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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,072 --> 00:00:04,575 Hey. Thanks again for the hogs. 2 00:00:04,576 --> 00:00:06,010 We go through them so fast, 3 00:00:06,011 --> 00:00:07,479 and you never have a hog when you need one. 4 00:00:07,480 --> 00:00:09,316 Well, I'm happy to help out. 5 00:00:09,317 --> 00:00:11,454 If I've got a spare hog lying around, it's yours. 6 00:00:11,455 --> 00:00:14,095 Oh, and, um, also, thank you for not eating me. 7 00:00:14,095 --> 00:00:15,362 I don't say that enough. 8 00:00:15,363 --> 00:00:17,967 Oh, come on! I'd never eat you. 9 00:00:17,968 --> 00:00:21,409 - You're all bone. - I appreciate that. 10 00:00:21,409 --> 00:00:22,646 Ooh! Caravan! 11 00:00:22,646 --> 00:00:24,479 We don't get many travelers through here, 12 00:00:24,480 --> 00:00:27,955 and we certainly don't get many pretty lady travelers. 13 00:00:29,258 --> 00:00:30,862 Hello there. Welcome to the area, 14 00:00:30,862 --> 00:00:33,197 or as I like to call it... the area. 15 00:00:33,198 --> 00:00:35,070 I'm sorry. I thought something would come to me. 16 00:00:35,070 --> 00:00:37,540 Anyway, what brings you h-here? 17 00:00:37,541 --> 00:00:40,713 I'm Sophie, these are my guys. We're mapmakers. 18 00:00:40,714 --> 00:00:42,619 Map... makers. 19 00:00:42,619 --> 00:00:45,088 Have you not heard of maps? They're the next big thing. 20 00:00:45,089 --> 00:00:46,627 They help you find where you're going. 21 00:00:46,627 --> 00:00:48,261 Like, if you needed to get from here to Thebes, 22 00:00:48,262 --> 00:00:50,000 how would you do that? 23 00:00:50,100 --> 00:00:52,269 Well, I'd ask our finder. We have this guy Casey. 24 00:00:52,270 --> 00:00:54,710 His whole job is just knowing how to get places. 25 00:00:54,710 --> 00:00:56,144 He's not that great, though, 26 00:00:56,145 --> 00:00:57,479 unless you're looking for a brothel. 27 00:00:57,480 --> 00:00:59,116 Oh, we have a great finder--Loretta. 28 00:00:59,117 --> 00:01:00,720 Every city has a finder. 29 00:01:00,721 --> 00:01:02,857 Well, every city's finder is about to kill themselves 30 00:01:02,858 --> 00:01:04,928 because this is a map. 31 00:01:04,929 --> 00:01:07,134 See? It shows mountains, rivers, paths, 32 00:01:07,134 --> 00:01:09,237 and of course all the important cities. 33 00:01:09,238 --> 00:01:11,374 And there we are. We're an important city! 34 00:01:11,375 --> 00:01:14,115 I'm an important king! Oh, shame. 35 00:01:14,115 --> 00:01:16,017 Looks like Killassas didn't make it this time. 36 00:01:16,018 --> 00:01:18,454 I understand, but they've come so far. 37 00:01:18,455 --> 00:01:20,960 - Oh, Killassas is on there. - That's not Krapopolis? 38 00:01:20,961 --> 00:01:22,566 No. Krapopolis isn't on the map. 39 00:01:22,566 --> 00:01:25,035 And Killassas is?! It's barely a city! 40 00:01:25,036 --> 00:01:26,673 No offense. 41 00:01:26,673 --> 00:01:28,677 Hey. I'm selling these things. To get on the map, 42 00:01:28,677 --> 00:01:30,846 a city has to have something a traveler's gonna care about. 43 00:01:30,847 --> 00:01:32,216 We're a democracy! 44 00:01:32,217 --> 00:01:33,719 They're a city of cannibals! 45 00:01:33,720 --> 00:01:35,321 Again, no offense. 46 00:01:35,322 --> 00:01:37,392 It's the "no offense" that's starting to bug me. 47 00:01:37,393 --> 00:01:39,564 City of cannibals is exactly the kind of thing 48 00:01:39,565 --> 00:01:42,002 a traveler wants on the map so they can steer clear. 49 00:01:42,003 --> 00:01:43,741 What about your city is as useful to know 50 00:01:43,741 --> 00:01:45,375 as "They eat people here"? 51 00:01:45,376 --> 00:01:47,415 We have a very nice place to poo. 52 00:01:47,415 --> 00:01:49,116 Everywhere has a nice place to poo. 53 00:01:49,117 --> 00:01:50,954 Do you have a restaurant? 54 00:01:50,955 --> 00:01:52,557 - We could. - Tell you what. 55 00:01:52,558 --> 00:01:54,193 We're coming back around in a few days. 56 00:01:54,194 --> 00:01:55,997 If you've got a decent restaurant by then, 57 00:01:55,998 --> 00:01:57,298 I'll put you on the map. 58 00:01:57,299 --> 00:02:00,005 - Restaurant. - Hey. could you take 59 00:02:00,006 --> 00:02:01,641 our city off the map? 60 00:02:01,642 --> 00:02:04,181 - Travelers are 60% of our diet. - Oh, I don't know. 61 00:02:04,181 --> 00:02:06,052 Travelers really should be warned about-- 62 00:02:06,052 --> 00:02:07,920 please remove us, or we'll eat you. 63 00:02:07,921 --> 00:02:09,659 Will do! 64 00:02:26,225 --> 00:02:28,195 ♪ Huh huh huh huh 65 00:02:28,196 --> 00:02:32,404 ♪ Huh huh huh whoo 66 00:02:36,078 --> 00:02:37,479 It's called a map, 67 00:02:37,480 --> 00:02:39,183 and it shows where everything is. 68 00:02:39,184 --> 00:02:40,855 Casey's gonna kill himself. 69 00:02:40,855 --> 00:02:42,523 That's the least of our problems. 70 00:02:42,524 --> 00:02:44,561 I didn't mean that, Casey. We'll find you another job. 71 00:02:44,562 --> 00:02:45,662 Ohh. 72 00:02:45,663 --> 00:02:47,769 Why is it the least of our problems? 73 00:02:47,769 --> 00:02:49,771 Because it shows every significant city 74 00:02:49,772 --> 00:02:51,109 in the modern world 75 00:02:51,209 --> 00:02:52,578 with the notable exception of mine. 76 00:02:52,578 --> 00:02:54,046 You mean ours. 77 00:02:54,047 --> 00:02:55,114 I don't think mortals should know 78 00:02:55,115 --> 00:02:56,483 where things are. 79 00:02:56,484 --> 00:02:58,256 It's more fun to watch them wander. 80 00:02:58,256 --> 00:02:59,391 The cities who don't get on this thing are 81 00:02:59,391 --> 00:03:00,695 going to be left in the dust. 82 00:03:00,695 --> 00:03:01,997 I have to be on it! 83 00:03:01,997 --> 00:03:03,464 - We. - Look Kissuria's a city 84 00:03:03,465 --> 00:03:05,270 you can't even get to, and it's on the map. 85 00:03:05,270 --> 00:03:07,508 Wait, that's where Kissuria is? 86 00:03:07,508 --> 00:03:09,276 Past the Ice Mountains of Death all the way 87 00:03:09,277 --> 00:03:11,347 on the other side of the Uncrossable Chasm? 88 00:03:11,348 --> 00:03:13,017 I always thought it was reachable. 89 00:03:13,018 --> 00:03:14,556 Well, now you know it's not, 90 00:03:14,556 --> 00:03:16,291 but what you don't know, looking at this map, 91 00:03:16,292 --> 00:03:18,262 is that my city exists. 92 00:03:18,262 --> 00:03:20,032 - Our city. - And that's why we're 93 00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,267 opening a restaurant. 94 00:03:21,268 --> 00:03:22,672 A restaurant? 95 00:03:22,672 --> 00:03:24,139 The thing where humans go to eat 96 00:03:24,140 --> 00:03:25,778 as if they're worth serving food to? 97 00:03:25,778 --> 00:03:27,747 I wouldn't be caught dead in a restaurant. 98 00:03:27,748 --> 00:03:29,684 I've been caught dead in several. 99 00:03:29,685 --> 00:03:31,955 Well, we need a restaurant to get on the map, 100 00:03:31,956 --> 00:03:33,458 and Hippo's gonna be our chef. 101 00:03:33,459 --> 00:03:35,430 Me?! I'm not cooking for people! 102 00:03:35,430 --> 00:03:37,666 Oh, I forgot. You only care about yourself. 103 00:03:37,667 --> 00:03:38,903 Correct. 104 00:03:38,904 --> 00:03:40,305 Why did I think that would work? 105 00:03:40,306 --> 00:03:41,677 Come on! For once in your life, 106 00:03:41,677 --> 00:03:43,411 do something for the good of the city. 107 00:03:43,412 --> 00:03:45,552 Oh. The city you can't stop calling your city? 108 00:03:45,552 --> 00:03:47,185 What is there, some girl, 109 00:03:47,186 --> 00:03:48,558 some girl you're trying to impress? 110 00:03:48,558 --> 00:03:50,060 If you're not going to cook simply 111 00:03:50,060 --> 00:03:51,295 to make other people happy, 112 00:03:51,295 --> 00:03:52,830 how about I appeal to your ego? 113 00:03:52,831 --> 00:03:56,236 What if someone could be the best at cooking? 114 00:03:56,237 --> 00:03:58,778 Well, obviously, it would be me. 115 00:03:58,778 --> 00:04:00,146 - Prove it. - I will! 116 00:04:00,146 --> 00:04:01,717 And I know you just played me, 117 00:04:01,717 --> 00:04:04,587 but well played because I am completely in. 118 00:04:04,588 --> 00:04:06,158 Guess we've got ourselves a restaurant. 119 00:04:06,158 --> 00:04:07,928 I guess we have. 120 00:04:09,332 --> 00:04:10,332 What the hell is this? 121 00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:11,935 Spike, what is this? 122 00:04:11,936 --> 00:04:13,672 They saw the damn map. 123 00:04:13,673 --> 00:04:16,045 They're celebrating because those baby-eating bastards 124 00:04:16,045 --> 00:04:17,916 from Kissuria can't invade us. 125 00:04:17,916 --> 00:04:19,483 End of an era, huh? 126 00:04:19,484 --> 00:04:21,790 All my life, I've been preparing to be invaded 127 00:04:21,790 --> 00:04:23,359 by the Kissurians. 128 00:04:23,359 --> 00:04:25,563 I was raised on stories about those animals, 129 00:04:25,564 --> 00:04:28,100 how they eat babies, how they chop off your fingers 130 00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:30,038 one by one and feed them to your baby 131 00:04:30,039 --> 00:04:31,575 and then still eat the baby. 132 00:04:31,576 --> 00:04:33,312 Don't forget the butt sewing. 133 00:04:33,312 --> 00:04:35,750 The most twisted, vile battlefield torture 134 00:04:35,751 --> 00:04:38,454 ever conceived-- sewing your butt closed 135 00:04:38,455 --> 00:04:40,993 and then force feeding you till you explode? 136 00:04:40,994 --> 00:04:44,299 Hey, guys! We don't need our butt guards anymore. 137 00:04:44,300 --> 00:04:45,938 Throw them on the fire! 138 00:04:47,642 --> 00:04:49,176 Look at them, goofing around, 139 00:04:49,177 --> 00:04:50,546 not a care in the world. 140 00:04:50,547 --> 00:04:52,384 I can't let that happen to me. 141 00:04:52,384 --> 00:04:54,623 I am keeping this butt guard and these finger holders 142 00:04:54,623 --> 00:04:57,529 until I have properly killed those Kissurian bastards 143 00:04:57,529 --> 00:04:59,098 on a field of battle! 144 00:04:59,098 --> 00:05:00,533 Hell, yeah! I'm in! 145 00:05:00,534 --> 00:05:02,572 Let's go kick some ass! 146 00:05:06,379 --> 00:05:10,118 Hello, and welcome to Ty's Man Woman Table Chairs Food. 147 00:05:10,119 --> 00:05:11,821 Catchy name. 148 00:05:11,822 --> 00:05:13,758 Have you eaten in a restaurant before? 149 00:05:13,759 --> 00:05:16,363 We've never eaten indoors before. 150 00:05:16,364 --> 00:05:19,336 Well, you're in for a treat. 151 00:05:19,337 --> 00:05:20,675 Let me tell you how it works. 152 00:05:20,675 --> 00:05:22,378 You order food, we cook it. 153 00:05:22,378 --> 00:05:23,712 It's really that simple. 154 00:05:23,713 --> 00:05:25,384 - Do we have to kill it? - Nope. 155 00:05:25,384 --> 00:05:26,818 - Gut it? - Nope. 156 00:05:26,819 --> 00:05:29,022 Skin it, bleed it, make it into chunks? 157 00:05:29,023 --> 00:05:30,659 Nope! We do all that for you. 158 00:05:30,660 --> 00:05:33,331 Should be called Ty's Kill Gut Skin Bleed 159 00:05:33,332 --> 00:05:36,437 Man Woman Table Chairs Food Chunks Eat. 160 00:05:36,438 --> 00:05:38,374 We will certainly take a look at that. 161 00:05:38,375 --> 00:05:40,413 So I can order anything? 162 00:05:40,413 --> 00:05:42,148 No. I should have been more specific. 163 00:05:42,149 --> 00:05:44,155 You can order any amount of one thing, 164 00:05:44,155 --> 00:05:46,123 and that thing is chicken, 165 00:05:46,124 --> 00:05:48,027 and the amount can't be too much. 166 00:05:48,028 --> 00:05:51,133 Great. We'll have one. 167 00:05:51,134 --> 00:05:52,839 Hippo, we've got our first customers, 168 00:05:52,839 --> 00:05:54,975 and they will have one delicious chicken. 169 00:05:54,976 --> 00:05:58,248 Chicken is child's play. Every cook can make chicken. 170 00:05:58,249 --> 00:06:00,287 I'm making octopus. 171 00:06:00,287 --> 00:06:02,557 Octopus? Humans don't eat octopus. 172 00:06:02,558 --> 00:06:04,928 You should. All they talk about is eating you. 173 00:06:04,929 --> 00:06:06,330 OK. Noted. 174 00:06:06,331 --> 00:06:08,100 Seriously, they have 17 different words 175 00:06:08,101 --> 00:06:09,738 for human meat. 176 00:06:09,739 --> 00:06:11,576 They're crossbreeding themselves to become giant. 177 00:06:11,576 --> 00:06:13,243 Point taken, but this is just supposed to be 178 00:06:13,244 --> 00:06:14,680 a simple, functioning restaurant. 179 00:06:14,681 --> 00:06:17,485 Wrong! It's a test of my genius. 180 00:06:17,486 --> 00:06:19,456 I tenderized this thing precisely 181 00:06:19,457 --> 00:06:20,993 for the best mouthfeel. 182 00:06:20,994 --> 00:06:23,297 I seared it the perfect amount for caramelizing, 183 00:06:23,298 --> 00:06:25,035 and here--lemon juice. 184 00:06:25,036 --> 00:06:26,537 Enhances the flavor. 185 00:06:26,538 --> 00:06:28,107 This is scientifically delicious. 186 00:06:28,108 --> 00:06:29,779 Taste. 187 00:06:31,684 --> 00:06:34,888 Oh! Oh, Hippo. You're a genius. 188 00:06:34,889 --> 00:06:36,459 I just said that. 189 00:06:36,459 --> 00:06:38,427 What is that thing your eyes are doing? 190 00:06:38,428 --> 00:06:40,332 Showing pleasure? 191 00:06:40,333 --> 00:06:42,739 Yeah, but why does it feel good to me? 192 00:06:42,739 --> 00:06:45,274 Because there's a simple joy in making people happy? 193 00:06:45,275 --> 00:06:47,011 That can't be it. Wait a minute. 194 00:06:47,012 --> 00:06:49,484 The satisfaction of the eater is how I can measure 195 00:06:49,484 --> 00:06:51,086 my greatness! 196 00:06:51,087 --> 00:06:54,929 You think the people out there will make the same face? 197 00:06:54,929 --> 00:06:58,203 Mmm! Oh, my God. 198 00:06:58,203 --> 00:07:00,338 Mmm! 199 00:07:00,339 --> 00:07:01,610 Feels good, right? 200 00:07:01,610 --> 00:07:03,612 Feels great! Let's go, people. 201 00:07:03,613 --> 00:07:05,248 Fire up the grill! 202 00:07:05,249 --> 00:07:07,418 I got an idea for a new oyster dish! 203 00:07:07,419 --> 00:07:09,122 Do they hate humans, too? 204 00:07:09,123 --> 00:07:10,425 Hmm. Let me think. 205 00:07:10,426 --> 00:07:11,594 Do you steal their jewelry? 206 00:07:11,595 --> 00:07:14,067 All right! Let's start shucking! 207 00:07:17,742 --> 00:07:19,944 Hi. Welcome to Ty's Man Woman 208 00:07:19,945 --> 00:07:21,480 Table Chairs Food. 209 00:07:21,481 --> 00:07:23,618 The branding is all wrong, but the food. 210 00:07:23,619 --> 00:07:25,488 He does a thing with octopus. 211 00:07:25,489 --> 00:07:26,924 Trust me. 212 00:07:26,925 --> 00:07:28,795 You need to put octopus on the sign. 213 00:07:28,796 --> 00:07:30,632 Can I be in charge of the name, please? 214 00:07:30,633 --> 00:07:32,537 Wait. They kill it and gut it, too? 215 00:07:32,538 --> 00:07:36,410 Yeah. The sign is very misleading. 216 00:07:36,411 --> 00:07:38,414 More turmeric. 217 00:07:38,415 --> 00:07:39,953 Getting there. 218 00:07:39,953 --> 00:07:41,320 Start over! 219 00:07:41,321 --> 00:07:42,823 Chef, I made this chicken. 220 00:07:42,824 --> 00:07:44,459 Be honest. What do you think? 221 00:07:44,460 --> 00:07:45,696 What is it? Boiled? 222 00:07:45,697 --> 00:07:47,198 And you didn't even pluck it! 223 00:07:47,199 --> 00:07:48,501 Casey, you're fired. 224 00:07:48,502 --> 00:07:51,041 Please. I can't lose another job. 225 00:07:51,041 --> 00:07:53,845 Then stay, but don't touch anything. 226 00:07:53,846 --> 00:07:55,248 Hello, hello, hello. 227 00:07:55,249 --> 00:07:56,484 Great business out there. 228 00:07:56,485 --> 00:07:57,554 How's it going back here? 229 00:07:57,555 --> 00:08:00,258 Ty, I'm crushing this. 230 00:08:00,259 --> 00:08:01,728 It's like with science 231 00:08:01,729 --> 00:08:03,732 I make something, and it's done, 232 00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:06,807 but with food, what I'm making is deliciousness, 233 00:08:06,807 --> 00:08:08,509 and there's no upper limit to that, 234 00:08:08,510 --> 00:08:11,015 or if there is, I intend to find it. 235 00:08:11,015 --> 00:08:12,482 That's why we do it! 236 00:08:12,483 --> 00:08:14,254 So anyway, table 8 would like the octopus dish 237 00:08:14,254 --> 00:08:15,956 - from yesterday. - No, no, no. 238 00:08:15,957 --> 00:08:18,429 The octopus dish from yesterday won't enthrall them 239 00:08:18,429 --> 00:08:19,699 like it did yesterday. 240 00:08:19,699 --> 00:08:21,133 I'm sure they'll be fine with it. 241 00:08:21,134 --> 00:08:23,304 I just told you I'm not working for fine. 242 00:08:23,305 --> 00:08:24,841 I'm working for better than anything, 243 00:08:24,842 --> 00:08:26,978 and better than anything keeps getting redefined 244 00:08:26,979 --> 00:08:28,548 every time I cook. 245 00:08:28,549 --> 00:08:30,452 I worry that redefining greatness is getting away 246 00:08:30,453 --> 00:08:31,888 from the original mission. 247 00:08:31,889 --> 00:08:33,859 We only need a functioning restaurant 248 00:08:33,860 --> 00:08:36,298 - to get on the map. - Tut, tut, tut. 249 00:08:40,307 --> 00:08:41,844 Mmm! 250 00:08:41,844 --> 00:08:43,444 They will get their food, they will make the face, 251 00:08:43,445 --> 00:08:45,081 I will be the best, you will be happy. 252 00:08:45,082 --> 00:08:47,187 OK. Just don't take too long to cook the food. 253 00:08:47,187 --> 00:08:48,621 These people will eat worms. 254 00:08:48,622 --> 00:08:50,728 And if they do, they will be the greatest, 255 00:08:50,728 --> 00:08:54,302 most exquisitely prepared worms anyone has ever tasted. 256 00:08:54,302 --> 00:08:55,870 I don't doubt that. 257 00:08:55,871 --> 00:08:58,875 ♪ And Deliria's ass is the finest ass ♪ 258 00:08:58,876 --> 00:09:00,846 ♪ That the world has ever seen 259 00:09:00,847 --> 00:09:03,484 ♪ You could bounce a coin off a perfect little tushy ♪ 260 00:09:03,485 --> 00:09:06,392 Darling, have you heard? Hippo is quite the chef. 261 00:09:06,392 --> 00:09:09,062 The line at the restaurant reaches all around the block. 262 00:09:09,063 --> 00:09:11,267 In other news, we have blocks now. 263 00:09:11,268 --> 00:09:13,472 Interesting, but I already said 264 00:09:13,472 --> 00:09:14,707 I had no interest. 265 00:09:14,708 --> 00:09:16,578 I'm on record. 266 00:09:16,579 --> 00:09:18,414 ♪ She already said she could not care less ♪ 267 00:09:18,415 --> 00:09:21,221 ♪ But now she's curious about it ♪ 268 00:09:22,626 --> 00:09:25,228 Ow! Why a cat?! You know I'm allergic. 269 00:09:25,229 --> 00:09:27,233 This is over the top! 270 00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:28,502 There has to be a give and take. 271 00:09:28,503 --> 00:09:30,171 Haven't I earned that? 272 00:09:30,172 --> 00:09:31,874 Now I'm all the way outside, 273 00:09:31,875 --> 00:09:34,981 and both of my hands are cats? Why?! 274 00:09:36,051 --> 00:09:37,387 What if we went to the restaurant 275 00:09:37,487 --> 00:09:38,858 but not as ourselves? 276 00:09:38,858 --> 00:09:41,326 I'm always up for some roleplay. 277 00:09:41,327 --> 00:09:42,797 Ooh. look at us. 278 00:09:42,798 --> 00:09:44,700 I'm Cato, a potter. 279 00:09:44,701 --> 00:09:47,439 And I'm Dolores, a milkmaid. 280 00:09:47,440 --> 00:09:49,044 And we're not married 281 00:09:49,044 --> 00:09:51,413 Ooh. We're playing with fire, aren't we? 282 00:09:51,414 --> 00:09:53,685 Ooh! If my husband were to find out. 283 00:09:53,686 --> 00:09:57,191 Would he fly into a violent rage? 284 00:09:57,192 --> 00:09:59,698 We're gonna have to try less sexy disguises, 285 00:09:59,699 --> 00:10:02,705 or we'll never make it to the restaurant. 286 00:10:09,185 --> 00:10:10,986 Aah! 287 00:10:10,987 --> 00:10:12,124 Unh! 288 00:10:12,124 --> 00:10:14,294 Aah! Oof! 289 00:10:22,612 --> 00:10:24,147 No! 290 00:10:37,976 --> 00:10:38,942 Huh? 291 00:10:38,943 --> 00:10:41,082 This is the Uncrossable Chasm? 292 00:10:41,082 --> 00:10:43,518 It's way more uncrossable than I thought. 293 00:10:43,519 --> 00:10:47,962 Damn it! 294 00:10:47,962 --> 00:10:50,601 Wait. Are you an echo or a person? 295 00:10:50,701 --> 00:10:53,204 Wait. Are you an echo or a person? 296 00:10:53,205 --> 00:10:54,976 No, wait. You go first. 297 00:10:54,976 --> 00:10:57,281 No, I want to go first. 298 00:10:57,281 --> 00:10:59,115 That's what I--hey! 299 00:10:59,116 --> 00:11:03,092 I am Babak of the Kissurian people. 300 00:11:03,092 --> 00:11:06,733 I am Stupendous of Krapopolis. 301 00:11:06,733 --> 00:11:09,304 - We got maps. - So did we. 302 00:11:09,304 --> 00:11:11,273 I came here to kick your ass! 303 00:11:11,274 --> 00:11:13,846 Same. I had hoped the Uncrossable Chasm 304 00:11:13,847 --> 00:11:15,818 was a hyperbolic nickname. 305 00:11:15,818 --> 00:11:18,254 Me, too. Like the Bottomless Lake. 306 00:11:18,255 --> 00:11:22,228 No, I have been there. That thing is bottomless. 307 00:11:22,229 --> 00:11:26,505 Huh. Well, I'm not leaving without kicking your ass. 308 00:11:26,506 --> 00:11:28,576 Ohh-- 309 00:11:28,576 --> 00:11:31,079 - We should build a bridge. - Agreed, 310 00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:33,119 and this is not gonna be one of those things 311 00:11:33,119 --> 00:11:35,321 where we realize we work better together. 312 00:11:35,322 --> 00:11:36,758 Absolutely not. 313 00:11:36,759 --> 00:11:39,464 Once the bridge is built, you die. 314 00:11:41,035 --> 00:11:43,607 Oh, wow! The joint is jumping. 315 00:11:43,607 --> 00:11:45,611 Welcome to Ty's Man Woman Table Chairs 316 00:11:45,611 --> 00:11:47,011 Different Types of Food. 317 00:11:47,012 --> 00:11:48,881 There's just a bit of a wait. 318 00:11:48,882 --> 00:11:51,921 Should be called Ty's Man Woman Wait Table Chairs Diff-- 319 00:11:51,922 --> 00:11:53,759 Can I be in charge of the name, please? 320 00:11:53,760 --> 00:11:55,562 Fine. Oh, there's some lady 321 00:11:55,563 --> 00:11:57,098 back there who says she's a mapmaker. 322 00:11:57,099 --> 00:12:00,237 She's here? Sophie, welcome to my restaurant. 323 00:12:00,238 --> 00:12:02,943 Is it even a restaurant? So far, it's just a line. 324 00:12:02,944 --> 00:12:04,514 It's a restaurant! 325 00:12:04,515 --> 00:12:05,749 We're just working out a few kinks. 326 00:12:05,750 --> 00:12:07,187 You're gonna love it, though. 327 00:12:07,187 --> 00:12:08,955 I'll be the judge of that, though. 328 00:12:08,956 --> 00:12:10,659 ♪ Love our playful banter 329 00:12:10,660 --> 00:12:12,497 Just want food. 330 00:12:20,413 --> 00:12:24,486 - Aah! - Arrr! 331 00:12:24,487 --> 00:12:29,028 I will remove your head and parade it around my city! 332 00:12:29,029 --> 00:12:30,899 I'll put your corpse on a pole 333 00:12:30,900 --> 00:12:33,070 and use strings to move your arms and mouth 334 00:12:33,071 --> 00:12:35,676 and make it seem like you're saying bad things. 335 00:12:35,677 --> 00:12:37,145 Like what? 336 00:12:37,146 --> 00:12:39,785 Like "Hi. I'm Babak, and I eat babies." 337 00:12:41,355 --> 00:12:42,858 Why would I eat babies? 338 00:12:42,958 --> 00:12:45,330 You Krapopolites are the baby eaters. 339 00:12:45,330 --> 00:12:47,566 That's a lie! We fight with honor. 340 00:12:47,567 --> 00:12:50,073 I love that sword! 341 00:12:53,446 --> 00:12:56,985 You're the ones who sew people's butts closed like cowards. 342 00:12:56,986 --> 00:12:59,992 We did that one or two times as a joke. 343 00:12:59,992 --> 00:13:02,930 Meanwhile, you people do nothing but suck out 344 00:13:02,931 --> 00:13:07,373 your enemies' eyeballs and feed them to your babies. 345 00:13:07,373 --> 00:13:09,345 I strongly reprimanded the soldier 346 00:13:09,445 --> 00:13:12,950 - who did that. - Aah! 347 00:13:12,951 --> 00:13:14,419 - Wait, wait. - What? 348 00:13:14,420 --> 00:13:16,456 You want to kiss me before I kill you? 349 00:13:16,457 --> 00:13:17,828 That ain't happening. 350 00:13:17,828 --> 00:13:19,632 No. Why would I want to kiss you? 351 00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:21,268 It happens more often than you think. 352 00:13:21,268 --> 00:13:23,540 Sometimes, signals get crossed in the brain. 353 00:13:23,540 --> 00:13:24,974 No. I--I can see that. 354 00:13:24,975 --> 00:13:26,980 No. The reason I said wait is 355 00:13:26,980 --> 00:13:29,348 does anyone know you're here? 356 00:13:29,349 --> 00:13:30,754 - No. - Look. 357 00:13:30,854 --> 00:13:32,356 You're gonna kill me, which is fine. 358 00:13:32,356 --> 00:13:33,860 I accept that. 359 00:13:33,860 --> 00:13:35,531 Then I fall into the Uncrossable Chasm, 360 00:13:35,531 --> 00:13:40,373 so I die down there, but I got your leg pretty good. 361 00:13:40,373 --> 00:13:43,514 You won't make it back across those mountains. 362 00:13:43,614 --> 00:13:45,816 You die on an ice shelf somewhere, 363 00:13:45,817 --> 00:13:47,318 and then what are we? 364 00:13:47,319 --> 00:13:49,657 A couple of dead fools who died in a place 365 00:13:49,658 --> 00:13:51,561 no one's ever gonna go to. 366 00:13:51,562 --> 00:13:54,502 Frigging maps. Get up here! 367 00:13:57,274 --> 00:13:59,342 It was gonna be so cool watching you 368 00:13:59,343 --> 00:14:00,845 fall all that way. 369 00:14:00,846 --> 00:14:03,284 I would have screamed all the way down for you. 370 00:14:03,285 --> 00:14:09,364 Aaaaaaaaah! 371 00:14:14,508 --> 00:14:16,410 Don't rub it in. 372 00:14:16,411 --> 00:14:17,780 We can do this. 373 00:14:17,781 --> 00:14:18,982 We just have to come up with the most 374 00:14:18,983 --> 00:14:21,254 unsexy personas imaginable. 375 00:14:21,254 --> 00:14:23,224 Let's try this. 376 00:14:23,225 --> 00:14:25,862 I'm Sol, a plain old man. 377 00:14:25,863 --> 00:14:28,935 I'm married to my job, which is counting beans. 378 00:14:28,936 --> 00:14:30,774 And I'm Helen. 379 00:14:30,774 --> 00:14:33,344 I have severe body odor and a stump for a leg. 380 00:14:33,345 --> 00:14:35,381 How big of a stump? 381 00:14:35,382 --> 00:14:37,889 Why don't you find out, Mr. Bean Counter? 382 00:14:39,491 --> 00:14:41,260 I'm an absolute douchebag 383 00:14:41,261 --> 00:14:44,901 named Money Man with disgustingly long toenails. 384 00:14:44,902 --> 00:14:47,407 Ohh! My top 3 weaknesses. 385 00:14:49,111 --> 00:14:51,547 - I'm a jellyfish. - I'm dead. 386 00:14:51,548 --> 00:14:53,886 How dead? No wrong answers. 387 00:14:55,256 --> 00:14:56,827 Well, I'm beginning to think that we may 388 00:14:56,827 --> 00:14:58,830 never taste Hippo's food. 389 00:14:58,830 --> 00:15:01,033 Oh, roleplay is simply too stimulating. 390 00:15:01,034 --> 00:15:03,304 I may just have to swallow my pride and go as myself. 391 00:15:03,305 --> 00:15:05,040 ♪ She's swallowing her pride because ♪ 392 00:15:05,041 --> 00:15:06,476 ♪ The roleplay was too sexy 393 00:15:06,477 --> 00:15:09,050 Who said you could watch, not sing. 394 00:15:09,050 --> 00:15:10,821 Hippo, she's here, the map lady. 395 00:15:10,821 --> 00:15:12,923 We need to get moving. Hippo? 396 00:15:12,924 --> 00:15:14,761 He's been like this for an hour. 397 00:15:14,762 --> 00:15:16,498 Brother, brother, what's going on here? 398 00:15:16,498 --> 00:15:19,068 I'm just trying to figure out a bay leaf. 399 00:15:19,069 --> 00:15:21,941 Hippo, no. Bay leaves are already figured out. 400 00:15:21,942 --> 00:15:23,614 They're leaves of bay. 401 00:15:23,614 --> 00:15:25,682 Chef, table 6 is still waiting on the salmon. 402 00:15:25,683 --> 00:15:27,719 - Is it ready? - Is it ready? 403 00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:29,823 Let's find out. 404 00:15:29,824 --> 00:15:32,161 No. It's Average. 405 00:15:32,162 --> 00:15:35,001 Average is good, and good is torture. 406 00:15:35,002 --> 00:15:36,270 Then torture yourself! 407 00:15:36,271 --> 00:15:38,208 Fine. Casey, get the salmon out 408 00:15:38,208 --> 00:15:40,545 of the garbage and serve it up. 409 00:15:40,546 --> 00:15:43,218 Is it OK if there's a couple bites missing? 410 00:15:48,362 --> 00:15:51,033 Hello again, and welcome to Ty's, just Ty's. 411 00:15:51,034 --> 00:15:52,803 Your server then explains the concept 412 00:15:52,804 --> 00:15:54,172 once you've sat down. 413 00:15:54,173 --> 00:15:56,209 - I like the name. - You're the first one. 414 00:15:56,210 --> 00:15:58,113 Look at that. Even gods eat here. 415 00:15:58,114 --> 00:16:00,117 Tell me, son, is this one of those places 416 00:16:00,118 --> 00:16:01,988 with peanut shells on the floor? 417 00:16:01,989 --> 00:16:03,625 It could be. Excellent because 418 00:16:03,626 --> 00:16:07,198 on the floor in my scat are peanut shells. 419 00:16:07,199 --> 00:16:08,768 I could come back. 420 00:16:08,769 --> 00:16:10,706 It seems like you're still working out the kinks. 421 00:16:10,707 --> 00:16:12,107 No, no, no. Don't leave. 422 00:16:12,108 --> 00:16:13,512 I'll seat you in just a second. 423 00:16:13,513 --> 00:16:15,113 Mum, Dad, do not turn this into a place 424 00:16:15,114 --> 00:16:16,684 where people don't want to eat. 425 00:16:16,685 --> 00:16:18,487 Why not? Couldn't get any worse. 426 00:16:18,488 --> 00:16:21,059 He's got me cooking crap chickens for crap people. 427 00:16:21,060 --> 00:16:23,097 I thought you were cooking food worthy of a god. 428 00:16:23,098 --> 00:16:25,401 I was getting there, but he stopped me. 429 00:16:25,402 --> 00:16:28,842 Screw him. Make me something that would blow my mind. 430 00:16:28,843 --> 00:16:30,244 I will! 431 00:16:30,245 --> 00:16:31,881 Can I just have a piece of chicken? 432 00:16:31,882 --> 00:16:33,551 I'm so hungry. I skipped breakfast. 433 00:16:33,552 --> 00:16:39,362 No. No one eats until I have pleased this customer. 434 00:16:39,363 --> 00:16:41,299 Mother, can I ask you the biggest of favors? 435 00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:42,870 Could you just quickly tell Hippo that he's 436 00:16:42,871 --> 00:16:44,306 blown your mind, and be sure to 437 00:16:44,307 --> 00:16:45,608 roll your eyes back in your head. 438 00:16:45,609 --> 00:16:47,011 He likes that. 439 00:16:47,012 --> 00:16:48,850 If he blows my mind, I'll let him know. 440 00:16:50,921 --> 00:16:52,321 Hmm. Interesting. 441 00:16:52,322 --> 00:16:54,158 Not the best thing you ever had? 442 00:16:54,159 --> 00:16:55,531 Of course not. 443 00:16:58,068 --> 00:16:59,704 It's good for humans or dogs. 444 00:16:59,705 --> 00:17:01,576 I can't remember who eats better. 445 00:17:05,850 --> 00:17:07,120 Hmm. Pleasant. 446 00:17:07,120 --> 00:17:09,090 Pleasant is the baseline! 447 00:17:10,895 --> 00:17:12,897 Hippo, the map lady, she's gonna leave. 448 00:17:12,898 --> 00:17:14,602 Thinking about it. 449 00:17:24,555 --> 00:17:28,194 It's... quite good for what it is. 450 00:17:28,195 --> 00:17:29,764 Hippo, take the win. 451 00:17:29,765 --> 00:17:32,503 I can't. I can't do it! 452 00:17:32,504 --> 00:17:36,209 I'm a fraud! I'm an absolute fraud! 453 00:17:36,210 --> 00:17:38,748 Why did I ever think I could be the best at cooking? 454 00:17:38,749 --> 00:17:40,619 - Mmm! - Mmm! 455 00:17:40,620 --> 00:17:41,754 Ha ha ha! 456 00:17:41,755 --> 00:17:43,323 Everyone, out! 457 00:17:43,324 --> 00:17:46,163 A delight from start to finish! We'll dine again! 458 00:17:46,164 --> 00:17:49,570 I said out! Get out! 459 00:17:49,571 --> 00:17:50,840 Rah! 460 00:17:53,178 --> 00:17:55,013 I think I've seen what I need to see. 461 00:17:55,014 --> 00:17:57,084 Aah! 462 00:17:57,085 --> 00:17:58,521 Thank you for dining at Ty's 463 00:17:58,522 --> 00:18:02,028 Walk In Sit Down Don't Eat Run Away. 464 00:18:02,029 --> 00:18:03,598 I hate the mapped world. 465 00:18:03,599 --> 00:18:06,136 It used to be you'd go off on an adventure. 466 00:18:06,137 --> 00:18:07,740 You wouldn't know what you'd find 467 00:18:07,741 --> 00:18:09,442 or who you'd have to kill. 468 00:18:09,443 --> 00:18:11,848 Yeah, used to be anyone could show up 469 00:18:11,849 --> 00:18:13,450 at your doorstep, anyone? 470 00:18:13,451 --> 00:18:15,922 My whole army was driven by the possibility 471 00:18:15,923 --> 00:18:17,258 of your invasion. 472 00:18:17,259 --> 00:18:19,663 - Us, too. - That's why I came here. 473 00:18:19,664 --> 00:18:22,303 What I really wanted to fight was that map, 474 00:18:22,303 --> 00:18:24,305 but I guess the map won. 475 00:18:24,306 --> 00:18:27,278 Wait, but now the map is wrong. 476 00:18:27,279 --> 00:18:30,652 This is supposed to be the Uncrossable Chasm, 477 00:18:30,653 --> 00:18:32,221 but now it's covered 478 00:18:32,222 --> 00:18:34,559 by the Dangerous but Doable Bridge. 479 00:18:34,560 --> 00:18:37,966 You go home and tell your people that map is wrong. 480 00:18:37,967 --> 00:18:39,537 Tell them we're coming, 481 00:18:39,538 --> 00:18:42,041 and our babies are hungry for eyeballs. 482 00:18:42,042 --> 00:18:45,215 - Ha ha ha! - Ha ha ha! 483 00:18:46,752 --> 00:18:49,122 Wait. You think we have enough battle scars? 484 00:18:49,123 --> 00:18:50,692 It's got to be realistic. 485 00:18:50,693 --> 00:18:53,129 Oh, right. You want to just take this eyeball? 486 00:18:53,130 --> 00:18:55,133 - Sure. - You want to sew my butt shut? 487 00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:59,443 I'd like that. I'd like that very much. 488 00:19:00,581 --> 00:19:02,414 - You did this to me. - I did? 489 00:19:02,415 --> 00:19:04,385 You let me believe that cooking 490 00:19:04,386 --> 00:19:06,156 could be scientifically measurable. 491 00:19:06,157 --> 00:19:07,693 That's because I couldn't get you to just cook 492 00:19:07,694 --> 00:19:09,228 for the sheer pleasure of doing something 493 00:19:09,229 --> 00:19:10,497 for someone else. 494 00:19:10,498 --> 00:19:12,234 Altruism? There's no such thing. 495 00:19:12,235 --> 00:19:14,405 Helping other people is always self-serving. 496 00:19:14,406 --> 00:19:16,342 I built this city for other people, 497 00:19:16,343 --> 00:19:18,815 and I wanted a restaurant for the good of the people. 498 00:19:18,816 --> 00:19:23,223 Oh, a restaurant called Ty's, where I did all the work? 499 00:19:23,224 --> 00:19:24,793 Branding was important! 500 00:19:24,794 --> 00:19:26,731 You didn't build this city to help people, Ty. 501 00:19:26,732 --> 00:19:29,368 You built it to be the guy who helped people. 502 00:19:29,369 --> 00:19:31,673 The city was my penis, wasn't it? 503 00:19:31,674 --> 00:19:33,243 - What?! - No. 504 00:19:33,244 --> 00:19:35,915 I was just saying it's an extension of my ego. 505 00:19:35,916 --> 00:19:37,251 Then say that. 506 00:19:37,252 --> 00:19:39,488 Well, forgive me for being poetic. 507 00:19:39,489 --> 00:19:41,460 Hey, guys. What's so wrong 508 00:19:41,461 --> 00:19:44,365 about helping people for the sake of your own ego? 509 00:19:44,366 --> 00:19:46,470 - Huh? - I mean, you made a city 510 00:19:46,471 --> 00:19:48,808 to get kudos, and you cooked 511 00:19:48,809 --> 00:19:50,678 for the good eye rolls, 512 00:19:50,679 --> 00:19:53,416 but either way, you guys gave me a job, 513 00:19:53,417 --> 00:19:56,189 and I was on the verge of ending it all in a brothel. 514 00:19:56,190 --> 00:19:58,661 I'm just saying good did come out of this, 515 00:19:58,662 --> 00:20:01,367 whether or not it's why you did it. 516 00:20:02,938 --> 00:20:04,438 How do you like the sound 517 00:20:04,439 --> 00:20:08,381 of Casey's Man Woman Eat Chicken Table? 518 00:20:09,752 --> 00:20:12,488 Thanks for coming back. So was that the best 519 00:20:12,489 --> 00:20:14,125 whole, boiled, unplucked chicken 520 00:20:14,126 --> 00:20:16,496 - you've ever had? - First and hopefully last. 521 00:20:16,497 --> 00:20:18,734 So good enough to put us on the map? 522 00:20:18,735 --> 00:20:20,538 Yeah. I'll make a note that Krapopolis has 523 00:20:20,539 --> 00:20:22,408 a restaurant you should definitely avoid... 524 00:20:22,409 --> 00:20:24,045 - Oh. - but a king 525 00:20:24,046 --> 00:20:25,447 who tries real hard. 526 00:20:25,448 --> 00:20:28,153 I'll take the win. Mum, Dad, no! 527 00:20:28,154 --> 00:20:30,959 My name is Sam the Jellyfish. 528 00:20:30,960 --> 00:20:33,398 And I'm Jessica, and I'm dead. 38318

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