Original subtitles

Starring James Arness as Matt Dillon.

Hey, there's ol' Otie Perkins.

I haven't seen him around for a long time.

Yeah.

You know, I always figured he was a little bit touched in the head.

Oh, he's harmless.

Marshal, I came here to get protection of the law,

and I want every bit of it... Army and Navy included, if need be!

Hold on just a minute there now, Otie.

Now, what reason do you got for needin' all that?

I got reasons that go back 15 years.

I want to swear out an injunction... A bench warrant...

To keep that low-livered scum off my property

and banished from the territory and, uh...

And uh, horse whipped to boot if you can work it in somehow.

Now, you wouldn't be talking about your partner

by any chance, would ya?

I sure am. Brace McCoy.

And I hate to have the sneaky name cross my lips.

Now, you and Brace McCoy have been partners

as long back as I can remember, Otie.

Not no more, we ain't.

I want him thrown clean off my place!

Well, just a minute.

As I remember, you homesteaded that place together.

You're joint tenants, you know.

He's got as much right to it as you have.

I want to get a fella throwed off of my property, Marshal.

And that's a fact.

I see.

You wouldn't by any chance be referring to Otie here, would ya?

That's the man, Marshal. But him and me ain't speakin' no more.

You're darn right we ain't, now nor never!

I'll sign them papers now if'n you'll write 'em up.

I got here first, Marshal.

That little varmint can't read.

Why, he can't even write.

I can make as good an X as you can any day!

All right, now why don't both of you shut up a minute

and tell me what this is all about?

Well... Come on, let's have it.

Well, it's... it's a little personal, Marshal.

I'd rather not say.

I see.

You've known each other 15 years.

You've lived together. You built a place together.

Now, you're gettin' ready to kill each other and you can't say why, huh?

I'm a little particular who I live with.

I want this here little sidewinder thrown off of my property

and out of my house, Marshal.

- It ain't your house! - It is my house!

No, sir, it's my house!

All right, now just a minute. I want to tell you something.

As far as I'm concerned, you're joint tenants on that place,

and I've got no legal reason to throw either one of you off.

I've already offered to buy him out, Marshal.

I ain't a-budgin', and that's a fact!

All right.

If you two can't settle this between yourselves,

I'll have to settle it for ya.

Come on inside.

Come on. Didn't you hear him?

All right, now, you men both own that ranch.

You're both gonna have to stay on it and run it 'til it's sold.

That's right, Marshal.

I ain't budgin'.

As I remember, you got a pretty good house there

and a good barn.

One of you stays in the barn.

The other one stays in the house.

High man takes his choice.

All right.

7 of clubs.

Jack of clubs.

All right, Otie, what's your choice?

I'll take the barn. It don't smell so much like Brace McCoy.

You sawed-off little gopher.

If you so much as step near my house...

Now listen to me, both of you.

If there's any more trouble between you, I'm gonna run you in here,

and you're gonna sell that ranch from jail.

You understand?

I'll be gettin' on out to my house.

That big tub of lard don't scare me one bit!

Hello, Kitty.

Well, Matt.

You're as welcome a sight as...

a hunter's moon through a Tamarack bush.

Well, now. You're in a poetical mood today.

You sound like a singin' chief of the Cherokees.

No. Kiowa.

That's her tribe.

Whose tribe?

Summer Dove's.

She was helping me sew some dresses this afternoon.

Summer Dove. Summer Dove.

You remember her.

She's the woman that left the reservation last spring

and went to work at Moss Molly's boarding house.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

She's a good seamstress.

Darn good cook, too.

Of course, she's a little lost since Moss Molly went back east.

Mm.

Well, why don't we have a drink to her?

I have tasted the morning wind from the south,

and my heart beats the lark's song.

That's somethin' Doc always says.

It means "Sure, I'll have a drink."

All right. Okay.

Oh, Matt, golly, I was just lookin' for you.

You know, I just came in from out by the flats there,

and I passed that McCoy-Perkins ranch,

and those two... Well, they got a war goin' on.

What do you mean?

Well, it's terrible.

One of 'em's barricaded himself in the barn,

and the other one's holed up in the house,

and they're shootin' at each other.

Sounds like the Battle of Richmond.

Well, I haven't heard from them for three days.

I was kind of hopin' maybe they'd cooled off a little.

Oh, they haven't. My gosh, it's terrible.

Well, guess I'm gonna have to put off that drink, Kitty.

But I'm sure Doc will have one.

Oh, sure. I tasted the morning wind...

Yeah. And your heart beats the lark's song.

Oh...

Hold your fire!

Otie, is that you in there?

You're darn tootin' it is.

And I ain't gonna let that big hunk of wolf bait dislodge me, either.

Well, I'm gonna dislodge ya.

Now I'm going to give you just five seconds to throw that rifle out.

Oh, now wait a minute, Marshal.

You heard me!

Well, all right.

This ain't fair!

I ain't the one that started it.

Doggone it, you ought to make Brace stop shootin', too!

Hold your fire, Brace!

Chester.

Yes, sir.

Take his rifle away from him. Get his six-gun, too.

Yes, sir.

Marshal, this ain't fair!

You almost got me killed,

and I ain't gonna stand for it.

He was just takin' potshots at ya.

He's not gonna kill an unarmed man.

Oh, he wouldn't?

He'd shoot his own mother in the back, Brace McCoy would.

Brace!

Get out of here, Marshal. We got a private war goin' on!

Not anymore you don't.

Now, are you gonna stop shootin', or am I gonna start?

All right, all right.

You got no cause to get all lathered up.

Then quit jabberin' and get on out here.

Sure, sure.

And you get his gun, Marshal.

I don't want him takin' a shot at me.

Nobody's gonna shoot anybody.

I'll take the pistol, too.

You're treatin' me like a criminal, Marshal.

You dirty rat! You almost killed me!

I was just defending myself, Marshal.

That grizzly little gopher started it all.

He's a liar, Marshal, and he always was.

Mr. Dillon, do we have to stand here all day

and listen to these two squabble?

Nope.

I guess about the only thing I can do with you men

is to put you in separate cells and see how you get along.

You're under arrest, both of ya.

- What for? - Disturbin' the peace.

Well, you can't do that.

There ain't nobody for miles around here.

Whose peace are we disturbing?

Mine.

Now, get your horses.

Well, good morning, boys.

How 'bout it? You about ready to stop feuding?

Sure. If Brace will get himself off my property.

I ain't budgin'. And that's a fact.

I see. Kind of like it here, huh?

A man can't forget his principles, Marshal.

Principles? He ain't got no more principles than a hungry wolf.

I'll bet you two don't even remember what it was that started all this.

I can remember, all right.

He figured I wasn't fancying up his vittles enough to suit him.

For a whole week, he didn't fix nothin' but flapjacks in the mornin'

and hominy grits at night.

With side meats with 'em!

That weren't side meat. That was sow belly.

And it wasn't fittin' to be ate.

And you know what he did?

When I put those mashed grits on the table,

he threw them on the ground

and stomped on 'em with his boots on!

That's all they was fit for.

I can remember the time you ate 'em every day!

You mean to tell me that it was

a little thing like that that started all this?

Yeah. And I began to realize I was livin' with a viper.

You can be mighty mistook about a man.

All right, boys.

Just settle on back.

Now, wait a minute.

How long you goin' to keep us in this cage?

Until you grow up!

Hello, Doc.

Hi.

What brings you out so early in the day?

Well, I just came by for some of Chester's poison here.

Mm-hmm.

Oh, my gosh!

That stuff will kill blackwater fever germ.

I noticed that you ain't dead yet. You drunk a whole barrel of it.

- Here, why don't... - Oh, don't!

Oh, Doc, look what you made me do there!

What are you so jumpy about?

I'll tell ya, you two are worse than they are.

Who? Oh, you mean those two?

Yep.

- They still at it? - Yep.

Huh. Do you know what I figure about those two stubborn ol' fools there?

They're probably just dying to make up.

Yeah. I was thinkin' along those lines myself, Doc.

Seems to me like they could have shot each other

easy enough out there at the ranch the other day

if they'd really wanted to.

Sure, they could.

Well, what can you do about it?

Well, Doc, I don't know.

I'm afraid if I turn 'em loose,

they're liable to kill each other by accident.

Well... sadly,

my gosh, you just got to keep 'em locked up.

That's all there is to it.

You can't do that. If you do, they're goin' to die of old age.

I never seen two more stubborn old men in my life.

You can't turn 'em loose to commit mayhem.

Commit what?

Mayhem.

Well, Doc, they ain't gonna do that. That's for sure.

Well, why not?

Well, you're the only one around here knows what it means.

Say, Chester, I want you to do something for me.

Yeah.

Now, there's an Indian woman around town.

Of course, I hate to be disturbin' you here.

Yeah.

There's an Indian woman around town by the name of Summer Dove.

Now, Kitty knows where she is.

I want you to find her and bring her back here.

Yeah... well, oh... oh, well, all right.

Doc, I wouldn't do that.

Huh?

That's a whole day's work.

She... She come yet?

- Summer Dove? - Yeah.

Oh, yeah. She was here a couple of hours ago.

Oh well, I told her to and all.

You know, and I figured you wouldn't need me,

and so I just stopped by the stable to see how Moss was doin'.

Mm-hmm.

How much did you lose?

Huh?

How much did you lose to Moss matchin' dimes?

Uh... well, how'd you know?

Look, do me a favor, will ya?

Take this letter down to Mr. Knight at the depot.

And get it off, will ya?

It's all fixed, Marshal.

Ah, Summer Dove. Right in there.

How do you do, ma'am? Miss Dove.

Chester very polite for a white man.

Smelled kind of good, didn't it?

We'll save some for you.

Yeah. Well...

Boys, I'd like to have you meet a friend of mine.

This is Summer Dove.

- Howdy! - Hi.

I thought you fellas might be gettin' a little tired of your food around here,

so she very kindly offered to fix you up some vittles.

They couldn't be goin' to hang us, could they?

I don't know.

They always feed a man good

before they hang him, don't they, Marshal?

Don't you worry, Otie. Nobody's gonna hang you...

Not unless you murder somebody.

Here.

Antelope stew. My own style.

What's them weeds doin' in it?

Not weeds. Kiowa herbs for taste.

You no like it, you throw it out.

Well, don't get your back in a hump.

It sure smells pretty good, Brace.

It does.

Biscuit?

Thank you.

Hot biscuit?

Uh-huh.

Well, Summer Dove, wouldn't you like to come out and sit down?

Sure, Marshal.

That don't taste bad after all.

Mmm. I... I don't know what she done to it,

but that's the best antelope I ever tasted.

Must be them weeds she put in it.

Mmm. Mighty savory weeds.

Otie: Hey, Marshal! Marshal Dillon!

Get that woman back in here!

How's that?

We want some more of that stuff.

Yeah. It's the best I ever ate.

Mm-hmm.

All right, but first I want to tell you about Summer Dove, boys.

Now, she needs a place to live, and she's willing to work for it.

What's you gettin' at?

Now, as I recall, you got a pretty good tack room out there in that barn of yours.

It could be fixed up pretty comfortable.

That is, if you want to take on about the best cook in Ford County.

It's okay with me, Marshal.

I could eat like that three times a day without bein' bitter about it.

Me too!

Of course, I'd be eatin' alone...

in my house.

Otie: If she cooks in the tack room, she'll serve meals in the barn.

She'd expect to serve a pig like you in the barn, wouldn't she?

Now, wait a minute, you two.

I should have cut your throat before I ever saw ya!

You would think of a dirty thing like that, you little weasel.

But you'd probably bleed yellow.

You won't live to see it.

Good mornin', Chester.

Mornin', Mr. Dillon.

Well, how are the boys today?

Oh, they're worse than ever.

I brung them their coffee this morning.

That Otie tried to throw his all over Brace,

made him madder than a steer caught in a thorn picket.

I don't know what to do with 'em.

Well, I'll tell you, Mr. Dillon.

I just... I don't think they're ever gonna stop fightin'.

I think you ought to just turn 'em loose and let 'em have at it.

You know something? I think you got an idea there.

Huh?

Only I'm not gonna turn 'em loose.

What are you gonna do with their guns?

Otie: Chester! Chester!

Yeah.

Chester!

All right.

I want some coffee.

Well, Otie, if you and Brace hadn't had such a fit this morning,

you'd have had your coffee.

Never mind the lecture!

Give me some coffee!

Forget about the coffee.

All right, you two.

I'm sick and tired of your arguing.

Now, get it settled, once and for all.

Now, look here, Marshal.

Wait a minute!

Well?

Well, what?

Well, grab your gun.

You grab yours.

All right, I will.

What are you gonna do?

You don't think I'm gonna stand here

and let you shoot me right in the eye, do ya?

You always was a big coward, Brace McCoy!

Chester: Shh.

Shh. Be quiet, Doc.

What's the matter?

Well, I told ya to be quiet. Ain't you got no respect?

Respect for who?

Otie Perkins and Brace McCoy.

They're about to kill theirselves in there.

Matt, would you mind translatin' that for me?

Well, I'm afraid he's right, Doc.

I got tired of their nonsense, and I gave 'em back their guns.

Well, I sure came to the right place.

Business has been a little bad lately.

You know, Doc, you're just about as cold as a fish froze in ice.

No feelin's at all.

He serious? You give them their guns?

I sure did.

Well, that's the craziest thing I ever heard of.

I got ya, Brace.

I got you right where I always wanted ya.

Okay, Otie.

You win.

Go ahead, shoot.

You bet I'll shoot.

Prepare to die, Brace.

You're about to pay for all the nasty things you done.

Go ahead, get it over with.

I can't do it.

Brace, I can't do it.

I can't do it.

Well, I can!

You had your chance, Otie.

Now, you're gonna die.

I can't do it, either, Otie.

I just ain't got the stomach for it.

Otie: Marshal! Marshal Dillon!

We've been sort of talkin' things over,

and we kind of like that nice Indian gal's cookin'.

Don't we, Brace?

Yeah. Yeah, we sure do.

And we thought maybe if she came out to the house, like you said,

we'd eat pretty good.

Mm-hmm.

Well, that was the idea.

And, Marshal, she can serve the meals in the house.

Otie can eat there, if'n he wants to.

Chester, turn 'em loose.

I'm beginning to see through this whole thing.

Pretty smart.

Worked out pretty good, huh?

Well, boys, you'll find Summer Dove over at Miss Kitty's.

They're having a sewing bee there this morning.

Oh, that's a shameful waste of a good cook's talents.

Let's go save her, Otie.

I'm with ya, Brace.

Goodbye, Marshal. Doc. Chester.

Bye, everybody.

Brace.

Mr. Dillon, they forget their guns.

Oh well, I'll take 'em, Chester.

They'll be back for 'em before they leave town.

Those two were too excited about that Indian cook

to think of anything else right now.

Well, I'll tell you somethin', Mr. Dillon.

You took an awful chance there givin' them loaded guns like that.

Well, they could've killed theirselves.

For heaven's sake, Chester.

Looks like you had everybody fooled but me, Matt.

What do you mean?

Go ahead, tell him, Doc. You got it all figured out.

Well, the guns ain't loaded.

They wasn't?

Oh.

Well, of course, Doc. Now, why didn't I think of that?

Doc, let me tell you something.

You know, if I'd given them unloaded guns, they'd have known it right off.

Wouldn't have proved a thing.

Watch this.

It's a funny thing, isn't it?

Sometimes it takes a loaded gun to prove a friendship.