O'Connell. 323 00:12:41,891 --> 00:12:45,551 Why don't you come 324 00:12:46,881 --> 00:12:48,531 Yes, that was, uh, that was 325 00:12:48,731 --> 00:12:51,021 a movie I was actually in. 326 00:12:51,821 --> 00:12:53,741 Very good. 327 00:12:53,941 --> 00:12:56,171 Yes. Show me the chili! 328 00:12:56,371 --> 00:12:58,041 Okay. Yeah. 329 00:12:58,241 --> 00:12:59,981 Let's move on. We're moving on. 330 00:13:00,181 --> 00:13:01,181 DAVE: 331 00:13:01,381 --> 00:13:04,221 Okay, I need an assistant chef. 332 00:13:04,421 --> 00:13:05,751 Oh, oh, you got to pick my baby. 333 00:13:05,951 --> 00:13:08,551 She's been cooking me the best 334 00:13:08,751 --> 00:13:09,691 Oh, stop it, baby. 335 00:13:09,891 --> 00:13:13,261 Oh, looks like 336 00:13:13,461 --> 00:13:16,661 Oh, wow. Mom is on TV 337 00:13:16,861 --> 00:13:18,761 DAVE: What kind of cheese 338 00:13:18,961 --> 00:13:24,321 Jerry O'Connell? Monterey Jack 339 00:13:25,091 --> 00:13:27,191 Oh, David. 340 00:13:28,261 --> 00:13:30,281 As every great cook knows, 341 00:13:30,481 --> 00:13:32,851 the secret to chili 342 00:13:33,051 --> 00:13:35,181 And I got my own 343 00:13:35,381 --> 00:13:37,621 Cayenne. 344 00:13:37,821 --> 00:13:40,051 Paprika. 345 00:13:40,251 --> 00:13:41,051 Mustard seed. 346 00:13:41,251 --> 00:13:43,091 AKBAR: Ooh. 347 00:13:43,291 --> 00:13:46,161 And a little something-something 348 00:13:46,361 --> 00:13:47,531 Horseradish. 349 00:13:47,731 --> 00:13:49,191 Mm. Mm-mm. Mm-mm. 350 00:13:49,391 --> 00:13:50,631 NATALIE: 351 00:13:50,831 --> 00:13:52,901 you have Sheryl's chili 352 00:13:53,101 --> 00:13:54,531 so let's dig in. 353 00:13:54,731 --> 00:13:56,231 DAVE: All right. 354 00:13:56,431 --> 00:13:59,171 AKBAR: Okay. 355 00:13:59,371 --> 00:14:01,171 (clears throat) Mmm. 356 00:14:01,371 --> 00:14:03,411 Mmm. 357 00:14:03,611 --> 00:14:04,811 This is so good, Sheryl. 358 00:14:05,011 --> 00:14:06,041 It's really good. 359 00:14:06,241 --> 00:14:08,011 Here you go, 360 00:14:08,211 --> 00:14:10,681 Bon appétit. 361 00:14:10,881 --> 00:14:13,471 Thank you, Sheryl. 362 00:14:20,411 --> 00:14:22,361 You don't like it? 363 00:14:22,561 --> 00:14:24,511 I do. It's so good. 364 00:14:25,951 --> 00:14:27,831 This is a masterpiece. Yeah. 365 00:14:28,031 --> 00:14:31,691 You know what? All this need 366 00:14:34,091 --> 00:14:36,211 Tina doesn't like my chili. 367 00:14:36,411 --> 00:14:37,781 You all like my chili, right? 368 00:14:37,981 --> 00:14:40,111 Oh, yeah, yeah, so, so good. 369 00:14:40,311 --> 00:14:41,511 Amazing. 370 00:14:41,711 --> 00:14:43,851 I'm almost done. Yeah. 371 00:14:44,051 --> 00:14:46,151 So it's just you. 372 00:14:46,351 --> 00:14:48,451 No, no, no. 373 00:14:48,651 --> 00:14:50,291 I love it. The chili is good. 374 00:14:50,491 --> 00:14:51,921 Okay, then-then 375 00:14:52,121 --> 00:14:53,031 Go ahead. 376 00:14:53,231 --> 00:14:55,731 Okay, let me... 377 00:14:55,931 --> 00:14:58,561 ...have some more chili. 378 00:14:58,761 --> 00:15:00,451 (groans) 379 00:15:07,561 --> 00:15:09,041 I think this segment is over. 380 00:15:09,241 --> 00:15:13,151 And I think y'all been lying 381 00:15:13,351 --> 00:15:14,481 JERRY: 382 00:15:14,681 --> 00:15:16,511 We're going to pay 383 00:15:16,711 --> 00:15:18,951 We'll be right back 384 00:15:19,151 --> 00:15:21,341 (audience applauding) 385 00:15:22,441 --> 00:15:24,321 AKBAR: 386 00:15:24,521 --> 00:15:27,831 Oh, Sheryl, don't be like that. 387 00:15:28,031 --> 00:15:29,231 See what you did, Akbar? 388 00:15:29,431 --> 00:15:31,601 Sheryl! 389 00:15:31,801 --> 00:15:34,931 * * 390 00:15:35,131 --> 00:15:37,041 Hey. Gemma? 391 00:15:37,241 --> 00:15:38,701 Calvin, what are you doing here? 392 00:15:38,901 --> 00:15:42,771 (sighs) Look, I need 393 00:15:42,971 --> 00:15:45,141 I need to talk 394 00:15:45,341 --> 00:15:47,381 No. Nuh-uh. 395 00:15:47,581 --> 00:15:48,981 After what happened 396 00:15:49,181 --> 00:15:51,151 Well, that's the thing. 397 00:15:51,351 --> 00:15:53,851 Look, I finally got Tina 398 00:15:54,051 --> 00:15:56,741 and it wound up being 399 00:15:57,941 --> 00:16:01,991 She told me she wished 400 00:16:02,191 --> 00:16:04,501 I understand. 401 00:16:04,701 --> 00:16:06,231 But I can't allow you 402 00:16:06,431 --> 00:16:08,031 a parent on school property 403 00:16:08,231 --> 00:16:09,601 without proper... 404 00:16:09,801 --> 00:16:11,541 Ooh, there he is. 405 00:16:11,741 --> 00:16:15,711 Jerry. Oh, sorry. 406 00:16:15,911 --> 00:16:17,111 (stammering) 407 00:16:17,311 --> 00:16:18,881 You okay? 408 00:16:19,081 --> 00:16:20,581 Whoa, whoa, whoa. 409 00:16:20,781 --> 00:16:22,251 that guy Dave 410 00:16:22,451 --> 00:16:24,251 Uh... 411 00:16:24,451 --> 00:16:27,301 Oh, no, no, no, I barely 412 00:16:28,241 --> 00:16:30,361 Hey, look, Jerry, um, 413 00:16:30,561 --> 00:16:32,991 my wife Tina, 414 00:16:33,191 --> 00:16:37,061 and, uh, this morning, you know, 415 00:16:37,261 --> 00:16:39,001 Uh, I think we should move on. 416 00:16:39,201 --> 00:16:41,671 Here's the weighted blanket 417 00:16:41,871 --> 00:16:45,001 (grunting) 418 00:16:45,201 --> 00:16:46,241 You okay? 419 00:16:46,441 --> 00:16:47,711 I got it, I got it. 420 00:16:47,911 --> 00:16:50,381 Look, I-I was just hoping 421 00:16:50,581 --> 00:16:52,381 you could put Tina 422 00:16:52,581 --> 00:16:54,081 so that she can apologize. 423 00:16:54,281 --> 00:16:55,451 Well, I-I'd love 424 00:16:55,651 --> 00:16:56,911 but Sheryl is not 425 00:16:57,121 --> 00:16:58,521 Sheryl's upset with 426 00:16:58,721 --> 00:17:00,621 more real with her 427 00:17:00,821 --> 00:17:02,151 which is not great chili. 428 00:17:02,351 --> 00:17:06,521 Yeah, I'm not sure 429 00:17:06,721 --> 00:17:08,461 We were just trying 430 00:17:08,661 --> 00:17:10,731 and now Sheryl's 431 00:17:10,931 --> 00:17:12,631 She said she's never 432 00:17:12,831 --> 00:17:16,901 O-Okay, well, maybe 433 00:17:17,101 --> 00:17:18,671 Come on, let me help you 434 00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:21,541 (grunts) 435 00:17:21,741 --> 00:17:23,411 my wife makes a mean chili. 436 00:17:23,611 --> 00:17:25,311 Oh, I certainly 437 00:17:25,511 --> 00:17:26,881 (chuckles) 438 00:17:27,081 --> 00:17:28,981 That's my wife 439 00:17:29,181 --> 00:17:31,821 * * 440 00:17:32,021 --> 00:17:34,291 SHERYL: 441 00:17:34,491 --> 00:17:36,971 Right there. 442 00:17:38,811 --> 00:17:42,331 Yeah. That's not pretty. 443 00:17:42,531 --> 00:17:43,501 You're an attractive woman, 444 00:17:43,701 --> 00:17:45,651 but that's not a good face. 445 00:17:46,581 --> 00:17:49,131 Babe, I know your 446 00:17:49,331 --> 00:17:51,951 Are you day-drinking with Dave? 447 00:17:53,221 --> 00:17:56,221 You know, I don't think 448 00:17:57,021 --> 00:17:59,141 Anyway, look, I know 449 00:17:59,341 --> 00:18:00,451 but I got one more gift for you, 450 00:18:00,651 --> 00:18:02,351 and it's a chance 451 00:18:02,551 --> 00:18:04,651 I just want you... 452 00:18:04,851 --> 00:18:06,531 like I'm an Amazon package? 453 00:18:08,671 --> 00:18:09,751 Hello, Tina. 454 00:18:09,951 --> 00:18:12,661 Calvin, Sheryl Underwood 455 00:18:12,861 --> 00:18:15,431 I know, babe. I brought her. 456 00:18:15,631 --> 00:18:17,631 Sheryl Underwood, 457 00:18:17,831 --> 00:18:20,401 I am so sorry 458 00:18:20,601 --> 00:18:22,371 It's, it's just my face. 459 00:18:22,571 --> 00:18:23,801 It-it won't lie. 460 00:18:24,001 --> 00:18:25,441 Girl, I know it. 461 00:18:25,641 --> 00:18:27,821 I watched it back on slow-mo. 462 00:18:29,491 --> 00:18:30,741 But I want to thank you. 463 00:18:30,941 --> 00:18:33,041 You were the only one 464 00:18:33,251 --> 00:18:34,481 Oh. 465 00:18:34,681 --> 00:18:37,781 I hated the chili, too. 466 00:18:37,981 --> 00:18:41,421 Little late, 467 00:18:41,621 --> 00:18:43,861 Uh, so he mentioned me? 468 00:18:44,061 --> 00:18:46,991 Nobody's talking 469 00:18:47,191 --> 00:18:49,991 Tina, I brought Sheryl here 470 00:18:50,191 --> 00:18:51,661 how to make chili 471 00:18:51,861 --> 00:18:53,571 Oh, hell yeah, I will. 472 00:18:53,771 --> 00:18:56,101 Come on, girl. Let me 473 00:18:56,301 --> 00:18:58,141 That's all right, girl. 474 00:18:58,341 --> 00:19:00,411 I got one. 475 00:19:00,611 --> 00:19:03,481 Calvin! Sheryl Underwood 476 00:19:03,681 --> 00:19:04,981 I can see. 477 00:19:05,181 --> 00:19:08,201 This is the best birthday ever. 478 00:19:09,461 --> 00:19:10,821 So, what do I need to know? 479 00:19:11,021 --> 00:19:13,151 Okay, first off, 480 00:19:13,351 --> 00:19:14,721 That's my mother's recipe. 481 00:19:14,921 --> 00:19:16,891 Oh, she doesn't know 482 00:19:17,091 --> 00:19:18,071 Tina! 483 00:19:24,281 --> 00:19:25,861 Ooh, okay. 484 00:19:26,061 --> 00:19:27,571 Keep your eyes closed. 485 00:19:27,771 --> 00:19:31,101 Okay. Almost. 486 00:19:31,301 --> 00:19:32,771 And open 'em. 487 00:19:32,971 --> 00:19:34,591 Ta-da! 488 00:19:35,691 --> 00:19:37,111 Wow. What's all this? 489 00:19:37,311 --> 00:19:38,311 It's your present. 490 00:19:38,511 --> 00:19:40,251 Look, Ma, we-we were 491 00:19:40,451 --> 00:19:42,181 the perfect birthday 492 00:19:42,381 --> 00:19:45,651 and we remembered that 493 00:19:45,851 --> 00:19:47,051 Aw. 494 00:19:47,251 --> 00:19:49,091 We remember this day 495 00:19:49,291 --> 00:19:50,461 so we decided to recreate it. 496 00:19:50,661 --> 00:19:53,761 Oh, thank you. 497 00:19:53,961 --> 00:19:54,761 Yep. 498 00:19:54,961 --> 00:19:56,811 Tuna fish and Cheetos. 499 00:19:57,711 --> 00:19:59,001 (laughs) 500 00:19:59,201 --> 00:20:00,901 There it is. 501 00:20:01,101 --> 00:20:03,071 But I love it. I will eat it. 502 00:20:03,271 --> 00:20:05,771 Thank you. Boys, this is... 503 00:20:05,971 --> 00:20:07,811 This is all I could want. 504 00:20:08,011 --> 00:20:08,971 Mwah. 505 00:20:09,171 --> 00:20:10,011 My babies. Mwah. 506 00:20:10,211 --> 00:20:11,311 Happy birthday, Mama. 507 00:20:11,511 --> 00:20:12,681 Thank you. This is... 508 00:20:12,881 --> 00:20:14,081 I need you to smile, 509 00:20:14,281 --> 00:20:15,081 All right, come on. 510 00:20:15,281 --> 00:20:16,611 Let's take a picture 511 00:20:16,811 --> 00:20:18,551 with my babies. 512 00:20:18,751 --> 00:20:21,021 Here we go. 513 00:20:21,221 --> 00:20:22,621 Three, two... 514 00:20:22,821 --> 00:20:24,361 What y'all looking at? 515 00:20:24,561 --> 00:20:25,621 Dad. 516 00:20:25,821 --> 00:20:27,991 We're trying to recreate 517 00:20:28,191 --> 00:20:29,631 Oh, but, man, 518 00:20:29,831 --> 00:20:31,361 That's okay, baby, why don't 519 00:20:31,561 --> 00:20:33,321 Oh, okay. All right, good. 520 00:20:33,821 --> 00:20:35,501 Come on, baby. Here we go. 521 00:20:35,701 --> 00:20:37,471 And three, two-- 522 00:20:37,671 --> 00:20:39,271 Ooh, do I smell 523 00:20:39,471 --> 00:20:40,371 Ah, Dave. 524 00:20:40,571 --> 00:20:42,241 They're trying to take a photo. 525 00:20:42,441 --> 00:20:45,281 Oh, you know what? Let's just 526 00:20:45,481 --> 00:20:46,741 Come on. Here we go. 527 00:20:46,941 --> 00:20:48,451 CALVIN: Get in. Get in. 528 00:20:48,651 --> 00:20:49,551 And... 529 00:20:49,751 --> 00:20:52,021 All right, everybody say chili. 530 00:20:52,221 --> 00:20:53,421 Chili! 531 00:20:53,621 --> 00:20:55,551 Captioning sponsored by 532 00:20:55,751 --> 00:20:57,671 and TOYOTA. 533 00:21:02,481 --> 00:21:05,911 Captioned by30964

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