Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:30,431 --> 00:00:33,431
Captioning made possible by
the U.S. Department of education
2
00:00:56,064 --> 00:00:57,198
hey.
3
00:00:57,198 --> 00:00:58,331
Hey, sis.
4
00:00:58,331 --> 00:00:59,664
You going somewhere?
5
00:00:59,664 --> 00:01:02,664
No. I spent the weekend
at cockroach's house.
6
00:01:02,664 --> 00:01:05,231
You didn't even notice
I was gone.
7
00:01:05,231 --> 00:01:06,298
No.
8
00:01:06,298 --> 00:01:07,631
But welcome home.
9
00:01:07,631 --> 00:01:09,764
Come see something
in my room.
10
00:01:09,764 --> 00:01:11,564
I hate going in there.
11
00:01:11,564 --> 00:01:13,031
I cleaned it up.
12
00:01:15,498 --> 00:01:17,164
It does look better.
13
00:01:17,164 --> 00:01:19,231
What's up?
14
00:01:19,231 --> 00:01:20,664
This.
15
00:01:20,664 --> 00:01:22,331
Theo, an earring!
16
00:01:22,331 --> 00:01:23,564
Shh!
17
00:01:25,164 --> 00:01:27,831
I had it done
Friday after school.
18
00:01:27,831 --> 00:01:29,864
That's great!
It looks fantastic!
19
00:01:29,864 --> 00:01:33,798
It says I'm old enough
to make my own decisions.
20
00:01:33,798 --> 00:01:35,398
Your ear looks red.
21
00:01:35,398 --> 00:01:38,631
If I want to put
an earring in my ear
22
00:01:38,631 --> 00:01:39,898
that's my business.
23
00:01:39,898 --> 00:01:41,164
It looks puffy.
24
00:01:41,164 --> 00:01:42,864
When people see this
25
00:01:42,864 --> 00:01:45,698
they'll know they're
dealing with a man!
26
00:01:45,698 --> 00:01:47,864
Let Dad look at it.
27
00:01:47,864 --> 00:01:49,331
Let who?
28
00:01:49,331 --> 00:01:50,531
Ooo!
29
00:01:50,531 --> 00:01:52,098
I think
it's infected.
30
00:01:52,098 --> 00:01:53,264
It is?
31
00:01:53,264 --> 00:01:54,764
Where was it done?
32
00:01:54,764 --> 00:01:56,364
In Cockroach's garage.
33
00:01:56,364 --> 00:01:59,298
You let cockroach
Pierce your ear?
34
00:01:59,298 --> 00:02:00,931
I'm not crazy.
35
00:02:00,931 --> 00:02:03,498
It was his sister,
tootsie.
36
00:02:03,498 --> 00:02:05,098
Tootsie's in junior high school.
37
00:02:05,098 --> 00:02:07,631
She does this on the side
38
00:02:07,631 --> 00:02:10,198
and she only charges 99 cents.
39
00:02:10,198 --> 00:02:13,364
If dad doesn't look at it,
it will get worse.
40
00:02:13,364 --> 00:02:15,364
This is just an ear.
41
00:02:15,364 --> 00:02:18,664
If dad finds out,
my whole body's in danger.
42
00:02:18,664 --> 00:02:21,664
I didn't say you
could come in here.
43
00:02:21,664 --> 00:02:23,231
I don't want to.
44
00:02:23,231 --> 00:02:25,231
What are you doing here?
45
00:02:25,231 --> 00:02:26,498
Denise is here.
46
00:02:26,498 --> 00:02:27,398
So?
47
00:02:27,398 --> 00:02:30,398
If you are in Theo's room
48
00:02:30,398 --> 00:02:31,664
something is up.
49
00:02:31,664 --> 00:02:33,631
Nothing's up, Vanessa.
50
00:02:33,631 --> 00:02:36,631
Okay, but you know
I'll find out anyway.
51
00:02:36,631 --> 00:02:38,631
I have my ways.
52
00:03:16,498 --> 00:03:17,498
Cliff!
53
00:03:17,498 --> 00:03:18,498
Yo!
54
00:03:27,531 --> 00:03:29,364
Just having a little taste.
55
00:03:29,364 --> 00:03:31,731
This pie is for your parents.
56
00:03:31,731 --> 00:03:33,131
My folks won't notice.
57
00:03:33,131 --> 00:03:34,464
They did last time.
58
00:03:34,464 --> 00:03:35,231
How?
59
00:03:35,231 --> 00:03:37,231
When we cut into it
60
00:03:37,231 --> 00:03:38,431
it was hollow.
61
00:03:38,431 --> 00:03:41,098
My folks aren't
coming here to eat.
62
00:03:41,098 --> 00:03:43,431
They're coming
to spoil the children.
63
00:03:43,431 --> 00:03:46,231
What do you expect?
They're grandparents.
64
00:03:46,231 --> 00:03:47,564
Right. Grandparents.
65
00:03:47,564 --> 00:03:51,564
These are not the same
people I grew up with.
66
00:03:51,564 --> 00:03:55,064
They're the biggest
hypocrites you've ever seen.
67
00:03:55,064 --> 00:03:58,564
My father comes in,
goes into his pocket
68
00:03:58,564 --> 00:04:01,064
pulls out
a handful of money.
69
00:04:01,064 --> 00:04:04,231
"Let's see if
granddad has any money
70
00:04:04,231 --> 00:04:06,264
for these
wonderful children."
71
00:04:07,564 --> 00:04:10,064
This is the same man...
72
00:04:10,064 --> 00:04:14,331
when I was his child,
I would ask him for fifty cents.
73
00:04:14,331 --> 00:04:17,331
The man would tell me
his life story.
74
00:04:17,331 --> 00:04:20,664
This man would tell me
how at age five
75
00:04:20,664 --> 00:04:22,898
he woke up 4:00 every morning.
76
00:04:22,898 --> 00:04:26,064
Had no alarm clock,
had no rooster
77
00:04:26,064 --> 00:04:28,731
just a sense of responsibility.
78
00:04:28,731 --> 00:04:30,164
No, my
father
79
00:04:30,164 --> 00:04:34,564
found a job milking 12O cows.
80
00:04:34,564 --> 00:04:38,831
The man he worked for
had no bucket.
81
00:04:38,831 --> 00:04:44,164
So he had to squirt the milk
into his hand
82
00:04:44,164 --> 00:04:46,564
walk eight miles...
83
00:04:47,898 --> 00:04:50,398
through snow up to here...
84
00:04:53,064 --> 00:04:56,531
and my mother
is the same way, too.
85
00:04:56,531 --> 00:04:59,331
She's one of
the sweetest people I know.
86
00:04:59,331 --> 00:05:01,664
I didn't say she wasn't sweet
87
00:05:01,664 --> 00:05:05,731
but this woman
comes over here to the house
88
00:05:05,731 --> 00:05:07,064
kisses every child--
89
00:05:07,064 --> 00:05:09,731
"Just come in
and kiss your grandmother.
90
00:05:09,731 --> 00:05:12,064
"You're the most
beautiful children
91
00:05:12,064 --> 00:05:14,998
on the face of this earth."
92
00:05:14,998 --> 00:05:17,664
But when I
was her child
93
00:05:17,664 --> 00:05:22,731
all this woman ever wanted to do
was take a stick
94
00:05:22,731 --> 00:05:26,564
and ask god
to give her enough strength
95
00:05:26,564 --> 00:05:29,564
so she could knock us somewhere.
96
00:05:29,564 --> 00:05:31,231
To this day
97
00:05:31,231 --> 00:05:35,231
I still don't know
where "Kingdom come" is.
98
00:05:35,231 --> 00:05:39,064
All she is,
as far as I'm concerned
99
00:05:39,064 --> 00:05:43,531
is an old person
trying to get into heaven now.
100
00:05:44,831 --> 00:05:46,698
Daddy.
101
00:05:46,698 --> 00:05:47,431
Yeah, dear?
102
00:05:47,431 --> 00:05:49,098
What would you do
103
00:05:49,098 --> 00:05:52,064
if someone you loved
swore you to secrecy
104
00:05:52,064 --> 00:05:53,898
but keeping that secret
105
00:05:53,898 --> 00:05:56,598
might not be good
for that person?
106
00:05:56,598 --> 00:06:00,098
Is the person
sworn to secrecy
in this family?
107
00:06:01,564 --> 00:06:03,164
Yeah.
108
00:06:03,164 --> 00:06:06,298
Is the secrecy juicy?
109
00:06:07,298 --> 00:06:09,898
Yeah.
110
00:06:09,898 --> 00:06:10,131
Tell it.
111
00:06:11,598 --> 00:06:12,964
If I tell you
112
00:06:12,964 --> 00:06:14,998
this person
will hate me forever.
113
00:06:14,998 --> 00:06:16,798
You have to,
for their own good.
114
00:06:16,798 --> 00:06:18,631
I'll give you a clue.
115
00:06:18,631 --> 00:06:21,598
That way, you'll figure it out
for yourselves.
116
00:06:21,598 --> 00:06:22,298
A clue?
117
00:06:22,298 --> 00:06:23,631
Earlobes.
118
00:06:29,764 --> 00:06:31,931
Earlobes!
119
00:06:31,931 --> 00:06:32,664
What about earlobes?
120
00:06:32,664 --> 00:06:34,298
All I'm saying is
121
00:06:34,298 --> 00:06:42,464
does everybody in This house
have two healthy earlobes?
122
00:06:47,831 --> 00:06:49,398
( knocking )
123
00:06:49,398 --> 00:06:51,664
Who is it?
124
00:06:51,664 --> 00:06:52,598
Dad.
125
00:06:52,598 --> 00:06:53,964
Hold on.
126
00:06:59,498 --> 00:07:00,931
Okay, come in.
127
00:07:03,598 --> 00:07:04,764
What's happening, dad?
128
00:07:13,831 --> 00:07:16,698
⪠Never gonna clean it up âª
129
00:07:18,931 --> 00:07:20,898
⪠no matter how messy it gets âª
130
00:07:20,898 --> 00:07:23,798
⪠you're never
gonna clean it up âª
131
00:07:32,064 --> 00:07:33,231
son?
132
00:07:33,231 --> 00:07:34,031
Yeah, dad?
133
00:07:35,764 --> 00:07:39,464
There's no music
coming through the headset.
134
00:07:39,464 --> 00:07:42,898
You still bopping to
what's left in your brain?
135
00:07:42,898 --> 00:07:44,931
No.
136
00:07:44,931 --> 00:07:46,398
Take the headset off.
137
00:07:46,398 --> 00:07:47,398
Now?
138
00:07:47,398 --> 00:07:48,731
Is there any reason
139
00:07:48,731 --> 00:07:50,731
why you shouldn't
take them off?
140
00:07:50,731 --> 00:07:51,664
No.
141
00:07:51,664 --> 00:07:52,964
Okay.
142
00:08:09,698 --> 00:08:12,031
Guys sure can
get up, huh?
143
00:08:12,031 --> 00:08:13,364
Yeah.
144
00:09:17,098 --> 00:09:19,331
Denise told you, right?
145
00:09:19,331 --> 00:09:21,764
Told me what?
146
00:09:21,764 --> 00:09:23,764
About this.
147
00:09:23,764 --> 00:09:25,764
Is that a decal?
148
00:09:26,764 --> 00:09:27,998
No.
149
00:09:27,998 --> 00:09:31,864
Have you been tagged
by the wildlife society?
150
00:09:32,864 --> 00:09:34,064
It's an earring.
151
00:09:34,064 --> 00:09:36,164
There's a hole through my ear.
152
00:09:36,164 --> 00:09:38,364
Denise says
it might be infected.
153
00:09:44,498 --> 00:09:46,264
Well, she's right.
154
00:09:46,264 --> 00:09:48,498
It is infected.
155
00:09:48,498 --> 00:09:50,898
Come on.
156
00:09:50,898 --> 00:09:52,831
What are you
going to do to me?
157
00:09:52,831 --> 00:09:54,664
I am going to
fix your ear.
158
00:09:54,664 --> 00:09:56,264
Then what?
159
00:09:56,264 --> 00:09:58,631
You expecting
some sort of punishment?
160
00:09:58,631 --> 00:09:59,598
Shouldn't I?
161
00:09:59,598 --> 00:10:01,298
Yeah.
162
00:10:09,231 --> 00:10:10,698
Ow!
163
00:10:10,698 --> 00:10:13,031
Can't we do this
someplace else?
164
00:10:13,031 --> 00:10:14,264
Why?
165
00:10:14,264 --> 00:10:18,098
Because this place
is for pregnant women.
166
00:10:18,098 --> 00:10:20,998
I have four daughters
and a son
167
00:10:20,998 --> 00:10:22,831
and somehow I thought
168
00:10:22,831 --> 00:10:26,164
you would be the one
without the earring.
169
00:10:29,498 --> 00:10:31,598
Why did you do it?
170
00:10:31,598 --> 00:10:33,098
To kids today
171
00:10:33,098 --> 00:10:35,931
It's sort of
a sign of independence.
172
00:10:35,931 --> 00:10:37,564
Who's the girl?
173
00:10:37,564 --> 00:10:38,331
Huh?
174
00:10:38,331 --> 00:10:41,831
Who's the girl?
175
00:10:41,831 --> 00:10:43,898
Eunice Baker.
176
00:10:43,898 --> 00:10:44,531
You love her?
177
00:10:44,531 --> 00:10:45,664
I like her.
178
00:10:45,664 --> 00:10:48,464
She said I'd look good
with an earring.
179
00:10:48,464 --> 00:10:53,731
And so now you could wind up
with half a head
180
00:10:53,731 --> 00:10:56,098
because of
the infection.
181
00:10:56,098 --> 00:10:57,698
That's all right, son
182
00:10:57,698 --> 00:11:00,698
because what I have
in store for you
183
00:11:00,698 --> 00:11:04,364
is going to be just wonderful.
184
00:11:04,364 --> 00:11:06,898
What's that?
185
00:11:06,898 --> 00:11:09,231
I imagine
he should be here for dinner
186
00:11:09,231 --> 00:11:11,331
in another five minutes.
187
00:11:11,331 --> 00:11:12,498
Not grandpa.
188
00:11:12,498 --> 00:11:13,664
Oh, yes.
189
00:11:13,664 --> 00:11:14,931
Oh, yes.
190
00:11:14,931 --> 00:11:19,264
And grandpa is going to love
to hear about this
191
00:11:19,264 --> 00:11:23,098
because your grandfather is like
the national enquirer--
192
00:11:23,098 --> 00:11:26,864
he loves to hear
the untold story.
193
00:11:26,864 --> 00:11:29,064
Maybe he won't notice.
194
00:11:29,064 --> 00:11:30,431
I've fixed that also,
my boy.
195
00:11:30,431 --> 00:11:32,431
We're going
to make it
196
00:11:32,431 --> 00:11:35,098
so he will see it
really good.
197
00:11:35,098 --> 00:11:37,764
You're not going
to make this easy.
198
00:11:37,764 --> 00:11:41,531
I could have put your
whole head in a sling.
199
00:11:49,764 --> 00:11:54,664
(⪠singing a dirge âª)
200
00:11:54,664 --> 00:11:56,998
There are my boys!
201
00:11:59,364 --> 00:12:02,298
Take your time getting to me.
202
00:12:03,631 --> 00:12:05,131
When I travel on
203
00:12:05,131 --> 00:12:07,431
you'll be sorry
you didn't spend...
204
00:12:07,431 --> 00:12:09,898
more time with
your mother, yes.
205
00:12:09,898 --> 00:12:10,898
Owww!
206
00:12:13,898 --> 00:12:17,431
Are you still delivering
all the babies in Town?
207
00:12:17,431 --> 00:12:18,564
Yep.
208
00:12:18,564 --> 00:12:20,431
Heathcliff.
209
00:12:20,431 --> 00:12:20,664
Yes, ma'am.
210
00:12:21,531 --> 00:12:23,698
How was the trip over?
211
00:12:23,698 --> 00:12:26,631
Fine, until we had to park.
212
00:12:26,631 --> 00:12:30,598
I said I would pay for
parking in the garage.
213
00:12:30,598 --> 00:12:33,831
At $8.50 an hour? No, sir.
214
00:12:33,831 --> 00:12:36,831
I found a large,
perfectly legal spot
215
00:12:36,831 --> 00:12:39,198
less than a mile from here.
216
00:12:39,198 --> 00:12:41,598
By coming in Early
217
00:12:41,598 --> 00:12:44,098
planting himself
at the head of the block
218
00:12:44,098 --> 00:12:47,664
and then waiting
for somebody to pull out.
219
00:12:47,664 --> 00:12:49,664
Where are you
going, son?
220
00:12:49,664 --> 00:12:51,664
Come over here
221
00:12:51,664 --> 00:12:55,631
and say hello
to your granddad.
222
00:12:55,631 --> 00:12:58,064
He didn't say hello
to me, either.
223
00:12:58,064 --> 00:12:59,398
Hi, grandma.
224
00:12:59,398 --> 00:13:00,464
Hi.
225
00:13:02,131 --> 00:13:03,964
Hey, grandpa.
226
00:13:03,964 --> 00:13:06,798
What happened
to your ear?
227
00:13:10,131 --> 00:13:12,731
I walked into a door.
228
00:13:12,731 --> 00:13:15,764
I do that sometimes myself.
229
00:13:15,764 --> 00:13:17,531
Go help mom.
230
00:13:17,531 --> 00:13:19,864
Grandma, do you
want to come?
231
00:13:19,864 --> 00:13:21,064
Sure.
232
00:13:22,064 --> 00:13:23,198
Excuse us.
233
00:13:23,198 --> 00:13:24,564
Excuse us.
234
00:13:26,098 --> 00:13:29,064
What really happened
to your ear, son?
235
00:13:29,064 --> 00:13:31,064
I walked into a door.
236
00:13:31,064 --> 00:13:32,264
Come on.
237
00:13:32,264 --> 00:13:35,731
I heard that old
"Walked into a door" Line
238
00:13:35,731 --> 00:13:39,464
from your dad back in '49.
239
00:13:39,464 --> 00:13:41,431
I got my ear pierced.
240
00:13:41,431 --> 00:13:43,064
On purpose?
241
00:13:44,164 --> 00:13:46,064
Absolutely.
242
00:13:46,064 --> 00:13:50,064
Your grandson was told by a girl
243
00:13:50,064 --> 00:13:54,398
that he would look good
in an earring.
244
00:13:54,398 --> 00:13:58,298
So he went to...
where did you go?
245
00:13:58,298 --> 00:14:01,198
Cockroach's garage.
246
00:14:02,664 --> 00:14:07,798
Cockroach's garage,
and had his ear pierced by...
247
00:14:07,798 --> 00:14:10,831
what is the name of the person?
248
00:14:10,831 --> 00:14:13,098
It was his sister, tootsie.
249
00:14:13,098 --> 00:14:15,964
His sister, tootsie.
250
00:14:17,464 --> 00:14:20,464
Who probably lined him up
against the wall
251
00:14:20,464 --> 00:14:23,331
and threw a javelin at 60 feet.
252
00:14:23,331 --> 00:14:24,831
I get the picture.
253
00:14:24,831 --> 00:14:26,264
All right, then.
254
00:14:26,264 --> 00:14:29,931
I'll just let you
handle the good part.
255
00:14:29,931 --> 00:14:33,398
I won't come down
hard on the boy.
256
00:14:33,398 --> 00:14:34,431
You won't?
257
00:14:34,431 --> 00:14:35,898
No.
258
00:14:35,898 --> 00:14:38,264
Young men in Love
do crazy things.
259
00:14:38,264 --> 00:14:39,498
When your father...
260
00:14:39,498 --> 00:14:40,764
uh, dad...
261
00:14:41,931 --> 00:14:43,431
no, no, no.
262
00:14:43,431 --> 00:14:45,264
It's good for him.
263
00:14:45,264 --> 00:14:46,264
No.
264
00:14:46,264 --> 00:14:49,598
It will make him
feel better.
265
00:14:49,598 --> 00:14:53,064
I'm not interested
in him feeling better, okay?
266
00:14:53,064 --> 00:14:56,131
Sit down.
267
00:15:01,698 --> 00:15:03,198
When your father...
268
00:15:03,198 --> 00:15:04,198
dad...
269
00:15:04,198 --> 00:15:05,698
...was 15
270
00:15:05,698 --> 00:15:08,198
he and his friend,
lex Thompson--
271
00:15:08,198 --> 00:15:11,331
a boy who was left back twice...
272
00:15:12,931 --> 00:15:16,431
decided They would
straighten their own hair
273
00:15:16,431 --> 00:15:17,964
in Lex's cellar.
274
00:15:17,964 --> 00:15:19,764
What?
275
00:15:20,631 --> 00:15:23,231
That's very interesting.
276
00:15:23,231 --> 00:15:24,798
It all started
277
00:15:24,798 --> 00:15:29,131
when he took a pretty young lady
to the old Earl theater
278
00:15:29,131 --> 00:15:33,131
and saw a group called
"The icicles" With breezy brown.
279
00:15:33,131 --> 00:15:35,964
Breezy brown
Had straightened his hair.
280
00:15:35,964 --> 00:15:39,631
Most singers straightened
their hair back then.
281
00:15:39,631 --> 00:15:42,031
Your father's date went wild.
282
00:15:42,031 --> 00:15:43,698
Right then,
he decided
283
00:15:43,698 --> 00:15:45,131
He would lose her
284
00:15:45,131 --> 00:15:48,064
if he didn't
straighten his hair.
285
00:15:50,464 --> 00:15:52,964
You did that for a girl?
286
00:15:52,964 --> 00:15:55,998
One particular girl.
287
00:15:55,998 --> 00:15:59,464
In those days, people used
to straighten their hair with
288
00:15:59,464 --> 00:16:02,198
a solution called conkalene.
289
00:16:02,198 --> 00:16:03,998
It cost money
290
00:16:03,998 --> 00:16:07,031
and your father was flat broke
291
00:16:07,031 --> 00:16:11,698
so he and lex
Mixed up their own solution--
292
00:16:11,698 --> 00:16:16,564
potato peels, corn syrup,
and a touch of nitroglycerin.
293
00:16:18,964 --> 00:16:24,131
This man,
a future doctor
294
00:16:24,131 --> 00:16:27,431
had it poured slowly
295
00:16:27,431 --> 00:16:29,664
over his head.
296
00:16:29,664 --> 00:16:30,864
What happened?
297
00:16:30,864 --> 00:16:33,598
It burned all my hair.
It wasn't that bad.
298
00:16:33,598 --> 00:16:36,964
He shot out of there
like a Bolt
299
00:16:36,964 --> 00:16:38,798
pushed Lex's dog aside
300
00:16:38,798 --> 00:16:42,098
And stuck his head
in the dog's water dish.
301
00:16:42,098 --> 00:16:44,198
You must have liked that girl.
302
00:16:45,431 --> 00:16:47,231
Whatever happened to her?
303
00:16:47,231 --> 00:16:49,698
She's in the kitchen now.
304
00:16:49,698 --> 00:16:53,931
You burned all the hair
off your head for mom?
305
00:16:55,198 --> 00:16:57,131
Oh, my god!
306
00:17:00,198 --> 00:17:02,198
Let him be.
307
00:17:03,331 --> 00:17:05,031
Guess what?
308
00:17:05,031 --> 00:17:07,031
One of these days
309
00:17:07,031 --> 00:17:10,198
you're going to
need some money.
310
00:17:12,198 --> 00:17:15,264
In that case,
would you tell her?
311
00:17:15,264 --> 00:17:17,198
It would be
my pleasure.
312
00:17:17,198 --> 00:17:18,364
Clair?
313
00:17:20,198 --> 00:17:25,464
What is the craziest thing
that a certain young man--
314
00:17:25,464 --> 00:17:30,464
I'm not naming any names--
did to impress you?
315
00:17:30,464 --> 00:17:34,364
You mean When cliff tried
to straighten his hair?
316
00:17:36,231 --> 00:17:38,198
Daddy did that
for you?
317
00:17:38,198 --> 00:17:41,564
He tried,
but it all fell out.
318
00:17:41,564 --> 00:17:44,798
Thank you very much.
319
00:17:45,864 --> 00:17:48,564
You remember that
kind of fondly?
320
00:17:48,564 --> 00:17:49,998
I'll never forget it.
321
00:17:49,998 --> 00:17:53,631
Theo, for the love
of a young lady
322
00:17:53,631 --> 00:17:56,131
has done something
foolish himself.
323
00:17:56,131 --> 00:17:58,364
Promise you
won't get mad.
324
00:17:58,364 --> 00:18:00,398
Okay, I promise.
325
00:18:00,398 --> 00:18:02,064
He pierced his ear.
326
00:18:02,064 --> 00:18:03,364
I'll kill him.
327
00:18:03,364 --> 00:18:04,498
Wait a minute!
328
00:18:04,498 --> 00:18:06,264
He made
a mistake.
329
00:18:06,264 --> 00:18:09,198
He's a lot
like his father.
330
00:18:09,198 --> 00:18:13,198
Many's the time
I've pulled him out of trouble.
331
00:18:13,198 --> 00:18:17,198
But I was patient and
understanding and tolerant...
332
00:18:17,198 --> 00:18:20,531
how could you tell
a story like that?
333
00:18:20,531 --> 00:18:23,864
When heathcliff came home
with a sizzling scalp
334
00:18:23,864 --> 00:18:26,464
you were not
very understanding
335
00:18:26,464 --> 00:18:30,831
especially considering the
matter of a certain tattoo.
336
00:18:30,831 --> 00:18:31,698
Tattoo?
337
00:18:31,698 --> 00:18:32,798
Let's eat.
338
00:18:32,798 --> 00:18:33,964
What tattoo?
339
00:18:33,964 --> 00:18:37,131
Dinner won't be ready
for a while.
340
00:18:37,131 --> 00:18:39,264
I'll have
some cheese.
341
00:18:39,264 --> 00:18:41,131
I really
don't think
342
00:18:41,131 --> 00:18:43,631
that is an
appropriate issue
343
00:18:43,631 --> 00:18:46,631
to discuss in front
of the family.
344
00:18:46,631 --> 00:18:49,131
When your father
was Theodore's age
345
00:18:49,131 --> 00:18:52,464
he was enamored of me
to such an extent
346
00:18:52,464 --> 00:18:56,464
that he had my name
Tattooed across his chest.
347
00:19:00,631 --> 00:19:02,498
He did what?
348
00:19:02,498 --> 00:19:05,031
When I heard
what he'd done
349
00:19:05,031 --> 00:19:07,198
I was enormously
flattered
350
00:19:07,198 --> 00:19:10,631
until I saw
my name was misspelled.
351
00:19:13,031 --> 00:19:15,864
As I understood it,
he went to
352
00:19:15,864 --> 00:19:19,198
the best tattoo man
in the county--
353
00:19:19,198 --> 00:19:20,798
"Hot needle" Harris.
354
00:19:22,331 --> 00:19:28,064
It was the middle of february,
and Russell had a terrible cold
355
00:19:28,064 --> 00:19:33,064
So when he went to "Hot needle"
And told him to write "Anna"
356
00:19:33,064 --> 00:19:37,064
His nose was clogged up,
and it sounded like "Adda"--
357
00:19:37,064 --> 00:19:39,064
A-d-d-a.
358
00:19:41,198 --> 00:19:44,464
My chief rival then
for Russell's affection
359
00:19:44,464 --> 00:19:47,398
was a girl named
ADDA Mae ward.
360
00:19:47,398 --> 00:19:48,631
Oh, no!
361
00:19:48,631 --> 00:19:50,698
She was a
little girl
362
00:19:50,698 --> 00:19:53,298
who lived down the road
363
00:19:53,298 --> 00:19:58,131
and thought the Sun didn't shine
until she woke up.
364
00:20:02,131 --> 00:20:06,798
Of course, I insisted
that he remove the tattoo
365
00:20:06,798 --> 00:20:09,431
and that left a scar
366
00:20:09,431 --> 00:20:11,131
on his
chest.
367
00:20:16,131 --> 00:20:18,131
You told me
368
00:20:18,131 --> 00:20:24,131
that you got that scar
in World War Ii...
369
00:20:28,064 --> 00:20:34,098
fighting off a German
nazi panzer attack.
370
00:20:34,098 --> 00:20:38,064
That was the best way
I could think of
371
00:20:38,064 --> 00:20:43,464
to describe what I went through
When Anna saw that tattoo.
372
00:20:43,464 --> 00:20:46,464
I'm shocked.
373
00:20:46,464 --> 00:20:48,564
You huxtable
men are crazy.
374
00:20:48,564 --> 00:20:49,764
Yes.
375
00:20:49,764 --> 00:20:52,798
But we always get our women.
376
00:20:52,798 --> 00:20:56,064
But not because of
the things you do--
377
00:20:56,064 --> 00:20:57,598
despite them.
378
00:20:57,598 --> 00:21:03,131
Theodore, welcome
to the club.
379
00:21:04,798 --> 00:21:06,964
The three huxtable men--
380
00:21:06,964 --> 00:21:11,798
scar-chest, skinhead,
and hole-in-the-lobe.
381
00:21:20,531 --> 00:21:23,731
Captioning made possible by
the U.S.
23531
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof