All language subtitles for the._.lives.of.college.girls.s03e06.1080p.web.h264-successfulcrab_track3_[eng]

♪ There will be blood ♪

♪ Run for your life ♪

♪ Go on and say ♪

♪ Go on and say
your last goodbye... ♪

Good evening, ladies.

(gasps) You look beautiful!

Like a mannequin
in a fancy department store.

I wouldn't put it that way,
but, yeah, you look cute.

Thank you.
I'm doing a practice run

of my hair and makeup
for tomorrow's rehearsal.

I want to look my best
when I say my one line.

- You only have one line?
- KACEY: Mm-hmm.

But, you know,
sometimes, one line

can make or break a show.

I mean, mine doesn't,

but in theory it's possible.

- Mm-hmm.
- What musical are you doing?

It's an original show
that combines

all of the best songs
from other musicals.

A musical of musicals? How fun!

TAYLOR:
Sounds awful.

What? It does.

I'm sorry, why are you here?

Bela gave me a key.

She's having issues
with her roommate.

Shouldn't you be mediating

and trying to solve the problem?

TAYLOR:
She did solve the problem.

By giving me unrestricted access
to your room.

And your snacks
and whatever's in the fridge.

Well...

time for bed.

KACEY:
Oh, that's actually my--

So do we live
with that scary lady now?

Well, she's having a tough time.

It's the least we can do.

Besides, she's not that bad.

Do you mind
if I shut the lights off?

It's just, I'm getting
some bleed beneath the door.

Yeah.

(door shuts)

Okay, I'll fix it.

♪ Be blood ♪

♪ Run for your life ♪

♪ Go on and say, go on
and say your last goodbye ♪

How do I look?

Like you robbed a pilgrim.

Sure, okay,
but also, who am I giving?

Kimberly, it is too early
in the morning for this.

Just tell me
what you want me to say.

RBG.

The collar's nod in honor

of the first day
of my ethics professor's

- symposium.
- Oh.

The professor's never let
a sophomore in before,

so I really want to wow her.

And she's so accomplished.

Look at how many
colleague recommendations

she has.
What I wouldn't give to have

even just one recommendation.

- I'll recommend you.
- Oh, I know you're trying

to be supportive,
but we're not in the same field,

so it would mean nothing.

Do you think it would be weird
to request a connect

with my professor on LinkedIn?

Yes, that would
definitely be weird.

I already did it.

Good talk.

♪ ♪

Okay, everyone,
Halloween is in a few days,

and we need to make sure
the KJ House party

is both dope as hell and
culturally respectful as fuck.

JOCELYN:
Yes, respectful and classy.

- As long as I can have
my titties out.
- Yeah. Mm-hmm.

- What's your costume?
- I'm not sure yet.

I just know I'm gonna have
my titties out.

- Oh.
- Mm.

Sorry I'm late.

Oh.

Hey.

Hey, you.

CANAAN:
It's good to, uh--

WHITNEY:
Yeah, it's, uh-- good.

So do we have a DJ lined up yet?

You thought I wasn't gonna
stop the whole meeting

to address that awkwardness?

WILLOW:
Yeah, that was crazy.

I assumed you and Canaan

were cool by now.

We are. Yeah, it's all good.

I'm dating someone new.

I'm sure Canaan
probably is, too.

Yeah.

I'm seeing someone.

JAYLA:
Someone?

More like some three or four.

Canaan hosts more college girls

than a hostel at Spring Break.

Thank you, Jayla.

(clears throat)

I'm happy we're good.

Yeah, it's fine. I didn't need

some, like, big apology, so...

Should we talk about pumpkins?
Let's talk about pumpkins.

Wait a minute,
he didn't apologize?

Motion to stop the meeting
until Canaan says he's sorry?

- Seconded.
- Thirded.

You really don't have
to do this.

No, they're right.

I do owe you an apology.

I really am sorry

for going behind your back
with Kimberly.

Not only should I have been
honest with you,

but I should've
never crossed a line

with a friend of yours.

Whit, you good?

Yeah.

- Yeah, that was really nice.
- JAYLA: Okay.

Next order of business, who's
gonna help clean up the kitchen?

'Cause it's still a little funky
from the Labor Day potluck.

Ooh, I'm out.

Can't help, very busy.

- I have class today.
- My mama calling,

- so I'm gonna go
take this outside.
- JAYLA: Hey!

The meeting just started.
Where y'all going?

Professor Friedman,

thank you so much
for having me.

- I'm so excited to be here.
- Happy to have you.

I think you're really
gonna fit in.

Well, hopefully, I'll stand out

a little bit as well.

Are you wearing the thing

they sell Asian pears in?

Oh, um...

not exactly.

Welcome, everyone.

As you know,
the students in this room

are my best and brightest.

Let's go around

the room
and introduce ourselves.

Names, facts,

anything you overachievers
want to brag about.

Uh, hey, I'm Brian.

I'm president
of the Essex College Democrats.

And I spent the summer interning

at the ACLU Headquarters
in New York.

STEVE: I'm Steve.
Don't want to jinx it,

but I'm probably going
to Stanford Law next year.

I'm a double legacy, so... yeah.

Sup, I'm Lars,
and I actually just

spent a semester in Shanghai
doing comparative research

on Hong Kong
and China's legal systems, so...

Wow, starting off strong
with three really good intros.

I'm, uh, Kimberly.

I'm from Arizona.

Hmm.

And I also recently worked
for the governor of Arizona.

That's so cool, what'd you do?

Well, my official title
was "liaison,"

so in that capacity, I...

helped with initiatives

that could be liaised

vis-à-vis the government

and vis-à-vis Arizona.

That's crazy, my uncle's, like,

best friends with the governor.

I've got to text him and see

if he knows you.
Kimberly, right?

No! Don't do that. I was joking.

Joking?

Yeah, and it's funny because

I actually never met
the governor.

So you lied.

Uh, you could call it a lie.

But aren't all jokes just lies
when you think about it?

I mean, show me a comedian,

and I'll show you
a professional liar.

- Vis-à-vis--
- For the love of God,

could somebody else
introduce themselves, please?

("Yeah We Do It Like" playing)

- ♪ Yeah we do it like ♪
- ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

DORFMANN:
It's time for everyone's

favorite part of rehearsal:
notes.

Um, sorry if my singing was
a little bit off.

I was startled
by a moth earlier,

so my throat was a little bit
hoarse from all the screams.

- I thought your tone was lovely.
- Wow.

You do not know how much
that means to me.

Like, every single time
you compliment me, I swear

it feels like the sun
is shining brighter on me.

Feels amazing. (exhales)

DORFMANN:
My first note is for Kacey.

Give me your line again.

I'd love to.

Four loaves of bread, please.

Kacey, do you think
this is the first time

your character has ever
ordered bread?

Probably not
because she's so old?

Mm-hmm.
Then why does it sound false?

Let's try it again.

Four loaves of bread, please.

I'm losing "bread."

Four loaves of bread, please?

And now you're just
screaming about bread.

It's okay.

Everyone, let's learn from this.

No matter how simple the line,

you must approach it
with honesty,

detail and work.

Think about what kind
of bread it is.

Ciabatta, a rustic wheat.

Italian herbs and cheeses!

DORFMANN:
That's very interesting, Blair.

Don't worry, Kacey.

I'm sure you'll get it right
by the time we open.

Now, next I want to look at the
footwork at the top of act two.

Hurry to places, please.

Hey, for what it's worth,
I thought you killed it.

Like, the way
you were begging for bread,

it was pathetic,
and I mean that in a good way.

Thank you.

I appreciate that.

Can I take you out sometime?

Like, I think you're cute and
I think we'd have fun together.

- A date?
- Yeah.

Yeah, that sounds fine, I guess.

Cool. Hey, you know, the rest
of the cast is getting together

for a Hamilton rap-a-long.
Do you want to go?

Oh, no.

I'm gonna be busy
whenever that's happening.

Oh, I meant so we could
make fun of them.

If you thought I meant that as
an actual suggestion,

I've got a lot to prove to you.

Oh. (laughs)

- (whistle blows)
- HALE: That's practice!

Hey, Canaan's apology
was nice, right?

It'll be good to have him
as a friend again.

You really think
you're gonna be friends?

What are you gonna do,
go get boba?

Start a text thread
about Vanderpump?

I mean, maybe.

I'd love to hear his takes
on the Bravoverse.

Why are you being weird
about it?

Because everyone knows
you can't be friends with an ex.

There's no way to small talk

with someone when
you've seen their genitals.

I make small talk with you

and I've seen your genitals
a bunch of times.

Locker room sightings
don't count.

My point is,
you can't friend an ex.

That's just facts.

♪ ♪

Hey, um, before we go to our
first Halloween party together,

would you be open to having
a couples costume, and if so,

would you feel
more comfortable as...

hot Donkey or hot Shrek?

Absolutely would have picked
Hot Shrek, but

I signed up for FAF duty
on Halloween.

- What? That stinks! Wait.
- I know.

- Is Halloween pretty intense
for FAFs?
- Yep.

It's the day
college students are

most likely
to die in an accident.

Sorry, I don't know why
I'm saying that like it's fun.

Anyway, do you want to go
back to your room and make out?

Yeah, I wish.
Uh, Taylor's in my room.

- Oh, that's nice.
- Not really.

She never leaves. It's like we
live with a British roast comic.

This morning I tripped on a shoe
and she had a field day.

- Wait, why won't she leave?
- Roommate drama.

Mm, you could help her
find a new hobby.

Keep her busy. What's she into?

Mm, she seems to enjoy seducing

and sexually dominating
beautiful women.

Wait, that's perfect.
I'll get her a new girlfriend,

and then she'll become
their problem instead.

Oh, no, I kind of meant
more like a book club,

you know, or clarinet lessons?

It's a really
underrated woodwind

and it's featured in more
popular music than people think.

God, she'd roast you
for saying that.

- Yeah.
- I think my plan
will work just fine.

And if it doesn't, just know

it was the British girl
that murdered me.

(chuckles)

Huge news, everyone.

You found out who used
all my sage hand cream?

Bela, that was you.
You got drunk

and you dipped
your pizza crust in it.

LILA:
Ladies, please,

let this tiny speck
of a woman share her news.

Thank you.

I have... a date.

(all exclaim, clamor)

I'm so excited!
I love first dates.

The tension of the unknown,

the blush of cheeks
when you lock eyes.

Wait, when was the last time

you actually went
on a first date?

Sixth grade, with Calvin.

We went to the mall
and held hands.

He bought me a pretzel.

KIMBERLY:
A college first date might be

a tiny bit more adult.

Yeah, we're all wondering,

so I'll go ahead and ask,

does this guy know
you're a virgin?

No, it hasn't come up.

Why? It's not bad
to be a virgin, is it?

- Of course it's bad.
- Lila.

Men want to know
that sex is on the table.

And if you have sex
on the table,

make sure to wipe
the loose salt off first.

- That shit burns.
- KIMBERLY: Lila, no.

Being a virgin isn't bad.
I would just be honest about it.

Yeah, Kimberly's right, there's
no shame in being a virgin.

- Disagree.
- KIMBERLY: Ignore her.

But it's not exactly the most
exciting topic for a first date.

I mean, it's not an exciting
topic for any date.

If you want to see
this guy again,

I would take this secret
to your grave.

Well, ladies, while I appreciate

the enthusiastic debate,

I just, I really don't think
it's gonna come up.

- We're just getting ice cream.
- BELA: Okay, but just remember,

if he invites you back to
his room, that's code for sex.

And if he turns on the music,
that's code for butt stuff.

I mean, not always,
but sometimes.

It depends on the music.

It was nice meeting you,
by the way.

KACEY:
You, too.

- (door closes)
- She's adorable.

♪ I like it when
I'm movin' and movin' ♪

♪ I want to go hard ♪

♪ Music is pumpin'... ♪

When you said a "real date,"

this wasn't exactly
what I imagined.

Sorry, I know it's not ideal,

but I have to get
some strength training in today.

- Coach's orders.
- Hey, if this is the only time

you have for me, I'll take it.

And I will need you
to sit on my back

- while I do my push-ups.
- Okay.

Sup, Whit?

Canaan, hey.

Uh, this is Isaiah.

- Hey, man, good to meet you.
- You, too.

Two days in a row.
You stalking me, Chase?

Two days? That's interesting.

Sounds like you see "Chase"
more than I do.

Chase is just here to work out.

- So, we'll let you
get back to it.
- Sure.

Hey, Canaan, you here
for the dancercise class?

No, man, I, uh, actually just
set up for my bench press.

Might check out
the class after, though.

- You should join.
- Nah, that's all you.

You want to go warm up?

(exhaling)

I think I'll get
a quick set in first.

(sighs)

You mind if I work in?

Yeah, go for it.

This a good starting
weight for me.

CANAAN:
He showing off his ass
for me or you?

Seems like he could have just
wiped his face with the towel.

Hmm.

(straining)

Ah...

WHITNEY:
Just so you know,

you have nothing
to be jealous of.

(strains):
I'm not jealous.

(grunts)

♪ ♪

- ♪ Movin' and groovin' ♪
- ♪ I could dance all night ♪

- ♪ Movin' and groovin' ♪
- ♪ Show me how you move ♪

♪ When you're on the floor,
show me how you groove ♪

♪ When you want some more ♪

♪ I could dance all... ♪

Delivery for Lila?

Thank you so much, Marv.

Damn it!

Lila, we clearly
have enough oat milk.

Why do you keep ordering more?

I cannot lie to you, Kimberly.

I am trying to track down
a hot Instacart shopper

that delivered my groceries
one time.

And if I have to order
ten oat milks every day

just to find
the mysterious Instacart snack

known only to me as "Gabe,"
then, by God,

I will use the Sips credit card
to do that.

Fine, but why don't you order
something we actually need?

We ran out of vanilla syrup,
like, a week ago.

Kimberly, you just blew my mind.

Oh, hello.

Love the topknot.

Professor Friedman.
I'm sure you don't remember,

but just in case you do,
I want to apologize

for lying yesterday in class.

I definitely remember.

And talked about it
with some colleagues.

Why did you feel
the need to lie?

Well, I just heard
how impressive all the other

students were and I didn't
want them to think of me

- as the runt of the litter.
- Hmm.

And I'm sure you're gonna say
that's not the case. (chuckles)

No, I-I think they do think
you're the runt.

You're a year younger,
with less experience.

- Okay, so what do I do?
- Look,

you made a decision to pursue
a job that's male-dominated.

As a woman that owns
dozens of blazers, I love that.

But you will likely need to go

above and beyond
to prove yourself

and earn the respect
of your colleagues.

If you let those guys steamroll
you once, they'll never stop.

You're so wise.

Thanks.

Uh, could I order now?

- Yeah.
- As rewarding as it was,

I'd love a coffee.
And to leave.

Delivery for Lila?

Oh, good, more milk
delivered by a random woman.

(laughs):
I love it. Yay.

("Asereje (Airplane Mode)"
by Blanka playing)

BELA:
Come on, Taylor.

We don't want to be late
for the special FAF event.

That's where you're wrong.
They're never special,

and I always want to be late.

Greetings. Are you here

for queer speed dating?

- Surprise.
- Oh, hell no.

Nope. Hell yes.

Welcome to the gathering
of the most available

and eager women on campus.

Oh, so you read the flyer.

You used your position
as a FAF to trick me.

BELA:
Oh, grow up.

I have a feeling
you're about to meet

the person of your damn dreams.

- I doubt it.
- Come on.

I know we just met,

but I feel like
I've known you forever.

Are you also getting
a past life connection?

- I don't know what
that is, but no.
- Really?

You don't know
about your past lives?

I could tell you
what they were if you want.

(laughs softly)

♪ ♪

I identify as a gender-fluid

gynosexual
in a poly relationship

with a skoliosexual,
a pangender demisexual

and a fully straight guy.

And we're looking for a fifth.

What about you?

I'm...

Taylor.

♪ Turn around, turn around... ♪

I should tell you, I have a kid.

Sort of.

It's my sourdough starter,

and I have to burp it
every eight hours.

(laughs softly)

♪ Baby... ♪

I really like your accent.
It's like...

(British accent): "Methinks
we got an out-of-towner.

"Spot of tea, milady? Innit?

Innit? Innit?"

♪ I can sit around,
sit around... ♪

GINGER:
Hey. Friendly reminder.

Please wait to check yes or no
until after each date.

Question:
is there anyone cool here?

And why does literally everybody
have tattoos of the moon?

I was about to ask
that exact same question.

Hello.

Sorry.

I'm Taylor.

- I'm Ash.
- Hmm.

I've been waiting
to pair with you all night.

- Oh, really?
- Mm.

Are you gonna tell me
your sad coming out story?

'Cause I've only heard
ten of those today.

Oh, but mine's so different.

Yeah, my parents
really didn't understand me.

(laughs)

- (both laugh)
- BELA: Well, Ginger,

guess I've done
what I came here to do.

That makes one of us.

GINGER:
I didn't match with anyone.

But it's okay.
I think being lonely

adds a lot of depth
to my sapphic yarn art.

(both laugh)

KACEY:
It's like, what kind
of ice cream place

doesn't have hot fudge?

COOPER:
I still don't understand

how that's better
than a chocolate sauce.

Cooper, I'm sorry, but you sound
really ignorant right now.

(both laugh)

I'm having a really good
time tonight.

I want to know
everything about you.

Oh, my God, same.

Okay, um,
top three favorite movies.

Oh, easy. John Wick,

John Wick 3, John Wick 2.

There are three of those things?

Yeah. There's actually four.

Mm.

Do you want to come over
and watch one?

- Like, in your room?
- Yeah.

My roommates are out tonight,

and we have
a really comfy couch.

Instead of going there,

we could, um, just watch it here
in public on your phone.

Why would we do that?

Well, the benches here
are quite comfortable.

Some might say more comfortable
than indoor furniture.

You sure?

M-My dorm's right over there.

("Acelera" by Zonora Point
playing)

♪ ♪

Hey, I think you're in my seat.

I left my Chagaccino there.

Sorry, I'm sitting here now.

Why don't you take
one of the open seats?

(sighs)
They're all in a sunbeam.

FRIEDMAN:
All right, anyone find

any good voter suppression
case studies?

I found some really good stuff
in this book from the library.

STEVE:
Yeah, I'm sure that old-looking
book is on the cutting edge.

I bought a subscription
to a new legal research site.

It's like LexisNexis
on frickin' crack.

Well, Steve,
some of us need to rely

on free resources, Steve.

Sorry I can't afford
fancy subscriptions,

or more than ten New York Times
articles a month, Steve.

Let me guess,

you have a rich dad
who's bankrolling you.

This is Steve.
Boop, boop, boop, boop.

"Uh, Daddy?
Yeah, I need more money

because there's an academic
database I need access to."

Yeah, no, wait, actually,
you probably don't even talk

to your dad.

Your dad probably hates you

but pays for everything
you want anyway.

Like, did your dad buy
your Chagaccino, Steve?

"Enjoy your Chagaccino, sport."

- (crying)
- (other students murmuring)

(door opens)

LARS:
Dude,

his dad died
in a helicopter accident.

(Steve crying)

Is Steve okay?

He was crying pretty hard.

It was tough making out words,
but I did hear "bullying,"

so I think he'll be making
a formal complaint.

What? I can't be a bully.

I'm a runt, remember?

Well, you went
from runt to cunt.

Whoa. Are you allowed
to say that?

Probably not.
I got caught up in the rhyme.

But my point still stands.
You overdid it.

Okay, how do I un-overdo it?

Kimberly, if you can't find

your way through this
on your own,

maybe you don't belong
in the symposium.

♪ What are you talking about? ♪

♪ What are you
talking about? ♪

♪ I'm never leaving the house ♪

♪ You know, we gotta get out ♪

♪ I want your mind on fire,
fire ♪

♪ I want your mind
on fire, fire ♪

♪ I want your mind on fire,
fire ♪

♪ I want your mind, your mind,
your mind, your mind ♪

♪ I want your mind on fire,
fire... ♪

Okay, first things first,
let's head to the bar

so I can make everyone
a Kacey-tini.

Oh, I don't know what that is,

but I hope it includes
orange soda

because I have eight liters
on the way,

hopefully cradled in the arms
of a hot man named Gabe.

I'm gonna go check on Isaiah.
He was, like,

weirdly jealous of Canaan
yesterday,

so I'm just gonna go
make sure he knows

he has nothing to worry about.

Cool, cool.

Oh, how was
your virgin date, Kacey?

- Oh, it was a disaster.
- Aw.

He invited me back to his room
and I freaked out

and ran away so fast,
I dislodged a few cobblestones.

- Oh?
- I'm sure he thinks
I'm a total weirdo.

Or maybe he just thinks

you're playing hard to get.

I've never done it myself,

but I've heard great things.

LILA:
Great point, Bela.

Problem solved. Let's go dance!

I don't think I'm in the mood.

I'd rather sit down somewhere
and untangle my headphones.

Oh, do you want to swap
your Bernie Sanders costume

for my fairy costume so you
can look cute for a while?

Uh, no, I'm good.

I just can't stop
thinking about earlier.

I haven't seen a guy
cry that hard

since my dad watched Sing 2.

- Is that a sad movie?
- It is.

Bono plays a lion
who misses his dead wife.

- (laughs) Funny.
- MAN: Hello.

I've a whole lot of soda
for Lila?

I got Marv twice?

You can keep the soda, Marv.

Yes.

I'm going again.

♪ ♪

And you know, it's like,
now I have no choice

but to tell him
that I'm a virgin.

Well, you know,
technically speaking,

you might not even be a virgin.

Have you ever gone
on a wooden roller coaster?

WILLOW:
Ignore her. My question is,

why do you go on a date
with a theater major

- in the first place?
- Yeah.

- Let's talk about that.
- WILLOW: Really, though,

if this guy is worth dating,

he won't care
that you're a virgin.

Yeah, you know,
I-I-I think that that's true.

Just make sure you look good
when you tell him.

If you look sickening enough,

you can say anything to a man

and he'll be fine with it.
That's facts.

You suck.

- Thanks.
- See?

Wow.

It's all in the boobs. Stick
your chest up a little bit.

- JOCELYN: Mm-hmm.
- WILLOW and JAYLA: Yeah!

JOCELYN:
You ain't look
like no virgin to me.

♪ ♪

Thank you.

Everyone keeps thinking
I'm dressed

like the old guy from Up.

That's crazy.

If anything,
you look like Larry David.

Why are you dressed
as Danny DeVito?

Oh, no, that's not-- Eh.

- Forget it.
- Hey, girleena.

Wait, where's your new gay bae?

It didn't work out.
I don't really think

I'm in my dating era
at the moment.

I'm not giving up, I am very
motivated to find you someone.

Any constructive criticism?
Feedback?

We could absolutely find you
someone else tonight.

I don't think so.

And I'm not really
feeling this party.

I think I'm gonna head home.

Do we still have that pad thai
in our room fridge?

Our room? You don't live there.

I know you're probably upset
about how your costume looks,

but there's no need
to take it out on me.

BELA:
Taylor, I'm sorry, but

you're driving me
and my roommates nuts.

You're in our suite
way too much.

You're mean.
And I'm pretty sure

you've been trimming
your bangs in my bed.

- Uh, you can't prove that.
- I don't care.

I want my key back.

Fine. Here.

- (sighs)
- ♪ ♪

♪ Awake all night ♪

♪ 'Cause you're,
you're paralyzed... ♪

Should we tell that guy
he's hitting on a fake mummy?

No. No. Let him keep trying.
He needs to learn.

Is there a Lila here
who ordered a, uh,

single banana from 7-Eleven?

Gabe!

There is a Lila. It's me.

I've been waiting for you.

Is this your last delivery
of the night?

It is now.

Holy fuck. Yes!

(chuckles)

Oh, gotta love it.

I'm-a bounce out.

Got a party I got to make it to.

Mm-hmm.

Okay, if you're meeting up
with a girl,

you can just say that.

Okay, yeah.

Yeah, I'm meeting up
with a girl.

- Okay.
- I'm happy we're friends again.

Me, too.

You look really good tonight.

Thank you.

♪ ♪

♪ When I'm grind her,
I'm-a ask ♪

♪ Yeah, huh,
if not, you will, lil momma ♪

♪ I'm-a serve you all night
and you can jerk... ♪

KIMBERLY:
I need to figure out

how to get along
with the guys in this symposium,

but still be taken seriously.

What's a good middle ground
between runt and cunt?

It doesn't have to rhyme,
but it could.

Look, no matter what you do,

you're either a quiet voice
they can push around,

or you dare to talk to them
the way they talk to each other

and get labeled a raging bitch.

KACEY:
She's right.

Those are the two types
of women.

Oh, I don't think that.

I'm just paraphrasing
what society thinks.

The point is, you're not
a runt or a cunt.

You're Kimberly Finkle.

You're a smart,
unique weirdo who knows the name

of every president
and their wife

and their cause of death.

That's true. Most people think

President Garfield died
of a gunshot wound,

but he actually died
80 days later of sepsis.

Exactly. Only you would know
something that boring.

WHITNEY:
And don't let some stupid jerk

make you spend time wondering

how to present yourself.

Just be you.

Okay. Thanks, guys.

Yeah. You got this.

Now let's change
into a cuter costume

and take some selfies.

I'm not changing my costume.

Please.
At least unzip the parka.

Hey. Where-where have you been?

I feel like I haven't
seen you all night.

WHITNEY:
I've been right here.

Just with my roommates.

Hey, uh, do you want to get out
of here and go to your place?

You read my mind.

- Okay.
- Mm-hmm.

- Bye.
- BELA: Ugh.

I hate to see them go,

but I love to watch
Isaiah leave.

Damn, he's got a nice back.

Mm.

(playful hissing)

♪ ♪

Kacey? (knocks)

Can we talk for a sec?

KAYCE:
Cooper, um... Please, no.

We're in the middle
of a makeup test,

so just come back later.

I just think we should talk now.

KACEY:
Okay, fine.

Holy fuck!

I don't want you
to see me like this.

Please, just talk to my shoes.

No, no, you look... good.

I mean, hey, I like seeing
what you'd look like

150 years from now.
That's... (chuckles)

So, what happened?

I thought we were having
a good date and then you bolted.

Okay, Cooper,
I have to tell you something.

I'm a virgin.

All right. That's cool.

I've never had sex.

I know what virgin means.

Oh.
(chuckles softly)

Kacey, I like you,

I'm happy to take things
at your pace.

- Are you sure?
- Yeah.

Honestly, I was just
kind of disappointed

that I didn't get
a good night kiss

at the end of our date.

I wanted that, too.

Would it be all right
if I kissed you now?

I'd like that.

♪ ♪

- Oh, sorry.
- Yeah, it's...

- Just...
- Maybe we could...

Okay, so, who wants
to present first?

I'll go.

So I've been thinking a lot
about my dad, Dale Finkle.

He's a manager of Walgreens,

and they have a policy
to give employees time off

to go vote on election days.

But people are afraid
that they'll lose their jobs

if they take too much time
off work to wait in long lines,

and because of that,

important voices aren't
being heard.

Cute story. Why don't they just

mail in their ballots?
That's how I vote.

Really?
What state do you vote in?

- California.
- Then mail-in voting
makes sense for you.

But not everyone is lucky enough

to live in a state
where that's an option.

So thank you for helping me

illustrate my point,

which is that diversifying

the ways we vote is the only way

working-class Americans
in a majority of states

can make sure they're a part
of the democratic process.

And until they are,

I would suggest you check
your mail privilege.

M-A-I-L.

Damn, Steve, she just
homophoned your ass.

FRIEDMAN:
She really did.

I love the way Kimberly came in,

shared a smart idea

of her family's experience

as opposed to something
she just read online.

That's really
the kind of personal story

I'm looking for.

I'll have to change the names

so I can use it for my own,
but well done.

♪ ♪

(indistinct chatter)

(phone chimes)

Yes! Oh-- Sorry.

I just got a really good
push notification.

- That's absolutely not true.
- (knock at door)

Hey, Taylor, uh,
can we talk for a moment?

Uh, sure. Um...

What's up?

So I came here to apologize

for what I said
at the Halloween party,

but now I'm confused.

I thought you didn't like
your roommate.

That's...

not exactly the issue.

Okay. So, what is it?

Do you think
your room is haunted?

Because it is. They all are.

I have a crush on my roommate,

but she isn't into girls.

I love being around her,

but at the same time,
I know I can't be with her

in the way that I want,
and it's really painful.

I get it.

It sucks to be into someone
who's unavailable.

(sighs)

I'll give you
our room key back, but...

you have to be nice to everyone.

Fine. I'll behave.

♪ ♪

WHITNEY:
(groans) Coach is pushing us
too damn hard.

Why do we have to show up
two hours early to every game?

What's going on with you?
You're dragging ass today.

I didn't sleep at all.

Canaan, like, touched
my lower back last night,

and it really threw me off.

I told you, you can't be
friends with an ex.

Yeah, I felt so guilty about it,
I stayed up with Isaiah.

We stayed up, like, three times.

The guilt bang. I've been there.

I didn't sleep well, either.

Not for sex reasons.

I spilled a bowl of pasta
in my bed.

I'm gonna play real bad today.

♪ I didn't even tell the team,
I just say less ♪

♪ Like a muse by lead,
I do real flex ♪

♪ Main character,
queen's in the main day ♪

♪ Say my name,
ring bells on the realest... ♪

(cheering)

Ow!

(pained groaning)
Fuck!

(whistle blows)

(groaning)
Oh, fuck.

- (players shouting)
- Fuck! Shit.

♪ ♪

You have a slight tear
in the meniscus.

HALE:
There are a couple options here.

You can sit out

the rest of the season
to heal, or...

...we could give you
cortisone shots,

which would help with the pain
and let you keep playing.

Though playing now would mean
a longer recovery process later.

HALE:
Slightly longer.

What do you think
I should do, Coach?

It's totally your choice.

But it would be a shame
to lose you

so close to the playoffs,
and, uh...

I mean,

you know how much
the team needs you.

I'll do the shots.

Yeah.

("711 Remix" by Emei playing)

♪ Heart coming up my throat ♪

♪ Hold my hair,
I just might choke ♪

♪ Ugh, my tongue is numb ♪

♪ I thought I was having fun ♪

♪ I just got here,
but I'm leaving ♪

♪ Think I'm getting worse
at breathing ♪

♪ I'll avoid
the bad impressions ♪

♪ Diet Coke 7-Eleven ♪

♪ Up and down,
I'm running out of batteries ♪

♪ I just got here,
but I'm leaving ♪

♪ Think I'm getting worse
at breathing ♪

♪ I'll avoid
the bad impressions ♪

♪ Diet Coke 7-Eleven ♪

♪ I just got here,
but I'm leaving ♪

♪ Think I'm getting worse
at breathing ♪

♪ I'll avoid
the bad impressions ♪

♪ Diet Coke 7-Eleven ♪

♪ ♪

MAN:
Go to bed.