All language subtitles for M.t.R.S01E05.Back.in.the.Game.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-RAWR_track3_[eng]

Morning, how are you?

I can sort of see you.
Perfect.
Yeah.

It's slightly like Big Brother
is watching you.

Shame on you!
Shame on you!

You're a wanker!

I hope I don't get a Cease and
Desist letter from Johnnie Boden,

"Could you please not wear
my clothes,

you awful Tory, right-wing,
fox-hunting Brexiteer."

They sound the horn
and off they all go. Magnificent.

I'm well aware that there are risks
in reality TV.

A worse result at a General Election

than John Major's defeat in 1997.

From the ashes of disaster
grow the roses of success.
Are you okay?

Let's go to Disneyland Paris
in France!

A top priority is to go to
the battlefields.

Jacob Rees-Mogg!

Could always go for Strictly
or I'm A Celeb.

Hur-hur-hur-hur.
I feel in a terrible state
of undress.

How do you feel about
following in this long line of
family documentaries?

I think this will be a rather
different kettle of fish
from The Kardashians.

Why?Well, I've no idea 'cause
I've never watched the programmes
about them, so I don't have a clue.

Please be gone.
Vote Conservative!

We are now in opposition.
We have no power.

The chauffeurs have gone,
the red boxes have gone.

The power, the excitement,
the charisma of power

has been taken away from us.

Jacob Rees-Mogg is out of touch
with reality.

The size of the defeat
was simply a measure

of the gross incompetence
on every front.

I hope we won't even consider
another Tory government
in the next decade.

The Conservative Party has laid out
the timetable

for finding its next leader.

Maybe this will be the end
of the Tory Party,

if they make a mistake
in this leadership contest.

This leadership election is pretty
fundamental for the Tory Party

because the Tory Party
did stunningly badly

at the last election.

It was our worst election result,
in terms of number of seats,

since 1761.

That gives you an idea of
the historic contest

of how bad it was.

Wanker!

I'm sorry I lost.
I wanted to carry on doing it.

And there is a certain frustration,

now I'm no longer
a member of parliament.

So, for the Tory leadership.

Well, I'm not a Tory member
of parliament anymore,
as you all know.

GB News fortunately keeps me busy.

That's absolutely great because
I've already got something.

Jacob, well done.
Great stuff.

So then it's thinking about
what else to do.

Do you think being part of GB News
is good for him?

I think it'll help him to keep him,
like, relevant, you know?

Because otherwise it's like
you kind of go into, like,
political wilderness.

I'm not actually very good
at doing nothing.

I'm quite good at sleeping, but I'm
not very good at doing nothing.

So I always think of something
to do.

Having a couple of sheep,
I'd like to have more.

Perhaps having bees.

Making cider is something I feel is
very much part of what do I do next.

Shall I tip you into there?
No!No? Okay, then.

Today we're gonna make cider.
We usually do it one weekend

in October.

And we get the machinery going
and that mushes up the apples.

Then they get pressed. You then get
the most delicious apple juice.

And then Shaun works some magic
and it turns from apple juice
into cider.

I like your hat,
Sixtus. What does it say?

"Make Tories Conservative again."

Oh, you're going to take it like
that, are you?Oh, no, I can't.

I can't.
Let's take it together.

Come on, crew.

There we go. But don't pull
my arm off, old bean.

Bet Labour will try and tax us
on it.

because it's free.

They don't like you doing anything
for free, do they?

Right.

I've got some hard-wearing tweed
which will survive
pretty much anything.

And I've got enough ties that
if one of them gets covered in cider

there's another one
that can take its place.

Off you go. Walk round.

Faster.

Yeah, he's enjoying t.
He's getting into it.

You'll sleep well tonight.

This is literally a child-powered
cider press.

Come on! Keep going.

This is good child labour, innit?

They're lucky he ain't down a pit.

Done?

Ninety litres. Not a bad day's work.

Mother's milk.

So this is the first tasting.
No, I tasted it earlier.

By me.
Yes.

First tasting by me of...
It's delicious.

...the 2024 in preparation cider,

routine apple juice.

Cheeks will get much redder
from Charterhouse to Cheddar

because there's still more cider
in the jar

and we have gallons of cider
in the jar.

It's very good. It's not as sweet
as it is some years.

I'd say it's a little bit sharper.

Rocket fuel.

Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
They can drink the juice.

Strong?

That'll put hairs on your chest.

"Impressively hot and humid."

Hi, Nanny. How are you getting on
with the crossword?Not very well.

I can't do it today.
It's too difficult.

What about that long one
in the middle? Seventeen.

"Occult sorcerer."

Oh, that's a necromancer.
Oh, my goodness.

N-E-C...

N-E-C-R-O

M-A-N-C-E-R.

Veronica is the key member
of the Rees-Mogg family.

She predates me.
She joined us 59 years ago

and she really is
absolutely remarkable.

What has Nanny
taught you, Jacob?

The foundation of life.

To keep calm and carry on,
for want of a better term.

In the famous nanny's phrase,
er, "hope for the best,

expect the worst
and accept the result."

That's fiesta. Celebration carnival.
Oh, right.

Now you've done so well on
the crossword, you win the prize.

I thought we should have a party
for your 59 years.

So do you think we should invite
some of the nannies and

get a few people over?
Have a little sort of tea party,

probably is the better time.
That sounds nice.

Plus champagne?
Oh, that sounds very nice.

Perhaps something bigger next year,
when it's 60 years. Diamond Jubilee.

Do you think I'll last that long?
You've got no choice. We need you.

We're not letting you off
that easily, Nanny.

Well, we're having a little party
for Nanny, not a huge party.

But we're having a few of Nanny's
friends round

and just a little celebration
of 59 glorious years.

I think that's done.

Nice to see some nannies
I haven't seen for a while.

Nice to have them round
for a cup of tea

and a glass of something stronger,
if we're lucky.

Some cider, do you think?
And some cider.

No, not cider.

All right, sweetheart? Yes, Daddy
and I are going out to dinner.

Bye. Um, good night, love.
Good night.

We are going to dinner
at a wonderful steak restaurant

in Jermyn Street, which I've been to
a number of times before.

Thank you. Hello.

I hope I'm not late.
No, no, I've only just got here.

Thank goodness. Okay.

Thank you.
Remind me, what is chorizo?

It's spicy sausage.
It's spicy. Okay. It's not like...
Yeah, yeah, no, all right.

Jacob,
would you call yourself a romantic?

No.

Why not?

Well, I think it's not very British.

What do you think
you'd like to drink?

Resist the temptation
to reply "lots."

How are we getting on?
Very well, thank you.

Are you ready to order?
Thank you.

Please could I have the fillet
steak?How would you like it cooked?

Medium-well.

Dinner conversation
does often turn to politics
in some form or another.

So I was very pleased. Um,

the very nice and good
Chairman of the Tory Party,
Richard Fuller, rang me up,

to ask if I could potentially speak
at the Party Conference.

Oh, wow. To which we were going
anyway, I sincerely hope.Yeah.

Well done.
But it would be quite fun to do.

Politics is definitely
one of his great loves.

Politics, Catholicism,

history and cricket.

Oh, and us.

It's too early to say. It slightly
depends who the leader of
the party is,

and whether the Conservatives
have a hope.Mmm.

There are sort of irons in the fire
and we'll see what comes up.

I think Jacob was married
to the Conservative Party
before he was married to me.

So we've got cucumber sandwiches,

egg sandwiches,
and smoked salmon sandwiches.

Have we got enough teapots
and things here?

Er, we have, I'm sure.
Okay, well I'll find all that.

Hello, hello.
Everything under control?
Fairy cakes? Excellent!

Did you make those, Nanny?No.
Oh, Nicky made the fairy cakes?

I did.How delicious.
And cucumber sandwiches.
Every luxury.

We've got some champagne
in the fridge,

so everything is ready.

P. I need a P. I need a P.

A. A. A. A.

I need a double N.
I also needs N's.

The 20th of September is

Veronic's Nanniversary,
as I call it.

The anniversary of when she started
working for the Rees-Moggs,

when she was 21.

Oh, there's no A's here!

"Happy Nanniversary", that's what
I'm gonna be putting.
On the front at least.

I wouldn't have had such good food
if it wasn't for Nanny.

I would have had Mummy food,
which...Mummy food is good.

It's questionable.
What?

It's not as good as Nanny's.

Other than Mary Poppins,

Veronica is probably one of
Britain's best-known nannies,

thanks to all the column inches
that have been written

over the decades about her
in association with Jacob.

The satirists, needless to say,
find it hilarious

that Jacob Rees-Mogg
still has his nanny around.

No A. Not one! There's no A's!

Glitter!

Shush.
I found the glitter.

The A has gone!

Please do not thump.

Jacob absolutely adores
Veronica. And understandably.

Bah!

He's very lucky to have her
looking after his children,

not leaving halfway through

because she decided to retire
or anything.

She's slightly worried
that the children might let her down
and show her up.

She said, "I hope they don't
show me up in front of my friends

and my friends think I'm doing a bad
job and should actually retire."

I need an A!
It's not ending very well.

I can't finish
this stupid card!

I can't find an A!

How different are

your second generation of Rees-Mogg
children to the original generation?

I'm afraid modern age...
No, give me the old set-up.

Just more civilised.

You can share.

Sixtus, no. No kickboxing.

Now they're rampaging, clambering up
walls and all sorts of, er,
carryings on.

Did you ever want a family yourself
at all?

I never thought about it too much.

I was too busy looking after
everybody else's children.

So I didn't really...
That didn't happen.

And were you ever married at all,
Veronica?No. No.

That would have been quite a
revelation if you'd said, "Oh, yes."

"When I was 16."

I was telling the truth.
Oh, my goodness.

That would have been a surprise.

How are you feeling about
your charges?

I read the Riot Act this morning.

They'll think that Nanny couldn't
look after a donkey.

Give it a push, Jean.

Oh, hello.
Hello, Veronica.
Lovely to see you, Jean.

So, Veronica, how do you know Jean?
Oh, I've known Jean...

I tell you what,
we were the Conservatives.

Yes, and Jacob introduced us,
didn't he?Yes, he did.

It was the Tories
that got us together.Yes, it was.

Hello, Barbara. Hello.
Nice to see you.
Veronica, how are you?

Fifty-seven years, is it,
with Jacob?Fifty-nine.

Fifty-nine. Gosh.
I love your red shoes.

Well...
They're lovely.

They're killing my corns.
So are mine.

Cup of tea?
How lovely. Thank you.

Hello. Hello.

Jessy.
Yes. Lovely to see you.

My former lady's chairman,
in the good old days.

Barbara.
I know all of you so well

by reputation and the stories
that I've heard.

These nanny gatherings
are quite something.

Did you think at 80 you could be
running after seven year olds?

I probably could, yes.

But I wouldn't want to.
Want to.

I think I've done my bit.

Have I got to have a second?
Yes.Have I got to be greedy?
Oh, my goodness.

Well, I will have a sausage.

Most of the people here Veronica's
known for at least 40 years.

And some of them probably remember
me as a very annoying little child.

I will have one of these.
Thank you very much.

Wow, look at that!
Oh, it's got stuck.

Oh, dear. You were a bit
heavy-handed with the glue.

"Happy 59th Anniversary.

Love, Alfred."
Oh, thank you very much.
I think I...

Thank you very much, Sixtus.
Thank you.

Sixtus and Alfred are being
absolutely brilliant.
They're not showing Veronica up.

"Nanny is the best."Wow!
Three exclamation marks.
"Love from Sixtus."

Are you going to the conference?
I am.

I used to love going to the
conference. It was like our Ascot.

It's, um, Helena
and my weekend away.

It's about the only time each year
when we do go away together
without the children.

So who are they gonna choose
as the leader?

We need somebody who is
going to be Conservative,

because we've just been
too wishy-washy.

Oh, good.

Thank you all for coming.
I'm sorry, you never get to visit me
without getting a speech.

It's compulsory.

She's been the centre of the family.
She's been loyal and kindly.

The wooden spoon has often been
threatened but never used.

I want to have a toast

to Nanny.

Fifty-nine years, and to looking
after the next generation.

So, the next 60 years.

Veronica, can you imagine life
without Jacob and the Rees-Moggs?

No, I can't actually. No.
I'd be lost without them.

I'm gonna need quite a lot of
looking after as I get older,

so Nanny's got to remain on duty.

Nanny, I need you to stand up.
There we go.

If we measure her,

it says, "Practically perfect
in every way."

Our very own Mary Poppins.

Hail Mary, full of grace,
the Lord is with thee.

Blessed art thou amongst women
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of god,
pray for us sinners, now
and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

Where are you off to, Helena?
Off to Birmingham.

Er, for the annual
Conservative Party Conference

with Jacob. We go every year.

It's our annual two or three days
away a deux, just the two of us.

Jacob obviously no longer
a Conservative candidate

or member of parliament, but, er,
too bad.

We've probably got to
the Millwall Football Club stage -

no one likes us, we don't care.

Um, but we're going anyway.

Angel of God, my guardian dear,
to whom His love commits me here.

Ever this day be at my side
to light and guard,
to rule and guide. Amen.

I'm obviously not eligible
to stand for Leader

as I'm not an MP,
even if I wanted to.

But there are other things
that you can do.

That obviously is dependent on
supporting the right candidate,

the one who wins.

I love politics. It's, along with
regular cups of coffee,
what keeps me ticking over.

I haven't stopped crying
since the General Election.

I imagine that the Conservative
Party Conference this year

will be possibly smaller than usual.

Um, maybe less well attended.

More downbeat, obviously,
following a massive kicking
by the electorate back in July.

Fortunately, because there's
a leadership election this year,

Party Conference is going to be

the gladiatorial arena
for the four remaining candidates.

Tom Tugendhat, Kemi Badenoch,

James Cleverly and Robert Jenrick.

And they're all good candidates.
They're all people I like.

But I've always thought highly
of Robert Jenrick and got on well
with him.

How are you?
Very well.Good, good.

I don't look like too much of
a drowned rat?

I greatly enjoy attending
the various debates,

or panels, or whatever Jacob
is taking part in.

But I definitely also enjoy
looking round all the stands

and visiting
the shopping opportunities there.

Oh, hello!

Hello, darling.

Here we go, here we go, here we go.

You may be about to discover that
I do a good chunk of my Christmas
shopping at the party shop.

"This food is not for burning."

Well, that's Jacob's
sense of humour.

Conservative socks.

Anselm's socks always seem to
vanish. Perhaps he needs
Conservative socks.

Alfred's gonna get
a Winston Churchill water bottle,
whether he likes it or not, I think.

For our next member debate,

on protecting free speech,
please welcome Fleur Butler

and Jacob Rees-Mogg.

It's very flattering to be asked
because

I'm not sure the organisers
of the Party Conference
were that keen

to get me on the main stage
when I WAS in the government,
let alone now I'm not in it.

And you, ladies and gentlemen,

you, the real heroes of
conservatism,

you are the ones who are here.
You're the ones

who, after an election that did not
go entirely according to plan,

have come through the rain and
the storms to get to Birmingham

to back our party, to remain
with the party. Thank you so much.

The Party Conference
is an opportunity

for people to speak freely,
particularly after an election
defeat,

and having members' debates
and to ignore the wokerati.

We must defend
freedom of speech, to hold back
the tide of stupidity.

Because I was
a biology teacher,

I know what a woman is.

On my union Facebook page,

they advertised Drag Queen Bingo.

Outside Nigel Farage's local pub,

I should think the Tory Party
Conference is the least woke place
you could find.

Angus Allan,
Colchester constituency,

I identify as a Conservative.

I'm gonna fall off the end
if I'm not careful.
Morning, Jacob.

Morning. How are you?
Good, good.

Caught in all directions.
Hello.I'm a massive fan.

Oh, what a nice thing to say!
Can I get a quick selfie?
Three, two, one.

This is the life.
The Conservative Party family.
I'm part of that family

as much as I'm part of
the Rees-Mogg family.

Politics is in my blood.

I really can't see myself
taking up knitting.

Okay. There you go.
I took a couple.Thank you.

Politics, as far as I'm concerned,

is getting the wind that kindles
a great blaze.

And I can't pretend that the winds
that blew at the conference

didn't re-ignite what was
pretty much there anyway.

Thank you.
My pleasure. Thank you.

It's not one of those things
you can just switch off.

I can now give you the results
of the fourth and final
parliamentary ballot.

James Cleverly has been
sensationally knocked out

of the leadership contest today.

It is going to be between
Robert Jenrick and Kemi Badenoch.

They are the two Tory leadership
candidates

who will now be going
to the members to fight it out.

Hello, hello, hello.
How's my great boy?

I'm fine.
You're fine?

Was that your mother's
birthday cake from yesterday?Yes.

Would you like some?
I won't actually, thank you.

Have you done your reading?
Yes, they did it on the bus.
Oh, well done.

I picked him up at four
and he, um, did more of the Maths.

And he's nearly finished.

Then he had his violin ensemble
and they both did their reading
on the bus home.

But he's got to finish his Maths
'cause it's due tomorrow.
He started it on the train.

Hello.

Mummy! Mummy!
Get down.

Why?
Get down. Where you were.

I want to do it.

Um, Anselm, Alfred, Sixtus,

can you keep a secret?
Yes.

And you mustn't mention this
to anybody.

It may become public, but you
mustn't mention it to anybody.

All right.

Robert Jenrick just rang.
Oh, yes?To say

if he, um, gets the leadership,
would I become the Party Chairman?

Yes!
So that's... I mean, I...

I said I'd get back to him soon.

Robert and I
have always been friendly.

We've always got on. We got on when
we were in the cabinet together.

So no, I was absolutely astonished.

You'll get off making me lunch every
day 'cause I won't be in for lunch.

Jacob, that's brilliant. That was
mentioned at the Party Conference.
Dan Hannon has been suggesting it.

It is a great job. And in
opposition, it's a fantastic job

because you try and get the Tories
ready for re-election.

Jacob has always relished
the cut and thrust of
party politics

and would absolutely relish
the opportunity

to sort of get back out
on the campaign trail

in some form or other.

It is a job I would absolutely
love to do.

I'd love to try and reform the
party, revitalise the membership.

If I want to be
maintaining a profile,

I could go into the jungle.
That's not what I want to do.

I want to be part of rebuilding
the Conservative Party.

- Right. Ready to make
the Guy?- Yep.

Make his legs look
fairly respectable.

That's good.

What's going on here, then?

This is making the Guy
for November 5th.

Do you do this every year, Veronica?
Every year, for years.

Look at this.
Shaun makes a bonfire,

and we make the Guy,

and then they have a bit of a party,
fireworks display, don't we?

Oh, you hold him
and I'll show you what we do.

You cut a hole in his backside.

And then put a stick through it.
Right there.Aha.

What do you know of
the Guy Fawkes story?

All I know is...

is that he tried to blow up
the Houses of Parliament.

He tried to kill the King,

about 10,000 million other people.

He looks like a creep now.
My goodness.

I don't think the poor man
was smiling like that

on the stretcher thing
that they put him on.

Stand the poor man up again.

I know, what about
a little moustache?

That'll make him look
more like a man.

It looked rubbish.

It was the worst Guy
I've ever seen in my life.

Oh, dear, he is a disaster!

Good morning, Robert.
Ready to hit the campaign trail?
Absolutely. Ready and full of beans.

Very nice to see you.
Nice to see you. Um... Excellent.

Onwards and upwards.
Onwards and upwards.

Um, where do you sit?

I said I'll do as I'm told.
You're our VIP.

No, no, you're the candidate.

You're the racehorse.

For me to become Tory Party
Chairman, Robert has to win,

which I obviously want him to do.

Oh, Miss Warman, hello. It's, um,
Jacob Rees-Mogg, um, calling

on behalf of Robert Jenrick
for his campaign,

um, in the hope that you might be
thinking of lending him your vote

in the leadership election.

Oh, no! Oh, what a pity.
Oh, well, never mind.

Hi, my name's Christopher.
I'm volunteering on behalf of...
I'm Bryce, calling on behalf of...

The real attraction is that it is
a challenge.

The frontline
doesn't really matter.

That's why he's asked me to be
Party Chairman,

because, um,
I've always been somebody

who's thought the membership
are the lifeblood of the party.

Jacob is really popular
with the Conservative Party members
'cause he's a true Conservative.

There was some polling that said
that after Winston Churchill

and Margaret Thatcher,
he was the next most Conservative,

the most popular Conservative.
And, of course, the others are dead,

so Jacob was...
...was the best person
that we could turn to.

Right, Jacob, we're outside
Conservative Central Office

and both of us share
a determination to transform

this organisation,
but the party itself.

In a Tory leadership,
it's very hard

to get through to members,

so Robert's doing
a lot of social media,

particularly aimed at younger
Tory Party members

who are more likely
to see things online.

And it needs to do modern
campaigning techniques,

it needs to understand social media
and appeal to younger voters.

But crucially, it needs to stop
condescending to our members.

Did that car get in the way?

We probably have to do it again.
I don't think it would do to have
a Bentley parking next to us.No.

All political parties at all times
need to reinvent themselves
to appeal to the next generation.

And making sure that you,
once again,

feel proud to be part of our party.

Clearly the bells are ringing
heavenly for you.
Very good.

Is that gonna work? There was
someone who was scantily clad
at the window.

That was quite something.

Nice. That's good.

Today there is a photo shoot
at Gournay Court for the series.

That's lovely. That's really nice.

Not particularly used to
photo shoots.

"Would you turn around
and look out of the window?"
"No." "Oh, okay, then."

How will I not look like
a complete div?

Is he ready yet?
He's just being done.

What? I haven't brushed his hair.
They're just setting up.
Oh, thank God, they're setting up.

Hold him. Sorry.
Someone hold him still, please.

There we go.

I'm trying to make sure that
everyone looks vaguely respectable.

He looks like he's going to
restart the Third Reich.

He is not going to restart
the Third Reich.

Can you please not be unhelpful?
It is a little bit German.

Just go away, you two.

She's a momager.
She's good at directing people.

If you've got six kids,
you've got to...

you've got to be good at that.
You're the boss.

No, no, no, no, no!
Do not mess it up.

I'll do it again.
No, I'll do it again.No!

You're not on yet anyway, so...

No, don't brush my hair!
I don't want brushed hair!

I need to chill out slightly.

I think we are now ready for Alfred.
Good.Yeah?

Oh, Alfred.
No.

Just slightly. Can you brush
your own hair then, please?

The younger children posed
with props, which was quite fun.
That's nice.

I did not pose with any props.

One of the children unwisely
suggested hunting whip.

Ah, traditional rural pursuit.

And other people will probably think
sexual deviant.

We have got Alfred. Mary was here
a moment ago. We've got Nanny.

No, those are none of my children.
Just making sure.

Sixtus?

Is there still no Sixtus?

The truth is,
getting all six children

in the same place at any one point
is extremely difficult.

I'm only doing one photo.
Right, well it'll be very quick.

Come on then, we need
your photograph taken.

Right, let's get everybody
sitting down who is here.

Three, two, one.
And say cheese.

That's good. That's lovely.
Or Brexit.Or Brexit.

Firework day today.
Aye, I know. You ready?

No.

So I reckon sausage rolls first.

And then we've got flapjacks.
We'll walk round with them.

They're not gonna eat their dinner.
What, this family? Course they will.

They're like bottomless pits.

Why are we having the bonfire night
tonight?

'Cause Jacob's going to London
tomorrow. It's the Conservative
leadership election.

Who do you think's gonna win?

I think Jenrick should win.
Yeah, if Jenrick wins,

Jacob's gonna be Party Chairman.

Oh, right.So he'll get his foot
back into politics again,

which he'll be happy about, yeah.

'Cause he's, um...
Bored.

A bit bored, yeah. A bit like
a lost sheep at the moment.

I don't think he planned
for this really.No.

That'd be good for him.
Yeah.

Has Daisy gone already?
She's up there.

Shut the door. Heating bill.

We're gonna go and make a bonfire.

Let's do it like that, look. Got it?
Yeah.

That's it.

Yeah, that'll do. That's perfect.
Yeah.

Mary, what's that
you've got to help with the bonfire?

It's Daddy. He's very helpful.

He's a useful man. A working man.

What are they, flyers or something?
I think it's just flyers.Yeah.

The ones he was posting
through the letterbox, weren't it?

Didn't work, did it?
No, obviously not.

Everybody voted for the wrong side.
Yeah.

That's it.

Yeah, that's it. Will he stay there?

Do you think that looks like anyone
at all?

If you put some glasses on it
it'd look like Keir Starmer.

A bit of a nod to your dad?

Yeah, I suppose it's a bit of a...

Yeah, they're gonna love that,
aren't they, that top hat thing.

I must get Mary. Yes, thank you.
Come on.

Stand up straight, please. Now.
Where's the fireworks?

Paddock.

Every year we have
a bonfire. Veronica makes a Guy

and we do burn it. So yes.

I can't do this twice, you know,
we've got to get it first time.

Catholic family burns Papist effigy
annually. Shock, horror.

Nanny's made an excellent Guy.

She was being very modest about it
earlier, but it's absolutely
splendid.

There we go, Veronica.
The Guy's going.

It's going up terrifically.
Nice, innit?

Mmm. It's warm though, isn't it?

That is a terrific flame.

Ah! There goes the head.

Hope the hedge isn't gonna
catch fire.

Of course they didn't burn
Guy Fawkes anyway,

they hanged, drew and quartered him.

But he died
whilst he was being hanged.

Shaun, where's our base? Here?
Yeah.

Right, what's the plan of attack?
Just light anything, innit.

There we go.

Light whichever one you want.
Going for the big one first,
are you?

Back in here again.

Sixtus's, this one.

That's the last of the Sixtus nukes.

God, that was quite a bang.

Peter's got keener and keener
to be involved with fireworks.

I think boys and young men

like setting fire to things.

There is an inner pyromaniac
in most boys.

We did a very good job there, Shaun,
I thought.I thought we did.

The biggest buck for your bang
came from Sixtus's choice of
fireworks.

His plan was clearly to wake up
the whole of West Harptree,

and he did a pretty good job.
But he usually does that anyway,

without the fireworks, so...

So tomorrow we've got opening meet.
You're going to London.

Yeah, I'm gonna go to London
after dinner this evening.
Oh, really?Yeah, yeah.

Because I need to be in
Northumberland Avenue by 10:30.

They're announcing it about 11:00.

Then we'll see what happens,
but my broad expectation is

I will come back after that.
Mmm.

But there may be changes to plans
if Robert wins, obviously.

Well, er, good luck tomorrow.

Either way we'll have a very good
Conservative Party leader.

Okay.

The Conservative Party needs
its spark being relit.

The spark went out.

These 48 hours, find out
if Robert Jenrick's campaign
is going with a bang or a whimper.

Wonderful.
I completely forgot about
marshmallows.

This weighs a ton.
I'd forgotten how heavy it was.

Where are you off to this morning?
Thomas, Sixtus and I have got

Mendip Farmers Hunt opening meet.

But Jacob is in London.

It's the results of the Conservative
Party leadership contest.

Done. There we go. Right.
Stomp, stomp, stomp.

Other foot, please.

Thank you.

It would mean a lot to Jacob

to become
Conservative Party Chairman.
It'd be a huge honour.

If Robert Jenrick doesn't win,

of course he would be disappointed.

I would love to be Party Chairman.

I've always thought it was
an interesting job.

Um, indeed, once talking to Boris,
before he won the leadership,

I said one of the jobs I'd love
to do would be Party Chairman.

The odds are on Kemi winning.

But politics is very unpredictable.

We've had lots of upsets
in recent years

when opinion polls
turned out to be wrong.

It's the old saying attributed to
nannies - expect the worst,

hope for the best
and accept the result.

Rob's done unbelievably.
He's done very well.

He's been brilliant.
He's been very impressive.
Outstanding. Incredible.

In half an hour,
I will be discovering

whether I become
the Party Chairman

and going to be enormously busy,
or whether I shall be going to
Somerset for dinner. Time will tell.

Good morning,
ladies and gentlemen.

Now, the time you've been
waiting for - the result.

Kemi Badenoch, 53,806 votes.

And Robert Jenrick, 41,000...

Oh, my phone's ringing.

It's Jacob. Hello.

Oh, hello. How are you?
I'm very well, thanks.

You're safely on board?
You haven't fallen off?
Um, so far, yes.

Good, good, good.
Er, what news?

Um, Kemi won. And pretty much
in line with the, um,

Conservative Home poll.
So, as expected.

Kemi two thirds, Robert one third.
Broadly, yes.

Well done, Robert, but it was not
to be.No, that's right.

No, Kemi's done very well
and she has the great advantage

or charisma, which is very powerful
in a leader.Absolutely, yes.

Definitely not boring,
which is brilliant, yeah.

No, we'll be lucky to have her.

Um, and um, there we go.

And I shall be zooming back
to Somerset fairly shortly.

Brilliant. We will much look forward
to seeing you later. Lots of love,
darling.Thank you. Bye-bye. Bye.

Right. Okay.
How did he sound?

Oh, absolutely fine. Jacob always
sounds absolutely fine.

There we go.

Right, see you later.

Is this the pose?
Or is this the pose?

Yeah, there you go.
Your pose is giving

Daddy in the House of Commons.

Now you look like
you're contemplating

your life choices.

No Party Chairman for Daddy, then.

But then he can come home more.
Yeah, it means we get Daddy back.

Oh, yeah.

That's sad.

It's not me giving up on politics.
Never say die.

We carry on. See what happens next.

It's certainly not the end
of Jacob Rees-Mogg.

I wouldn't worry. He'll pop up,
one way or another, somewhere,
doing something.

To quote Churchill,
"It is not the end,

it is not even the beginning
of the end, but it may be the end
of the beginning."

One has to keep going on.
But one mustn't let

the temporary setbacks of life
get one down.

As they say, the opera isn't over
until the fat lady sings.

Perhaps I should, um,
re-identify as a fat lady.