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1
00:00:00,094 --> 00:00:02,314
♪ Good morning, good morning!
2
00:00:02,402 --> 00:00:03,960
♪ Sunbeams will soon smile through,
3
00:00:03,961 --> 00:00:05,842
♪ Good morning, good morning,
4
00:00:05,843 --> 00:00:08,482
♪ To you and you and you and you ♪
5
00:00:09,376 --> 00:00:12,656
Oh! Look, toast spoons!
6
00:00:14,736 --> 00:00:19,336
Oh, I'm feeling good about today.
It's got a sort of frisson about it.
7
00:00:19,337 --> 00:00:20,815
So, news.
8
00:00:21,048 --> 00:00:23,766
Mike and I are still together,
all good,
9
00:00:23,767 --> 00:00:27,168
but when he tells me he loves me,
I freak out, can't say it back.
10
00:00:27,169 --> 00:00:29,207
I love you.
11
00:00:29,208 --> 00:00:32,208
Oh, well, well done
and you're welcome and what a boost!
12
00:00:33,568 --> 00:00:35,807
It's a fan hand forsooth, sir!
13
00:00:35,808 --> 00:00:39,166
I need to workshop the issue with
Stevie but we've fallen out.
14
00:00:39,167 --> 00:00:41,728
Apparently I've ignored her
since having a boyfriend.
15
00:00:41,729 --> 00:00:44,047
Objection, my lord!
16
00:00:44,048 --> 00:00:46,568
Although at disco karaoke finals...
17
00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:54,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
18
00:01:02,048 --> 00:01:06,126
What else to impart? Mum's having
a tennis club dinner tonight.
19
00:01:06,127 --> 00:01:09,448
She doesn't want me there.
Apparently I let her down last year.
20
00:01:09,449 --> 00:01:11,247
Side bar, m'lord!
21
00:01:11,248 --> 00:01:13,288
Oh, I'll serve drinks.
22
00:01:17,768 --> 00:01:20,127
I don't know who this woman is.
23
00:01:20,128 --> 00:01:23,287
Right!
I declare this cheeky little day
24
00:01:23,288 --> 00:01:26,448
ready and open
for the business we call life!
25
00:01:26,482 --> 00:01:36,456
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
http://UKsubtitles.ru.
26
00:01:36,768 --> 00:01:39,006
Gary, look at you
in your own restaurant.
27
00:01:39,007 --> 00:01:40,367
Are you renaming it?
28
00:01:40,368 --> 00:01:42,726
What? "Gary's"?
What's wrong with Gary's?
29
00:01:42,727 --> 00:01:44,406
Well, it's like a greasy spoon.
30
00:01:44,407 --> 00:01:46,726
Yeah, it's like, it's like a chippy,
Gary's, isn't it?
31
00:01:46,727 --> 00:01:48,808
Yeah. No, seriously,
what are you calling it?
32
00:01:52,768 --> 00:01:55,608
That's lovely, no, that's perfect.
It's very you. It's very you.
33
00:01:55,609 --> 00:01:56,687
Manly, yeah.
34
00:01:56,688 --> 00:01:59,806
Manly? Good because now manning up
to put sign up.
35
00:01:59,807 --> 00:02:02,206
Good luck, man who gets nervous
voting for Strictly
36
00:02:02,207 --> 00:02:04,168
and is scared of mice and geese?
37
00:02:04,169 --> 00:02:06,447
It's the hissing. They hiss.
38
00:02:06,448 --> 00:02:08,368
Morning, Stevie, do you want to
join?
39
00:02:08,369 --> 00:02:09,848
Fine on my own.
40
00:02:11,128 --> 00:02:13,128
Struggling to get on the stool,
are we?
41
00:02:13,129 --> 00:02:17,327
Pretending this isn't our second
breakfast, are we? I won!
42
00:02:17,328 --> 00:02:19,086
Guys, I don't need this today!
43
00:02:19,087 --> 00:02:22,326
Our family dog, my dog, Daisy,
might have to be put down.
44
00:02:22,327 --> 00:02:24,888
But more importantly, hello,
restaurant opening tonight?
45
00:02:24,889 --> 00:02:26,167
More importantly?
46
00:02:26,168 --> 00:02:29,448
OK, can we all just calm it, please?
Everyone seems at odds. Just calm.
47
00:02:35,208 --> 00:02:38,248
Do you know what my favourite
three little words are?
48
00:02:38,249 --> 00:02:39,888
All day breakfast.
49
00:02:41,408 --> 00:02:42,806
I'm going to start doing it.
50
00:02:42,807 --> 00:02:45,366
It's the best thing since sliced
bread. It IS sliced bread.
51
00:02:45,367 --> 00:02:48,166
Then it's toasted
and an egg's popped on.
52
00:02:48,167 --> 00:02:51,968
Mike, please ask your girlfriend,
who loves you so much she... Well.
53
00:02:51,969 --> 00:02:56,528
Ignores best friends, if she would
for once share her pancakes?
54
00:02:58,248 --> 00:03:02,807
Oh, sorry about this!
Oh, no, I really am sorry.
55
00:03:02,808 --> 00:03:04,688
I mean, if I could stop, I would.
56
00:03:05,968 --> 00:03:07,647
Well, that is it.
57
00:03:07,648 --> 00:03:10,888
I will show you how angry I am
by my exit march.
58
00:03:10,889 --> 00:03:12,648
See my physical anger!
59
00:03:13,888 --> 00:03:17,287
Strutting like an ageing majorette,
are we?
60
00:03:17,288 --> 00:03:20,768
I'm going to have to dash.
I will see you later. OK.
61
00:03:20,769 --> 00:03:22,247
Mwah. I love you.
62
00:03:22,248 --> 00:03:23,848
Oh! Well, um...
63
00:03:26,968 --> 00:03:28,168
Hello?
64
00:03:34,048 --> 00:03:36,926
Thank you, Mike. I don't need a man
who cries about a dog to show me...
65
00:03:36,927 --> 00:03:39,046
Actually Daisy's been with us
for 15 years.
66
00:03:39,047 --> 00:03:40,928
How do you turn this turn on?
67
00:03:43,288 --> 00:03:46,528
It's not just me
that's finding this erotic, is it?
68
00:03:46,529 --> 00:03:48,968
Keep wielding, men!
69
00:03:51,808 --> 00:03:54,767
Stevie, Stevie, Stevie,
Stevie, Stevie...
70
00:03:54,768 --> 00:03:57,246
Mike just told me he loved me again
and I couldn't reply.
71
00:03:57,247 --> 00:04:00,128
Talk to the face cos the hand
ain't listening!
72
00:04:00,129 --> 00:04:02,367
It's the wrong way round. Yeah.
73
00:04:02,368 --> 00:04:04,286
Oh, come on, Stevie. I need you.
74
00:04:04,287 --> 00:04:06,568
We're like a sofa
and a little pouffe.
75
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:10,006
It's clean sheet night tonight.
76
00:04:10,007 --> 00:04:11,766
Who am I going to
change my duvet with?
77
00:04:11,767 --> 00:04:14,768
We could play Sheet Over Head Guess
What Fruit's Being Thrown At You?
78
00:04:14,769 --> 00:04:16,007
You love that!
79
00:04:16,008 --> 00:04:22,607
Delicious to talk to you, darling.
Lots of love, bye! Ghastly woman.
80
00:04:22,608 --> 00:04:24,247
Who is?
81
00:04:24,248 --> 00:04:27,968
You're still on speaker. She's
still there, she's still there.
82
00:04:27,969 --> 00:04:30,887
Ghastly woman I see before me...
83
00:04:30,888 --> 00:04:35,088
Er, y-yes, Miranda! Ha-ha-ha!
Bye, Belinda.
84
00:04:36,648 --> 00:04:38,966
She's convinced that my tennis
dinner
85
00:04:38,967 --> 00:04:41,366
won't be nearly as good as hers
last year.
86
00:04:41,367 --> 00:04:45,608
Over my yoga-plated, flab-free,
super firm, what-I-call buttocks.
87
00:04:45,609 --> 00:04:48,408
Now, do you think that Mike would...
88
00:04:55,368 --> 00:04:56,807
What's happening?
89
00:04:56,808 --> 00:05:00,767
Oh, Raymond Blanc! You look like
you're doing Riverdance.
90
00:05:00,768 --> 00:05:04,288
You'd be the same
if your pin-up suddenly walked in.
91
00:05:04,289 --> 00:05:07,407
Is Gary Barlow here?
Is Theo Paphitis here?
92
00:05:07,408 --> 00:05:09,168
Theo Paphitis?!
93
00:05:12,368 --> 00:05:14,288
I could ask Raymond to the dinner.
94
00:05:14,289 --> 00:05:18,287
If I got a celeb to the do,
in your face, Belinda!
95
00:05:18,288 --> 00:05:21,327
Bonjour, Monsieur Blanc.
96
00:05:21,328 --> 00:05:23,208
Bonjour, mademoiselle.
97
00:05:25,368 --> 00:05:29,208
Erm, je suis avoir un soiree.
98
00:05:30,648 --> 00:05:34,007
Je voudrais vous... tu?
99
00:05:34,008 --> 00:05:35,608
Sorry. Spat!
100
00:05:37,568 --> 00:05:40,327
Pour le mingling.
101
00:05:40,328 --> 00:05:43,968
And I can give you a good function.
102
00:05:46,208 --> 00:05:49,127
No, no, no, I don't mean...
Unless...
103
00:05:49,128 --> 00:05:51,367
Haw-hee-haw!
104
00:05:51,368 --> 00:05:52,568
Pardon!
105
00:05:54,048 --> 00:05:55,767
He's going.
106
00:05:55,768 --> 00:05:57,647
Don't start stalking again!
107
00:05:57,648 --> 00:06:01,046
I'll observe with binoculars
at the minimum distance
108
00:06:01,047 --> 00:06:03,488
as laid down
by Barry Manilow's lawyers.
109
00:06:05,648 --> 00:06:07,688
I presume you're still not
speaking to me.
110
00:06:07,689 --> 00:06:09,287
So, as your superior,
111
00:06:09,288 --> 00:06:12,368
I would like you to send off
this letter to British Gas.
112
00:06:12,369 --> 00:06:13,408
Thanking you.
113
00:06:14,528 --> 00:06:18,688
Tripped. I meant to. I meant to
go up the stairs like this.
114
00:06:22,128 --> 00:06:25,448
Right! OK, I can change
a duvet cover on my own.
115
00:06:25,449 --> 00:06:27,928
Don't need her help, it's fine.
116
00:06:30,568 --> 00:06:32,847
Stevie!
117
00:06:32,848 --> 00:06:34,368
I can't find the right corners!
118
00:06:36,248 --> 00:06:39,287
Stevie! Be my friend again?
119
00:06:39,288 --> 00:06:43,128
♪ If somebody's pulling a duvet
cover on, she's the one ♪
120
00:06:43,129 --> 00:06:45,008
♪ She's the one-hoh-hon! ♪
121
00:06:47,608 --> 00:06:49,968
Wallet, wallet,
where, where, where, where?
122
00:06:49,969 --> 00:06:51,687
Table, table, table.
123
00:06:51,688 --> 00:06:53,847
Everyone's at odds, odds, odds!
124
00:06:53,848 --> 00:06:56,848
Seriously now, Stevie, what happens
if he says "I love you" again?
125
00:06:56,849 --> 00:06:58,647
OK, this is code red.
126
00:06:58,648 --> 00:07:01,768
Amber alert rising to pink,
dogger moving east, showers later.
127
00:07:01,769 --> 00:07:04,167
That's the shipping forecast!
128
00:07:04,168 --> 00:07:06,406
You! How do I tell someone
I love them?
129
00:07:06,407 --> 00:07:08,926
Oh, um, write it on a muffin
and give it to him.
130
00:07:08,927 --> 00:07:11,006
Well, even if
I knew how to make a muffin,
131
00:07:11,007 --> 00:07:13,526
I wouldn't have time to make
a muffin. He's upstairs!
132
00:07:13,527 --> 00:07:14,968
I didn't know that! Think!
133
00:07:14,969 --> 00:07:17,927
Sorry I shouted. Crazy day.
134
00:07:17,928 --> 00:07:20,807
Um, I... No, I'll tell you later.
135
00:07:20,808 --> 00:07:24,127
I love you. Well, I, erm, I...
136
00:07:24,128 --> 00:07:25,487
I...
137
00:07:25,488 --> 00:07:29,048
♪ Eyes are to see with,
noses are to smell with ♪
138
00:07:33,808 --> 00:07:35,647
That was your fault.
139
00:07:35,648 --> 00:07:38,686
Right, help me workshop
why I can't say I love you.
140
00:07:38,687 --> 00:07:41,046
Stay and hang. No, I really
should be... STAY AND HANG!
141
00:07:41,047 --> 00:07:44,766
Right, well, what springs to mind
when I say, "what do you love?"
142
00:07:44,767 --> 00:07:48,488
Good, liking this. Don't worry,
Stevie, I've got a new friend.
143
00:07:50,688 --> 00:07:53,488
Strutting like a toddler
modelling Baby Gap, are we?
144
00:07:55,088 --> 00:07:58,127
Right. OK, what do you love?
145
00:07:58,128 --> 00:08:00,928
Doughnuts. Again,
what was your first love?
146
00:08:00,929 --> 00:08:02,607
Doughnuts.
147
00:08:02,608 --> 00:08:04,968
More emotional.
What makes your heart skip?
148
00:08:04,969 --> 00:08:06,007
Doughnuts.
149
00:08:06,008 --> 00:08:07,326
I think I know what this means.
150
00:08:07,327 --> 00:08:10,208
You're not in love your boyfriend.
Only fair to split up with him.
151
00:08:10,209 --> 00:08:14,767
What? What?
You can't leave me with that!
152
00:08:14,768 --> 00:08:18,648
Oh, my lovely Mike!
I'm going to beanbag.
153
00:08:20,088 --> 00:08:22,847
Stevie! Stevie!
154
00:08:22,848 --> 00:08:24,247
Miranda?
155
00:08:24,248 --> 00:08:27,247
He said... All right, calm.
156
00:08:27,248 --> 00:08:30,446
Now, step back! I'm Miranda's
number one workshopper.
157
00:08:30,447 --> 00:08:33,768
She's emotionally constipated
and I'm her metaphorical prune.
158
00:08:35,048 --> 00:08:36,967
She's back. Love oo!
159
00:08:36,968 --> 00:08:38,567
Love oo! Love oo!
160
00:08:38,568 --> 00:08:40,047
No!
161
00:08:40,048 --> 00:08:43,247
Now, as this suggests,
162
00:08:43,248 --> 00:08:45,846
Mike is not what makes
your heart skip.
163
00:08:45,847 --> 00:08:48,408
I mean you love him
but you're not in love with him.
164
00:08:48,409 --> 00:08:52,367
That's why you can't say it.
I'm right, aren't I?
165
00:08:52,368 --> 00:08:53,687
Yes.
166
00:08:53,688 --> 00:08:55,087
Oh, my Marple!
167
00:08:55,088 --> 00:08:57,326
Now, we need to work out
how you'll end it.
168
00:08:57,327 --> 00:09:00,086
Can't she just tell him?
Just tell him? This guy!
169
00:09:00,087 --> 00:09:02,728
Miranda can't be direct.
It's a condition.
170
00:09:02,729 --> 00:09:07,687
I call it Pushy Mother-itis
and Acute Englishness-ness-ness.
171
00:09:07,688 --> 00:09:10,566
She had to write a letter
to switch gas suppliers.
172
00:09:10,567 --> 00:09:11,726
Too scared to ring.
173
00:09:11,727 --> 00:09:14,526
They make me feel guilty. I end up
signed to all protection plans
174
00:09:14,527 --> 00:09:17,566
and offering them a place to stay
if they ever visit from Mumbai.
175
00:09:17,567 --> 00:09:20,048
I mean to be fair,
Raj and Miri were very nice.
176
00:09:20,049 --> 00:09:22,127
Oh, they were lovely.
177
00:09:22,128 --> 00:09:24,406
I'm gonna have to write
Mike a letter, it's only way.
178
00:09:24,407 --> 00:09:27,126
It's too mean!
Come on. Think and pace.
179
00:09:27,127 --> 00:09:28,888
No, I really should...
THINK AND PACE!
180
00:09:34,168 --> 00:09:36,006
Well, we've run out of options.
181
00:09:36,007 --> 00:09:38,728
Well, I've written him that letter.
You can't send that.
182
00:09:38,729 --> 00:09:41,287
Why can't you be less mimsy?
183
00:09:41,288 --> 00:09:44,848
What's going on? She can't be direct
because of a pushy mother.
184
00:09:44,849 --> 00:09:47,807
She loves very much!
185
00:09:47,808 --> 00:09:50,208
That's my mother. Oh, heavens above!
186
00:09:50,209 --> 00:09:53,087
We don't know.
187
00:09:53,088 --> 00:09:54,247
I'm not pushy.
188
00:09:54,248 --> 00:09:58,166
Miranda, you are to drop everything
and order Mike to help me tonight.
189
00:09:58,167 --> 00:10:01,726
I can't find Raymond but Mike could
get us news coverage for the dinner.
190
00:10:01,727 --> 00:10:03,128
Isn't that Raymond Blanc?
191
00:10:03,129 --> 00:10:07,208
Where? Where?
Oh, get out of the way!
192
00:10:09,448 --> 00:10:11,366
What's going on? We're workshopping
193
00:10:11,367 --> 00:10:14,008
because she realises
she doesn't love Mike.
194
00:10:14,009 --> 00:10:15,847
Mike Owen! Mike Owen!
195
00:10:15,848 --> 00:10:18,207
Mark Owen. I don't love Mark Owen.
196
00:10:18,208 --> 00:10:20,287
Nor do I. I love Gary Barlow!
197
00:10:20,288 --> 00:10:22,368
That's Mike.
This is a nightmare!
198
00:10:23,568 --> 00:10:25,606
She loves Gary Barlow.
I love Mark Owen.
199
00:10:25,607 --> 00:10:27,528
He loves Mark Owen.
I love Robbie Williams.
200
00:10:27,529 --> 00:10:30,488
We're setting up
a Take That tribute band.
201
00:10:31,648 --> 00:10:35,407
♪ Never forget
where you're coming from
202
00:10:35,408 --> 00:10:38,927
♪ Never pretend
that it's all real. ♪
203
00:10:38,928 --> 00:10:41,087
It's too much.
204
00:10:41,088 --> 00:10:44,008
Right. I forgot I need a tie.
I left one here.
205
00:10:44,009 --> 00:10:47,727
And, er, we need to have
a talk at some point.
206
00:10:47,728 --> 00:10:50,246
Ah, but what does
he need to talk about?
207
00:10:50,247 --> 00:10:53,206
If I'm not mistaken
he's got proposey eyes.
208
00:10:53,207 --> 00:10:55,486
Don't be ridiculous,
she's splitting up with him.
209
00:10:55,487 --> 00:10:56,766
Oh, but I'm still mimsy.
210
00:10:56,767 --> 00:10:59,128
The thought of telling him,
he's so gorgeous.
211
00:11:01,688 --> 00:11:05,048
And the other thing is... well now
it looks like I'm talking to no-one!
212
00:11:06,648 --> 00:11:09,408
Mike, listen,
I need to talk to you actually.
213
00:11:09,409 --> 00:11:14,687
I love being with you but, erm, I
just feel that I need a breather...
214
00:11:14,688 --> 00:11:17,447
Breeder. Breeder. Dog breeder.
215
00:11:17,448 --> 00:11:19,287
Horses. Horse dogs.
216
00:11:19,288 --> 00:11:21,008
I'm going to breed horse dogs.
217
00:11:21,009 --> 00:11:23,007
Yeah. Dogs that you can ride.
218
00:11:23,008 --> 00:11:26,088
Dog dressage. Neigh! Woof!
219
00:11:28,328 --> 00:11:31,166
Sorry, I'm all over the place
like soap in a shower.
220
00:11:31,167 --> 00:11:34,408
Where is it? Where's the soap?
Where has it gone?
221
00:11:35,408 --> 00:11:39,488
Right, OK, hang on,
it says it all there.
222
00:11:42,168 --> 00:11:47,527
OK, well, it's a bold decision
but I understand.
223
00:11:47,528 --> 00:11:50,608
You do? Yeah, if you want to leave
British Gas it's your call.
224
00:11:50,609 --> 00:11:52,727
Wrong letter! Wrong letter!
225
00:11:52,728 --> 00:11:54,767
Wrong letter! Wrong letter!
226
00:11:54,768 --> 00:11:57,968
Follow him! Emergency walk! Go!
227
00:12:04,448 --> 00:12:07,367
Mike. Mike. Hi, listen.
228
00:12:07,368 --> 00:12:09,806
You know you were talking
about working abroad? Mm-hmm?
229
00:12:09,807 --> 00:12:12,528
Well, maybe that's a good idea.
Oh, my.
230
00:12:12,529 --> 00:12:13,887
I'm so sorry.
231
00:12:13,888 --> 00:12:16,488
It's Raymond Blanc.
I'm a massive fan!
232
00:12:17,928 --> 00:12:20,248
My name's Michael Jackford...
233
00:12:27,728 --> 00:12:31,486
Today was meant to be a good day,
it had a frisson about it.
234
00:12:31,487 --> 00:12:34,728
I should go. I don't even know
why I'm still here.
235
00:12:34,729 --> 00:12:37,007
Hi. Oh, are you OK?
236
00:12:37,008 --> 00:12:40,047
Oh, stressed!
Um, cooking, deliveries...
237
00:12:40,048 --> 00:12:42,206
Rose is texting
even though we're not together.
238
00:12:42,207 --> 00:12:45,446
She still wants to come tonight.
Listen I really need your help.
239
00:12:45,447 --> 00:12:47,286
Could you spare
a few hours this afternoon?
240
00:12:47,287 --> 00:12:50,288
Yeah, sure, I'll come over later.
Oh, thank you, thank you!
241
00:12:51,728 --> 00:12:55,848
Oh! And by the way,
man has put up sign.
242
00:12:58,448 --> 00:12:59,608
Don't laugh.
243
00:13:00,968 --> 00:13:03,888
I wouldn't laugh.
It's one of the reasons I love you.
244
00:13:03,889 --> 00:13:05,727
What did you just say?
245
00:13:05,728 --> 00:13:08,766
I just said "I love you"
but I mean, just flippantly.
How I say it to you.
246
00:13:08,767 --> 00:13:11,206
Well, that's where you're
mistaken, my massive friend.
247
00:13:11,207 --> 00:13:14,328
We say it in a silly way.
Look, tell me you love me.
248
00:13:14,329 --> 00:13:16,367
Love oo.
249
00:13:16,368 --> 00:13:20,168
Please say you're finally getting
this. What truly makes your
heart skip?
250
00:13:21,808 --> 00:13:23,167
Gary.
251
00:13:23,168 --> 00:13:24,608
How do you see Mike?
252
00:13:25,808 --> 00:13:27,408
There we go.
253
00:13:30,968 --> 00:13:32,088
How do you see Gary?
254
00:13:44,528 --> 00:13:47,367
Who do you love?
255
00:13:47,368 --> 00:13:49,727
Gary. I'm in love with Gary!
256
00:13:49,728 --> 00:13:52,528
Yes! I've been waiting three years
for this. She said "I love you".
257
00:13:52,529 --> 00:13:53,567
To who?
258
00:13:53,568 --> 00:13:57,727
Gary. I love Gary!
I'm in love with Gary!
259
00:13:57,728 --> 00:13:58,887
Who's Gary?
260
00:13:58,888 --> 00:14:03,847
♪ I'm on the top of the
world looking down on creation...
261
00:14:03,848 --> 00:14:07,607
Who's Gary? ♪ And the only
explanation I can find... ♪
262
00:14:07,608 --> 00:14:09,366
I demand to know who Gary is!
263
00:14:09,367 --> 00:14:12,206
He's an old friend from uni.
She's always loved him.
264
00:14:12,207 --> 00:14:15,086
I want to tell him. Do you think he
feels the same? Of course he does!
265
00:14:15,087 --> 00:14:17,846
The minute Mike told you he loved
you, I clocked Gary's face.
266
00:14:17,847 --> 00:14:19,766
♪ And the love that I've found... ♪
267
00:14:19,767 --> 00:14:22,886
But wait, wait! You have to split up
with Mike before you tell Gary.
268
00:14:22,887 --> 00:14:25,406
Oh, how? Focus. Knock out your
mimsy.
269
00:14:25,407 --> 00:14:29,448
Hope that's not a euphemism!
Concentrate! Love is at stake.
270
00:14:29,449 --> 00:14:31,248
This is serious now!
271
00:14:32,608 --> 00:14:34,207
I am a direct woman.
272
00:14:34,208 --> 00:14:38,246
I am soft, strong and very, very
long... no, that's loo paper!
273
00:14:38,247 --> 00:14:42,488
Hi, I got your text. Great - listen,
I need to speak to you. Um, OK.
274
00:14:42,489 --> 00:14:45,447
Right, here is the thing, Mike.
275
00:14:45,448 --> 00:14:48,248
You are an amazing man
and a wonderful boyfriend,
276
00:14:48,249 --> 00:14:49,888
but I have to end...
277
00:14:50,968 --> 00:14:53,647
Oh! Sorry. Oh, it's Dad.
278
00:14:53,648 --> 00:14:56,607
Oh, no! Daisy's gone. Oh!
279
00:14:56,608 --> 00:14:59,606
Sorry, I know she's only a dog,
but I'm gonna have to go.
280
00:14:59,607 --> 00:15:02,206
Sorry, what were you saying?
Oh, it's not important now.
281
00:15:02,207 --> 00:15:04,048
Something about having to end.
282
00:15:04,049 --> 00:15:08,927
Having to end a contract with BT
and move to a new broadband package.
283
00:15:08,928 --> 00:15:11,006
That's what you wanted to tell me?
284
00:15:11,007 --> 00:15:12,928
It's been very difficult, Mike!
285
00:15:14,848 --> 00:15:17,368
This is getting out of control.
I'm having to act!
286
00:15:19,528 --> 00:15:21,246
Aah, Mike, she's told you.
287
00:15:21,247 --> 00:15:23,926
About moving to a new broadband
package, yes!
288
00:15:23,927 --> 00:15:28,328
Oh, yes, yes, tough times.
Mike's upset because his dog
just died just now.
289
00:15:28,329 --> 00:15:33,087
Oh, that is so annoying! Typical.
Isn't that annoying? Who's this?
290
00:15:33,088 --> 00:15:35,127
We don't know.
291
00:15:35,128 --> 00:15:38,406
I was about to say it. I'm ready to
explode, like an emotional balloon.
292
00:15:38,407 --> 00:15:44,086
Calm, you don't need to tell Gary
now. The only reason to panic was
if Rose was getting her claws in.
293
00:15:44,087 --> 00:15:47,608
She's been texting!
He's not interested, so wait till
Mike feels better!
294
00:15:47,609 --> 00:15:48,687
Who's Rose?
295
00:15:48,688 --> 00:15:53,208
Is everything all right?
She's an emotional balloon
because she's in love with Gary.
296
00:15:53,209 --> 00:15:57,047
Gary Barlow! She loves Gary Barlow.
I love Gary Barlow.
297
00:15:57,048 --> 00:16:00,966
That's Gary! Why does it keep
happening? She loves Robbie
Williams.
298
00:16:00,967 --> 00:16:04,368
I love Mark Owen.
We're a Take That Tribute band.
299
00:16:04,369 --> 00:16:07,047
♪ Relight my fire
300
00:16:07,048 --> 00:16:09,768
♪ Your love is my only desi... ♪
301
00:16:11,528 --> 00:16:14,608
Lovely. Miranda - just a quick one.
Yes, please!
302
00:16:17,328 --> 00:16:20,766
I thought you were coming to help?
You clearly you didn't mean it,
so you know what?
303
00:16:20,767 --> 00:16:22,128
Don't bother, Rose is coming.
304
00:16:29,128 --> 00:16:31,967
I couldn't love him more.
Stupid Rose!
305
00:16:31,968 --> 00:16:34,128
Now, I demand to know who Rose is.
306
00:16:34,129 --> 00:16:35,528
Gary's ex. Keep up!
307
00:16:36,888 --> 00:16:39,886
Well, you have to tell Gary now.
Rose can't get there first.
308
00:16:39,887 --> 00:16:43,406
You can't miss the one thing that
makes you happiest in the world.
309
00:16:43,407 --> 00:16:45,928
If I had a chance with my Gary
I'd have...
310
00:16:45,929 --> 00:16:50,287
♪ One night,
one night in heaven... ♪
311
00:16:50,288 --> 00:16:55,087
Oh, well. You have done yourself
proud with this. I know.
312
00:16:55,088 --> 00:16:58,088
OK, I'm gonna tell him.
Febreze me out.
313
00:17:05,408 --> 00:17:07,488
Oh, we're not open till seven,
sorry.
314
00:17:07,489 --> 00:17:09,687
It's me. Oh, hi.
315
00:17:09,688 --> 00:17:12,688
Hi. Listen, I'm so sorry
I let you down earlier
316
00:17:12,689 --> 00:17:16,847
but by way of an apology
I want to tell you that...
317
00:17:16,848 --> 00:17:20,608
well, Gary, I know I've being seeing
Mike, but I realise now that...
318
00:17:21,728 --> 00:17:23,247
Gary Preston...
319
00:17:23,248 --> 00:17:27,167
Oh, my. Miranda, I don't believe it.
320
00:17:27,168 --> 00:17:28,847
Well, let me say it.
321
00:17:28,848 --> 00:17:30,008
It's Raymond Blanc!
322
00:17:31,848 --> 00:17:34,407
Raymond bloody Blanc!
323
00:17:34,408 --> 00:17:37,048
I'll Michel Roux
the day I ever met you!
324
00:17:37,049 --> 00:17:41,887
Oh! That was quite clever, wasn't
it? You keep messing up my life.
325
00:17:41,888 --> 00:17:44,848
And I am hiding from a
crazy woman.
326
00:17:45,968 --> 00:17:48,966
Mr Blanc, Mr Blanc, hello,
ooh, sorry, a bit starstruck,
327
00:17:48,967 --> 00:17:52,526
it's actually my restaurant opening
tonight, do you think you might be
able to come?
328
00:17:52,527 --> 00:17:55,808
Actually I'm looking for a
restaurant to meet a friend tonight.
329
00:17:55,809 --> 00:17:57,207
Amazing!
330
00:17:57,208 --> 00:17:59,527
Non, non, non!
331
00:17:59,528 --> 00:18:03,047
Raymond!
332
00:18:03,048 --> 00:18:07,727
Come to mon tennis dinner!
333
00:18:07,728 --> 00:18:13,248
I have no idea who this woman is.
Such fun!
334
00:18:15,008 --> 00:18:17,607
Ray ruddy White!
335
00:18:17,608 --> 00:18:19,408
I have to get in there before Rose.
336
00:18:19,409 --> 00:18:23,247
She romances Gary.
She gets him with sweeping gestures.
337
00:18:23,248 --> 00:18:24,687
Think!
338
00:18:24,688 --> 00:18:26,568
Ooh, you've got to out-Rose Rose.
339
00:18:26,569 --> 00:18:29,807
Oh, yes! Romance is my area.
340
00:18:29,808 --> 00:18:32,487
I'm thinking picnic, champers, doves.
341
00:18:32,488 --> 00:18:37,007
Such is my allure,
I naturally woo with every sense.
342
00:18:37,008 --> 00:18:39,566
The smell of my skin,
the touch of my clothes,
343
00:18:39,567 --> 00:18:41,086
the sight of my cleavage.
344
00:18:41,087 --> 00:18:42,966
Excuse me, I am the woo-er here!
345
00:18:42,967 --> 00:18:45,606
Well, I thought you were
desperate for my help, but do go on.
346
00:18:45,607 --> 00:18:48,406
Fine, I will - I can do this,
I can woo with my every sense.
347
00:18:48,407 --> 00:18:51,006
The touch of my clothes,
the, what was it?
348
00:18:51,007 --> 00:18:54,486
The smell of my underwear,
the sound of my cleavage.
349
00:18:54,487 --> 00:18:55,886
OK, that's wrong. You do it!
350
00:18:55,887 --> 00:19:00,168
Meet Gary in the park in two hours.
This is the best day of my life!
351
00:19:00,169 --> 00:19:01,688
Bit weird.
352
00:19:03,408 --> 00:19:06,608
When did it get
so hard to sit on the floor?
353
00:19:09,248 --> 00:19:10,727
Hi!
354
00:19:10,728 --> 00:19:12,768
What's all this?
I thought I was meeting Stevie.
355
00:19:12,769 --> 00:19:17,047
It's a gesture. From me.
Not Stevie.
356
00:19:17,048 --> 00:19:18,966
Well, that's very kind
but I'm really busy.
357
00:19:18,967 --> 00:19:20,128
No, Gary, wait, wait.
358
00:19:22,128 --> 00:19:27,568
Well, I thought you might need
a break and I wanted to say I'm
so sorry about not helping.
359
00:19:28,728 --> 00:19:30,888
OK. All right. Thank you.
360
00:19:34,928 --> 00:19:36,288
Can you hear music?
361
00:19:39,608 --> 00:19:42,887
No. No. No, look, um, look down.
362
00:19:42,888 --> 00:19:43,966
Look at this cream!
363
00:19:43,967 --> 00:19:45,968
What? I don't want to look at...
364
00:19:45,969 --> 00:19:48,527
Really closely, Gary. Oh, sorry.
365
00:19:48,528 --> 00:19:49,887
Thank you.
366
00:19:49,888 --> 00:19:52,088
Sorry. Sorry, cream nose.
367
00:19:58,048 --> 00:20:00,048
Where did the geese come from?!
368
00:20:05,928 --> 00:20:08,127
Ooh, they are scary.
369
00:20:08,128 --> 00:20:11,887
Stevie! I couldn't get doves!
370
00:20:11,888 --> 00:20:13,408
Is this your idea of a joke?
371
00:20:21,568 --> 00:20:22,807
They've gone.
372
00:20:22,808 --> 00:20:24,608
They're back!
373
00:20:28,168 --> 00:20:29,607
Ooh, they are scary!
374
00:20:29,608 --> 00:20:30,648
It's the hissing!
375
00:20:32,808 --> 00:20:34,768
I was trying to tell you something.
376
00:20:34,769 --> 00:20:37,407
Oh, Miranda, only you. Just tell me!
377
00:20:37,408 --> 00:20:39,887
OK. Oh, I can't look at you!
378
00:20:39,888 --> 00:20:42,607
What? Oh,
this is important, isn't it?
379
00:20:42,608 --> 00:20:45,408
Just let me just get this
cream from out of my nose.
380
00:20:49,568 --> 00:20:52,607
Hi. OK, listen. Here's the thing.
381
00:20:52,608 --> 00:20:55,326
And I'm sorry I've been going
about it in such a roundabout way,
382
00:20:55,327 --> 00:20:59,368
particularly as I've never been
so certain of anything in my life.
383
00:21:00,688 --> 00:21:04,167
I am absolutely, ridiculously,
384
00:21:04,168 --> 00:21:07,448
embarrassingly in love with you.
385
00:21:09,968 --> 00:21:12,047
Oh! Mike!
386
00:21:12,048 --> 00:21:14,288
And I was just going to
say guess who?
387
00:21:14,289 --> 00:21:16,767
OK, what is it? Moment's gone!
388
00:21:16,768 --> 00:21:18,126
I've been waiting to hear that.
389
00:21:18,127 --> 00:21:21,726
Well, it was lucky you were here
then. Why were you here then?
390
00:21:21,727 --> 00:21:24,566
Oh, Mike, now, about my dinner.
Oh, mother!
391
00:21:24,567 --> 00:21:27,288
Penny, there's something
I need to ask Miranda's father.
392
00:21:27,289 --> 00:21:29,047
Proposey eyes!
393
00:21:29,048 --> 00:21:30,806
Oh, table! I've just laid that!
394
00:21:30,807 --> 00:21:33,408
He wants to speak to your father.
Oh, darling!
395
00:21:35,088 --> 00:21:36,687
Oh, no! It's Rose.
396
00:21:36,688 --> 00:21:38,448
Do something!
397
00:21:43,208 --> 00:21:45,247
How does that help?
398
00:21:45,248 --> 00:21:48,926
Well, I'm clearly in the way,
I didn't realise you two were...
399
00:21:48,927 --> 00:21:52,246
Yeah. So, you know, bye. Wait, I
don't even know why she kissed me!
400
00:21:52,247 --> 00:21:55,246
Well, it looked pretty passionate
to me, you lingered.
401
00:21:55,247 --> 00:21:56,966
Agreed m'lord, there was lingering.
402
00:21:56,967 --> 00:21:59,008
I thought there was lingering.
Who are you?
403
00:21:59,009 --> 00:22:00,048
I don't know.
404
00:22:01,888 --> 00:22:03,048
You both lingered!
405
00:22:03,049 --> 00:22:04,328
We did not linger!
406
00:22:05,848 --> 00:22:06,927
Rose! Miranda!
407
00:22:06,928 --> 00:22:09,287
Sweeping out.
408
00:22:09,288 --> 00:22:10,727
Oh, ice!
409
00:22:10,728 --> 00:22:12,768
You know when you nearly go,
I nearly went.
410
00:22:12,769 --> 00:22:13,968
Oh, I've gone!
411
00:22:15,528 --> 00:22:17,047
You kissed my Gary.
412
00:22:17,048 --> 00:22:19,086
How would you like it
if I kissed yours?
413
00:22:19,087 --> 00:22:21,406
I'm going to get my own back
and snog Gary Barlow -
414
00:22:21,407 --> 00:22:24,086
OK, that's never going to happen.
I was trying to get rid of her.
415
00:22:24,087 --> 00:22:25,766
Well, you shouldn't have interfered.
416
00:22:25,767 --> 00:22:29,888
Didn't want to but "Stevie, I can't
cope, we're a sofa and a little
pouffe".
417
00:22:42,688 --> 00:22:44,686
Right, you, whatever
your name is,
418
00:22:44,687 --> 00:22:47,008
I bequeath you
the status of my new best friend.
419
00:22:47,009 --> 00:22:48,767
Oh, it's too much!
420
00:22:48,768 --> 00:22:51,368
Change the duvet with me, please.
Oh, now!
421
00:22:53,688 --> 00:22:58,248
Darling, darling. Mike's just
spoken to your father. He's
going to propose.
422
00:22:58,249 --> 00:22:59,727
You will say yes?
423
00:22:59,728 --> 00:23:01,926
No, she can't marry a man
she doesn't really love.
424
00:23:01,927 --> 00:23:04,486
What she needs is someone who
knows her and gets her.
425
00:23:04,487 --> 00:23:09,486
What she needs is someone who doesn't
know her and will only know what he's
getting when it's too late!
426
00:23:09,487 --> 00:23:11,088
Am I here? I think I'm here.
427
00:23:11,089 --> 00:23:12,487
Miranda? >
428
00:23:12,488 --> 00:23:14,768
Hide, hide, hide! Hide.
429
00:23:15,968 --> 00:23:18,327
Hide... Hi-de-hi!
430
00:23:18,328 --> 00:23:19,847
Hi, can we talk?
431
00:23:19,848 --> 00:23:23,046
Yeah sure, um, what would
you like to talk about?
432
00:23:23,047 --> 00:23:25,928
I'm worried about the Greek economy.
Discuss.
433
00:23:37,848 --> 00:23:39,367
What are you doing?
434
00:23:39,368 --> 00:23:40,768
Tying my shoelace.
435
00:23:42,128 --> 00:23:43,207
Phew! Sugar!
436
00:23:43,208 --> 00:23:47,848
What? Few sugars I shall
make in your tea now for you. Yes.
437
00:23:49,768 --> 00:23:51,928
Is that a barn owl?
438
00:23:54,528 --> 00:23:57,848
Just forget about the tea.
Will you just sit for one moment?
439
00:23:57,849 --> 00:24:01,128
You're so skittish today.
Like a little pony.
440
00:24:02,448 --> 00:24:06,126
So listen, I know we've only been
seeing each other for a few weeks
441
00:24:06,127 --> 00:24:08,408
but I've been
thinking about the future.
442
00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:11,767
Hi, can I speak to Miranda please?
443
00:24:11,768 --> 00:24:17,366
Yes. Oh, hi, I'm from BT. I'm really
sorry you're not happy at the
moment. Oh, listen, I did mean it.
444
00:24:17,367 --> 00:24:21,488
It's not you, it's me, I just want
to be with someone else. Bye.
445
00:24:21,489 --> 00:24:24,527
Yay, mimsy-less! Disappointing!
446
00:24:24,528 --> 00:24:26,247
What are you doing here?
447
00:24:26,248 --> 00:24:29,326
They are here to wish me
well, er, for letting go of BT.
448
00:24:29,327 --> 00:24:30,928
So why were you in the bathroom?
449
00:24:30,929 --> 00:24:34,407
We urgently needed the loo.
We didn't go together.
450
00:24:34,408 --> 00:24:37,527
I went first. I followed through.
451
00:24:37,528 --> 00:24:40,887
OK. Bye then, guys.
Thanks so much for coming.
452
00:24:40,888 --> 00:24:44,446
Look, I don't know what's going on
here but will you just listen to me
before I burst?
453
00:24:44,447 --> 00:24:47,328
Wait, Mike, listen, I'm in love
with... I've taken a job in Africa.
454
00:24:48,368 --> 00:24:49,407
What?
455
00:24:49,408 --> 00:24:53,126
But I mean, after what you
said at the restaurant, just say
if you don't want me to go.
456
00:24:53,127 --> 00:24:55,566
Oh, no you must go,
it's what you've always wanted.
457
00:24:55,567 --> 00:24:59,888
What were you...? You're in love
with...? In love with Talk Talk for
my new ISP.
458
00:25:01,528 --> 00:25:06,006
I have never known a family so
emotional about service providers.
459
00:25:06,007 --> 00:25:07,286
Oh, I'll miss you, Marple.
460
00:25:07,287 --> 00:25:10,808
Oh, I'll miss you so much, Quirky,
but let's talk, yeah?
461
00:25:10,809 --> 00:25:12,288
Yeah. Bye.
462
00:25:13,528 --> 00:25:14,608
Bye.
463
00:25:23,648 --> 00:25:25,127
Alone again.
464
00:25:25,128 --> 00:25:26,168
You've got me!
465
00:25:33,208 --> 00:25:35,088
Why aren't you at the tennis club?
466
00:25:35,089 --> 00:25:37,567
One glimpse of Belinda's smug face
467
00:25:37,568 --> 00:25:41,488
that it was a celeb and press-free,
mediocre event and I abandoned.
468
00:25:42,888 --> 00:25:46,606
Oh, Raymond's here! Evening,
Mr Blanc, thank you for coming.
469
00:25:46,607 --> 00:25:48,088
Your table is over 'ere.
470
00:25:50,128 --> 00:25:52,208
Pretend you're enjoying
yourself for Gary.
471
00:25:55,528 --> 00:25:56,568
What are you doing?!
472
00:25:56,569 --> 00:25:59,007
We're creating ambience.
473
00:25:59,008 --> 00:26:01,728
Can you just stay out of it, please?
Why are you so angry with me?
474
00:26:01,729 --> 00:26:03,927
Shush, Raymond is behind you!
475
00:26:03,928 --> 00:26:06,166
I don't care about Raymond.
He ruined my day.
476
00:26:06,167 --> 00:26:09,006
And you ruined mine.
The one day I needed your help.
477
00:26:09,007 --> 00:26:10,766
Well, maybe I had
urgent things to do.
478
00:26:10,767 --> 00:26:13,168
What, like rehearse a Take That
tribute band?
479
00:26:14,168 --> 00:26:17,046
You know, there's always something
with you, isn't there?
480
00:26:17,047 --> 00:26:20,086
On the one day I was struggling and
needed your help like you always do,
481
00:26:20,087 --> 00:26:23,088
your issues are still more important
although they very rarely are!
482
00:26:23,089 --> 00:26:25,687
They WERE more important! Oh, what?
483
00:26:25,688 --> 00:26:26,966
What was more important?
484
00:26:26,967 --> 00:26:29,606
Splitting up with my boyfriend and
telling you I'm completely
485
00:26:29,607 --> 00:26:32,248
and utterly head over heels in love
with you, I love you!
486
00:26:38,808 --> 00:26:40,688
Oh, that's embarrassing.
487
00:26:42,008 --> 00:26:45,488
Do something more embarrassing
so it won't seem so embarrassing.
488
00:26:47,648 --> 00:26:50,807
♪ I'm a little coconut,
ugly and hairy
489
00:26:50,808 --> 00:26:54,368
♪ But when you crack me
open I ooze milk and nut.. ♪
490
00:26:55,808 --> 00:27:00,847
No, that's worse.
I have no idea who this woman is.
491
00:27:00,848 --> 00:27:04,727
Right, I'm just gonna flush
myself down a plug hole.
492
00:27:04,728 --> 00:27:07,408
You'll never guess who's here
to meet Raymond.
493
00:27:19,528 --> 00:27:24,847
Mr Gary Barlow, would you make an
appearance at my tennis club dinner?
494
00:27:24,848 --> 00:27:26,808
For you, anything.
495
00:27:29,728 --> 00:27:31,728
Take that, Blanc, we've got Barlow!
496
00:27:33,648 --> 00:27:35,008
Mr Gary Barlow.
497
00:27:44,808 --> 00:27:47,007
I lingered!
498
00:27:47,008 --> 00:27:48,048
Yes!
499
00:27:51,128 --> 00:27:54,168
He didn't say it back,
he could have said it back.
500
00:27:54,169 --> 00:27:55,247
You've got me.
501
00:27:55,248 --> 00:27:57,607
Love oo.
502
00:27:57,608 --> 00:28:01,368
And me. And our band.
Take That's on karaoke.
503
00:28:03,648 --> 00:28:08,207
♪ Whatever I said, whatever I did, I
didn't mean it
504
00:28:08,208 --> 00:28:10,567
♪ I just want you back for good
505
00:28:10,568 --> 00:28:13,007
♪ Want you back, want you back
506
00:28:13,008 --> 00:28:16,567
♪ I want you back for good
507
00:28:16,568 --> 00:28:20,486
♪ Whenever I'm wrong, just tell me
the song and I'll sing it
508
00:28:20,487 --> 00:28:22,648
♪ You'll be right and understood
509
00:28:22,649 --> 00:28:25,247
♪ Want you back, want you back
510
00:28:25,248 --> 00:28:28,248
♪ I want you back for good
511
00:28:29,448 --> 00:28:32,847
♪ Unaware but on the line
512
00:28:32,848 --> 00:28:35,327
♪ Figured out the story
513
00:28:35,328 --> 00:28:38,527
♪ No no, it wasn't good
514
00:28:38,528 --> 00:28:41,287
♪ No no... ♪
515
00:28:41,288 --> 00:28:43,888
You will have to leave at some
point. Yeah.
516
00:28:44,191 --> 00:29:11,403
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
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516
00:29:12,305 --> 00:29:18,640
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