All language subtitles for CHiPs.S04E06.WEBRip.x264-ION10

Oh!

Come on.

You watch the road.

What was that?

Look, he was racing
out of his class.

You belong in midgets!

There's a history of
Dane's behavioral problems.

'In the past year, he's tried'

'to sail to Catalina on a raft.'

'The coastguard found him
after a two-day search.'

Oh, just beach traffic, mom.

On hot days like this,
the highway's always jammed.

I wonder if
the judge had any idea

of the traffic situation when he

approved this custody plan.

Mom.

It's a valid point, honey.

It's dangerous driving you

back and forth
with this traffic.

'The beach isn't
a safe place for you.'

Riptides, body builders.

'It's CHP charity time again.'

'Keep in mind what
we're looking for here.'

It's got to be timely

something that
everyone would enjoy

and would pay to see.

How about
a bike

Uh, now, that's a good idea.

Ponch, remember last year?
Celebrities, stars, ulcers?

Stars!

With some celebrity officials
and star contestants

we can't miss!

It's the CHP
Charity 5K Star Race!

Rocks on the coast highway?

That's an everyday
occurrence, Grossie!

- All we got is an address.

You want to check it out?

Yeah, why not?

Rocks from up there.

'Gone now, and you
know where they went?'

Phwee! Right past here.

We'll check it out, sir.

Do that, will you?
Thank you very much.

- Oh, uh, Mr. Berle.

There's this charity
event I'm working on.

And you want me to appear on it.

- You got me, kid. I'm yours.

Hey! Watch out!

Hey! Hey!

LA 15, 7 Mary 3

'All units in Malibu..'

'We got a landslide'

'at the Pacific Coast Highway
and Sunset.'

'Request paramedics.'

'LA 15 Mary 3..'

You okay?

Get away from
the landslide. Get back.

Head down, head
down the highway.

Let's go. Come on, folks.
Down the highway! Move!

Hurry up! Get back!
Get back off the highway.

- Get back! Come on!

- Get off the highway.
- Take it down the highway.

Alright, here we go.

Alright, we got him.

You alright?

- Hey, somebody--
- Get back!

Somebody take him over there.

You know who this
house belongs to?

- A television producer.

One of the biggest
in Hollywood.

I've seen his name on
the credits. He's good.

Not great, but good.

Kelly, look at this. Ha ha ha.

This note's to
his housekeeper.

The guy's in Europe
shooting a picture.

If we play it
right, we could

stay here until
the road's clear.

We're closing
the highway to vehicles

along the slide area.

Malibu CHP is
covering the North end.

We'll cover this end.

We'll work out a schedule

to cover crowd control
and, uh, security.

'Some of the residents
will be leaving the area'

'until the slide is cleared up.'

How long will it take?

Clearance? A few days.

Not sure about that boulder.

Now, we'll put you
in soft uniforms

walking shoes,
and light-duty gear.

Like beach control?

Yeah, and ten-speeds too.

Ten As in bicycles?

The roads will be jammed with
clearance crews and equipment.

It's either that or a foot beat.

You can hack that,
can't you, hmm?

I can hack it.

Highway of the stars.

My celebrity
connection closed.

Sold all
those tickets.

We got posters
all over town.

Hey, look,
see, people are either

gonna walk into
the beach or bike in.

How are the legs holding up?

Yeah.

We have some security problems.

One of the evacuated
homes was hit last night.

'They took sterling silver,
and a lot of it.'

'And we're allowing,
uh, pedestrian traffic'

'through the closed area.'

Some of the residents
are forming carpools

parking at one end,
walking through to the other.

You get a report
on that sidecar team?

Mm-mm. They just seem
to have disappeared.

How about the boulder?

They tried to loosen it with

pressurized water this morning.

'Now they're going to use
a helicopter and a cable.'

'The engineer will tell
you when it's all clear.'

Now, I'm going to
be at the other end

coordinating with Malibu CHP.

Oh, uh, Frank..

...does this affect
the charity race at all?

No.

Good.

Hey, looking good, sarge.

Sterling silver
and a lot of it.

Kelly!

Oh, why not join us?

Listen to me.

This isn't a halfway
house for beach bunnies.

The idea
is to lay low.

That would
look suspicious.

Tub parties
are de rigueur.

Oh, uh, the burglar-alarm people

were here while
you were asleep.

I told them we were
producers leasing the house.

They believed me.

Sure, the problem
is that you're

starting to believe it!

- You're shouting.
- I'm not shouting!

You just picked a bad time
for an identity crisis!

Your space is
really cluttered.

Slip on a suit.
Join us in the tub.

- Alright, here's our--
- My bureau, top drawer!

It's about time.

Uh.

Hey, Jon, things
are looking up.

I think that's
Linda Ronstadt.

Psst.

Hi. I'm working on this..

Wasn't that Robert Redford?

Okay, uh, that helicopter's
about ready to go.

Better hold the traffic.

Oh, oh, alright.

You really think that helicopter

can move that boulder?

The geologists have a saying

"Time will tell."

Okay, ladies
and gentlemen, I'm sorry.

There's going to
be a short delay

before we let any
traffic go through here.

Just a safety precaution,
so hang in there, alright?

What's wrong?

Well, a safety precaution

while the crew works
on that boulder.

I'm picking
up my daughter.

She's coming in
the other direction.

Oh, it's safe, uh..

They won't start working

until the highway's clear.

Wonderful. Just terrific.

Listen, uh, this is bad timing

but I'm a big fan of yours.

Yeah. The feeling's mutual.

I'm sorry. You guys
have a tough job.

If there's anything
I can do to help..

Well, actually, there's
this charity that--

Ha ha ha!

Alright.

If I'm free, you
can count me in.

- No. Football knee.

Ah, here's the chopper now.

Okay, guys, come on in.

'Dave, we're over you now.'

'We're going to come on in.'

'Okay, great, Art!
I see you coming in.'

'Yeah, it looks like
you're right on line.'

'How do we look?'

You're right on line.

Alright, swing around. Yeah.

You're lined up
with it beautifully.

'How are we lined up, Dave?'

'Come on, Art, you got..'

What's wrong with
your radio up there?

'Uh, something's wrong
with our radio up here, Dave.'

'Speak up.'

Okay, get that net down there.

'We're going to get
the net down now.'

Oh.

- Hi.
- Hi.

You know, you're
my favorite singer.

Am I? Well, you're adorable.

Um...I'm doing a charity.
I'm with the CHP.

- We're doing a charity event.
- 'Yes, I know.'

Why don't you check
with my manager?

And if I'm not
booked, I'll do it.

Ah, that would be great.

Can I have the number, please?

8-3..

You ride a bike?

Well, I tried it once

'when I was ten.'

I still have
the scar but, uh

it only shows on
special occasions.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Yeah, looking good.
Looking good!

Okay, get around.

Get around there.
Okay, get around the back!

Looking good.
Looking good! Yeah!

See you guys later.

You live around here?

Here..

...and Beverly Hills.

Depending.

Parental conflict.

Major cause of
juvenile delinquency.

Because of parental delinquency.

- I'm Dane.
- Cheryl.

Okay, hoist it up!

'Pull her on up! Let's go!'

'Looking good.
Looking good! Yeah!'

'

'Dave, how does it look?'

'Come on!
How do you feel?'

'How's the tension?'

Hey, Dave--

Alright, Art, do you
have maximum lift up there?

'Dave, uh, we're
on maximum power.'

'Everything's
red-lined up here.'

'The boulder's not moving.'

Won't budge, huh?

'Say it again?'

- 'I don't know.'

'But that thing won't budge.'

Okay, guys, unhook it.
Unhook it.

Listen...we'll get
that baby out of there.

We got another plan.

'I hope you have another plan'

'to get that baby out of there.'

Okay, ladies and gentlemen,
looks like a washout

so we're going to let
everyone pass through.

Just take it easy.
It's safe now.

'Just pass on through, okay?'

- Thanks.
- You bet.

Go ahead. Keep them moving.

- Daddy!
- Mmm, muah!

- Oh, sure, I remember you.
- Ha ha ha.

My lawyer's working
on an appeal, Steve.

This won't be going
on for very long.

Yeah.

Mylawyer told me.

Just have Cheryl at
the other end tomorrow, huh?

- And don't be late.
Me late?

You've gone through
life an hour late.

Make that an hour and a half.

See you tomorrow, honey.

Okay. Bye.

- Good talking to you.
- Take care.

Alright, see you later.

- Her name's Cheryl.

She's got, you know,
kind of a problem.

Isn't the seat a little high?

It's adjustable.

You're doing the snacks
for the race?

A depressing tray
of white-bread sandwiches

and, uh, a dip
with box of crackers.

Why don't you go for it, Grossie

and figure on serving indoors?

Indoors

No, that's final.

I'll take you back.

Uh, listen, take us
to the Malibu Sports Arena.

Wherever. Hey, anything
on that burglary?

Not a thing, Bear.

'What makes you think you can'

get the Malibu Sports Club?

You got to believe!

Turn that thing down.

Hmm? Oh.

You're going out?

Why do you think I'm

dressed like this?

Now, that-that's very good.

I go out every night

trying to build a future for us.

Uh, excuse me.

What are you doing?

I think I can doctor this pilot.

It didn't sell
because of the theme.

Unsympathetic to
Native Americans.

Unsympathetic to Native Amer--

Theme? You want to talk
to me about themes?

American Indians?

Didn't sell,
the theme didn't sell?

What's wrong with you?

Theme?

Theme Theme?

Un

What do you know
about television?

You're believing your own act.
You're not a producer!

You're an ex-cycle
racer like me

looking for a break!

Here's what we gotta do.

I got the sidecar
loaded with silver.

We're going to melt
it down and sell it.

No numbers like the gold. Smart?

The road's almost clear.

I hit another house tonight

and then we get out,
okay, Kelly?

Ansgar.

The white socks.

They're wrong with the outfit.

I'm sorry.

Ah, that's great.

And plan on staying
for the wrap party.

Okay, bye.

Hey.

Huh.

Hi, Leif?
Frank Poncherello.

Listen, I got you down
as captain of the A team.

How does that grab you?

Terrific. Don't forget
about the wrap party, okay?

Bye.

It's beautiful.

Hey, you got a body count?

We're a sellout.

Hey, great.

You can figure on a couple

of hundred people.

Flag football,
the water dump, pushball.

Gonna be a busy
afternoon, partner.

Oh, listen. I need some girls
who can punt, pass, and block.

Any ideas?

How many girls?

I need six..

...to fill out
the flag football teams.

Well, what about
the bike racers?

Use them.

What bike racers?

I quote,
"The Great 5K Star Race

And The Boulder
Wrap Party."

W-well, the stars
are going to go

with the events
I worked out.

Oh...huh.

In other words, you didn't have
any takers on the bike race.

Uh, you got it.

Not even when
it was outdoors.

False advertising
if I've ever seen it.

Hey, not to fear, partner.

I know it sounds more like
the Pro-Am Star Olympics

'or the Network Star Games'

but they are contests and stars

and believe me, everybody there
is going to run more than 5Ks.

I see.

Hey, we're talking
entertainment, Jon.

It'll play, trust me.

'Ladies and gentlemen'

'welcome to the Annual CHP
Charity Celebrity Party.'

There's lots of food,
lots of drinks

and a lot of great fun here

so enjoy yourself
and have a good time.

'Come on, folks, have some
lunch and meet the stars.'

'George Peppard
having a great time.'

'Earl Holliman,
Joyce Bulifant, Elinor Donahue'

'Rose Marie and Jackie Joseph'

'Marcia Wallace, Lee Meriwether,
all having a great time.'

'Even Boomer's here.'

'Jo Ann Pflug, Chuck Woolery'

'Lee Meriwether, David Groh.'

'There's Gil Gerard
talking to George Peppard'

'and Bonnie Clark.'

'Even the Bear's sampling
some of Artie's food.'

'I don't believe it.'

'Brett Somers is
here for some fun.'

First on the agenda today

will be the celebrity
football game.

'It's just about to begin.'

'Alright, here comes
the players on the field'

'led by Captain Milton Berle.'

'And introducing football
great Merlin Olsen.'

Get along/Come on, Merlin,
I want you to stand over..

'Head cheerleader
Susan Richardson.'

'Sorry, Milton. Merlin's
got the right idea.'

'Locked in mortal battle on
the other side of the arena'

'in the waiters race
is Conrad Bain'

'fighting off
Daniel J. Travanti.'

'Some of the other
celebrities on these teams'

'are Mike Warren, Betsy Palmer,
Todd Bridges, Gary Burghoff'

'Dody Goodman, Rose Marie,
Dick Van Patten'

'and Dean Butler.'

'Cheering them on
are Linda McCullough'

'Sheila DeWindt, Barbra Horan'

'Candi and Randi Brough,
Judy Landers'

'and beautiful lady truckers.'

'Whoa, whoa.'

'Betsy Palmer looking
great out there.'

'Good hand-off by
Mike Warren to Todd Bridges.'

'Alright, let's
give them a hand!'

This time, we got the ball.

Now, Mike, when
you grab the ball

I'll give you a diagram here.

When you grab the ball

you come right down here.

You stay on the left
end, Eddie, okay?

Then you swerve around.
Then you grab the..

Hey, fellows, give him a chance.

Huh? He's the captain.

'Cheering them on
is Wesley Eure.'

'You know, these actors are from
Actors and Others for Animals.'

'We'd sure like to thank them.'

'We're really a success
because of them.'

'Oh, Gary Burghoff,
looking great out there.'

'You know, most of these actors
are perfect for this event'

'because they spent
the earlier part'

'of their careers
waiting on tables.'

'Rose Marie, looking great.'

'Whoa, she almost lost it.'

'Meanwhile, back
at the football game.'

'Look at that!
Whoa, what a mess!'

'What a pileup.
What a pileup, huh, folks?'

You can't even
see who's winning.

Milton, Milton, just,
just the flags, Milton.

'Back at the waiters race,
folks, we're on the last leg.'

Now it's down to the anchormen

'Dick Van Patten
against Dean Butler'

'and it's a close,
close race. Really close.'

'But it looks like
Dean is moving ahead.'

'Boy, Dean is on a roll.
He is flying!'

'Alright, and the winning
team is Dean's team!'

'Alright, there's
Richard Paul looking on.'

'Gary Burghoff,
one happy winner.'

'Don't forget on
the other side of the arena'

'is the sieve race,
now in progress.'

There's going to be a lot
of wet folks in this race.

'Brian Patrick Clarke
handing to Shawn Stevens.'

'Boy, he's really getting wet.
Everybody's getting wet.'

'Brian Kerwin, Jeb Turner,
Bonnie Clark.'

'There's Bonnie.
Good hand-off, Bonnie.'

'You know, the object
of this game is just simply'

'to fill the buckets
at the end full of water'

'but, they-they have
to use sieves to fill them'

'so everybody's getting
wet in this event.'

'Don't forget, there's
plenty of free food, folks'

'so help yourself,
anytime you want.'

'It's buffetstyle.'

'Alright, it looks
like Bonnie's team'

'is winning here. Yep. Yep.'

'Oh, Jeb, come on. How'd
they rope you into this, Jeb?'

'And the winning team'

'is Bonnie Clark's!'

'Alright, let's hear it
for Bonnie's team! Alright!'

'Hey, Jeb, you sore loser..'

You alright?

'Okay, could I have
everybody's attention?'

Step back here away from
the dangerous area, please.

Could we all get back here?
I appreciate it. Thank you.

Ladies, you want to
step down here, please?

Come on..
Right back here.

Watch this car coming.

Okay, bring the car through.

Move right behind the car.
I'd appreciate it.

Get behind the car.

When that thing blows,
will it scatter much debris?

Oh, probably not.

See, it's really
more like a pop.

We set the charges in
the natural fissures, right?

Breaks up and rolls
down in pieces.

Of course, there's
always the outside chance

that there might be
a few flying rocks.

Come on, I want
to get going

while that boulder's
on their mind.

The sidecar's too small.

Where are you going
to put all this stuff?

I'll find a way.

It's not designed
to carry this much weight.

See you later.

Help!

Help!

Hey, Dane, just hang on.
I'll be with you in a minute.

I'm going to pull
you up, alright?

'Give me all the help
you can. Use your legs.'

Come on, boy.

Hang in there.

Attaboy.

Okay. Hang in there.

I guess you're mad.

You know, of all
the stunts you've pulled

that's about the most pointless

'the most childish,
the most destructive..'

I mean, any moron
can take a can of paint

and paint on a wall or a rock.

Look, Dane.

I mean, it's a way
of getting attention..

...when you can't get
it through achievement.

You're right.

I used to feel good
when I did something.

Like the bike race.

But now I feel..

...dumb.

I'll deal with you later.

You sure you've
got everything?

Just relax and try
to look casual. Let's go.

Ponch! The sidecar bandits.
Come on!

I know.

Okay, come on, move it.

I can explain everything.

No handcuffs?

Okay. I'll fake it.

'Pushball game is starting.'

'Susan Richardson'

'you're the cheerleader
for this one.'

'Lee Meriwether, Peter Marshall,
you gonna be in this?'

'Alright!'

'Carolyn Walker's
ready to play.'

'Ruth Buzzi, is your team
ready for the face'

'Nancy Kulp's team is ready.'

'And there's the face-off!'

'Dennis Burkley diving for it.'

'Altovise Davis getting up
on Gil Gerard's shoulders.'

'Madeline Brew
giving her a hand there.'

'This pushball game is
really getting crazy, folks.'

'Neither team seems to be
making any headway at all.'

'Earl Holliman, Dean Butler,
and Ruth Buzzi'

'getting in on the action.'

'Alright, that's a great
move by Bonnie Clark.'

- You look tired.
- Yeah, so do you.

I'm glad you
canceled that bike race.

I'm thinking
all the time, man.

Oh, uh, I pulled Dane
off that boulder today.

He was painting his
girl's name on it.

That's a turnaround
right there.

He's discovered girls.

Yeah. You know, I
really wanted to help him.

Well, you did. Just being
there is important, you know.

Kids work out a lot
of their own problems.

'Good play, good play.'

'Jimmy Van Patten, Mike Warren'

'Todd Bridges up in the air.'

'Richard Thorne
trying to get it.'

'Remember, folks, this
is pushball, not flyball.'

'Keep the ball down
on the court, players.'

'Johnnie Ray getting
in on the action.'

'Altovise Davis still
on Gil Gerard's shoulders.'

'Wesley Eure, Todd Bridges, and
Kenny Mars doing a great job.'

'And Jimmy Van Patten pops it!'

'John Ericson with
a victory salute.'

'Todd Bridges
and Kenny Mars are happy.'

'There's Quinn Cummings
and Edie Marshall.'

'Great game, folks.'

'Robert Mandan
and Earl Holliman are happy.'

'Remember, folks, the orange
game is about to start'

'with the Bear handing
off to Bonnie Clark'

'and Marcia Wallace.'

'Bonnie passing to John Ericson'

'who's having
a little trouble there'

'who in turn passes
to Lynn Borden.'

'Charlene Holt to Dean Butler'

'to Donna Mills.'

'John Ericson to Lynn Borden'

'to Brian Kerwin.'

'Robert Walden in a beautiful
hand-off to Cindy Williams'

'who hands off to Mike Warren.'

'Brian Kerwin passing
off to Laurie Walters.'

'Mike Warren a beautiful
hand-off to Rose Marie.'

'Rose Marie handing off
to Dan Travanti. Beautiful!'

'And Laurie Walters
handing to Tom Hallick.'

'Looks like Dan's having
a little trouble there.'

'Come on, Dan.'

'Hey, that's cheating.'

'Passing to Dody Goodman.'

'And Richard Paul
passing to Elinor Donahue.'

'Barbra Horan with a beautiful
pass-off to Shawn Stevens.'

'Hey, Gil, what are you doing?'

'And Shawn, a beautiful pass'

'to Judy Landers'

'to Johnnie Ray.'

'Johnnie paid
$200 for this game.'

'Sure, come on, Johnnie.'

'Looks like they're an item.'

'I know they're an item.'

'Come on, Johnnie,
play the game.'

'And Johnnie passes
to Ruth Buzzi.'

'Alright...come on then, Ruth.'

'Okay, who in turn
passes to Earl Holliman.'

'It's time to dunk your
favorite CHP officer.'

'Sure glad I'm up here,
folks, and not down there.'

'First officer up
is Artie Grossman.'

'And here to do the honors
is Cindy Williams.'

'Come on, Cindy,
give it to him.'

'He deserves it for that food.'

'That a girl, that a girl!'

'That's what you get
for the food, Artie.'

'Next on the firing
line is Bonnie Clark.'

Oh.

'Officer Bonnie Clark'

'ready to be dunked.'

Cheer him up!

'Robert Walden
taking a shot at her.'

- 'You missed!'
- 'Bonnie's getting cold.'

'Let's bring in someone
from the bullpen.'

'Richard Kline's gonna try it.'

'Oh ho ho! First hit.'

'Good play, Richard.'

- 'Whoo!'
- 'Great, great shot, Richard.'

'You're happy now, Richard.'

'Just hope she never'

'stops you on the freeway'

'because she'll
throw the book at you.'

'Alright, next to get
dunked, officer..'

'Let me have a throw.'

'...Barry Baricza.'

'Judy Landers..'

'...poising, throwing.'

'Aw. Come on, Judy.'

'Next ball.'

'Okay, Judy, look out.'

'I-I-I see, uh, Johnnie Ray'

'coming through the crowd.'

'Next up, Donna Mills.'

'Come on, dunk him.'

'Oh, nice try, Donna.'

'We got to sink this guy.'

'Come on, who's going to..'

'Lee Meriwether,
come on, come on.'

'Alright. Okay.
Todd Bridges is gonna do it.'

'Hey, Todd, you're hitting
it, but you're not..'

'Come on, a little
more power, Todd.'

'Hey, wait!'

'I thought of
doing that myself.'

'Officer Jeb Turner will
be next to be dunked.'

'Michael Warren is
doing the dirty work.'

'Come on, Mike, give it to him.'

'He's gonna let him
hang for a while, huh?'

'Good going, Mike. Good going.'

'Well, I know Jeb's in there,
Mike, I saw him, oh, oh.'

'Jeb. Jeb?'

'Oh, Jeb.'

'Look out, Mike!'

'Hey, Vic Tayback
has joined the party.'

'Alright, folks, I'd
like to remind you'

'we have tons and tons
of wonderful food..'

She's growing up.

We won't have
her much longer.

I know.

There ought to be some way to
enjoy the time we have left.

There is.

Your place or mine?

May I have your
attention, please?

Why don't everyone
step forward

and watch the giant TV screen
and get your final look

at the famous Malibu boulder!

'Wow..'

We're back at the site
of that giant rock.

That boulder has been a source
of frustration, challenge

and even a bit of
embarrassment to the experts.

Their first attempt to lift
it away by helicopter failed

but now the experts
say they feel sure

that explosives
are the answer.

Okay, folks, can I
have quiet, please?

It's still there.

Well, what are
you gonna do now?

Carve a President on it?

Uh, no. Um..

What we'll do is we'll...
build a retaining wall

and we'll just chip away
at it, piece by piece.

Could take months.

Months?

Why me?

Why me?