Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:29,655 --> 00:00:34,826
♪ There's a brand-new baby
at our house ♪
2
00:00:34,952 --> 00:00:39,081
♪ The nicest little gift
we've ever had ♪
3
00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:41,792
♪ How much fuller
life's become ♪
4
00:00:41,917 --> 00:00:44,002
♪ No one knows
what makes it hum ♪
5
00:00:44,127 --> 00:00:48,340
♪ Till you call each other
Mommy and Dad ♪
6
00:00:48,465 --> 00:00:53,929
♪ There's a brand-new baby
at our house ♪
7
00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:57,975
♪ And though he's been there
just a little while ♪
8
00:00:58,100 --> 00:01:00,435
♪ In the parlor, in the hall ♪
9
00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:03,021
♪ Every picture on the wall ♪
10
00:01:03,146 --> 00:01:07,191
♪ Seems to know
because they all wear a smile ♪
11
00:01:07,316 --> 00:01:07,484
♪ I can't explain
what he does to my heart ♪
12
00:01:07,484 --> 00:01:12,656
♪ I can't explain
what he does to my heart ♪
13
00:01:12,781 --> 00:01:16,577
♪ With his infant charms ♪
14
00:01:16,702 --> 00:01:21,581
♪ I never knew what heaven was ♪
15
00:01:21,706 --> 00:01:26,253
♪ Till I held an angel
in my arms ♪
16
00:01:26,378 --> 00:01:31,133
♪ There's a brand-new baby
at our house ♪
17
00:01:31,258 --> 00:01:35,262
♪ He's twice as sweet as honey
from the comb ♪
18
00:01:35,387 --> 00:01:40,267
♪ He's the image of my spouse,
he's the tricky Mickey Mouse ♪
19
00:01:40,392 --> 00:01:44,229
♪ Who has changed
our happy house to a home ♪
20
00:01:44,354 --> 00:01:46,607
♪ We thank the Lord ♪
21
00:01:46,732 --> 00:01:49,276
♪ Whose love
and wondrous powers ♪
22
00:01:49,401 --> 00:01:51,778
♪ Gave us that brand-new ♪
23
00:01:51,903 --> 00:01:54,281
♪ Grand-new ♪
24
00:01:54,406 --> 00:02:00,203
♪ Baby of ours. ♪
25
00:02:00,329 --> 00:02:02,581
Oh, Ricky,
that was wonderful.
26
00:02:02,706 --> 00:02:03,582
That's great.
27
00:02:03,707 --> 00:02:05,292
Rick, did you really
write that song?
28
00:02:05,417 --> 00:02:06,501
Yeah. I wrote it for Lucy.
29
00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:08,002
I'm going to take it
down to the hospital
30
00:02:08,127 --> 00:02:09,421
and play it for her.
31
00:02:09,546 --> 00:02:11,632
See, I was recording it
while I was singing it.
32
00:02:11,757 --> 00:02:12,716
Oh, isn't that clever?
33
00:02:12,841 --> 00:02:14,092
Where did you
get this thing?
34
00:02:14,217 --> 00:02:17,054
Well, Lucy bought it to record
the baby's first words.
35
00:02:17,179 --> 00:02:18,764
How could she buy it
if she's in the hospital?
36
00:02:18,889 --> 00:02:20,931
Well, the lady in the next bed
37
00:02:21,058 --> 00:02:23,226
is a salesman
for the tape recorder company.
38
00:02:23,352 --> 00:02:24,227
[Ethel] What?
39
00:02:24,353 --> 00:02:25,270
Yeah, no kidding.
40
00:02:25,395 --> 00:02:27,522
This lady has a baby every year
41
00:02:27,648 --> 00:02:30,776
and she sells enough recorders
to pay for the baby.
42
00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:32,611
And you know
how Lucy is.
43
00:02:32,736 --> 00:02:34,112
We certainly do.
44
00:02:34,237 --> 00:02:36,156
Remember that
Handy Dandy Company?
45
00:02:36,281 --> 00:02:37,324
Ay-yi-yi.
46
00:02:37,449 --> 00:02:38,617
Oh, gee, I'll never forget
47
00:02:38,742 --> 00:02:40,744
the expression
on Lucy's face that morning
48
00:02:40,869 --> 00:02:42,579
when I brought
the mail up to her.
49
00:02:44,748 --> 00:02:46,124
Good morning, Lucy.
50
00:02:46,249 --> 00:02:47,626
Hi.
51
00:02:47,751 --> 00:02:49,461
What's the matter
with you?
52
00:02:49,586 --> 00:02:52,297
Oh, it's that Cuban sorehead
I'm married to.
53
00:02:52,422 --> 00:02:55,800
I just had my weekly lecture
about spending too much money.
54
00:02:55,925 --> 00:02:57,636
What'd he have
to say this time?
55
00:02:57,761 --> 00:02:59,221
I couldn't understand
most of it.
56
00:02:59,346 --> 00:03:01,889
All I could get was that pesos
don't grow on trees.
57
00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:05,644
Well, it's over
for another week.
58
00:03:05,769 --> 00:03:07,312
I brought up your mail.
59
00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:08,814
Good.
60
00:03:08,939 --> 00:03:10,315
What's this?
61
00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:11,817
Oh, no.
62
00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:13,776
Oh, I don't want Ricky to know
that I bought this.
63
00:03:13,901 --> 00:03:16,279
This is a kitchen gadget that I
saw demonstrated on television.
64
00:03:16,405 --> 00:03:17,489
Where can I hide it?
65
00:03:17,614 --> 00:03:19,074
How about the
refrigerator?
66
00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:20,575
That's a good idea.
67
00:03:20,701 --> 00:03:22,369
He'd never look in there.
68
00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:29,876
He'll never think of looking
in here in a million years.
69
00:03:30,001 --> 00:03:31,712
[Ethel whispering] No, I guess not.
70
00:03:35,006 --> 00:03:36,133
There, you think
that's safe?
71
00:03:36,258 --> 00:03:37,175
Yeah, I think it's safe.
72
00:03:37,300 --> 00:03:38,301
Ricky!
73
00:03:40,595 --> 00:03:42,264
What's in the package
you don't want me to see?
74
00:03:42,389 --> 00:03:43,306
Nothing.
75
00:03:43,432 --> 00:03:44,683
- Let me see the package.
- Nothing.
76
00:03:44,808 --> 00:03:46,017
Statue-of-liberty play, Ethel.
77
00:03:46,143 --> 00:03:47,477
Okay.
78
00:03:48,478 --> 00:03:50,272
Throw it here, Ethel!
79
00:03:54,985 --> 00:03:56,903
Now, Ricky, give
me that thing.
80
00:03:57,028 --> 00:03:58,405
That's mine, Ricky.
81
00:03:58,530 --> 00:03:59,906
Now, wait a minute.
Let me see.
82
00:04:00,031 --> 00:04:02,075
Let's see what's in the package.
83
00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:04,411
Let's see what's
in the package.
84
00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:13,044
What is it?
85
00:04:13,170 --> 00:04:14,796
It's a Handy Dandy
kitchen helper.
86
00:04:14,921 --> 00:04:16,630
I saw it demonstrated
on television.
87
00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:17,966
It's a tremendous bargain
88
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:20,677
when you think of all the things
you can do with it.
89
00:04:20,802 --> 00:04:21,970
How much is it?
90
00:04:22,095 --> 00:04:24,097
Uh, it rices, dices,
and splices.
91
00:04:24,222 --> 00:04:26,600
Lucy, how much?
92
00:04:26,725 --> 00:04:27,726
It cuts down on the time
93
00:04:27,851 --> 00:04:29,770
that a housewife has to spend
in the kitchen.
94
00:04:29,895 --> 00:04:30,771
How much?
95
00:04:30,896 --> 00:04:33,732
About two hours a day.
96
00:04:33,857 --> 00:04:35,233
Lucy...
97
00:04:35,358 --> 00:04:37,444
$7.98.
98
00:04:37,569 --> 00:04:39,779
$7.98!
99
00:04:39,904 --> 00:04:41,907
Yeah, but you'd think it was
cheap at twice the price
100
00:04:42,032 --> 00:04:42,908
if you saw all the things
101
00:04:43,033 --> 00:04:44,242
the man does with it
on television.
102
00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:45,994
I watch him every day.
Here, I'll show you.
103
00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:48,330
- [Fred] Ethel?
- Yeah.
104
00:04:48,455 --> 00:04:49,664
You'd better come down
and let me see
105
00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:51,374
what you want me to do
with that clothesline.
106
00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:52,416
Just a minute. Come on in.
107
00:04:52,541 --> 00:04:54,044
Lucy's going to give us
a demonstration.
108
00:04:54,169 --> 00:04:55,378
Of what?
109
00:04:55,504 --> 00:04:56,880
A woman's stupidity.
110
00:04:57,005 --> 00:04:58,924
That shouldn't take very long.
111
00:04:59,049 --> 00:05:00,884
All right, now you
all stand over there.
112
00:05:01,009 --> 00:05:02,886
Now, ladies and gentlemen
113
00:05:03,011 --> 00:05:06,431
I am about to demonstrate
the Handy Dandy kitchen helper.
114
00:05:06,556 --> 00:05:08,308
It's something
you shouldn't be without.
115
00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:10,017
It peels and splices,
cuts and rices
116
00:05:10,142 --> 00:05:11,603
skins and dices
at lowest prices.
117
00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:13,647
Now watch me closely,
ladies and gentlemen.
118
00:05:13,772 --> 00:05:16,440
I will set the dial
for French fries,
119
00:05:16,565 --> 00:05:18,860
and then by turning this handle,
120
00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:22,072
I will cut this potato
into 16 identical slices.
121
00:05:22,197 --> 00:05:24,241
Here we go.
122
00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:36,628
Oh, I must have had it set
for baked potato.
123
00:05:38,046 --> 00:05:39,422
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
124
00:05:39,548 --> 00:05:41,925
I didn't have it
right on French fries.
125
00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:44,636
That was it.
126
00:05:44,761 --> 00:05:46,263
Here we go.
127
00:05:54,813 --> 00:05:57,065
16 identical slices.
128
00:05:57,190 --> 00:06:00,485
It looked so easy when the man
did it on television.
129
00:06:00,610 --> 00:06:02,654
Oh, honey, maybe you just
haven't got the hang of it yet.
130
00:06:02,779 --> 00:06:03,779
Well, I did what
they told me.
131
00:06:03,904 --> 00:06:06,157
Honestly, Fred,
why is it that women
132
00:06:06,283 --> 00:06:08,702
have no sales resistance
whatsoever?
133
00:06:08,827 --> 00:06:10,996
I don't know.
They'll buy anything.
134
00:06:11,121 --> 00:06:12,664
Lucy doesn't know
135
00:06:12,789 --> 00:06:14,666
the meaning
of the word "no."
136
00:06:14,791 --> 00:06:16,209
Ethel doesn't either.
137
00:06:16,334 --> 00:06:18,670
Lucy is a sucker
for any sales pitch.
138
00:06:18,795 --> 00:06:20,171
Ethel is too.
139
00:06:20,297 --> 00:06:22,591
Lucy and Ethel
make me sick.
140
00:06:22,716 --> 00:06:25,343
Now, honey, you,
you must admit
141
00:06:25,468 --> 00:06:29,097
that you'll buy anything
that comes along.
142
00:06:29,222 --> 00:06:30,348
I'm no worse
than you are.
143
00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:32,225
How about that little
purchase you made
144
00:06:32,350 --> 00:06:33,517
at the war surplus store?
145
00:06:33,642 --> 00:06:35,312
That was a necessary item.
146
00:06:35,437 --> 00:06:37,230
Oh, sure. You never know
147
00:06:37,355 --> 00:06:40,817
when you're going to use
a 20-foot rubber life raft.
148
00:06:40,942 --> 00:06:43,737
What are you
laughing at, fatso?
149
00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:45,404
You're just as bad.
150
00:06:45,529 --> 00:06:47,449
What are you
talking about?
151
00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:48,700
Now, look, look, look.
152
00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:51,786
The fact is that you've
just thrown eight dollars
153
00:06:51,912 --> 00:06:53,538
down the drain for... this.
154
00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:55,040
$7.95, and it isn't
down the drain.
155
00:06:55,165 --> 00:06:56,583
I got it on a
three-day free trial.
156
00:06:56,708 --> 00:06:58,293
If I don't want it,
I just call them up
157
00:06:58,418 --> 00:06:59,628
and tell them
to take it back.
158
00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:01,296
Well, then call them up.
159
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:02,547
No.
160
00:07:02,672 --> 00:07:05,550
Lucy, either you're going
to call them up
161
00:07:05,675 --> 00:07:08,553
and tell them to take it back,
162
00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:11,014
or I'm going to use it
to demonstrate how to cut a wife
163
00:07:11,139 --> 00:07:13,683
into 16 identical slices.
164
00:07:15,518 --> 00:07:17,187
Really?
165
00:07:56,893 --> 00:07:58,144
Mrs. Ricardo?
166
00:07:58,269 --> 00:07:59,479
Yes?
167
00:07:59,604 --> 00:08:01,564
I'm Harry Martin of the
Handy Dandy Company.
168
00:08:01,690 --> 00:08:03,108
Oh, yes,
I've been expecting you.
169
00:08:03,233 --> 00:08:04,484
Won't you come in,
please?
170
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:09,990
Mr. Martin, this Handy Dandy
kitchen helper does not work
171
00:08:10,115 --> 00:08:13,868
and I have it on a three-day
free trial and I don't want it.
172
00:08:13,994 --> 00:08:15,620
- You'll have to take it back.
- Gladly.
173
00:08:15,745 --> 00:08:17,205
It isn't any good,
and I'm not going to pay for it.
174
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:18,707
Of course you're not.
175
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:20,208
I see no reason why I should...
176
00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:21,835
What'd you say?
177
00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:24,170
I said of course you're not
going to pay for it.
178
00:08:24,295 --> 00:08:26,172
We don't want you to
keep any merchandise
179
00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:27,424
that you're
not happy with.
180
00:08:27,549 --> 00:08:28,425
You don't?
181
00:08:28,550 --> 00:08:29,926
No, of course not,
182
00:08:30,051 --> 00:08:32,429
and you're quite right
not to want that.
183
00:08:32,554 --> 00:08:34,139
Why, that isn't
a wise buy at all.
184
00:08:34,264 --> 00:08:35,432
In fact, Mrs. Ricardo,
185
00:08:35,557 --> 00:08:38,018
I wouldn't let you keep
this dreadful little gadget
186
00:08:38,143 --> 00:08:40,102
even if you begged me to.
187
00:08:42,689 --> 00:08:44,941
I'm glad you
didn't want that.
188
00:08:45,066 --> 00:08:48,820
That shows me that you're
a woman of judgement and taste.
189
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:50,905
- Really?
- Yes, indeed.
190
00:08:51,030 --> 00:08:53,658
When you opened that door,
I said to myself, I said,
191
00:08:53,783 --> 00:08:56,785
"Harry, there stands a woman
of judgement and taste."
192
00:08:58,038 --> 00:08:59,372
Is that so?
193
00:08:59,497 --> 00:09:00,498
Mm-hmm.
194
00:09:00,623 --> 00:09:02,292
Mrs. Ricardo,
you have no idea
195
00:09:02,417 --> 00:09:04,169
of the inferior
type of humanity
196
00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:06,880
that I have to contend
with in my profession.
197
00:09:07,005 --> 00:09:08,423
Why, you just
wouldn't believe
198
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:10,592
some of the women that
I have to talk to.
199
00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:13,136
They... they have
no intelligence at all.
200
00:09:13,261 --> 00:09:15,054
My goodness.
201
00:09:15,179 --> 00:09:16,056
Mm-hmm.
202
00:09:16,181 --> 00:09:18,266
Why, just this
morning, I ran in...
203
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:20,184
Say, I'll bet
I'm keeping you
204
00:09:20,309 --> 00:09:21,852
from something
important.
205
00:09:21,977 --> 00:09:23,563
Oh, no, no. Not at all.
206
00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:26,357
Well, I find you're such
an easy person to talk to
207
00:09:26,482 --> 00:09:29,360
and, I don't know, I'd just
like to get this off my chest.
208
00:09:29,486 --> 00:09:31,071
Oh, well,
go right ahead.
209
00:09:31,196 --> 00:09:33,073
May I tell you about what
happened to me this morning?
210
00:09:33,198 --> 00:09:34,699
- Certainly.
- Thank you, thank you.
211
00:09:34,824 --> 00:09:36,367
Now, you just pretend
212
00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:38,578
that you're this woman
I'm calling on, eh?
213
00:09:38,703 --> 00:09:39,578
All right.
214
00:09:39,703 --> 00:09:41,247
Just stay right there.
215
00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:52,717
What's that?
216
00:09:52,842 --> 00:09:54,052
I also represent
217
00:09:54,177 --> 00:09:56,054
the Handy Dandy
vacuum cleaner.
218
00:09:56,179 --> 00:09:57,679
Oh.
219
00:10:00,517 --> 00:10:02,559
So this morning,
when the woman opened the door
220
00:10:02,684 --> 00:10:03,852
and I threw the dirt
on the floor,
221
00:10:03,977 --> 00:10:05,271
just like I did now
222
00:10:05,396 --> 00:10:08,942
and then I handed her
a ten-dollar bill,
223
00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,652
just like this, you see,
224
00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:12,403
and then I said to her,
225
00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:15,240
I said, "Madam,
that ten-dollar bill,
226
00:10:15,365 --> 00:10:18,493
"that sawbuck,
that one-tenth of a C-note
227
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:21,746
"is all yours if this
Handy Dandy vacuum cleaner
228
00:10:21,871 --> 00:10:23,998
"fails to clean up
all this dirt
229
00:10:24,124 --> 00:10:26,208
in less than
two minutes flat."
230
00:10:26,333 --> 00:10:27,627
I said that to her, see?
231
00:10:27,752 --> 00:10:29,379
And then I, uh...
I took
232
00:10:29,504 --> 00:10:32,423
my Handy Dandy
vacuum cleaner
233
00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:35,051
and I... I plugged it in...
like this,
234
00:10:35,176 --> 00:10:37,554
and then I...
went right to work.
235
00:10:41,057 --> 00:10:42,600
That's funny.
236
00:10:42,725 --> 00:10:45,520
Oh, this plug
is controlled by this switch.
237
00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:46,980
So's that light, see?
238
00:10:47,105 --> 00:10:48,273
Oh, I see.
239
00:10:51,109 --> 00:10:52,610
Go.
240
00:11:08,042 --> 00:11:09,252
45 seconds.
241
00:11:09,377 --> 00:11:11,838
My!
242
00:11:11,963 --> 00:11:13,047
That was fast.
243
00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,133
Yes, it was, wasn't it?
244
00:11:15,258 --> 00:11:18,595
But do you know
that woman was angry with me?
245
00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:19,761
About what?
246
00:11:19,888 --> 00:11:21,472
Because I threw dirt
on her floor.
247
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:22,932
But you cleaned
it right up
248
00:11:23,057 --> 00:11:25,184
with your wonderful Handy
Dandy vacuum cleaner.
249
00:11:25,309 --> 00:11:28,438
Yes, yes, of course I did,
but she was still angry
250
00:11:28,563 --> 00:11:31,232
and do you know
what she did next?
251
00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:32,734
What?
252
00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:34,319
Why, when I told her
253
00:11:34,444 --> 00:11:36,946
that this Handy Dandy
vacuum cleaner
254
00:11:37,071 --> 00:11:38,615
and the attachments
255
00:11:38,740 --> 00:11:41,367
that it sold
for $8.95 for the works,
256
00:11:41,492 --> 00:11:44,787
why, that shortsighted,
narrow-vision female
257
00:11:44,913 --> 00:11:48,666
did not even have
the intelligence to buy one.
258
00:11:48,791 --> 00:11:51,294
What a dope.
259
00:11:53,421 --> 00:11:54,797
Well, it shows you
260
00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:57,217
what you've got
to put up with.
261
00:11:57,342 --> 00:12:00,678
I'm glad you let me
get that off my chest.
262
00:12:04,807 --> 00:12:10,188
Mr. Martin...
did you say, uh, 8.95?
263
00:12:10,313 --> 00:12:11,689
That's right.
264
00:12:11,814 --> 00:12:14,567
And, uh, now I think
I'll have to go...
265
00:12:14,692 --> 00:12:16,861
Mr. Martin, aren't
you going to give me
266
00:12:16,986 --> 00:12:18,571
a chance to buy
one of those?
267
00:12:18,696 --> 00:12:20,073
Oh, Mrs. Ricardo,
268
00:12:20,198 --> 00:12:22,492
when I told you
about this other woman,
269
00:12:22,617 --> 00:12:24,702
I didn't mean
to get you to buy...
270
00:12:24,827 --> 00:12:27,622
Oh, but Mr. Martin, our
sweeper is so outdated.
271
00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:29,791
It's old, it doesn't
work right or anything
272
00:12:29,916 --> 00:12:31,708
and we really do
need one of those.
273
00:12:31,833 --> 00:12:34,879
Well, as a matter
of fact, I...
274
00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:36,798
I was bringing
this little gem home
275
00:12:36,923 --> 00:12:38,591
as a present
for my wife, but...
276
00:12:38,716 --> 00:12:40,385
Oh...
277
00:12:40,510 --> 00:12:42,220
Well, I don't know.
278
00:12:42,345 --> 00:12:44,054
I suppose if you
really need one.
279
00:12:44,179 --> 00:12:46,557
Oh, we do, we do.
280
00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:50,061
You talked me into it.
281
00:12:50,186 --> 00:12:51,896
Oh, thank you,
Mr. Martin.
282
00:12:52,021 --> 00:12:53,523
Thank you.
283
00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:58,778
Uh... five,
284
00:12:58,903 --> 00:13:00,446
six,
285
00:13:00,571 --> 00:13:02,407
seven,
286
00:13:02,532 --> 00:13:03,908
eight...
287
00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:05,576
Mm-hmm.
288
00:13:05,702 --> 00:13:07,745
Let's see... 95.
Is that right?
289
00:13:07,870 --> 00:13:09,247
That's the price...
290
00:13:09,372 --> 00:13:12,917
for the works.
291
00:13:13,042 --> 00:13:14,961
Now that you
own the works
292
00:13:15,086 --> 00:13:17,297
don't you think
that you would like
293
00:13:17,422 --> 00:13:19,381
this nice gray
metal cover
294
00:13:19,506 --> 00:13:23,386
to keep it
from getting dirty?
295
00:13:23,511 --> 00:13:25,429
But didn't I
just buy the...?
296
00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:27,932
You bought
the most important part--
297
00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:30,059
Yeah, the... the works.
298
00:13:32,186 --> 00:13:33,271
Now, there are
299
00:13:33,396 --> 00:13:35,231
a few more
little accessories,
300
00:13:35,356 --> 00:13:38,109
like, like the hose,
and the electric cord
301
00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:39,944
and the attachments there.
302
00:13:40,069 --> 00:13:41,779
Gee, that must run into
quite a bit of money.
303
00:13:41,904 --> 00:13:43,072
No, no, no, not at all.
304
00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:45,241
This, this electric cord,
for instance,
305
00:13:45,366 --> 00:13:46,743
is only five dollars.
306
00:13:46,868 --> 00:13:48,285
Five dollars?!
307
00:13:48,410 --> 00:13:50,121
Well, it's extra long.
308
00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:51,622
Oh.
309
00:13:51,748 --> 00:13:51,914
And, uh...
the attachments, uh...
310
00:13:51,914 --> 00:13:54,125
And, uh...
the attachments, uh...
311
00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:55,626
are $2.50.
312
00:13:55,752 --> 00:13:57,128
$2.50?
313
00:13:57,253 --> 00:13:58,629
- Apiece.
- Oh.
314
00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:01,799
- And then there's
a utility lamp... -Oh?
315
00:14:01,924 --> 00:14:04,677
- There's a carrying case
for the cleaner... -Oh?
316
00:14:04,802 --> 00:14:06,429
- Carrying case
for the attachments... -Oh?
317
00:14:06,554 --> 00:14:08,431
There's a switch that
turns it on and off...
318
00:14:24,572 --> 00:14:25,907
Hi, Lucy.
319
00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:28,701
Did the man take back
the kitchen helper?
320
00:14:28,826 --> 00:14:31,037
Did you have any
trouble with him?
321
00:14:31,162 --> 00:14:32,997
What's the
matter with...?
322
00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:36,209
Lucy, did you buy all
this stuff from him?
323
00:14:38,252 --> 00:14:39,754
Oh, Lucy,
I thought you
324
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:43,049
were going to have
sales resistance from now on.
325
00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:47,261
What happened?
326
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:48,513
I don't know.
327
00:14:48,638 --> 00:14:50,807
Right after he took back
the kitchen helper,
328
00:14:50,932 --> 00:14:53,267
everything went black.
329
00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:54,268
Oh?
330
00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:56,104
When the lights
came on again,
331
00:14:56,229 --> 00:14:59,607
I was short $102.40.
332
00:14:59,732 --> 00:15:02,443
$102.40 for just this?
333
00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:06,906
No. For a bonus, he threw in
the kitchen helper.
334
00:15:07,031 --> 00:15:09,200
That was nice of him.
335
00:15:09,325 --> 00:15:11,160
For a dollar and a half.
336
00:15:11,285 --> 00:15:12,912
What a salesman
he must be!
337
00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:15,790
Yeah, but this is
really a wonderful machine
338
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:17,792
and it just
works beautifully.
339
00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:20,211
Turn on the switch
and I'll show you.
340
00:15:20,336 --> 00:15:22,004
Okay.
341
00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:32,056
What's this one for, Lucy?
342
00:15:32,181 --> 00:15:33,433
Lucy?
343
00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:39,772
Try this one, Lucy.
344
00:15:39,897 --> 00:15:41,899
[Ricky] ♪ Ay, yi, yi, yi... ♪
345
00:15:42,024 --> 00:15:42,984
That's Ricky! That's Ricky!
346
00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:44,360
I don't want him
to see this stuff.
347
00:15:44,485 --> 00:15:45,361
Help me hide it.
348
00:15:45,486 --> 00:15:46,571
- Hide it?
- Yeah.
349
00:15:46,696 --> 00:15:47,905
- Oh.
- He can't see this.
350
00:15:48,030 --> 00:15:50,741
Aren't you going to tell
him you bought all this?
351
00:15:50,867 --> 00:15:53,786
Someday, yes, when we're
old and gray, but not now.
352
00:15:53,911 --> 00:15:55,204
Where will I put it?
353
00:15:55,329 --> 00:15:56,205
In the closet.
354
00:15:56,330 --> 00:15:57,248
In the closet?
355
00:15:57,373 --> 00:16:00,543
♪ Ay, yi, yi, yi ♪
356
00:16:00,668 --> 00:16:04,714
♪ Canta y no llores ♪
357
00:16:04,839 --> 00:16:09,343
♪ Porque cantando se alegran,
cielito lin... ♪
358
00:16:09,469 --> 00:16:10,386
Hello.
359
00:16:10,511 --> 00:16:11,804
Oh, look. Here's Ricky.
360
00:16:11,929 --> 00:16:12,805
Hi, Ricky.
361
00:16:12,930 --> 00:16:13,806
Hello, Ricky.
362
00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:16,017
Good-bye, Ricky.
363
00:16:18,394 --> 00:16:19,812
Well, she's in a hurry.
364
00:16:19,937 --> 00:16:20,897
Yeah.
365
00:16:21,022 --> 00:16:22,565
Oh, I'll hang it up
for you, dear.
366
00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:24,066
Oh, thank you.
367
00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:33,534
What did you do today?
368
00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:35,161
Why do you ask that?
369
00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:40,249
I always ask that.
370
00:16:40,374 --> 00:16:41,584
Oh, yeah.
371
00:16:41,709 --> 00:16:42,919
That's right.
372
00:16:43,044 --> 00:16:45,838
Uh, nothing much.
373
00:16:47,131 --> 00:16:48,966
It's dark in here.
374
00:16:50,468 --> 00:16:52,053
Oh...
375
00:17:03,731 --> 00:17:05,191
What's that?
376
00:17:05,316 --> 00:17:06,067
What's what?
377
00:17:06,192 --> 00:17:07,401
That.
378
00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:08,569
What?
379
00:17:08,694 --> 00:17:09,695
That.
380
00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:11,364
Oh, that. That's me.
381
00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:16,244
What?!
382
00:17:16,369 --> 00:17:17,619
My stomach's growling.
383
00:17:17,744 --> 00:17:19,830
It's been growling all day.
384
00:17:24,585 --> 00:17:26,087
Now, Lucy, you
know darn well
385
00:17:26,212 --> 00:17:27,672
you're not making
that noise.
386
00:17:27,797 --> 00:17:28,839
It sounds like
a vacuum cleaner.
387
00:17:28,965 --> 00:17:29,840
Where's it coming from?
388
00:17:29,965 --> 00:17:30,840
Oh, that sound.
389
00:17:30,967 --> 00:17:32,552
Oh, Ethel must be
cleaning her rugs.
390
00:17:32,677 --> 00:17:34,554
All right, Ethel,
break it up down there!
391
00:17:34,679 --> 00:17:35,555
That's all.
392
00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:37,932
There. I guess
she's finished.
393
00:17:39,475 --> 00:17:41,894
Whoops. Not quite.
394
00:17:46,941 --> 00:17:48,150
Ricky?
395
00:17:48,276 --> 00:17:49,193
What?
396
00:17:49,318 --> 00:17:50,528
Kiss me?
397
00:17:50,653 --> 00:17:53,239
After I see what's
at the end of this cord.
398
00:17:53,364 --> 00:17:54,740
All right?
399
00:17:54,865 --> 00:17:58,744
You'd better kiss me now
if you're ever going to.
400
00:18:13,217 --> 00:18:15,011
Lucy, what is this?
401
00:18:15,136 --> 00:18:18,472
Oh, darn. You found
your Christmas present.
402
00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:27,481
"The Handy Dandy
vacuum cle... "
403
00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:31,027
Oh, no. Lucy, you didn't!
404
00:18:31,152 --> 00:18:33,613
Yeah, I sort of did, I guess.
405
00:18:33,738 --> 00:18:35,823
Okay, come on.
406
00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:37,825
Call the man.
Tell him to take it back.
407
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:38,826
No.
408
00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:39,827
Come on.
409
00:18:39,952 --> 00:18:40,994
- You'll be sorry.
- Why?
410
00:18:41,119 --> 00:18:42,747
'Cause he'll
probably sell me
411
00:18:42,872 --> 00:18:43,873
a Handy Dandy bulldozer.
412
00:18:43,998 --> 00:18:45,541
Never mind.
413
00:18:45,666 --> 00:18:48,210
But Ricky, Ricky, really,
he does sell other things,
414
00:18:48,336 --> 00:18:49,503
and you know how I am.
415
00:18:50,588 --> 00:18:53,674
Yes. I know only too well.
416
00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:55,468
Now, look, you're going
to call him back
417
00:18:55,593 --> 00:18:57,678
and you're going to get rid
of that vacuum cleaner
418
00:18:57,803 --> 00:19:00,056
and you're going to get
your money back, understand?
419
00:19:00,181 --> 00:19:01,515
-
- Oh, yes.
420
00:19:06,103 --> 00:19:07,813
Lucy?
421
00:19:12,568 --> 00:19:15,071
I'm taking it back
this afternoon!
422
00:19:17,031 --> 00:19:18,324
Oh...
423
00:19:20,409 --> 00:19:22,411
I thought you were Ricky.
424
00:19:22,536 --> 00:19:25,414
Oh. Are you really going
to take it back?
425
00:19:25,539 --> 00:19:29,210
Yeah. I was just having
one last sweep for the road.
426
00:19:29,335 --> 00:19:31,879
Oh, gee, Ethel, I don't dare
call Mr. Martin.
427
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,964
I'm absolute putty
in his hands.
428
00:19:34,090 --> 00:19:35,174
Obviously.
429
00:19:35,299 --> 00:19:37,218
Why did I buy
that thing anyway?
430
00:19:37,343 --> 00:19:38,219
Why did you?
431
00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:39,929
I couldn't resist it.
432
00:19:40,054 --> 00:19:42,306
Hey... if I couldn't resist it
433
00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:45,184
maybe someone else
won't be able to.
434
00:19:45,309 --> 00:19:47,936
You mean you're going try
to sell it to somebody else?
435
00:19:48,061 --> 00:19:49,647
Sure, I could sell it.
436
00:19:49,772 --> 00:19:52,650
I remember everything
Mr. Martin said and did.
437
00:19:52,775 --> 00:19:54,276
Don't look at me.
438
00:19:54,402 --> 00:19:56,320
Oh, I'm going to start
on the next block
439
00:19:56,445 --> 00:19:59,365
and I'm going to keep going
until I unload this monster.
440
00:20:08,791 --> 00:20:10,000
Good afternoon, madam.
441
00:20:10,126 --> 00:20:12,253
Are you the lady of the house?
442
00:20:12,378 --> 00:20:13,587
Yeah.
443
00:20:15,631 --> 00:20:17,590
Hey! What are you doing?
444
00:20:17,717 --> 00:20:20,136
Madam, that ten-dollar bill,
that sawbuck,
445
00:20:20,261 --> 00:20:22,763
that one-tenth of a C-note
is all yours
446
00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:24,974
if my Handy Dandy
vacuum cleaner
447
00:20:25,099 --> 00:20:28,561
fails to clean up that mess
in two minutes flat.
448
00:20:31,856 --> 00:20:36,026
You mean this ten dollars
is mine if you don't pick up
449
00:20:36,152 --> 00:20:38,904
all that dirt
in two minutes flat?
450
00:20:39,029 --> 00:20:40,239
That's right.
451
00:20:40,364 --> 00:20:41,615
Let's see, now.
452
00:20:41,741 --> 00:20:43,743
Here we are.
453
00:20:52,001 --> 00:20:53,210
That's funny.
454
00:20:53,335 --> 00:20:55,546
I can't imagine
why it doesn't work.
455
00:20:55,671 --> 00:20:58,465
I can. The electricity
is turned off.
456
00:20:58,590 --> 00:20:59,842
What?
457
00:20:59,967 --> 00:21:01,635
We didn't pay our bill.
458
00:21:01,761 --> 00:21:02,970
Oh, no.
459
00:21:03,095 --> 00:21:05,598
Why didn't you tell me?
460
00:21:05,723 --> 00:21:08,225
You didn't ask me.
461
00:21:11,103 --> 00:21:12,480
Oh, dear.
462
00:21:12,605 --> 00:21:14,482
I'm sorry I made such
a mess on your floor.
463
00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:16,567
I don't know how you're
going to clean it up.
464
00:21:16,692 --> 00:21:18,861
I do.
465
00:21:18,986 --> 00:21:21,155
Ew...
466
00:21:33,584 --> 00:21:34,877
Where can she be, Ethel?
467
00:21:35,002 --> 00:21:36,003
It's so late.
468
00:21:36,128 --> 00:21:37,463
I don't know.
Maybe she had to call
469
00:21:37,588 --> 00:21:39,173
on more houses
than she thought she would.
470
00:21:39,298 --> 00:21:40,758
Well, there's nothing
to worry about.
471
00:21:40,883 --> 00:21:42,301
- She's prob...
- Shh! I hear somebody.
472
00:21:46,888 --> 00:21:48,307
Lucy!
473
00:21:48,432 --> 00:21:51,060
What happened?
474
00:21:54,814 --> 00:21:56,732
You'll be glad
to know, Ricky,
475
00:21:56,857 --> 00:21:59,401
that there are plenty
of women in town
476
00:21:59,527 --> 00:22:01,028
with sales resistance.
477
00:22:01,153 --> 00:22:02,696
Couldn't you sell
the vacuum cleaner?
478
00:22:04,532 --> 00:22:05,782
Oh, you poor little thing.
479
00:22:05,907 --> 00:22:07,618
Come on, honey,
and sit down.
480
00:22:07,743 --> 00:22:08,702
Here. Sit there.
481
00:22:08,828 --> 00:22:10,454
I'll take your shoes off.
482
00:22:10,579 --> 00:22:11,539
That will help.
483
00:22:11,664 --> 00:22:13,541
Lucy, where's
your other shoe?
484
00:22:13,666 --> 00:22:16,752
Stuck in the door
at 310 East 69th Street.
485
00:22:17,837 --> 00:22:20,506
Oh, dear.
486
00:22:20,631 --> 00:22:23,217
I was kicked downstairs,
bitten by a dog
487
00:22:23,342 --> 00:22:24,885
and chased three blocks
by a policeman
488
00:22:25,010 --> 00:22:26,846
that wanted to see
my peddler's license.
489
00:22:28,305 --> 00:22:30,641
One more hour,
they'd have reported
490
00:22:30,766 --> 00:22:32,643
the death of another salesman.
491
00:22:32,768 --> 00:22:33,769
Now, honey, I'm sorry
492
00:22:33,894 --> 00:22:36,146
that you had to go through
all of that
493
00:22:36,272 --> 00:22:37,982
but you know
it's your own fault.
494
00:22:38,107 --> 00:22:41,068
Why didn't you call Mr. Martin
like I told you to do?
495
00:22:41,193 --> 00:22:42,403
Oh, sure.
496
00:22:42,528 --> 00:22:44,071
Well, I'll call him.
497
00:22:44,196 --> 00:22:45,071
What's his number?
498
00:22:45,196 --> 00:22:46,407
It's right there
on the pad.
499
00:22:46,532 --> 00:22:47,782
Okay.
500
00:22:47,907 --> 00:22:50,244
Oh, Fred, I don't know
what these women would do
501
00:22:50,369 --> 00:22:51,829
without us men
getting them out
502
00:22:51,954 --> 00:22:53,830
of all these messes
that they get into.
503
00:22:53,955 --> 00:22:55,916
I don't either.
504
00:22:56,041 --> 00:22:57,960
Hello, Mr. Martin.
505
00:22:58,085 --> 00:22:59,461
This is Ricky Ricardo.
506
00:22:59,587 --> 00:23:02,840
Look. You sold my wife
a vacuum cleaner yesterday.
507
00:23:02,965 --> 00:23:04,090
Yes. That's right.
508
00:23:04,215 --> 00:23:07,177
Well, uh, we decided
not to keep it after all.
509
00:23:07,303 --> 00:23:09,680
So we'd like you
to come back tonight
510
00:23:09,805 --> 00:23:10,848
and take it back.
511
00:23:10,973 --> 00:23:13,767
8:00? Yes,
that will be fine.
512
00:23:13,893 --> 00:23:15,769
Thank you very much.
Good-bye.
513
00:23:15,895 --> 00:23:17,271
There. You see
how simple it was?
514
00:23:17,396 --> 00:23:19,398
Ricky, you shouldn't
have him come over here.
515
00:23:19,523 --> 00:23:20,816
You don't know what he's like.
516
00:23:20,941 --> 00:23:22,401
He'll say
that he'll take it back,
517
00:23:22,526 --> 00:23:23,986
but he'll sell you
something else.
518
00:23:24,111 --> 00:23:25,779
Oh, nonsense.
519
00:23:25,905 --> 00:23:27,907
Well, I'm not going to be here.
I'm going to a movie.
520
00:23:28,032 --> 00:23:29,617
Come on, Ethel,
let's get out of here.
521
00:23:29,742 --> 00:23:31,118
- Okay.
- I'm going to get cleaned up.
522
00:23:31,243 --> 00:23:33,787
Have you ever seen
anything like that?
523
00:23:33,913 --> 00:23:35,497
Never in my life.
524
00:23:35,623 --> 00:23:36,540
You take my advice.
525
00:23:36,665 --> 00:23:38,584
You put that vacuum cleaner
out in the hall,
526
00:23:38,709 --> 00:23:40,544
lock the door
and sit here in the dark.
527
00:23:48,969 --> 00:23:50,429
Hi.
528
00:23:50,554 --> 00:23:51,805
Oh, hi. How
was the movie?
529
00:23:51,931 --> 00:23:53,474
Fine.
530
00:23:53,599 --> 00:23:55,726
Did, uh... Mr.
Martin get here?
531
00:23:55,851 --> 00:23:57,227
Yeah. He was here.
532
00:23:57,353 --> 00:23:58,938
Did he take back
the vacuum cleaner?
533
00:23:59,063 --> 00:24:00,022
Of course he did.
534
00:24:00,147 --> 00:24:01,898
He had no trouble at all.
535
00:24:02,023 --> 00:24:03,484
Oh?
536
00:24:03,609 --> 00:24:06,445
As a matter of fact,
he paid me a great compliment.
537
00:24:06,570 --> 00:24:09,490
He said I was a man of great
judgment and real taste.
538
00:24:09,615 --> 00:24:11,532
Oh.
539
00:24:11,659 --> 00:24:15,412
And not only that, but he said
he didn't blame me in the least
540
00:24:15,537 --> 00:24:18,123
for not buying
such an inferior product.
541
00:24:18,248 --> 00:24:19,583
Uh-oh.
542
00:24:19,708 --> 00:24:21,292
What happened then?
543
00:24:21,417 --> 00:24:22,711
Nothing.
544
00:24:22,836 --> 00:24:23,879
Come on.
545
00:24:24,004 --> 00:24:25,089
Nothing.
546
00:24:25,214 --> 00:24:27,215
Come on.
Where is it?
547
00:24:37,101 --> 00:24:38,394
Ethel, guess what?
548
00:24:38,519 --> 00:24:41,438
We have
a new Handy Dandy refrigerator.
549
00:24:41,563 --> 00:24:43,190
Oh, Ricky, I'm glad
550
00:24:43,315 --> 00:24:47,528
you don't have
any sales resistance either.
551
00:24:47,653 --> 00:24:50,114
[Ethel] Aw, Lucy.
552
00:24:50,239 --> 00:24:51,573
You get all the breaks.
553
00:24:51,699 --> 00:24:53,826
Nobody could sell
ol' Fred anything.
554
00:24:53,951 --> 00:24:55,536
Oh, no?
555
00:24:55,661 --> 00:24:56,954
Oh?
556
00:24:57,079 --> 00:24:59,205
Fred?
557
00:25:00,249 --> 00:25:01,375
Come on down and see
558
00:25:01,500 --> 00:25:03,627
your Handy Dandy
washing machine.
38171
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof