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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,210 --> 00:00:11,550 HUGO: I'm pretty sure I know who's got me. 2 00:00:11,650 --> 00:00:14,110 - Argh! - Cassie. Would you like coffee? 3 00:00:14,210 --> 00:00:15,710 No, thanks. I don't know what's in it. 4 00:00:15,810 --> 00:00:17,800 MAUREEN: It was just a microdose. 5 00:00:17,900 --> 00:00:19,520 CASSIE: Didn't feel very micro to me. 6 00:00:19,620 --> 00:00:21,600 Xylazine. A common cattle tranquilliser. 7 00:00:21,700 --> 00:00:24,000 Oh, hi. I'm looking for Gareth. 8 00:00:24,100 --> 00:00:25,280 I was gonna interview him. 9 00:00:25,380 --> 00:00:26,760 Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! 10 00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:28,520 LEON: If you wanna know what goes down in Bidgee, 11 00:00:28,620 --> 00:00:29,800 I'm your man. 12 00:00:29,900 --> 00:00:31,690 One time, over at Charmaine's, 13 00:00:31,790 --> 00:00:34,810 hippies booked out two caravans, and whooshka! 14 00:00:34,910 --> 00:00:36,210 (GARETH GRUNTS) 15 00:00:36,310 --> 00:00:38,830 ANDY: You planted evidence to get me arrested! 16 00:00:39,910 --> 00:00:41,910 - (GARETH SCREAMS) - (THUMP!) 17 00:00:44,720 --> 00:00:47,720 - (GRITTY PUNK ROCK MUSIC) - (GULLS CAW) 18 00:00:55,080 --> 00:00:56,630 SONG: ♪ Seven o'clock 19 00:00:56,730 --> 00:01:00,030 ♪ Get up, get ready 20 00:01:00,130 --> 00:01:04,010 ♪ To start the day at the factory 21 00:01:20,140 --> 00:01:22,570 ♪ 7:30 22 00:01:22,670 --> 00:01:24,610 ♪ Clock in 23 00:01:24,710 --> 00:01:26,210 ♪ Get ready 24 00:01:26,310 --> 00:01:29,790 ♪ To start work at the factory 25 00:01:33,390 --> 00:01:35,140 ♪ 7:30 26 00:01:35,240 --> 00:01:36,660 ♪ Clock in... ♪ 27 00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:37,900 (TRUCK RUMBLES) 28 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:39,300 ♪ Get ready 29 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:42,620 ♪ To start work at the factory 30 00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:46,180 ♪ Keep the country moving with production 31 00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:48,510 ♪ Keep the country moving with production 32 00:01:48,610 --> 00:01:50,710 ♪ Keep the country moving with production 33 00:01:50,810 --> 00:01:52,630 ♪ Keep the country moving with production 34 00:01:52,730 --> 00:01:54,470 ♪ Keep the country moving with production 35 00:01:54,570 --> 00:01:56,150 ♪ Keep the country moving with production 36 00:01:56,250 --> 00:01:57,710 ♪ Keep the country moving with production 37 00:01:57,810 --> 00:01:59,110 ♪ Keep the country moving with production 38 00:01:59,210 --> 00:02:00,640 ♪ Keep the country moving with production... ♪ 39 00:02:00,740 --> 00:02:05,080 (OVERLAPPING VOCALS SPEED UP) 40 00:02:05,180 --> 00:02:07,560 ♪ Production, production, production, production 41 00:02:07,660 --> 00:02:08,840 ♪ Production, production 42 00:02:08,940 --> 00:02:10,360 ♪ Production, production 43 00:02:10,460 --> 00:02:12,520 ♪ Production, production, production ♪ 44 00:02:12,620 --> 00:02:14,630 (VOCALS ECHO AND FADE) 45 00:02:15,550 --> 00:02:17,550 - (CICADAS CHIRP) - (UNEASY MUSIC) 46 00:02:22,190 --> 00:02:23,930 Hey, it's trivia tonight, right? 47 00:02:24,030 --> 00:02:25,940 I was thinking of bringing my recording gear. 48 00:02:26,040 --> 00:02:28,440 Try and capture the vibe of the town. 49 00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:32,140 Are you cancelling trivia? 50 00:02:32,240 --> 00:02:33,900 Can't do it without Hugo. 51 00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:36,420 (CASSIE SIGHS) That's what the town needs. 52 00:02:36,520 --> 00:02:38,710 You know, to keep going. To not lose hope. 53 00:02:38,810 --> 00:02:41,110 I just mean Hugo's the quizmaster. 54 00:02:41,210 --> 00:02:42,990 Who else is gonna do it? 55 00:02:43,090 --> 00:02:46,990 OK, well... can't you be the quizmaster? 56 00:02:47,090 --> 00:02:48,750 Like, in Hugo's honour? 57 00:02:48,850 --> 00:02:52,480 Should I do Cedric's half-time poetry as well? 58 00:02:52,580 --> 00:02:54,580 - (CHUCKLES LIGHTLY) - Not happening. 59 00:02:55,820 --> 00:02:57,080 CASSIE: OK. 60 00:02:57,180 --> 00:02:58,960 What if I was quizmaster? 61 00:02:59,060 --> 00:03:00,600 You? 62 00:03:00,700 --> 00:03:02,120 I can do it. 63 00:03:02,220 --> 00:03:04,610 Come on, it'll be good for morale, good for business. 64 00:03:04,710 --> 00:03:06,450 And great for your podcast. 65 00:03:06,550 --> 00:03:08,210 (SCOFFS) That's just an unexpected bonus. 66 00:03:08,310 --> 00:03:10,310 You reckon you got the chops? 67 00:03:11,630 --> 00:03:13,630 I already know my first question. 68 00:03:17,920 --> 00:03:19,300 VOICEMAIL: Hey, this is Andy. 69 00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:20,900 I can't come to the phone right now, 70 00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:22,820 so leave a message and have a great day. 71 00:03:22,920 --> 00:03:24,920 - (BEEP!) - Where are you? 72 00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:28,160 (THOUGHTFULLY) Jimmy? 73 00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:30,810 Hmm. 74 00:03:35,690 --> 00:03:37,030 Cedric! 75 00:03:37,130 --> 00:03:39,130 (UNEASY MUSIC) 76 00:03:44,380 --> 00:03:46,380 (WHEEL SQUEAKS) 77 00:03:51,820 --> 00:03:53,820 - (HATCH CREAKS) - (UNSETTLING MUSIC) 78 00:03:58,830 --> 00:04:00,830 Cedric, it's me. (ECHOES) 79 00:04:03,830 --> 00:04:06,330 It's trivia night tonight and, uh, I thought 80 00:04:06,430 --> 00:04:09,240 me and you, you know, the old team, we could... 81 00:04:11,520 --> 00:04:13,520 What was that name we came up with? 82 00:04:16,320 --> 00:04:19,220 (CHUCKLES) Beauty and the Priest. 83 00:04:19,320 --> 00:04:21,330 (SOFTLY) Nah. 84 00:04:22,490 --> 00:04:25,530 (SIGHS) I'm not even a priest anymore anyway. 85 00:04:26,970 --> 00:04:28,970 Look... 86 00:04:30,090 --> 00:04:31,470 I'm sorry, mate. 87 00:04:31,570 --> 00:04:33,570 (SCOFFS) 88 00:04:37,100 --> 00:04:39,100 JIMMY: Cedric. (ECHOES) 89 00:04:43,740 --> 00:04:46,500 (HATCH CREAKS) 90 00:04:48,710 --> 00:04:50,090 (HATCH THUDS SHUT) 91 00:04:50,190 --> 00:04:52,190 (BLEAK MUSIC) 92 00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:07,860 I'm so sorry. The vendor's slow on getting me a section 52. 93 00:05:07,960 --> 00:05:10,220 I'm chasing the insurance claims history. 94 00:05:10,320 --> 00:05:11,820 MAN ON PHONE: And it's a business, yeah? 95 00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:13,670 - It's a caravan park. - Cause of damage? 96 00:05:13,770 --> 00:05:14,830 CASSIE: Fire apparently. 97 00:05:14,930 --> 00:05:16,350 Oh, yeah, here it is. 98 00:05:16,450 --> 00:05:18,230 Uh, "Claim denied due to fraud." 99 00:05:18,330 --> 00:05:19,670 The claim was deemed fraudulent? 100 00:05:19,770 --> 00:05:22,910 According to our records. Matter deferred to police. 101 00:05:23,010 --> 00:05:24,510 Anything else you need? 102 00:05:24,610 --> 00:05:27,380 Oh, no. Thank you so much. You've been very helpful. 103 00:05:29,820 --> 00:05:30,920 (SOFTLY) OK. 104 00:05:31,020 --> 00:05:33,020 (UNEASY MUSIC) 105 00:05:37,780 --> 00:05:40,810 (DOOR SQUEAKS) 106 00:05:40,910 --> 00:05:42,910 (WATER PATTERS) 107 00:05:47,230 --> 00:05:48,730 CASSIE: Andy?! 108 00:05:48,830 --> 00:05:51,340 - Jesus. Cassie. - Where the hell have you been? 109 00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:53,220 I've been trying to call you nonstop. 110 00:05:53,320 --> 00:05:54,660 Uh... 111 00:05:54,760 --> 00:05:56,460 (SIGHS) I don't know. 112 00:05:56,560 --> 00:05:58,620 I, uh... passed out. 113 00:05:58,720 --> 00:06:00,500 What happened to your face? 114 00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:02,140 Oh, I, uh... 115 00:06:02,240 --> 00:06:04,470 I tripped and fell down some rocks. 116 00:06:04,570 --> 00:06:07,470 I was... so wasted, 117 00:06:07,570 --> 00:06:12,250 I, uh... I went outside for some air and I got lost. 118 00:06:13,370 --> 00:06:16,400 (STAMMERS) When I woke up, I was miles from anywhere, 119 00:06:16,500 --> 00:06:18,500 so I... 120 00:06:18,980 --> 00:06:21,600 Is it... Do you mind if I finish my shower, please? 121 00:06:21,700 --> 00:06:24,420 Yeah. Um, I need you to be at trivia tonight. 122 00:06:25,420 --> 00:06:26,600 Trivia? 123 00:06:26,700 --> 00:06:28,320 Please? For moral support? I'm the host. 124 00:06:28,420 --> 00:06:30,430 You won't want to miss it. 125 00:06:31,390 --> 00:06:32,530 Yeah. 126 00:06:32,630 --> 00:06:34,650 Yeah. Yeah, that sounds great. I'll, uh... 127 00:06:34,750 --> 00:06:36,210 I'll be there. 128 00:06:36,310 --> 00:06:38,310 - CASSIE: Hmm. - (UNEASY MUSIC) 129 00:06:41,710 --> 00:06:43,260 (CICADAS CHIRP) 130 00:06:43,360 --> 00:06:45,380 - (MICROPHONE FEEDBACK WHINES) - CASSIE: Test, test. 131 00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:47,540 One, two. One, two? 132 00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:49,340 (TOWNSFOLK CHATTER) 133 00:06:49,440 --> 00:06:50,900 CHARMAINE: OK, we can win this. 134 00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:52,900 NOEL: There's about 12 sausages in that thing! 135 00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:54,180 MAUREEN: OK, here we go. 136 00:06:54,280 --> 00:06:57,150 Welcome to the Bidgee Pub trivia night, 137 00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:59,030 where a fresh meat tray is up for grabs. 138 00:06:59,130 --> 00:07:00,750 (TOWNSFOLK CHEER) 139 00:07:00,850 --> 00:07:03,270 CASSIE: I'm very excited to be your host. 140 00:07:03,370 --> 00:07:06,590 So without further ado, let's get into it. 141 00:07:06,690 --> 00:07:08,800 - Question one... - CEDRIC: Wait a minute. 142 00:07:08,900 --> 00:07:11,400 Oh, look who's back. 143 00:07:11,500 --> 00:07:13,500 (TOWNSFOLK MUTTER) 144 00:07:15,460 --> 00:07:17,920 We have a meat tray to win. 145 00:07:18,020 --> 00:07:19,720 - Uh, no, they don't. - No. 146 00:07:19,820 --> 00:07:21,450 - Look at that. - (TOWNSFOLK MURMUR AND CHUCKLE) 147 00:07:21,550 --> 00:07:23,550 (CHAIR LEGS SCRAPE) 148 00:07:26,470 --> 00:07:28,890 CASSIE: OK. Question one. 149 00:07:28,990 --> 00:07:32,410 Octopuses have been described as the Einsteins of the sea. 150 00:07:32,510 --> 00:07:35,340 They have eight tentacles and two eyes, 151 00:07:35,440 --> 00:07:37,460 but how many hearts? 152 00:07:37,560 --> 00:07:39,980 (TOWNSFOLK MURMUR) 153 00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:42,700 Easy. It's one. Trick question. 154 00:07:42,800 --> 00:07:44,900 No, she's not gonna start with a trick question. 155 00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:47,070 Oh, true, eh? You know who'd know this? 156 00:07:47,170 --> 00:07:49,170 Gareth. 157 00:07:50,050 --> 00:07:51,510 He loves the sea. (ECHOES) 158 00:07:51,610 --> 00:07:53,470 - (BAG RIPS) - (GARETH SCREAMS) 159 00:07:53,570 --> 00:07:55,270 - (MUFFLED, ECHOING SOUNDSCAPE) - CASSIE: True or false? 160 00:07:55,370 --> 00:07:58,170 There are more kangaroos than people in Australia. 161 00:07:59,780 --> 00:08:01,680 (TOWNSFOLK MURMUR) 162 00:08:01,780 --> 00:08:04,800 (UNEASY MUSIC) 163 00:08:04,900 --> 00:08:07,200 CASSIE: What year did the Berlin Wall fall? 164 00:08:07,300 --> 00:08:08,400 True or false? 165 00:08:08,500 --> 00:08:10,160 It's physically impossible... 166 00:08:10,260 --> 00:08:11,930 (TOWNSFOLK MURMUR) 167 00:08:12,030 --> 00:08:13,810 CASSIE: What's the singular word... 168 00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:16,310 (TOWNSFOLK MURMUR) 169 00:08:18,190 --> 00:08:19,770 CASSIE: OK, time for a gear change. 170 00:08:19,870 --> 00:08:21,850 Ooh. Bible knowledge? 171 00:08:21,950 --> 00:08:23,210 No. Party drugs. 172 00:08:23,310 --> 00:08:25,900 Has anyone ever had their cocktail spiked? 173 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:27,540 No? 174 00:08:27,640 --> 00:08:29,220 When a drink is spiked, 175 00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:31,940 chances are the drugs came from a dealer. 176 00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:36,020 What is the maximum penalty for drug dealing in this state? 177 00:08:36,120 --> 00:08:38,590 Is it A - 40 years? 178 00:08:38,690 --> 00:08:40,470 B - 25 years? 179 00:08:40,570 --> 00:08:43,030 Or C - three years? 180 00:08:43,130 --> 00:08:44,670 VAL: Well, it's not three. 181 00:08:44,770 --> 00:08:46,870 - I thought the maximum... - Maximum? 182 00:08:46,970 --> 00:08:49,310 - MAUREEN: Or is it B? 25 years? - AUDREY: What do you reckon? 183 00:08:49,410 --> 00:08:50,960 - Leon? - Huh? 184 00:08:51,060 --> 00:08:53,000 - 40... - I don't care. Put anything. 185 00:08:53,100 --> 00:08:54,840 MAUREEN: I know this. Listen. Wait. 186 00:08:54,940 --> 00:08:57,160 - I've gotta think of the answer. - (JINGLES BELL) 187 00:08:57,260 --> 00:08:59,560 CASSIE: OK, that's the end of the round, folks. 188 00:08:59,660 --> 00:09:01,480 - We'll take a short break. - CEDRIC: Um... (CLEARS THROAT) 189 00:09:01,580 --> 00:09:03,250 CASSIE: Yep. OK. 190 00:09:03,350 --> 00:09:05,890 Uh, in keeping with tradition, apparently, 191 00:09:05,990 --> 00:09:07,850 Cedric will now read a poem. 192 00:09:07,950 --> 00:09:09,890 OK, yeah. That's more like it. Yeah. 193 00:09:09,990 --> 00:09:11,410 - Cedric! - Yay. 194 00:09:11,510 --> 00:09:12,930 (TOWNSFOLK APPLAUD HALF-HEARTEDLY) 195 00:09:13,030 --> 00:09:15,030 (SIGHS AND CLEARS THROAT) 196 00:09:16,600 --> 00:09:19,700 (CEDRIC CLEARS THROAT) 197 00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:21,220 (CHUCKLES) 198 00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:22,740 (CROAKS) 199 00:09:22,840 --> 00:09:25,120 - Nup. - (CEDRIC CONTINUES CROAKING) 200 00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:28,020 - (CHUCKLES) - Shh! 201 00:09:28,120 --> 00:09:30,130 CEDRIC: They come 202 00:09:30,850 --> 00:09:32,430 They come 203 00:09:32,530 --> 00:09:34,530 They come for us... 204 00:09:35,250 --> 00:09:38,390 ...across the Pacific from foreign lands 205 00:09:38,490 --> 00:09:42,220 Tasked with solving just one prob-lam 206 00:09:43,340 --> 00:09:45,000 But from their presence 207 00:09:45,100 --> 00:09:46,720 - A thousand troubles... - Hey. 208 00:09:46,820 --> 00:09:49,360 What's with these questions? You're pissing everybody off. 209 00:09:49,460 --> 00:09:50,800 Shut up. Just trust me, alright? 210 00:09:50,900 --> 00:09:52,440 - It'll be worth it. - (JIMMY SHUSHES) 211 00:09:52,540 --> 00:09:55,610 CEDRIC: A toad I am 212 00:09:55,710 --> 00:09:57,330 (CROAKS) 213 00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,930 - (CHAIR LEGS SCRAPE LOUDLY) - (CEDRIC CONTINUES CROAKING) 214 00:10:00,030 --> 00:10:01,130 ANDY: Sorry. 215 00:10:01,230 --> 00:10:02,770 (CEDRIC CROAKS) 216 00:10:02,870 --> 00:10:05,210 Oh, Gareth. Pick up the phone, man. 217 00:10:05,310 --> 00:10:06,690 Where are ya? 218 00:10:06,790 --> 00:10:09,360 (CEDRIC CONTINUES CROAKING AND RECITING FAINTLY) 219 00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:14,680 - (LEON INHALES) - Nice night. 220 00:10:16,600 --> 00:10:18,540 - (LEON EXHALES LOUDLY) - ANDY: So many stars, you know? 221 00:10:18,640 --> 00:10:22,630 Different, uh, constellations down here. 222 00:10:22,730 --> 00:10:25,650 You know, when, uh... when I was younger, I... 223 00:10:26,770 --> 00:10:28,770 (LEON SPITS) 224 00:10:30,250 --> 00:10:32,250 - (SIGHS) - (PHONE RINGS) 225 00:10:33,540 --> 00:10:35,800 Oh, thank God. Dom. Listen. 226 00:10:35,900 --> 00:10:37,160 WOMAN ON PHONE: Andy? 227 00:10:37,260 --> 00:10:38,560 It's Liliana. 228 00:10:38,660 --> 00:10:41,360 (SPLUTTERS) 229 00:10:41,460 --> 00:10:43,480 (CLEARS THROAT) Sorry, hi, Liliana. 230 00:10:43,580 --> 00:10:46,190 (VOICE WAVERS) Hey, has anyone called you... 231 00:10:47,190 --> 00:10:48,730 ...about Dom? 232 00:10:48,830 --> 00:10:50,610 What? What about... what about Dom? 233 00:10:50,710 --> 00:10:52,710 Well, he, um... 234 00:10:53,630 --> 00:10:55,330 Dom's dead, Andy. 235 00:10:55,430 --> 00:10:58,640 (LILIANA SOBS) They found his body in a dumpster. 236 00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:01,540 He was shot. 237 00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:03,860 Robbery gone wrong or something. 238 00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:05,860 (SPARSE PERCUSSIVE MUSIC) 239 00:11:05,960 --> 00:11:07,960 Oh, God... 240 00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:10,920 (MUSIC INTENSIFIES) 241 00:11:18,690 --> 00:11:20,690 (SNIFFS) 242 00:11:27,860 --> 00:11:29,860 (BREATHES DEEPLY) 243 00:11:33,500 --> 00:11:35,780 What the fuck am I doing here? 244 00:11:54,920 --> 00:11:57,100 Hope you're not thinking about stealing a car 245 00:11:57,200 --> 00:11:58,860 and leaving town, hot stuff. 246 00:11:58,960 --> 00:12:01,340 - (CHUCKLES) - Uh... 247 00:12:01,440 --> 00:12:03,450 Hey, uh... 248 00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:05,890 ...how's trivia night going? 249 00:12:06,770 --> 00:12:08,550 Your girlfriend invited me. 250 00:12:08,650 --> 00:12:10,710 She's not my... Uh... 251 00:12:10,810 --> 00:12:12,630 (STAMMERS) Why? 252 00:12:12,730 --> 00:12:14,550 Yeah. (CHUCKLES) That's what I said. 253 00:12:14,650 --> 00:12:16,200 Oh, well. 254 00:12:16,300 --> 00:12:17,920 Better be good, 255 00:12:18,020 --> 00:12:20,260 otherwise I'll book her for wasting my time. 256 00:12:23,980 --> 00:12:25,480 Someone hit you over the head? 257 00:12:25,580 --> 00:12:29,050 The... (STAMMERS) My... my... my what? 258 00:12:29,150 --> 00:12:31,750 Well... seem stupider than normal. 259 00:12:37,070 --> 00:12:39,070 Do I look alright? 260 00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:44,500 And that's the cry 261 00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:46,300 The constant cry 262 00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:48,140 Jesus Christ on a bike. 263 00:12:48,240 --> 00:12:50,600 (TEARFULLY) I want to be alone. 264 00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:54,010 (CEDRIC CROAKS) 265 00:12:54,330 --> 00:12:56,150 (CROAKS) 266 00:12:56,250 --> 00:12:57,470 (CROAKS SADLY) Yes. 267 00:12:57,570 --> 00:12:58,830 Thank you. 268 00:12:58,930 --> 00:13:01,530 (SCATTERED APPLAUSE AND LAUGHTER) 269 00:13:02,810 --> 00:13:04,810 VAL: Yep. Well done. 270 00:13:05,890 --> 00:13:07,900 What do you think you're doing? 271 00:13:08,940 --> 00:13:11,320 - What, trivia? - No, this ain't trivia. 272 00:13:11,420 --> 00:13:14,320 Who won the cricket? What's the capital of Rome? 273 00:13:14,420 --> 00:13:16,420 That's trivia. 274 00:13:18,740 --> 00:13:20,810 I told you that shit in confidence, yeah? 275 00:13:20,910 --> 00:13:23,410 It was for a podcast, Leon. 276 00:13:23,510 --> 00:13:25,510 A podcast, was it? 277 00:13:26,390 --> 00:13:28,390 You breathe one word about me... 278 00:13:29,270 --> 00:13:31,270 ...you'll see what happens. 279 00:13:39,560 --> 00:13:41,560 CEDRIC: Did you get it? 280 00:13:43,040 --> 00:13:45,630 Who called the cops? I did. 281 00:13:45,730 --> 00:13:48,950 Big hello to Sergeant Geraldine Walters. 282 00:13:49,050 --> 00:13:52,130 - JIMMY: Oh. How you doin'? - G'day. 283 00:13:54,970 --> 00:13:56,910 CASSIE: OK, quick score check. 284 00:13:57,010 --> 00:13:59,080 In the lead, we have Beauty and the Priest. 285 00:13:59,180 --> 00:14:00,080 (TOWNSFOLK EXCLAIM) 286 00:14:00,180 --> 00:14:02,160 Followed by Bidgeegud Republic. 287 00:14:02,260 --> 00:14:03,880 (HISSES VICTORIOUSLY) 288 00:14:03,980 --> 00:14:06,220 LEON: Very nice. Very nice. 289 00:14:10,990 --> 00:14:13,530 - (MUFFLED, ECHOING SOUNDSCAPE) - LEON: Oh. Oi! 290 00:14:13,630 --> 00:14:15,290 Oi! (ECHOES) 291 00:14:15,390 --> 00:14:19,050 (CLEAR VOICE) Dickhead. No fucking phones. 292 00:14:19,150 --> 00:14:20,690 CASSIE: That's right, Leon. 293 00:14:20,790 --> 00:14:22,650 Phone down, Andy, or you'll be disqualified. 294 00:14:22,750 --> 00:14:25,700 Amateur. Don't worry. It's off. 295 00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:27,380 Shoot. 296 00:14:27,480 --> 00:14:28,860 CASSIE: Alright. 297 00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:30,300 Here we go. 298 00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:33,300 What was the name of Hugo's dog? 299 00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:35,400 NOEL: That's pretty easy. 300 00:14:36,610 --> 00:14:38,350 It was Reggie. 301 00:14:38,450 --> 00:14:40,450 LEON: You're good at this. 302 00:14:41,210 --> 00:14:42,670 True or false? 303 00:14:42,770 --> 00:14:46,150 Late last year, Charmaine went to Perth for three months 304 00:14:46,250 --> 00:14:48,980 to take care of a sick aunt. 305 00:14:50,060 --> 00:14:51,600 Everyone knows that. 306 00:14:51,700 --> 00:14:53,700 - MAUREEN: True. - (TOWNSFOLK MURMUR) 307 00:15:00,700 --> 00:15:02,090 CASSIE: OK. 308 00:15:02,190 --> 00:15:04,610 Now, what is the maximum prison sentence 309 00:15:04,710 --> 00:15:07,010 for insurance fraud in this state? 310 00:15:07,110 --> 00:15:09,090 Is it A - one year? 311 00:15:09,190 --> 00:15:11,770 B - 10 years? 312 00:15:11,870 --> 00:15:14,010 Or C - 12 years? 313 00:15:14,110 --> 00:15:17,560 I know this. It's 10 years. 314 00:15:20,440 --> 00:15:22,740 - MAUREEN: You sure? - Yes, I'm fucking sure. 315 00:15:22,840 --> 00:15:24,140 - It's 10. - SHOSHANNA: I think it's 10. 316 00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:26,780 What common nut can poison a dog, 317 00:15:26,880 --> 00:15:29,810 causing it to lose control of its nervous system and die? 318 00:15:35,610 --> 00:15:38,370 (MUTTERS INDISTINCTLY) 319 00:15:39,850 --> 00:15:41,160 I know. Just... 320 00:15:41,260 --> 00:15:44,240 CASSIE: What is the most common cause of house fire? 321 00:15:44,340 --> 00:15:46,080 Is it A - faulty wiring? 322 00:15:46,180 --> 00:15:48,160 B - candles? 323 00:15:48,260 --> 00:15:50,360 Or C - cooking? 324 00:15:50,460 --> 00:15:53,050 (MAUREEN MURMURS INDISTINCTLY) 325 00:15:53,150 --> 00:15:55,390 It's candles. Remember? Yeah. 326 00:16:00,150 --> 00:16:02,150 Final question of the night. 327 00:16:03,270 --> 00:16:06,860 There are motives responsible for nearly all murders. 328 00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:09,260 - What are they? - Hmm. 329 00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:11,260 CASSIE: One point for each correct motive. 330 00:16:11,360 --> 00:16:13,740 What the devil is she up to? 331 00:16:13,840 --> 00:16:16,060 This round will determine tonight's winner 332 00:16:16,160 --> 00:16:17,380 and we're gonna mark it together, 333 00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:19,630 so I need you to swap answers with another team. 334 00:16:19,730 --> 00:16:22,230 JIMMY: Will you pass it to us? 335 00:16:22,330 --> 00:16:24,330 LEON: Andy! 336 00:16:25,890 --> 00:16:27,890 There you go. 337 00:16:28,410 --> 00:16:30,190 No fucking funny business, eh? 338 00:16:30,290 --> 00:16:32,300 (LAUGHS) 339 00:16:33,940 --> 00:16:35,280 CASSIE: OK, everyone, ready? 340 00:16:35,380 --> 00:16:37,160 - TOWNSFOLK: Mm-hm! - CASSIE: Alright. 341 00:16:37,260 --> 00:16:40,140 Hugo's dog's name was Reggie. 342 00:16:41,380 --> 00:16:43,380 An easy point. 343 00:16:43,740 --> 00:16:45,530 Because it all started with Reggie. 344 00:16:45,630 --> 00:16:47,250 God rest his soul. 345 00:16:47,350 --> 00:16:49,130 Hugo loved that dog. 346 00:16:49,230 --> 00:16:51,010 - But Charmaine hated him... - Hmm? 347 00:16:51,110 --> 00:16:53,370 ...because he did his business on her doorstep every morning. 348 00:16:53,470 --> 00:16:55,930 Hey! Hugo trained him to do it. 349 00:16:56,030 --> 00:16:58,620 So when Reggie turned up dead, who do you think he suspected? 350 00:16:58,720 --> 00:17:00,720 CEDRIC: Huh? 351 00:17:01,560 --> 00:17:03,420 - This is stupid. - CASSIE: OK. 352 00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:05,420 What common nut can kill a dog? 353 00:17:05,520 --> 00:17:07,860 Answer - the macadamia nut. 354 00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:09,830 It shuts down the dog's nervous system, 355 00:17:09,930 --> 00:17:12,310 which is the tortured way that Reggie died. 356 00:17:12,410 --> 00:17:16,630 Next answer - what is the most common cause of house fire? 357 00:17:16,730 --> 00:17:18,810 The answer is C - cooking. 358 00:17:19,810 --> 00:17:21,630 So it's unusual that the fire 359 00:17:21,730 --> 00:17:24,000 that destroyed Charmaine's caravans 360 00:17:24,100 --> 00:17:25,480 was started by hippies 361 00:17:25,580 --> 00:17:27,000 too stoned to snuff out their candles. 362 00:17:27,100 --> 00:17:29,520 Unless of course that was a lie? 363 00:17:29,620 --> 00:17:31,620 (FLAMES WHOOSH) 364 00:17:32,860 --> 00:17:36,330 And if it was, how would the insurance company ever find out? 365 00:17:36,430 --> 00:17:38,050 Who do you think you are? 366 00:17:38,150 --> 00:17:40,250 The caravan park went to rack and ruin. 367 00:17:40,350 --> 00:17:42,770 The insurance payout would have been enough 368 00:17:42,870 --> 00:17:45,410 to get you out of debt, enough to start again. 369 00:17:45,510 --> 00:17:47,690 Hugo knew Charmaine torched those vans. 370 00:17:47,790 --> 00:17:49,820 So he had a way to undo her. 371 00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:51,580 He tipped off the insurance company 372 00:17:51,680 --> 00:17:53,700 to make sure that she never got paid. 373 00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:56,940 The perfect revenge if it was Charmaine who killed Reggie. 374 00:17:57,040 --> 00:17:59,700 - I don't have to listen to this. - Sit down. 375 00:17:59,800 --> 00:18:01,150 CASSIE: It's just a theory, folks. 376 00:18:01,250 --> 00:18:02,670 It's just a theory. 377 00:18:02,770 --> 00:18:04,770 But tonight's not all about Charmaine. 378 00:18:05,730 --> 00:18:08,150 This is from when Hugo attended a cocktail party 379 00:18:08,250 --> 00:18:09,550 at Maureen and Trevor's. 380 00:18:09,650 --> 00:18:11,770 I found this photo of him passed out. 381 00:18:15,020 --> 00:18:17,020 His drink was spiked. 382 00:18:17,620 --> 00:18:20,460 Heart palpitations. Nausea. 383 00:18:21,660 --> 00:18:23,680 Hugo could have died that night. 384 00:18:23,780 --> 00:18:27,210 And when he found out that the "special ingredient" 385 00:18:27,310 --> 00:18:28,730 came from Leon, 386 00:18:28,830 --> 00:18:30,770 he had the ammo he needed. 387 00:18:30,870 --> 00:18:35,010 The maximum penalty for drug dealing is B - 25 years. 388 00:18:35,110 --> 00:18:36,370 LEON: Jesus. 389 00:18:36,470 --> 00:18:37,450 But Hugo was murdered 390 00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:39,560 before he had the chance to tell the cops. 391 00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:47,060 What a fucking load of horseshit. 392 00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:49,340 I didn't kill Hugo. 393 00:18:49,440 --> 00:18:52,310 And I'm not a fuckin' drug dealer, OK? 394 00:18:52,410 --> 00:18:54,390 And why would Hugo blame me 395 00:18:54,490 --> 00:18:55,750 for something that happened 396 00:18:55,850 --> 00:18:57,790 at one of those seedy parties that they have? 397 00:18:57,890 --> 00:18:59,590 He's been to hundreds of 'em. 398 00:18:59,690 --> 00:19:02,150 Yeah, how about you just stick to answers, you know... 399 00:19:02,250 --> 00:19:04,910 Um... Like facts. 400 00:19:05,010 --> 00:19:06,840 - Yeah! - GERALDINE: If you have any. 401 00:19:06,940 --> 00:19:08,400 LEON: Fuckin' facts. 402 00:19:08,500 --> 00:19:09,840 OK. 403 00:19:09,940 --> 00:19:13,400 Well, if Hugo had been to those parties before, 404 00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:15,200 he'd have had Maureen's cocktails. 405 00:19:15,300 --> 00:19:16,840 So why couldn't he handle it this time? 406 00:19:16,940 --> 00:19:19,250 (SIGHS) There was a mix-up. 407 00:19:19,350 --> 00:19:22,330 A guest mixed Hugo too strong a drink 408 00:19:22,430 --> 00:19:24,170 and he had a reaction. 409 00:19:24,270 --> 00:19:27,610 That's all. But he was fine. OK? 410 00:19:27,710 --> 00:19:28,690 Who was the guest? 411 00:19:28,790 --> 00:19:30,860 That's private. 412 00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:32,580 LEON: Fucking exactly. 413 00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:36,260 It's a pub, Your Honour. Not a fucking courtroom. 414 00:19:36,360 --> 00:19:39,220 - MAUREEN: Thank you! - You're way off about this town. 415 00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:41,260 You'd think we'd turn on one of our own? 416 00:19:41,360 --> 00:19:43,360 Hear, hear. 417 00:19:44,130 --> 00:19:46,370 Well, she was right about me. 418 00:19:48,490 --> 00:19:49,630 I'm not a priest. 419 00:19:49,730 --> 00:19:51,310 I never was. 420 00:19:51,410 --> 00:19:54,710 I tried, but I lied to you. 421 00:19:54,810 --> 00:19:56,190 (SCOFFS) 422 00:19:56,290 --> 00:19:58,600 But thanks to this one, I've faced up to stuff 423 00:19:58,700 --> 00:20:00,800 that I've been running away from for years. 424 00:20:00,900 --> 00:20:03,400 Ahh! I even met up with my family. 425 00:20:03,500 --> 00:20:05,440 - How did it go? - Good. 426 00:20:05,540 --> 00:20:07,680 Mm. For a day or so. 427 00:20:07,780 --> 00:20:11,650 Then I had a row with my brother and my mum. 428 00:20:11,750 --> 00:20:13,050 The whole lot of them, actually. 429 00:20:13,150 --> 00:20:14,570 I had to get out of there. 430 00:20:14,670 --> 00:20:16,250 So I'm back. 431 00:20:16,350 --> 00:20:18,970 Anyway, look, the point is... 432 00:20:19,070 --> 00:20:21,330 Jimmy, no-one cares... 433 00:20:21,430 --> 00:20:24,140 ...if you're a real priest or not. 434 00:20:24,240 --> 00:20:26,140 - Do we? - TOWNSFOLK: No. 435 00:20:26,240 --> 00:20:27,620 No. Absolutely not. 436 00:20:27,720 --> 00:20:31,520 The point is... you're our priest. 437 00:20:32,840 --> 00:20:33,940 Yeah? 438 00:20:34,040 --> 00:20:37,310 Just like Cedric is... our... 439 00:20:37,410 --> 00:20:39,310 - What, murderer? - ..."artist". 440 00:20:39,410 --> 00:20:41,670 (CHUCKLES) Wait a minute. 441 00:20:41,770 --> 00:20:43,670 Are you saying I'm not a real artist, 442 00:20:43,770 --> 00:20:45,790 but that's OK because I'm... 443 00:20:45,890 --> 00:20:48,840 No, what he's saying is it doesn't matter who you are, 444 00:20:48,940 --> 00:20:50,640 because you're one of us. 445 00:20:50,740 --> 00:20:52,480 Unlike some. 446 00:20:52,580 --> 00:20:54,580 (UNEASY MUSIC) 447 00:21:01,150 --> 00:21:02,970 But I'm still your quizmaster. 448 00:21:03,070 --> 00:21:05,090 Now, do you wanna win a meat tray or not? 449 00:21:05,190 --> 00:21:07,610 - Well, yeah. - I mean, yeah. 450 00:21:07,710 --> 00:21:10,130 - We are in here... - I would like a meat tray. 451 00:21:10,230 --> 00:21:12,010 - (LEON MUTTERS) - AUDREY: Let's concentrate. 452 00:21:12,110 --> 00:21:14,340 Maureen just said a guest at that party 453 00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:16,740 poured Hugo a strong drink. 454 00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:18,380 Maybe it was an accident. 455 00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:20,100 Or maybe it was meant to kill him. 456 00:21:20,200 --> 00:21:25,100 The person who poured that lethal drink was Charmaine. 457 00:21:25,200 --> 00:21:27,230 Charmaine wanted Hugo dead that night 458 00:21:27,330 --> 00:21:29,390 and this photo proves that she was there. 459 00:21:29,490 --> 00:21:31,070 That's Charmaine's leg in the photo. 460 00:21:31,170 --> 00:21:33,470 - What? - CASSIE: Her pearl diver tattoo. 461 00:21:33,570 --> 00:21:35,270 Why would I want Hugo dead? 462 00:21:35,370 --> 00:21:37,550 Because he dobbed you in to the insurance company 463 00:21:37,650 --> 00:21:39,080 as revenge for killing his dog. 464 00:21:39,180 --> 00:21:42,520 But not even Hugo had thought through the consequences, 465 00:21:42,620 --> 00:21:44,320 considering that the maximum jail time 466 00:21:44,420 --> 00:21:46,600 for insurance fraud is B - 10 years. 467 00:21:46,700 --> 00:21:48,080 (CLICKS FINGERS) Knew it. 468 00:21:48,180 --> 00:21:49,560 CASSIE: Charmaine got off lightly 469 00:21:49,660 --> 00:21:52,770 with just a three-month sentence and a good behaviour bond. 470 00:21:52,870 --> 00:21:54,770 She told everyone that she was going to look after 471 00:21:54,870 --> 00:21:57,130 her sick aunt, but of course that was false. 472 00:21:57,230 --> 00:21:59,890 - You and your big mouth, Val. - Me? 473 00:21:59,990 --> 00:22:02,130 You were the only one who knew where I really was. 474 00:22:02,230 --> 00:22:03,970 CASSIE: The three most common motives for murder 475 00:22:04,070 --> 00:22:06,420 are money, jealousy and revenge. 476 00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:09,260 It was revenge on Charmaine's mind when she left jail. 477 00:22:09,360 --> 00:22:10,860 So she went to Maureen's cocktail party 478 00:22:10,960 --> 00:22:13,020 and tried to poison Hugo. 479 00:22:13,120 --> 00:22:15,620 And when it didn't work, Charmaine was furious. 480 00:22:15,720 --> 00:22:18,270 So she confronted Hugo at his UFO site. 481 00:22:18,370 --> 00:22:20,910 You got into an argument and you grabbed a tyre iron 482 00:22:21,010 --> 00:22:23,010 and you smacked him over the head with it. 483 00:22:25,330 --> 00:22:26,830 You hauled his body into the ute 484 00:22:26,930 --> 00:22:29,030 and you drove him out into the middle of nowhere. 485 00:22:29,130 --> 00:22:33,380 You doused his body in petrol and you set him alight. 486 00:22:41,260 --> 00:22:44,650 That didn't happen. That never happened. 487 00:22:44,750 --> 00:22:46,250 I didn't kill him. 488 00:22:46,350 --> 00:22:48,770 This is your pearl I found at the UFO site. 489 00:22:48,870 --> 00:22:50,770 No, it isn't. 490 00:22:50,870 --> 00:22:53,130 You wanted revenge for the money you never got 491 00:22:53,230 --> 00:22:54,530 and the jail time you served. 492 00:22:54,630 --> 00:22:55,530 YOU killed him. 493 00:22:55,630 --> 00:22:57,260 - You lying little slag. - Uh-uh! 494 00:22:57,360 --> 00:23:00,140 - No, come on. - You killed Hugo? 495 00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:01,900 CHARMAINE: No, she's full of shit. 496 00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:03,300 Shoshy, I... 497 00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:06,700 - Shoshanna, wait! - Oh, yeah, that's right, Val. 498 00:23:06,800 --> 00:23:09,110 Acting like the mother you're not, you motor-mouth bitch. 499 00:23:09,210 --> 00:23:12,390 You want to talk motive. What about Val? 500 00:23:12,490 --> 00:23:15,390 Hugo treated you like his personal ATM. 501 00:23:15,490 --> 00:23:16,910 Owed you a shit ton of money. 502 00:23:17,010 --> 00:23:20,310 Then when you found out he was rooting around behind your back, 503 00:23:20,410 --> 00:23:23,640 you finally had enough of being used, so you killed him. 504 00:23:23,740 --> 00:23:26,880 Get out. I want you out! 505 00:23:26,980 --> 00:23:29,160 VAL: Pretending to be my Shoshy's mum. 506 00:23:29,260 --> 00:23:31,200 Trying to make up for not taking good enough care 507 00:23:31,300 --> 00:23:33,200 of your own little Bobby John when he was alive. 508 00:23:33,300 --> 00:23:36,330 (YELLS) Get out! All of you! Trivia's over! 509 00:23:36,430 --> 00:23:38,570 Oh, hang on. Who's getting the meat tray? 510 00:23:38,670 --> 00:23:41,010 Hey! You have to come now. 511 00:23:41,110 --> 00:23:42,370 Hurry! 512 00:23:42,470 --> 00:23:44,750 - (TOWNSFOLK MUTTER) - CHARMAINE: Wait. 513 00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:50,400 (EERIE SYNTH MUSIC) 514 00:24:00,290 --> 00:24:02,290 Hugo? 515 00:24:05,890 --> 00:24:07,890 Where am I? 516 00:24:15,500 --> 00:24:18,500 (SYNTH MUSIC INTENSIFIES) 36424

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