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- * hey, yeah, hey
Check, check.
Uno, dos, tres.
Um, can I get a little more Monitor, please?
- you got it.
- * ooh, mmm
- sage. - * yeah
- hey, craig.
I didn't know the label Was coming out tonight.
- the set's about to start, So I'll cut to the chase.
We're concerned about lita.
- you gotta be kidding me. The deal just closed. Craig.
I mean, the band Kicked ass in london.
Lita was amazing.
- she was amazing. Is.
Our concerns are Less creative than personal.
The partying, what went down At the dorchester.
- I don't know what you heard, But everything's cool, really.
- look, sage, Lita's awesome.
She's ten seconds from Putting avril out to pasture.
I'd hate for things To blow up
Just 'cause her mom Didn't keep her in line.
- you tell the label to...
- nothing.
Mom, words.
- just some stupid rumors About london.
Mom, those aren't rumors. - lita, don't start.
- mom, it's between me And the label, okay?
- you're 16 years old And I'm the mother.
- mom, it's my career, Not yours.
I'll handle it myself. - yeah, fine.
You can start right now.
- mom!
Mom!
- dude, The set's about to start.
- max, jesus. One minute.
[voices shouting In distance]
- look, it's all there!
- you messed With the wrong guys, homie.
Where's my money, ese?
- max! Max! Max, open then door!
- yo, that bitch Saw us, man!
Hey! - max, open the door!
- handle her, man! Get her!
- hey, come here!
- we gotta bounce, dog!
- we got you now.
- let's go.
- mountain states Adoption agency.
- I'm fine. Just tell stan I'll be in after lunch.
- another "Ob
- no, and for the last time, It's ob/gyn.
"Ob-gine." Who says that?
I'm at the, you know--
I'm at the agency.
- yeah, he said, um, You know,
He's fine with whatever I decide, baby-wise,
As long as there's no Responsibility on his end.
Those words?
- that was the implication.
- you didn't tell him, Did you?
- technically, no, But if I had,
Trust me, that would have Been the implication.
- sounds like A stand-up guy.
- I'm sure He's the same old dick.
Uh, okay. Well, that's funny, dick.
Okay. Yeah. I'll call you later. Okay.
Bye, dick.
That was just my friend, Dick.
- you must be mary. - yeah.
- mrs. Anders, Your placement counselor.
Shall we? - sure.
I'll just follow you In there, then.
Okay.
- well, you do make An impression.
Attractive, College-educated,
A law enforcement officer In perfect physical health.
- oh, wow. I mean, I don't know about perfect.
- on the phone, You seemed pretty sure
About making An adoption plan,
But before we get Too far down the road,
Are you sure about this?
- uh, am I In the right office?
- I have to ask.
I spend my days
Across from Frantic teenagers,
Crying on the couch.
- oh, well, luckily,
I'm neither frantic Nor a teenager.
- it's just important To make sure
Adoption Is the right choice
For you and for your child.
- well, um, I've thought about it a lot--
You know, about all The different choices--
And I just know this is The right one
For everyone involved.
- good.
At some point, We'll need the father
To sign the waiver Of parental rights.
- I suspect that won't be A problem.
- meanwhile...
- profiles of potential Adoptive families.
Photos, statements About who they are,
Why they're Choosing adoption.
- wow.
Wow, this is--
- surreal.
- the idea is to find An ideal match
For you and your child.
I've narrowed it to ten,
And if none of these works, We'll look at others.
- so then, I choose The baby's family?
- you do, And choose wisely.
Your child's future May very well be
Right there in your hands.
- every day.
- who knew this many people Owned a canoe?
- no. No, no, no.
No one's this perfect. They're hiding something.
- mary, you're working with A fairly reputable agency,
I think it's safe to say. - yeah. Get a load of this.
Fifth grade teacher And her attorney husband?
Right. Like I'm buying that.
I mean, if you think I'm gonna Let some sleazebag con jobs
Like "The templetons" Get their mitts on this,
Not on my watch, mister.
- mary, good news
About those vacation days You've got coming.
- yeah, I'm rolling those Into my maternity leave.
- oh, roll 'em in all you want, But I'm gonna give you
An extra couple days now, Call it a bonus.
- thanks, but now Is not the best time
For me to take off, so--
- mary, you haven't had A day off in months.
That's no good, even if You weren't, you know,
Like--
- he can't say it. - fun to watch him try.
- mary, you have to relax, Okay?
It's not an opinion. It's a medical fact.
- look, I do not need To relax. I'm fine.
Yes, maybe my feet Are swelling up,
I'm walking around on A couple of christmas hams,
And I might be A tiny bit irritable.
- never.
Do you know what my ancestors Did when they were pregnant?
Double-fisted whiskey While cultivating tater tots.
They never even Left the fields.
They just pushed those suckers Out their hoo-has
And kept on plowing.
- they also died toothless At 28.
- marshall, not helping.
Mary, not a request. Go home.
- come on.
Shut up.
It's "Preggist" Is what it is,
And yes, I just Made up that word.
You can't just order Someone to relax.
- yeah, what kind of tyrant Does that?
- one looking to get Bitch-slapped by gloria allred,
That's what kind.
- he's here. I'll call you back.
No. No. No, no, no.
Come on, I don't even Like dogs,
And I'm five seconds from Calling the humane society.
- I swear, I just went in To get treats and a collar,
But how could I resist?
I mean, he's a perfect Little bumblebee.
I mean, look at him.
- I am looking at him.
I asked you To dog-sit, brandi.
That means feed him, Walk him,
Let him crash on your couch.
I mean, god, even on halloween, Who does that?
- okay, think about it As practice for the baby.
- okay, I'm just gonna keep Saying this till it sinks in.
I'm not keeping the baby.
- are you absolutely, Positively sure?
- yes, I'm sure.
Look, adoptive families.
I have to pick.
- no, I do.
Okay, that's not The royal "I."
- I have to go, anyway.
- yeah.
- shame. - let's go, oscar.
- hey, has stan Come to his senses
About the mandated time off,
Or is he looking To get his ass kicked
By me and my soon-to-be Size 16s?
- I scoured The h.R. Handbook.
Sadly, there's nothing To support your claim
Of "Preggism" In the workplace.
- true.
But I have a solution that Should make you both happy.
- yeah, well, We'll see about that.
- got a witness out near Las cruces, carlos ramirez.
- sounds familiar. He the hubcap thief?
- doj saw it as a little More involved than that,
But yes, he worked In car accessories.
We have a message from his Family that needs delivering,
And carlos and his phone Aren't exactly
On speaking terms right now.
He goes off the grid Every so often.
- so you want me To drive out there
And deliver the message In person?
- official witsec business.
You'd be on the clock The whole time.
Hello?
- I think so.
She just hung up without A sarcastic comment.
- lucky bounce With the witness.
- considering the message,
Lucky's not the word That leaps to mind.
I'll forward The details now.
- a little working road trip. Just what the doctor ordered.
This is stan. - stan, I can't reach mary.
I don't know what to do! It's kenna...
- it's okay, just calm down. Calm down.
- stan, she's really Done it this time.
Please, I need help.
I mean, acting out is one thing, But this--this is serious.
- it's okay. Just calm down.
- she's putting us both In danger!
- okay, just--just-- It's gonna be okay.
Just take it easy.
- please, you've got To talk to her.
- one--britt, one sec, One sec.
Something with kenna, Mary's rock star kid.
Mom says it's an emergency.
Britt, just hold tight. We're on our way.
We're on our way.
- since 1970,
The federal witness Protection program
Has relocated thousands Of witnesses--
Some criminal, some not--
To neighborhoods All across the country.
Every one Of those individuals
Shares a unique attribute, Distinguishing them
From the rest Of the general population,
And that is...
Somebody wants them dead.
This is carlos ramirez.
I can't come To the phone right now,
So leave a message, And remember,
The path of hot coals Is one of transformation.
Namaste.
- carlos, this is Mary shannon again.
I work with marshall.
If you could return my call Asap,
Number's the same As the last three times.
The getaway, I guess, Is in my blood.
Away from the screaming Chaos of my childhood home,
I would fly out the door And hop on my bike,
White knuckling The handlebars
With nowhere to go, I'd pedal as fast as it took
To feel my hair in the wind And the sting on my face.
Whether I wanted to be found Or just missed, I'm not sure.
But no one ever sent out A search party.
- thank god you're here. Kenna's a nightmare.
The last two days have Just been slamming doors
And kicking walls.
- that. That triggered all this.
Go ahead, show them.
This is what you call "Blending in"?
- those frantic, Furious bike rides
Never took me more than A few miles from my house,
But it was far enough For me to learn
That I could get back On my own,
And that sometimes The best way to find yourself
Is to get yourself lost.
- like I'm gonna Get recognized.
We live in nowheresville. Relax.
Who cares about the rules.
Put us both in danger. What's the big deal, right?
- well, maybe if you weren't Such a control freak.
- all right, just knock it off, Both of you, okay?
Kenna, the blue streak, Not safe.
I'm talking Life-threatening.
- I want to talk to mary. - no can do.
You're gonna have to Work this one out with us.
- there is no Working things out.
She's like stick up her ass, 24/7.
Six months ago, she was Listening to animal collective
And playing roller derby.
Now it's like some Kate gosselin pod person
Took her over.
- I'm doing this, All of it, for you,
And I'm not a control freak.
- oh. Oh, And this is the part
Where she brings up letting me Do choir.
- I thought you were Excited about choir.
- whoa, whoa, wait a minute. - I am excited.
- it's not the choir part.
It's the letting me. - fine. Skip the concert.
Up to you.
- I'm not skipping it.
- singing in public Is a violation of the rules.
That's on both of you.
- it's today. I can't not go.
Please.
- I'll tag along, Keep an eye on things.
- thank you.
- and I'm not Taking this out.
It's the one thing I have control of.
- it's a tricky situation.
When we make her Take it out,
She could rebel Even harder,
Run away, put herself In real danger.
- yeah, but keeping the streak Is out of the question.
It was her trademark. It's her number one identifier.
I'm turning around. - relax.
Et tu, marshall?
- just give me a little time. I'll handle it.
Anyway, I need you To deliver that message,
And carlos needs to hear it.
- oh, well, then, You know what he should try?
Answering his goddamn phone.
- yeah, he's kind of Neo-luddite that way.
Let me know When you get there.
I'll take another shot At kenna,
See if I can talk Some sense into her.
Did you just yelp?
- nope. - aw.
Road-tripping with oscar.
I thought finding him A new home
Was gonna be--your words--
"Easier than a divorcee At oktoberfest."
- yeah, well, I may have overestimated.
And it turns out the kennel Business is a total racket.
Toss a handful of kibble In a cage twice a day,
80 bucks a pop?
Forget witsec. We should get in on this.
We'll retire at 40.
Well, I will.
- uh-huh. And your other Candidate for placement?
Working on it.
Just gotta smoke out The dirtbags.
- that's the spirit. Call you later.
You just went.
No more scratching! No!
- okay.
Okay. Okay.
God.
Ow, ow. Ooh.
Oscar. Oscar!
Hey! You want to be coyote food, That's on you!
*
- look, I wanted To talk to you,
Musician to musician.
That's a joke, right?
- no. When I was a kid, I played the oboe.
I was good. Like quasi-prodigy good.
- the oboe. Wow. That's, like, super nerdy.
- anyway, one day, My dad took it away.
- like, he wouldn't let you Pursue your dream?
- no, he just Hid the thing.
Said if I could figure out Where it was,
I could play it All I wanted.
My dad's always been A bit unorthodox
When it comes to motivation.
Anyway, that whole episode Was how I discovered
My love of detective work,
Which eventually led me To the marshal service,
Which led me to you.
- do you know how many teenage Girls streak their hair?
- kenna, it was Your signature thing.
- so maybe I'm a fan, A fan of lita,
Wearing a blue streak
In tribute To her mysterious disappearance.
- listen, I looked for my oboe For three days,
And as long as Those three days were,
I can't imagine What you're going through.
To lose your band, A record deal.
- for me, It was just the music.
You know, teaching kids Guitar at silver lake.
I dug it.
- yeah, but from playing gigs All over the world
To sitting in An albuquerque math class?
- believe me, I know.
I've gone from Skyrocketing phenom
To living In rural obscurity.
- choir members, Places, please.
- I've gotta get out there.
Hi.
- * why should I feel
* discouraged?
* why should The shadows come? *
* why should my heart Be lonely *
* and long for heaven And home? *
- * when jesus is My portion *
* a constant friend Is he *
* his eye
* is on the sparrow
* and I know
* he watches me
What kind of detour?
- oh, just taking a stroll, Enjoying nature,
You know, the way I do.
- yeah, You're a regular sacajawea.
You were lewis and clark's Next phone call.
You get a hold of carlos? - he's still not answering.
If this guy's a no-show When I get to his ranch,
I swear to god.
- it's more an alpaca farm Than a ranch.
What the hell Is an alpaca? Ow!
- the domesticated species of The south american camelid.
- sweet jesus, just-- - it's a llama, but small.
Since taking an early retirement From the hubcap business,
Carlos has gone A little hippie granola.
In addition to his Alpaca-nomics,
He fancies himself A bit of a shaman.
Holy god. Ow!
Oh!
- everything but my feet.
What about-- What about kenna?
Did you get the hair thing Squared away or what?
- yep, yep. Everything's copacetic.
- don't say copacetic.
- better than sooner.
Ow, ow, ow.
Oscar! Oscar!
Oh.
Huh.
- dad! - hi.
Hi. - dad.
- sorry. Just, uh, My car is--
Oh, anyway, I'm looking for--
Have you seen a dog? Pit bull?
He's about the size Of a...Pit bull?
- we have seen him. - oh.
Oh, that's great. Thank you so much.
Whoo! This is, uh, some place.
Great bottle collection.
Oh, boy.
- he isn't feeling Too good.
Pooped all over Our energy garden.
- well, you've got An energy garden.
Kinda had it coming.
Oh! Don't move. I mean it.
- we told her When she entered witsec
That any public singing Was out of bounds.
She knew the rules.
- it's a high school choir, Not the viper room.
- the m.O.U. Didn't specify The where, just the what.
Now look, I feel For the kid too. I do.
But she's compromising Her safety and her mother's.
If she wants our protection,
Kenna's got to follow The letter.
I put a call in To shelly finkel, all right?
Maybe a few therapy sessions Will help kenna see the light.
- I wouldn't count on that.
Her attorney Wants to speak to you.
- the one that's Waiting downstairs.
What's bloat?
I'm not really A dog person.
- well, it's when a tummy Of a dog or a cat
Or anything really Gets stretched out
On account of excess gas.
Or it could just be His diet.
- oh, sure. I mean, beef jerky And grilled cheese
Would be really bad for him, Obviously, so none of that.
- I could try an energy Cleanse if you'd like.
Anoint him with some Homemade peppermint oil?
- yeah. No, thanks. No to the energy cleanse.
I think we'll probably Just head out.
Do you mind me asking, What do you...Do?
I mean, do you just Sort of live here?
- not just. We do everything.
We home-school the kids, We sew our own clothes,
Grow organic vegetables.
Just got the one. - huh.
- it's an offbeat way To raise a family,
I'll grant you that, But it works for us.
Our kids are happy And safe.
What else matters?
- I practice family law With a subspeciality
In juvenile matters And guardianship.
Kenna asked me To handle her case.
- she's told you Her situation?
- you're referring To the fact
That kenna's In witness protection?
- when you say you're Handling her "Case"--
- I'm filing for emancipation From my mother.
I don't want to leave Witness protection, just her.
- give us a minute.
You realize What you've done here?
- I have a right To an attorney.
Or is that only For the bad guys?
- of course you do, But you breached security.
You're probably gonna have To be moved again.
My choir?
- no more choir ever.
Brand-new school In a brand-new city.
- that is completely Unacceptable.
I want to talk to mary.
Now! - no!
Inspectors mann and parmalee Are gonna take you home to pack.
You will have no contact With your attorney
Until I say so.
Clear?
Am I clear?
- carlos' neighbor Just called me from his cell.
She can't find him.
House is empty. Front door is wide open.
Your witness is in the wind.
- how long has he Been missing again?
- not sure.
The last time the neighbors saw Him was three days ago.
- the sheriff's meeting mary At carlos' ranch.
- testified late '90s.
The guy he rolled on, vazquez,
Got parole three years back, But--
- maybe reach out to his p.O.,
Make sure vazquez Is nowhere close.
- already did. We're good, marshall.
Mary's fine. She's a big girl and she--
Well, you know...
Not literally, But you know, just--
- no, I understand.
Yeah.
Get going.
- yeah, hey.
- sheriff taylor. - nice to meet you.
- you made pretty good time.
- well, is that a compliment Or am I
Getting a retroactive Speeding ticket?
Nothing? Okay.
She the one who found his phone? - yeah, the neighbor.
We just searched the house.
No sign of mr. Ramirez.
- did you go over The property?
- not yet.
Hey!
- I'm carlos.
You've been looking for me.
- what, I'm supposed To be impressed by that?
I'm wearing a badge, I brought the sheriff,
And I just pulled back The welcome mat
On your hole in the ground.
Yeah, carnac, I've been looking for you.
- you have a message About my family.
- all right, I'll admit, That's kind of spooky.
- I've been on a vision quest.
- of course you have.
- come, I'll tell you All about it.
- please don't.
Come on, let's go.
- under normal circumstances,
Emancipation For a minor witness
Wouldn't even Be a consideration.
In kenna's case though,
There are extenuating Circumstances.
- I'm not sure I follow.
- my mom, london, Everything.
- you have to admit,
Britt's spotty record As a parent
Gives kenna A pretty good case.
- whoa, whoa, whoa. Spotty record?
- the drug use, The embezzlement.
- all right, Did you tell her that, hmm?
Did you tell her? Those are lies.
She's been in our program For six months now.
Britt's an outstanding parent.
- yeah, now. But--
God, mom, seriously?
- okay, this is--
After kenna signed Her record deal,
I started partying On the road.
- "Partying" is mild.
I wish "Partying."
- okay.
- kenna covered for me.
The rumor--she let the label Think it was her.
- every night after our set,
We'd be at some bar With her dancing on tables,
Coked out of her head.
Random guys.
Then there's, um, The dorchester.
- kenna, please.
- I woke up at 3:00 In the morning, mom,
On my birthday.
The suite was trashed.
I found her passed out In a bathtub.
Spent the night in the e.R.
Hell of a sweet 16.
- that was the worst night Of my life,
Because that was The worst night of yours.
Kenna--london,
You suddenly being The breadwinner,
The grown-up in me, So out of control.
It wasn't right. It wasn't fair.
And if I could take it back, I would.
I don't know what to say.
All I know is it happened.
And I am sorry.
I am so sorry.
- kenna will move forward With her emancipation suit
With permission From our office.
- we've contacted justice And asked
To expedite A juvenile hearing.
Until then, Kenna and britt
Will stay put In the safe house.
- until the hearing, yes.
Together.
- can I talk to you For a second?
- wow.
Alpacas are kind of cute.
Can you eat 'em?
- well, you could, But I--
I sell the fleece To a friend in milwaukee
Who makes steering wheel skins And custom seat covers.
- it's a long way From hubcaps,
But you're still in The accessory business, I guess.
This is true.
You know, it's odd...
You know, that a life Of petty crime
Led me to this place.
I was on the right path All along,
Whether I realized it Or not.
- listen, carlos.
This message marshall Asked me to give you,
There's no easy way To say it.
- my mother.
She's with the angels.
I know when it happened.
I saw it manifested In my vision.
- oh, your vision. Right.
- you don't believe. I understand.
I knew the minute she passed.
It was three days ago.
- so that's why you went On your spider hole
Camping trip With the loincloth and--
Well, just the loincloth, Really.
- it is, yes.
It's hard to lose a parent.
- yes.
A parent is a holy thing.
But her time with her children Was done, you know?
- okay then.
Well, take care, carlos.
Good luck with the alpacas.
Hey, let's go.
Thanks.
I heard your message.
Would you like to hear mine?
- from my vision quest. - ahh.
Yeah, thanks.
No, I'm not much into signs And stuff, so.
Anyway, take care.
No. Oh, no!
No, no.
Oh, god.
Not a word.
What, that my mom Was a cokehead
Who charlie sheen'd hotel rooms And blew my paychecks
On new jimmy choos?
When we came Into the program,
I don't know if I felt sorry For her or just--
Yeah.
- I bet.
- when we got to albuquerque,
I guess the world
Stopped spinning so fast, Her head cleared.
- I'm confused.
You covered for her on tour
And now it seems like She's cleaned up her act.
- yeah.
Well, maybe my head Cleared too.
What she did to me Wasn't right.
It's not.
And now I finally make Some friends.
Not roadies. Friends.
God.
Can I at least go to choir, Say good
- I'm sorry. No.
It's too dangerous.
- no one knows I'm here.
I'm not gonna say Where I'm going.
- there are people out there Who are looking for you.
- marshall.
Look at this.
One of britt's pta friends Calls her all excited,
Something about 50,000 hits In the first 90 minutes.
- all these man-hours, Resources to keep her safe,
We get jammed up By a dad with a camera
And an itchy posting finger.
- unbelievable.
From flip phone to youtube.
- yep, our witness Just went viral.
- hey.
- I made him a leash.
It's organic hemp.
Brings me back to my high school Boyfriend's van.
Thanks.
We'll be going now.
- it isn't time, mary.
- oh, I see.
Is this where you go All peyote on me,
Hit me with the folklore-heavy Mystic talk,
Some cliched, Handmade native-american trinket
Like a dream catcher Or turquoise sundial?
Then what?
I see the light, And this time next year,
I'm at interstate off-ramps Handing out pamphlets?
Look, I'm sorry to burst Your crystal,
But it's not gonna happen.
- your loved ones hurt you When you were a child.
It made you fear getting Close to anyone
Because they may hurt you too.
My family wasn't perfect And kids
Are hardwired From an early age.
I mean, I've seen more Savvy insight
On $2 t-shirts And novelty mugs.
- now you have a child On its way.
And a very important choice To make.
- the universe.
- wow, you're really digging Your heels in
On this whole universe thing, Huh?
- follow your spirit guide, Mary.
Okay, well, Give my regards
To the sweat lodge And/or asylum.
Turn the enya up to 11.
See ya.
- oh, thanks.
- you opened your heart to him. That's a start.
Go home.
Let the spirits guide you.
- we could scour the web All day,
Pull down every version Of the video out there.
It's not gonna make a dent.
Someone has it cached Permanently and downloaded.
We may as well be Taking a mop
To the incoming tide.
- mmm, there are millions Of teenage girls
Singing on the internet.
Odds are on our side.
- yeah, one in a million.
That's all it takes For it
To bite us in the ass.
Security detail The safe house.
We don't wait till tomorrow. Send them now.
- I can head over if you want,
Wait till they arrive.
- chief, here's that link.
- we're back with 101.7, Indie rock l.A.
New amateur video on youtube Leads some fans
Of lita and the echoes To wonder
If lita's singing In a high school choir
In albuquerque of all places. Caller one?
- yeah, dude, That band was killer...
- l.A. Morning drive.
- britt, I'm glad you called.
Now listen, as a precaution-- - kenna's gone.
- okay, whoa, whoa, whoa, Okay, slow down, slow down.
- I don't know what to do. I'm freaking out!
- I'm sending a team over, Ten minutes.
Stay put and lock up.
- tel them to hurry, please. - bye.
Kenna took off.
Britt doesn't know where.
- I'm guessing she went To say good-bye
To her friends in the choir.
I told her that was out Of the question.
- well, that always works With teenagers,
"Out of the question."
Next time, maybe take "Over my Dead body" out for a spin.
Did you check with lapd?
- delia did And one of the guys
Kenna's testifying against
Missed A court appearance today.
- and the hits Just keep on coming.
- don't be stupid.
[kenna singing On cell phone]
- * because I'm free
* his eye is on the sparrow
- oh, shoot.
- okay, jeannie, You can play, please.
All right, everyone, Let's begin.
- california plates.
- all right. You hit the auditorium.
I'll be with the principal, Let him know apd's on the way.
- soon as I get kenna-- - we evacuate the school.
Go.
*
Choir: * let me hide myself In thee *
* rock of ages
* cleft for me
* let me hide myself In thee *
* let the water...
- * let the water And the blood *
* from thy riven--
- no, no! Come on!
- u.S. Marshals! Drop your weapon!
Drop it!
- the man said Drop your weapon.
Kenna!
- mary, we're good here.
- we got this, mary.
- okay. All right, it's okay.
You're good. It's okay.
Hey, thanks. - thank him.
- yeah...Thank him.
- yeah, I don't talk to dogs.
All right, kiddo.
Okay. - I'm so sorry.
- it's okay. It's okay.
- walk.
What the hell?
- hey!
You said you were sure!
- I am, but...Easy. Relax.
- don't tell her to relax.
Scalping a witness? Nice.
- with permission. - it's fine.
I liked it and all, But the thing is
The streak was never Really me.
It was all my mom And the label.
And I'm done with All of them.
- yeah, kenna, listen.
About your mom, She asked us to talk to you.
The emancipation And all that--
She's really hoping You'll reconsider.
She wants another shot.
- she had her shot.
She's the one who went All dina lohan on me.
- yeah, party moms are never As much fun as they think.
Look, of course you're right.
She had her shot.
And there's nothing more Soul-sucking than forgiveness,
But sometimes you gotta just Take a deep breath
And close your eyes And fall on your sword.
Look, family's never perfect.
All it is really is yours.
So...The oboe.
- kenna squealed.
- I mean, it's sorta nerdy,
But kind of cool, You know?
"Family's not perfect,
But all it is really Is yours, man."
- I didn't say "Man," Jackass.
- what the hell happened To you on that road trip?
- well, my friend, I met some roadside new-agers,
Got my psychic tea leaves read By an ex-felon in a loincloth,
Had a few random epiphanies,
And one hell Of a top-notch burger.
You know, the usual.
Any progress With the parent trap?
- please. I've got to get rid of this dog.
One thing at a time.
- well, just to put it Out there,
I may be able to help you with, You know, placement.
I mean the dog.
Abigail and I were talking And we were thinking
Since there are two of us And one of you--
I mean, there are Two of you sort of,
But you know what I mean. - sure.
You can take better care Of him than I can.
- logistically speaking.
Unless, you know, You're getting too attached.
Please.
Take him. He's yours.
Just word of advice though.
He'll act like He can handle jerky.
He's bluffing. Come on.
- noted.
- so should we swing by saturday To pick him up?
- oh, yeah, you know,
I've got kind of A busy weekend.
So, you know, Let's talk monday first thing.
- sure.
- cool.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
Just fart the jerky out.
Ugh.
Whew!
- * I'm gonna let it shine
* this little light of mine
* I'm gonna let it shine
* this little light Of mine *
* I'm gonna let it shine
* let it shine, Let it shine *
* let it shine
*
- those things we love In childhood,
Whether it's taking off On your own
Or playing the oboe,
They're planted deep In the ground with you,
Which is why True transformation
Takes more than hot coals And drum circles,
Wandering the woods for a sign Or a path.
But I'll say this.
Robert frost had it right About the road less travelled.
Because not knowing Where you're headed
Leaves you sometimes Right where you belong.
No!
No! No, no, no!
What'd you do?
Oh, man.
*
The templetons?
No!
You are not my spirit guide.
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