All language subtitles for The.nanny.S06E20.DVDRip.English-WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

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Good afternoon,
my beautiful darling.

Good afternoon, my sweet angel.

- Oh. Well, she's not here?
- No.

Blimey, ever since
she entered her 3rd

trimester, her mood
swings have been lethal.

Oh, I know. It's worse than
when Sylvia gave up chocolate.

That was the most
unbearable hour of my life.

Oh, here you guys are.
Are you hiding from me?

No!

Oh, good. Because I have a little
surprise for our new college man.

Oh, it's just so exciting!

- It's just Harvard, Fran.
- Oh no, I mean the cake.

The interior is pudding.

My son, the Harvard man, eh?
Takes me back to my Eton days.

Oh, takes me back
to my eating disorders.

I thought tonight, for a celebratory
dinner I would make salmon.

Oh, no!
Those poor little salmon,

they spend their whole lives swimming
upstream just to be poached for dinner?

I was going to barbeque.

Oh? Mesquite?

With a teriyaki glaze? That would be
perfect for Brighton's celebratory dinner!

Oh, my baby is leaving.

Who put that finger in the cake?

You did.

Oh. Well aren't we a bunch
of moody musketeers?

Oh, well, I better get to work.

Uh, but before I go, darling, I just
wanted to tell you, you are beautiful.

You're thin, you're 29, and oh,
the skin on the back of your hand

just snaps right back like a
rubber band when you pinch it!

Oh, isn't he wonderful?
I love him so much,

and we are so proud of our
son getting into Harvard.

Uh, Fran? I've decided I
don't want to go to college.

Why?

Well, it's just that I
don't want to have tests.

I don't want to have responsibilities.
I just want a year off.

That's okay, honey. If you
don't want to go to college,

we're not going to make you go.

There's plenty of people in my family
that chose not to go to college.

Really?

Yeah, well it seemed
like a natural choice

after they chose
not to finish high school.

So you're really cool with
me not going to Harvard?

I'm totally fine. It's not
a problem. Come sit down, baby.

We're going to have some cake.

Now maybe I'll give you the
piece that says, "Harvard!"

Hi, Fran. Bye, Fran.

♪ She was working in a bridal
shop in Flushing, Queens ♪

♪ Till her boyfriend kicked her out
in one of those crushing scenes ♪

♪ What was she to do, where was she
to go, she was out on her fanny ♪

♪ So over the bridge from Flushing
to the Sheffield's door ♪

♪ She was there to sell makeup,
but the father saw more ♪

♪ She had style, she had flair, she was
there, that's how she became the Nanny ♪

♪ Who would have guessed
that the girl we described ♪

♪ Was just exactly
what the doctor prescribed? ♪

♪ Now, the father finds her
beguiling, watch out, C.C. ♪

♪ And the kids are actually
smiling such joie de vivre ♪

♪ She's the lady in red when
everybody else is wearing tan ♪

♪ The flashy girl from Flushing,
the Nanny named Fran ♪

This is going to
last you three weeks.

I just love getting pampered.

I feel like a regular
Princess Caroline in the city.

Yeah... Oh, excuse me, could
you give me that magazine?

See, my nails are still wet.

Oh, B, thanks so much for bringing us. You
know, you can't drive with wet nails.

That is so weird.

I wonder how that happened.

So anyway, Fran. I was
thinking what we would do...

What?

No, when we get home, what we're
going to do is we have to...

- What?
- Oh, Fran!

What I said was
when we get home,

we have to make sure we talk to dad
about me not going to Harvard.

Oh, honey, what do you think I'm
getting all beautiful out here for?

I want to look pretty when I tell him the
horrible news. I can't run like I used to.

Would you like me
to exfoliate you?

Should this be exciting to me?

If you like a woman scraping
dead skin cells off your face.

Uh, so she does touch me.
Oh, yeah.

- Uh, Fran?
- What?

I leaned on my wet nails,
and I got it all over my face.

- Oh, honey...
- Oh, I'm so stupid.

You know, next time
you gotta remind me.

Use flesh-colored nail-polish.

Hey? Any of you want
your tea leaves read?

- Oh, I had a cup of Sanka.
- I can read that too.

Since when are you a psychic?

Since when do you need
to know my business?

Well I'm sorry, Libby. I just didn't
know you were a fortuneteller.

Are you calling me a liar?

- Libby!
- Could you do my cup?

Yeah, sure. Oh... never mind,
that's raisin bagel.

I am seeing two people
very much in love.

I am also seeing
a very happy marriage.

Ooh! To who?

- I'm getting an F.
- As in, pharmacist?

Val, pharmacist
begins with a P, honey.

Yes, but his name is Fred,

and that begins
with an F. Doesn't it?

Oh, Val, remember when we
were at the pharmacy

the other day getting tweezers,
Fred kept staring at you?

And we thought that it was because you
had that Q-tip stuck in your rear.

But baby, it was love!

I am also getting a semi-attached
condo villa in phase 4.

- And lots of babies.
- Oh! You're going to have sex.

What about me, what about me?

My psychic powers tell
me you already had sex.

- No, do me, do me!
- I don't do diet soda!

Come on, what am I, a quack? Sit
down and give me your palm.

Okay.

All right.
What have we got here?

Libby: I see you very happy
with your three new kids.

Libby: No, no, no, wait.
Make that two.

Libby: Things look really
good for you. Uh-oh.

Fran:
Uh-oh? What's with the uh-oh?

I see your husband with
a sexy blond with great legs.

I'm going to go blonde?

Ain't you.

Who is it? What's my husband
doing with a leggy blond?

With piercing blue eyes.

Um... I'm seeing Beverly Hills.

I'm seeing them in bed together,

their arms wrapped
around each other.

Ooh.

Well, don't you see
anything good in this hand?

Your skin snaps back
like a rubber band.

Darling, don't be ridiculous.

What does that no-good
yenta gypsy psychic know?

My future.

She said Maxwell's going to have
an affair with a leggy blonde.

Oh, my God! You think it's me?

Ma!

I'm sorry, but since
I lost the weight,

your husband has been
giving me the eye.

Oh, he's just in shock at
how big your head looks, now.

Thank you. Ma, she saw them
kissing in Beverly Hills.

We can't move to California.

Although, on the upside, when
you get a divorce in California

you get half of everything.

Particularly if he leaves you
for someone who's younger.

Ma, she didn't say younger.

What, he's going to leave
you for someone older?

Big head!

Darling, you're putting your faith
in a woman who sweeps up hair

at the Chatterbox.

I don't know about
that place anymore.

The last time I had
my hair done there,

when I got home I pulled out the two
"Reader's Digest" I stuffed in my blouse,

from 1994.

I was almost too embarrassed to
put them on my cocktail table.

That story disturbs
me on so many levels.

All I'm saying is you are
overreacting to that shyster Libby

and her voodoo.

Mm, maybe you're right.

I mean, she said that Val was going to
get married, and there's no way that...

- Val: Hi, Fran!
- Val!

The psychic was right, Fran,
you know Fred the pharmacist?

- Yeah. Hi, Fred.
- We're dating.

Hi, Fran Sheffield. How's
your welt? Did it pustulate?

It was a small, red mark.

No, it's like an egg clair
was sitting in there.

When did you two start dating?

Today. But I loved her from
the first time I saw her,

standing catty-cornered
at the Metamucil display.

You know, the orange-flavored
laxatives you buy, Fran Sheffield?

Shh!

Ma, Ma, my life is over.

The psychic was right about Val,

and she's right about me.

Oh, darling, you're not thinking
straight. You're too wound up.

What psychic wouldn't
predict that dumb

and dumber would
eventually find each other?

This is one boring baby shower.

Yetta, Fran's baby
shower is next week.

Oy, I can't believe I missed it!

Can I at lease see the baby?

Whoa!

Look at you walking already.

Oh! You're going to
be way too big

for these Oshkosh B'gosh.

Oh, Niles,

how am I going to figure out who
my husband is leaving me for?

He's not leaving you for... why don't you
go back to the psychic and ask for details?

Like a name.

I can't. They fired her.

Do you know that she predicted $138 would
be missing from the cash register?

What she neglected to predict was that
they would search through her purse.

- Oh, why is he straying?
- Oh, he's not straying.

Believe me, if he didn't leave when he
met your mother, he ain't going nowhere.

Great news! The network called, and
they decided to pick up my pilot.

Yeah, and they want me
there for the announcement

tomorrow at the
Beverly Hills Hotel.

Oh, God.
Is that in Beverly Hills?

Oh, sweetheart, don't worry.
I'll only be gone a few days.

Don't leave me.

I'm begging you.
Think of the twins. The twins.

Darling, I'm not leaving you.

I love you.
I'll call you tonight.

Oh, God, Niles, this is it! My
worst fears are being realized!

He's going to wind up in the arms
of a sexy, blue-eyed blonde!

All right, so the psychic was right about
Val, but you have nothing to worry about.

He's not going to be
with some sexy blue-eyed

blonde in Beverly Hills.
He's going to be with...

Maxwell, did you get my carrier?

- Miss Babcock.
- Miss Babcock.

I don't understand.
Why would she leave me for him?

What I don't understand is
why he would leave me for her.

( Imitating Fran's voice )
I don't know.

I knew it was
too good to be true.

I was finally getting me some,
and he took me some away.

You know, I'm sorry, I mean
I know I am not blonde,

but I'm kind of leggy.

Aren't I? I can't see anymore.

Well, I don't know about you, but I am
not going to take this sitting down.

What are we going to do?
Follow them to California?

Listen to me, listening
to you and this silly psychic.

This is ridiculous.
Your hormones are going crazy.

Your mood swings
are all over the place.

Your ankles are so swollen
you can't even...

Oh, my God. He is
going to leave you for her.

Well, that does it.
We're going to California.

And I'm packing something really cute
so she'll like me better than him.

Oh, I'll take one of his suits.

Gee, do you think that if I
find a really good push-up bra,

I could pass
the twins off as cleavage?

Uh, excuse me,
I'm Mrs. Maxwell Sheffield.

I lost my key and I need a new
one to get into our room.

Do you have proof
that you're his wife?

Uh, hello.

Very subtly look over your left
shoulder, and tell me if that's...

Hello, I'm Fran Drescher,
I'm checking in.

Nails, nails, nails.

Hi. Excuse me,
Miss Fran Drescher,

but I am your biggest fan.

Oh, thank you.

My God,
you really do talk like that.

Who would make this up?

( laughs )

So I see you're into
the flat hair in real life.

Yeah, it's not for you.

You think it makes me look fat?

You know, the bigger the hair,
the smaller the hips.

She learned that from your show.

Tell me something, what's the butler like?
Is he as funny in person?

I think he steals
the whole show.

Can I interject? I thought
you were so fabulous

in "My Cousin Vinny."

Where do you keep your Oscar?

Uh, at Marisa Tomei's house.

Are you two here on vacation?

Oh, no, we're here spying on her husband
who's having an affair with my girlfriend.

We did that very same
story this season.

Really? I didn't see that.
When was it on?

Now. And don't forget to watch
the series finale next week.

Oh, I wouldn't
miss it for the world!

Unless, of course, that's
the night I'm having my twins.

Oh, look at him. All by himself.

I feel like such an idiot.

Oh, that Niles.

So paranoid.

Honey? Honey?

( Screams )

What the hell are
you doing in my bed?

What the heck are you
doing in my husband's bed?

Oh, I can't believe this.
The psychic was right.

How can he do this to me after
all we've been through to...

Meanwhile, where the hell is he?

We switched rooms.
Chester likes a terrace.

Oh, really?
Well, where is little Chester?

Oh, I left him with Max. Sometimes
that dog can be a pain in the ass.

- Why did you bring him?
- Because he's my baby.

This is so weird. I mean,
the psychic told me that

Maxwell's going to end up in bed with a
sexy, blue-eyed blond in California.

Your psychic thinks I'm sexy?

Something's wrong here.

I mean, besides the fact that I just flew
3,000 miles to end up in bed with you.

Nanny Fine, I can understand how you
might not trust me with Maxwell.

After all, there were
years of unrequited love

and unfulfilled fantasies and...

oh, shameless come-ons.

But eventually, he came to see that he
didn't have a chance in hell with me.

So I'm guessing it's only
food left in the minibar.

Nanny Fine, you have
nothing to worry about.

I found my man,

and I am completely and totally,

and multiply satisfied.

Really?

That is the joy of being
with a man who lives

to serve others, baby.

Oh!

( Both laugh )

Somebody needs a waxing.

Let go.

You are not in Hollywood two
minutes, and look at you already!

Would you mind telling me what the
heck the two of you are doing in here?

My psychic saw you
in Beverly Hills in bed,

wrapped in the arms
of a leggy blue-eyed blond.

- (gasps ) It's you!
- It's me!

Oh, thank God.

Your psychic thinks I'm leggy?

Get out.

You know, it wouldn't kill
you to clip your toenails.

Honey, honey,
oh, it's a funny coincidence.

I love California.

What do you think of it? I find it
arid, my hair doesn't get as frizzy...

You flew 3,000 miles

because some silly psychic told you
I was about to have an affair?

Well, she wasn't totally wrong. You were
in bed with a leggy blue-eyed blond.

He scrubs my toilets.

I'm sorry, honey,
I know that Libby was wrong,

but if a sexy blue-eyed blonde
woman did come onto you,

you would tell her that you're
madly in love with your big,

fat, miserable,
moody wife, wouldn't you?

Well, of course I would.

You'd tell her I was fat?

Well, it's just... you know.

Pregnant describes it.
Fat I don't get.

I'm not fat, technically.

Um, Dad, you remember
that time in your life

when you wanted to take some time
off before you went to college?

No.

That's where we differ.

Just what exactly are
you trying to tell me?

That you don't want
to go to college?

Yeah. Uh, I think I need to take some
time off to figure out who I am.

You're Brighton Sheffield,
Harvard freshman.

There. Now you know.
See you spring break.

- I really need to do this.
- Absolutely not!

Come on, dad,
what did your father say

when you told him you
wanted to get into theater?

- Absolutely not.
- And did you listen to him?

Absolutely... not.
But I still went to college.

Yeah, well I'm not saying
I'm never going to go.

I just want a year off to travel. I
want to backpack through Germany.

I want to see the ancient city of Rome.
I want to go to Paris and...

eat cheese.

How do you propose
to pay for this cheese?

- Well, I can get a job.
- Oh, really?

And how do you propose to do that when
you don't even speak the language?

You're going to do mime
on the streets of Paris?

You see how good I am?
You got it like that!

Oh, my God! Did you know this?

Did you know your son
isn't going to Harvard?

- No.
- Well, sure you did, Fran.

Come on, sweetie,
let's talk about this.

I know that you're upset,
but listen, he's just a kid.

What do you want him to do 20 years from
now? Look back on this time with regret?

Yes.

I just don't want him
to make a mistake.

But that will be his mistake.

Look, didn't a lot of people say you
were making a mistake when you hired me?

But that turned
out good, didn't it?

It turned out good, didn't it?

Well, yes, of course it did.

Beyond my wildest dreams.

Sweetie, he'll be fine.
He's a smart boy.

He's got a good head
on his shoulders.

Would you happen to know
exactly what size that head is?

- Why?
- Well, when he was

going to Harvard, I was going
to show him my support

by buying him a Porsche.

Now I suppose I'll have to buy him one of
those berets with a funny ball on top.

Oh, sweetie.

So tell me, where do you
see me 20 years from now?

I see you with
a man in New York.

And this... this young guy
in Paris.

And a jazz saxophonist
in Chicago.

That sounds good.

Are you an organ donor?

( Jazz music playing )