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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:02:40,243 --> 00:02:41,452 Come on, everyone! 4 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:19,240 Welcome to A Nonsense Christmas. 5 00:03:19,324 --> 00:03:20,909 You could've been anywhere tonight, 6 00:03:20,992 --> 00:03:23,912 spending time with family, helping the less fortunate, 7 00:03:23,995 --> 00:03:27,498 but instead, you're here, half watching a big screen 8 00:03:27,582 --> 00:03:30,043 while scrolling social media on a smaller screen, 9 00:03:30,126 --> 00:03:32,378 and for that, I'm forever grateful. 10 00:03:33,087 --> 00:03:35,131 This special isn't just about Christmas though. 11 00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:37,383 We're celebrating all the holidays. 12 00:03:37,467 --> 00:03:41,137 So, happy Hanukkah, happy Kwanzaa, 13 00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:42,889 and happy birthday, Natalie. 14 00:03:43,389 --> 00:03:47,060 There's gotta be at least one person named Natalie whose birthday is today, right? 15 00:03:47,143 --> 00:03:48,728 Well, either way, strap on 16 00:03:48,811 --> 00:03:52,065 because tonight, I'm in the mood for a little nonsense. 17 00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:52,250 No, seriously, they told me I could have an unlimited budget as long as I go viral, 18 00:04:52,333 --> 00:04:55,003 so I'm gonna break the set just to do it. 19 00:04:56,170 --> 00:04:57,213 My leg! 20 00:04:57,964 --> 00:04:59,215 He'll be fine. 21 00:05:33,583 --> 00:05:36,669 There are comedy specials, and there are music specials, 22 00:05:36,753 --> 00:05:38,171 and there are holiday specials. 23 00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:41,424 But who does musical comedy holiday specials? 24 00:05:42,091 --> 00:05:43,343 A lot of people. 25 00:05:43,426 --> 00:05:45,803 But do those specials have celebrity guests? 26 00:05:45,887 --> 00:05:47,221 Yes, they do! 27 00:05:47,305 --> 00:05:50,808 Everyone with a musical comedy holiday special does them with celebrity guests, 28 00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:52,977 and this is one of those. 29 00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:11,120 Which means I'm allowed to say 'fuck' three times. 30 00:06:11,788 --> 00:06:12,663 Fuck. 31 00:06:12,747 --> 00:06:14,415 Just one left. 32 00:06:15,291 --> 00:06:16,209 Anyways... 33 00:06:17,585 --> 00:06:19,504 Here we are. 34 00:06:19,587 --> 00:06:21,422 We've arrived at my set. Isn't this cute? 35 00:06:22,090 --> 00:06:24,550 It's exactly what my house looked like growing up. 36 00:06:25,051 --> 00:06:28,971 A tree, three walls, and a live studio audience. 37 00:06:59,335 --> 00:07:02,380 You're in luck. I've trimmed my tree just for you. 38 00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:04,715 Let's start the show. 39 00:07:29,740 --> 00:07:31,075 Happy holidays. 40 00:07:33,369 --> 00:07:35,455 What if it's like, 'Happy holiday...' 41 00:07:35,538 --> 00:07:37,331 No, I'm not British. Okay. 42 00:07:38,624 --> 00:07:40,460 Maybe drier. 43 00:07:41,294 --> 00:07:42,462 Happy holidays. 44 00:07:42,545 --> 00:07:43,754 All right, stand by! 45 00:07:43,838 --> 00:07:45,882 Like, happy holidays. 46 00:07:45,965 --> 00:07:47,383 That's, like, a bit too sultry. 47 00:07:49,802 --> 00:07:52,054 We are rolling. We are rolling. Quiet, please. 48 00:08:03,399 --> 00:08:04,442 I'm not gonna say it. 49 00:08:08,112 --> 00:08:09,155 Okay! 50 00:08:09,238 --> 00:08:10,198 Oh my God. 51 00:08:11,449 --> 00:08:12,450 Guys, it's frozen. 52 00:08:13,743 --> 00:08:15,870 Oh, it's not frozen. Action. 53 00:08:15,953 --> 00:08:17,205 Ooh! 54 00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:18,623 Little beans. 55 00:08:18,706 --> 00:08:19,832 So cute! 56 00:08:19,916 --> 00:08:20,791 Mwah! 57 00:08:21,626 --> 00:08:23,211 Want a drink? 58 00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:26,214 Oh wow. Thank God we installed that seasonal doorbell. 59 00:08:30,092 --> 00:08:32,720 It's Tyla, everybody! 60 00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:35,324 Tell 'em, Tyla. 61 00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:28,085 Come on, everybody. Let's dance. 62 00:10:29,920 --> 00:10:33,174 You all better be standing wherever you guys are watching this. 63 00:10:33,257 --> 00:10:36,135 If you're in your living rooms, come on, dance with us. 64 00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:41,849 Merry Christmas to your brothers. 65 00:10:42,725 --> 00:10:43,768 To your sisters. 66 00:10:43,851 --> 00:10:45,227 To your mister. 67 00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:46,520 To your cousins. 68 00:10:46,604 --> 00:10:48,230 To your dogs? What? 69 00:11:28,646 --> 00:11:30,731 Let's party, everybody. 70 00:11:30,815 --> 00:11:33,234 Merry Christmas to everyone back home. 71 00:11:33,734 --> 00:11:35,569 Merry Christmas, Sabrina. 72 00:11:35,653 --> 00:11:37,905 - Merry Christmas, Tyla. - Yes. 73 00:11:45,329 --> 00:11:47,164 My feathers are all over this place. 74 00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:54,296 Cut, and we cut, and we cut. 75 00:11:58,384 --> 00:12:00,845 Starting from when I was two years old, 76 00:12:00,928 --> 00:12:02,972 my dad would get his VHS 77 00:12:03,055 --> 00:12:05,891 and film our Christmas morning every single year. 78 00:12:06,392 --> 00:12:10,312 And for some reason, I never wanted to open my presents. 79 00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:12,106 I just wanted chocolate cake. 80 00:12:12,690 --> 00:12:14,191 {\an8}- Oh my gosh! - Dad. 81 00:12:14,275 --> 00:12:18,612 {\an8}When we're done opening our presents, can we have a piece of cake? 82 00:12:18,696 --> 00:12:20,364 Is that all you think about? 83 00:12:21,031 --> 00:12:24,368 I just had an ulterior motive, and it was chocolate. 84 00:12:25,619 --> 00:12:27,037 And it kinda still is. 85 00:12:28,581 --> 00:12:31,041 So... ...there's the story. 86 00:15:47,112 --> 00:15:49,114 Sabrina, can I pitch you a 'Nonsense' outro? 87 00:16:06,340 --> 00:16:09,301 - If, like, this was gay, this was gayer. - Right. 88 00:16:09,385 --> 00:16:10,427 - Do you love that? - Yeah... 89 00:16:10,511 --> 00:16:12,513 - I'd use it if I were you. - Owen, I gotta go to set. 90 00:16:12,596 --> 00:16:14,640 - No worries. - Don't sing at me again. 91 00:16:14,723 --> 00:16:15,683 Have a good day. 92 00:16:19,019 --> 00:16:22,022 Debbie, I cannot wait to finally get to meet your man. 93 00:16:22,106 --> 00:16:25,609 You've been a bad friend ever since getting into a relationship. I'm kidding! 94 00:16:27,403 --> 00:16:29,488 No, I know. It's like since we're long distance, 95 00:16:29,571 --> 00:16:32,241 it's just been so hard to combine the friend groups, you know? 96 00:16:32,324 --> 00:16:34,326 - Well, I promise we will love him. - Aw. 97 00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:37,246 Oh, speak of the devil! He's walking up, guys. 98 00:16:38,747 --> 00:16:41,500 - So fun. - Ho ho ho ho ho! 99 00:16:41,583 --> 00:16:45,462 Oh ho ho! There's my nice girl! 100 00:16:45,546 --> 00:16:47,548 Come on over. 101 00:16:47,631 --> 00:16:48,799 Oh my. 102 00:16:48,882 --> 00:16:52,386 Oh! You guys, everyone, this is my boyfriend, Nick. 103 00:16:52,469 --> 00:16:56,181 Well, it is great to meet you. I've heard nothing but great things. 104 00:16:56,265 --> 00:16:58,767 Aw. Same, um, as us. 105 00:16:58,851 --> 00:16:59,768 Yeah. Uh... 106 00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:01,812 Uh, can I get you anything? 107 00:17:01,895 --> 00:17:04,773 Oh, I don't know. Maybe a warm glass of milk. 108 00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:06,358 Yuck. 109 00:17:06,442 --> 00:17:09,111 Ooh, and an oversized chocolate-chip cookie 110 00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:12,531 dusted lightly with candy cane shards, if you've got it. 111 00:17:12,614 --> 00:17:15,784 Oh bummer. I think we're out of shards. 112 00:17:17,286 --> 00:17:19,163 I'm sorry, are people saying 'sharts'? 113 00:17:19,246 --> 00:17:21,081 - 'Shards.' - Oh, look at that. 114 00:17:21,165 --> 00:17:24,543 - My clothes are all covered in soot. - Oh no! Oh no! 115 00:17:24,626 --> 00:17:26,128 - I'll be right back. - Okay. 116 00:17:27,546 --> 00:17:31,717 Hey. This is actually insane, but, um, that's Santa Claus, right? 117 00:17:32,593 --> 00:17:33,594 Oh my God. 118 00:17:34,219 --> 00:17:36,555 What kind of a messed-up thing is that to say? 119 00:17:36,638 --> 00:17:37,514 What? 120 00:17:37,598 --> 00:17:39,391 Debbie, it's not messed up. Hello. 121 00:17:39,475 --> 00:17:41,643 Come on. The big, white, scruffy beard. 122 00:17:41,727 --> 00:17:43,812 So? He did 'No-Shave November.' 123 00:17:44,396 --> 00:17:46,648 - He has the classic big belly. - Yeah. 124 00:17:46,732 --> 00:17:50,277 And there it is. The body shaming. Wow. Wow. 125 00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:52,738 What is this, Mean Girls the movie? The musical? 126 00:17:53,322 --> 00:17:54,782 Okay, chill out. 127 00:17:54,865 --> 00:17:56,700 He's jolly. He's sweet. 128 00:17:56,784 --> 00:17:58,077 He's not Santa. 129 00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:00,370 Okay, we'll drop it. He's not Santa. 130 00:18:00,454 --> 00:18:02,039 - No one's Santa, I guess. - Yeah. 131 00:18:02,122 --> 00:18:04,124 - And he's back! - Oh, hey. 132 00:18:04,208 --> 00:18:05,167 Oh! 133 00:18:05,667 --> 00:18:07,795 I forgot the presents. They're in the car. 134 00:18:08,587 --> 00:18:11,256 - Oh, that's so sweet of you, Nick. - So nice. 135 00:18:11,799 --> 00:18:15,302 So what does he do for a living that he can buy us all gifts? 136 00:18:15,385 --> 00:18:17,429 He told me, but I zoned out because it was boring. 137 00:18:17,513 --> 00:18:20,557 I think he's, like, a toy manufacturer or something. 138 00:18:20,641 --> 00:18:24,228 Uh, Deb, that's what Santa does. 139 00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:26,730 No, because it doesn't pay. 140 00:18:26,814 --> 00:18:28,857 What? Why doesn't it pay? 141 00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:31,527 Yeah. He doesn't make money or have any credit cards. So? 142 00:18:31,610 --> 00:18:33,278 - That's creepy. - That's weird. 143 00:18:34,571 --> 00:18:36,657 Is your boyfriend on the roof? 144 00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:40,410 I mean, he's probably, like, fixing something up there. 145 00:18:40,494 --> 00:18:42,579 He's super handy 'cause, you know, 146 00:18:42,663 --> 00:18:45,249 my boyfriend can actually make something, like a man. 147 00:18:45,332 --> 00:18:47,126 Your boyfriend's just a lazy surgeon. 148 00:18:47,209 --> 00:18:49,169 What the hell, Deb? 149 00:18:49,253 --> 00:18:51,797 Besides, guys, if he was Santa, 150 00:18:52,923 --> 00:18:54,424 then why is he so good in bed? 151 00:18:55,676 --> 00:18:58,428 I'm sorry, is Santa supposed to be, like, bad in bed? 152 00:18:58,512 --> 00:18:59,388 No. 153 00:18:59,471 --> 00:19:02,641 If you read the original Turkish folklore text, 154 00:19:02,724 --> 00:19:04,309 Santa doesn't last. 155 00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:06,186 I didn't read that. 156 00:19:09,231 --> 00:19:12,442 I brought very intentional gifts. 157 00:19:12,526 --> 00:19:14,278 - How thoughtful. - Here you are, my boy. 158 00:19:14,361 --> 00:19:16,363 - It's not weird at all. - Wow. 159 00:19:17,197 --> 00:19:19,867 - Oh my God, a Nerf Vortex Vigilon. - Thank you for my gift. 160 00:19:19,950 --> 00:19:23,328 I loved these growing up. I asked Santa for this every year. 161 00:19:25,497 --> 00:19:26,582 A Tickle Me Elmo. 162 00:19:26,665 --> 00:19:27,666 Oh. 163 00:19:35,799 --> 00:19:36,842 A Tickle Me Elmo. 164 00:19:40,262 --> 00:19:44,057 The only time I ever admitted to wanting one of these is my letter to Santa Claus 165 00:19:44,141 --> 00:19:45,767 when I was 15. 166 00:19:46,351 --> 00:19:48,061 Well, if he's really Santa, 167 00:19:48,145 --> 00:19:51,064 then he'd know the only thing I asked for as a little girl 168 00:19:51,148 --> 00:19:53,066 was to sing a duet with Shania Twain. 169 00:19:55,068 --> 00:19:56,236 Sorry. 170 00:19:58,530 --> 00:20:01,074 Is that Mrs. Claus? 171 00:20:01,158 --> 00:20:02,618 Is my husband here? 172 00:20:03,160 --> 00:20:04,578 Your husband? 173 00:20:04,661 --> 00:20:05,829 You're married?! 174 00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:08,123 We've been married 400 years. 175 00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:10,167 Yes, but after the first hundred, 176 00:20:10,250 --> 00:20:11,835 we decided to be open. 177 00:20:13,378 --> 00:20:14,755 That was my idea. 178 00:20:14,838 --> 00:20:16,381 - Santa! - Santa! 179 00:20:16,465 --> 00:20:17,883 He's not Santa! 180 00:20:28,268 --> 00:20:29,311 Thank you. 181 00:20:33,148 --> 00:20:35,525 Thank you guys so much for coming to be in this sketch. 182 00:20:35,609 --> 00:20:37,277 Oh my God, it's so fun. 183 00:20:37,361 --> 00:20:40,572 I love your set kitchen, by the way. Does any of the stuff really work? 184 00:20:40,656 --> 00:20:42,449 No, but we're gonna fix it all in post. 185 00:20:43,450 --> 00:20:45,577 - Yum! Delicious. - Wow! 186 00:20:50,958 --> 00:20:52,209 Hi, Shania. 187 00:20:53,043 --> 00:20:54,795 - All right, Sabrina. - Are you ready? 188 00:20:54,878 --> 00:20:55,921 I'm so ready. 189 00:22:23,216 --> 00:22:24,301 Sing it! 190 00:23:29,574 --> 00:23:30,951 Shania Twain, everybody. 191 00:23:35,914 --> 00:23:38,083 - That was beautiful, Sabrina. - So beautiful! 192 00:23:38,166 --> 00:23:39,668 Oh my God. I can't believe you're here. 193 00:23:44,381 --> 00:23:45,340 Sabrina! 194 00:23:45,424 --> 00:23:46,842 Thank you, guys! 195 00:24:02,649 --> 00:24:05,569 I'm one of those girls who believes it's better to give than receive 196 00:24:05,652 --> 00:24:06,945 when it comes to presents. 197 00:24:07,028 --> 00:24:09,114 I love to spoil my family. 198 00:24:49,029 --> 00:24:51,615 Hey, you haven't given me anything yet. 199 00:24:51,698 --> 00:24:53,325 Right. 200 00:25:30,362 --> 00:25:31,279 Okay. 201 00:25:49,297 --> 00:25:51,383 So what? He just, like, hangs out? 202 00:25:51,466 --> 00:25:52,968 Yeah, when he's not at work. 203 00:25:53,051 --> 00:25:55,303 - What's his job again? - Oh, I forget. 204 00:26:04,020 --> 00:26:06,439 Seriously, what the hell do I get him? 205 00:26:15,448 --> 00:26:16,449 A phone charger. 206 00:26:17,450 --> 00:26:18,577 I love it! 207 00:26:18,660 --> 00:26:21,204 I've always needed one of these. 208 00:26:21,913 --> 00:26:23,248 You're so interesting. 209 00:26:23,790 --> 00:26:25,083 Where'd you get this? 210 00:26:26,501 --> 00:26:29,629 You're like a genius. You're really something special, Sabrina. 211 00:26:30,213 --> 00:26:31,256 May I hug you? 212 00:26:33,592 --> 00:26:35,218 Yeah. Okay. 213 00:26:35,302 --> 00:26:38,346 You made this a really awesome Christmas. I really care about you. 214 00:26:38,430 --> 00:26:41,099 - Honey, stop hugging my sister. - Oh, I'm sorry about that. 215 00:26:55,196 --> 00:26:56,573 - Hey, Sabrina. - Yeah? 216 00:26:57,282 --> 00:27:01,286 Um, I got an idea for you. I don't know if you're open to... 217 00:27:01,369 --> 00:27:02,203 Sure. 218 00:27:08,126 --> 00:27:09,878 This is not what I usually do, so... 219 00:27:09,961 --> 00:27:11,212 - But, um, yeah. - Okay. 220 00:27:11,296 --> 00:27:14,049 - Let me know what you're... thinking. - Well, I'll just do it. 221 00:27:14,132 --> 00:27:16,176 - Okay, cool. Just, like, go. - Um... 222 00:27:28,772 --> 00:27:31,316 So, like, a... It's like a song? 223 00:27:31,399 --> 00:27:34,361 I mean, like, to me, the whole... It's more the spirit of, like... 224 00:27:36,029 --> 00:27:36,863 Oh, the spirit. 225 00:27:38,239 --> 00:27:42,494 Yeah... Yeah, it's, like, less holiday maybe than we were going... 226 00:27:42,577 --> 00:27:44,037 - Okay. - ...for. 227 00:27:44,120 --> 00:27:46,289 The network might not get it. 228 00:27:48,249 --> 00:27:49,376 Maybe if you say 'the elves.' 229 00:27:49,459 --> 00:27:51,211 Actually, yeah. If you say 'the elves,' maybe. 230 00:27:51,294 --> 00:27:52,128 - Okay, cool. - Cool. 231 00:27:52,212 --> 00:27:53,713 - I'll type something up. - Okay. 232 00:27:53,797 --> 00:27:57,092 - What is your email? - Let me get you my manager's info. 233 00:27:57,175 --> 00:27:59,803 - No, I'd like your personal email. - Okay. 234 00:28:01,596 --> 00:28:04,015 Setting for the duet with Kali Uchis. 235 00:28:04,099 --> 00:28:06,726 All right, steady cam is up. 236 00:28:06,810 --> 00:28:08,812 All right, ladies, you ready? Here we go. 237 00:28:08,895 --> 00:28:09,729 Action. 238 00:30:03,927 --> 00:30:05,512 Ho ho ho! 239 00:30:06,513 --> 00:30:08,723 Ho ho ho. Ho ho ho. 240 00:30:11,226 --> 00:30:13,186 Yo, Cratchit, what up? 241 00:30:13,269 --> 00:30:15,021 Yes, you have work tomorrow. 242 00:30:15,563 --> 00:30:17,357 Why? 'Cause it's Christmas? 243 00:30:17,440 --> 00:30:19,567 What, are we 12, dude? 244 00:30:19,651 --> 00:30:21,444 No, we have content to create. 245 00:30:22,195 --> 00:30:23,363 Yeah. 246 00:30:23,446 --> 00:30:27,075 Be here at nine with a ring light and Nobu breakfast sushi, okay? 247 00:30:27,158 --> 00:30:28,993 All right. Humbug, player. 248 00:30:29,077 --> 00:30:30,078 Adios. 249 00:30:37,126 --> 00:30:38,920 Wakey-wakey. 250 00:30:40,338 --> 00:30:43,758 Annie? Uh, what are you doing here? 251 00:30:43,842 --> 00:30:45,426 I'm the spirit of Ghosted Past. 252 00:30:45,510 --> 00:30:47,887 We went on five dates, and I never heard from you again. 253 00:30:47,971 --> 00:30:51,266 - I... got really busy at work. - Mm. 254 00:30:51,349 --> 00:30:53,685 - And then I... and then I lost my phone. - Mm. 255 00:30:53,768 --> 00:30:55,812 No. I saw you peeping my stories. 256 00:30:55,895 --> 00:30:59,732 That's strange. That's really weird. I gotta talk to Zuck about that. 257 00:31:00,233 --> 00:31:03,236 If you didn't want to keep seeing me, you should've just told me. 258 00:31:03,319 --> 00:31:06,447 I really liked you. What it was was I went out of town. 259 00:31:06,531 --> 00:31:08,825 - I went to this place with no service... - Ugh, shut up. 260 00:31:08,908 --> 00:31:11,077 You ghosted me, and it made me feel crazy 261 00:31:11,160 --> 00:31:14,122 when you're the one that couldn't handle 'an honest conversation.' 262 00:31:14,205 --> 00:31:17,876 Because telling someone you don't wanna date them is awkward AF. 263 00:31:17,959 --> 00:31:20,336 It's worse to leave someone on read! Learn from this! 264 00:31:24,048 --> 00:31:26,342 Hi. 265 00:31:27,594 --> 00:31:30,513 Allie. How... how'd you get in here? 266 00:31:30,597 --> 00:31:32,098 Oh, I figured out where you live 267 00:31:32,181 --> 00:31:35,560 from the breadcrumbs you left on your TikTok for me to find. 268 00:31:35,643 --> 00:31:37,854 - What? - Haven't heard from you in a couple days. 269 00:31:38,438 --> 00:31:42,442 And you said we were going to go see Wicked together, so here I am. 270 00:31:43,234 --> 00:31:46,821 Right. Right. Yes. I... I did say that, didn't I? 271 00:31:46,905 --> 00:31:48,698 I am the spirit of Ghosted Present, 272 00:31:48,781 --> 00:31:51,701 and is it just me or are you ignoring me until I go away? 273 00:31:51,784 --> 00:31:54,245 Allie. It ain't even like that. 274 00:31:54,329 --> 00:31:56,623 You love bombed me for a month, then I never heard from you. 275 00:31:56,706 --> 00:31:58,499 Is it something I did? Is it... 276 00:31:58,583 --> 00:32:00,710 It's not you. It's him. 277 00:32:01,419 --> 00:32:03,963 W... Oh my God. Ghosted Past? 278 00:32:04,047 --> 00:32:06,174 Wait. Oh my God. Ghosted Present. 279 00:32:06,257 --> 00:32:08,301 - I hate that we're meeting like this. - I know. 280 00:32:10,345 --> 00:32:12,055 - I love your bangs. They're cute. - Thank you. 281 00:32:12,138 --> 00:32:14,098 I got them 'cause he ghosted me, so... 282 00:32:15,099 --> 00:32:16,851 By the way, you're about to get ghosted too. 283 00:32:16,935 --> 00:32:19,062 - What?! - Ladies, ladies, please. 284 00:32:20,229 --> 00:32:21,272 I'm a good guy. 285 00:32:21,981 --> 00:32:25,318 - I'm an uncle to daughters. - Okay, why aren't you texting me back? 286 00:32:25,401 --> 00:32:27,362 Life has been crazy. 287 00:32:27,445 --> 00:32:29,322 I mean, my boy Cratchit, 288 00:32:29,405 --> 00:32:32,450 he's got this son with a... crazy cough. 289 00:32:32,533 --> 00:32:33,701 Bob Cratchit? 290 00:32:33,785 --> 00:32:37,038 You barely pay him for editing out your falls in your skateboard videos. 291 00:32:37,121 --> 00:32:40,375 And you invented energy-drink cologne, so we know the money is there. 292 00:32:40,458 --> 00:32:43,044 Whatever. Get off my jock. 293 00:32:45,004 --> 00:32:46,965 Whoo! 294 00:32:47,048 --> 00:32:48,383 Ebby? 295 00:32:50,218 --> 00:32:52,220 Hey. Hi. 296 00:32:52,303 --> 00:32:54,597 It's Bri. From Coachella. 297 00:32:54,681 --> 00:32:56,057 The Sahara Tent. 298 00:32:56,641 --> 00:32:58,726 Right. Bri, yes. 299 00:32:58,810 --> 00:33:01,396 Hello. How is your bird? 300 00:33:01,479 --> 00:33:02,855 Oh, still sick. 301 00:33:03,481 --> 00:33:05,692 But I'm so happy we ran into each other here. 302 00:33:05,775 --> 00:33:07,151 - Yeah. Me too. Hey. - So fun. 303 00:33:07,235 --> 00:33:09,654 Yeah. Wait. Let me get your number. 304 00:33:09,737 --> 00:33:10,780 - Oh, yeah. - What?! 305 00:33:10,863 --> 00:33:12,865 - No! - No! No. 306 00:33:12,949 --> 00:33:14,909 - You're gonna get ghosted. - What? 307 00:33:14,993 --> 00:33:18,287 You're the spirit of Ghosted Future, babe. He's not gonna change. 308 00:33:18,371 --> 00:33:21,666 But he seems so sweet. Oh. 309 00:33:21,749 --> 00:33:23,793 Ugh, I can't believe I even liked you. 310 00:33:24,419 --> 00:33:26,379 You know what? We should just hang out. 311 00:33:26,963 --> 00:33:27,922 Yes! 312 00:33:28,006 --> 00:33:30,508 - Oh my God! - Okay, stop, stop. 313 00:33:30,591 --> 00:33:31,926 Stop, please. 314 00:33:33,886 --> 00:33:36,222 I've seen the errors of my ways. 315 00:33:37,056 --> 00:33:40,226 I'm gonna text back. I'm gonna be transparent. 316 00:33:41,477 --> 00:33:45,648 And I'm gonna have honest conversations, even if they're the difficult ones. 317 00:33:50,153 --> 00:33:52,947 Cratchit? Hey, hombre. 318 00:33:53,614 --> 00:33:54,741 It's Ebby Scrouge. 319 00:33:55,700 --> 00:33:59,245 You don't have to make content tomorrow. It's Christmas! 320 00:34:00,997 --> 00:34:03,624 It's actually no big deal. I like girls anyway. 321 00:34:04,375 --> 00:34:06,377 Ladies, turkey leg for you. 322 00:34:06,461 --> 00:34:07,295 Oh. 323 00:34:07,837 --> 00:34:10,173 - Turkey leg for you. - Thanks. 324 00:34:10,256 --> 00:34:11,632 Turkey leg for you. 325 00:34:11,716 --> 00:34:13,634 - Is it vegan? - Just... just take it. 326 00:34:13,718 --> 00:34:16,012 All right. Merry Christmas! 327 00:34:16,763 --> 00:34:19,307 And God bless us, every one. 328 00:34:30,193 --> 00:34:32,695 My mic is also in between my butt cheeks. 329 00:34:33,196 --> 00:34:34,447 Cut the cam. 330 00:34:36,074 --> 00:34:37,492 What up? It's Nico. 331 00:34:37,575 --> 00:34:38,910 Happy holidays. 332 00:34:38,993 --> 00:34:41,204 Shout out to Sabrina. Thank you for having me. 333 00:34:41,287 --> 00:34:42,330 Merry Christmas. 334 00:34:43,831 --> 00:34:45,416 - Hey, Sabrina. - Hey, Cara. 335 00:34:45,500 --> 00:34:48,086 Are you working on the new lyrics for your 'Nonsense' outro? 336 00:34:55,051 --> 00:34:57,470 No, and I'm kind of worried. I'm really feeling the pressure. 337 00:34:57,553 --> 00:35:00,056 I just don't wanna, like, disappoint the fans, you know? 338 00:35:00,139 --> 00:35:02,350 Don't worry. It's... it's easy, right? 339 00:35:02,433 --> 00:35:03,434 I've got one. 340 00:35:04,185 --> 00:35:06,813 - Gotta give a shoutout to my boy, Nick. - Oh. 341 00:35:06,896 --> 00:35:09,190 Wouldn't let him hit it, just the cane tip. 342 00:35:09,732 --> 00:35:12,860 Guess I stayed consistent with my strange tricks. Right? 343 00:35:12,944 --> 00:35:14,695 - Yeah. - No? 344 00:35:14,779 --> 00:35:18,449 - You can use it. Just give me 10%. - It's not the worst one I've ever heard. 345 00:35:18,533 --> 00:35:20,118 - It's not the worst. - It's not. 346 00:35:20,201 --> 00:35:22,495 I hope I helped. Bye! 347 00:35:25,456 --> 00:35:27,917 Take the tinsel out of your hair as soon as possible. 348 00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:29,418 You love it. 349 00:35:29,502 --> 00:35:30,711 - I love you. - I love you too. 350 00:38:48,617 --> 00:38:49,910 Maybe next year. 351 00:38:49,994 --> 00:38:51,037 Maybe. 352 00:42:01,810 --> 00:42:03,062 Good night, everybody. 353 00:42:06,232 --> 00:42:09,610 You didn't think I was gonna leave you crying on Christmas, did you? 354 00:42:15,449 --> 00:42:17,701 Wait. Missing something. 355 00:42:20,287 --> 00:42:21,121 Hit it! 356 00:44:31,335 --> 00:44:32,169 Whoo! 357 00:45:06,245 --> 00:45:07,871 Aw. Thanks. 358 00:45:09,289 --> 00:45:10,290 Oh! 359 00:45:11,625 --> 00:45:13,669 Oh, a massager. Thank you! 360 00:45:15,170 --> 00:45:16,004 Wow! 361 00:45:17,047 --> 00:45:19,174 The Christmas spirit is so 362 00:45:19,842 --> 00:45:21,051 infectious. 363 00:45:22,177 --> 00:45:27,015 We did it all. Fire juggling, lion wrestling, a live on-camera birth. 364 00:45:27,099 --> 00:45:29,393 Some of this stuff may have been cut out for time, 365 00:45:29,476 --> 00:45:31,854 but truly, this has been such a dream. 366 00:45:31,937 --> 00:45:34,022 Thank you to all my guests for being a part of it. 367 00:45:34,106 --> 00:45:35,941 Thank you to you for being a part of it. 368 00:45:36,024 --> 00:45:38,944 Merry Christmas to all, and to all, a good night. 369 00:45:39,445 --> 00:45:40,988 Love, Sabrina Claus. 370 00:46:14,146 --> 00:46:17,191 They told me I could have an unlimited budget as long as I go viral, 371 00:46:17,274 --> 00:46:19,401 so I'm gonna break the set just to do it. 372 00:46:20,944 --> 00:46:22,905 Reset! Reset! No, no, no! 373 00:46:24,948 --> 00:46:28,327 Well, we should do that one more time. 374 00:46:31,038 --> 00:46:32,206 Whoa! 375 00:46:44,885 --> 00:46:47,846 {\an8}Gotta stay consistent with my strange tricks. 376 00:46:53,060 --> 00:46:54,394 - Yeah. - No? 377 00:46:54,478 --> 00:46:55,479 You can use it. 378 00:46:55,562 --> 00:46:58,690 - I'm not using that. - It's coming. I just needed to... 379 00:46:58,774 --> 00:46:59,817 - Oh, it's coming. - Yeah. 380 00:46:59,900 --> 00:47:01,902 I've used that, so... 381 00:47:03,862 --> 00:47:05,030 You look so beautiful. 382 00:47:05,113 --> 00:47:07,449 I look so... straight. 383 00:47:07,991 --> 00:47:09,868 You look so straight?! 384 00:47:11,870 --> 00:47:14,206 - Did you... - Here we go! 385 00:47:14,748 --> 00:47:16,416 - Three... - No. Don't say that. 386 00:47:16,500 --> 00:47:18,001 - Not now! - Not now. 387 00:47:19,044 --> 00:47:21,004 {\an8}All right, ladies, you ready? Here we go. 388 00:47:22,631 --> 00:47:24,883 This is not my... you know, my typical... 389 00:47:24,967 --> 00:47:26,426 - Oh, whoa. - Let me take it again. 390 00:47:37,938 --> 00:47:40,774 I think I should be in, um, one of the songs. 391 00:47:42,568 --> 00:47:44,361 {\an8}How do you appear out the mist again? 392 00:47:51,577 --> 00:47:54,788 When you say something's gay, do you know what you're saying? Knock it off. 393 00:47:56,415 --> 00:47:57,291 And that's true. 394 00:48:02,671 --> 00:48:05,674 Should I be singing... 395 00:48:05,757 --> 00:48:08,635 Did you guys hear? I sounded kinda like Sabrina. Right? No one? 396 00:48:08,719 --> 00:48:11,179 {\an8}- We've been married 400 years. - Yeah. 397 00:48:11,263 --> 00:48:14,641 And after the first hundred, we agreed to be 398 00:48:15,809 --> 00:48:16,810 separate. 399 00:48:18,353 --> 00:48:19,187 Wait, what? 400 00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:24,318 Yeah, and after the first hundred, we agreed to be separate. Open! 401 00:48:24,401 --> 00:48:27,029 - Just tickle your Elmo. - Open. Open. 402 00:48:27,613 --> 00:48:29,573 Ho ho ho. 403 00:48:29,656 --> 00:48:31,158 Can't even say that anymore. 404 00:48:40,918 --> 00:48:42,377 And that's Christmas. 405 00:48:42,461 --> 00:48:43,795 And that's Christmas. 406 00:48:46,423 --> 00:48:47,674 Fuck. 27944

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