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1
00:00:01,802 --> 00:00:03,971
♪♪
2
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Slater, grow up.
3
00:00:10,277 --> 00:00:12,946
The guy is just a
football player.
4
00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,482
Hey, Kelly, can you
believe this guy?
5
00:00:15,549 --> 00:00:18,519
He wants to get Johnny Walters
to autograph his rookie card.
6
00:00:18,619 --> 00:00:20,554
You've got his rookie card?
7
00:00:20,854 --> 00:00:23,090
All I've got is his
underwear ad.
8
00:00:26,660 --> 00:00:28,028
What is with you?
9
00:00:28,128 --> 00:00:30,364
I mean, Walters puts on his
underwear one leg at a time,
10
00:00:30,464 --> 00:00:31,765
just like the rest of us.
11
00:00:31,932 --> 00:00:33,667
Is that how you guys do it?
12
00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:38,105
You know, I really wish I could go
to that alumni banquet tomorrow.
13
00:00:38,138 --> 00:00:41,608
Yeah, it's not every day Cal
U retires a guy's jersey.
14
00:00:41,675 --> 00:00:42,676
Uh-huh.
15
00:00:42,743 --> 00:00:45,012
Looks like they've already
retired his pants.
16
00:00:45,679 --> 00:00:47,214
[knocking]
17
00:00:48,115 --> 00:00:49,583
Hey, Mike.
What's up?
18
00:00:49,683 --> 00:00:52,019
Your grade in psychology.
You got a B.
19
00:00:52,119 --> 00:00:53,520
Oh, that's great.
20
00:00:53,554 --> 00:00:54,855
I owe you one.
21
00:00:54,955 --> 00:00:56,757
Hey, that's what a teaching
assistant's for.
22
00:00:56,824 --> 00:00:58,725
Besides, I kind of enjoy
helping you.
23
00:00:58,792 --> 00:00:59,760
Oh yeah?
24
00:00:59,827 --> 00:01:01,295
Well, if you thought
that was fun,
25
00:01:01,328 --> 00:01:03,330
you're gonna love helping
me on my term paper.
26
00:01:03,397 --> 00:01:04,398
It's due next week.
27
00:01:04,465 --> 00:01:06,033
Sure, when do you want to start?
28
00:01:06,500 --> 00:01:07,835
Next week.
29
00:01:09,197 --> 00:01:10,404
What's wrong with right now?
30
00:01:10,504 --> 00:01:12,573
Oh, Mike, come on.
It's homecoming weekend.
31
00:01:12,673 --> 00:01:14,808
There's football, parties,
parades.
32
00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:17,077
Yep, I'm on the clean-up
committee.
33
00:01:17,211 --> 00:01:19,913
I get to walk behind our
fraternity's float.
34
00:01:20,147 --> 00:01:21,882
We have elephants this year.
35
00:01:24,318 --> 00:01:25,719
Well, I'm just gonna study.
36
00:01:25,819 --> 00:01:28,388
Oh, and my buddy, Johnny
Walters, is coming by.
37
00:01:28,689 --> 00:01:30,424
Wait, Johnny Walters
is coming here?
38
00:01:30,557 --> 00:01:32,092
- Yeah. Yeah.
- To the dorm?
39
00:01:32,192 --> 00:01:33,694
I'm gonna go change.
40
00:01:34,561 --> 00:01:37,064
Just remember, one
leg at a time.
41
00:01:38,232 --> 00:01:39,466
Oh, I forgot.
42
00:01:39,566 --> 00:01:41,835
You and Walters played ball
together here at Cal U.
43
00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:43,570
Yeah, and on the 49ers.
44
00:01:43,670 --> 00:01:44,838
Hey, Mike, will you
introduce me?
45
00:01:44,938 --> 00:01:46,373
Oh, please.
What is with you?
46
00:01:46,473 --> 00:01:48,408
Come on, Walters is just
another jock who thinks
47
00:01:48,509 --> 00:01:51,044
just because he gets a million
bucks to endorse some sneaker,
48
00:01:51,144 --> 00:01:52,946
his gym socks don't smell.
49
00:01:53,981 --> 00:01:55,849
You make a good point, Zack.
50
00:01:55,983 --> 00:01:58,418
By the way, have you
met Johnny Walters?
51
00:01:59,887 --> 00:02:01,421
- Hey.
- What's up.
52
00:02:02,022 --> 00:02:04,024
- How are you?
- Hey, how are you?
53
00:02:04,258 --> 00:02:06,360
Talk about a quarterback sneak.
54
00:02:07,194 --> 00:02:09,463
Why didn't you guys tell me
he was standing there?
55
00:02:13,333 --> 00:02:16,303
♪ I'm standing
at the edge of tomorrow, ♪
56
00:02:16,370 --> 00:02:19,540
♪ and it's all up to
me how far I go ♪
57
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:22,676
♪ I'm standing at the
edge of tomorrow ♪
58
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:26,146
♪ I've never seen
such a view before, ♪
59
00:02:26,246 --> 00:02:29,182
♪ a new world before my eyes ♪
60
00:02:29,283 --> 00:02:32,352
♪ So much for me to explore ♪
61
00:02:32,452 --> 00:02:34,788
♪ It's where my future lies ♪
62
00:02:34,888 --> 00:02:38,091
♪ Today, I'm standing at
the edge of tomorrow ♪
63
00:02:38,627 --> 00:02:41,150
♪ From here, the future
looks bright for me ♪
64
00:02:41,251 --> 00:02:44,407
♪ And it's all up to
me how far I go ♪
65
00:02:44,565 --> 00:02:47,534
♪ It's my time to break away ♪
66
00:02:47,634 --> 00:02:52,005
♪ I'm standing at the edge
of tomorrow today ♪
67
00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:03,717
Screech, my parents are gonna
be here in 20 minutes.
68
00:03:03,817 --> 00:03:05,953
Do you have to oil your
chain in here?
69
00:03:06,053 --> 00:03:08,255
Well, you don't want me
to squeak, do you?
70
00:03:09,389 --> 00:03:12,147
Last time I rode across campus,
squirrels followed me.
71
00:03:12,893 --> 00:03:16,363
Leslie, Screech has to be
handled in a very special way.
72
00:03:16,463 --> 00:03:17,598
Observe.
73
00:03:17,698 --> 00:03:19,166
- Screech?
- Huh?
74
00:03:19,266 --> 00:03:21,268
Get out now.
75
00:03:21,401 --> 00:03:22,669
OK.
76
00:03:24,805 --> 00:03:26,440
Oh, I almost forgot.
77
00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:28,742
The Burkes are arriving
for homecoming.
78
00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:30,844
You know, as in Burke Hall.
79
00:03:30,944 --> 00:03:33,947
Oh yeah, and how can we
forget Burke Library.
80
00:03:34,047 --> 00:03:35,716
- Oh, yes.
- Knock it off, guys.
81
00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:37,684
Ooh, a little tense, are we?
82
00:03:37,784 --> 00:03:39,319
Not the least little bit.
83
00:03:39,419 --> 00:03:42,055
(SCREAMING) Use the coaster.
Are you crazy?
84
00:03:43,790 --> 00:03:47,561
Hey, look at this, an article
on Johnny Walters.
85
00:03:47,761 --> 00:03:49,930
Man, I still can't believe
you insulted him.
86
00:03:50,030 --> 00:03:51,932
Aw, he's just another jock.
87
00:03:52,032 --> 00:03:53,333
Oh, check this out.
88
00:03:53,433 --> 00:03:56,570
He's also on the board of three
major corporations.
89
00:03:56,670 --> 00:03:59,606
On the other hand, he's a human
being and I've hurt his feelings.
90
00:04:00,607 --> 00:04:02,275
I'm gonna go apologize.
91
00:04:02,376 --> 00:04:05,746
OK, one more time, let it rip.
92
00:04:05,846 --> 00:04:07,414
[squawks].
93
00:04:08,882 --> 00:04:10,317
I've finally got it right.
94
00:04:10,417 --> 00:04:13,120
You are looking at the
next Cal U mascot.
95
00:04:13,286 --> 00:04:16,623
Wait, you're actually gonna
audition for Freddie Falcon?
96
00:04:16,723 --> 00:04:20,794
Oh yeah, and I had to work
really hard to find the bird within me.
97
00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:23,230
[squawks]
98
00:04:24,364 --> 00:04:25,699
What do you think?
99
00:04:25,832 --> 00:04:27,668
I think you look like a nut.
100
00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:30,103
Well, thank you.
101
00:04:30,203 --> 00:04:32,305
It's very nice of you
to make fun of me.
102
00:04:35,876 --> 00:04:37,477
Great going, Slater.
103
00:04:37,978 --> 00:04:40,347
Come on.
Alex, I was joking.
104
00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:41,715
Come on.
105
00:04:51,425 --> 00:04:52,993
[knocking]
MIKE (OFFSCREEN): Yo.
106
00:04:53,093 --> 00:04:56,096
Hey, Mike. I'm here to
work on my term-- oh, hi.
107
00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:59,299
I didn't know you had company.
108
00:04:59,399 --> 00:05:01,835
Look, Johnny, I'm--
I'm sorry I insulted you.
109
00:05:01,935 --> 00:05:03,370
Relax, kid.
I can take it.
110
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:05,505
I've been booed by 70,000
football fans.
111
00:05:05,605 --> 00:05:07,007
Ah, what do they know?
112
00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:09,209
They-- they take off their
shirts in freezing weather
113
00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:11,311
and paint, "Hi, Mom"
on their beer bellies.
114
00:05:11,645 --> 00:05:13,346
Boy, I miss the game.
115
00:05:14,081 --> 00:05:16,049
You know, I'll never forget
that play in the Super Bowl
116
00:05:16,149 --> 00:05:18,051
when you scrambled
away from four guys
117
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:19,686
and hit Simpson in
the end zone.
118
00:05:19,786 --> 00:05:22,255
Hey, I recovered a fumble
to set up that play.
119
00:05:22,355 --> 00:05:23,657
Yeah, that's great, Mike.
120
00:05:24,057 --> 00:05:25,992
You won the MVP that
year, didn't you?
121
00:05:26,126 --> 00:05:27,728
Yeah, I just got lucky.
122
00:05:27,828 --> 00:05:30,363
That was the year that my
Achilles tendon ruptured.
123
00:05:30,630 --> 00:05:31,765
No kidding?
124
00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:33,567
What a career.
125
00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:35,936
It is no wonder they're gonna honor
you at the banquet tomorrow night.
126
00:05:36,036 --> 00:05:37,637
Oh yeah, that reminds me.
127
00:05:37,938 --> 00:05:41,742
Mike, I would sure like it if
you did the introduction for me.
128
00:05:41,842 --> 00:05:45,712
Nah, I'm not the
best, you know--
129
00:05:45,846 --> 00:05:46,947
Speaker?
130
00:05:47,414 --> 00:05:48,849
Come on, Mike.
131
00:05:48,982 --> 00:05:51,251
Who knows me better than you?
132
00:05:51,752 --> 00:05:53,520
The Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders?
133
00:05:55,388 --> 00:05:57,824
But if you want me to, sure.
134
00:05:57,916 --> 00:05:58,850
Thanks, buddy.
135
00:05:58,904 --> 00:06:00,117
Now, what do you
say we grab some lunch?
136
00:06:00,180 --> 00:06:01,164
- Yeah, OK?
- My treat.
137
00:06:01,250 --> 00:06:02,740
- You want to come with us, kid?
- Sure.
138
00:06:02,789 --> 00:06:05,365
Those girls in the car commercial, are they
really as beautiful as they look on TV?
139
00:06:05,465 --> 00:06:07,000
You want to know the truth, kid?
140
00:06:07,100 --> 00:06:08,235
- They're better.
- Oh.
141
00:06:08,335 --> 00:06:11,204
You know, I did a commercial
for that Clapper thing once.
142
00:06:11,638 --> 00:06:13,607
I got a free one, too.
143
00:06:18,211 --> 00:06:20,480
[squawks].
144
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:29,189
I like that pecking thing.
145
00:06:29,756 --> 00:06:32,392
Look, if you're here to make
fun again, you can just forget it.
146
00:06:32,492 --> 00:06:33,693
I have work to do.
147
00:06:33,794 --> 00:06:35,128
No, no really.
148
00:06:35,228 --> 00:06:37,697
That was kind of cute, that
thing you do with your leg.
149
00:06:40,033 --> 00:06:41,535
- Really?
- Yeah.
150
00:06:41,635 --> 00:06:43,870
Maybe, though,
instead of doing this,
151
00:06:43,970 --> 00:06:47,674
you can kind of tilt your head
back and really [squawks].
152
00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:50,277
[squawks].
153
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,445
Yeah, I like that.
That's good.
154
00:06:52,579 --> 00:06:53,780
But this is no good.
155
00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:55,715
Remember, you're a falcon,
so you need bigger wings.
156
00:06:55,816 --> 00:06:57,050
- Oh, OK.
- And you need to flap bigger.
157
00:06:57,184 --> 00:06:58,251
- OK.
- Like this.
158
00:06:58,351 --> 00:07:00,387
- [squawks].
- [squawks].
159
00:07:01,988 --> 00:07:03,456
Yeah, yeah.
160
00:07:03,690 --> 00:07:06,359
[squawks]
161
00:07:08,161 --> 00:07:10,030
[squawks].
162
00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:13,700
You know, this always happens.
163
00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:15,602
The minute I learn
a new dance, pow,
164
00:07:15,702 --> 00:07:17,337
it' s not hip anymore.
165
00:07:20,674 --> 00:07:22,843
Honey, wouldn't this be
better in the closet?
166
00:07:22,976 --> 00:07:24,344
So where's yours?
167
00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:26,146
There's only one, mother.
168
00:07:26,346 --> 00:07:28,114
You share a closet with
two other girls?
169
00:07:28,215 --> 00:07:30,584
Walt, she shares a closet
with two other girls.
170
00:07:30,817 --> 00:07:32,385
I'll make a call.
171
00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:35,689
No, I'm fine with it, really.
172
00:07:36,089 --> 00:07:39,526
Now, you're not really going to
wear this dreadful jacket, are you?
173
00:07:39,926 --> 00:07:41,461
No, I am.
174
00:07:42,162 --> 00:07:43,663
That's mine, Mrs. Burke.
175
00:07:43,763 --> 00:07:45,699
Oh, baby.
You remember the Emersons?
176
00:07:45,799 --> 00:07:48,301
Their son Todd is going to be
calling to take you to the banquet.
177
00:07:48,435 --> 00:07:52,105
Oh gee, I'd love to meet
him, but you see, I--
178
00:07:52,939 --> 00:07:54,441
I already have a date.
179
00:07:54,541 --> 00:07:55,709
You have a date?
180
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:56,843
Do we know him?
181
00:07:56,943 --> 00:07:59,779
Now, Edith, I'm sure whoever
our girl has chosen will be just fine.
182
00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:01,348
Gotta run, baby.
183
00:08:01,448 --> 00:08:02,883
Well, it was so nice
to meet you.
184
00:08:02,983 --> 00:08:04,517
And remember, our offer
still stands.
185
00:08:04,651 --> 00:08:05,619
Oh, thank you.
186
00:08:05,752 --> 00:08:07,787
I'm sure your chauffeur's
son is very nice,
187
00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:09,856
but I can find
my own dates.
188
00:08:10,757 --> 00:08:12,392
Goodbye, sweetheart.
189
00:08:13,159 --> 00:08:14,461
- Goodbye.
- Bye.
190
00:08:14,561 --> 00:08:15,695
Bye now.
191
00:08:15,929 --> 00:08:17,364
[squawks].
192
00:08:22,369 --> 00:08:25,138
Next year, we get Leslie
her own apartment.
193
00:08:25,939 --> 00:08:27,440
I'll make a call.
194
00:08:28,375 --> 00:08:30,877
So who is this great guy you're
taking to the banquet?
195
00:08:30,977 --> 00:08:32,279
I wish I knew.
196
00:08:32,379 --> 00:08:33,980
I had to make something up.
197
00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:36,917
I can't stand the way they're
always controlling my life.
198
00:08:37,050 --> 00:08:38,652
And mine.
199
00:08:40,086 --> 00:08:41,755
Do you know what I
would love to do?
200
00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:44,257
Bring somebody that they would
never expect me to date,
201
00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:46,993
somebody that would really
freak them out.
202
00:08:47,294 --> 00:08:48,595
Hey, guys.
203
00:08:51,064 --> 00:08:52,299
You going to the parade?
204
00:08:52,399 --> 00:08:54,534
You don't want to miss
the elephants.
205
00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:04,611
See ya.
206
00:09:05,278 --> 00:09:08,715
Screech, I have something
important to ask you.
207
00:09:08,815 --> 00:09:10,083
OK.
208
00:09:10,517 --> 00:09:13,219
Would you be my date for
the homecoming banquet?
209
00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:15,956
Let me get this straight.
210
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:18,291
You're asking me on a date?
211
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:19,659
Yes.
212
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:21,895
Let me get this straight.
213
00:09:23,029 --> 00:09:25,031
You're asking me on a date?
214
00:09:25,465 --> 00:09:27,300
Well, kind of.
215
00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:29,502
You see, my parents are
going to be at the banquet,
216
00:09:29,602 --> 00:09:30,637
and what
I need is--
217
00:09:30,770 --> 00:09:32,372
You need a geek to shock
your parents?
218
00:09:32,472 --> 00:09:34,240
Is that what you're
trying to say?
219
00:09:34,674 --> 00:09:36,576
Well, kind of.
220
00:09:36,676 --> 00:09:38,311
Sure, no problem.
221
00:09:39,212 --> 00:09:41,014
You mean you don't mind?
222
00:09:41,214 --> 00:09:43,783
No, not at all.
I'm great at scaring parents.
223
00:09:43,883 --> 00:09:45,585
I scare my own all the time.
224
00:09:51,791 --> 00:09:53,793
You know, my dad and
I are major fans.
225
00:09:53,893 --> 00:09:55,495
I mean the first game
he ever took me to,
226
00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:57,597
you threw four touchdown
passes against the Rams.
227
00:09:57,697 --> 00:09:58,865
Hey, I remember that game.
228
00:09:58,999 --> 00:10:00,367
I cracked two ribs.
229
00:10:00,633 --> 00:10:01,901
That's great, Mike.
230
00:10:02,002 --> 00:10:03,470
So that's Kelly with a Y.
231
00:10:04,037 --> 00:10:05,271
There you go.
232
00:10:05,505 --> 00:10:06,606
Thank you.
233
00:10:06,706 --> 00:10:09,009
Johnny, may I ask you something?
234
00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:11,311
- You played at Cal U when?
- '78.
235
00:10:11,411 --> 00:10:12,512
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
236
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:15,281
Am I wrong or was this piece
of meatloaf here then?
237
00:10:15,949 --> 00:10:17,017
I like you, kid.
238
00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:18,952
You remind me of me when
I was in college.
239
00:10:19,052 --> 00:10:20,353
Remember the time
when that real--
240
00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:22,989
You know, Zack and I have to
work on a psychology paper.
241
00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:25,091
Oh yeah, studying's important.
242
00:10:25,158 --> 00:10:26,393
But by the way,
243
00:10:26,493 --> 00:10:29,262
how would you like to be my
guest at the banquet tomorrow night
244
00:10:29,362 --> 00:10:30,497
and bring a date?
245
00:10:30,597 --> 00:10:31,798
Well, that would be terrific.
246
00:10:31,898 --> 00:10:33,967
Well, I gotta go.
I'll see you at the game?
247
00:10:34,067 --> 00:10:35,835
- Yeah.
- Right, boom.
248
00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:37,237
Yes.
249
00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:38,338
Do you hear that, Mike?
250
00:10:38,438 --> 00:10:40,573
All the rich alumni are gonna
be there at the banquet.
251
00:10:40,707 --> 00:10:42,942
I can make some great business
connections tomorrow night.
252
00:10:43,076 --> 00:10:45,412
Zack, don't get your hopes up.
253
00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:47,714
Why? Johnny just
said he'd get me in.
254
00:10:47,981 --> 00:10:51,317
He's not the most reliable guy.
255
00:10:51,751 --> 00:10:56,289
Mike, now I know I'm not very
good at this psychology stuff,
256
00:10:56,389 --> 00:11:00,060
but am I sensing a little
jealousy here?
257
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:01,828
You're right.
258
00:11:02,028 --> 00:11:04,431
You're not very good at
this psychology stuff.
259
00:11:07,867 --> 00:11:09,069
Hey, Leslie.
260
00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:10,503
I'm going to the banquet
tomorrow night.
261
00:11:10,603 --> 00:11:11,838
How would you like
to go with me?
262
00:11:11,938 --> 00:11:13,640
Sorry, I'm going with Screech.
263
00:11:13,740 --> 00:11:15,175
Leslie, please.
264
00:11:15,408 --> 00:11:19,479
If you don't want to go out with me,
at least make up a believable excuse.
265
00:11:19,612 --> 00:11:22,649
OK, I'm washing my hair.
266
00:11:23,817 --> 00:11:25,985
Now that I believe.
267
00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:28,621
Slater, I got the part.
268
00:11:28,721 --> 00:11:31,291
I'm the school mascot.
I'm Freddie the Falcon.
269
00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:32,959
All right.
[applause]
270
00:11:34,394 --> 00:11:37,530
And, everybody, I could not have
done it without the help of this man.
271
00:11:37,630 --> 00:11:39,232
Nah, nah, I didn't do anything.
272
00:11:39,332 --> 00:11:40,633
Oh, sure you did, remember?
273
00:11:40,767 --> 00:11:42,669
You stood on that one
leg, and [squawks].
274
00:11:42,769 --> 00:11:43,903
You did that.
275
00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:45,305
No, not-- not here.
276
00:11:45,438 --> 00:11:47,640
You're right.
I should save it for the game.
277
00:11:47,740 --> 00:11:50,076
So anyway,
278
00:11:50,677 --> 00:11:52,645
I get to go to the
homecoming banquet,
279
00:11:52,745 --> 00:11:55,348
and I can bring a guest.
280
00:11:55,648 --> 00:11:57,750
And the guest can be a guy.
281
00:11:59,619 --> 00:12:01,454
And, well, you're a guy,
282
00:12:01,654 --> 00:12:03,723
and I was thinking
that maybe, you know--
283
00:12:03,823 --> 00:12:05,925
Alex, are you asking
me to the banquet?
284
00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:08,528
Yes, unless you
don't want to go,
285
00:12:08,661 --> 00:12:11,364
in which case you
misunderstood me completely.
286
00:12:12,799 --> 00:12:14,100
I'd love to.
287
00:12:14,601 --> 00:12:15,735
Great.
288
00:12:20,140 --> 00:12:21,674
[squawks]
289
00:12:22,976 --> 00:12:24,310
[squawks].
290
00:12:33,453 --> 00:12:35,722
This is gonna be so much fun.
291
00:12:36,489 --> 00:12:37,924
Thanks for asking me, Zack.
292
00:12:38,057 --> 00:12:40,793
Hey, who else would I ask?
293
00:12:43,963 --> 00:12:45,732
Well, we've made our appearance.
294
00:12:45,832 --> 00:12:47,333
I think we can go now.
Come on.
295
00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:48,568
Oh, don't be silly.
296
00:12:48,668 --> 00:12:51,004
They want me to pose for
pictures and greet the alumni.
297
00:12:51,104 --> 00:12:53,907
Hey, everybody, Freddie
the Falcon's here.
298
00:12:54,007 --> 00:12:56,409
[applause]
299
00:12:58,378 --> 00:13:00,947
OK, now, Leslie, is there
anything particularly geeky
300
00:13:01,047 --> 00:13:02,382
you'd like me to do tonight?
301
00:13:02,482 --> 00:13:05,418
Like, um, I can have a wheezing
attack during the main course.
302
00:13:05,518 --> 00:13:06,920
Or-- or you'll love this.
303
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:09,556
I can choke on some milk and
make it come out my nose and ears.
304
00:13:09,656 --> 00:13:11,124
That's always fun.
305
00:13:11,224 --> 00:13:13,393
Just be yourself, Screech.
306
00:13:13,493 --> 00:13:17,030
Oh, good, because the milk
thing I really can't control.
307
00:13:17,830 --> 00:13:20,500
Hi, baby.
Sorry we're late.
308
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:22,135
Hi, Mom.
309
00:13:22,468 --> 00:13:24,504
So which one is the
lucky fellow?
310
00:13:24,604 --> 00:13:26,072
Oh, that would be me.
311
00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:34,948
No, seriously.
312
00:13:35,915 --> 00:13:38,384
Zack Morris, Mel Cochran.
313
00:13:38,484 --> 00:13:41,187
Mel is the chairman of the board
of Diodine Computers.
314
00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:43,289
Mel, nice to meet you.
315
00:13:43,389 --> 00:13:46,492
I was very impressed to see that you
doubled your fourth quarter earnings.
316
00:13:46,593 --> 00:13:48,061
Well, thank you.
317
00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:50,263
Zack is an up and
coming finance major,
318
00:13:50,363 --> 00:13:53,099
and I just thought he'd be perfect
as our fourth for golf tomorrow.
319
00:13:53,233 --> 00:13:54,968
Really?
I'd love to.
320
00:13:55,034 --> 00:13:56,269
Well, I look
forward to it, Zack.
321
00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:58,137
- Me too.
- See you in a moment.
322
00:13:58,805 --> 00:14:01,441
I have a 15-minute break.
Do you want to dance?
323
00:14:01,574 --> 00:14:04,210
Um, I can't dance.
324
00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:06,646
I'm Amish.
325
00:14:08,248 --> 00:14:12,485
You know, I'm starting to get the
feeling that you're ashamed of me.
326
00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:14,487
Well, of course I'm ashamed.
327
00:14:14,587 --> 00:14:16,356
I'm on a date with Big Bird.
328
00:14:17,257 --> 00:14:19,692
Well, I certainly wouldn't
want to embarrass you.
329
00:14:19,792 --> 00:14:21,361
[sobs]
330
00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:31,271
Don't worry about that milk.
It won't stain.
331
00:14:31,771 --> 00:14:33,139
Thank you, thank you.
332
00:14:33,239 --> 00:14:34,574
So, uh, Scrunch?
333
00:14:34,674 --> 00:14:35,842
Uh, that's Screech.
334
00:14:35,975 --> 00:14:38,611
Scrunch, Screech, who cares?
I mean, what do you--
335
00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:41,681
what do you see yourself
doing five years from now?
336
00:14:41,948 --> 00:14:44,951
Well, Mr. Burke, if
things go well tonight,
337
00:14:45,184 --> 00:14:48,388
I see myself taking
over Burke Industries.
338
00:14:50,023 --> 00:14:52,859
Honey, let me get you your
blood pressure medication.
339
00:14:53,059 --> 00:14:55,895
Well, I may be taking over
sooner than I thought.
340
00:14:57,030 --> 00:14:58,031
Hey, Mike.
341
00:14:58,164 --> 00:14:59,632
Excuse me.
Guess what?
342
00:14:59,732 --> 00:15:03,336
Johnny invited me to play golf with
two major corporate players tomorrow.
343
00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:04,904
We're supposed to work
on your paper.
344
00:15:05,004 --> 00:15:06,339
Oh, Mike, come on.
Forget studying.
345
00:15:06,439 --> 00:15:08,374
We're talking high level
networking here.
346
00:15:08,508 --> 00:15:10,543
I can't believe all the cool
things this guy's doing for me.
347
00:15:10,643 --> 00:15:12,111
Zack, let me level with you.
348
00:15:12,245 --> 00:15:14,514
This guy is not as
cool as he seems.
349
00:15:14,614 --> 00:15:15,748
Yeah, right.
350
00:15:15,848 --> 00:15:17,617
And you said he wasn't going
to get me into the banquet either.
351
00:15:17,717 --> 00:15:21,054
The only reason he invited
you here is to feed his own ego.
352
00:15:21,154 --> 00:15:24,857
Trust me, Johnny Walters only
looks out for Johnny Walters.
353
00:15:25,892 --> 00:15:27,560
Well, you really are jealous.
354
00:15:27,660 --> 00:15:29,162
You know, just because
the guy's a superstar,
355
00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:31,030
that gives you no
reason to put him down.
356
00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:32,632
Why don't you get over it, Mike?
357
00:15:44,344 --> 00:15:45,812
[sobs]
358
00:15:45,912 --> 00:15:47,180
Alex?
359
00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:49,349
Alex, can I talk to
you a moment?
360
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:51,351
No, I'm not a parrot.
361
00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:53,586
I'm a falcon, and falcons
don't talk.
362
00:15:53,686 --> 00:15:56,789
We eat really big rats and
scratch their eyes out.
363
00:15:57,790 --> 00:15:59,158
Smile.
364
00:16:00,760 --> 00:16:04,764
Um, I want my picture taken
with the falcon.
365
00:16:04,864 --> 00:16:08,801
Why? So you can remember the
most embarrassing night of your life?
366
00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:13,172
Look, Alex.
367
00:16:13,539 --> 00:16:15,608
You've gotta admit.
You're different.
368
00:16:15,942 --> 00:16:17,777
I mean, good different.
369
00:16:17,877 --> 00:16:19,712
That's one of the reasons
I like you.
370
00:16:20,079 --> 00:16:22,148
It's just that this
kind of different
371
00:16:22,248 --> 00:16:24,083
takes some
getting used to.
372
00:16:25,284 --> 00:16:27,053
Wait a minute.
Back up.
373
00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:29,222
You like me?
374
00:16:29,722 --> 00:16:32,125
Well, yeah.
375
00:16:32,792 --> 00:16:35,728
And you could accept me
just the way that I am?
376
00:16:38,664 --> 00:16:39,866
I don't know.
377
00:16:40,133 --> 00:16:42,168
Will my lips fit inside
your beak?
378
00:16:47,673 --> 00:16:49,409
We could try.
379
00:16:54,714 --> 00:16:56,783
Wait till my dad hears
I danced with you.
380
00:16:56,916 --> 00:16:58,551
He's never gonna believe it.
381
00:16:58,818 --> 00:17:01,821
Hey, I have to run into the city
and do an interview with Bob Costas.
382
00:17:01,921 --> 00:17:03,322
Would you like to come along?
383
00:17:03,456 --> 00:17:04,690
Are you kidding?
384
00:17:04,791 --> 00:17:06,159
Oh, I'd love to.
385
00:17:06,292 --> 00:17:07,693
Is it OK If I go with
Johnny, Zack?
386
00:17:07,794 --> 00:17:10,363
Excuse me, Kelly, but there's a
president of a network over there.
387
00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:12,832
I don't think he minds.
388
00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,101
Mmm.
389
00:17:15,376 --> 00:17:18,171
Now, of course my dad
wanted me to be a surgeon,
390
00:17:18,271 --> 00:17:21,240
but there's really not much
difference in being a meat cutter,
391
00:17:21,340 --> 00:17:23,943
just a little more
room for error.
392
00:17:24,844 --> 00:17:28,114
Honey, you know it's really not
too late to go to college in France.
393
00:17:28,247 --> 00:17:29,882
I can make a call.
394
00:17:31,284 --> 00:17:34,287
Well, I couldn't possibly
leave my fiancé.
395
00:17:36,756 --> 00:17:38,057
Fiancé?
396
00:17:38,157 --> 00:17:40,526
Yes, uh, how about a June
wedding, my dear?
397
00:17:40,660 --> 00:17:42,428
Dad can carve the
meat sculpture.
398
00:17:42,528 --> 00:17:45,264
He makes a beautiful pork swan.
399
00:17:46,833 --> 00:17:48,401
Leslie, could we speak
to you alone?
400
00:17:48,501 --> 00:17:49,702
Yes.
401
00:17:50,303 --> 00:17:52,872
Pork swan?
Nice touch.
402
00:17:52,972 --> 00:17:54,207
Well.
403
00:17:57,310 --> 00:18:01,714
Honey, you are not marrying
this meat boy.
404
00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:05,218
Think about what you're doing.
You're a Burke, and he's a--
405
00:18:07,487 --> 00:18:08,888
Screech.
406
00:18:09,155 --> 00:18:10,823
Look, we're not getting married.
407
00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:12,024
He's not my boyfriend.
408
00:18:12,124 --> 00:18:13,559
I made up the whole thing.
409
00:18:13,659 --> 00:18:14,994
But why would you do that?
410
00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:17,930
Because I am sick of you
always telling me what to wear,
411
00:18:18,064 --> 00:18:20,199
who to date, what
school to go to.
412
00:18:20,299 --> 00:18:22,001
I'm 18 years old.
413
00:18:22,201 --> 00:18:24,837
It's time I started making
my own decisions.
414
00:18:25,271 --> 00:18:27,907
We only wanted the best
for our little girl.
415
00:18:28,174 --> 00:18:32,044
Well, what's best for me is that
you stop treating me like a little girl.
416
00:18:32,345 --> 00:18:35,348
Edith, I think we should talk
to our therapist about this.
417
00:18:35,615 --> 00:18:37,250
I'll make a call.
418
00:18:38,451 --> 00:18:43,122
So, Mom, Dad, I've been thinking
about names for the grand kids.
419
00:18:43,723 --> 00:18:46,158
What do you think of
Itchy and Scratchy?
420
00:18:52,064 --> 00:18:53,232
Hey there.
421
00:18:53,332 --> 00:18:54,600
Good morning.
422
00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:57,336
So how did Johnny's interview
go at the studio last night?
423
00:18:57,870 --> 00:18:58,905
Fine.
424
00:18:59,005 --> 00:19:00,973
Well, that was nice
of him to take you.
425
00:19:01,774 --> 00:19:03,876
Oh yeah, really nice.
426
00:19:04,243 --> 00:19:05,711
He's a great guy, huh?
427
00:19:06,245 --> 00:19:07,947
Oh yeah, he's a prince.
428
00:19:08,414 --> 00:19:10,483
So why don't I believe
a word you're saying?
429
00:19:12,418 --> 00:19:14,687
You want to know the truth
about our hero?
430
00:19:15,421 --> 00:19:17,056
He hit on me in the limo.
431
00:19:17,590 --> 00:19:19,091
And when I said no,
432
00:19:19,358 --> 00:19:21,093
he picked up another
girl at the TV station
433
00:19:21,227 --> 00:19:23,362
and told me to take a cab home.
434
00:19:25,331 --> 00:19:29,201
Johnny Walters,
big hero, big jerk.
435
00:19:30,403 --> 00:19:31,904
I had no idea.
436
00:19:32,405 --> 00:19:33,706
I'm sorry, Kelly.
437
00:19:33,973 --> 00:19:35,408
It's not your fault.
438
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:40,379
[knocking]
439
00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:42,081
Hey, Zack. You ready?
440
00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:43,749
Yeah, hold on a minute
there, Johnny.
441
00:19:43,967 --> 00:19:45,668
What happened with you
and Kelly last night?
442
00:19:45,785 --> 00:19:48,020
Oh, nothing, man.
You win a few, you lose a few.
443
00:19:48,120 --> 00:19:49,589
Come on.
The limo's waiting.
444
00:19:49,689 --> 00:19:50,990
Maybe another time.
445
00:19:51,090 --> 00:19:52,224
Another time?
446
00:19:52,325 --> 00:19:54,560
Zack, there won't
be another time.
447
00:19:54,660 --> 00:19:57,897
Now, these guys can get your career
moving before you even graduate.
448
00:19:58,197 --> 00:19:59,999
Think about this, buddy.
449
00:20:00,666 --> 00:20:02,034
I have.
450
00:20:03,135 --> 00:20:04,804
I'm gonna have to pass.
451
00:20:09,809 --> 00:20:11,510
[knocking]
452
00:20:15,181 --> 00:20:16,449
Hey, Mike.
453
00:20:16,849 --> 00:20:18,484
What happened to your golf game?
454
00:20:18,851 --> 00:20:21,153
Um, not playing.
455
00:20:21,754 --> 00:20:23,255
He stood you up, huh?
456
00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:25,491
Yeah, something like that.
457
00:20:26,859 --> 00:20:27,994
I'm sorry, Zack.
458
00:20:28,127 --> 00:20:29,195
Why?
459
00:20:29,295 --> 00:20:31,097
I mean, you warned
me about the guy,
460
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:33,466
and here I was just
thinking you were jealous.
461
00:20:34,667 --> 00:20:36,168
Want to know something?
462
00:20:36,802 --> 00:20:38,337
I am jealous.
463
00:20:39,038 --> 00:20:40,573
And why shouldn't I be?
464
00:20:40,806 --> 00:20:43,242
Walters has fame and money.
465
00:20:43,609 --> 00:20:45,411
He's a national hero.
466
00:20:46,579 --> 00:20:50,449
All I've got are two bad
knees and a 13-inch TV.
467
00:20:51,183 --> 00:20:52,518
It's color.
468
00:20:53,619 --> 00:20:55,021
Sometimes.
469
00:20:57,823 --> 00:20:59,558
Do you know what
really kills me?
470
00:20:59,959 --> 00:21:03,229
He's still playing a game that
I would play for nothing.
471
00:21:03,963 --> 00:21:05,464
That must be rough.
472
00:21:06,565 --> 00:21:07,900
My last game,
473
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:10,936
I couldn't bring myself
to take off my uniform
474
00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:14,306
because I knew that I would
never get to put it back on again.
475
00:21:15,908 --> 00:21:17,810
That scared the heck out of me.
476
00:21:19,178 --> 00:21:20,980
After the game,
477
00:21:22,148 --> 00:21:26,485
I walked around the field for
hours smelling the grass, the dirt.
478
00:21:27,319 --> 00:21:29,188
I didn't want to let it go,
479
00:21:31,090 --> 00:21:32,591
but I had to.
480
00:21:34,627 --> 00:21:36,328
The sprinklers came on.
481
00:21:38,464 --> 00:21:41,600
Mike, I know this isn't the NFL,
482
00:21:41,667 --> 00:21:43,869
but I'm telling you, the
kids here really need you.
483
00:21:43,969 --> 00:21:46,372
And I couldn't have gotten
through that test without you.
484
00:21:47,273 --> 00:21:50,109
I know that doesn't
sound like much.
485
00:21:51,877 --> 00:21:53,612
It means more than you think.
486
00:21:58,851 --> 00:22:00,386
Whoa.
487
00:22:06,058 --> 00:22:09,462
[laughs]
488
00:22:16,135 --> 00:22:18,437
[laughs]
489
00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:22,675
[screams]
490
00:22:25,911 --> 00:22:27,379
Ta-da.
33113
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