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1
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I never should have let you stay here.
2
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Yeah, well, I'm gone in a week.
3
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I want you out in the morning.
4
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Fuck!
5
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He doesn't hate you!
6
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He's just intimidated by you and he's a monster like in a very casual way.
7
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It's been a really good week without him, and I have gotten a lot of work done...
8
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I don't even care what he's been up to but what do you think he's been up to?
9
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No! Aaron, I don't have feelings for him. That's-
10
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That's ridiculous!
11
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Yeah! I mean, Luke is handsome if you're the kind of person who likes symmetry,
12
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but, hello, we live in Los Angeles.
13
00:02:02,756 --> 00:02:04,796
Oh - um...
14
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He's, um, calling me right now. Should I, uh...
15
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Okay, um, okay, I'm gonna call you back.
16
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Hello?
17
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Hiiii...
18
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- So I think I left my razors at your place.
- I'm sorry for the way things escalated... Oh.
19
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I can swing by in about a half hour, pick them up?
20
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Okay. Sure.
21
00:02:44,078 --> 00:02:46,718
- Yo.
- It was open.
22
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Look, I'm not proud of how I acted.
23
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In front of everyone. That was...
24
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Well, it just came spilling out and it was like this freight train,
25
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I couldn't even stop it.
26
00:03:03,346 --> 00:03:05,386
Oh! Sure. Sure.
27
00:03:05,959 --> 00:03:08,215
I really hate that I told you to leave, but you know,
28
00:03:08,215 --> 00:03:10,235
you and I both know this was not working.
29
00:03:10,842 --> 00:03:14,632
At first it was all retweets and Jessica Jones.
30
00:03:14,632 --> 00:03:17,514
But then I meet Aaron, who's, you know, like, just the greatest, and,
31
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okay, like, before our first date, you were telling me,
32
00:03:19,944 --> 00:03:21,726
do you remember this? You were kind of helping me?
33
00:03:21,726 --> 00:03:23,186
You remember that? That was really fun.
34
00:03:23,375 --> 00:03:25,215
And Aaron keeps asking me,
35
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"Why does Luke despise me? Did I do something?" And I'm like,
36
00:03:28,173 --> 00:03:31,483
"he doesn't despise you, he will follow you back eventually, trust me."
37
00:03:31,665 --> 00:03:35,455
But you, of all people, know my success rate with guys, so why wouldn't you root for this?
38
00:03:35,455 --> 00:03:39,421
Aaron is like, a ten. And I'm like a Midwestern six, seven at best.
39
00:03:39,421 --> 00:03:41,201
And it's like this big moment for me,
40
00:03:41,201 --> 00:03:46,342
like, I can't tell why he even likes me, like why is he even attracted to me? It's actually crazy and I do not understand it.
41
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And all I wanna do is celebrate this with you, my best friend,
42
00:03:49,695 --> 00:03:51,706
but all you wanna do is shit on it.
43
00:03:51,706 --> 00:03:54,646
And how many guys come over here, and I just let it happen
44
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in my bed, and make you huevos rancheros
45
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while I watch you stick your tongue down someone's throat who you're never even gonna see again,
46
00:04:00,735 --> 00:04:02,655
and look, I don't judge. Look at me. I don't judge!
47
00:04:02,655 --> 00:04:07,350
But it just feels like, and please, you gotta just stop me if I'm totally off-base here, but it feels like...
48
00:04:07,350 --> 00:04:11,877
Aaron and I, we have this connection, and then maybe you...
49
00:04:12,956 --> 00:04:15,837
Or... not! I don't know!
50
00:04:15,837 --> 00:04:17,767
But you gotta tell me!
51
00:04:17,964 --> 00:04:22,056
You never want to talk about anything serious, you make fun of me every time I do,
52
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and then cut to us screaming at each other in front of all of our friends and ruining a perfectly good round of Mafia, it's insane!
53
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If you care about this friendship, then you will just talk to me.
54
00:04:33,421 --> 00:04:35,894
I shouldn't have to choose between my boyfriend and my best friend!
55
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It's not fair, so please don't make me!
56
00:04:38,028 --> 00:04:41,658
This, this has gotten so out of hand, and
57
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I know that I've pissed you off here and there,
58
00:04:44,247 --> 00:04:46,980
and I know that I'm a lot to handle,
59
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but you are a lot too!
60
00:04:50,915 --> 00:04:52,425
And I miss you!
61
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A lot.
62
00:05:03,355 --> 00:05:04,745
Say it again.
63
00:05:05,755 --> 00:05:06,945
I miss you so mu--
64
00:06:13,862 --> 00:06:16,839
- Does this-
- I bought you Twitter followers last night.
65
00:06:16,839 --> 00:06:19,571
You... What did you do?
66
00:06:19,571 --> 00:06:21,541
Well I knew you wanted more.
67
00:06:21,541 --> 00:06:24,294
So I bought you like fifteen thousand Twitter followers.
68
00:06:24,294 --> 00:06:26,364
On a website. You can do that.
69
00:06:26,364 --> 00:06:28,040
Umm... that's not-
70
00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:30,410
Now you have a bunch. I just thought...
71
00:06:31,870 --> 00:06:33,810
- Okay...
- 'Cause you had said that...
72
00:06:35,946 --> 00:06:39,406
Am I breaking up with Aaron? I mean-
73
00:06:39,406 --> 00:06:41,151
It was sort of a goodbye gift.
74
00:06:41,151 --> 00:06:43,591
No, no listen, we can...
75
00:06:44,750 --> 00:06:46,240
...If you want.
76
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:49,090
I'm getting transferred. My job.
77
00:06:49,460 --> 00:06:51,002
What does that mean?
78
00:06:51,002 --> 00:06:53,270
I'm moving to New York.
79
00:06:56,509 --> 00:06:57,759
Wait, what?!
6522
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