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1
00:00:29,404 --> 00:00:31,281
Well, how do I look?
2
00:00:33,408 --> 00:00:35,284
Gee, that's a beautiful dress.
3
00:00:35,409 --> 00:00:36,620
- Is it new?
- Uh-huh.
4
00:00:36,745 --> 00:00:38,956
I thought I'd get
all gussied up tonight.
5
00:00:39,081 --> 00:00:40,915
You know, it isn't every day
that Mr. and Mrs. Fred Mertz
6
00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:43,210
celebrate their
25th wedding anniversary.
7
00:00:43,335 --> 00:00:45,462
That's right.
8
00:00:45,587 --> 00:00:47,798
Gee, that's such a long time.
9
00:00:47,923 --> 00:00:49,466
25 Years.
10
00:00:49,591 --> 00:00:51,468
Yeah.
11
00:00:51,593 --> 00:00:53,595
25 years?
12
00:00:53,595 --> 00:00:54,137
25 years?
13
00:00:54,263 --> 00:00:57,432
Sounds longer when you say it.
14
00:00:59,851 --> 00:01:01,478
Oh, honey, I meant,
15
00:01:01,603 --> 00:01:04,731
you know, being married
to Ethel for 25 years.
16
00:01:04,856 --> 00:01:06,733
It's different with you.
17
00:01:06,858 --> 00:01:09,069
Yeah, don't try
to get out of it.
18
00:01:09,194 --> 00:01:11,154
You know, I'd like
to see their faces
19
00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:12,739
when they open the present.
20
00:01:12,864 --> 00:01:14,408
You will.
They haven't seen it yet.
21
00:01:14,533 --> 00:01:16,410
I had it delivered up here.
22
00:01:16,535 --> 00:01:17,828
What?
23
00:01:17,953 --> 00:01:19,413
Yeah, I got it in the closet.
24
00:01:19,538 --> 00:01:20,497
- In the closet?
- Sure.
25
00:01:20,622 --> 00:01:21,999
How we going to get it
get it downstairs?
26
00:01:22,124 --> 00:01:23,000
Oh, don't be silly.
27
00:01:23,125 --> 00:01:24,418
It won't be
any trouble at all.
28
00:01:24,543 --> 00:01:26,253
We're going to carry it.
29
00:01:26,378 --> 00:01:27,421
Oh!
30
00:01:29,715 --> 00:01:31,008
What are you doing?
31
00:01:31,133 --> 00:01:33,302
It's so awkward.
32
00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:34,803
I know it's awkward.
33
00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:36,305
Take it easy now.
34
00:01:36,430 --> 00:01:38,056
Oh, Ricky!
35
00:01:38,181 --> 00:01:39,808
It's slipping!
36
00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:42,477
Now, what did you do that for?
37
00:01:42,603 --> 00:01:45,022
I couldn't help it, honey.
It's so heavy.
38
00:01:45,147 --> 00:01:47,858
Why did you have this
delivered upstairs, anyway?
39
00:01:47,983 --> 00:01:49,735
Now, please, please,
don't lose your temper.
40
00:01:49,860 --> 00:01:51,111
We're doing it for the Mertzes.
41
00:01:51,236 --> 00:01:53,780
I know we're doing it
for the Mertzes.
42
00:01:53,905 --> 00:01:55,032
All right, let's go.
43
00:01:56,241 --> 00:01:57,784
What's the matter?
44
00:01:57,909 --> 00:01:58,785
- Oh, Ricky!
- Yeah?
45
00:01:58,910 --> 00:02:00,454
Honey, all the weight's
on this end.
46
00:02:00,579 --> 00:02:02,122
It is not.
47
00:02:02,247 --> 00:02:04,041
It is too.
48
00:02:04,166 --> 00:02:06,710
I want to trade places
with you.
49
00:02:06,835 --> 00:02:08,712
Okay, put it down.
50
00:02:08,837 --> 00:02:10,047
Come on.
51
00:02:10,172 --> 00:02:13,050
I'll hold it
until you get down here.
52
00:02:13,175 --> 00:02:15,052
Can you make it there?
53
00:02:15,177 --> 00:02:16,720
Yeah.
54
00:02:16,845 --> 00:02:18,555
All right, now, watch it.
55
00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:20,514
Now, hold it here
while I go up there.
56
00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:21,725
- Yeah, I will.
- All right.
57
00:02:21,850 --> 00:02:22,768
Wait a minute.
58
00:02:22,893 --> 00:02:23,769
- Okay.
- Okay.
59
00:02:31,443 --> 00:02:32,986
- Be quiet.
- Okay, let's go.
60
00:02:33,111 --> 00:02:34,655
Remember,
it's for the Mertzes.
61
00:02:34,780 --> 00:02:37,074
I know it's for the Mertzes.
62
00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:39,701
- Are you ready?
- Yeah.
63
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,036
- Oh, Ricky!
- What? What now?
64
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:43,163
All the weight's on this end.
65
00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:45,832
Well, it can't be on both ends.
66
00:02:45,957 --> 00:02:47,376
Well, it is.
67
00:02:47,501 --> 00:02:50,002
I liked it better up there.
68
00:02:50,127 --> 00:02:51,338
Okay.
69
00:02:51,463 --> 00:02:52,673
Let's trade again.
70
00:02:52,798 --> 00:02:53,757
Okay.
71
00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:56,468
Let me get down there first.
72
00:02:58,053 --> 00:02:59,137
All right, go ahead.
73
00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:01,764
Honey, be careful of the bow.
74
00:03:01,889 --> 00:03:03,850
Be careful with the bow?
75
00:03:06,853 --> 00:03:09,398
Gee, this is a pretty set,
isn't it?
76
00:03:09,523 --> 00:03:11,566
Yeah, lovely, lovely set.
77
00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:14,236
All right?
78
00:03:14,361 --> 00:03:15,237
Yeah.
79
00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:16,238
All right, hold it now.
80
00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:17,239
- Okay.
- Okay.
81
00:03:17,364 --> 00:03:18,907
Take it easy.
82
00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:19,907
Yeah, I'm taking it easy.
83
00:03:20,032 --> 00:03:20,909
- All right.
- Okay.
84
00:03:21,034 --> 00:03:23,620
Oh, honey, don't go so fast!
85
00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:25,622
Why did you go so fast?
86
00:03:25,747 --> 00:03:28,750
Look, I like to go
through the door,
87
00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:31,002
not through the wall, eh?
88
00:03:31,127 --> 00:03:32,629
Let's turn it around here,
will you?
89
00:03:32,754 --> 00:03:33,964
What?
90
00:03:34,089 --> 00:03:35,465
Turn it around.
Go around that way.
91
00:03:35,590 --> 00:03:36,967
Be careful.
Be careful of the glass.
92
00:03:37,092 --> 00:03:38,301
I'll be careful
of the glass.
93
00:03:38,427 --> 00:03:39,803
Set it down.
Now, wait a minute.
94
00:03:39,928 --> 00:03:40,971
- Wait a minute.
- I can't...
95
00:03:41,096 --> 00:03:41,972
Set it down there.
96
00:03:42,097 --> 00:03:42,973
- Okay.
- Wait a minute.
97
00:03:43,098 --> 00:03:44,641
Wait a minute.
I think I got an idea.
98
00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:45,642
Wait a minute.
99
00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:47,561
Where do you think I'm going?
100
00:03:47,686 --> 00:03:49,646
All right,
push it up a little bit now.
101
00:03:49,771 --> 00:03:50,981
I can't get a hold of it.
102
00:03:51,106 --> 00:03:52,649
See if you can push it up now.
103
00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:53,650
Okay.
104
00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:55,569
Oh, there, now you got it.
105
00:03:55,694 --> 00:03:57,821
Yeah, I got it, all right. Yeah.
106
00:03:59,531 --> 00:04:01,158
Ay!
107
00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:03,535
Ay!
108
00:04:06,496 --> 00:04:07,914
Ay!
109
00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:11,168
Gee, we should have thought
of this before.
110
00:04:11,293 --> 00:04:13,378
I should have stayed in Cuba.
111
00:04:13,503 --> 00:04:16,757
Ay! Ay!
112
00:04:16,882 --> 00:04:18,091
How you coming?
113
00:04:18,216 --> 00:04:19,551
I'm coming fine.
Put it down there.
114
00:04:19,676 --> 00:04:20,552
Okay.
115
00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:22,763
- Be careful now.
- Yeah, all right.
116
00:04:22,888 --> 00:04:24,765
And don't be so noisy.
117
00:04:24,890 --> 00:04:26,099
Be quiet.
118
00:04:26,224 --> 00:04:28,560
Be careful
with the bow, honey.
119
00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:33,565
Be careful.
120
00:04:33,690 --> 00:04:35,065
Yeah, all right.
121
00:04:35,192 --> 00:04:36,735
All right, never mind,
I got it now.
122
00:04:36,860 --> 00:04:39,488
Okay.
123
00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:42,032
Be careful.
124
00:04:53,668 --> 00:04:56,046
Fred, Ethel?
125
00:05:01,343 --> 00:05:03,094
Oh, my gosh.
126
00:05:03,220 --> 00:05:05,222
I guess they aren't home.
127
00:05:06,932 --> 00:05:08,642
Swell.
128
00:05:08,767 --> 00:05:10,769
Well, back we go.
129
00:05:12,687 --> 00:05:14,231
Back we go?
130
00:05:14,356 --> 00:05:16,565
Well, honey, we can't leave
it sitting down here.
131
00:05:16,690 --> 00:05:18,235
We got to take it...
132
00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:20,570
[Ethel] Thank you for
a wonderful evening.
133
00:05:20,695 --> 00:05:22,238
Hide it.
134
00:05:22,363 --> 00:05:23,323
Hide it?
135
00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:25,408
Open your coat.
136
00:05:25,534 --> 00:05:27,077
Oh, wasn't that sweet
of Miss Lewis
137
00:05:27,202 --> 00:05:28,411
to give us this little cake?
138
00:05:28,537 --> 00:05:30,539
- Happy anniversary!
- Happy anniversary!
139
00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:33,083
A television set!
140
00:05:33,208 --> 00:05:35,085
For us?
141
00:05:35,210 --> 00:05:37,003
[Lucy] Yes.
142
00:05:37,128 --> 00:05:39,005
It was worth it.
143
00:05:39,130 --> 00:05:42,551
Let's get it inside
and see how it works.
144
00:05:46,096 --> 00:05:47,973
Well, there you are.
145
00:05:48,098 --> 00:05:50,976
Now, here's to make it
dark or light.
146
00:05:51,101 --> 00:05:52,351
I know.
147
00:05:52,476 --> 00:05:54,354
Over here's
the channel selector.
148
00:05:54,479 --> 00:05:55,939
Where it's marked
"channel selector."
149
00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:57,274
That's right.
150
00:05:57,399 --> 00:05:58,942
Let's see what we get.
151
00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:00,277
How's that?
152
00:06:00,402 --> 00:06:02,904
There's a wavy line
right across the middle.
153
00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:04,906
Wait a minute, I got it.
154
00:06:05,031 --> 00:06:07,242
Honey, that's just
making it worse.
155
00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,702
Yeah, now it's wavy all over.
156
00:06:09,827 --> 00:06:12,122
Let me try it, will you, Rick?
157
00:06:12,247 --> 00:06:13,790
Fred, will you, please?
158
00:06:13,915 --> 00:06:16,251
You don't know anything
about this set.
159
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:19,087
I can make it just
as wavy as you can.
160
00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:21,714
Fred, it will
have to be adjusted.
161
00:06:21,839 --> 00:06:23,466
- Adjusted?
- Yes.
162
00:06:23,592 --> 00:06:26,803
What are you
going to do with it?
163
00:06:26,928 --> 00:06:28,138
I'll fix it.
164
00:06:28,263 --> 00:06:30,765
I brought this, just in case.
165
00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:33,392
I'll fix this thing
right away, boy.
166
00:06:33,517 --> 00:06:35,145
I got to take
167
00:06:35,270 --> 00:06:36,605
the plug first.
168
00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:38,732
Hey, wait, Rick,
look at this.
169
00:06:38,857 --> 00:06:40,734
"Danger, high voltage.
170
00:06:40,859 --> 00:06:43,737
Do not remove this back
under any circumstances."
171
00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:45,738
Oh, that's just for people
172
00:06:45,863 --> 00:06:49,117
that don't know anything
about these sets.
173
00:06:50,660 --> 00:06:53,204
Ah, here's the trouble
right here, you see?
174
00:06:53,330 --> 00:06:55,206
These two wires
probably came loose
175
00:06:55,332 --> 00:06:57,541
when we were bringing
the set downstairs.
176
00:06:57,666 --> 00:06:59,836
Now, you see this red one here
177
00:06:59,961 --> 00:07:01,504
and the blue one?
178
00:07:01,630 --> 00:07:03,005
They're disconnected.
179
00:07:03,130 --> 00:07:05,508
I'll put them together, see?
180
00:07:05,634 --> 00:07:07,844
And... put them together
just like that.
181
00:07:07,969 --> 00:07:09,512
That ought to do it.
182
00:07:09,638 --> 00:07:10,513
Yeah?
183
00:07:10,639 --> 00:07:12,182
Now we'll plug it in,
184
00:07:12,307 --> 00:07:14,851
and we get ourselves
a real picture.
185
00:07:14,976 --> 00:07:16,978
Gee, I hope so.
186
00:07:18,396 --> 00:07:20,482
You wait and see.
187
00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:24,778
[Ethel] Ricky!
188
00:07:26,488 --> 00:07:28,031
Now look what you've done!
189
00:07:28,156 --> 00:07:29,699
You've busted it!
190
00:07:29,824 --> 00:07:31,201
What I've done?
191
00:07:31,326 --> 00:07:34,496
It's the lousy wiring
in this broken-down apartment.
192
00:07:34,621 --> 00:07:35,664
Now just a minute, Ricky.
193
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:37,123
Everything
would have been okay
194
00:07:37,248 --> 00:07:39,209
if you hadn't butted in
and tried to fix it.
195
00:07:39,334 --> 00:07:40,460
[Fred] Yes!
196
00:07:40,585 --> 00:07:42,629
Oh, Ethel, is that any way
to talk to Ricky?
197
00:07:42,754 --> 00:07:44,172
He was only trying to help.
198
00:07:44,297 --> 00:07:46,132
He helped it, all right.
199
00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:48,051
He ruined our TV set.
200
00:07:48,176 --> 00:07:50,178
What do you mean,
your TV set?
201
00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:51,721
We just gave it to you.
202
00:07:51,846 --> 00:07:52,722
[Ricky] Yeah!
203
00:07:52,847 --> 00:07:55,976
Well, a couple
of Indian TV givers.
204
00:07:56,101 --> 00:07:57,644
Oh, yeah?
205
00:07:57,769 --> 00:08:00,438
Yeah! Why didn't you
just give us the set
206
00:08:00,563 --> 00:08:03,400
and keep your
grubby, Cuban paws off of it?
207
00:08:03,525 --> 00:08:05,944
He can put his
grubby, Cuban paws
208
00:08:06,069 --> 00:08:07,529
any place he wants to.
209
00:08:07,654 --> 00:08:08,863
Stay out of this.
210
00:08:08,989 --> 00:08:11,157
Listen, you ungrateful
old goat.
211
00:08:11,282 --> 00:08:12,701
That's the word, ungrateful.
212
00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:15,453
Yeah. This set is
just like ours,
213
00:08:15,578 --> 00:08:17,831
and I fixed ours 100 times.
214
00:08:17,956 --> 00:08:20,000
It is not like yours.
215
00:08:20,125 --> 00:08:21,668
Yours works!
216
00:08:37,809 --> 00:08:39,977
Now it's like ours.
217
00:08:42,564 --> 00:08:44,691
Now, listen, you.
218
00:08:44,816 --> 00:08:48,111
You're going to pay for having
that set fixed, Mr. Mertz.
219
00:08:48,236 --> 00:08:49,779
Oh, yeah?
220
00:08:49,904 --> 00:08:53,116
You're going to pay
to have our set fixed,
221
00:08:53,241 --> 00:08:54,451
Mr. Ricardo.
222
00:08:54,576 --> 00:08:56,327
We are not.
223
00:08:56,453 --> 00:08:57,453
You are too.
224
00:08:57,578 --> 00:08:58,788
We are not.
225
00:08:58,913 --> 00:09:00,457
You are too,
226
00:09:00,582 --> 00:09:02,083
or we'll sue you.
227
00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:05,378
Well, we'll see
who's going to sue who.
228
00:09:05,503 --> 00:09:08,798
Yeah, we'll sue
who's going to see...
229
00:09:08,923 --> 00:09:10,467
Come on, Fred,
230
00:09:10,592 --> 00:09:11,885
let's go.
231
00:09:12,010 --> 00:09:13,553
Good riddance.
232
00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:15,013
Yeah.
233
00:09:17,474 --> 00:09:20,559
Honey, look at
our beautiful set.
234
00:09:22,020 --> 00:09:23,354
Look.
235
00:09:30,487 --> 00:09:32,030
Thanks for the present!
236
00:09:32,155 --> 00:09:34,074
You're welcome!
237
00:09:42,123 --> 00:09:43,333
Hi, honey.
238
00:09:43,458 --> 00:09:44,667
Oh, hi, dear.
239
00:09:44,793 --> 00:09:46,336
How did everything go today?
240
00:09:46,461 --> 00:09:47,462
Oh, everything's fine.
241
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:48,463
That's good.
242
00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:49,923
I spent the whole afternoon
243
00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:52,008
figuring our case
against the Mertzes.
244
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:54,010
No kidding?
Are we going to sue them?
245
00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:56,261
You're darn right
we're going to sue them,
246
00:09:56,386 --> 00:09:57,806
unless he pays for that set.
247
00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,349
What if he sues us first?
248
00:09:59,474 --> 00:10:00,850
They wouldn't dare.
249
00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:02,769
Now, I got the whole thing
figured out, right here.
250
00:10:04,312 --> 00:10:05,188
I'll get it.
251
00:10:05,313 --> 00:10:06,314
All right.
252
00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:10,985
Pardon me, is this
the Lewis apartment?
253
00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:12,654
Oh, no. Mrs. Lewis lives
downstairs in 1A.
254
00:10:12,779 --> 00:10:15,740
Oh, uh-- Say, haven't
I seen you before?
255
00:10:15,865 --> 00:10:18,618
You're...
256
00:10:18,743 --> 00:10:21,162
you're Ricky Ricardo,
aren't you?
257
00:10:21,287 --> 00:10:23,164
Yes.
258
00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:25,958
Oh, gosh,
could I have your autograph?
259
00:10:27,585 --> 00:10:29,254
Sure.
260
00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:33,925
Would you sign it
right there?
261
00:10:39,013 --> 00:10:41,224
There you are, my good man.
262
00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:42,559
Here's your autograph.
263
00:10:42,684 --> 00:10:45,352
On second thought,
maybe you better keep it.
264
00:10:49,899 --> 00:10:53,361
A summons!
265
00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:55,113
A summons?
266
00:10:55,238 --> 00:10:57,782
"The City of New York,
Mertz v. Ricardo."
267
00:10:57,907 --> 00:10:59,784
How do you like that?
268
00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:01,119
They are suing us.
269
00:11:01,244 --> 00:11:03,078
Okay, he asked for it.
270
00:11:03,203 --> 00:11:05,415
We better get
ourselves a lawyer.
271
00:11:05,540 --> 00:11:08,751
Look, I told you, I got
the whole thing figured out.
272
00:11:08,877 --> 00:11:10,253
Who needs a lawyer?
273
00:11:10,378 --> 00:11:12,922
We do.
274
00:11:13,047 --> 00:11:18,178
Now, look, honey, I don't want
any lawyers lousing us up.
275
00:11:18,303 --> 00:11:20,972
I'm going to do it myself.
276
00:11:21,097 --> 00:11:22,974
Here.
277
00:11:23,099 --> 00:11:24,976
What's this?
278
00:11:25,101 --> 00:11:28,438
This is your onrehearsed,
espontaneous testimony.
279
00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:35,236
My "onrehearsed,
espontaneous" testimony.
280
00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:36,738
Right.
281
00:11:36,863 --> 00:11:38,780
And we don't need a lawyer?
282
00:11:38,907 --> 00:11:41,075
Nope.
283
00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:43,410
How about an interpreter?
284
00:11:43,535 --> 00:11:46,039
Now, let's not try to be funny.
285
00:11:46,164 --> 00:11:47,874
I'm trying to think.
286
00:11:47,999 --> 00:11:49,208
Wait a minute.
287
00:11:49,333 --> 00:11:50,877
Oh, I know, here.
288
00:11:51,002 --> 00:11:52,879
You sit here on this chair.
289
00:11:53,004 --> 00:11:54,547
This is the witness chair.
290
00:11:54,672 --> 00:11:56,466
This is the courtroom here.
291
00:11:56,591 --> 00:11:57,800
Now, let's practice.
292
00:11:57,926 --> 00:11:59,260
Okay.
293
00:12:07,184 --> 00:12:10,063
Now, Mrs. Ricardo,
tell us in your own words
294
00:12:10,188 --> 00:12:12,398
what happened on the night
in question.
295
00:12:12,523 --> 00:12:15,068
Well, we went down
to the Mertzes...
296
00:12:15,193 --> 00:12:19,864
No, no, I mean in your own words
that I wrote for you.
297
00:12:21,366 --> 00:12:23,785
Oh.
298
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:26,996
Uh, "Your Honor,
299
00:12:27,121 --> 00:12:30,333
"my grisly little story starts
when my dear, sweet husband
300
00:12:30,458 --> 00:12:32,877
looks adoringly at Ricky,
and I went to..."
301
00:12:33,962 --> 00:12:36,172
"Looks adoringly at Ricky"?
302
00:12:36,297 --> 00:12:38,091
They are directions,
like stage directions.
303
00:12:38,216 --> 00:12:39,425
I put a lot of them in there.
304
00:12:39,550 --> 00:12:40,426
Oh.
305
00:12:40,551 --> 00:12:41,761
They help point things up.
306
00:12:41,886 --> 00:12:43,263
Oh, yeah, yeah.
307
00:12:43,388 --> 00:12:46,307
"When my dear, sweet husband..."
308
00:12:50,602 --> 00:12:53,147
All right, that's long enough.
Go ahead.
309
00:12:56,484 --> 00:12:59,946
"...and I went to help celebrate
the 25th wedding anniversary
310
00:13:00,071 --> 00:13:02,282
"of our landlords,
and then good friends
311
00:13:02,407 --> 00:13:03,866
"Mr. And Mrs. Fred Mertz...
312
00:13:03,992 --> 00:13:05,535
Snarls at Mertzes."
313
00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:07,160
Oh, where will they be?
314
00:13:07,287 --> 00:13:08,496
They'll be
315
00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:10,456
right around there.
316
00:13:15,837 --> 00:13:19,841
Okay, okay, okay.
317
00:13:21,175 --> 00:13:23,177
Okay, that's enough already.
318
00:13:25,972 --> 00:13:29,642
"Little did we dream then
that we'd end up in court...
319
00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:35,189
"before such a handsome
320
00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:38,192
"distinguished, and honorable
jurist as you, Your Honor...
321
00:13:38,318 --> 00:13:39,861
Lift skirts a little higher."
322
00:13:39,986 --> 00:13:42,155
Oh! Really?
323
00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:43,948
Go ahead.
324
00:13:54,708 --> 00:13:56,169
I solemnly swear to tell
the truth, the whole truth,
325
00:13:56,294 --> 00:13:57,962
and nothing but the truth,
so help me.
326
00:13:58,087 --> 00:13:59,339
You may be seated.
327
00:14:07,638 --> 00:14:09,307
Proceed.
328
00:14:13,311 --> 00:14:14,812
Now, uh...
329
00:14:14,937 --> 00:14:16,189
what is your name?
330
00:14:16,314 --> 00:14:20,151
You know my name.
331
00:14:20,276 --> 00:14:22,487
Please tell the court
your name.
332
00:14:22,612 --> 00:14:25,823
Oh. Lucy Ricardo.
333
00:14:25,948 --> 00:14:28,284
Lucy Ricardo.
334
00:14:28,409 --> 00:14:30,953
Now, Mrs. Ricardo,
in your own words,
335
00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:33,289
please tell the court
what happened
336
00:14:33,414 --> 00:14:35,500
in the night in question.
337
00:14:35,625 --> 00:14:38,127
Well, Your Honor,
my grisly little story
338
00:14:38,252 --> 00:14:40,129
starts about three weeks ago
339
00:14:40,254 --> 00:14:42,256
when my dear, sweet husband...
340
00:14:50,306 --> 00:14:51,849
...and I
341
00:14:51,974 --> 00:14:55,019
went to help celebrate
the 25th wedding anniversary
342
00:14:55,144 --> 00:14:57,522
of our landlords
and then good friends
343
00:14:57,647 --> 00:15:00,149
Mr. and Mrs. Fred Mertz.
344
00:15:11,786 --> 00:15:16,541
Okay, Mrs. Ricardo,
please go on.
345
00:15:16,666 --> 00:15:19,252
"Without knowing
and in good faith..."
346
00:15:19,377 --> 00:15:21,337
I object, Your Honor.
347
00:15:21,462 --> 00:15:24,006
The witness has been rehearsed.
348
00:15:24,132 --> 00:15:25,216
Objection sustained.
349
00:15:25,341 --> 00:15:27,218
Proceed, young lady,
but remember,
350
00:15:27,343 --> 00:15:29,345
you're on a witness stand.
351
00:15:29,470 --> 00:15:30,888
Yes, sir.
352
00:15:31,013 --> 00:15:32,223
Uh...
353
00:15:32,348 --> 00:15:34,559
In good faith, but not knowing
354
00:15:34,684 --> 00:15:37,854
they were preparing
to stab us in the back,
355
00:15:37,979 --> 00:15:40,773
we brought them,
as a token of our esteem
356
00:15:40,898 --> 00:15:43,109
an expensive,
20-inch television set.
357
00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:46,279
20 inch!
358
00:15:46,404 --> 00:15:48,614
Little did we dream then
359
00:15:48,739 --> 00:15:51,284
that we would end up in court
360
00:15:51,409 --> 00:15:54,787
in front of such
a... handsome, distinguished
361
00:15:54,912 --> 00:15:56,747
and honorable jurist
362
00:15:56,873 --> 00:15:58,207
as you, Your Honor.
363
00:16:02,378 --> 00:16:04,630
I object, Your Honor.
364
00:16:04,755 --> 00:16:06,424
Objection overruled.
365
00:16:10,219 --> 00:16:12,472
Go on, my dear.
366
00:16:12,597 --> 00:16:14,223
Uh...
367
00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:16,642
Start back with that
368
00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:19,645
"handsome, distinguished,
and honorable jurist."
369
00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:21,397
Oh, yes.
370
00:16:21,522 --> 00:16:24,400
Little did we dream then
that we'd end up in court
371
00:16:24,525 --> 00:16:26,402
before such
a handsome, distinguished
372
00:16:26,527 --> 00:16:29,113
and honorable jurist as you,
Your Honor.
373
00:16:32,575 --> 00:16:37,455
Well, Mr. Fred Mertz
insisted on adjusting the set,
374
00:16:37,580 --> 00:16:41,918
and in spite of my husband's
repeated warnings--
375
00:16:42,043 --> 00:16:45,421
And my husband
is an electronics specialist--
376
00:16:45,546 --> 00:16:47,465
Uh, Mr. Mertz reached in
377
00:16:47,590 --> 00:16:51,135
and ripped off
the back of the set
378
00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:55,806
and suddenly, there was
a big explosion-- poof!
379
00:16:55,932 --> 00:16:58,768
Poof.
380
00:16:58,893 --> 00:17:03,147
And then Mr. Mertz suddenly went
out of his head and ran amok.
381
00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:05,148
And he raced upstairs
to our apartment
382
00:17:05,273 --> 00:17:07,777
and with a fiendish gleam
in his eye
383
00:17:07,902 --> 00:17:11,113
and flecks of foam on his lips,
he went straight
384
00:17:11,239 --> 00:17:14,325
to our television set
and kicked the glass in.
385
00:17:14,450 --> 00:17:18,329
And that's what really happened.
386
00:17:19,580 --> 00:17:20,790
Poor Mrs. Ricardo.
387
00:17:20,915 --> 00:17:22,124
Yeah.
388
00:17:22,250 --> 00:17:25,002
I rest my case, Your Honor.
389
00:17:25,127 --> 00:17:26,921
Attorney for the defense,
390
00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:29,131
would you care
to cross-examine?
391
00:17:29,257 --> 00:17:30,508
No, thanks, Your Honor.
392
00:17:30,633 --> 00:17:32,343
I just want to call a witness
393
00:17:32,468 --> 00:17:34,470
who'll tell us
what really happened.
394
00:17:34,595 --> 00:17:37,013
That will be
for the court to decide.
395
00:17:37,138 --> 00:17:38,266
That's all, Lucy.
396
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:39,809
That's all.
397
00:17:39,934 --> 00:17:41,185
Oh.
398
00:17:43,604 --> 00:17:45,940
Call your witness.
399
00:17:47,525 --> 00:17:51,696
- Mrs. Fred Mertz.
- Mrs. Fred Mertz.
400
00:17:51,821 --> 00:17:52,821
I heard him.
401
00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:57,910
Raise your right hand
and repeat after me:
402
00:17:58,035 --> 00:18:00,371
I solemnly swear to tell
the truth, the whole truth,
403
00:18:00,496 --> 00:18:02,164
and nothing but the truth,
so help me.
404
00:18:02,290 --> 00:18:04,292
I solemnly swear
to tell the truth,
405
00:18:04,417 --> 00:18:06,877
the whole truth
and nothing but the truth,
406
00:18:07,003 --> 00:18:10,339
which is more than someone
in this room did, so help me.
407
00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:12,215
You may sit down.
408
00:18:17,013 --> 00:18:18,888
What are you trying to do--
409
00:18:19,015 --> 00:18:21,017
lose the case for us?
410
00:18:28,648 --> 00:18:29,859
Your name, please.
411
00:18:29,984 --> 00:18:31,193
Ethel Mertz.
412
00:18:31,319 --> 00:18:34,321
Tell the court, please,
just exactly what happened
413
00:18:34,446 --> 00:18:36,240
on the night in question.
414
00:18:36,365 --> 00:18:37,575
Well...
415
00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:40,244
on the night
of our wedding anniversary
416
00:18:40,369 --> 00:18:42,913
the Ricardos came down
to our apartment
417
00:18:43,039 --> 00:18:46,375
and forced their company on us
without being invited.
418
00:18:46,500 --> 00:18:49,086
As an excuse
for an anniversary present,
419
00:18:49,211 --> 00:18:51,756
they brought us
an old, broken-down,
420
00:18:51,881 --> 00:18:53,424
secondhand television set.
421
00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:54,634
Yes, go on.
422
00:18:54,759 --> 00:18:57,428
Well, the set
was playing pretty good,
423
00:18:57,553 --> 00:19:01,098
which is a miracle in itself,
when suddenly, Mr. Ricardo,
424
00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:03,601
or, as he is
more commonly known,
425
00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:04,977
Señor Know-It-All,
426
00:19:05,102 --> 00:19:09,231
took an axe from his pocket
and started hacking it.
427
00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:12,777
It wasn't long before
the set exploded,
428
00:19:12,902 --> 00:19:14,779
and then, this Cuban maniac
429
00:19:14,904 --> 00:19:17,114
forced us all
to go to his apartment
430
00:19:17,239 --> 00:19:19,617
and led us
to his television set
431
00:19:19,742 --> 00:19:22,369
and with a look
of fiendish glee,
432
00:19:22,494 --> 00:19:25,498
picked up my husband's foot
and pushed it
433
00:19:25,623 --> 00:19:26,957
through the glass.
434
00:19:27,083 --> 00:19:29,292
[Fred] That's exactly what
happened, Your Honor.
435
00:19:29,417 --> 00:19:31,504
Your Honor, I object.
436
00:19:31,629 --> 00:19:34,632
Order, order, order!
437
00:19:34,757 --> 00:19:36,008
Order!
438
00:19:36,133 --> 00:19:37,468
Really!
439
00:19:37,593 --> 00:19:38,928
Well.
440
00:19:39,053 --> 00:19:40,930
There would seem to be
441
00:19:41,055 --> 00:19:43,265
some slight discrepancy
in your stories.
442
00:19:43,391 --> 00:19:47,478
I think the only way we can
get at the truth of this
443
00:19:47,603 --> 00:19:49,313
is to reenact the scene.
444
00:19:49,438 --> 00:19:51,732
Bailiff, will you go
into my chambers
445
00:19:51,857 --> 00:19:53,943
and bring out my television set?
446
00:19:54,068 --> 00:19:55,069
Yes, Your Honor.
447
00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:56,737
Now, then,
before we reenact this,
448
00:19:56,862 --> 00:20:00,741
I want to warn you all
that this is a court of law.
449
00:20:00,866 --> 00:20:02,201
You are under oath.
450
00:20:02,326 --> 00:20:06,288
And the penalty for perjury is
$500 or 90 days in jail.
451
00:20:06,414 --> 00:20:08,457
Ew...
452
00:20:10,167 --> 00:20:11,585
That's right.
453
00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:13,462
Bring it right through.
454
00:20:16,799 --> 00:20:19,677
Now, Mrs. Ricardo,
will you show me
455
00:20:19,802 --> 00:20:23,263
exactly how Mr. Mertz pushed
your husband out of the way
456
00:20:23,388 --> 00:20:26,559
and ripped the back
of the set off?
457
00:20:35,776 --> 00:20:37,695
Well...
458
00:20:37,820 --> 00:20:39,029
Your Honor...
459
00:20:39,155 --> 00:20:42,532
now that I think of it,
maybe it was Ricky
460
00:20:42,657 --> 00:20:45,536
that took off
the back of the set.
461
00:20:45,661 --> 00:20:46,912
Really?
462
00:20:47,037 --> 00:20:50,499
Well, now that she thinks
of it, yeah.
463
00:20:52,542 --> 00:20:53,753
[Fred] Yeah!
464
00:20:53,878 --> 00:20:55,671
Now, Mrs. Mertz,
465
00:20:55,796 --> 00:20:58,007
I want you to go over there
466
00:20:58,132 --> 00:21:00,384
and show me
exactly what happened.
467
00:21:00,509 --> 00:21:04,930
Just where did Mr. Ricardo
hit the set with the axe?
468
00:21:12,021 --> 00:21:13,147
Um...
469
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:14,482
now that I...
470
00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:17,276
I don't think it was
exactly an axe.
471
00:21:17,401 --> 00:21:20,696
It was more like
a sort of a screwdriver.
472
00:21:20,821 --> 00:21:22,573
And then what happened?
473
00:21:22,698 --> 00:21:26,160
I'll tell you what happened.
474
00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:28,746
There was a couple
of loose wires
475
00:21:28,871 --> 00:21:32,166
in the back
of this television set--
476
00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:34,167
A red one and a blue one--
477
00:21:34,292 --> 00:21:37,129
And this dope tried
to put them together.
478
00:21:37,254 --> 00:21:39,131
Well, they're supposed
to be together.
479
00:21:39,256 --> 00:21:41,801
[Fred] They are not supposed
to be together.
480
00:21:41,926 --> 00:21:43,469
Look at this set here...
481
00:21:43,594 --> 00:21:45,971
Hey, Your Honor,
they're loose here too.
482
00:21:46,096 --> 00:21:47,181
They are?
483
00:21:47,306 --> 00:21:49,183
The red and the blue.
484
00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:50,518
Let me see.
485
00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:52,436
Pardon me.
486
00:21:52,561 --> 00:21:55,189
Oh, well, just putting
these two wires together
487
00:21:55,314 --> 00:21:58,234
couldn't cause an explosion.
488
00:21:58,359 --> 00:22:00,236
Maybe it couldn't,
but it did.
489
00:22:00,361 --> 00:22:02,112
Now, now, just a minute.
490
00:22:02,238 --> 00:22:05,449
I happen to know something
about television sets myself,
491
00:22:05,574 --> 00:22:07,201
and I know positively
492
00:22:07,326 --> 00:22:09,453
that this could never
cause an explosion.
493
00:22:09,578 --> 00:22:12,122
You must have done
something else.
494
00:22:12,248 --> 00:22:13,666
Did you?
495
00:22:13,791 --> 00:22:17,294
Well, sir, with him
yelling at me all the time...
496
00:22:17,419 --> 00:22:19,296
Yeah, he never shut his mouth.
497
00:22:28,681 --> 00:22:30,683
Quiet! Quiet!
498
00:22:32,685 --> 00:22:35,980
Now, look,
all four of you.
499
00:22:36,105 --> 00:22:37,481
Now, this was obviously
500
00:22:37,606 --> 00:22:42,778
just one of those
misunderstandings among friends.
501
00:22:42,903 --> 00:22:45,990
Now, I want you all
to go into my chambers
502
00:22:46,115 --> 00:22:49,034
and talk this over
and apologize to each other.
503
00:22:49,159 --> 00:22:51,161
After all,
good friends are worth
504
00:22:51,287 --> 00:22:53,664
more than the price
of a television set.
505
00:22:53,789 --> 00:22:54,999
Now, go on.
506
00:22:55,124 --> 00:22:56,542
Take them in, Bailiff.
507
00:22:56,667 --> 00:22:58,544
And when you come out
508
00:22:58,669 --> 00:23:01,463
I want you all
to be pals again.
509
00:23:01,589 --> 00:23:02,923
This way, please.
510
00:23:08,470 --> 00:23:09,597
You were right, Judge.
511
00:23:09,722 --> 00:23:11,265
Good friends are worth more
512
00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:13,183
than the price
of a television set.
513
00:23:13,309 --> 00:23:15,227
Yeah, Judge,
we apologized all around,
514
00:23:15,352 --> 00:23:17,021
and everything's
just dandy now.
515
00:23:17,146 --> 00:23:19,481
Yes, sir. We are going
to pay for their set,
516
00:23:19,607 --> 00:23:21,567
and they're going to pay
for our set.
517
00:23:21,692 --> 00:23:23,152
Ah, that's wonderful,
wonderful.
518
00:23:23,277 --> 00:23:24,737
Thank you very much.
519
00:23:24,862 --> 00:23:26,363
You've sure been nice.
520
00:23:26,488 --> 00:23:27,489
Not at all.
521
00:23:27,615 --> 00:23:29,407
Thank you very much.
522
00:23:29,532 --> 00:23:30,618
Thank you, Judge.
523
00:23:30,743 --> 00:23:32,744
Now, let this be a lesson
524
00:23:32,869 --> 00:23:33,913
to all of us.
525
00:23:34,038 --> 00:23:37,166
We must never lose our tempers.
526
00:23:37,291 --> 00:23:38,250
Good-bye.
527
00:23:38,375 --> 00:23:39,376
We remember.
528
00:23:39,501 --> 00:23:40,461
Thank you, Judge.
529
00:23:40,586 --> 00:23:41,545
Good-bye.
530
00:23:41,670 --> 00:23:42,838
Good-bye, Judge.
531
00:24:35,140 --> 00:24:38,102
The part of the judge
was played by Moroni Olsen,
532
00:24:38,227 --> 00:24:40,104
the process server
by Harry Bartell
533
00:24:40,229 --> 00:24:42,523
and the bailiff
by Robert B. Williams.
35501
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