Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,153 --> 00:00:04,677
[ Dramatic music plays ]
2
00:00:09,378 --> 00:00:12,294
Ah! Check it out.
3
00:00:12,337 --> 00:00:14,687
Double-breasted --
timeless.
4
00:00:14,731 --> 00:00:16,950
Scholls:
You'll never get away with this.
5
00:00:16,994 --> 00:00:20,128
A fitted suit on a pear shape?
You're insane.
6
00:00:20,171 --> 00:00:22,608
What did I tell you
about speaking?
7
00:00:22,652 --> 00:00:25,437
I guess somebody doesn't want
their dinner pellets tonight!
8
00:00:25,481 --> 00:00:27,831
[ Doorbell rings ]
9
00:00:27,874 --> 00:00:31,226
♪♪
10
00:00:36,709 --> 00:00:38,320
Damn it.
11
00:00:48,417 --> 00:00:49,592
Just don't talk.
12
00:00:49,635 --> 00:00:50,723
Got it.
13
00:00:56,686 --> 00:00:58,166
Can I help you,
Officer?
14
00:00:58,209 --> 00:01:01,778
Are you Calvin Sniglet
of 3412 Vicious Circle?
15
00:01:01,821 --> 00:01:03,475
Yeah.
16
00:01:04,737 --> 00:01:06,609
We've been looking
for you.
17
00:01:06,652 --> 00:01:08,263
Is that right?
18
00:01:09,307 --> 00:01:11,788
I'm afraid
I've got some bad news.
19
00:01:18,273 --> 00:01:19,535
There's been
three break-ins
20
00:01:19,578 --> 00:01:21,145
in this neighborhood
in the last month.
21
00:01:21,189 --> 00:01:23,016
We're doing our best
to keep the neighborhood safe,
22
00:01:23,060 --> 00:01:24,453
but keep your doors locked,
23
00:01:24,496 --> 00:01:26,933
and if you see something,
say something.
24
00:01:28,152 --> 00:01:30,459
Sir, you mind opening the door
so I can slip you my card?
25
00:01:35,812 --> 00:01:38,031
What is that?
26
00:01:41,034 --> 00:01:44,125
You think
I wouldn't notice this?
27
00:01:44,168 --> 00:01:47,693
[ Chainsaw whirs ]You've got a low-battery light
on your smoke detector.
28
00:01:50,435 --> 00:01:52,524
Oh, yeah.
29
00:01:52,568 --> 00:01:53,960
I've been meaning
to change that.
30
00:01:54,004 --> 00:01:55,614
I'll take care of it.
31
00:01:55,658 --> 00:01:58,704
You know,
undetected flames
32
00:01:58,748 --> 00:02:01,185
is the number-one cause
of fire in the home.
33
00:02:01,229 --> 00:02:02,969
Okay. There you go.
34
00:02:03,013 --> 00:02:05,363
-Well, thank you, Officer.
-My pleasure.
35
00:02:05,407 --> 00:02:08,584
Oh, and, uh, you need to change
your wife's newspaper.
36
00:02:12,327 --> 00:02:14,372
♪♪
37
00:02:18,289 --> 00:02:20,683
♪ Angie Tribeca
38
00:02:20,726 --> 00:02:22,989
You're gonna be locked up
for a long time.
39
00:02:23,033 --> 00:02:24,339
I'm talking life.
40
00:02:24,382 --> 00:02:26,558
No parole, no appeals.
41
00:02:26,602 --> 00:02:29,561
And then she says her vows
and -- boom -- we're hitched.
42
00:02:29,605 --> 00:02:31,084
It's gonna be beautiful, sir.
43
00:02:31,128 --> 00:02:33,217
So where are we on Scholls?
Has anyone found her?
44
00:02:33,261 --> 00:02:35,654
Not yet, sir, but this should
really speed things up.
45
00:02:35,698 --> 00:02:38,048
Oh, wow. That's great.
Great picture.
46
00:02:38,091 --> 00:02:40,224
There's a theory
that Calvin Sniglet took her
47
00:02:40,268 --> 00:02:41,878
to get back at us
for ruining his plan
48
00:02:41,921 --> 00:02:43,488
to destroy humanity.
-It's not a theory.
49
00:02:43,532 --> 00:02:46,578
He definitely has her.
-Listen to me.
50
00:02:46,622 --> 00:02:48,711
I want every resource we have
devoted to this.
51
00:02:48,754 --> 00:02:51,279
I also want
every resource we have
52
00:02:51,322 --> 00:02:53,542
devoted to
this other murder...
53
00:02:53,585 --> 00:02:57,981
30-year-old female Susan Learner
found dead in massage parlor.
54
00:02:58,024 --> 00:03:00,375
Somebody rubbed her out,
and you're gonna find out who.
55
00:03:00,418 --> 00:03:01,811
Geils,
this will represent
56
00:03:01,854 --> 00:03:03,813
the final stage
of your lieutenant training.
57
00:03:03,856 --> 00:03:05,293
Good luck.
-Thank you, sir.
58
00:03:05,336 --> 00:03:06,772
You're in charge
while I take a leave of absence
59
00:03:06,816 --> 00:03:08,383
for my wedding
and my honeymoon.
60
00:03:08,426 --> 00:03:10,298
But the second
you hear anything --
61
00:03:10,341 --> 00:03:12,604
anything at all about Scholls,
contact me.
62
00:03:12,648 --> 00:03:14,215
-How do we get --
-I'm unreachable.
63
00:03:14,258 --> 00:03:17,087
-Oh, sir, your heart medicat--
-Tell it to Geils!
64
00:03:19,916 --> 00:03:21,613
[ Whispers ]
We're ready for you.
65
00:03:21,657 --> 00:03:23,528
[ Whispers ] Okay, great.
66
00:03:23,572 --> 00:03:25,835
[ Whispers ] Are we supposed
to leave our underwear on?
67
00:03:25,878 --> 00:03:27,532
Yes.
68
00:03:27,576 --> 00:03:29,795
Oh, cool, cool.
69
00:03:31,406 --> 00:03:33,669
[ Normal voice ]
What are we looking at, Scholls.
70
00:03:33,712 --> 00:03:35,323
Oh, right.
71
00:03:35,366 --> 00:03:36,628
I think we got to
get used to the fact
72
00:03:36,672 --> 00:03:39,631
that she might not be around
anymore.
73
00:03:39,675 --> 00:03:41,329
Any witnesses, Scholls?
74
00:03:41,372 --> 00:03:42,939
Pandora:
I'm a witness.
75
00:03:42,982 --> 00:03:45,333
I found Miss Learner dead
on the table.
76
00:03:45,376 --> 00:03:47,422
I'm Detective Tribeca.
This is Detective Tanner.
77
00:03:47,465 --> 00:03:48,858
Can we ask you a couple
of questions?
78
00:03:48,901 --> 00:03:50,468
Sure.
Room number four.
79
00:03:50,512 --> 00:03:52,078
Take off the robe,
get under the blanket,
80
00:03:52,122 --> 00:03:53,210
and I'll be in
in a minute.
81
00:03:53,254 --> 00:03:55,734
Did you bring
any extra underwear?
82
00:03:55,778 --> 00:03:59,608
Susan's been a regular client
for a couple years.
83
00:03:59,651 --> 00:04:02,306
I came in for her appointment
and found her like that.
84
00:04:02,350 --> 00:04:04,003
Did anyone hear anything?
85
00:04:04,047 --> 00:04:05,527
Oh, I heard her screaming,
86
00:04:05,570 --> 00:04:07,616
but I thought it was coming
from Marco's room,
87
00:04:07,659 --> 00:04:10,749
'cause his hot stones
can be pretty hot.
88
00:04:10,793 --> 00:04:13,970
Ooh.
You got a lot of knots.
89
00:04:14,013 --> 00:04:15,406
I have a lot going on
right now.
90
00:04:18,366 --> 00:04:21,325
Could you give us the names of
all the masseuses working today?
91
00:04:21,369 --> 00:04:24,372
Sure can. I can get them
from the front desk.
92
00:04:24,415 --> 00:04:26,983
Scholls would've
had them names already.
93
00:04:27,026 --> 00:04:28,114
I know.
94
00:04:28,158 --> 00:04:30,116
Anybody want a happy ending?
95
00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:32,293
-Yes, please.
-Absolutely.
96
00:04:33,032 --> 00:04:34,599
That'll do, pig.
97
00:04:38,516 --> 00:04:39,691
That'll do.
98
00:04:44,957 --> 00:04:49,005
[ Dramatic music playing ]
99
00:04:49,048 --> 00:04:50,354
Anything yet?
100
00:04:50,398 --> 00:04:51,703
I'm about to slice it open.
101
00:04:53,314 --> 00:04:55,446
Here it goes.
102
00:04:59,232 --> 00:05:01,757
Whoa. Are you seeing
what I'm seeing?
103
00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:03,324
I see it,
but I don't believe it.
104
00:05:05,064 --> 00:05:08,154
This should do it.
One final cut.
105
00:05:09,286 --> 00:05:11,462
-Whoa.
-Whoa, it's amazing.
106
00:05:11,506 --> 00:05:13,029
My God.
107
00:05:13,072 --> 00:05:14,204
Look at the layers.
108
00:05:14,247 --> 00:05:16,424
Pepperoni, cheese, sauce.
109
00:05:16,467 --> 00:05:17,729
And what's that
on the crust?
110
00:05:18,948 --> 00:05:20,428
Caramelized cheese.
111
00:05:20,471 --> 00:05:22,430
Little Caesars
is getting busy.
112
00:05:25,781 --> 00:05:29,350
Mmm. That's Little Caesars
Deep!Deep! Dish pizza.
113
00:05:31,395 --> 00:05:33,354
Is this the forensics lab?
114
00:05:33,397 --> 00:05:35,617
Mom?
What are you doing here?
115
00:05:35,660 --> 00:05:39,098
Oh, the temp agency sent me to
be the new forensics specialist.
116
00:05:39,142 --> 00:05:42,232
Mrs. Tribeca,
great to see you.
117
00:05:42,275 --> 00:05:43,625
Here's the body
right over here.
118
00:05:43,668 --> 00:05:45,888
Why did you dump him
again?
119
00:05:45,931 --> 00:05:47,237
Mom, stop it!
120
00:05:47,280 --> 00:05:50,283
Oh, mm.
This is serious.
121
00:05:50,327 --> 00:05:51,807
You don't know
anything about forensics.
122
00:05:51,850 --> 00:05:52,982
Why did they send you here?
123
00:05:53,025 --> 00:05:54,418
Because I told them
I could type
124
00:05:54,462 --> 00:05:56,594
and that I have a doctorate
in forensic science.
125
00:05:56,638 --> 00:05:58,683
-You know how to type?
-No.
126
00:05:58,727 --> 00:06:00,685
Without Scholls,
this is hopeless.
127
00:06:00,729 --> 00:06:03,949
These lacerations are consistent
with an animal attack.
128
00:06:03,993 --> 00:06:05,516
Look at the spaces
between the claws.
129
00:06:05,560 --> 00:06:07,953
This woman was killed
by a Bengal tiger.
130
00:06:07,997 --> 00:06:10,434
Whoa.
How did you even...
131
00:06:10,478 --> 00:06:13,089
Neil Young had a fascination
with big cats --
132
00:06:13,132 --> 00:06:14,220
and my derriere.
133
00:06:14,264 --> 00:06:15,613
Mom!
134
00:06:15,657 --> 00:06:18,486
How did a tiger get into
a massage parlor?
135
00:06:18,529 --> 00:06:21,576
By dressing
in human clothes.
136
00:06:21,619 --> 00:06:23,142
Sniglet.
137
00:06:23,186 --> 00:06:24,448
[ Elevator bell dings ]
138
00:06:24,492 --> 00:06:27,277
If we find Sniglet,
we can find Scholls.
139
00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:28,757
Found him.
140
00:06:30,498 --> 00:06:31,716
Good afternoon.
141
00:06:31,760 --> 00:06:33,631
Calvin Sniglet,
you're under arrest.
142
00:06:33,675 --> 00:06:35,024
Not so fast.
143
00:06:35,067 --> 00:06:37,548
Stand back.
He's got a bedbug.
144
00:06:42,292 --> 00:06:44,947
Jesus, you train for this,
but nothing can prepare you.
145
00:06:44,990 --> 00:06:47,036
Lay one hand on me,
and I set him loose.
146
00:06:47,079 --> 00:06:49,952
Have fun washing
and re-washing your clothes --
147
00:06:49,995 --> 00:06:52,433
putting everything you own
into bags,
148
00:06:52,476 --> 00:06:54,435
constantly scratching
tiny bug bites.
149
00:06:54,478 --> 00:06:57,176
And worst of all,
purchasing a brand-new mattress.
150
00:06:57,220 --> 00:06:58,613
I just got used to mine.
151
00:06:58,656 --> 00:07:01,920
And we're miles away
from Labor Day sales.
152
00:07:16,152 --> 00:07:17,501
What do you want,
Sniglet?
153
00:07:17,545 --> 00:07:18,981
Not much.
154
00:07:19,024 --> 00:07:20,417
Just for you to close
the L.A. Zoo
155
00:07:20,461 --> 00:07:21,679
and set all the animals free.
156
00:07:21,723 --> 00:07:23,115
No way.
Never gonna happen.
157
00:07:23,159 --> 00:07:24,813
Then the animal attacks
will continue.
158
00:07:24,856 --> 00:07:27,511
And you'll be seeing Dr. Scholls
back in the forensics lab.
159
00:07:27,555 --> 00:07:29,557
-Well, that's good.
-As a corpse.
160
00:07:29,600 --> 00:07:30,993
I walked right into that.
161
00:07:31,036 --> 00:07:33,865
Set all the zoo animals free,
162
00:07:33,909 --> 00:07:35,867
and you can have
your human back.
163
00:07:44,572 --> 00:07:46,487
Uh-oh.
164
00:07:46,530 --> 00:07:48,706
Siri, get me the mayor.
165
00:07:48,750 --> 00:07:50,926
-Calling Mayor Joe Perry.
-Siri, hang up.
166
00:07:50,969 --> 00:07:52,667
[ Siri chimes ]You can't close the zoo.
167
00:07:52,710 --> 00:07:55,626
It'll be chaos, and we can't
have chaos this weekend --
168
00:07:55,670 --> 00:07:57,062
it's Cat-astrophic!
169
00:07:57,106 --> 00:07:59,195
We all enjoy the nation's
largest cat festival,
170
00:07:59,238 --> 00:08:01,327
but I have to think about
the safety of our citizens.
171
00:08:01,371 --> 00:08:02,894
If the Lieutenant were here
right now,
172
00:08:02,938 --> 00:08:04,069
you know what he'd say.
173
00:08:04,113 --> 00:08:05,418
Atkins:
Geils, don't be foolish.
174
00:08:05,462 --> 00:08:06,898
That's a good Atkins.
175
00:08:06,942 --> 00:08:08,378
I couldn't stay away.
176
00:08:08,421 --> 00:08:11,381
These are my future in-laws,
Frank and Tanya.
177
00:08:11,424 --> 00:08:13,165
Can, uh, you point me
to the bathroom?
178
00:08:13,209 --> 00:08:15,820
Down the hall,
and make it quick!
179
00:08:15,864 --> 00:08:17,256
These animal attacks
will continue
180
00:08:17,300 --> 00:08:18,823
unless we listen
to Sniglet's demands,
181
00:08:18,867 --> 00:08:21,086
not to mention Scholls.
We have no choice.
182
00:08:21,130 --> 00:08:22,827
Sniglet is a madman.
183
00:08:22,871 --> 00:08:24,568
If we give in to him now,
who knows what he'll do next.
184
00:08:24,612 --> 00:08:26,091
Damn it, Geils,
185
00:08:26,135 --> 00:08:28,354
90% of the city's revenue
comes from zoo tickets.
186
00:08:28,398 --> 00:08:30,618
Detroit has cars.
Wisconsin has cheese.
187
00:08:30,661 --> 00:08:33,098
L.A. has fat people
roaming around
188
00:08:33,142 --> 00:08:34,447
looking at animals in cages.
189
00:08:34,491 --> 00:08:36,101
Phew!
That's better.
190
00:08:36,145 --> 00:08:37,581
Welcome back, Mrs. Weidner.
191
00:08:37,625 --> 00:08:39,148
Now, if potty time is over,
192
00:08:39,191 --> 00:08:41,498
we have a rehearsal dinner
to get to.
193
00:08:47,809 --> 00:08:49,245
It's your call.
194
00:08:50,812 --> 00:08:52,596
All my life, I've wanted to be
the kind of lieutenant
195
00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:55,773
who prevents people
from getting killed.
196
00:08:55,817 --> 00:08:58,123
Get me the mayor.
I'm closing the zoo.
197
00:08:59,603 --> 00:09:01,605
Oh, wow.
That's so wrong.
198
00:09:07,698 --> 00:09:11,006
♪♪
199
00:09:23,322 --> 00:09:26,021
I know what you're gonna say.
Closing the zoo was a mistake.
200
00:09:26,064 --> 00:09:28,284
People are still getting killed,
Sniglet lied,
201
00:09:28,327 --> 00:09:31,417
and Scholls is no closer
to being found.
202
00:09:31,461 --> 00:09:33,332
Your career is doomed,
Geils.
203
00:09:33,376 --> 00:09:34,986
Good doomed
or bad doomed?
204
00:09:35,030 --> 00:09:37,293
And as far
as Dr. Scholls...
205
00:09:38,424 --> 00:09:40,557
Monica, you're alive.
How did you escape?
206
00:09:40,601 --> 00:09:42,777
I used my bun to pick
the lock on the cage.
207
00:09:42,820 --> 00:09:44,822
After that, it was a simple
matter of seducing an armadillo
208
00:09:44,866 --> 00:09:46,432
and then walking out
the front door.
209
00:09:46,476 --> 00:09:49,827
After which, Monica and I
had quite a nice talk.
210
00:09:49,871 --> 00:09:52,308
Didn't we, Monica?
-It was okay.
211
00:09:52,351 --> 00:09:54,223
Geils, I was quite intrigued
to learn
212
00:09:54,266 --> 00:09:56,878
that you were not only having
an inappropriate relationship
213
00:09:56,921 --> 00:09:59,010
with the head of forensics,
but that, subsequently,
214
00:09:59,054 --> 00:10:00,577
you were having
an inappropriate relationship
215
00:10:00,621 --> 00:10:01,970
with another detective.
216
00:10:02,013 --> 00:10:03,667
Why are you doing this?
217
00:10:03,711 --> 00:10:06,583
I could talk about things
like ethics and civil service,
218
00:10:06,627 --> 00:10:08,541
transparency
in law enforcement,
219
00:10:08,585 --> 00:10:11,196
but the simple truth is
you traded hos,
220
00:10:11,240 --> 00:10:12,720
now we tradin' blows.
221
00:10:12,763 --> 00:10:15,723
Acting Lieutenant Geils,
you are hereby suspended.
222
00:10:15,766 --> 00:10:17,638
Mr. Mayor, please.
We can fix this.
223
00:10:17,681 --> 00:10:19,074
It's not Geils' fault.
224
00:10:19,117 --> 00:10:21,032
Are you speaking as a cop
or an ex-lover?
225
00:10:21,076 --> 00:10:22,512
Ex-lover.
226
00:10:22,555 --> 00:10:24,862
In accordance with the line
of succession,
227
00:10:24,906 --> 00:10:27,169
Detective Hoffman
is acting lieutenant.
228
00:10:30,389 --> 00:10:32,957
Geils, don't worry.
We're gonna figure this out.
229
00:10:33,001 --> 00:10:34,219
You were right, Angie.
230
00:10:34,263 --> 00:10:36,526
It was a mistake for me
to even try.
231
00:10:39,268 --> 00:10:43,141
You suspended a good cop.
Maybe the best.
232
00:10:44,447 --> 00:10:47,363
I told you about
the secret bathroom.
233
00:10:50,714 --> 00:10:54,326
♪ Ooh, girl,
you make my mind go crazy♪
234
00:10:54,370 --> 00:10:55,501
♪ Yes, I --♪
235
00:10:59,854 --> 00:11:02,160
Well, well, well.
236
00:11:02,204 --> 00:11:04,815
Angela Tribeca.
237
00:11:04,859 --> 00:11:06,687
Dr. Hornbein,
I need your help.
238
00:11:06,730 --> 00:11:09,777
Please, sit down.
239
00:11:09,820 --> 00:11:13,694
Calvin Sniglet has somehow
trained the zoo animals
240
00:11:13,737 --> 00:11:15,347
to attack humans.
-Mm.
241
00:11:15,391 --> 00:11:17,045
So the hunted are becoming
the hunters,
242
00:11:17,088 --> 00:11:19,308
the consumed are becoming
the consumers.
243
00:11:19,351 --> 00:11:22,528
The downtrodden are becoming
the up-not-trodden.
244
00:11:22,572 --> 00:11:24,095
I don't know
how to stop him.
245
00:11:24,139 --> 00:11:27,403
Personal things, please.
246
00:11:27,446 --> 00:11:29,710
Fine.
247
00:11:29,753 --> 00:11:32,103
I found out
my father was alive.
248
00:11:32,147 --> 00:11:35,063
He faked his own death
when I was 12.
249
00:11:35,106 --> 00:11:37,805
I went to see him,
and he ran away again.
250
00:11:37,848 --> 00:11:39,415
Yes, yes, I know that.
251
00:11:39,458 --> 00:11:41,722
What I want you to tell me
is how did that make you feel.
252
00:11:41,765 --> 00:11:43,941
-Angry.
-That's a secondary emotion.
253
00:11:43,985 --> 00:11:47,945
How did it make you feel?
-Sad. Alone.
254
00:11:47,989 --> 00:11:50,078
Those are all
secondary emotions.
255
00:11:50,121 --> 00:11:52,776
Tell me
how did it make you feel?!
256
00:11:52,820 --> 00:11:54,822
Hurt.
257
00:11:54,865 --> 00:11:57,346
Hurt, yes.
258
00:11:57,389 --> 00:11:59,652
It's easy to hurt children.
259
00:11:59,696 --> 00:12:01,567
They have no control over
what happens to them --
260
00:12:01,611 --> 00:12:03,439
neither do animals,
actually.
261
00:12:03,482 --> 00:12:06,572
Mr. Sniglet is both
an animal and a child.
262
00:12:06,616 --> 00:12:08,749
Now he's fighting
for control.
263
00:12:08,792 --> 00:12:10,011
How do we stop him?
264
00:12:10,054 --> 00:12:11,795
Oh, I'll help you.
265
00:12:13,101 --> 00:12:15,843
Under one condition.
266
00:12:15,886 --> 00:12:19,629
And now by the power vested in
me from the State of California,
267
00:12:19,672 --> 00:12:22,806
the City of Los Angeles,
and audible.com,
268
00:12:22,850 --> 00:12:25,766
I now pronounced you
Lieutenant and wife.
269
00:12:25,809 --> 00:12:28,029
You may kiss the bride.
270
00:12:28,072 --> 00:12:31,032
[ Applause ]
271
00:12:31,075 --> 00:12:33,121
[ Mendelssohn's
"Wedding March" plays ]
272
00:12:40,781 --> 00:12:42,521
Here ya go --
total failure.
273
00:12:42,565 --> 00:12:45,655
Hey, he's just a guy who was
trying to do the right thing
274
00:12:45,698 --> 00:12:47,483
and it resulted
in seven people dying.
275
00:12:47,526 --> 00:12:49,354
Total failure is the name
of the drink.
276
00:12:49,398 --> 00:12:52,183
It's two shots of Four Loko
and a can of New Coke.
277
00:12:55,578 --> 00:12:57,362
I'm worried about you,
Geils.
278
00:12:57,406 --> 00:13:00,496
Why don't you just go hang out
with your serial killer date?
279
00:13:00,539 --> 00:13:02,890
[ Upbeat music playing ]
280
00:13:02,933 --> 00:13:04,108
It's the only way
I could get him
281
00:13:04,152 --> 00:13:06,284
to agree to help me
find Sniglet.
282
00:13:06,328 --> 00:13:08,721
Lieutenant Hoffman
signed off on it.
283
00:13:08,765 --> 00:13:09,853
Sorry.
284
00:13:09,897 --> 00:13:12,073
You'll make
lieutenant soon.
285
00:13:12,116 --> 00:13:15,424
Honestly, I haven't given it
a second thought.
286
00:13:15,467 --> 00:13:17,992
Thanks for letting me read
the first draft of your book.
287
00:13:18,035 --> 00:13:19,907
I love the end
when he makes lieutenant.
288
00:13:22,518 --> 00:13:25,086
I'm not great
at emotional pep talks
289
00:13:25,129 --> 00:13:28,002
that inspire people
to action, but...
290
00:13:28,045 --> 00:13:29,960
for you,
I'm gonna give it a shot.
291
00:13:31,701 --> 00:13:34,182
[ Grunts ] Ow!
292
00:13:34,225 --> 00:13:35,574
Quit feeling sorry
for yourself
293
00:13:35,618 --> 00:13:37,533
and step up to the plate,
you big pussy.
294
00:13:37,576 --> 00:13:39,665
People need you.
295
00:13:39,709 --> 00:13:41,842
And if you're gonna focus
on what you've lost
296
00:13:41,885 --> 00:13:44,235
and not on what you have,
then you're really stupid.
297
00:13:44,279 --> 00:13:45,715
I'm talking to myself, too.
298
00:13:45,758 --> 00:13:47,804
My dad left me.
Who cares?!
299
00:13:47,848 --> 00:13:50,502
I raised myself,
and I became a great cop.
300
00:13:50,546 --> 00:13:52,809
I was basically my own dad.
301
00:13:52,853 --> 00:13:55,377
So what if no one ever
told me how sex works.
302
00:13:55,420 --> 00:13:56,682
That explains a lot.
303
00:13:56,726 --> 00:13:58,206
When bad stuff happens,
304
00:13:58,249 --> 00:14:00,686
the dad in us picks up
the little kid in us,
305
00:14:00,730 --> 00:14:02,732
and we get the job done.
306
00:14:02,775 --> 00:14:04,560
So?
307
00:14:04,603 --> 00:14:06,997
Ready to go to work...
308
00:14:07,041 --> 00:14:09,043
son?
309
00:14:09,086 --> 00:14:11,393
Yeah.[ Glass clinking ]
310
00:14:11,436 --> 00:14:14,439
If I could have
everyone's attention, please.
311
00:14:14,483 --> 00:14:17,051
I'd like to say a few words
about my mentor,
312
00:14:17,094 --> 00:14:19,531
the man who's taught me
right from wrong,
313
00:14:19,575 --> 00:14:21,272
courage under fire,
314
00:14:21,316 --> 00:14:24,972
the difference between "there,"
"they're," and "their,"
315
00:14:25,015 --> 00:14:29,933
and how to take care of the
weakest among us, the animals.
316
00:14:29,977 --> 00:14:32,805
I'm talking, of course,
about Calvin Sniglet.
317
00:14:34,111 --> 00:14:36,940
[ People gasp ]Hello, everyone!
318
00:14:36,984 --> 00:14:38,768
Oh, my God.
She's with him.
319
00:14:38,811 --> 00:14:40,988
It's gonna be so much fun
shooting her.
320
00:14:41,031 --> 00:14:43,773
Welcome, everyone,
to the last...
321
00:14:43,816 --> 00:14:46,080
[ Feedback ]To the last...
322
00:14:46,123 --> 00:14:47,820
[ Feedback ]Hello.
323
00:14:47,864 --> 00:14:49,344
Come on. Seriously?
324
00:14:49,387 --> 00:14:51,085
Check, two, check.
325
00:14:51,128 --> 00:14:52,825
Hello.
326
00:14:52,869 --> 00:14:55,132
Ah. Come on. Hello.
327
00:14:55,176 --> 00:14:57,308
Can you hear me, anybody?
Can I, uh...
328
00:14:57,352 --> 00:14:58,527
Check it --
check it, two.
329
00:14:58,570 --> 00:14:59,920
Check, give me --
check two.
330
00:15:01,182 --> 00:15:03,401
Hello. Check. Come on.
331
00:15:03,445 --> 00:15:05,012
One, two. One --
332
00:15:05,055 --> 00:15:07,144
Can I get another microphone,
please? Do you see?
333
00:15:07,188 --> 00:15:08,580
Yeah, just give me
a new microphone. This is...
334
00:15:09,581 --> 00:15:11,148
How about now?
How about -- Can you hear me?
335
00:15:11,192 --> 00:15:13,629
Check? Yeah, there we go!
Okay.
336
00:15:13,672 --> 00:15:15,761
Much better, all right.
We're good now, folks.
337
00:15:15,805 --> 00:15:17,546
Ladies and gentlemen,
338
00:15:17,589 --> 00:15:20,592
welcome to your last day
on Earth.[ People gasp ]
339
00:15:20,636 --> 00:15:24,640
Humans are the most destructive
force this planet has ever seen,
340
00:15:24,683 --> 00:15:26,903
and it ends today.
341
00:15:26,947 --> 00:15:28,122
Calvin.
342
00:15:28,165 --> 00:15:29,775
Oh, hey, Angie.
Good to see you.
343
00:15:29,819 --> 00:15:31,386
Turn yourself in.
344
00:15:31,429 --> 00:15:33,823
We know your heart's
in the right place.
345
00:15:33,866 --> 00:15:36,260
The way that we treat animals
is absolutely insane.
346
00:15:36,304 --> 00:15:40,047
But killing all the humans
isn't the answer.
347
00:15:40,090 --> 00:15:42,745
Go volunteer.
Be an activist.
348
00:15:42,788 --> 00:15:44,442
Heck, run for mayor.
You got my vote.
349
00:15:44,486 --> 00:15:46,575
Ah,
it doesn't matter anyway.
350
00:15:46,618 --> 00:15:49,491
Humans had their time
on Earth.
351
00:15:49,534 --> 00:15:52,624
And like all species,
they eventually go extinct.
352
00:15:52,668 --> 00:15:55,323
I'm just here
to speed up the process.
353
00:15:55,366 --> 00:15:57,325
You can't win.
354
00:15:57,368 --> 00:15:58,804
There's too many of us.
355
00:15:58,848 --> 00:16:00,371
You're right.
356
00:16:00,415 --> 00:16:01,633
I'm all alone.
357
00:16:01,677 --> 00:16:03,853
Or am I?
358
00:16:03,896 --> 00:16:05,159
[ Chuckles ]
359
00:16:06,377 --> 00:16:08,205
Say hello
to my little friend.
360
00:16:10,381 --> 00:16:13,210
-[ Roars ]
-[ Laughs ]
361
00:16:13,254 --> 00:16:15,386
Devour them!
362
00:16:15,430 --> 00:16:16,997
Damn.
I thought it was a Jet Ski.
363
00:16:17,040 --> 00:16:20,783
Angie.
Angie, let me loose.
364
00:16:20,826 --> 00:16:22,176
I'm a trained zoo keeper.
365
00:16:22,219 --> 00:16:23,307
[ Roars ]
366
00:16:30,358 --> 00:16:33,535
Hello,
my majestic jungle --
367
00:16:33,578 --> 00:16:35,102
-[ Snarls ]
-[ Screams ]
368
00:16:37,147 --> 00:16:39,845
If I never pee in
another Porta-Potty again,
369
00:16:39,889 --> 00:16:43,240
it will be too s--
370
00:16:43,284 --> 00:16:44,111
[ Roars ]
371
00:16:51,118 --> 00:16:53,033
[ Gasps ]
372
00:16:55,165 --> 00:16:57,776
[ Laughs ] Yes!
373
00:16:57,820 --> 00:17:01,519
Yes! Hunt them down
just as they would do to you!
374
00:17:01,563 --> 00:17:02,825
Togeth-- Aah!
375
00:17:06,611 --> 00:17:08,526
It's pretty bad
out there.
376
00:17:08,570 --> 00:17:10,615
We might not
make it out alive.
377
00:17:10,659 --> 00:17:12,226
I just want to say
378
00:17:12,269 --> 00:17:14,010
I always planned on getting
back together with you
379
00:17:14,054 --> 00:17:15,403
when I ran out of options.
380
00:17:15,446 --> 00:17:18,493
That means a lot to me,
but we're gonna be okay.
381
00:17:18,536 --> 00:17:21,844
Sniglet's dead, and I'm sure
the tiger's getting full.
382
00:17:21,887 --> 00:17:23,585
We just need a weapon.
383
00:17:23,628 --> 00:17:26,022
Angie, hand me the...
384
00:17:26,066 --> 00:17:27,806
Angie?
385
00:17:27,850 --> 00:17:31,288
Hey, Stripes,
pick on someone your own size!
386
00:17:31,332 --> 00:17:34,074
[ Snarls ]
387
00:17:34,117 --> 00:17:35,727
Oh, shit.
388
00:17:37,033 --> 00:17:38,817
Tribeca!
389
00:17:40,602 --> 00:17:43,779
[ Snarling ]
390
00:17:45,607 --> 00:17:48,610
[ Panting ] Bad kitty.
391
00:17:48,653 --> 00:17:51,221
You have the right
to remain endangered.
392
00:17:51,265 --> 00:17:52,788
[ Groans ]
393
00:17:52,831 --> 00:17:54,877
Geils.
394
00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:57,662
Geils?
395
00:17:57,706 --> 00:17:59,534
Geils.
396
00:17:59,577 --> 00:18:01,318
I'm not gonna make it.
397
00:18:01,362 --> 00:18:03,320
No, no, yes, you are.
Yes, you are.
398
00:18:03,364 --> 00:18:05,540
No, I'm not.
399
00:18:06,802 --> 00:18:08,804
Then you should know
that I love you
400
00:18:08,847 --> 00:18:11,807
more than I've ever loved
anybody or anything.
401
00:18:12,895 --> 00:18:18,509
More than my parents,
siblings, chocolate, money.
402
00:18:20,076 --> 00:18:21,730
You'll always be
my partner.
403
00:18:21,773 --> 00:18:26,038
And now
I'll always be alone.
404
00:18:26,082 --> 00:18:28,737
[ Sobbing ]
405
00:18:28,780 --> 00:18:33,045
Congratulations,
Lieutenant.
406
00:18:33,089 --> 00:18:34,134
What -- What was that?
407
00:18:34,177 --> 00:18:36,875
I -- I said...
408
00:18:36,919 --> 00:18:38,964
"Congratulations,
Lieutenant."
409
00:18:48,931 --> 00:18:51,455
[ Cheering ]
410
00:18:55,459 --> 00:18:57,157
Good work,
Detective Geils.
411
00:18:58,506 --> 00:19:00,856
Or should I say...
412
00:19:00,899 --> 00:19:02,858
Lieutenant Geils.
413
00:19:02,901 --> 00:19:05,165
[ Cheering ]
414
00:19:07,167 --> 00:19:08,255
You mean this was all --
415
00:19:08,298 --> 00:19:09,821
Your final exam.
416
00:19:09,865 --> 00:19:12,389
You passed
with flying colors.
417
00:19:12,433 --> 00:19:14,391
But what about Sniglet
and the zoo keeper?
418
00:19:14,435 --> 00:19:16,176
Say hello to Todd Bender
from Vice.
419
00:19:17,873 --> 00:19:20,789
And Chris Harbinson
from the daycare center.
420
00:19:20,832 --> 00:19:22,399
Special kudos to Harbinson.
421
00:19:22,443 --> 00:19:25,620
He had to spend 15 years
in prison to prepare for this.
422
00:19:25,663 --> 00:19:27,796
So fun. [ Laughs ]
423
00:19:29,014 --> 00:19:31,191
-But you got married, right?
-Yeah, right.
424
00:19:31,234 --> 00:19:33,149
Say hello to my niece,
Natasha.
425
00:19:33,193 --> 00:19:34,977
Good to see you,
Uncle Pritikin.You too, honey.
426
00:19:36,065 --> 00:19:37,284
But the --
But the tiger.
427
00:19:37,327 --> 00:19:39,286
-[ Chuckles ]
-Congratulations.
428
00:19:39,329 --> 00:19:43,725
But if it means anything,
I was into the handcuffs.
429
00:19:43,768 --> 00:19:45,248
We went to different cities
tracking Sniglet.
430
00:19:45,292 --> 00:19:46,902
He killed people.
431
00:19:46,945 --> 00:19:50,558
All death row inmates that
were gonna get executed anyway.
432
00:19:50,601 --> 00:19:53,256
What?!
433
00:19:53,300 --> 00:19:54,823
There were times
when people worked the case
434
00:19:54,866 --> 00:19:56,259
that I wasn't there.
435
00:19:56,303 --> 00:19:59,393
Geils, you're over-thinking it,
as usual.
436
00:19:59,436 --> 00:20:02,439
But you know what isreal?
437
00:20:02,483 --> 00:20:03,788
This party.
438
00:20:03,832 --> 00:20:06,138
So let's get to it!
-[ Chuckles ]
439
00:20:06,182 --> 00:20:09,185
♪ Whoa, I feel good
440
00:20:10,534 --> 00:20:13,755
♪ I knew that I would now
441
00:20:13,798 --> 00:20:16,453
♪ I feel good
442
00:20:16,497 --> 00:20:19,413
♪ I knew that I would now
443
00:20:19,456 --> 00:20:22,329
[ Jazz music plays ]
444
00:20:22,372 --> 00:20:23,678
[ Ice rattling ]
445
00:20:23,721 --> 00:20:24,809
[ Tanner laughs ]
446
00:20:24,853 --> 00:20:26,333
[ Sighs ]
447
00:20:26,376 --> 00:20:28,248
What a party, huh?
448
00:20:28,291 --> 00:20:31,120
Mmm! And we have the taxpayers
to thank.
449
00:20:31,163 --> 00:20:33,514
[ Laughter ]
450
00:20:33,557 --> 00:20:37,169
They're probably gonna put you
in a big office.
451
00:20:37,213 --> 00:20:38,519
I'm gonna miss
having you near me.
452
00:20:38,562 --> 00:20:40,085
Atkins:
Oh, that reminds me.
453
00:20:40,129 --> 00:20:42,044
I did such a good job
with the Geils training,
454
00:20:42,087 --> 00:20:44,307
I -- I got promoted
to captain.
455
00:20:44,351 --> 00:20:46,657
I get to keep my office,
you stay at your desk,
456
00:20:46,701 --> 00:20:48,790
and everything stays
exactly the same.
457
00:20:48,833 --> 00:20:50,357
Oh.
458
00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:52,968
You're under arrest for
the murder of Angie Tribeca.
459
00:20:54,752 --> 00:20:56,406
Murder?
460
00:20:56,450 --> 00:20:58,147
But that is her.
461
00:20:58,190 --> 00:21:00,584
We just received
some disturbing news.
462
00:21:00,628 --> 00:21:02,717
This is not Angie Tribeca.
463
00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:05,459
[ Dramatic music plays ]
464
00:21:19,777 --> 00:21:22,824
♪♪
33141
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof