Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.MX

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

CHUCK: I DIDN'T FEEL GOOD OR PROUD OF THE JOURNEY

THAT HAROLD AND I WERE STARTING ON,

BUT I SAW NO ALTERNATIVE.

THIS WAS OUR WAY OUT.

AND AS BEST AS I COULD FIGURE,

IT WAS OUR ONLY WAY OUT.

GRANTED, IT WAS A DRASTIC STEP,

BUT SOMETIMES DRASTIC CIRCUMSTANCES

CALL FOR DRASTIC MEASURES. IN OTHER WORDS,

SOMETIMES YOU GOT TO STICK YOUR NECK OUT.

OF COURSE, IF THINGS DIDN'T WORK OUT...

WELL, I WAS WILLING TO SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES.

I MEAN, I'D PREFER NOT TO, BUT I FIGURE

THAT'S JUST PART OF THE GAME.

IF YOU'RE GONNA PUT YOUR BUTT OUT ON THE LINE,

CHANCES ARE YOUR BUTT'S GONNA GET BIT OFF.

HOW YOU FEELING?

PR-PRETTY GOOD.

NO, I MEAN, HOW YOU FEELING?

OHH...

I'M TRYING NOT TO THINK ABOUT IT.

SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE DOING A PRETTY GOOD JOB.

(SIGHS)

WOULD YOU GIVE ME THOSE

BEFORE YOU GET THEM ALL MESSED UP?

GIMME 'EM. COME ON!

I'M JUST A LITTLE NERVOUS, OK?

WELL, THEN, YOU GOT THE RIGHT FEELING.

THAT SIGN OUGHT TO SAY

"IN THE MIDDLE OF FRIGGING NOWHERE."

(CHUCKLING)

MIDDLE OF FRIGGING NOWHERE. THAT WOULD BE PRETTY FUNNY.

YEAH.

LISTEN, IF SOMETHING GOES WRONG,

YOU TAKE CARE OF YOUR OWN SELF.

CHUCK-- OK, MAN.

YOU'RE GOING TO COVER YOURSELF.

CHUCK, YOU SAID...

NOTHING COULD GO WRONG.

I SAID CHANCES ARE

NOTHING WILL GO WRONG, HAROLD...

BUT YOU NEVER KNOW.

YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED.

THAT RIGHT THERE WILL BE OUR PHRASE FOR THE DAY.

CHUCK, REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE LITTLE KIDS,

THE RADIO, THE GUY ON THE RADIO

WOULD SAY, LIKE, TODAY'S COLOR IS, LIKE, PURPLE,

OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT?

TRYING TO GET READY TO GO TO SCHOOL,

AND YOU DIDN'T HAVE NOTHING PURPLE TO WEAR,

SO YOU'D HAVE TO GO TEARING THROUGH THE HOUSE

LOOKING FOR SOMETHING PURPLE, LIKE A PURPLE SHIRT--

HAROLD, LET'S NOT WORRY ABOUT THAT RIGHT NOW.

I'M SORRY.

THESE CARDS ARE ALL MESSED UP.

ALL RIGHT, SO FAR SO GOOD.

NOW, REMEMBER:

SOMETHING GOES WRONG, GET THE CAR

BACK TO THE HANGAR, STRIP IT DOWN,

ALL RIGHT? YOU KNOW THE DRILL.

WE'VE GONE OVER IT ABOUT A THOUSAND TIMES.

YEAH. WONDER WHY I'M STILL WORRIED

THAT ONE OF US MIGHT FORGET SOMETHING.

HAROLD, DON'T BE PLAYING WITH THAT,

ALL RIGHT? PUT IT IN YOUR POCKET.

THAT THING ONLY COMES OUT

IF ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY, ALL RIGHT?

I'D STILL FEEL A LITTLE BETTER

IF MAYBE I HAD SOME BULLETS.

HAROLD, BULLETS AND A GUN

ARE POTENTIALLY A DANGEROUS COMBINATION.

THAT'S HOW PEOPLE GET KILLED.

ALL RIGHT?

NOW, HAROLD...

WE DON'T WANT NO KILLING, DO WE?

NO.

SO NEGATORY ON THE BULLETS?

UH..."H-HURRY UP"?

(TELEPHONE RINGS)

"GIVE ME ALL OF YOUR MONEY."

"HURRY UP." HA HA!

OH...

DO YOU WANT ME TO TAKE YOU TO THE VAULT?

(RING)

OH!

TELLER: AAH!

AAH!

OH, MY GOD.

LOOK AT ALL THIS MONEY!

WELL, PUT IT IN!

OK. ALL RIGHT.

WHOO...

ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY ON THE FLOOR!

THEY'RE ON THE FLOOR.

WHAT'S EVERYBODY DOING ON THE FLOOR?

THE BANK'S BEING ROBBED.

THE BANK'S BEING ROBBED?

YEAH.

BY WHO?

HIM AND HIS PARTNER!

YOU ROBBING THE BANK?

UH...

UH, YEAH.

WELL, GUESS WHAT. SO AM I.

WELL...WELL, WE WERE HERE FIRST.

I DON'T BELIEVE THIS STUFF!

OH, CATERPILLARS...

THEY WANT TO ROB THE BANK, TOO.

YEAH, THE STOCKINGS ARE A DEAD GIVEAWAY.

TELL YOU WHAT.

I'LL MAKE THIS REAL SIMPLE.

YOU HAND OVER THE MONEY,

AND I'LL FORGET I EVER SEEN YOU.

HA! I AIN'T HANDING OVER NO MONEY.

(LAUGHS)

HE AIN'T HANDING OVER THE MONEY.

I WANT THE MONEY!

FREEZE!

NO!

(PEOPLE SCREAMING)

(ALARM GOES OFF)

AWW...

AAH!

(APPROACHING SIRENS)

OH, NO.

AAH!

DAMN IT!

MESSED THE PLACE UP PRETTY GOOD, DIDN'T THEY, TAMMY KAY?

YES, SIR.

(KNOCKING)

WHAT'S THAT?

SOUNDS LIKE SOMEBODY KNOCKIN' AT THE DOOR.

WHICH DOOR?

(KNOCKING)

OH!

I THINK IT'S THE BATHROOM.

(KNOCKING)

ANYBODY IN THERE?

CHUCK: YEAH...

WHO ARE YOU?

CHUCK BETTS.

I WAS GOING TO THE BATHROOM

AND THEN...I HEARD ALL THIS COMMOTION OUTSIDE

AND THEN...WELL,

WHEN I TRIED TO GET OUT, THE DOOR,

IT JAMMED UP ON ME.

YOU ALL RIGHT IN THERE?

NO. I'VE BEEN WOUNDED.

IT WON'T OPEN. I ALREADY TRIED.

IT'S JAMMED.

ALL RIGHT, YOU JUST HANG ON.

I'LL GET SOMEBODY TO HELP YOU.

YOU BETTER COME ON OUT OF THERE, SON.

YOU LOOK WHITE AS A SHEET.

I PEEKED OUT THE WINDOW BACK THERE.

I SAW THEM JUMPING INTO AN OLD CHEVY.

I BELIEVE IT WAS A CAMARO.

WERE THEY STILL WEARING THEIR MASKS?

NO, SIR. THEY TOOK THEM OFF.

YOU GET A GOOD LOOK?

YES, SIR, I DID.

THEY WERE, UH...

2 BALD GUYS...

APPROXIMATELY 50 YEARS OF AGE,

AND ONE OF THEM EVEN HAD A HANDLEBAR MUSTACHE,

THE KIND THAT WHIPS AND CURLS AROUND--

AMBULANCE IS HERE.

ALL RIGHT.

I'M GOING TO NEED TO TALK TO YOU

SOME MORE LATER, SON.

WHY DON'T YOU GO GET PATCHED UP?

ALL RIGHT.

THANKS.

CHUCK: WHEN YOU GO TO ROB A BANK,

YOU THINK THINGS MIGHT GET OUT OF HAND,

MIGHT GET A LITTLE CRAZY,

BUT 2 GUYS COMING AND ROBBING THE SAME BANK

AT THE SAME TIME YOU ARE

AND THEN GET STUCK IN THE TOILET...

NOW, THAT'S ONE SITUATION I NEVER EVEN DREAMED OF.

AND THEN WHEN IT SEEMED LIKE ALL THE WEIRD STUFF

THAT COULD HAPPEN, HAPPENED,

SOMETHING EVEN WEIRDER HAPPENED...

EXCEPT THIS WAS A GOOD WEIRD.

HI.

HEY.

YOU KNOW, I THINK YOU'VE GOT A LITTLE FEVER.

I BELIEVE I DO.

YOUR BODY'S PROBABLY JUST GOING THROUGH A LITTLE SHOCK.

YEAH, I GUESS.

BUT THAT'S NORMAL.

IT'S NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.

WE'RE READY FOR THIS ONE.

CHUCK: THERE'S GOOD-LOOKING, AND THERE'S GOOD-LOOKING,

BUT THIS GIRL DRIFTED OFF AT A WHOLE DIFFERENT CATEGORY.

SHE WAS THE KIND OF GORGEOUS

THAT MADE YOU HALF HOPE SHE'D IGNORE YOU.

THAT WAY YOU COULD SAVE YOURSELF

THE TERRIBLE TROUBLE OF FALLING DESPERATELY IN LOVE.

'CAUSE LET'S FACE IT: WITH A GIRL LIKE THAT,

YOU DON'T BELIEVE SHE'D LOVE YOU AS MUCH AS YOU'D LOVE HER.

I MEAN, WHAT ARE THE CHANCES OF THAT HAPPENING?

I FOUND OUT LATER THAT HER NAME WAS LAYLA,

AND THERE WASN'T MUCH DOUBT

THAT SHE COULD MAKE ME BEG, "DARLING, PLEASE."

YEAH, I CAN VERIFY THE CAPRI.

OH, NO, I DIDN'T SEE HIS FACE.

I DON'T KNOW. MAYBE THE OTHER GUY

DUCKED DOWN THE BACK SEAT OR TOOK OFF ON FOOT

OR IN ANOTHER VEHICLE.

LISTEN, I GOT TO GO. I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER.

ALL RIGHT, BYE.

HOW WE FEELING?

I'M--I'M DOIN' BETTER, THANKS.

YEAH? YEAH.

I GOT HIM.

WHY, I'M GLAD.

LISTEN, DO YOU WANT ME TO TAKE YOU BACK TO TOWN

SO YOU CAN GET YOUR CAR?

I'M NOT SURE I CAN DRIVE IN THIS CONDITION.

I GOT A BUDDY WHO'LL BE GLAD TO GO PICK UP MY CAR.

OH. I GUESS YOU'D JUST AS SOON GO HOME, HUH?

YEAH, I WOULD.

OK. YOU NEED A LIFT?

YEAH.

SO I GOT ASSIGNED TO INFERNO

RIGHT OUT OF THE POLICE ACADEMY.

I'VE BEEN HERE ABOUT 3 MONTHS.

GOT ASSIGNED TO INFERNO.

YEAH. BELIEVE ME,

THERE WEREN'T A LOT OF HANDS IN THE AIR

WHEN THEY WERE ASKING FOR VOLUNTEERS.

YEAH, I'LL BET.

BUT BEING THAT I'M FROM EL PASO,

THEY DECIDED TO SEND ME.

I THINK IT HAD MORE TO DO WITH BEING A WOMAN

IN A ROOMFUL OF MEN WHO DIDN'T WANT TO GO.

THAT'S A PRETTY SORRY DEAL.

YEAH. I TELL YOU ONE THING--

I'VE WATCHED MORE WHEEL OF FORTUNE

THAN I EVER THOUGHT WAS POSSIBLE.

DO YOU EVER NOTICE HOW SKINNY VANNA WHITE'S LEGS ARE?

YES! I WAS JUST GETTING READY TO SAY THAT!

NO! YES, I WAS.

IT WAS ON THE TIP OF MY TONGUE.

TOP HALF, BIG AND FULL...

AND THEN SHE'S GOT THESE SKINNY LITTLE LEGS.

THAT'S RIGHT.

AND DOES PAT SAJAK REMIND YOU OF A KID

YOU WOULD'VE GIVEN A LOT OF GRIEF TO IN GYM CLASS?

WELL...YEAH, BUT HE'S KINDA CUTE.

BUT HE'S KIND OF A NERD AT THE SAME TIME,

LIKE IF HE ASKED YOU OUT,

YOU'D THINK ABOUT IT A FEW SECONDS

BUT THEN SAY YOU HAD OTHER PLANS.

RIGHT. OH, UH... TAKE A LEFT UP THERE.

OK.

AHH...

WELL...

THEY TOLD YOU HOW TO CHANGE THAT DRESSING AND ALL?

YEAH.

GOOD. 'CAUSE, IT'S IMPORTANT TO KEEP IT CLEAN.

THIS WEATHER'S JUST A BREEDING GROUND FOR BACTERIA.

YEAH. THEY GAVE ME A LOT OF OINTMENT AND STUFF.

GOOD. BE SURE TO EAT RIGHT.

YOU KNOW, YOU LOST A LITTLE BLOOD.

YOU NEED TO EAT, AND BUILD EVERYTHING BACK UP.

YEAH. I GOT PLENTY OF FOOD.

WELL, THANKS AGAIN.

SURE.

YOU WANT TO HEAR SOMETHING FUNNY, KIND OF GOOFY?

SURE.

WELL...

I WAS IN THAT HOSPITAL,

RIGHT?

THIS IS STRANGE FOR ME TO BE SAYING.

OH, NO. GO AHEAD. I PROBABLY WON'T THINK IT'S STRANGE.

YOU SURE? I--I'M SURE.

OK.

WELL, I WAS ON THAT STRETCHER,

AND I HAD MY EYES CLOSED.

AND WHEN I OPENED UP MY EYES,

I SWEAR TO GOD!

I LOOKED UP AT YOU...

AND I THOUGHT I WAS LOOKING AT SOME KIND OF AN ANGEL.

I KNOW IT'S SILLY FOR ME TO SAY,

BUT HEY, THAT'S JUST WHAT I THOUGHT.

I THOUGHT I WAS LOOKING AT AN ANGEL FACE.

WELL, THANK YOU.

SEE YOU.

BYE.

CHUCK: I'M NOT SOME ROMEO GUY

WITH A WHOLE BUNCH OF SMOOTH LINES,

AND I'D NEVER SAY ANYTHING LIKE "ANGEL FACE"

TO ANYONE IN MY WHOLE LIFE,

BUT I MEANT IT.

EVEN IF IT DID SOUND DUMB AS HELL,

I MEANT WHAT I SAID ABOUT LAYLA'S ANGEL FACE...

AND I WAS JUST PRAYING

THAT SHE DIDN'T THINK I WAS A GOOF FOR SAYING SO.

WHAT A DAY.

(WHISPERING) Chuck!

YOU SCARED ME TO DEATH!

I'M SORRY.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING, SNEAKING AROUND LIKE THAT?

I SAW YOU PULL UP IN A POLICE CAR,

AND I THOUGHT THE JIG WAS UP.

I HAD TO HIDE.

WELL, THE JIG AIN'T UP.

IT WAS DAMN NEAR UP. COULD BE UP AGAIN.

BUT IT AIN'T UP NOW?

NO, IT AIN'T UP NOW.

NOT FOR THE MOMENT, ANYWAYS.

WHERE'S THE CAR?

I STRIPPED IT. IT'S AT THE HANGAR.

DAMN, HAROLD. THAT'S FAST WORK.

WELL, MY POWER WRENCH IS REAL QUICK.

I GOT NEW BATTERIES.

SO YOU DROVE THE PICKUP OVER HERE?

YEAH. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR ARM?

I GOT SHOT.

BULLET CAME THROUGH THE BATHROOM DOOR,

WHICH IS WHERE I WAS...HIDING.

NOW YOU CAN TELL PEOPLE

THAT YOU'VE BEEN SHOT DURING A HOLDUP.

I DON'T THINK I'LL BE BRAGGING ABOUT THAT

ANYTIME SOON.

OK.

WHY DIDN'T THEY ARREST YOU?

I TOLD THEM I WAS A CUSTOMER...

IN THERE USING THE BATHROOM.

IT'S A GOOD THING YOU WEREN'T...

IN THE BROOM CLOSET.

YEAH. NOW, THAT'S A GOOD THING.

OH, NO QUESTION ABOUT IT.

NO QUESTION AT ALL.

ALL 4 MEN WERE WORKING TOGETHER ON THIS ONE.

YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN OF THAT?

WELL, I'D STAKE MY REPUTATION ON IT.

THE ODDS OF 2 SETS OF BANK ROBBERS

HITTING FIRST INFERNO ON THE SAME DAY

AT, UH, EXACTLY THE SAME TIME

HAVE TO BE ABOUT A ZILLION TO ONE.

WELL, YES, BUT THE TELLER SAID--

THEY'S CAME IN 2 DIFFERENT AUTOMOBILES...

THUS DOUBLING THEIR CHANCES OF GETTING AWAY

AND, UH...SIMULTANEOUSLY CREATING A GREAT DEAL

OF CHAOS AND CONFUSION.

WELL, THAT SEEMS TO HAVE WORKED.

NOW, DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT THAT.

WE'LL, UH...WE'LL BE CATCHING THESE BOYS

IN SHORT ORDER.

ALL RIGHT. WELL, THANK YOU, SHERIFF.

THANK YOU.

TV NEWSWOMAN: 4 MEN WORKING IN 2 PAIRS

ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE ROBBERY.

IT IS REPORTED THAT THEY'VE GOTTEN AWAY

WITH OVER $100,000.

NOW, WE UNDERSTAND THAT WITNESSES

HAVE GOTTEN THE DETAILED DESCRIPTION

OF BOTH GETAWAY CARS AND THEIR LICENSE PLATE NUMBERS.

UH, THAT IS CORRECT.

WE, UH, HAVE DETAILED DESCRIPTIONS

OF BOTH CARS AND LICENSE PLATE NUMBERS,

AND I CAN ASSURE YOU IT WON'T BE LONG

UNTIL THESE MEN ARE BROUGHT TO JUSTICE.

NOW, ARE THERE ANY--

$100,000!

MY EYE!

I'M TELLING YOU, HAROLD,

THERE WAS SOME MAJOR CASH JUST SITTING THERE.

WELL, I THOUGHT YOU SAID IT WOULD ONLY TAKE ABOUT...

$80,000 TO GET OUR PLANE UP AND RUNNING.

YEAH, WELL, UH,

IN MY LIMITED BANK-ROBBING EXPERIENCE,

I FOUND THAT YOU DON'T ASK FOR WHAT YOU NEED.

YOU TAKE WHATEVER THEY GOT.

AND THERE WAS LIKE...A MILLION,

MAYBE $2 MILLION.

IT WAS JUST SITTING THERE.

WELL, THE MORE THE MERRIER, AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED.

IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT,

YOU REALIZE IT AIN'T SO GREAT.

IT AIN'T?

A COUPLE OF MILLION DOLLARS IN FIRST INFERNO?

YEAH.

THAT DON'T ADD UP.

THERE AIN'T THAT MUCH MONEY

IN THIS PART OF THE STATE,

LET ALONE, WHAT? FIRST INFERNO?

SO WHAT DOES THAT TELL YOU?

TELLS ME, HEY,

WE HIT THE MOTHER LODE!

NO, WE DIDN'T HIT THE MOTHER LODE.

WE HIT A PILE OF DIRTY MONEY.

DIRTY MONEY!

DO YOU KNOW WHAT KIND OF GUYS LOOK FOR DIRTY MONEY?

DIRTY...PEOPLE?

YEAH. DIRTY GUYS.

NOW, HERE'S THE IRONY OF IT ALL, THOUGH, HAROLD.

SEE, MY BAD LUCK BEING STUCK IN THAT TOILET?

THAT ACTUALLY TURNED OUT TO BE MY GOOD LUCK,

'CAUSE THE MONEY MAY BE DIRTY, BUT IT'S SAFE.

HOW'S THAT?

WHO WOULD THINK SOMEONE WOULD ROB A BANK,

TURN AROUND, HIDE THE MONEY IN THE SAME BANK?

THAT'S THE LAST PLACE THEY'D LOOK!

YEAH.

NOW, THAT'S WHAT I CALL IRONIC.

UH-HUH.

THERE'S SOME BAD NEWS, HOWEVER.

THERE IS?

THE MONEY'S SO DAMN SAFE, I'M NOT SURE HOW WE'RE GOING TO GET IT.

HEY...

WE COULD RE-ROB THE BANK!

NO.

ONCE IS ENOUGH FOR ME.

MY BANK-ROBBING DAYS ARE BEHIND ME.

OH, GOOD.

WELL...

YOU'LL THINK OF SOMETHING.

YOU ALWAYS DO.

I DON'T BELIEVE IT!

THEY GOT IT ALL?

'FRAID SO. CLEAN SWEEP.

HUH! THEM BANDITS ARE SOMEWHERE,

COUNTING THEIR MONEY AND HAVING A GOOD GIGGLE!

THEY PROBABLY FIGURED TO CLEAR 100,000, MAYBE.

HO HO HO. WELL...

GET HOME WITH THEIR GOODY BAG,

AND WHAT DO YOU KNOW?

TRICK OR TREAT TO THE TUNE OF $3 MILLION, DAMN IT!

SHERIFF GIBSON SAID HE WOULD FIND THE MONEY.

IT WOULD TAKE GIBSON 2 HANDS

TO FIND HIS BUTT!

AND IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT, DIRT WAD,

LET'S SAY HE DOES FIND IT.

WHAT DOES HE FIND?

HE FINDS $3 MILLION!

THEN...WHOSE TAIL IS IN THE WRINGER, HUH?

WHOSE BUTT IS HANGING OUT THERE

IN THE BREEZE?

I...DON'T KNOW.

YOURS, STUPID!

(WHISPERING) THE FEDS WILL BE DOWN HERE

IN HALF A HEARTBEAT,

AND THEY'LL START ASKING YOU A FEW QUESTIONS,

AND YOU'LL JUST HAVE TO EXPLAIN TO THEM

THAT YOU'VE BEEN LAUNDERING A LITTLE CASH.

YES, SIR!

AND DON'T BOTHER TO MENTION MY NAME,

BECAUSE I AM CLEAN AS A WHISTLE.

I DIDN'T TOUCH NO MONEY!

YOU THINK THE FEDS WILL BE DOWN HERE?

NO.

NO. IF THERE IS A...

A GOOD AND LOVING GOD, I WILL FIND THE MONEY

BEFORE GIBSON GETS HIS FINGER OUT OF HIS NOSE,

AND WHEN I DO FIND IT... I'M GOING TO TAKE

THE SNAKES WHO DID THIS TO ME,

PUT THEIR HEADS ON THE CHOPPING BLOCK...

AND THEN, JUST LIKE A FRIGGING CHICKEN...

SOMETHING JUST DAWNED ON ME.

WHAT'S THAT?

WHO KNEW I WAS RUNNIN' MONEY THROUGH HERE?

ME AND YOU!

NO.

YOU'RE NOT SMART ENOUGH TO ROB YOUR OWN BANK

AND PUT IN $100,000 IN INSURANCE CLAIMS

AND KEEP MY 3 MIL

FOR YOUR OWN...

NO.

NO.

YOU'RE NOT.

BECAUSE IF YOU DID

AND I FIND OUT ABOUT IT,

I'D GUT YOU LIKE A JACKRABBIT

FROM YOUR TOES TO YOUR NOSTRILS!

NO. MM-MMM.

YOU DO NOT HAVE THE NUGGETS FOR THAT.

I'LL FIND OUT WHO DID IT...

AND WHEN I DO,

THERE'S GOING TO BE HELL TO PAY.

(DOOR CLOSES)

OH...

(CRICKETS CHIRPING)

I DON'T BELIEVE THIS. I'M GONNA END UP

EATING A PICKLE AND A MAYO SANDWICH.

(CAR HORN HONKS)

OH, MAN.

YES!

YES.

YES.

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

ONE SECOND, PLEASE!

(TOILET FLUSHES)

COMING!

HI.

HI.

HOW ARE YOU DOING?

PRETTY GOOD. COME ON IN.

I JUST GOT TO THINKING, WITH YOUR ARM HURT AND ALL,

YOU MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO FIX YOUR OWN DINNER,

SO I MADE YOU A LITTLE SOMETHING.

I HOPE YOU LIKE LASAGNA.

I LOVE LASAGNA.

LASAGNA'S, LIKE, MY FAVORITE DISH

OF ALL TIME.

AND I BROUGHT SOME BEER.

OH. I LIKE BEERS, TOO.

GOOD.

(WATER RUNNING)

HAVE YOU GOT COMPANY?

OH, NO.

THE DAMN HOSE FALLS OFF.

THE THING KEEPS FLUSHING.

I GOT TO TAKE THE LID OFF,

THEN I GOT TO FIX THE HOSE

JUST ABOUT...

EVERY DAMN...

TIME.

CHUCK: SHE LOOKED SO BEAUTIFUL,

AND I WAS JUST STANDING THERE

TALKING ABOUT MY BROKEN TOILET.

MAN, I JUST WANTED TO KILL MYSELF.

ANYWAYS...

YOU HUNGRY?

OH! YOU BET!

I'M STARVED. GOOD.

WE COULD SET UP RIGHT HERE. YEAH. PERFECT.

HERE, CAN YOU...

OH. HERE--OH, WOW!

YOU CAN'T EVEN GET DRESSED, CAN YOU? NO.

THE CURSE OF INFERNO.

THAT'S WHAT THEY CALL IT.

WHAT'S THAT MEAN, THE CURSE OF INFERNO?

WELL...PRETTY MUCH EVERYBODY WHO LIVES HERE

WOULD PREFER TO BE LIVING SOMEWHERE ELSE.

BUT THE CURSE IS YOU CAN'T LEAVE INFERNO.

YOU CAN'T LEAVE?

WELL, YOU CAN-- I MEAN, YOU'RE FREE TO GO--

BUT SOMETHING ALWAYS HAPPENS TO KEEP YOU HERE.

THAT RIGHT THERE IS THE CURSE.

THAT'S JUST SO WEIRD!

MOST PEOPLE WORK FOR MOSE HUDDENAL.

THE RICH GUY?

RICHEST MAN IN THIS PART OF TEXAS.

AND MOSE PAYS FOLKS JUST ENOUGH TO KEEP THEM HANGING ON...

BUT NOT ENOUGH SO THEY CAN GET AHEAD

OR GET OUT.

THAT GO FOR YOU, TOO?

YOU WANT TO LEAVE INFERNO?

YEAH. IN THE WORST WAY.

SOMETIMES I WAKE UP, GOT MY EYES SHUT...

AND I THINK, LET ME JUST OPEN UP MY EYES

AND FIND MYSELF ANYWHERE ELSE BUT HERE...

AND THEN YOU OPEN YOUR EYES.

AND I AIN'T MOVED.

I'M IN THE SAME PLACE

SINGING THE SAME SONG...

GOING NOWHERE FAST.

SEEMS TO ME YOU NEED TO DO A LITTLE MORE

THAN JUST CLOSE YOUR EYES AND HOPE.

I GOT A WHOLE PLAN.

I BOUGHT MYSELF A SWEET LITTLE BEECH 18.

A BEECH 18?

IT'S AN AIRPLANE.

IT'S A BEAUTY, ISN'T SHE?

OH, YEAH.

YOU LOOK AT THIS PLANE,

AND YOU ARE LOOKING AT A REAL PIECE OF AVIATION HISTORY.

IT'S NOT SOME FANCY STREAMLINED NUMBER

WITH ALL FLASH AND GADGETS, NO.

THIS RIGHT HERE IS A WORKHORSE.

THIS IS BUILT TO GET THE JOB DONE.

WELL, I'LL TAKE SOLID AND RELIABLE

OVER FANCY ANY DAY.

ME TOO. ABSOLUTELY.

SO, CAN WE GO FOR A RIDE?

A RIDE?

YEAH. COULD WE?

YOU MEAN, LIKE, UP IN THE AIR?

YEAH. LIKE FLYING.

NO. SHE CAN'T FLY.

SHE CAN'T FLY?

RADIAL ENGINES. THEY'RE A REAL PAIN.

THE RIGHT ONE'S GOT NO COMPRESSION.

ALSO GOT A LITTLE THROTTLE LINKAGE PROBLEM.

THE THROTTLE WON'T ADVANCE.

OF COURSE, IF THE THROTTLE DID ADVANCE,

IT WOULDN'T MATTER MUCH.

BECAUSE YOU'D STILL HAVE THE RIGHT ENGINE PROBLEM?

EXACTLY. BUT HAROLD, HE'S GOT IT UNDER CONTROL.

JUST NEEDS A LITTLE WORK,

GET SOME MONEY FOR SOME PARTS,

WE'LL BE UP IN BUSINESS.

WE COULD TAXI IF YOU LIKE.

I'D LOVE TO TAXI.

WORKING FOR MOSE,

I SAVED ENOUGH MONEY TO PAY FOR MY TRAINING.

I GOT ALL MY HOURS SO I COULD FLY LEFT SEAT.

ON DAYS I WASN'T WORKING FOR HIM,

I WAS OVER AT SHREVEPORT

FLYING FOR SOME OTHER PEOPLE,

MAKIN' A LITTLE EXTRA CASH.

THAT'S VERY AMBITIOUS.

MAYBE A LITTLE TOO AMBITIOUS FOR SOME PEOPLE.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

THIS USED TO BE MOSE'S PLANE.

HE BOUGHT A NEW ONE, SO HE DIDN'T USE THIS ONE ANYMORE,

SO HE DECIDED TO SELL IT.

WELL, NOBODY NEEDS 2 PLANES.

THAT'S RIGHT.

SO I SAVED ENOUGH MONEY

TO MAKE A DOWN PAYMENT AND GET A LOAN,

BUT WHEN HE FOUND OUT IT WAS ME BUYING THE PLANE,

HE GOT ALL TICKED OFF, YOU KNOW,

LIKE I'D OVERSTEPPED MY BOUNDARIES.

ARE YOU KIDDIN' ME?

NO.

SO HE LET ME BUY THE PLANE,

THEN TURNED AROUND AND CANNED ME.

HE FIRED YOU?

SO I GOT THE PLANE,

BUT AFTER I MAKE MY MONTHLY PAYMENT,

I AIN'T GOT ENOUGH MONEY TO GET HER UP AND RUNNIN'.

I HATE THAT GUY.

YOU AND ME BOTH.

HOW MUCH WOULD IT COST

TO GET THE PLANE IN WORKING ORDER?

ABOUT 80 GRAND.

YOU KNOW, THAT KIND OF MONEY

IS A LITTLE HARD TO COME BY.

WELL, IF MOSE WOULD HAVE KEPT ME ON,

SLOWLY BUT SURELY I'D HAVE THE MONEY.

HUH.

CHEERS.

WELL, LET'S SAY YOU DID GET THE MONEY, RIGHT?

AND YOU GOT THE PLANE UP AND RUNNING...

WHAT WOULD YOU DO THEN?

ME AND HAROLD...

WE'RE GOING DOWN TO THE CARIBBEAN ISLANDS,

AND WE'RE GONNA START OUR OWN CHARTER PLANE BUSINESS.

WE'RE GONNA FLY PEOPLE FROM THE MAINLAND

TO THE SMALLER ISLANDS, BACK AND FORTH.

WELL, THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.

YEAH.

I THOUGHT SO... BUT I HAVE

THE CURSE OF INFERNO HANGING OVER ME.

WELL, YOU NEVER KNOW. THINGS COULD CHANGE.

CHUCK: WE COULD TALK FOREVER...

ABOUT SOMETHING OR ABOUT NOTHING AT ALL.

IT DIDN'T REALLY MATTER MUCH.

TIME JUST SORT OF EVAPORATED,

AND I WISHED THAT THE WHOLE WORLD WOULD JUST GO AWAY

SO WE COULD BE ALONE TOGETHER...

FOREVER.

(BLUE MOON PLAYS)

OH...

I LOVE THIS SONG.

DO YOU LIKE IT?

YEAH.

ARE YOU INTERESTED IN DANCIN'?

HEH. I'M NOT MUCH OF A DANCER.

* ...A LOVE OF MY OWN *

OKAY, I'D LOVE TO DANCE.

* BLUE MOON... *

CHUCK: OUR BODIES WERE A PERFECT FIT.

THEY WERE, LIKE, DESIGNED TO BE PRESSED TOGETHER.

I FELT SILLY,

AND I WASN'T GONNA BLURT OUT ANYTHING STUPID

LIKE I HAD EARLIER THAT DAY,

BUT I KNEW LAYLA WAS THE ONE.

THAT WAS CLEAR AND SIMPLE.

NOW I JUST HAD TO FIGURE A WAY

TO KEEP HER IN MY LIFE.

* OOOOOH *

* OOOOOH *

* WITHOUT A LOVE OF MY OWN *

* BLUE MOON... *

CHUCK: OF COURSE, THERE STILL WAS ONE SMALL PROBLEM.

STARTING TOMORROW MORNING,

LAYLA HAD TO GO BACK TO WORK.

BACK LOOKING FOR THE GUYS

WHO ROBBED FIRST INFERNO BANK.

AND AS LUCK WOULD HAVE IT, I WAS ONE OF THOSE GUYS.

BUT I DECIDED TO CLOSE MY EYES

AND WORRY ABOUT THAT IN THE MORNING.

REMOVE THE DIRT PARTICLE FROM THE FIBER.

THAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT STEP IN CARPET CLEANING--

LIFTING THE DIRT AWAY WITHOUT DAMAGING.

NOW, HAROLD, DO YOU FEEL THE DIRT

BECOMING DISENGAGED FROM THE CARPET FIBER?

I THINK SO.

FEEL IT.

MASSAGE THE CARPET.

FEEL THE DIRT SEPARATE.

YEAH. I THINK I DO FEEL IT NOW.

THANK YOU.

NOW...LET'S SEE IF YOUR CARPET IS DRY.

OKAY.

YOU SEE, IT CAN FEEL DRY ON TOP,

BUT IS IT DRY DEEP DOWN?

THAT IS THE QUESTION.

WELL?

YES. I THINK IT'S DRY.

NOW WE ARE READY TO LIFT AND SUCK.

WELL, THEN, I GUESS ONE OF US SHOULD HAVE STAYED ON THEIR KNEES.

(SNICKERS)

I DO NOT APPRECIATE THAT KIND OF VULGARITY

AND THERE IS NO ROOM FOR HUMOR

IN THE CARPET CLEANING AND RESTORATION BUSINESS.

DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?

YES, SIR.

VACUUM, PLEASE.

THINK ABOUT THE NAP.

ALWAYS MOVE WITH THE NAP,

NEVER AGAINST THE NAP.

WE DO NOT WANT TO DAMAGE OR ABUSE THE FIBER.

MOVE GENTLY...

WITH THE NAP. WITH THE NAP.

NOT LIKE THIS, NO, NO, THAT'S RIGHT.

BUT LIKE THIS, WITH THE NAP. WITH THE NAP.

COME ON, HAROLD.

WITH THE NAP. WITH THE NAP.

GOOD.

ALL: WITH THE NAP.

THE MOBILE UNIT

IS A VERY VALUABLE PIECE OF EQUIPMENT.

DO NOT--I REPEAT-- DO NOT PARK IT

NEXT TO OTHER VEHICLES.

IF YOU MUST PARK IN A PARKING LOT,

PARK IT IN A FAR CORNER

AWAY FROM THE OTHER VEHICLES.

I DO NOT WANT TO SEE ANY DINGS.

ANY DINGS WILL BE DEDUCTED FROM YOUR PAYCHECK.

AND DINGS AIN'T CHEAP. UNDERSTOOD?

UNDERSTOOD. UNDERSTOOD.

YOU HAVE YOUR CALLS?

YES, WE DO.

REMEMBER-- BE CHEERFUL.

BIG SMILE?

BIG SMILE. VERY GOOD.

BIG SMILE.

GOOD.

AGAINST THE NAP?

WITH THE NAP.

WITH THE NAP.

BYE.

(ENGINE STARTS)

KEEP HER UNDER 50.

(BARKING)

(GROWLING)

MAY I USE YOUR PHONE, PLEASE?

IS IT LOCAL?

NO, MA'AM. I'M CALLING CHINA.

YES, IT'S LOCAL.

IT'S IN THERE, BUT DON'T TAKE LONG.

I'M EXPECTING A VERY IMPORTANT PHONE CALL.

IT'LL ONLY BE A SECOND, MA'AM.

MM-HMM.

HELLO. IS THIS FIRST INFERNO BANK?

I HAVE SOME VERY EXCITING NEWS FOR YOU.

YES. YOUR NAME HAS BEEN DRAWN,

AND YOUR BANK HAS WON

FREE CARPET AND SHAMPOO REJUVENATING TREATMENT.

THAT IS CORRECT...

CHUCK: OH, WHAT A TANGLED WEB I STARTED TO WEAVE.

BUT IF I DID SAY SO MYSELF,

IT WAS ONE BEAUTY OF AN IDEA,

AND IT SPARED US THE TERRIBLE TASK OF RE-ROBBING THE BANK,

WHICH WAS A GOOD THING,

BECAUSE I WASN'T UP FOR GOING THROUGH THAT AGAIN.

IN FACT, AS FAR AS I WAS CONCERNED,

THE SOONER WE COULD GET OUT

OF THE BUSINESS OF BEING CRIMINALS, THE BETTER.

LAYLA AND I SAW EACH OTHER AS OFTEN AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE.

WE'D ARRANGE TO MEET FOR BREAKFAST,

FOR A CUP OF COFFEE IN THE AFTERNOONS...

ANYWHERE AND EVERYWHERE, AS OFTEN AS WE COULD.

UNFORTUNATELY, THE CONVERSATIONS

SOMETIMES TURNED TOWARD THE ISSUE OF HER WORK,

AND THESE TALKS, THEY MADE ME MORE THAN A LITTLE UNCOMFORTABLE.

I WAS THINKING THAT MAYBE THEY WEREN'T WORKING TOGETHER,

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

THAT THERE WERE 2 PARTIES OF 2,

AND THEY JUST HAPPENED TO ROB THE SAME BANK

AT THE SAME TIME.

I DON'T KNOW. DOES THAT MAKE SENSE?

CHUCK: I WANTED TO BE HELPFUL,

BUT OF COURSE, I DIDN'T WANT TO BE TOO HELPFUL.

IT SEEMS LIKE THE ODDS MIGHT BE AGAINST IT A LITTLE.

I MEAN, 2 PAIRS OF ROBBERS

SHOWING UP ALL AT THE SAME TIME COINCIDENTALLY AND ALL?

YEAH...

I'D HAVE TO SAY--

AND THIS IS JUST BY ME GUESSIN'--

THAT THEY WERE PROBABLY ALL WORKIN' TOGETHER, ALL 4.

AND FOR MY MONEY, I BET THEY'RE LONG GONE.

I DON'T KNOW.

IT'D SURE BE A REAL FEATHER IN MY CAP

IF I CAUGHT 'EM.

THEY HAVE TO PAY FOR THEIR CRIME.

ONE WAY OR ANOTHER, THEY HAVE TO PAY.

I CAN'T ARGUE WITH THAT.

CHUCK: I WAS HOPING SHE WAS WRONG,

BUT I HAD A FEELING SHE WAS RIGHT.

ONE WAY OR ANOTHER, YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR YOUR CRIME.

I SURE AM HAVING A GOOD TIME.

ME, TOO.

AS A MATTER OF FACT,

I'M HAVING THE TIME OF MY LIFE.

ME, TOO.

(WHISPERING) DO YOU WANNA GO TAKE A WALK?

WHERE TO?

I DON'T KNOW. JUST THOUGHT WE COULD TAKE A WALK.

OK. LET'S TAKE A WALK.

YEAH.

OK, COME ON. COME ON.

YOU KNOW, I WOULDN'T MIND

HAVING THAT LITTLE POLICE UNIFORM

WADDED UP IN A BALL AT THE FOOT OF MY BED.

HEH HEH HEH...

CHUCKIE BOY...

WHAT A KLUTZ.

IT WAS CHUCK THAT WAS GONNA COME OVER

THE DAY THE BANK GOT HIT.

SOME GIRLS JUST LOVE LOSERS.

HEH. MAYBE I SHOULD HAVE BEEN A LOSER.

MIGHT HAVE GOTTEN A LITTLE MORE...

NAH.

PROBABLY NOT.

SORRY. I...

DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE WAITING.

OK, BOYS.

ANY WORD?

NO.

I'VE BEEN IN CONSTANT TOUCH

WITH SHERIFF GIBSON.

HE'S FOLLOWING UP ON THAT LEAD IN HOUSTON--

2 GUYS WITH LENGTHY RECORDS

SPENDING CASH, BUYING NEW CARS,

STUFF LIKE THAT.

YOU EVER SEE ONE OF THOSE GUYS AT A CARNIVAL

BITE THE HEADS OFF OF LIVE CHICKENS?

YEAH.

YOU ASK YOURSELF HOW COULD A GUY

BITE THE HEADS OFF OF LIVE CHICKENS?

WONDER WHAT DRIVES THEM TO IT?

TO JUST CHEW ON A LIVE CHICKEN?

YOU KNOW? (CHUCKLES)

I CAN TELL YOU WHY.

IT'S THIS KIND OF AGGRAVATION.

'CAUSE AT THIS VERY MINUTE,

I COULD MYSELF...

CLAMP MY TEETH RIGHT DOWN...

ON SOME POOR LITTLE UNSUSPECTING CHICKEN.

NEVER THINK TWICE ABOUT IT.

WHY?

I CAN TELL YOU.

'CAUSE I'M TICKED OFF.

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON AROUND HERE?

WE'RE GETTING THE CARPETS CLEANED.

CARPETS CLEANED? WHO BY?

THAT GUY. UH, WIZARD?

STUPID GUY WITH A FUNNY TRUCK?

YUP.

HOW'D ALL THIS COME ABOUT?

ONE OF MY ASSISTANT MANAGERS GOT A PHONE CALL,

AND IT SEEMS WE WON A FREE CARPET CLEANING.

WON A FREE CARPET CLEANING?

YES. I BELIEVE THEY PICKED NUMBERS OUT OF A HAT.

YEAH, AND I BELIEVE I KNOW WHOSE HAT THAT IS.

I JUST GOTTA USE THE REST ROOM.

GO AHEAD.

THANK YOU.

WHERE THE HELL...

I DON'T BELIEVE...

AAH! (THUD)

(TOILET FLUSHES)

GUARD: HEY, IS EVERYTHING OK IN THERE?

YEAH.

UHH, NOTHING BROKEN. NOBODY HURT.

THIS DAMN BATHROOM'S NOTHING BUT TROUBLE.

YES.

OH, YES.

(WHISTLING)

HEY, HOW'S IT GOING?

PRETTY GOOD. THIS IS THE PART WHERE PEOPLE WALK IN AND OUT.

IT'S KIND OF A MESS, BUT I'M GONNA GET IT.

FORGET THE RUG. THAT AIN'T WHY WE'RE HERE.

OK.

LET'S GO.

HE'S A LOT SMARTER THAN I GAVE HIM CREDIT FOR.

MAYBE I SHOULDN'T HAVE FIRED HIS BUTT AFTER ALL.

NAH.

LET'S FOLLOW 'EM.

NOT TOO CLOSE. LET 'EM GET OUTTA TOWN.

I JUST WISH THERE WAS A WAY

WE COULD LEAVE THE REST OF THE MONEY BEHIND.

YOU KNOW, I MEAN, WE USE WHAT WE NEED

TO GET THE PLANE UP AND RUNNING,

THEN IF WE COULD JUST SEND THE REST OF THE MONEY BACK.

WE COULD DO WHAT PEOPLE DO

WITH THEIR KIDS WHEN THEY DON'T WANT THEM.

WHAT'S THAT?

WE'D PUT 'EM IN A BLANKET ON A FRONT PORCH,

RING THE DOORBELL, AND YOU HAUL OUT.

SOMEBODY COMES OUT, AND THEY SEE THE BLANKET,

THEY GET ALL NERVOUS 'CAUSE THEY THINK

THERE'S GONNA BE A KID CRYING

AND MESSIN' ALL OVER THE PLACE,

THEN IT TURNS OUT TO BE, LIKE, $1 MILLION,

AND THEY GO, "OH, WOW! THIS AIN'T A KID!

IT'S, LIKE, A MILLION BUCKS!"

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT IDEA?

YOU LOST ME RIGHT AFTER YOU RING THE DOORBELL.

SPEED UP.

THEY SPEEDIN' UP?

HUH?

UH, YEAH.

WE MIGHT NOT HAVE TO WORRY

ABOUT GIVING THAT MONEY AWAY AFTER ALL.

PULL ALONGSIDE.

WATCH IT, WATCH IT, HAROLD. WATCH IT! OH!

LOOK OUT!

HEY!

WHOOOO!

HA HA!

YEAH! DAMN, HAROLD.

THAT WAS GOOD DRIVIN', HAROLD.

HERE THEY COME.

OH...NO.

DAMN IT.

THEY'RE ON THE SIDE. LOOK OUT...

AAAH! AAH!

(BOTH SCREAM)

GET AWAY FROM THERE.

GO ON, GIT!

AND KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT.

HE'S KINDA PLAYING HELL WITH THE WIZARD MOBILE UNIT.

YEAH. KINDA.

GOT SOMETHING.

IT'S ABOUT TIME.

(CHUCKLES)

HOLY SHUCKS.

WHERE'S THE MONEY?

I DON'T KNOW.

OKAY. ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT. HERE WE GO.

CHUCK...

ARE YOU MESSIN' WITH ME?

ARE YOU TRYING TO PUSH MY BUTTON?

IF YOU ARE, YOU ARE DOING A WING-DING OF A JOB.

NO, SIR, I'M NOT TRYING TO PUSH YOUR BUTTON.

I TELL YOU ONE THING I KNOW.

YOU GOT $3 MILLION OF MY MONEY.

I THOUGHT THE MONEY WAS THE B--

I'LL DO THE TALKIN' HERE.

I'M A PATIENT MAN.

NOW, SEE, I APPRECIATE A SMART PLAN.

YES, SIR.

AND THAT BUSINESS OF YOU ROBBIN' THAT BANK

AND LEAVIN' THE MONEY THERE IS A GEM, HMM?

YES. AND THE DECOY BUSINESS TODAY.

THAT'S SMART STUFF.

YOU'RE SHREWD, CHUCK.

THANK YOU, SIR.

THAT WAS MY IDEA.

SHUT UP.

YOU EVER HEARD THE SAYIN'...

DON'T MUCK WITH A TRUCK WHEN YOU'RE DRIVIN' A JEEP?

NO, I DON'T BELIEVE I HAVE.

WHAT THAT MEANS IS,

I COULD KILL YOU RIGHT NOW

IF I THOUGHT IT'D GET ME CLOSER TO MY MONEY.

I'D SLIT YOUR GULLET LIKE A BAG OF MARBLES

AND WATCH YOUR GUTS ROLL OUT ON THE GROUND.

ANY PART OF THAT I JUST SAID YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND?

THE PART WITH THE TRUCK AND THE JEEP--

SHUT UP.

NO. I THINK I GOT IT ALL.

YOU GOT 48 HOURS, CUSTARD HEAD.

48 HOURS. THAT'S WHAT YOU'VE GOT

UNTIL I SEE MY MONEY AGAIN,

OR I TURN YOU INTO FERTILIZER MIX.

OKAY?

NOW, GET AWAY FROM MY CAR.

WHERE DID ALL THE SHREDDED NEWSPAPER COME FROM?

I DON'T KNOW.

WHERE'D THE MONEY GO?

(SIGHS) NOT A CLUE.

(BACKFIRING)

MY VAN...

MY VAN...

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY VAN?

OH, GOD...

I THINK WE'RE GONNA GET CANNED.

YOU THINK SO?

HERE'S YOUR HEAD.

OUT OF MY SIGHT.

OUT OF MY SIGHT, YOU MONSTERS!

YOU MONSTERS!

CHUCK...

CHUCK, WHAT ABOUT THE UNIFORMS?

GOT ANY IDEAS?

NOT ONE.

AND WHAT'S MORE IS I DON'T CARE.

THE LESS WE KNOW, THE BETTER OFF WE ARE.

HOW'S THAT?

WE DON'T HAVE THE MONEY, DON'T KNOW WHERE THE MONEY IS...

THAT'S ABOUT AS CLOSE TO INNOCENT AS WE'RE GONNA GET.

IT'S KIND OF...

IT'S ALL KIND OF...

IRONIC, AIN'T IT?

YEAH. IT'S KIND OF IRONIC.

IT DOES MEAN ONE THING, CHUCK.

WE AIN'T LEAVIN' INFERNO.

WE AIN'T GONNA OPEN OUR CHARTER PLANE BUSINESS.

CHUCK: IN ALL THE CRAZINESS AND CONFUSION, I ALMOST FORGOT

WHY WE EVEN WANTED THE MONEY IN THE FIRST PLACE.

BUT LEAVE IT TO HAROLD TO REMEMBER THAT WE HAD A DREAM.

YOU GOT THAT RIGHT, HAROLD.

WE AIN'T LEAVING INFERNO.

WE AIN'T GOT OUR CARPET CLEANING JOBS, EITHER.

NOPE.

BASICALLY, WE AIN'T GOT ZIP.

THAT PRETTY MUCH SUMS IT UP, HAROLD.

SEE YOU.

SEE YOU.

CHUCK: IT WAS WRONG TO ROB THE BANK. I KNEW THAT FROM THE GET GO.

I FIGURED SOME STUFF MIGHT GO DOWN,

BUT I HAD NO IDEA AS TO WHAT KIND OF STUFF OR HOW MUCH.

STILL, THE MONEY WAS BEHIND ME, AND I WAS GLAD OF THAT.

OF COURSE, IF I DID LEARN ANYTHING FROM THIS EXPERIENCE,

IT WAS THAT THINGS ARE SELDOM AS THEY APPEAR TO BE.

SHUCKS,

WELCOME HOME, HONEY.

I CAN SEE YOU DID A LITTLE REDECORATING.

I DID. HOW DO YOU LIKE IT?

TO TELL THE TRUTH, I'M NOT SURE THE TABLE'S IN THE RIGHT PLACE.

THERE'S A NASTY RUMOR GOING ROUND ABOUT YOU.

IS THAT SO?

DON'T GET LIPPY WITH ME, BOY.

YOU'RE LIABLE TO GET YOUR HEAD BUSTED,

AND I'M THINKING YOU BEEN MESSED UP ENOUGH

IN THE LAST 24 HOURS.

I AIN'T GOT NO FINGERPRINTS...

NO HARD EVIDENCE...

BUT WHAT I DO HAVE IS INSTINCTS.

AND RIGHT NOW, MY INSTINCTS ARE TELLING ME

THAT YOU HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THAT BANK ROBBERY.

I ALREADY TOLD YOU--

I WAS IN THE BANK DOING SOME BUSINESS,

AND WHILE I WAS THERE, I WENT TO THE BATHROOM.

THEN I HEARD ALL THE COMMOTION OUTSIDE.

YEAH.

I CHECKED,

AND YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE AN ACCOUNT AT FIRST INFERNO.

WELL, I KNOW THAT.

I WAS THERE TO OPEN AN ACCOUNT.

I COULD HAUL YOUR SKINNY, LITTLE WHITE BUTT INTO JAIL IF I WANTED TO.

YEAH? ON WHAT CHARGES, SIR?

OH, I COULD THINK OF SOMETHING IF I HAD TO.

BUT I THINK I'LL JUST HANG AROUND HERE

AND KEEP AN EYE ON YOU...

AND LET YOU MESS UP.

AND YOU WILL MESS UP.

I'M SURE OF THAT.

YOU OUGHTTA FIX THAT TOILET, BOY.

(WATER RUNNING)

OH, MY GOD!

IT'S BACK.

IT SAYS HERE THE CESSNA CARAVAN

COSTS, LIKE, $1.3 MILLION, SEATS 12.

THAT'S AMAZING.

WELL, I'M A LITTLE PARTIAL TO THIS ONE-SEATER MYSELF.

YOU ARE, ARE YOU?

I AM.

WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HEAD AGAIN?

WELL, VACUUM CLEANER HOSE FLEW UP, HIT ME ON THE HEAD.

THAT CARPET CLEANING'S A DANGEROUS BUSINESS.

CHUCK: HERE AGAIN WAS THE TROUBLE OF TELLING ONE FIB.

ONE LEADS TO 2, LEADS TO 4, LEADS TO 8, TO 16 AND SO ON.

LYING TO LAYLA RUINED THE THING I LIKED BEST ABOUT HER--

WELL, THE SECOND THING I LIKED BEST ABOUT LAYLA--

AND THAT WAS OUR ABILITY TO TALK.

IT WAS ALL SCREWED UP,

AND I WASN'T SURE HOW I WAS GONNA FIX IT.

BUT I WAS GONNA FIND A WAY AT SOME POINT.

I WASN'T SURE WHEN, BUT I WAS GONNA SPILL THE BEANS

AND COME CLEAN WITH LAYLA.

BUT NOT RIGHT THIS VERY SECOND.

HEH. IN THE JOHN?

YEAH. IN BAGGIES, ALL NICE AND NEAT.

GOT ANY IDEAS WHO PUT IT THERE?

NOPE. BUT I DO KNOW ONE THING--

WHAT'S THAT?

SOMEBODY OUT THERE KNOWS A WHOLE LOT MORE THAN WE DO.

YEAH, THAT WOULD MAKE SENSE.

HOW ARE YOU GONNA DO THIS?

I THOUGHT I'D TELL SHERIFF GIBSON

THAT I FOUND IT IN A TRASH BARREL.

IT'S GONNA SOUND A LITTLE FISHY, BUT WHAT DOES HE CARE?

HE'S GONNA GET HIS MONEY BACK.

WHAT ABOUT MOSE?

HO...

YEAH, MOSE.

THAT MAN'S GONNA WANT TO KICK MY TAIL.

BUT HEY, ONCE THE MONEY'S OUT OF MY HANDS,

THE MONEY'S OUT OF MY HANDS.

I CAN'T GIVE THE MAN SOMETHING I DON'T GOT.

YOU GONNA GIVE HIM EVERY LAST PENNY?

YEAH. EVERY LAST PENNY.

IT'S THE BEST THING, HAROLD.

WHATEVER YOU SAY.

A TRASH BARREL?

YEAH. A BIG OLD OIL DRUM.

IN FACT, I WAS ABOUT TO POUR SOME OIL IN THERE, AND I LOOKED DOWN.

IT'S A LUCKY THING I DID.

YEAH. LUCKY THING.

AND THERE WAS ALL THIS CASH.

IT WAS JUST SITTIN' THERE.

NOW, JUST HOW MUCH CASH

IS "ALL THIS CASH"?

WELL, THAT'S ANOTHER THING WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT.

BOO! (HONKS HORN)

OH, I'M SORRY, HAROLD.

LITTLE JUMPY, ARE WE?

HI. I DIDN'T SEE YOU. YOU CAUGHT ME OFF GUARD.

OH, WELL, I'M SORRY.

WHAT ARE YOU DOIN'?

I'M JUST WAITIN' ON CHUCK.

WHERE IS HE? I'VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND HIM.

HE'S OVER THERE.

WHAT'S HE DOIN'?

OH. WELL, HE'S JUST...

TAKING CARE OF SOME BUSINESS

THAT NEEDED STRAIGHTENING OUT.

WHAT KIND OF BUSINESS?

I'M AFRAID I CAN'T SAY, LAYLA.

YOU CAN'T SAY?

NOPE.

IT'S--IT'S PERSONAL.

YOU UNDERSTAND.

YEAH.

BYE!

WHERE'S THE MONEY NOW, BOY?

IT'S NICE AND SAFE,

BUT I DO HAVE ONE MAJOR CONCERN.

I KNOW THERE'S A FEW PEOPLE IN TOWN THAT MIGHT THINK

I HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THE BANK BEING ROBBED.

YEAH, SOME PEOPLE MIGHT HAVE SOME SUSPICIONS, RIGHT.

THE COINCIDENCE OF ME BEING STUCK IN THE TOILET

AND ME BEING THE ONE WHO FOUND THE MONEY,

THEY MIGHT BE A LITTLE MORE INCLINED

TO THINK I'M THE GUY WHO DID IT.

THEY MIGHT.

LOOK, I'M JUST TRYING TO DO THE ABOVE-THE-BOARD THING HERE,

AND I WOULD LIKE YOUR WORD THAT MY GOOD DEED

WON'T CAUSE ME ANY PUNISHMENT OR HARM,

OR TO BE MORE SPECIFIC, I DON'T WANNA DO ANY JAIL TIME.

LET ME TELL YOU THIS, BOY.

YOU GET THAT MONEY BACK TO ME,

ALL $3 MILLION OF IT,

AND YOU CAN WALK OUT OF HERE A FREE MAN.

WELL, THEN I'D HAVE TO SAY WE'RE IN BUSINESS, SHERIFF GIBSON.

NOW, HERE'S WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO.

YOU SURE THAT MONEY'S SAFE?

YEAH.

ALL RIGHT. 8:00 TONIGHT,

MEET ME OVER AT THE CARAVAN HOTEL.

YOU KNOW WHERE THE CARAVAN IS?

OUT ON HIGHWAY 5.

THAT'S RIGHT.

YOU MEET ME THERE...

WITH THE MONEY.

WHY ARE WE MEETIN' THERE?

'CAUSE THERE'S A LOT OF FUNNY BUSINESS

GOIN' ON HERE LATELY, SON--

I MEAN, MONEY SHOWING UP,

MONEY DISAPPEARING.

I JUST WANNA BE REAL EXTRA CAREFUL.

I SEE.

THE CARAVAN HOTEL IS IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE.

ANYTHING SCREWY GOIN' ON...

I'M GONNA BE ABLE TO SEE IT COMIN'.

ALL RIGHT.

8:00.

YOU COME ALONE.

ALL RIGHT.

THANK YOU, SHERIFF GIBSON.

NOW, YOU LIVIN' REAL CLOSE TO THE EDGE HERE, BOY,

SO DON'T MESS IT UP.

I THINK THAT'S A VERY SMART IDEA.

WELL, THANK YOU.

RIGHT HERE?

YEAH.

PEOPLE DON'T THINK AHEAD.

THAT'S THEIR TROUBLE.

THEY WALK IN HERE ON DECEMBER THE 15TH

AND BEMOAN THE FACT

THAT THEY HAVEN'T SET UP THEIR CHRISTMAS SAVINGS ACCOUNT.

THEY BLAME ME FOR NOT TELLING THEM.

WELL, I'M NOT GONNA BE ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE.

NO, YOU WON'T, AND I RESPECT THAT.

I RESPECT SOMEONE WHO KNOWS THE IMPORTANCE

OF THINKING AHEAD AND PUTTING SOMETHING ASIDE.

THOSE ARE ADMIRABLE TRAITS.

THANK YOU.

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

WHOA. UH...

JUST ONE SECOND.

SORRY.

THAT'S OK. I WAS JUST LEAVIN'.

MISS MOANES WAS JUST OPENING UP

HER NEW CHRISTMAS SAVINGS ACCOUNT,

SOMETHING I'D BE WILLING TO BET

YOU HAVE NEGLECTED TO DO.

YEAH.

WELL, OK.

I'LL BE ON MY WAY.

I'LL BE SEEIN' YOU.

LAYLA: BYE.

(WHISTLES)

SHE DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING, DID SHE?

SHE ASK ANY QUESTIONS?

NO. SHE JUST SET UP

HER CHRISTMAS SAVINGS ACCOUNT, THAT'S ALL.

GIBSON: KID CRACKED JUST LIKE I SAID HE WOULD.

CRACKED?

YEAH. THAT LITTLE BIRD HEAD HAD THE MONEY ALL ALONG.

AND JUST LIKE I PREDICTED, THAT VISIT TO HIS HOUSE,

THAT SHOOK HIM UP QUITE A BIT.

I MEAN, I SCARED THE BEJEEBERS OUT OF HIM.

I LET HIM KNOW WHAT LIFE WOULD BE LIKE

WITH ME SHININ' A FLASHLIGHT IN HIS FACE EVERY 30 MINUTES.

SOUNDS UNPLEASANT.

OH, IT IS. IT'S VERY UNPLEASANT.

SO WHAT'S NEXT?

YOU GO STRAIGHT TO THE AIRFIELD.

GET US A FLIGHT OUT THIS EVENING ANYTIME AFTER 10:00.

2 SEATS?

YEAH.

ANGEL CALLIN' MONTGOMERY.

THE BIRD HAS THE WORM. WE GOTTA MOVE FAST.

I NEED BACKUP.

ALWAYS BEEN MY PROBLEM.

I'M TOO NICE.

I AM TOO LENIENT WITH PEOPLE.

I LET 'EM SLIDE

WHEN I OUGHT TO STAND ON THEIR STUPID NECKS.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

ABSOLUTELY. TOO NICE.

YEAH. YOU'RE NICE TO PEOPLE, IT COMES BACK,

BITES YOU IN THE TAIL.

I GAVE CHUCKY 48 HOURS.

I SHOULD HAVE GIVEN HIM 15 MINUTES.

SEE, I BEEN THINKIN'...

GOT THE OLD BRAIN WORKIN'.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT TELLS ME?

NO.

2 AND 2 IS 4.

CHUCK ROBBED THE BANK.

CHUCK LEFT THE MONEY IN THE BANK.

THAT'S PRETTY SMART.

BUT HE DIDN'T HAVE IT WHEN WE PICKED HIM UP.

NO. NO.

SO...

WHO GOT IN THE BANK?

WHO GOT PAST THE POLICE BARRICADES?

WHO HAD THAT KIND OF ACCESS?

I'LL TELL YOU WHO!

HIS LITTLE GIRLFRIEND!

I'LL BET YOU ANYTHING SHE HAS MY MONEY

OR SHE SURE SHOULD KNOW WHERE IT IS!

THAT'S WHY WE'RE GONNA PAY HER A LITTLE VISIT.

COME ON!

YOU'RE NOT LAYLA.

NO JOKE.

IS SHE AROUND?

COULD BE.

WHO'S ASKIN'?

JUST TELL HER... CHUCK'S HERE.

YOU CHUCK?

YEAH. ME CHUCK.

WHO'RE YOU?

CHUCK!

LAYLA.

CHUCK: IT WAS LIKE MY ANTENNA HAD BLOWN OVER.

ALL CHANNELS WERE OUT. MY PICTURE WAS ROLLIN'.

MY SPEAKERS WERE SPEWIN' STATIC.

I MEAN, WHO WERE HUEY AND DEWEY,

AND WHAT WERE THEY DOIN' HERE?

AHEM. CLIFFORD AND VINCE, THIS IS CHUCK.

HELLO.

YEAH. WELL, LISTEN, VINCE AND CLIFF KNOW EVERYTHING.

THEY'RE FROM THE BUREAU. THEY'RE HERE TO HELP US OUT.

OH, THAT'S GOOD.

FOR A SECOND, I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT WAS GOIN' ON.

CHUCK: AS A MATTER OF FACT,

I STILL DIDN'T KNOW WHAT WAS GOIN' ON,

BUT I DECIDED TO SIT TIGHT AND PLAY ALONG.

WE'RE GONNA TELL EVERYONE WE'RE BASEBALL PLAYERS,

IN CASE ANYBODY ASKS.

WOULD YOU JUST CUT IT WITH THE MINOR-LEAGUE BASEBALL CRUD?

NOBODY'S ASKIN'. NOBODY GIVES A DAMN.

YOU'RE CHASIN' A DREAM THAT NEVER WILL BE, CLIFFORD.

YOU DON'T KNOW. I COULD'VE--

OH. HEY!

I MADE SOME ICE TEA. WOULD YOU LIKE A GLASS?

OK, I BROUGHT THEM UP TO SPEED

REGARDING THE TRANSFER OF MONEY.

THAT'S, UH, AROUND 8:00, RIGHT?

UH, YEAH.

THAT'LL GIVE US A LITTLE BIT OVER 2 HOURS.

STILL AT THAT MOTEL?

YEAH. CARAVAN OUT ON HIGHWAY 5.

HIGHLY UNUSUAL

BRINGING A CIVILIAN IN IN THIS MANNER.

I HAVE BEEN DOWN HERE ALONE, WORKING WITHOUT A NET,

DOING A JOB NOBODY ELSE WANTED TO DO,

AND I NEEDED HELP,

AND CHUCK HAS BEEN A GREAT HELP,

AND WE CAN TRUST HIM.

HOW MANY POINTS OF ACCESS ARE WE TALKIN'?

POINTS OF ACCESS?

HOW MANY DOORS DOES ONE OF THESE MOTEL ROOMS HAVE?

OH. JUST ONE.

BEEN THERE A FEW TIMES, HAVE WE?

AH HEH.

YEAH.

ONE DOOR SIMPLIFIES MATTERS.

YEAH. WE'LL JUST BAIT THE TRAP.

HOLD ON HALF A DAMN SECOND.

I HAVE BEEN HERE 4 MONTHS, SWEATIN' MY BUNS OFF,

IF YOU THINK I'M GETTIN' STUCK WITH THE ASSIGNMENT FROM HELL,

AND YOU'RE GONNA POP BY IN THE 11TH HOUR

AND START CALLIN' THE SHOTS, YOU GOT ANOTHER THING COMIN'.

BUT YOU-- NO, I KNOW,

I BROUGHT A CIVILIAN INTO PLAY,

BUT THERE ARE EXTENUATING CIRCUMSTANCES

WHICH I WILL EXPLAIN AT THE RIGHT TIME.

BUT AS FAR AS WHAT WE DO AND HOW,

I AM CALLIN' THE SHOTS. IF YOU DON'T LIKE THAT,

THEN DON'T LET MY POINT OF ACCESS HIT YOU ON THE WAY OUT.

NOW, WHAT TIME

ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO BE MEETIN' GIBSON?

8:00.

I'M SUPPOSED TO CALL HIM ONCE I CHECK IN.

ALL RIGHT. Y'ALL BETTER GET GOIN'.

BE SURE TO GET A ROOM THAT CONNECTS TO ANOTHER ROOM.

AND THEN, ABOUT 15 MINUTES LATER,

YOU GUYS CHECK IN AND GET A ROOM NEXT DOOR.

NOW-- WAIT A MINUTE, GUYS.

CHUCK, WE'RE GONNA GIVE YOU A WIRE.

THAT WAY, THE BOYS'LL KNOW WHAT'S GOIN' ON.

NOW, REMEMBER, NOBODY-- NOBODY MAKES A MOVE

UNTIL I GIVE THE WORD. GOT IT?

GOT IT.

OK. I'LL BE IN THE CAR.

WE'LL GIVE GIBSON AND LONNIE SOME RUNNING ROOM.

THAT WAY, THERE WON'T BE ANY QUESTION

WHEN WE GET TO COURT ABOUT MOTIVATION.

KNOW WHAT I JUST REALIZED? WHAT'S THAT?

MOSE HUDDENAL SLIPPED THROUGH THE NET AGAIN.

THAT'S RIGHT.

YEAH. WELL...

YOU KNOW, I THOUGHT I HAD HIM.

S.O.B. HAS 9 LIVES.

WE GOT NOTHIN' ON HIM.

NOW, LISTEN, REMEMBER,

NOBODY MAKES A MOVE UNLESS I GIVE THE WORD.

ALL RIGHT?

OK. BETTER GET GOIN'.

LISTEN, CHUCK, GOOD LUCK,

AND THANKS AGAIN FOR ALL YOUR HELP, OK?

THANK YOU.

YEP.

CHUCK: NEEDLESS TO SAY, I WAS A LITTLE DIZZY.

I FELT LIKE SOMEBODY HAD THROWN ME IN THE DRYER

AND SET THE DIAL FOR PERMANENT PRESS.

I SUPPOSE I COULD HAVE BEEN UPSET

TO FIND OUT THAT LAYLA WAS ONTO ME FROM THE GET-GO.

IN FACT, IT'D BE FAIR TO SAY

THAT SHE PLAYED ME LIKE A FIDDLE.

BUT I WASN'T UPSET.

I KIND OF DUG THE FACT THAT LAYLA WAS SO SMART,

SO ON TOP OF THE SITUATION.

AND LET'S JUST FACE IT.

I DUG THE FACT THAT SHE LIFTED THE NOOSE

FROM AROUND MY ALMOST-DOOMED NECK.

THE WHOLE SCHEME WAS PRETTY SIMPLE

ONCE YOU FIGURED IT OUT.

LONNIE KNEW MOSE HAD A LOT OF CASH MOVIN' THROUGH THE BANK.

LONNIE AND GIBSON FIGURED THEY'D HIT THE BANK

AND SPLIT THE 3 MILLION BUCKS.

BUT WHAT NOBODY COUNTED ON WAS ME AND HAROLD.

(THUMPING AND GRUNTING)

32-34.

HOW CAN IT BE 32-34?

I SCORED ON MY LAST 3 POSSESSIONS.

LOOK, IT WAS 24-32.

YOU SCORED 6 POINTS.

I JUST SCORED.

THAT MAKES IT 32-34.

DO THE MATH.

CHECK.

MOSE: EVENIN', DARLIN'.

WELL, WHAT A SURPRISE.

YOU SURE ARE LOOKIN' GOOD.

WHAT DO YOU WANT?

AND SHE'S GOT A LITTLE BITE TO HER.

(LAUGHING)

I LIKE THAT.

WHERE ARE YOU HEADIN' FOR, GIRL?

SOMEWHERE.

I'D BE WILLIN' TO BET THAT "SOMEWHERE"

IS WHERE CHUCKY BOY IS WITH MY MONEY

AND YOU'RE GONNA GO AND MEET HIM

AND YOU AND HIM AND MY MONEY

ARE GONNA HEAD FOR THE HILLS.

I GUESS WE WERE FOOLS

TRYIN' TO PUT ANYTHING OVER ON YOU.

YEAH. HEH HEH.

BUT I'M A NICE GUY.

I'M WILLIN' TO DO YOU A BIG FAVOR.

I'M HOLDIN' MY BREATH.

I'M WILLIN' TO DRIVE YOU OUT THERE WHERE CHUCKY IS.

I DON'T WANT A RIDE.

"WANT" IS NOT AN ISSUE HERE.

YOU'LL EITHER GET IN THE CAR, TAKE US WHERE CHUCKY IS,

OR THE BOYS HERE'LL TIE YOU UP,

I'LL PUT A BIG, OLD GAG IN YOUR MOUTH,

AND YOU CAN LAY AROUND GOING, "MRR MRR MRR" LIKE THIS

WHILE YOUR BOYFRIEND CHUCKY IS DANGLIN' OUT THERE

WAITIN' FOR YOU.

FINE.

LET'S GO.

DO YOU HAVE, UH, SOMETHIN' IN THERE

THAT YOU WANT HARV TO HOLD FOR YOU?

HERE YOU GO. THANK YOU.

OH! AHH...

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE CALLIN' GOALTENDING.

YOU GOALTENDED.

(WHISPERING) THEY'RE HERE.

THEY'RE 15 MINUTES EARLY, BUT THEY'RE HERE.

CAN YOU GUYS HEAR ME?

STEVE FIELD WAS MY PARTNER FOR 6 YEARS.

HE NEVER CALLED GOALTENDING.

WELL, MAYBE YOU NEVER GOALTENDED.

(KNOCK ON CHUCK'S DOOR)

THEY'RE RIGHT OUTSIDE THE DOOR.

(POUNDING ON DOOR)

WHO IS IT?

GIBSON: HOWDY DOODY! OPEN THE DAMN DOOR!

YOU GUYS ARE A LITTLE EARLY.

YEAH. WELL, YOU'RE A LITTLE UGLY.

(WHISPERING) ANGEL, COME IN.

NOTHING.

ANGEL, COME IN.

(SIGHS)

DAMN, WHAT A LOVELY SIGHT.

AIN'T THAT A LOVELY SIGHT?

OH, AND AREN'T YOU ONE LITTLE SNEAKY SON OF A BUCK.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKIN' ABOUT.

OH, "I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKIN' ABOUT."

AIN'T THAT PRECIOUS?

MR. INNOCENT, HERE.

LIKE I TOLD YOU, I FOUND THE MONEY

IN A TRASH BARREL BEHIND THE HANGAR.

WHAT DO YOU WANNA DO?

WELL, LIKE SHE SAID, IT'S HER SHOW.

WE GOTTA WAIT FOR HER GO-AHEAD.

WHAT I IF I TOLD YOU THAT I DON'T BUY YOUR...

DAMN "MONEY IN AN OIL BARREL" BULL?

WHAT IF I SAID I THINK YOU'RE LYIN' THROUGH YOUR TEETH?

CAN WE GET OUT OF HERE?

WOULD YOU SHUT UP?

WHAT IF I SAID THAT?

ALL I CAN TELL YOU IS WHAT I KNOW.

I FOUND THE MONEY IN AN OIL BARREL.

YOU'RE THE SHERIFF, SO I--I CAME TO YOU,

ASSUMING YOU'D DO THE RIGHT THING.

I GOT A GOOD MIND TO KICK YOUR TAIL.

WHAT'S SO FUNNY?

IT'S JUST THAT "GOOD MIND" PART SEEMS A LITTLE QUESTIONABLE.

HA HA HA HA.

UNH!

DAMN LITTLE SMART BOY.

I WANT TO GET OUT OF HERE.

I TOLD YOU WE'LL GO IN A MINUTE!

TAKIN' CARE OF BUSINESS HERE.

HA HA HA HA HA.

YOU KNOW, YOU MIGHT REALLY GROW TO LIKE

THIS BEIN' TIED UP, BOY.

I TELL YOU WHAT.

I BELIEVE YOU'RE GONNA REGRET

THE DAY YOU EVER MET ME.

LET'S SEE YOU TRY TO GET OUT OF THAT.

THEY'RE WALKIN' OUT THE DOOR.

WE CAN'T WAIT ANY LONGER.

LET'S DO IT.

HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' HERE?!

MOSE: COME ON OUT HERE

AND GIVE ME WHAT'S MINE,

OR I'M COMIN' IN THERE!

CLIFF: FBI! PUT DOWN YOUR GUNS!

DON'T SHOOT! DON'T SHOOT!

OK! DON'T YOU FBI BOYS DO ANYTHING STUPID,

OR I WILL KILL THIS LOVELY YOUNG POLICE OFFICER!

I SWEAR I WILL.

GET IN.

GO ON!

I'LL KILL HER!

AAH!

HOLD THOSE GUYS.

(TRUCK HONKS)

LOOKS LIKE YOU'VE RUN OUT OF ROOM, SOUP-FOR-BRAINS.

I'VE TAKEN ALL THE GRIEF OFF HIM I'M GONNA TAKE!

(GUNSHOT)

GET HIM!

VINCE: LET'S GO.

AND DON'T TRY ANYTHING.

OK. LAYLA: STAY DOWN.

DON'T GET UP! DON'T GET UP!

OK.

OK.

YOU OK?

I THINK I ATE THE AIR CONDITIONER.

FLIGHT 31 AT 10:05.

OUT OF SHREVEPORT?

YES, SIR.

I'M SO SORRY.

DID I EVER TELL YOU YOU'RE A LITTLE BIT ACCIDENT-PRONE?

I THINK YOU MENTIONED IT.

HOW YOU DOIN'?

FINE.

WHAT'S IN THE BAG?

WHOA. DON'T MOVE.

FBI.

WE CAN CUFF YOU AND MAKE A SCENE, OR YOU CAN WALK OUT NICE AND EASY.

LET'S GO.

LAYLA: OF COURSE, WHEN I FOUND THE MONEY,

I REALIZED I'D SUDDENLY UNDERMINED THE ENTIRE CASE.

MAN: UNDERMINED?

THAT'S RIGHT.

AT THAT POINT, THE CASE WOULD'VE BEEN OVER.

I WOULD'VE NAILED GIBSON, BUT THAT MEANT

MOSE HUDDENAL WAS ABOUT TO WALK AWAY A FREE MAN.

IT WAS MOSE WE SENT YOU TO GET IN THE FIRST PLACE.

EXACTLY.

NOW, I REALIZE THIS WASN'T 100% BY THE BOOK,

BUT I JUST DECIDED TO THROW THAT CASH ON OUT THERE

AS IF I'D NEVER SEEN IT.

NARROWLY SIDESTEPPING

A LITTLE PROBLEM CALLED ENTRAPMENT.

WELL, I JUST WANTED THE BAD GUYS

TO HAVE THE CHANCE TO REGAIN THEIR STOLEN CASH.

THAT WAY, I HAD THE CHANCE OF NAILING MOSE AND EVERYBODY ELSE.

AND IF THIS CHANCE HADN'T PAID OFF?

IF IT HAD BACKFIRED IN YOUR FACE,

WHICH IT COULD HAVE,

WE'D HAVE BEEN OUT THE MONEY

AND THE GUYS WHO WERE LAUNDERING THE MONEY.

THAT'S TRUE.

BUT IT DID WORK.

YOU'RE DAMN LUCKY IT DID.

I DON'T APPROVE.

I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT.

YES, SIR.

BUT YOU DID LAND MOSE HUDDENAL,

WHICH WAS SOMETHING NOBODY ELSE WAS ABLE TO DO,

NOT TO MENTION

THE $2.9 MILLION YOU RECLAIMED.

YES.

THIS YOUNG MAN THAT HELPED OUT,

DOES HE EXPECT TO BE REIMBURSED

FOR HIS CONTRIBUTION?

OH, I THINK HE FEELS HE'S BEEN PAID.

HE'S JUST HAPPY TO SEE JUSTICE DONE.

WELL, THAT'S WONDERFUL.

YOU'VE PUT IN FOR 2 WEEKS?

YES, SIR.

CONSIDER IT APPROVED.

THANK YOU.

WHERE YOU GOING?

OH...

I THOUGHT MAYBE I'D GO TO THE CARIBBEAN.

HAVE A NICE TRIP.

(DING DING)

HI.

HI.

I WAS LOOKIN' FOR A PILOT.

I'M A PILOT.

IS THAT YOUR BEECH 18 OUT THERE?

WHY, YES IT IS.

WELL, IT'S A BEAUTY.

IT'S GOT A REBUILT ENGINE, NEW PAINT JOB, NEW SEATS.

IT'S GOT THE WORKS.

WELL, I WAS THINKIN' I'D LIKE TO GO SOMEPLACE REMOTE.

REMOTE AND SECLUDED?

OH, YEAH.

THE MORE REMOTE AND SECLUDED, THE BETTER.

HEH. WELL, IT JUST SO HAPPENS

THAT WE HAVE A DEAL ON REMOTE AND SECLUDED TODAY.

REALLY?

IS THAT TRUE?

YES, THAT IS TRUE.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

I MISSED YOU.

I MISSED YOU, TOO.

CHUCK: I DIDN'T KNOW WHERE WE WERE GOIN'

OR WHAT WAS GONNA HAPPEN,

BUT FOR THE MOMENT, LAYLA AND I WERE TOGETHER,

AND THAT WAS PERFECT.

* LADIES SURE DO LOVE THEIR OUTLAWS *

* ROBBIN' BANKS AND LIVIN' A LIFE OF CRIME *

* BUT YOU'LL NEVER GO TO HEAVEN *

* ROBBIN' A 7-ELEVEN *

* YOU'LL BE BREAKIN' ROCKS AND DOIN' LOTS OF TIME *

* SOMEHOW IT DOESN'T MAKE NO DIFFERENCE *

* THERE'S SOMETHIN' ABOUT A MAN WHO'S ON THE RUN *

* SOME GIRLS LOVE LOSERS, VAGABONDS, AND BOOZERS *

* SOME JUST LIKE THE GUY WHO'S HAVIN' FUN *

* IT'S SAD WHEN YOU AIN'T GOT TOO MANY CHOICES *

* THE SMALLEST TOWNS, THEY ONLY GOT ONE ROAD *

* AND THEY SAY THAT WHEN YOU DIE *

* IT'S WHERE YOU GO TO FRY *

* AND SOME FOLKS, THEY CALL IT INFERNO *

* IT'S SAD WHEN YOU AIN'T GOT TOO MANY CHOICES *

* THE SMALLEST TOWNS, THEY ONLY GOT ONE ROAD *

* AND THEY SAY THAT WHEN YOU DIE *

* IT'S WHERE YOU GO TO FRY *

* AND SOME FOLKS, THEY CALL IT INFERNO *

* THEY SAY THAT LIFE IS LIKE A BOX OF CHOCOLATES *

* IF YOU WAIT TOO LONG, IT MELTS AND FADES AWAY *

* IT TURNS PUPPIES INTO DOGS *

* AND PRINCES INTO FROGS *

* SO YOU HOPE YOU'LL LIVE TO FIGHT ANOTHER DAY *

* YOU HOPE AND DREAM THAT YOU'LL BE GOIN' PLACES *

* AND THE BURNIN' IN YOUR SOUL DON'T FADE AWAY *

* YOU'LL BE ROBBIN', STEALIN', LYIN' *

* IN THE HOPES THAT YOU'LL BE FLYIN' *

* 'CAUSE YOU CAN'T TAKE THIS DAMN TOWN ANOTHER DAY *

* IT'S SAD WHEN YOU AIN'T GOT SO MANY CHOICES *

* THE SMALLEST TOWNS, THEY ONLY GOT ONE ROAD *

* AND THEY SAY THAT WHEN YOU DIE *

* IT'S WHERE YOU GO TO FRY *

* AND SOME FOLKS, THEY CALL IT INFERNO *

* 'CAUSE IT'S SAD WHEN YOU AIN'T GOT SO MANY CHOICES *

* THE SMALLEST TOWNS, THEY ONLY GOT ONE ROAD *

* BUT I LIVED ANOTHER DAY *

* AND FIGURED OUT A WAY *

* TO GET OUT OF INFERNO *