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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:00,000 25.0 2 00:00:48,400 --> 00:00:51,360 {y:i}You see, after all is said and done... 3 00:00:52,280 --> 00:00:54,720 {y:i}the only thing you can be really sure of... 4 00:00:54,840 --> 00:00:58,160 {y:i}the only thing {y:i}you can really count on in this world... 5 00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:01,600 {y:i}is that you just never fucking know. 6 00:01:02,440 --> 00:01:04,480 {y:i}I bet the last thing {y:i}you were thinking about... 7 00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:06,560 {y:i}when you were tying your shoelaces {y:i}this morning... 8 00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:07,720 {y:i}was that there was a chance... 9 00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:10,480 {y:i}that by the end of the day, this day... 10 00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:13,600 {y:i}those same shoelaces {y:i}were going to be untied... 11 00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:16,120 {y:i}by somebody working {y:i}for the coroner's office. 12 00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:18,200 Am I right? 13 00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:20,320 I'm right, right? 14 00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:24,720 Hey! Get the fuck out of here! 15 00:01:25,960 --> 00:01:28,120 What, you wanna know about this? Get out of here! 16 00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:30,040 Take that shit to the dry cleaners. 17 00:01:30,600 --> 00:01:31,560 Now! 18 00:01:35,880 --> 00:01:38,240 Sorry. Long day. Where was I? 19 00:01:40,120 --> 00:01:43,440 You know, the human body is, like, 80% moisture, right? 20 00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:47,160 How much do you weigh? 165? 170? 21 00:01:49,160 --> 00:01:52,640 Now, I figure if you could somehow extract 80% of that... 22 00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:55,800 you'd have, give me a second... 23 00:01:57,040 --> 00:01:58,720 thirty-four pounds... 24 00:01:59,280 --> 00:02:01,160 of, like, solid... 25 00:02:02,120 --> 00:02:03,440 not meat... 26 00:02:04,360 --> 00:02:06,800 It'd be more like beef jerky, you know? 27 00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:10,200 But with hair and bones and teeth... 28 00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:12,760 shriveled-up tattoos and whatnot. 29 00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:15,720 Probably be like this big. 30 00:02:16,680 --> 00:02:19,920 In any event, you're starting to follow my drift here, "papi"? 31 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:23,280 Because somebody has some money that belongs to Louis. 32 00:02:24,920 --> 00:02:26,680 Is it you, perchance? 33 00:02:27,160 --> 00:02:30,520 Is it you that has some money that belongs to Louis? 34 00:02:30,680 --> 00:02:31,800 No. 35 00:02:34,080 --> 00:02:35,560 - No? Sure? - Yeah. 36 00:02:37,480 --> 00:02:39,360 I'm gonna start this thing and leave. 37 00:02:42,280 --> 00:02:44,560 What do you think? Permanent press or delicate? 38 00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:51,880 Wouldn't be appropriate if I asked you if you had change for a dollar. 39 00:02:52,200 --> 00:02:53,760 I got it. 40 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:55,720 Calm down. I just need four quarters. 41 00:02:55,760 --> 00:02:58,160 No. I got Louis' money. 42 00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:02,720 You got it. 43 00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:04,080 Yeah, I do. 44 00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:07,560 I got some of it, anyways. 45 00:03:11,080 --> 00:03:15,120 No, this isn't what we talked about. Now, this is... It was fucking simple. 46 00:03:15,200 --> 00:03:16,960 - You been breaking the contract. - Right. 47 00:03:17,040 --> 00:03:18,720 It's simple. I give you, you give me. 48 00:03:18,760 --> 00:03:20,840 You don't give me. It's a breach of contract. 49 00:03:20,920 --> 00:03:23,840 You're fucking up. What do you think I'm out here for? 50 00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:26,400 I'm asking you a question. What do you think I'm here for? 51 00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:29,360 - Louis, I'm scared now. - You're scared now? I don't give a fuck. 52 00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:31,720 I told you not to let this get out of control. 53 00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:34,080 What'd I tell you? I told you that, right? 54 00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:36,160 Listen, here's what you're gonna do for me: 55 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:39,680 You're gonna come see me tomorrow and you're going to bring me something. 56 00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:41,040 Okay, you hear me? 57 00:03:41,120 --> 00:03:43,280 - Yes, I do. - Something to scale, all right? 58 00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:46,360 Otherwise I can't talk to you no more. All right? 59 00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:49,920 I'm gonna have to send Gigli over. He's gonna have to settle up with you. 60 00:03:49,960 --> 00:03:52,400 You come to me tomorrow or he goes to you. Very simple. 61 00:03:52,480 --> 00:03:54,520 - I'll be here tomorrow. - That's good. 62 00:03:54,600 --> 00:03:56,600 - I'm not kidding. - Get the fuck out of here. 63 00:03:56,680 --> 00:03:59,120 - Okay. - Get the fuck... Go, you fucking... 64 00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:00,160 Fucking roach. 65 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:02,680 Fucking class of people. 66 00:04:03,240 --> 00:04:05,920 - I'm in Siberia around here. - I know. 67 00:04:05,960 --> 00:04:09,040 Fuck this city. I don't know how you guys cut it out here. 68 00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:11,240 It's Gigli, by the way. 69 00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:13,280 - What? - My name is... 70 00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:15,840 pronounced Gigli. It rhymes with really. 71 00:04:16,040 --> 00:04:18,040 - Is that right? Is that so? - Yeah. 72 00:04:18,280 --> 00:04:20,720 All right. I'll remember that for the next time, then. 73 00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:24,120 Meanwhile, you got something for me, Gigli? Rhymes with really. 74 00:04:25,200 --> 00:04:26,520 It's about half. 75 00:04:28,080 --> 00:04:29,880 - Half? - Half for today. 76 00:04:30,360 --> 00:04:33,640 Believe me, that's all the guy had. It's better than nothing. 77 00:04:34,280 --> 00:04:37,040 How about it's not better than nothing, you fucking idiot? 78 00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:40,040 Better is fuck the money then you hurt him as to spread the word. 79 00:04:40,120 --> 00:04:42,600 Since when are you authorized to make policy decisions? 80 00:04:42,680 --> 00:04:44,880 I'm sorry, Louis. I didn't know. 81 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:47,200 Are you all they got to offer around here? 82 00:04:47,240 --> 00:04:50,720 You're supposed to be this vicious, fucking mad dog. 83 00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:52,920 I'm sorry. 84 00:04:58,280 --> 00:04:59,240 Walk with me. 85 00:05:02,120 --> 00:05:03,600 There is a certain individual... 86 00:05:03,680 --> 00:05:08,000 who is creating very substantial difficulties for a dear friend of mine in New York. 87 00:05:08,480 --> 00:05:10,200 Now, this certain party... 88 00:05:10,840 --> 00:05:12,960 is very bullheaded and seems to be removed... 89 00:05:13,040 --> 00:05:15,800 from what I would like to call my sphere of influence. 90 00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:19,040 - All right, how can I help? - The plot needs a twist. 91 00:05:19,280 --> 00:05:22,760 The individual needs to be touched in some manner as to... 92 00:05:23,040 --> 00:05:26,520 convince him of the error of his ways before he can hurt other people... 93 00:05:26,600 --> 00:05:29,760 - particularly my friend from New York. - Right. 94 00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:33,680 Now, this certain individual, he's got... 95 00:05:34,720 --> 00:05:38,000 a beloved relative with certain psychological defects. 96 00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:43,280 I want the relative gotten, all right? 97 00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:46,280 And I want him, for the time being, held on to. 98 00:05:47,560 --> 00:05:50,640 Perhaps then reason can prevail. 99 00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:54,520 - You're following all this? - Yeah, all of it. 100 00:05:56,760 --> 00:05:57,840 Got it. 101 00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:27,280 All right. Wait. 102 00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:30,200 - Where is he? - Over there. 103 00:06:30,600 --> 00:06:32,200 Right there? That's him? 104 00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:34,720 All right. Thanks. 105 00:06:35,640 --> 00:06:38,800 I'm all right. You can go outside. I'm okay. Thanks. 106 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:04,720 Are you Brian? 107 00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:12,760 I know you're Brian. Your friend ratted you out back there. 108 00:07:13,360 --> 00:07:14,360 Hello? 109 00:07:19,080 --> 00:07:20,880 What are you eating there? What do you got? 110 00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:24,160 - What are those, polly seeds? - They're not. You're stupid. 111 00:07:25,160 --> 00:07:26,480 I'm stupid. 112 00:07:26,920 --> 00:07:30,440 - They look like polly seeds to me. - They're sunflower seeds. 113 00:07:30,560 --> 00:07:31,840 That's the same thing. 114 00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:33,960 We called them polly seeds when I was a kid. 115 00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:36,920 You must be the stupidest person, you piss-head, pisser-fucker. 116 00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:46,360 Me and you, we're supposed to go for a quick walk. You ready? 117 00:07:46,680 --> 00:07:49,000 We'll take a walk around the block. What do you say? 118 00:07:49,040 --> 00:07:50,880 I won't give anybody my seeds. 119 00:07:51,080 --> 00:07:53,160 Barry always asks why I don't give anybody any. 120 00:07:53,240 --> 00:07:56,920 Don't worry about it. Keep those. That's for you, okay? 121 00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:59,120 Let's go. We're gonna take a walk. Come on. 122 00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:00,720 What did that? 123 00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:03,240 He's kidding. 124 00:08:11,880 --> 00:08:14,320 Sorry about that. All right, look... 125 00:08:15,200 --> 00:08:16,280 it's real simple. 126 00:08:16,360 --> 00:08:18,760 You and I are gonna go outside and take a little walk. 127 00:08:18,840 --> 00:08:20,360 I won't grab you again, okay? 128 00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:24,040 I have to go to the Baywatch. 129 00:08:24,480 --> 00:08:25,600 I'm sorry, what? 130 00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:28,000 I have to go to the Baywatch. I was gonna go. 131 00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:30,360 You wanna watch "Baywatch"? 132 00:08:30,440 --> 00:08:32,320 Roll by my apartment, we'll turn on "Baywatch". 133 00:08:32,360 --> 00:08:35,080 You're the stupidest person. 134 00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:37,440 Not television. The Baywatch. 135 00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:40,560 The Baywatch? 136 00:08:40,680 --> 00:08:42,600 - Yeah, the Baywatch. - Okay. 137 00:08:45,760 --> 00:08:46,880 Can I go? 138 00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:54,160 - You wanna go now? - To the Baywatch. 139 00:08:55,440 --> 00:08:58,760 Yeah. I'm going there. I was on my way. 140 00:09:02,720 --> 00:09:04,080 - Yes, I would. - All right. 141 00:09:04,320 --> 00:09:05,920 Let's go. 142 00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:10,960 Come on, let's go. 143 00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:13,920 Okay, I gotta get my radio. 144 00:09:13,960 --> 00:09:16,040 - The music's gonna be good there. - Okay, good. 145 00:09:20,840 --> 00:09:22,040 Baywatch! 146 00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:24,480 Here we come. 147 00:09:24,520 --> 00:09:27,520 Wait a minute. You hear that, now? What is that? 148 00:09:28,440 --> 00:09:29,880 - You hear that? - No. 149 00:09:30,920 --> 00:09:33,160 Yep, it's my walkie-talkie calling. 150 00:09:34,280 --> 00:09:35,240 Yeah, hello? 151 00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:39,000 I told you, don't ever bother me again when I'm taking trips with my friends. 152 00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:43,280 What? No, we're going to the Baywatch. 153 00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:45,600 Yep, that's right, the Baywatch. 154 00:09:47,440 --> 00:09:49,760 No. Holy mackerel. 155 00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:53,280 Would you know when they'll be open again? 156 00:09:55,040 --> 00:09:57,040 We'll call you tomorrow for the update. 157 00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:01,800 How do you like that? Baywatch is closed today. 158 00:10:03,360 --> 00:10:05,880 - No. - Tomorrow we'll go. 159 00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:07,200 I can't believe it. 160 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:10,880 This always happens like that, right? When you plan a big trip. 161 00:10:16,720 --> 00:10:18,720 Hello there. P.O.B. 162 00:10:19,400 --> 00:10:20,640 What does that mean? 163 00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:22,400 P.O.B. Limo drivers say that. 164 00:10:22,640 --> 00:10:23,880 That's good. What does it mean? 165 00:10:24,360 --> 00:10:26,160 P.O.B. Passenger On Board. 166 00:10:26,720 --> 00:10:28,480 - Already? {y:i}- Yeah, already. 167 00:10:28,520 --> 00:10:30,520 That's good. You headed back to your place? 168 00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:32,480 - I am. {y:i}- Good. 169 00:10:32,720 --> 00:10:34,920 {y:i}- We'll talk later. - Yeah, we'll talk later. 170 00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:48,000 Come on in. It's all right. I don't bite. 171 00:10:54,480 --> 00:10:56,640 You hungry? I got food. 172 00:10:58,360 --> 00:10:59,720 You thirsty? 173 00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:01,920 I want a soda. 174 00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:05,120 You want a soda? I'm out of soda. Want a water? 175 00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:07,600 You want a water? I'll get you a water. 176 00:11:13,400 --> 00:11:15,520 All right. How is that? Good? 177 00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:26,520 - I wanna go home. - All right, you got to stay here for a little bit. 178 00:11:32,520 --> 00:11:33,760 No, I wanna go home. 179 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,560 No, we got to stay here. Can't do it right now. 180 00:11:36,680 --> 00:11:39,080 So maybe you wanna watch TV or cartoons? 181 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:41,480 I wanna go home. 182 00:11:42,480 --> 00:11:44,760 - We got to stay here. - No. 183 00:11:46,360 --> 00:11:48,160 Brian, what are you doing? 184 00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:49,800 - Take me home now. - Stop. 185 00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:53,040 - Fuck all of you! You stupid soup-fucker! - What? 186 00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:56,160 - Don't do that, motherfucker! - What's wrong with you? Cut that out. 187 00:11:57,200 --> 00:12:00,640 - Cut it out! Stop! Be quiet! - I'm going to the Baywatch. 188 00:12:06,640 --> 00:12:07,880 All right. 189 00:12:12,560 --> 00:12:13,680 Where are my seeds? 190 00:12:14,560 --> 00:12:16,280 They're sunflower seeds, idiot. 191 00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:18,560 They're right there. 192 00:12:20,520 --> 00:12:22,880 - They're sunflower seeds. - Behind you. Right there. 193 00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:36,160 Stay here. 194 00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:39,560 Everything's fine. Just kidding around. 195 00:12:51,600 --> 00:12:53,440 - Hello. - Hi. 196 00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:57,240 May I be of some assistance? 197 00:12:58,800 --> 00:13:00,680 Well, that remains to be seen. 198 00:13:01,440 --> 00:13:03,800 Look, I'm sorry to bother you. It's just... 199 00:13:03,880 --> 00:13:07,360 I was wondering if it wouldn't be too much trouble if I could use your phone. 200 00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:09,120 - That's... - Right. 201 00:13:09,200 --> 00:13:11,280 I just took a one-bedroom in the front... 202 00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:14,680 and I've been waiting all day for the phone company to come hook me up. 203 00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:17,120 - You know... - Yeah, it's just kind of a bad... 204 00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:21,440 It'll only take a second, I promise. You know, it's probably a local call. 205 00:13:22,840 --> 00:13:24,280 I can't. I'm sorry. 206 00:13:24,520 --> 00:13:27,480 I'll be in and out before you know it. I promise. 207 00:13:28,560 --> 00:13:30,480 Just leave a faint scent. 208 00:13:34,960 --> 00:13:36,720 Yeah, all right. Come on in. 209 00:13:37,280 --> 00:13:39,040 - Thank you. - Sure. 210 00:13:42,440 --> 00:13:43,760 The phone's right there. 211 00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:46,800 - I promise it'll only take a minute. - All right. 212 00:14:01,360 --> 00:14:02,360 Hello. 213 00:14:04,840 --> 00:14:07,040 What are you doing? Go sit down in the kitchen. 214 00:14:08,680 --> 00:14:11,160 These computer answering things, they drive me nuts. 215 00:14:12,240 --> 00:14:15,720 - You're making a telephone call. - Right, she's making a telephone call. 216 00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:18,200 Don't call Baywatch because they're closed today. 217 00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:20,080 I wouldn't think of it. 218 00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:39,880 I'm sorry, I got to ask. Do we know each other? 219 00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:42,400 Not yet. 220 00:14:45,040 --> 00:14:46,280 I'm Ricki. 221 00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:51,400 Larry Gigli, right? 222 00:14:52,320 --> 00:14:55,720 - I saw it on the mailbox. - Yeah, it's pronounced Gigli. 223 00:14:56,600 --> 00:14:58,000 Rhymes with really. 224 00:14:58,440 --> 00:15:01,720 - It's nice to meet you, Larry Gigli. - Nice to meet you, Larry. 225 00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:04,320 What's your name? 226 00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:07,680 Bob. 227 00:15:07,720 --> 00:15:10,280 - You're stupid. That's not my name. - That's not your name? 228 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:12,920 - What is your name, sweetie? - That's it. His name's Bob. 229 00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:15,160 - His name's not Bob. - Your name is Bob. 230 00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:17,280 Whatever your name is... 231 00:15:17,360 --> 00:15:20,720 has anyone ever told you you're a very handsome young man? 232 00:15:34,320 --> 00:15:36,000 Can I talk to you for a minute? 233 00:15:37,640 --> 00:15:38,720 Sure. 234 00:15:43,520 --> 00:15:44,800 In private. 235 00:15:51,400 --> 00:15:53,040 I can't fucking believe this. 236 00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:56,120 It's an unexpected bonus. Who'd have thought you were a babe magnet? 237 00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:59,360 - You're better than a dog. - You're a dog, you dog-head piss-fart! 238 00:15:59,400 --> 00:16:00,560 Whatever. 239 00:16:12,520 --> 00:16:15,040 You know, I heard you were a bit of a fuckup. 240 00:16:15,840 --> 00:16:20,040 But I gotta tell you, I'm frankly amazed at how much of a fuckup you actually are. 241 00:16:21,640 --> 00:16:24,160 - Am I missing something here? - It would seem so. 242 00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:27,520 Why don't you call Louis and he'll explain everything to you. 243 00:16:31,160 --> 00:16:33,000 I don't know that I know any Louis. 244 00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:37,200 Then I guess he hasn't called you to tell you he doesn't trust you... 245 00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:39,000 with a task of this magnitude. 246 00:16:39,880 --> 00:16:42,080 That he feels the stakes are too high. 247 00:16:42,760 --> 00:16:44,160 - Nope. - "Nope." 248 00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:47,160 I guess he also probably hasn't called to tell you... 249 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:51,080 that he'd feel more comfortable if there were two independent, unacquainted... 250 00:16:51,160 --> 00:16:53,960 perhaps even mutually hostile contractors working on this... 251 00:16:54,040 --> 00:16:56,720 so they could keep an eye on one another. 252 00:16:57,520 --> 00:17:00,360 Nope. There's no reason for you to take my word... 253 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:03,000 for precisely how second-rate he considers you. 254 00:17:03,200 --> 00:17:07,240 It'd probably make both our lives a lot easier if you just heard it directly from him. 255 00:17:10,760 --> 00:17:13,200 That's good stuff. I had that today. 256 00:17:14,440 --> 00:17:16,480 - Excuse me one minute. - Sure. 257 00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:21,440 Louis, you there? 258 00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:23,160 I'm here. What do you want? 259 00:17:24,360 --> 00:17:26,080 Yeah, there's this... 260 00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:28,960 young lady here trying to tell me that... 261 00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:30,600 All right, this thing is monumental. 262 00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:33,840 Certainly too big for a jerk-off like yourself, but I had no choice. 263 00:17:34,120 --> 00:17:37,080 {y:i}This thing represents my ass and my future. 264 00:17:37,160 --> 00:17:41,040 I want you to work with her and I want you to watch her as she will be watching you. 265 00:17:41,640 --> 00:17:42,920 I want you to know... 266 00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:45,440 that I will personally excoriate anyone responsible... 267 00:17:45,480 --> 00:17:47,600 for the tiniest fuckup in this action. 268 00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:50,280 {y:i}- And I want you to understand that. - Yes, Louis. 269 00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:52,840 "Yes, Louis"? 270 00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:56,440 Do you happen to know what "excoriate" means? 271 00:17:57,480 --> 00:17:59,200 It's not coming to me at the moment. 272 00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:02,600 It means "to strip or wear off the skin of... 273 00:18:02,920 --> 00:18:03,880 "to flay." 274 00:18:04,440 --> 00:18:08,280 {y:i}I'm learning a word a day. And it's critical {y:i}to use these words in conversation... 275 00:18:08,360 --> 00:18:10,760 but that's not why I used it in this conversation. 276 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:14,120 {y:i}In this conversation {y:i}I used it because I meant it. 277 00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:17,120 Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll be going now. 278 00:18:18,840 --> 00:18:22,080 All right, I'll talk to you later. Yeah, don't worry about it. 279 00:18:25,880 --> 00:18:28,080 Now don't get yourself all tied in a knot. 280 00:18:28,160 --> 00:18:30,600 Okay? I don't know this guy, and he doesn't know me. 281 00:18:30,680 --> 00:18:33,880 But my reputation apparently is pretty solid. 282 00:18:33,960 --> 00:18:37,200 So why don't you just get yourself straight... 283 00:18:37,280 --> 00:18:39,840 and we can put this whole thing behind us. 284 00:18:39,960 --> 00:18:43,440 And if you have any decaffeinated or herbal tea... 285 00:18:43,520 --> 00:18:45,320 I would really be most appreciative. 286 00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:47,240 - I want tea. - Two teas. 287 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:50,920 Let me tell you something, okay? 288 00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:54,880 I don't know who the fuck you think you are, but I don't work like this. 289 00:18:54,960 --> 00:18:56,160 You got that? 290 00:18:56,520 --> 00:18:58,440 If you wanna talk about reputations... 291 00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:02,280 and if by some fucking miracle long shot you haven't heard of my reputation... 292 00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:04,160 let me tell you who the fuck I am. 293 00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:08,800 I am the fucking Sultan of Slick, Sadie. I am the Rule of fucking Cool. 294 00:19:09,160 --> 00:19:11,360 You wanna be a gangster? You wanna be a thug? 295 00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:15,360 You sit at my fucking feet. Gather the pearls that emanate forth from me. 296 00:19:15,840 --> 00:19:19,800 Because I'm the fucking original, straight-first-foremost, pimp-mack... 297 00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:23,320 fucking hustler, original gangster's gangster. 298 00:19:27,560 --> 00:19:30,640 I don't know what you're talking about, but I'm gonna get my stuff. 299 00:19:33,120 --> 00:19:36,440 And don't you worry your little gangster's gangster head about it... 300 00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:37,640 I can manage. 301 00:19:39,560 --> 00:19:43,200 How many cups of your own spit you think you swallow every day, Larry? 302 00:19:46,040 --> 00:19:47,720 I think about 35 cups. 303 00:19:48,080 --> 00:19:50,520 - Would you just shut the fuck up. - You're an idiot! 304 00:19:52,840 --> 00:19:54,680 - What is it with you? - No, you. 305 00:19:54,840 --> 00:19:57,200 - What, you just go in and out? - You're an idiot. 306 00:19:57,280 --> 00:20:01,120 - What the fuck are you talking about? - You're the fuck, you stupid duck-fuck. 307 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:03,960 Do me a favor and just act fucking normal for a minute. 308 00:20:04,040 --> 00:20:05,600 - Looks like... - Just for a minute. 309 00:20:05,640 --> 00:20:07,720 You'll end up with Elliot over there. 310 00:20:07,800 --> 00:20:10,720 I know you understand what I'm talking about. Fucking be normal. 311 00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:13,760 - I'm telling you... - Not fucking crazy! Normal! 312 00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:16,040 How about if I smack you in the fucking head? 313 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:20,040 Leave him alone. We're supposed to watch him, not slap him around. 314 00:20:20,120 --> 00:20:22,160 Don't tell me what we're supposed to do. 315 00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:24,640 How about this? You leave him alone or I'll kill you. 316 00:20:24,720 --> 00:20:27,640 You'll kill me? Fuck you! Go ahead. 317 00:20:28,440 --> 00:20:29,880 I'll kill you. 318 00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:33,640 You don't tell me what to do. Okay? 319 00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:37,000 Don't tell me what we might do. Don't tell me what we're supposed to do. 320 00:20:37,080 --> 00:20:40,800 Don't tell me what we maybe should do. Don't ever tell me nothing! 321 00:20:42,560 --> 00:20:45,920 I'll tell you this, you leave him alone or I'll kill you. 322 00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:51,560 I'm gonna say 35 cups. I'm gonna say 35 cups of spit. 323 00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:56,600 I'm a genius. I'm a genius, man. 324 00:21:01,080 --> 00:21:03,440 - What's he talking about? - I don't know. 325 00:21:05,600 --> 00:21:09,480 Look, why don't we try and make this pleasant. 326 00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:15,480 Nice. 327 00:21:18,120 --> 00:21:19,120 Easy. 328 00:21:29,120 --> 00:21:31,320 So, what do you normally hire out for? 329 00:21:31,880 --> 00:21:33,920 I do jobs of various types. 330 00:21:35,880 --> 00:21:37,920 - How about yourself? - Me, too. 331 00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:41,400 I do various types of jobs of various kinds. 332 00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:44,160 There you have it. 333 00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:48,680 How come I never seen you around before? 334 00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:51,400 I'm from another place. 335 00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:54,520 Where would that be, Ricki? 336 00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:57,840 Somewhere else, Larry. 337 00:21:58,760 --> 00:22:00,800 Okay. I see. 338 00:22:03,400 --> 00:22:07,160 - And my name's not really Ricki. - And what would it be, then? 339 00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:15,520 Then how about I keep calling you Ricki just to piss you off? 340 00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:18,200 - Lf it'll make you happy. - Yeah, it will. 341 00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:25,840 - This isn't very good food. - Too bad. That's your dinner. Eat it. 342 00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:28,160 - I'm hungry. - Fuck. 343 00:22:32,320 --> 00:22:34,560 - He said he's hungry. - So? Let him eat his food. 344 00:22:34,600 --> 00:22:37,120 - I don't like this food. - Too bad! Eat your food, stupid! 345 00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:40,520 Back off! God! It's not his fault. 346 00:22:40,560 --> 00:22:42,960 Yeah, it's not my fault I'm brain-damaged. 347 00:22:45,000 --> 00:22:47,400 Beautiful. What are you, his shop steward? 348 00:22:47,640 --> 00:22:49,320 Listen, you fucking retard, eat your... 349 00:22:49,400 --> 00:22:50,920 - Enough! Easy already. - Not enough. 350 00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:52,840 - What is your... - Let me tell you something. 351 00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:55,840 In every relationship there's a bull and a cow. 352 00:22:55,920 --> 00:22:59,240 It so happens that in this relationship right here with me and you... 353 00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:01,880 I'm the bull, you're the cow. 354 00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:04,840 All right? Bull. Cow. 355 00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:07,880 - You got that? - Yeah, I got it. Bull, cow. 356 00:23:08,120 --> 00:23:11,120 You make him something else to eat. Otherwise, mind your business. 357 00:23:11,200 --> 00:23:12,480 I wanna go home. 358 00:23:14,120 --> 00:23:15,160 You can't go home. 359 00:23:15,640 --> 00:23:17,720 - I wanna go home. - You can't go home right now! 360 00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:20,360 - Eat your food! - Piss you! I want to go home! 361 00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:30,480 How you gonna go to the Baywatch tomorrow if you go home? 362 00:23:33,720 --> 00:23:36,080 This is your spot. Yeah? 363 00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:39,840 It's nice. Come on. Lie down. 364 00:23:45,120 --> 00:23:46,400 This is a couch. 365 00:23:46,640 --> 00:23:50,280 Don't worry about it. It's fine. It's a good sleeping place. Lie down. 366 00:23:56,720 --> 00:23:58,120 Larry, read to me. 367 00:23:59,360 --> 00:24:02,080 - What? - Read to me, Larry. 368 00:24:02,920 --> 00:24:04,560 Read to him, Larry. 369 00:24:05,160 --> 00:24:08,160 I don't wanna read to him. What do I got to read to him for? 370 00:24:08,240 --> 00:24:09,440 Read to me, Larry. 371 00:24:09,520 --> 00:24:11,840 - What for? - It soothes me down. 372 00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:16,280 - It soothes you down? - Come on, Larry, read to him. 373 00:24:16,400 --> 00:24:20,000 - What am I gonna read? I got nothing here. - Read him a book. 374 00:24:27,320 --> 00:24:28,840 You don't have a book? 375 00:24:31,560 --> 00:24:34,280 - I got a phone book. - There you go. 376 00:24:35,120 --> 00:24:37,960 - Read to me, Larry. - All right, fine. 377 00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:45,960 Here you go. 378 00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:48,160 "Since 1868. 379 00:24:49,520 --> 00:24:53,040 "For well over a century, the adventurous flavor of Tabasco sauce... 380 00:24:53,120 --> 00:24:55,720 "has fired up generations of thrill-seekers." 381 00:24:56,200 --> 00:24:58,200 - Okay? - That was good. 382 00:24:59,200 --> 00:25:00,480 Read to me more. 383 00:25:05,480 --> 00:25:09,920 "Lts all-natural ingredients and unique aging process in white oak barrels... 384 00:25:10,240 --> 00:25:13,000 "keeps Tabasco on the culinary cutting edge. 385 00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:20,640 "Try it on eggs, pizza, salads, and any other food... 386 00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:24,160 "for a burst of flavor that will tantalize your taste buds." That's it. 387 00:25:24,200 --> 00:25:25,400 - Read to me more. - That's it. 388 00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:27,560 I'm not reading the ingredients. I'm done. 389 00:25:28,360 --> 00:25:31,200 - Okay, thank you, Larry. - Sure. 390 00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:52,640 Tell you what, no offense... 391 00:25:52,840 --> 00:25:55,240 you don't look like any contractor I ever met. 392 00:25:57,200 --> 00:26:00,320 Apparently, there's a need for all types. 393 00:26:06,240 --> 00:26:07,520 So listen. 394 00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:10,960 You know, I was thinking about what you said before... 395 00:26:11,240 --> 00:26:14,560 about us being stuck in this situation. There's nothing we can do. 396 00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:17,440 I think you're right. We might as well make the best of it. 397 00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:19,440 I think so. 398 00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:23,880 So, you know, look, don't take this the wrong way, believe me. 399 00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:26,960 But I just... This is, you know... 400 00:26:27,160 --> 00:26:30,800 I hate to see you sleep on the floor like that. I mean, come on. 401 00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:34,400 So if you want to, you can go ahead and just, you know... 402 00:26:35,600 --> 00:26:37,000 just take half of my bed. 403 00:26:39,720 --> 00:26:42,200 'Cause we're working together. We're grownups, right? 404 00:26:42,280 --> 00:26:44,840 You know, we're partners. We'll just... 405 00:26:45,800 --> 00:26:47,520 do the whole thing professionally. 406 00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:55,840 That's very kind of you. Thank you. I mean, I'd love to. 407 00:26:57,960 --> 00:26:59,880 You know, professionally. 408 00:27:00,800 --> 00:27:01,920 Please. 409 00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:05,560 How's that professionally? You like that? 410 00:27:06,640 --> 00:27:08,000 That's professional. Right here. 411 00:27:08,040 --> 00:27:11,360 Bull. Cow. That's how that works. 412 00:27:16,640 --> 00:27:19,680 There's your bull right there! There's your bull. 413 00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:21,640 There's the horn. 414 00:27:22,040 --> 00:27:24,880 You fuck with the bull, you get the horn. 415 00:27:30,520 --> 00:27:32,200 That's professional. 416 00:27:34,320 --> 00:27:36,040 Fucking professional. 417 00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:38,360 Look at that. 418 00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:41,720 That's the bull. Right. 419 00:27:42,720 --> 00:27:45,240 Get the bull by the horn. You know what I'm talking about? 420 00:27:45,320 --> 00:27:48,160 I'll give you the horn. Want to see the horn? 421 00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:52,680 You know... 422 00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:55,640 you're actually a very attractive woman. 423 00:28:58,440 --> 00:28:59,400 Thank you. 424 00:29:00,560 --> 00:29:02,040 You're welcome. 425 00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:05,760 You know, this may be a good time to suggest... 426 00:29:05,800 --> 00:29:09,440 that you not allow the seeds of cruel hope to sprout in your soul. 427 00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:13,920 I don't know what that means, but it sounds beautiful. 428 00:29:14,760 --> 00:29:16,800 It means you're not my type. 429 00:29:19,120 --> 00:29:20,560 Is that right? 430 00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:25,000 What about me is not your type? 431 00:29:29,360 --> 00:29:30,520 Your penis. 432 00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:33,120 What does that mean? 433 00:29:34,960 --> 00:29:36,520 It means I'm gay. 434 00:29:37,560 --> 00:29:39,360 It means I'm a lesbian. 435 00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:45,000 But I got to tell you, if I wasn't... 436 00:29:46,120 --> 00:29:49,280 I mean, after a first date like this, I'd find it really hard... 437 00:29:50,040 --> 00:29:53,720 not to just get under the covers and do you bigtime right now. 438 00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:56,160 Good night. 439 00:30:00,960 --> 00:30:02,240 "Good night"? 440 00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:20,920 {y:i}Whoa, Step-papa. {y:i}With that sassy new look... 441 00:30:21,040 --> 00:30:24,000 {y:i}sheep's all that and a bag of chips. 442 00:30:34,040 --> 00:30:36,760 {y:i}Melbourne's forecast. ; {y:i}The chance of a brief shower tomorrow... 443 00:30:36,840 --> 00:30:40,720 {y:i}but we're expecting a mostly fine day with {y:i}a light-to-moderate southwestwardly wind. 444 00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:42,360 Who the fuck are you talking to? 445 00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:45,280 {y:i}Sydney also fine and 18. {y:i}Brisbane, showers... 446 00:30:45,320 --> 00:30:46,360 Give me that back, please. 447 00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:47,920 {y:i}- Sunny, 32. - Give me that. 448 00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:51,440 {y:i}Adelaide and Hobart both {y:i}mainly fine days tomorrow. Around our... 449 00:30:51,560 --> 00:30:53,280 You know how much this shit costs? 450 00:30:56,000 --> 00:30:58,560 - It's $5. - No, it's not $5. 451 00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:02,080 - It's $10. - No, it's... 452 00:31:04,840 --> 00:31:07,080 Why am I even talking to you for? 453 00:31:07,160 --> 00:31:09,360 - It's $10. - Yeah, it's $10. All right. 454 00:31:19,240 --> 00:31:23,920 Just wanted to tell you, you know, just get straight about that thing last night. 455 00:31:24,800 --> 00:31:26,800 You know, no hard feelings. 456 00:31:27,120 --> 00:31:30,080 You know what I mean? I don't want you to get upset or nothing. 457 00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:37,440 That's it. Don't be coming back, though. I mean, it's a one-time offer. 458 00:31:38,240 --> 00:31:40,160 One shot with me. I'm out. 459 00:31:44,520 --> 00:31:46,280 Are you expecting somebody? 460 00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:51,720 Come on! 461 00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:55,320 - Larry! - Shit! 462 00:31:55,600 --> 00:31:57,560 - It's your mother. - Fuck! It's a cop. 463 00:31:58,560 --> 00:31:59,840 Open the door! 464 00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:02,840 - I was watching that. - Be quiet. 465 00:32:02,920 --> 00:32:05,600 Go in this room. Go. I want you to stay here. 466 00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:08,360 - Don't come out. Don't say anything. - We're going to Baywatch? 467 00:32:08,440 --> 00:32:10,360 - Yeah. Soon. Stay here. Be quiet. - Okay. 468 00:32:10,440 --> 00:32:12,640 - Come on, I'm dying here! - Coming! 469 00:32:14,120 --> 00:32:16,000 - Larry, I have a chicken. - Don't say anything. 470 00:32:18,120 --> 00:32:19,040 What? 471 00:32:19,120 --> 00:32:22,440 Your door's not thick enough to pretend you're not home when you're home. 472 00:32:22,480 --> 00:32:25,240 - What's up? - I was in the neighborhood. 473 00:32:27,120 --> 00:32:29,600 - How are you today? - Just fine. Yourself? 474 00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:31,240 Just fine. 475 00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:35,280 I'm searching for news on the underground. 476 00:32:37,720 --> 00:32:39,760 Might you know what it is I'm getting at? 477 00:32:40,840 --> 00:32:42,880 - No. - No. Well... 478 00:32:43,840 --> 00:32:46,680 This is one of those mysterious cases. 479 00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:51,040 Unsolvable. Probably turn out to be an alien abduction, but you know... 480 00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:54,800 we're obligated to at least create the appearance of due diligence. 481 00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:56,960 - What? - I didn't say nothing. 482 00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:00,760 You know, your friend Louis... 483 00:33:03,720 --> 00:33:08,120 his supervisor back in the home office is about to fold his napkin, right? 484 00:33:08,840 --> 00:33:11,240 - Sorry? - Starkman, in New York. 485 00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:13,400 He's through. 486 00:33:13,760 --> 00:33:17,800 Looking at huge federal time. Big, ugly, dark dungeon underground. 487 00:33:17,880 --> 00:33:20,960 No chance of parole, never ever. Time. 488 00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:27,880 Yep. I'm sorry to say. 489 00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:30,920 I hear he's a good guy, but, you know... 490 00:33:31,840 --> 00:33:33,600 In any event, here's my problem... 491 00:33:33,640 --> 00:33:37,240 and if you know any of this, feel free, jump in, shut me up. 492 00:33:37,760 --> 00:33:40,800 This federal prosecutor out here... 493 00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:45,000 the one with Starkman's testicular matter clutched in his fist... 494 00:33:45,400 --> 00:33:47,960 this very federal prosecutor's little brother... 495 00:33:48,920 --> 00:33:50,720 Any of this sound familiar? 496 00:33:51,760 --> 00:33:53,040 To me? No. 497 00:33:53,800 --> 00:33:55,120 No. Well... 498 00:33:55,840 --> 00:33:59,520 This very federal prosecutor's little brother, a bit dopey from what I gather... 499 00:33:59,560 --> 00:34:01,320 may have been absconded with... 500 00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:06,120 which, as you can imagine, would be to the dismay of our prosecutor. 501 00:34:09,960 --> 00:34:11,120 I think... 502 00:34:11,720 --> 00:34:15,560 But I could be wrong about this because it's almost too stupid for a mind to grasp. 503 00:34:15,640 --> 00:34:18,520 But I think maybe someone... 504 00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:21,800 in your professional community... 505 00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:25,000 might be participating in these shenanigans... 506 00:34:25,520 --> 00:34:27,480 to, I don't know... 507 00:34:27,560 --> 00:34:31,040 help squeeze a little friendship... 508 00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:34,440 altruism, whatever, out of this particular federal official. 509 00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:37,200 Maybe in the hopes that Starkman... 510 00:34:37,880 --> 00:34:40,920 will wake up one morning... 511 00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:49,240 And wake up one morning to find all charges mysteriously dropped. 512 00:34:50,040 --> 00:34:53,880 The school of thought of my colleagues is that this kid is already way out of town. 513 00:34:53,960 --> 00:34:58,560 I alone am of the opposite school. I think he's still here. That's what I think. 514 00:34:58,880 --> 00:35:01,720 But what's important is what you think. What do you think? 515 00:35:01,800 --> 00:35:05,120 As a friend who's got his ear to the street. Seriously. 516 00:35:06,960 --> 00:35:09,000 - I never... You know... - I know. 517 00:35:09,640 --> 00:35:11,480 You don't know nothing. 518 00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:14,600 I can tell just by looking at you. 519 00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:24,760 The whole thing's probably alien abduction, like I said before. 520 00:35:29,640 --> 00:35:32,040 Man, you know what I'd love to do... 521 00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:34,280 right now? 522 00:35:40,840 --> 00:35:43,040 Go down to Marie Callender's... 523 00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:46,720 get me a big bowl, pie, some ice cream on it. 524 00:35:48,200 --> 00:35:49,240 Good. 525 00:35:49,600 --> 00:35:51,480 Put some on your head... 526 00:35:51,680 --> 00:35:55,200 your tongue would slap your brains out trying to get to it. 527 00:35:55,720 --> 00:35:56,800 Interested? 528 00:35:58,080 --> 00:35:59,120 Sure? 529 00:36:00,360 --> 00:36:03,120 Yeah, I'm trying to get in shape, you know. 530 00:36:23,560 --> 00:36:24,880 Say no more. 531 00:36:28,160 --> 00:36:30,160 Thanks for the hospitality. 532 00:36:31,000 --> 00:36:35,240 It can't be the most pleasant thing to have your privacy be intruded on. 533 00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:37,680 Maybe if you hear anything, you'll let me know? 534 00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:42,400 Yeah, you know, if I hear anything. 535 00:36:48,240 --> 00:36:50,120 Yeah, I'll let you know. 536 00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:10,240 All right. 537 00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:16,720 A federal fucking prosecutor! 538 00:37:18,240 --> 00:37:19,880 - Fuck! - Larry? 539 00:37:20,520 --> 00:37:23,720 - I'll come back now, okay? - What are you doing? I told you to... 540 00:37:24,240 --> 00:37:27,080 - I'm hungry. - We got nothing to eat. 541 00:37:27,440 --> 00:37:30,760 - I'm hungry, though. - A federal fucking prosecutor. 542 00:37:31,640 --> 00:37:35,280 - My brother's a federal fucking "prostitutor." - You don't say. 543 00:37:39,720 --> 00:37:41,080 Put this on. 544 00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:45,840 - Did you know about all that stuff? - No, not all of it. 545 00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:48,160 - Maybe we should check into a hotel. - Fuck that. 546 00:37:48,240 --> 00:37:49,480 I live here. This is my place. 547 00:37:49,560 --> 00:37:52,120 No one's getting me out of my place. Put this on, too. 548 00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:55,920 - I'm hungry. I wanna eat. - I heard you the first fucking five times. 549 00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:01,440 Come on. 550 00:38:03,680 --> 00:38:04,920 Fucking around. 551 00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:08,320 When are we getting to the Baywatch? 552 00:38:09,360 --> 00:38:11,520 - What? What's that? You hear that? - No. 553 00:38:11,560 --> 00:38:14,160 What is that? It's the walkie-talkie again. 554 00:38:14,960 --> 00:38:16,920 Hello? What? 555 00:38:18,120 --> 00:38:21,680 You got to be kidding me. Again? What's the deal with these guys? 556 00:38:22,280 --> 00:38:24,480 How long? Maybe tomorrow? Okay. 557 00:38:24,600 --> 00:38:26,800 Kick those guys in the ass for me, will you? 558 00:38:27,200 --> 00:38:29,000 Those fucking guys. All right. 559 00:38:29,160 --> 00:38:31,120 Talk to you later. Give us a call back. 560 00:38:32,520 --> 00:38:33,920 Unbelievable. 561 00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:37,080 You believe that? The Baywatch is closed today. Again. 562 00:38:37,200 --> 00:38:39,040 - They're closed? - Yeah, I talked to them. 563 00:38:39,120 --> 00:38:41,800 They said they're working on the problem, but, you know... 564 00:38:41,960 --> 00:38:44,400 they don't know how long it's gonna be. 565 00:38:44,480 --> 00:38:46,000 What is the Baywatch? 566 00:38:48,160 --> 00:38:51,880 It's where all the beautiful girls are. They swim. 567 00:38:53,320 --> 00:38:54,520 They swim there. 568 00:38:54,920 --> 00:38:59,000 - You're talking about the TV show? - No, you... Not TV. That's TV. 569 00:39:00,080 --> 00:39:03,840 The Baywatch is where they really are. They're really there. 570 00:39:05,360 --> 00:39:07,760 I think you could be friends there. 571 00:39:13,720 --> 00:39:17,120 I think that's where the sex is. I think so. 572 00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:53,320 - Hey, you wanna turn that down? - You fucking turn it down. 573 00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:59,840 I don't think this is the best time to be drawing attention to ourselves. 574 00:40:03,080 --> 00:40:07,680 - Hey, Beavis, turn the fucking radio off. - What the fuck is your problem, bitch? 575 00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:09,760 "Bitch"? 576 00:40:09,880 --> 00:40:12,920 You know what, creating a scene right now would be a bad thing. 577 00:40:15,080 --> 00:40:18,240 Yeah, that's right. Why don't you come here so we can kick your ass. 578 00:40:24,120 --> 00:40:25,560 What happened? 579 00:40:26,160 --> 00:40:27,760 Let me. Okay? 580 00:40:30,360 --> 00:40:31,360 Go ahead. 581 00:40:32,640 --> 00:40:36,360 You know, what you boys need is to develop better people skills. 582 00:40:36,640 --> 00:40:39,120 However, in the meantime... 583 00:40:41,720 --> 00:40:43,000 Excuse me. 584 00:40:46,680 --> 00:40:48,320 You ever heard of Tai Moi Chai? 585 00:40:49,120 --> 00:40:50,560 No. Okay. 586 00:40:51,000 --> 00:40:55,400 In traditional Tai Moi Chai, there are five levels of digital orb extrusion. 587 00:40:56,080 --> 00:40:58,720 That's the gouging out of your opponent's eyeball... 588 00:40:59,400 --> 00:41:01,000 with one's finger. 589 00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:05,920 The highest and most difficult to master is my personal favorite: 590 00:41:06,200 --> 00:41:07,240 "Kai Toi Mai". 591 00:41:07,320 --> 00:41:10,720 Loosely translated, that's "the rip that takes the past." 592 00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:13,960 Now, once the thumb liquefies the eye... 593 00:41:14,800 --> 00:41:18,200 it is deftly and immediately replaced by the forefinger. 594 00:41:18,680 --> 00:41:22,320 Deep thrust, hooking around and securing the ocular nerve... 595 00:41:23,080 --> 00:41:25,640 and then removing it with such force... 596 00:41:26,280 --> 00:41:30,400 as to bring with it, by suction, a vital portion of the visual cortex. 597 00:41:31,320 --> 00:41:35,080 The part of the brain, as I'm sure you may know, that stores visual memory. 598 00:41:37,400 --> 00:41:39,440 The extraordinary element of this move... 599 00:41:41,400 --> 00:41:43,040 the genius of it... 600 00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:46,320 the absolute poetry of it... 601 00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:49,920 is that, aside from the obvious wound... 602 00:41:50,560 --> 00:41:54,520 one's opponent is left with no memory of anything he has ever seen. 603 00:41:55,400 --> 00:41:58,040 Family, friends, nothing. 604 00:41:59,800 --> 00:42:01,960 Hence, "Kai Toi Mai": 605 00:42:04,160 --> 00:42:05,920 "The rip that takes the past." 606 00:42:07,680 --> 00:42:10,880 As you can imagine, very difficult to practice in the United States... 607 00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:14,840 but I felt well worth the trips to the Chang Rai Province. 608 00:42:20,640 --> 00:42:22,040 People skills. 609 00:42:23,240 --> 00:42:25,760 See, knowing how to properly judge character... 610 00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:27,400 knowing how and when to make a move... 611 00:42:27,480 --> 00:42:29,960 in short, knowing who to and who not to fuck with. 612 00:42:32,240 --> 00:42:35,960 These are things you boys are gonna wanna work on in the future. Okay? 613 00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:37,560 And one more thing: 614 00:42:37,640 --> 00:42:40,960 Sports are all well and good, but very hard to earn a living at. 615 00:42:41,040 --> 00:42:44,800 So I want you guys to study hard and keep your grades up, all right? 616 00:42:45,320 --> 00:42:47,280 - Okay? Everyone, yes? - Yes. 617 00:42:47,360 --> 00:42:48,640 Okay. Good. 618 00:42:53,040 --> 00:42:54,720 Brian, let's go. 619 00:43:03,840 --> 00:43:05,240 Nice computer. 620 00:43:08,040 --> 00:43:10,440 Here's suck-my-dick. Com. 621 00:43:17,720 --> 00:43:20,480 So can you really do all that kung fu shit... 622 00:43:20,640 --> 00:43:23,000 you said back there with the eye and that? 623 00:43:24,600 --> 00:43:25,560 No. 624 00:43:26,960 --> 00:43:28,760 That was all bullshit? 625 00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:35,120 Sun Tzu said that in a war... 626 00:43:35,680 --> 00:43:38,400 the best victory is that which requires no battle. 627 00:43:39,080 --> 00:43:42,120 - Is this some more bullshit now I'm getting? - No. 628 00:43:42,600 --> 00:43:43,720 Who's Sun Tzu? 629 00:43:45,200 --> 00:43:48,080 A Chinese military theoretician who pointed out... 630 00:43:48,480 --> 00:43:52,360 that in a conflict, getting angry, which you seem to do a lot of... 631 00:43:52,520 --> 00:43:55,280 is a tactically and strategically stupid move. 632 00:43:55,600 --> 00:43:59,880 It clouds your ability to reason. It gives your adversary the upper hand. 633 00:44:00,720 --> 00:44:03,240 You wanna cloud your adversary's ability to reason... 634 00:44:03,320 --> 00:44:05,800 thus gaining the upper hand yourself. 635 00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:10,560 Whatever. 636 00:44:11,440 --> 00:44:13,400 You know, given how unhappy you seem to be... 637 00:44:13,480 --> 00:44:16,400 I can see how that wouldn't be the easiest thing for you to do. 638 00:44:16,840 --> 00:44:19,560 - What is that supposed to mean? - Just that. 639 00:44:20,760 --> 00:44:21,960 I mean... 640 00:44:22,600 --> 00:44:26,200 when men are boys, they're encouraged not to cry, not to show their sadness... 641 00:44:26,280 --> 00:44:30,320 so they're forced to find other ways to let those feelings out. As I'm sure you know... 642 00:44:30,400 --> 00:44:34,560 fighting and getting angry are much more acceptable male behaviors. 643 00:44:35,040 --> 00:44:39,160 So when these boys grow up, guess what outlet they use to express their sadness. 644 00:44:39,720 --> 00:44:42,560 A guy who's miserable at work or depressed about his life... 645 00:44:42,600 --> 00:44:44,560 comes home at night, what does he do? 646 00:44:45,840 --> 00:44:49,080 He doesn't usually cry in front of the wife and kids. 647 00:44:49,440 --> 00:44:51,320 He usually yells at them. 648 00:44:56,200 --> 00:44:57,600 So, Larry... 649 00:44:58,760 --> 00:44:59,800 What? 650 00:45:00,960 --> 00:45:03,240 What is it exactly you're so sad about? 651 00:45:05,600 --> 00:45:07,120 No, I'm serious. 652 00:45:18,320 --> 00:45:20,680 Yeah. What about your friend? 653 00:45:21,320 --> 00:45:23,720 Mrs. Leonard. Whatever her name is. 654 00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:30,800 Look, I can't right now, I'm sorry. It's not a good time. 655 00:45:31,080 --> 00:45:33,560 It's not a good time, Ma, that's why. 656 00:45:34,520 --> 00:45:35,480 No. 657 00:45:36,160 --> 00:45:38,360 Okay. All right! 658 00:45:39,240 --> 00:45:42,160 What do you want, blood? I said okay. I'm coming over, all right? 659 00:45:42,240 --> 00:45:43,600 I'll be right over there. 660 00:45:46,400 --> 00:45:49,720 I got to make a quick detour. You can stay in the car. 661 00:45:51,640 --> 00:45:53,440 Easy. A little lower. 662 00:45:54,080 --> 00:45:56,080 - Right here? - A little bit higher. 663 00:45:56,240 --> 00:45:57,440 - A little lower. - Ma. 664 00:46:00,160 --> 00:46:02,120 All right, right there. God. 665 00:46:02,760 --> 00:46:06,520 Look, Ma, if Mrs. Leonard isn't around, you'll have to call a doctor sometimes. 666 00:46:06,600 --> 00:46:09,720 I can't just drop everything and show up here all the time, okay? 667 00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:12,160 What, and I didn't drop everything for you? 668 00:46:12,760 --> 00:46:15,520 "I'm so sorry, Larry, I can't change your diaper now. 669 00:46:15,560 --> 00:46:18,240 "You're gonna have to call Mrs. Leonard." 670 00:46:19,240 --> 00:46:21,440 - Let me just... - Let me. Hold on. 671 00:46:30,160 --> 00:46:31,680 - What? - He's got to pee. 672 00:46:32,040 --> 00:46:33,240 I got to pee, Larry. 673 00:46:34,560 --> 00:46:36,360 I thought I told you to wait in the car. 674 00:46:36,440 --> 00:46:39,840 I thought you'd prefer it if we came in rather than take the car somewhere. 675 00:46:39,920 --> 00:46:42,440 Wouldn't want you to think we lammed out on you. 676 00:46:42,600 --> 00:46:44,720 Besides, I want to meet your mother. 677 00:46:45,680 --> 00:46:48,360 - No. - Larry, are those friends of yours? 678 00:46:50,920 --> 00:46:53,800 - Yeah, close, personal. - Well, invite them in. 679 00:46:54,280 --> 00:46:55,880 I got to pee, Larry. 680 00:46:56,000 --> 00:46:59,680 - Larry, invite them in! - I am, Ma, all right? 681 00:47:07,960 --> 00:47:10,120 - Hello, everybody. - Hello. 682 00:47:10,800 --> 00:47:12,080 My God. 683 00:47:13,280 --> 00:47:14,880 - What a beauty. - Ma. 684 00:47:15,080 --> 00:47:16,920 What? I'm just saying. 685 00:47:17,320 --> 00:47:19,480 You should see some of the pigs he's brought by. 686 00:47:19,560 --> 00:47:21,440 I mean, not that they were pigs, per se. 687 00:47:21,480 --> 00:47:26,160 It's just that, by and large, they were what I would call insignificant women. 688 00:47:27,000 --> 00:47:30,560 You, I could tell right off the bat, you seem to be of some substance. 689 00:47:31,480 --> 00:47:35,440 - Excuse me, miss, where's the men's room? - Right this way, darling. 690 00:47:36,320 --> 00:47:39,880 Larry, she's gorgeous. Don't you fuck this one up. 691 00:47:41,960 --> 00:47:45,080 - So, what is your story, honey? - I'm Larry's friend. 692 00:47:45,160 --> 00:47:47,720 - Don't pay no attention to her. - She thinks I'm beautiful. 693 00:47:47,800 --> 00:47:50,200 Yeah. She's blind in one eye, though. 694 00:47:50,360 --> 00:47:51,680 Open the door. 695 00:47:53,520 --> 00:47:54,800 You all right in there? 696 00:47:55,400 --> 00:47:57,480 So this is where you grew up? 697 00:47:58,440 --> 00:48:00,280 Are you writing a book? 698 00:48:09,440 --> 00:48:13,040 - Ma. - Shut up. I didn't say anything. 699 00:48:14,640 --> 00:48:17,360 I think you two make a very cute couple, though. 700 00:48:17,440 --> 00:48:18,840 - Ma. - What? 701 00:48:18,920 --> 00:48:21,800 What's with the "Ma"? 702 00:48:21,880 --> 00:48:23,320 Stop already with the "Ma." 703 00:48:24,920 --> 00:48:26,560 So, tell me... 704 00:48:27,520 --> 00:48:28,920 are you and Larry sweethearts? 705 00:48:29,000 --> 00:48:32,960 Before you answer, let me say up front that I hope so. 706 00:48:33,640 --> 00:48:35,720 What? Yes, I hope so. 707 00:48:36,040 --> 00:48:37,920 What's so terrible about "I hope so"? 708 00:48:38,240 --> 00:48:39,840 - Yeah? Guess what. - What? 709 00:48:39,880 --> 00:48:41,240 She's a lesbian. 710 00:48:47,560 --> 00:48:48,800 Never mind. 711 00:48:49,480 --> 00:48:52,640 She's been with fellas before. Am I right, darling? 712 00:48:55,480 --> 00:48:56,880 You're right. 713 00:48:57,240 --> 00:49:01,000 But sometimes they have their limitations. Am I right? 714 00:49:06,400 --> 00:49:07,800 What are you two talking about? 715 00:49:07,880 --> 00:49:10,520 Never mind. We know what we're talking about. 716 00:49:10,920 --> 00:49:13,400 - Am I right, sweetheart? - You're right. 717 00:49:14,120 --> 00:49:17,280 You know, I wasn't always just Larry's mother. 718 00:49:17,960 --> 00:49:19,400 I used to be... 719 00:49:20,320 --> 00:49:21,960 quite experimental. 720 00:49:22,480 --> 00:49:24,000 - Jesus Christ! - Look at him! 721 00:49:24,080 --> 00:49:26,240 Look who's not up-to-the-minute now. 722 00:49:26,280 --> 00:49:28,080 - Big boy. - That's it. We're going. 723 00:49:28,160 --> 00:49:30,520 Brian, come on. We're going. That's it. Ma, what... 724 00:49:30,560 --> 00:49:34,080 All right. Just remember, you two, life's not just black-and-white. 725 00:49:34,120 --> 00:49:37,280 All right, we'll remember that. Brian, let's go. We're going now. 726 00:49:37,320 --> 00:49:39,840 - Let's go. - Come here, you big lug, give me a kiss. 727 00:49:41,120 --> 00:49:42,400 - I love you. - Yeah. 728 00:49:42,480 --> 00:49:44,880 - I washed my hands. - Congratulations. Let's go. 729 00:49:44,960 --> 00:49:46,880 - Goodbye. - Come here, darling. 730 00:49:49,000 --> 00:49:50,760 I feel like I know you already. 731 00:49:50,840 --> 00:49:52,640 - Very nice meeting you. - It's my pleasure. 732 00:49:52,680 --> 00:49:56,240 All right, we're going. Let's go. Come on. Let's go, Brian. 733 00:49:56,520 --> 00:50:00,440 Just remember, you two, keep an open mind because you never know. 734 00:50:00,520 --> 00:50:01,920 - We will. - Bye! 735 00:50:02,520 --> 00:50:04,520 - I like her, she's very nice. - Man. 736 00:50:15,120 --> 00:50:17,280 {y:i}On the satellite map, {y:i}the cloud over Queensland... 737 00:50:17,360 --> 00:50:19,320 {y:i}and New South Wales is bringing showers... 738 00:50:19,400 --> 00:50:22,240 {y:i}and there's very little activity {y:i}over the rest of the continent. 739 00:50:22,320 --> 00:50:25,000 {y:i}But there is some low-level cloud {y:i}over Southern Victoria... 740 00:50:25,080 --> 00:50:27,920 {y:i}which will bring isolated showers {y:i}mainly to the coastal areas. 741 00:50:28,000 --> 00:50:31,000 {y:i}Another chilly night in Melbourne's suburbs {y:i}with the mercury... 742 00:50:31,560 --> 00:50:34,040 - What are you doing now? {y:i}...and Avalon falling as low... 743 00:50:34,120 --> 00:50:37,760 - Brian, I told you, this is very expensive. - It's not expensive. 744 00:50:38,680 --> 00:50:39,880 Don't argue with me. 745 00:50:41,040 --> 00:50:44,760 Why are you doing this? What do you care about the weather in fucking England for? 746 00:50:44,920 --> 00:50:46,840 - Australia. - Whatever. 747 00:50:47,320 --> 00:50:48,400 It's not England. 748 00:50:48,480 --> 00:50:51,400 Whatever, Brian. Why do you keep calling there? 749 00:50:55,200 --> 00:50:57,080 I really like her voice. 750 00:51:02,240 --> 00:51:05,120 Okay. Try to keep it under control, though. 751 00:51:05,680 --> 00:51:07,480 - All right? - Okay, Larry, I'll try. 752 00:51:07,600 --> 00:51:09,600 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 753 00:51:32,240 --> 00:51:33,960 So I'm not your type? 754 00:51:35,880 --> 00:51:38,560 How did we get back there all of a sudden? 755 00:51:39,400 --> 00:51:40,360 Relax. 756 00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:43,200 You're more woman than I know what to do with. 757 00:51:43,280 --> 00:51:45,880 I don't need to be dipping into the sisterhood. 758 00:51:46,720 --> 00:51:49,760 But I'm just curious because all of a sudden now... 759 00:51:49,800 --> 00:51:51,360 you say you've been with guys. 760 00:51:52,680 --> 00:51:53,840 I have. 761 00:51:55,360 --> 00:51:58,080 But they have their shortcomings? 762 00:51:58,640 --> 00:52:00,960 Besides the fact that they give terrible head. 763 00:52:02,000 --> 00:52:04,400 See, right there, that tells me something. 764 00:52:05,160 --> 00:52:08,600 I know the guys you've been with obviously didn't know... 765 00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:11,800 how to bring home the pearls when they were diving for oysters. 766 00:52:12,840 --> 00:52:14,600 I was actually just joking. 767 00:52:14,720 --> 00:52:18,840 Well, since we're letting it all hang out now, let me tell you something else. 768 00:52:18,920 --> 00:52:23,200 Okay, when it comes to pleasing a woman, your girlfriends, they're just... 769 00:52:23,800 --> 00:52:26,120 they're at a natural disadvantage. 770 00:52:26,280 --> 00:52:29,440 It's like they might try hard, but they're just not backed up... 771 00:52:29,520 --> 00:52:34,240 with millions of years of genetic engineering, programming, instinct. 772 00:52:35,320 --> 00:52:38,840 Nature has evolved man for that purpose. 773 00:52:39,720 --> 00:52:40,920 Satisfy. 774 00:52:41,800 --> 00:52:43,200 Lead the pack. 775 00:52:44,840 --> 00:52:49,520 That's why lesbians are always buying, spending their dough on, you know... 776 00:52:49,600 --> 00:52:54,240 sexual appliances, erotic monkey wrenches and shit, trying to compensate... 777 00:52:55,160 --> 00:52:58,280 for what they don't have. What they're not getting. 778 00:52:59,400 --> 00:53:01,880 The penis. That's right. 779 00:53:03,240 --> 00:53:06,800 Its very design tells you everything you need to know. 780 00:53:08,560 --> 00:53:11,560 Forward motion. With advancements. 781 00:53:11,880 --> 00:53:15,120 Fucking progress into the dark, deep... 782 00:53:15,200 --> 00:53:17,840 mysterious unknown. 783 00:53:19,360 --> 00:53:21,880 It's like adventure-seeking... 784 00:53:22,440 --> 00:53:23,960 frontier-conquering... 785 00:53:25,040 --> 00:53:26,440 obstacle-eradicating. 786 00:53:29,080 --> 00:53:32,440 And you tried to create the impression you didn't read books. 787 00:53:32,960 --> 00:53:35,880 You're settling for second best. That's all I'm saying. 788 00:53:36,160 --> 00:53:38,400 So, in review... 789 00:53:39,360 --> 00:53:40,520 you're saying... 790 00:53:41,080 --> 00:53:44,720 that it's men that are at the top of the must-fuck pyramid? 791 00:53:45,520 --> 00:53:47,520 That's all I'm telling you. 792 00:53:48,440 --> 00:53:50,080 Loving, caring... 793 00:53:50,800 --> 00:53:53,920 - sensitive, giving men. - That's right. 794 00:53:55,600 --> 00:53:57,840 You're entitled to your opinion. 795 00:54:00,880 --> 00:54:04,080 But let us reconsider women for a minute. 796 00:54:04,320 --> 00:54:05,960 - Shall we? - Sure. 797 00:54:06,920 --> 00:54:08,160 Their form: 798 00:54:10,280 --> 00:54:12,200 Neck. Shoulders. 799 00:54:14,400 --> 00:54:15,360 Legs. 800 00:54:16,600 --> 00:54:17,560 Hips. 801 00:54:19,360 --> 00:54:20,960 I think pretty cool. 802 00:54:22,320 --> 00:54:24,440 Now, as far as your famous... 803 00:54:25,400 --> 00:54:26,720 penis goes... 804 00:54:27,520 --> 00:54:29,680 The penis is like some sort of... 805 00:54:30,240 --> 00:54:32,480 bizarre sea slug... 806 00:54:32,520 --> 00:54:35,360 or like a really long toe. 807 00:54:36,160 --> 00:54:40,800 I mean, it's handy, important even. But the pinnacle of sexual design? 808 00:54:41,160 --> 00:54:44,880 The top of the list of erotic destinations? I don't think so. 809 00:54:46,440 --> 00:54:50,320 One's first impulse is to kiss what? 810 00:54:53,440 --> 00:54:55,040 To kiss the lips. 811 00:54:56,240 --> 00:54:57,240 Firm... 812 00:54:57,480 --> 00:55:00,640 delicious lips. Sweet lips. 813 00:55:02,400 --> 00:55:05,120 Surrounding a warm, moist... 814 00:55:06,880 --> 00:55:08,760 dizzyingly scented mouth. 815 00:55:10,040 --> 00:55:12,440 That's what everyone wants to kiss. 816 00:55:13,000 --> 00:55:15,800 Not a toe. Not a sea slug. 817 00:55:17,040 --> 00:55:18,240 A mouth. 818 00:55:20,120 --> 00:55:21,920 And why do you think that is, stupid? 819 00:55:25,400 --> 00:55:28,320 Because the mouth is the twin sister... 820 00:55:28,400 --> 00:55:31,240 the almost exact look-alike of the what? 821 00:55:34,160 --> 00:55:35,520 Not the toe. 822 00:55:36,840 --> 00:55:39,400 The mouth is the twin sister... 823 00:55:39,880 --> 00:55:42,720 of the vagina. 824 00:55:47,400 --> 00:55:51,440 And all creatures big and small seek the orifice. 825 00:55:51,560 --> 00:55:55,160 The opening. To be taken in, engulfed. 826 00:55:56,160 --> 00:55:59,480 To be squeezed and lovingly crushed by what is truly... 827 00:56:00,520 --> 00:56:02,880 the all-powerful, all-encompassing. 828 00:56:03,600 --> 00:56:06,160 Now, if it's design you're concerned with... 829 00:56:06,240 --> 00:56:08,720 hidden meanings, symbolism and power... 830 00:56:10,280 --> 00:56:11,720 forget the top of Mount Everest. 831 00:56:11,800 --> 00:56:15,040 Forget the bottom of the sea, the moon, the stars. 832 00:56:15,080 --> 00:56:17,760 There is no place, nowhere, that has been the object... 833 00:56:17,800 --> 00:56:22,400 of more ambitions, more battles than the sweet, sacred mystery... 834 00:56:23,240 --> 00:56:26,400 between a woman's legs that I am proud to call... 835 00:56:28,040 --> 00:56:29,200 my pussy. 836 00:56:32,360 --> 00:56:34,840 So I guess this is just my roundabout way of saying... 837 00:56:34,920 --> 00:56:38,520 that it is women who are, in fact, the most desirable form. 838 00:56:40,280 --> 00:56:41,920 Wouldn't you agree? 839 00:56:44,320 --> 00:56:45,400 I agree. 840 00:56:47,360 --> 00:56:48,720 And so do I. 841 00:57:01,920 --> 00:57:02,960 {y:i}Hello? 842 00:57:10,880 --> 00:57:13,240 {y:i}- Is somebody there? - Yes. 843 00:57:14,680 --> 00:57:15,640 Who's this? 844 00:57:20,360 --> 00:57:21,600 I don't find this funny. 845 00:57:24,480 --> 00:57:25,600 Is this the retard? 846 00:57:27,400 --> 00:57:30,840 Brian, what are you doing now? Give me the fucking phone. 847 00:57:33,800 --> 00:57:34,760 Hello? 848 00:57:35,120 --> 00:57:36,240 Who the fuck is this? 849 00:57:37,760 --> 00:57:39,360 What the fuck is going on over there? 850 00:57:40,640 --> 00:57:42,240 Nothing. Sorry, Louis. 851 00:57:42,760 --> 00:57:44,400 {y:i}We're not getting the desired movement. 852 00:57:44,480 --> 00:57:45,960 {y:i}We're stepping up the operation. 853 00:57:46,240 --> 00:57:50,400 First thing in the morning, send his thumb to James Dorf... Are you listening? 854 00:57:51,000 --> 00:57:52,720 - Yeah. {y:i}- Good. 855 00:57:52,800 --> 00:57:56,080 {y:i}To James Dorf {y:i}at the U.S. Courthouse on Spring Street. 856 00:57:58,120 --> 00:58:00,800 Hold on one second. Go in the other room. 857 00:58:01,360 --> 00:58:04,160 Go in the other room in the back. Go in the back. 858 00:58:04,240 --> 00:58:06,920 I'm talking on the phone. Go in the back. 859 00:58:08,320 --> 00:58:10,720 What do you mean? How do I send his thumb? 860 00:58:10,880 --> 00:58:13,480 You cut it the fuck off. You take it to Boxes 'R' Us... 861 00:58:13,560 --> 00:58:16,400 {y:i}or whatever it is. {y:i}You put the appropriate postage on it... 862 00:58:16,520 --> 00:58:19,840 and that's how you send it. Send it express next-day delivery. 863 00:58:19,880 --> 00:58:24,040 Make sure you kindly refrain from providing a return address, you fucking dummy. 864 00:58:24,280 --> 00:58:25,320 I mean... 865 00:58:26,400 --> 00:58:28,160 You want me to cut his thumb off? 866 00:58:28,200 --> 00:58:30,640 It's enough already. Put the clam-licker on. 867 00:58:31,240 --> 00:58:34,760 Hold on. Wait a minute. What about, like, the bleeding and the... 868 00:58:34,880 --> 00:58:37,240 I can't believe I'm talking to a professional. 869 00:58:37,280 --> 00:58:40,000 I'll send people to help you, they'll take your thumb, too. 870 00:58:40,200 --> 00:58:43,040 - I'm not saying that. {y:i}- I don't like the habit of hiring you... 871 00:58:43,240 --> 00:58:46,320 and then having to hire someone to make sure you do your job right. 872 00:58:46,400 --> 00:58:48,040 {y:i}Do your fucking job right, you hear me? 873 00:58:48,120 --> 00:58:49,600 I'm getting tired of this. 874 00:58:57,920 --> 00:58:59,720 - Larry. - What? 875 00:59:00,920 --> 00:59:02,360 Can I stay here with you? 876 00:59:04,200 --> 00:59:05,160 No. 877 00:59:07,520 --> 00:59:10,480 - Time for you to go to bed anyways. - I don't want to go to bed. 878 00:59:10,560 --> 00:59:14,920 - Lf I tell you to go to bed, go to bed. - I don't want to go to bed, though. 879 00:59:16,920 --> 00:59:19,120 "New. Our best Charmin ever. 880 00:59:19,240 --> 00:59:20,760 "Charmin Ultra Double Roll. 881 00:59:20,840 --> 00:59:23,200 "Twice as many sheets as regular Charmin Ultra. 882 00:59:23,760 --> 00:59:26,680 "Unscented bathroom tissue. 170 square feet. 883 00:59:27,100 --> 00:59:29,420 "4.5 inches by 4.0 inches." 1 00:59:30,500 --> 00:59:33,340 And they got it in centimeters or whatever. 2 00:59:37,180 --> 00:59:39,740 It's the same shit on the back. All right? 3 00:59:40,980 --> 00:59:43,500 - Good night. - Good night, Larry. 4 00:59:47,140 --> 00:59:49,140 - Yeah. - Thank you very much. 5 01:00:12,500 --> 01:00:14,460 What are your friends like? 6 01:00:16,060 --> 01:00:19,460 - I don't really have friends. - Who do you hang out with? 7 01:00:21,500 --> 01:00:22,580 Nobody. 8 01:00:26,020 --> 01:00:28,380 Why do I think you're not exaggerating? 9 01:00:31,380 --> 01:00:32,660 I just keep to myself. 10 01:00:32,740 --> 01:00:35,540 I go about my business, you know. Do my work. 11 01:00:36,940 --> 01:00:40,740 A charming, loveable guy like yourself? You should get out more. 12 01:00:40,900 --> 01:00:44,340 I'm sure there's a ton of straight women who you could make very happy. 13 01:00:47,860 --> 01:00:50,180 Louis wants us to cut the kid's thumb off. 14 01:01:39,060 --> 01:01:41,300 I'd like to give shouts to all my homies. 15 01:01:41,780 --> 01:01:44,100 Mrs. Friedman. Lily. 16 01:01:44,180 --> 01:01:47,020 Mr. Mossman and the man he plays cards with. 17 01:01:47,300 --> 01:01:48,820 Forgot his name. 18 01:01:49,660 --> 01:01:51,860 And all my peeps at Wilshire Adult Care. 19 01:01:52,460 --> 01:01:55,340 Everybody in the cafeteria. Big ups! 20 01:01:56,340 --> 01:01:59,580 What's up to my man Larry. And Ricki. 21 01:01:59,860 --> 01:02:01,580 Yo, yo, yo. Peace, G. 22 01:02:02,940 --> 01:02:04,500 And the rec room. 23 01:02:09,140 --> 01:02:11,020 I got neighbors, you know. 24 01:02:12,780 --> 01:02:14,220 {y:i}D�game sabrosa. 25 01:02:16,220 --> 01:02:18,420 - What's that? - It's "espa�ol". 26 01:02:19,460 --> 01:02:20,580 What does it mean? 27 01:02:21,780 --> 01:02:23,060 I don't know. 28 01:02:26,900 --> 01:02:28,140 See that? 29 01:02:29,220 --> 01:02:32,140 Don't be a playa hater, G. 30 01:02:37,900 --> 01:02:40,460 - Yeah? - Who the fuck are you? 31 01:02:41,140 --> 01:02:42,740 Who the fuck are you? 32 01:02:46,100 --> 01:02:47,140 Excuse me. 33 01:02:48,820 --> 01:02:50,100 What a shithole! 34 01:02:50,140 --> 01:02:53,580 - Lady, I think you're in the wrong place. - You are in the wrong place. 35 01:02:53,700 --> 01:02:57,020 All right? You're in the wrong place. You have no idea. 36 01:02:58,700 --> 01:03:00,060 And who the fuck are you? 37 01:03:00,260 --> 01:03:02,580 - You're the fuck are you. - What? 38 01:03:05,420 --> 01:03:07,060 What are you doing here? 39 01:03:08,220 --> 01:03:10,220 - I'm stalking you. - Wait, you know her? 40 01:03:10,260 --> 01:03:12,860 First of all, do not say my name in this room. All right? 41 01:03:12,940 --> 01:03:14,660 Second of all, you're out of line. 42 01:03:14,740 --> 01:03:17,900 This is a professional situation and you have no right to intrude. 43 01:03:17,940 --> 01:03:21,300 What kind of professional situation? I can't believe this. 44 01:03:21,820 --> 01:03:23,260 A fucking man? 45 01:03:23,540 --> 01:03:26,140 Okay. I really thought this was all about Sharon. 46 01:03:26,220 --> 01:03:28,980 - Are you telling people where we are? - Mind your own business. 47 01:03:29,020 --> 01:03:30,660 - Shut the fuck up. - Blow me. 48 01:03:30,740 --> 01:03:32,180 Listen, both of you shut up. 49 01:03:32,500 --> 01:03:35,940 Look, I haven't told anybody where we are. And, Robin... 50 01:03:36,820 --> 01:03:38,940 this is a professional situation. 51 01:03:39,020 --> 01:03:42,380 Our problems have nothing to do with Sharon... 52 01:03:42,500 --> 01:03:44,340 and they have nothing to do with him. 53 01:03:44,500 --> 01:03:46,860 - I want you to leave right now! Please. - No! 54 01:03:47,420 --> 01:03:48,940 I'm not leaving, he's leaving. 55 01:03:49,380 --> 01:03:51,420 What? Who the fuck do you think you are? 56 01:03:51,500 --> 01:03:54,260 - I fucking live here. I'm not going anywhere. - Yeah? 57 01:03:54,620 --> 01:03:56,980 Neither am I. Going to be all there is to that. 58 01:03:57,060 --> 01:03:59,220 - Why are you doing this? - What if I throw you out? 59 01:03:59,300 --> 01:04:02,540 What if I roundhouse you upside your fat head and collapse your skull. 60 01:04:02,580 --> 01:04:06,260 - I don't know. Give it a shot. - Don't. She knows how to do that stuff. 61 01:04:06,340 --> 01:04:08,180 - Don't be macho. - I don't give a fuck. 62 01:04:08,220 --> 01:04:11,180 This isn't lesbian talk-circle time. We got something to do. 63 01:04:11,220 --> 01:04:14,740 - You're getting the fuck out. Got it? - I mean, this? You need this? 64 01:04:14,820 --> 01:04:18,700 You need a little freedom or something? You want to dabble? We can all fuck. 65 01:04:18,740 --> 01:04:20,980 We can all have sex together, that's fine. 66 01:04:21,620 --> 01:04:22,740 What do you say, Hot Rocks? 67 01:04:22,820 --> 01:04:24,700 - Would you like it? - You're out of your mind. 68 01:04:24,780 --> 01:04:27,860 - You know you want it. - Our situation has nothing to do with him. 69 01:04:28,780 --> 01:04:30,060 It's over. 70 01:04:31,380 --> 01:04:34,860 - It's not him. It's us, honey. - Right, it's not you, it's her. Get the... 71 01:04:34,940 --> 01:04:37,460 Just shut up for one second! God! Fuck! 72 01:04:37,620 --> 01:04:39,580 This has nothing to do with him. 73 01:04:43,620 --> 01:04:46,140 - It's just, we're over. - No, we're not over. 74 01:04:46,220 --> 01:04:49,860 We'll set up together, the three of us, till you get this out of your system. 75 01:04:49,980 --> 01:04:53,700 - Baby, you're not hearing me. - I'm fucking hearing you. Okay? 76 01:04:55,860 --> 01:04:56,940 God damn it! 77 01:04:57,580 --> 01:05:01,020 See, I'm going to kill myself right now and you care... 78 01:05:01,780 --> 01:05:04,620 - That's a nice girl. - Shut the fuck up, all right! 79 01:05:07,140 --> 01:05:09,100 - What the fuck is that? - What did you... 80 01:05:09,180 --> 01:05:10,340 No. 81 01:05:12,340 --> 01:05:14,340 - What did you do? - Is this hot enough for you? 82 01:05:14,420 --> 01:05:15,740 - Get away. - You want some? 83 01:05:15,820 --> 01:05:17,140 Get away. What's wrong with you? 84 01:05:17,220 --> 01:05:18,780 - Oh, my God. - What the fuck is this? 85 01:05:18,860 --> 01:05:20,500 Lady, you need some Band-Aids. 86 01:05:25,300 --> 01:05:27,740 This must be Mental-fucking-lllness Week. 87 01:05:39,220 --> 01:05:42,740 That woman is fucking beautiful. 88 01:05:44,460 --> 01:05:45,460 Yes. 89 01:05:46,260 --> 01:05:48,340 She's like the ones at the Baywatch. 90 01:05:51,100 --> 01:05:53,020 They make my penis sneeze. 91 01:05:57,980 --> 01:06:00,260 You got a good sense of humor, you know that? 92 01:06:00,820 --> 01:06:01,900 God bless you. 93 01:06:04,820 --> 01:06:06,900 - Thank you. - No, not you, stupid. 94 01:06:06,980 --> 01:06:09,020 When my penis sneezes, I say, "God bless you. 95 01:06:09,100 --> 01:06:10,860 "God bless you, penis." 96 01:06:29,140 --> 01:06:30,420 She's going to be okay. 97 01:06:31,580 --> 01:06:32,660 What a relief. 98 01:06:35,500 --> 01:06:38,780 Brian, would you excuse us? I want to talk to Larry for a minute. Okay? 99 01:06:38,860 --> 01:06:40,780 - You'll be all right in the car? - Yeah. 100 01:06:40,820 --> 01:06:42,140 Okay, good. 101 01:06:53,860 --> 01:06:54,900 I just... 102 01:06:55,820 --> 01:06:58,220 I got to tell you, I'm not up for this thumb deal. 103 01:06:58,300 --> 01:07:00,020 I say we don't do it. 104 01:07:06,100 --> 01:07:07,700 You trying to test me? 105 01:07:07,860 --> 01:07:10,860 Is that it? You wanna see if I'm gonna do what I'm supposed to do? 106 01:07:10,940 --> 01:07:11,900 No. 107 01:07:13,420 --> 01:07:16,460 So, what are you, a contractor with a conscience? 108 01:07:18,140 --> 01:07:20,500 Look, I've done some bad things... 109 01:07:20,660 --> 01:07:23,900 but I didn't sign on to this to be a brutal street thug. 110 01:07:24,060 --> 01:07:27,620 Because, as far as I'm concerned, that's not the job I took. 111 01:07:31,780 --> 01:07:33,300 How would you get around it? 112 01:07:34,500 --> 01:07:35,820 I'd work it out. 113 01:07:36,500 --> 01:07:39,340 But first I got to know, are you with me? 114 01:07:49,940 --> 01:07:50,860 Sure. 115 01:07:51,660 --> 01:07:53,060 Sure or yes? 116 01:07:53,140 --> 01:07:55,740 - That's the same thing. - No, it's not the same thing. 117 01:07:56,060 --> 01:07:59,740 See, if I were to ask you to move my couch for me you'd probably say, "Sure." 118 01:08:00,500 --> 01:08:02,980 But if I were to ask you to look deep into my eyes... 119 01:08:03,100 --> 01:08:05,220 and tell me from the bottom of your heart... 120 01:08:05,300 --> 01:08:08,940 if it would give you great pleasure if I were to suck your cock for 12 hours... 121 01:08:09,340 --> 01:08:12,140 if I may be presumptuous, you'd probably say, "Yes." 122 01:08:13,420 --> 01:08:16,020 See, it just implies a different level of commitment. 123 01:08:19,060 --> 01:08:20,580 Ask me the question again. 124 01:08:21,740 --> 01:08:23,540 Okay. Are you with me? 125 01:08:25,580 --> 01:08:26,700 Yes. 126 01:08:29,940 --> 01:08:31,820 Yeah? Good. 127 01:08:35,780 --> 01:08:36,020 Isn't this B level? 128 01:08:36,020 --> 01:08:36,980 Isn't this B level? 129 01:08:37,060 --> 01:08:38,780 This is D level. You shouldn't be here. 130 01:08:38,860 --> 01:08:40,140 I'm looking for B level. 131 01:08:40,180 --> 01:08:43,700 This is a D level and no one is allowed here. You need to go back to B level. 132 01:08:44,380 --> 01:08:46,500 Hold on. Because you're confusing me, okay? 133 01:08:46,580 --> 01:08:47,660 You're confusing me. 134 01:08:47,700 --> 01:08:50,220 Let's just start from the beginning. If this isn't B... 135 01:08:50,500 --> 01:08:51,860 Oh, my God. 136 01:08:53,140 --> 01:08:55,540 - I am so sorry. - That's okay. 137 01:08:59,620 --> 01:09:02,540 Just soak that in cold water and it'll come right out, okay? 138 01:09:02,580 --> 01:09:04,980 I promise you. Yes. No, it will. 139 01:09:06,380 --> 01:09:10,220 The thing is, the reason I'm here is they told me to go around the corner... 140 01:09:10,260 --> 01:09:11,820 - Close your eyes. - What? 141 01:09:11,900 --> 01:09:14,860 Close your eyes. Follow me. Just walk in. Don't look. 142 01:09:15,780 --> 01:09:17,620 Come on. Go. You're fine. 143 01:09:24,140 --> 01:09:26,140 - Can I open them? - No. Stand right here. 144 01:09:26,220 --> 01:09:29,100 - It's cold in here. - Don't look at nothing. All right? 145 01:09:38,620 --> 01:09:40,340 - Can I open them? - No. 146 01:09:41,180 --> 01:09:42,580 Stay turned around. 147 01:09:43,180 --> 01:09:45,260 Smells like my grandmother's. 148 01:09:49,620 --> 01:09:51,660 - What was that? - It's nothing. 149 01:10:19,140 --> 01:10:22,500 {y:i}I like big butts and I cannot lie 150 01:10:22,740 --> 01:10:24,540 {y:i}The other brothers can't deny 151 01:10:24,820 --> 01:10:26,900 {y:i}When the girls walk in {y:i}with an itty-bitty waist 152 01:10:26,980 --> 01:10:31,220 {y:i}And round things in your face {y:i}You get sprung, wanna pull up tough 153 01:10:31,260 --> 01:10:32,820 {y:i}'Cause you notice that butt was stuffed 154 01:10:32,900 --> 01:10:35,540 {y:i}'Cause I'm long, and I'm strong 155 01:10:35,580 --> 01:10:37,180 {y:i}And I'm down to get the friction on 156 01:10:37,260 --> 01:10:38,940 {y:i}So, ladies, yeah 157 01:10:39,020 --> 01:10:40,140 {y:i}Ladies, yeah 158 01:10:40,180 --> 01:10:42,620 {y:i}If you wanna roll in my Mercedes {y:i}Yeah 159 01:10:42,860 --> 01:10:46,860 {y:i}So turn around! Stick it out! {y:i}Even white boys got to shout 160 01:10:46,900 --> 01:10:48,100 {y:i}Baby got back! 161 01:10:49,780 --> 01:10:51,140 {y:i}Baby got back! 162 01:10:53,940 --> 01:10:56,020 That's an old-school song. 163 01:10:57,300 --> 01:11:00,020 You're old-school, too, Larry. 164 01:11:03,500 --> 01:11:07,020 We got an item that we want to package ourselves and, you know... 165 01:11:07,060 --> 01:11:08,100 - Mail out. - Okay. 166 01:11:08,180 --> 01:11:10,300 Could we just get an envelope from you? 167 01:11:10,660 --> 01:11:12,060 What size would you like? 168 01:11:12,140 --> 01:11:14,220 - Just the top, right... - 6 by 9. 169 01:11:18,220 --> 01:11:19,420 So all right. 170 01:11:20,740 --> 01:11:22,100 We're done, right? 171 01:11:23,620 --> 01:11:24,660 That's it. 172 01:11:39,260 --> 01:11:40,340 Thanks. 173 01:11:56,460 --> 01:11:58,540 Would you like your parcel insured? 174 01:12:01,300 --> 01:12:03,020 No, that's all right. 175 01:12:20,700 --> 01:12:22,380 I'll be right back. 176 01:12:24,940 --> 01:12:26,460 Friend of yours? 177 01:12:27,380 --> 01:12:28,660 Close, personal. 178 01:12:37,260 --> 01:12:40,420 You know something? You're right. It is sadness. 179 01:12:41,180 --> 01:12:44,580 I'm fucking sad. You got me. You're a genius. 180 01:12:45,500 --> 01:12:49,220 You know why I'm fucking sad? Because I got this fucking... 181 01:12:50,420 --> 01:12:53,420 beautiful, sexy, gorgeous... 182 01:12:53,660 --> 01:12:57,860 heartthrob-o-rama, fucking smart, amazing bombshell... 183 01:12:58,020 --> 01:13:00,820 17-on-a-fucking-10-scale girl... 184 01:13:00,900 --> 01:13:02,980 sleeping in a bed, right next to me. 185 01:13:04,660 --> 01:13:05,980 And you know what? 186 01:13:07,020 --> 01:13:09,420 She's a stone-cold dyke. 187 01:13:10,020 --> 01:13:12,180 A fucking untouchable... 188 01:13:12,260 --> 01:13:15,180 unhaveable, unattainable brick wall... 189 01:13:15,220 --> 01:13:17,220 fucking Dykeasaurus Rexi. 190 01:13:18,700 --> 01:13:21,940 So it's sad, okay? What do you want me to do? 191 01:13:22,700 --> 01:13:24,700 I feel fucking sadness about that. 192 01:13:25,580 --> 01:13:27,540 There's nothing I can fucking do. 193 01:13:33,140 --> 01:13:35,540 And not only is she a major babe... 194 01:13:36,980 --> 01:13:39,220 but I really like this girl a lot. 195 01:13:40,020 --> 01:13:41,220 A lot. 196 01:13:42,140 --> 01:13:44,620 She's not like anybody else I ever knew before... 197 01:13:44,700 --> 01:13:47,220 and that's a completely fucking new one on me. 198 01:13:48,860 --> 01:13:52,180 I don't even know her real fucking name. So there you go. 199 01:13:52,260 --> 01:13:55,140 And in case you're interested, my life sucks. 200 01:13:56,500 --> 01:13:59,300 All right? Stick a fork in me, I'm done. 201 01:14:15,780 --> 01:14:19,180 {y:i}Clean the bar all you like. {y:i}I'm just going to puke on it again. 202 01:14:19,820 --> 01:14:21,620 {y:i}- Oh, you got me. {y:i}- Oh! I got you! 203 01:14:31,580 --> 01:14:33,540 Do you think your fingernails need trimming? 204 01:14:41,940 --> 01:14:43,380 They're fine. 205 01:14:46,940 --> 01:14:49,220 What? You don't like my fingernails now? 206 01:14:51,460 --> 01:14:55,500 Look, I have no idea if this is true or not, but I've heard it said... 207 01:14:55,940 --> 01:15:00,140 that those who are balanced more toward the masculine of either sex... 208 01:15:00,180 --> 01:15:02,220 check their fingernails this way. 209 01:15:02,900 --> 01:15:07,220 And those balanced more toward the feminine check them that way. 210 01:15:08,380 --> 01:15:11,820 I had a feeling that even though you have this tough guy thing going on... 211 01:15:11,900 --> 01:15:15,260 that you are wrestling with some very strong feminine leanings. 212 01:15:15,860 --> 01:15:17,460 That's fucking bullshit. 213 01:15:17,940 --> 01:15:21,100 I can't see. I'm farsighted. Nearsighted, whatever it is. 214 01:15:21,380 --> 01:15:24,780 So I hold them out here but I can't see them up close. 215 01:15:25,740 --> 01:15:28,980 To find out how somebody's balanced toward a masculine, look at me. 216 01:15:29,220 --> 01:15:31,700 I can't see. That's why I hold them far away. 217 01:15:32,020 --> 01:15:34,180 - All right. - Yeah, it is all right. 218 01:15:34,260 --> 01:15:35,340 No, all right. 219 01:15:35,460 --> 01:15:37,300 I was gonna do this. That's what I wanna do. 220 01:15:37,340 --> 01:15:40,220 But I know I can't see so I hold them out there to look at them. 221 01:15:40,300 --> 01:15:41,260 All right. 222 01:15:52,540 --> 01:15:55,220 Don't give me that look. I see you looking at me. 223 01:15:58,340 --> 01:16:00,380 - Are you gay? - What the fuck. 224 01:16:00,820 --> 01:16:02,660 No. I'm not gay! 225 01:16:03,260 --> 01:16:05,900 Why do you look at me and think I'm gay? 226 01:16:05,940 --> 01:16:07,380 I'm not fucking gay! 227 01:16:07,420 --> 01:16:10,140 - Are you sure? - Yeah, I'm fucking sure. 228 01:16:12,260 --> 01:16:14,580 You know what, I bet you're right. 229 01:16:15,020 --> 01:16:17,260 - Thank you. - It wasn't a compliment. 230 01:16:17,340 --> 01:16:21,260 Ricki, whatever your real name is, all right, this is my eyes. 231 01:16:23,260 --> 01:16:26,860 Look how I'm acting. You're driving me crazy. 232 01:16:27,620 --> 01:16:30,540 You give me a fucking headache. 233 01:16:31,580 --> 01:16:36,180 I don't even know why I had a crush on you, back a long time ago when I first met you... 234 01:16:36,780 --> 01:16:38,620 that you really cured me of. 235 01:16:40,580 --> 01:16:41,980 I don't know. 236 01:16:42,260 --> 01:16:44,980 Maybe it's because you know I can kick your ass. 237 01:16:45,500 --> 01:16:47,380 Maybe that turns you on. 238 01:16:48,660 --> 01:16:50,460 You cannot kick my ass. 239 01:17:10,420 --> 01:17:11,460 What? 240 01:17:15,700 --> 01:17:17,260 You need a woman. 241 01:17:18,780 --> 01:17:20,060 I got one. 242 01:17:21,140 --> 01:17:22,180 Stop. 243 01:17:24,060 --> 01:17:25,500 Kiss me again. 244 01:17:28,740 --> 01:17:30,540 I thought you wanted to be my bitch. 245 01:17:32,340 --> 01:17:34,100 This is so fucked up. 246 01:17:56,060 --> 01:17:58,900 - Where you going? - It's turkey time. 247 01:18:04,260 --> 01:18:05,740 Gobble, gobble. 248 01:18:07,220 --> 01:18:08,260 What? 249 01:18:09,780 --> 01:18:11,300 Now, you talk the talk... 250 01:18:11,380 --> 01:18:13,900 you know I'm expecting you to walk the walk. Come on. 251 01:18:13,940 --> 01:18:16,780 Show me what I've been missing my whole life. 252 01:18:16,820 --> 01:18:18,940 Lay some of that sweet "heterolingus" on me. 253 01:18:24,940 --> 01:18:26,220 I think... 254 01:18:27,060 --> 01:18:28,620 to be serious... 255 01:18:30,020 --> 01:18:32,260 I just... You know, I think... 256 01:18:32,820 --> 01:18:35,540 I was thinking, you know, and you were right... 257 01:18:35,620 --> 01:18:38,380 when you said probably, actually a woman might know more... 258 01:18:38,420 --> 01:18:42,220 about what feels better to another woman. She's a woman herself. 259 01:18:42,460 --> 01:18:46,100 A guy might be at a certain disadvantage. You know, like... 260 01:18:47,380 --> 01:18:51,100 It's like, you need a handicap. You know, like golf. 261 01:18:53,980 --> 01:18:55,900 Shut up and get over here. 262 01:20:41,300 --> 01:20:43,020 God bless you, penis. 263 01:20:44,860 --> 01:20:46,340 What'd you say? 264 01:20:48,620 --> 01:20:49,820 Nothing. 265 01:20:53,100 --> 01:20:55,780 Every relationship has a bull and a cow? 266 01:20:57,140 --> 01:20:58,580 That's right. 267 01:21:16,340 --> 01:21:18,820 Just to be up front about all this... 268 01:21:20,060 --> 01:21:21,940 when this gig is over... 269 01:21:23,380 --> 01:21:26,340 I want you to know that I'm going to be leaving. 270 01:21:46,620 --> 01:21:47,620 {y:i}Listen... 271 01:21:47,700 --> 01:21:50,580 you and Trixie over there, meet me at Beverly and Lomitas. 272 01:21:51,100 --> 01:21:52,500 Louis, what's going on? 273 01:21:52,820 --> 01:21:54,620 And don't bring the thing. 274 01:21:55,140 --> 01:21:57,580 - The what? {y:i}- The thing. Don't bring it. 275 01:21:57,660 --> 01:21:58,700 What thing? 276 01:21:59,020 --> 01:22:01,540 The thing. Don't bring... Don't bring it. 277 01:22:02,580 --> 01:22:04,780 - You mean the... {y:i}- Yeah. Don't bring it. 278 01:22:04,820 --> 01:22:07,220 {y:i}You leave it somewhere safe {y:i}for the time being. 279 01:22:07,380 --> 01:22:08,940 - All right. - You understand? 280 01:22:09,020 --> 01:22:11,460 {y:i}- Yeah, I understand. - And hurry up, jackass. 281 01:22:13,300 --> 01:22:14,340 What? 282 01:22:15,300 --> 01:22:17,300 It's Louis. Fucking pissed. 283 01:22:18,380 --> 01:22:20,620 See this? Some cookies in there. 284 01:22:21,660 --> 01:22:22,860 Be back. 285 01:22:23,420 --> 01:22:25,380 - When are you coming back? - Soon. 286 01:22:25,540 --> 01:22:29,140 - Just relax, eat your breakfast. Okay? - I'm not hungry, though. 287 01:22:29,260 --> 01:22:32,820 Well, you can't skip breakfast. It's a very important meal. All right? 288 01:22:32,900 --> 01:22:35,420 Don't go nowhere. Don't touch nothing. 289 01:22:35,780 --> 01:22:38,740 - Don't make phone calls. I'm not kidding. - All right, Larry. 290 01:22:38,820 --> 01:22:40,460 All right. See you later. 291 01:22:40,620 --> 01:22:42,500 - Bye, Ricki. - Bye, Brian. 292 01:22:53,660 --> 01:22:55,780 - What? - Nothing. 293 01:23:03,780 --> 01:23:06,500 You know, I got this fantasy. 294 01:23:07,540 --> 01:23:08,980 About making it with a guy? 295 01:23:12,500 --> 01:23:13,500 No. 296 01:23:14,740 --> 01:23:16,140 That's not it. 297 01:23:18,460 --> 01:23:22,020 Going somewhere, you know, like, somewhere really... 298 01:23:25,980 --> 01:23:27,100 clean. 299 01:23:29,180 --> 01:23:31,060 - Clean? - Yeah. 300 01:23:32,380 --> 01:23:36,300 No scumbags telling you what to do. Nobody yelling at you all the time. 301 01:23:37,260 --> 01:23:39,300 Someplace you could just be. 302 01:23:42,980 --> 01:23:44,340 Be yourself. 303 01:23:47,660 --> 01:23:49,060 No bad stuff. 304 01:23:53,780 --> 01:23:55,340 That sounds good. 305 01:24:09,820 --> 01:24:13,140 - What's up? - We have a visitor from New York. 306 01:24:15,060 --> 01:24:16,340 Follow me. 307 01:24:26,620 --> 01:24:27,780 Hello. 308 01:24:29,500 --> 01:24:32,700 - Welcome. Nice to meet you. - Hello, sir. 309 01:24:32,820 --> 01:24:34,580 Finally. Nice to meet you, too. 310 01:24:34,860 --> 01:24:36,940 Come. Look at you. Beautiful. 311 01:24:37,020 --> 01:24:39,700 Come on in. Here. Grab a couch. 312 01:24:40,060 --> 01:24:41,300 Sit, sit. 313 01:24:41,700 --> 01:24:44,300 I say everything twice. In, in. Sit, sit. 314 01:24:45,060 --> 01:24:47,380 I'm so glad you could come... 315 01:24:47,940 --> 01:24:51,660 on such a short notice, too. Thank you, I really appreciate it. 316 01:24:51,700 --> 01:24:55,820 I really... I thank you. I appreciate it. Here, I've got some stuff. 317 01:24:56,140 --> 01:25:00,420 I'm sorry if I'm a bit of a mess, but I just got in a few hours ago. 318 01:25:01,220 --> 01:25:04,940 I'm sure Louis told you, you know, I'm having... 319 01:25:05,300 --> 01:25:08,300 some little legal problems out here right now. 320 01:25:09,460 --> 01:25:13,740 What are you gonna do? It's a nuisance, but what are you going to do? 321 01:25:14,020 --> 01:25:15,940 I got to fight it, right? 322 01:25:16,980 --> 01:25:20,340 I mean, I can't go to jail. That just can't happen. 323 01:25:21,300 --> 01:25:23,100 I'm used to the finer things. 324 01:25:23,340 --> 01:25:25,620 - Louis, am I right? - You are right. 325 01:25:27,060 --> 01:25:30,060 It can't be. So I think we can say... 326 01:25:31,020 --> 01:25:34,260 beyond a shadow of a doubt, that it's not gonna happen. 327 01:25:39,820 --> 01:25:42,140 Somewhere a mistake has been made. 328 01:25:45,220 --> 01:25:46,660 Did you know... 329 01:25:48,140 --> 01:25:50,140 that apparently some people... 330 01:25:50,220 --> 01:25:53,740 do not regard the thumb, technically, to be a finger? 331 01:25:57,460 --> 01:26:00,220 Curious for myself, I turned to Louis here... 332 01:26:00,500 --> 01:26:04,580 who with his newfound dictionary skills looked it up for me. 333 01:26:05,140 --> 01:26:07,340 - You know what it said? - No. 334 01:26:08,460 --> 01:26:10,020 Tell him what it said, Louis. 335 01:26:11,220 --> 01:26:12,420 It said, quote: 336 01:26:12,500 --> 01:26:16,900 "The short, thick, inner digit of the hand next to the forefinger." Unquote. 337 01:26:17,140 --> 01:26:19,660 Now it said, "digit," not "finger." 338 01:26:19,900 --> 01:26:24,380 So I still don't really know, technically, if it's considered a finger or not. 339 01:26:24,860 --> 01:26:26,340 - Right? - Right. 340 01:26:27,620 --> 01:26:29,380 Right. Look at him. I love him. 341 01:26:29,860 --> 01:26:33,540 I love this guy. He eats no matter what. I love you, Louis. 342 01:26:33,940 --> 01:26:35,300 What's this? 343 01:26:35,860 --> 01:26:37,900 What is this? Louis. 344 01:26:39,060 --> 01:26:41,020 I've been subpoenaed. 345 01:26:42,940 --> 01:26:46,020 I can't be consorting with armed felons. 346 01:26:48,300 --> 01:26:50,500 A little consideration, please. 347 01:26:51,420 --> 01:26:54,740 Besides, you think something like this is necessary... 348 01:26:54,820 --> 01:26:56,860 anyway, to intimidate people? 349 01:26:59,980 --> 01:27:02,420 I say intimidation comes from within. 350 01:27:02,500 --> 01:27:05,740 There are a multitude of qualities an individual can possess... 351 01:27:05,780 --> 01:27:07,780 that make them intimidating. 352 01:27:07,860 --> 01:27:11,420 Not only this, this is the outside. Then there's the inside. 353 01:27:12,220 --> 01:27:15,300 But you know what's the most intimidating quality? 354 01:27:15,540 --> 01:27:17,220 Not that you asked. 355 01:27:17,420 --> 01:27:20,540 But the absolutely most intimidating in my opinion? 356 01:27:20,900 --> 01:27:23,700 When an individual just doesn't give a shit. 357 01:27:24,540 --> 01:27:28,020 - Louis, you want to go to medical school? - Medical school? 358 01:27:30,580 --> 01:27:31,620 Yes! 359 01:27:34,660 --> 01:27:38,540 Students there can always use something to learn on. 360 01:27:43,940 --> 01:27:45,820 I feel like I'm floating. 361 01:27:48,020 --> 01:27:49,020 I feel... 362 01:27:50,580 --> 01:27:51,820 released. 363 01:27:55,620 --> 01:27:57,300 I don't give a shit. 364 01:27:58,660 --> 01:27:59,820 I don't. 365 01:28:09,740 --> 01:28:12,380 I have no compunctions... 366 01:28:13,620 --> 01:28:15,940 none whatsoever. 367 01:28:19,860 --> 01:28:21,820 And I am very concerned... 368 01:28:23,340 --> 01:28:26,580 about the way things have turned out here. 369 01:28:34,580 --> 01:28:36,340 How was the bleeding? 370 01:28:40,740 --> 01:28:41,940 The bleeding? 371 01:28:42,340 --> 01:28:44,500 No, not him. 372 01:28:46,100 --> 01:28:48,660 The retard, when you cut his thumb off. 373 01:28:49,540 --> 01:28:52,700 Louis told me you were concerned. 374 01:28:58,700 --> 01:28:59,980 Bleeding was fine. 375 01:29:01,940 --> 01:29:03,020 Fine? 376 01:29:03,900 --> 01:29:05,540 It was all right. 377 01:29:08,660 --> 01:29:10,580 Okay. Good. 378 01:29:17,380 --> 01:29:21,820 I didn't need your help, you know. I could have beaten these charges. 379 01:29:23,980 --> 01:29:25,780 What were you thinking? 380 01:29:26,420 --> 01:29:29,180 You were gonna extort a federal prosecutor. 381 01:29:30,500 --> 01:29:32,500 You thought you could say: 382 01:29:34,420 --> 01:29:38,780 "Kidnapped your little brother, drop all charges," and the guy'd roll over? 383 01:29:40,780 --> 01:29:44,140 You didn't think all hell wouldn't break loose? 384 01:29:45,620 --> 01:29:48,700 You didn't think every fucking fed... 385 01:29:49,460 --> 01:29:51,780 wouldn't drop what they were doing... 386 01:29:51,900 --> 01:29:55,100 and dive in to protect one of their own? 387 01:29:56,940 --> 01:29:59,420 What do you morons think... 388 01:29:59,980 --> 01:30:02,100 this is Little Italy? 389 01:30:03,900 --> 01:30:05,060 Wake up! 390 01:30:05,140 --> 01:30:08,620 This is the twenty-fucking-first century! 391 01:30:22,500 --> 01:30:23,660 So now... 392 01:30:27,260 --> 01:30:28,740 things are bad. 393 01:30:31,060 --> 01:30:33,860 And whether you wanna call a thumb... 394 01:30:34,300 --> 01:30:36,660 a finger or a digit... 395 01:30:37,220 --> 01:30:40,980 for the sake of this discussion, it doesn't really matter. 396 01:30:41,420 --> 01:30:42,820 You know why? 397 01:30:43,540 --> 01:30:46,660 Because whatever you choose to call it... 398 01:30:48,020 --> 01:30:49,300 a thumb... 399 01:30:50,100 --> 01:30:51,780 has a fingerprint... 400 01:30:53,060 --> 01:30:55,340 and the one you sent... 401 01:30:56,260 --> 01:30:59,340 had the wrong fucking one. 402 01:31:02,380 --> 01:31:05,780 - Mr. Starkman... - I know my fucking name... 403 01:31:06,180 --> 01:31:08,100 you piece of shit! 404 01:31:13,300 --> 01:31:15,820 You don't try to extort... 405 01:31:15,860 --> 01:31:19,260 a federal fucking prosecutor! 406 01:31:22,100 --> 01:31:23,500 And if you do... 407 01:31:25,900 --> 01:31:28,940 you don't fuck around! 408 01:31:34,580 --> 01:31:35,860 Fuck this. 409 01:31:36,260 --> 01:31:38,020 Cutting off his thumb was a stupid order. 410 01:31:38,100 --> 01:31:41,900 We would have been derelict in our responsibilities if we had followed it. 411 01:31:43,540 --> 01:31:44,620 Hello. 412 01:31:44,660 --> 01:31:46,580 How long could we have kept below radar... 413 01:31:46,620 --> 01:31:48,860 with a thumbless, bleeding half-wit? 414 01:31:49,820 --> 01:31:51,740 You see, sometimes... 415 01:31:52,180 --> 01:31:55,980 one has to use their professional prerogative... 416 01:31:56,900 --> 01:31:58,980 to override a dumb request. 417 01:32:01,020 --> 01:32:02,660 With all due respect... 418 01:32:02,740 --> 01:32:05,700 even at this point if you were to ask us... 419 01:32:06,260 --> 01:32:09,380 to pursue a course of action that would be... 420 01:32:09,900 --> 01:32:13,140 let's say, contrary to your best interests... 421 01:32:13,940 --> 01:32:16,220 then as awkward as it might be... 422 01:32:17,340 --> 01:32:19,100 we would have to take exception. 423 01:32:24,500 --> 01:32:26,860 Aside from those of us in this room... 424 01:32:26,940 --> 01:32:30,380 there's only one person, really, that can link you to this fuckup. 425 01:32:32,420 --> 01:32:35,060 And I feel that we should... 426 01:32:36,660 --> 01:32:39,260 rectify that problem as soon as we can. 427 01:32:42,100 --> 01:32:45,100 I think I'd much prefer just to... 428 01:32:46,660 --> 01:32:47,940 you know... 429 01:32:49,420 --> 01:32:51,020 end it right here. 430 01:32:54,300 --> 01:32:57,460 And that would be your professional prerogative. 431 01:32:58,300 --> 01:33:01,220 If you think that having that kid picked up by the authorities... 432 01:33:01,300 --> 01:33:05,460 and telling them all about being kidnapped in an attempt to save your ass makes sense. 433 01:33:06,780 --> 01:33:09,740 If you think that's the best tactic to keep you out of jail. 434 01:33:10,700 --> 01:33:14,340 If you think that's any less dumb than asking to have his finger cut off... 435 01:33:15,100 --> 01:33:18,420 well, then that would be the thing that you should do. 436 01:33:21,900 --> 01:33:23,540 But if you don't... 437 01:33:24,340 --> 01:33:26,740 then let us take the thorn out of your side. 438 01:33:27,460 --> 01:33:31,700 Let us make sure that kid will never be able to testify against anybody. 439 01:33:34,500 --> 01:33:37,300 And if after that you're still not happy... 440 01:33:38,580 --> 01:33:40,580 then we can all talk again. 441 01:33:48,540 --> 01:33:51,300 - You were kidding, right? - What do you think? 442 01:33:51,700 --> 01:33:54,900 We'll take Brian back to where you found him and get out of here. 443 01:33:56,500 --> 01:33:57,940 Are we going to the Baywatch now? 444 01:33:58,580 --> 01:34:01,580 No, we can't go to the Baywatch now. Take you later. 445 01:34:06,940 --> 01:34:08,820 Maybe this is it. Maybe this is the thing. 446 01:34:08,860 --> 01:34:11,740 Maybe this is a sign coming from nowhere, from out of the blue... 447 01:34:11,820 --> 01:34:16,020 just telling me it's time. It's time to get out. It's time to do it. 448 01:34:23,740 --> 01:34:26,660 {y:i}When I'm alone in my room {y:i}Sometimes I stare at the wall 449 01:34:26,740 --> 01:34:29,500 {y:i}and in the back of my mind {y:i}I hear my conscience call 450 01:34:29,580 --> 01:34:32,340 {y:i}telling me I need a girl {y:i}who's as sweet as a dove 451 01:34:32,420 --> 01:34:35,580 {y:i}For the first time in my life I see {y:i}I need love 452 01:34:35,700 --> 01:34:38,900 {y:i}So if you know who you are {y:i}why don't you make yourself seen 453 01:34:39,060 --> 01:34:42,260 {y:i}take a chance with my love {y:i}you'll find out what I mean 454 01:34:42,300 --> 01:34:43,820 {y:i}I need love 455 01:34:48,660 --> 01:34:49,780 {y:i}I need love 456 01:34:49,860 --> 01:34:52,740 Let me ask you something. You got a girlfriend? 457 01:34:57,020 --> 01:34:58,380 No, I don't. 458 01:34:59,420 --> 01:35:00,860 Let me do something for you. 459 01:35:00,940 --> 01:35:04,660 You know, make up for all the problems I caused you. 460 01:35:05,780 --> 01:35:09,220 Because I see you're a little nervous around women. Right? 461 01:35:09,460 --> 01:35:13,340 Let me tell you something. You got no reason to be shy. There's no magic to it. 462 01:35:13,500 --> 01:35:18,180 Let me tell you this thing that I heard, and I'm starting to believe that it's true. 463 01:35:18,380 --> 01:35:19,620 You know? 464 01:35:19,700 --> 01:35:23,140 It's that the thing you're most afraid of in life... 465 01:35:23,580 --> 01:35:27,580 if you do it, if you step up, good things will happen. 466 01:35:28,300 --> 01:35:31,340 You see a girl that you like that you're scared to talk to... 467 01:35:31,420 --> 01:35:33,060 bro, step up. 468 01:35:34,460 --> 01:35:35,740 Go up to her and say: 469 01:35:36,180 --> 01:35:39,340 "Hi, how are you today? Nice weather we're having." 470 01:35:39,380 --> 01:35:42,700 Take it from there, wherever the conversation goes. You try it. 471 01:35:42,780 --> 01:35:45,180 Try it with me. Practice. Go ahead. 472 01:35:45,340 --> 01:35:46,860 Hello, how are you today? 473 01:35:47,940 --> 01:35:50,060 Try it with me. Go ahead. Just say it. 474 01:35:51,220 --> 01:35:53,140 Hello, how are you today? 475 01:35:55,060 --> 01:35:56,980 Come on, Brian. Hello. 476 01:36:00,860 --> 01:36:02,100 How are you today? 477 01:36:03,500 --> 01:36:05,100 "How are you today?" 478 01:36:05,460 --> 01:36:07,420 Nice weather we're having. 479 01:36:10,820 --> 01:36:12,260 "Nice weather we're having." 480 01:36:12,460 --> 01:36:16,180 There you go. You see how he did it? It's because you stepped up, Brian. 481 01:36:16,220 --> 01:36:19,940 If you're afraid, step up and good things start to happen. Am I right? 482 01:36:21,420 --> 01:36:24,060 - I stepped up. - Step it up, pimp. 483 01:36:24,820 --> 01:36:26,980 That's how you move. Step it up. 484 01:36:38,580 --> 01:36:41,420 So, now that we're partners in crime... 485 01:36:42,420 --> 01:36:44,420 how about telling me your real name. 486 01:36:45,900 --> 01:36:47,940 The reason that I ask that... 487 01:36:48,020 --> 01:36:51,340 is because I don't know if you gave it any thought since last night... 488 01:36:51,540 --> 01:36:52,860 but I've been thinking about it. 489 01:36:52,940 --> 01:36:57,460 And seeing... You know, looks like now we're both going to be leaving. 490 01:36:58,740 --> 01:37:00,700 So I thought, you know... 491 01:37:01,060 --> 01:37:02,580 All right, look. 492 01:37:02,740 --> 01:37:05,380 I'm gonna lay it all out there for you right now. 493 01:37:05,460 --> 01:37:09,340 I'm just gonna say it, because, you know, here I am. 494 01:37:10,420 --> 01:37:11,980 - I think... - Larry. 495 01:37:13,900 --> 01:37:16,940 You know I haven't done this kind of thing hardly ever. 496 01:37:16,980 --> 01:37:18,460 The whole man thing... 497 01:37:18,540 --> 01:37:21,660 doesn't really hold that much for me, usually. 498 01:37:22,420 --> 01:37:23,580 I know. 499 01:37:24,500 --> 01:37:26,540 But somehow you got through. 500 01:37:28,300 --> 01:37:29,460 Somehow. 501 01:37:32,700 --> 01:37:34,260 But in the end... 502 01:37:36,500 --> 01:37:40,820 I don't think I could ever be what you really want. 503 01:37:54,900 --> 01:37:58,500 - So where do you think you'll go? - I don't know. 504 01:38:02,980 --> 01:38:04,500 Somewhere clean. 505 01:38:08,660 --> 01:38:10,980 You know, Northern California... 506 01:38:12,100 --> 01:38:13,500 Oregon maybe. 507 01:38:14,540 --> 01:38:17,300 You could just drop me off near the Pacific Coast Highway... 508 01:38:17,340 --> 01:38:20,180 - and I'll figure it out from there. - Okay. 509 01:38:21,860 --> 01:38:25,980 After that, Brian, I think it's gonna be time to go home. 510 01:38:28,940 --> 01:38:31,180 We just left there a little while ago, though. 511 01:38:31,220 --> 01:38:34,460 I don't mean my apartment. I mean, you know, the place where you live. 512 01:38:34,540 --> 01:38:36,060 Where I got you. 513 01:38:38,740 --> 01:38:40,540 What, you mean to stay? 514 01:38:42,260 --> 01:38:43,980 Yeah, buddy. To stay. 515 01:39:39,940 --> 01:39:41,260 Oh, my God. 516 01:39:49,460 --> 01:39:51,980 - It's open. Oh, my God. - What are you doing? Sit down. 517 01:39:52,020 --> 01:39:54,340 - Oh, my God. I'm gonna go. - Brian, what? 518 01:39:54,420 --> 01:39:56,140 - What's he talking about? - They're open. 519 01:39:58,740 --> 01:40:01,620 They're open. Oh, my God. The Baywatch. 520 01:40:02,180 --> 01:40:03,380 They're open! 521 01:40:05,020 --> 01:40:06,620 - Cowabunga! - Oh, my God. 522 01:40:06,700 --> 01:40:07,980 That's the Baywatch? 523 01:40:08,220 --> 01:40:10,020 It's open. It's the Baywatch. 524 01:40:11,140 --> 01:40:12,460 Hello there! 525 01:40:14,340 --> 01:40:16,420 I can't believe this. 526 01:40:16,900 --> 01:40:19,500 - I can't believe. Stop. - We can't stop now. 527 01:40:19,620 --> 01:40:22,060 No, we have to stop! 528 01:40:22,140 --> 01:40:25,540 No, Larry, no! They're here. We're here. 529 01:40:26,620 --> 01:40:29,580 I know. We can't, though. I'm sorry. We can't stop. 530 01:40:29,620 --> 01:40:31,340 - We're here. Come on. - We're here. 531 01:40:31,380 --> 01:40:32,820 - We're right here. - Brian. 532 01:40:32,900 --> 01:40:35,220 Wait. That's it. We're right here. 533 01:40:39,540 --> 01:40:43,020 Wait a second. Wait. So turn around now, okay? 534 01:40:56,100 --> 01:40:57,380 All right. 535 01:41:01,380 --> 01:41:02,980 What do you think? 536 01:41:08,620 --> 01:41:12,140 - Can I go down there? - Brian, you can't go down there, no. 537 01:41:14,100 --> 01:41:16,620 I mean, we're not allowed down there. 538 01:41:17,620 --> 01:41:19,300 Plus, we got to go soon. 539 01:41:20,540 --> 01:41:23,500 Please? Please, can I go down there? 540 01:41:24,060 --> 01:41:26,660 You know, Brian, I don't even think... 541 01:41:28,180 --> 01:41:32,100 This might not even be the Baywatch. I think this is probably something else. 542 01:41:35,540 --> 01:41:37,340 Larry, you promised me. 543 01:41:40,020 --> 01:41:41,540 You promised me. 544 01:41:47,340 --> 01:41:49,740 - It's right there. - I know. 545 01:41:50,980 --> 01:41:52,740 Just for five minutes? 546 01:41:58,500 --> 01:42:00,820 Brian, what's your brother's name? 547 01:42:03,780 --> 01:42:07,180 My brother's name is stinky Jimmy Dorf. Want to know why? 548 01:42:07,820 --> 01:42:09,860 Yeah, some other time, I do. 549 01:42:10,140 --> 01:42:13,860 Yeah, Los Angeles. The U.S. Courthouse. The office of a James Dorf. 550 01:42:15,380 --> 01:42:18,860 - Because... Do you want to know why? - Yeah. 551 01:42:19,860 --> 01:42:21,860 Because sometimes he smells like fish. 552 01:42:22,460 --> 01:42:23,700 No, I don't think so. 553 01:42:23,820 --> 01:42:27,580 Yeah, I'll give you my name. Give me a minute. Hold on. I forgot it. 554 01:42:41,100 --> 01:42:42,700 Brian, look at me. 555 01:42:44,220 --> 01:42:48,340 I think your brother and his friends are gonna be here soon to pick you up. 556 01:42:48,380 --> 01:42:49,340 Okay? 557 01:42:52,940 --> 01:42:55,020 I want you to know something. 558 01:42:57,180 --> 01:42:58,380 You're a good kid. 559 01:43:00,420 --> 01:43:02,460 I'm sorry about all the... 560 01:43:05,780 --> 01:43:07,620 I'm sorry for being... 561 01:43:15,460 --> 01:43:16,740 I'm sorry. 562 01:43:22,340 --> 01:43:23,580 I think you're wrong. 563 01:43:26,260 --> 01:43:28,580 I think that is the Baywatch right there. 564 01:43:33,180 --> 01:43:35,020 Who knows. Maybe it is. 565 01:43:37,020 --> 01:43:40,020 I'm a genius, man. I knew it. 566 01:43:43,540 --> 01:43:46,060 You take good care of yourself, Brian. 567 01:43:57,420 --> 01:43:59,740 You take good care of yourself, Larry. 568 01:44:02,500 --> 01:44:03,660 I'll do that. 569 01:44:06,860 --> 01:44:10,340 Brian, let me ask you something. How do your fingernails look? 570 01:44:11,820 --> 01:44:14,580 - My fingernails? - Your fingernails, how are they looking? 571 01:44:18,900 --> 01:44:21,500 - Don't say nothing. - They look very good. 572 01:44:22,340 --> 01:44:24,180 I got A-plus nails. 573 01:44:24,980 --> 01:44:27,940 - I give an A-plus for fingernails. - Never mind. Okay. Good. 574 01:44:28,420 --> 01:44:29,380 Go ahead. 575 01:44:40,020 --> 01:44:41,140 Go on. 576 01:44:47,700 --> 01:44:51,060 I don't know how you're thinking about getting out of here or whatever... 577 01:44:51,140 --> 01:44:52,940 what your plans are... 578 01:44:56,220 --> 01:44:58,220 but I think you should take my car. 579 01:44:59,700 --> 01:45:01,740 Go ahead, take it. Take it. 580 01:45:04,820 --> 01:45:06,780 I couldn't do that, Larry. 581 01:45:10,860 --> 01:45:13,820 I'd rather... You know, I'd prefer if you had it. 582 01:45:14,740 --> 01:45:17,660 It's a good car, and I want you to be all right. 583 01:45:18,500 --> 01:45:22,060 And I know that it'll get you wherever you need to go. 584 01:45:22,100 --> 01:45:24,140 So just, you know, take it. 585 01:45:24,340 --> 01:45:26,580 I was thinking about getting rid of it anyway. 586 01:45:27,700 --> 01:45:29,860 I'm trying to change my image. 587 01:45:34,420 --> 01:45:35,980 Go ahead, take it. 588 01:45:39,500 --> 01:45:40,620 Please. 589 01:45:48,980 --> 01:45:50,060 Okay. 590 01:45:52,180 --> 01:45:54,820 - I will, thank you. - Don't mention it. 591 01:45:56,260 --> 01:45:58,380 Just do me one favor, though. 592 01:46:00,140 --> 01:46:01,300 Name it. 593 01:46:02,020 --> 01:46:05,820 As far as the lesbian thing goes... 594 01:46:07,780 --> 01:46:08,820 Yeah? 595 01:46:10,260 --> 01:46:12,700 ...if you do ever think about hopping the fence... 596 01:46:14,860 --> 01:46:16,660 promise you'll give me a call first. 597 01:47:06,260 --> 01:47:09,020 {y:i}Okay, ladies and gentlemen, listen up. 598 01:47:10,820 --> 01:47:13,060 {y:i}Camera is ready and picture is up. 599 01:47:13,140 --> 01:47:16,620 {y:i}I need all dancers to first position {y:i}as soon as possible. 600 01:47:16,980 --> 01:47:20,100 {y:i}All dancers to first position {y:i}as soon as possible. Let's go. 601 01:47:57,860 --> 01:48:02,140 {y:i}Okay, listen up, guys. {y:i}Can we please finish pairing up, everyone? 602 01:48:02,340 --> 01:48:05,100 {y:i}Come on, guys, {y:i}it's not like you're mating for life. 603 01:48:05,260 --> 01:48:07,820 {y:i}As the old song goes. ; {y:i}"just love the one you're with." 604 01:48:07,980 --> 01:48:09,700 {y:i}Find someone to love. 605 01:48:35,100 --> 01:48:37,180 Come on, Brian. Dance with someone. 606 01:48:43,940 --> 01:48:45,380 Nice weather we're having. 607 01:48:46,900 --> 01:48:48,940 Yes, it's very nice. 608 01:48:57,220 --> 01:48:58,180 It is? 609 01:49:00,020 --> 01:49:04,100 Yes. But the weather's always very nice around here, isn't it? 610 01:49:05,140 --> 01:49:06,140 Yes. 611 01:49:08,980 --> 01:49:12,460 And a 10% chance of precipitation for low-lying coastal regions... 612 01:49:12,500 --> 01:49:15,300 extending from New South Wales to Victoria. 613 01:49:23,500 --> 01:49:25,060 {y:i}And playback. 614 01:49:26,700 --> 01:49:28,380 {y:i}And action. 615 01:50:53,780 --> 01:50:54,980 Rochelle. 616 01:50:56,660 --> 01:50:57,580 What? 617 01:50:58,580 --> 01:51:01,300 Rochelle. That's my real name. 618 01:51:13,340 --> 01:51:15,220 So, Rochelle... 619 01:51:16,940 --> 01:51:19,180 does this mean you decided to hop the fence? 620 01:51:19,780 --> 01:51:21,260 I wouldn't go that far. 621 01:51:22,380 --> 01:51:25,620 But I figured since I helped get you into all this... 622 01:51:26,700 --> 01:51:29,900 the least I could do is offer you a ride out of town. 623 01:51:31,820 --> 01:51:33,140 Fair enough. 624 01:51:48,140 --> 01:51:49,180 What? 625 01:51:50,420 --> 01:51:53,540 You know, I bet you'd look awesome in some mascara. 626 01:51:58,220 --> 01:52:01,380 - I'm not sure how to take that. - It's a compliment. 627 01:52:02,060 --> 01:52:03,100 Yeah? 628 01:52:03,620 --> 01:52:07,340 Like your mother said, life's not always black-and-white. 629 01:52:08,700 --> 01:52:10,300 Sometimes you just never know. 630 01:52:11,220 --> 01:52:13,100 Are you driving or bullshitting? 631 01:52:15,100 --> 01:52:16,460 I'm driving. 632 01:55:26,780 --> 01:55:30,300 {y:i}I like big butts and I cannot lie 633 01:55:30,540 --> 01:55:32,620 {y:i}The other brothers can't deny 634 01:55:32,660 --> 01:55:34,900 {y:i}When the girls walk in {y:i}with an itty-bitty waist 635 01:55:34,980 --> 01:55:38,980 {y:i}And round things in your face {y:i}You get sprung, wanna pull up tough 636 01:55:39,060 --> 01:55:41,100 {y:i}'Cause you noticed that butt was stuffed 637 01:55:41,180 --> 01:55:43,420 {y:i}'Cause I'm long, and I'm strong 638 01:55:43,500 --> 01:55:45,100 {y:i}And I'm down to get the friction on 639 01:55:45,140 --> 01:55:46,740 {y:i}So, ladies, yeah 640 01:55:46,820 --> 01:55:47,780 {y:i}Ladies, yeah 641 01:55:47,860 --> 01:55:50,700 {y:i}If you wanna roll in my Mercedes {y:i}Yeah 642 01:55:50,780 --> 01:55:54,780 {y:i}So turn around! Stick it out! {y:i}Even white boys got to shout 643 01:55:54,860 --> 01:55:55,820 {y:i}Baby got back! 644 01:55:57,620 --> 01:55:59,060 {y:i}Baby got back! 119323