All language subtitles for Paris and Nico .S01E01.1080p.WEB.h264-EDITH_track3_[eng]

I missed you, Bill.

Missed you, Sill.

Yaas. Heh.

NICOLE:
Love you, you little bitch.

PARIS:
Love you, bitch.

NARRATOR 1:
It's been 20 years
since the world

watched two reality TV icons

take on all the complexities
of...a simple life.

Now, Paris and Nicole
are reuniting

for the next big endeavor...

This is major.

...to commemorate
their lifelong friendship

and the show
that made them famous.

I'll do gas.

No, I don't know
how to wipe windshields.

I'm-- I'm wearing
a white coat.

I don't know how either.
I love you, girls.

That's hot.
That's hot.

That's really hot.

You guys [BLEEP]ing rock.

And they'll use
the only possibly medium

that can capture the gravity
of this moment.

We decided to turn our famous
song "Sanasa" into an opera.

What?
Excuse me?

When you think about Nicole
Richie and Paris Hilton,

you don't go to opera.

You don't?

And in order
to write their magnum opus,

they must first
revisit their past.

Your bartenders are here!

Hi!
Good lord!

I tried to get you
a self-care vibrator,

but they didn't sell them.

So buckle up
for what is sure to be

an unforgettable experience.

That is...
if they can pull it off.

How long until we can put
a red carpet over this?

Break a leg.

Okay, is everybody
good and ready?

Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie,

so here you are for a reunion.
Incredible.

DUNCAN:
Why are you doing
a reunion now?

What is the story
that made this happen?

It's the 20-year anniversary
of The Simple Life,

which was such
a special part of our life,

and the fans have been
wanting it for so long.

I just thought
it was perfect timing.

I am going crazy

waiting for
The Simple Lifereunion.

Like, Paris and Nicole
raised me.

Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie,
they are teasing us, bitch.

[SPEAKS IN SPANISH]

[IN ENGLISH]
I just said, "Please, God,
let this be true."

We got together in person
in January.

I had not seen The Simple Life
since I shot it,

and Paris, she'll tell you,
she's-- She's watched it.

So she was like, "You have to,
like, see some episodes that--

That we did." So we did that.
We ate tacos.

So fun.
And I think it--

It just felt natural
and felt right

that we have a moment
to celebrate it.

We were just, like, not even
talking about the show per se

and that like, "Oh, we want
to shoot a reunion."

Like, we were like, "Oh, my God,
like, truly, what a time."

You know? Just, like,
having a moment between us

that we were really able

to appreciate that
that was 20 years ago.

NARRATOR 2:
The time has finally come
for these city slickers

to give up the glitz
and head for the heartland.

[SCREAMING]

So not doing that.

Ugh! You bitch!

Nicole!

We really did experience
America in a way

that we hadn't
or never would again.

DUNCAN:
Where did the idea of an opera
come from? Why an opera?

Could be crazy.
We were throwing out

a bunch of different ideas,

and we were like,
"Should we make this an opera?"

[BOTH LAUGH]

It's so random, it's perfect.

Yeah. Exactly.
Mm.

I also think it's very us
to dive into a world

that we don't know
anything about.

Like, that is kind of on theme
with what we did,

even when we shot
The Simple Life.

Now, what do you mean
an opera?

Do you mean,
like, Madame Butterfly

and La Traviata?

Yeah, like those.

What are those?

[BOTH LAUGHING]

As it tends to do,
it started out as a joke

and then it became...serious.

[***]

NARRATOR 1:
If Paris and Nicole are serious
about making history,

they'll need to roll up
their sleeves and get working.

[SQUEALING]

Hi, gorgeous!

Which, for them, means brunch.

Oh, my God. Should we sit?
Yes, please.

PARIS:
We wanted to meet with
The Simple Life producers

just to reminisce
and just hear all of the stories

about where it all began
from their perspective.

This got me
watching back episodes,

and, like, I was
laughing out loud.

It was really fun
to watch old episodes again.

I haven't seen it at all until
when we were gonna do this.

I watch it
all the time.

[ALL LAUGHING]

It's the only show I watch.
[LAUGHS]

I think of both of you
very differently.

Nicole Richie, I truly think
you're a brilliant comic.

NICOLE: Thank you.
Truly. And I think Paris--

My parent's generation
had Marilyn Monroe.

You are that icon.

Thank you.
You are.

ROSS:
Do you guys have episodes,

or like, the ones
you remember fondly?

Season 1 was so special
because we were in Arkansas,

and it was just, like, truly
an experiment for everybody.

I feel like we were all
doing this thing together

for the first time,
and, like, no--

Truly, no one knew
what they were doing, like--

And so we were just like, in it.
Truly.

And Jeff really wanted you guys
to, like, live the real stuff.

We did, didn't we?
You guys did.

'Cause you guys arrived
on a jet, right?

Took that
rattle-trap pick-up...

PARIS & NICOLE: Yes.
...to the farm.

Moved into your horrible
bedroom with one bed.

The first morning,
your new day at the farm,

Paris came outside the
Leding house almost in tears,

saying, "We're going home."

[LAUGHTER]
Morning one.

I'm, like, "Oh, okay.
What's going on?"

"There are no closets.
There's nothing.

There's not a dresser,

there's not a chair
in our bedroom."

I said, "If we get you
a rolling rack, will you stay?"

"Yes, if you get me
a rolling rack, I will stay."

And a mirror.

And a mirror!
That's right. You remember.

I do think that
we deserved a mirror.

DUNCAN:
Tell me a story nobody knows.

On The Simple Life,
what's something that--

That I don't know?

Season 1, I took on the habit
of chewing tobacco.

So gross.
It was so gross.

DUNCAN:
And you never did it on camera?
It was all off camera?

Yeah, it was all off camera.
PARIS: Yeah.

Wh-- When in Rome.
It was very wh--

You did it too
a few times.

Yeah, but I hated it too.
Yeah. Yeah.

It's crazy to think
what we got away with.

Mm-hm.
Totally.

Do you know I have
an arrest warrant,

uh, in New Jersey?

Wait, I do know. Yes.
For the cop car.

For your stealing
a cop car.

For real. For real.
[LAUGHTER]

Wait, I thought
I crashed a car.

You did that too.
You crashed a car.

NICOLE:
Oh.

Oh! Whoa, whoa.

You crashed two cars and then
there was a police car there

getting an oil change,
and you took the car,

turned on the sirens and went
to get Paris some nail polish.

And I got
an arrest warrant.

[SPEAKS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

NICOLE: Where's a mini mall?
Where's the car?

[NICOLE GIGGLING]
MAN: Hey.

Hey, where are you going
with this car?

Hey! No, you can't do that.

But did you think
it was part of the filming

and that it was
set there on purpose?

Honestly, I think you guys
did such an amazing job

at protecting us
that I just felt like

everything was just
gonna be okay.

PARIS: Do anything.
He goes to jail, not you.

[LAUGHTER]

When we did that show in Texas,

I think, and you were
on the horse...

Mm-hm.
You got thrown from a horse.

Yeah, that was crazy.

Aah! Oh, my God,
oh, my God, oh, my God.

Tell him to stop,
tell him to stop.
Oh, oh.

Oh!

You did
your own stunts.

When do you do that in a show,
you know?

She's the Tom Cruise
of reality TV.

What else are you guys doing
for your reunion?

Basically, we were like,
"How do we celebrate

this very cool show
that we did?"

So we decided to turn it
into an opera.

[OPERA PLAYING]

Amazing.
For real?

NICOLE: Yeah.
An opera?

Yeah.

I can't wait to see it.

Yeah.

That sounds terrible.

It sounds like a disaster
waiting to happen.

Fantastic.

Cheers, guys.
Thank you, guys,

for coming and sitting with us.
Thanks for having us.

[***]

Welcome to SlivAir.

Love it.

Tell me a bit
about why you wanted

to go back to Arkansas

for this reunion
that you're planning.

Well, we did want
to be inspired,

but I also just felt
like it was important

to really go back and look at it
with true adult eyes.

PARIS:
I just can't imagine us
not going back there

and seeing all the people that

we had this
amazing experience with,

and I really wanted
to visit the Ledings.

Have you girls ever been

to any of this part
of the country before?

I only travel, like, to Europe
or L.A. or New York. Yeah.

They were just so kind and
opening up their home to us.

I just can't imagine
living in a big city.

See, I could never imagine
living here.

I couldn't--
I couldn't either.

I would die.

I would never
let two 20-year-olds

in my house for a month.
I know. Can you imagine?

NICOLE:
It is a lot with,
like, cameras in your face.

Regardless of that,
I do just want to see them.

We spent a month
in their house.

NARRATOR 1:
As Paris and Nicole

touch down in balmy Arkansas...

Okay, here we go.

We're back.
Yes.

...they're eager to reconnect
with the small Southern town

that helped make them
huge stars.

It's so damn hot.
It's so hot.

But is tiny Altus
ready for a reunion?

[MOOS]

[***]

Traveling is the best thing
that someone gets to do.

And we got to do that
in, like, our own fun way.

And it's like,
the best home videos

that we can watch
the rest of our lives,

even though you hate
watching yourself.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

But you can make other people
happy through it. It's...

Yeah.

And I've seen that even so much

in the past few months

since people saw
that we were doing this.

Just so many fans
reaching out

and just saying how much
the show meant to them.

Anytime that I was having
a bad mental health day,

my mom would let stay home,
and we would lay in bed all day

and just watch
The Simple Life,

and that would
always make me feel better.

Getting to see you all live
your lives that authentically

was an inspiration, and it
gave me a means and a purpose

to try to start doing the same,

and I cannot thank you all
enough for that.

NARRATOR 1:
Before dropping in
on old friends,

good manners dictates one
brings a small token or gift.

Luckily, Paris knows just
the tiny specialty gift shop.

[***]

Oh, my God.

So hot.

Okay, wait, how do I control--

Oh, my God.

It's more fun.

Oh, my God.

Hello.
Hi.

Did you all come to shop?
Yes.

Some gifts for some old friends
that we're gonna see.

I can't believe
that y'all are here.

These are our old
stomping grounds.

This was our favorite store.

Walmart was the one place
that we would always shop at

when we were living in Arkansas.

Do you guys hang out
at Walmart?
Heh. What?

I've always heard that people
hang out at Walmart.

Why?
I don't know.

What is Walmart?

Is it, like,
they sell wall stuff?

I now know that Walmart
doesn't sell walls,

they sell
Paris Hilton cookware.

[LAUGHS]
Yeah.

Full circle moment.

I think we found just the thing.
This.

Okay, we need these.

Yeah.
Gold one, pink one.

Yeah.
Some "That's Hot" mugs.

Yeah.
Some ice cream makers.

Absolutely.

Mini casserole dish.

One hundred percent.
That's hot.

Oh, waffle maker.

For sure.
Cute.

NARRATOR 1:
It is clear that
Paris and Nicole

are not gifted in keeping
a low profile department.

And so, it's not a surprise
that eager local fans

begin to besiege them.
Oh, toys.

Hey, queens.

Love you.

Won't that be cute?

Oh, yeah, for Buff.

We need... this.

Pantaloons too.

This is 2-XL.
Is there more than that?

DUNCAN:
Paris, from what I'm seeing,

you're more sentimental
than you.

Nostalgic. You know
what I mean? Am I wrong?

No, I think you're right, yes.

It's not to say you're not
sentimental 'cause, I see--

No, I-- I know what you mean.
I'm a cold bitch, yeah.

[LAUGHTER]

You have no feelings.
Yeah, I got it.

I got exactly
what you were saying.

Hello.

Do you guys wanna do
a group picture?

Because we can do that.
ALL: Yeah.

[SQUEALING]

We're coming back
to go visit everyone in Altus.

I live in Altus.

You live there?
You do?

Do you know the mayor?
Mm-hm. She's my aunt.

Really? We love your aunt.
We're seeing her tomorrow.

Aunt Veronica.

[LAUGHTER]

Yes, that's so cute.

Simple Lifefans are so sweet.

So sweet.

Loves it.

Hi. Oh, my God. Amie.
Hi, Amie.

I connected with Paris
through my video.

Watching you two,
your relationship

and how you would
just be silly,

dress however you wanted,

really shaped
the core of my personality.

I would get dressed up
and wear heels

and go shopping at Walmart,

and I didn't care
what people thought.

* Sanasa, Sanasa *

NICOLE:
It's such a pleasure
to meet you.

It really is.
It's a pleasure to meet you.

Thank you for sending in
that video.

It was so special,
and we felt how earnest it was.

Aw, I'm gonna cry.
Yeah, it was beautiful.

We were watching
and we were like:

"Oh, my God,
we have to meet her."

Do you want to help us
do some shopping?

Yes.
Okay, so the mayor of Altus,

unfortunately, we heard,
had a ziplining accident

about a year ago,
so I was thinking

about getting her a vibrator.

[LAUGHS]

They sell those here,
I would imagine, right?

I don't think they sell
vibrators here.

They don't?
Oh, my God.

No. They sell massage--
Neck massagers.

That you could
really put anywhere.

It vibrates.

I think anything that has
an on and off button will do.

I love that.
Yes.

* Sanasa, Sanasa
Sanasasa, Sanasa *

Can you define for me "sanasa"?
What is "sanasa"?

"Sanasa" is a song
that Paris and I wrote.

We were kids.

It's a song,
but it's also a vibe check.

DUNCAN:
So on The Simple Life,

was a planned thing or did you
just like, check in?

How did that go?
That was us trying to, like,

communicate with each other,
but truly, I promise you,

never thinking that, like,
it would make the actual show.

* Sanasa *
* Sanasa *

[IN UNISON]
* Sanasa, sanasa *

MAN: Girls, come here, please.
* Sanasa, sanasa *

[IN UNISON]
* Sanasa, sanasa *

* Sanasa! *

It's a feeling
of happiness and joy,

which Nicole and I like
to sprinkle around the world,

and we've been doing that
since we're 2.

Yeah.

Bye.
Bye.

NARRATOR 1:
Armed with cookware, camouflage

and the best chain store
vibrator money can buy,

Paris and Nicole are ready
for their Arkansas reunion.

[***]

Look, "Welcome to Altus."

PARIS:
Oh, my God, we're here.

Oh, we should have gotten
a video of the sign.

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

Hello.

I love your blonde hair.
You look beautiful.

Thank you.
Hi, so good to see you.

Hi.

You're just as lovely as ever.
So beautiful.

Aw, thank you so much.
So are you.

Veronica is the mayor.

How has she been the mayor
20-something years?

She's very good at her job,
apparently.

Isn't it like, four years,
or is that only presidents?

I mean, she's doing a good job.

I was just really nervous
that people were going to be

still mad at us 20 years later.

Have a good trip? Oh, good. Wow.
We did. It's nice to be back.

This, I wanted
to briefly tell you--

This is just a, um--
It's a posture brace,

but I broke my neck
in eight places--

Ziplining, right?

Yeah. But it was a home zipline.
Ow.

So it wasn't a,
you know, professional one.

A home ziplining accident?

It's a sex thing.

I have a surprise.
I have your pink truck.
Oh--

Oh, my gosh.
It's a classic.

It is a classic.

[LAUGHS]
Our home away from home.

[FANS CHEERING]

I think we made it prettier.

You gave it a fresh new
coat of paint, that's for sure.

But you can tell your brush
strokes are still there.

You had your touch on it.
We're not Van Gogh.

I know.

Oh, my God!

We've got your street signs.

Let's put them up for the day
just while we're here

so we have our own streets.
Yeah, we can do that.

NICOLE: We've got these gifts.
Oh, my goodness.

You guys didn't have to do that.

This is so very generous
and kind of you.

Heart-shaped knife block.
Your line.

"That's Hot." I love it.
[LAUGHS] Yes.

We got you
this heat massager

that goes on your back
and can help--

Since you had an injury,

we thought that
you might like this.

That's so special.

I just can't wait to use this.

I tried to get you a self-care
vibrator from Walmart,

but they didn't sell them.

That's okay.
This one is perfect.

This is perfect.
This is all I need.

Let's sit down for a minute.

Okay.

So we had some crazy times
when you girls were here before.

You know, that Alligator Ray's
with the pool table.

What happened?

No! Ha-ha! Nicole!

I-- I remember.

We did have to have
the top of that recovered.

Well, I would like
to reimburse you for that,

because it's
the right thing to do, and--

And I hope that it's
better late than never.

That's--
That's a very sweet gesture.

So how are you celebrating
your anniversary

for The Simple Life?
What are you doing?

What we really wanted to do
for the big reunion is an opera.

Whoa.

I was surprised

when they said
they were putting on an opera.

"Shocked" would probably be
the actual word.

I would have to say
I'm really shocked,

because I know how they were
20 years ago,

and I'm thinking, "Are they
really putting on an opera?"

Do you sing?

My husband and I
sing in our church choir.

I mean, if you ever wanna
sing in the opera,

you can do that
as well.

Okay, well, that kinda gives me

something to look forward to.

Yeah.
Okay.

Let's go put your signs up.

Okay.

This is Leon,

who you met
at the kissing booth.

Who wants a kiss?

[SQUEALING LAUGHTER]

Good to see you again.

Nice meeting you.

[***]

We think about you
all the time.

There we go.
Yeah.

Now look right here, please.
Lovely.

Thank you!

Oh, that's-- Hi, Jacquelin.

NARRATOR 1:
Streets named in your honor,
an iconic pose reimagined.

It seems you can go home again.

[HONKS]

And maybe get off the highway
before you become--

What is it the locals say?
Road kill.

[HONKS]

Oh. Beep, beep.

[***]

Like, two minutes.

[LAUGHS]

I'm a little nervous.
Yeah.

NICOLE:
Twenty years is a long time.

It's a long time.

Okay, did you guys
go see the Ledings, or not?

We did go see them, but they
didn't wanna be on camera.

It was really special to go see
Janet and Albert again.

We were just laughing.

By the way, they're doing great.
They look the same, honestly.

Besides, Braxton.

He's now six feet tall.
Braxton does not look the same.

Now do I look pretty?

It was really nice
being able to thank them and--

Honestly, twenty years ago,

we really did come
and plow through that city

like bats out of hell.

Ew. It stinks.

DUNCAN:
I felt like everyone
you went to, "Are you mad?"

NICOLE:
Yeah, I think for Danny,
especially,

because he was
our second job.

DANNY:
Girls. Girls?

Is that him?
Hey, girls, how's it going?

NICOLE [LAUGHING]:
We're good.

He was yelling at us
the whole time,

so we really didn't know...
if he was mad.

Out of all the bosses,
he was, like,

the one I was, like, scared of.

DANNY:
Girls. Girls.

You can't be spilling
that much milk.

I recognize that voice.

This is where we spilled
the milk, right?

Yes, and I got in trouble with
the health department over it.

Really?
Yeah.

Wow, wow, wow.

I've got something here
for you.

Do y'all have any of these?

Oh, my gosh.
Yes.

There's you a present.
Thank you.

Thank you so much.
You're welcome. You're welcome.

Aw.
And our cards.

Yes.
That's so cute.

You have to turn it around.

Have you ever clocked in
anywhere before?

No.
Have you ever had a real job?

No.
Okay.

So you've now clocked in
for the first time ever.

It's hard work.

It would be for y'all.

Yeah.
Mm-hm.

But we did it.
We did it.

Now that's good.

Yeah.
So many fun memories.

This really took us
out of our comfort zones, and--

I knew that.

[LAUGHTER]

So you weren't mad at us?
I'll never forget it.

Hell no, I wasn't mad at you.
Aw.

It was good.
I wouldn't change it.

Even went to Minnesota one time,
and I had to give autographs.

Yes.

Slay, queen.

Okay.

Let's go inside
where it's air conditioned.

Yeah.

This is where we took a nap.
I remember.

Yes.
Yes.

And the jacuzzi.

It's not here anymore.

PARIS:
Oh, really?

I'm sorry that I spilled
so much milk,

so we got you some oat milk.

It's having a real moment
right now.

All right,
thank you much.
Yes.

And we got you
a "best friend" bracelet.

Yeah, we got you
a bestie bracelet.

Okay.
On a scale of one to 10,

how good of employees were we?

Three?

Okay, how-- How--

But you was
the most fun employees.

A 10.
So a 10 for that.

Yeah, a 10 for the most fun.

Back then, they were a handful.

They didn't like to work a lot.

Paris could not stay out
from in front of a camera.

Very good.

And Nicole tried really hard,

but she always
screwed up something.

How were our outfits?

Memorable.

So a 10.
Yes.

What about our hair?

Oh, your hair was great.

Our spray tans?

Very good.
The hot tub was memorable.

Yeah.
[LAUGHS] Yes.
Yes.

DANNY:
Does it bother you
if I work while y'all rest?

We've been working harder
than all of you today.

We'll have to do a hot tub
again soon together.

Okay. Let me know.

[LAUGHS]
Yes.

DANNY:
After 20 years, in my opinion,

the ladies have changed
in a positive way.

They seem
to love life more.

Should we let them all out?

Yes.
[LAUGHS]

[MOOS]

[***]

NICOLE:
Alligator Ray's
was our hang spot.

PARIS:
It's the only bar in town.

Yeah. It was our spot to let
loose and have a good time.

Hi, miss.
Do you have my purse?

Do I have your purse?

You lost your purse?

NICOLE:
Where is it? Someone stole it?

Your bartenders are here!

[CHEERING]

Yeah.

NARRATOR 1:
I can imagine that when Mozart
wrote the Marriage of Figaro,

he must have had a place
like Alligator Ray's

to go for inspiration too.

Hi, Buffy!
Good lord!

We miss you.
Oh, my God.
We miss you so much.

Well, I know
you haven't called me.

What's the damn deal?

We do.
We always talk about you.

We talk about you all the time.
You were our favorite job.

Y'all can come back
and work any time you want.

NICOLE: We want to.
PARIS: Yeah.

We're gonna miss you.
I'm gonna miss y'all.

Yeah. All grown up.

Aw.

It's so good to see you.

Not many girls around here
that I know of at all

as crazy and outspoken as you.

Oh, my God.

You've got a beautiful wife.
Oh, thank you.

So we've got a couple of special
guests in the house tonight.

I'm gonna pass the mic
over to you guys.

Hello, Altus.

[CHEERING]

I notice that a pool table
is not here anymore,

and it's because of me,
so I'm sorry.

No! Nicole!

Nicole and I are so happy
to be back here after 20 years.

So many amazing memories.

We love you all,
and it's good to be back.

[CHEERING]

* Sanasa, sanasa
Sana-sasa, sanasa *

[CHEERING]

I'd say I generally felt
an overall tenderness towards us

from everybody
that we checked back in with.

Paris!
Hi.

I'd say that we really touched
their lives.
Yeah.

We know you love this color.

Camo. I started
to wear camo today.

And I have the same one,
so we can match.

Thanks, girls.
I love y'all to death.

Y'all don't have any idea.
We love you.

Is Buff gonna cry?

Ha!
I'm gonna cry.

We love you, Buff.
Well, let's don't cry.

No, you really were so kind
to us and we're so appreciative.

I'm gonna cry.

NICOLE:
There was a little bit
of a homecoming in it.

Like, it really was--
It was such a warm feeling.

We have to go, guys.
We got a flight to catch.

Love you guys.
Bye, guys.

NICOLE:
They did fix the pool table,
which--

I think they should
have left it.

I agree. It's iconic.

You write "Paris & Nicole," I'll
write "The Encore."
Mm-hm.

[***]

Cute.
All right.

Loves it.

Bye, Altus.
Bye, Altus.

* Sanasa, sanasa
Sana-sasa, sanasa *

[BOTH LAUGH]

Arkansas was really fun,
and it really hit us--

* Sanasa, sanasa *

ALL:
* Sanasa, sanasa *

Our song is just so special.

Everyone sings it,
and everyone loves it.

It's an international
sensation.

It really is.
Yeah.

"Sanasa."

It deserves to be...

an opera.

[***]

NICOLE:
So fun.

Same. We have to go back.

We can't wait another 20 years.
We'll be 60.

[***]

NARRATOR 2:
While small-town Arkansas
is great for inspiration,

when it comes
to staffing an ambitious opera,

Paris and Nicole know they must
tap into their wide web

of high-powered L.A. contacts,

like their middle-school
band director.

Um, we have Mr. Houser
we need to find.

Our first mentor.
Yeah.

Did we get in trouble
in his class?

I think we were just good.

He loved it.
Maybe he'll conduct.

Oh, yeah, he's a conductor.

That's why
we're going to see him.

Oh. Heh.
[LAUGHS]

I thought we were just going
to listen to stories.

Some stories?
Yes.

You know.

NICOLE:
We stepped away for two days

to go to Arkansas,

but every single day counts,

so the pressure was on,
for sure.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Oh, my gosh.
[LAUGHS]

Hi, Mr. Houser.
Nice to see you.

Good to see you.
Come in. This is great.

At our school,
teachers just didn't get us.

They didn't get
our flow.

But there were two teachers
that were, like,

I really like you guys.

Like, I really do get you guys,
and embraced us.

And Mr. Houser
was one of those people.

Wow.

Well, it'll be
my 45th year next year.

NICOLE:
Wow. Oh, my God.

You're our favorite teacher.

We talk about you
all the time.

Really?
Yeah, all the time.

PARIS: We never forgot you.
Cool.

Yeah. It is.
So cool.

NICOLE:
I would imagine
that you remember

our violin
and cello skills.

Of course.

Of course I remember.

Was I good?

[LAUGHING]

[LAUGHING]

I'll tell you why we have been
thinking about you.

I don't even know
if you know this,

but probably around the age
when you were our teacher,

um, we wrote a song
called "Sanasa,"

and people really loved it,

and so we've decided
to turn that song into an opera.

An opera?

Yeah.
Whoa.

Yeah.

As you know,
these things are not easy.

But we obviously
are really talented.

Okay.
And you were our first believer.

PARIS:
You taught us
our love for music.

Really?
Mm-hm.
Yes. Absolutely.

That means a lot.

As we start
going down the road

of putting together
an orchestra, what should we do?

Which style would you
classify your music as?

Hot.
Okay.

Iconic.
Okay, so I--

Yes, my advice would be
you need a conductor,

somebody who's gonna be
sympatico

to what you two want.
You know?

Who's the conductor,
he has black hair,

and I think he's, like,
for the L.A. Phil?

Dudamel.
Yeah.

Gustavo Dudamel.
Mm-hm.

Yeah. He's great.
Do you think he would be avail?

I don't know. He's a busy guy.

Do you have
his number?

That I don't have.

Okay.

Really, this is quite
an undertaking, to do an opera.

I think they can do it, but it's
gonna be a lot of hard work.

Would you
like to come?

Of course.

Yay! Honestly,
we just wanted to, like,

get your advice,
but also just say thank you

for bringing music
into our lives.

Oh. That's nice.

We had the best time.

This is great.
Yeah.

Yay.
Yay!

NICOLE:
I haven't been
to your mom's new house.

PARIS: Oh, you haven't?
No.

It'll be fun to see your mom.

I haven't seen her in a very,
very long time.

She loves you so much.

NICOLE:
It was important
to talk to someone

who really knew
what our vibe was,

so we could somehow
capture that spirit.

We just had so much to plan.

Oh, my God.

[IMITATE TRAIN CHUGGING]
Hi, Mitsy.

Mmm!

DUNCAN:
You lived next door?

I could see
her mom's balcony

from my dad's studio balcony,
so...

Everyone says you don't know
your neighbors in Bel-Air,

but I knew one,
and it was her.
Heh.

When you walked in
to Paris' birthday,

and I saw this little munchkin,

this most beautiful
little girl,

I'm like, "She's like a doll."
[NICOLE CHUCKLES]

And I just
fell in love with you,

and the two of you became
fast, fast friends,

and then you would come over
for the weekend or for a night.

Everything was organized
in the suitcase,

and you'd lay it out
and tell me,

"This is what I think
I'm going to wear."
Yep.

[LAUGHS] Yes.
A perfectionist.

And then this one
would go into the closet,

pick an old wig... right?
[LAUGHING]

And an old costume.

We'd go out to brunch,
and then we'd go to the park.

You know, just simple things.

I'm obsessed.

It really is pretty.

Yeah.
Should we go down here

for a second so you can peek?
Yes.

I was looking
for Paris' baby pictures.

I've had so many people here
trying to help me,

but I just don't want them
getting into certain things.

Yeah.
God forbid.

[LAUGHS]

Wow.

NARRATOR 1:
If you were ever curious

about the bowels
of Kathy Hilton's home...

NICOLE:
Wow, wow, wow.

...well, it's your lucky day.

Oh, the funniest
is all the, uh,

things that you guys used
to write. Plays and...

Where are they?

I-- I don't know.

I remember we would
go into our moms' closets

and we would just pick out

whatever was the most
sparkliest, sunglasses.

We would just get dressed up
and do like, these plays,

and we would perform at, like,
all the Christmas parties.

NICOLE: Yeah.
We would charge for tickets.

We should do it again.
Oh, my God.

I know. That's-- We should.

Cute.

[BOTH LAUGH]

What is this?

That was your little brother.
What?

You used to call it
your little brother.

Sure.
[LAUGHTER]

You used to like to go shopping
with your mom's credit card...

and you'd go with mine.
Yes, I did.

Bills that I hid.

[LAUGHTER]

But where is, like, our stuff?

Like, our recitals and things
when Nicole and I were little.

Well, honey, there's a lot--
There's a lot to unpack.

School-- I have not even--
Ordered the pictures.

[LAUGHTER]
I love you have the forms

to order the photos.

It's been 25 years.

My mom is the best.
She is such a kid at heart.

Can you believe this?
It's just overwhelming.

I mean, this is ridiculous.

You have the most
random things.

I mean, is this nuts?
Yeah.

I have kept this shoe
for 15 years

thinking I'm going to find
the other one.

[LAUGHS]
Oh.

You have some intimate gel.

[LAUGHTER]

KATHY:
All the important things.

What?

KATHY:
So, what is going on, girls?

We decided
to turn our famous song--

What is it, "Sha-shing-sha-dan"?
What is it?

What is it--?
"Ska-ska-scan-scan"?

"Sanasa."

Sanasa. Everybody does that.

We're gonna turn "Sanasa"
into an opera.

What?

An opera?
Yeah.

Who came up with that?

[LAUGHTER]

There's gotta be more
than just a Sanasan.

[LAUGHTER]
A what? "Sanasan?"

Or whatever. Right?

Yeah. It's, like,
the story of us.

It's the story
of friendship.

I'll be the director.

My mom is very creative.

We can really make this
a pop culture... extravaganza.

Yes.
Yeah.

She has...

She has lots of ideas. Yeah.
Fun ideas.

And we could get a magician
to come up.

Mm-hm.
Yeah.

And I'd like to have
a little guy

running around on a--
On a little bicycle.

[LAUGHTER]

And ferrets--
We'll let them loose.

And ferrets.
What?

Let's let ferrets
loose on people.

Yes.

I was into all of them.

And I like a doorbell ringing.

Bing, bing! Like a door.

[LAUGHTER]

We have to hire people
that can do this.

All those really,
really incredible guys

from the gay community--

[***]

Aligned.
We're creatively aligned.

On stilts.

Right.

It's an opera, Studio 54,

meets Charlie Willy Wonkie...
NICOLE: The Wizard of Oz.

Wizard of Oz.
Phantom of the Opera.

Yes.

I think she would be
a great director.

Me too.

[LAUGHS]

I could talk all night.
Yeah.

DUNCAN:
Did that actually help you
plan the opera?

No.

KATHY: Oh, this could be great.
NICOLE: Send us ideas.

KATHY:
Now I'll be up all night.

NARRATOR 1:
Next:

We really are
putting on this opera.

It's the story of us.

We basically need help.

So you're in?
No.

We're just looking for
a cool mil.

Don't call us,
we will call you.

You have my number, right?
Uh, yep. We got it.

NICOLE:
We have full orchestra,
full choir, full everything.

Hi, guys. Hi.

Hi.

Looks like a big pretzel.
[LAUGHS]

[SINGING]

How much do you charge?

[SHRIEKING]
* Sanasa! *

[LAUGHTER]

I wanted this reunion
to be really iconic.

[HIGH-PITCHED]
* Sanasa *

Feels very...out of tune.

Oh.