Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,561 --> 00:00:04,561
[bells jingling]
2
00:00:04,567 --> 00:00:05,991
[belches]
3
00:00:06,072 --> 00:00:07,404
?
4
00:00:07,409 --> 00:00:08,666
D'oh!
5
00:00:08,747 --> 00:00:10,930
[barking]
6
00:00:11,012 --> 00:00:12,237
[grunts]
7
00:00:16,530 --> 00:00:18,464
?
8
00:00:23,309 --> 00:00:24,809
?
9
00:00:24,889 --> 00:00:27,966
? Bowl me to the moon ?
10
00:00:27,974 --> 00:00:31,900
? And roll me to the stars ?
11
00:00:31,987 --> 00:00:33,169
? Hey ?
12
00:00:33,248 --> 00:00:35,915
? This is more
than just a game ?
13
00:00:35,999 --> 00:00:39,758
? For big fat dopes in bars ?
14
00:00:39,759 --> 00:00:40,847
? No ?
15
00:00:40,848 --> 00:00:43,031
? For lazy guys ?
16
00:00:43,112 --> 00:00:45,446
? This is a sport ?
17
00:00:45,528 --> 00:00:48,096
? Doo bap,
doo boop bee boo wow ?
18
00:00:49,847 --> 00:00:51,898
[pins clatter]
19
00:00:51,899 --> 00:00:53,215
It's today.
20
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:54,310
It's today!
21
00:00:54,390 --> 00:00:56,481
-What day is it?
-Saturday.
22
00:00:56,563 --> 00:00:57,713
It's today!
23
00:00:58,828 --> 00:01:01,346
[exclaims weakly]
24
00:01:03,694 --> 00:01:05,360
[swallows]
Whoopie.
25
00:01:05,441 --> 00:01:07,758
Move over Los Angeles
and Philadelphia.
26
00:01:07,765 --> 00:01:11,450
It's Springfield's turn
to have its drunken sports fans
27
00:01:11,610 --> 00:01:14,778
climb streetlights
and burn down the town.
28
00:01:14,787 --> 00:01:17,621
That's right, finally,
after years of phantom fouls
29
00:01:17,629 --> 00:01:18,979
and butt fumbles,
30
00:01:19,134 --> 00:01:22,893
one of our beloved local
sports teams, the "Pin Pals,"
31
00:01:22,903 --> 00:01:24,893
have made it
to the state championship.
32
00:01:24,909 --> 00:01:28,095
With Springfield's years
of failure at sports, the arts,
33
00:01:28,178 --> 00:01:30,679
and our disastrous toddler
boxing tournament,
34
00:01:30,762 --> 00:01:34,614
it's no exaggeration to say
that our "Super Bowlers" are
35
00:01:34,699 --> 00:01:38,576
garnering tremendous
pin-terest. [chuckling]
36
00:01:38,577 --> 00:01:39,697
?
37
00:01:39,698 --> 00:01:40,748
? Yeah! ?
38
00:01:43,300 --> 00:01:44,375
? Yeah! ?
39
00:01:44,380 --> 00:01:47,064
Finally, strikes I can support.
40
00:01:47,065 --> 00:01:48,148
[cheering]
41
00:01:48,149 --> 00:01:50,019
Mayor, you've been
accused of being
42
00:01:50,064 --> 00:01:52,081
a fair-weather fan
for this team.
43
00:01:52,161 --> 00:01:53,252
Not true.
44
00:01:53,332 --> 00:01:55,999
I am a dyed-in-the-wool
fan of these...
45
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:57,102
[quietly]
Bowlers.
46
00:01:57,103 --> 00:01:59,010
Bowlers?! Really?
47
00:01:59,034 --> 00:02:00,608
People still do that?
48
00:02:00,609 --> 00:02:03,864
So you don't mind that they say
you're jumping on the bandwagon?
49
00:02:03,865 --> 00:02:07,717
Let me just say, no one jumps
later or harder than I.
50
00:02:07,803 --> 00:02:11,397
To the Pin Heads,
eh... Pin Pals.
51
00:02:12,559 --> 00:02:14,669
[playing
"For He's a Jolly Good Fellow"]
52
00:02:15,753 --> 00:02:20,664
[announcer] And now,
your heroes, the Pin Pals.
53
00:02:20,665 --> 00:02:21,678
[cheering]
54
00:02:21,679 --> 00:02:23,771
[chuckles]
How you doing?
55
00:02:23,853 --> 00:02:25,186
Marry me!
56
00:02:25,265 --> 00:02:26,690
Oh, yeah. Sure, sure.
57
00:02:26,770 --> 00:02:28,937
Anyhoo, I could never
have made it
58
00:02:28,961 --> 00:02:32,946
without my very good friends,
Homer, Carl, Flanders,
59
00:02:33,031 --> 00:02:36,958
and that new guy from Portugal
whose, uh, name I forget.
60
00:02:37,044 --> 00:02:38,944
[speaking Portuguese]
61
00:02:43,840 --> 00:02:45,732
Yi-yo-yu!
62
00:02:45,738 --> 00:02:47,070
[cheering]
63
00:02:47,071 --> 00:02:49,080
He don't speak
the good English or nothing,
64
00:02:49,081 --> 00:02:51,081
but he sure as hell
can roll strikes.
65
00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:55,090
And he's got a very hot sister,
or girlfriend, or mother...
66
00:02:55,100 --> 00:02:56,625
It's really hard to tell.
67
00:02:59,038 --> 00:03:00,370
Eu te amo.
68
00:03:00,371 --> 00:03:01,879
All right.
Based on my experience,
69
00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:03,305
that is not his mother.
70
00:03:03,384 --> 00:03:07,053
Uh, I just want to say, we
aren't just doing this for us.
71
00:03:07,138 --> 00:03:10,990
It is going to mean the world
to this entire town.
72
00:03:11,075 --> 00:03:12,741
Excuse me, but I don't see
73
00:03:12,764 --> 00:03:15,340
how the town possibly
benefits from this.
74
00:03:15,422 --> 00:03:16,622
We'd be helped a lot more
75
00:03:16,759 --> 00:03:19,018
by a traffic light
on Elm Street.
76
00:03:19,100 --> 00:03:20,508
[booing]
77
00:03:20,513 --> 00:03:23,438
Smack him with his bone!
Smack him good!
78
00:03:23,523 --> 00:03:25,447
Uh, my friends and neighbors-
79
00:03:25,529 --> 00:03:26,803
Reluctant neighbors.
80
00:03:26,883 --> 00:03:31,144
[stammers] I'd just like us
to, uh, bow our heads,
81
00:03:31,230 --> 00:03:32,896
-and thank-
-Stupid Flanders.
82
00:03:32,977 --> 00:03:34,886
Turns everything good
into church.
83
00:03:34,892 --> 00:03:37,409
Just once,
can you not mention God?
84
00:03:37,491 --> 00:03:40,234
All righty, then,
let me just s-say way to go,
85
00:03:40,241 --> 00:03:41,849
Big Guy in the Sky.
86
00:03:41,930 --> 00:03:45,432
[both]
And his son, Jesus Christ. Amen.
87
00:03:45,516 --> 00:03:47,516
Jesus is God's rod.
88
00:03:47,598 --> 00:03:50,766
[mocking laugh]
Jesus is God's rod.
89
00:03:50,775 --> 00:03:52,274
[chuckles] Blasphemy.
90
00:03:53,282 --> 00:03:57,968
And now, O captain,
my captain, Homer Simpson.
91
00:03:58,055 --> 00:03:59,797
[whooping]
92
00:03:59,803 --> 00:04:02,412
There's one word
that defines this team.
93
00:04:02,495 --> 00:04:05,237
And that word isn't "can"
or "might."
94
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:09,172
That word is, uh, wait a minute.
95
00:04:09,257 --> 00:04:11,015
Cards out of order...
96
00:04:11,096 --> 00:04:13,096
Can't read my own writing here.
97
00:04:13,102 --> 00:04:15,361
Oh, okay, it's "will."
98
00:04:15,518 --> 00:04:17,752
Yes, we will!
99
00:04:19,455 --> 00:04:21,473
[chanting]
Let's go Pin Pals.
100
00:04:21,554 --> 00:04:23,479
Win that title.
101
00:04:23,561 --> 00:04:26,045
Win that title!
102
00:04:26,052 --> 00:04:30,621
-Let's get pickles.
-Let's get pickles.
103
00:04:30,622 --> 00:04:32,905
All right folks, break it up.
104
00:04:32,906 --> 00:04:35,136
Unless you're jerkin'
a gherkin, go on home.
105
00:04:38,106 --> 00:04:39,422
[happy groaning]
106
00:04:39,426 --> 00:04:42,761
Oh, Homie.
Today was magnificent.
107
00:04:42,787 --> 00:04:45,029
I always thought
bowling was just an excuse
108
00:04:45,111 --> 00:04:48,278
to get away from the kids
and drink a lot of beer.
109
00:04:48,287 --> 00:04:51,063
What? No. Never. What?
110
00:04:51,146 --> 00:04:54,297
But now it's made
the whole town proud of you.
111
00:04:54,306 --> 00:04:56,398
And I'm part of the town,
112
00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:58,071
so this comes from the heart.
113
00:04:58,152 --> 00:05:00,835
Ugh, I can't say it.
I don't want to say it.
114
00:05:00,836 --> 00:05:02,832
You can't make me say it,
and I won't say it.
115
00:05:02,833 --> 00:05:04,332
Or even think it!
116
00:05:04,337 --> 00:05:05,737
Aw, thank you, son.
117
00:05:06,788 --> 00:05:08,937
I love you all. Water my plants.
118
00:05:09,019 --> 00:05:10,776
You don't have any plants.
119
00:05:10,858 --> 00:05:12,716
Then we're good. Bye.
120
00:05:18,215 --> 00:05:19,698
?
121
00:05:26,423 --> 00:05:27,906
Ain't this the life?
122
00:05:27,912 --> 00:05:29,261
Whirly birding,
123
00:05:29,265 --> 00:05:31,916
full can of soda,
two bags of peanuts.
124
00:05:31,924 --> 00:05:33,423
I've never known such luxury.
125
00:05:33,428 --> 00:05:35,595
I could die right now
a happy man.
126
00:05:35,596 --> 00:05:37,624
[Barney]
This is your captain speaking.
127
00:05:37,625 --> 00:05:39,775
Please buckle up
as we attempt to clear
128
00:05:39,782 --> 00:05:41,390
the treacherous mountain peak.
129
00:05:41,470 --> 00:05:42,552
Wha-?!
130
00:05:43,886 --> 00:05:47,322
No worries. Every chopper
in town takes this route.
131
00:05:51,911 --> 00:05:53,670
[alarm buzzing]
132
00:05:54,603 --> 00:05:57,846
Overweight?
How is that possible?
133
00:05:57,929 --> 00:06:01,857
Pilot, five passengers,
five 14-pound balls...
134
00:06:01,942 --> 00:06:03,793
Uh, I wanted
a little extra oomph,
135
00:06:03,948 --> 00:06:06,541
so I actually brought
a 16-pound ball.
136
00:06:06,624 --> 00:06:10,476
Me, too. By which I mean
I brought two 16-pound balls.
137
00:06:10,561 --> 00:06:12,895
Anyone else want to brag
about their balls?
138
00:06:12,977 --> 00:06:14,327
I mean, seriously?
139
00:06:14,407 --> 00:06:17,316
Fausto bring this.
For good luck.
140
00:06:17,324 --> 00:06:19,508
Yi-yo-yu!
141
00:06:21,579 --> 00:06:24,022
I'm gonna have to put her
down on the mountain.
142
00:06:24,103 --> 00:06:26,321
Of all the times to be sober.
143
00:06:27,949 --> 00:06:29,540
[both whimpering]
144
00:06:29,621 --> 00:06:31,838
This could be it.
145
00:06:33,784 --> 00:06:35,559
At least I can say goodbye.
146
00:06:35,640 --> 00:06:37,457
-[Marge] Hello?
-Marge...
147
00:06:37,463 --> 00:06:40,630
We're not home now,
so please don't rob us.
148
00:06:40,638 --> 00:06:41,895
Leave a message.
149
00:06:41,976 --> 00:06:44,977
[pants] Listen, Marge,
we've had our arguments,
150
00:06:45,003 --> 00:06:47,670
we've had our things,
but thank God I have the time
151
00:06:47,753 --> 00:06:49,419
to tell you how I really feel...
152
00:06:49,500 --> 00:06:51,610
-[automated voice] Mailbox full.
-D'oh!
153
00:06:51,673 --> 00:06:53,532
[alarm continues buzzing]
154
00:06:55,184 --> 00:06:57,114
-[alarm wailing]
-[all exclaiming]
155
00:07:02,649 --> 00:07:03,982
Whee! Ah!
156
00:07:09,228 --> 00:07:12,153
As your captain,
one thing is clear:
157
00:07:12,238 --> 00:07:13,904
we must get off this mountain.
158
00:07:13,909 --> 00:07:15,576
And I'm no expert on mountains,
159
00:07:15,582 --> 00:07:18,191
but I say down is this way.
160
00:07:20,597 --> 00:07:21,954
D'oh!
161
00:07:25,294 --> 00:07:26,511
D'oh!
162
00:07:28,487 --> 00:07:31,797
-What the...?
-[satellite beeping]
163
00:07:31,798 --> 00:07:33,319
[Carl]
I wouldn't leave just yet, Homer.
164
00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:35,746
Our new friend there
still hasn't woken up.
165
00:07:35,903 --> 00:07:38,236
Oh, God!
Spanish-what's-his-name.
166
00:07:38,319 --> 00:07:41,178
It's Portuguese-what's-his-name,
you idiot.
167
00:07:41,772 --> 00:07:42,846
[Marge]
Chief?
168
00:07:42,925 --> 00:07:45,167
-Is there any word?
-'Fraid not.
169
00:07:45,174 --> 00:07:47,858
Apparently they knocked out
a cell phone tower
170
00:07:47,941 --> 00:07:49,106
on the way down.
171
00:07:49,186 --> 00:07:52,020
Wait, wait!
Uh, now we're getting somewhere.
172
00:07:52,028 --> 00:07:53,303
Yeah.
173
00:07:54,293 --> 00:07:57,220
Oh, thank God, man.
I was starting to lose all hope.
174
00:07:57,221 --> 00:07:59,140
[Italian accent]
Oh, you hungry cops
175
00:07:59,141 --> 00:08:00,717
put-a my kids through college.
176
00:08:00,723 --> 00:08:03,832
Seven-a sisters.
Not the women's colleges.
177
00:08:03,916 --> 00:08:05,508
I have-a seven daughters:
178
00:08:05,587 --> 00:08:08,663
Gia, Mia, Pia, Tia, Zia,
179
00:08:08,748 --> 00:08:11,431
Iphigenia, and then Emily,
for some reason.
180
00:08:11,514 --> 00:08:12,572
I don't know.
181
00:08:14,114 --> 00:08:16,522
Hmm, still barely breathing.
182
00:08:16,606 --> 00:08:19,215
[sighs] If the Lord could
carry His cross,
183
00:08:19,222 --> 00:08:21,447
I can carry this poor soul.
184
00:08:21,454 --> 00:08:23,454
[Homer]
Huh? Well, look at that.
185
00:08:23,460 --> 00:08:27,070
Flanders risking his own life
to save another.
186
00:08:27,155 --> 00:08:28,205
Wow.
187
00:08:28,232 --> 00:08:30,491
Homer, could you get
my water bottle?
188
00:08:30,573 --> 00:08:32,048
No.
189
00:08:35,681 --> 00:08:37,131
-[phone ringing]
-A phone!
190
00:08:37,132 --> 00:08:38,430
Someone's got cell service.
191
00:08:38,431 --> 00:08:40,023
Hello, Moe speaking.
192
00:08:40,104 --> 00:08:42,029
Hi, I'm looking
for a Mr. Simpson.
193
00:08:42,110 --> 00:08:43,518
First name, Homer.
194
00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:45,189
Oh, I recognize that voice.
195
00:08:45,190 --> 00:08:46,790
You ever call me again.
you little puke,
196
00:08:46,791 --> 00:08:50,310
I'm gonna cut you up, use your
intestines as violin strings,
197
00:08:50,311 --> 00:08:52,215
and play
"Flight of the Bumblebee!"
198
00:08:52,216 --> 00:08:54,808
I'm gonna go
Rimsky-Korsakov on yas.
199
00:08:54,892 --> 00:08:57,150
I'm just trying to find my dad.
200
00:08:57,232 --> 00:08:59,416
Yeah, right.
Try looking in hell, hell boy!
201
00:08:59,497 --> 00:09:01,239
[Bart over phone]
Ay caramba!
202
00:09:01,245 --> 00:09:02,761
Moe, you idiot!
203
00:09:02,841 --> 00:09:05,192
You were the only one
with cellular service.
204
00:09:05,274 --> 00:09:08,516
[exclaims] What have I done?
Me and my anger issues.
205
00:09:08,601 --> 00:09:11,618
Dr. Rubenstein's gonna be
so disappointed.
206
00:09:11,702 --> 00:09:13,261
[grunts]
207
00:09:14,210 --> 00:09:15,876
[muttering]
Stupid avalanche.
208
00:09:15,958 --> 00:09:18,233
[line ringing, beeps]
209
00:09:18,234 --> 00:09:19,317
[phone beeps]
210
00:09:19,318 --> 00:09:21,326
[clicking]
211
00:09:22,160 --> 00:09:23,977
No connection.
212
00:09:23,983 --> 00:09:25,482
And it's almost night.
213
00:09:25,487 --> 00:09:28,488
[sobs]
I feel so much regret.
214
00:09:28,497 --> 00:09:32,349
I never got the chance
to tell my son I loved him.
215
00:09:32,433 --> 00:09:35,268
Never? You're 87 years old.
216
00:09:35,351 --> 00:09:37,685
Uh, it was on my "to do" list.
217
00:09:37,692 --> 00:09:38,742
Take a look.
218
00:09:38,787 --> 00:09:39,837
See?
219
00:09:44,212 --> 00:09:47,063
Still no sign
of the missing bowlers.
220
00:09:47,146 --> 00:09:48,571
And one thing I must say now,
221
00:09:48,651 --> 00:09:50,881
there is nothing
a newscaster loves better
222
00:09:50,900 --> 00:09:52,249
than missing people,
223
00:09:52,254 --> 00:09:54,184
be they on a mountain,
in a submarine,
224
00:09:54,261 --> 00:09:56,502
or, preferably,
deep under rubble.
225
00:09:56,526 --> 00:09:58,100
Even if we know they're dead,
226
00:09:58,181 --> 00:10:00,181
we'll keep it quiet
for a few days,
227
00:10:00,262 --> 00:10:01,929
just to keep the ratings up.
228
00:10:01,935 --> 00:10:05,194
And now, tonight's lotto,
which no one ever wins.
229
00:10:05,278 --> 00:10:06,845
[chuckling]
230
00:10:07,786 --> 00:10:08,876
No...!
231
00:10:08,957 --> 00:10:11,807
[voice fading]
Why am I talking like this?
232
00:10:11,890 --> 00:10:15,317
I'm not falling,
just clinging to the edge!
233
00:10:16,312 --> 00:10:19,923
Oh, man, that was close.
How deep is that thing, anyway?
234
00:10:20,007 --> 00:10:22,934
Only one way to find out.
235
00:10:23,870 --> 00:10:27,546
[ball clatters
through bowling pins]
236
00:10:27,547 --> 00:10:30,849
Gentlemen, I fear
we're starting to hallucinate.
237
00:10:30,858 --> 00:10:32,299
That's crazy talk.
238
00:10:32,380 --> 00:10:34,472
Barney, pick up the spare.
239
00:10:37,136 --> 00:10:38,319
[pin clunks]
240
00:10:39,829 --> 00:10:42,979
Listen to me. Time to get your
cuckoos back in your clocks.
241
00:10:43,063 --> 00:10:45,396
We're approaching
the point of no return.
242
00:10:45,403 --> 00:10:47,787
Flanders, h-how do I put this?
243
00:10:47,870 --> 00:10:49,503
I was thinking
I might want to...
244
00:10:49,583 --> 00:10:51,692
oh, this is so embarrassing...
245
00:10:51,693 --> 00:10:52,850
pray.
246
00:10:52,851 --> 00:10:56,520
There are no atheists
in foxholes.
247
00:10:56,605 --> 00:10:58,605
Oh, yes.
Foxes are very religious.
248
00:10:58,606 --> 00:11:01,286
I'd be praying if a bunch
of guys in red vests on horses
249
00:11:01,287 --> 00:11:02,636
were trying to kill me.
250
00:11:02,715 --> 00:11:04,791
Now, make with the Our Father.
251
00:11:04,798 --> 00:11:06,907
?
252
00:11:06,908 --> 00:11:09,645
[bowling announcer]
Still no word on the Springfield team.
253
00:11:09,646 --> 00:11:13,673
Please observe an anticipatory
60-second moment of silence.
254
00:11:15,497 --> 00:11:16,939
[ball rolling]
255
00:11:17,019 --> 00:11:18,444
[bowler]
Wasn't me.
256
00:11:19,936 --> 00:11:21,036
Strike.
257
00:11:22,704 --> 00:11:25,797
My friends, if we just
have faith in the good Lord
258
00:11:25,798 --> 00:11:28,052
who blew us to bits
on the side of the mountain,
259
00:11:28,053 --> 00:11:29,145
we'll be okay.
260
00:11:29,224 --> 00:11:32,300
Hey, Churchy Joe,
tell that to my piggies!
261
00:11:32,301 --> 00:11:34,071
The word "frostbite"
sounds so cutesy
262
00:11:34,072 --> 00:11:36,556
when people get it
at Buffalo Bills games,
263
00:11:36,563 --> 00:11:38,821
but when it happens to you, ugh!
264
00:11:38,904 --> 00:11:42,406
Well, I think things
will be just fine.
265
00:11:42,416 --> 00:11:45,266
Really? And who made you
Optimist Prime?
266
00:11:45,349 --> 00:11:48,609
I broke open my first aid kit.
267
00:11:48,693 --> 00:11:51,527
-[gasping]
-Anybody else holding out on anything?
268
00:11:51,528 --> 00:11:53,282
Like me with these
two bags of peanuts,
269
00:11:53,283 --> 00:11:57,268
which I'm going to eat right
now despite my peanut allergy.
270
00:11:58,725 --> 00:12:00,242
[muffled grunt]
271
00:12:01,900 --> 00:12:04,752
See this? This is the face
of a survivor.
272
00:12:04,910 --> 00:12:06,335
[chuckles]
273
00:12:06,415 --> 00:12:09,008
Uh, Christmas decorations?
274
00:12:09,090 --> 00:12:11,090
Uh, in October?
275
00:12:11,172 --> 00:12:13,948
We've done everything we can
to help your father, so...
276
00:12:14,031 --> 00:12:16,681
I thought this would
help us feel better.
277
00:12:16,689 --> 00:12:19,373
[sobbing]
278
00:12:19,532 --> 00:12:22,290
Bart, they say a kid
is only as happy
279
00:12:22,374 --> 00:12:24,298
as their saddest parent.
280
00:12:24,380 --> 00:12:26,613
?
281
00:12:29,988 --> 00:12:32,155
Zoom in on
the heartbroken family.
282
00:12:32,180 --> 00:12:33,512
Zoom, I say!
283
00:12:33,517 --> 00:12:35,017
No. I can't.
284
00:12:35,097 --> 00:12:37,430
I didn't go to journalism
school to be a ghoul.
285
00:12:37,512 --> 00:12:39,529
I went because
it was an easy major.
286
00:12:39,611 --> 00:12:43,430
Take your soul and get the hell
out of local news.
287
00:12:43,440 --> 00:12:44,606
[wind howling]
288
00:12:44,610 --> 00:12:47,009
Fausto... not good.
289
00:12:47,016 --> 00:12:49,117
My friend, we will get you back
290
00:12:49,124 --> 00:12:52,383
and then you and I will have
a grand old time.
291
00:12:52,468 --> 00:12:54,225
I hear you silently agreeing.
292
00:12:54,307 --> 00:12:57,017
-[groans weakly]
-We'll go fishing and make s'mores
293
00:12:57,073 --> 00:12:58,982
and we'll be best friends.
294
00:12:58,983 --> 00:13:00,675
You're a Catholic
and I'm a Christian,
295
00:13:00,676 --> 00:13:02,342
but we'll work through that.
296
00:13:02,423 --> 00:13:04,607
Ooh, more silent agreement.
297
00:13:04,608 --> 00:13:06,267
Here, my friend, let me...
let me set you down
298
00:13:06,268 --> 00:13:08,327
so we can talk about
our great future.
299
00:13:09,537 --> 00:13:12,205
Save your breath, pal.
He's dead.
300
00:13:12,363 --> 00:13:15,047
No! No, he's not dead.
H-He's just resting.
301
00:13:15,129 --> 00:13:17,372
Oh, Lord,
you can't be this cruel.
302
00:13:17,379 --> 00:13:20,547
Sorry, man. I knew
he was a goner a while ago,
303
00:13:20,556 --> 00:13:22,739
but I liked
watching you carry him.
304
00:13:22,821 --> 00:13:24,396
We were gonna make s'mores.
305
00:13:24,401 --> 00:13:27,085
Now there'll just be s'nothing.
[sniffles]
306
00:13:27,167 --> 00:13:29,668
Poor Fausto. Poor Flanders.
307
00:13:29,751 --> 00:13:31,508
You really tried, man.
308
00:13:31,590 --> 00:13:33,089
Oh, I mean it.
309
00:13:33,090 --> 00:13:35,024
I'm not just hugging you
because you're warm,
310
00:13:35,025 --> 00:13:36,783
although that's
a big part of it.
311
00:13:36,864 --> 00:13:38,047
You're a good man.
312
00:13:38,127 --> 00:13:40,052
Homer, I knew you had a heart.
313
00:13:40,133 --> 00:13:42,374
Just like the Cowardly Lion.
314
00:13:42,457 --> 00:13:45,900
He always had a heart.
What he lacked was courage.
315
00:13:45,985 --> 00:13:48,560
And the Scarecrow
lacked straw, right?
316
00:13:48,643 --> 00:13:50,142
No, he was nothing but straw.
317
00:13:50,148 --> 00:13:53,741
Wow. I'm looking at everything
with new eyes.
318
00:13:53,750 --> 00:13:55,659
Just like the Tin Man.
319
00:13:55,665 --> 00:13:57,681
That's not what the Tin Man...
320
00:13:57,763 --> 00:13:59,263
Look, just give me another hug.
321
00:14:00,196 --> 00:14:03,605
All right, gentlemen, there's
a subject we need to discuss.
322
00:14:03,691 --> 00:14:06,783
Now we've waited long enough,
I'm just going to say it:
323
00:14:06,867 --> 00:14:09,309
It is time that we resorted
to cannibalism.
324
00:14:09,392 --> 00:14:10,483
Mmm.
325
00:14:10,561 --> 00:14:12,728
What? No. Absolutely not.
326
00:14:12,886 --> 00:14:14,402
I'm not saying we eat him.
327
00:14:14,481 --> 00:14:17,032
I'm saying we prepare him
to be eaten.
328
00:14:17,033 --> 00:14:19,682
If he gets frozen, we'll just
end up with junk food,
329
00:14:19,683 --> 00:14:21,574
like his hair or his toenails.
330
00:14:21,575 --> 00:14:22,582
What?
331
00:14:22,583 --> 00:14:23,857
Stop! Stop! Stop!
332
00:14:24,698 --> 00:14:26,272
Bawk! Bawk! Bawk!
333
00:14:26,352 --> 00:14:28,870
Just gimme a wing. Come on.
You got two, come on!
334
00:14:28,952 --> 00:14:31,128
No eating people.
335
00:14:33,541 --> 00:14:35,350
?
336
00:14:37,237 --> 00:14:39,887
[Flanders]
If I eat these, and don't share them...
337
00:14:39,971 --> 00:14:41,653
it breaks every value I have.
338
00:14:41,733 --> 00:14:45,310
But just thinking about it
also means I've sinned. Hmm.
339
00:14:45,311 --> 00:14:47,325
I must say, it's a lot easier
to have this debate
340
00:14:47,326 --> 00:14:49,101
with my mouth full of matzah.
341
00:14:49,182 --> 00:14:50,940
-Flanders?
-[gulps]
342
00:14:51,021 --> 00:14:53,263
-Yes?
-It's so clear to me now.
343
00:14:53,345 --> 00:14:54,953
You're the better man, Ned.
344
00:14:55,034 --> 00:14:56,200
Well, that's not true.
345
00:14:56,201 --> 00:14:58,117
You've got the highest average
on the team.
346
00:14:58,118 --> 00:14:59,498
I'm nothing compared to you.
347
00:14:59,499 --> 00:15:01,963
Have you noticed I haven't
called you "stupid Flanders"
348
00:15:01,964 --> 00:15:03,297
once on this mountain?
349
00:15:03,377 --> 00:15:05,802
What do you want,
a Nobel Peace Prize?
350
00:15:05,885 --> 00:15:08,810
Sorry, sorry,
I really do appreciate it.
351
00:15:08,811 --> 00:15:10,230
It's just that
I've come to realize
352
00:15:10,231 --> 00:15:12,398
I'm not a natural leader,
like you.
353
00:15:12,405 --> 00:15:15,181
The Lord has a time and a place
for everyone, my friend.
354
00:15:15,264 --> 00:15:16,914
Homer, if the high altitude
355
00:15:16,915 --> 00:15:18,514
hasn't turned
your brain to mulch,
356
00:15:18,515 --> 00:15:20,349
would you like
to lead us in prayer?
357
00:15:20,430 --> 00:15:23,206
Heavenly father,
who art in truck stop.
358
00:15:23,289 --> 00:15:26,382
Ping-pong. Rock.
Zipper. Jambalaya.
359
00:15:26,466 --> 00:15:27,798
[moans]
360
00:15:27,878 --> 00:15:29,787
-[coughing]
-Now, don't worry.
361
00:15:29,788 --> 00:15:32,133
Just 'cause one of us
has a tickle in his whistle
362
00:15:32,134 --> 00:15:33,909
doesn't mean... [coughs]
363
00:15:33,989 --> 00:15:36,165
[coughing, wheezing]
364
00:15:38,093 --> 00:15:41,336
We're in the tenth frame,
people.
365
00:15:41,421 --> 00:15:44,588
If you want me to eat youse
later, just say nothing.
366
00:15:44,672 --> 00:15:46,614
[moans weakly]
367
00:15:46,770 --> 00:15:48,704
?
368
00:15:56,652 --> 00:15:58,543
-?
-[snoring]
369
00:15:58,549 --> 00:16:00,307
Chief, any news?
370
00:16:00,388 --> 00:16:02,055
About what? Oh, right.
371
00:16:02,060 --> 00:16:04,151
Um, Marge, with conditions
372
00:16:04,175 --> 00:16:06,492
as bad as they are
on that mountain,
373
00:16:06,574 --> 00:16:10,259
even if they somehow
did survive the crash, uh,
374
00:16:10,344 --> 00:16:12,436
oh, how can I put this gently?
375
00:16:12,518 --> 00:16:14,184
What do you mean, "gently"?
376
00:16:14,185 --> 00:16:16,119
You basically told me
they're dead!
377
00:16:16,120 --> 00:16:18,713
Will you please
leave my family be?
378
00:16:18,796 --> 00:16:21,296
[sighs] Never easy being a cop.
379
00:16:21,303 --> 00:16:22,786
Then why did you become one?
380
00:16:22,792 --> 00:16:25,643
'Cause I look great in blue.
It goes with my eyes.
381
00:16:25,725 --> 00:16:27,150
Your eyes are black.
382
00:16:27,230 --> 00:16:29,155
Well, I've wasted my life.
383
00:16:29,236 --> 00:16:30,902
[grunting]
384
00:16:30,984 --> 00:16:32,500
Patty and Selma?
385
00:16:32,580 --> 00:16:34,931
Oh, this day
couldn't get any worse.
386
00:16:35,013 --> 00:16:37,255
Is what my dad would say
if he were alive.
387
00:16:37,338 --> 00:16:39,838
Marge, dear,
at a time like this,
388
00:16:39,845 --> 00:16:42,621
all we want to do
is sit and hold your hand.
389
00:16:42,704 --> 00:16:45,088
No talk. Just love.
390
00:16:46,198 --> 00:16:48,456
I did want to say one thing:
391
00:16:48,457 --> 00:16:50,561
"Better get your booty shorts
to the cleaners
392
00:16:50,562 --> 00:16:53,032
"because you're gonna be
the most popular widow
393
00:16:53,053 --> 00:16:54,886
on the pickleball circuit."
394
00:16:54,892 --> 00:16:56,333
He's not dead!
395
00:16:56,413 --> 00:16:58,246
Well, we can't be sure...
396
00:16:58,327 --> 00:17:00,661
But we did use generative AI
397
00:17:00,743 --> 00:17:03,168
to make an image of Homer
as a corpse.
398
00:17:03,252 --> 00:17:05,360
To get you used
to the idea, dear.
399
00:17:08,936 --> 00:17:11,212
Some of these we had
even before the crash.
400
00:17:11,293 --> 00:17:13,444
He's not dead. He's not dead!
401
00:17:13,450 --> 00:17:16,392
In fact, I bet he's
even going to save the day.
402
00:17:16,476 --> 00:17:19,461
-[suppressed laughter]
-Can you excuse us?
403
00:17:19,485 --> 00:17:21,911
We need to go outside and laugh.
404
00:17:21,994 --> 00:17:24,603
[wind howling]
405
00:17:24,684 --> 00:17:26,167
[Homer]
Oh, is this it?
406
00:17:26,248 --> 00:17:27,990
My story ends now?
407
00:17:27,995 --> 00:17:32,731
Buried in the snow, frozen alone
like broccoli in my freezer?
408
00:17:34,700 --> 00:17:38,519
My dear son,
are you ready to join me?
409
00:17:38,529 --> 00:17:41,471
I am, Mommy.
Take me to the good place.
410
00:17:41,554 --> 00:17:45,631
Um... That's not exactly
where I am.
411
00:17:45,717 --> 00:17:48,552
They are very hard
on former left-wing radicals
412
00:17:48,560 --> 00:17:49,742
in the afterlife.
413
00:17:49,822 --> 00:17:51,080
What are you saying?
414
00:17:51,159 --> 00:17:54,403
I'm in a place with
a lot of incredible people.
415
00:17:54,412 --> 00:17:57,688
Machiavelli, Che Guevara,
416
00:17:57,847 --> 00:17:59,847
Casanova.
417
00:17:59,928 --> 00:18:02,854
Casanova. Oh, Casanova.
418
00:18:02,938 --> 00:18:07,958
I thought dying in 1798 would
keep me from being MeToo'd.
419
00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:09,813
Um... Um...
420
00:18:12,484 --> 00:18:15,411
Mom? What are you making?
421
00:18:15,494 --> 00:18:18,570
All of your father's favorites.
For when he comes back.
422
00:18:18,654 --> 00:18:20,745
Pork chops, glazed ham,
423
00:18:20,827 --> 00:18:24,271
fried hooves, snout surprise.
424
00:18:24,354 --> 00:18:27,022
Oh, I can't be in the same room
with that smell.
425
00:18:27,180 --> 00:18:29,864
Yeah, it's pretty disgusting.
426
00:18:29,947 --> 00:18:32,089
?
427
00:18:33,440 --> 00:18:36,542
[Homer]
Hey, someone's cooking.
428
00:18:36,543 --> 00:18:38,359
Marge is cooking!
429
00:18:39,235 --> 00:18:41,160
I can't die here.
430
00:18:41,241 --> 00:18:42,724
My family needs me.
431
00:18:42,730 --> 00:18:44,396
My story is still being written.
432
00:18:44,401 --> 00:18:48,327
And the next word
in it is yeeargh!
433
00:18:48,414 --> 00:18:49,897
[grunts]
434
00:18:51,423 --> 00:18:53,940
You're coming too, friends.
435
00:18:54,023 --> 00:18:55,706
?
436
00:19:04,313 --> 00:19:07,130
Hidilly doodily, Saviorino!
437
00:19:07,138 --> 00:19:11,624
For once, Flanders, you owe me.
438
00:19:15,348 --> 00:19:18,349
[organ music playing]
439
00:19:18,357 --> 00:19:21,691
Homer Simpson.
Hmm, what can I say?
440
00:19:21,776 --> 00:19:25,295
He slept through Mass.
He'd floss with a Bible ribbon.
441
00:19:25,453 --> 00:19:29,288
I'm afraid he leaves behind
no good deed to remember him by.
442
00:19:29,317 --> 00:19:34,136
Just another fat pinball
slipping past God's flippers.
443
00:19:34,223 --> 00:19:37,224
Here's something
the church never heard of:
444
00:19:37,233 --> 00:19:39,917
A guy coming back from the dead!
445
00:19:39,999 --> 00:19:42,517
-[all gasp]
-God bless him.
446
00:19:42,599 --> 00:19:45,359
My bald, beautiful boy.
447
00:19:45,442 --> 00:19:47,016
No good deeds, Reverend?
448
00:19:47,038 --> 00:19:49,430
I've got a new end
for your eulogy:
449
00:19:49,438 --> 00:19:51,788
Thank God for Homer Simpson!
450
00:19:51,870 --> 00:19:55,222
That's my dad.
Suck it, other dads.
451
00:19:56,718 --> 00:19:59,294
You miss two birthdays
and a school play
452
00:19:59,302 --> 00:20:01,995
and suddenly you're the bad guy.
453
00:20:04,743 --> 00:20:06,594
I knew you'd make it back.
454
00:20:06,749 --> 00:20:10,251
I knew it. I knew it.
455
00:20:10,336 --> 00:20:13,595
You were wrong.
You were wrong!
456
00:20:13,680 --> 00:20:15,955
And you were wrong,
preacher man.
457
00:20:16,037 --> 00:20:17,796
Just premature.
458
00:20:17,876 --> 00:20:21,786
I knew he'd make it.
Since five seconds ago.
459
00:20:21,873 --> 00:20:23,630
? For he's a jolly good fellow ?
460
00:20:23,711 --> 00:20:25,802
? He's now a jolly good fellow ?
461
00:20:25,885 --> 00:20:28,476
? For he's a jolly good fellow ?
462
00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:30,410
? He totally didn't die ?
463
00:20:30,490 --> 00:20:32,749
? He totally didn't die. ?
464
00:20:32,831 --> 00:20:35,999
Simpson, I always knew
you had it in you.
465
00:20:36,084 --> 00:20:39,026
That'll do, Flanders.
That'll do.
466
00:20:39,109 --> 00:20:40,516
Aww.
467
00:20:53,061 --> 00:20:55,153
I'm alive! I'm alive! I'm alive!
468
00:20:55,235 --> 00:20:57,644
Well, you don't have
to make a meal out of it.
469
00:20:57,651 --> 00:20:59,075
Yi-yo-yu!
470
00:20:59,156 --> 00:21:01,414
? For he's a jolly good fellow ?
471
00:21:01,415 --> 00:21:02,924
? He's now a jolly good fellow ?
472
00:21:02,925 --> 00:21:05,851
? For he's a jolly good fellow ?
473
00:21:05,934 --> 00:21:08,619
? He totally didn't die. ?
474
00:21:08,702 --> 00:21:10,877
?
475
00:21:31,607 --> 00:21:33,282
Shh.
476
00:21:34,351 --> 00:21:36,201
[bowling balls clatter]
477
00:21:36,251 --> 00:21:40,801
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
33578
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof