All language subtitles for Just.Short.of.Perfect.2021.1080p.NF.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.x264-NPMS-HI

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Original subtitles

[heart beating]

[heartbeat quickens]

["Corazón" by Boricua Boys playing]

- [dog barks] - [whistles]

NETFLIX PRESENTS

Hey, big guy!

Oh, you're such a cute boy!

Hi!

[answering machine beeps]

[woman] Ivana, my darling. What on earth happened?

I've been calling you all day. I even sent you a WhatsApp text message.

- [Ivana laughs] - It's easier to get hold of the Pope!

Don't forget the dress fitting for your brother's wedding.

You better be there, missy! Mwah, mwah, mwah.

- Momma loves you. Bye! - [sighs]

[machine beeps]

[man 1] Ivana, have you lost your cell again?

Jeez, you're always so damn clumsy.

Well, not my problem anymore.

Yeah, that's for sure.

- Look, today is my day to be with Dino. - [gags]

I'll pick him up later.

My God. I wish you could've had a better man for a father.

- My bad. - [whimpers]

My bad.

- [machine beeps] - [man2] Hello, Home.

Am I calling "Home"?

You don't know me, I just found your cell phone.

So I'm calling the "Home" number on your contact list.

I assume that's where the owner lives.

Well, I can get it back to you.

So, Home... [chuckles]

...when you get home, call me. I mean, call yourself.

So just call your number and I'll pick up.

[phone rings]

- [man 2] Hello, Home? - [Ivana] That's me, Home.

[Ivana chuckles]

Thank goodness you came across my phone. My entire life's in there.

- I know. - What do you mean?

You've been through my photos?

Oh, my God. I gotta get a password.

No, I didn't. No need to worry.

I was at the coffee shop. I saw you leaving it behind.

I tried to run and give it to you, but some horse beast dragged you away.

- Ah. Who? Dino? - That's what you call that monster?

[Ivana chuckles] Come on. Don't say that. He's a cutie.

A little bulky, that's all.

I love my baby boy very much, you know?

I also have a baby of my own.

Oh, yeah? What kind?

Human one!

- [laughs] - A 19-year-old mutt named Manu.

- So you... - [water gushing]

What's your name? I shouldn't keep calling you "Home."

No, Ivana.

I'm Ricardo,

but people call me Lion.

[gasps] You gotta be kidding me!

No, it's fine. I guess you can call me whatever you like.

Peacock, killer whale, or even piglet...

[Ivana] No, that's not it. My bathtub started overflowing.

- Right... - [busy tone]

[chuckles]

[sighs]

[phone ringing]

[water sloshes]

- Lion? - [man 1 chuckles] Lion?

You used to call me Tiger.

What is it, Danilo? Hurry up, I'm waiting on a call.

From?

None of your business.

Why didn't you pick up your phone?

- I lost it. - Again? That's the third time this year.

Danilo, listen to me. We are divorced now.

We're divorced now.

My phone is my business, not yours.

- Okay. I'm on my way to pick up Dino. - [Dino whimpers]

- Not tonight. - I'm on my way.

And I'm gonna need some dog food.

You're such a cheapskate!

My dog is not going over there so you can forget to feed him.

I'll sue you so I can see my dog.

Go ahead and sue me already. He's my baby.

That bastard.

No one's gonna take you away from Mommy. No one.

[sighs]

[ringing tone]

- Lion? - Hey! Hi!

You fixed your problem?

[sighs] Which one?

Well, your bathtub.

Oh, yeah that. That's been fixed.

There's others, huh?

Well, I don't even know you.

Well, if that's an invitation, then I'm in.

[laughs]

Maybe we can have lunch tomorrow? Or a coffee?

Listen, I'd really love to, but...

I have to give back your phone. Remember?

Okay.

Okay. We'll get coffee.

Marvelous.

Tomorrow morning at 10:00 at the same coffee shop.

It's a deal. Oh, by the way, how am I supposed to know if it's you?

I've seen you, remember?

- [laughs] - See you tomorrow, Home!

["L-O-V-E" playing]

♪ L is for the way you look at me... ♪

BASED ON THE MOVIE "CORAZÓN DE LEÓN" WRITTEN AND DIRECTED BY MARCOS CARNEVALE

♪ V is very, very, extraordinary ♪

♪ E is even more than anyone that you adore can ♪

♪ Love is all that I can give to you... ♪

- [Ivana] Morning. - Morning.

An espresso.

- Short or tall? - Short.

I like it short.

[reporter on TV] Brazil awaits the Pope's first public appearance.

He is expected at Sé Cathedral for the official ceremony

scheduled to take place this morning.

[sighs]

- Thank you. - [waiter] You're welcome.

Oh...

[groans]

[whimpers]

God, no!

[sighs]

SAVE THE PLANET

Oh, ridiculous... [groans]

[sighs]

[Ricardo] Home?

I'm right down here... [chuckles]

[gasps]

Am I too late?

I'm really glad we met up again, you know?

Met up again?

Oh, yeah, right!

We did meet. You had seen me.

- [chuckles] - Another short?

Short? No, I'll have a tall one this time.

Short for you?

Uh, just a water for me, thank you.

You have something to say but can't find the words, right?

Sagittarius. I could see you were wondering!

[laughing]

First things first, right?

So, here's your phone.

Oh, thank you.

My ID.

- ID, but why? - To show you that I'm a grown man.

[laughs]

Thank you.

[chuckles]

[Ivana] Indeed.

So, what do you do?

- I'm an attorney. - Oh, are you now?

Yeah, I specialize in divorce litigation.

Broken hearts are my specialty, so if you need me, you have my number.

- No, I'm not married. - Good.

Seriously, good for you.

Marriages are awful. I don't recommend them.

A piece of advice from an attorney. Never get married, never!

I'm a widower.

Oh...

- Sorry. - Oh, no. Not at all.

But if I do get married again and it fails, I'll know who to call, huh?

[both chuckle]

What do you do?

I also work with broken hearts.

Actually, I work as a surgeon.

Well, in fact...

Let me see something. Hang on.

Your hand.

Hm...

Uh-huh...

What? Am I okay?

You're good, relax.

[sighs] "Relax."

I'm having a hard time with Danilo hanging around...

Danilo? Who's Danilo?

Danilo is my ex.

My ex, as well as my future ex-associate.

But he is one of these people who is always so...

Difficult. Difficult!

[laughs nervously]

So that's why you're so stressed out?

Yeah, that too.

But it's not just that.

I'm getting divorced, so I'm moving out.

And my new apartment is littered with all these boxes.

I'm looking for another office.

I'm so overwhelmed, I just feel like throwing everything to the wind.

- You know? - Well, you know...

I might just be able to help you.

Just one second.

[tapping keypad]

My dear Doctor Jairo!

Do you think you could squeeze me in? Let's say,

in about an hour? Oh, yeah?

For two people.

Perfect, perfect. That's great. Great!

Okay, okay. Bye.

Shall we?

Where are we going?

Are you afraid of heights?

- [screaming] - [laughing]

Oh, my God!

[Ricardo] What do you think?

You told me this was some kind of therapy.

Yes, Jairo is my therapist.

You said you felt like throwing it all to the wind.

I wasn't being literal!

- [Ricardo] It's beautiful! - [Ivana] You're crazy!

I'm not crazy, I'm unforgettable.

Oh, my God! I gotta get down.

I wanna get down. Go back!

We'll be down in just a bit, down that way.

No, if I jump, I'll die. I have a dog to take care of.

And my brother's wedding to go to.

If I die before his wedding, my mom's gonna kill me!

Three!

[groans]

- No! Don't let me go! - Two!

Ivana, from this point on, you're stuck with me.

One!

- [Ivana yells] - [Ricardo] Woo-hoo!

[screaming]

[Ricardo] Look at that!

Whoa!

- Isn't this just beautiful? - No, no, no!

No!

I haven't even opened my eyes though!

Don't do that. Open them up!

- You're missing the best part of it! - [squeals]

[exclaims]

- Beautiful, right? - [Ivana laughs]

[Ricardo] Everything looks so small from up here, right?

It's beautiful!

[both laugh]

- But I did it! I really did it! - [laughs]

[laughs] I can't believe that I actually did it!

- [Ricardo chuckles] - It's wonderful! Wonderful!

I told you it was. Are you feeling relieved?

- [chuckles] Of what? - Of your problems.

- I wasn't even thinking about all that. - [phone rings]

Just a second. Hi.

Yes, this is Dr. Leão speaking.

Uh, yes, of course. I'm on my way.

So prep everything and I'll be right there, okay?

Yeah, okay, that's fine. See you.

Um, Ivana, I'm so sorry,

but there's an emergency. I gotta run and take care of it.

But I can give you a ride if you like.

Of course.

- Yeah. That'd be nice. - Okay, good. Let's go then.

[laughing] Well, I knew you'd love it.

[sirens blaring]

[reporter] This is Sacred Heart Hospital where the Pope is hospitalized.

No information about his situation has been disclosed this far.

Devotees are gathering in front of the hospital,

waiting for official information.

[indistinct chatter]

[Ricardo] Calm down, everything will be fine.

I had the most amazing day with you.

And, well, I gotta run now.

Could we do this again? If you want, of course.

Course, yeah, I'd love that.

I'd really love that.

Gotta go.

[sighs]

Wait, hang on!

I don't have your number.

I actually added my number to your phone's contact list.

- Ricardo Leão. - Ah!

- Bye, Home. - [Ivana laughs]

[chuckles]

[Ricardo] So, I'm assuming

you've got him prepped and ready.

Ma'am, journalists aren't allowed to be in here.

No, I'm not a reporter.

Who's that in there? Someone famous?

- It's the Pope! - The Pope?

- [nurse] He's not feeling well. - [Ivana] The poor Pope.

No need to worry, he's in very good hands.

- Oh. - Dr. Leão is the best.

- He even saved my mother-in-law. - Oh, yeah?

- Not that I wanted him to do that. - [laughs]

[heart monitor beeping]

[Ricardo] Are you wearing heels, Cláudia? That's a little unfair!

- Now, let's work a miracle, shall we? - [humming]

[Ricardo] They aren't looking all that enthusiastic over there.

Now pay close attention. A once-in-a-lifetime situation.

Ah...

[Ricardo] Hi!

Am I late?

- [sighs] - Ah.

- Well... - [journalist] W-wait...

Just a sec.

[mic screeches]

Do you need help?

No, thank you, I don't need any help.

[clears throat]

[chuckles]

Habemus papam.

[man] Hurray!

Oh, hey, do you need help?

[applause continues]

- Dad? - [door closes]

I'm home, sweetie.

What's up, Dad? Look what I made.

[Ricardo] Jeez, honey. Ham, cheese and salami.

- Wow. Lord have mercy! - Mm-hm.

May none of my patients ever find out about this.

Mm! So, how was your day?

Mm. It was chill.

I met a girl, went skydiving.

- Operated on the Pope. - You're kidding!

You met a girl?

Didn't you hear me say the Pope surgery thing?

Who cares about the Pope?

Tell me about her. Is she pretty? Can I see a photo?

Oh, no!

Give it back! Hey! Ho! Give it back, child!

- Stop it! - What's the matter?

Did you send her nudes?

Of course not. Are you crazy?

Wow, she's so pretty!

And tall. Good for you, Lion.

- [Ricardo] I know, right? - Mm-hm.

- So, are you asking her on a date? - Mm.

Very good question. How should I do it?

Do I send her one email today and a confirmation tomorrow?

Or should I send both emails tomorrow?

Dad, relax, you don't have to be so anxious.

- Girls don't like to rush into things. - Oh.

You shouldn't take too long either. The key is to find the midway.

Go smoothly and a little mystery wouldn't hurt.

Ah...

Hey, where did you learn all of this?

- Google. - Mm-hm, Google.

Huh.

[reporter on TV] The Pope is still hospitalized

after undergoing an emergency surgery.

From São Paulo, Maurício Pessoa.

The world's attention was on the Pope's health this afternoon.

He was hospitalized as soon as he landed in Brazil.

Dr. Ricardo Leão was in charge,

a world-renowned cardio-thoracic surgeon.

We're here now with Dr. Ricardo Leão,

the Brazilian cardiologist who performed surgery on the Pope.

Tell us, Doc, what was the Pope's situation?

Um... [clears throat]

His heart is simply too big.

[Maurício] The Vatican's statement said the Pope will leave hospital soon.

His recovery is stable thanks to this big, little doctor.

I bought the minibar long before I made the mistake of marrying you.

- The minibar belongs to me. - Prove it.

- Do you have proof? - You want proof?

No. It's my word against yours.

I took the liberty of making an inventory

of all the items here, in the office.

Under whose orders?

No one's, but I thought it'd be good since we're practically in a courtroom.

All right, well done. Now we can do this the right way. Let's go.

Well, according to the records, the transaction was made

long before your wedding, and it was purchased by Ivana.

Therefore, the minibar belongs to her.

Ivana wins it and the case is closed.

Yeah, well, okay. What about this painting?

Where's the dossier for that?

[laughing]

This painting was a gift from your mom. You can have it.

[Danilo] Huh...

Okay, good.

Um, this chair?

Not the chair. It belonged to Grandpa.

- No. - Do not go there.

No, honey, your grandpa truly loved me.

[Corina] Well, according to the records,

Ivana's grandpa didn't actually love you. He was merely being polite.

- And so, that's her chair. - [bangs gavel]

[sighs] Fine. You can have the chair, the minibar...

What about me? Do I get this stapler here?

It is yours actually.

- Oh... - [Corina bangs gavel]

- I'm also taking Corina. - No.

Corina is mine.

Corina, I want you to work with me.

Um, and what is your proposal?

You can start at ten in the morning.

I'll give you Fridays off.

- One-and-a-half-hour lunch break. - 35 days paid vacation.

A 10% increase to your salary.

I'll double your salary.

- You prick. - [Danilo] There.

Corina is mine, that's been settled.

In fact, go get me a coffee. Hurry up.

I think you'll be needing to look for another assistant,

because I'm staying with Ivana.

- [Danilo] Are you crazy? - [bangs gavel]

No, it's just that Ivana is a whole lot nicer than you.

[sarcastic] You're surprised, huh? You didn't know?

[Danilo] Okay.

What about the office? Because I'm not gonna be leaving.

But I will. I'm leaving.

This office is too small for me anyway.

I'm gonna find a bigger one, a better one, okay, hun?

- I want that in writing. - Write the damn thing and I'll sign it.

This is all a terrible choice.

The really terrible choice was marrying you, Danilo.

I woke up smiling this morning just envisioning my bright and happy future

far away from you, sweetheart.

[Danilo] What is she... Happy about what?

What, she's... [sighs]

...getting a divorce. Why is she happy?

I think you answered that yourself. [scoffs]

ATTORNEYS AT LAW

Angela, Ivana Tavares here.

Listen, I need to move out of my office right away.

If you find something in the area, will you tell me?

Oh! But it has to be bigger, okay?

So call me. See you.

[phone chimes]

[Ricardo] Hey, Home, how are you?

So, shall we jump?

[sighs]

[voice recorder beeps]

So I'll see you in an hour.

[Ivana] Too bad.

Well, maybe it'll let up soon.

Ah, sure, it's not so bad. It's just some drizzle.

[thunder crashes]

[laughs]

- Afraid of thunder? - No, no.

Too bad, I really wanted to go diving with you again.

Yeah...

But maybe we can go to plan B.

And what's that?

Afraid of the dark?

[Ivana chuckles]

[Ivana sighs]

[moaning]

Mm...

- [Ricardo] Do you like it? - Mm.

It's so...

It's so incredible, Leão.

[Ricardo] You want more?

[moans]

More?

I don't know if I can take it though.

[Ricardo] Of course you can.

Mm...

- [moans] - [chuckles]

[groans]

Oh, my God!

[chuckles]

It's so cool!

[Ricardo] Hm.

But where are we?

This is a little slice of paradise

stuffed with caramel and doused in chocolate.

[giggles]

Hang on, I think you have a little dab here.

- Where is it? - Right, here.

[romantic music playing]

[Manu] Okay, Dad, then what?

Smashed her?

My God, honey, come on. There's no smashing.

Since it's a lady, um,

I'd say we got intimate.

[Manu squeals]

- What? - No, nothing.

Tell me what happened then.

It so happened that we shared a kiss.

- [chuckles] - So, how did you feel?

I felt this thing like... [exhales]

- Like a shiver? - Yeah, yeah.

After that, my head...

Was spinning?

Exactly, spinning.

- [sighs] - Huh. So?

So then...

Suddenly, it was as if the world just stopped.

And it was just us two.

No one else.

[squeals]

Stop saying "Eee," Manu.

I'm terribly sorry, Dr. Leão.

I think your case might be extremely serious.

Hm? Why?

Dad, you're falling in love.

I'm not in love!

That's not what it is.

I'm not falling in love with her.

Am I?

- Mm-hm. - Nah.

I think I am.

[laughs]

Oh, Manu, no, I'm not. No!

I don't know how to do this. The last person I fell for was your mom.

- I don't know how to handle it. - Dad, but it's just like riding a bike.

I can't ride a bike. My legs can't reach the pedals.

Dad, come on, don't be silly, you know what I mean.

I do.

Why don't you just open your heart to her?

What if she rejects the donor?

No woman would reject that heart of yours, Dad.

[chuckles] Oh, sweetie.

Well, the diagnosis is clear.

- I'm going to bed. - Okay.

Look, you're gonna be a great physician, you know.

[laughs]

[sighs happily]

I think I've fallen in love.

[Márcia] Odete, I don't know what to do with Ivana. I really don't.

I told her not to divorce.

I said, "Ivana, changing husbands is just changing problems."

Did she hear? No, of course not.

Because she never does. Isn't that right, Adolfo?

- Actually... - She's going to the ceremony alone!

- Can you believe it? - [Ivana] I'm here.

Hi, Mom.

- Hi, Odete. How are you? - Hi.

Hi, Dad.

- Is this the dress here? I'll try it on. - Yes.

Look at her, all sad and lonely.

This whole situation is too hard for her.

Don't you think so, Adolfo?

- Ow! - I'm sorry.

"Ow."

Ivana, are you okay?

I'm excellent!

And?

What do you think? Do I look good? Mm?

[laughs]

I love it, Odete. It's beautiful.

Yes...

Well, it's fitted well, but it's a little too plain.

Yeah, it's plain, but it's still not done yet, right?

Maybe take out the sleeves. Show a little more of your arms.

- [phone chimes] - Yeah, take the sleeves out. That's fine.

MORNING, HOME! I'LL COME BY AT 8 P.M.

[Márcia] Maybe some embroidery in the neckline to make it stand out.

Embroidery? Sure, Mom. I love embroidery.

Let's put some embroidery right here.

And make the hemline shorter because you're always stumbling around...

Yeah. Maybe hem it to show my heels a little.

It's in style. Yeah, do that.

Maybe throw a few sparkles in there to make you glitter a little, yeah?

Oh, sparkles?

Yeah, great idea. You're gonna make me outshine the newlyweds.

[laughs]

Ivana, what the hell is wrong with you?

What's wrong? What did I do?

Are you actually agreeing with me?

Yeah, I believe that I am.

Why would you do that? That's completely out of character.

Yeah, because I think you're right.

I'm right? Since when? You never think I'm right!

Ivana, what's going on with you?

Are you taking drugs now?

Have you been drinking? Let me smell you.

Cut it out! Hey, Dad, can you please say something?

- I think... - [Márcia] Did you join a cult?

Were you abducted by cult weirdos? God, bring my daughter back!

Stop it, Mom!

See, it's like impossible to please you, huh?

That's precisely what you're doing right now.

So, why are you screaming?

I don't know!

Habit.

- [tuts] - [phone chimes]

My goodness. Well, I gotta go.

You can do whatever she wants to do. I trust you.

But don't pinch the waistline too much.

Bye!

I'll buy you a pair of shoes for next time.

Don't forget about bunch... the bush...

- Brunch. - I can buy the shoes for this.

And it's "brunch." Mwah!

[laughs] Mom!

[Márcia sighs]

- She is not herself. - [scoffs] Well, that's not the case...

Pfft!

[salsa music playing]

Are you riding a horse?

Wrong movie, Dad.

Are you kidding me?

Oh, dear God!

Nice one.

- Huh? Like it? - Nailed it, Dad.

Don't you think I look a little taller?

- Huge. - No, I'm being serious.

Honey, I think...

that these shoes are giving me one more inch in height.

Look here.

Don't I look a little taller?

Dad, you're still cute anyway.

Don't wanna be cute. I'm a... [roars] Lion.

Hey, about that, I need to tell you something.

Did you get your exam scores yet?

No, not yet.

Okay, but listen, it doesn't matter what college you go to.

The college doesn't make the doctor. It's the other way around.

- Dad, that's not it. - I'm nervous, sweetie. I'm just nervous.

Oh, I brought you a few flavored condoms, okay?

This one is extra thin.

This one here is citrus flavored.

We have a catuaba one too. Super cool.

- [gags] - This one is barbecue.

- Very good. - I'm never eating barbecue again.

This is the lightsaber one.

I dated this geek once, and he was really into it.

Ah! I want... La, la, la...

That is TMI. Daddy doesn't want to hear that.

- Thank you. - I don't want to share my inheritance.

You done? All right, I gotta get going.

I'd like a baby brother though.

What? No way.

[chuckles]

This girl...

I definitely look taller. I really do.

I'll go with lightsaber and barbecue.

[whooshing lightsaber noises]

[elevator dings]

- Hey! - You're late, but what's new?

- [Danilo sighs] - Such a pain. God...

- Here. Take this first. - Okay.

Hey, he loves his new bone here.

Frederico is here.

This here is his favorite, but remember,

it's just two drops in the mornings, okay?

Gotta go. Bye, my baby.

- Aren't you inviting me inside? - Never.

Bye, baby, you're gonna be fine.

It's only gonna be for a couple of days. My beautiful baby.

[Dino whimpers]

He's acting a little weird, isn't he? Have you been badmouthing me?

That is parental alienation, you know.

Don't be ridiculous. Okay, now go!

Fine. You look nice.

You going out?

None of your goddamn business. Get out of here!

- Get out of here. Go! - Come on, kiddo.

Where are you going? Take the staircase.

You know Dino gets claustrophobic.

Honey, that's eight flights of stairs.

I couldn't care less.

Go take the stairs!

- Come on, buddy. - For Christ's sake.

I'm so sick of you.

- Slowly. - [Dino barks]

Dino, don't run! Wait!

- Wait for Daddy! No! Oh, Dino! - [clattering]

[elevator dings]

Good evening, Mr. Lourival.

[Ricardo] Hm...

- [Ivana] Hi. - Hi.

You look beautiful.

[both chuckle]

[Ivana] Well?

Shh! Get back, get back.

What the hell was that?

[door closes]

[sirens wailing]

[Ivana sighs]

Leão?

Password.

Password?

[whistles "La Cucaracha"]

[indistinct chatter]

[gasps]

Okay.

All right. Not even my phone has a password.

[suspenseful music playing]

[bossa nova music playing]

[Ivana] Wow!

[laughs]

Oh, my goodness. This is incredible!

- Do you come here often? - Not really.

Mr. Leão! What an honor.

I just have one of those faces.

[chuckles]

- [host] Aren't you playing tonight? - No.

You can play?

Not so much. It's really just for fun.

I'm not playing tonight, I'm accompanying this lady here tonight.

It'd be highly rude of me to leave her alone.

No, don't be silly.

No, I'd love to see you play.

Do it. Just one, just one for me.

- I'll play a special one for you. - Yeah.

You're a little rat.

- [Ivana chuckles] - [Ricardo grunts]

[music ends]

[crowd cheers]

[jazzy bass line plays]

["Bamboléo" by the Gypsy Kings playing]

♪ Ese amor llega asi de esta manera ♪

♪ No tiene la culpa ♪

♪ Caballo de danza vana ♪

♪ Porque es muy despreciado por eso ♪

♪ No te perdona llorar ♪

♪ Ese amor llega asi esta manera ♪

♪ No tiene la culpa ♪

♪ Amor de compra y venta ♪

♪ Amor de en el pasado ♪

♪ Bem, bem bem bem, bem bem bem ♪

- ♪ Bamboléo, bamboléa ♪ - [crowd cheers]

[laughs]

♪ Porque mi vida Yo la prefiero vivir así ♪

♪ Bamboléo, bamboléa ♪

♪ Porque mi vida Yo la prefiero vivir así ♪

[out of tune] ♪ What a mouth ♪

♪ What a set of eyes ♪

♪ I swear I never saw a woman like this ♪

♪ A foxy lady ♪

♪ Uh! A hottie ♪

♪ This mouth, those eyes, oh my ♪

♪ She's the prettiest girl I ever seen ♪

Gorgeous, dance with me! Come on, dance.

- I'm watching the show. Over there. - Yeah, sure.

But look, my heart is beating so fast. My heart is fast.

[mimics heartbeat] Come on.

For you.

For you. Just for you. So let's dance. Ha!

- I'm enjoying the band. - The band, right, come on.

Enjoy this music with me. Oh, yeah.

♪ Bamboléo, bamboléa ♪

♪ Porque mi vida Yo la prefiero vivir así... ♪

Oh, yeah. That's all for you.

When I saw you, the most beautiful woman here...

- Step away, man. - Jeez, you scared me!

Oh scram, dwarf. I'm talking to this beauty right now.

- Go on. - This beauty is already here with someone.

- Say what? - Let's dance, Ivana.

How are you gonna do that? Just a sec, cutie.

They're playing Sesame Street outside, hurry along, that's more your speed.

- Come here. - [Ivana] Let's just go.

Come on, relax.

- Let's go. Come on. - Guys...

Hey, Papa Smurf?

Shorty!

Let me tell you something. Listen up, everyone.

Who let the kiddo in here anyway?

Who did that, huh? Is that even legal?

I don't know. Let me tell you something, shorty.

If you really know how to dance like you bravely suggested,

why don't you show me?

I challenge you to a dance, little man. Come on.

You and me, now, on the dance floor!

[song ends]

[warily] Let's go.

["The Macarena" plays]

♪ Are you ready? ♪

[air horn blares]

Louder! Come on, come on!

[sparse applause]

Huh?

[air horn blares]

[crowd cheers]

[laughs]

- [crowd cheers] - Whoa!

Ha!

- Huh? - Boo!

[laughing]

[tap dancing]

[Ivana] Take that!

[laughing]

[crowd cheers]

[sexy music playing]

♪ Oh, yeah, baby ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

[sighs]

♪ C'mon, baby ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

Leão?

Leão.

[moans]

Lion.

[moaning]

[Ivana yelling] Lion!

♪ I like it ♪

♪ C'mon ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Grr! ♪

♪ Grr! ♪

♪ Grr! ♪

[birds tweeting]

HOME, MY HOME IS YOURS!

[sighs]

[thud]

How can she date a guy like that?

No, he's a super-short guy,

like a really short thing, like a hobbit.

Wait, short how?

Like this?

[scoffs] No, much shorter.

- Like this? - Shorter.

Like this?

A little shorter.

Oh, my God, is he shorter than me?

- I'm telling you, he's a freak. - Hey!

Some respect please.

Otherwise I'll sue you.

[sighs]

And the joke about the Pope, a parrot and an airplane?

- I won't make you hear it now. - [laughter]

You're clueless, right? That's how I feel during mass.

Just kidding. What I really wanted to say is that I'm quite certain

that the Pope's heart is Brazilian.

SACRED HEART HOSPITAL

[cheering]

I actually have a gift here for you.

- Oh, dear. Please. - Wonderful.

[Ricardo chuckles]

Wow, that's quite a gift.

Let me see. Huh!

- Oh, yeah. - [Pope] Oh!

Oh, your Highness, let me just tell you something in confidence here.

Pelé was better than Maradona, right?

- No. Oh, no. - [Ricardo groans]

Hm, I'm a fan of Pelé

since I was a kid, but don't tell anyone.

Shh, let's call it doctor-patient confidentiality.

- But I already knew it. - [phone buzzes]

- Oops, I think my phone is ringing. - Of course.

Um, it's important, I have to...

Hello, Home?

Am I interrupting something important? Are you busy?

No, I'm not doing anything important.

- You slept well? - Very well.

Listen, would you like to come have lunch at my place?

How about tomorrow?

It's a deal.

- I'll cook. - Great!

See you then.

Kiss, kiss. Bye.

Well, I gotta run, Mr. Pope. There are big things happening,

so try to remember,

no Feast of St. John, no Easter Vigil, none of that kind of thing.

And take care of that heart, okay?

One more thing I wanted to ask you.

I'm not sure it's appropriate... One sec.

It's something personal.

Mi hija... No. Mi hija...

- La niña... - La niña.

- Tu niña. - But...

Not Nina, her name is Manu.

- Huh. - She just took her exams.

- She wants to be a doctor. - Entrance exams?

Yes, her exams for med school.

Since you happen to have an open line with the Almighty,

maybe you could talk to him 'cause she really deserves it.

Leave it to me.

I'll take care of it.

Good morning!

- Good morning, Corina. - [Danilo] Hello!

Oh, look, Miss Snow White is finally here!

For you, Snow White.

What is it?

Isn't she the one that likes the dwarfs?

Which one are you dating? Sneezy?

Or maybe Grumpy.

I know, it's Dopey. Right?

What are you saying, Danilo?

I saw you two last night leaving.

I barely saw him. I didn't have a magnifying glass.

That's my business.

[Danilo] Tell me. Why are you doing this, Ivana?

Are you trying to humiliate me, is that it?

What are people gonna say when they see you with this gnome, huh?

Are you gonna go around calling this midget your lover?

Will you introduce him to your family? Or to all your friends?

And your mom!

What's she gonna think when she sees you with this little ankle biter?

Huh?

Aren't you a little embarrassed?

Listen to me, Danilo...

No, I won't. I'm running late for a meeting.

And here you go.

Say hello to your Lilliputian friend.

[door closes]

I'll tell you where you can shove this apple.

Why didn't you tell me you had a new fling? Oh, wow!

[sighs] It all happened so suddenly, I just didn't have the time.

But Danilo is overreacting, right? About the... the...

No, well, he is short though.

He... he's short. He's small in height,

but he's a big person.

Of course, my dear.

When I'm with him,

I don't even think about his height, you know?

Of course, yeah, sure.

And you two have...

- Well, yeah. - Was it good?

It was so wow!

[laughs]

That's good!

So, it's true that... Excuse my curiosity...

- Is it? - It is for sure.

[squeals]

Wow, what a lucky girl you are!

I really admire you, you know.

You just ended the most catastrophic marriage

and quickly began a crazy, whirlwind love affair.

That's such a rare thing. I mean...

Don't mind what Danilo says.

So what if the guy is super ultra teeny tiny?

So what if everybody's gonna stare at you?

So what if everyone's gonna mock you?

So what if your mom's gonna freak out?

[laughs] What really matters is you like each other, right?

[squeals]

["At Last" playing]

Ouch!

♪ At last ♪

♪ My love has come along ♪

♪ My lonely days are over ♪

♪ And life is like a song ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ At last ♪

♪ The skies above are blue ♪

♪ My heart was wrapped up in clover ♪

♪ The night I looked at you ♪

♪ And I found a dream... ♪

[phone buzzes]

DANILO CELL

[tuts, sighs]

VOICE MESSAGE DANILO CELL

[exasperated sigh]

[Danilo] Ivana, answer me. I need to talk to you.

I want to change our arrangement.

No one showed up to share the office, so keep it.

I'm actually struggling financially and I can't afford it.

[seething] Danilo...

[voice recorder beeps]

Danilo. Listen to me carefully. I'm not gonna fall for this again.

I told you already that I don't want it.

Maybe it'll work for a while,

but I've much bigger plans for myself.

You know that it's just too small for me.

Goodbye, dear.

[gasps]

Shit!

Oh, God!

Damn it! Damn it!

[groans]

[blows]

[sighs]

[on TV] He goes for the long pass.

The linesman flags the offside.

[Ricardo] Hey. Psst!

Sir?

[footsteps approaching]

Hey.

Down here, sir.

Sir, please!

[man] Pizza delivery.

God, seriously?

- [man] Pizza delivery. - Where?

Pizza.

[strains]

Sorry, man. Need a hand, shorty?

I don't need a hand, fatty.

My bad, bro.

[elevator dings]

Excuse me.

[breathing heavily]

[puffs]

[sighs]

[puffs]

[doorbell rings]

[Ivana] Hi, Leão!

Come in.

Home?

I'm home, Home.

Just a minute!

I'm still getting dressed.

[panting]

Sh...

Calm down, dinosaur.

[Dino panting]

No, no, no!

- [yells] - [thud]

- [groaning] - [Ivana] Have you met Dino?

Leão, is everything okay?

Oh, that's a new hairstyle!

Yeah, I figured the Italian look would match the menu for today.

- Right, Dino? - [Ivana laughs]

Make yourself at home.

- Do you mind starting without me? - No.

I'm feeling right at home.

Be right back. I'll be done in a minute.

[Dino whimpers]

Well, that's high up even for her.

Hm...

- [Ivana] Everything okay? - Yeah, I think I'm up to the task.

[groans]

[strains]

[yells]

[groans]

Leão, you okay? Want some help?

No, everything's going fine in here.

Okay. I'm almost ready. Be right there.

Okay.

[grunts]

Oh, I'm sorry. Did I take long?

- You're right on time. - It smells great!

May I serve you?

Sure thing.

- Voilà. - Leão!

God, this is just marvelous!

Eat it first, praise me after.

Yeah, got it.

- Mm! - [phone rings]

Oh, God.

Mm!

Hi, Mom!

No.

No, I haven't seen any messages. My phone was drying in some rice.

I dropped it in Dino's water bowl.

- [chuckles] - Nothing much. Go ahead.

No, don't come over now.

What do you need to come for?

I have a... a guest over here.

Yeah.

No, you don't know him. You haven't met him.

Yeah.

I know the party is on Saturday.

Don't worry, I'm gonna go alone.

Okay.

Okay, Mom, can we talk about this later? I'm busy. I'll call you back.

Mom, love you. Love you, bye. Goodbye!

God.

She's so anxious about this party on Saturday.

On Saturday?

- So, you aren't having wine? - No, I'm a lightweight.

Mm!

It's my brother's party. Didn't I mention it?

No, you didn't.

Well, my brother's getting married.

My mom is throwing this little party to introduce the two families.

It's not a... It's a small reception. An intimate thing.

An intimate thing? Oh, wow.

[chuckles]

Would you...

Would you like to go with me?

I don't know. Do you want me to?

Yeah, if that's what you want.

You really don't need to invite me just to be polite.

No, I'd never do something like that.

Then I'll go.

Only if you want to, yeah?

Yeah, sure, I'll go.

So, if you don't wanna go, it's okay.

But if you do wanna go, I'd like for you to go.

I'll go.

Mm!

Mm, okay.

- [slurps] - [both chuckle]

Tell me something.

I'll go...

as what? What would you call me?

It's intimate, right? So, I'll go as what?

No, it's... [chuckles]

It's not a... You know, nothing fancy.

It's like a pool party, brunch, barbecue. It's my brother's thing.

Like a cookout, you know?

You can just dress casually.

[chuckles]

[doorbell rings]

[footsteps approach]

Hello. Is this the address for Vladimir's party?

Honey, you're terribly late!

[thumping techno music playing]

[excited chatter]

Wow, cool, Mom. This is all so beautiful!

Don't you know your brother?

Yeah, he loves this!

- It's just so beautiful. - [laughs]

Ivana, what about that guest of yours?

- I guess he's running late then. - [Márcia chuckles]

[music builds]

My God!

It's a dwarf! [gasps]

Oh, I adore dwarfs!

He's just such a cutie!

Where did they find this cute little dancing dwarf guy?

Hello, midget!

[excited squeal]

He's so cute!

[doorbell rings]

I think I got lost. Am I on time?

[techno music continues]

Hi, hello, everyone.

- How are you? - [giggles] Hi.

[Márcia] Ivana, is this man your guest?

Where did you two meet?

He is. He's the one who found my phone, Mom.

- [laughing] Ah! - I found her cell phone.

[Márcia chuckles]

He is...

He is Ricardo.

Ricardo Leão.

This is my dad, Adolfo. This is my mom.

I'm Márcia, the groom's mother.

Hi, I'm Vladimir. I'm Ivana's brother.

And this is Jeff, my soon-to-be husband.

- Hi, nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you.

These are his parents, Jacob and Sharon.

They're doctors in Alabama.

- Nice to meet you too. - Hi.

I think I know you.

I think we know him, don't we, Jacob?

Of course, my baby.

You are the cardiologist. We know all about your work.

- Oh! - [Márcia] Cardio...

What are they talking about guys?

Leão is a cardiologist, Mom.

- [gasps] - He's one of the best in the country.

One of the best in Brazil.

No, he's one of the best in the world.

What did she say?

She said that he's one of the best in the world.

I'm not so sure about the best in the world,

but I'm definitely the smallest one.

[cackling loudly]

[Ricardo chuckles]

Got a good laugh, huh?

Is he your boyfriend, Ivana?

What did he say?

What did he say, Ivana?

No, we're just friends.

[Márcia] Just friends? A friend! A friend! Just a friend.

Of course, friend.

A friend of hers.

Hey, Ivana, why don't you get a drink for Leão?

- [chuckles] Is he allowed to drink? - Yes, I can.

But not today, because I'm driving.

- [Márcia] You know how to drive? - No, just my plastic trike.

Oh, that's why you were late, huh?

- [Ricardo] It's pretty good exercise. - I'll go get you a drink.

[Márcia chuckles]

Which one is without alcohol?

Oh, I'm just so taken with you, Little Lion.

Yeah, likewise, Little Tiger.

[forced laughter]

Oh, I'm just so happy that Ivana has found a new little buddy.

[Márcia sighs]

You could help me out. I'm convincing her to get back with Danilo.

They love each other so much.

Can you believe they got married after dating for only a month?

Just like me and Adolfo.

They're soul mates.

She doesn't even notice it, but she's always talking about that guy,

which must mean she is still in love with him, right?

- Right, sure, sure. Yes. - [Márcia] Hey!

- Leão? - Hey.

What do they call you in English?

"Anal."

[chuckles awkwardly]

[Ivana] Your drink.

Thank you.

[laughs politely]

Dad, I have to talk to you.

The article is great, but they missed my height again.

- Oh. - What's up?

- I did it. Uh-huh! - You did it? [gasps]

And this is how you tell me, honey? Get over here!

Hey! I'm so happy!

- I was so sure you'd get it. - Yeah, but...

I'm so proud of you.

I always knew you'd get it.

But now I'm so proud. You did it, like a boss.

- I'm so happy for you! - So, about that, I...

I don't want to steer you in any direction,

but you'd make a great cardiologist.

Just saying, huh? [laughs]

- Uh, yeah, so I have... - Just a sec.

Hello?

- Dad? - Pope? Pope?

I'm talking to the Pope. I think I should thank him.

Pope! Soy yo.

Leão, the one who did the operation.

Listen, Pope, is everything all right? Are they treating you well?

I'm just calling to say thank you because my daughter passed her exam.

Oh! Je suis trés feliz.

[Ivana] God, Mom, why did you pick this route?

We're gonna end up being late. I'm telling you.

Here you go. Follow the GPS.

[female voice] In a quarter mile, keep left.

[Márcia] What is that voicethere?

At the roundabout, turn right.

Well, the GPS is suggesting the very worst route.

This wedding dessert had better be the most delicious dessert in the world.

[mutters] For Christ's sake.

Ah, you know, speaking of which,

have you decided who's going with you to the ceremony?

I haven't decided yet. I'm still thinking.

Are you seeing someone

and didn't bother to tell me about it by any chance?

I wanna know who it is. Do I know him?

Well, yes.

Mm, well, who is he?

It's Ricardo.

Ricardo? Who's this Ricardo?

[sighs] It's Ricardo Leão, you met him at the brunch.

Well, I met a lot of people at the party.

Leão the cardiologist.

Oh, the cardio...

Huh?

- Oh, no! - [tires screech]

- [horns honk] - Mom!

- For God's sake! - For my sake!

What are you thinking?

Are you trying to kill me with disappointment?

You're the one who's gonna kill us by driving like a psycho!

Oh, Ivana.

There are a lot of normal guys out there. Do you really have to date a...

a him?

Normal?

[angrily] Normal?

Stop being so goddamn prejudiced.

Me? How am I prejudiced?

[tires screech]

You're being prejudiced!

I'm an extremely open-minded woman.

I'm modern.

Your brother is gay and I accept it.

His boyfriend is a foreigner and I accept it.

Your dad is a vegan and I accept it.

Tell me then, how am I "prejudiced"?

Do you even hear yourself when you talk?

What are you...

That's it.

I've had enough of this.

- Ivana. - Screw the stupid dessert!

Ivana, come back here! I'm talking to you for God's sake!

- Ivana! - [GPS] Careful. Inappropriate move.

You forgot your phone. Come back here!

- [Ivana] Morning, Corina. - Good morning.

Is Danilo here?

[Danilo] Ivana?

Is... is that Ivana, Corina?

Hey, Iva...

Or is that Madonna here to adopt another child?

[hums "Like a Virgin"]

Yeah, I'm Madonna. I'm Madonna.

Cut it out. Listen, I'm not in the mood for your nonsense.

Sure, I'll tone it down.

♪ Oh, the very first time ♪

So then, Madonna, are you keeping the office then?

Are you deaf or what?

Didn't you hear me saying that I don't want the office?

It's too damn little.

It reminds me of you, it's suffocating.

Oh, so big men tend to suffocate you, huh?

- [chuckles] - [laughs mockingly]

I'm done. I'm done. I'd rather just work from home, Corina.

Just so you know,

Leão is a much bigger man than you'll ever be.

In every way.

[splutters] In every...

What do you mean bigger?

Hey, listen to me.

Pew!

What... What are you trying to say?

- A small pond can hold enormous fish. - Go to hell!

I... I don't remember exactly...

Talk to the hand 'cause I'm not listening!

[knocking]

Excuse me... [chuckles]

Hello. Is this the law office of Miss Ivana?

Hi!

You must be the famous Leão.

I was dying to meet you.

I imagined you'd be a lot shorter.

Maybe it's your glasses.

[both chuckle]

How sweet.

[laughs]

- Hey. And Miss Ivana? - Hi.

Uh, she just walked out.

I'll call her and let her know you're here.

One moment, please.

Oh!

- No need for that. - Excuse me.

Fine.

[ringing tone]

[whispers] Make yourself at home.

[female voice] The person you have reached is unavailable.

I'm getting her voicemail.

- She's not great with phones, huh? - Shocker.

[keypad beeps]

Did you have a date or were you here for...

No. My daughter got the results of her exams

and I'd like to invite Ivana to our celebration.

[footsteps approach]

Ivana has lost it!

She's completely crazy!

I'm certain that mini-man has burrowed his way into her head.

What the hell?

She must be so dumb to fall for just anybody.

She must be so incredibly desperate to stoop that low.

[sighs]

[exhales]

If I ever run into that tiny nightmare, I swear to God, I'll...

Do what?

Oh!

I'm sorry, I didn't know you had half of a guest here.

Danilo, this is Leão. Your wife's boyfriend.

Leão this is Danilo. Your girlfriend's husband.

Uh, I mean...

[sighs] Let me see if I can catch her. Excuse me for a sec.

- You were saying what? - Well...

I was just saying that Ivana is far out of your league, little guy.

Look at you.

If you can even reach a mirror, that is... [laughs]

[chuckling]

[grunting]

[Ricardo] Whoa!

[panting]

[groans]

[fabric rips]

Dear God! What on earth is going on?

[gasps] Shame on you, Leão!

why don't you pick a fight with someone your own size!

I'm not done yet, you bastard.

[Danilo] Ivana has been lying to you.

And they say lies have short legs.

[chuckles] Listen to this.

[Ivana] Danilo. Listen to me carefully. I'm not gonna fall for this again.

I told you already that I don't want it.

Maybe it'll work for a while,

but I've much bigger plans for myself.

- It's just too small for me. - You're done, Playmobil.

[gasps] Poor thing, it must be hard enough to be born like that.

Whoa! [yells]

Hey, shorty, it's you again.

- [groans] - My bad. Need a hand?

I don't need a hand, you fatty!

A man of your size should be more careful, okay?

Sorry, dude, didn't see you.

That's the thing. People never see me. No one ever sees me.

I'm just fine on my own.

Fine on my own as always.

Cláudia, you know Dad, he doesn't listen to me.

Oh, my darling, he's gonna listen to you.

- You're so happy now. - Yeah, that's true.

[door opens]

Oh, well, look who's here. Your dad.

[Cláudia] Leão, what happened?

No, this is nothing. It's not important.

My future physician is the most important, and we must celebrate.

So, Dad, listen. I need to talk to you about something.

Sure, sweetie.

It's just I'm not going to the college you expected me too.

You scared me. Who cares?

You ought to know by now.

- The calling matters more than the school. - Veterinary school.

Veterinary... What?

A veterinarian.

That's always been my dream job.

- I really love animals. - You'll treat animals?

Animals are like people.

- [doorbell rings] - Just give us a second here.

Why did you lie to me?

I didn't lie, Dad, I just didn't tell you.

You know how I hate being lied to, Manu. I detest it!

First, it's Ivana who betrays me, now you, of all people?

You aren't listening to me, Dad.

And you listen to animals, right? That's why you'll treat them?

Because you know how to listen?

[Ivana] Hello!

Here's some chocolates for the future cardiologist.

Come with me.

It has a cherry filling.

What's wrong?

Corina told me that you came by the office.

Well, uh, this isn't working out, okay?

What? What's that?

Us.

We'd better stop things here.

What do you mean, Leão?

I don't understand what you're saying.

I wouldn't want to get in the way of your bigger plans.

Are you...

Are you breaking up with me, Leão?

I don't want to be with someone who's ashamed of me, Ivana.

No, that's not true.

Listen, I...

This is complicated for me, you know.

I...

I don't always know how to behave. I'm still learning.

I'm not perfect, I...

You might think I am, but I'm just not.

- I also have my flaws. - You...

Don't take this the wrong way, but I'd like for you to leave.

You want me to leave?

It's my daughter's party.

So could you please go?

[melancholic music playing]

♪ I gave you my love for one day ♪

♪ And then, by accident I lost you ♪

♪ I didn't think love existed ♪

♪ That I would cry for you too ♪

♪ But everything shall pass Everything will pass ♪

[sobbing]

♪ And nothing remains Nothing will remain ♪

[sobbing]

♪ Happiness can only be found ♪

♪ When you surrender... ♪

Thank you.

[blows nose]

[sobbing]

[blows nose]

[sobs]

[sobbing]

♪ I will want it again someday ♪

♪ Today, I know I won't cry anymore ♪

♪ If there is no more joy in me ♪

[thud]

♪ Hope... ♪

[Ricardo sobbing] Why? Oh, why?

♪ Will teach me how to scream ♪

♪ Everything passes Everything will pass ♪

TO MR. LEÃO

THE FAMILY OF THE GROOM INVITES MR. LEÃO

TO THE WEDDING CEREMONY OF VLAD AND JEFF

♪ Happiness can only be found ♪

♪ When you surrender your heart ♪

Dad, look what I found in the fireplace.

You should've left it alone.

I can't believe you're not going.

Didn't you hear what Ivana said?

Did you? You usually hear what you want.

Why don't you give her a chance? Stop being so proud.

- I'm not proud. - Yeah, right.

I'm very proud of my lack of pride, okay?

Who are you to talk to me like that?

You've been lying to me forever.

You wouldn't have listened anyway.

I was always being honest with myself. You're the one who's lying.

Listen...

You always told me your height wasn't a problem for you.

I always believed you.

But you were lying to me. Just look at you now.

Of course it's a problem.

Do you think it was easy to see everyone around me growing up

and not me?

I always had to work at least ten times harder than everyone else.

[sighs] And what was it for? Nothing.

I'm always gonna be the dwarf.

Then stop being vain pretending like it isn't a problem for you.

Do you think it's easy for Ivana?

If you want her to accept you, accept yourself first.

Look, Dad,

even if you were one or two feet taller,

it wouldn't change anything about who you are.

Manu, wait.

You're going to be a great veterinarian.

[chuckles]

[sobbing]

[wails] You already know how to take care of lions!

[Manu laughs]

Mm-hm.

Groom's guests, this way. You two, over here.

The other groom, that way.

You can be here now.

My God, my God!

[grunts]

Damn!

Guys, where's the justice?

[guests laughing]

Oh! [grunts]

Oh, goddammit.

Uh...

- Danilo. - Hi.

Who invited you, Danilo?

Uh, your mom practically told me to come.

Wow, you, uh...

You're beautiful.

You know, Ivana, us getting a divorce was a terrible decision. You know that?

The clients love you, Corina loves you.

Dino loves you, I...

I'm bankrupt now. I...

Wouldn't it be better financially if we stuck together?

So, just think that over.

I'll get you some white wine. I got you!

[laughs]

I hate white wine.

[exhales] He's the groom's guest, right?

[exclaims]

[grunts] Come here, doggy.

I don't get paid enough for this.

Keep going, hun. I know you can do it.

[sternly] Mom!

Justice of the Peace, take this dog and go to your mark.

It's about to start. I hate dogs, I hate weddings.

What the hell am I even doing here?

Hi, guys.

Mom, why on earth did you invite Danilo?

Well, when I heard those things you said about Leão,

I simply thought...

What did I say about Leão?

I heard everything after that fistfight.

- You heard... - Fistfight? What fight?

The fight at the office. You didn't tell her about it, Danilo?

I told your dad, and I told Jeff,

and I told Vlad, I told Sharon,

and I also told Jacob, I told everyone.

Wh... What fight? What happened?

Well, it wasn't really a fight.

No, yeah, he really kicked your ass.

It was kind of biblical, David versus Goliath.

And the little guy only stopped when Danilo

finally told him you'd been lying to him.

Me? You... What the hell did you tell Leão?

It was that voice message where you said you didn't want him,

you had bigger plans, and he was too little for you.

What an ugly thing to say, Ivana.

My God, I was just talking... I was talking about the office.

It wasn't about Leão. You did... You are...

How can you be such a moron?

You're not just a moron, you're also a bad person.

Ivana, this is my wedding. What the hell?

Can you please control your behavior?

Hang on, you know how she likes to go low.

- [gasps] - [groans]

What is going on here?

Get out of here. Get him out of here!

Washing dirty laundry, you know?

Was that really necessary? Such a pretty nose.

And you need to stop butting into my personal life.

- This is your fault! All of this. - Mine?

I just want what's best for you, that's all.

Aren't you able to see that? Do you see that, Adolfo?

- Well... - Just listen to your father. Yeah.

See, Jeff, you'd better get used to it.

You'll soon find out that, Ivana, she's always arguing with me.

What a family!

Did you hear that? You need to think about your family.

- Jesus! - And about Jesus also!

I want what's best for you because Danilo...

[shouts] Enough, Márcia!

Stop it! You're wrong. You're completely wrong!

You're absolutely wrong. You've been talking nonstop for 40 years.

It's as though you swallowed a radio.

She can choose whomever she wants to be with.

She doesn't even like Danilo. Don't you realize that?

She's in love with the cute little guy.

[Adolfo sighs]

My dear, no one else should try to tell you what true love is.

If you must listen to anyone, or anything,

listen to your heart.

[yells in pain]

[wedding planner] Oh, my God!

- Dad? - [Márcia] Oh, my God!

[Vladimir] Call a doctor!

- [Márcia] Call Dr. Leão! - [Ivana] Dad, talk to me!

Another wedding death, seriously? For real?

- My God. - I want Dr. Leão!

I'm talking to you! Wake up, girl. I want Dr. Leão!

Excuse me, Dr. Leão isn't here yet.

[Ricardo] Hi. Excuse me, man. Is the wedding over?

The wedding didn't even start.

The groom's dad fell ill.

They all went to the hospital.

To the hospital? But... But which hospital?

The hospital. I don't know, they went after the Lion King.

- Dr. Lion. - [chuckles] Yes.

Dr. Leão, that's me.

God!

[taps phone keypad]

[phone buzzes]

Ivana?

[guest] She's out, can I help?

Hey, that phone is Ivana's.

- Give it. Give it, please. - Sure.

Big guy.

[crash]

[air hissing]

Oh, you gotta be kidding me. Wow!

Ow!

[groaning]

[stifled scream]

[sighs]

A fucking garden gnome... [groans]

Delivery for Vladimir and Jeff. Is this the place?

That's all I need right now. Are you following me, fatty?

No, man, I've got things to do.

Hey, so is everything okay, shorty?

I'm doing just great!

[scoffs] Got a flat tire, and I have to go to the hospital,

everything's just dandy!

Could you help me?

Say what?

- Do you think you could help me out? - Speak louder.

Help me.

I need a hand. Could you please help me?

Oh, you need help!

I thought you'd never ask me.

Hop on, shorty. I'll take you right there.

- Let's go. - Thank you.

Hey. Psst!

Now we're a little more familiar, please stop calling me "shorty."

It's not cool.

Yeah, well, you call me "fatty." And you're really short.

We are what we are, bro.

We are what we are.

- [Márcia] Oh, sweetie! - It's gonna be okay. Easy, slow.

Just breathe.

- Breathe, darling, don't speak. - Let him speak. How do you feel, Dad?

- Don't speak! - [Cláudia] Poor guy.

- Hey! Get your hands off him! - God, stop it, Mom!

I need his blood pressure.

I want Dr. Leão! Get your grubby hands...

- I told you. Dr. Leão isn't here. - The lion escaped.

Your husband needs care immediately!

Hi, Leão, thank God you're here.

Come, come.

Oh, Leão, I think he's having a heart attack.

Calm down. I'm gonna check.

Adolfo, how do you feel?

Uh, Doctor, I...

No talking. This all happened because you spoke.

I'm feeling better. There's no need to stop the wedding.

You heard the man. I do charge by the hour.

[Márcia] Dr. Leão,

while I know black makes me look slimmer, I'm just not ready to become a widow.

Shh, shh. I must ask you to keep quiet.

Stay quiet for just a bit, so I can check him out, okay?

- I have to pay attention. - [giggles]

- [Ricardo] Okay. - Shh.

Uh... [clears throat]

Unfortunately,

Mr. Adolfo is suffering from an extreme case

of CO2 accumulation

between his diaphragm and his abdominal region.

[Corina] Oh...

What is that?

- Gas. - [Adolfo] Oh!

[laughing]

[Ricardo] It's just gas.

[all laughing]

[Ricardo] It's gas.

- You're so silly. - [Ricardo] It's gas.

- Why did you say "unfortunately"? - Just give it a second...

- [flatulence] - There.

I did warn you about that fried codfish.

- Dad! - Oh, Dad!

[Márcia groans]

Ivana, I really need to talk to you.

Yeah, me too. I really want to talk to you.

I found your phone.

[planner] So the wedding is happening?

No wedding, no payment.

No wedding, no payment, right?

I know I ended things abruptly and I...

Her, she's an attorney.

You.

- Aren't you an attorney? Come with me. - Me?

- No, I... - Come and help me right now.

[planner] This wedding is happening. I'll call the Pope if I have to.

["Bridal Chorus" by Wagner playing]

[woman sobbing]

[Ivana chuckles]

[wedding planner] All right.

Oh, my God.

How am I gonna do this?

[laughs]

This is crazy!

Okay.

I'm so very happy for you. Really!

I pronounce you

husband and husband.

You may now kiss one another.

Say a little more!

Play the role.

More?

Um...

What else should I say?

Talk about love, darling.

No, I don't know how to...

Yes. Yes, you do.

Love...

Love...

...is...

...is...

[sighs]

I'm just incredibly proud of you, my baby brother.

So proud of you.

You have always taken responsibility for your choices, and I...

I wanted to be like that.

I wish I could be just like you.

But that's very hard to do.

It's hard to stop caring about the opinions of other people.

- In that sense, I'm very stupid. - [Corina] Stupid.

She's very stupid.

[laughs] Stupid. Yeah.

Very stupid.

[chuckles]

If I could go back in time, I would tell someone my feelings.

But I think it's too late to tell them now.

Anyway, now...

Say it to him!

Say it to him!

- Tell him? - Yeah.

Leão?

Leão.

I never said you were too small for me.

I was just talking about the office.

He is a lion, not an office.

You're, without a doubt, the greatest man I've ever known.

You're so special to me.

And I feel good when I'm with you.

Whenever I'm with you, I can't think about anything else.

It's like my head is spinning.

My whole body starts shivering.

It's like the world had stopped around us,

like there's only us two.

Yeah.

Ivana loves lions.

But we're in the middle of a ceremony right now, so...

[laughter]

- What should I say now? - If anyone opposes...

- Yes. - Ha-ha!

If there's anyone in attendance who opposes this beautiful wedding,

please speak now or forever hold your peace.

Me.

What?

No, no, I don't oppose anyone.

I don't oppose anything. You all look great in here... [laughs]

This whole ceremony is so beautiful.

I don't think this hospital has ever looked this pretty.

[Ricardo chuckles]

I... I'll speak very briefly.

Very briefly.

Thank you... [clears throat]

Well...

Uh...

Can you help me?

[Ricardo] Uh...

I've always had to work extra hard to get what I wanted in life.

Maybe that's the reason I'm a bit proud, you know?

I never could allow other people to say or do things on my behalf.

I really believed that I was capable

of doing it all myself.

I also thought I knew everything there was to know about hearts,

but then when you appeared,

in my life,

you taught me how my own heart works.

So then, if you'll accept me,

if you'll dive into this adventure with me,

I can promise you that this time,

I won't let you go.

[congregation] Aw!

What did he say?

Oh, he's just being sentimental. Wasn't it beautiful?

[slow clapping]

He's a very small guy, but those were very big words.

[congregation cheering]

["Bamboléo" by the Gypsy Kings playing]

[kissing noises]

[singing in Spanish]

[panting]

[clattering]

[kisses]

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