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[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
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Welcome back to
Play of the Week,
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00:00:17,643 --> 00:00:19,978
where each week
a play is performed live
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00:00:19,978 --> 00:00:22,689
in front of a studio audience,
here in Cornley
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00:00:22,689 --> 00:00:24,858
and broadcast to the nation.
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00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:29,154
I am Chris Bean,
the director.
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00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:30,822
Following
a number of complaints,
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00:00:30,822 --> 00:00:32,824
we have combed through
this week's script
9
00:00:32,824 --> 00:00:34,743
for any offensive language.
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00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:37,037
One character
in particular, Buddy,
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00:00:37,037 --> 00:00:39,498
does use rather a lot of
gruff vocabulary,
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00:00:39,498 --> 00:00:42,251
or as my mother would put it,
"Scottish language,"
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00:00:42,251 --> 00:00:44,378
which will be
censored throughout.
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00:00:44,378 --> 00:00:48,507
Also, unusually, this week,
we have hit a minor snag.
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00:00:48,507 --> 00:00:50,342
Tonight's American play
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00:00:50,342 --> 00:00:52,177
is entitled "90 Degrees"
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00:00:52,177 --> 00:00:54,471
in relation to
the Tennessee heat.
18
00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:57,683
Unfortunately,
when the set builders
saw 90 degrees
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00:00:57,683 --> 00:00:58,934
written on their
technical drawing,
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00:00:58,934 --> 00:01:02,104
they took it to mean
build parts of the set...
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00:01:02,104 --> 00:01:04,731
You'll immediately see
what they've done,
to be honest.
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00:01:04,731 --> 00:01:07,150
But do not fear,
we have corrected the issue
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00:01:07,150 --> 00:01:09,569
by repositioning the cameras.
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00:01:09,569 --> 00:01:12,155
So, the actors are prepared,
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00:01:12,155 --> 00:01:15,450
the stage is,
in some sense, set.
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00:01:16,576 --> 00:01:19,538
Please enjoy 90 Degrees.
27
00:01:41,018 --> 00:01:42,978
Give it to me straight, Larry.
28
00:01:42,978 --> 00:01:44,980
How long does your daddy
got to live?
29
00:01:44,980 --> 00:01:47,774
Daddy gets more sick
each sunrise.
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00:01:47,774 --> 00:01:51,194
The doc says we ought to
prepare for the worst.
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00:01:51,194 --> 00:01:52,904
Said I wasn't going to cry.
Damn it!
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00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:57,617
That's mighty fine work
looking after
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00:01:57,617 --> 00:01:59,411
that old man
all by yourself, Larry.
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00:01:59,411 --> 00:02:01,163
Yeah, it's not just me.
35
00:02:01,163 --> 00:02:03,707
Ol' Neighbor Joe
is always passing through.
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00:02:03,707 --> 00:02:05,334
-Morning!
-[CRASHES]
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00:02:06,585 --> 00:02:08,962
[BOTH] Morning, Joe!
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00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:12,466
Well, your daddy
is lucky to have you around.
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00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:13,675
Thank you, Mr. Pines.
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00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:17,054
Wow! It sure is...
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00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:21,308
Sure is hot today.
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[CHUCKLES]
It's 90 degrees outside.
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00:02:25,437 --> 00:02:27,022
It's 90 degrees in here too.
44
00:02:28,732 --> 00:02:30,901
-Can you feel it?
-I sure can.
45
00:02:32,527 --> 00:02:34,863
Perhaps I can pour you
some ice tea.
46
00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:38,200
Please!
47
00:02:52,839 --> 00:02:53,840
Thank you.
48
00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:02,099
It's good stuff.
49
00:03:02,933 --> 00:03:04,518
Melinda made it.
50
00:03:04,518 --> 00:03:06,561
Almost as good as
your mommy used to make.
51
00:03:06,561 --> 00:03:09,147
Ah, I sure wish
she was here now.
52
00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:11,441
She'd know just
what to say to Pa.
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00:03:11,441 --> 00:03:13,860
-Sugar?
-Yes, please. [CHUCKLES]
54
00:03:13,860 --> 00:03:15,862
[BOTH SCREAMING]
55
00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:17,864
Always did have a sweet tooth.
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00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:20,575
Can I get you some more ice?
57
00:03:20,575 --> 00:03:21,952
Just a couple of cubes.
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00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:27,958
Well, you sure
drank that fast.
59
00:03:27,958 --> 00:03:29,960
[CHUCKLES]
Can I get you a refill?
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00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:32,587
[STERNLY] No!
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00:03:32,587 --> 00:03:35,841
You know, my brother
and sister will be arriving
anytime now
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00:03:35,841 --> 00:03:37,759
and I just can't wait
to see 'em.
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00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:39,344
Don't be so naive, Larry.
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00:03:39,344 --> 00:03:41,471
There's only one damn reason
they're coming back.
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00:03:41,471 --> 00:03:44,141
I am not naive, Mr. Pines.
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00:03:44,141 --> 00:03:46,393
Buddy and Barbara
are good people!
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00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:47,519
BOTH: Whoa!
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00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:50,480
[DOORBELL CHIMING]
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00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,691
If you'll excuse me,
Mr. Pines.
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00:04:06,997 --> 00:04:09,040
I'll be right back, Mr. Pines.
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00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:10,167
Take your time.
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[LARRY GRUNTS]
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[LARRY GRUNTS]
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LARRY: Whoa!
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00:04:44,409 --> 00:04:46,536
[GRUNTING]
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00:04:46,536 --> 00:04:49,331
-Who is it, Melinda?
-It's Ms. Barbara.
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00:04:49,331 --> 00:04:50,457
No, Carl.
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00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:52,542
I need you to tell the buyers
to relax
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00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:55,212
and sign
the damned contracts today.
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00:04:55,212 --> 00:04:56,630
Real good to see you, Barb.
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00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:58,673
I don't care
if there are layoffs, Carl.
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00:04:58,673 --> 00:04:59,966
I care about profits.
83
00:05:02,511 --> 00:05:04,888
Larry, it's been a while.
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00:05:04,888 --> 00:05:06,556
Five years, Barb.
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00:05:06,556 --> 00:05:09,476
Yet, not a day
seems to have passed in here.
86
00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:11,561
Do you want to say hello
to Ruffles?
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00:05:11,561 --> 00:05:14,022
Don't tell me that mangy dog
is still alive.
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00:05:14,022 --> 00:05:15,232
Ruffles. [WHISTLES]
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00:05:15,232 --> 00:05:16,983
Come on and say hello
to Barbara.
90
00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:18,109
Ooh.
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00:05:19,361 --> 00:05:21,738
Uh, he's a few years older,
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00:05:21,738 --> 00:05:25,033
but he still loves
to run around.
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00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:31,206
RUFFLES: Woof.
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00:05:33,833 --> 00:05:35,710
Ruffles, sit.
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00:05:36,628 --> 00:05:40,090
[WHIRRING]
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00:05:46,054 --> 00:05:47,180
Lie down.
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00:05:48,390 --> 00:05:49,474
Look, lie down.
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00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:01,361
RUFFLES: Woof.
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00:06:02,445 --> 00:06:04,990
-Good boy.
-[CAR HONKS]
100
00:06:04,990 --> 00:06:06,533
That'll be our little brother.
101
00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:09,244
And his money-grabbing
city gal.
102
00:06:09,244 --> 00:06:11,997
Ugh, Melinda, please be civil.
103
00:06:11,997 --> 00:06:14,249
Rene is Buddy's wife now.
104
00:06:14,249 --> 00:06:16,876
Yeah, she sure got
her hooks in deep.
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00:06:16,876 --> 00:06:18,628
Ah, Buddy, Rene.
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00:06:18,628 --> 00:06:21,381
Oh, hello there, Larry.
[CHUCKLES MEEKLY]
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00:06:23,466 --> 00:06:25,510
Buddy, good to see ya.
108
00:06:25,510 --> 00:06:28,305
Ooh! Honey, you weren't kidding.
109
00:06:28,305 --> 00:06:30,599
It is something quaint.
110
00:06:30,599 --> 00:06:32,392
Daddy's in his room.
111
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:36,813
Now, before you see him,
I must warn you,
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00:06:36,813 --> 00:06:37,939
he's in a bad way.
113
00:06:38,982 --> 00:06:41,401
Oh, Barb, please don't cry.
114
00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:42,861
I'm sorry, Larry, it's just...
115
00:06:44,988 --> 00:06:46,072
It's just so sad.
116
00:06:52,162 --> 00:06:53,622
Come on, Barb!
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00:06:54,122 --> 00:06:55,206
Cut the crap!
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[BLEEP]
119
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Easy, Buddy. You okay?
120
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:01,880
Of course I'm not!
121
00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:05,300
I was the quarterback
for the Tennessee Bears!
122
00:07:05,300 --> 00:07:08,595
One bad tackle,
I break both my legs.
123
00:07:08,595 --> 00:07:10,472
Now, I'm stuck in this chair.
124
00:07:13,224 --> 00:07:15,143
Okay, Buddy, calm down.
125
00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:17,103
How about a nice cool beer?
126
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:18,313
Sure.
127
00:07:19,648 --> 00:07:20,690
[BUDDY SCREAMS]
128
00:07:24,361 --> 00:07:25,862
[BUDDY GRUNTS]
129
00:07:28,615 --> 00:07:32,202
I'm starving too.
You got snacks, right?
130
00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:34,621
Can't you think
about something
other than your belly?
131
00:07:34,621 --> 00:07:37,040
Anything to stop me thinking
about my legs.
132
00:07:40,210 --> 00:07:43,546
You ain't even asked
about your pops yet.
133
00:07:43,546 --> 00:07:46,132
How long does he have left?
134
00:07:46,132 --> 00:07:48,802
Doc says
it could be any day now.
135
00:07:48,802 --> 00:07:51,221
At least he won't have to
put up with any more of this...
136
00:07:51,221 --> 00:07:52,222
[BLEEP]
137
00:07:52,847 --> 00:07:54,516
...crap.
138
00:07:54,516 --> 00:07:56,810
RUFFLES: Woof, bark, growl.
Woof, bark, growl.
139
00:07:56,810 --> 00:07:59,187
-Woof.
-What's your little dog doin'?
140
00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:02,440
-Oh!
-Don't mind him.
He's real friendly.
141
00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:04,192
RUFFLES: Wag, wag, wag.
142
00:08:04,192 --> 00:08:06,569
CHRIS OVER SPEAKER:
Don't say "wag,"
just press the button.
143
00:08:06,569 --> 00:08:08,780
ROBERT: Which button?
CHRIS: The button
right in front of you.
144
00:08:08,780 --> 00:08:09,906
-[MAN GRUNTS]
-[MOTOR WHIRRING]
145
00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:14,119
Got it.
146
00:08:14,119 --> 00:08:17,372
Will someone please control
this animal?
147
00:08:17,372 --> 00:08:19,124
Go into the study, boy.
148
00:08:19,124 --> 00:08:23,586
RUFFLES: Fine!
It's not easy being
a dog, you know?
149
00:08:23,586 --> 00:08:24,879
CHRIS OVER SPEAKER:
You're supposed to be
doing dog noises.
150
00:08:24,879 --> 00:08:26,172
You can't give it lines.
151
00:08:26,172 --> 00:08:27,465
ROBERT:
It's an inner monologue.
152
00:08:27,465 --> 00:08:29,467
CHRIS: Then why are you
saying it out loud?
153
00:08:29,467 --> 00:08:30,844
This is a naturalistic piece.
154
00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:32,137
ROBERT: Nothing natural
about it, Chris.
155
00:08:32,137 --> 00:08:33,596
They built the set sideways.
156
00:08:34,472 --> 00:08:36,141
CHRIS: Just do a bark.
157
00:08:36,141 --> 00:08:37,392
ROBERT: This is
your fault, Chris.
Trying to cut costs,
158
00:08:37,392 --> 00:08:39,477
getting Dennis's dad
to do the sets.
159
00:08:39,477 --> 00:08:41,646
Then you got that toymaker
to do all the furniture.
160
00:08:41,646 --> 00:08:45,066
He's never done
anything other than
jack-in-the-boxes before.
161
00:08:45,066 --> 00:08:47,736
CHRIS: Just do a dog noise.
Do a dog noise!
162
00:08:50,113 --> 00:08:51,156
ROBERT: No.
163
00:08:52,782 --> 00:08:54,451
Go into the study, boy.
164
00:08:54,451 --> 00:09:00,248
[CHRIS AND ROBERT
ARGUING INDISTINCTLY
OVER SPEAKER]
165
00:09:00,248 --> 00:09:03,209
ROBERT:
Chris, what a disaster.
166
00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:05,295
ROBERT AS RUFFLES:
Get your hands off me,
you fiend.
167
00:09:07,630 --> 00:09:09,799
ROBERT: Press the button.
CHRIS: Oh, you idiot!
168
00:09:09,799 --> 00:09:15,805
[ARGUMENT CONTINUES
INDISTINCTLY]
169
00:09:19,225 --> 00:09:20,351
CHRIS: Stay out of my way.
170
00:09:20,351 --> 00:09:22,771
I am executing
a three-point turn.
171
00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:25,482
ROBERT: Chris, look at
the state of that.
172
00:09:25,482 --> 00:09:27,692
CHRIS: Will you stop
interfering with me?
173
00:09:27,692 --> 00:09:31,279
You did that, it's your fault!
174
00:09:31,279 --> 00:09:33,198
I am exiting the scene.
175
00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:42,040
ROBERT:
That was not naturalistic.
176
00:09:42,916 --> 00:09:45,043
Ah, Mr. Pines.
177
00:09:45,043 --> 00:09:48,087
ROBERT: Wait! Wait, wait,
wait, wait.
178
00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:49,130
Wait!
179
00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:53,843
Ah, Mr. Pines!
180
00:09:53,843 --> 00:09:56,095
[RONALD GRUNTS]
181
00:09:58,473 --> 00:09:59,641
Woof... I mean...
182
00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:04,521
I'm sorry. I don't believe
we've met before.
183
00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:07,941
Oh, this is Ronald Pines,
the family lawyer.
184
00:10:07,941 --> 00:10:10,068
Your dad has asked me
to speak to y'all
on his behalf
185
00:10:10,068 --> 00:10:11,903
since his condition
has worsened.
186
00:10:11,903 --> 00:10:13,988
If you'll all be so kind
as to join me
187
00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:15,073
in the study.
188
00:10:23,998 --> 00:10:26,292
It's a pleasure
to see you again,
Ms. Barbara.
189
00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:28,753
It's nice to have the family
back under one roof.
190
00:10:28,753 --> 00:10:33,091
Would be if it wasn't for
that Yankee jezebel
in our midst.
191
00:10:33,091 --> 00:10:35,802
Now, now, Melinda,
you forget your place.
192
00:10:35,802 --> 00:10:38,263
She does not have
Buddy's best interest
at heart.
193
00:10:38,263 --> 00:10:41,307
You can see clear as day
she has eyes for another.
194
00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:44,602
No, no, Melinda.
There's nothing
between Larry and Rene.
195
00:10:44,602 --> 00:10:47,730
No, I didn't say nothing
about Larry, did I?
196
00:10:47,730 --> 00:10:50,817
Excuse me, Ms. Barbara,
I must get back to my chores.
197
00:10:55,572 --> 00:10:57,657
Pleasure to see you again,
Ms. Barbara.
198
00:10:57,657 --> 00:10:59,826
It's nice to have the family
back under one roof!
199
00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:03,580
It would be if it wasn't
for that Yankee Jessabelle
in our midst.
200
00:11:03,580 --> 00:11:06,040
Now, now, Melinda,
you forget your place.
201
00:11:06,040 --> 00:11:08,251
She does not have
Buddy's best interests
at heart.
202
00:11:08,251 --> 00:11:10,587
You can see it clear as day,
she has eyes for another.
203
00:11:10,587 --> 00:11:12,422
[SCOFFS] Now, now, Melinda.
204
00:11:12,422 --> 00:11:14,007
There's nothing
between Larry and Rene.
205
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:17,468
No, I didn't say nothing
about Larry, did I?
206
00:11:17,468 --> 00:11:21,139
Excuse me, Ms. Barbara.
I must get back to my chores.
207
00:11:31,149 --> 00:11:32,191
RONALD: Thank you, Barbara.
208
00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:43,786
Welcome, everyone.
209
00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:48,458
Now, I'm aware this may be
an uncomfortable meeting.
210
00:11:48,458 --> 00:11:51,836
But first, I need you all
to sign a copy
211
00:11:52,754 --> 00:11:54,339
of these documents.
212
00:11:54,339 --> 00:11:55,423
Oh, oh!
213
00:11:57,467 --> 00:11:59,010
Now, before Mr. Burgess...
214
00:11:59,010 --> 00:12:00,136
-Whoa!
-[BARBARA SHRIEKS]
215
00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:04,974
...finalizes his will,
216
00:12:04,974 --> 00:12:07,185
by a show of hands,
which of you would intend to
217
00:12:07,185 --> 00:12:09,437
sell your share
in Burgess Fine Tea
218
00:12:09,437 --> 00:12:10,980
after your father has passed?
219
00:12:11,689 --> 00:12:12,690
Barbara.
220
00:12:15,151 --> 00:12:16,235
Buddy?
221
00:12:21,491 --> 00:12:22,825
There it is.
222
00:12:22,825 --> 00:12:24,827
Shame on the two of you.
223
00:12:24,827 --> 00:12:27,163
How could you think of
doing that to the workers?
224
00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:28,831
[BLEEP]
225
00:12:28,831 --> 00:12:32,961
-Oh!
-Buddy, I do wish you wouldn't
use that kind of language.
226
00:12:32,961 --> 00:12:35,004
Can you blame him
for being angry?
227
00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:37,340
He's stuck in that chair
for life.
228
00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:42,595
All right,
everybody settle down.
229
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:44,013
You're upsetting Ruffles.
230
00:12:45,473 --> 00:12:47,100
-RONALD: Woof.
-Come here, boy.
231
00:12:48,476 --> 00:12:50,144
[RONALD IMITATING BARKS]
232
00:12:51,521 --> 00:12:53,690
Good boy.
233
00:12:53,690 --> 00:12:56,859
Mr. Burgess has made it clear
he does not want...
234
00:12:56,859 --> 00:12:59,487
Mr. Burgess has made it clear
235
00:12:59,487 --> 00:13:02,573
he does not want
the business to be sold.
236
00:13:02,573 --> 00:13:05,493
So, it seems,
Burgess Fine Tea
237
00:13:05,493 --> 00:13:08,496
must be inherited
by Larry alone.
238
00:13:08,496 --> 00:13:10,331
Larry alone?
239
00:13:10,331 --> 00:13:13,209
All right. We all
just need to cool down.
240
00:13:13,209 --> 00:13:16,462
Uh, Melinda, bring us
some more of that ice tea.
241
00:13:16,462 --> 00:13:19,048
MELINDA: [GRUNTS]
Yes, Mr. Larry.
242
00:13:26,723 --> 00:13:28,725
MELINDA: Oh! Oh!
243
00:13:30,435 --> 00:13:32,186
There you go.
244
00:13:33,896 --> 00:13:36,274
I'm gonna need
something stronger than that.
245
00:13:36,274 --> 00:13:39,736
Melinda, fetch us some beer
from the refrigerator.
246
00:13:40,862 --> 00:13:41,863
MELINDA: [WHISPERS] Okay.
247
00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:45,033
Oh, yes, Mr. Larry. [GRUNTS]
248
00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:48,453
Barb, Barb.
249
00:13:48,453 --> 00:13:50,079
MELINDA: Ooh! Okay.
250
00:13:50,079 --> 00:13:52,165
Mr. Pines. Mr. Pines!
251
00:13:52,623 --> 00:13:54,834
Oh! Rene.
252
00:13:54,834 --> 00:13:55,918
Rene!
253
00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:00,173
Rene!
254
00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:01,174
Rene!
255
00:14:04,927 --> 00:14:07,138
-Rene!
-No!
256
00:14:07,138 --> 00:14:09,057
-Rene!
-[RENE SHRIEKS]
257
00:14:09,057 --> 00:14:10,600
Rene, you really need to...
258
00:14:12,477 --> 00:14:13,603
Rene, harder!
259
00:14:20,943 --> 00:14:22,153
[MELINDA GRUNTS]
260
00:14:22,153 --> 00:14:24,072
If you need me, Mr. Larry...
261
00:14:24,072 --> 00:14:26,115
[SHRIEKS] Oh, no!
262
00:14:26,115 --> 00:14:27,158
I'll be... Oh! Whoa!
263
00:14:28,326 --> 00:14:30,119
Oh! There go my bosoms.
264
00:14:32,455 --> 00:14:36,667
If you need me, Mr. Larry,
I'll be in the kitchen.
265
00:14:37,418 --> 00:14:38,503
[SCREAMS]
266
00:14:40,838 --> 00:14:43,674
How is it fair
that Larry gets it all?
267
00:14:43,674 --> 00:14:45,843
[BLEEP]
268
00:14:45,843 --> 00:14:50,264
Come on, Buddy.
You're just talking
out your ass.
269
00:14:50,264 --> 00:14:52,934
Settle down, all of ya,
and drink your beers.
270
00:14:55,103 --> 00:14:57,313
Ah, nothing like
some cool sips
271
00:14:57,313 --> 00:14:58,439
on a hot day.
272
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:03,236
Perhaps Pines is right.
He should brew beers.
273
00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:06,739
[BLEEP]
274
00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:10,535
All right. We all
just need to be civil
to one another.
275
00:15:10,535 --> 00:15:12,286
Buddy always gets snippy
276
00:15:12,286 --> 00:15:14,747
when he's been drinking
on an empty stomach.
277
00:15:14,747 --> 00:15:16,249
Oh, we could deal with that.
278
00:15:16,249 --> 00:15:17,375
Uh, Melinda,
279
00:15:17,375 --> 00:15:19,961
bring us some of that
fine gazpacho.
280
00:15:20,628 --> 00:15:22,296
MELINDA: Yes, Mr. Larry.
281
00:15:22,296 --> 00:15:23,589
[ALL SHRIEKING]
282
00:15:25,091 --> 00:15:26,217
MELINDA: Enjoy!
283
00:15:26,217 --> 00:15:28,302
Mmm...
284
00:15:28,302 --> 00:15:31,222
Well, if you're still hungry
after that,
285
00:15:31,222 --> 00:15:34,016
Ol' Neighbor Joe
usually passes by
286
00:15:34,016 --> 00:15:35,768
with something sweet
about now.
287
00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:39,188
Howdy.
288
00:15:39,188 --> 00:15:42,233
Who'd like a slice
of my blueberry pie?
289
00:15:42,233 --> 00:15:43,359
-Oh!
-[CRASHES]
290
00:15:47,238 --> 00:15:48,948
Buddy?
291
00:15:48,948 --> 00:15:50,992
Why don't you take
five minutes in the kitchen?
292
00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:55,788
What you must understand is,
293
00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:59,876
Mr. Burgess has the interest
of his workers at heart.
294
00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:02,712
Barb, I know that
you're not happy...
295
00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:06,090
I know you're not happy
with Daddy's decision,
296
00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:07,800
but, as his children,
297
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:09,468
we must respect his wishes.
298
00:16:09,468 --> 00:16:11,179
RONALD: Absolutely agreed!
299
00:16:11,179 --> 00:16:14,348
Now, I know Buddy can be
300
00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:17,518
a different...
[MUFFLED SPEAKING]
301
00:16:19,729 --> 00:16:21,355
BARBARA: Excuse me, Mr. Pines,
302
00:16:21,355 --> 00:16:23,441
may I speak with you
in the living room?
303
00:16:23,441 --> 00:16:24,650
Of course.
304
00:16:24,650 --> 00:16:25,693
After you.
305
00:16:47,798 --> 00:16:49,967
[GRUNTING]
306
00:16:50,509 --> 00:16:52,762
[PANTING]
307
00:16:52,762 --> 00:16:54,263
I'll be back momentarily.
308
00:17:08,653 --> 00:17:10,363
-Excuse me.
-[CRASHES]
309
00:17:13,824 --> 00:17:17,036
Oh, Larry, I thought
they'd never leave us alone.
310
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:18,621
I don't know what
you're talking about, Rene.
311
00:17:18,621 --> 00:17:21,165
I'm talking about
you and I, Larry.
312
00:17:21,165 --> 00:17:22,917
The chemistry between us.
313
00:17:22,917 --> 00:17:24,627
Keep your voice down.
314
00:17:24,627 --> 00:17:25,878
That was one night of weakness
315
00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:27,421
and I've regretted it
ever since.
316
00:17:27,421 --> 00:17:29,715
Don't pretend
you don't want to
kiss me, Larry,
317
00:17:29,715 --> 00:17:32,718
right here on this table.
318
00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:41,227
BOTH: Whoa!
319
00:17:42,937 --> 00:17:45,398
LARRY: All right.
Careful, careful.
320
00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:46,983
RENE: Kiss me, Larry!
321
00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:48,985
[RENE SCREAMING]
322
00:17:48,985 --> 00:17:50,319
Oh, Larry!
323
00:17:50,319 --> 00:17:53,072
You've got
such a gentle touch.
324
00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:54,365
Rene!
325
00:17:54,365 --> 00:17:58,786
[BOTH SCREAMING AND SHRIEKING]
326
00:17:59,912 --> 00:18:01,497
Keep your voice down.
327
00:18:01,497 --> 00:18:04,417
-Someone might hear us.
-RENE: Larry!
328
00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,711
What the Sam hell
is going on in here?
329
00:18:06,711 --> 00:18:08,421
LARRY: Barbara, this is not
what it looks like.
330
00:18:10,172 --> 00:18:12,216
BARBARA: You have no idea
what it looks like.
331
00:18:12,216 --> 00:18:14,176
-[LARRY SCREAMS]
-[THUDS]
332
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:18,597
I cannot believe
a brother of mine
333
00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:21,559
would engage in such under...
334
00:18:21,559 --> 00:18:22,893
[LARRY GRUNTS]
335
00:18:22,893 --> 00:18:24,770
Get out of there, Larry.
336
00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:26,147
All right.
337
00:18:26,147 --> 00:18:27,398
Whoa!
338
00:18:36,657 --> 00:18:38,200
[LARRY GRUNTS]
339
00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:39,410
[LARRY GROANS]
340
00:18:41,871 --> 00:18:43,247
LARRY: Help me, help me.
341
00:18:43,789 --> 00:18:45,458
[LARRY GROANS]
342
00:18:52,340 --> 00:18:55,509
Please, Barb,
don't tell anyone
what you just saw.
343
00:18:55,509 --> 00:18:59,472
Well, seems I have you
over a barrel.
344
00:18:59,472 --> 00:19:02,266
I can't let Buddy find out.
It'll kill him!
345
00:19:02,266 --> 00:19:04,060
I'm not gonna tell Buddy.
346
00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:05,853
[SIGHS IN RELIEF]
Thank you, Barbara.
347
00:19:05,853 --> 00:19:07,646
As long as you give me
the business.
348
00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:11,609
I can't do that.
I promised Pa!
349
00:19:11,609 --> 00:19:15,988
-ROBERT AS RUFFLES: Growl.
-Easy. Easy, Ruffles.
350
00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:18,199
ROBERT AS RUFFLES:
She's trying to
blackmail you, Larry.
351
00:19:18,199 --> 00:19:19,992
CHRIS: Stop improvising!
352
00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:21,619
That is it.
Give me the remote.
You're not playing the dog.
353
00:19:21,619 --> 00:19:23,037
ROBERT: Stop it.
CHRIS: Give it to me!
354
00:19:23,037 --> 00:19:25,623
-ROBERT: I am doing it!
-[THUDS]
355
00:19:27,458 --> 00:19:29,585
CHRIS: Get out!
ROBERT: Fine, I'm going
to the canteen.
356
00:19:29,585 --> 00:19:31,587
[CLEARS THROAT]
It's real simple, Larry.
357
00:19:32,421 --> 00:19:34,673
You give me the company
358
00:19:34,673 --> 00:19:37,968
and I don't tell Buddy
your dirty little secret.
359
00:19:37,968 --> 00:19:40,137
What happened to us, Barb?
360
00:19:40,137 --> 00:19:42,473
Why can't we all be
more like Ruffles?
361
00:19:42,473 --> 00:19:43,849
He don't ask for nothing.
362
00:19:43,849 --> 00:19:45,267
ROBERT OVER SPEAKER:
Packet of wine gums, please?
363
00:19:49,563 --> 00:19:51,857
-He ain't greedy.
-ROBERT: Family size, please.
364
00:19:54,151 --> 00:19:56,362
And he don't care about money.
365
00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:58,948
-[CASH REGISTER DINGS]
-ROBERT: £3.49?
366
00:19:58,948 --> 00:20:00,157
What is this, the cinema?
367
00:20:00,157 --> 00:20:01,492
Absolutely not.
I'll put them back.
368
00:20:01,492 --> 00:20:03,452
[PLASTIC CRINKLING]
369
00:20:03,452 --> 00:20:05,287
SHOPKEEPER: Excuse me, sir,
what have you just put
in your trousers?
370
00:20:05,287 --> 00:20:07,373
-ROBERT: Nothing...
-SHOPKEEPER: Give me
the wine gums.
371
00:20:07,373 --> 00:20:08,666
RONALD: No, no, I just...
372
00:20:08,666 --> 00:20:11,460
No, no, please!
373
00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:15,423
ROBERT: Look over there!
[SCREAMING]
374
00:20:15,423 --> 00:20:16,549
SHOPKEEPER: Get back here!
375
00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:19,718
[ROBERT PANTING]
376
00:20:21,429 --> 00:20:23,180
ROBERT: All right.
I think I lost him.
377
00:20:23,180 --> 00:20:25,433
[PANTING]
378
00:20:25,433 --> 00:20:26,475
Where am I?
379
00:20:27,476 --> 00:20:28,519
I'm lost.
380
00:20:29,979 --> 00:20:31,313
Ah, should be safe in here.
381
00:20:44,743 --> 00:20:46,579
[EXHALES]
382
00:20:52,126 --> 00:20:55,254
-[EXHALES]
-[PLASTIC WRAPPER CRUMPLING]
383
00:21:09,768 --> 00:21:10,811
Excuse me.
384
00:21:14,732 --> 00:21:16,734
-Larry!
-Buddy.
385
00:21:16,734 --> 00:21:18,944
I've just been
talking to Pa.
386
00:21:18,944 --> 00:21:21,030
You really are a no good...
387
00:21:21,030 --> 00:21:23,115
[BLEEP] Crap.
388
00:21:24,241 --> 00:21:25,868
Take it easy, Buddy.
389
00:21:25,868 --> 00:21:28,537
I didn't know
Pa was going to
leave me in-charge.
390
00:21:28,537 --> 00:21:31,123
Well, you better go
change his mind.
391
00:21:31,123 --> 00:21:34,418
-I'm gonna go
pay my respects.
-I'm comin' with you.
392
00:21:35,336 --> 00:21:36,378
LARRY: Oh, no.
393
00:21:40,633 --> 00:21:41,759
RENE: Buddy!
394
00:21:42,843 --> 00:21:43,928
BUDDY: Rene.
395
00:21:45,721 --> 00:21:47,223
Are you all right?
396
00:21:47,223 --> 00:21:48,724
Why are you
looking at me like that?
397
00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:51,519
Oh, it's just the heat.
[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]
398
00:21:51,519 --> 00:21:53,145
Pass me that beer, would you?
399
00:21:55,689 --> 00:21:56,732
What?
400
00:21:58,234 --> 00:22:00,236
I said pass me that beer,
would you?
401
00:22:14,333 --> 00:22:15,459
The bear.
402
00:22:17,628 --> 00:22:19,588
No, not the bear.
403
00:22:21,006 --> 00:22:22,007
The beer.
404
00:22:23,717 --> 00:22:25,135
The bear!
405
00:22:26,262 --> 00:22:28,055
No, not the bear.
406
00:22:28,430 --> 00:22:29,723
The beer.
407
00:22:29,723 --> 00:22:31,892
No, no, that's the bear.
Put that down.
408
00:22:33,018 --> 00:22:35,896
Pass me the beer.
409
00:22:37,356 --> 00:22:38,732
The bear!
410
00:22:38,732 --> 00:22:40,359
No, not the bear!
411
00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:41,777
The beer!
412
00:22:41,777 --> 00:22:43,237
The bear!
413
00:22:43,237 --> 00:22:45,239
Not the bear, the... The...
414
00:22:46,031 --> 00:22:47,783
The beer.
415
00:22:49,034 --> 00:22:51,662
-The bear!
-Not the bear, the beer!
416
00:22:51,662 --> 00:22:53,205
Oh!
417
00:22:53,664 --> 00:22:55,082
The beard!
418
00:22:55,082 --> 00:22:56,917
Not the beard, not the beard!
419
00:22:58,002 --> 00:23:00,004
Lager, lager beer. Lager?
420
00:23:00,004 --> 00:23:01,422
Larger bear!
421
00:23:01,422 --> 00:23:04,091
Oh! Larger bear!
422
00:23:04,091 --> 00:23:06,427
Here you go. A larger bear!
423
00:23:10,306 --> 00:23:11,307
Thank you.
424
00:23:14,101 --> 00:23:15,185
[IMITATES CAN OPENING SOUND]
425
00:23:19,815 --> 00:23:21,275
Cheers!
426
00:23:21,275 --> 00:23:23,360
Oh! [SHRIEKS]
427
00:23:32,494 --> 00:23:35,122
Papa! Oh, Papa, don't go.
428
00:23:35,122 --> 00:23:38,334
It's all right, Barb.
Everything's
gonna be all right.
429
00:23:38,334 --> 00:23:40,502
Doesn't look like
he can hold on much longer.
430
00:23:41,754 --> 00:23:43,047
[COUGHS]
431
00:23:43,047 --> 00:23:45,507
Oh, he's coughing.
Get him his pills.
432
00:23:49,720 --> 00:23:51,055
Here you go, Pa.
433
00:23:53,057 --> 00:23:54,141
Ah!
434
00:23:56,560 --> 00:23:59,188
-[BREATHING RAGGEDLY]
-Here's your oxygen, Pa.
435
00:24:02,107 --> 00:24:03,442
Here you go, Pa...
436
00:24:03,442 --> 00:24:06,528
[LARRY AND HERB SCREAMING]
437
00:24:09,114 --> 00:24:10,908
BARBARA: You got to
stay with us, Daddy.
438
00:24:10,908 --> 00:24:12,910
Ol' Neighbor Joe
just made you a pudding.
439
00:24:15,371 --> 00:24:17,665
This meringue
is lighter than air.
440
00:24:22,836 --> 00:24:26,465
I feel it's nearly time.
441
00:24:26,465 --> 00:24:29,259
Oh, Daddy,
you're making me cry.
442
00:24:29,718 --> 00:24:30,761
[MOANS]
443
00:24:35,099 --> 00:24:38,227
Look, Pa,
Ruffles has come
to say goodbye.
444
00:24:43,899 --> 00:24:45,901
Let me pet him
one last time.
445
00:24:49,697 --> 00:24:50,864
[THUDS]
446
00:24:53,033 --> 00:24:55,035
[HERB GROANING]
447
00:24:55,035 --> 00:24:58,038
-Careful, Papa.
-I think I'm going.
448
00:24:58,622 --> 00:24:59,790
I'm going.
449
00:24:59,790 --> 00:25:01,834
Hold on, Papa.
450
00:25:01,834 --> 00:25:04,920
I don't think I can hold on
much longer.
451
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:07,506
-I love you, Barbara.
-I love you, Daddy.
452
00:25:07,506 --> 00:25:10,968
-I love you, Larry.
-I love you, Pa.
453
00:25:10,968 --> 00:25:13,929
Goodbye, cruel world!
454
00:25:13,929 --> 00:25:15,180
[BARBARA SHRIEKS]
455
00:25:15,180 --> 00:25:17,683
[MACHINE BEEPING]
456
00:25:19,643 --> 00:25:21,437
Thanks, Melinda.
457
00:25:21,437 --> 00:25:22,521
MELINDA: Mmm.
458
00:25:24,857 --> 00:25:27,359
It's a shame
it had to work out this way.
459
00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:29,611
It's going to be
all right, Buddy.
460
00:25:29,611 --> 00:25:31,613
We don't need
Burgess' Fine Tea.
461
00:25:32,364 --> 00:25:33,907
We have each other.
462
00:25:33,907 --> 00:25:35,909
I just never catch a break.
463
00:25:35,909 --> 00:25:38,245
First my accident
and now this.
464
00:25:43,792 --> 00:25:45,002
[BUDDY SHRIEKS]
465
00:25:46,837 --> 00:25:50,257
Buddy, I ain't never seen you
cry like this before.
466
00:25:53,802 --> 00:25:55,596
Papa has passed.
467
00:25:55,596 --> 00:25:58,682
I'm so sorry.
I'll leave you all alone.
468
00:25:58,682 --> 00:26:02,019
Larry, if you want to
swing by my office
to go over the papers.
469
00:26:02,019 --> 00:26:06,732
You know, Buddy, I saw
the funniest thing
in the study this afternoon.
470
00:26:06,732 --> 00:26:08,484
Actually, Mr. Pines...
471
00:26:09,193 --> 00:26:10,694
I won't be stopping by.
472
00:26:11,487 --> 00:26:13,363
-You won't?
-No.
473
00:26:13,363 --> 00:26:15,866
I want to sign over
control of the company
474
00:26:17,201 --> 00:26:18,911
-to Barbara?
-What?
475
00:26:18,911 --> 00:26:20,245
To Barbara?
476
00:26:20,245 --> 00:26:23,040
If you have the papers,
I'll sign them now.
477
00:26:24,458 --> 00:26:27,252
Larry, are you sure?
478
00:26:28,462 --> 00:26:29,630
There's no other way.
479
00:26:31,465 --> 00:26:32,591
All right.
480
00:26:52,277 --> 00:26:53,278
Sign here.
481
00:26:56,031 --> 00:26:57,032
And here.
482
00:26:58,492 --> 00:26:59,535
And on the reverse.
483
00:27:03,038 --> 00:27:04,665
There.
484
00:27:04,665 --> 00:27:06,500
I'll have these papers filed
right away.
485
00:27:10,879 --> 00:27:12,172
Good day, y'all.
486
00:27:12,172 --> 00:27:14,424
MELINDA: I'll walk you
to your car, Mr. Pines.
487
00:27:14,424 --> 00:27:16,802
I can't believe
you've just done that.
488
00:27:16,802 --> 00:27:18,554
I've done it for you, Buddy.
489
00:27:18,554 --> 00:27:19,763
It's true.
490
00:27:19,763 --> 00:27:21,598
If Larry hadn't signed
those papers,
491
00:27:21,598 --> 00:27:24,059
I'd have told you all about
his affair with Rene.
492
00:27:24,059 --> 00:27:25,227
[RENE GASPS]
493
00:27:26,687 --> 00:27:29,064
Barbara, you've played me.
494
00:27:29,064 --> 00:27:31,650
-Like a game of craps.
-[BLEEP]
495
00:27:34,570 --> 00:27:38,282
Anyhow, I'd love to stay
and talk,
496
00:27:38,282 --> 00:27:41,410
but we have to get back
to Connecticut.
497
00:27:41,410 --> 00:27:43,412
Ain't that right, Rene?
498
00:27:45,914 --> 00:27:47,499
That's right, Barbara.
499
00:27:48,333 --> 00:27:50,043
Sorry, Buddy.
500
00:27:50,043 --> 00:27:53,213
Rene! How can you
do this to me?
501
00:27:53,213 --> 00:27:56,091
ROBERT AS RUFFLES:
Woof, woof, woof.
502
00:27:56,091 --> 00:27:58,176
- I've got some
thoughts on this.
-No, you don't!
503
00:27:59,636 --> 00:28:01,972
You two played me
from the start.
504
00:28:01,972 --> 00:28:04,016
Oh, sorry, Larry.
505
00:28:05,142 --> 00:28:06,268
Come on, sweetie.
506
00:28:07,644 --> 00:28:08,770
Let's get out of here.
507
00:28:10,564 --> 00:28:11,607
[DOOR OPENS]
508
00:28:13,108 --> 00:28:15,402
Buddy, I am so sorry.
509
00:28:16,445 --> 00:28:17,529
Pa is gone.
510
00:28:19,072 --> 00:28:20,782
There's nothing left
for us here.
511
00:28:28,790 --> 00:28:31,001
Buddy. Buddy, wait.
512
00:28:33,545 --> 00:28:39,092
Well, I guess it's just
you and me now, Ruffles.
513
00:28:39,092 --> 00:28:40,344
Indeed it is, Larry.
514
00:28:40,344 --> 00:28:43,221
And there is much
I need to say.
515
00:28:43,221 --> 00:28:44,681
-Why must...
-OFFICER: Excuse me, sir.
516
00:28:44,681 --> 00:28:46,141
Cornley Police.
Can I have a word?
517
00:28:46,141 --> 00:28:48,185
ROBERT: What?
518
00:28:48,185 --> 00:28:49,269
OFFICER: We've had
a report of a man matching
your description shoplifting.
519
00:28:49,269 --> 00:28:50,562
Would you
come with us, please?
520
00:28:50,562 --> 00:28:52,022
RONALD: It was Chris.
He told me to do it.
521
00:28:52,022 --> 00:28:53,732
CHRIS: Can we help you?
522
00:28:53,732 --> 00:28:55,233
OFFICER: Is this man
working under
your instructions, sir?
523
00:28:55,233 --> 00:28:56,693
CHRIS: Of course.
I'm the director.
524
00:28:56,693 --> 00:28:58,153
OFFICER: Right,
you're under arrest.
525
00:28:58,153 --> 00:29:00,280
CHRIS: Hey, what are you doing?
526
00:29:00,280 --> 00:29:01,698
ROBERT: Oh, microphone
is still on.
527
00:29:01,698 --> 00:29:03,492
Uh, the dog's dead.
528
00:29:05,869 --> 00:29:06,912
Ruffles?
529
00:29:07,704 --> 00:29:08,789
Ruffles?
530
00:29:09,414 --> 00:29:10,457
Ruffles, no!
531
00:29:11,375 --> 00:29:13,085
-[HORNS BLARING]
-[LARRY SHRIEKS]
532
00:29:15,045 --> 00:29:17,047
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
36759
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