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1
00:00:03,305 --> 00:00:06,464
Maybe you wanna come on inside.
2
00:00:08,917 --> 00:00:10,555
-Are you trying to glamour me?
3
00:00:13,417 --> 00:00:14,655
Yes
4
00:00:15,433 --> 00:00:17,437
- That doesn't work on me.
- Why not?
5
00:00:17,790 --> 00:00:19,480
I don't know. It just doesn't.
6
00:00:22,275 --> 00:00:23,640
Is Bill available?
7
00:00:24,986 --> 00:00:26,181
Let her in.
8
00:00:30,194 --> 00:00:33,662
- Diane, let her in.
- Oh, fuck him.
9
00:00:33,888 --> 00:00:34,912
You have.
10
00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:42,074
Advertise your product or brand here
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11
00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:11,736
If y'all excuse me
and Bill a minute,
12
00:01:12,557 --> 00:01:14,605
we have some business to attend to.
13
00:01:16,579 --> 00:01:18,331
Where did you find this?
14
00:01:21,244 --> 00:01:22,016
Damn.
15
00:01:22,784 --> 00:01:24,756
She smells fuckin' sweet.
16
00:01:25,627 --> 00:01:27,480
And to think just five minutes ago
17
00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:30,912
you were telling us how you were
living mainly on synthetic blood.
18
00:01:31,779 --> 00:01:32,984
You big poseur.
19
00:01:33,276 --> 00:01:34,759
I don't know, Malcolm.
20
00:01:35,364 --> 00:01:37,098
She looks like a virgin to me.
21
00:01:37,260 --> 00:01:39,726
That's none of your damn business,
you nosy bitch.
22
00:01:39,887 --> 00:01:41,858
It is my business, cupcake.
23
00:01:42,548 --> 00:01:44,010
You wanna know why?
24
00:01:44,130 --> 00:01:48,574
Because virgin blood
is the best-tasting blood there is.
25
00:01:50,565 --> 00:01:51,879
Well, second best.
26
00:01:52,426 --> 00:01:54,743
- The best would be...
- Baby's blood.
27
00:01:56,707 --> 00:01:59,299
I get hard just thinking about it.
28
00:02:02,427 --> 00:02:03,376
Ladies first.
29
00:02:07,332 --> 00:02:08,182
Stop!
30
00:02:10,078 --> 00:02:11,342
Sookie is mine.
31
00:02:18,078 --> 00:02:22,342
Synchro: SilverArrow et mpm
32
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www.sub-way.fr / www.seriessub.com
33
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Corrections were made by Isocrate[SubScene]
<-Credit goes to the original subber->
34
00:03:46,127 --> 00:03:48,346
True Blood, Season 1, Episode 3
35
00:03:49,374 --> 00:03:50,631
Well, if you're Bill's,
36
00:03:51,484 --> 00:03:53,201
I certainly don't wanna do anything
37
00:03:53,321 --> 00:03:55,403
to disturb your little arrangement.
38
00:03:57,605 --> 00:04:00,154
That's why I always bring
Jerry with me.
39
00:04:00,571 --> 00:04:01,609
Wherever I go.
40
00:04:03,006 --> 00:04:04,638
He's like mad money.
41
00:04:06,181 --> 00:04:08,334
Somebody needs
to get down on my johnson.
42
00:04:14,884 --> 00:04:15,993
She's innocent.
43
00:04:17,212 --> 00:04:18,385
She's mine.
44
00:04:18,716 --> 00:04:19,929
Yeah, yeah, we got it.
45
00:04:22,131 --> 00:04:26,057
So, why aren't you over there
taking care of your master, human?
46
00:04:26,935 --> 00:04:28,791
Can't you see
how hungry he is?
47
00:04:30,892 --> 00:04:34,569
Bill, if you're hungry you're
more than welcome to have some of Jerry.
48
00:04:50,659 --> 00:04:52,280
Come on, suck it.
49
00:04:58,033 --> 00:05:01,450
Stick them in already. Get infected,
you fucking vampire asshole.
50
00:05:01,673 --> 00:05:03,954
Come on, do it.
Let's see how you like hep D.
51
00:05:04,074 --> 00:05:06,099
You fuckers ain't be able
to move for like a year.
52
00:05:06,261 --> 00:05:07,642
Stop, he has hep D!
53
00:05:09,211 --> 00:05:10,229
What is hep D?
54
00:05:10,551 --> 00:05:11,853
Fuckin' bitch!
55
00:05:13,602 --> 00:05:15,776
How does she know?
{\There's no way.}I didn't tell a soul.
56
00:05:15,936 --> 00:05:17,619
These fuckers killed Marcus!
57
00:05:17,739 --> 00:05:19,279
If he hadn't gotten hooked on V,
58
00:05:19,441 --> 00:05:21,823
he never would have left me.
We would've been...
59
00:05:32,328 --> 00:05:35,713
This has all been very illuminating.
60
00:05:36,609 --> 00:05:39,622
But we've got a long ride
back to Monroe,
61
00:05:39,742 --> 00:05:43,058
and I'm sure we'll all wanna
have a little talk with Jerry
62
00:05:44,298 --> 00:05:45,407
when he wakes up.
63
00:05:45,841 --> 00:05:48,226
Out, Janella.
We're being evicted.
64
00:05:52,579 --> 00:05:54,837
Isn't anyone even
the slightest bit interested
65
00:05:54,957 --> 00:05:57,693
in how this little bitch
knew about Jerry?
66
00:06:00,071 --> 00:06:02,448
You can't speak yet,
can you, sweetheart?
67
00:06:05,816 --> 00:06:07,341
I could make her talk.
68
00:06:08,816 --> 00:06:09,341
Diane.
69
00:06:10,157 --> 00:06:11,165
You forget.
70
00:06:13,415 --> 00:06:14,450
Yeah, yeah.
She's yours.
71
00:06:16,285 --> 00:06:17,298
Whatever.
72
00:06:20,341 --> 00:06:22,164
Jerry, you stupid bitch.
73
00:06:22,543 --> 00:06:24,819
Nobody fucks with me
and gets away with it.
74
00:06:50,813 --> 00:06:52,424
I'm sorry you had to witness that.
75
00:06:58,253 --> 00:06:59,960
Their visit was unexpected.
76
00:07:05,479 --> 00:07:06,801
What's hep D?
77
00:07:08,927 --> 00:07:12,851
Hepatitis D is the only blood-borne
pathogen to which we are susceptible.
78
00:07:14,199 --> 00:07:15,756
Malcolm must be furious.
79
00:07:15,876 --> 00:07:16,986
Hepatitis?
80
00:07:17,166 --> 00:07:18,126
A mutation.
81
00:07:18,560 --> 00:07:20,573
Relatively harmless to humans,
oddly enough.
82
00:07:20,693 --> 00:07:22,231
I've never even heard of it.
83
00:07:22,351 --> 00:07:24,446
That's because we've
kept it out of the media.
84
00:07:24,649 --> 00:07:26,281
And it makes you sick for a year?
85
00:07:27,250 --> 00:07:30,369
No, just makes us weak
for about a month or so.
86
00:07:30,798 --> 00:07:32,455
The biggest danger to us from hep D
87
00:07:32,657 --> 00:07:35,437
is being captured and staked
during that time.
88
00:07:35,661 --> 00:07:39,128
Yeah. you don't want your weaknesses
to be public knowledge.
89
00:07:39,399 --> 00:07:40,445
Precisely.
90
00:07:40,565 --> 00:07:43,309
And what the hell did you mean,
"Sookie is mine"?
91
00:07:43,429 --> 00:07:46,348
I was communicating to the others
that you were my human,
92
00:07:46,468 --> 00:07:48,678
and therefore I was the only one
who could feed on you.
93
00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:51,439
You must certainly
cannot feed on me.
94
00:07:51,559 --> 00:07:55,119
Of course I can't Sookie. But had they known that,
they would have considered you fair game.
95
00:07:55,239 --> 00:07:57,520
I wouldn't have been able
to stop them from attacking you.
96
00:07:57,681 --> 00:08:01,150
It'd be three against one, and Malcolm
is much older than I am and quite strong.
97
00:08:02,297 --> 00:08:03,865
And you and Diane dated?
98
00:08:05,272 --> 00:08:06,104
We...
99
00:08:07,246 --> 00:08:08,376
had sex once.
100
00:08:10,552 --> 00:08:13,644
Just after she was made a vampire,
back in the late 1930s.
101
00:08:14,199 --> 00:08:15,021
What?
102
00:08:15,511 --> 00:08:16,333
Gross.
103
00:08:18,177 --> 00:08:20,336
Bill, she's so...
They're all so mean, so...
104
00:08:20,538 --> 00:08:21,303
Evil.
105
00:08:22,202 --> 00:08:23,268
Yes, they are.
106
00:08:24,394 --> 00:08:25,695
They share a nest.
107
00:08:26,494 --> 00:08:30,046
And when vampires live
in nests they become cruel, more
108
00:08:30,825 --> 00:08:31,838
vicious.
109
00:08:33,538 --> 00:08:35,405
They become laws
unto themselves.
110
00:08:38,210 --> 00:08:39,981
Whereas vampires such as I,
111
00:08:41,086 --> 00:08:42,164
who live alone,
112
00:08:44,282 --> 00:08:48,406
much more likely to hang onto
some semblance of our former humanity.
113
00:08:52,701 --> 00:08:53,578
Here.
114
00:08:55,874 --> 00:08:58,791
Contact info for two
electrical contractors.
115
00:08:59,190 --> 00:09:01,809
They're willing to come out at night
and give you clothes.
116
00:09:02,127 --> 00:09:03,129
Thank you.
117
00:09:03,331 --> 00:09:05,213
- I have to go.
- May I kiss you goodnight?
118
00:09:05,331 --> 00:09:06,213
No!
119
00:09:08,372 --> 00:09:10,252
I couldn't stand it after them.
120
00:09:20,462 --> 00:09:22,812
- Why you still here?
- I don't wanna go home.
121
00:09:24,666 --> 00:09:25,608
Night, y'all.
122
00:09:26,265 --> 00:09:27,969
- Night, Dawn.
- Night.
123
00:09:31,166 --> 00:09:32,617
Can I have one of those?
124
00:09:36,812 --> 00:09:37,819
I guess.
125
00:09:38,447 --> 00:09:39,956
As long as you're not on clock.
126
00:09:46,492 --> 00:09:50,137
Sam, you think Sookie's getting
serious about that vampire?
127
00:09:53,762 --> 00:09:55,571
I think she's getting to know him.
128
00:09:56,485 --> 00:09:59,161
And once she does, I don't think
she'll be getting too serious about him.
129
00:09:59,281 --> 00:10:01,646
I think he's getting
pretty damn serious about her.
130
00:10:03,936 --> 00:10:04,853
How so?
131
00:10:04,973 --> 00:10:07,158
I was over at
the Stackhouses' last night.
132
00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:09,362
He came over to call on Sookie.
133
00:10:09,926 --> 00:10:12,305
All cleaned up
and smellin' nice.
134
00:10:12,775 --> 00:10:15,068
Lookin' like he just stepped out
of some piece of shit movie
135
00:10:15,188 --> 00:10:16,885
about plantations and shit.
136
00:10:17,519 --> 00:10:19,789
Do you know he actually
owned slaves?
137
00:10:20,331 --> 00:10:22,517
Least he could've done
was apologize to me.
138
00:10:23,976 --> 00:10:26,590
How did Miss Stackhouse seem to feel
about a vampire being in her house,
139
00:10:26,710 --> 00:10:28,265
interested in her granddaughter?
140
00:10:29,167 --> 00:10:31,300
Sam,
she seemed like she was in seventh heaven.
141
00:10:31,502 --> 00:10:33,067
It was fuckin' weird.
142
00:10:37,425 --> 00:10:39,734
You know you don't have
anybody to blame but yourself.
143
00:10:41,930 --> 00:10:44,093
It's obvious you're carrying
a big one for Sookie.
144
00:10:44,307 --> 00:10:45,832
I've known it ever since I met you.
145
00:10:45,952 --> 00:10:48,764
That's really not any
of your business, now, is it?
146
00:10:48,884 --> 00:10:50,319
She's always been,
147
00:10:50,804 --> 00:10:51,657
Well,
148
00:10:51,804 --> 00:10:54,657
Peculiar around men. I mean,
she's not gonna make the first move.
149
00:10:55,263 --> 00:10:57,168
Do I have to remind you
that I'm your boss?
150
00:10:57,288 --> 00:10:58,327
Oh, come on, Sam.
151
00:10:58,529 --> 00:11:01,108
Don't even try to pull any of
that "working for the man" shit with me.
152
00:11:01,228 --> 00:11:03,173
You should've said something,
and you know it.
153
00:11:03,293 --> 00:11:04,580
How come you never have?
154
00:11:04,700 --> 00:11:07,350
How come you never
said anything to Jason?
155
00:11:07,670 --> 00:11:10,547
Because I'm comfortable with him
being right where he is,
156
00:11:10,805 --> 00:11:12,266
which is unattainable.
157
00:11:13,586 --> 00:11:15,791
Which is part of my whole
fucked-up thing.
158
00:11:15,911 --> 00:11:19,424
Low self-esteem, childhood trauma,
blah-blah, snore.
159
00:11:19,914 --> 00:11:21,333
What's your excuse?
160
00:11:21,678 --> 00:11:22,586
You know,
161
00:11:22,927 --> 00:11:25,968
not everybody likes to lay
their guts out on the table like that, Tara.
162
00:11:26,088 --> 00:11:27,694
Yeah, they might not like it,
163
00:11:28,090 --> 00:11:31,192
but they all dream about finding
somebody they can do it with.
164
00:11:39,802 --> 00:11:41,286
You know, the funny thing is?
165
00:11:43,205 --> 00:11:46,667
I kind of did let Sookie know
for the first time night before last.
166
00:11:48,510 --> 00:11:51,621
Not even a minute before that vampire
walked through my front door.
167
00:11:52,114 --> 00:11:53,362
Well, if I were you,
168
00:11:53,482 --> 00:11:55,683
I would get in there right now
while you still got a shot.
169
00:11:55,803 --> 00:11:58,119
No, you wouldn't.
You just said so yourself.
170
00:11:58,803 --> 00:11:59,119
Well...
171
00:12:07,463 --> 00:12:09,033
She can't hear his thoughts.
172
00:12:09,599 --> 00:12:10,507
For real?
173
00:12:12,968 --> 00:12:15,050
Well, that explains everything.
174
00:12:18,071 --> 00:12:21,190
I told her she can listen to my thoughts
whenever she wanted to.
175
00:12:21,310 --> 00:12:23,661
No, see, she doesn't wanna
listen to anybody's thoughts.
176
00:12:23,823 --> 00:12:25,180
She wants to not hear 'em.
177
00:12:25,648 --> 00:12:27,870
But that requires
constant work on her part.
178
00:12:28,890 --> 00:12:30,885
And now she's met somebody
and she can
179
00:12:31,720 --> 00:12:34,537
drop all that effort
and just relax...
180
00:12:34,657 --> 00:12:36,758
Oh, man, you don't
stand a chance.
181
00:12:36,961 --> 00:12:38,960
I'm really sorry, but you don't.
182
00:12:39,080 --> 00:12:40,920
You know, you can go home
anytime you want.
183
00:12:41,040 --> 00:12:42,040
No, I can't.
184
00:12:42,927 --> 00:12:43,887
Really.
185
00:13:05,656 --> 00:13:07,255
- You kept me waiting.
- Oh, God.
186
00:13:07,375 --> 00:13:09,038
I don't like to wait.
187
00:13:09,729 --> 00:13:11,585
I need to taste you again.
188
00:13:11,829 --> 00:13:13,170
Come on, Jason.
189
00:13:13,414 --> 00:13:17,319
I probably should've told you
I've got a highly addictive nature,
190
00:13:17,525 --> 00:13:19,882
I'm gonna get some more
of that sweet stuff out of you.
191
00:13:20,422 --> 00:13:22,971
I guess you don't have
too much of a problem with that.
192
00:13:24,382 --> 00:13:27,184
Don't fight me.
Because I will hurt you.
193
00:13:27,975 --> 00:13:29,252
What are you to me?
194
00:13:29,372 --> 00:13:33,462
Just another idiot slut
who puts out for vampires.
195
00:13:38,052 --> 00:13:39,196
Here we go.
196
00:13:39,671 --> 00:13:41,323
I know you liked it.
197
00:13:43,027 --> 00:13:45,117
Slow down. I'm in no hurry.
198
00:13:45,661 --> 00:13:49,678
I just drained that poor fuck
you left tied up to the bed.
199
00:13:49,798 --> 00:13:52,448
Very considerate of you,
by the way.
200
00:13:52,568 --> 00:13:54,783
Oh, God!
Where is he? Oh, no!
201
00:13:54,903 --> 00:13:56,298
Which part of him?
202
00:13:57,656 --> 00:13:59,988
- This isn't happening.
- What do you expect me to do?
203
00:14:00,108 --> 00:14:02,458
You lay them out like
an all-you-can-eat buffet.
204
00:14:03,312 --> 00:14:06,276
Although he did put up
quite a fight.
205
00:14:17,893 --> 00:14:18,976
You!
- Oh yeah.
206
00:14:19,355 --> 00:14:22,656
That is not funny.
That is not funny!
207
00:14:23,945 --> 00:14:24,814
You...
208
00:14:26,335 --> 00:14:28,585
Just think of it as foreplay, baby.
209
00:14:29,572 --> 00:14:31,300
Do it again. Do it again.
210
00:14:35,244 --> 00:14:37,038
Give me some of that sweet stuff.
211
00:15:16,912 --> 00:15:18,013
Goddamn it, Bill.
212
00:15:18,258 --> 00:15:21,173
How many times do I have to tell you,
do not do that?
213
00:15:22,083 --> 00:15:24,831
I'm sorry. It wasn't intentional.
I just got here.
214
00:15:27,047 --> 00:15:29,020
I wanted to make sure
that you were safe.
215
00:15:36,772 --> 00:15:38,549
Why can't I hear your thoughts?
216
00:15:39,241 --> 00:15:40,992
Do you even have any thoughts?
217
00:15:44,075 --> 00:15:45,680
Oh, I have thoughts.
218
00:15:46,951 --> 00:15:48,815
Many lifetimes of thoughts.
219
00:15:48,935 --> 00:15:50,364
So why can't I hear them?
220
00:15:52,892 --> 00:15:53,980
I don't know.
221
00:15:55,224 --> 00:15:57,207
Perhaps it's 'cause
I don't have brain waves.
222
00:15:57,616 --> 00:15:58,512
Why not?
223
00:15:59,293 --> 00:16:00,402
Because I'm dead.
224
00:16:00,938 --> 00:16:03,957
No, you're not.
You're standing here, talking to me.
225
00:16:04,544 --> 00:16:05,888
I have no heartbeat.
226
00:16:06,587 --> 00:16:08,337
I have no need to breathe.
227
00:16:09,603 --> 00:16:11,939
There are no electrical impulses
in my body.
228
00:16:12,601 --> 00:16:15,033
What animates you
no longer animates me.
229
00:16:15,666 --> 00:16:17,266
What does animate you, then?
230
00:16:18,366 --> 00:16:19,144
Blood?
231
00:16:20,317 --> 00:16:23,058
How do you digest it
if nothing works?
232
00:16:24,271 --> 00:16:26,099
- Magic.
- Oh, come on, Bill.
233
00:16:26,219 --> 00:16:28,370
I may look naive,
but I'm not.
234
00:16:28,490 --> 00:16:30,336
And you need to remember that.
235
00:16:30,861 --> 00:16:33,093
You think that it's not magic
that keeps you alive?
236
00:16:35,189 --> 00:16:38,274
Just 'cause you understand
the mechanics of how something works
237
00:16:38,552 --> 00:16:40,717
doesn't make it
any less of a miracle.
238
00:16:41,756 --> 00:16:43,943
Which is just another word
for magic.
239
00:16:46,609 --> 00:16:48,795
We're all kept alive by magic, Sookie.
240
00:16:50,547 --> 00:16:53,269
My magic's just a little
different from yours, that's all.
241
00:16:57,242 --> 00:16:59,439
I think we need
to stop seeing each other.
242
00:17:00,182 --> 00:17:01,034
Why?
243
00:17:01,663 --> 00:17:03,172
Because you don't breathe.
244
00:17:03,292 --> 00:17:05,472
You don't have any
electrical whatever-it-is.
245
00:17:05,592 --> 00:17:08,101
Your friends like nothing more
than rip my throat out.
246
00:17:08,221 --> 00:17:10,029
And because vampires
killed that preacher
247
00:17:10,149 --> 00:17:12,743
from the Fellowship of the Sun church
and his wife and baby.
248
00:17:13,882 --> 00:17:16,687
You look me in the eye
and tell me they didn't do it.
249
00:17:17,560 --> 00:17:21,050
Humans have killed millions
upon millions in senseless wars.
250
00:17:22,289 --> 00:17:24,175
I do not hold you
responsible for that.
251
00:17:24,295 --> 00:17:26,554
Night before last,
I had to bury my bloody clothes
252
00:17:26,674 --> 00:17:29,714
because I didn't want my grandmother
to find out I was almost killed.
253
00:17:29,834 --> 00:17:31,934
And tonight,
I was almost killed again.
254
00:17:32,169 --> 00:17:34,270
Why on earth
would I continue seeing you?
255
00:17:40,764 --> 00:17:43,840
Because you will never find
the human man you can be yourself with.
256
00:17:48,764 --> 00:17:49,440
Sookie.
257
00:17:49,614 --> 00:17:50,948
Do not touch me.
258
00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:56,234
Just go, please.
259
00:18:11,232 --> 00:18:12,894
Thanks.
260
00:18:14,518 --> 00:18:15,328
So...
261
00:18:16,799 --> 00:18:18,669
Can I ask you a personal question?
262
00:18:19,678 --> 00:18:20,605
Sure.
263
00:18:22,638 --> 00:18:24,446
Why is it
you don't wanna go home?
264
00:18:25,182 --> 00:18:26,408
This right here.
265
00:18:30,312 --> 00:18:31,617
My mama's a drunk.
266
00:18:32,759 --> 00:18:35,297
Not just a slurs-her-words drunk,
267
00:18:35,623 --> 00:18:37,810
a waking-up-in-her-own-vomit
kind of drunk.
268
00:18:39,998 --> 00:18:41,050
I'm sorry.
269
00:18:41,240 --> 00:18:43,584
I just can't be around her
when she's gone like that.
270
00:18:43,985 --> 00:18:44,596
Yeah.
271
00:18:44,985 --> 00:18:46,596
I know she may end up dying,
272
00:18:47,638 --> 00:18:50,123
lighting herself on fire
with a lit cigarette,
273
00:18:51,326 --> 00:18:52,948
but I can't. I won't.
274
00:18:54,932 --> 00:18:57,673
So, see, not only
is the whole situation horrible,
275
00:18:58,184 --> 00:19:00,542
my guilt about it
just makes it that much worse.
276
00:19:02,730 --> 00:19:06,263
- Why don't you get your own place?
- Why don't you give me a raise?
277
00:19:10,274 --> 00:19:11,746
Had she ever tried AA?
278
00:19:12,397 --> 00:19:13,903
She doesn't need AA, Sam.
279
00:19:14,171 --> 00:19:15,398
She's got Jesus.
280
00:19:21,587 --> 00:19:22,643
Can I
281
00:19:23,635 --> 00:19:25,107
ask you a personal question?
282
00:19:28,837 --> 00:19:29,786
Hold on.
283
00:19:31,674 --> 00:19:32,702
All right.
284
00:19:35,231 --> 00:19:36,394
Are you lonely?
285
00:19:40,291 --> 00:19:41,646
Yes.
286
00:19:43,291 --> 00:19:44,646
I am. I am very...
287
00:19:45,222 --> 00:19:46,160
very lonely.
288
00:19:47,835 --> 00:19:49,573
How come you don't have
a girlfriend?
289
00:19:50,225 --> 00:19:52,441
Plenty of women in this town
will go for you.
290
00:19:52,688 --> 00:19:54,569
- I don't know if that's true.
- You're hot,
291
00:19:54,763 --> 00:19:57,410
you have a job,
you're not a serial killer.
292
00:19:58,072 --> 00:19:59,907
Who could resist that?
- Well.
293
00:20:00,675 --> 00:20:03,830
- Why don't you have a boyfriend?
- We're not talking about me right now.
294
00:20:07,409 --> 00:20:08,619
Yeah, well...
295
00:20:10,155 --> 00:20:11,879
I have a hard time
296
00:20:12,707 --> 00:20:14,148
opening up, that's all.
297
00:20:14,424 --> 00:20:15,576
Oh, please.
298
00:20:15,950 --> 00:20:18,242
What have you got to hide
that's so fucking bad
299
00:20:18,672 --> 00:20:20,450
- in this fucking town?
- No, Tara.
300
00:20:20,882 --> 00:20:23,599
I said I have a hard time opening up,
and I mean it. I'm not gonna do it.
301
00:20:23,760 --> 00:20:25,178
Don't you ever get horny?
302
00:20:26,428 --> 00:20:27,467
Sure.
303
00:20:29,217 --> 00:20:31,191
How long has it been
since you got sex?
304
00:20:36,597 --> 00:20:37,634
A few months.
305
00:20:37,754 --> 00:20:39,324
- That sucks.
- How about you?
306
00:20:39,568 --> 00:20:42,304
- Eight months, three weeks.
- That sucks.
307
00:20:43,019 --> 00:20:44,331
You don't know.
308
00:20:44,915 --> 00:20:45,939
Ah, well.
309
00:20:46,771 --> 00:20:48,077
Well, I guess you do.
310
00:20:52,667 --> 00:20:54,875
- You want another one?
- Are you kidding?
311
00:20:55,280 --> 00:20:57,479
I'm an adult child of an alcoholic.
312
00:20:57,895 --> 00:20:59,998
- I'll need at least three more.
- All right.
313
00:21:01,612 --> 00:21:03,190
I'll be right back.
Alright.
314
00:21:20,734 --> 00:21:22,659
So maybe you and I
should sleep together.
315
00:21:24,972 --> 00:21:27,436
- Yeah, right.
- No, I mean, we're grownups.
316
00:21:28,575 --> 00:21:29,628
No strings.
317
00:21:30,196 --> 00:21:32,452
- Friends with benefits.
- You're my employee.
318
00:21:33,645 --> 00:21:35,359
Sam, aren't you sick of not getting laid?
319
00:21:35,479 --> 00:21:36,738
I know I am.
320
00:21:37,269 --> 00:21:39,445
- Yeah, but that doesn't mean...
- You have condoms?
321
00:21:40,981 --> 00:21:42,496
Tara, that's a terrible idea.
322
00:21:43,217 --> 00:21:44,186
All right.
323
00:21:44,518 --> 00:21:45,521
Whatever.
324
00:21:46,018 --> 00:21:48,162
I mean, I am not
looking for a boyfriend.
325
00:21:49,090 --> 00:21:51,279
Especially one who could fire me.
326
00:21:51,460 --> 00:21:53,709
This would strictly
be a one-time deal.
327
00:21:53,829 --> 00:21:56,190
We never even have
to mention it again.
328
00:21:57,829 --> 00:21:58,190
No.
329
00:21:59,515 --> 00:22:00,624
Suit yourself.
330
00:22:14,241 --> 00:22:15,689
You really think you'd be able to forget about it
331
00:22:15,809 --> 00:22:18,086
and not let it affect
our working relationship?
332
00:22:18,500 --> 00:22:21,567
I've had to do much harder things
than that in my life, believe me.
333
00:22:23,695 --> 00:22:25,943
Because if it got weird,
I'd probably have to let you go.
334
00:22:26,063 --> 00:22:29,175
Big deal. Didn't even wanna
hire me in the first place.
335
00:22:35,063 --> 00:22:36,175
Okay.
336
00:22:37,063 --> 00:22:38,175
Yeah?
337
00:22:41,016 --> 00:22:41,923
Great.
338
00:22:50,569 --> 00:22:52,576
- You feel nice.
- Yeah, I know I do.
339
00:23:18,234 --> 00:23:19,192
What's wrong?
340
00:23:21,036 --> 00:23:22,770
Jason, baby.
341
00:23:24,540 --> 00:23:25,609
What is it?
342
00:23:29,612 --> 00:23:31,955
I hate that you've been
with vampires.
343
00:23:32,240 --> 00:23:34,193
And how exactly is that
any of your business?
344
00:23:34,313 --> 00:23:36,293
They're fucked up.
They're freaks.
345
00:23:36,611 --> 00:23:37,933
They're fucking dead.
346
00:23:38,287 --> 00:23:41,505
What's wrong with you, letting something
nasty like that even touch you?
347
00:23:41,625 --> 00:23:43,904
That was the best sex
I ever had in my life.
348
00:23:44,024 --> 00:23:45,425
And who are you to judge?
349
00:23:45,587 --> 00:23:48,196
You fuck anything with a space
between its legs.
350
00:23:48,316 --> 00:23:50,212
You told me I was the best sex
you ever had.
351
00:23:50,332 --> 00:23:52,934
And then you stopped calling.
And coming to Merlotte's.
352
00:23:53,363 --> 00:23:55,432
And then I met that vampire.
353
00:23:56,573 --> 00:23:57,725
Which vampire?
354
00:23:58,342 --> 00:24:00,650
Bald-headed, tattoos,
crazy?
355
00:24:03,802 --> 00:24:04,594
No.
356
00:24:04,802 --> 00:24:06,594
Actually,
he had a lot of hair.
357
00:24:08,902 --> 00:24:11,862
I met him in Shreveport
at the vampire bar.
358
00:24:12,154 --> 00:24:13,711
And you just let him
bite you?
359
00:24:14,749 --> 00:24:16,007
Yeah, and I'm not...
360
00:24:16,274 --> 00:24:18,287
- I'm not ashamed of that.
- You ought to be.
361
00:24:18,407 --> 00:24:20,319
You ought to get off
your high horse.
362
00:24:21,735 --> 00:24:23,439
Is that who you thought
I was tonight?
363
00:24:23,559 --> 00:24:26,200
When you started rubbing up against me
like a cat in heat?
364
00:24:26,432 --> 00:24:28,751
No, baby. I knew all along
it was you.
365
00:24:28,871 --> 00:24:30,482
You're a lying sack of shit.
366
00:24:30,602 --> 00:24:32,693
You would fuck that vampire
and let him bite you
367
00:24:32,813 --> 00:24:34,666
- if he showed up tonight.
- All right.
368
00:24:34,786 --> 00:24:37,506
Now this is getting boring.
369
00:24:38,881 --> 00:24:41,233
And I think
you should leave.
370
00:24:42,634 --> 00:24:44,633
And you gonna throw me out?
I don't think so.
371
00:24:44,753 --> 00:24:47,114
- This is my house.
- And I ain't going nowhere.
372
00:24:48,015 --> 00:24:49,864
God, just because
you lost your hard-on
373
00:24:50,026 --> 00:24:52,595
doesn't mean you have to have
a fucking meltdown.
374
00:24:52,715 --> 00:24:56,168
Believe it or not Jason, the world does not
revolve around your dick.
375
00:24:56,741 --> 00:24:59,215
- Where are you going?
- To get a cigarette!
376
00:24:59,335 --> 00:25:01,903
It isn't like I don't know
that you're a great fuck.
377
00:25:02,023 --> 00:25:03,972
It happens to every guy
at some point or another.
378
00:25:04,092 --> 00:25:06,504
Would you stop talking about it,
please?
379
00:25:08,147 --> 00:25:09,970
Every guy except for vampires.
380
00:25:14,216 --> 00:25:17,076
- Does it look like I'm laughing?
- Ah, you should be.
381
00:25:17,787 --> 00:25:20,475
You do not own me,
Jason Stackhouse.
382
00:25:21,182 --> 00:25:22,893
And if I want you out of my house,
383
00:25:23,013 --> 00:25:25,256
you better get
your sorry ass out of here.
384
00:25:26,379 --> 00:25:28,491
- I ain't going nowhere.
- Oh, yes, you are.
385
00:25:30,567 --> 00:25:33,785
You are obnoxious
and full of yourself
386
00:25:34,069 --> 00:25:35,577
and dumber than a box of hair.
387
00:25:35,737 --> 00:25:37,815
And now you can't even get it up?
388
00:25:38,506 --> 00:25:40,658
There's no reason
why I should be seeing you anymore.
389
00:25:40,778 --> 00:25:43,210
- You're fucking crazy.
- You bet your sweet ass I am.
390
00:25:43,370 --> 00:25:44,837
Now get the fuck out of my house.
391
00:25:44,997 --> 00:25:47,923
- Let me get my pants on.
- I don't think I feel like waiting.
392
00:25:49,790 --> 00:25:50,926
Get the fuck out!
393
00:25:51,155 --> 00:25:52,830
Goddamn it, woman.
394
00:25:53,585 --> 00:25:55,973
That's right, you get the fuck
out of my house!
395
00:25:56,133 --> 00:25:57,606
Limp dick motherfucker!
396
00:25:57,726 --> 00:26:00,269
Go try your fucking grandmother
with that limp dick!
397
00:26:00,429 --> 00:26:02,066
Bitch! I can get it up!
398
00:26:04,007 --> 00:26:04,818
Bitch!
399
00:26:09,920 --> 00:26:12,683
Yeah, you heard me.
Your neighbor's a crazy bitch!
400
00:26:20,183 --> 00:26:21,709
Damn bloodsuckers.
401
00:26:22,477 --> 00:26:23,426
Fuck!
402
00:26:50,147 --> 00:26:52,347
Sookie, don't ever sneak up
on a vampire.
403
00:26:54,295 --> 00:26:55,598
What are you doing here?
404
00:26:56,065 --> 00:26:59,368
All right, here's the deal.
And this is a little embarrassing.
405
00:27:00,140 --> 00:27:01,904
I've never been with a man
intimately,
406
00:27:02,024 --> 00:27:04,536
for all the reasons
I told you about.
407
00:27:04,656 --> 00:27:07,398
But I feel things when I'm with you
that make me think.
408
00:27:07,518 --> 00:27:10,505
And I know this could be a huge mistake,
one I will regret forever.
409
00:27:10,666 --> 00:27:12,109
But it feels like you're the one
410
00:27:12,229 --> 00:27:14,390
that I'm supposed to,
you know, do it with,
411
00:27:14,510 --> 00:27:17,913
and I'm really nervous about that,
and frankly, I'm scared to death of you.
412
00:27:18,033 --> 00:27:20,051
So can we just
get it out of the way already
413
00:27:20,171 --> 00:27:22,243
so I can relax
and get a good night's sleep?
414
00:27:27,338 --> 00:27:28,750
Just don't bite me, okay?
415
00:28:22,028 --> 00:28:23,203
Stop that.
416
00:29:17,199 --> 00:29:18,425
You gotta be kidding me.
417
00:29:21,421 --> 00:29:23,220
... but the vampires
assassinated my father,
418
00:29:23,381 --> 00:29:25,557
because of his campaign
against the vampire agenda.
419
00:29:25,718 --> 00:29:27,601
Theodore Newlin is a hero.
420
00:29:27,761 --> 00:29:30,103
- First casualty in World War III.
- Amen.
421
00:29:30,263 --> 00:29:31,454
It's Armageddon.
422
00:29:31,640 --> 00:29:33,122
- Amen.
- Amen.
423
00:29:33,242 --> 00:29:35,025
... I intend to continue my father's work...
424
00:29:35,244 --> 00:29:38,487
Vampire bats
are bats that feed on blood,
425
00:29:38,647 --> 00:29:41,448
feeding on the blood of animals
like pigs and horses.
426
00:29:41,987 --> 00:29:44,159
The vampire bat requires
about two tablespoon...
427
00:29:45,500 --> 00:29:46,513
Damn it.
428
00:29:48,727 --> 00:29:50,984
Oh, Malcolm. Come on, baby.
429
00:29:54,229 --> 00:29:55,218
Damn.
430
00:29:55,815 --> 00:29:58,087
I really liked Jerry.
431
00:29:59,670 --> 00:30:00,971
Don't worry.
432
00:30:01,526 --> 00:30:04,246
We'll find you another
hot little blood bank.
433
00:30:05,207 --> 00:30:07,681
Let's go down to LSU tomorrow night
and raid us a frat house.
434
00:30:08,207 --> 00:30:10,681
Oh, yes.
435
00:30:10,846 --> 00:30:14,029
I'm in the mood for something
dumb, thick and juicy.
436
00:30:28,054 --> 00:30:29,067
What luck.
437
00:30:29,326 --> 00:30:31,280
Everyone's favorite buzz-kill.
438
00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:33,516
- Hey, baby.
- Yo, Mr. Main Street.
439
00:30:33,742 --> 00:30:34,583
Thirsty?
440
00:30:35,959 --> 00:30:36,687
No.
441
00:30:36,959 --> 00:30:38,687
Hungry for something else?
442
00:30:40,975 --> 00:30:43,645
I remember you
having a very sizeable...
443
00:30:45,477 --> 00:30:46,388
appetite.
444
00:30:53,346 --> 00:30:56,639
The three of you will stay away
from me and Sookie from now on.
445
00:30:57,311 --> 00:30:58,675
I'm your elder.
446
00:30:59,302 --> 00:31:00,987
You have no authority here.
447
00:31:01,530 --> 00:31:02,978
There are higher authorities.
448
00:31:03,897 --> 00:31:05,881
I'm not afraid of Eric.
449
00:31:06,244 --> 00:31:07,349
Higher than him.
450
00:31:07,961 --> 00:31:10,159
Well, then, she can speak to me.
451
00:31:10,841 --> 00:31:13,622
She can suck on sunlight
for all I care.
452
00:31:14,055 --> 00:31:16,058
You know, you were doing nothing
to help out Carla.
453
00:31:16,178 --> 00:31:19,879
Not everyone wants to dress up
and play Human, Bill.
454
00:31:20,957 --> 00:31:23,132
Yeah, not everybody wants
to live off that Japanese shit
455
00:31:23,252 --> 00:31:24,740
they call blood, either.
456
00:31:24,860 --> 00:31:25,885
As if we could.
457
00:31:26,045 --> 00:31:28,103
We have to moderate our behavior
458
00:31:28,223 --> 00:31:30,097
now that we are out in the open.
459
00:31:30,515 --> 00:31:33,096
Not everybody thinks
it was such a great idea.
460
00:31:33,686 --> 00:31:36,748
And not everybody intends
to tow the party line.
461
00:31:39,835 --> 00:31:42,799
Honey, if we can't
kill people,
462
00:31:42,919 --> 00:31:45,139
what's the point of being a vampire?
463
00:31:46,950 --> 00:31:48,144
Where's Jerry?
464
00:31:49,912 --> 00:31:52,286
We left him on the side of I-20.
465
00:31:52,685 --> 00:31:54,669
Well, most of him, anyway.
466
00:31:55,284 --> 00:31:57,064
I kept a souvenir or two.
467
00:32:00,456 --> 00:32:03,439
Janella felt so bad
about what Jerry did,
468
00:32:04,107 --> 00:32:06,594
she made the ultimate sacrifice.
469
00:32:18,507 --> 00:32:20,089
You know, you all
make me sick.
470
00:32:20,209 --> 00:32:21,891
You used to be fun.
471
00:32:22,488 --> 00:32:25,280
This all on account
of that little blond breather?
472
00:32:26,840 --> 00:32:29,880
If you insist on flaunting
your ways in front of mortals,
473
00:32:31,520 --> 00:32:33,245
there will be consequences.
474
00:32:37,602 --> 00:32:38,604
Asshole.
475
00:33:21,325 --> 00:33:23,627
Where the hell you been,
you dirty whore?
476
00:33:24,238 --> 00:33:26,922
Out all night doing all kinds
of God-know-what.
477
00:33:27,275 --> 00:33:30,247
You the devil, child.
You ain't no child of mine.
478
00:33:31,580 --> 00:33:34,179
- Oh, Jesus.
- Jesus ain't gonna help you.
479
00:33:34,340 --> 00:33:36,431
That's been clear
for quite some time.
480
00:33:36,637 --> 00:33:38,187
You sass the Lord
481
00:33:38,307 --> 00:33:41,061
and I will kick your skinny ass,
you hear me?
482
00:33:41,222 --> 00:33:42,823
You can't even stand up,
483
00:33:43,394 --> 00:33:45,315
you pathetic, ugly old bitch.
484
00:33:57,286 --> 00:33:58,289
Shit.
485
00:33:59,286 --> 00:34:00,289
Oh, mama.
486
00:34:02,145 --> 00:34:03,521
I ain't ugly.
487
00:34:03,641 --> 00:34:06,086
Mama, why do you wanna
do this to yourself?
488
00:34:06,247 --> 00:34:09,398
If Jesus was here,
he'd take one look at you
489
00:34:09,518 --> 00:34:13,035
and he'd apologize for giving me
such a spiteful child.
490
00:34:13,155 --> 00:34:14,231
You kidding?
491
00:34:14,351 --> 00:34:16,988
Jesus wouldn't even set foot
inside this house,
492
00:34:17,108 --> 00:34:18,599
not with the way you smell.
493
00:34:19,595 --> 00:34:20,907
Now, let's just go
494
00:34:21,444 --> 00:34:23,761
and take a shower, Okay?
495
00:34:24,553 --> 00:34:25,833
I'm gonna help you up.
496
00:34:28,352 --> 00:34:29,531
Who's ugly now?
497
00:34:33,655 --> 00:34:34,655
All right.
498
00:34:36,281 --> 00:34:37,813
You may have carried me
499
00:34:38,282 --> 00:34:39,421
and nursed me,
500
00:34:40,723 --> 00:34:43,332
but obviously you are now
set on killing me.
501
00:34:43,452 --> 00:34:46,775
And if I'm forced to choose
between you and me,
502
00:34:47,846 --> 00:34:48,880
guess what?
503
00:34:50,106 --> 00:34:51,132
You lose.
504
00:34:52,454 --> 00:34:54,677
You get back here.
You help me up.
505
00:34:55,614 --> 00:34:57,430
You on your own, old woman.
506
00:35:09,300 --> 00:35:11,326
Sookie.
507
00:35:13,300 --> 00:35:16,326
You're gonna faint
out here in this heat, honey.
508
00:35:17,928 --> 00:35:19,737
It's barely 9:00
509
00:35:20,412 --> 00:35:22,491
and already 80 degrees.
510
00:35:22,894 --> 00:35:24,956
Here. I made you some lemonade.
Fresh-squeezed.
511
00:35:25,117 --> 00:35:26,194
Thanks, Gran.
512
00:35:28,833 --> 00:35:30,922
Goodness, what has got into you?
513
00:35:33,102 --> 00:35:35,603
I just need to stay busy
right now, that's all.
514
00:35:36,377 --> 00:35:39,188
- What? How long have you been...
- I started when the sun came up.
515
00:35:39,308 --> 00:35:42,141
But I was out much earlier than that.
I just stayed inside.
516
00:35:45,454 --> 00:35:47,580
Are you concerned
about the vampire?
517
00:35:48,297 --> 00:35:50,775
Sookie, has he done something untoward?
518
00:35:51,297 --> 00:35:53,600
No, no.
519
00:35:53,727 --> 00:35:54,865
Not at all.
520
00:35:58,629 --> 00:36:00,005
I'm just thinking...
521
00:36:01,964 --> 00:36:04,583
What I'm thinking is...
is stay away.
522
00:36:05,041 --> 00:36:07,295
But what I'm feeling...
What I'm feeling with
523
00:36:07,503 --> 00:36:09,114
my whole body is
524
00:36:10,109 --> 00:36:13,130
something else entirely
and I don't know whether to trust
525
00:36:13,683 --> 00:36:14,905
My head or...
526
00:36:21,135 --> 00:36:22,270
Yes.
527
00:36:18,490 --> 00:36:19,513
Heart.
528
00:36:24,223 --> 00:36:25,925
Well, that is a dilemma.
529
00:36:27,135 --> 00:36:29,270
Why don't you come on inside,
let me make you something to eat.
530
00:36:29,390 --> 00:36:31,273
If you're gonna be out
working like a horse,
531
00:36:31,393 --> 00:36:33,525
you ought to at least to have
something in your stomach.
532
00:36:33,686 --> 00:36:35,069
Oh, no thanks. I'm not hungry.
533
00:36:36,103 --> 00:36:38,322
I didn't ask if you were hungry.
534
00:36:47,442 --> 00:36:48,991
I'm coming! Hell.
535
00:36:49,111 --> 00:36:50,904
Beating on my fucking door.
536
00:36:51,599 --> 00:36:52,599
Damn.
537
00:36:56,719 --> 00:36:58,980
She hit me
with a fucking liquor bottle.
538
00:36:59,100 --> 00:37:01,783
- My head is bleeding.
- Will you stop yelling, I got a guest.
539
00:37:01,903 --> 00:37:03,639
- Oh, shit.
- He in the shower.
540
00:37:03,799 --> 00:37:06,475
- Do you think I'll need stitches?
- Let me see.
541
00:37:07,541 --> 00:37:09,604
No, you're gonna put
some peroxide on that...
542
00:37:10,366 --> 00:37:13,627
Then take two Vicodin
with a big glass of red wine.
543
00:37:13,747 --> 00:37:16,526
Then smoke some badass ganja, baby.
544
00:37:16,687 --> 00:37:19,529
By the time you wake up...
All healed.
545
00:37:21,067 --> 00:37:22,005
Here.
546
00:37:23,390 --> 00:37:24,390
One,
547
00:37:25,264 --> 00:37:26,264
two.
548
00:37:26,692 --> 00:37:29,987
- Mind if I stay here for a while?
- Does it matter if I'm around?
549
00:37:30,394 --> 00:37:31,486
Nope.
- Then do you.
550
00:37:33,315 --> 00:37:35,296
Shit, damn.
551
00:37:36,665 --> 00:37:39,438
- After everything I've done for that woman.
- Poor baby.
552
00:37:39,873 --> 00:37:40,873
Here.
553
00:37:41,498 --> 00:37:42,708
Suck on this.
554
00:37:43,163 --> 00:37:45,326
Here to make you feel
a lot better.
555
00:37:50,007 --> 00:37:51,557
Hi.
556
00:37:53,007 --> 00:37:54,557
This is my cousin Tara.
557
00:37:54,945 --> 00:37:57,318
- Tara, this is...
- Duke. Duke Smith.
558
00:37:59,403 --> 00:38:01,571
Boyfriend, you are so not a duke.
559
00:38:03,917 --> 00:38:04,911
I.. I left you a....
560
00:38:05,917 --> 00:38:06,911
Excellent, excellent.
561
00:38:08,712 --> 00:38:09,828
For the road?
562
00:38:10,494 --> 00:38:11,494
All right.
563
00:38:16,032 --> 00:38:17,054
Thank you.
564
00:38:17,773 --> 00:38:20,380
- Call me when the... comes in.
- I will.
565
00:38:21,005 --> 00:38:24,396
Ta-ta. Take care, Duke.
566
00:38:26,067 --> 00:38:28,724
- What the hell was that?
- That was a state senator.
567
00:38:29,019 --> 00:38:30,309
You're a prostitute now?
568
00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:32,265
I'm an entrepreneur.
569
00:38:34,270 --> 00:38:35,147
What?
570
00:38:36,475 --> 00:38:38,943
I'm supposed to be satisfied
being a fucking short-order cook
571
00:38:39,365 --> 00:38:40,948
and working on the road crew?
572
00:38:41,068 --> 00:38:43,696
Which is basically one step
from the chain gang.
573
00:38:43,857 --> 00:38:47,580
But I ain't complaining, baby.
No, I ain't, 'cause he gives me this body.
574
00:38:49,655 --> 00:38:52,270
And this body's gonna be
my fucking ticket out.
575
00:38:52,812 --> 00:38:56,287
It is. How else am I gonna get ahead
in this poor dump town?
576
00:38:58,998 --> 00:39:00,480
Already got a website.
577
00:39:01,756 --> 00:39:04,387
- Shows due.
- What's wrong with us, Lafayette?
578
00:39:04,756 --> 00:39:06,846
You're a state-senator
fucking prostitute
579
00:39:07,006 --> 00:39:10,009
and I'm a bartender in a redneck bar
who fucks her boss
580
00:39:10,829 --> 00:39:12,869
who's in love with her best friend.
581
00:39:13,054 --> 00:39:15,133
Here just take another hit off this.
582
00:39:21,766 --> 00:39:23,823
Wait a minute.
You slept with Sam.
583
00:39:25,313 --> 00:39:26,452
You know what?
584
00:39:27,082 --> 00:39:28,550
He barks in his sleep.
585
00:39:29,573 --> 00:39:33,166
- Damn, white folks just all fucked up.
- Yeah, that's what I said.
586
00:39:38,426 --> 00:39:39,976
What's up, my brother?
587
00:39:43,255 --> 00:39:44,382
Oh, hell.
588
00:39:45,127 --> 00:39:47,116
Starbucks coming to Marthaville.
589
00:39:48,452 --> 00:39:52,092
I wonder if I just break down
and get a goddamn cappuccino machine.
590
00:39:54,769 --> 00:39:55,621
Hey.
591
00:39:56,769 --> 00:39:59,621
Do you know what I really wish
would come to Marthaville?
592
00:40:01,036 --> 00:40:02,056
Buffy.
593
00:40:03,136 --> 00:40:04,205
A Blade.
594
00:40:05,900 --> 00:40:09,728
Or any one of those badass vampire
killers to take care of Mr. Bill Compton.
595
00:40:09,974 --> 00:40:11,325
That's what I wish.
596
00:40:13,370 --> 00:40:15,410
You don't care about
my problems at all, do you?
597
00:40:15,530 --> 00:40:18,334
You just want to play.
One-track mind.
598
00:40:18,795 --> 00:40:20,359
Ready? Ready? Go!
599
00:40:20,914 --> 00:40:21,926
Go get it!
600
00:40:22,046 --> 00:40:24,006
Marthaville's getting a Starbucks.
601
00:40:25,378 --> 00:40:27,301
I cannot for the life of me see
602
00:40:27,421 --> 00:40:31,055
why anybody would spend $3
on a cup of coffee with too much milk.
603
00:40:31,613 --> 00:40:34,266
Arlene told me
that people are less calcium-deficient
604
00:40:34,427 --> 00:40:38,144
than they used to be because of all
the fancy coffee they drink nowadays.
605
00:40:38,635 --> 00:40:41,649
You know, I never thought of that.
But it does make sense.
606
00:40:49,540 --> 00:40:50,636
Hey, Gran.
607
00:40:52,293 --> 00:40:54,712
Do you think I should
continue seeing Bill?
608
00:40:57,293 --> 00:40:58,712
Sookie.
609
00:40:59,838 --> 00:41:01,103
I can't tell you that.
610
00:41:01,223 --> 00:41:03,324
I can tell you that I think he is
611
00:41:04,445 --> 00:41:05,466
a smart,
612
00:41:06,039 --> 00:41:08,716
handsome and very polite young man.
613
00:41:09,176 --> 00:41:12,332
But of course he's gonna show
his best side to me
614
00:41:12,452 --> 00:41:15,142
so that I won't stand in the way
of his courting you.
615
00:41:17,212 --> 00:41:18,411
He scares me.
616
00:41:20,657 --> 00:41:22,078
Well, it is scary
617
00:41:22,943 --> 00:41:26,165
opening your heart up
to somebody.
618
00:41:27,434 --> 00:41:29,212
I think it's a little scarier
619
00:41:29,500 --> 00:41:32,159
the vampire then... the regular guy?
620
00:41:33,916 --> 00:41:35,184
I suppose.
621
00:41:36,652 --> 00:41:39,400
Bill is the first vampire I've ever met
622
00:41:40,047 --> 00:41:41,291
that I know of.
623
00:41:41,871 --> 00:41:44,204
Not scared that he would
ever hurt me.
624
00:41:45,107 --> 00:41:46,244
Scared because
625
00:41:47,078 --> 00:41:48,980
I don't know what he's thinking.
626
00:41:54,374 --> 00:41:55,829
I would imagine
627
00:41:55,949 --> 00:41:58,707
that wouldn't be such
a bad thing for you
628
00:41:59,165 --> 00:42:00,298
with your...
629
00:42:01,789 --> 00:42:02,855
ability.
630
00:42:12,848 --> 00:42:15,993
You know, your grandfather
used to know things.
631
00:42:20,731 --> 00:42:21,835
What things?
632
00:42:22,232 --> 00:42:24,668
If somebody was having money problems,
running around
633
00:42:24,829 --> 00:42:26,581
behind their wife's back. Sick.
634
00:42:26,701 --> 00:42:27,863
That kind of thing.
635
00:42:27,983 --> 00:42:31,132
Personal things they never
would have told anybody about.
636
00:42:31,293 --> 00:42:33,036
See, that's exactly it.
637
00:42:33,156 --> 00:42:34,898
If I don't stop myself from it,
638
00:42:35,018 --> 00:42:37,808
I hear everybody's deepest,
darkest secrets.
639
00:42:38,175 --> 00:42:40,440
I'm sorry. That's just
too much information.
640
00:42:40,711 --> 00:42:44,092
But then Earl's brother,
your Great-Uncle Francis,
641
00:42:44,212 --> 00:42:46,849
came back from Korea
in real bad shape.
642
00:42:46,969 --> 00:42:49,190
All torn up
from the things he'd seen.
643
00:42:50,371 --> 00:42:51,851
Earl knew
644
00:42:52,332 --> 00:42:54,114
he was thinking
about killing himself.
645
00:42:54,318 --> 00:42:56,594
He went over there in the middle
of the night one night.
646
00:42:56,927 --> 00:43:00,304
Francis was just about to kick
the chair out from underneath him.
647
00:43:00,424 --> 00:43:02,934
Already had the noose
around his neck.
648
00:43:04,570 --> 00:43:06,241
But Earl talked him out of it.
649
00:43:09,801 --> 00:43:13,958
I just think there is a purpose
for everything that God creates,
650
00:43:15,551 --> 00:43:17,606
whether it's a unique ability
651
00:43:19,002 --> 00:43:21,769
or a cup of overpriced coffee
with too much milk.
652
00:43:22,788 --> 00:43:23,852
Or a vampire.
653
00:43:26,229 --> 00:43:29,071
God will reveal that purpose
when the time is right.
654
00:43:40,123 --> 00:43:41,123
Wait.
655
00:43:41,925 --> 00:43:45,040
I thought Great-Uncle Francis
did kill himself, with a shotgun.
656
00:43:46,184 --> 00:43:48,775
Oh, yes, he did.
But that was years that...
657
00:43:56,211 --> 00:43:57,702
Hold on, goddamn it.
658
00:43:58,148 --> 00:43:59,148
Shit.
659
00:44:00,382 --> 00:44:01,581
What the damn fuck?
660
00:44:02,946 --> 00:44:04,061
Well, hello...
661
00:44:04,437 --> 00:44:05,393
hotness.
662
00:44:05,718 --> 00:44:07,020
Lafayette, I need your help.
663
00:44:07,632 --> 00:44:10,774
I am so glad you finally
recognized that truth.
664
00:44:12,563 --> 00:44:14,231
You're wearing gold pants.
665
00:44:18,779 --> 00:44:20,129
So, what you need?
666
00:44:26,380 --> 00:44:27,660
Do you have any...
667
00:44:28,846 --> 00:44:29,846
Viagra?
668
00:44:31,012 --> 00:44:32,012
What?
669
00:44:33,247 --> 00:44:35,642
Viagra. Do you have any Viagra?
670
00:44:38,012 --> 00:44:39,012
No.
671
00:44:40,171 --> 00:44:42,498
Seriously?
I thought you had everything.
672
00:44:42,997 --> 00:44:46,615
Jason,
Puppy dog, Viagra is legal.
673
00:44:47,003 --> 00:44:48,704
You can buy it in the drugstore.
674
00:44:48,824 --> 00:44:51,200
Yeah, I know, but I need it now.
675
00:44:53,229 --> 00:44:54,818
Don't you have anything that would...
676
00:44:54,978 --> 00:44:57,449
Give you wood so hard
a saw couldn't cut through it?
677
00:44:58,429 --> 00:44:59,979
Yeah, that sounds good.
678
00:45:00,472 --> 00:45:01,450
I think.
679
00:45:02,472 --> 00:45:03,450
Yea.
680
00:45:04,362 --> 00:45:05,362
I do.
681
00:45:05,865 --> 00:45:08,080
- But it's very expensive.
- How much?
682
00:45:08,241 --> 00:45:09,875
Six hundred a quarter of an ounce.
683
00:45:10,035 --> 00:45:11,664
Get the fuck out of here.
684
00:45:12,228 --> 00:45:14,517
What in the hell's worth
that kind of money?
685
00:45:30,440 --> 00:45:32,040
When'd you start dealing V?
686
00:45:32,280 --> 00:45:34,734
When I realized
there was a market for it.
687
00:45:35,990 --> 00:45:38,266
Now, I don't want this
getting out, motherfucker.
688
00:45:38,386 --> 00:45:39,917
Do you understand me?
689
00:45:39,386 --> 00:45:40,917
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
690
00:45:41,582 --> 00:45:44,553
The vamps don't take kindly
to the juice dispenser.
691
00:45:45,053 --> 00:45:46,355
Where'd you get it?
692
00:45:46,571 --> 00:45:49,221
Let's just say I have
an arrangement with a certain
693
00:45:49,341 --> 00:45:51,394
life-challenged individual
694
00:45:51,962 --> 00:45:54,933
who appreciate
my multi-faceted talents.
695
00:45:56,075 --> 00:45:57,108
Goddamn.
696
00:45:58,050 --> 00:46:00,758
Is there anybody who isn't
fucking vampires these days?
697
00:46:01,275 --> 00:46:02,871
Tell me something, lover.
698
00:46:03,388 --> 00:46:06,316
Do you wanna get it up and keep it up
and have the best sex you have
699
00:46:06,436 --> 00:46:09,064
ever had for both you and your lady friend?
- Yes, yes, yes.
700
00:46:10,321 --> 00:46:13,186
Take one, maybe two drops of this. No more.
- Okay.
701
00:46:14,468 --> 00:46:18,179
Any more and things might get a little
intense, I don't mean in a good way.
702
00:46:26,903 --> 00:46:28,629
Thanks, man.
Appreciate it.
703
00:46:31,113 --> 00:46:32,992
Ain't nothin' free in my world.
704
00:46:35,947 --> 00:46:38,074
Can I pay you later?
I need to run to the bank.
705
00:46:38,194 --> 00:46:40,154
Motherfucker, who you think I am?
706
00:46:41,393 --> 00:46:43,301
I don't run a layaway program.
707
00:46:44,213 --> 00:46:48,149
- I ain't interested in instituting one.
- Come on, Lafayette.
708
00:46:49,135 --> 00:46:51,393
Isn't there some way you can let
me pay you this afternoon?
709
00:46:54,642 --> 00:46:57,147
Goddamn in, I hate video cameras.
710
00:46:57,308 --> 00:46:59,974
You know how much you could make
if you had your own website?
711
00:47:00,397 --> 00:47:01,994
Queens all over this world
would pay
712
00:47:02,114 --> 00:47:04,321
good money
just to watch you jack off.
713
00:47:04,609 --> 00:47:06,533
You said all I had to do was dance.
714
00:47:07,609 --> 00:47:08,533
Okay.
715
00:47:11,769 --> 00:47:12,814
Dance.
716
00:47:17,504 --> 00:47:19,142
Is anybody gonna see this who knows me?
717
00:47:19,262 --> 00:47:22,047
Probably. There's a lot
of pervs in this town.
718
00:47:22,208 --> 00:47:24,294
No way. That's not cool, man.
719
00:47:25,756 --> 00:47:26,756
Look,
720
00:47:27,860 --> 00:47:29,305
do you want the V or not?
721
00:47:32,795 --> 00:47:34,352
Give me the fucking mask.
722
00:47:35,542 --> 00:47:36,787
That's my Jason.
723
00:47:41,587 --> 00:47:43,054
What the fuck?
724
00:47:53,291 --> 00:47:55,252
I like what you're working with.
725
00:48:02,430 --> 00:48:03,663
Shake that ass.
726
00:48:05,798 --> 00:48:08,428
Lover, you gonna make me
clutch my pearls.
727
00:49:33,219 --> 00:49:34,461
Hello.
728
00:49:35,219 --> 00:49:38,461
- Hey Sookie, it's Sam. Could you do me a favor?
- Sure, maybe.
729
00:49:38,581 --> 00:49:40,629
I'm set to open for lunch
in about 20 minutes,
730
00:49:40,749 --> 00:49:42,563
And Dawn still hasn't shown up
for her shift.
731
00:49:42,768 --> 00:49:45,167
Oh, Sam, I really need my day off.
732
00:49:45,351 --> 00:49:48,527
I'm not asking you to come in. I need
you to run by Dawn's and wake her up.
733
00:49:48,876 --> 00:49:50,508
She probably just overslept.
734
00:49:51,876 --> 00:49:52,508
Okay.
735
00:50:05,106 --> 00:50:06,316
Dawn.
736
00:50:08,106 --> 00:50:09,316
It's me, Sookie.
737
00:50:11,485 --> 00:50:12,844
Honey, you overslept.
738
00:50:26,485 --> 00:50:27,844
Dawn.
739
00:50:31,417 --> 00:50:32,521
Are you here?
740
00:50:42,417 --> 00:50:48,521
Dawn.
Dawn.
741
00:50:52,417 --> 00:50:59,521
Isocrate: Hope you have enjoyed the episode :).
742
00:51:00,305 --> 00:51:06,908
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