Original subtitles

The following programme contains strong language and violent scenes.

♪ FOLK UKE: Shit Makes The Flowers Grow ♪

♪ You're not good for nothing

♪ Don't let 'em tell you so

♪ Your life has a purpose

♪ And I think you oughta know

♪ Shit

♪ Makes the flowers grow

♪ Oh, shit

♪ Makes the flowers grow

♪ I wondered why you're here

♪ But now I know... ♪

Oh, my... Oh, my God!

OK...

Uh, OK...

Oh, sorry, I was, uh...

Uh, sorry, I...

What? No, nothing. Uh...

You look... Have you done something different?

Like, to your hair or... your face?

Oh, I brushed it.

Oh.

You should do it more often. It looks nice.

Oh... thanks.

Uh, sorry, what was it you wanted?

Uh, well, Seren said you were open to offers.

For the business, not, like, in general.

Uh, yeah, so... here.

What is it? It's the business agreement.

For Tommy's Transformations.

I wanna buy it.

Sorry, obviously I know it's a bit soon, but I thought,

"It's, like, one less thing for her to think about." And, you know,

I know it inside out... Anyway, here I am.

I have to go. Sorry.

♪ Swallow my tongue back of my throat

♪ Like it's finite

♪ Only so long I can chew till I choke

♪ Hide in plain sight

♪ What have you done? ♪ My rabbit run

♪ Caught in the headlights

♪ And I'm bigger now

♪ Oh, oh-oh-oh

♪ So say my name like I'm ten feet tall

♪ Bow your head like I'm royal

♪ And every day that I get older

♪ Bow your head like I'm royal

♪ I guess my blood's running colder. ♪

Maybe someone drowned.

Never actually seen that in real life.

Morning. Uh...

Morning! Uh, I thought someone

should make you a cup of tea for a change.

Uh... thanks.

Uh...

Creep!

How are we doing front page-wise, folks?

Speak to me.

AJ, first day, want to start us off?

Um, "Massive Disruption Amid Major Gas Works"?

There are some controversial suggestions from the public

about the proposed council budget.

Oh... boring!

Uh, pigeons have been attacking pedestrians

in the town centre again. Is there really nothing else?

Anyone? Anybody? Come on.

No Jeff today?

That's a shame.

Dead body.

What? - Dead body, everyone. - Yes!

Pulled from the canal this morning.

Oh, Jeff!

Sweetpea! Tea for Jeff.

Come on. What do we know?

Still waiting for more info. Oh, I could give my mate a call.

He lives on a barge down there. Excellent, AJ, excellent!

River folk always come in unexpectedly handy.

We should just wait...

It's a murder!

Um... on Meadowlane Lock.

The police were there this morning.

There are police in places. It doesn't mean it's a murder.

Could have been someone going for a walk, accident, suicide...

He was stabbed, actually.

Uh... on a night out.

Um...

I-I heard somebody talking about it on the bus.

- Ugh! Hearsay. - What? I mean, we should go down there, right?

Now that we actually know something.

Another great idea, AJ.

Your mum was right, you're a special, special lad.

I mean, it was Rhiannon. Come on, people, let's get going!

I'll leave that in your capable hands, sweetpea.

Murder! This is what we want.

Rhiannon speaking. How can I help you?

Male victim, late 20s, found in canal by jogger.

Cause of death:

fourteen stab wounds

to abdomen,

arms, legs,

hands, neck.

Jesus Christ! What kind of monster...?

'You still there?' Sorry. Yes, I'm still here.

No CCTV or weapon... I can't really hear you.

...and not much in way of trace evidence either.

No evidence? Nothing? So, they don't know who did it?

Oh, no, they know who did it, but they just thought,

"We'll let him crack on!"

Go on! The canal's compromised any DNA

they may have found. Full of shit, apparently.

Probably gang-related.

That many stab wounds. Ss... Ss...

Fourteen...

I-I think multiple people.

Like a West Side Story situation. Yeah.

- Right. - Right. It's probably some crazy man.

You know, frenzied attack, completely at random.

Let's see what we've got.

Well, we need an identity, obviously, and something else.

A quote from the family. Something spicy.

He was probably married with kids. Well, I can see if there's

any leaks online - or anything on the socials. - Yep.

When will the police formally identify?

No news yet. There'll be - a press conference soon. - OK.

Well, when there is, I want you down there.

OK! Go, go, go, people!

Yeah, alright.

Yes, don't worry.

Caught ya! What?

He's a bit of a prick, isn't he?

What are you gonna do? Shred it?

No! I'm... just...

...having a look.

It's always the quiet ones.

Can you read shorthand?

No. Sorry. Can you? No.

But I'm not the new junior reporter.

Oh! Alright.

I thought that there might be some more details

that Jeff hadn't shared about the, uh...

the-the...

uh, victim.

Are you alright?

What? No. Yeah. Fine, just, um...

uh, shaken, I guess. Hey, forget it.

It's, um...

It's grim. But... they'll catch him.

What? I'm sure of it.

Why?

- Why? - Yeah, why? Why are you sure? People get away with murders

all the time, don't they? I googled it. Actually...

62% of murders went unsolved in the UK last year.

So... Oh, yes.

But they didn't happen on our doorstep!

It's Columbo.

Hey!

Uh, good afternoon. The Gazette. Can I help you?

'Put me through to Norman.'

Can I ask who's calling?

'It's Jeff, obviously.'

Oh, uh...

Yeah, he is unavailable right now. Can I take a message?

'We have an identity. Look, get him to call me.

I have to stay here. I wanna see if I can get a quote-'

Name. Can I have a name?

'Excuse me? It's a bad signal.'

Norman wants a name.

'Ryan Lloyd. Look, can you tell him that-'

Ryan...

Oh!

Doc says I'm a ticking time bomb for a cardiovascular event.

OK.

Um...

Sorry, I...

I have a name and address.

You what? Uh, Ryan Lloyd,

34 Priory Gardens, CA43 5GU.

He lived with his mum. What? How did you-

I'd like to get that quote for you. Maybe we'll learn

why the killer did it. Oh, h-hang on, sweetpea.

Uh, this is Jeff's thing. Jeff had a puncture.

And we need to act now.

Right? Before anyone else gets there.

Uh...

Uh, this sort of thing needs, um... feminine energy,

if there's a grieving mum.

Don't you think?

I'm sorry, he wanted me to come, too.

It's fine.

It certainly beats vox pops on the high street

about pigeon fights. A person is dead.

No, yeah. Obviously.

Sorry.

Um...

Uh, my dad died.

And my dog, so...

Shit.

Yeah. That's a lot to deal with.

And so... it's, like, I'm going to someone's house to...

ask them how they feel about their loved one dying

and I already know how it feels, it feels... shit.

Like there's a fucking hole there, yeah.

I'm sorry that...

...you're going through that.

I mean, I'd be, like, mid-breakdown right now, but...

well, you're holding it together.

Or are you not?

Because it would be OK if you weren't.

I've been getting really...

angry, actually, really.

Like, really angry.

Not all the time, just sometimes.

But when I do, it's like...

...I save it all up, and then it just...

Bah!

You know, it just... It all comes out all at once.

I mean, I feel like that's pretty normal.

I was...

I was a total monster when my gran died.

Yeah? Yeah, I...

I kicked a wall...

...which broke my little toe.

Left a massive scuff, so...

Yeah, you're a monster.

Maybe no one's in.

Shit!

What? Uh, nothing.

There's just, um... a man.

Maybe this isn't a good idea. What?

Oh. Thank God.

I thought it was that bloody support officer again.

We're... We're actually from The Gazette.

Right. No, thank you! Wait!

Uh, we didn't-We're so sorry for your loss, Mrs Lloyd.

S-So sorry.

We know this must be an awful time for you.

Uh, we were just wondering if we could talk to you

about doing some sort of tribute to Ryan...

as a beloved member of our community?

Uh... a nice one?

Of course. We just...

...want to understand who he was...

...make sense of what happened to him.

"Death is nothing at all.

I've only slipped into the next room.

I am I, and you are you.

And whatever we were to each other...

...we are still."

It's, uh, Henry Scott-Holland.

Five minutes. Thank you, really.

Mind the step. Thanks.

Right. Thank you. Oh, no, after you.

Sorry for your loss.

Now, don't be polite.

You know, just take one. Thanks.

Love?

I've had so much sodding tea.

See, when he didn't come home...

I thought he was off having fun.

See, I can't believe that the monster who did this...

...that they're just out there.

Walking about.

I'll rip the skin off them

if I get hold of them.

You... You must have been close, then.

He wouldn't move out, would he, Al?

Not that we wanted him to.

He had a son? Oh... no.

That's his nephew. Logan.

Oh... God, Ryan was his hero.

Wanted to be just like him.

Even told his teacher he wanted to work in a call centre.

All cos of Ry.

That's really special. Yeah.

Till they sacked him.

Bastards!

Don't put that in. No.

Why did they sack him? Oh...

He wasn't aligned to their ethos.

God, some people are too sensitive.

Al was ready to go down there with a baseball bat.

You know, show that Dave Ferris bastard what's what,

weren't you, Al?

Normally, I can't shut him up.

I haven't had this much peace

since Spurs lost 7-2 to Bayern Munich in 2022-

Sorry, who's Dave Ferris? Maybe you could tell us

some nice stories about Ryan, just that sum him up as a person.

I keep thinking he's gonna walk through that door any minute.

Sorry, can I use the toilet?

I was just...

Just gonna see if she's... Oh! Oh, hi.

Uh, AJ, we should be going now, don't you think?

Uh... yeah!

Yeah, I've got a lovely quote about- Great! Cool.

Uh, sorry, I think the lock might be stuck.

Oh! Never mind. Sorry, I think she's...

Thank you. Thank you for the tea.

And please be nice about him. Yeah.

I don't get it. I mean...

have you ever put someone's face on a mug?

You OK?

Did it all get too much back there? - Can we make a stop? - Yeah.

72 Covenden Road. Why?

Dave Ferris lives there. What, that guy she mentioned?

I found this in Ryan's room. It's a restraining order.

Ryan got dismissed for inappropriate conduct

and then they sent this - cos he wouldn't stay away. - What?

You... You went into a dead man's bedroom?

What? Well, nothing, but...

He was murdered. Doesn't matter if he was an arsehole.

No. We need to find out if he deserved to die.

What?

You know what I mean. No, I don't.

I just...

I think there could be something in it, that's all.

For the story.

It would really piss Jeff off.

Hi! Excuse me.

Are you Dave?

Murdered? Yeah.

How?

Fourteen stab wounds. Christ!

Dave, what did he do to you?

It wasn't me! We know.

We're just trying to understand who he was.

We've heard so far that he was a pretty nice guy.

Oh, yeah! Right!

But you know that he wasn't?

Uh...

Look, it started so... small.

Just... You know, he'd make little comments.

Then he started hiding my stuff, and then he'd send nasty links.

It sounds so playground,

but those things, they make you feel crazy.

Then it just got worse.

He said I was into little girls.

Obviously, I'm not,

but they searched my computer, for fuck's sake!

I had to explain why I had pictures of my own kids

in the fucking bath! Sorry, mate.

Did the company do anything?

Yeah, yeah, I mean, up to a point.

But that didn't stop him. He...

He'd find me in the car park. He'd come to my house, I mean...

I don't know why I didn't go to the police sooner.

I guess I was just so scared.

I thought I should be able to handle this.

He made me disappear inside myself.

You know, I didn't want to be here.

He was a bully. I know what that feels like.

He bullied you, and you didn't deserve that.

He can't hurt you now.

It's not what Norman asked for, - though, is it? - Oh, come on!

I'm sure your angle about the perfect son would work, too,

but you know which is the better story.

Just cos you didn't find it yourself!

No, it's just... You sure it's the right angle?

Fuck!

Uh...

Sorry, this is really annoying. Can you drop me home real quick?

An estate agent's coming round. Yeah, sure.

Thanks. It's... It's Barstock Road.

Welcome to 1997.

It's very dated!

I know it's not our usual- Hey!

Jesus! Uh...

Rhiannon! You're here.

Yeah! Still... here.

As are you. Seren said you'd be out.

Uh, no. I just... um...

I wanted to, uh... tidy the place.

Why? Big night last night?

No. Not really.

Great. Well...

My colleague, Stella. Gleason.

Condolences on the passing of your father.

But with every cloud...

You know, he's left you a lovely home.

We don't have long. Feel free to leave us to it.

No, it's fine, actually. Uh...

I'll just...

What?

Nothing.

There is so much we could do in here, Stella.

I just know it. She has an eye for fixer-uppers.

Badgerton are thinking of expanding

into interior and lifestyle all because of her.

Stop, Stella, I told you, I can't take it.

Yeah, stop, Stella!

Rhiannon, your hair is looking lovely these days.

I wanted to compliment you before, but... I didn't know.

Didn't want to draw attention to it.

Let's see. Plenty a buyer could do with this space.

Maybe knock it through to the kitchen

and make a second living room.

But first, we should get rid of all this junk.

OK, well, I think that's all.

If you could get everything cleared out and give me a call.

I'll pop by with a photographer.

A lot can be done with Photoshop.

Thank you.

A couple of Glade plug-ins wouldn't hurt.

I've got some hand sanitiser in my bag.

Uh...

Hi, Norman, I have, um- You! In here!

I'm sorry, I...

But I honestly thought that's what you said, Jeff.

I mean, you had a bad signal. It was a crappy line.

But you definitely said, "Go!"

I said, "Go tell Norman."

I didn't hear that.

But we found something. She found something.

And it's good.

Go on, then. Dead man terrorised colleague.

What? Who? Canal guy?

Yeah! And his mum told you that?

Uh... well, no. No.

We did some, uh... investigating.

To see an ex-work colleague. Ah!

Norman, for Christ's sake, this is...

Go on. We've got proof.

You said it needed something else, so...

Mm-mm. I don't think we can use this.

It's too unsavoury. The bloke's a murder victim.

Yeah, but he's a terrible person.

I mean, you should've heard him.

What? Dave Ferris.

His, um... His victim.

The Telegram would publish it.

OK. What?

Jeff will write it up.

It's Jeff's story.

It's his dead body, so to speak.

I-You'll get your credit, too. Calm down.

Notes!

Uh, a few of us are going for pints at The Bell.

Well, not Claudia and Lana. They usually have Prosecco or cider,

depending on the day, and Jeff normally has a G&T.

Uh... OK. Have a nice time. You've probably got plans

but if you don't, maybe you'd like to join us.

Oh! Oh... no, I don't... I don't have plans.

No presh. HR would have you believe that's discrimination.

No! No... No... No presh!

I-I'd like to come.

Well, it's a good opportunity to celebrate, and...

you did, uh... you did well today.

Thank you. Right, you lot, let's do it.

Come on, let's drink some pints and sing some songs.

♪ Forever's gonna start tonight, yes, it is

♪ Forever's gonna start tonight

♪ Once upon a time, I was falling in love...

Is it always like this?

You don't get out much, do you?

Uh, today was impressive.

I need to up my game, clearly.

Oh, yes!

♪ A total eclipse of the heart. ♪

I mean, I approve of all underhand tactics to piss Jeff off.

Thank you! Right, come on, Claudia.

Hey, AJ, all new employees got to do a song.

Oh, no! No, no!

Otherwise, it's a sackable offence! Ha!

Um... what did you do?

Oh, uh... they didn't ask me.

And a pack of El Spano sausage rolls for the best song tonight.

Ooh!

♪ We gotta fight, fight, fight

Hi, can I... ♪ Fight, fight for this love

♪ We gotta fight, fight, fight Hi, excuse me.

♪ Fight, fight for this love

♪ If it's worth having it's worth fighting for

♪ I don't know where we're heading

♪ I'm willing and ready to go

♪ We've been driving so fast... ♪

Hi, excuse me!

Hey! Uh, sorry. What do you want?

Uh, a vodka lemonade and a lager. Thank you.

Hello?

Can I get some service, please?

Chop-chop! Over here. I can hear you.

Good. Try seeing me now. Gimme one second.

Hey, you alright, boss?

Hi.

I'm glad I bumped into you, actually.

Uh, you are?

Yeah! Yeah, I wanna talk to you.

Oh!

Well, I wanna talk to you, too.

Yeah, like, about the business agreement.

Oh!

Right. Uh... yeah. Of course.

What-What did you want to talk about?

Well, just, like, have you read it?

Like, I know it is dry, so no worries if not, but...

That's why I done it in Comic Sans, to try and liven it up-

I haven't read it yet, sorry.

OK, cool. No, that's fine. There's no rush.

Do you know what I mean? Like, in your own time.

Like, whenever you are ready, though, right, trust me,

all you gotta do is sign on the dotted line.

It's all above board, like...

legally binding and all that, so...

Nothing to worry yourself over.

Yeah, I don't know if I can trust you, actually,

with Dad's business.

Anyway, I've got your number.

There you go, love. £9.80, please.

Thanks. Bye.

♪ It must have been love... That was too high

♪ ..But it's over now... ♪ Right, I'm gonna sing.

Ooh!

♪ You held me down, but I got up

♪ Get ready cos I've had enough

♪ I see it all, I see it now

♪ I got the eye of the tiger

♪ A fighter

♪ Dancing through the fire

♪ Cos I am a champion

♪ And you're gonna hear me roar

♪ Louder, louder than a lion

♪ Cos I am a champion

♪ And you're gonna hear me roar

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh

♪ Oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh

♪ Oh-oh... ♪

Can I help?

Sorry, everyone.

Alright, uh... As all of us know,

something evil happened in our community last night.

That poor boy!

Uh, the police wanted to speak to anyone

who might be able to help with their investigation,

so we can help put this monster in prison where he belongs, eh?

Yes! Look out for one another, yeah? Yeah!

Bit of Blue. One Love.

♪ One love for the mother's pride

♪ One love for the times we've cried

♪ One love, gotta stay alive... ♪

You stupid bitch! You are so fucked!

You are so fucking...

He was a fucking cunt!

Hello? What do you want, Mike?

A pint of lager.

And a friendly smile while you're at it.

Think you can manage that?

Come on! Chop-chop!

Come on!

Oi! Chop-chop! I'm talking to you!

Hey! Come on!

Sorry, my dad... Chop-chop! Come on!

I'm not thirsty anymore.

Cunt!

I'm heading off. Oh, OK.

See you tomorrow.

Hey!

Be careful getting home, eh?

Just until we nail this guy.

Of course.

I hope you get him.

Yeah.

♪ Like the old man and the little boy... ♪

Joan, don't be retarded.

I would never have said that.

Well, they're clearly liars.

Well, obviously they're lying.

Look, I'm not a bloody charity.

Get her out or you lose your job.

Fuck's sake!

Ugh! Hi! Excuse me!

Um... Can you help me?

Thanks. What's going on?

I've lost my dog. I-I think she went in here.

I... I don't know where she is. She's so small.

Should be on a lead in a place like this.

I think she went under here, but I can't move the bin.

Can you... Can you have a look?

Oh! Jesus!

Ugh!

Fucking joke!

What's his name?

♪ BILLIE EILISH: You Should See Me In A Crown ♪

♪ Bite my tongue, bide my time

♪ Wearing a warning sign

♪ Wait till the world is mine

♪ Visions I vandalise

♪ Cold in my kingdom size

♪ Fell for these ocean eyes 'People I'd love to kill.'

♪ You should see me in a crown

♪ I'm gonna run this nothing town

♪ Watch me make 'em bow one by one by one

♪ One by one by

♪ You should see me in a crown

♪ Your silence is my favourite sound

♪ Watch me make 'em bow one by one by one

♪ One by one by one

♪ Crown

♪ I'm gonna run this nothing town

♪ Watch me make 'em bow one by one by one

♪ One by one by

♪ You should see me in a crown

♪ You should see me, see me

♪ Your silence is my favourite sound

♪ You should see me, see me

♪ Watch me make 'em bow one by one by one

♪ One by one by one. ♪

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