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1
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Hey, I'm Kim, and I'm here
with Rob, Kourtney, and Khlo�,
2
00:00:12,245 --> 00:00:13,880
and we're bringing you
Junk in the Trunk.
3
00:00:13,947 --> 00:00:17,250
We have so many fun, outrageous clips
that you've never seen before.
4
00:00:17,617 --> 00:00:20,920
[singing] Junk in the Trunk'Cause Kim has junk in the trunk!
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00:00:21,221 --> 00:00:22,889
-[gasping, laughing] Kourtney...
-[Khlo�] Let me see...
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00:00:22,956 --> 00:00:24,858
What... She can't even get...
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00:00:25,258 --> 00:00:27,794
[Kris] Oh, my God, it's crack city.
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00:00:29,062 --> 00:00:29,929
[Kim] No.
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00:00:31,798 --> 00:00:33,700
Anyway, we have a ton of surprises,
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00:00:33,767 --> 00:00:35,668
and we're gonna give you
a sneak peek.
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00:00:35,735 --> 00:00:36,770
[all cheering]
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00:00:38,505 --> 00:00:41,307
Shut up right now and let me say
my five minutes of [bleep].
13
00:00:41,374 --> 00:00:42,876
Oh, my God!
14
00:00:42,942 --> 00:00:44,411
[shrieking]
15
00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:47,580
I wanna get just, like,
a stripper or something funny.
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00:00:47,647 --> 00:00:49,883
Oh, no, no, no! No! No!
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I am in need, obviously!
18
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Mwah! Mwah!
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-Who needs some help?
-[both] Oh!
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Seriously, shut the [bleep] up.
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-[cutlery rattling]
-I don't think so!
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Don't go anywhere. You don't wanna miss
our junk in our trunk.
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00:01:04,664 --> 00:01:05,765
-[Rob] Is that...
-"In the trunk."
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[both] Junk in the trunk!
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[singing] Junk in the trunk!
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-Holla.
-We're back.
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So, I'm sure you guys
have picked up on how our family
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-kind of disagrees...
-No.
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-We know how to fight.
-[Kourtney squeals]
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[laughing] Oh, my God.
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Remember Puerto Vallarta,
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and Rob was throwing that bitch fit
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because he couldn't get a car at 16?
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Oh, you little bitch.
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-Mom.
-[Khlo�] I hope so.
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What?
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[Rob] Like, I was thinking,
I wanna get a Maybach.
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[Kourtney] No way. He just got his car.
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-[all talking indistinctly]
-You said you wanted a navy Range Rover.
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-So we get you a navy Range Rover.
-[Rob] You did. You did.
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Rob, you seem like the biggest idiot
and the biggest brat ever.
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I'm not gonna listen to you guys
yell at me...
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-[Khlo�] No, because you're an idiot.
-And when you say I'm spoiled,
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-when you guys...
-Stop. You are spoiled.
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[Kourtney] Spoiled!
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No. Shut up right now and let me say
my five minutes of [bleep].
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-[Khlo�] OK, five minutes.
-[Kourtney] Five seconds.
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You got a car when you were 16,
you got a car when you were 16,
49
00:02:00,286 --> 00:02:01,788
and you got a car when you were 16.
50
00:02:01,855 --> 00:02:04,824
-I didn't get any car until I was 20.
-[Kris] Boo-hoo.
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00:02:04,891 --> 00:02:06,493
And I was two years into college.
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00:02:06,559 --> 00:02:08,361
I got into a really good school,
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00:02:08,428 --> 00:02:11,464
I graduated from school
with a really good GPA,
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00:02:11,531 --> 00:02:13,399
you guys didn't do any of that [bleep],
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-and I did.
-[girls] What?
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[Kim] You're saying
because I worked in Dad's office
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-that Dad paid for my car?
-Yes.
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[Kim] I worked. You don't even have a job.
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All you did was sit at a computer
and go on Myspace.
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-Whatever.
-Myspace wasn't even back then.
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-Rob, you are so... You, like...
-[all shouting]
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[Kim] You're being such a brat.
Just because I worked for Dad...
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-You don't give anyone credit.
-I worked there for seven years, Rob.
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-I got up every day...
-[Scott] Gonna need some drinks here.
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-[all shouting]
-[Rob] And I would've done...
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And if I was you,
I would've done the same exact thing.
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-[Kim] Where are you going?
-[Kris] Oh, you're gonna walk away, Rob?
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-[Kourtney] Are you done with us?
-[Khlo�] Let him walk away.
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Who the hell cares? Are you joking?
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-[Kourtney] OK.
-[Khlo�] Yeah, Rob.
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Big winner in that fight.
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Rob! Remember when
you slapped Adrienne in her face?
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How disrespectful was that one?
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Rob!
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Rob!
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Robert, that is disgusting
that you would ever do that.
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We were just pranking Mom.
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I was in on it.
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Ugh.
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00:03:00,313 --> 00:03:02,015
[speaking quietly]
You have to slap me hard, Rob.
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00:03:02,081 --> 00:03:04,017
I know you do not hit women,
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00:03:04,083 --> 00:03:05,818
but just think about me like if I was...
83
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I'll say you called off the wedding.
We were supposed to get married
84
00:03:08,021 --> 00:03:10,223
and then you call off the wedding,
you stupid bitch?
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Bap!
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-[Rob] Mom.
-Yo, I'm so... I'm like just gonna leave.
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I'm so sorry, Kris.
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-[Kris] What?
-[Adrienne] I'm gonna
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-talk to you guys later.
-What?
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00:03:18,298 --> 00:03:20,333
-[Rob] No, come back here, Adrienne.
-[Kris] Adrienne...
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You called off the [bleep] wedding
in India?
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-It's not that serious.
-No.
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-[Adrienne] Rob! Stop!
-[Khlo�] Why are you grabbing her?
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-[Rob] Cause she called off the wedding.
-Don't grab her.
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Rob!
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[gasps]
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[Adrienne] Rob!
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-[Khlo�] Why are you doing this?
-Robert!
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[Khlo�] You don't hit girls!
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[Rob] Mom, she called off the wedding.
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What is your [bleep]?
What is wrong with you?
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-She called off the wedding.
-[Khlo�] Mom, he just slapped her.
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Adrienne! Oh, my God,
I can't believe he just did that!
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Just stay out there.
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Rob, why would you do that to her?
Now she's hysterical.
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I can't even believe
she's standing in front of you right now.
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-Adrienne...
-[Khlo�] Where is she going?
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She doesn't have a license!
She can't drive!
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I'll take her someplace.
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-We're just kidding, Mom.
-No, you're not kidding!
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-We're just kidding.
-[Khlo�] This is a joke.
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We were just trying to see how,
if you really love her or not.
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I hate all of you! Oh, my God!
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-[Adrienne laughing] Sorry.
-Oh, honey.
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-You know, Rob, I swear...
-I'd never do that.
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-That was good.
-[Kris] You're nuts. You're all nuts!
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Good job, guys. It's a wrap.
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[girls whooping]
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[laughing]
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That is traumatizing.
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Definitely wouldn't have
gotten me, though.
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Nothing surprises me these days.
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-[Khlo�] Nothing surprises you?
-Nothing.
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-Nothing surprises you?
-Don't get that look on your face.
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-Nothing surprises you?
-Khlo�! Khlo�! [shrieking]
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[laughing] I'm gonna rip your hair off!
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Khlo�... Just because
you're 10 times my size...
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Don't take it out on me.
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[both giggling]
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Khlo�!
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-We're going out!
-Wait, don't! Khlo�!
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-[grunts]
-Don't start.
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[both grunting]
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[Bruce laughing] Wait a second.
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[laughing]
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[shrieking]
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-[screaming]
-This is sexual.
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[Khlo�] Ha ha ha!
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[laughing] I'm getting a rug burn.
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00:05:02,435 --> 00:05:03,503
Ow!
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00:05:04,103 --> 00:05:05,505
[laughing] I can't breathe!
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Just tell me you love me.
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-[laughing] I'm gonna...
-Tell me you love me.
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I'm gonna die.
145
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[Kourtney] Oh, my...
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-You guys, you're so annoying.
-[Kourtney shrieking]
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00:05:17,216 --> 00:05:18,184
-Can you stop?
-[Kourtney] Oh, my God!
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-[Rob] Watch out, it's glass.
-[Kim] Seriously, stop.
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At least we're not boring.
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-I'm not boring.
-[both] OK.
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00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:26,125
[gentle music playing]
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[yawning]
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00:05:32,932 --> 00:05:34,267
[yawning]
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[yawning]
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[yawning]
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[yawning]
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[Kim grunting]
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[Khlo�] Come on.
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00:05:48,548 --> 00:05:49,482
[sighs]
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That is so not how I am.
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00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:54,420
OK, we all just saw the tape
that proves it.
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00:05:54,487 --> 00:05:56,356
Why aren't you acting like
your normal self?
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You need to surgically remove
that stick up your ass, buddy.
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[Kris] Hey, dolls.
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00:06:01,961 --> 00:06:03,529
-What are you doing?
-Speaking about
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00:06:03,596 --> 00:06:05,765
-a stick up the ass...
-[Bruce] Are you abusing your brother?
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00:06:06,699 --> 00:06:08,801
Khlo�. That's so inappropriate. Khlo�.
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00:06:08,868 --> 00:06:10,570
Khlo�'s always inappropriate,
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just like the anniversary gift
she got you guys.
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00:06:13,439 --> 00:06:15,141
-Always inappropriate.
-[Bruce] Oh, that was totally...
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00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:17,009
[Khlo�] That wasn't inappropriate at all.
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I was so humiliated.
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-[Khlo�] Kourt!
-What's up?
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I'm getting... For Mom and Bruce,
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00:06:22,982 --> 00:06:24,884
-but more for Mom, I would hope.
-[Kourtney] Ooh!
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I wanna get...
Just, like, a stripper or something funny.
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00:06:28,121 --> 00:06:30,490
But I can't decide.
I'm kind of looking at a couple.
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00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:32,725
Wait, that's kind of like
an Olympian pose.
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[Khlo�] I mean, he has a body
like Bruce used to have.
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-[laughing]
-[Kourtney] Nuh-uh.
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00:06:36,662 --> 00:06:38,297
-It's a possibility.
-Look at his cute eyes.
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[Khlo�] He does have cool eyes,
really blue eyes,
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to match the blue hat
covering his nuts.
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00:06:42,769 --> 00:06:43,669
[Kourtney] He's the winner.
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00:06:43,736 --> 00:06:45,405
Mr. Rock Hard Bod.
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00:06:45,738 --> 00:06:46,839
You are our winner.
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-Thank you.
-Thank you.
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Yay!
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00:06:56,082 --> 00:06:56,949
[Kris] Thanks, guys.
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00:06:57,850 --> 00:06:59,385
[Khlo�] Hello, my turn.
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I would just like to say,
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00:07:01,587 --> 00:07:03,189
this is my present.
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00:07:04,056 --> 00:07:05,291
To Mom and Bruce.
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00:07:05,358 --> 00:07:06,459
-Hello.
-Hello.
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00:07:06,592 --> 00:07:08,561
[Khlo�] I wanna show you
what he does for me
196
00:07:08,628 --> 00:07:10,430
on a nightly occurrence.
197
00:07:12,064 --> 00:07:14,033
-Oh, I...
-[Khlo�] Yeah!
198
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:15,101
[crowd cheering]
199
00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:16,536
Oh, honey!
200
00:07:18,137 --> 00:07:19,572
Wait a minute. [laughing]
201
00:07:20,506 --> 00:07:22,442
Oh, my God. Randy!
202
00:07:22,608 --> 00:07:24,911
-[Rob laughing] Oh, my God.
-[laughing] Why do I... No!
203
00:07:25,144 --> 00:07:26,813
Ew! Ew.
204
00:07:26,879 --> 00:07:29,148
-[woman shrieking]
-[Kris] Ew! No.
205
00:07:32,018 --> 00:07:33,085
Oh, my.
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00:07:33,152 --> 00:07:35,555
-[Bruce] Come on, honey.
-[Kris] No, no, no, no.
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00:07:36,889 --> 00:07:38,424
[crowd shouting]
208
00:07:38,691 --> 00:07:40,860
No, no, no, no! No! No!
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00:07:42,328 --> 00:07:44,030
[crowd whooping]
210
00:07:45,131 --> 00:07:47,633
No, no, no, no!
211
00:07:49,068 --> 00:07:50,903
Who was that stripper?
Like, who was that?
212
00:07:51,003 --> 00:07:53,272
Well, it wasn't the picture I got.
He looked different.
213
00:07:53,339 --> 00:07:54,807
That was insane.
214
00:07:54,874 --> 00:07:57,710
Like, is it like Myspace
where you pretend you're someone else?
215
00:07:57,777 --> 00:08:00,046
There should be a stripper company.
That's so embarrassing.
216
00:08:00,112 --> 00:08:01,948
-[Khlo�] I thought he was really cute.
-[Robin] So where'd you find him?
217
00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:04,951
He's right there,
just in case you wanna know.
218
00:08:05,017 --> 00:08:06,652
He's still here.
He's trapped back there.
219
00:08:16,696 --> 00:08:17,730
-[record scratching]
-[hip-hop music playing]
220
00:08:18,598 --> 00:08:19,465
[car horn honking]
221
00:08:19,532 --> 00:08:21,834
-Who's here?
-[Khlo�] Oh, my God, there's five cars.
222
00:08:26,839 --> 00:08:28,474
-[Khlo�] Kim, who is that?
-[Kris] Oh, Kim...
223
00:08:28,541 --> 00:08:30,843
-Who are these people?
-[Khlo�] No idea.
224
00:08:30,910 --> 00:08:33,713
[Kris] They're all really nice cars.
Are they Bentleys?
225
00:08:35,581 --> 00:08:37,850
Hey, how's it going?
226
00:08:38,017 --> 00:08:40,119
-[man] What's up, my name is Realist.
-Hi, Realist.
227
00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:42,555
I stay up the street
and I heard my homegirl Kim stays here
228
00:08:42,622 --> 00:08:43,956
and if it is, I'm just trying to come
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00:08:44,290 --> 00:08:46,826
and kick it and let us know
I'm her neighbor.
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00:08:47,126 --> 00:08:49,395
Oh... Well, welcome to the hood.
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00:08:49,462 --> 00:08:51,430
-[all chuckling]
-[Kris] Come on in!
232
00:08:51,764 --> 00:08:53,399
I have some milk and cookies.
233
00:08:53,466 --> 00:08:55,701
-[man] Cookies!
-[all talking indistinctly]
234
00:08:55,768 --> 00:08:57,870
[Bruce] Real cookies,
they're not funny cookies.
235
00:08:57,937 --> 00:08:58,905
You boys like milk and cookies?
236
00:08:58,971 --> 00:08:59,839
Would you like some?
237
00:09:00,439 --> 00:09:01,774
Turnt! [bleep]
238
00:09:02,008 --> 00:09:04,710
Oh, my God, you guys,
I've got new dishes.
239
00:09:04,777 --> 00:09:06,145
Aren't they cute?
240
00:09:06,212 --> 00:09:07,880
I have some potato chips and dip.
241
00:09:07,947 --> 00:09:09,382
[man] June Cleaver!
242
00:09:09,448 --> 00:09:11,350
[Kris] Grab that if you want
and put it on the table.
243
00:09:11,417 --> 00:09:12,818
Thanks for the help, Khlo�!
244
00:09:12,919 --> 00:09:14,854
[man 2] What's up
with the mean faces, lady?
245
00:09:14,921 --> 00:09:16,789
[Kris] I know.
She's a little bit of a hater.
246
00:09:17,156 --> 00:09:19,692
So what is it that you guys exactly do?
247
00:09:19,959 --> 00:09:21,060
[man] Make music.
248
00:09:21,494 --> 00:09:22,728
-[Kris] What kind of music?
-[man 3] Rap.
249
00:09:22,795 --> 00:09:23,829
Rap. Hip-hop.
250
00:09:23,896 --> 00:09:25,798
[Khlo�] Do you guys have any
that we could put on in the house?
251
00:09:25,865 --> 00:09:27,533
-[Kris] Could I rap?
-Yeah.
252
00:09:28,334 --> 00:09:29,435
[hip-hop music playing on stereo]
253
00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:36,509
-Oh! Oh!
-[all cheering]
254
00:09:39,445 --> 00:09:41,213
Everybody got them thangs on.
255
00:09:41,981 --> 00:09:43,816
This ain't no Luther Vandross.
256
00:09:44,984 --> 00:09:47,353
-[Khlo�] Go, Mom! Go, Mom!
-That wasn't embarrassing at all.
257
00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:48,588
[Bruce] My wife. DJ...
258
00:09:48,654 --> 00:09:49,655
Mom, you brought milk and cookies.
259
00:09:49,722 --> 00:09:51,791
"Embarrassing" is all I gotta say.
260
00:09:51,857 --> 00:09:53,326
Embarrassant�.
261
00:09:53,392 --> 00:09:56,495
[laughing] Up next
is Kris's embarrassing moments.
262
00:09:56,963 --> 00:09:58,297
[laughing]
263
00:09:58,564 --> 00:10:00,499
[Khlo�] Yes, imitate Mom harder.
264
00:10:00,566 --> 00:10:03,202
You guys are picking on me
all the time.
265
00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:04,136
It's wrong.
266
00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:09,475
The most annoying children
I've ever met in...
267
00:10:09,542 --> 00:10:10,409
[rattling louder]
268
00:10:10,476 --> 00:10:12,278
[shouting] In my entire life! Cut it out!
269
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:15,214
-[Kris] Did somebody take my underwear?
-[Kourtney] I did.
270
00:10:15,481 --> 00:10:17,717
I put them on, cause mine, um...
271
00:10:17,783 --> 00:10:19,218
I peed on accident.
272
00:10:19,585 --> 00:10:20,786
I'm just feeling this. Like...
273
00:10:20,853 --> 00:10:22,755
[rapping] My back is achingMy belt's too tight
274
00:10:22,822 --> 00:10:24,690
My hips are shakingFrom the left to the right
275
00:10:24,757 --> 00:10:25,691
-To the left...
-[Khlo�] Mom.
276
00:10:25,758 --> 00:10:26,759
-To the right
-Mom.
277
00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:29,228
[Kourtney] Oh, my God. Literally...
278
00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:31,564
-[Kim] I'm humiliated.
-I need to run out.
279
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:32,732
Like, I'm humiliated.
280
00:10:33,132 --> 00:10:36,569
You're basically a [bleep] psycho
and you're full of mood swings.
281
00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:38,504
All right,
we got the hormone patches over here.
282
00:10:38,571 --> 00:10:41,641
Don't touch it! Cause you have to put it
on a fatty part of your body.
283
00:10:41,707 --> 00:10:42,575
Anywhere!
284
00:10:42,842 --> 00:10:43,709
Ow!
285
00:10:43,776 --> 00:10:45,344
These need to be right here.
286
00:10:46,078 --> 00:10:47,380
Thank you. Bye.
287
00:10:48,314 --> 00:10:49,448
[Khlo� mocking] Thank you.
288
00:10:52,051 --> 00:10:53,552
I don't do that right, either?
289
00:10:53,619 --> 00:10:55,287
You're shaking like a Chihuahua.
290
00:10:55,354 --> 00:10:57,023
-You're talking like this...
-[Bruce] Like Dolce.
291
00:10:57,089 --> 00:10:58,190
-No.
-Yeah.
292
00:10:58,257 --> 00:10:59,125
-No!
-Yeah!
293
00:10:59,692 --> 00:11:01,160
Kylie! Join us!
294
00:11:01,594 --> 00:11:03,596
[singing high note]
295
00:11:05,464 --> 00:11:06,599
-No!
-[Kylie and Khlo�] Yeah!
296
00:11:06,666 --> 00:11:07,600
-No!
-[Kylie and Khlo�] Yeah!
297
00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:09,101
[high pitched singing continues]
298
00:11:10,936 --> 00:11:12,805
I don't think so!
299
00:11:12,872 --> 00:11:14,807
You know what, you guys?
When you gang up on me like this,
300
00:11:15,007 --> 00:11:16,108
Khlo� is not your mother.
301
00:11:16,175 --> 00:11:17,109
Khlo� is my mother.
302
00:11:21,947 --> 00:11:24,817
Mom. What is all over your face?
303
00:11:24,884 --> 00:11:28,354
If you continue to beat somebody down
all the time
304
00:11:28,421 --> 00:11:30,723
and tell them all the things
that are wrong with them,
305
00:11:31,057 --> 00:11:32,591
they're never gonna feel good
about themselves.
306
00:11:32,658 --> 00:11:34,460
Why do you think I drink?
307
00:11:34,560 --> 00:11:36,262
You're so right.
308
00:11:36,429 --> 00:11:39,632
Aww, you poor little thing.
309
00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:40,633
Thank you, honey.
310
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:41,834
You girls are picking on her all the time.
311
00:11:41,934 --> 00:11:43,135
-[girls protesting]
-It's not fair.
312
00:11:43,202 --> 00:11:44,070
Don't be mean.
313
00:11:44,136 --> 00:11:45,471
You really need to calm down and relax.
314
00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:47,473
Calm down?
I'm not calm downing and relaxing.
315
00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:49,141
I'm the authority in this family.
316
00:11:49,408 --> 00:11:50,242
-[Kris] You are?
-Yeah.
317
00:11:50,309 --> 00:11:51,277
OK, Bruce.
318
00:11:51,343 --> 00:11:52,311
-Shocking.
-Shocking!
319
00:11:52,378 --> 00:11:53,546
-Isn't it shocking?
-Shocking!
320
00:11:53,913 --> 00:11:55,915
-I'm gonna feed Bella.
-[Bruce] Well, not right now.
321
00:11:55,981 --> 00:11:57,383
-I have to.
-Not right now. No, Kendall.
322
00:11:57,516 --> 00:11:59,085
You sit down and eat.
323
00:11:59,652 --> 00:12:02,121
-[Kendall] I have to.
-No. When you are done eating,
324
00:12:02,688 --> 00:12:03,856
then you can feed the dog.
325
00:12:03,923 --> 00:12:05,357
Kendall, don't open it up. I...
326
00:12:06,759 --> 00:12:08,327
-It's her dinner time.
-[Bruce] Sit down.
327
00:12:09,428 --> 00:12:10,930
Kendall, I'm not fooling around.
328
00:12:11,063 --> 00:12:13,432
Don't you dare run away from me.
So help me, I will give you a spanking.
329
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:15,134
Sit down there. Kendall!
330
00:12:15,201 --> 00:12:16,335
-[Kendall] I need to...
-Sit down!
331
00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:17,803
[Bruce] Khlo�, come on, we're working out.
332
00:12:17,870 --> 00:12:19,472
Just... Go. Go.
333
00:12:19,538 --> 00:12:21,240
Leave.
334
00:12:21,307 --> 00:12:23,175
Get the stick out of your ass, dude.
335
00:12:23,242 --> 00:12:25,644
You're her mother. Tell her no.
336
00:12:26,011 --> 00:12:28,881
[Kris] I just don't want him to get upsetone more time.
337
00:12:28,948 --> 00:12:31,917
-Cranky old man.
-How about a little control around here?
338
00:12:32,384 --> 00:12:33,519
Hey, Scrooge.
339
00:12:33,819 --> 00:12:34,954
[Bruce] Get off that car.
340
00:12:35,020 --> 00:12:36,255
-Get off that car.
-[car engine starting]
341
00:12:36,322 --> 00:12:37,189
Get off that car.
342
00:12:37,256 --> 00:12:38,190
[Khlo�] Run!
343
00:12:39,792 --> 00:12:43,362
Those girls totally remind me of us
when we were little.
344
00:12:43,429 --> 00:12:44,396
-They do.
-[Bruce] Now wait a second.
345
00:12:44,463 --> 00:12:46,465
Those are two of the most well-behaved,
346
00:12:46,532 --> 00:12:48,634
-well-disciplined and well-parented...
-[all] OK.
347
00:12:48,701 --> 00:12:50,402
[Bruce] ...kids I've ever seen in my life.
348
00:12:50,469 --> 00:12:51,904
Delusional.
349
00:12:51,971 --> 00:12:54,173
-They're gonna be perfect children.
-You have no idea.
350
00:12:54,240 --> 00:12:56,175
Wanna see what happens
when you're not there?
351
00:12:56,642 --> 00:12:58,043
[phone ringing]
352
00:12:59,979 --> 00:13:01,680
You know what,
you're picking the wrong number,
353
00:13:01,747 --> 00:13:03,883
-so take a chill pill.
-[giggling]
354
00:13:05,551 --> 00:13:06,418
Stop.
355
00:13:06,752 --> 00:13:07,620
[Khlo�] And relax...
356
00:13:08,254 --> 00:13:09,722
You guys, stop it.
357
00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:11,323
She hit me first!
358
00:13:11,390 --> 00:13:13,259
[inhales deeply] Mom!
359
00:13:13,559 --> 00:13:15,561
-[Brody] Oh! [groaning]
-[giggling]
360
00:13:16,362 --> 00:13:17,296
[car engine starting]
361
00:13:17,663 --> 00:13:18,631
Woo!
362
00:13:18,697 --> 00:13:20,399
-I don't think that's a good...
-[car horn honks]
363
00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:22,268
We're gonna have two cocktails
on the rocks.
364
00:13:22,334 --> 00:13:23,836
Make 'em strong, Derek.
365
00:13:23,903 --> 00:13:24,770
[giggling]
366
00:13:24,837 --> 00:13:26,105
Two cocktails, coming up.
367
00:13:26,172 --> 00:13:28,340
Look at my little sisters.
Look at them.
368
00:13:28,407 --> 00:13:29,875
[snorts] They're insane.
369
00:13:32,044 --> 00:13:33,279
Oh, God, Kendall!
370
00:13:33,345 --> 00:13:34,513
Stop! Ow!
371
00:13:34,780 --> 00:13:36,382
Ow! [laughing]
372
00:13:36,749 --> 00:13:37,850
Ow!
373
00:13:38,017 --> 00:13:39,418
-Yo!
-Stop.
374
00:13:39,485 --> 00:13:40,886
Stop! Don't pee on me!
375
00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:42,388
Ow.
376
00:13:42,855 --> 00:13:43,722
Stop!
377
00:13:43,889 --> 00:13:45,024
-Pusher.
-[groans]
378
00:13:45,257 --> 00:13:46,125
-You.
-Stop!
379
00:13:46,559 --> 00:13:47,760
-Chill, OK?
-Ow.
380
00:13:48,928 --> 00:13:49,795
That scares me.
381
00:13:49,862 --> 00:13:52,131
-[Kris] That freaked me out.
-It should, bitch.
382
00:13:52,198 --> 00:13:53,432
You know, the one thing
that bothers me the most
383
00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:54,800
is the language.
384
00:13:54,867 --> 00:13:55,734
-Oh, God.
-OK?
385
00:13:55,801 --> 00:13:57,603
-[all talking]
-It's so disappointing. Especially you.
386
00:13:57,670 --> 00:13:58,771
You!
387
00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:01,640
Oh, [bleep] you, you [bleep].
388
00:14:01,707 --> 00:14:04,977
[bleep] you, [bleep] you and [bleep] you!
389
00:14:05,110 --> 00:14:05,978
[bleep]
390
00:14:06,045 --> 00:14:07,580
-[chuckling]
-[Bruce] That was so bad.
391
00:14:07,646 --> 00:14:11,016
-You [bleep], I can't believe [bleep]...
-[all chuckling]
392
00:14:11,083 --> 00:14:12,685
...that came of your mouth.
Did you hear me?
393
00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:15,621
-Yeah!
-I got bleeped! Yay!
394
00:14:15,688 --> 00:14:17,690
[all cheering]
395
00:14:17,756 --> 00:14:19,225
[Bruce] I apologize to everybody.
396
00:14:19,291 --> 00:14:21,427
That's my mission,
is to clean your mouth up.
397
00:14:21,493 --> 00:14:23,429
If you think that's disgusting,
398
00:14:23,495 --> 00:14:27,132
you have no idea what I had to experience
with this girl.
399
00:14:27,199 --> 00:14:30,436
The disgusting scent
coming out of her body.
400
00:14:30,502 --> 00:14:32,338
-You guys were there.
-[all chuckling]
401
00:14:32,404 --> 00:14:33,806
-I gave birth to her.
-[Bruce] Stop!
402
00:14:34,473 --> 00:14:35,474
Be respectful.
403
00:14:35,541 --> 00:14:37,776
[Khlo�] Oh, my God,
does my hair really smell?
404
00:14:38,110 --> 00:14:40,779
-[sniffing] Oh, my God.
-Does it smell bad?
405
00:14:41,113 --> 00:14:42,815
Oh, my God!
406
00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:45,517
Oh, my God, it smells like B.O.
407
00:14:45,684 --> 00:14:48,621
Khlo� tells me that she's been using
this horse shampoo
408
00:14:48,687 --> 00:14:51,624
that she thinks will make her hairreally thick and great,
409
00:14:51,724 --> 00:14:55,094
and I think it just makes it
smell disgusting.
410
00:14:55,494 --> 00:14:58,097
You guys really need to wash my hair.
I'm not joking.
411
00:14:58,163 --> 00:14:59,598
[Kourtney] No, I'm not washing your hair.
412
00:14:59,665 --> 00:15:02,635
-You just took a shower...
-Please! I'm in need, obviously.
413
00:15:05,337 --> 00:15:07,640
-[grunting]
-[all laughing]
414
00:15:11,410 --> 00:15:13,612
-[laughs]
-Are you joking?
415
00:15:14,680 --> 00:15:15,681
Wait, that's good?
416
00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:17,650
[laughing] Hallelujah.
417
00:15:17,716 --> 00:15:19,718
You never know what to expect from Khlo�.
418
00:15:19,785 --> 00:15:22,254
She's definitely
the free spirit of the family.
419
00:15:22,321 --> 00:15:24,089
[in high-pitched warble] You.
420
00:15:24,156 --> 00:15:26,959
-[Kourtney] You have the greatest voice.
-[warbling] I heart you.
421
00:15:27,626 --> 00:15:29,862
OK, you... Khlo�...
422
00:15:30,062 --> 00:15:31,497
Maybe you shouldn't even come
in the morning.
423
00:15:31,864 --> 00:15:32,731
Ooh!
424
00:15:33,098 --> 00:15:34,667
[Khlo� in grunting voice]
I need a pap smear.
425
00:15:34,733 --> 00:15:37,670
Look, Kimmy. It's my vagina.
426
00:15:39,138 --> 00:15:41,507
Seriously, shut the [bleep] up
and let me tell you my story.
427
00:15:41,573 --> 00:15:42,608
Don't be a [bleep].
428
00:15:42,675 --> 00:15:44,209
[Khlo�] Oh, [bleep] a duck.
429
00:15:44,276 --> 00:15:47,513
I'm not OK. I need a [bleep] Xanax,
I need something.
430
00:15:47,579 --> 00:15:48,881
This is [bleep].
431
00:15:48,948 --> 00:15:50,749
You psychotic freak.
432
00:15:51,850 --> 00:15:52,718
Get the [bleep] out.
433
00:15:52,851 --> 00:15:54,486
-Let's go.
-Hi!
434
00:15:54,553 --> 00:15:56,555
Oh, mwah, mwah!
435
00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:59,024
-Mwah! Mwah!
-OK. Khlo�.
436
00:15:59,358 --> 00:16:01,226
-Khlo�, we gotta go.
-[laughing]
437
00:16:06,565 --> 00:16:08,767
-Hi.
-[man] Hello. How are you?
438
00:16:09,168 --> 00:16:10,502
-What's your name?
-Shorty.
439
00:16:10,569 --> 00:16:11,870
Shorty, I'm Khlo�.
440
00:16:11,937 --> 00:16:13,639
[Khlo�] Shorty needs a shower,
441
00:16:13,706 --> 00:16:16,442
and my mom told me to do
whatever I needed to to help him.
442
00:16:16,508 --> 00:16:17,643
So I'm gonna use her shower.
443
00:16:18,010 --> 00:16:19,211
I wonder how he's doing.
444
00:16:19,645 --> 00:16:21,380
-Oh, we know.
-We know how Shorty's doing.
445
00:16:21,447 --> 00:16:23,749
-[Kris] Oh, how's Shorty?
-That's our little surprise for you guys.
446
00:16:23,816 --> 00:16:25,551
You get to see how he's doing.
447
00:16:25,617 --> 00:16:26,585
-No way.
-Wow.
448
00:16:26,652 --> 00:16:27,820
Oh, good. I hope he's doing well.
449
00:16:30,356 --> 00:16:32,491
Excuse me! Have you seen this man?
450
00:16:32,558 --> 00:16:34,727
[Khlo�] We heard Shorty lives aroundHollywood and Highland.
451
00:16:34,793 --> 00:16:36,829
We don't know which way he is
right now, though.
452
00:16:36,895 --> 00:16:38,330
Have you seen Shorty?
453
00:16:38,397 --> 00:16:39,398
-Shorty?
-Shorty.
454
00:16:39,465 --> 00:16:41,600
-Shorty?
-[gasps] Shorty!
455
00:16:42,167 --> 00:16:43,335
[Kourtney] Oh, my gosh!
456
00:16:43,769 --> 00:16:45,738
We've been looking for you everywhere.
457
00:16:45,804 --> 00:16:48,407
-Wait, you look like you've lost weight.
-Hi, Shorty.
458
00:16:48,474 --> 00:16:50,309
I'm always a hard man to find.
459
00:16:50,376 --> 00:16:51,977
-Is that how you like it?
-Look, Shorty, look!
460
00:16:52,044 --> 00:16:53,012
We've been looking for you.
461
00:16:53,078 --> 00:16:54,713
Are you gonna show us around?
462
00:16:55,280 --> 00:16:56,682
Look how cool that is in there.
463
00:16:57,316 --> 00:16:59,385
-[Shorty] This is the girls.
-[girls] Hi.
464
00:16:59,451 --> 00:17:00,586
They're out there looking for me.
465
00:17:04,356 --> 00:17:05,591
[Khlo�] It's gonna be amazing.
466
00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:06,625
[camera shutter clicks]
467
00:17:08,727 --> 00:17:09,995
When does it go?
468
00:17:12,264 --> 00:17:13,932
[Kim] To Shorty.
469
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:17,002
You better keep my picture.
470
00:17:17,469 --> 00:17:18,971
Bye, Shorty.
471
00:17:19,038 --> 00:17:21,173
-Hugs!
-"Hug" ain't the word.
472
00:17:21,440 --> 00:17:23,409
But you know. You just gave in.
473
00:17:27,646 --> 00:17:29,314
[singing] Shorty is a 10...
474
00:17:29,381 --> 00:17:30,983
Shorty. I'm glad to see he's doing OK.
475
00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:33,852
Wait. What you guys couldn't see
is the best part
476
00:17:33,919 --> 00:17:36,555
-of the entire Shorty excursion. [laughs]
-What?
477
00:17:36,622 --> 00:17:39,992
Kourtney falling
on Hollywood and Highland.
478
00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:41,827
-[Bruce] No way.
-[Kim] So funny.
479
00:17:43,128 --> 00:17:44,129
-Who knows.
-I feel like this is so...
480
00:17:44,196 --> 00:17:45,564
-[screams]
-[Khlo�] Oh, my God!
481
00:17:45,964 --> 00:17:47,099
[Khlo� laughs] Are you OK?
482
00:17:47,533 --> 00:17:48,934
-[Kourtney laughing]
-Are you OK?
483
00:17:49,134 --> 00:17:50,836
[Shorty] Now don't you hurt yourself.
484
00:17:51,136 --> 00:17:52,237
[tape rewinding]
485
00:17:52,304 --> 00:17:53,505
-I feel like this is so...
-[screams]
486
00:17:56,308 --> 00:17:58,477
[slowed-down audio playing]
487
00:18:02,614 --> 00:18:04,083
[laughs] Way to go, Kourtney.
488
00:18:04,149 --> 00:18:06,485
Oh, thanks, I worked hard on that.
489
00:18:06,552 --> 00:18:08,253
Oh, it was very good.
490
00:18:08,320 --> 00:18:10,322
-Embarrassing.
-And it was like, a year ago.
491
00:18:10,389 --> 00:18:12,558
You should not be talking.
All you and Scott do
492
00:18:12,624 --> 00:18:14,026
is make out all day long.
493
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:15,360
-Khlo�!
-Jealous.
494
00:18:15,427 --> 00:18:18,430
-I'm jealous cause I'm not humping Scott?
-Jealous.
495
00:18:18,697 --> 00:18:19,998
[romantic music playing]
496
00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:30,042
[Khlo�] Kourtney and Scott,
stop making out!
497
00:18:30,442 --> 00:18:31,910
Come to me, my jungle friend.
498
00:18:32,177 --> 00:18:34,279
-Oh, my God.
-[laughing] Oh, my God.
499
00:18:34,480 --> 00:18:35,881
I'm gonna barf.
500
00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:37,950
[Scott] We wanted to know
if we had your blessing
501
00:18:38,317 --> 00:18:40,152
on waiting about the pre-marital sex.
502
00:18:40,219 --> 00:18:41,386
Not pregnant.
503
00:18:42,187 --> 00:18:44,389
Let's go home and keep practicing
not getting pregnant.
504
00:18:44,456 --> 00:18:45,858
-You're not a slore.
-Duh.
505
00:18:45,924 --> 00:18:47,526
[Scott] Let's go and pretend you are
for a little bit, though.
506
00:18:47,593 --> 00:18:48,560
-[laughing]
-Come on.
507
00:18:49,027 --> 00:18:50,462
Yeah. What happened to you last night?
508
00:18:50,529 --> 00:18:51,597
We had a little...
509
00:18:52,698 --> 00:18:54,766
night in the Jacuzzi.
510
00:18:54,833 --> 00:18:56,001
[Khlo�] Ew!
511
00:18:56,068 --> 00:18:59,404
Now none of us can go in that Jacuzzi
for the rest of the trip.
512
00:18:59,471 --> 00:19:01,840
I'm happy making it and breaking it.
Ya heard?
513
00:19:01,907 --> 00:19:02,808
Oh, my God.
514
00:19:02,875 --> 00:19:04,810
I love you so much.
515
00:19:05,477 --> 00:19:06,411
[chuckles]
516
00:19:06,478 --> 00:19:08,313
[in funny voice] Who the hell...
Oh, you're touching me real nice.
517
00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:11,517
'Bout to take you away to the bedroom...
Why am I talking like that?
518
00:19:11,583 --> 00:19:13,352
-Khlo, gotta run, love ya.
-Oh, my God!
519
00:19:13,418 --> 00:19:14,686
[Scott] You're gonna get it now.
520
00:19:14,753 --> 00:19:17,356
I have no one to talk to anymore.
521
00:19:18,023 --> 00:19:19,925
-You guys need to get a room.
-You do.
522
00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:21,426
-[Rob] Yeah.
-OK, "get a room"?
523
00:19:21,493 --> 00:19:24,396
Let's talk about you getting costumed,
shall we?
524
00:19:24,463 --> 00:19:25,464
Oh, you are the queen of dressing up.
525
00:19:25,531 --> 00:19:27,466
I love it! It's dress-up.
526
00:19:32,938 --> 00:19:35,107
[Kim] Oh, my gosh.
It's like Halloween every day in here.
527
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:37,209
-[clerk] It is.
.-We're shopping for...
528
00:19:37,276 --> 00:19:40,612
Kim's boyfriend is injured,
so she wants a nurse's outfit.
529
00:19:40,679 --> 00:19:42,080
-[laughing]
-Oh, that will make him feel better.
530
00:19:42,614 --> 00:19:45,584
Khlo�, Reggie is gonna die.
I'm gonna take such good care of him.
531
00:19:45,951 --> 00:19:47,953
Who needs some help?
532
00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:49,254
-[Khlo�] Reggie.
-Doctor, doctor.
533
00:19:49,354 --> 00:19:52,457
[Khlo�] You need stripper shoes
when you look like a stripper.
534
00:19:52,524 --> 00:19:53,926
-[Kim] Really?
-[both] Yes!
535
00:19:54,226 --> 00:19:55,561
[Kourtney] You look so cute.
536
00:19:55,694 --> 00:19:56,562
Oh! [laughing]
537
00:19:56,628 --> 00:19:59,831
[laughing] I went to school with nuns.
I'll whip you with this whip.
538
00:19:59,898 --> 00:20:01,800
I'm gonna be Major Trouble.
539
00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:04,036
-[Khlo�] That is amazing.
-[laughing]
540
00:20:04,102 --> 00:20:05,070
[camera shutter clicking]
541
00:20:05,137 --> 00:20:06,438
That's really hot, Kim.
542
00:20:15,113 --> 00:20:17,716
So, did the Bush like the outfits?
543
00:20:17,783 --> 00:20:19,518
That's private between us.
544
00:20:19,585 --> 00:20:21,119
-Oh, shut up!
-[all] Aww!
545
00:20:21,186 --> 00:20:22,654
[Kim] Khlo�, what do you think?
546
00:20:22,721 --> 00:20:24,389
-Sure.
-Did the Bush like the tush or not?
547
00:20:24,456 --> 00:20:26,291
The Bush loves the tush.
548
00:20:26,358 --> 00:20:27,492
[all chuckle]
549
00:20:27,726 --> 00:20:28,927
-Khlo�.
-What?
550
00:20:28,994 --> 00:20:31,563
-I have a big surprise for you.
-What?
551
00:20:31,630 --> 00:20:34,233
-I've got it hidden away.
-What is it?
552
00:20:34,299 --> 00:20:36,235
The guy that you made out with
553
00:20:36,301 --> 00:20:38,070
-in acting class...
-Yeah?
554
00:20:38,437 --> 00:20:39,304
Action.
555
00:20:39,371 --> 00:20:41,340
Where were you?
You were supposed to call.
556
00:20:41,406 --> 00:20:42,307
I waited.
557
00:20:42,374 --> 00:20:44,176
This is not a cop show.
I don't need to answer this.
558
00:20:44,243 --> 00:20:46,845
[coach] Get in there.
Come on, Khlo�, get in there!
559
00:20:47,446 --> 00:20:49,081
You never hugged me, babe.
560
00:20:51,383 --> 00:20:52,451
Oh, my God.
561
00:20:53,885 --> 00:20:54,853
[howling]
562
00:20:54,953 --> 00:20:56,355
[cheering and applause continues]
563
00:20:59,558 --> 00:21:01,260
So? That was just acting.
564
00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:04,529
He's a huge porn star.
565
00:21:05,063 --> 00:21:08,467
[Bruce] Oh! No way!
566
00:21:08,533 --> 00:21:09,434
[Kris and Rob laughing]
567
00:21:10,502 --> 00:21:13,605
-So, Khlo�, your little porn star friend...
-[Khlo�] No, he's not.
568
00:21:13,672 --> 00:21:15,607
[Kourtney] Has been in
over 180 movies...
569
00:21:15,674 --> 00:21:19,011
-[Khlo� scoffs]
-And I took the pleasure of writing down
570
00:21:19,077 --> 00:21:21,113
-some of the titles.
-I don't want to hear this. It's sick.
571
00:21:21,179 --> 00:21:23,148
-"Anal Intruder"...
-Oh, my God.
572
00:21:23,215 --> 00:21:25,417
-"Taste Her Ass."
-OK, bye.
573
00:21:25,484 --> 00:21:26,685
"Juicy G-Spots"...
574
00:21:26,752 --> 00:21:28,086
[Bruce] Yeah, we don't need
to listen to this. Let's go.
575
00:21:28,153 --> 00:21:29,721
-"Chicks and Salsa."
-[Khlo�] I'm outta here.
576
00:21:29,788 --> 00:21:30,656
Sorry, doll.
577
00:21:30,989 --> 00:21:31,990
[screams]
578
00:21:32,057 --> 00:21:33,292
[laughing]
579
00:21:37,829 --> 00:21:38,864
-[screams]
-We love you!
580
00:21:39,564 --> 00:21:42,868
[Kim] Bye, everyone.
Thanks for joining us on...
581
00:21:42,934 --> 00:21:43,902
[Khlo�] Junk in your trunk.
582
00:21:44,036 --> 00:21:45,037
[Khlo� whooping]
43122
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