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1
00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:02,440
'This is Shelly.
Leave a message after the...
2
00:00:02,440 --> 00:00:05,360
# Do, re, mi, fa, so, la, ti... #
3
00:00:05,360 --> 00:00:06,800
ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS
4
00:00:06,800 --> 00:00:10,040
I'm just phoning... If, erm...
5
00:00:10,040 --> 00:00:13,200
If you think there's any chance
of us getting back together...
6
00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:15,840
just give me a sign.
7
00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:17,880
DOORBELL RINGS
8
00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:19,240
Oh, what are you two doing here?
9
00:00:19,240 --> 00:00:21,440
I have that tree-hugging retreat
thing, remember?
10
00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:23,280
You said Roly could
stay over the weekend.
11
00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:25,240
Yeah, I didn't think you were being
serious.
12
00:00:25,240 --> 00:00:28,800
My flat's not really child-proofed.
There's rusty nails everywhere.
13
00:00:28,800 --> 00:00:30,640
He's had his tetanus jab.
14
00:00:30,640 --> 00:00:33,280
Oh, come on,
how can you say no to this face?
15
00:00:34,480 --> 00:00:38,280
This programme contains
strong language.
16
00:00:38,280 --> 00:00:39,800
What's with the giant bag?
17
00:00:39,800 --> 00:00:42,080
He's only staying for three days.
That's his tent.
18
00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:44,640
He brings it to all of his
sleepovers. It keeps him safe.
19
00:00:44,640 --> 00:00:45,840
What from? Jaguars?
20
00:00:45,840 --> 00:00:48,120
Germs. I wrote a song about it.
Do you want to hear?
21
00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:49,360
Maybe a bit later.
22
00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:51,400
Why don't you go
and wash your hands, darling?
23
00:00:51,400 --> 00:00:53,560
Thanks for this.
I feel really guilty leaving him,
24
00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:57,280
but my lawyer and my therapist
say that I need to centre myself
25
00:00:57,280 --> 00:00:59,920
so I'm not a mess during the custody
verdict next week.
26
00:00:59,920 --> 00:01:03,040
If I try calling, don't answer me.
I need tough love.
27
00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:04,840
Tough love's my specialty.
28
00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:08,040
Shelly's stopped talking to me.
What is it with you?
29
00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:10,960
Why do you only fall in love
after you've ruined things horribly?
30
00:01:10,960 --> 00:01:13,440
I guess I'm just...romantic that
way?
31
00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:17,520
What is it with the mints?
32
00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:19,880
I don't know.
He's on an oral-hygiene kick.
33
00:01:19,880 --> 00:01:22,480
Anyway I've got to go.
I love you, munchkin!
34
00:01:24,080 --> 00:01:25,800
Call me if you need anything.
35
00:01:25,800 --> 00:01:27,400
Like child-sized body bags?
36
00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:31,760
I made a schedule
for the next three days.
37
00:01:31,760 --> 00:01:34,080
You've laminated it.
I have a machine.
38
00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:37,080
It's got everything on it.
Meal times, bedtimes, poo times.
39
00:01:37,080 --> 00:01:39,680
What are we meant to be doing now?
"Explain schedule to Andy."
40
00:01:39,680 --> 00:01:41,280
Tomorrow we've got the planetarium.
41
00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:42,760
They've got a black hole exhibit.
42
00:01:42,760 --> 00:01:45,280
You want to know about black holes?
Look at my bank account.
43
00:01:45,280 --> 00:01:48,040
How are we going to afford all that?
Mum gave me some pocket money.
44
00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:50,040
Probably best if you let me
hang on to that.
45
00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:52,440
No. You'll just waste it
on beer and cigarettes.
46
00:01:52,440 --> 00:01:54,440
Now, I've got
biology homework to do,
47
00:01:54,440 --> 00:01:57,320
so I'm going to need
total peace and quiet.
48
00:01:57,320 --> 00:01:58,960
COMPUTER GAME BLARES
49
00:02:00,840 --> 00:02:02,200
Can you turn that down, please?
50
00:02:02,200 --> 00:02:05,280
Killing zombies quietly,
it's like trying to fart daintily.
51
00:02:05,280 --> 00:02:06,840
It can't be done.
52
00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:08,120
Why don't you have a go?
53
00:02:08,120 --> 00:02:10,920
You haven't lived until you've blown
a zombie's brains out.
54
00:02:10,920 --> 00:02:14,320
If I do will you buy me sushi for
dinner? If you kill 20 zombies.
55
00:02:16,360 --> 00:02:18,760
That is run and that is fire.
56
00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:26,960
You've taken to that
like a zombie...to brains.
57
00:02:32,880 --> 00:02:36,080
How are you feeling
about the custody verdict?
58
00:02:36,080 --> 00:02:38,960
You're just trying to distract me so
you won't have to pay for sushi.
59
00:02:38,960 --> 00:02:40,640
No, I'm serious. I mean, basically,
60
00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:42,720
you've got a judge
that's going to come along
61
00:02:42,720 --> 00:02:46,240
and decide on your
whole future living schedule, right?
62
00:02:46,240 --> 00:02:48,360
And we all know how much you
love a schedule.
63
00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:51,440
I don't mind really,
as long as Mum and Dad are happy.
64
00:02:51,440 --> 00:02:53,360
Yeah, but what makes you happy?
65
00:02:53,360 --> 00:02:56,080
I don't know. What makes you happy?
66
00:02:56,080 --> 00:02:58,160
Bingo, 20 zombies.
67
00:02:58,160 --> 00:03:00,080
Yeah, hm.
68
00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:02,360
PHONE RINGS
Hang on.
69
00:03:02,360 --> 00:03:04,160
Hello?
70
00:03:04,160 --> 00:03:05,800
Yes.
71
00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:08,640
Yes. Right now?
72
00:03:08,640 --> 00:03:10,480
I mean, yeah, we can.
73
00:03:11,440 --> 00:03:12,720
OK. Thanks.
74
00:03:14,240 --> 00:03:17,840
That was Rage Records. That was Rage
Records! I-I-I sent them a demo
75
00:03:17,840 --> 00:03:21,000
and a clip of us playing
and Mo Khan at Rage Records,
76
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:23,640
he wants us to come in right now
for a meeting with them.
77
00:03:23,640 --> 00:03:26,200
Who's Mo Khan?
Mo Khan of Rage Records!
78
00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:29,920
He's Like the Simon Cowell of
Rage Records only without the moobs.
79
00:03:29,920 --> 00:03:31,920
I mean, if he tweets about us once,
80
00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:33,880
we are pretty much
automatically famous.
81
00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:36,240
But I can't. I haven't
finished my biology homework.
82
00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:38,040
RAGE RECORDS!
83
00:03:38,040 --> 00:03:40,240
I have sacrificed
my entire weekend for you.
84
00:03:40,240 --> 00:03:42,200
If you come with me and do this,
85
00:03:42,200 --> 00:03:44,040
I will buy you
all the sushi in Tokyo.
86
00:03:45,680 --> 00:03:48,400
If they offer drinks, say yes.
Always say yes to drinks.
87
00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:50,320
What if I'm not thirsty?
88
00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:53,760
That brings me to my next point -
don't be weird.
89
00:03:53,760 --> 00:03:55,600
Weird? How am I weird?
90
00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:04,120
Do you think they'd like to hear
my germ song? No.
91
00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:07,280
We're not playing anything. Never
play at meetings. It looks
desperate.
92
00:04:07,280 --> 00:04:08,880
Mr Khan will see you now.
93
00:04:08,880 --> 00:04:11,760
OK, most important of all -
94
00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:14,960
remember, be cool.
95
00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:17,240
MINTS CASCADE TO FLOOR
96
00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:20,440
AMERICAN ACCENT: Yeah.
This is the one
97
00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:23,160
cos it's fucked up and I love it.
Oh, shit. Gotta go.
98
00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:25,920
Yo! Errol and Andy.
The Bear Maximum.
99
00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:28,640
Can Trix get you guys a drink?
Orange juice? Coke? Vodka?
100
00:04:28,640 --> 00:04:30,240
You look like a daytime drinker.
101
00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:32,000
Could I have a coconut water,
please?
102
00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:34,080
I'll have a Virgin Mary.
Easy on the virgin.
103
00:04:34,080 --> 00:04:35,760
Sit. Relax. Make yourselves at home.
104
00:04:37,840 --> 00:04:39,360
Don't touch that.
105
00:04:40,640 --> 00:04:42,080
What do you think?
106
00:04:42,080 --> 00:04:44,480
Wow. I love that
107
00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:46,240
Correct answer.
These guys will be huge,
108
00:04:46,240 --> 00:04:48,200
like the Pet Shop Boys
without the gay stuff.
109
00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:52,160
Their new single's called Man-gerie.
You should check it out. Man-gerie?
110
00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:55,080
As in men's lingerie. It's dope.
Errol, you don't seem sold?
111
00:04:55,080 --> 00:04:56,880
That's just his face.
112
00:04:56,880 --> 00:05:00,040
It's nothing. It's just
that picture is a bit...silly.
113
00:05:01,080 --> 00:05:02,320
You're right.
114
00:05:03,880 --> 00:05:06,160
So, what's the deal here.
Are you his dad?
115
00:05:06,160 --> 00:05:07,920
I'm his uncle, actually.
116
00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:10,400
Cool. You're like indie rock's
answer to LMFAO.
117
00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:13,240
Well, that sounds LMFAO-wesome.
118
00:05:15,120 --> 00:05:16,360
You don't say much, do you?
119
00:05:16,360 --> 00:05:18,560
I'm not weird. Ha-ha!
120
00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:23,880
Can I just say, Mo, what an honour
it would be to be on your record
label.
121
00:05:23,880 --> 00:05:26,680
To be honest,
I wasn't 100% sold on your demo.
122
00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:29,120
That's why I brought you in -
to hear the magic for myself.
123
00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:31,400
Sorry. We don't
have our instruments with us.
124
00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:34,400
No probs. We've got a guitar
and keyboard right over there,
125
00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:36,120
but you should go and
warm up your voice.
126
00:05:36,120 --> 00:05:38,600
I never warm up my voice.
127
00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:39,920
You should go warm up.
128
00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:44,960
Erm, sure.
129
00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:46,960
Always a first for everything.
130
00:05:51,320 --> 00:05:53,640
Can I get you anything else?
Cupcakes, bison burger,
131
00:05:53,640 --> 00:05:56,280
a bowl of Starmix with all
the orange and yellows picked out?
132
00:05:56,280 --> 00:05:58,120
Do you have any mints?
133
00:05:59,080 --> 00:06:01,680
Keep them.
I want to be honest with you, kid.
134
00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:03,480
I'm not interested
in The Bear Maximum.
135
00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:05,200
The name sucks and the sound blows.
136
00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:07,400
Do you know what
I am interested in, though?
137
00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,400
Coconuts?
138
00:06:09,400 --> 00:06:11,720
You. You're the main attraction,
my friend.
139
00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:12,960
When I saw you in that clip,
140
00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:15,120
I knew I was looking at
the next Conor Maynard.
141
00:06:15,120 --> 00:06:16,520
Who? Exactly.
142
00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:19,320
When I'm done with you, you'll blow
the competition out the water.
143
00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:21,360
I'm going to make you a pop star.
144
00:06:21,360 --> 00:06:24,880
Kid, I want to sign you right now.
What do you say?
145
00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:26,280
But what about my Uncle Andy?
146
00:06:26,280 --> 00:06:28,480
Will you just forget about your
uncle a second?
147
00:06:28,480 --> 00:06:30,360
Think about you and your whole
family.
148
00:06:30,360 --> 00:06:32,960
You'll be able to buy your mum
a house, your dad a yacht,
149
00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:35,360
your uncle his own studio.
Hell, his own label!
150
00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:36,800
You'll all be happy.
151
00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:39,560
You're not going to mess this up.
You're not going to mess this up.
152
00:06:39,560 --> 00:06:41,680
You're not going to mess this up.
153
00:06:43,160 --> 00:06:44,960
Are you going to mess this up?
154
00:06:44,960 --> 00:06:46,680
If you go solo,
you'll be able to
155
00:06:46,680 --> 00:06:49,000
write your own songs,
pick your own sound.
156
00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:50,320
You'll be rich and famous.
157
00:06:50,320 --> 00:06:54,280
If your uncle really cares about
you, he'll man up and step aside.
158
00:06:54,280 --> 00:06:58,080
So what do you say?
You want to be a star?
159
00:06:59,200 --> 00:07:04,040
Famous people have no privacy,
so how will I go to the planetarium?
160
00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:07,160
Kid, when I'm done with you, you'll
be able to buy the planetarium.
161
00:07:10,120 --> 00:07:13,520
You won't regret this.
I'll have the contracts drawn up
for your parents to sign.
162
00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:15,360
You want me
to break the news to your uncle?
163
00:07:15,360 --> 00:07:17,480
No! I'll tell him.
He can be a bit sensitive.
164
00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:19,160
All right, let's do this!
165
00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:20,800
You know what?
166
00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:24,480
I have another meeting now, but
we're having a party tomorrow night.
167
00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:28,240
You two should definitely come. I
could introduce you to some people,
168
00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:30,000
keep this vibe going.
What do you say?
169
00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:34,160
# I'm fucking famous, bitch
170
00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:35,880
# I'm also stupid rich
171
00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:38,240
# You see my plan
You understand
172
00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:40,720
# Has gone without a hitch
173
00:07:40,720 --> 00:07:42,640
# I'm fucking living it
174
00:07:42,640 --> 00:07:44,680
# I do not give a shit
175
00:07:44,680 --> 00:07:47,320
# I'm in the band and in demand
176
00:07:47,320 --> 00:07:49,320
# I'm fucking famous, bitch
177
00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:52,000
RAPS: It's been a long time coming
And I've finally made it
178
00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:54,160
I've been busting my arse
And I'm finally famous
179
00:07:54,160 --> 00:07:56,280
I've got the world in my palms
Got the girls on my arms
180
00:07:56,280 --> 00:07:58,600
I'm the man with the plan
Better raise the alarm
181
00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:00,760
This is to the pricks
that ever doubted my talent
182
00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:02,920
I'm fucking famouser than you
so it should be apparent
183
00:08:02,920 --> 00:08:04,960
Every single dick
that ever said I was shit
184
00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:07,120
Will be choking on their words
when I'm spitting the hits
185
00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:09,600
I'm getting absolutely everything
that I ever wanted
186
00:08:09,600 --> 00:08:11,800
If you're a legend like me then you
might as well flaunt it
187
00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:13,800
I got a gold record like an
over-achiever
188
00:08:13,800 --> 00:08:15,960
I bought a gold car and a golden
retriever
189
00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:18,280
I jump to the front
I don't know what a queue is
190
00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:20,520
Got a throne in my home
that I bought from John Lewis
191
00:08:20,520 --> 00:08:22,400
All of my clothes
are Abercrombie & Fitch
192
00:08:22,400 --> 00:08:24,680
They don't even fit me
but I'm famous, bitch
193
00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:30,360
# I am a millionaire
I live without a care
194
00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:34,760
# I'm so well known, I'm fully grown
This is all my own hair
195
00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:37,000
# I got the perfect pitch
196
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:39,240
# I sunk your battleship
197
00:08:39,240 --> 00:08:41,600
# I've got the fame, you know my
name
198
00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:43,680
# I'm fucking famous, bitch! #
199
00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:49,920
ANDY CONTINUES TO
HUM/GRUNT THE TUNE
200
00:08:52,320 --> 00:08:54,720
Uncle Andy? Mm?
201
00:08:54,720 --> 00:08:56,960
Would you still be happy
if you weren't famous?
202
00:08:56,960 --> 00:08:59,520
I've tried living the life of
an anonymous rock star
203
00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:00,600
and it ain't pretty.
204
00:09:00,600 --> 00:09:05,120
Do you know, next week I've got
an interview at Carpet Brothers.
205
00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:09,520
Carpet Brothers! That's how close
my life was to being over.
206
00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:11,040
Every single music executive
207
00:09:11,040 --> 00:09:13,840
that has ever turned me down
is going to be at that party
208
00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:18,200
and I can't wait to see the look
on their faces when Mo Khan
209
00:09:18,200 --> 00:09:22,080
shows US off like his new girlfriend
with the big, massive tits.
210
00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:24,080
And, yes, they are real.
211
00:09:24,080 --> 00:09:25,920
But do you know
the best part about this is?
212
00:09:25,920 --> 00:09:29,200
We're going to be doing this
together.
213
00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:31,960
What were you talking to Mo about
when I wasn't in the room?
214
00:09:31,960 --> 00:09:34,080
Planetariums.
215
00:09:34,080 --> 00:09:36,760
Ha! What a couple of dorks!
216
00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:39,640
ANDY MIMICS AN EXPLOSION
217
00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:40,760
What do you think?
218
00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:42,000
You look like a vicar.
219
00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:45,040
I look like a domino.
I look like a sexy, sexy domino.
220
00:09:45,040 --> 00:09:46,600
People love dominos.
221
00:09:46,600 --> 00:09:48,360
Domino's Pizza, Fats Domino...
222
00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:49,760
I don't think it's a good idea
223
00:09:49,760 --> 00:09:51,920
buying an expensive suit
just for one night.
224
00:09:51,920 --> 00:09:54,840
You said you were broke. So you'll
be chipping in your pocket money.
225
00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:57,440
No way. That's for the planetarium.
What's more important?
226
00:09:57,440 --> 00:09:59,800
Us looking good on the most
important night of our lives
227
00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:01,280
or going to some planet aquarium?
228
00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:03,480
ANDY'S PHONE RINGS
229
00:10:04,680 --> 00:10:05,760
Yep?
230
00:10:05,760 --> 00:10:07,800
I told you not to answer
if I called. Sh!
231
00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:09,080
Why did you call then?
232
00:10:09,080 --> 00:10:11,400
To see if you'd answer.
How's Roly? Is he missing me?
233
00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:13,120
Have you been to the
black hole exhibit?
234
00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:15,400
The little fella
had some bad sushi last night.
235
00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:17,520
We're kind of taking it easy today.
Ugh...
236
00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:20,640
Oh, no, does he want me to come
home? I can be there in 45 minutes.
237
00:10:20,640 --> 00:10:23,360
Sh! (You shush!) No, he's fine.
I've got it under control.
238
00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:24,600
How are things with you?
239
00:10:24,600 --> 00:10:25,920
Great, it's really relaxing.
240
00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:27,920
I have to find my tree tonight
and bond with it,
241
00:10:27,920 --> 00:10:30,400
so I'll basically just be hugging
a giant wooden penis.
242
00:10:30,400 --> 00:10:32,320
SH! (Ohh...)
243
00:10:32,320 --> 00:10:33,880
Well, watch out for splinters.
244
00:10:33,880 --> 00:10:37,120
Better run, Roly's sushi looks like
it's coming up for an encore.
245
00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:38,680
Ugh! Bye.
246
00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:41,360
Sh!
247
00:10:41,360 --> 00:10:44,800
MUSIC: "Satisfaction"
by Benny Benassi
248
00:10:48,840 --> 00:10:50,280
Errol!
249
00:10:54,720 --> 00:10:57,040
This is stupid.
250
00:10:57,040 --> 00:10:59,720
I feel like a ventriloquist's dummy.
251
00:10:59,720 --> 00:11:02,040
This is marketing. We're a band.
252
00:11:02,040 --> 00:11:03,720
That's like being in the cool gang.
253
00:11:03,720 --> 00:11:05,520
You look like a tiny ringleader.
254
00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:10,680
Those people shouldn't be smoking
cigarettes. It's a fire hazard.
255
00:11:10,680 --> 00:11:12,840
Don't worry.
They're not smoking cigarettes.
256
00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:14,120
How long do we have to stay?
257
00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:16,440
As long as it takes to get
a signed recording contract.
258
00:11:16,440 --> 00:11:18,240
Kaboom! Look who just walked in.
259
00:11:18,240 --> 00:11:20,160
Y'all look like
two swagged-up lion tamers.
260
00:11:20,160 --> 00:11:21,800
So, how'd the talk go?
261
00:11:21,800 --> 00:11:23,600
We've discussed it and...
262
00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:26,440
The Bear Maximum is ready
to sign on the dotted line.
263
00:11:26,440 --> 00:11:29,320
Wow, I...don't know what to say.
264
00:11:29,320 --> 00:11:31,360
Just say yes.
265
00:11:31,360 --> 00:11:34,280
Hey. Hey!
266
00:11:34,280 --> 00:11:36,320
Errol, Andy, this is Fresh Keyz.
267
00:11:36,320 --> 00:11:38,360
Fresh is THE hottest producer
right now.
268
00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:40,600
Tell 'em who you just
got out the studio with.
269
00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:42,320
Dizzee. And now he's bonkers!
270
00:11:42,320 --> 00:11:43,440
Nice to meet you, Fresh.
271
00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:46,120
My name's Andy King. I'm the
lead vocalist and song-writer.
272
00:11:46,120 --> 00:11:48,080
Yeah, I'm familiar with your work.
Really?
273
00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:51,240
I caught one of your gigs.
Really liking those lo-fi sounds.
274
00:11:51,240 --> 00:11:54,360
I could...FRESH kiss you right now.
275
00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:57,280
This is the kid I was telling you
about. He's like a mini Mozart.
276
00:11:57,280 --> 00:11:59,480
I hope not. Mozart died
at the age of 35.
277
00:11:59,480 --> 00:12:02,040
MO LAUGHS LOUDLY,
THE OTHERS JOIN IN
278
00:12:02,040 --> 00:12:05,040
Someone's been on Wikipedia too
much.
279
00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:06,880
Beats and brains. I love it.
280
00:12:06,880 --> 00:12:09,600
Rol-dog, let's leave
these sound nerds to it, huh?
281
00:12:09,600 --> 00:12:12,200
Want to check out
the ice-cream bar I had put in?
282
00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:14,160
No can do. He's lactose intolerant.
283
00:12:14,160 --> 00:12:16,360
It's OK, Uncle Andy.
I'm sure they'll have sorbet.
284
00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:19,880
Man, you have got to tell him
before it gets embarrassing.
285
00:12:19,880 --> 00:12:23,200
What are your views
on digital versus analogue?
286
00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:26,600
Well, digital's very cool right now,
but analogue...
287
00:12:26,600 --> 00:12:27,920
Sex on the beach?
288
00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:30,280
Whoa, don't mind if I do.
289
00:12:30,280 --> 00:12:32,160
HE LAUGHS AWKWARDLY
290
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:35,720
I'll be right back! No, it...
291
00:12:35,720 --> 00:12:37,280
Welcome to the VIP room.
292
00:12:37,280 --> 00:12:39,400
Your coconut, sir. Thank you.
293
00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:40,600
These are the hit makers.
294
00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:45,520
I invited guys from MTV, XFM,
Radio 1, Radio 2, even Radio 4.
295
00:12:45,520 --> 00:12:47,560
They begged.
They're all here for you.
296
00:12:47,560 --> 00:12:50,840
You're my King Kong. I discovered
you and now I'm bringing you home.
297
00:12:50,840 --> 00:12:52,880
Didn't King Kong die at the end?
298
00:12:52,880 --> 00:12:56,240
But he climbed the Empire State
Building first. Hey, look.
299
00:12:57,640 --> 00:12:59,200
We even made T-shirts.
300
00:12:59,200 --> 00:13:00,840
Guys, listen up.
301
00:13:00,840 --> 00:13:03,280
I haven't been this excited
about a new act
302
00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:05,520
since I caught a flash
of Florence's "machine".
303
00:13:05,520 --> 00:13:06,720
LAUGHTER
304
00:13:06,720 --> 00:13:09,440
Forget Bieber, forget Kanye.
I give you...
305
00:13:09,440 --> 00:13:10,760
Errol!
306
00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:12,640
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
307
00:13:12,640 --> 00:13:14,760
Shelly, wait! Did you follow me
here?
308
00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:19,080
No. Actually, me and Errol were
personally invited here by Mo Khan.
309
00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:22,040
Yeah, right. You can't come up with
a better lie than that?
310
00:13:22,040 --> 00:13:24,040
No, it's true.
I think he's going to sign us.
311
00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:25,600
Well, good for you.
312
00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:27,680
You deserve it
for being such a great guy(!)
313
00:13:27,680 --> 00:13:32,760
Shelly, what are you doing here?
Since when were you a waitress?
314
00:13:32,760 --> 00:13:35,480
Since a friend told me there was a
catering spot at a Rage party.
315
00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:37,080
And because, if you'd spent
316
00:13:37,080 --> 00:13:39,200
one second listening
while we were together,
317
00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:40,920
you'd have heard me
talk about MY dreams
318
00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:43,480
of becoming a signed recording
artist. Oh, mini pizzas.
319
00:13:44,760 --> 00:13:47,680
Shelly, wait! I can help.
Let me introduce you to Fresh Keyz.
320
00:13:47,680 --> 00:13:49,200
He's this hotshot producer.
321
00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:52,800
Oh, my God. You'd do that for me?
That's so sweet.
322
00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:55,760
I mean, I'm sure you won't expect
anything in return,
323
00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:58,000
like pathetic make-up sex,
now, would you?
324
00:13:58,000 --> 00:14:01,640
I was thinking more "hot and
steamy", but I'll take "pathetic".
325
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:07,040
ANDY'S PHONE RINGS
326
00:14:07,040 --> 00:14:09,840
You're making this tough-love thing
really hard.
327
00:14:09,840 --> 00:14:11,880
I know. I'm sorry.
I'm having Roly withdrawals.
328
00:14:11,880 --> 00:14:14,080
Can you put him on, please?
I need to hear his voice.
329
00:14:14,080 --> 00:14:15,800
What's that drumming?
330
00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:17,760
It's supposed to guide me to
my special tree,
331
00:14:17,760 --> 00:14:20,400
but it's doing my head in. Where are
you? It sounds like a party.
332
00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:22,040
Er, no. That's just
my surround sound.
333
00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:26,080
Watching The Hangover. Vegas, baby!
334
00:14:26,080 --> 00:14:30,000
Errol's brushing his teeth right
now, he can't talk now. Bye. Andy?
335
00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:31,480
Oh, there you are.
336
00:14:31,480 --> 00:14:33,800
What kind of amp do you use?
337
00:14:33,800 --> 00:14:35,960
I'm guessing you're a vox man,
right?
338
00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:39,920
Erm, yeah. No, em...Marshall.
Have you seen Errol?
339
00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:41,720
I'm sure Mo's taking good
care of him.
340
00:14:41,720 --> 00:14:44,360
You could trust him with the royal
baby.
341
00:14:44,360 --> 00:14:45,520
What's going on in there?
342
00:14:45,520 --> 00:14:47,640
Oh, just boring stuff.
343
00:14:47,640 --> 00:14:49,320
You can't go in there.
344
00:14:49,320 --> 00:14:51,160
It's VIP only.
345
00:14:51,160 --> 00:14:52,920
If Errol's a VIP, I'm V-VIP.
346
00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:57,080
Seriously. I can't let you in there.
He'll kill me.
347
00:14:57,080 --> 00:14:59,640
Fresh. What the fuck's going on?
348
00:14:59,640 --> 00:15:01,360
Look...
349
00:15:01,360 --> 00:15:04,400
..my name's not Fresh.
It's Norman.
350
00:15:04,400 --> 00:15:05,680
I'm an intern.
351
00:15:05,680 --> 00:15:07,400
Mo asked me to keep you occupied.
352
00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:10,280
Occupied from what, Norman?
353
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:11,880
Who wants to hear what the
kid can do?!
354
00:15:11,880 --> 00:15:13,320
CHEERING
355
00:15:13,320 --> 00:15:14,440
What's going on here?
356
00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:16,160
I'm sorry, Mo. I tried to stop him!
357
00:15:16,160 --> 00:15:17,400
You're fired.
358
00:15:17,400 --> 00:15:19,440
Dude, you were going to find out
sooner or later.
359
00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:21,000
I'm not signing you.
360
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,040
Fine. Come on, Errol.
361
00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:26,480
No. I'm not signing you.
I am signing him.
362
00:15:29,640 --> 00:15:32,640
That's crazy, right? Errol?
That's crazy, yeah?
363
00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:36,040
Sorry. I just can't sell this drunk
Elvis thing you've got going on.
364
00:15:37,320 --> 00:15:38,520
But everyone loves Elvis.
365
00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:41,840
Young, cool Elvis. Not peanut butter
sandwich, dead on the toilet Elvis.
366
00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:44,320
You're not current
and you're definitely not cool.
367
00:15:50,360 --> 00:15:51,400
Uncle Andy, wait!
368
00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:54,160
You knew the whole time, didn't you?
369
00:15:54,160 --> 00:15:55,200
I wanted to tell you.
370
00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:58,680
It's just with all the money,
I can buy you a record label.
371
00:15:58,680 --> 00:16:00,560
And with Mum and Dad,
I can fix everything.
372
00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:02,440
I just want everyone to be happy.
373
00:16:03,920 --> 00:16:05,120
I hope you're happy now.
374
00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:20,520
Um, this is a song I wrote
called Silent Killer
375
00:16:20,520 --> 00:16:22,000
Already sounds like a hit!
376
00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:24,000
LAUGHTER
377
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,800
# Now we've all been told,
Don't mix raw meat with your veg.
378
00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:28,640
# Wash your bits, pits and teeth
379
00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:30,520
# And your hands on the reg
380
00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:33,400
# Wipe down all surfaces after
the slaughter
381
00:16:33,400 --> 00:16:37,640
# And rinse your cutting boards
with warm soapy water
382
00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:40,040
# Now you might ask,
What's a little blood splatter?
383
00:16:40,040 --> 00:16:44,240
# Well, Health and Safety
is no laughing matter
384
00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:48,720
# Unless you want Salmonella E coli,
Listeria and pink eye... #
385
00:16:48,720 --> 00:16:50,440
Shelly, you like my music right?
386
00:16:50,440 --> 00:16:51,600
Not now, Andy.
387
00:16:51,600 --> 00:16:55,320
No go on it's important. Please.
You'd buy my album right?
388
00:16:55,320 --> 00:16:58,600
Honestly? It's not really my thing.
389
00:16:58,600 --> 00:17:00,240
But I wouldn't throw it away.
390
00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:03,000
I mean my nan's got me every
Susan Boyle album
391
00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:04,920
and I've kept them all.
392
00:17:04,920 --> 00:17:06,440
Great.
393
00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:10,280
I'm, fucking, Su-Bo.
394
00:17:10,280 --> 00:17:12,080
# Sushi grade tune is the only
kind of raw fish
395
00:17:12,080 --> 00:17:13,640
# Anyone should ever try to have in
a raw dish
396
00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:15,160
# Otherwise louses rip off your
tongue,
397
00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:16,720
# While nematodes go swimming round
in your lung
398
00:17:16,720 --> 00:17:18,400
# Toxoplasmosis - you're a zombie
slave to cats
399
00:17:18,400 --> 00:17:20,200
# And bubonic plague
that's what you catch from rats
400
00:17:20,200 --> 00:17:21,960
# And evil chickens
they're the worst of the bunch,
401
00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:24,960
# Plotting and planning on how to
spoil your lunch
402
00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:28,960
# So don't accept meat from
a dodgy looking fella
403
00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:35,160
# Better yet, don't eat,
so you won't get salmonella. #
404
00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:40,640
FEEDBACK
405
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:45,360
Errol, everyone! Wasn't that great?
406
00:17:45,360 --> 00:17:46,560
Smells like a number one.
407
00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:49,720
More like a number two.
What the hell was that?!
408
00:17:49,720 --> 00:17:51,640
I heard someone clapping.
That was Radio 4!
409
00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:54,120
Don't you know any Bieber?
You said I could do my own songs?
410
00:17:54,120 --> 00:17:56,400
Yeah, if they were about kissing
girls and sexting,
411
00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:57,440
not kitchen hygiene!
412
00:17:57,440 --> 00:17:59,600
Now play something cool.
Kitchen hygiene is cool.
413
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:01,400
Not if you want to go platinum.
414
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:04,360
Now, are you going to play
something else or what?
415
00:18:04,360 --> 00:18:05,840
I don't want to go platinum.
416
00:18:05,840 --> 00:18:07,280
I want to go to the planetarium.
417
00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:12,240
Errol!
418
00:18:12,240 --> 00:18:13,800
Rol-dog!
419
00:18:13,800 --> 00:18:17,000
I'm current.
Everything moves in cycles.
420
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:20,360
Bieber's just the new David Cassidy.
421
00:18:20,360 --> 00:18:23,160
Oh, you don't even fucking know
who David Cassidy is.
422
00:18:23,160 --> 00:18:27,120
Partridge family. '70-'74.
Best TV band.
423
00:18:27,120 --> 00:18:29,680
Aside from The Monkeys.
Obviously.
424
00:18:29,680 --> 00:18:32,040
BOTH: Davey Jones.
Yeah, he was the shit.
425
00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:33,280
This is all my fault.
426
00:18:33,280 --> 00:18:37,240
I was the one who checked out
your demo and recommended it to Mo.
427
00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:39,560
I tried telling him
that you guys were a good package,
428
00:18:39,560 --> 00:18:41,680
but he was only
interested in the kid.
429
00:18:43,240 --> 00:18:45,320
You recommended our demo?
430
00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:47,640
Yeah. I thought it was solid.
431
00:18:47,640 --> 00:18:48,760
I'd buy your album.
432
00:18:52,640 --> 00:18:53,680
Hi, Mum.
433
00:18:53,680 --> 00:18:55,640
Have you brushing your teeth
that whole time.
434
00:18:55,640 --> 00:18:59,480
I keep telling you, two minutes is
enough. Mum, what makes you happy?
435
00:18:59,480 --> 00:19:02,200
New shoes and a comfortable bra.
436
00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:04,640
I'm joking. You make me happy.
437
00:19:04,640 --> 00:19:05,800
Me? Why?
438
00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:08,600
Because you alphabetise all my
books,
439
00:19:08,600 --> 00:19:12,000
and you tell me if I'm wearing too
much make-up,
440
00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:15,640
and you write the funniest
birthday cards,
441
00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:19,640
plus you're really good at picking a
ripe avocado,
442
00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:22,880
and you help me finish crosswords
I have no business finishing.
443
00:19:24,160 --> 00:19:25,880
And because...
444
00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:31,640
..you are the only thing
in this world I know I got right.
445
00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:36,040
Night, Mum.
Night, sweetheart.
446
00:19:58,640 --> 00:19:59,960
That's it, then.
447
00:19:59,960 --> 00:20:03,080
I'm just going to work in
Carpet Brothers and slowly die.
448
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:06,360
No, man. You're a musician.
449
00:20:06,360 --> 00:20:08,040
People need to hear your music.
450
00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:11,680
So, what you're saying is,
I'm not Carpet Brothers material.
451
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:14,360
Hey, man. Have you seen Errol?
452
00:20:14,360 --> 00:20:17,320
Yeah, he's about this tall
with no sense of loyalty.
453
00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:20,840
No, seriously. He ran out on me and
I've been looking for him
454
00:20:20,840 --> 00:20:22,080
for like half an hour.
455
00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:23,480
Then who's watching him?
456
00:20:23,480 --> 00:20:26,600
Mo, you have come with me.
This kid's being hilarious.
457
00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:34,880
Errol, what are you doing?
458
00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:37,840
Oh, hi, Uncle Andy.
I've invented a new dance style.
459
00:20:41,320 --> 00:20:42,400
Andy, what's going on?
460
00:20:42,400 --> 00:20:45,360
Errol, get off the floor
you're going to get dirty.
461
00:20:45,360 --> 00:20:47,640
Who cares about a few germs,
we're all germs really
462
00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:48,880
if you think about it.
463
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:51,760
Your face looks like a Furby.
464
00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:56,560
If I didn't know any better I'd
say he's completely...
465
00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:57,600
Off his tits, yeah.
466
00:20:57,600 --> 00:21:00,760
Errol, darling, has anyone given you
anything to drink or eat?
467
00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:02,880
Only breath mints from Mo's desk.
468
00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:04,840
Didn't taste very nice though.
469
00:21:04,840 --> 00:21:06,320
I keep my E in a mint tin.
470
00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:07,360
What?!
471
00:21:07,360 --> 00:21:09,920
Yeah. Your nephew's tripping
balls on Ecstasy.
472
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:11,840
Errol, how many mints did you have?
473
00:21:11,840 --> 00:21:13,760
One, two, three, infinity.
474
00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:15,800
Want to watch me move through the
Higgs field?
475
00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:18,280
Higgs Bos-on!
Higgs Bos-off!
476
00:21:18,280 --> 00:21:20,920
Damn! Kid's going to be
a legend after this.
477
00:21:23,640 --> 00:21:24,960
What the hell man!?
478
00:21:24,960 --> 00:21:26,760
You were supposed to be
looking after him!
479
00:21:26,760 --> 00:21:27,880
He's not my kid!
480
00:21:27,880 --> 00:21:29,720
What do we do?
481
00:21:29,720 --> 00:21:30,760
HE RETCHES
482
00:21:30,760 --> 00:21:34,200
MUSIC: "The Only Living Boy In
New York" by Simon & Garfunkel
483
00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:42,480
# I know your part will go fine
484
00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:49,360
# Fly down to Mexico
485
00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:53,520
# Da-du-da-du-da-du-da
486
00:21:53,520 --> 00:21:55,160
# And here I am
487
00:21:56,720 --> 00:21:59,080
# The only living boy in New York
488
00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:05,600
# I get the news
489
00:22:05,600 --> 00:22:08,400
# I need on the weather report... #
490
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:11,280
Thanks.
491
00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:17,120
Any news?
492
00:22:17,120 --> 00:22:19,720
He's in recovery now. The nurses
says he's going to be fine.
493
00:22:20,760 --> 00:22:23,400
We can go and see him
in a little while.
494
00:22:23,400 --> 00:22:25,800
This is going to blow
the custody case.
495
00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:28,160
This happened on my time, Andy.
My watch.
496
00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:30,040
I trusted you to take care of him.
497
00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:32,080
I know. I'm sorry.
498
00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:37,440
I'll do whatever it takes to make
this better, I promise. How?!
499
00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:40,640
It wasn't my fault.
500
00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:42,760
Who keeps their drugs in a mint tin?
501
00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:44,760
Who takes a 12-year-old to
a party with drugs!?
502
00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:49,520
I can explain.
503
00:22:49,520 --> 00:22:51,200
Ben, wait!
504
00:22:51,200 --> 00:22:53,680
Excuse me.
The family can come through now.
505
00:22:56,720 --> 00:22:59,600
No, not you. You're not going
anywhere near my son.
506
00:23:01,120 --> 00:23:02,200
Sam?
507
00:23:02,200 --> 00:23:03,320
Just go home, Andy.
508
00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:06,680
Shelly...
509
00:23:08,080 --> 00:23:09,520
..where are you going?
510
00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:11,640
Home.
You could stay?
511
00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:13,160
I never thought I'd say this,
512
00:23:13,160 --> 00:23:14,360
but I think out of everyone
513
00:23:14,360 --> 00:23:16,120
you probably hate me the least
right now.
514
00:23:16,120 --> 00:23:19,080
Andy, I'm used to being the crazy
one in a relationship,
515
00:23:19,080 --> 00:23:21,800
but you, you just blow me out the
water.
516
00:23:24,200 --> 00:23:26,360
But it wasn't my fault.
517
00:23:26,360 --> 00:23:27,720
It was a little bit your fault.
518
00:23:58,920 --> 00:23:59,960
PHONE RINGS
519
00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:09,360
Hey. How are you feeling?
520
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:14,080
Good. No lasting brain damage.
But I'm still keeping an eye on it.
521
00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:15,320
Are you back at school yet?
522
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:17,240
Yeah. They made me
a gluten free cake.
523
00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:19,680
Is everyone this nice
when you have an overdose?
524
00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:21,120
I wish.
525
00:24:21,120 --> 00:24:22,680
Do you know of the verdict yet?
526
00:24:22,680 --> 00:24:24,040
No. Your mum said three.
527
00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:27,000
When can I come over
and play video games?
528
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:28,040
Mr King?
529
00:24:29,920 --> 00:24:31,240
Look, I've got to go. Bye.
530
00:24:37,720 --> 00:24:39,440
Would you say you
work well with others?
531
00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:40,720
Definitely. People love me.
532
00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:43,240
At school I was voted most likely
to start a cult.
533
00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:45,240
What would you say is like the
toughest choice
534
00:24:45,240 --> 00:24:46,320
you've ever had to make?
535
00:24:46,320 --> 00:24:48,600
Whopper or Big Mac.
I still can't decide.
536
00:24:48,600 --> 00:24:51,040
One of them flame grilled,
the other one's a double patty.
537
00:24:51,040 --> 00:24:52,960
It's like Sophie's Choice in a way,
isn't it?
538
00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:55,560
You've been working as a babysitter.
How did that come about?
539
00:24:55,560 --> 00:24:57,480
I got that gig through
a family connection.
540
00:24:57,480 --> 00:25:00,600
I can't handle kids, personally.
Don't have the patience for them.
541
00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:01,720
I know what you mean.
542
00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:04,160
It's weird, one minute you want to
throw them in the river
543
00:25:04,160 --> 00:25:07,480
tied to a bag of rocks, the next
minute you find yourself...
544
00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:14,200
..doing the most ridiculous things
in order to make them happy.
545
00:25:17,200 --> 00:25:18,480
Excuse me.
546
00:25:27,840 --> 00:25:29,840
Objection!
547
00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:30,960
Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
548
00:25:30,960 --> 00:25:32,360
We're in the middle of a
hearing.
549
00:25:32,360 --> 00:25:34,600
Your honour, that's my sister
sitting right there.
550
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:38,200
And she doesn't deserve to have her
boy taken away because of me.
551
00:25:38,200 --> 00:25:39,400
I'm the fuck up.
552
00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:41,880
I'm a 31-year-old nobody
musician
553
00:25:41,880 --> 00:25:46,160
who can't
hold down a job or a relationship.
554
00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:49,760
I lie for fun,
I hurt everyone I care about.
555
00:25:49,760 --> 00:25:52,640
I've used a sock as toilet paper...
556
00:25:52,640 --> 00:25:54,720
on more than one occasion.
557
00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:56,240
I'm a shabby battering ram
558
00:25:56,240 --> 00:25:58,280
and it's my fault Errol ended
up in hospital.
559
00:25:58,280 --> 00:26:00,720
It was my fault and my fault alone.
560
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:03,280
Don't punish Sam cos of my mistakes.
561
00:26:03,280 --> 00:26:05,680
She's a great mum
and he's a great kid.
562
00:26:05,680 --> 00:26:07,440
He's taught me how to de-scale
a kettle,
563
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:09,520
the correct way to fold T-shirts.
564
00:26:09,520 --> 00:26:12,680
He's just taught me the meaning of
"homo erectus"
565
00:26:12,680 --> 00:26:15,400
and it's not what you
think it is.
566
00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:17,520
I swear I won't go near that
kid again.
567
00:26:19,120 --> 00:26:21,120
Just don't ruin his childhood
because of me.
568
00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:24,680
He was just starting to get normal.
569
00:26:27,400 --> 00:26:28,840
Um. The defence rests.
570
00:26:32,600 --> 00:26:33,640
Andy, wait!
571
00:26:35,600 --> 00:26:38,040
I'm sorry. That was a bad idea.
572
00:26:38,040 --> 00:26:40,160
I think I've just made things
a lot worse.
573
00:27:07,200 --> 00:27:08,240
DOORBELL RINGS
574
00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:14,880
Roly? What are you doing here?
575
00:27:14,880 --> 00:27:16,640
You wouldn't return my calls.
576
00:27:16,640 --> 00:27:19,880
Sorry, mate. The restraining
order... Doesn't say anything about
calling.
577
00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:21,840
Seriously, you should go.
I mean, 200 metres.
578
00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:23,560
We're already breaking the law
as it is.
579
00:27:23,560 --> 00:27:25,320
Since when do you
care about the law?
580
00:27:25,320 --> 00:27:26,520
I'm taking the bus home now,
581
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:30,720
so if you factor in traffic,
road works, delays,
582
00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:32,760
that could easily give us an hour.
583
00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:33,920
An hour for what?
584
00:27:35,200 --> 00:27:38,000
So...how are you doing?
585
00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:41,280
Yeah. Shared custody isn't that bad,
really.
586
00:27:41,280 --> 00:27:42,920
Mum and Dad are in better
moods now.
587
00:27:44,440 --> 00:27:45,880
Oh, I made a new schedule.
588
00:27:47,240 --> 00:27:48,360
Oh, yeah.
589
00:27:51,240 --> 00:27:52,480
It's good seeing you.
590
00:27:53,880 --> 00:27:54,920
Yeah.
591
00:27:56,880 --> 00:27:58,040
Whatever.
45990
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