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1
00:00:11,920 --> 00:00:15,719
I honestly have no idea
why Teddy wants to meet.
2
00:00:15,720 --> 00:00:19,399
Well, perhaps given your
new position of authority,
3
00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:23,799
he wishes to extend an olive
branch, president to president.
4
00:00:23,800 --> 00:00:25,719
Espionage is more likely.
5
00:00:25,720 --> 00:00:28,999
To find out what the
Players' summer show is.
6
00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:31,839
Not that I've managed to
decide what it is yet.
7
00:00:31,840 --> 00:00:33,759
All in good time, Mrs Devine.
8
00:00:33,760 --> 00:00:34,800
Why here?
9
00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:38,199
Between us, Father, I've heard
10
00:00:38,200 --> 00:00:41,439
that the Hambleston
Amateur Dramatic Society...
11
00:00:41,440 --> 00:00:42,639
HADS.
12
00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:47,279
Is withering on the vine ever
since Teddy took over from...
13
00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:48,879
Emerald!
14
00:00:48,880 --> 00:00:50,519
Fancy seeing you here.
15
00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:53,479
Oh, I am so glad
to see you both.
16
00:00:53,480 --> 00:00:55,559
I don't suppose you
happen to know...
17
00:00:55,560 --> 00:00:58,320
Best to hear it direct
from the horse's mouth.
18
00:00:59,600 --> 00:01:00,640
Hmm.
19
00:01:04,720 --> 00:01:06,880
Surely this can't be for HADS.
20
00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:10,120
Not just for HADS, I hope.
21
00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:14,199
Isabel.
22
00:01:14,200 --> 00:01:18,439
Simply divine to see you.
23
00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:20,160
And Father!
24
00:01:21,480 --> 00:01:22,879
Emerald.
25
00:01:22,880 --> 00:01:24,119
Teddy.
26
00:01:24,120 --> 00:01:27,279
Welcome to Kembleston Manor.
27
00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:28,559
Kembleston?
28
00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:31,079
It's time to unite, Isabel.
29
00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:34,199
Look, I'm not going
to sugar-coat this,
30
00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:36,319
HADS is in a bit of a pickle.
31
00:01:36,320 --> 00:01:39,079
Most of the cast
have... departed.
32
00:01:39,080 --> 00:01:40,719
Amicably.
33
00:01:40,720 --> 00:01:43,959
This is the most ambitious
production I've ever directed.
34
00:01:43,960 --> 00:01:47,959
We open at the end of
the month, so needs must.
35
00:01:47,960 --> 00:01:50,239
Will you join us?
36
00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:54,839
Well, to perform in an actual
theatre would be thrilling.
37
00:01:54,840 --> 00:01:57,199
What is the play, if you
don't mind my asking?
38
00:01:57,200 --> 00:02:00,039
Oh, I think you'll
approve, Father,
39
00:02:00,040 --> 00:02:01,919
life imitating art and all that.
40
00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:05,359
Behold - The Most
Perfect Murder.
41
00:02:05,360 --> 00:02:07,559
Hambleston's answer
to The Mousetrap.
42
00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:09,359
A worldwide premiere.
43
00:02:09,360 --> 00:02:11,359
Written by a priest, I see.
44
00:02:11,360 --> 00:02:14,519
Who's a big fan of
yours, actually.
45
00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:16,280
You didn't tell
me he was coming!
46
00:02:17,840 --> 00:02:19,239
It's you!
47
00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:20,680
HE LAUGHS EXCITEDLY
48
00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:24,999
It's literally you!
49
00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:26,520
Yes, it is.
50
00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:32,400
Father, may I present Hambleston's
new priest, Father Lindsey.
51
00:02:34,160 --> 00:02:38,280
This is the most exquisite
moment of my entire life.
52
00:02:40,880 --> 00:02:42,880
Oh! Is he dead?
53
00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:46,479
No, he just fainted.
54
00:02:46,480 --> 00:02:47,639
Oh, splendid!
55
00:02:47,640 --> 00:02:50,199
So, Isabel, what say you?
56
00:02:50,200 --> 00:02:52,680
Are you ready to
make some magic?
57
00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:34,639
{\an8}Might I just apologise
again for yesterday?
58
00:03:34,640 --> 00:03:37,240
It's just you are something
of an inspiration to me.
59
00:03:38,360 --> 00:03:40,159
Just one question.
60
00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:44,919
We know who done it, but
not as yet how done it.
61
00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:47,479
The play seems to be
missing an ending.
62
00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:49,999
Ah, therein lies the rub.
63
00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:52,039
I haven't quite
figured it out yet.
64
00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:55,559
Shouldn't you have done that
before you started writing it?
65
00:03:55,560 --> 00:03:57,520
Welcome, all.
66
00:03:58,680 --> 00:04:04,279
And may I introduce the genius
behind our remarkable sets.
67
00:04:04,280 --> 00:04:07,519
Herman Jolly, the
Kembleford Players.
68
00:04:07,520 --> 00:04:11,760
They're going to ruin all
my good work, aren't they?
69
00:04:12,840 --> 00:04:16,279
Oh, nice to meet you too.
70
00:04:16,280 --> 00:04:17,799
Teddy!
71
00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:20,319
The cost of hiring
the Royal Theatre.
72
00:04:20,320 --> 00:04:22,439
We are amateurs!
73
00:04:22,440 --> 00:04:25,800
A dirty word. Which I
am removing from HADS.
74
00:04:26,840 --> 00:04:29,840
Behold, HDS!
75
00:04:30,840 --> 00:04:33,199
Amateurs are the
lifeblood of this company,
76
00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:36,399
which was founded to
enrich local lives. Mm...
77
00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:37,879
Like poor Sandy. Yeah.
78
00:04:37,880 --> 00:04:40,439
This production is too much.
79
00:04:40,440 --> 00:04:43,159
If you don't like it, you
know where the door is.
80
00:04:43,160 --> 00:04:44,759
Perhaps, as founder of HADS,
81
00:04:44,760 --> 00:04:46,719
you could show
Emerald some respect.
82
00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:49,799
One of our backstage
stalwarts, Bonnie Codling.
83
00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:52,200
Who'd do well to
stop her prattling!
84
00:04:53,320 --> 00:04:55,519
And you wonder why we're
haemorrhaging members.
85
00:04:55,520 --> 00:04:59,079
May I suggest we proceed
with the auditions?
86
00:04:59,080 --> 00:05:00,599
CLAPS HANDS
87
00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:03,279
We open in three weeks.
88
00:05:03,280 --> 00:05:04,519
Good morning.
89
00:05:04,520 --> 00:05:07,399
Thank you for your
moral support, Edgar.
90
00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:10,319
Yeah, perhaps you could
even audition, sir?
91
00:05:10,320 --> 00:05:11,959
CLEARS THROAT I think not.
92
00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:14,319
Yeah, I don't think I'm
going to bother either.
93
00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:16,239
Have you read the
part of Tabitha?
94
00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:17,999
She dances the Charleston.
95
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:20,879
Oh! I do love the Charleston.
96
00:05:20,880 --> 00:05:23,399
Oh, you should
definitely audition!
97
00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:26,279
Might I suggest you
audition too, Father?
98
00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:28,759
Or perhaps a backstage role?
99
00:05:28,760 --> 00:05:31,959
The priest was written
with you in mind.
100
00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:33,640
No acting required.
101
00:05:37,440 --> 00:05:39,519
Guided by God,
102
00:05:39,520 --> 00:05:44,159
I have surmised that someone
here must be responsible.
103
00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:46,119
"But how?", I hear you ask,
104
00:05:46,120 --> 00:05:50,280
"when everyone was together
during that fateful shot?"
105
00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:53,839
It is, quite simply,
106
00:05:53,840 --> 00:05:56,400
the most perfect murder.
107
00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:01,879
Bravo, Father.
108
00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:04,080
He is awfully good, isn't he?
109
00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:10,919
And to shall play my wife,
Lady Ursula Etherington,
110
00:06:10,920 --> 00:06:12,280
Mrs Divine.
111
00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:14,599
Well-deserved.
112
00:06:14,600 --> 00:06:17,319
And our daughter, the
socialite Tabitha,
113
00:06:17,320 --> 00:06:18,920
shall be played by Brenda.
114
00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:21,999
There wasn't much competition.
115
00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:24,119
Oh, don't you dare
sell yourself short.
116
00:06:24,120 --> 00:06:25,159
You were wonderful!
117
00:06:25,160 --> 00:06:28,679
Sergeant Goodfellow. Yes? You
will be Inspector Crabtree.
118
00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:29,999
Ah, marvellous!
119
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:32,399
At least he finally
gets the job.
120
00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:34,199
FATHER BROWN CLEARS HIS THROAT
121
00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:36,159
Yes, you'll be Horace,
122
00:06:36,160 --> 00:06:39,079
victim of the dastardly murder.
123
00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:42,239
Oh, only one small scene.
No, no, there is another one.
124
00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:43,879
There's a corpse.
125
00:06:43,880 --> 00:06:45,959
Even you could
manage that, Father.
126
00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:49,720
And the part of Father Greene
goes to Chief Inspector Sullivan.
127
00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:52,599
Ah...
128
00:06:52,600 --> 00:06:54,599
No, I didn't audition.
129
00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:57,999
It's just that we're in
need of one more male,
130
00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:02,159
and everyone knows what a
marvellous Benedick you were,
131
00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:03,239
so...
132
00:07:03,240 --> 00:07:04,919
No, absolutely not.
133
00:07:04,920 --> 00:07:09,000
Edgar, this has to be a success,
and there's no-one else.
134
00:07:10,240 --> 00:07:11,359
He'll do it.
135
00:07:11,360 --> 00:07:12,599
Splendid!
136
00:07:12,600 --> 00:07:18,159
Now, as well as playing Fanny
Tinkle, our frumpy maid...
137
00:07:18,160 --> 00:07:19,759
No acting required.
138
00:07:19,760 --> 00:07:22,719
Emerald will be in
charge of costumes,
139
00:07:22,720 --> 00:07:26,239
and Bonnie will be assisting
with make-up and also assisting
140
00:07:26,240 --> 00:07:27,639
with set construction.
141
00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:30,319
No, no, no, no. I'll
take anyone else.
142
00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:31,999
Do you see what he's like?
143
00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:34,039
Please. Please, everyone.
144
00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:39,399
The only way this play is going to
be the success it deserves to be
145
00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:42,479
is if we all unite.
146
00:07:42,480 --> 00:07:45,959
Then I need to know
how the play ends.
147
00:07:45,960 --> 00:07:48,599
How did the murder happen?
148
00:07:48,600 --> 00:07:50,239
Crumbs.
149
00:07:50,240 --> 00:07:52,399
That's the problem with
an impossible murder.
150
00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:54,839
I've written myself into
something of a corner.
151
00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:56,519
Perhaps I could assist.
152
00:07:56,520 --> 00:07:59,839
Thank you, Father, but
this is my problem alone.
153
00:07:59,840 --> 00:08:01,120
It'll come to me.
154
00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:04,159
In good time, I hope, Father.
155
00:08:04,160 --> 00:08:07,160
The clock, as they
say, is ticking.
156
00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:11,800
MUSIC COVERS SPEECH
157
00:08:47,320 --> 00:08:49,959
I've laid my reputation
on this, Father.
158
00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:52,359
If it doesn't go
well, I'll be deposed.
159
00:08:52,360 --> 00:08:54,800
I'm sure everything
will be quite...
160
00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:57,640
Ah, gosh!
161
00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:00,440
It's magnificent!
162
00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:04,199
At least my work
will be admired.
163
00:09:04,200 --> 00:09:08,240
Could you for once stop
being such a braggart?
164
00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:11,799
And I need a word
with you later.
165
00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:15,159
Happy birthday, Emerald,
from all of us here.
166
00:09:15,160 --> 00:09:17,919
Oh, thank you.
167
00:09:17,920 --> 00:09:20,199
That is so thoughtful
of you all.
168
00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:21,319
Thank you.
169
00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:23,519
Priorities, people.
170
00:09:23,520 --> 00:09:26,719
We open in TWO DAYS.
171
00:09:26,720 --> 00:09:28,280
Everything all right?
172
00:09:29,240 --> 00:09:30,800
FATHER LINDSEY: I've done it!
173
00:09:32,160 --> 00:09:34,400
I've actually done it!
174
00:09:36,080 --> 00:09:40,159
A rush of inspiration
from the Lord himself.
175
00:09:40,160 --> 00:09:44,119
Who knew this murder lark
could be such jolly good fun?
176
00:09:44,120 --> 00:09:45,679
Ingenious!
177
00:09:45,680 --> 00:09:47,439
Well done, Father.
178
00:09:47,440 --> 00:09:49,999
Nobody will see that coming.
179
00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:53,999
How did you come up with this?
180
00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:56,519
Oh, it just sort of
popped into my head.
181
00:09:56,520 --> 00:09:59,159
Sometimes I do astound myself.
182
00:09:59,160 --> 00:10:03,360
I've never read such far-fetched
tripe in all my life!
183
00:10:05,920 --> 00:10:09,839
Oh. Perhaps I should
stick to my day job.
184
00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:12,279
I think it's splendid, Father.
185
00:10:12,280 --> 00:10:16,200
This really is going to
be a seminal production.
186
00:10:20,600 --> 00:10:23,919
It's a simply... Simply...
187
00:10:23,920 --> 00:10:26,519
TEDDY: Beastly.
188
00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:28,159
Beastly business.
189
00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:31,359
One would rather be miserable
in the back of a Rolls
190
00:10:31,360 --> 00:10:33,319
than happy on a bicycle.
191
00:10:33,320 --> 00:10:35,999
Well, how did you find out?
192
00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:40,919
I overheard him, right
here, from the hidey-hole.
193
00:10:40,920 --> 00:10:46,320
The what? Honestly, Mummy, you
can be so oblivious sometimes.
194
00:10:47,720 --> 00:10:49,159
Oh...
195
00:10:49,160 --> 00:10:53,039
Oh, for goodness'
sake, where's Herman?
196
00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:54,759
I haven't seen him all day.
197
00:10:54,760 --> 00:10:56,400
Isn't that his jacket?
198
00:10:57,600 --> 00:10:59,960
Will somebody
please find Herman?
199
00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:04,800
Argh!
200
00:11:06,520 --> 00:11:09,120
I trust this is
some kind of a joke.
201
00:11:14,280 --> 00:11:16,440
I'm afraid not, Mr Sadwick.
202
00:11:18,240 --> 00:11:19,680
He's dead.
203
00:11:21,520 --> 00:11:23,360
FATHER LINDSEY
CRASHES TO THE FLOOR
204
00:11:32,480 --> 00:11:34,319
Are you sure you're all right?
205
00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:39,359
Yes, thank you, Father, I'm just
not a huge fan of dead bodies.
206
00:11:39,360 --> 00:11:42,479
Then perhaps it's best
you both leave me to it.
207
00:11:42,480 --> 00:11:46,999
Note the blunt trauma wound
to the back of the head.
208
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:49,439
And judging by the rigor mortis,
209
00:11:49,440 --> 00:11:52,319
he's been dead... I'd say
for at least six hours.
210
00:11:52,320 --> 00:11:54,880
Yes, I can make my own
deductions, thank you.
211
00:12:05,280 --> 00:12:08,639
Er, Father, would you mind
not tampering with the scene
212
00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:09,879
of the crime, please?
213
00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:11,359
Apologies, Chief Inspector.
214
00:12:11,360 --> 00:12:13,199
Now, if you would both kindly...
215
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:16,759
I trust you will let us know the
outcome of the pathologist's report?
216
00:12:16,760 --> 00:12:17,799
Goodfellow.
217
00:12:17,800 --> 00:12:20,119
Come now, Fathers,
let us do our job.
218
00:12:20,120 --> 00:12:21,600
Of course, Sergeant.
219
00:12:23,240 --> 00:12:24,840
A thousand apologies.
220
00:12:35,160 --> 00:12:37,519
EMERALD: Perhaps
it is for the best.
221
00:12:37,520 --> 00:12:41,439
I don't mean because he's
dead, God rest his soul.
222
00:12:41,440 --> 00:12:45,199
I mean we don't have to go through
with this troubled production.
223
00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:47,439
Fiddlesticks!
224
00:12:47,440 --> 00:12:52,759
We must honour Herman's work
and memory by forging ahead.
225
00:12:52,760 --> 00:12:54,199
It's what he would have wanted.
226
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:57,599
Aren't you forgetting that Herman
was also our stage manager?
227
00:12:57,600 --> 00:12:59,079
Not for a second, Bonnie.
228
00:12:59,080 --> 00:13:01,599
Which is why I'm promoting
you to the position.
229
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:02,959
Thank you.
230
00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:04,319
I'll do my best.
231
00:13:04,320 --> 00:13:08,359
As soon as the police are
done, we get back to work.
232
00:13:08,360 --> 00:13:10,240
We open tomorrow.
233
00:13:24,480 --> 00:13:26,959
You didn't remove police
evidence, did you?
234
00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:28,879
God forgive me.
235
00:13:28,880 --> 00:13:32,559
I thought it rather more
important that you saw it.
236
00:13:32,560 --> 00:13:34,199
BREATHES IN DEEPLY
237
00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:35,559
Intriguing.
238
00:13:35,560 --> 00:13:41,560
I have invited us all here
tonight to unite the family.
239
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:46,399
But now the family,
240
00:13:46,400 --> 00:13:49,199
and indeed my heart,
241
00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:52,439
have been torn apart
242
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:56,520
like an old copy of
the Hambleston Gazette.
243
00:13:57,800 --> 00:14:00,879
Perhaps "ripped" rather than
"torn". What do we all think?
244
00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:03,719
I think you should shut
your trap and get offstage.
245
00:14:03,720 --> 00:14:05,359
Sorry, everyone. Sorry.
246
00:14:05,360 --> 00:14:07,879
Can we please just
get on with it?
247
00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:08,920
Bonnie!
248
00:14:10,720 --> 00:14:12,000
Ding dong!
249
00:14:13,480 --> 00:14:14,759
BELLS RING
250
00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:16,879
I wonder who that could be?
251
00:14:16,880 --> 00:14:18,879
DOOR SLAMS Oh.
252
00:14:18,880 --> 00:14:21,719
Daddy, the Inspector's here.
253
00:14:21,720 --> 00:14:23,679
Then show him in.
254
00:14:23,680 --> 00:14:25,199
Well...
255
00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:27,119
he's not actually here.
256
00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:28,799
I could stand in.
257
00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:30,719
Good grief, no.
258
00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:32,999
Where is Sergeant Goodfellow?
259
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:36,119
I'm in the middle of a murder
investigation at the moment.
260
00:14:36,120 --> 00:14:38,000
Who was the last
person to use this?
261
00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:41,599
I found a spot of blood on it.
262
00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:43,759
Luminol has revealed much more.
263
00:14:43,760 --> 00:14:45,919
Despite an attempt made
to wipe the spanner clean,
264
00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:47,639
we were able to
locate a fingerprint,
265
00:14:47,640 --> 00:14:50,879
so now I need fingerprints
from all of you.
266
00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:54,399
We are in the middle
of a dress rehearsal!
267
00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:56,879
Albeit without any dress.
268
00:14:56,880 --> 00:14:58,199
Could this not wait?
269
00:14:58,200 --> 00:14:59,640
It's my spanner.
270
00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:02,679
I didn't hit him.
271
00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:06,159
Although you were at each
other's throats on a daily basis.
272
00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:07,759
Bonnie Codling,
I'm arresting you
273
00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:10,039
on suspicion of the
murder of Herman Jolly.
274
00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:11,999
You are not obliged
to say anything,
275
00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:14,640
but anything you do say
may be given in evidence.
276
00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:18,880
Could things get any worse?
277
00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:26,359
BONNIE: The Chief Inspector thinks I
went back to the theatre last night,
278
00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:28,999
killed Herman, then locked up.
279
00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:31,999
I'm not the only one with keys.
280
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:35,880
Who else? Just Teddy,
and Emerald, I think.
281
00:15:37,440 --> 00:15:42,279
How long have things been
fractious between you and Mr Jolly?
282
00:15:42,280 --> 00:15:43,719
Only three years.
283
00:15:43,720 --> 00:15:45,999
Ever since I moved from Oxford.
284
00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:48,479
I suppose he reminded
me of my father.
285
00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:50,159
In what way?
286
00:15:50,160 --> 00:15:53,119
He was a sadist and a bully too.
287
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:56,079
It was almost a blessing
when he disowned me.
288
00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:57,960
For any particular reason?
289
00:15:59,680 --> 00:16:01,239
Giving in to sin.
290
00:16:01,240 --> 00:16:02,760
I see.
291
00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:09,839
This was found in
Mr Jolly's pocket.
292
00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:11,319
Cost of materials?
293
00:16:11,320 --> 00:16:13,840
But it couldn't
have cost THIS much.
294
00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:16,999
Well, Teddy would
have been furious.
295
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:18,280
Indeed.
296
00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:21,640
Thank you, Miss Codling.
297
00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:23,840
Very helpful.
298
00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:28,040
What's going to
happen with the play?
299
00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:34,839
Well, important as that is,
you are my main priority
300
00:16:34,840 --> 00:16:36,680
and I will do all I can.
301
00:16:39,680 --> 00:16:41,399
FATHER BROWN KNOCKS ON DOOR
302
00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:44,479
Oh, I've suddenly
come all aquiver.
303
00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:46,319
But why, my love?
304
00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:48,639
Tell me...
305
00:16:48,640 --> 00:16:53,119
Tell me that Bonnie's
release is imminent.
306
00:16:53,120 --> 00:16:57,039
Miss Codling is still
under arrest, I'm afraid.
307
00:16:57,040 --> 00:16:58,879
Perhaps I could step
in the stage manager?
308
00:16:58,880 --> 00:17:00,519
Hmm...
309
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:02,600
I suppose beggars
can't be choosers.
310
00:17:03,560 --> 00:17:06,839
Right, let's pick it up,
everybody. HE CLEARS HIS THROAT
311
00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:08,559
Can't you feel it?
312
00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:11,039
A chill tearing
through the house.
313
00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:15,520
Almost as if the ghost of Horace
was trying to tell us something.
314
00:17:16,680 --> 00:17:18,280
Cue howling wind.
315
00:17:20,360 --> 00:17:22,520
Howling wind. Hello?
316
00:17:24,360 --> 00:17:25,519
Howling wind!
317
00:17:25,520 --> 00:17:27,959
LOUD BANGS AND CRASHES
318
00:17:27,960 --> 00:17:31,559
Um, I'm a bit tied
up at the moment.
319
00:17:31,560 --> 00:17:33,759
I... I give up!
320
00:17:33,760 --> 00:17:35,040
I...
321
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:38,599
Knock, knock.
322
00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:39,960
Go away.
323
00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:44,920
I'm afraid this won't
wait, Mr Sadwick.
324
00:17:46,360 --> 00:17:49,040
You knew what Herman
Jolly was up to.
325
00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:51,640
I trusted him.
326
00:17:53,040 --> 00:17:55,919
Then he cleaned out
the society account.
327
00:17:55,920 --> 00:17:57,880
£2,000.
328
00:17:59,680 --> 00:18:03,239
How did this society come by
such a large amount of money?
329
00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:05,040
I sold my butcher's shop.
330
00:18:06,440 --> 00:18:08,439
That money was my nest egg
331
00:18:08,440 --> 00:18:10,760
and I put it all in one basket.
332
00:18:11,720 --> 00:18:14,079
You confronted him
on the day he died?
333
00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:16,000
Yes, and he grovelled.
334
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:21,159
Do you honestly believe
that I'd do anything
335
00:18:21,160 --> 00:18:23,360
to jeopardise this production?
336
00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:28,879
No, I don't, Mr Sadwick.
337
00:18:28,880 --> 00:18:33,560
All my life I've dreamed of
treading the boards as a pro.
338
00:18:34,920 --> 00:18:36,720
But I never had the guts.
339
00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:43,600
I'm not getting any younger
and this is my last chance.
340
00:18:45,520 --> 00:18:49,799
I've managed to lure an
agent down from London
341
00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:52,159
to see the opening night.
342
00:18:52,160 --> 00:18:56,399
He's not going to come to
just any amateur production.
343
00:18:56,400 --> 00:19:00,439
So you see, Father,
if this play fails,
344
00:19:00,440 --> 00:19:02,479
so do all my dreams.
345
00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:07,040
Then perhaps, Mr Sadwick, you
should proceed with rehearsals.
346
00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:12,119
I understand the
costumes have arrived.
347
00:19:12,120 --> 00:19:13,679
Have they?
348
00:19:13,680 --> 00:19:18,960
Oh. Well, then, Father,
perhaps the day is not lost.
349
00:19:26,320 --> 00:19:31,240
Yes. Yes, I think
that'll do very nicely.
350
00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:33,479
Well done, Emerald.
351
00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:35,439
What did you find
out then, Father?
352
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:39,039
I don't think our director would
risk jeopardising his own play.
353
00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:43,279
However, I do suspect him of
having quite a nasty temper.
354
00:19:43,280 --> 00:19:45,199
MRS DIVINE: Oh, dear.
355
00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:46,839
What about Emerald?
356
00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:47,999
Emerald?
357
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:49,839
I saw the way that
Herman looked at her
358
00:19:49,840 --> 00:19:51,959
when she opened
that birthday card.
359
00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:54,080
Which upset her greatly.
360
00:20:00,640 --> 00:20:03,720
Ah! Suits you, Edgar.
361
00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:07,480
Er, sir?
362
00:20:10,840 --> 00:20:11,880
Er...
363
00:20:13,760 --> 00:20:16,519
Be very careful what
you say, Sergeant.
364
00:20:16,520 --> 00:20:17,719
Sorry, sir.
365
00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:21,519
There is, um, something you
might want to hear, sir,
366
00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:23,040
in private.
367
00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:29,599
I know exactly what you're
looking for, Father.
368
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:31,279
Great minds.
369
00:20:31,280 --> 00:20:33,200
I could do with some help.
370
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:37,000
Oh, dear. What a whiff.
371
00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:43,040
Aha!
372
00:20:45,320 --> 00:20:46,360
Aha!
373
00:20:48,200 --> 00:20:50,359
We do make a good team.
374
00:20:50,360 --> 00:20:54,279
"A very happy birthday,
love from Sandy."
375
00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:56,959
Oh, who is Sandy?
376
00:20:56,960 --> 00:20:58,519
Indeed.
377
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:00,599
However...
378
00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:02,320
same handwriting.
379
00:21:03,360 --> 00:21:04,640
Bingo!
380
00:21:07,880 --> 00:21:08,920
Ah!
381
00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:13,039
Well, what do you think?
382
00:21:13,040 --> 00:21:15,759
I think you both look splendid.
383
00:21:15,760 --> 00:21:16,839
Seconded.
384
00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:19,519
Emerald, you have
surpassed yourself.
385
00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:23,599
Let us just make it the
best it can be, shall we?
386
00:21:23,600 --> 00:21:24,640
Thank you.
387
00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:28,999
Mrs Baptiste, may I have a word?
388
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:30,039
Yes.
389
00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:31,919
I'm afraid that'll
have to wait, Father.
390
00:21:31,920 --> 00:21:34,879
We have some good news
and some bad news.
391
00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:38,120
Oh, for pity's sake, man,
I need some good news.
392
00:21:40,520 --> 00:21:44,679
Er, Miss Codling will be
released this evening.
393
00:21:44,680 --> 00:21:46,479
Praise the Lord.
394
00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:47,759
The day is saved!
395
00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:50,159
And the bad news?
396
00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:53,319
The fingerprint we
found on the spanner
397
00:21:53,320 --> 00:21:56,240
was yours, Mrs Baptiste.
398
00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:59,039
There's no doubt.
399
00:21:59,040 --> 00:22:00,320
Emerald?
400
00:22:01,520 --> 00:22:05,319
I'm sorry for
ruining everything.
401
00:22:05,320 --> 00:22:07,360
But... why?
402
00:22:08,480 --> 00:22:09,800
Can we go now?
403
00:22:12,200 --> 00:22:16,039
This is... This is
a living nightmare.
404
00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:21,159
How am I supposed to cope
without my Fanny Tinkle?
405
00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:24,440
Teddy, all is not
lost. I have an idea.
406
00:22:26,120 --> 00:22:27,639
CHURCH BELLS RING
407
00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:29,039
BRENDA: I think you're mad.
408
00:22:29,040 --> 00:22:30,439
We open tonight.
409
00:22:30,440 --> 00:22:32,319
What other choice do we have?
410
00:22:32,320 --> 00:22:34,399
I know all the lines
411
00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:38,399
and thankfully, Ursula is only
onstage with the maid once.
412
00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:41,119
Right, and how are you going
to make that work, then?
413
00:22:41,120 --> 00:22:43,799
I'm sure Mrs Divine has
an elegant solution.
414
00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:45,439
Thank you, Father.
415
00:22:45,440 --> 00:22:48,279
This play has to be a success
416
00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:52,119
or I'll be the shortest
serving president in history.
417
00:22:52,120 --> 00:22:55,679
Besides which, I want to do
my best for Father Lindsey.
418
00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:57,439
I thought he were t'murderer.
419
00:22:57,440 --> 00:22:59,079
Brenda! What?
420
00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:02,399
He had a key and all. Saw him
lock up with it last night.
421
00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:04,719
Don't be so ridiculous.
422
00:23:04,720 --> 00:23:08,920
Although... why on earth
would Emerald do such a thing?
423
00:23:11,680 --> 00:23:13,199
BOTH: Father?
424
00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:16,160
That, ladies, is what
I intend to find out.
425
00:23:18,040 --> 00:23:20,560
I'll see you both at
the theatre later.
426
00:23:30,040 --> 00:23:31,840
Am I going to hang, Father?
427
00:23:33,160 --> 00:23:34,880
I very much hope not.
428
00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:38,440
Father Lindsey, may I?
429
00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:46,280
Did you attack Mr
Jolly because of this?
430
00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:50,999
Who's Sandy?
431
00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:53,000
Sandy is dead, Father.
432
00:23:54,640 --> 00:23:58,319
He was barely a man when
he came to Hambleston.
433
00:23:58,320 --> 00:24:01,560
An orphan who lived in the
abandoned barn on Chipping Way.
434
00:24:03,120 --> 00:24:06,080
Oh, my skinny little boy!
435
00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:11,119
Who needed me as
much as I needed him.
436
00:24:11,120 --> 00:24:13,000
Did you lose someone?
437
00:24:15,120 --> 00:24:16,440
My son...
438
00:24:17,560 --> 00:24:21,439
and husband, in the last war,
439
00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:23,719
before I came here
on the Windrush.
440
00:24:23,720 --> 00:24:25,039
I'm so sorry.
441
00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:27,760
HADS gave Sandy a purpose.
442
00:24:29,520 --> 00:24:33,079
Bonnie and I used to take
turns to cook for him,
443
00:24:33,080 --> 00:24:38,879
and I even found him a
job delivering for Teddy.
444
00:24:38,880 --> 00:24:40,840
Things were getting better.
445
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:44,879
May we ask how he died?
446
00:24:44,880 --> 00:24:48,319
Last year, during
a HADS meeting.
447
00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:52,679
We all heard a gunshot -
Teddy, Bonnie, Herman and I.
448
00:24:52,680 --> 00:24:56,160
We left the pub and we went to
check on Sandy in his barn and...
449
00:24:57,800 --> 00:25:02,439
there he was on the
ground, still warm.
450
00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:07,719
Oh, he was gone and the murderer
just vanished into the night,
451
00:25:07,720 --> 00:25:09,959
never to be found.
452
00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:11,320
Oh.
453
00:25:13,120 --> 00:25:14,799
Father?
454
00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:16,320
Would you excuse me?
455
00:25:17,520 --> 00:25:19,559
Not feeling too tickety boo.
456
00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:21,280
FATHER LINDSEY KNOCKS ON DOOR
457
00:25:25,640 --> 00:25:28,440
I take it you realised
who sent this?
458
00:25:29,880 --> 00:25:31,919
Yes.
459
00:25:31,920 --> 00:25:33,240
Why torment you?
460
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:37,240
I went to ask him and...
461
00:25:39,560 --> 00:25:45,560
he said I should, "leave HADS
or I might end up like Sandy."
462
00:25:47,080 --> 00:25:52,039
He said he knew who murdered him
and he was glad Sandy was dead
463
00:25:52,040 --> 00:25:54,279
and I don't know why!
464
00:25:54,280 --> 00:25:57,439
He just kept laughing
and laughing,
465
00:25:57,440 --> 00:26:00,120
and I saw red.
466
00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:03,119
And before I knew it, I...
467
00:26:03,120 --> 00:26:04,520
THUD
468
00:26:09,360 --> 00:26:11,760
And then you closed
the compartment?
469
00:26:13,120 --> 00:26:16,160
No. It must have closed itself.
470
00:26:17,240 --> 00:26:21,159
Believe me, Father, I was
going to tell the police
471
00:26:21,160 --> 00:26:22,759
after the play ended.
472
00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:26,319
I'd never let Bonnie take
the blame for my crimes.
473
00:26:26,320 --> 00:26:29,479
Well, you see, that's
it, Mrs Baptiste.
474
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:32,440
I'm not entirely sure
it WAS your crime.
475
00:26:45,120 --> 00:26:49,359
I'm afraid, Father, everything
that's happened, it's...
476
00:26:49,360 --> 00:26:51,120
all my fault.
477
00:26:52,480 --> 00:26:54,400
Oh, dear.
478
00:26:56,040 --> 00:26:58,399
Where the devil is Father Brown?
479
00:26:58,400 --> 00:27:00,439
He'll be here any second.
480
00:27:00,440 --> 00:27:02,479
Father will not let you down.
481
00:27:02,480 --> 00:27:07,279
He'd better not. Everybody,
tonight needs to go
482
00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:09,279
perfectly.
483
00:27:09,280 --> 00:27:12,079
I thought Sandy's
death sounded familiar.
484
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:14,079
My research for the play -
485
00:27:14,080 --> 00:27:16,799
subconsciously, I must
have integrated it.
486
00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:21,679
Inadvertently solving
howdunit on your final page.
487
00:27:21,680 --> 00:27:25,120
Consider the hooks on the wall
and the trajectory of the bullet.
488
00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:29,439
Mr Jolly's reaction now
makes perfect sense.
489
00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:31,879
At least it wasn't the
quality of my writing.
490
00:27:31,880 --> 00:27:35,839
Herman Jolly killed Sandy
with a pre-set mechanism.
491
00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:39,639
The perfect murder
indeed. Well done, Father.
492
00:27:39,640 --> 00:27:41,879
I'm not feeling especially
proud at the moment.
493
00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:45,519
My play may be exceptional, but
a man is dead and Mrs Baptiste
494
00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:47,679
is facing the noose. No.
495
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:49,599
Someone else is responsible.
496
00:27:49,600 --> 00:27:51,999
When Herman Jolly's
body was discovered,
497
00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:54,680
the door to the
compartment was jammed.
498
00:27:55,920 --> 00:27:57,600
And there was this.
499
00:28:00,360 --> 00:28:02,919
Ah! Stage make-up.
500
00:28:02,920 --> 00:28:05,279
Ah!
501
00:28:05,280 --> 00:28:09,519
Greasepaint was used
to seal the air vent.
502
00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:13,879
So Herman Jolly asphyxiated
after the assault.
503
00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:15,800
But why?
504
00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:20,279
Oh, dear.
505
00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:22,160
Sandy was from Oxford.
506
00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:29,680
BUZZER RINGS Crumbs. The play!
507
00:28:34,080 --> 00:28:35,559
Apologies. Apologies!
508
00:28:35,560 --> 00:28:38,839
Good God, man, are you trying to
give me a heart attack? Daddy!
509
00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:42,399
Sh! Calm, remember? Yes, yes.
510
00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:44,319
Calm, everyone.
511
00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:46,679
Tallyho!
512
00:28:46,680 --> 00:28:50,040
And break a leg.
Metaphorically speaking.
513
00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:54,640
AUDIENCE APPLAUDS
514
00:29:02,360 --> 00:29:04,000
HE CLEARS HIS THROAT
515
00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:07,919
I would like, if I
may, to present to you
516
00:29:07,920 --> 00:29:10,999
the story of a most
diabolical family,
517
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:14,839
and indeed, the
most perfect murder.
518
00:29:14,840 --> 00:29:18,039
DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS
519
00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:23,559
I know full well why you have
invited me here this evening.
520
00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:26,399
Pounds, shillings and pence -
521
00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:29,199
that's all I am to you lot.
522
00:29:29,200 --> 00:29:33,359
Dear brother, no! No, Uncle!
523
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:37,479
You mean the world to
us. Horace, I love you!
524
00:29:37,480 --> 00:29:38,999
Oh!
525
00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:40,159
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
526
00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:42,079
Purely as a brother in law.
527
00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:46,279
I'm quite sure your considerable
wealth is immaterial to the family.
528
00:29:46,280 --> 00:29:52,280
In that case, none of you will ever
see a penny of my money ever again.
529
00:29:53,960 --> 00:29:56,039
DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS
530
00:29:56,040 --> 00:29:57,400
Oh!
531
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:00,560
It's all going so well!
532
00:30:10,240 --> 00:30:11,639
GUNSHOT
533
00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:13,039
GASPS
534
00:30:13,040 --> 00:30:14,719
Horace? Are you... Oh!
535
00:30:14,720 --> 00:30:15,919
Oh!
536
00:30:15,920 --> 00:30:18,959
SHE SCREAMS My
dear, dear brother!
537
00:30:18,960 --> 00:30:21,759
But where is the murderer?!
538
00:30:21,760 --> 00:30:25,079
How could they
disappear into thin air?
539
00:30:25,080 --> 00:30:27,679
This all made sense to you,
didn't it, when you read
540
00:30:27,680 --> 00:30:31,680
the final page? I'm
sorry? How Sandy died.
541
00:30:33,360 --> 00:30:36,320
PRIEST PRAYS
542
00:30:37,640 --> 00:30:40,999
Oh, to think that my uncle will
never move another muscle...
543
00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:43,080
AUDIENCE LAUGHS again.
544
00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:48,879
But now...
545
00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:52,319
I really wish that you
hadn't said anything.
546
00:30:52,320 --> 00:30:54,079
I've been torn apart.
547
00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:56,639
You will have to
stage manage now.
548
00:30:56,640 --> 00:30:58,479
Have faith, Father.
549
00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:00,479
Of the old copy of the amnesty.
550
00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:02,319
Me?!
551
00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:04,320
Oh, dear.
552
00:31:13,240 --> 00:31:16,319
Where's Mrs Tinkle,
that maid of yours?
553
00:31:16,320 --> 00:31:18,839
I could murder a cup of tea.
554
00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:23,559
Um, perhaps, dear wife,
555
00:31:23,560 --> 00:31:27,279
you could go and get Fanny.
556
00:31:27,280 --> 00:31:31,360
Oh, yes. I shall
do exactly that.
557
00:31:40,360 --> 00:31:41,719
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
558
00:31:41,720 --> 00:31:43,799
Tea for the inspector.
559
00:31:43,800 --> 00:31:45,519
Have a biscuit and all.
560
00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:48,000
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
561
00:32:31,880 --> 00:32:34,359
Hello, Bonnie.
562
00:32:34,360 --> 00:32:37,639
I have to go now,
Father. Of course.
563
00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:41,520
But first you had to come
and say goodbye to your son.
564
00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:47,519
Well, then, Father, I know you're
itching to tell me what's what.
565
00:32:47,520 --> 00:32:49,320
Yes. Pray tell.
566
00:32:50,760 --> 00:32:56,240
Guided by God, I have surmised that
someone here must be responsible.
567
00:32:57,320 --> 00:32:59,719
WIND BLOWS
568
00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:02,279
But how, I hear you ask...
569
00:33:02,280 --> 00:33:03,519
GLASS SMASHES
570
00:33:03,520 --> 00:33:06,439
when everyone was together
during that fateful storm?
571
00:33:06,440 --> 00:33:09,719
It is quite simply, the
most perfect murder.
572
00:33:09,720 --> 00:33:13,399
AUDIENCE APPLAUDS AND CHEERS
573
00:33:13,400 --> 00:33:15,159
Where's Father Brown?
574
00:33:15,160 --> 00:33:17,479
He made me look more of a
fool than I already feel.
575
00:33:17,480 --> 00:33:19,119
Edgar, I have no idea!
576
00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:20,879
I'm going to kill him.
577
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:22,319
And Bonnie.
578
00:33:22,320 --> 00:33:24,120
And you!
579
00:33:25,920 --> 00:33:30,720
Yesterday, you talked
about giving in to sin.
580
00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:37,040
Was Sandy taken
from you as a baby?
581
00:33:38,920 --> 00:33:42,919
I assumed three years ago you
heard he'd come to Hambleston.
582
00:33:42,920 --> 00:33:46,399
So you followed him
here from Oxford
583
00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:50,879
and joined HADS to
get to know your son.
584
00:33:50,880 --> 00:33:54,079
A life of children's homes.
585
00:33:54,080 --> 00:33:56,359
And then he ran away.
586
00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:59,199
What chance did he have, Father?
587
00:33:59,200 --> 00:34:01,279
He had no-one.
588
00:34:01,280 --> 00:34:05,159
He had you, and Mrs Baptiste...
589
00:34:05,160 --> 00:34:10,000
until Mr Jolly intervened. For
what reason, I'm not quite sure.
590
00:34:11,080 --> 00:34:16,399
When I saw his reaction to the
mechanism on the final page,
591
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:19,559
I came back here, saw the hooks,
592
00:34:19,560 --> 00:34:21,879
and found where the gun was.
593
00:34:21,880 --> 00:34:25,640
I knew he'd killed my boy.
594
00:34:28,160 --> 00:34:30,880
GUNSHOT
595
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:38,639
When I confronted Herman,
he was already in a bad way.
596
00:34:38,640 --> 00:34:41,159
He didn't even deny it.
597
00:34:41,160 --> 00:34:43,519
What's it to you, anyway?
598
00:34:43,520 --> 00:34:45,519
He was my son.
599
00:34:45,520 --> 00:34:48,879
Hah! Ha, ha, ha! He
was a little snake,
600
00:34:48,880 --> 00:34:52,079
that's what he was.
What? Spying on me.
601
00:34:52,080 --> 00:34:54,759
Saw my hand in the
till at Teddy's.
602
00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:56,839
He was going to grass.
603
00:34:56,840 --> 00:34:59,159
So you killed him for THAT?
604
00:34:59,160 --> 00:35:02,279
He deserved everything he got.
605
00:35:02,280 --> 00:35:05,560
And guess who I told
Teddy the thief was?
606
00:35:07,760 --> 00:35:09,879
Uh! It appears I need a doctor.
607
00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:11,720
Chop, chop, woman.
608
00:35:13,800 --> 00:35:16,079
What are you doing?!
609
00:35:16,080 --> 00:35:19,079
Let me out! Open this door!
610
00:35:19,080 --> 00:35:21,120
What are you doing?!
611
00:35:24,040 --> 00:35:27,679
I take it that you removed the
greasepaint in the morning?
612
00:35:27,680 --> 00:35:28,920
Tried to.
613
00:35:30,920 --> 00:35:34,039
I just knew my boy
wasn't a thief.
614
00:35:34,040 --> 00:35:37,959
Did Sandy know who you were? No.
615
00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:40,759
Because I'm ashamed, Father,
616
00:35:40,760 --> 00:35:43,319
of what I let happen to me.
617
00:35:43,320 --> 00:35:47,079
I'd never told
anyone he was my son.
618
00:35:47,080 --> 00:35:52,959
And because of my cowardice,
he never knew he was loved.
619
00:35:52,960 --> 00:35:55,879
I think he did.
620
00:35:55,880 --> 00:35:57,760
Very much loved.
621
00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:03,199
At least now I have
justice for my boy.
622
00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:05,440
But what will I do now, Father?
623
00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:09,479
Well, you have to
repent of this murder.
624
00:36:09,480 --> 00:36:11,679
Go to the police and confess.
625
00:36:11,680 --> 00:36:14,160
I'm not sorry that man is dead.
626
00:36:16,040 --> 00:36:19,359
I can never repent
for what I've done.
627
00:36:19,360 --> 00:36:21,999
If you want to be
truly at peace,
628
00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:25,519
and to see Sandy again one day,
629
00:36:25,520 --> 00:36:29,000
it is exactly what you must do.
630
00:36:32,920 --> 00:36:33,960
JAUNTY PIANO PLAYS
631
00:36:38,120 --> 00:36:41,679
My darling girl, why
are you wearing that?
632
00:36:41,680 --> 00:36:44,759
Because I've
realised, haven't I,
633
00:36:44,760 --> 00:36:47,799
that Uncle Horace
was a bachelor?
634
00:36:47,800 --> 00:36:52,119
So who is most likely to
inherit his spondulicks?
635
00:36:52,120 --> 00:36:56,080
Who? Well, he didn't
much care for you.
636
00:36:59,320 --> 00:37:01,519
IN COCKNEY ACCENT: Are
you quite sure about that?
637
00:37:01,520 --> 00:37:02,799
LAUGHTER
638
00:37:02,800 --> 00:37:06,879
I'll thank you to keep your
opinions to yourself, Fanny.
639
00:37:06,880 --> 00:37:10,639
Me, Mummy, I'm going to be rich.
640
00:37:10,640 --> 00:37:12,800
Richer than my wildest dreams.
641
00:37:15,760 --> 00:37:17,000
CHARLESTON MUSIC PLAYS
642
00:37:20,040 --> 00:37:21,999
RECORDS SCRATCHES
643
00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:25,040
TEMPO CHANGES
644
00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:30,199
RECORD SCRATCHES
645
00:37:30,200 --> 00:37:32,359
LAUGHTER
646
00:37:32,360 --> 00:37:38,360
Behold, I have recreated
the most perfect murder.
647
00:37:39,480 --> 00:37:42,119
This is never going to work.
648
00:37:42,120 --> 00:37:44,639
Inspector, please, if you will.
649
00:37:44,640 --> 00:37:46,320
Here we go, Father.
650
00:37:48,160 --> 00:37:49,839
GUNSHOT
651
00:37:49,840 --> 00:37:51,160
ROPE WHISTLES
652
00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:58,239
And where did I
get the gun from?
653
00:37:58,240 --> 00:38:01,519
Your study, Lord Etherington.
654
00:38:01,520 --> 00:38:03,759
THEY GASP
655
00:38:03,760 --> 00:38:05,719
I was framed.
656
00:38:05,720 --> 00:38:08,439
I think not.
657
00:38:08,440 --> 00:38:11,439
You are the one who invited
everyone here this evening.
658
00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:14,519
You've been on your
uppers for some time.
659
00:38:14,520 --> 00:38:17,279
Your only option was
to kill your brother
660
00:38:17,280 --> 00:38:18,879
for your inheritance,
661
00:38:18,880 --> 00:38:22,999
providing yourself with
the most perfect alibi -
662
00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:24,919
myself.
663
00:38:24,920 --> 00:38:30,839
But you did not count on my
God-given detection prowess.
664
00:38:30,840 --> 00:38:34,319
All right, yes, I admit it.
665
00:38:34,320 --> 00:38:37,039
Just spare my family.
666
00:38:37,040 --> 00:38:39,199
I acted alone.
667
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:42,839
Must be nice for him to
get it right for once.
668
00:38:42,840 --> 00:38:48,599
And now you must repent for
the sake of your immortal soul.
669
00:38:48,600 --> 00:38:51,199
And that, ladies and gentlemen,
670
00:38:51,200 --> 00:38:57,200
concludes this evening's
most imperfect murder.
671
00:38:57,880 --> 00:38:59,839
PIANO PLAYS
672
00:38:59,840 --> 00:39:04,800
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
673
00:39:11,840 --> 00:39:13,280
Oh, my!
674
00:39:14,600 --> 00:39:15,800
They love me!
675
00:39:29,400 --> 00:39:31,999
CORK POPS, CHEERING
676
00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:35,919
My whole life is about
to change for ever.
677
00:39:35,920 --> 00:39:38,599
There was an agent
out there tonight.
678
00:39:38,600 --> 00:39:42,039
Oh! We must invite him
backstage immediately.
679
00:39:42,040 --> 00:39:43,679
I'm afraid he's just left.
680
00:39:43,680 --> 00:39:45,719
Oh. What did he say?
681
00:39:45,720 --> 00:39:47,559
He said the play was a hoot.
682
00:39:47,560 --> 00:39:51,599
Ah. A new genre of
comedy murder mystery.
683
00:39:51,600 --> 00:39:54,039
But it wasn't meant
to be a comedy.
684
00:39:54,040 --> 00:39:56,639
What did he say about me?
685
00:39:56,640 --> 00:40:00,240
He said your performance
was tragically...
686
00:40:01,520 --> 00:40:03,119
Yes?
687
00:40:03,120 --> 00:40:04,160
Comic.
688
00:40:07,280 --> 00:40:08,440
Ah.
689
00:40:15,360 --> 00:40:17,960
Er, could I propose a toast?
690
00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:21,080
To Sandy.
691
00:40:22,320 --> 00:40:24,640
To Sandy. Sandy. Sandy. Sandy.
692
00:40:25,600 --> 00:40:30,000
Who, I'd like you all
to know, was my son.
693
00:40:34,320 --> 00:40:36,080
And I have to go now.
694
00:40:37,160 --> 00:40:40,320
Where? Chief Inspector,
can I have a word?
695
00:40:41,400 --> 00:40:42,640
Certainly.
696
00:40:43,960 --> 00:40:45,240
Would you?
697
00:40:53,160 --> 00:40:54,400
Look who I found.
698
00:40:55,920 --> 00:40:57,640
Well, Emerald...
699
00:40:59,680 --> 00:41:02,679
turns out you were right.
700
00:41:02,680 --> 00:41:05,839
I've really put the
ham into Hambleston.
701
00:41:05,840 --> 00:41:08,319
I'm pulling the show.
702
00:41:08,320 --> 00:41:13,279
Except we're sold out
every night this week.
703
00:41:13,280 --> 00:41:15,999
What? The show
is a hit, Teddy.
704
00:41:16,000 --> 00:41:18,879
Word of mouth, apparently.
705
00:41:18,880 --> 00:41:23,599
Although how we could recreate
that performance, I'll never know.
706
00:41:23,600 --> 00:41:25,439
So they're coming
to laugh at me?
707
00:41:25,440 --> 00:41:28,560
Well, you must have
been very entertaining.
708
00:41:29,560 --> 00:41:31,040
Maybe that's enough.
709
00:41:32,440 --> 00:41:34,720
Maybe. Hmm.
710
00:41:36,880 --> 00:41:40,599
Will you take it back, HADS?
711
00:41:40,600 --> 00:41:43,640
Only if we can work
together this time.
712
00:41:48,120 --> 00:41:51,399
Oh, well, that's just lovely.
713
00:41:51,400 --> 00:41:55,079
Although you and I will be going
our separate ways, won't we?
714
00:41:55,080 --> 00:41:58,599
With the greatest of
pleasure, Mrs Devine.
715
00:41:58,600 --> 00:42:00,800
And my sincere thanks.
716
00:42:12,160 --> 00:42:13,919
Bless me, Father,
for I have sinned.
717
00:42:13,920 --> 00:42:17,039
It has been three days
since my last confession.
718
00:42:17,040 --> 00:42:19,559
Since then, I have been
instrumental in one murder
719
00:42:19,560 --> 00:42:21,960
and an unfortunate
incarceration.
720
00:42:23,800 --> 00:42:25,879
I feel quite wretched.
721
00:42:25,880 --> 00:42:27,719
You are not responsible.
722
00:42:27,720 --> 00:42:31,519
You shone light onto
a distressing mystery,
723
00:42:31,520 --> 00:42:33,040
and it was solved.
724
00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:36,560
That is kind of you to say.
725
00:42:37,760 --> 00:42:40,839
But these past few days have
made me realise that murder
726
00:42:40,840 --> 00:42:42,880
is never to be taken lightly.
727
00:42:44,320 --> 00:42:45,800
An important lesson.
728
00:42:48,360 --> 00:42:49,999
They say never meet
your heroes, Father,
729
00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:52,279
but in your case,
I'm very glad I did.
730
00:42:52,280 --> 00:42:54,960
You're not at all
like my uncle said.
731
00:42:56,040 --> 00:42:57,199
Uncle?
732
00:42:57,200 --> 00:42:59,199
Whom I believe you
know quite well.
733
00:42:59,200 --> 00:43:01,879
Actually, he used to tread
the boards in the Footlights
734
00:43:01,880 --> 00:43:03,640
long before he was canon.
735
00:43:05,360 --> 00:43:06,839
Canon Fox?
736
00:43:06,840 --> 00:43:08,199
He asked me to let you know that
737
00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:09,960
he'll be checking
in on you very soon.
738
00:43:11,480 --> 00:43:13,879
I look forward to that.
739
00:43:13,880 --> 00:43:16,320
I think I'll stick to my
vocation for the moment.
740
00:43:17,960 --> 00:43:19,359
Indeed.
741
00:43:19,360 --> 00:43:21,959
It transpires that I'm not an
exceptional playwright after all,
742
00:43:21,960 --> 00:43:24,999
though I do seem to have a
talent for this sleuthing lark.
743
00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:30,280
Perhaps you should devote yourself
to your flock... for the time being.
744
00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:32,840
Righto, Father.
745
00:43:33,800 --> 00:43:37,159
I do hope the next time we
meet is much less eventful.
746
00:43:37,160 --> 00:43:39,760
Yes, Father.
747
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:42,640
Amen to that.53007
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