All language subtitles for The King of Queens (1998) - S09E13 - China Syndrome (2) (1080p BluRay x265 RCVR)

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,110 --> 00:00:06,823 - I want to make you happy, Arthur. - I have no doubt about that. 2 00:00:06,850 --> 00:00:08,821 See the picture. What is it? 3 00:00:08,845 --> 00:00:12,245 - I don't know. Some baby. - Yeah. Our baby. 4 00:00:14,271 --> 00:00:16,980 Her name is Ming Mei and is four days old. 5 00:00:16,981 --> 00:00:19,833 Isn't she beautiful? I must call to the adoption agency. 6 00:00:19,834 --> 00:00:22,705 - and tell her we'll be right over. to Beijing immediately. 7 00:00:22,706 --> 00:00:24,473 I don't get it. 8 00:00:24,474 --> 00:00:27,167 I've ordered Chinese before, but never a baby. 9 00:00:29,368 --> 00:00:31,054 We don't. 10 00:00:31,055 --> 00:00:32,393 What? What are you talking about? 11 00:00:32,394 --> 00:00:34,816 I know you don't part with the apartment. 12 00:00:34,817 --> 00:00:37,311 I should have got rid of it, but... 13 00:00:37,312 --> 00:00:40,992 We had a deal. I quit, and I love that job. 14 00:00:40,993 --> 00:00:43,010 You hated it. You always said that. 15 00:00:43,010 --> 00:00:46,451 But I sacrificed myself for our future, you didn't. 16 00:00:46,452 --> 00:00:48,453 Okay, Doug, what do you say? 17 00:00:48,454 --> 00:00:50,850 - That it's over? - I guess so. 18 00:01:34,970 --> 00:01:36,065 That's a great shot. Smile. 19 00:01:36,130 --> 00:01:37,241 Ohh. 20 00:01:38,387 --> 00:01:41,278 Oh, arthur, i've never been so happy in my life. 21 00:01:41,342 --> 00:01:44,201 If our marriage ended tomorrow, i have no regrets. 22 00:01:44,266 --> 00:01:46,346 Good to know. 23 00:01:46,411 --> 00:01:49,096 Holly, how are you? 24 00:01:49,160 --> 00:01:50,239 Hi, veronica. Hi, arthur. 25 00:01:50,304 --> 00:01:52,273 Congratulations. 26 00:01:52,338 --> 00:01:53,735 Look at you. You're pregnant. 27 00:01:53,799 --> 00:01:55,960 No, no. I made that mistake before. 28 00:01:56,024 --> 00:01:58,216 She has an eating disorder. 29 00:01:58,280 --> 00:01:59,868 Oh, no, no. I actually am pregnant. 30 00:01:59,933 --> 00:02:02,014 Oh, wonderful. So, where's your husband? 31 00:02:02,078 --> 00:02:03,380 Uh, yeah. Where is he? 32 00:02:03,444 --> 00:02:05,764 Uh, he must've gone to the men's room. 33 00:02:05,828 --> 00:02:08,577 Oh, that's where arthur proposed to me. 34 00:02:08,641 --> 00:02:10,451 Oh. I've had that happen, yeah. 35 00:02:10,516 --> 00:02:12,676 Actually, it was more of a porta-Potty. 36 00:02:12,740 --> 00:02:14,201 But anyway, congratulations. 37 00:02:14,266 --> 00:02:15,600 Thank you, sweetheart. 38 00:02:22,937 --> 00:02:24,128 Carrie, congratulations. 39 00:02:24,193 --> 00:02:25,367 Thank you, lou. 40 00:02:25,432 --> 00:02:26,798 It's a happy day, isn't it? 41 00:02:26,862 --> 00:02:28,720 Yes, very happy day. 42 00:02:36,544 --> 00:02:37,195 Hello. 43 00:02:37,259 --> 00:02:38,578 Hey. 44 00:02:38,643 --> 00:02:40,277 You're lookin' well. 45 00:02:40,342 --> 00:02:42,565 I, uh, like the new highlights. 46 00:02:43,775 --> 00:02:44,759 Thank you. 47 00:02:45,924 --> 00:02:47,559 Look, danny, i know things got ugly 48 00:02:47,623 --> 00:02:49,052 Between us when i moved out, 49 00:02:49,117 --> 00:02:50,609 And that- That was my fault, 50 00:02:50,674 --> 00:02:52,486 And i just wanna say i'm sorry. 51 00:02:52,550 --> 00:02:54,312 Hey, man, don't worry about it, buddy, all right? 52 00:02:54,377 --> 00:02:57,538 Good. Well, now that, you know, arthur's marrying my mom, 53 00:02:57,603 --> 00:03:00,493 Um, he's probably gonna be taking, uh, my bed 54 00:03:00,559 --> 00:03:02,718 Since it's same as hers, 55 00:03:02,783 --> 00:03:06,469 So i was wondering if maybe i could... 56 00:03:06,533 --> 00:03:08,216 Move back... 57 00:03:09,855 --> 00:03:10,935 Who's this? 58 00:03:10,999 --> 00:03:14,016 This is, uh, sandy, my new girlfriend 59 00:03:14,081 --> 00:03:16,750 And roommate. 60 00:03:16,814 --> 00:03:18,577 Roommate? That's... 61 00:03:18,642 --> 00:03:19,785 Great. 62 00:03:19,850 --> 00:03:21,390 Yeah, i moved in last week. 63 00:03:21,454 --> 00:03:22,947 Oh, i had to pack up some of your stuff 64 00:03:23,012 --> 00:03:25,839 To make some room in the closet, mostly... 65 00:03:25,903 --> 00:03:28,096 Magazines. 66 00:03:28,160 --> 00:03:31,083 Yeah, those are for a research project about thailand, 67 00:03:32,547 --> 00:03:33,945 With, um... 68 00:03:36,837 --> 00:03:38,617 Hey, spence, congratulations. 69 00:03:38,682 --> 00:03:39,713 Oh. Thanks, lou. 70 00:03:39,777 --> 00:03:40,938 Happy day, isn't it? 71 00:03:41,002 --> 00:03:42,144 Very happy. Um, 72 00:03:42,208 --> 00:03:44,719 Would you excuse me for a second? 73 00:03:51,526 --> 00:03:53,208 Doug? 74 00:03:53,273 --> 00:03:54,305 Spencer! 75 00:03:54,370 --> 00:03:56,499 Hey, buddy, party's out here. 76 00:03:56,563 --> 00:03:58,850 Let me just get you set up, man. 77 00:03:58,915 --> 00:04:00,852 I gotta get you set up. 78 00:04:02,473 --> 00:04:04,092 Ah. There you go, buddy. 79 00:04:04,157 --> 00:04:06,097 Sit down. Sit down. Oh, god. 80 00:04:06,162 --> 00:04:06,890 Hey. 81 00:04:07,854 --> 00:04:09,872 What-Wh-What are you doing out here? 82 00:04:09,936 --> 00:04:12,478 Just celebratin' my freedom. 83 00:04:13,592 --> 00:04:15,799 Carrie and i are gettin' a divorce. 84 00:04:15,863 --> 00:04:17,038 What?! 85 00:04:17,102 --> 00:04:18,834 Mm-Hmm. Turns out she kept 86 00:04:18,899 --> 00:04:20,995 Her apartment in manhattan, 87 00:04:21,059 --> 00:04:24,238 So split 'em up! 88 00:04:24,301 --> 00:04:26,462 Doug, i have a confession to make. 89 00:04:26,527 --> 00:04:30,275 I'm the one that called and told you she was still in the apartment. 90 00:04:30,340 --> 00:04:31,356 Oh, yeah? Yeah, i- 91 00:04:31,389 --> 00:04:33,914 I thought i was in love with her. 92 00:04:33,978 --> 00:04:38,904 But-But i realize now it was because things weren't going well at home, and... 93 00:04:41,257 --> 00:04:43,958 Now that's gone, too. 94 00:04:45,294 --> 00:04:48,407 You are one sweet... 95 00:04:48,472 --> 00:04:51,267 Creepy little dude. 96 00:04:52,631 --> 00:04:55,953 Hey, if you wanna move in with me, that's cool. 97 00:04:56,018 --> 00:04:57,240 Really? 98 00:04:57,304 --> 00:04:58,654 You mean it? 99 00:04:58,718 --> 00:05:00,958 Hell to the yeah! 100 00:05:01,023 --> 00:05:03,817 I know i mess with you a lot, but... 101 00:05:03,881 --> 00:05:08,014 The truth is i love you more than any of my other friends. 102 00:05:08,077 --> 00:05:09,872 Well, thanks, doug. 103 00:05:09,936 --> 00:05:13,367 I- You know, y-You've always been kind of a hero to me. 104 00:05:13,432 --> 00:05:14,989 I am not a hero! 105 00:05:15,054 --> 00:05:15,846 I'll kill you! 106 00:05:15,910 --> 00:05:18,278 Ok, i didn't- 107 00:05:19,341 --> 00:05:21,216 I didn't mean anything by it. 108 00:05:21,281 --> 00:05:22,884 And now i love you. 109 00:05:22,949 --> 00:05:24,441 Come on. Let's wrestle. 110 00:05:26,794 --> 00:05:30,862 Aw, kel, i can't believe i screwed everything up. 111 00:05:30,926 --> 00:05:34,738 One moment of weakness, and i lost my husband, my ming mel. 112 00:05:36,932 --> 00:05:37,949 He really won't forgive you? 113 00:05:38,013 --> 00:05:39,602 No, and who can blame him? 114 00:05:39,666 --> 00:05:41,222 I mean, i didn't show him 115 00:05:41,285 --> 00:05:42,335 The commitment he deserves, 116 00:05:42,398 --> 00:05:43,700 And that is just unforgivable. 117 00:05:44,765 --> 00:05:47,402 Yeah, well, he's let you down lots of times. 118 00:05:47,467 --> 00:05:48,689 Yeah, but nothing like this. 119 00:05:48,754 --> 00:05:50,532 What about when he faked a heart attack 120 00:05:50,597 --> 00:05:53,312 Because he forgot your boss' name? 121 00:05:54,998 --> 00:05:56,396 That wasn't a big deal. 122 00:05:56,460 --> 00:06:00,463 What about when he used your tax refund to buy an ice-Cream truck? 123 00:06:02,228 --> 00:06:04,070 Yeah, but that was my fault. 124 00:06:04,135 --> 00:06:06,613 I shouldn't have left the check lying around. 125 00:06:06,677 --> 00:06:10,426 What about when you had to cancel your birthday trip to paris 126 00:06:10,491 --> 00:06:14,526 Because he was a semifinalist in a bladder bust contest? 127 00:06:14,591 --> 00:06:17,069 Yeah, that was a kick in the chiclets. 128 00:06:17,133 --> 00:06:19,087 Folks, we have a very special treat for you tonight. 129 00:06:19,151 --> 00:06:22,059 Our beautiful bride is gonna sing one of her hit records for us. 130 00:06:22,123 --> 00:06:23,440 So please welcome to the stage 131 00:06:23,457 --> 00:06:25,664 The very lovely and talented Ava st. Clair. 132 00:06:26,890 --> 00:06:30,098 I- I'm not Ava st. Clair. 133 00:06:30,162 --> 00:06:32,101 I'm not cliff robertson, but that didn't stop me 134 00:06:32,166 --> 00:06:34,167 From signing my meals to his hotel room. 135 00:06:34,232 --> 00:06:35,406 Now get up there. 136 00:06:36,647 --> 00:06:39,076 So would you care for garden or caesar? 137 00:06:39,140 --> 00:06:40,347 Uh, garden salad, please. 138 00:06:40,412 --> 00:06:43,558 And would you know if there's anyone sitting there? 139 00:06:44,622 --> 00:06:46,464 Yeah, my husband. Heh heh. 140 00:06:46,528 --> 00:06:49,007 I mean, of course i have a husband. 141 00:06:49,071 --> 00:06:49,960 Look at me. 142 00:06:51,613 --> 00:06:55,601 Of course. Do you know if he would like garden or caesar? 143 00:06:55,665 --> 00:06:57,699 Caesar. 144 00:06:58,964 --> 00:07:01,362 Holly, it's so good to see you. 145 00:07:01,426 --> 00:07:02,633 Hi, lou. 146 00:07:02,698 --> 00:07:03,746 Such a happy day. 147 00:07:03,809 --> 00:07:05,303 Oh, god. 148 00:07:16,441 --> 00:07:19,238 This is pornographic. 149 00:07:29,473 --> 00:07:31,046 Aah! 150 00:07:31,110 --> 00:07:32,506 Ohh! Aah! 151 00:07:32,571 --> 00:07:35,495 That-That's 11-4, me. 152 00:07:35,559 --> 00:07:37,084 Let's go. Hands and knees. 153 00:07:37,147 --> 00:07:39,307 No, i'm not wrestling with you anymore. 154 00:07:39,372 --> 00:07:41,215 You don't respect my safe word. 155 00:07:41,979 --> 00:07:43,726 Such a baby. 156 00:07:43,790 --> 00:07:46,650 Hey, holly. I'm drunk. Are you? 157 00:07:46,714 --> 00:07:47,381 No. 158 00:07:47,446 --> 00:07:50,670 Well, a little. 159 00:07:50,734 --> 00:07:52,148 Hey, hol. How's it goin'? 160 00:07:52,212 --> 00:07:53,261 Great. Great. 161 00:07:53,325 --> 00:07:54,452 My husband just left me, 162 00:07:54,516 --> 00:07:57,789 And i'm about to have a baby with no job and no money, 163 00:07:57,853 --> 00:07:59,346 But other than that, real good. 164 00:07:59,411 --> 00:08:00,840 I'm splittin' up with carrie. 165 00:08:00,905 --> 00:08:02,619 You wanna move in with me? 166 00:08:02,684 --> 00:08:06,321 Really? Oh, my god. Yes. Yes. 167 00:08:06,385 --> 00:08:09,071 No, no. You-Wait. You said i could move in with you. 168 00:08:09,134 --> 00:08:11,262 Did i? You're out. Holly's in. 169 00:08:12,827 --> 00:08:15,942 Doug, i-I can't believe how kind and generous you're being. 170 00:08:16,006 --> 00:08:18,770 I mean, honestly, i didn't even think you liked me that much. 171 00:08:18,835 --> 00:08:22,806 No. Truth is, i mean, i love you more than any of my other friends. 172 00:08:22,871 --> 00:08:24,746 Oh, my god. 173 00:08:24,810 --> 00:08:26,334 Doug, i'm-Thank you. 174 00:08:26,398 --> 00:08:28,574 I really needed to hear something like that right now. 175 00:08:28,639 --> 00:08:29,512 Oh, no problem. 176 00:08:29,577 --> 00:08:31,403 Come on. Let's wrestle. 177 00:08:33,512 --> 00:08:34,781 Thank you very much. 178 00:08:34,846 --> 00:08:36,973 Now if i could have your attention, it's time for the toast. 179 00:08:37,038 --> 00:08:39,008 Toasting our groom, arthur spooner, 180 00:08:39,072 --> 00:08:42,042 Is his best man and son-In-Law, doug heffernan. 181 00:08:54,009 --> 00:08:55,947 Holly, have you seen douglas? 182 00:08:56,012 --> 00:08:58,458 He fell asleep when we were wrestling. 183 00:09:00,143 --> 00:09:02,335 Well, at least you weren't under him when it happened. 184 00:09:02,400 --> 00:09:05,131 That was 6 of the most terrifying hours of my life. 185 00:09:10,287 --> 00:09:12,479 Spence, congratulations. You're my new best man. 186 00:09:12,544 --> 00:09:15,117 Now get up there and toast me, kid. 187 00:09:15,782 --> 00:09:17,243 I don't feel like it, arthur. 188 00:09:17,307 --> 00:09:19,212 I'm having a very rough night. 189 00:09:19,277 --> 00:09:21,596 I'm your father. I command you to toast me. 190 00:09:23,042 --> 00:09:26,570 I'll toast who i want when i want. 191 00:09:26,635 --> 00:09:28,572 You got that, dad? 192 00:09:28,636 --> 00:09:30,765 This isn't over. 193 00:09:33,705 --> 00:09:35,229 Hey, uh, heh. 194 00:09:35,294 --> 00:09:38,186 Like the way you stood up to him there. 195 00:09:38,250 --> 00:09:39,933 Oh, thanks. Thanks. 196 00:09:39,997 --> 00:09:41,905 You know, kind of reminded me of the way 197 00:09:41,970 --> 00:09:44,447 You stood up to our landlord about that roach problem. 198 00:09:44,512 --> 00:09:48,164 Oh. Well, the lease clearly states when there's more than a thousand, 199 00:09:48,229 --> 00:09:49,849 It's his responsibility. 200 00:09:50,813 --> 00:09:52,416 You see, i wouldn't have known that. 201 00:09:52,481 --> 00:09:55,182 Hey, did you see america's next top model this week? 202 00:09:55,246 --> 00:09:57,883 Yes! Can you believe it came down to marquesa and lisi? 203 00:09:57,948 --> 00:10:01,442 I know! I mean, it's so obvious who's gonna win this thing. 204 00:10:01,506 --> 00:10:02,587 Duh. Marquesa. Marquesa. 205 00:10:02,651 --> 00:10:04,462 Ha ha ha ha ha! 206 00:10:04,527 --> 00:10:05,844 Marquesa. Eww. 207 00:10:05,910 --> 00:10:08,609 Lisi's way better for couture. 208 00:10:12,773 --> 00:10:15,076 Come on, danny. Let's go home. I'm bored. 209 00:10:15,141 --> 00:10:18,190 All right. Why don't you, uh, go grab your jacket? 210 00:10:18,255 --> 00:10:20,097 I'll be right with you. Ok. 211 00:10:23,147 --> 00:10:24,990 Sorry about the whole marquesa thing. 212 00:10:25,054 --> 00:10:26,262 It's cool. It's cool. 213 00:10:27,692 --> 00:10:29,852 Well, i guess she's waitin' for me. 214 00:10:29,917 --> 00:10:30,965 Better take off. 215 00:10:31,030 --> 00:10:32,935 Yeah. See you at the allergist's. 216 00:10:35,320 --> 00:10:37,114 I don't even know you that well. 217 00:10:37,178 --> 00:10:39,894 I'm a crusty curmudgeon with a heart of gold. 218 00:10:39,959 --> 00:10:40,943 Now go! 219 00:10:47,337 --> 00:10:51,214 Hi. Uh, i'll never forget the first time i met arthur. 220 00:10:51,279 --> 00:10:54,091 I was, uh, sitting in the heffernan living room, watching tv. 221 00:10:55,555 --> 00:10:58,032 Uh, arthur came in, and when he saw me, 222 00:10:58,097 --> 00:11:02,259 He begged me not to hurt him, then ran off to call the police. 223 00:11:02,323 --> 00:11:04,738 Ha ha ha ha ha! 224 00:11:04,802 --> 00:11:06,232 Hoo! 225 00:11:06,296 --> 00:11:08,583 And, hello, remember that time your appendix burst 226 00:11:08,647 --> 00:11:10,490 And he wouldn't leave work early? 227 00:11:10,554 --> 00:11:13,763 He did leave work early to go to the rodeo. 228 00:11:15,449 --> 00:11:16,846 That's it. 229 00:11:16,911 --> 00:11:18,101 I just-I think you'll feel better 230 00:11:18,166 --> 00:11:20,103 If you have a little something to eat. 231 00:11:20,168 --> 00:11:21,979 I'll get you my husband's prime rib. 232 00:11:22,043 --> 00:11:23,249 Oh. Thank you, spence. 233 00:11:26,911 --> 00:11:30,184 You know, you really had me goin' out there, doug. 234 00:11:30,249 --> 00:11:31,407 "I took a leap of faith for you. 235 00:11:31,472 --> 00:11:32,964 You didn't take a leap of faith for me." 236 00:11:33,029 --> 00:11:34,521 Do you know how many times in our marriage 237 00:11:34,586 --> 00:11:36,651 You have screwed me over to do what you wanted to do? 238 00:11:36,716 --> 00:11:39,177 Aw, here we go with the rodeo again. 239 00:11:39,241 --> 00:11:41,783 It comes to town once a year! 240 00:11:41,848 --> 00:11:44,183 It wasn't just that, doug. It was many other things, 241 00:11:44,247 --> 00:11:45,708 And i forgave you for everything, 242 00:11:45,771 --> 00:11:48,187 So you damn well better forgive me for this. 243 00:11:48,251 --> 00:11:50,984 You don't tell me what i better damn well better do. 244 00:11:51,848 --> 00:11:53,087 Ok, you know what? 245 00:11:53,151 --> 00:11:55,232 Do whatever you wanna do, but let me tell you something. 246 00:11:55,297 --> 00:11:56,853 I love this baby, and i want her, 247 00:11:56,917 --> 00:11:58,600 And i am gonna get her for myself. 248 00:11:58,664 --> 00:12:01,000 Oh, no. No, no, no, 'cause i wanted a baby first, ok? 249 00:12:01,064 --> 00:12:03,674 So if anybody's gonna get the baby, it's gonna be me. 250 00:12:04,238 --> 00:12:05,302 Oh, you really think so, butch? 251 00:12:05,367 --> 00:12:07,749 Well, i'm on my way to china right now to get her. 252 00:12:07,814 --> 00:12:10,180 Yeah? Not if i get there first. 253 00:12:12,580 --> 00:12:14,947 I'm gonna get there first. 254 00:12:15,012 --> 00:12:16,219 Whoa. 255 00:12:26,011 --> 00:12:30,665 And then there was the time arthur thought i was eddie murphy. 256 00:12:30,729 --> 00:12:31,396 Hey, we gotta go. 257 00:12:31,541 --> 00:12:32,827 Go. Go where? 258 00:12:32,891 --> 00:12:34,241 To china to get my baby. Come on. 259 00:12:34,305 --> 00:12:35,861 Actually, you can just drop me at the airport 260 00:12:35,926 --> 00:12:36,974 If you don't wanna come with. 261 00:12:37,039 --> 00:12:38,340 Uh, sure. 262 00:12:38,405 --> 00:12:40,215 Let's all toast arthur spooner, a great guy 263 00:12:40,279 --> 00:12:42,249 Who's a little racist. 264 00:12:44,602 --> 00:12:46,841 Doug, should i move in after you get back from china or- 265 00:12:46,906 --> 00:12:49,781 Hey, holly! Glad to see you could make it. 266 00:12:51,974 --> 00:12:54,898 Well, i guess i'm back out on the street. 267 00:12:54,962 --> 00:12:58,251 Well, seeing as you and i are in the same situation, 268 00:12:58,315 --> 00:13:00,379 Do you wanna get a place together? 269 00:13:00,444 --> 00:13:02,128 Really? You mean it? 270 00:13:02,192 --> 00:13:05,656 Oh, of course. I-I would like nothing better than... 271 00:13:08,325 --> 00:13:09,484 You forget something? 272 00:13:09,548 --> 00:13:10,818 Yeah. 273 00:13:10,882 --> 00:13:13,678 I forgot my roommate. 274 00:13:16,064 --> 00:13:18,128 W- Wait. You and i were gonna- 275 00:13:18,192 --> 00:13:20,606 Yeah, that's not gonna work out. 276 00:13:34,357 --> 00:13:37,041 Well, you know, if things work out between us, 277 00:13:37,106 --> 00:13:38,440 You'll have to convert. 278 00:13:38,505 --> 00:13:41,030 Of course i will. 279 00:13:41,093 --> 00:13:42,825 To what? 280 00:13:51,772 --> 00:13:53,235 I'll just get my passport, 281 00:13:53,297 --> 00:13:55,903 And then we'll get the hell out of here. 282 00:13:55,967 --> 00:13:57,254 Doug, you've never been out of america. 283 00:13:57,318 --> 00:13:58,016 Why do you even have a passport? 284 00:13:58,160 --> 00:14:00,893 I heard they still had the mcrib in canada. 285 00:14:02,436 --> 00:14:05,469 Oh, hey. Off to china. Don't wait up. 286 00:14:05,533 --> 00:14:06,676 Hey! Did you take my passport? 287 00:14:06,741 --> 00:14:08,567 Oh, no, babe, it's still here... 288 00:14:08,631 --> 00:14:10,284 Somewhere. 289 00:14:23,855 --> 00:14:25,475 Hello. 290 00:14:26,588 --> 00:14:28,461 You found it? 291 00:14:28,526 --> 00:14:32,513 Gotta admit the vegetable crisper was an inspired choice. 292 00:14:32,578 --> 00:14:34,913 But you've never gone in that drawer your whole life. 293 00:14:34,977 --> 00:14:36,564 You don't even know it exists. 294 00:14:37,629 --> 00:14:39,789 But deacon does. 295 00:14:39,854 --> 00:14:41,792 His b.L.T. Was delicious, 296 00:14:41,857 --> 00:14:44,017 As is my revenge. 297 00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:04,028 Doug. Hmm? 298 00:15:04,793 --> 00:15:05,996 Doug. 299 00:15:08,112 --> 00:15:11,178 Oh, god. 300 00:15:11,242 --> 00:15:12,577 What? 301 00:15:12,641 --> 00:15:13,816 So what's our endgame here? 302 00:15:13,881 --> 00:15:16,168 What are we gonna do when we land? 303 00:15:16,233 --> 00:15:19,886 We gonna race through the streets of beijing to the adoption agency? 304 00:15:20,950 --> 00:15:22,444 I don't know. 305 00:15:22,508 --> 00:15:25,366 Because if we have to take rickshaws, you'll lose. 306 00:15:28,831 --> 00:15:30,533 Not if it's downhill. 307 00:15:34,235 --> 00:15:35,776 What happened here? 308 00:15:35,840 --> 00:15:37,858 I don't know. 309 00:15:37,922 --> 00:15:41,321 You know, when my, uh... 310 00:15:41,385 --> 00:15:44,182 When my mom died when i was a kid, 311 00:15:45,946 --> 00:15:50,204 It felt like i was nothing, you know, like i had no life. 312 00:15:50,269 --> 00:15:54,288 My dad did his best to be a good parent, but... 313 00:15:54,353 --> 00:15:56,258 Who we kiddin'? 314 00:15:56,322 --> 00:16:00,421 Anyway, on-On sundays, he used to take me 315 00:16:00,485 --> 00:16:02,486 To this park on vernon boulevard, 316 00:16:02,551 --> 00:16:04,489 Right on the east river, 317 00:16:04,552 --> 00:16:07,031 Where you could look across and see manhattan. 318 00:16:08,240 --> 00:16:10,814 And while he was, uh, off 319 00:16:10,878 --> 00:16:14,023 Handing out leaflets or chasing squirrels, 320 00:16:14,087 --> 00:16:16,249 I would just stand at the railing, 321 00:16:16,312 --> 00:16:19,490 And i would look at the beautiful apartment buildings 322 00:16:19,553 --> 00:16:23,525 Across the river, and i- I would imagine this great life 323 00:16:23,590 --> 00:16:27,656 That i might have someday actually living in one of them, you know, 324 00:16:27,721 --> 00:16:31,247 With a great job as a fashion designer for sergio valente 325 00:16:31,312 --> 00:16:35,412 Or goin' to studio 54 every night. 326 00:16:36,777 --> 00:16:38,554 God, i'm old. 327 00:16:40,394 --> 00:16:43,318 But then i grew up, and reality set in, 328 00:16:43,382 --> 00:16:45,892 And the dream got put away. 329 00:16:45,956 --> 00:16:48,339 And then i met you, 330 00:16:48,403 --> 00:16:50,929 And i was- 331 00:16:50,994 --> 00:16:54,775 I was happy in a whole... 332 00:16:54,839 --> 00:16:58,190 New way i just- I never imagined. 333 00:17:01,334 --> 00:17:03,052 I mean, i was... 334 00:17:05,117 --> 00:17:09,755 In that apartment, I mean, i guess just dreams stick with you, because... 335 00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:15,729 I just-I felt like carrie again, you know, 336 00:17:15,794 --> 00:17:21,705 little carrie finally having the thing she wanted back then, and... 337 00:17:21,769 --> 00:17:25,042 At the moment i should have given it up, i- 338 00:17:26,005 --> 00:17:28,579 I couldn't, you know, because it was like... 339 00:17:28,644 --> 00:17:30,804 I was taking something away from her. 340 00:17:30,869 --> 00:17:33,505 You know, does that make any sense, doug? 341 00:17:33,570 --> 00:17:34,380 Yeah. 342 00:17:37,124 --> 00:17:41,285 It's funny to hear you say that, 343 00:17:41,350 --> 00:17:43,256 'Cause all these years, 344 00:17:43,319 --> 00:17:46,497 Even when things were good with us, 345 00:17:46,561 --> 00:17:49,433 I just still sensed there was something... 346 00:17:49,798 --> 00:17:52,116 Pulling you away from me, 347 00:17:52,180 --> 00:17:55,294 You know, like this little voice inside saying, 348 00:17:55,360 --> 00:17:57,201 "Wanna be in manhattan. 349 00:17:57,267 --> 00:18:00,157 I wanna be in manhattan." 350 00:18:00,222 --> 00:18:02,699 Plus, you said it out loud a lot. 351 00:18:05,259 --> 00:18:06,957 I di-I did. 352 00:18:07,022 --> 00:18:09,628 I did hear that voice every day. 353 00:18:09,692 --> 00:18:12,885 And now i just hear her, her voice saying... 354 00:18:15,381 --> 00:18:17,829 Whatever chinese babies say, and- 355 00:18:22,681 --> 00:18:24,842 And I want her. 356 00:18:24,907 --> 00:18:28,116 And i-I want you. 357 00:18:28,180 --> 00:18:32,580 And i-I wish that we could just put this all behind us, you know, 358 00:18:32,644 --> 00:18:35,377 And just be a family. 359 00:18:38,287 --> 00:18:40,224 I love you, Carrie. 360 00:18:40,289 --> 00:18:42,353 I love you, too. 361 00:18:46,905 --> 00:18:48,494 Oh, god. 362 00:18:48,558 --> 00:18:51,353 No, he's gotta get up. He's gotta get up. 363 00:18:58,171 --> 00:19:00,426 Hi, Ming Mei. 364 00:19:00,491 --> 00:19:03,398 Ming Mei Heffernan. 365 00:19:03,462 --> 00:19:04,604 You know what? 366 00:19:04,669 --> 00:19:06,893 It works. 367 00:19:06,958 --> 00:19:08,627 Come on, honey. We gotta go to the airport. 368 00:19:08,691 --> 00:19:09,992 Just a second. 369 00:19:10,057 --> 00:19:12,995 Mommy and I are gonna take you back home to queens. 370 00:19:13,060 --> 00:19:14,934 You're gonna love queens. 371 00:19:14,999 --> 00:19:16,745 Queens has got the new york mets. 372 00:19:16,809 --> 00:19:17,906 It's got- 373 00:19:18,019 --> 00:19:20,273 Well, not a lot else, actually. 374 00:19:20,337 --> 00:19:23,578 Used to have pastrami king, but they shut that down. 375 00:19:23,643 --> 00:19:25,103 Now it's a bookstore. 376 00:19:25,968 --> 00:19:28,573 Tell you, the world is a crazy place. 377 00:19:29,401 --> 00:19:32,912 Ooh. She smiled at me. 378 00:19:32,976 --> 00:19:34,564 Either that, or she's poopin'. 379 00:19:34,627 --> 00:19:37,138 Or maybe both. Maybe she just really enjoys- 380 00:19:37,203 --> 00:19:38,632 I'm pregnant. 381 00:19:39,397 --> 00:19:41,859 Pooping. 382 00:19:41,923 --> 00:19:42,907 What? 383 00:19:42,924 --> 00:19:45,211 Yeah. I haven't felt well since we landed, 384 00:19:45,276 --> 00:19:47,055 And i bought a pregnancy test 385 00:19:47,119 --> 00:19:49,216 In the drug store in the lobby, 386 00:19:49,279 --> 00:19:51,377 And we're gonna have a baby. 387 00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:55,071 Well, what do we do with this one? 388 00:19:56,375 --> 00:19:58,012 I don't know. 389 00:19:58,076 --> 00:20:00,505 I think i'm having an anxiety attack. 390 00:20:00,570 --> 00:20:02,206 C- Calm down. A- Are you sure? 391 00:20:02,271 --> 00:20:04,304 Yes, i am sure. 392 00:20:04,367 --> 00:20:05,734 I mean, look. 393 00:20:05,798 --> 00:20:09,228 Wh-What means pregnant, the monkey or the dragon? 394 00:20:09,293 --> 00:20:10,326 That's just decorative. 395 00:20:10,391 --> 00:20:12,328 Look, it came out blue. That means i'm pregnant. 396 00:20:12,393 --> 00:20:14,234 It must have happened in the apartment that night. 397 00:20:14,299 --> 00:20:15,807 Oh, my god. Oh, my god. Oh, my god. 398 00:20:15,872 --> 00:20:17,381 I thought the doctor said you couldn't get pregnant. 399 00:20:17,446 --> 00:20:19,732 No, she said we probably couldn't. It happens all the time. 400 00:20:19,797 --> 00:20:22,053 When couples don't think they can get pregnant, they stop trying, 401 00:20:22,118 --> 00:20:24,023 And then they adopt a baby and - Oh, god. 402 00:20:24,088 --> 00:20:25,501 Carrie, you have to calm down. 403 00:20:25,566 --> 00:20:27,026 I can't calm down, doug. 404 00:20:27,091 --> 00:20:28,758 Yesterday i had no husband, no baby, 405 00:20:28,822 --> 00:20:32,475 And today i have a husband and 2 babies, and i'm in china. 406 00:20:32,540 --> 00:20:34,701 That's a lot of change for one day. 407 00:20:35,465 --> 00:20:36,958 What are we gonna do? 408 00:20:37,723 --> 00:20:39,772 I- I'll tell you what we're gonna do. 409 00:20:39,836 --> 00:20:41,408 We're gonna fly home today, 410 00:20:41,472 --> 00:20:44,269 And we're gonna start our new life as parents 411 00:20:44,333 --> 00:20:47,955 Of 2 beautiful, wonderful children... 412 00:20:48,820 --> 00:20:51,536 With very different-Shaped eyes. 413 00:20:53,190 --> 00:20:54,776 Everything's gonna be fine. 414 00:20:54,841 --> 00:20:56,907 T- Trust me. 415 00:20:56,970 --> 00:20:59,163 Everything's gonna be fine. 416 00:21:06,049 --> 00:21:06,969 Ming Mei. Ming Mei. 417 00:21:07,034 --> 00:21:08,114 It's ok. Ohh. 418 00:21:08,179 --> 00:21:09,354 It's all right, baby. Calm down. 419 00:21:09,418 --> 00:21:10,705 It's all right, baby. 420 00:21:10,769 --> 00:21:11,848 All right. 421 00:21:11,913 --> 00:21:13,151 No, i know- 422 00:21:13,215 --> 00:21:14,836 There you go. Good girl. 423 00:21:16,700 --> 00:21:18,600 It didn't work out. 28418

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