All language subtitles for Fleabag - 02x05 - Episode 5.WEBRip-KOMPOST

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,880 --> 00:00:06,500 I think there's something rather chic about having 2 00:00:06,525 --> 00:00:09,799 - a real priest at a wedding. - Why is everyone talking to each other? 3 00:00:09,800 --> 00:00:11,159 Oh, it's Chatty Wednesday. 4 00:00:11,160 --> 00:00:12,439 Hi, Jake. Oh! 5 00:00:12,440 --> 00:00:15,039 Tell her to leave him. 6 00:00:15,040 --> 00:00:16,880 We are trying for a baby. 7 00:00:18,991 --> 00:00:20,288 This the little troublemaker, then? 8 00:00:20,351 --> 00:00:22,319 He says he'll only talk you through potential proceedings, 9 00:00:22,344 --> 00:00:24,218 - if you go for a drink with him. - Claire! 10 00:00:24,243 --> 00:00:26,439 Oh! Hi. Oh! 11 00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:27,567 So, how do you two know each other? 12 00:00:27,622 --> 00:00:29,759 Oh, we are partners. 13 00:00:29,760 --> 00:00:31,536 Are you in love with him? 14 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:39,944 I spent most of my adult life using sex to deflect 15 00:00:39,969 --> 00:00:41,579 from the screaming void inside my empty heart. 16 00:00:42,986 --> 00:00:44,227 - Don't sleep with him. - I won't. 17 00:00:44,252 --> 00:00:45,430 - Don't. - I won't! 18 00:00:45,455 --> 00:00:46,720 I don't do that any more. 19 00:00:51,264 --> 00:00:53,319 I thought I wouldn't see you again unless you were in trouble. 20 00:00:53,389 --> 00:00:55,085 Oh! I am in trouble! 21 00:00:55,131 --> 00:00:56,822 Ohh! You mean this kind of trouble. 22 00:00:58,048 --> 00:00:59,188 Isn't he great? 23 00:00:59,213 --> 00:01:02,351 He's so great. He's funny, he makes jokes. 24 00:01:02,376 --> 00:01:03,679 She turned around and it was the golden one! 25 00:01:04,640 --> 00:01:06,519 You, sort of, needed to hear the top bit. 26 00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:08,552 - I love word play. - Oh, he's clever. 27 00:01:08,577 --> 00:01:09,687 Shakespeare uses word play. 28 00:01:09,726 --> 00:01:12,159 - He says things like... - I've got a big case tomorrow. 29 00:01:12,160 --> 00:01:13,796 He's a little bit controlling. 30 00:01:13,821 --> 00:01:15,079 - Don't eat that. - But it's manageable. 31 00:01:15,104 --> 00:01:16,126 - I'm going to. - Okay. 32 00:01:16,151 --> 00:01:17,765 - He's a feminist. - I have a sister. 33 00:01:17,790 --> 00:01:20,041 - He's unpredictable. - I'm just going to go for a shit. 34 00:01:20,118 --> 00:01:21,875 I'm ignoring that. 35 00:01:21,923 --> 00:01:23,454 Actually... 36 00:01:23,479 --> 00:01:24,501 ...you want to go and have sex? 37 00:01:24,526 --> 00:01:26,479 - That's better. - I'm really good at it. 38 00:01:26,480 --> 00:01:28,239 - He won't be. - I'm really good at it. 39 00:01:28,240 --> 00:01:29,479 He won't be. 40 00:01:29,480 --> 00:01:30,571 He's really good at it. 41 00:01:30,634 --> 00:01:32,600 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com 42 00:01:33,040 --> 00:01:34,749 Oh, my God. 43 00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:42,542 I'm not going to be sick. 44 00:01:43,252 --> 00:01:45,092 I'm not going to be sick. 45 00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:48,902 Hi. 46 00:01:48,995 --> 00:01:50,472 Hi. 47 00:01:50,558 --> 00:01:52,855 - Do you need a hand with any of...? - No, no. 48 00:01:52,917 --> 00:01:55,915 - I can at least take the bassoon if you... - No, I am perfectly balanced. 49 00:01:55,939 --> 00:01:57,508 Thank you. 50 00:01:57,610 --> 00:02:00,023 - Big night, last night? - Is it obvious? 51 00:02:00,077 --> 00:02:02,179 Well, at least someone's having fun. 52 00:02:02,821 --> 00:02:04,300 Wait, I can get the... 53 00:02:04,359 --> 00:02:05,438 - No, no... I got it! - ...bell. 54 00:02:05,489 --> 00:02:07,149 Okay. 55 00:02:11,720 --> 00:02:14,152 - Are you going to be sick? - Nope. 56 00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:15,999 She'd better be quick today. 57 00:02:16,040 --> 00:02:18,191 I've got a serious appointment later, I can't miss it. 58 00:02:18,245 --> 00:02:20,386 - It's very important. - What kind of appointment? 59 00:02:20,440 --> 00:02:21,887 A serious one. 60 00:02:21,920 --> 00:02:23,119 I can't miss it, okay? 61 00:02:23,145 --> 00:02:25,231 - Do you need me to...? - I don't need you... 62 00:02:25,283 --> 00:02:27,483 ...to do anything, thank you. 63 00:02:28,560 --> 00:02:31,356 Unless you can find a way to stop this horrendous wedding 64 00:02:31,397 --> 00:02:32,413 from happening. 65 00:02:32,468 --> 00:02:33,632 - Girls! - Hi! 66 00:02:33,694 --> 00:02:35,272 Come in! Come in. 67 00:02:35,311 --> 00:02:36,710 Oh, look at you. 68 00:02:36,788 --> 00:02:38,696 Just leave these things there for now, yeah. 69 00:02:38,751 --> 00:02:40,587 You like a quick cup of tea before you start? 70 00:02:40,634 --> 00:02:42,852 - It's already in the pot. - I have to be pretty quick today. 71 00:02:42,931 --> 00:02:44,634 - Water or some gin would be lovely. - Come through. We have a tray of 72 00:02:44,688 --> 00:02:46,556 lovely, sweet, chocolaty things 73 00:02:46,610 --> 00:02:48,967 and our lovely friend has just dropped round. 74 00:02:49,037 --> 00:02:51,154 - Hi. - Hello, darling. 75 00:02:51,920 --> 00:02:53,100 Hello. 76 00:02:53,170 --> 00:02:55,039 Oh, I'm going to be sick. 77 00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:56,726 You all right? You look horrendous. 78 00:02:56,760 --> 00:02:59,062 Oh, thanks. Just a big night. 79 00:02:59,593 --> 00:03:01,327 - Hello. - Hey! 80 00:03:01,406 --> 00:03:03,265 I only meant to be quick, I wasn't... Didn't need to... 81 00:03:03,335 --> 00:03:04,879 Wasn't expecting the whole family, wow! 82 00:03:04,921 --> 00:03:07,028 They're being painted. Isn't that fun? 83 00:03:07,098 --> 00:03:09,359 So fun! Um, I can come back later? 84 00:03:09,395 --> 00:03:11,679 - No, no! - No! No. 85 00:03:11,739 --> 00:03:13,317 So, come on, fill us in. 86 00:03:13,363 --> 00:03:15,637 Probably better, actually, that we should all hear the plans. 87 00:03:15,669 --> 00:03:16,645 All right. 88 00:03:16,676 --> 00:03:20,598 Right, well, I just wanted to pop in, actually, to say that, um... 89 00:03:20,997 --> 00:03:22,962 ...I've been called away this weekend 90 00:03:23,025 --> 00:03:27,095 and I'm afraid I won't be able to officiate at the ceremony tomorrow. 91 00:03:32,240 --> 00:03:34,808 Oh, Christ. 92 00:03:34,872 --> 00:03:36,214 Why? 93 00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:38,706 My brother is ill. 94 00:03:38,785 --> 00:03:40,808 So, I have to go and see him. 95 00:03:41,511 --> 00:03:43,471 Wh-what's he ill with? 96 00:03:43,990 --> 00:03:45,470 A lorry... 97 00:03:47,366 --> 00:03:48,685 ...accident. 98 00:03:48,772 --> 00:03:49,885 Right. 99 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:51,783 Oh, God. 100 00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:53,879 - Is he all right? - He's-he's... 101 00:03:53,957 --> 00:03:57,613 He's in a bit of a state, to be honest. 102 00:03:57,934 --> 00:03:59,650 But, uh... 103 00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:02,666 ...I just can't do it. 104 00:04:03,560 --> 00:04:05,517 I can't do it. 105 00:04:06,111 --> 00:04:08,123 Well. 106 00:04:08,366 --> 00:04:09,943 Well. 107 00:04:12,315 --> 00:04:14,586 Oh, this is going to be spectacular. 108 00:04:15,843 --> 00:04:17,249 You... 109 00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:19,578 ...poor man. 110 00:04:19,644 --> 00:04:21,269 Well, of course, you must go. 111 00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:23,119 Really? 112 00:04:23,167 --> 00:04:25,144 - Really? - Of course! 113 00:04:25,199 --> 00:04:28,376 Family first! Always family first. 114 00:04:28,455 --> 00:04:30,423 You must go! Get straight to him. 115 00:04:30,478 --> 00:04:32,892 Just send me through the details of what you've worked out so far 116 00:04:32,917 --> 00:04:33,929 and we'll sort something out. 117 00:04:33,954 --> 00:04:35,775 Well, I've put out the feelers for somebody else and... 118 00:04:35,814 --> 00:04:37,919 Well, uh, I think we might have to... 119 00:04:37,957 --> 00:04:40,051 Don't even think about it, this is much more important. 120 00:04:40,121 --> 00:04:41,488 You must go! Go, go, go! 121 00:04:41,551 --> 00:04:44,095 Okay, well... well, thank you so much for your understanding. 122 00:04:44,166 --> 00:04:45,994 Yeah, well, sure, sure, sure. 123 00:04:47,298 --> 00:04:48,923 All the best and I'll see you again. 124 00:04:48,994 --> 00:04:50,759 - I'm sorry. Have a great day! - Oh, goodbye, darling. 125 00:04:50,814 --> 00:04:52,024 - Good luck! - Bye-bye. Bye-bye. 126 00:04:53,720 --> 00:04:56,319 What a... 127 00:04:56,741 --> 00:04:58,020 ...cunt! 128 00:04:58,082 --> 00:04:59,457 - What a cunt! - No, no... 129 00:04:59,512 --> 00:05:00,789 - Bastard! Fucking bastard! - Please, don't react like this. 130 00:05:00,813 --> 00:05:02,133 - There's no need to talk like this. - Don't touch me! 131 00:05:02,173 --> 00:05:03,609 Christ, I need to paint. I need to paint, now! 132 00:05:03,656 --> 00:05:05,445 Send them away! 133 00:05:09,080 --> 00:05:11,543 - I think you should, uh... - Yes, okay. 134 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:13,707 Bye, Dad. 135 00:05:13,820 --> 00:05:15,340 Bye, Dad. 136 00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:22,442 Well, that solves that problem. 137 00:05:22,520 --> 00:05:24,427 Well, I'm relieved for him. 138 00:05:24,473 --> 00:05:25,752 You all right? 139 00:05:25,800 --> 00:05:28,074 Yeah, just late for the cafe. 140 00:05:28,480 --> 00:05:29,738 Right. 141 00:05:44,525 --> 00:05:45,799 - Whoa! Sorry. - Oh, my God! 142 00:05:45,824 --> 00:05:46,836 Sorry, sorry, sorry. 143 00:05:46,861 --> 00:05:48,557 Jesus! How long were you there? 144 00:05:48,593 --> 00:05:50,768 Literally three seconds. 145 00:05:53,376 --> 00:05:55,127 - You can't just cancel a wedding. - I don't have a choice. 146 00:05:55,190 --> 00:05:56,932 But you have the dress. 147 00:05:59,639 --> 00:06:00,936 I can't, I can't, I can't... 148 00:06:00,960 --> 00:06:02,927 - Listen, I just need to say... - No, no, no! I know what... 149 00:06:02,952 --> 00:06:05,084 - I don't want to know! - I don't think you know what I'm gonna say! 150 00:06:17,120 --> 00:06:19,160 Please don't come to the church again. 151 00:06:23,420 --> 00:06:25,166 I mean that... 152 00:06:26,351 --> 00:06:28,253 ...with the greatest of compliments. 153 00:06:45,669 --> 00:06:48,646 I'd strongly advise taking out insurance. 154 00:06:48,701 --> 00:06:50,529 - The problem is... - I can deal with it. 155 00:06:50,591 --> 00:06:52,924 - ...the young, uh, seven-foot-tall, - I can deal with it. 156 00:06:52,979 --> 00:06:54,877 a very large armchair. 157 00:06:54,923 --> 00:06:56,414 - So he didn't even feel... - I can't deal with it. 158 00:06:56,455 --> 00:06:59,501 ...the chinchilla, you know, suffocating underneath him. 159 00:06:59,565 --> 00:07:01,313 It's Tuesday, Joe. 160 00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:03,786 No, it's Chatty Wednesday. 161 00:07:03,825 --> 00:07:05,200 No, it's Quiet Tuesday. 162 00:07:05,247 --> 00:07:06,426 It's Chatty Wednesday. 163 00:07:06,480 --> 00:07:07,926 Well, it was a very small chinchilla... 164 00:07:07,989 --> 00:07:11,388 No, can we just stop chatting, just for a second please, Joe?! 165 00:07:12,772 --> 00:07:14,292 Joe, I... 166 00:07:20,696 --> 00:07:21,913 Hi. 167 00:07:22,280 --> 00:07:23,793 You okay? 168 00:07:23,848 --> 00:07:25,293 Uh, yeah. Are you okay? 169 00:07:25,317 --> 00:07:26,606 You look like something bad's happened. 170 00:07:26,661 --> 00:07:27,973 Do I? 171 00:07:27,997 --> 00:07:29,317 I thought I was looking jolly. 172 00:07:29,403 --> 00:07:31,695 Oh! Um, why? 173 00:07:31,720 --> 00:07:33,239 I've been offered a new job. 174 00:07:33,285 --> 00:07:34,550 Oh. 175 00:07:34,605 --> 00:07:35,839 Congratulations. 176 00:07:35,878 --> 00:07:39,425 But I just wanted to say goodbye... 177 00:07:39,675 --> 00:07:42,039 ...and to give you this. 178 00:07:42,040 --> 00:07:43,420 Thanks. 179 00:07:45,040 --> 00:07:46,138 It's a guinea pig. 180 00:07:46,224 --> 00:07:47,771 It's a hamster. 181 00:07:47,834 --> 00:07:48,920 Thanks. 182 00:07:52,102 --> 00:07:53,313 Oh, sorry, it's my sister. 183 00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:54,899 She's a bit mental, do you mind if I...? 184 00:07:54,936 --> 00:07:56,735 Sure, I wasn't going to stay so... 185 00:07:56,760 --> 00:07:58,133 - Claire? - Something's happened! 186 00:07:58,187 --> 00:08:00,241 Something awful has happened! 187 00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:02,316 - What?! - I can't... 188 00:08:02,370 --> 00:08:04,448 - Where are you? You need me to come? - I can't breathe! 189 00:08:04,527 --> 00:08:06,279 No, no, I just, I fucked it up. 190 00:08:06,347 --> 00:08:08,989 I fucked everything up! Can you come? 191 00:08:09,028 --> 00:08:11,015 I mean, I-I have to close the cafe. But I can... 192 00:08:11,040 --> 00:08:12,842 - Just tell me where you are. - No, don't close. 193 00:08:12,897 --> 00:08:16,131 - I'm so sorry, but, but no... - I can look after the place, if you like? 194 00:08:16,202 --> 00:08:18,095 - Really? - Well, I don't start till Monday. 195 00:08:18,160 --> 00:08:19,165 But why...? 196 00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:22,071 - I just like it. - Oh, okay. 197 00:08:22,134 --> 00:08:24,359 - Are you talking to me? - Could you give Hillary and, um... 198 00:08:24,406 --> 00:08:26,076 - No, don't bring Hillary. - Stephanie. 199 00:08:26,101 --> 00:08:28,413 Stephanie, some cucumber at 2:30? 200 00:08:28,452 --> 00:08:29,951 - Who's Stephanie? - Yeah. Thanks. 201 00:08:29,976 --> 00:08:31,717 Um, Claire, just tell me where you are? 202 00:08:31,760 --> 00:08:33,935 - What the hell has happened? - No, just come! I need you to... 203 00:08:39,040 --> 00:08:40,839 - Tell the truth. - It's horrendous. 204 00:08:40,902 --> 00:08:42,426 - It's horrendous. - It's modern. 205 00:08:42,481 --> 00:08:44,356 - Don't lie! - I'm not! 206 00:08:44,402 --> 00:08:45,989 I look like a pencil. 207 00:08:46,036 --> 00:08:47,339 You... 208 00:08:47,364 --> 00:08:49,302 - You don't look like a... - Don't laugh! 209 00:08:49,333 --> 00:08:51,593 - It's okay! - It's not okay, 210 00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:54,257 - I'm going to lose my job. - You won't lose your job, it's cool. 211 00:08:54,320 --> 00:08:56,196 - It's not cool! - It's edgy. 212 00:08:56,221 --> 00:08:57,220 Oh, fuck off! 213 00:08:57,245 --> 00:08:58,932 - No, it's chic. - It's unsalvageable! 214 00:08:58,979 --> 00:09:00,299 Claire, it's French! 215 00:09:02,360 --> 00:09:04,445 - Really? - Yes. 216 00:09:07,664 --> 00:09:09,328 You been drinking? 217 00:09:09,400 --> 00:09:12,824 Oh, he gave me champagne before he ruined my life. 218 00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:15,394 That's how they get you. 219 00:09:15,456 --> 00:09:17,441 Did you go to Anthony? 220 00:09:17,976 --> 00:09:19,761 - Claire! - I know. 221 00:09:19,808 --> 00:09:22,411 What?! You remember what happened to me?! 222 00:09:22,466 --> 00:09:24,999 I honestly thought it was the last time I was going to see him. 223 00:09:25,075 --> 00:09:26,638 Um, I mean, that's awful, but if I... 224 00:09:26,700 --> 00:09:29,278 - His little face was just... - Anthony! 225 00:09:29,364 --> 00:09:31,611 - Is this what you asked for? - No, of course not! 226 00:09:31,659 --> 00:09:33,470 He's just a bastard. 227 00:09:35,160 --> 00:09:36,520 Right, fuck it. 228 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:39,079 - What?! - Come on! 229 00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:41,040 No, no! It's... All right! 230 00:09:41,087 --> 00:09:42,962 Come on! 231 00:09:43,017 --> 00:09:44,243 Slow down! 232 00:09:48,100 --> 00:09:49,499 Hey! 233 00:09:49,551 --> 00:09:50,813 - No! - Anthony. 234 00:09:50,887 --> 00:09:53,379 No! That is exactly what she asked for. 235 00:09:53,434 --> 00:09:54,801 No, it's not! We want compensation. 236 00:09:54,856 --> 00:09:57,139 - Claire? - I've got two important meetings 237 00:09:57,179 --> 00:09:58,717 and I look like a pencil. 238 00:09:58,756 --> 00:10:01,115 No! Don't blame me for your bad choices. 239 00:10:01,160 --> 00:10:02,839 Hair isn't everything. 240 00:10:02,840 --> 00:10:04,398 Wow! 241 00:10:04,468 --> 00:10:05,804 What? 242 00:10:06,120 --> 00:10:08,687 Hair is everything. 243 00:10:08,734 --> 00:10:09,937 We wish it wasn't, 244 00:10:09,992 --> 00:10:11,733 so we could actually think about something else occasionally, 245 00:10:11,758 --> 00:10:13,015 but it is. 246 00:10:13,078 --> 00:10:15,516 It's the difference between a good day and a bad day. 247 00:10:15,562 --> 00:10:17,039 We're meant to think that it's a symbol of power, 248 00:10:17,086 --> 00:10:18,305 that it's a symbol of fertility. 249 00:10:18,329 --> 00:10:19,539 Some people are exploited for it 250 00:10:19,586 --> 00:10:20,851 and it pays your fucking bills! 251 00:10:20,916 --> 00:10:23,961 Hair is everything, Anthony. 252 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:25,815 Show her the reference. 253 00:10:27,508 --> 00:10:29,227 Claudia... 254 00:10:29,297 --> 00:10:30,651 ...bring me the bin. 255 00:10:45,071 --> 00:10:48,789 If you want to change your life, change your life. 256 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:51,289 It's not going to happen in here. 257 00:10:52,039 --> 00:10:53,242 Sorry, Anthony. 258 00:10:53,313 --> 00:10:55,913 - I didn't mean to turn up. - See you next week. 259 00:10:58,415 --> 00:10:59,814 You got any cigarettes? 260 00:10:59,899 --> 00:11:01,334 - No. - Good. 261 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:06,268 - Thank you for being there. - It was cathartic. 262 00:11:06,328 --> 00:11:07,572 At the hospital. 263 00:11:07,658 --> 00:11:09,279 Oh, it's okay. 264 00:11:09,326 --> 00:11:12,086 Shame you didn't get to keep that doctor. 265 00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:17,280 I'm sorry you lost it. 266 00:11:18,495 --> 00:11:20,999 I just felt... 267 00:11:21,366 --> 00:11:23,166 ...relief. 268 00:11:25,976 --> 00:11:28,648 I didn't want my husband's baby. 269 00:11:28,740 --> 00:11:30,492 Isn't that awful? 270 00:11:34,445 --> 00:11:37,326 I haven't even asked you how you are? 271 00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:39,779 How are you? What's going on with you? 272 00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:41,951 Um... 273 00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:43,427 ...I met someone. 274 00:11:43,480 --> 00:11:45,446 - What? Really? - Yeah. 275 00:11:45,509 --> 00:11:49,165 Oh, my God, that's amazing! What does he do? 276 00:11:49,203 --> 00:11:50,479 He's a priest. 277 00:12:05,120 --> 00:12:07,040 Is it...? 278 00:12:07,828 --> 00:12:09,027 Yep. 279 00:12:09,084 --> 00:12:11,523 - Oh, my God. - Yeah. 280 00:12:12,040 --> 00:12:14,419 - You are joking? - No. 281 00:12:19,461 --> 00:12:22,211 - I'm sorry. - I know. 282 00:12:22,280 --> 00:12:25,024 It's just, I'm sure it's very complicated. 283 00:12:25,086 --> 00:12:27,620 - Yes! It's very painful. - But it, it's just... 284 00:12:27,667 --> 00:12:29,479 ...you're a genius. 285 00:12:29,519 --> 00:12:31,277 You're my fucking hero. 286 00:12:31,706 --> 00:12:33,179 Claire? 287 00:12:33,234 --> 00:12:34,429 Is that you? 288 00:12:34,484 --> 00:12:36,453 Oh, God. Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, God! 289 00:12:36,500 --> 00:12:37,727 - Claire! - Klare! 290 00:12:37,752 --> 00:12:39,744 - Hi! - Oh, my God, Claire, 291 00:12:39,790 --> 00:12:42,415 - I love your hair! - Oh! 292 00:12:42,462 --> 00:12:46,502 Claire, it's so cute and edgy and cool. 293 00:12:46,581 --> 00:12:49,400 - Oh, thank you. - Like superstar, pop star. 294 00:12:51,583 --> 00:12:54,232 Listen, these penguins are taking me 295 00:12:54,310 --> 00:12:57,477 to this new amazing London music thing. 296 00:12:57,511 --> 00:12:59,257 - Are you free? - Yes. 297 00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:01,797 - You want to come? - Oh, I... 298 00:13:01,852 --> 00:13:03,766 I have to take my step-son his bassoon. 299 00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:06,086 I mean, I wish I could. 300 00:13:07,240 --> 00:13:09,986 Well, I leave tomorrow. So... 301 00:13:10,064 --> 00:13:11,228 Oh. 302 00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:13,103 I'll take the bassoon. 303 00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:15,283 I've got it. I'll take it. 304 00:13:15,330 --> 00:13:17,666 Oh, um... No, he's expecting me to. 305 00:13:17,720 --> 00:13:20,139 No, no. No, just, just tell Jake it's with me at the cafe. 306 00:13:20,179 --> 00:13:21,427 - Honestly, it's fine. - Oh. 307 00:13:21,452 --> 00:13:24,211 Hey, I don't want to get in the way of your family day. 308 00:13:24,280 --> 00:13:27,519 No, I'll take it. Please, get in the way of her family days. 309 00:13:27,563 --> 00:13:30,420 Just tell Jake I've got it. 310 00:13:31,040 --> 00:13:32,311 No biggie. 311 00:13:32,928 --> 00:13:35,366 Bye, Claire. Bye, Klare. 312 00:13:35,745 --> 00:13:37,305 Bye, Claire. 313 00:13:37,490 --> 00:13:39,615 I can't believe your hair! 314 00:13:41,129 --> 00:13:43,793 It's so chic and cute! It's all the things! 315 00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:46,020 Really? 316 00:13:47,067 --> 00:13:48,707 Goes so well with your top. 317 00:13:48,786 --> 00:13:50,574 My, God, that's so sweet of you. 318 00:13:50,940 --> 00:13:52,473 Honestly, I've had such a day with it. 319 00:13:52,551 --> 00:13:54,465 - Yeah, all right. - Yeah. 320 00:13:56,608 --> 00:13:58,199 Oh, fuck! 321 00:14:02,614 --> 00:14:04,224 Sorry! 322 00:14:04,800 --> 00:14:06,779 Well, that was exhausting. 323 00:14:06,840 --> 00:14:09,224 - The new guinea pig... - Hamster. 324 00:14:09,286 --> 00:14:10,989 ...is in with Hillary. 325 00:14:11,028 --> 00:14:14,639 They shared the cucumber okay, which was quite sweet. 326 00:14:14,640 --> 00:14:15,759 Thanks. 327 00:14:15,760 --> 00:14:17,739 Well, I'd say any time but, uh... 328 00:14:17,793 --> 00:14:19,159 You have a new job. 329 00:14:19,160 --> 00:14:20,767 I will be back, though. 330 00:14:21,127 --> 00:14:23,635 My wife would love Chatty Wednesdays. 331 00:14:24,160 --> 00:14:26,252 - Love them. - Ah. 332 00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:29,330 Oh! You have a visitor. 333 00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:31,078 He said he knew you, so I let him wait in there. 334 00:14:31,141 --> 00:14:33,080 Oh? Oh. 335 00:14:35,800 --> 00:14:37,175 Pleasure doing business with you. 336 00:14:38,123 --> 00:14:39,523 Bye. 337 00:14:43,320 --> 00:14:44,680 He took the pinny. 338 00:14:48,864 --> 00:14:50,208 - Ugh. - Hey! 339 00:14:50,278 --> 00:14:51,950 He's going to make a bassoon joke. 340 00:14:51,989 --> 00:14:54,898 Is that a bassoon in your hand or are you just pleased to see me? 341 00:14:54,945 --> 00:14:56,695 Would you say that to your son? 342 00:14:56,786 --> 00:14:59,191 When he has his bassoon, sure. 343 00:14:59,253 --> 00:15:03,261 But he's never pleased to see me, so... 344 00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:05,987 It doesn't even make sense. Why would a bassoon in my hand... 345 00:15:06,042 --> 00:15:07,388 Like a dick in your hand. 346 00:15:07,443 --> 00:15:09,623 Oh, right so if I was walking towards you with an amputated dick 347 00:15:09,685 --> 00:15:11,130 in my hand you'd think I was horny. 348 00:15:11,193 --> 00:15:12,365 Well, I'd assume that you had been. 349 00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:15,193 Certainly wouldn't put it past you to chop a dick off. 350 00:15:16,410 --> 00:15:17,660 Put the guinea pig down. 351 00:15:17,730 --> 00:15:20,160 - Where is she? - Why? 352 00:15:20,574 --> 00:15:23,243 Well, she was meant to have dropped that off 353 00:15:23,305 --> 00:15:25,493 - and she's not at the office. - Oh, I don't know where she is. 354 00:15:25,539 --> 00:15:27,711 So, you just found that, huh? 355 00:15:27,782 --> 00:15:28,879 Hm. 356 00:15:28,938 --> 00:15:30,353 Please don't hurt the guinea pig. 357 00:15:31,735 --> 00:15:34,064 I would never hurt the guinea pig. 358 00:15:35,400 --> 00:15:37,602 I wouldn't do that. 359 00:15:38,400 --> 00:15:40,094 Here we go, sweetie. 360 00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:42,145 Come on, here. 361 00:15:44,070 --> 00:15:45,849 It's fucking adorable. 362 00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:47,442 Are you sure we should even be talking? 363 00:15:47,505 --> 00:15:50,295 Aren't you supposed to be getting me arrested or something? 364 00:15:50,349 --> 00:15:52,220 Wow. 365 00:15:52,264 --> 00:15:55,303 She really tells you everything, doesn't she, hm? 366 00:15:55,360 --> 00:15:57,600 Cute tables. 367 00:15:57,694 --> 00:16:00,483 - Ah, Jesus, Martin. - Fuck off! 368 00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:07,686 You are the problem, you know that? 369 00:16:07,741 --> 00:16:13,319 You are the problem in my perfect, awful life. 370 00:16:13,420 --> 00:16:15,186 I haven't seen you in a year. 371 00:16:15,256 --> 00:16:20,127 And yet still off she runs, into the night, for you. 372 00:16:22,158 --> 00:16:24,127 I can't even get the woman pregnant. 373 00:16:24,181 --> 00:16:27,799 And then you come in showing off about your miscarriage, 374 00:16:27,863 --> 00:16:30,261 like you didn't even want the one you had. 375 00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:33,240 I was just trying to make her feel better! 376 00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:41,837 - Give me your phone. - No. 377 00:16:41,938 --> 00:16:43,712 Give me your phone. 378 00:16:43,767 --> 00:16:44,743 No! 379 00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:48,713 Is she leaving me? 380 00:16:49,611 --> 00:16:50,829 I hope so. 381 00:16:52,960 --> 00:16:54,928 Don't let her leave me. 382 00:16:57,622 --> 00:16:59,942 Don't let her leave me, please. 383 00:17:04,672 --> 00:17:06,346 I hope she doesn't come home tonight. 384 00:17:10,049 --> 00:17:12,158 Ah! Cashmere, cashmere, cashmere! 385 00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:15,154 I will take you down, fucker. 386 00:17:15,215 --> 00:17:16,482 I will take you down, fucker. 387 00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:21,607 - Fuck you! - Fuck you! 388 00:17:21,669 --> 00:17:23,826 - Fuck you! - Fuck you! 389 00:17:23,880 --> 00:17:27,065 Fuck you! You better start sleeping with a lawyer! 390 00:17:27,135 --> 00:17:28,502 I'm already sleeping with a lawyer! 391 00:17:28,569 --> 00:17:30,948 Yeah, lucky lawyer! 392 00:17:32,718 --> 00:17:34,278 Shit! 393 00:17:40,133 --> 00:17:41,858 I'd better call my lawyer. 394 00:17:44,467 --> 00:17:46,319 You know that feeling when the hot misogynist who might not be 395 00:17:46,357 --> 00:17:48,148 a misogynist is turning up at your house for the second time 396 00:17:48,211 --> 00:17:50,406 in 48 hours to give you nine orgasms you don't want, 397 00:17:50,445 --> 00:17:52,574 just to do something to get your head out of the fact the only person 398 00:17:52,637 --> 00:17:54,341 you want to see in the world is the priest that you... 399 00:17:56,650 --> 00:17:58,908 So, you pick yourself up, cover yourself in coconut oil 400 00:17:58,983 --> 00:18:01,963 and hope he hasn't noticed that you haven't shaved your... 401 00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:03,541 Hey. 402 00:18:06,040 --> 00:18:07,960 Your sister gave me your address. 403 00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:11,395 Are you on your way out? 404 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:13,319 Oh, no, I just... I just got in. 405 00:18:13,379 --> 00:18:15,129 I've only got underwear under this coat. 406 00:18:15,231 --> 00:18:17,222 Okay. Can I come in? 407 00:18:17,315 --> 00:18:19,089 Yeah, sure. 408 00:18:25,008 --> 00:18:27,500 - It's nice. - Oh, thank you. 409 00:18:28,064 --> 00:18:29,560 Uh... 410 00:18:31,921 --> 00:18:33,138 Water? 411 00:18:33,202 --> 00:18:36,167 No, thanks, I want to keep a clear head. 412 00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:38,335 Uh, I've changed my mind about the wedding. 413 00:18:38,397 --> 00:18:41,043 I can't let them down like that. 414 00:18:41,114 --> 00:18:42,942 And apparently no-one else will wear the outfit. 415 00:18:42,996 --> 00:18:44,059 Well, that's good of you. 416 00:18:44,121 --> 00:18:47,831 - You gonna take off your coat, or...? - Oh... no. No, I'm good. 417 00:18:47,883 --> 00:18:49,803 I'm a bit chilly. 418 00:18:52,680 --> 00:18:55,920 I sacrificed a lot for this life. 419 00:18:56,440 --> 00:18:58,912 You know? I've given a lot of things up. 420 00:18:59,010 --> 00:19:01,365 Um, so that... 421 00:19:09,241 --> 00:19:10,843 Do you want to get that? 422 00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:14,015 Oh, no. I don't like opening the door to people I don't know. 423 00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:16,153 I'm baaack! 424 00:19:17,911 --> 00:19:20,931 Look if-if... if-if there's someone you need to see 425 00:19:21,017 --> 00:19:22,627 or, or let in, or...? 426 00:19:22,689 --> 00:19:24,650 No, honestly, honestly, it's fine. 427 00:19:31,790 --> 00:19:34,103 When I was a child, I... 428 00:19:34,180 --> 00:19:35,399 - Me lady?! - I'm just... 429 00:19:35,462 --> 00:19:38,190 I'll just be, um, just... 430 00:19:40,784 --> 00:19:42,239 So, you're in trouble again, huh? 431 00:19:42,307 --> 00:19:43,980 Oh, my God, listen, you can't come in. 432 00:19:44,041 --> 00:19:45,760 Okay! You want to do it on the doorstep? 433 00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:49,032 Uh, no. My priest is here and he really needs some guidance. 434 00:19:49,854 --> 00:19:51,991 What? Is he okay? 435 00:19:52,063 --> 00:19:54,055 No, I'm hoping he's having an emotional crisis. 436 00:19:54,125 --> 00:19:55,854 Shall I wait? You said you wanted to see me? 437 00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:58,370 Yes, I did want to see you, but now I don't want to see you. 438 00:19:58,448 --> 00:20:00,664 Did I do something wrong? You seemed to like what I did? 439 00:20:00,719 --> 00:20:01,679 I did. 440 00:20:01,720 --> 00:20:03,703 - I'm really good at it. - Yes, I know you are. Yeah. 441 00:20:03,765 --> 00:20:05,593 - I'm really good at it. - Yeah, I know you are. 442 00:20:05,671 --> 00:20:07,257 - I'm really... - Yeah, yeah, you're really good at it. 443 00:20:07,311 --> 00:20:08,538 Well, clearly, I'm not? 444 00:20:08,578 --> 00:20:09,639 - If you don't want it? - Oh, for God's sake. 445 00:20:09,694 --> 00:20:11,715 You're the best sex I've ever had. 446 00:20:11,786 --> 00:20:13,864 - What? - You're the best sex I've ever had. 447 00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:15,176 Really? 448 00:20:15,254 --> 00:20:17,853 Honestly, you... you made me cum nine times. 449 00:20:19,226 --> 00:20:20,826 Honestly? 450 00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:23,639 Cool. 451 00:20:23,697 --> 00:20:25,704 - Do you want me to go? - Yeah. 452 00:20:25,766 --> 00:20:28,297 - I could take this somewhere else. - Okay, good. Good for her. 453 00:20:29,920 --> 00:20:32,511 Nine times. You're a saint. 454 00:20:38,861 --> 00:20:41,272 - I'm sorry that was... - No, it's okay. I won't ask. 455 00:20:43,159 --> 00:20:44,558 Nine times? 456 00:20:44,629 --> 00:20:47,025 - I just had to get rid of him. - Sure. 457 00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:51,861 I can't be physical with you. 458 00:20:52,928 --> 00:20:54,666 What, we can't even wrestle? 459 00:20:57,552 --> 00:20:59,831 Well, priests have sex, you know. 460 00:20:59,904 --> 00:21:01,044 A lot of them actually do. 461 00:21:01,120 --> 00:21:03,052 They don't burst into flames, I googled it. 462 00:21:03,083 --> 00:21:05,976 I can't have sex with you, because I'll fall in love with you. 463 00:21:06,626 --> 00:21:10,522 And if I fall in love with you, I won't burst into flames, but... 464 00:21:11,569 --> 00:21:13,360 ...my life will be fucked. 465 00:21:15,166 --> 00:21:16,617 We're going to have sex. 466 00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:19,877 - I'm supposed to love one thing. - Oh, my God, we're gonna have sex. 467 00:21:19,935 --> 00:21:21,924 For fuck's sake! Stop that! 468 00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:28,010 I don't think you want to be told what to do at all. 469 00:21:28,063 --> 00:21:29,455 I think you know exactly what you want to do. 470 00:21:29,494 --> 00:21:31,143 If you really wanted to be told what to you do, 471 00:21:31,205 --> 00:21:32,570 you'd be wearing one of these. 472 00:21:32,585 --> 00:21:33,812 Women aren't actually allowed to... 473 00:21:33,872 --> 00:21:36,201 Oh, fuck off, I know! 474 00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:48,760 We're going to have sex, aren't we? 475 00:21:55,600 --> 00:21:57,050 Yeah. 476 00:21:57,652 --> 00:21:59,253 Yeah. 477 00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:04,040 Okay. 478 00:22:25,440 --> 00:22:28,257 Oh! Whoa! Okay. Uh... 479 00:22:28,282 --> 00:22:29,305 Listen I had a... 480 00:22:29,329 --> 00:22:31,757 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Sh, sh, sh, sh. 481 00:23:02,975 --> 00:23:07,975 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www.addic7ed.com 34376

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