Original subtitles

Short is short, but that's ridiculous.

Turn that around a little bit, baby.

We could lengthen it.

We could just lengthen it.

Lengthen it?

You can shorten that dress, you can't lengthen

it.

Where are you going to get the material

from?

How many of these rags did we make

anyway?

Don't ask.

How many did we sell?

Don't ask that either.

Well, I think it's cute.

Sissy, please!

Please.

Lower that hand.

We're ruined.

A whole line down the tubes.

$200,000 kaput!

Everything we worked for all these years.

Sorry, Harry.

It's all my fault.

I guess short for this year, I guess

wrong.

You promised me a masterpiece.

It's grotesque!

Even I can't sell it.

Harry, if you can't sell it, nobody can

sell it.

What are we going to do?

Oh, I know.

Can we use your wife's trust fund?

I can't touch the principal.

What about our partnership insurance?

$100,000?

What about it?

I'd commit suicide.

Marv!

It's my fault!

Marv, don't talk foolish.

You're not going to kill yourself.

Neither am I.

We could flip a coin.

Marv, you're hysterical.

Harry, I'm sorry.

What are we going to do?

Hit me again, partner.

So, first we took Bootsy Hickman's poodle to

get this permanent at Fashion Mall.

And then we went boutique shopping.

Oh, I saw the most adorable outfit.

And a pair of pants.

Très chic.

I got two.

One in fuchsia and one in lime.

It was cultured clothes classics.

Isn't that Ralph Zitwal's line?

Yeah.

Aren't you going to ruin your appetite, baby?

Don't do that to me, Harry.

I'm just clearing my palate before dinner.

Listen, what happened to the new line?

You know, I went into all the stores.

None of them are carrying it.

They're not carrying it because it's a turkey.

I thought it was kind of cute.

Marv Castelmo's brainstormed.

The world is into flesh these days, he

tells me.

So what's wrong with flesh?

The new line is burying us, baby.

The wolf is at the door.

If we don't meet our obligations, the bank

is going to put the padlock on.

We lose everything.

The house, the trip to Europe.

My God, Harry.

The Mercedes.

The Mercedes?

Yeah.

Harry.

Harry, what are we going to do?

If only we could get hold of my

trust fund.

Forget your trust fund.

Marv Castelmo should pay for it.

It was his mistake.

He certainly should, especially with that rotten line.

Something happened to Marvin.

Happened?

I got partnership insurance with Marvin.

$100,000.

Yeah, but doesn't he have to be dead

before you can collect that?

He has got to be very dead.

Harry.

Harry.

Marvin is your partner.

He's your best friend.

I mean, you've been inseparable for years.

Like I say, friendship is one thing, but

business is business.

Harry, I mean, you're talking about murder.

Yeah, I was talking about a measly, dumb

murder.

I'm talking about a perfect murder.

Oh, honey, everybody's always talking about a perfect

murder.

Then they do one little thing wrong and

they get caught.

I plan on getting caught.

I give up.

I surrender.

In fact, if you help me, I'm going

to try to get away when I murder

Marvin.

Me?

What do I have to do with it?

You know, Marv, Castlemore has always liked you.

Me?

He likes me?

Why not?

Look at you.

You're a delectable woman.

I mean, why do you think he's been

a bachelor all these years?

He's been carrying a torch for you.

If you waved your little finger, he'd break

both legs running.

Harry.

Yeah.

Are you trying to say that you want

me to have an affair with this funny,

silly Marvin Castlemore?

Oh, Harry.

Why not?

Why not let the jerk have a little

bliss before he dies?

Baby, I like it here in Wilmington, Delaware.

Delaware is a great state.

They got a law written down that says

if a husband finds somebody in the act

of adultery and he kills them, it's not

a murder.

It's not even manslaughter.

It's a misdemeanour!

It's a $100 fine!

I know.

That's all for killing somebody?

Yeah.

We saved the house.

We saved the business.

The Mercedes!

We'll buy a new one.

Oh, I don't know, Harry.

It's very risky, darling.

Are you sure you wouldn't mind me having

a little fling?

Oh, like I always say, baby, a fling

is one thing, but a business is business.

Oh, Harry.

Oh, I like it here in Wilmington, Delaware.

I really like it here.

Hey, Max, it's a wonderful day, baby.

Keep that line moving.

Mr. Sanchez, una sonrisa.

You are doing a wonderful job.

A stitch in time saves nine.

I like that.

Oh, yeah, that is different.

Different and daring.

Daring and different.

That is definitely different.

Different and daring.

Daring and different.

Wonderful.

I think you got a winner there now,

partner.

Harry, I think you're crazy.

Harry, I think you're crazy.

What?

That is a rag.

You're right.

I mean, no one would be caught dead

by anything like that.

Mom, this business is full of surprises.

I think that is definitely a trendsetter.

Harry, why are you so happy?

What's there to be happy?

I got a beautiful wife.

I got a wonderful partner.

I got a great business.

Harry, two men from the bank were here

today.

They're taking inventory.

They're taking inventory.

It is going to be all right, my

dear.

Mom, give it a little stroll, will you,

babe?

Let's see how that rag walks.

Oh, yes.

That is definitely a work of art.

That is a work of art.

Harry, you're crazy.

Harry, we are finished.

We are finished.

Mom, Mom, now I'm worried about your health.

You got to learn how to relax.

Why don't you come over to the house

tonight?

We'll have some laughs.

You bring a date.

We'll have a little barbecue, a little cha

cha-cha.

You know, just this morning, Roberto was saying,

how is old Marv?

You know she likes you.

She's looking forward to seeing you.

Knock him dead, babe.

It's going to knock him dead.

Oh, yeah.

How do I look, darling?

How do I look, then?

You look fantastic, darling.

If you weren't my wife, I'd make a

play for you myself.

I'm a little nervous, Harry.

What's to be nervous?

A little fling with Marvin is going to

be the best thing in the world for

both of you.

The fling doesn't bother me.

I mean, it bothers me.

I feel bad about doing it, of course.

No, I meant later.

Killing Marv?

Hold it a second.

A trip to Europe.

You want to cancel the trip to Europe?

We can't cancel the trip to Europe.

You want him to repossess the Mercedes?

Never.

All right, then.

As soon as you hook Marvin, I want

you to flaunt it.

I want the whole world to know what's

happening.

Harry, it's one thing to have an affair,

but it's uncouth to flaunt it.

Justification.

When I kill Marvin, I want everybody to

know I had justification.

Harry, you are a very deep person.

All right, that's Marvin.

Everything is up to you, baby.

Harry, whatever this looks like, I just want

you to know I'm doing this for you

and the Mercedes.

You're magnificent.

Hey, I didn't know you guys were a

number.

Oh, Harry, it's strictly business.

You're walking out of time.

It's so embarrassing wearing this thing in public.

That's all right, baby.

You look a dream.

Roberta, hon, this is Marv's dig.

Sissy.

Malonka.

Sissy Malonka.

Wow, Roberta's dying to see you.

Come on.

I like that dress.

It's tray...

cute.

Long time no see, Marv.

Hi, Roberta.

Now, on this special occasion, I would like

to propose toast.

To my beautiful wife, Roberta.

To my wonderful friend, Marv Castlemore.

And to the great city of Wilmington, Delaware.

I didn't know you and Marvin were an

item.

Oh, it's all business, Harry.

He says he's approving me for an executive

position.

Oh!

Harry, you're such a wonderful work.

You travel all the time, and you work

till I tell if you're boss or Marvin.

Marvin, I'm still young and attractive.

Oh, yeah, you're very...

What?

Attractive.

You're so...

You're very attractive.

You know what I am?

What?

A seedless grape withering on the vine.

You're not a seedless grape.

You're noble.

You make a beautiful wine.

You're luscious.

Marv, what do you want to do to

me?

My God, I want to make wine.

Shh, not now, not yet.

Harry is leaving tomorrow for a week in

New England.

Oh, you won't be back, and I have

to see you.

I have to be near you.

I have to be close to you.

Roberta.

Oh, yes.

You're spilling your drink in my lap.

Oh, Marv, I'm sorry.

It's okay.

It feels good.

What are you thinking, Harry?

I was thinking about the business.

Is business all right, Harry?

Business has never been better.

Bankruptcy.

Mo, that's crazy.

Fabulous fox has never been healthier, man.

Right.

Mo, I'm leaving right away.

I'll be in Boston in a couple of

hours.

Why don't we go out tonight, have some

drinks?

A little disco, baby, huh?

Cha-cha-cha.

Oh, la-la-la-la.

That Mo Osgood, what a fun guy.

I understand it, Harry.

Why so chipper?

Our business is going under.

Marv, don't be such a worrier.

You only live once, my friend.

Try to have a good time.

Cha-cha-cha-cha-cha-cha-cha-cha

cha-cha-cha-cha.

La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la.

Pick up line one, Mr. Castle.

Yeah.

Uh, Mrs. Elton.

Roberta.

I mean, Roberta.

Harry just left.

Oh, good.

Marvin, you come right over here.

I'm waiting for you.

The front door will be unlocked.

I'm upstairs, darling.

Where?

Upstairs.

In here, lover.

Hello, Marvin.

Come here, Marvin.

Oh, darling, my favourite chocolates.

Sit down, Marvin.

Make yourself comfortable.

Oh, I just love chocolates in the afternoon.

Yeah, Harry.

Everything's fine here.

Another week.

Yeah, yeah, sure.

Yeah, sure.

I am relaxed.

I am very, very relaxed.

Marv.

Just a second, Harry.

Mrs. Elton's here to see you.

Harry, I've got to run.

Yeah, sure, take all the time you want.

A week, ten days.

Zip on down to New York.

Have a ball.

Yeah, I'm feeling real fine.

Thanks, Harry.

Bye.

I'll send Mrs. Elton in.

She has some brass, that woman.

Sissy.

This is the third time she's been here

this week, throwing herself at you like that.

Mrs. Elton and I are discussing business.

I can imagine.

What business?

You're not fooling anyone, Marv.

Poor Harry.

On your way out, Sissy, close the door

behind you.

Darling.

Oh, darling.

Oh, darling, you have to...

Oh, forgive me.

Please forgive me.

I tried not to come.

I tried...

Oh, this thing between us is stronger than

I am.

Wait, hold on.

Watch the water.

Oh, darling.

Oh, you have to forgive me.

Poor Harry.

You know, I talked to Harry today.

What did he say?

I don't understand him.

He seems to enjoy being on the road.

Then let him stay.

But it seems like he should be a

little suspicious by now.

I feel terrible about...

Uh-oh.

Ralph Zipfall.

Don't look, don't look.

Cultured clothes?

Classics?

Yes, he's got the biggest mouth in town.

Don't look.

Hello, Ralph.

How are you doing?

Well, I'm not ashamed of our love.

It almost seems like you want Harry to

know about us.

What if he does?

This is Wilmington, Delaware.

People take a dim view of this sort

of thing.

What sort of thing?

Adultery.

Adultery?

Is that what you think we're doing?

Well, technically...

Technically?

Technically, it's...

Technically?

How can you be technical about our love?

Well, I mean, it's sort of like...

Marvin, do you love me?

Yes, I love you.

Really, really?

Yes, I love you.

I love you.

Well, then Wilmington, Delaware can go fly a

kite.

I don't care who knows about our love.

Including my husband, Harry Elton.

Hi, Ralph.

The drunk says to the lady, who is

that pig?

She says, that's not a pig.

That's my dog.

He says, I know.

I'm talking to the dog.

Gotta hand it to you, Harry, the way

you're dealing with this pressure.

What pressure?

Business failing and those other rumours.

What rumours?

Maybe I shouldn't be the one to tell

you about it.

What?

I was talking to Ralph Zitzwald.

Your partner and your wife.

Yeah.

They're having an affair, Harry.

Marv, my wife, having an affair?

Come on, Joe.

Ralph says everyone knows about it.

She visits them at your office and they

lock the door.

Knows about what, Marv?

Castlemore's my oldest, dearest friend.

What are you talking about, Joe?

Sorry to disturb you, Mr. Elton.

This telegram just came for you.

Oh, yeah.

Thank you.

Oh, my God.

What is it?

Oh.

If you want to know where your partner

is, find out where your wife is, her

friend.

I'm sorry, Harry.

I'll talk to you tomorrow.

No!

I'll talk to you tomorrow, Harry.

No!

No!

Harry!

Harry, don't do anything crazy.

821.

Honey, I got the telegram.

I'll be in Wilmington by 11 o'clock.

Make sure Marv is with you.

Huh?

Hey, come on.

Don't cop out now.

It's almost over.

Think about the Mercedes.

Just keep thinking about the Mercedes.

What's the matter, honey?

What's the matter?

Hey.

Something is the matter, isn't it?

What if you were about to lose something

that was very dear to you?

You're not talking about us, are you?

No, of course not.

Now, I meant something like a car or

like that.

Well, if it meant a great deal to

you, I'd do anything in the world to

help you save it.

Oh, Marv.

Oh, you make me feel so much better.

I just want you to know, no matter

what happens, I think you're a grand guy.

Come on.

What in the world could happen?

Well, you know, it's like Harry always says.

Love is one thing, but...

Business is business.

What was that?

I didn't hear anything.

I heard something.

The cat.

For a second, I thought it...

Oh, you thought it was Harry, didn't you?

Don't be silly.

He's still in New York.

Oh, give me a kiss.

Don't get dressed.

We've got to make this look good.

Sit right down in that chair.

I'll call the police.

We did it.

The only way I could get to the

trust fund was if she died.

$200,000!

Harry, we can relocate.

We can build a whole new plant.

We can move the whole operation to Philly.

Forget about Philly.

Why?

I like it here in Wilmington.

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