All language subtitles for Just Write (1998) 480p

♪ A long, long time ago ♪

♪ I can still remember ♪

♪ How that music
used to make me smile ♪

♪ And I knew
if I had my chance ♪

♪ That I could make
those people dance ♪

♪ And maybe they'd be happy
for a while ♪

♪ But February
made me shiver ♪

♪ With every paper
I'd deliver ♪

♪ Bad news on the doorstep ♪

♪ I couldn't take
one more step ♪

♪ I can't remember
if I cried ♪

♪ When I read about
his widowed bride ♪

♪ But something touched me
deep inside ♪

♪ The day ♪

♪ The music died ♪

♪ So, bye-bye
Miss American Pie... ♪

Harold: When I was a kid,
I asked a buddy of mine what
his parents did for a living.

He had no idea,
he thought they stole shoes.

I knew exactly
what my parents did.

They ran a tour bus company,
and my father had
this tour bus cap,

and it was like a crown.

I used to give my
super-special tour

to all the kids
in the neighborhood.
They loved it.

I didn't wanna go to heaven
or hell like everybody else,

I wanted to go
to Beverly Hills.

I wanted to roam
through the mansions

and just see
whatever movie stars do
when no one's around.

From the time
I was 6 years old,
I knew what I wanted to do.

You know, I wanted
to be a tour bus driver.

You know,
and I'm pretty good at it.

[rock music playing]

Nice to see you, Governor.
Welcome to Trolleywood Tours.

Excellent. I don't know
if you're tall enough
to go on this ride,

but please enjoy yourself.

We have a metal detector,
so anything you're wearing

could be used against you
in a court of law.
Nice to see you.

Welcome to Trolleywood Tours.

It's an hour and 15 minute tour,
everybody.

♪ Here we are,
here we are ♪

♪ Acting like
we're different ♪

♪ I'm not really different ♪

♪ Here we are, here we are ♪

♪ Acting like it matters ♪

♪ Nothing really matters
after all ♪

♪ It's good to see you
Jacquelyn ♪

♪ You wear
your mileage well ♪

♪ That's just
what you tell me ♪

[song continues]

♪ And it seems to me ♪

♪ Voted you most likely ♪

♪ You turned out to be ♪

♪ Most unhappy ♪

♪ Here we are, here we are ♪

♪ Acting like
we're different ♪

♪ I'm not any different ♪

♪ Here we are, here we are ♪

♪ Acting like it matters ♪

♪ Nothing really matters
after all ♪

♪ Happy birthday, Marilyn ♪

♪ See you've changed
your style ♪

♪ But you're still hidin' ♪

♪ I guess I'm doing fine ♪

♪ But I don't get
much sleep ♪

♪ I've done a lot of lyin' ♪

♪ And it seems to me ♪

♪ Voted you most likely ♪

♪ The signs were
always there ♪

♪ But you inside
could never care ♪

♪ And it seems to me ♪

♪ We used to spend
our time acting ♪

♪ Now that we're free ♪

♪ We don't do
much of anything ♪

♪ Here we are, here we are ♪

♪ Acting like
we're different ♪

♪ I'm not any different ♪

♪ Here we are, here we are ♪

♪ Acting like it matters ♪

♪ Nothing really matters
after all ♪

♪ Here we are, here we are ♪

♪ Here we are
here we are ♪

-♪ Here we... ♪
-[tape tangling]

[music stops]

Well, there goes the music.

I guess we'll do the rest
of the tour a cappella,
everybody.

Welcome to Beverly Hills.

Your first attraction
is here on your left.

John Travolta is actually
adding a wing to his home.

And right next to him,
Sharon Stone.

I think they may even be
building a tunnel underneath.

Can only imagine what
those pajama parties are like.

And right up here on the right,
we have the home

where Gloria Swanson
used to live.

You remember Gloria from
the film Sunset Boulevard.

She played the actress
that shot the young writer,

William Holden, in the back,
but that was years ago.

Today we have the director
for that...

Today-- Today we have
the director for that.

Wow. I know this mic is on
because I can hear you sleeping.

Right here on your left,
I believe Zsa Zsa Gabor

slapped Cher's pool boy
16 times.

Ha ha! That's not true.
Kidding.

[trolley bell clangs]

If you look up to your left,
ladies and gentlemen,

you'll see
two wonderful tennis courts.

The Van Pattens live here.

You know, Dick Van Patten
from TV's Eight is Enough.

Wonderful man.

Combs his hair from right here,
throws it all the way over.

Everybody wins.

A little bit of trivia
for you guys.

Uh, Spencer Tracy was brought
out of retirement

by Katharine Hepburn
to do one last film.

That film was
Guess Who's Coming
to Dinner,

starring opposite the pioneer
in his own right,

Mr. Sidney Poitier,
who happens to live
right to the left of us.

Mr. Sidney Poitier.

Okay. I believe
Jean-Claude Van Damme

made an offer on that home
right there.

-[excited murmurs]
-Woman: Where, where, where?

-[tourists gasping]
-Okay.

[trolley bell clangs]

We're gonna take
this side street right here.

I'll tell you why.
If you look to your left,

I believe Arnold Schwarzenegger
owns the entire block.

-[driver laughs]
-Man: Yeah, he can afford it.

Oh, man, oh.

And right here is the home
of Amanda Clark, everybody.

Probably the finest
young actress around.

She's completed ten films
in the past six years

and is rumored to be doing
her next film with Brad Pitt.

A thriller.

She's quite an actress.

Now, coming up
right here on your right

is a church where
so many celebrities get married.

In fact,
the church is so popular

that they keep coming back
to do it again and again...

and again.

They can't stop doing it.

That's a joke
about how many times
celebrities get married.

All right.

[church organ playing]

My dear friends.

You have come together
in this church...

for richer or for poorer,

preferably richer,

in sickness and in health,

from this day forward,

for as long as you both
shall live and rock on.

Bride:
Eh... that depends.

Y-You're supposed
to say "I do."

Bride: Hey, I know
what I'm supposed to say.

And what I'm saying is,
it depends.

Okay. Eh, it depends?

Bride: Yeah. On what you plan
on doing with the rest
of your life.

Come on, you can't go on
being just a tour guide.

I wanna be
with someone successful,

a lawyer, a CEO.

Or a doctor.

I didn't go to college.

-[woman gasps]
-What?!

-Bride: You didn't
go to college?
-No.

Bride: Everybody who's anybody
goes to college.

I mean, really, that is
the least you could have done.

Now... hold on, I thought
that we were in love.

-Bride: Oh, please!
-[blows raspberry]

Bride: Don't hand me
that emotional crap.

No. I want bucks.

Big bucks.

Come on, there's more to life
than just money.

-Bull!
-Bride: Like what?

-Like--
-Bride: And don't give me
that love stuff.

All right, all right,
what about movies?

-Bride: [scoffs] Movies?
-Yeah, what about movies?

-Yeah, movies.
-Bride: Movies?

-Yeah, I love--
-All you know about is movies?

No, I know about,
I know about--

Bride: Oh, pally, here,
you gotta forget this.

I am just so outta your league.

["Bridal Chorus" playing]

You see, darling, you should
have listened to your mother.

You should have married
your gynecologist.

Don't look at me, pal.
I get paid either way.

What?

-What?
-Can we go now?

Oh. Okay, here we go.
We're moving on.

We're gonna move on.

Whoo!

[falsetto]
That concludes another tour

of the rich and infamous.
Thank you very much.

[normal voice]
Seriously, you guys, thank you
for choosing Trolleywood Tours.

See you later, ma'am.
Enjoy your trip here.

[southern accent]
Y'all come back now, hear?

[normal voice]
Thank you. Enjoy your stay.

Excuse me.
I'm sorry to bother you.

We were wondering
if you knew any place

that we could, like,
go and see a movie star.

Yeah. They're
all over the place,

but there are a couple places,
but they're pretty pricey,

but I know
you can see some folks.

That's fine, we're from
Wisconsin and we're splurging.

Ah, there you go, okay.

Well, my friend Danny
is a bartender

-at a place called Mandalay...
-Mm-hmm.

Right down
Hollywood Boulevard, left,

and it's right there on Melrose.

-Okay, good.
-Great.

-Thank you.
-Thank you so much.

-Maybe we'll see you there.
-Maybe. See you later.

-Bye. Thanks!
-Good luck.

Hey. Subway construction's
still going on.

Cahuenga's a mess.

[traffic report on radio]

What's going on?

I was on the phone ten days ago

and they told me emphatically
I had a 90-day extension.

They are just a bunch
of lying bastards.

Those bastards at the bank are
trying to close us down, Harold.

Dad, you wanted
the new trolley and you
know about these payments.

You know what we need?

We need a lawyer
and we need a payment plan.

What lawyer? Lawyer, my ass.

What we oughta get is a gun
for them lying.

-Wow, pow! Dead banker!
-You know what?

-I don't have it.
-We need to get
some food in you

-'cause you shouldn't
kill on an empty stomach.
-I just don't have it.

I don't know where
I'm gonna get the money.
This is stupid.

-Come on.
-Oh...

You all right?

He told me I could have
this extension.

I swear on my mother.

-What about the tape deck?
-Harold: Tape deck's
broken, Dad.

Dad: Well, what were you
doing about it?

Harold: Well, I'm telling
stories, I'm having fun,
you know.

Dad: Oh, hey, I almost forgot,
happy birthday.

Harold: Thank you.
It was the other day.

Dad: No, it's...
No, it's the 11th, March 11th.

Harold: No. March 7th,
my birthday.

-You are-- I am so sorry.
-That's all right.

-I always get
those two mixed up.
-Don't worry about it.

-What are you, 28?
No, you're 29, right?
-30, Dad.

-30?
-30 years old.

-30? You mean you're 30...
-30.

...and you don't even
have a girlfriend yet?

What's that about?

What it is, is you gotta
get out more,

get drunk, get laid,
do something.

It's all those
damn movies you watch.

Yeah, sure, Dad.

You're like your mother was,
God bless her, a dreamer.

-Yeah.
-You do still like girls,
don't ya?

Yeah, I like 'em a lot, Dad.

So, what is the big deal?

Well... [gasping]

I think a lot of girls
in this town...

they care more about,
like, what car you drive

and where you live
than who you are, and...

I gotta find a woman
who loves me for who I am.

That's it. [straining]

That's all you want?
No tits, no...?

No, yeah, it would be great
if she was attractive, but...

Hey, nothing
is impossible, Harold.

I married your mother, right?

30? 30, wow.

Yeah.

If only you had my looks.

So, what, you got about
six weeks on this cast, Dad?

I'll be happy when you get
this thing off.

You'llbe happy?

I miss the track.
Everything itches.

♪ It's a funny kind
of feeling... ♪

-Hi, can I help you?
-Yeah, my buddy Danny's
actually right there.

Okay.

♪ Dripping from the ceiling ♪

♪ Naked on the floor... ♪

My God.
Never thought I'd see you here.

-What is it, your birthday?
-I met a couple girls
in the trolley.

I thought maybe they'd be here.

-You, looking for girls?
-Yes.

[scoffs] Next thing I know,
you'll be drinking, smoking,
moussing your hair.

Well, you know, I gotta
start somewhere, right?

I'm glad to hear it, man.
Glad to hear it.

You know, I was gonna
call you anyway.

-What's up?
-I got a part in a play.

-No!
-Yeah.

-That's great.
-Eh, it doesn't pay anything.

-It's good exposure.
-Yeah?

Yeah. Half the time
I've got my clothes on.

Hey. The kids
will love that, right?

-[both laugh]
-Woman: Danny.

-Come here.
-Come over here.

-Come on.
-Come here!

-Come on.
-Play with us!

That's my fan club.

-That's very, very nice for you.
-Yeah.

-Woman 1: Hey, baby.
-Woman 2: Danny, come on.

Just one little minute.

Oh, you are such a man.
Get over here.

-[women giggling]
-Ooh, look at that.

They know things I don't.

[snickers] You know,
if I tell them that
you're a producer,

I probably could fix you up.

I will beg you not to do that.
Dude, seriously.

-All right, man,
what'll you have?
-Both: Coke.

-Yeah. Actually,
make it a double.
-On the rocks?

-Ice spoils the drink.
-...the drink.

-You got it.
I'll be right back.
-Thanks, man.

No. No way.
Absolutely not.

Tell him he's always been
a cheapskate,
and you can quote me...

[sighs]
Can you believe this place?

I have to go outside to make
a goddamn phone call.

Nothing but static.

[exhales sharply]

-All right, where were we?
-I was trying to tell you why
I shouldn't do this role,

not the way
the script reads now.

[scoffs] We're about
to sign the contracts.

Look, your last picture
grossed 30 mil.

We're about to break you out.

This is the picture
that will do it.

I don't understand,
I practically gave them my word.

I know that, Sidney,
I'm sorry, but...

the script needs
to be rewritten.

I mean, it's...
it's really awful.

It's got a few problems,

but you gotta admit,
it's a great story.

I'll admit it's a good idea.

So, what do you want?

We got the best writer
in the business.

-The man is a genius.
-Maybe.

But he obviously
does not like women.

Samuel T. Lewis
does not like women?

Are you kidding?
He loves women.

He's schtupped
every secretary and starlet

from Beverly Hills to Malibu.

As a matter of fact,
I think I...

Yeah, well,
that's another story.

Sid, I didn't say
he doesn't sleep with women,

I said he doesn't like them.

[sighs] Look, Mandy.

We know men are pigs,
especially writers,

but look where we are.

We're in Hollywood.

We're not gonna turn this
into some kind of a crusade,

-are we?
-No. We're not.

Sid, I just want the role
to be more real.

Thank you.

I mean, did you ever see
All About Eve?

It's like Anne Baxter's
character,

she seems so innocent
and charming,

but what she really wants

is Bette Davis's role
in the play.

All About Eve,I thoughtPaul Newman's wife was in that.

No, no, no,
that's Three Faces of Eve.

Oh, well, whatever.

Okay, let's get more specific.
I'll show you.

I'll show you
some stuff in here.

-I mean, some of it's
even kind of funny.
-[phone rings]

Oh, hang on.

-Oh, Sid.
-Sid Stone, what's up?

Damn it, you're breaking up.
[sighs]

Can you believe this place?
I might as well be on the moon.
I'll be right back.

Sid, how can we talk
about this if you keep
taking the phone calls?

Last one, last one, I promise.
It's Spielberg.

[mouthing words]

Sidney:
Steven.

Steve...

Steven? [scoffs]

Jimmy, I gotta use
your office phone.

Oh, God.

[sighs]

So, what do you do?

I'm a writer, a screen writer.

Oh, that's interesting.

So am I.

So, who's your agent?

Arthur Blake at CCI.

Oh.

You must be doing very well.

Mm-hmm.

Hmm.

Woman: So, uh,
where can I see your work?

Man:
Where? Or when?

Woman:
Oh, that's right.

-Did you see who's here?
-Hm-mmm.

She's so fine.

Oh, my.

In the corner booth.

-Who are you talking about?
-Amanda Clark.

[Bennett Cale playing
"Round and Round"]

♪ The first time I saw you ♪

♪ Did you see my head going
round and round and round? ♪

-Did you see that?
-What?

-She was looking at me.
-Oh, stop the madness.

-She looked at me just now.
Gimme your pen.
-Why?

Gimme your pen,
I wanna get her autograph.

Come on, man, this ain't
that kind of place, Harold.

-They come here to get away
from that, man.
-You're right.

You're right about that.
What am I thinking?

-I'm gonna go say hi to her.
-Cool.

But, whatever you do,
don't tell her you're
a tour bus driver,

they hate you guys.

I forgot about that.
Forget about it,
I'm kidding myself.

Oh, nah, go on, now.
Go ahead.

Now, you'll never forgive
yourself if you don't.

Go ahead.
Just be smooth.

You can do it, go ahead.

♪ I watch your mouth moving ♪

♪ Around and round and round ♪

♪ And round and round ♪

♪ Oh, no
don't put my head down ♪

♪ Put my head down ♪

♪ No, don't you put
my head down... ♪

I'm Harold McMurphy.
I'm a big...

-[coughing]
-...fan.

Sorry. Sorry about that.

-Sorry.
-Hmm...

That's okay.

Uh... thank you.

Yeah. Thank me for what?

Oh, for being my fan?

Oh, you kidding? I...
It's the easiest thing.

I've seen every movie
you've ever made.

-You have?
-Yeah.

Yeah. Uh, the last one
with Stallone.

Uh, I only saw it twice.
Not a big fan of that one.

But... but, um,
Sunset Cafewas...

it's such amazing work.

And the last scene
when your heart was broken,

you were doomed,
everyone knew it,

and then you let out that,
that nervous laugh.

It was... it was...

it was the best stuff
I've ever seen on film.

Thank you.

[stammering]
You're gonna think I'm insane,

but you reminded me
of Montgomery Clift

in A Place in the Sun.

Not that you remind me of a man.
You're not.

-You couldn't be
more of a woman.
-[giggles]

And, I, you know...
I'm still talking.

-[Amanda laughs]
-God, uh...

But--But it was like you
in a Vivien Leigh thing.

It was like a combo,
you had that vulnerability,

like that--that she had in, um, Streetcar Named Desire.

Wow. That's very
perceptive of you.

I actually based
my character on Blanche.

-Really?
-Yeah.

Harold:
That's amazing.

Yeah, you must know
a lot about film.

Yeah, well, it goes
along with my job.

-Really? So what do you do?
-Yeah.

Do?

Amanda: I mean, what do you
do for a living?

I, uh...

I go around and, you know,
I tell stories.

Oh.

So you're a writer?

Something like that, yeah.
Yeah.

So, who's your agent?

-I'm sorry. Who's... my agent?
-Amanda: Your agent.

I'm not gonna call you,
you have to call me.

My agent is Arthur Blake
at, uh, CCI.

-Really?
-Yeah.

Wow, you must be doing
very well.

I think I met him one time.
Is he a real tall man,
good looking?

Uh, yeah. That's probably him.

That's...

Um, I... You just do great work,

and I just wanted to thank you,

and I'm never the guy that
does this, but I'm gonna go.

You know what,
can I ask you something?

Um, would you mind just sitting
here with me for a little while?

I... It's stupid, I feel
kind of self-conscious

sitting here by myself.

Sit down...?

I mean, unless
you're in a hurry.

No. Uh, I thought, uh...
I thought your friend
was sitting here.

-I saw the woman...
-Oh, who, Sidney?

Sidney's not my friend,
she's my agent.

We're sitting here,
we're supposed to be talking
about this screenplay,

and she keeps running
and using the phone, so...

Oh. Uh, I'd love
to sit down with you.

Amanda:
Great.

Thanks a lot.

-Harold: Okay.
-[Amanda giggles]

So you said your name's
Harold, right?

-Yeah, yeah.
-Harold.

Harold, I have
a proposition for you.

A proposition?

Yeah.

Well...

You must be a good writer

because otherwise
you wouldn't be with CCI,

and you obviously know
a lot about film, and...

See, I have this screenplay
and it's got some problems,

and, um, I was just wondering
if maybe you wouldn't mind

reading it for me and telling me
what you think.

I know, you probably think
I've got a lot of nerve

asking somebody
I don't even know,

and I'm sure you get asked
to do this all the time.

It's just that I feel
kind of pressed and...

I... I really need somebody
who'll give me an honest answer.

And, I mean, it seems
like fate, you know,

you being here
and you being a writer

and I need a writer and...
[laughs]

Look, if you don't want
to do it, I understand.

No. I... I mean,
of course, I would do it.

-I'd love to, I'd be honored.
-Really?

Yeah. Uh...
Is this the thriller

with Brad Pitt?

Yeah. How did you know that?

I... I saw a little spot
on "ET" the other night.

-Really?
-Mm-hmm.

So you really wouldn't
mind reading it for me?

[laughing]
I'd appreciate it so much.

No, no, I would be

I would, I would,
I'd be honored.

That's great, that's great.

Um... Well, maybe we
could meet tomorrow,

say four o'clock
at the Beachside Cafe,

and talk about it?

Uh, tomorrow at four o'clock?

Is that possible?

No, that's, uh, I think

I can fit that in my schedule.

Okay, great.

Then it's a date.

I mean, you know. [laughs]

Okay. So I'll see you then.

-Hi.
-Harold: All right.

-Amanda: So I'll see you
tomorrow.
-Yeah.

Oh, wait, don't forget this.

Oh, I was gonna walk out.

-Sidney: Talk to you.
-All right.

Amanda:
Thank you.

Who the hell was that?

Oh, that was Harold McMurphy,
the writer.

Oh, yeah, I like his stuff.

[siren wailing]

Dude, what happened, man?

I got a date.

-You and Amanda Clark?
-Yes.

-I lied, though.
-Yeah, I know you lied.

But what did you say?

I don't know.

I just... I'm...

think I'm gonna be sick.

Okay, but write that down,
because whatever you said,

I'll use it, man, I sw...

Damn. Harold hooked up
with Aman...

I can't believe that.
I cannot believe it.

Harold: I don't even get
what you're saying, Dad.

I'm saying, this might
be a good time

for you to see
my astrologer friend.

You know, just to see
how things work out.

-Who, Lulu? Maybe.
-She's a psychic, too.

I told her all about you.

She's about your age, divorced,

and, check this out,

extremely interesting
to look at,

if you get my drift.

I think I do, Dad.

Yeah. She might be nice
to have around.

Huh.

Hmm. She'd always know
what we wanted to eat.

[laughs, coughs]

Get it?

-Hey, hey, anybody home?
-Harold: Hey, Danny.

Harold's Dad:
Hey, Danny, let yourself in.

I know you'll forgive me
if I don't get up.

From what I heard,
you haven't been up in a while.

Oh, that's cute, Dan.

What are you doing?

Please, I got two minutes,
man, please.

Yeah, I know,
and you're wearing that?

-Yeah.
-Hey, hey, leave him alone.
He looks great.

It's not like she's interested
in him personally.

-Come on, she's just looking
for some cheap advice.
-Maybe, maybe not

How do you know
what she has in my mind,
big Rip Van Cripple?

Maybe what she really wants
is to seduce him.

[father coughs]

-Take off that shirt.
-Danny, come on.

Maybe that's what
her plan was all along.

Come on, man,
women are not like men.

They're unpredictable.

Yeah, like your career.
[laughs]

Oh, that hurts. That--

-Take off that ugly shirt.
-Why? What are you
talking about?

It says "loser, loser, loser."
Take it off, man.

-Why?
-You're gonna wear mine.

-What are you talking about?
-I'm telling you, man.

These are the threads I got
off my last modeling gig.

-Women love this stuff.
-Oh, come on, she already
thinks I'm a writer.

Now she's gonna
think I'm a writer
with really nice clothes?

Hey, it's a dog eat dog
world out there.

With a knickknack
paddywack, she might just
be looking for a bone.

I wanna see you in this,
though.

-I don't think so.
I can't, no, no.
-This here.

-I got a good place
for this, though.
-Enjoy.

Salvation Army.
Boys Club.

Where'd you get this, man?

I can't wait
to see you in that.

You will be
the original Urkel.

Hey, Urkel gets
some fine women, you know?

Let me just put this on.

-[rock music playing]
-Check it out.

Harold:
Which way?

How you doing?
Listen, do me a huge favor.

Park this as far away
from the cafe as possible, okay?

Yeah, like Cleveland.
Thanks, man.

So, you're sure
you don't wanna stay?

We're just gonna be
talking about the script.

Thanks, sweetie, but I'm
kind of busy, you know?

Got a lot of catching up to do.

Amanda:
Kind of busy.

Rich:
I gotta check out
the new Jag today.

I got a massage
in the afternoon.

Got a lot of errands to run,
you know how it is.

Amanda:
Okay.

Rich:
But I'll miss you, though.

[clears throat]

-Hey, how are you?
-Doing well, thank you.

Good. It's good to see you.
You look great.

-That's a great outfit.
-Oh, thank you.

It's not mine. The whole
outfit's my friend Danny's.

Really? So, what did he do,
outgrow it?

No, he, uh,
didn't have time to.

[Amanda laughs]

It's very "GQ."

Oh, I'm sorry. Rich Adams,
this is Harold McMurphy.

Harold, this is Rich Adams.

Nice-- Nice to meet you, Rich.

Yeah. You know what?
I guess I better get going.

-Okay.
-Rich: Okay?

-You wanna stop by later?
-I don't know.

You know, I gotta get up
real early in the morning,

I'm gonna play tennis
with Pierce tomorrow.

You know how it is.
But I'll give you a call.

-Okay.
-Okay, baby?

-Okay.
-Yeah?

Okay. Bye.

-Nice meeting you.
-Right on.

-So, how you doing?
-I'm doing...

I'm doing all right.
How are youdoing?

I'm good. Thank you
so much for coming.

Oh, thank you
for inviting me.

-Yeah, my father's
a fan of Richard's.
-Really?

Likes his show, even more
than Baywatch Nights.

-Wow.
-Yeah.

Did I interrupt you guys?

No, not at all. I mean...

I was waiting here for you.

So, can I get you
something to drink?

-Yeah, I'd love a Coke,
would be great.
-Coke? Okay.

Can we...?

...I wanted to know what
happened, I cared, you know?

-Yeah.
-Definitely.

-Wow.
-Yeah.

So, what you're saying is,

you really think
it's not that bad?

No, I mean, as...
as it is right here,

it's solid, you know?

[groans] I don't know.

I mean, I guess...
I guess I think so, too.

It's sad without being
melodramatic.

-Definitely, definitely.
-And that's probably

the best part about it,
don't you think?

Yeah. Uh, good supporting
characters, you know,

and then an uplifting feeling
at the end, you know?

It's like life-affirming.

Yeah, it makes you care.
I mean, you really care

about the characters,
that makes it work.

Definitely, definitely.

Um... um...
How are we doing?

[giggles] I think that
I'm still not convinced.

-No?
-No.

I don't know if I am, either.

-Oh, God.
-I don't...

Okay, more wine.
That will help.

No, no, no, no, no.
Two glasses,
I turn into an animal.

-Oh, really?
-Yes, I...

start looking for caves and...

I need to hibernate
for the winter, it's very ugly.

-I snore like a spider monkey.
-[Amanda laughs]

Very ugly.

Spider monkey?

Yeah.

You know what, Harold,
I really appreciate
everything you've done.

-Oh, man.
-I just...
I just think I should...

just do it the way it is
and...

I wish I could have been
more help.

No. You've been
lots of help, really.

You know, I couldn't help
but think...

while I was reading it...

Nah.

-What?
-No, it's something
I was thinking,

and it's not even...
it's not even worth telling you.

-No, please.
-It's...

You know the movie
All About Eve?

Yes, I do.

-This ain't it.
-[laughing]

No, no, that's not why
I brought it up.

Anne Baxter's character,
right?

If your role was more like that
in the beginning,

you know, a complete innocent,
and then made that turn,

and just doing whatever it took,
you know,

to get Bette Davis's role,
that pit bull kind of a thing,

it would lift the entire script

and it would definitely
be worth doing,

and it's not here.

She's one-dimensional,
you know,

and, uh, I got this feeling,

and you're gonna think
I'm crazy,

but I... I don't know
if this guy likes women,

-the writer.
-Oh, my God, that's amazing.

-Why?
-That is exactly
what I said to my agent.

-Really?
-I swear, that is...

Harold, that is exactly
what I said to my ag--

She didn't listen to me.
She thought I was,
you know, crazy.

Hey, you know what,
I have an idea.

-What?
-We're gonna go find Sidney,

my agent, and we're gonna talk
to her about this,
you're gonna tell her

-what you just told me.
-Oh, no, no, I don't think
that would be appropriate.

-No, it would be.
-Because, you know what,
I probably,

I don't think I'd even...
Who knows

-Harold.
-I probably am wrong about this.

Please do this, I just want you
to tell her your opinion.

It's so close to mine,
and she would...

She'll-- I think she'll listen.
I mean, you're a good writer,

and... come on, we'll go.

-I can-- I have money.
-Do you mind?

No, no, no, it's okay.
You're my guest, please.

Please, Harold.
Please do this for me.

-Okay.
-Okay. Let's go.

Let's get outta here.

Okay, so your car or mine?

Oh, your car would be great.
I took the bus.

You took the bus?
Why did you take the bus?

Well, because, you know,
no one takes the bus anymore,

and it's a great way
to see the town.

Okay.

-It'll be fun.
-Okay.

I can't wait to tell her.
[shrieks]

Ha ha.

♪♪

♪ I need a place
where I can be ♪

♪ When the world
is tumbling down on me ♪

♪ Pretty little place
where I can hide ♪

♪ And gather up my thoughts ♪

♪ And just amble in ♪

♪ Oh... ♪

-Good evening, Ms. Clark.
-Good evening.

Do you happen to know
Sidney Stone?

Let's see.
Green Lexus LS400
with a cell phone?

-Exactly.
-Yes. Been here about an hour.

Okay, great. Thanks.

Do you know Arthur Blake?

Red Porsche Cabriolet 911?

-I don't know.
-What's he look like?

-Not sure.
-What's he do?

-He's supposed to be my agent.
-Uh-huh.

-What, your secret agent?
-No, he...

-Hi.
-Hi.

-Come on.
-Okay.

-Let's go.
-All right.

[jazz piano playing,
crowd murmuring]

[stammering]
I... We shouldn't...

Oh, it'll be quick.
Come on.

Woman:
Is that Amanda Clark?

-Woman 1: Amanda?
-Woman 2: She's busy.

-Woman 3: Who is that?
-Woman 4: That's Amanda Clark.

It's so creepy, isn't it,
hearing your name like that?

-Yeah, that's why
I never go out.
-Yeah.

-I don't go out for dinner.
-Amanda!

Darling! I'm so happy
you could make it.

Mwah, mwah!

If I'd known you were coming,

I would have sent you
an invitation.

Listen, I still want
you and Tom in my next movie,

and I'm not gonna give up,
I'm just gonna be like
a dog with a bone.

-Hello.
-Hello.

-Emma. Emma Jeffreys.
-Hi, Emma.

This is Harold McMurphy.
He's a writer.

Oh. Oh, yes! My god.

I'm so insanely happy
to meet you.

I love, love, love your work.

-Thank you, thank you very much.
-You're welcome very much.

-Look at this place,
it's wonderful.
-Well, thank you, yes.

-This is sort of the Parthenon.
-Yes, and...

-Graceland.
-Vegas.

And the White House.

[all laughing]

-Wonderful, though.
-Oh, you're charming.

Actually, we're looking
for Sidney Stone.

Have you seen her?

Sidney Stone?

Last time I saw Sidney,

she was in the pool room
on the phone.

-Of course.
-Where-where else?

Okay. Well, thank you.
We're sort of in a hurry.

We need to speak to her
about something important.

-I hope you'll excuse us.
-Oh, well, all right.

-Okay.
-All right, then.

-Thank you for having us.
-My pleasure.

-Okay.
-Yes.

Thursday lunch
would be best for me.

Harold:
All right, I'll get back to you.

[jazz orchestra playing]

Let me make it easy
for you, just say yes.

Make the snake sound, "yessss."

[door opens]

Amanda just walked in.
I'll have to get back to you.

Arnold, I'll call you
right back.

Look at you. I have never
seen you out at night.

Are you all right?
Is your house on fire?

Everything's fine.
Sidney, I want you
to meet a friend of mine.

-This is Harold McMurphy.
-Hi.

Amanda says you're a writer.

Yes. I... Appears so.

What are you working on?
Do you have a deal?

Uh, no, I don't. I...

Nothing I could...
can't really...

shouldn't talk about it,
actually.

You know how writers are.

I know,
that's why I handle actors.

Amanda:
So, Harold read
the Lewis script.

-Already?
-Yeah.

Amanda: Yes, he did,
and he saw something

that I think
you might have missed.

Right. And what might that be?

Uh... well, I...

Well, I just, I felt that
the writer,

you know, I felt that
he doesn't like women.

That...

-Oh, really?
-Yeah.

I wonder where he would
get an idea like that.

Well, actually,
just from the script,

from reading the script.

I just, you know, I felt
that he should infuse

some of the integrity
he uses with the male characters

into the female characters.

-Mm-hmm.
-Exactly.

You see, I'm not
the only one, Sid.

Well, that's just great.

Sounds like the two of you
have a lot in common.

Sid, I want a meeting
with the studio tomorrow.

Will you excuse us
for a moment?

-Certainly.
-Could we talk?

Amanda...

honey, what's happening to you?

Who was it who discovered you
in your high school play?

Sidney Stone.

Who got you your first movie?
Sidney Stone.

And who stuck her ass out to
get you this Brad Pitt film?

Me. Sidney Stone.

And now you're telling me
that this, this hack

-knows best?
-Shhhh.

Sidney:
Who is he?

I have wracked my brain,
I have never heard of him.

And now you want a meeting
at the studio

over some no-name?

Yes, I do. Thank you.

Mwah! I'll see you tomorrow.

[sighs]

Amanda:
Love you, Sid.

Harold, I'm sorry
she was so rude.

That's all right,
it's not your fault.

I shouldn't have
dragged you out here.

What does she do
for you, again?

[sighs] Justin.

[sighs]

I sense a mini-series
in your future.

So, you wanna stay and party?

Uh, no, I actually don't.

-Rich: Have we met?
-Woman: I don't think so.

Rich:
I'm Rich.

Woman:
I'm Tiffany.

This is a beautiful suit.

Rich: Listen, why don't we
go for a little walk, and...

Oh, excuse me. Really nice.

Who was that?

It's my cousin.
You know what, give me a minute.

-I'll be back in a minute.
-Emma: Harold, I'm gonna
steal you,

I'm not gonna give you back.
Have you ever thought
about directing?

-I haven't
-Listen to this.

You, Tom Cruise, and Amanda
triple threat.

-Okay.
-Listen, by the way.

-Are you seeing anyone?
-Excu... Excuse me.

Harold. Harold, hi.
Joey Ace.

-Hey, Joe.
-How are you?
I've got a project

I'm working on, I think it's
absolutely perfect for you.

Give me 30 seconds.
Tom Arnold...

-Tom Arnold.
Broken-down rodeo clown.
-Broken-down rodeo clown.

-Losing his job to Rhea Perlman.
-Everybody wins, everybody wins.

Let's do lunch.

Joey Ace, love your work.

Can you get my car, please?

Rich:
Amanda...

Amanda.

Just leave me alone, okay?

Calm down,
it's not what you think.

It's exactly what I think.
You lied to me.

When did I lie to you?

Oh, come on, I thought
we trusted each other.

-Yeah, so did I.
-And I thought
that you understood

that sometimes I need to be seen
with other people,

I mean, for publicity.

It's just for business.
Come on, I thought we had
an agreement.

What agreement?
You only agree
with yourself, Rich.

-Gimme a break.
-Oh, oh, give you a break.

-I see. So it's okay for you...
-Yeah.

...to go to a party with some
jerk, but it's not okay for me.

Hey, Harold McMurphy
is not a jerk, okay?

-Yes, he is.
-The only reason
we came to this house

was to see Sidney, that's it.

-Come on.
-You know what, bud?
If you know what's good for you,

-you'll stay out of this.
-Be careful, I take vitamins.

Rich:
You...

I'm driving.
That's what I do best.

You know what?
I'll call you.

Okay? I'll call you.

Rich:
Jerk.

He's a jerk.

♪ Open your eyes ♪

♪ If you wanna start a fire ♪

♪ Turn out the lights ♪

♪ Let me take you higher ♪

♪ Girl ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

[Amanda sighs]

I'm sorry for acting like
such a school girl back there.

-It was...
-Here, blow your nose.

You'll feel better.

I don't wanna ruin
your handkerchief.

No, no, I'll be completely
offended if you don't.

It... came with the jacket.

None of it's mine.

-Thanks.
-Sure.

You know, Jimmy Stewart
lived across the street

when he was shooting
It's a Wonderful Life?

Did he, really?

Yeah.

Oh, I loved that movie.

I mean, I...

Every Christmas, I watch
that movie when it comes on.

Oh, me too.
First time I saw it,

my father let me stay up late,
and as I was watching it,

the sun came up,
and it was a white Christmas

'cause we were back east

and it was a perfect way
to see it.

I'll never forget that.

It was great.

I really wanted to thank you
for taking care of that...

situation back there.

I mean, it's like...
And for taking vitamins.

-Oh, God.
-[laughs]

What did I say?

It was a psychotic diversion,
you know?

They say when someone tries
to rob you

that you immediately ask them
what time it is.

They don't know what to do.
He didn't know what to do.

-It worked.
-Yeah, it did somehow, it did.

Um...

thanks for tonight.

It was really nice
hanging out with you.

I'm... I'm gonna get outta here.

Uh, I gotta...
it's getting late.

Thank you.

You wanna, you wanna come in

and get some hot chocolate
or something?

With some marshmallows?

-Hmm...
-S'mores?

-Okay.
-Campfire?

-I think we can--
-Cross-legged, ghost stories?

-You really want me to come in?
-You're funny.

You always make me laugh.
Yeah. That'd be nice.

Come on in.

I'd love to.

-Great.
-Come on.

Your mom's like
Gypsy Cher woman, isn't she?

She is.

Look at like
the eyelashes and stuff.

She's beautiful.

Look at that wig.

What's up with that?

It's Halloween.
What am I?

I don't know,
you're a cutie, though.

You got the blue
eye shadow going.

I'm surprised you don't have
the puka shells, though.

You know? I had them
stapled to my neck.

There you go.

You knew you had it going on,
though, right there,

those little blue eyes.

Beautiful.
You always had them, huh?

Well, sometimes they look blue,

sometimes they look green
or gray.

Look. It's just, it depends
on what I'm wearing,

what the colors are
they reflect.

Kind of like, uh...
like a mood ring, right?

-Exactly.
-Yeah?

Harold: Oh, my God,
you look different.

[both laughing]

-Harold: Wait, that's you
right there?
-Amanda: That's me.

This is a birthday party?

Where are the little kids?

Uh, yeah...
that's a weird story.

Um, okay, we just moved here
from Atlanta.

That was my birthday and...

my mom wanted me to have
this birthday party,

but I hadn't really made
any friends yet,

so she said, "That's okay,

"just take these invitations
to school and pass them out,

and the kids will show up."

Everyone loves
a birthday party, right?

-Harold: Yeah.
-Amanda: So I did it,

and the day of the party comes
and no one shows up.

Not one person.

I'd have been there.

What are these?
These are recent, huh?

Oh, yeah, God, I didn't
know those were in there.

You and Rich.

Yeah.

[sighs]

You all right with that?

I'm sure everything's
gonna work out with you guys.

-Right?
-No, no, no, no.

It won't work out.

I've known about this
for a while.

I just, I didn't
wanna believe it.

-Yeah.
-Yeah.

I'm gonna tell him it's over.

Really? That's what you want?

Yeah, that's what I want.

What does he want?

I don't care what he wants.

I mean, this isn't
the first time it's happened.

Huh.

If I'm gonna have
a relationship,

I want it to be with someone
that I can trust,

and someone that will always
tell me the truth.

It's important.

Don't you think?

I got something to tell you.

-What's that?
-[sighs]

I had a really nice time.

And, uh, I've got to go.

-[laughs] Okay.
-And I need my coat.

-Okay.
-That's what I wanted to...

Thank you.

So, you sure you don't
need a ride home?

No. No, I'm gonna walk.

My friend Danny lives
not too far from here

-and I've gotta give him
his clothes back.
-Okay.

Yeah.

So... I was thinking that...

maybe you and I could,
you know, we could go out.

I mean, not "go out go out,"
but that we could, um...

you know, we could talk about
the script some more and stuff,

'cause I could, um, get some...

It's not a good idea.

It's probably a bad idea.

-Harold.
-You know...

I'd love to go out with you.

-You would?
-Yeah.

-When?
-Uh... tomorrow.

[both laugh]

-That would be great.
I'd love that.
-Okay.

-Seven o'clock.
-Great.

-Seven o'clock.
-Seven o'clock.

I'll see you tomorrow night
at seven o'clock.

-Okay.
-Okay.

See you later.

Okay. Bye.

-Hey, you sure you don't
need a ride?
-No, no, no, I need air.

I'm gonna get so much air,
I'm gonna hover.

I'm a hovercraft.

♪♪

♪ Driving down
the whirly road ♪

♪ Crossing every lane ♪

♪ I've got no time
to wonder why... ♪

Dustin, Dustin, she is dying
to do the movie with you.

But her schedule is impossible.

So fix it, honey, fix it.

Ciao.

Rich Adams.
Can I get you anything?

Drink? Cigarettes?

Listen, Sidney...

Amanda and I, last night
we had a fight at the party.

So everybody heard.
Go talk to her.

That doesn't work,
try jewelry.

It's not that simple.
I mean...

I know this sounds unbelievable,

but I think she's seeing
another guy.

Some jerk I saw her with
at the party last night.

Uh, what's his name?
It starts with an M.

McMillan, McMurray,
something like that.

-McMurphy. Harold McMurphy.
-Yeah, McMurphy.

Harold McSmurfy.
What do you know about him?

Well, he's a pain in my ass,

but you don't need
to be stressed out
about a guy like Harold.

There is no way--
sorry, honey,

she could ever be serious
about a goofball like that.

♪ Do what you do ♪

♪ Say what you wanna say ♪

♪ I'm scanning my calls ♪

♪ 'Cause it's Sunday
and I'm lazy ♪

♪ I heard it all
I know it's bull ♪

♪ The bed is where
I do my jazz ♪

♪ Do what you do ♪

♪ And say what you wanna say ♪

♪ Don't have to talk so much ♪

♪ I hear what
you're saying now ♪

♪ Know what you're
talking about ♪

♪ I hear what you're saying ♪

♪ Do what you do ♪

♪ I'll be the one for you ♪

♪ I look in my fish tank ♪

♪ Wishing warily ♪

♪ And my TV's on,
I'm smoking butts ♪

♪ My machine does
the work I need ♪

♪ "Just leave a message" ♪

♪ "And I'll call you
when I'm free" ♪

♪ Don't have to talk
so much ♪

♪ I hear what
you're saying now ♪

♪ Know what
you're talking about ♪

♪ I hear what
you're saying ♪

♪ So you think I'm a prick ♪

♪ I don't care ♪

♪ It's just my fish and me ♪

♪ What do you think? ♪

♪ Tell it to my machine ♪

♪ Standing right there... ♪

My father's just Cucamonga.

[imitating] "I'm a freak in
a freak kingdom, remember that."

-Oh, my God.
-That's how he gets out of it.

Says anything he wants.

Ah, he sounds like
a real character.

He...
More than you will ever know.

Yeah, but that is
amazingly sweet,

you helping him out like that.

It really is.
He's a good man.

Yeah.

[kids shrieking]

So you said you're writing.
How's that going?

Uh... There's nothing...
nothing really to tell.

Come on, don't be so modest.

You must be able
to tell me something.

Well, I'm not writing
anything right now.

-No?
-Nothing.

-You're not?
-No.

Hmm.

In that case,

I have another
proposition for you.

Oh, my God.

Uh-oh. [laughs]

Actually, I was gonna
ask you this before,

but I didn't and...

Um... I was just wondering
if maybe you'd be interested

in doing the re-write
on the screenplay.

-Me do the re-write?
-Yeah. You're
the perfect choice.

Huh. You know what,
I don't think--

Listen, if it's money
you're worried about, don't,

because Sidney will talk
to your agent,

-she'll talk to the studio.
-My agent. You know what?

What if, uh, what if
I'm not what you think I am?

You know what I mean?
What if I can't do it

as well as you deserve it
to be done?

No, but you're a good writer,
obviously,

or you wouldn't have
an agent like Arthur Blake.

Well, what if I can't
do it the way you want?
Do you know what I mean?

You deserve--
You deserve a great rewrite.

Okay, if you can't, you can't,
but I think you can.

I really do.

I mean...

I showed that script
to everybody I know,

and nobody saw what I did
except you.

Really.

Come on, and it won't
even take that long.

You just make
a few changes and...

And you're the only one
I trust to do it, I swear.

Please do it.

Please?

Please?! [whimpering]

You got me. [laughs]

-Yes?
-I will do it.

-Ohhh!
-Ahh.

Hey, buddy. Buddy.
[whistles]

Buddy. You got a cigarette?

-Huh?
-Cigaretto?

-Cigaretto?
-No, I don't smoke.

Can you spare a dollar?
A dollar?

-Please? Thanks.
-Yeah.

You doing all right?

Yeah, yeah.
Thank you, thank you.

Thanks.

-Yeah.
-Good luck.

-Yeah. You going in there?
-Yeah.

Yeah. Best of luck.
Lot of good they did me.

Shit goes for a buck and a half.

Hey, kids.

Look, man, how many times
do I have to tell you?

No hustling in front
of the building.

Yeah, you wouldn't be talking
to me like that if I was still

head of CCI's Motion Picture
Literary Department.

-Yeah, but you're not.
-Used to kiss my ass.

-Right, but you're a bum now.
-Chew 'em up, and spit 'em out.

Okay, so look,
take your Armani suit

and your Lexus
and get outta here, okay?

See ya, Vince.

-Good morning, Laura.
-Laura: Good morning.

Laura, I'm gonna drop these off
and I'll be right out.

Laura:
Yeah, okay.

Hey. Hey!

[phone rings]

Good morning,
Arthur Blake's office.

Mm-hmm.

You're an actor, uh-huh.

You need an agent?
Uh-huh. How unusual.

Yeah. Oh, absolutely.
I'll give him the message.

Uh-huh. What?
Of course I'm writing it down.

Well, I gotta drop these off
at Arthur Blake's.

Any new scripts
have to go through me.

-I gotta pick some stuff
up from there, too.
-You're on the wrong floor.

-He's in the executive suite.
-Executive suite, thanks.

Next time just drop it off
at the receptionist.

You know what I just thought?
I'm glad you called

because you know
what I realized?

We're casting a new film
for Robert Redford,

and I think there's a part
you'd be just perfect for.

Uh-huh, yeah.

What's your number again?

Oh, yeah, mm-hmm.
I'm writing.

Uh-huh. Still writing.

-Uggh!
-[whip tapping]

[hard rock playing]

Can I help you?

Can I help you?

Yeah, I need to talk
to Arthur Blake.

Secretary:
I'm Mr. Blake's assistant.

What would you like
to speak to him about?

Um, I need him to be my agent,
just for a couple weeks.

Yes, I'm sure you do.

But Mr. Blake is not taking
new clients at this time.

Perhaps if you tried
one of the smaller agencies.

No, I need to talk
to him right now.

Well, I'm afraid
that's impossible.

Mr. Blake is out of...

-...town.
-Good morning, Mr. Blake.

-What's he doing down there?
-It's the way he came in.

Uh, Mr. Blake, Mr. Blake.
I need to talk to you right now.

Would you like me
to call security?

Are you dangerous?

No.

All right, who do you know?

Amanda Clark
and Sidney Stone.

Good answer.

You have five minutes.

Harold:
I didn't misrepresent myself.

I was the guy that got the joke,
you know,

and the last thing that she said
was that Sidney Stone

was gonna call this morning.

And that's it.

So, tell me something,

does this kind of thing
happen to you frequently?

Absolutely not, no.
I am an honest...

You know, I'm a normal guy.
I watch a lot of movies.

This is unusual. You know,
if you wrote this down,

I could probably sell it
as a feature. Can you write?

I took a class once and I'm not
a very good speller.

Well, the computers
do that now.

Amanda said that I'd
make a lot of money, and, uh,

you know, I guess either way,
you can't lose.

Yes, but how much could they
possibly give you for a rewrite?

Well, I got the feeling
it's whatever you decide.

Oh.

Well, I don't know.
I mean, I have a reputation.

I mean, how do I know
this is even true?

-[monitor beeps]
-Secretary: Mr. Blake,

would you like to take
a call from Sidney Stone?

Put her on hold.

I've gotta tell you,
I mean, any other agent

would think you were a crackpot
and throw you right out
of the office.

Of course, crackpots
are selling

a lot of million-dollar scripts
these days.

And, uh... I don't know.
There's something about you.

All right! All right.

But now, let me tell ya.
If you wanna write a screenplay,

there are certain things
you have to learn.

Now, there's a bookstore
where you can...

Eh, forget all that.

Do me a favor, go on home
and just write.

Sidney!

♪♪

♪ Well, I'm racing around
in Tinsel Town ♪

♪ And when I'm up
and when I'm down ♪

♪ And my whole world ♪

♪ Is spinning round and round ♪

♪ Keep my head up
in the clouds ♪

♪ My feet on the ground ♪

♪ And just hold me ♪

♪ Never let me go, hold me ♪

♪ In your bejeweled arms ♪

♪ Hold me ♪

♪ Just hold me ♪

♪ Hold me ♪

♪ Never let me go,
hold me... ♪

-[wrestling match on TV]
-Harold's Dad: Hit him! Hit him!

Oh, come on, Ivan! Oh!
Give him the Nelson!

No, not in the ropes!

Oh, this ref is a cheat.

[TV clicks off]

[limping footsteps approaching]

[knock on door]

What are you doing?

Yo-ho.

-Hey.
-You missed...

-What's going on?
-...the greatest match ever.

The Grim Reaper
versus Ivan the Terrible.

Ivan won. No, it was terrific.
It was the best ever.

Beat the Grim Reaper.
Beat Death.

-Yeah.
-That's deep.

-Why didn't you call me?
-You hate wrestling.

-Why are you doing this?
What do you want?
-I got something for you.

[scoffs] What a match!

God, that was good.

That's a large chunk of money.
What is this?

It's the advance
for the rewrite.

I want you to have it, though.

You, you're giving me
this damn check?

Yes, yes, indeed.
Bail the company out.

Your mother
would be proud, Harold.

And I thank you,
I really thank you.

It's terrific.

So you got a deal?

Yeah, yeah, it's why I'm
doing these writing exercises.

Whoa, but we're talking about
a professional screenplay here.

-Yeah, I know.
-You know, for muscles
you do exercises.

For brains,
you gotta go to college.

Well, we didn't have
enough money for brains,

did we, Dad?

So that's why I gotta do this.

And they're paying me
a lot of money,

and I owe it to Amanda
to do a really good job.

-As much as I can.
-You and your mother,
you're always dreamers.

-I...
-But you know what, we never
did anything about it, Dad.

A lot of dreaming.

But this is
a whole other ball game.

Oh.

Hey, now that we've got
everything paid off and all,

we should think about expanding.

-Expanding?
-Yeah.

With you and me both driving,
we could use a second trolley.

It would be like the old days.
Come on, it'll be fun.

No, Dad, what are you--
Pay the bills off.

Don't double down,
that's stupid.

-No, you gotta--
-When you get your cast off,

you go home and I continue on
with my life, okay?

Yeah, but you gotta
think big to be big.

I am thinking big, Dad!
Look at me with this.

I'm stepping up
for the first time in my life
and you can't see that?

Nah, you're just screwy
right now.

It's that girl, ain't it?
It's that movie star,
am I right?

She has something
to do with it, but she sparked
this whole thing for me.

You can't see that?

That's it, Harold.
Look what's going on here.

A dame like that eats
guys like you for breakfast.

-Forget her.
-You know what?

We had a good time and I felt
like a different person.

All right,
and you can't see that?

-You felt like
a different person?
-Yeah.

Well, let me give you
a clue, Harold.

You are not a different person.

You are a tour bus driver
like I am.

You got it?

We show folks
movie stars' homes.

We do not date them.

All right.

-I'm sorry, I sounded rude...
-No...

-Jesus.
-I got an idea.

For forgetting your birthday,
let me give you
a little surprise.

-No, don't worry about it.
-No, I wanna do this.

-It's over, the birthday's over.
-I wanna do this, please.

Just... okay, cook a big dinner
tomorrow night,
let me take care of the rest.

-All right, okay.
-Okay.

I love you, man.

There's a lot more
if you guys want it?

Harold's Dad: Come on, Lulu,
is this great food or what?

The potatoes are real good.

Thank you.

Oh, so as I was saying,

after I read his palm,

I told him that he would
lose weight

and come down
with a horrible disease.

-Eww.
-Six months later,

he's dead.

What happened?

Car hit him.

-[cackling]
-Oh, you!

[both laughing]

I bought it.

Oh, don't let her fool ya.
She is ditzy.

She's got the gift.
She told me...

[wheezing]

She told me I was gonna
get a lot of money.

-Whoo-whoo-whoo-whoo!
-Need I go any further?

[Lulu laughing]

Boy, you're a quiet one,
aren't you?

Still waters run deep.

Nah, he's just gotta get
to know you first, then...

-watch out!
-[shrieks]

Mr. McMurphy,
you are bad, bad, bad!

Acts just like a lady,
don't she, Harold?

Ooh, only when I'm with
such handsome gentlemen.

[giggles]

Oh, you're blushing.

[snickers]

He's blushing. [laughs]

I like a man with humidity.

You're an Aries, aren't you?

No. [clears throat]

-Libra?
-Nope.

Lulu:
Uh...

-Pisces.
-[shrieks]

Pisces! He's a Pisces.

I was just gonna say that.
Pisces.

She's got it,
she has the gift.

Bingo. On the third try.

[Lulu laughing]

You're so funny.

Oh, this looks good.

Huh?

Oh! That's good.
It's so very good. Ohh!

[Lulu giggles]

[snorts]

So... [coughs]...
he'd say...

"If you don't stop shaking
those things in my face,

I'm gonna kick you off
the cheerleading squad."

And then he took my pom poms.

He took your pom poms?

Yeah. [giggles]

Doesn't look it to me.

-Hah!
-[Lulu laughs]

Mr. McMurphy, I think you
like to see me blush.

-[titters]
-Oh, oh...

Harold... help the old man up.

Oh, I've had too much to drink.

-Oh-ho-ho!
-You all right?

Yeah, I'm all right.
I'm fine.

-Lulu, it was terrific.
-Yeah.

-Forever.
-I want you people

to have some good time
to yourself.

-You know I've gotta
wake up early, Dad.
-Hold it...

-Give me a second here.
-Okay.

[inhales, exhales sharply]

Okay, keep everything down
to a low roar.

-We're not gonna be here...
-I gotta get my beauty sleep.

...too long 'cause I gotta
get up, gonna wake up.

[Lulu giggling]

-Good night.
-Good night.

Harold's Dad:
Lulu...

[Lulu giggles]

[light switch clicks]

I like your father.
He's really nice.

Yeah, it's a good act.

[giggles, sighs]

Hope I'm not keeping you up.

-Actually--
-Why don't you let me
read your palm?

I'll do it for free.

I can tell you about
your love life.

I can read the future.

Oh, couldn't be a bigger
fan of the unknown.

Oh, stop it, you are not.
Get over here.

Come on over here
and sit by me.

[laughs]

You're not the sharpest tool
in the shed, are ya?

[laughing]

Come sit by me. Come on,
get your butt over here.

Here he comes,
ladies and gentlemen.

Come on, mister.
All right, then.

[groans] Did you have
any of that wine?

Damn, that was good.

All right, let's see
what we got here.

Ooh. Let me focus.

Ooh, I see.

-Look at that.
-What?

I see you recently met
a woman who you like very much.

-That is true.
-Uh-huh, yes, it is.

Aww, but you're afraid
to tell her

how you really feel,
you see that?

You're afraid that
she might reject you.

Couldn't be more true.
Tell me more.

Well, don't worry,
she won't reject you.

-No?
-Hm-mmm.

She wants you equally.

-That's true?
-Yeah.

-She wants you right now.
-What do you mean?

-Get over here!
-Oh, no, no! Let go!

Lulu: I wanna wake up
naked on your stove.

Harold: Oh, that's not right
for me, Lulu!

-Oh, God.
-Kiss me.

Okay, please, please.

[Lulu giggling]

Harold:
Dad!

-Dad?! That's all right.
-Lulu: Oh, man.

-Harold: That's okay.
-Lulu: Hey, what's that?
Is that for me?

Harold: No, that's not
for you.

Okay, I gotta take you
very far away,

because you're
really not right for me.

[Lulu laughing]

I swear to you,
she tried to rape me.

-Get outta here.
-No, no, no. I'm--

Now, the only reason
I did not call the cops,

and I kid you not, was
because of the sheer terror

of them dusting my crotch
for fingerprints.

Otherwise,
I would have called the cops.

So, wait, what happened?

Did she, like, actually
force you to do it?

No, no, no, no.
Ultimately I ended up

tying her up with a phone cord
to make her stop.

She must have
really hated that.

No, no, she loved it.

I think she thought
it was kinky.

Oh, she sounds
so right for me.

-Not at all.
-Oh, come on, man,
hook me up.

She can't be as freaky
as Norma Desmond.

-Twice as freaky.
-The woman in the movie?

-Thank you.
Enjoy the movie.
-Seriously?

Harold: It almost goes by
too fast, you know?

Danny: [like Norma Desmond]
"Words, words, and more words!"

Harold: That's what they say
art is, man,

when you can make
ten minutes seem like eight.

Style of film-making, man.

The way the writer tells
a story even though he's dead?

-Ahhh.
-See what happens when
you lie to a movie star?

What are you saying,
she's gonna shoot you?

Well, you know what,
I wouldn't blame her if she did.

-Have you called her?
-To say what, you know?

I'm a tour bus driver,
that I'm not a writer?

I don't even know
what to say to her.

No, man, just ask her out.

Tell her you need
to discuss the script.

Forget it, man, no more lies.
I'm not gonna lie to her
no more.

Then tell her the truth,

tell her you just
wanna see her.

-At least it wouldn't be a lie.
-That's right.

And you know, technically,
you are a writer now.

-Why? Because I got paid?
-You got paid.

-That makes you a professional.
-So what? I haven't
written anything.

-That's the reality.
-I got it, I got it.

-What?
-I know just the place
for you to take her.

-Where?
-My play!

-Oh, no.
-Oh, come on, man.
I'll get you in backstage.

It would be horrible.
You'd play the entire
thing to her.

You know? It would be a joke.
You'd be...

-I wouldn't...
-You'd be slammin' 8x10's
right on her feet.

You know what, I will
support you, I'll be there
opening night, I promise you.

All right.

I'm gonna send her flowers.

Well, that's original.

God.

Arthur Blake, please.

[phone rings]

Good morning,
Arthur Blake's office.

Hello, this
is Amanda Clark calling,

and I was hoping you could
help me reach a client
of yours.

I'm looking
for Harold McMurphy?

Harold McMurphy...
Oh, yeah, the writer.

Well, Ms. Clark, I'm sorry.

I can't give out our clients'
numbers over the phone.

I mean, for one thing,
we have no way of verifying
it's actually you.

Oh, God, that's true, isn't it?
Um... Hmm.

Well, it really is me.

Um, could you call my agent?

[scoffs] Ms. Clark, it's not
that I don't believe you,

but I mean how can I be sure?

I mean, how would you feel
if some creep called
your agency

and said he was Mel Gibson?

Well... [laughs]

Not a good example, right?

Well, actually,
I could get in touch

with Mr. Blake in New York
and call you back.

Is there a number where
I could reach you?

Oh. Um, yeah,
that would be great.

I'm gonna be
at the Beverly Hills Hotel

this afternoon at a luncheon.

Maybe you could leave
a message at the front desk?

No problem. I'll try to get
in touch with Mr. Blake
right away.

And, Ms. Clark...
I just love your movies.

Oh, thanks.

Thanks for your help.
Bye-bye.

[applause]

Thank you very much.

Thank you, everybody.
Thank you.

Well, let me be honest
with you.

I can never understand why
we have to throw a banquet

to raise money
for starving people.

[laughter]

But let me just say this,

that the generous contributions
you have made

have already exceeded

the calories
you'll consume today.

So eat up and enjoy!
Thank you, thank you very much.

Thank you.

Enjoy your afternoon.

Amanda.

It's been such a long time.

-How are you?
-Good!

Gosh, you look terrific.

Oh, thanks.
You look great yourself.

Well, you know me.

I'm just an old
tired fundraiser.

[laughs]

Doing a great job,
as always.

Well, you know,
it keeps me out of trouble.

Listen, I heard
about you and Rich.

Rich who?

Okay, so that's how it is.
All right

This is the question.

Are you looking,
and have you met anybody?

No, not... not really.

Okay, I did meet
someone interesting.

-Really?
-Yeah, but I'm not really sure
what he thinks of me.

Oh, come on, what,
are you serious?

Is he stupid?

Is he married, gay?

He's a writer.

[scoffs] He's probably
all three. [laughs]

Actually, I don't know
that much about him yet,

but... he sent me flowers.

[gasps] Flowers!
A romantic.

That's a really good sign.

-Oh, thank you.
-Oh, yes, thank you, thank you.

Okay, I'll tell you what.

Why don't you ask around?
You know?

These people know everything
about everyone,

or at least they think they do,
so come on, I'll introduce you.

-I don't wanna ask 'em.
-Oh, come on!

Listen, I will pick
their pockets,

you pick their brains.
Let's go.

Like, a lot of flowers?

Amanda:
Oh, yeah.

Is it McMurphy?
I thought it was Murray.

Anyway, yes,
I remember very well.

He was always into trouble,
drank like a fish. Ahh!

His was a very famous case.

In purely
psychoanalytical terms,

he bears the classic symptoms
of the Madonna whore complex.

And by Madonna,
I'm speaking of the virgin.

He used to date
my granddaughter,
the son of a bitch.

He never even came
into the house,

the son of a bitch.

He wasn't even Jewish,
the son of a bitch.

Yeah, Harold McMurphy.

Wasn't he the guy, the writer
that was caught

plagiarizing Paddy Chayefsky?

Always had a couple of girls
on the side, too.

-Yeah, Ms. Clark.
Message for you.
-I remember him.

Thank you.

-Could you excuse me a minute?
-Yes.

-Thank you.
-No problem, honey.

Twelve cancellations.

Isn't that beautiful?

[sighs]

[phone ringing]

Trolleywood.
Trolleywood Tours.

-[static on phone]
-Hello?

-Hello, can...
-[static on phone]

-Harold's Dad: Hello?
-Can you hear me?

[static continues]

Hello?

Hello?

Oh, baby. Ah, there you are.

-[sighs]
-[phone auto-dialing]

-[phone ringing]
-[grunts]

Yeah? Trolleywood,
for Pete's sakes.

Amanda: [voice breaking up]
Hello... is Harold there?

What? Is that you, Lulu?

Hey, could you speak up?
I can hardly hear you.

I'd like to speak
to Harold, if I may.

Nah, he's not here right now.

But he oughta be back
pretty soon.

Amanda:
I haven't heard from him
since the other night.

-I was just wondering...
-Yeah, well, I'll tell you
how he is.

He's a jerk.

I mean, I hate to say it,

but I think you're
wasting your time.

I'm beginning to think he
doesn't like real women at all.

You know, all he likes
is those Hollywood floozies.

Are you sure we're talking
about the same Harold?

Yeah. I know it's hard
to believe,

and I've, I've known him
a lot of years.

Listen, I tried to get him
to call you.

He wouldn't do it.

If you want,
I'll try again, but...

I don't think
it's gonna do any good.

No, that's okay.
If he didn't wanna call, no.

Harold's Dad: Listen,
I am so sorry.

I think it's a shame
myself, but hey...

forget him, you know?

Do yourself a favor
and get on with your life.

Yes, I will, all right.
Thank you.

Wait, who is this?

Poor kid.

-Hello?
-[phone beeping]

God!

♪♪

Well, look who's here.

Can I get you something?

Drink? Pedicure?

No, thanks, I'm fine.

Amanda, if you were fine,
you wouldn't be hanging around

in a party dress
at three o'clock
in the afternoon.

What's wrong?

Sid, uh...

I need to talk to you.

Sidney, sweetheart,
we gotta get this out.

-Oh.
-You're gonna oxidize here.

-Give me just a minute.
-Let me just get this one.

Okay.

Okay, so tell me what happened.

Amanda: Okay, it's about Harold.
You know, the writer.

I just... I don't know.

Sid, I think I might have been
really wrong about him.

[laughs] Well,
he's a writer, honey.

You know how writers are.

Yeah, but I thought he was
this sweet sort of innocent man,

and now I find out from somebody

that apparently
knows him really well,

he's a real jerk.

I mean, Sid, I should have
found out more about him.

I never trusted him.

-He was too, what do you
call it, too evasive.
-I know.

But you know there are
a lot of people who would
be a whole lot happier

if this rewrite deal
fell through.

I'm starting to lose
my faith in people.

In men.

You have to protect yourself,
Amanda.

Things are different now.

When you're hot, everybody
has their own agenda.

-It shouldn't have
to be that way.
-That's show biz, honey.

[horn honks]

-Hey.
-Hey.

-How was the run?
-It was all right.

We made up for some stuff.

-You'll never guess who called.
-Who?

-Lulu.
-Oh.

She was so torn up because
you hadn't talked to her.

-I don't wanna hear--
-She didn't even sound
like herself.

I may sue Lulu, okay?
Don't talk about her.

Don't worry,
I let her down easy.

So, what's going on?

Well, I think I'm
gonna go try writing.

You know, everyone thinks
I'm a writer.

-I might as well try it.
-Okay, so what you're saying is,

you're gonna write
the damn thing.

Yeah. Well, saying is one thing
and doing it is another.

All right, don't be
so stressful about it.

You know what you gotta do?
You gotta get yourself drunk.

[scoffs] That's gonna solve
my problems, Dad, getting drunk?

Nah, I'm serious, Harold.
I never heard of a writer
that didn't drink.

There was Hemingway.
What a drunk he was.

-That guy O'Neill.
-Yeah.

Seriously,
just have a cocktail.

Harold, it's not a big deal.

It loosens up
all your phagocytes.

I don't know what
that means, but...

you think that would help?

If there was one place
in life I'd failed you,

it was there.

I should have taught you
how to drink.

Just give it a try.

Okay.

Well...

I'll think about it, Dad.

All right. Go slow.

-All right.
-I love you.

[rock music playing]

-Harold!
-[screams]

What?

Wake up, man.

Why are you yelling?

That's so wrong.

Are you okay?

Yeah, look at How do I feel?

You look like a hundred bucks.

[Harold stammering]

You know, I have never seen
anyone get drunk so fast

on one drink.
You're gonna hurt yourself.

Please get off the babysitter.

-Please, your mother and I...
-Look, you need...

...are very, very,
very proud of you.

You need to ease up, brother,
if you want a ride home

'cause I still got a couple
more hours to work.

Woman:
Danny! Danny, Danny.

Oh, my fan club.

-Yes, man.
-Mwah!

Mwah! Where have you guys been?
I missed you.

-We missed you, too.
-We had an audition with
a casting director we know.

-Both of you?
-He's into group sex.

-Ooh.
-Harold: Is he casting
a crowd scene?

-[Danny laughs]
-I'm sorry.

This is my good friend
Harold McMurphy,

and he is a fabulous writer.

-Really?
-Harold: Yes.

Would I know your work?

-Are you rich?
-Um...

Well, you know,
I'm in training, actually.

-Oh.
-Yes, I'm in training.

Yeah. You guys smell good.

-Thank you.
-And don't take that
the wrong way.

-So do you.
-Oh, thank you very much.
Thank you, thank you.

You know, I'm having fun.
Danny's good,
I'm living the dream.

-Right now.
-[women laugh]

-I'd like to buy
you guys a drink.
-Oh.

-Sure.
-Sure.

All right. You know, I'd like
to buy everyone a drink.

I always wanted to say that.

I wanna buy everyone a drink.
Danny, I wanna buy,

I wanna buy those people a drink
right behind me,

I wanna buy these people
a drink.
Danny, take me seriously.

-[Danny laughs]
-Take me seriously!

-I'm taking you seriously.
-I wanna buy these people...

I wanna buy...

Sidney! I know that woman.

Sidney.
Harold McMurphy.

[inaudible]

[laughing] She heard me.

You're gonna like her.
She's...

She's... she's...
she's weird.

Harold.

-Hey.
-What a surprise.

-Yeah.
-I was just talking about you.

-Just now?
-No. Earlier.

-Oh.
-How are you?

-I'm...
-You look like you're
doing just fine.

-I... Sorry. Sorry.
-Oooh!

[whispering]
I'm a little drunk.

Good, good.

Let me get you something.

Would you and your friends
like some champagne?

-Yeah, I would--
-Bartender.

I'd like a bottle of
your best domestic champagne

for my good friend Harold
and his lovely...

-This is my friend Tory.
-Hi. Carrie.

-Carrie.
-I'm Tory.

-This is Tory.
-Companions.

-Yes, indeed.
-Put it on my tab.

Wow, that's very nice of you.
Thank you.

My pleasure.
So good to see you like this.

-Thank you.
-But I gotta run.

-Enjoy.
-You won't have a quick drink?

Hey, Sidney, will you tell
Amanda that I said hello?

-Oh, believe me, I will.
-Okay.

What a good guy.
Good guy.

Yeah, I think you ought
to get down here.

There's something here
I think you should see.

Just trust me.

[laughing]

Oh, hey!

[blues guitar playing]

-Whoo!
-Ahhhhhh!

[groans]

[laughing]

What do you write with?

Ehhhhh.
I write with, um...

I write with my typewriter
and my Bic pen...

-What?
-Your big pen?

-A big what?
-No, my...

Harold says he has
a big pen.

No, my Bicpen.
I have a Bic pen.

-Okay.
-That's what I write with.

Come on, girls.

Doesn't look that "Bic" to me.

Hey! Come on, now.

You know...

Whooo!

[trio laughing]

-Whoo!
-Harold.

-Ha ha!
-Harold.

-[laughing]
-Harold!

What? What?

Hey! Hey, Amanda.

How you doing?

Hey.

Amanda!

You know her?

Yeah. Amanda.

Hold on a second.

Wait a minute.
Amanda, what's going on? Hey!

What are you doing?
What's wrong?

I'm confused.
Are you okay?

-I'm fine.
-You're okay?

-I'm fine.
-I'm-I'm very happy to see you.

-You're drunk, okay?
-I'm a little drunk, but I--

Yeah. If you wanted
to see me that badly, Harold,
you could have called me, okay?

You wanted me to call you,
I would have called you.

I would do anything
to call you.

-You know, that's really quite
an act you put on.
-What?

Really. I mean, you deserve
an award for making me think
you were different,

but I can see that you're like
every other slime bucket
in this town.

-That's not--
-You're just like
all of them, Harold.

No, no, why?
Because of those girls?

I don't remember their names.
I just met them--

Harold, that even
makes it worse.

The least you could do
is remember their names,

treat them like human beings.

Next thing I know
you're gonna tell me

they lured you here
and made you get drunk.

-No, no, I meant to get drunk.
I came here to get drunk.
-Oh, you're disgusting.

No, no, hold on.
Hold on a second.

I got drunk because I wanted
to show you that I can write.

-Okay? Give me a chance
to show you that I can write.
-Don't bother.

-Why?
-Look, I don't need you to write

any more
of your sexist crap, okay?

Really. Just go back
to your little girlfriends
and leave me alone.

Amanda, wait a minute,
where are you going?
Amanda, listen to me.

Don't leave. Amanda, you want me
to tell you the truth?

-No, no, listen to me!
-You just played with me,
Harold, leave me alone.

Amanda, I'm not a writer,
I'm a tour bus driver!

I'm just a tour bus driver.

-[door slams]
-Harold's Dad: I mean, is it--

Did you at least
gas the bus for tomorrow?

Dad, I told you, I gotta work
until it's done, okay, please.

What are you saying, you're not
gonna do anything else?

-I'm supposed to do everything
around here?
-No, I'll do it.

I'll tell you what,
I will make the dinner

and I'll drive the trolley,
but that's it, please, Dad.

Harold, you know what,
I don't get it.

What is the point
in knocking yourself out?

You--you got a D
in spelling twice.

-That doesn't matter.
-All right--

-It doesn't matter.
-What I mean is,

there is a lot of writers
out there with more
experience than you!

It's one thing to say
you're a hotshot writer,

and it's another thing to think
that you really believe it!

I don't have time to explain
all that to you, okay?

Maybe you're right,
maybe I'm not a writer.

I know a good story
and I know movies.
It's all in my head.

If I can get it down on paper,
then I could do something.

All right. But try not
to type too loud.

♪♪

♪ House of wonder ♪

♪ House of pain ♪

♪ Looking out for all
the things that I have tried ♪

♪ To rearrange ♪

♪ Boiling water ♪

♪ Burning sun ♪

♪ Holding on to memories
of everything ♪

♪ That I've ever done ♪

♪ Change is coming and ♪

♪ Change is good ♪

♪ It's done everything
that I ♪

♪ Ever wished it would ♪

♪ But it stands so tall ♪

♪ Walks so strong ♪

♪ It's taken over me ♪

♪ Change is coming and ♪

♪ Change is good ♪

♪ It's done everything
that I ♪

♪ Ever hoped it would ♪

♪ But it keeps me awake ♪

♪ At night ♪

♪ Worn-out shoe soles ♪

♪ Hurting pride ♪

♪ Making sense of all
the places that I've been ♪

♪ On the inside ♪

♪ Hands are hurting ♪

♪ Waking nights ♪

♪ Now I wonder why
I ever wanted to ♪

♪ Start this flight ♪

♪ Change is coming and ♪

♪ Change is good ♪

♪ It's done everything
that I've ♪

♪ Ever understood... ♪

[knock on door]

Where the hell did you
come from, Alhambra?

♪ It's taken over me ♪

♪ Change is coming and ♪

♪ Change is good ♪

♪ It's done everything that I ♪

♪ Ever wished it would ♪

♪ But it keeps me awake ♪

♪ At night ♪

Hello, folks.

Welcome aboard
Trolleywood Tours.

Today's tour will take
about an hour and 15 minutes.
We're gonna have a lot of fun.

♪ I thank you
for the times ♪

♪ That you managed to
keep me in my place ♪

♪ And red-orange
leaves fall ♪

♪ Into love ♪

♪ Watching as the wind
fills the wings ♪

♪ Of my very own turtle dove ♪

♪ Change is coming and ♪

♪ Change is good ♪

♪ It's done everything
that I ♪

♪ Ever wished it would... ♪

That was almost a freebie.

♪ But it stands so tall ♪

♪ It walks so strong ♪

♪ It's taken over me ♪

♪ Change is coming and ♪

♪ Change is good ♪

♪ It's done everything
that I ♪

♪ Ever wished it would ♪

♪ But it keeps me awake ♪

♪ At night ♪

♪ Yes, it keeps me awake ♪

♪ At night ♪

[sighs]

Announcer:
This morning's traffic,

all major highways
are moving quite well...

Hey, good morning.

Don't worry about breakfast,
I had something delivered.

And don't drink
out of the carton.

-I'm not.
-Reports showing newfound
strength in housing...

Finished the rewrite.

What, you...
you finished the screenplay?

-Yep.
-No kiddin'?

-Mm-hmm.
-But... you finished early.

-I thought you had
a couple more days to go.
-So did I.

Apparently I didn't.

So... what do you think?

Is it... worth anything?

I don't know.
I don't think so.

When do you find out?

I don't think I'm going to.
I just talked to her.

She doesn't ever want
to see me again.

[mumbling] She doesn't
want to see you again?

What... Why not?
You have a deal.

Yeah, that's
what I thought, too, but...

apparently she found out
about me.

She kept talking about

me and my pre-occupation
for Hollywood floozies.

Wh--What does that mean?
"Floozies"?

No one uses that word anymore.

I gotta get out of here.
I got a trolley to drive.

Jesus.

-We haven't seen that.
-Welcome to Trolleywood Tours.

-Can I take
your tickets, please?
-Oh, oh.

Do you think we'll see
a movie star?

-No, absolutely not, no way.
-What?

Well, that's not what
the fella at the station said.

He said it was practically
a sure thing.

Well, maybe we'll see one
anyway, dear.

♪ Open your eyes ♪

♪ If you wanna start a fire ♪

♪ Turn out the lights ♪

♪ Let me take you higher ♪

♪ Girl ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ And this heart of mine ♪

♪ Will be burning
with desire ♪

♪ Fire inside ♪

♪ With a spirit-mystifying ♪

♪ Love ♪

♪ Oh, love ♪

♪ And as a man once said ♪

♪ In a book about dreams ♪

♪ The closer you get to love ♪

♪ The farther it seems ♪

♪ There's a man once said
in a book about dreams ♪

[doorbell rings]

♪ The closer you get to love
the harder it seems ♪

[doorbell rings]

♪ Don't turn around
straight ahead... ♪

Hi there. I, uh...

[laughs] I'm...
I'm Harold's father.

You know Harold McMurphy?

Well, yeah, of course.

Listen, um...

We have a situation here

and I really need
to talk to you.

Do you think that's possible?

Sure. Come on in.

Thank you.

Wow!

This is... clean.

Welcome to Beverly Hills,
everybody.

Coming up on your right,
you'll see the home

where Gloria Swanson
used to live.

You remember Gloria from
the film Sunset Boulevard.

She played the actress
who shoots

the lying, no-good writer,
William Holden, in the back.

Just remember, you should
always tell the truth.

'Cause if you don't, you get
exactly what you deserve.

Can't pretend to be
somebody else.

'Cause you're just
gonna hurt someone...

Uh, just 'cause she's
a movie star

doesn't mean that she doesn't
have feelings.

Probably got deeper feelings
than you'll ever know.

She's a real person.

She's not made of wax.

Forget about being preoccupied
with movie stars.

They're just people.

They're your neighbor,
they're your best friend.

They're somebody you know.

Deal with your own life.

Your own integrity.

Never give it away.

Tell the truth and run.

Tell the truth and stay.

I betcha he's in love.
[chuckles]

-I bet he is, he's kind of
a handsome young man.
-Oh, my God.

I mean, I'm not saying
that movies are bad.

Movies, they're great.
They serve an amazing purpose.

They tell a great story,
can tell you a lot
about your life.

What you're doing wrong...

[horn honks]

[blares]

Hey, there's Rich Adams!

-Man: What, where?
-Woman: What?

Man 2:
Is this somebody?

You!

♪♪

...what you gotta do
to make things right.

Hey!

[bell clangs]

Hang on, everybody.

Hey, could you get out
of the way?

-Oh!
-Rich: What? To you, too!

Get out of the way,
come on, move.

-Leave the car alone.
-Uggh!

Lady, get outta the way.
Would you please get out
of the way?

Humph! Humph!

♪ Oh, C... ♪

-Whoa!
-♪ C. C. Rider ♪

-♪ I said see ♪
-Ohh!

♪ What you have done now ♪

♪ Oh, C... ♪

♪ C. C. Rider ♪

♪ I said see ♪

♪ What you have done now ♪

-[tires squealing]
-♪ Oh, you made me
love you ♪

-♪ Now, now... ♪
-Hey, buddy!

You're supposed to turn left
on Sunset Boulevard.

You're going the wrong way!

-Oh, I'm dizzy!
-♪ Oh... ♪

♪ I'm going away now,
baby ♪

♪ And I won't be back
till fall, yeah ♪

-[tires squealing]
-♪ Oh, I'm going ♪

♪ Where some peace is ♪

♪ And I won't be ♪

♪ Back till fall, yeah ♪

-♪ And if I find me ♪
-Whoa!

♪ A new girl ♪

-♪ I won't be back at all... ♪
-We should report him.

-Are you all right, dear?
-Yes, I Are you all right?

-Yes.
-♪ C. C. Rider ♪

-[tires squealing]
-[passengers screaming]

♪ Ah, Jenny, Jenny, Jenny ♪

♪ Now, won't you
come along with me ♪

♪ Jenny, Jenny
ooo, Jenny, Jenny ♪

♪ Jenny, Jenny, Jenny, now
won't you come along with me ♪

♪ Jenny, Jenny
ooo, Jenny, Jenny... ♪

[tires screeching]

[horn blaring]

Hold on!

We just smoked Rich Adams!

This is like the bus
from Speed!

-[laughs]
-What's happening?

I think he's psychotic!

Cool!

Rich: The guy in the trolley
cut me off.

-I don't care, sir.
Stay in the car.
-I can explain--

Amanda!
I have a confession to make.

You lied to me?

Yes, I did, and I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

So, what else did you
lie about, Harold?

I don't know what you mean.

I mean those girls.
Are you seeing one of them?

No, I am not.

No. No one.

Well, your father
came to see me.

In fact, he's still here.

My-My father's in your house?

No, actually he's in the pool.

Oh, my God. Want me--
I'll get him out.

No, it's fine. Harold,
that's not why I'm upset.

Is it because of the money?
I'll find a way to get it back
to you, I promise.

No, it's not about the money,
it's about the screenplay.

I read it.

You read my screenplay?

Mm-hmm. And there's one
question I have to ask you.

What makes you think you're
qualified to write a love scene?

I mean, when was the last time
you were in love?

Actually, a lot more recent
than you think.

Yes, well, I certainly
couldn't tell

from the scene in the woods.

I mean, here they are
in the middle of nowhere,

she's just come back
to save his life...

and all you can
have him do is...

reach out and shake her hand?

Well, it's a family picture.

Oh, Harold,
for goodness' sakes,

it's the 1990s.

I mean, it's sweet and all,
but it's a little naive,

don't you think?

Well, I liked it
when I wrote it.

Okay, you liked it,
but did you believe it?

-Yeah, I believed it.
-Yeah?

Yeah.

Well, Harold...

if you were there
with that woman

and she had just saved
your life...

wouldn't you at least...

wipe the dust off of her cheek?

Hmm?

I mean,
wouldn't you take your arms

and wrap them around her waist
and pull her close?

Wouldn't you look into her eyes
and tell her how you felt?

Hmm?

[cheering and applause]

-Bravo!
-[laughing]

[mouthing words]

I told you he was in love!

[passengers cheering
and applauding]

I'm sorry,
I'm sorry about that.

Did you like it?

My screenplay?
Did you like my screenplay?

Harold, it was...

it was just right.

-Really?
-Yeah! It's so good! I love it!

Yay!

Man: Here we go.
Come on, out of the bus.

There she is.

[tourists laughing]

Ms. Clark, may I have
your autograph?

-Yes, sir. Okay.
-And make it to George.

-Oh, no, no, no. Guys.
-[woman laughing]

Oh, I apologize.
Sorry about that.

Please? This is just like
a real movie.

[laughter]

Okay, get back
on the bus, everybody.

This is...
It's not part of the tour.

It isn't part of the tour.

-[tourists murmuring]
-Woman: Thank you, dear.

Harold!

She's got marble toilets,
honest to God.

Dad, d-don't touch anything.
For me?

You got-- You got good taste.
The chandeliers.

The whole place
is like slippery.

It's wonderful.

Oh, hello.

[tourists oohing and ahhing]

Woman:
Isn't that wonderful?

♪♪

♪ Hey, Johnny ♪

♪ I can see that look
in your eyes ♪

♪ Stop now
you're making me... ♪

Now, Harold, listen to
your agent, Sidney Stone.

We're not gonna turn this into
some kind of a crusade, are we?

I know it's
a Shakespeare adaptation,

but if they want
a talking ostrich,

then give 'em
a talking ostrich, who cares?

♪ It's hard enough
to know myself ♪

♪ That I can do better
than that ♪

♪ Stand back
and let me see... ♪

And coming up on your right

is the home of film star
Amanda Clark

and Oscar-winning screen writer
Harold McMurphy.

Now, there's a writer for you.

[chuckles]

♪♪

♪ I can only
hear the rhythm ♪

♪ Taking me back home ♪

♪ To you ♪

♪ And in the darkness ♪

♪ In my weakness ♪

♪ Forsaking me ♪

♪ I dream of you ♪

♪ I can only hear
the rhythm ♪

♪ Pulling me ♪

♪ Close to you ♪

[crowd cheering]

My next guest is one
of Hollywood's brightest
rising young stars.

Just last year he was tending
bar on La Brea Avenue.

This year he's starring
in one of L.A.'s hottest plays.

Hot plays in L.A.?
Is that possible?

Anyway, here he is
to tell us all about it.
Please welcome Mr. Danny Sam!

[band playing, crowd cheering]

Hello. Have a seat.

Let me ask you something.

Before I start, I gotta ask you
about one thing here.

Amanda Clark
and a tour bus driver.

What, uh...
What is that all about?

Well, Jay, I...

It's a love story,
I have to tell you that, um...

♪ So I'll talk in my sleep ♪

♪ Just to hear
your voice again ♪

♪ And I'll walk
through my dreams ♪

♪ Hoping that my tears
will end ♪

♪ When I can only hear
the rhythm ♪

♪ Ahhhh ♪

♪ So I'll talk in my sleep ♪

♪ Just to hear
your voice again ♪

♪ And I'll walk
through my dreams ♪

♪ Hoping that my tears
will end ♪

♪ And I'll talk in my sleep ♪

♪ Just to hear
your voice again ♪

♪ And I'll walk
through my dreams ♪

♪ Hoping that my tears
will end ♪

♪ When I can only hear
the rhythm ♪

♪ I can only hear the rhythm ♪

♪ As time escapes ♪

♪ I count the moments
in the soul ♪

♪ And every echo
every heartbeat ♪

♪ Keeps you here ♪

♪ I won't let you go ♪

♪ I can only hear you ♪

♪ In the night ♪

♪ We're oh so right ♪

♪ I can only see ♪

♪ You and I ♪

♪ So I'll talk in my sleep ♪

♪ Just to hear
your voice again ♪

♪ And I'll walk
through my dreams ♪

♪ Hoping that
my tears will end ♪

♪ When I can only hear
the rhythm ♪

♪ Ahhhh ♪

♪ So I'll talk in my sleep ♪

♪ Just to hear
your voice again ♪

♪ And I'll walk
through my dreams ♪

♪ Hoping that my tears
will end ♪

♪ And I'll talk in my sleep ♪

♪ Just to hear
your voice again ♪

♪ And I'll walk
through my dreams ♪

♪ Hoping that my tears
will end ♪

♪ When I can only hear
the rhythm ♪

♪ I can only hear the rhythm ♪

♪ Oooh... ♪

♪ I can only hear... ♪