Original subtitles

Hey, sleepy heads.

You just love being in bed with me.

What a night, huh?

Uneventful, really.

You know I'm so used to my place being trashed

after a party, but it's so clean out there.

Was that your mom?

Legends has it she was vacuuming at my bris.

Well, I made coffee, recycled beans,

save our whooping cranes.

And Nate, I'm so sorry about your soup,

but I want you to know I tried it anyway

because I am a good friend like that.

Wow, that's really nice of--

It was so bad.

So, so bad.

Like you cooked it in an old diaper genie,

left it outside for a couple of days,

spilled it on the subway,

kind of scraped it back in there.

Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you, Blaine.

I'm also making breakfast if you guys want any.

Great, why don't you go finish that?

Recycled eggs.

We've all got to do our part.

Did you ever hear from them?

Who?

Yeah.

Yes, Aaron texted me, and they couldn't make it.

I'm sorry.

For what?

It was a great party.

When I was talking to that guy--

You mean Walker?

You know him?

Lacy said that Matilda heard

that Jonno told Tyler that Isabelle saw

that Walker favorited your tweet,

so yes, I basically know him.

Okay, well,

I know it looked like--

He's not hot, so

it makes sense you'd hit it off.

What does that mean?

He's a journalist, he has 400 followers,

but he's verified, you know the type.

What'd you do, a background check?

Yeah.

I read his stuff too.

He uses too many commas.

Okay.

Well, Blaine made breakfast, so why don't we--

Do you like him?

Blaine?

Walker.

Do you like him?

Because I don't judge.

I mean, people can't help how they feel.

Luke, why don't you just join me in the kitchen

and drink some coffee and eat some recycled eggs

because I don't think this is funny.

You set four places?

Yeah, someone got lucky last night?

Nope, Nate and I did not have sex.

Couldn't find him.

I'm right here.

Roomies,

I found myself a lady.

You dog!

Wait, is that what straight people say?

You're asking the wrong--

Yeah, I saw you two together last night.

You were really hitting it off.

Yeah, I was going to ask her to join us, but--

You just missed her.

She's already gone.

Yes, Blaine, we know, and we believe you.

No, she's here.

I'm sure.

I just wanted to make sure it was cool with you, Luke.

Oh my God, did I tell you, or did I tell you?

You can stop trying to make me feel jealous, Blaine.

It's cute, but at this point,

it's getting a little ridiculous.

Is it a good time for me to come out?

Mom?

I slept over.

All night.

Where's the girl?

This is the girl.

She's the girl.

I'm a woman.

Let's sit down.

Don't tell me what to do.

You did say that you don't judge

and that people can't help how they feel.

Not that I'm saying, but you did say.

I don't know.

Seat's cold.

You see, I'm not wearing any pants.

I have some sweatpants in my room, if you'd like me to--

Oh no, no.

I like it.

More coffee, champ?

I'll kill you in your sleep.

Luke.

Stop it.

You don't know Blaine like I do.

In fact, I was just learning about his father

and his military upbringing.

It reminded me of Walter and how he passed.

Dad died of cancerous moles.

Yes, but he was militant about not getting them checked.

All right, well I think I'm going to head out.

Sit. Down.

Luke, I want you to know,

your mom is

unbelievable.

And flexible. After all these years.

That's right, baby.

Fun story.

I started out as a modern dancer,

but I switched to visual art

after I accidentally punctured

poor Susie Greenberg with my brooch.

They said, "Lenora, you cannot dance in a brooch,"

to which I replied, "Then watch me paint."

And the rest...

Jesus fucking Christ.

Is my-story.

Our souls just found each other.

It was right after I tried your soup,

and I threw it up in the tub,

and Lenora brought me a glass of water.

She's amazing.

I expect you two to be happy for me

now that I've found love.

Love?!

I keep shouting it, too!

Luke, do not deny me this.

Most men are just jealous of my early water colors,

but not Blaine.

He sees me as I see this.

As a series of

five...

No.

Six.

No.

Seven etchings.

That's right.

I am reclaiming my womanhood.

Hear me roar.

And if I don't have your support,

I will forge ahead without you, I will,

because you are looking at the woman

AM New York called "Also With."

so champion me or move out.

This is my apartment.

Oh yes, that's right.

But if she moves in, we could split the rent four ways.

I'm not living with my mom.

And I'm not living with Nate.

Wait, what?

We don't have to decide today.

You fuck my mom?

Yeah.

You fuck my mom?!

Luke!

Blaine, beloved.

Why don't we stop by the farmer's market

like we discussed?

Fresh strawberries

and a seasonal sale on wicker baskets.

We should try and beat the rush.

That's a good idea.

We both love baskets.

Tequila

at 11 AM.

Okay.

Man,

what a shame Aaron and Rusty didn't show.

With my mom and Blaine, you and Walker, Tyler,

because why not?

We could've had a very confusing orgy.

I know you're upset.

Actually, not upset.

Things are finally starting to make sense.

And you know what? You should go out with him.

Who?

Walker.

Because you're right.

I don't judge.

Aren't we exclusive?

You like him, don't you?

What?

I haven't hooked up with anyone,

and trust, I get offers daily.

Check my DMs.

Actually, no, don't.

Okay.

I mean, I want to hook up with people all the time.

Maybe I should. Maybe you should.

Because people can't help how they feel,

and my roommate just fucked my mom,

so let's all just relax, shall we?

So what? Now you want an open relationship?

What do you want?

When I did that background check, I got his number, too.

What am I supposed to do with this?

Call him.

Hello?

Hi, is this Walker?

Yeah.

Hi, this is Nate from last night.

Hey! Hi.

Hey. I got your number

from my friend who has your number.

I should have texted.

That's okay.

No, I'm skipping steps.

I'm glad you called.

How was the rest of the party?

It was louder than I intended it to be.

Ah, I hear you.

Or actually I don't hear you

because last night was too loud.

Oh, he's got jokes.

He's got jokes.

So yeah, I left shortly after we talked.

Yeah, another event or--

No, it was just...

Everyone was doing photoshoots all night.

Oh, what? Why? That's so weird.

Who would want that?

Right? And that guy even took our picture.

Well, I can get us copies if you want.

Like doubles?

Remember when we used to get doubles?

Yep. Yeah, I do.

Yeah. Call up CVS. I want doubles.

Okay. Okay.

I was wondering,

would you want to go out sometime?

Really?

Like as a--

But first I should thank you for coming to the party,

the party that I threw

with my boyfriend,

and we are

open,

and we find Tyler energetic but difficult.

Wow.

Yeah, okay, look,

I did not mean to mislead you or throw you for a loop

or lie to you, and if you didn't want to go out with me,

honestly, I would not even blame you, no judgment,

because people cannot help how they feel.

Okay.

Okay?

Okay, I'll go out with you.

I'll have to adjust my expectations,

but maybe we could get some...

Matzo Ball soup?

I didn't say it. I was careful.

No, you're great.

Okay.

Okay.