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1
00:00:49,508 --> 00:00:50,467
LeBeau.
2
00:00:50,509 --> 00:00:51,385
Ici.
3
00:00:51,426 --> 00:00:52,260
Carter.
Aye.
4
00:00:52,302 --> 00:00:53,762
Newkirk.
Ici.
5
00:00:53,804 --> 00:00:54,554
Kinchloe.
Yeah.
6
00:00:54,596 --> 00:00:55,639
Hogan.
7
00:00:55,681 --> 00:00:57,057
Yeah, here.
8
00:00:57,099 --> 00:00:58,809
Everybody here?
9
00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:00,477
Don't question it,
Schultz, enjoy it.
10
00:01:00,477 --> 00:01:03,146
You are so right,
Colonel Hogan.
11
00:01:03,146 --> 00:01:06,316
The end of
a perfect day.
12
00:01:06,358 --> 00:01:08,318
I couldn't ask
for anything...
13
00:01:08,318 --> 00:01:10,487
Report!
14
00:01:10,487 --> 00:01:13,281
Report!
15
00:01:17,494 --> 00:01:21,081
Herr Kommandant,
beg to report that...
16
00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:22,582
You beg to report
that what?
17
00:01:27,337 --> 00:01:28,505
Klink, darling!
18
00:01:28,547 --> 00:01:30,507
I have come back to you!
19
00:01:32,843 --> 00:01:33,760
To me?
20
00:01:33,802 --> 00:01:36,972
Look at him, Waffy.
21
00:01:37,014 --> 00:01:38,098
Is he not beautiful?!
22
00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:42,018
Oh, Klinky...
23
00:01:42,018 --> 00:01:42,811
Oh...
24
00:01:44,563 --> 00:01:47,691
Crush me in your strong arms,
Klink, darling.
25
00:01:47,691 --> 00:01:49,025
Hold me, hurt me...
26
00:01:49,025 --> 00:01:50,819
It's what I've been
longing for.
27
00:01:52,362 --> 00:01:54,197
What do you make
of that, Colonel?
28
00:01:54,197 --> 00:01:55,365
Things were running
too smoothly
29
00:01:55,365 --> 00:01:56,783
is what I make of it.
30
00:01:56,825 --> 00:01:59,369
I didn't know she had
a thing going with Klink.
31
00:01:59,369 --> 00:02:00,412
She could
not, never.
32
00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:01,580
Pure as the
driven snow...
33
00:02:01,788 --> 00:02:02,873
practically.
34
00:02:02,914 --> 00:02:04,040
LeBeau, do me a favor...
35
00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:04,833
Hold it.
36
00:02:06,710 --> 00:02:08,086
Look at our other
visiting fireman.
37
00:02:13,759 --> 00:02:14,968
Waffy, dear,
38
00:02:15,010 --> 00:02:18,597
this is my gorgeous
Kommandant Klink.
39
00:02:18,638 --> 00:02:20,348
Mmm!
40
00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:22,893
Look upon him and eat
your Prussian heart out.
41
00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:24,895
Sir, I assure you,
for my part,
42
00:02:24,895 --> 00:02:26,688
I have not made the
slightest overtures,
43
00:02:26,730 --> 00:02:27,773
nor the most
delicate innuendoes.
44
00:02:29,566 --> 00:02:32,235
Do not concern yourself,
Klink, darling.
45
00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:34,821
Waffy and I are merely
as brother and sister...
46
00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:36,031
Nothing.
47
00:02:36,072 --> 00:02:39,826
Oh, did I say that this
is Count von Waffenschmidt?
48
00:02:39,868 --> 00:02:40,911
Oh, Count von
Waffenschmidt,
49
00:02:40,911 --> 00:02:42,245
it's a great
honor, sir.
50
00:02:42,287 --> 00:02:43,747
And once more
may I say
51
00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:45,248
that I categorically
state that I...
52
00:02:45,290 --> 00:02:48,460
Is it possible to transact
our affairs inside?
53
00:02:48,502 --> 00:02:51,421
Or should we stand here
like vegetable merchants?
54
00:02:51,421 --> 00:02:52,964
Oh, into my office,
by all means.
55
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:54,508
It's a great honor,
Count von Waffenschmidt.
56
00:02:54,549 --> 00:02:56,927
Schultz,
the door, the door.
57
00:02:56,968 --> 00:02:57,552
Jawohl, Herr
Kommandant.
58
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:02,474
Do not be jealous
of him, Klink, darling.
59
00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:04,017
He is nothing to me.
60
00:03:04,059 --> 00:03:05,727
You are everything.
61
00:03:05,769 --> 00:03:07,395
Huh?
62
00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:08,563
How very kind of you.
63
00:03:11,608 --> 00:03:12,776
Hmm...
64
00:03:12,817 --> 00:03:15,028
She has come
to see me, I feel it.
65
00:03:15,070 --> 00:03:16,571
Did she look
over here once?
66
00:03:16,613 --> 00:03:17,572
Once?!
67
00:03:17,614 --> 00:03:19,115
She could not
trust herself.
68
00:03:19,115 --> 00:03:21,451
That should be an interesting
conversation, Colonel.
69
00:03:21,451 --> 00:03:22,827
Yeah, let's
listen in, huh?
70
00:03:37,592 --> 00:03:40,929
That's very interesting,
Count von Waffenschmidt.
71
00:03:40,971 --> 00:03:43,306
So you are going
to the Russian front?
72
00:03:43,348 --> 00:03:44,975
That's a wonderful
place to visit,
73
00:03:44,975 --> 00:03:47,519
but I wouldn't want
to die there.
74
00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:51,773
There's a train running
by here in the morning.
75
00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:54,651
Marya and I will be on it.
76
00:03:54,693 --> 00:03:58,947
You have only tonight
for love, Klink.
77
00:03:58,989 --> 00:04:00,573
Enough?
78
00:04:01,616 --> 00:04:03,159
Tell him,
Klink, darling.
79
00:04:03,201 --> 00:04:04,494
As a matter of fact,
80
00:04:04,536 --> 00:04:06,413
I believe I'm on
guard duty tonight.
81
00:04:06,454 --> 00:04:08,665
Oh, you're so right,
Klink, darling.
82
00:04:08,707 --> 00:04:10,125
En garde...
83
00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:16,214
Merely transact your sordid
affairs out of my sight.
84
00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:19,759
And your quarters, Klink,
do they carry out the, uh...
85
00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:23,388
decor of your office...
"Early Grubby"?
86
00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:28,018
"Grubby"... grubby,
yes, but home, sir.
87
00:04:28,018 --> 00:04:30,020
Good, I will sleep there.
88
00:04:30,061 --> 00:04:32,689
Do not disturb me.
89
00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:35,066
Waffy is petulant,
Klink, darling,
90
00:04:35,108 --> 00:04:37,027
because I forced him
to come here.
91
00:04:37,027 --> 00:04:38,778
Be realistic...
What can you do
92
00:04:38,820 --> 00:04:40,864
with a suitcase
chained to your wrist?
93
00:04:40,864 --> 00:04:43,616
Really, Marya, what possible
difference does it make
94
00:04:43,658 --> 00:04:46,161
if I ignore you
with one hand or two?
95
00:04:46,202 --> 00:04:47,495
Hah!
96
00:04:47,537 --> 00:04:50,331
You beg to be a courier so you
can be a refugee from life.
97
00:04:50,373 --> 00:04:51,541
Pooey.
98
00:04:51,583 --> 00:04:53,543
It is all
a crushing bore:
99
00:04:53,585 --> 00:04:56,421
you, this, him, the Russian
front, everything.
100
00:04:56,463 --> 00:04:57,839
If you will
excuse me,
101
00:04:57,881 --> 00:04:59,591
I must post
the guard now.
102
00:04:59,632 --> 00:05:00,967
Oh, no, no, no.
103
00:05:01,009 --> 00:05:03,136
The evening belongs
to me, Klink, darling.
104
00:05:03,178 --> 00:05:08,141
Where can we go that
is intimate, romantic?
105
00:05:08,183 --> 00:05:10,226
The mess hall?
106
00:05:10,268 --> 00:05:14,731
Anywhere, Klink, darling...
With you, anywhere.
107
00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:15,732
I wonder...
108
00:05:15,774 --> 00:05:16,649
How could she?!
109
00:05:16,691 --> 00:05:18,109
Klink?! Bah!
110
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:19,444
LeBeau, you're
around the bend.
111
00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:21,112
Wait a minute,
wait a minute...
112
00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:22,572
I'm trying
to sort this out.
113
00:05:22,614 --> 00:05:24,783
I don't trust her, but
I don't underestimate her.
114
00:05:24,824 --> 00:05:26,743
She knows we've got Klink's
office bugged, right?
115
00:05:26,785 --> 00:05:28,578
Or she's got
a pretty good idea.
116
00:05:28,578 --> 00:05:30,997
So that conversation might
have been meant for us.
117
00:05:31,039 --> 00:05:31,831
It's just possible.
118
00:05:31,873 --> 00:05:33,249
Now, what do we got?
119
00:05:33,249 --> 00:05:35,710
A courier on his way
to the Russian front
120
00:05:35,752 --> 00:05:38,379
with an attaché case
chained to his wrist,
121
00:05:38,421 --> 00:05:40,799
and he's sleeping in
Klink's quarters tonight.
122
00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:44,219
Hey, maybe
she wants us
123
00:05:44,260 --> 00:05:46,721
to steal
that attaché case.
124
00:05:46,763 --> 00:05:48,890
While she takes Klink
out of the way.
125
00:05:48,932 --> 00:05:50,517
You see, and you doubted her.
126
00:05:50,558 --> 00:05:52,560
That may be it...
Maybe.
127
00:05:52,602 --> 00:05:53,853
So what do we do?
128
00:05:53,895 --> 00:05:55,438
Wait till we find out
definitely?
129
00:05:55,438 --> 00:05:57,607
They're leaving camp
tomorrow morning.
130
00:05:57,607 --> 00:06:00,985
So we go
to work tonight.
131
00:06:22,757 --> 00:06:24,801
Was there
something you wanted?
132
00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:26,761
Wasn't this
the room
133
00:06:26,803 --> 00:06:28,346
that called
for a plumber?
134
00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:31,808
A fine example, I
believe, of gallows humor.
135
00:06:31,849 --> 00:06:33,059
Schultz!
136
00:06:33,101 --> 00:06:35,395
Now, stand
right over there...
137
00:06:35,436 --> 00:06:38,815
and quietly,
most quietly.
138
00:06:38,815 --> 00:06:39,857
You wouldn't believe
139
00:06:39,899 --> 00:06:42,151
we were looking for
a red-headed bird named Ginger?
140
00:06:42,193 --> 00:06:43,194
No.
141
00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:45,196
No, I didn't think
you would somehow.
142
00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:46,322
Count von
Waffenschmidt,
143
00:06:46,364 --> 00:06:47,907
Sergeant Schultz
reporting,
144
00:06:47,949 --> 00:06:49,575
alert
and on guard...
145
00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:52,704
Colonel Hogan,
Newkirk.
146
00:06:52,745 --> 00:06:53,705
Hi, Schultz.
147
00:06:53,746 --> 00:06:55,123
Nice to see
you, Schultzy.
148
00:06:55,164 --> 00:06:57,000
I see you know
these men, Schultz.
149
00:06:57,041 --> 00:06:58,793
Of course, Count
von Waffenschmidt.
150
00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:01,129
Those are our
prisoners of war.
151
00:07:01,170 --> 00:07:03,381
Any idea how they got in here?
152
00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:05,216
Not the slightest.
153
00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:07,010
Then I will tell you.
154
00:07:07,010 --> 00:07:10,888
They came right past your nose
as you were sleeping.
155
00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:16,019
Oh, a brilliant conclusion,
Count von Waff...
156
00:07:16,019 --> 00:07:18,021
I will deal
with you later, Schultz.
157
00:07:18,021 --> 00:07:22,442
Colonel Hogan,
would you like to know
158
00:07:22,483 --> 00:07:24,402
the contents of this?
159
00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:25,945
If it wouldn't
be prying.
160
00:07:25,987 --> 00:07:28,031
It contains honey,
161
00:07:28,072 --> 00:07:31,576
and you are the first fly
to catch his feet in it.
162
00:07:31,659 --> 00:07:33,578
Glad you told me.
163
00:07:33,619 --> 00:07:35,330
I should be more specific.
164
00:07:35,371 --> 00:07:36,998
We have been troubled
165
00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:39,500
for the past
six months by spies.
166
00:07:39,542 --> 00:07:41,627
Our general staff
sends battle plans
167
00:07:41,669 --> 00:07:42,837
to the Russian front,
168
00:07:42,879 --> 00:07:44,714
but somehow
the Russians have them
169
00:07:44,714 --> 00:07:47,175
before our own troops.
170
00:07:47,216 --> 00:07:51,596
Obviously a very
clever ring.
171
00:07:51,637 --> 00:07:55,058
My, uh, sympathies
to the general staff.
172
00:07:55,058 --> 00:07:58,144
This time we do things
a bit differently.
173
00:07:58,186 --> 00:08:01,481
I carry the battle plans
to the front myself.
174
00:08:01,522 --> 00:08:05,818
With me is Marya, whom we have
been watching for some time.
175
00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:09,363
Now, if she cares to
detour along the way,
176
00:08:09,405 --> 00:08:11,240
I allow it...
177
00:08:11,282 --> 00:08:15,078
Such as our stopover here
at Stalag 13.
178
00:08:15,078 --> 00:08:18,706
You begin to get
the picture, Hogan?
179
00:08:18,748 --> 00:08:21,209
Certainly looks bad
for Klink, doesn't it?
180
00:08:21,250 --> 00:08:23,920
Oh, not Klink... you.
181
00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:26,589
You are the first of her
contacts I have apprehended,
182
00:08:26,631 --> 00:08:29,592
and in a short while
I will have the whole ring.
183
00:08:29,592 --> 00:08:32,386
Now, Schultz, both
of these men will remain
184
00:08:32,428 --> 00:08:34,055
under the most
stringent security
185
00:08:34,096 --> 00:08:36,516
until I return
from Russia.
186
00:08:36,557 --> 00:08:38,601
At that time, the Gestapo
in Berlin will undertake
187
00:08:38,601 --> 00:08:41,437
the interrogation under
my personal direction.
188
00:08:41,437 --> 00:08:43,606
Should either
of them escape,
189
00:08:43,606 --> 00:08:45,942
your life
will be forfeit.
190
00:08:45,942 --> 00:08:47,068
Understand?
191
00:08:47,109 --> 00:08:48,903
Count von Waffenschmidt,
192
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:52,031
while I certainly
am honored
193
00:08:52,073 --> 00:08:54,784
by this assignment,
there are guards here
194
00:08:54,784 --> 00:08:57,703
who are younger
and...
195
00:08:57,745 --> 00:08:59,789
more in need of
recognition and...
196
00:08:59,831 --> 00:09:02,291
You, Schultz!
197
00:09:02,291 --> 00:09:03,417
Now take them away.
198
00:09:03,459 --> 00:09:04,794
Jawohl.
199
00:09:05,086 --> 00:09:07,797
Until my return,
Colonel Hogan,
200
00:09:07,797 --> 00:09:11,425
when we shall become
more closely acquainted.
201
00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:13,928
Colonel Hogan,
Newkirk!
202
00:09:19,308 --> 00:09:21,727
You will stay away
from the front lines?
203
00:09:21,769 --> 00:09:23,312
Definitely.
204
00:09:49,630 --> 00:09:50,673
Reporting for
duty, Colonel.
205
00:09:50,715 --> 00:09:52,883
I know what you are
thinking, mon colonel,
206
00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:54,343
but she is
innocent, innocent.
207
00:09:54,343 --> 00:09:56,971
And you're out of your mind,
but keep your voices down.
208
00:09:57,013 --> 00:09:58,764
She is innocent.
209
00:09:58,806 --> 00:10:01,017
Then what are we in
here for, double parking?
210
00:10:01,058 --> 00:10:03,436
All right, look... they set a
trap and we walked into it.
211
00:10:03,477 --> 00:10:05,479
I could get you out
of here, Colonel.
212
00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:07,356
See, all I got
to do is pour
213
00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:08,858
a couple of drops
of nitroglycerin
214
00:10:08,899 --> 00:10:10,526
into the cell
door lock there
215
00:10:10,526 --> 00:10:11,819
and she swings
right open.
216
00:10:11,861 --> 00:10:13,195
Not good enough.
217
00:10:13,195 --> 00:10:14,322
Well, surely
that's better
218
00:10:14,363 --> 00:10:16,949
than doing a waltz with
the Gestapo in Berlin, sir.
219
00:10:16,991 --> 00:10:18,534
I'm not planning
on doing either.
220
00:10:18,576 --> 00:10:21,203
Somehow I'm going to get
my hands on those plans
221
00:10:21,203 --> 00:10:22,330
in that attaché case.
222
00:10:22,371 --> 00:10:24,749
But won't they be on that
train tomorrow morning
223
00:10:24,790 --> 00:10:26,375
that's going to
the Russian front?
224
00:10:26,417 --> 00:10:28,169
So will we.
225
00:10:28,210 --> 00:10:30,671
Maybe I should go home
for that nitroglycerin.
226
00:10:30,713 --> 00:10:31,839
Go with LeBeau.
227
00:10:32,214 --> 00:10:35,217
Get into a German general's
uniform, special forces.
228
00:10:35,259 --> 00:10:36,510
Tell Kinch to go out
229
00:10:36,552 --> 00:10:38,971
and set a time bomb
on the tracks of that train.
230
00:10:39,013 --> 00:10:40,765
I want it delayed
for about three hours.
231
00:10:40,806 --> 00:10:42,767
Oui...
That I understand.
232
00:10:42,808 --> 00:10:46,270
Colonel, is there anything
special you want me to do
233
00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:47,897
as a German general?
234
00:10:47,897 --> 00:10:50,566
Recruit us all
into the Wehrmacht.
235
00:10:50,566 --> 00:10:54,153
We're joining
the German army?
236
00:10:54,195 --> 00:10:55,821
Just for a short time.
237
00:10:55,863 --> 00:10:59,575
Oh, well, if it's
only for a short time.
238
00:10:59,575 --> 00:11:02,495
On a suicide mission
to the Russian front.
239
00:11:09,126 --> 00:11:13,631
Herr Kommandant,
they went to the train station.
240
00:11:13,672 --> 00:11:15,091
Are you sure?
241
00:11:15,132 --> 00:11:16,550
The woman, too?
242
00:11:16,592 --> 00:11:20,137
Count von Waffenschmidt
and the woman.
243
00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:21,806
Oh, what a relief.
244
00:11:21,847 --> 00:11:23,849
I'm a prisoner in my own camp.
245
00:11:23,891 --> 00:11:26,018
All night I've been
trying to avoid her.
246
00:11:26,060 --> 00:11:27,937
I should get involved
with a Russian
247
00:11:27,937 --> 00:11:30,106
traveling with
a jealous count?
248
00:11:30,106 --> 00:11:33,776
Oh, Herr Kommandant,
it was a very hard night.
249
00:11:33,776 --> 00:11:38,906
Perhaps we both
could take the day off.
250
00:11:38,948 --> 00:11:40,825
Excellent idea,
Schultz.
251
00:11:40,866 --> 00:11:43,327
Ah, my own quarters,
a warm glass of milk
252
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:44,787
in my own warm bed.
253
00:11:44,787 --> 00:11:47,123
So!
254
00:11:47,123 --> 00:11:49,041
9:00 in the morning
255
00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:50,709
and already
we're going to bed.
256
00:11:50,751 --> 00:11:53,379
What is this,
a rest camp or a prison camp?!
257
00:11:53,420 --> 00:11:54,296
Achtung!
258
00:11:54,338 --> 00:11:56,799
Ah, how very nice
to see you, General, uh...
259
00:11:56,799 --> 00:11:59,009
Reifschneider... a name
you will not soon forget!
260
00:11:59,051 --> 00:12:00,177
No, certainly,
General Reifschneider.
261
00:12:00,219 --> 00:12:01,679
A great pleasure,
General Reifschneider.
262
00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:03,264
You see,
Sergeant Schultz and I
263
00:12:03,305 --> 00:12:05,432
were just having
a bit of a joke,
264
00:12:05,474 --> 00:12:06,809
as you might call it.
265
00:12:06,809 --> 00:12:08,435
"Treason" I would call it.
266
00:12:08,477 --> 00:12:11,647
In Berlin we have two words
for sleeping on the job...
267
00:12:11,647 --> 00:12:13,107
Boom, boom.
268
00:12:13,148 --> 00:12:14,650
"Boom, boom."
269
00:12:14,692 --> 00:12:15,401
Correct, sir.
270
00:12:15,442 --> 00:12:17,111
You're absolutely right.
271
00:12:17,152 --> 00:12:18,487
Remember that, Schultz.
272
00:12:18,487 --> 00:12:20,072
Me, Herr Kommandant?
273
00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:21,240
So!
274
00:12:21,282 --> 00:12:23,534
Where is your
security here, Klink?!
275
00:12:23,576 --> 00:12:26,120
No one told you
when I arrived!
276
00:12:26,161 --> 00:12:29,081
No one called you when
I came to the gates, no!
277
00:12:29,123 --> 00:12:30,416
General Reifschneider,
heads will roll.
278
00:12:30,457 --> 00:12:32,126
You can be assured
of that.
279
00:12:32,167 --> 00:12:34,378
I am... a very shiny one.
280
00:12:34,420 --> 00:12:36,171
Very clever,
General Reifschneider.
281
00:12:36,213 --> 00:12:39,258
No one enjoys a good laugh
more than I do, but...
282
00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:40,676
Enough small talk.
283
00:12:40,718 --> 00:12:42,219
Of course,
General Reifschneider.
284
00:12:42,261 --> 00:12:44,805
I mean after all,
two busy men like us
285
00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:46,181
have no time for small...
286
00:12:46,223 --> 00:12:47,182
Enough, Klink!
287
00:12:47,224 --> 00:12:48,142
Enough, Klink!
288
00:12:48,183 --> 00:12:49,268
Yes, sir.
289
00:12:49,310 --> 00:12:52,646
Now prop open your eyes
and listen to me.
290
00:12:52,688 --> 00:12:54,023
I have come from Berlin
291
00:12:54,064 --> 00:12:57,860
to recruit a very
special squad...
292
00:12:57,901 --> 00:13:00,237
Men who have nothing
to live for
293
00:13:00,279 --> 00:13:02,656
and so will not be
afraid to die.
294
00:13:02,698 --> 00:13:05,618
In a word, prisoners.
295
00:13:05,909 --> 00:13:06,785
Prisoners?
296
00:13:06,827 --> 00:13:08,704
Oh...
take all you want...
297
00:13:08,746 --> 00:13:10,247
Liberty hall.
298
00:13:10,289 --> 00:13:14,710
About five will do for a suicide
squad to the Russian front!
299
00:13:14,752 --> 00:13:16,629
After Stalag 13,
they would go anywhere,
300
00:13:16,670 --> 00:13:18,422
if I may say so, sir.
301
00:13:18,464 --> 00:13:19,465
You just did.
302
00:13:19,506 --> 00:13:21,175
Thank you for noticing it,
General Reifschneider.
303
00:13:21,383 --> 00:13:23,177
Schultz!
304
00:13:23,218 --> 00:13:24,845
Round up five prisoners!
305
00:13:24,887 --> 00:13:25,763
Jawohl, Herr Kommandant.
306
00:13:25,804 --> 00:13:27,056
Klink!
307
00:13:27,097 --> 00:13:29,350
If I had wanted you
to pick the prisoners,
308
00:13:29,391 --> 00:13:30,851
I could have stayed in Berlin!
309
00:13:30,893 --> 00:13:32,311
I will pick the men!
310
00:13:32,353 --> 00:13:34,980
And you will do a much better
job, General Reifschneider.
311
00:13:35,022 --> 00:13:36,065
Schultz, countermand that order.
312
00:13:36,065 --> 00:13:37,066
Jawohl,
Herr Kommandant.
313
00:13:37,107 --> 00:13:39,735
Come! When I see the men
I will know them.
314
00:13:39,777 --> 00:13:40,569
Certainly, General
Reifschneider.
315
00:13:40,569 --> 00:13:41,737
Schultz, you come with us.
316
00:13:41,737 --> 00:13:42,863
Jawohl,
Herr Kommandant.
317
00:13:42,905 --> 00:13:43,906
Herr Kommandant...
318
00:13:43,947 --> 00:13:46,325
And after that,
could I have the day off?
319
00:13:46,367 --> 00:13:47,451
Schultz.
320
00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:48,410
Klink!
321
00:13:48,410 --> 00:13:49,578
Ah, Klink.
322
00:13:51,205 --> 00:13:51,997
Achtung!
323
00:13:58,045 --> 00:13:59,129
Achtung!
324
00:13:59,171 --> 00:14:00,130
Ah...
325
00:14:00,172 --> 00:14:00,756
Restricted area.
326
00:14:00,798 --> 00:14:02,216
Back to the barracks
at once.
327
00:14:02,257 --> 00:14:03,467
I'm sorry, General
Reifschneider.
328
00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:04,927
Their names?
329
00:14:04,927 --> 00:14:07,888
Corporal LeBeau,
Sergeant Kinchloe.
330
00:14:07,930 --> 00:14:10,891
Corrective discipline will be
taken at once, trust me, sir.
331
00:14:10,933 --> 00:14:12,101
I shall take them.
332
00:14:12,101 --> 00:14:14,228
Excellent idea,
General Reifschneider.
333
00:14:14,269 --> 00:14:16,021
Fit them with German
uniforms... Wehrmacht.
334
00:14:16,063 --> 00:14:18,816
They fall out for the
Russian front within the hour.
335
00:14:18,857 --> 00:14:20,734
Wait a minute!
Don't we have a choice?
336
00:14:20,776 --> 00:14:21,735
None!
337
00:14:21,777 --> 00:14:22,903
You are volunteers.
338
00:14:22,945 --> 00:14:24,822
Who's in there?
339
00:14:24,863 --> 00:14:26,865
Oh, uh, top-security prisoners
340
00:14:26,907 --> 00:14:29,243
held by Count von Waffenschmidt
and the Gestapo, sir.
341
00:14:29,284 --> 00:14:30,285
Good.
342
00:14:30,285 --> 00:14:32,037
I shall look at them.
343
00:14:32,079 --> 00:14:33,288
But General Reifschneider,
I... I...
344
00:14:36,125 --> 00:14:39,002
But, General Reifschneider, my
instructions are most specific.
345
00:14:39,044 --> 00:14:40,921
These men are
to be held here
346
00:14:40,963 --> 00:14:42,756
until Count von
Waffenschmidt returns.
347
00:14:42,798 --> 00:14:45,134
If they're not here,
I will be shot.
348
00:14:45,175 --> 00:14:47,636
If you don't release
them to me,
349
00:14:47,678 --> 00:14:48,971
you shall be shot now.
350
00:14:49,012 --> 00:14:49,638
It is your choice.
351
00:14:51,765 --> 00:14:54,309
I think I should prefer
to be shot later.
352
00:14:54,309 --> 00:14:55,894
Congratulations.
353
00:14:55,936 --> 00:14:57,396
You men have just volunteered
354
00:14:57,437 --> 00:15:00,357
for a glorious suicide mission
to the Russian front.
355
00:15:00,399 --> 00:15:01,942
I need one more.
356
00:15:01,984 --> 00:15:03,235
Uh, General,
357
00:15:03,277 --> 00:15:04,653
Sergeant Carter
of our outfit
358
00:15:04,695 --> 00:15:06,280
would be
a very good choice.
359
00:15:06,321 --> 00:15:07,489
Why?
360
00:15:07,531 --> 00:15:09,449
Well, he's not
too bright.
361
00:15:09,491 --> 00:15:10,409
Perfect volunteer.
362
00:15:10,450 --> 00:15:12,536
I'll take him.
363
00:15:12,578 --> 00:15:15,163
Uniforms for all;
they have a train to catch.
364
00:15:15,205 --> 00:15:16,456
Guards!
365
00:15:16,498 --> 00:15:18,834
The prisoners have just
joined the Wehrmacht.
366
00:15:18,834 --> 00:15:20,335
Call the quartermaster.
367
00:15:20,377 --> 00:15:22,087
Uniforms for everybody.
368
00:15:22,129 --> 00:15:23,797
Klink, one thing more.
369
00:15:23,839 --> 00:15:25,173
Please, General...
370
00:15:25,215 --> 00:15:27,843
Klink, I am trying
to help you.
371
00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:29,386
Really?
372
00:15:29,428 --> 00:15:31,305
If you do not
wish to be around
373
00:15:31,346 --> 00:15:33,265
when Count
von Waffenschmidt returns,
374
00:15:33,307 --> 00:15:34,349
how about a transfer?
375
00:15:34,391 --> 00:15:37,644
Oh, anywhere, anywhere at all,
General Reifschneider.
376
00:15:37,686 --> 00:15:38,896
Good!
377
00:15:38,937 --> 00:15:41,189
You shall be the leader
of the suicide squad.
378
00:15:43,233 --> 00:15:45,694
Fall out with full field pack
in ten minutes.
379
00:15:45,694 --> 00:15:46,820
I'm returning to Berlin.
380
00:15:46,862 --> 00:15:48,655
But...
381
00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:52,492
Well, uh,
congratulations, sir.
382
00:15:52,534 --> 00:15:54,453
Just what you've
always wanted.
383
00:15:54,494 --> 00:15:58,165
Hogan, where
did I go wrong?
384
00:16:10,969 --> 00:16:12,721
Getting colder, isn't it?
385
00:16:12,763 --> 00:16:14,389
Oh, uh, colder.
386
00:16:14,389 --> 00:16:15,641
Yes, definitely.
387
00:16:15,682 --> 00:16:18,477
Every mile now,
colder.
388
00:16:18,518 --> 00:16:20,729
Every half mile
even... colder.
389
00:16:20,771 --> 00:16:23,440
Yeah, getting colder, all right.
390
00:16:23,482 --> 00:16:24,566
I know it's cold.
391
00:16:24,566 --> 00:16:26,276
I can feel it,
I'm freezing.
392
00:16:26,318 --> 00:16:28,987
Why do you have to keep
reminding me of it?
393
00:16:29,029 --> 00:16:30,364
That's a good sign...
Irritable.
394
00:16:30,405 --> 00:16:32,783
Means he's honed to
a fine edge for combat.
395
00:16:32,824 --> 00:16:35,202
Hogan, why do you have
to keep saying that?
396
00:16:35,243 --> 00:16:36,912
Honed to a fine edge
for what?
397
00:16:36,953 --> 00:16:38,914
I don't even know
what our mission is.
398
00:16:38,955 --> 00:16:40,248
Well, we'll probably
get sealed orders
399
00:16:40,290 --> 00:16:41,583
when we get
to the front.
400
00:16:41,625 --> 00:16:43,085
That's the way these
things usually work.
401
00:16:43,085 --> 00:16:43,960
Why?!
402
00:16:44,002 --> 00:16:46,129
What is the rhyme
or reason of it?
403
00:16:46,171 --> 00:16:48,298
Why do I have to be
snatched away
404
00:16:48,340 --> 00:16:50,967
from a warm,
dry, safe Stalag 13
405
00:16:51,009 --> 00:16:55,222
and be sent on some suicide
mission by some madman?
406
00:16:55,263 --> 00:16:56,932
General
Reifschneider, sir?
407
00:16:56,973 --> 00:16:58,225
Yes, General
Reifschneider!
408
00:16:58,266 --> 00:16:59,935
I'm not afraid
to say it.
409
00:16:59,935 --> 00:17:02,104
And I shall certainly deny
that I did.
410
00:17:02,104 --> 00:17:04,106
Courageous
stand, sir.
411
00:17:09,277 --> 00:17:10,862
She is coming, Colonel, Marya.
412
00:17:10,904 --> 00:17:12,072
Marya?
413
00:17:12,114 --> 00:17:13,115
The Russian?
414
00:17:13,156 --> 00:17:14,408
From what direction?
415
00:17:14,449 --> 00:17:15,242
This way, sir.
416
00:17:16,618 --> 00:17:17,661
I'm going
that direction.
417
00:17:17,702 --> 00:17:19,496
She was the cause
of it all.
418
00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:21,081
Somehow I feel that
she's responsible.
419
00:17:21,123 --> 00:17:22,416
She couldn't
help herself, sir.
420
00:17:22,457 --> 00:17:23,625
It's your
legendary charm.
421
00:17:23,625 --> 00:17:26,878
I will not let her spoil
my last few miserable hours.
422
00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:28,088
Better go with him...
423
00:17:28,130 --> 00:17:29,714
Make sure he doesn't
jump off the train, huh?
424
00:17:33,343 --> 00:17:34,928
And you will see,
mon colonel,
425
00:17:34,970 --> 00:17:35,804
she's completely
innocent.
426
00:17:35,804 --> 00:17:37,806
And the Russian front
is a summer resort.
427
00:17:37,848 --> 00:17:38,807
See you later.
428
00:17:38,849 --> 00:17:43,728
Oh, you look lovely
in your little uniform.
429
00:17:44,729 --> 00:17:46,273
And you in yours.
430
00:17:48,984 --> 00:17:51,278
After eternities!
431
00:17:52,821 --> 00:17:54,322
Alone at last.
432
00:17:54,364 --> 00:17:55,490
Hold me, Hogan.
433
00:17:55,532 --> 00:17:57,117
Hold you after
what you did?
434
00:17:57,159 --> 00:17:58,577
I could strangle you.
435
00:17:58,618 --> 00:18:01,204
The small one,
how he trusts me.
436
00:18:01,246 --> 00:18:03,915
What a lesson for you
in his beautiful faith.
437
00:18:03,957 --> 00:18:06,126
Look, do you have
any idea at all
438
00:18:06,168 --> 00:18:06,960
what you're doing?
439
00:18:07,002 --> 00:18:09,004
Von Waffenschmidt
used you to trap me,
440
00:18:09,045 --> 00:18:11,339
and he's going
to do the same thing
441
00:18:11,381 --> 00:18:12,799
with all
your other contacts.
442
00:18:12,841 --> 00:18:13,884
How diabolical.
443
00:18:13,925 --> 00:18:15,510
It happens to be true,
444
00:18:15,552 --> 00:18:17,345
which is one
of the reasons I'm here.
445
00:18:17,345 --> 00:18:18,346
Oh, how sad.
446
00:18:18,346 --> 00:18:20,348
I thought you pursued
me out of passion.
447
00:18:20,348 --> 00:18:22,726
Look, stop the fun and games
for a minute
448
00:18:22,767 --> 00:18:24,686
and listen to what
I'm telling you.
449
00:18:24,728 --> 00:18:26,563
Von Waffenschmidt
knows you're an agent.
450
00:18:26,605 --> 00:18:28,273
After he grabs
all your contacts,
451
00:18:28,315 --> 00:18:29,524
he's going to grab you.
452
00:18:29,566 --> 00:18:30,859
I know.
453
00:18:30,901 --> 00:18:32,652
How long
have you known?
454
00:18:32,694 --> 00:18:33,945
From the beginning.
455
00:18:33,987 --> 00:18:36,197
Then why this business
at Stalag 13?
456
00:18:36,239 --> 00:18:38,116
You knew we had
Klink's office bugged.
457
00:18:38,158 --> 00:18:39,200
You practically told us
458
00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:40,994
you were getting him
out of the way
459
00:18:41,036 --> 00:18:42,871
so we'd make a grab
for the case.
460
00:18:42,871 --> 00:18:45,206
The attaché case
is of no importance;
461
00:18:45,206 --> 00:18:46,541
we already
have the plans.
462
00:18:46,541 --> 00:18:49,169
Then why did you have me
stick my neck out?
463
00:18:49,210 --> 00:18:51,046
Because I needed your
help, Hogan, darling,
464
00:18:51,046 --> 00:18:52,964
in the larger plan.
465
00:18:53,006 --> 00:18:55,383
Was that your way
of getting me to help you?!
466
00:18:55,383 --> 00:18:57,010
You're here.
467
00:18:57,052 --> 00:18:58,929
Hmm?
468
00:18:58,970 --> 00:19:00,347
All right, all right.
469
00:19:03,767 --> 00:19:05,226
What's it all about?
470
00:19:05,268 --> 00:19:07,604
First, say you trust me.
471
00:19:07,646 --> 00:19:09,564
Not for a second!
472
00:19:09,564 --> 00:19:11,024
I like you.
473
00:19:13,234 --> 00:19:16,071
Now, there
are generals
474
00:19:16,071 --> 00:19:17,447
on the German
general staff
475
00:19:17,489 --> 00:19:19,199
who wish to bring
down Hitler.
476
00:19:19,240 --> 00:19:21,117
Every battle plan
for the Eastern front
477
00:19:21,159 --> 00:19:22,953
is transmitted
by them in code
478
00:19:22,994 --> 00:19:24,579
to a secret station
in Switzerland.
479
00:19:24,579 --> 00:19:26,665
From there it finds
its way to Russia.
480
00:19:26,706 --> 00:19:28,750
Naturally the Germans
know there is a leak.
481
00:19:28,792 --> 00:19:30,585
Von Waffenschmidt
is trying to find it.
482
00:19:30,627 --> 00:19:31,336
Simple, no?
483
00:19:31,378 --> 00:19:33,046
And that's how
you already have
484
00:19:33,088 --> 00:19:34,839
the information
he's carrying with him.
485
00:19:34,881 --> 00:19:37,008
Brilliant,
Hogan, darling.
486
00:19:37,050 --> 00:19:39,594
This whole operation
is just to throw
487
00:19:39,594 --> 00:19:41,346
von Waffenschmidt
off the track,
488
00:19:41,388 --> 00:19:42,722
act as a red herring.
489
00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:46,226
Please, I'm
a White Russian!
490
00:19:46,267 --> 00:19:48,395
Got to get rid
of him somehow.
491
00:19:48,436 --> 00:19:50,063
Or discredit him.
492
00:19:50,105 --> 00:19:51,690
Don't worry, you'll
think of something.
493
00:19:51,731 --> 00:19:53,274
I'll think
of something, I will?
494
00:19:53,316 --> 00:19:54,359
Of course you will.
495
00:19:54,401 --> 00:19:56,069
I've already drugged
his brandy.
496
00:19:56,111 --> 00:19:58,238
He'll be out at least
another half hour.
497
00:19:58,279 --> 00:19:59,614
That's all, 30 minutes?
498
00:19:59,656 --> 00:20:01,241
Do not waste time.
499
00:20:01,282 --> 00:20:03,618
That leaves only
20 minutes for love.
500
00:20:10,125 --> 00:20:12,293
I think this is the one,
Colonel...
501
00:20:12,335 --> 00:20:14,796
Same one as
almost opened it before.
502
00:20:14,796 --> 00:20:15,755
Here we go.
503
00:20:15,797 --> 00:20:17,382
Ah.
504
00:20:17,424 --> 00:20:18,967
There, sir.
505
00:20:19,008 --> 00:20:20,093
Okay, Newkirk,
good work.
506
00:20:20,135 --> 00:20:22,470
Right, shouldn't I get
to work on the case, sir?
507
00:20:22,512 --> 00:20:24,472
Just take your knife
and cut the seal.
508
00:20:24,472 --> 00:20:27,350
What... all this and you
don't even want to open it?
509
00:20:27,392 --> 00:20:29,769
It just has to look
like it's been opened.
510
00:20:29,811 --> 00:20:30,770
He is brilliant.
511
00:20:30,812 --> 00:20:31,938
Trust him as I do.
512
00:20:31,980 --> 00:20:33,189
Cut, Newkirk.
513
00:20:33,231 --> 00:20:35,859
Okay, sir...
It's your show.
514
00:20:39,821 --> 00:20:40,989
Hmm...
515
00:20:41,030 --> 00:20:43,491
It looks like our boys
got the train stopped.
516
00:20:43,533 --> 00:20:46,953
What a marvelous way
to take advantage of me.
517
00:20:51,166 --> 00:20:52,750
Hey, LeBeau,
you sure you know
518
00:20:52,792 --> 00:20:54,252
how to run an engine?
519
00:20:54,294 --> 00:20:57,464
Of course I am sure I
know how to run an engine!
520
00:20:57,505 --> 00:20:59,674
Forward, I know how
to run an engine!
521
00:20:59,716 --> 00:21:02,802
Backward, I have not
had much practice!
522
00:21:07,891 --> 00:21:10,185
Probably
a new crew.
523
00:21:10,226 --> 00:21:12,187
On my last trip
must I be
524
00:21:12,187 --> 00:21:14,189
bounced around
like a bean bag?
525
00:21:20,653 --> 00:21:22,780
Well, I guess
they got it going now...
526
00:21:22,822 --> 00:21:23,781
I hope.
527
00:21:23,823 --> 00:21:26,201
Personally,
I'm in no hurry.
528
00:21:27,827 --> 00:21:29,412
Does it seem to you
529
00:21:29,454 --> 00:21:31,164
like the train is
going backwards?
530
00:21:35,251 --> 00:21:36,878
Oh, my head.
531
00:21:38,213 --> 00:21:40,423
What did you...
532
00:21:40,465 --> 00:21:42,592
You drank
too much, Waffy.
533
00:21:42,634 --> 00:21:44,219
One drink?
534
00:21:44,260 --> 00:21:45,261
That was too much.
535
00:21:47,055 --> 00:21:48,473
Might be the climate.
536
00:21:48,514 --> 00:21:51,434
Now, you are Hogan.
537
00:21:51,476 --> 00:21:55,396
Well... now, how
did you get here?
538
00:21:58,733 --> 00:22:00,068
Better check the seal.
539
00:22:04,572 --> 00:22:06,407
Looking for this?
540
00:22:06,449 --> 00:22:09,202
Oh, he forced me
to tell.
541
00:22:11,162 --> 00:22:13,873
So, now you shoot me?
542
00:22:13,915 --> 00:22:15,750
Not necessarily...
But the Gestapo might.
543
00:22:15,792 --> 00:22:16,960
Why?
544
00:22:17,001 --> 00:22:18,586
Several reasons.
545
00:22:18,628 --> 00:22:20,338
For losing
the battle plans?
546
00:22:20,380 --> 00:22:21,547
They're still
in there.
547
00:22:21,589 --> 00:22:23,132
But we might
have made copies.
548
00:22:23,174 --> 00:22:25,259
What happens then?
549
00:22:25,301 --> 00:22:26,678
You deliver them,
550
00:22:26,719 --> 00:22:28,638
the Russians already
have the plans,
551
00:22:28,680 --> 00:22:31,057
you get shot
as a traitor.
552
00:22:31,099 --> 00:22:34,769
But if I say the plans might
have been tampered with?
553
00:22:34,769 --> 00:22:37,438
They shoot
for inefficiency, Waffy.
554
00:22:37,480 --> 00:22:39,065
I see.
555
00:22:39,107 --> 00:22:41,609
Well, then...
556
00:22:41,609 --> 00:22:44,278
Go ahead... shoot.
557
00:22:44,320 --> 00:22:46,447
Too messy.
558
00:22:49,283 --> 00:22:51,160
But you
might defect.
559
00:22:51,202 --> 00:22:53,621
You could get me
out of Germany?
560
00:22:53,663 --> 00:22:54,956
It's possible.
561
00:22:54,997 --> 00:22:56,999
But I would be branded.
562
00:22:57,041 --> 00:22:58,835
They would consider me the head
563
00:22:58,876 --> 00:23:01,254
of the spy ring
I was sent to catch.
564
00:23:01,295 --> 00:23:03,089
They would take vengeance
on my wife.
565
00:23:03,131 --> 00:23:05,466
You love her
that much, Waffy?
566
00:23:05,466 --> 00:23:07,260
I will defect.
567
00:23:07,301 --> 00:23:10,805
You could be a great
asset to the free world.
568
00:23:10,805 --> 00:23:14,809
What are we
talking about?
569
00:23:14,851 --> 00:23:18,146
We are on a train bound
for the Russian front.
570
00:23:18,312 --> 00:23:19,856
Stalag 13.
571
00:23:19,897 --> 00:23:22,942
The Russian front.
572
00:23:22,984 --> 00:23:27,238
When Hogan says something,
Waffy, dear, believe him.
573
00:23:27,280 --> 00:23:29,282
Stalag 13?
574
00:23:41,294 --> 00:23:42,837
Rise and shine,
commandant,
575
00:23:42,879 --> 00:23:43,880
we're here.
Hmm?
576
00:23:43,921 --> 00:23:45,131
Hmm, we're... we're here?
577
00:23:45,173 --> 00:23:46,674
Yeah... the rest
of the commandos
578
00:23:46,674 --> 00:23:47,800
are already
off the train.
579
00:23:48,217 --> 00:23:49,510
Commandos?
580
00:23:49,510 --> 00:23:50,470
Klink's Commandos.
581
00:23:50,511 --> 00:23:52,513
Oh...
582
00:23:52,555 --> 00:23:54,432
Oh, it's terribly cold.
583
00:23:54,474 --> 00:23:55,433
Yeah, brisk, sir.
584
00:23:55,475 --> 00:23:57,018
Oh, thank you, Hogan.
585
00:23:57,059 --> 00:23:59,270
You know, Hogan,
I just want to say,
586
00:23:59,312 --> 00:24:00,938
despite our
little differences,
587
00:24:00,980 --> 00:24:04,358
I've always regarded you
as a kindred spirit.
588
00:24:04,358 --> 00:24:06,611
"Kindred spirit"... it's
very decent of you, sir.
589
00:24:06,652 --> 00:24:10,573
And, you know, when this
is over and we should meet
590
00:24:10,615 --> 00:24:13,868
on that great
parade ground in the sky,
591
00:24:13,910 --> 00:24:15,620
just call me Wilhelm.
592
00:24:15,703 --> 00:24:17,121
Well, thank you.
593
00:24:17,163 --> 00:24:19,457
And I know what
a great disappointment
594
00:24:19,499 --> 00:24:20,708
this is to you.
595
00:24:20,750 --> 00:24:21,542
Disappointment?
596
00:24:21,542 --> 00:24:23,169
It's a disaster!
597
00:24:23,211 --> 00:24:25,046
No, no, I mean the
mission being called off.
598
00:24:25,046 --> 00:24:26,047
Called off?
599
00:24:26,047 --> 00:24:27,131
Yeah, change
of orders.
600
00:24:27,173 --> 00:24:28,216
I thought
you heard.
601
00:24:28,216 --> 00:24:29,300
But where are we?
602
00:24:29,342 --> 00:24:31,761
At the station
near Stalag 13.
603
00:24:31,802 --> 00:24:33,554
Stalag 13?!
604
00:24:38,434 --> 00:24:39,560
Tough break, Wilhelm.
605
00:24:42,730 --> 00:24:43,606
"Wilhelm"?
606
00:24:43,648 --> 00:24:46,734
Commandant Klink,
Hogan.
607
00:24:46,734 --> 00:24:48,569
Yeah, good
to be home again.
41640
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